1 00:00:15,356 --> 00:00:22,596 Speaker 1: Pushkin. Hey, it's Jake. I hope you enjoyed our season 2 00:00:22,796 --> 00:00:26,356 Speaker 1: The Truth about Sarah. We'll be having a live event 3 00:00:26,596 --> 00:00:29,916 Speaker 1: later this year. It's going to be a conversation between 4 00:00:29,996 --> 00:00:33,876 Speaker 1: me and my co host Jess McHugh, and we want 5 00:00:33,916 --> 00:00:37,436 Speaker 1: to hear from you too. What questions do you have 6 00:00:37,556 --> 00:00:41,516 Speaker 1: for us about this season? Send your questions to deep 7 00:00:41,636 --> 00:00:45,636 Speaker 1: Cover at pushkin dot fm. That's deep Cover All one 8 00:00:45,716 --> 00:00:49,836 Speaker 1: word at Pushkin dot fm and stay tuned for more 9 00:00:49,876 --> 00:00:54,076 Speaker 1: details on this event heads up. In this episode, there 10 00:00:54,116 --> 00:00:58,196 Speaker 1: are references to suicidal ideation and sexual abuse. 11 00:01:00,636 --> 00:01:06,436 Speaker 2: Previously on Deep Cover. The chief of VA Police called me. 12 00:01:07,996 --> 00:01:11,076 Speaker 3: And said, hey, you know, I think we might have 13 00:01:11,116 --> 00:01:13,036 Speaker 3: a problem with an employee. 14 00:01:13,916 --> 00:01:17,316 Speaker 4: What immediately occurred to me was that as soon as 15 00:01:17,316 --> 00:01:21,156 Speaker 4: I told her I'd cancer, even though she was telling 16 00:01:21,196 --> 00:01:22,636 Speaker 4: me it was okay, in the back of her mind 17 00:01:22,676 --> 00:01:24,676 Speaker 4: she was thinking, I can take advantage of this. 18 00:01:25,796 --> 00:01:30,356 Speaker 2: Do you realize that Sarah used to bill one of 19 00:01:30,356 --> 00:01:33,916 Speaker 2: your mother's bills from Dana Farmer? And I said no, 20 00:01:33,996 --> 00:01:34,996 Speaker 2: I didn't realize that. 21 00:01:35,276 --> 00:01:36,036 Speaker 4: I didn't know that. 22 00:01:37,396 --> 00:01:40,716 Speaker 3: I was so afraid, right, I was so so afraid, 23 00:01:40,956 --> 00:01:43,316 Speaker 3: not because I thought it was illegal, not because I'm 24 00:01:43,316 --> 00:01:45,596 Speaker 3: thinking I'm going to go to prison, but because I'm like, 25 00:01:47,116 --> 00:01:50,396 Speaker 3: they are not going to be my friends anymore. I'm 26 00:01:50,396 --> 00:01:51,796 Speaker 3: not going to have these people in my life. 27 00:01:54,916 --> 00:01:59,676 Speaker 1: One detail that's often overlooked in this story, Sarah Kavanaugh 28 00:01:59,956 --> 00:02:03,436 Speaker 1: was married. She had a wife, a woman named Nicole. 29 00:02:05,076 --> 00:02:08,316 Speaker 5: For us, Nicole was kind of the black box in 30 00:02:08,356 --> 00:02:11,756 Speaker 5: this story, the person who might hold the key to 31 00:02:11,916 --> 00:02:16,396 Speaker 5: understanding Sarah, because no matter who Sarah pretended to be 32 00:02:16,596 --> 00:02:19,916 Speaker 5: in public, she was coming home to Nicole most nights, 33 00:02:20,436 --> 00:02:23,276 Speaker 5: to the cozy little house they shared in East Granwitch 34 00:02:23,316 --> 00:02:27,956 Speaker 5: Trode Island. It's a charming cape with a steep gabled 35 00:02:28,036 --> 00:02:32,036 Speaker 5: roof and dormer windows and the flowering dogwood in the 36 00:02:32,076 --> 00:02:32,676 Speaker 5: front yard. 37 00:02:34,476 --> 00:02:38,556 Speaker 1: And we wondered what went on in that home, What 38 00:02:38,596 --> 00:02:43,116 Speaker 1: did Nicole know, when did she know it? And did 39 00:02:43,156 --> 00:02:45,796 Speaker 1: she see a side of Sarah that the rest of 40 00:02:45,836 --> 00:02:46,636 Speaker 1: the world didn't. 41 00:02:47,796 --> 00:02:51,756 Speaker 5: Nicole is an intensely private person. She never talked to 42 00:02:51,796 --> 00:02:57,396 Speaker 5: the press or investigators, never made a statement, just kept quiet. 43 00:02:57,676 --> 00:03:02,076 Speaker 5: We wrote her letter, and to our surprise, she called 44 00:03:02,156 --> 00:03:05,276 Speaker 5: us and invited us to her house for an interview. 45 00:03:05,956 --> 00:03:09,876 Speaker 1: When we met, I did something I don't usually do. 46 00:03:10,836 --> 00:03:14,756 Speaker 1: I just asked her, Why did you agree to talk 47 00:03:14,796 --> 00:03:15,156 Speaker 1: to us? 48 00:03:15,316 --> 00:03:19,596 Speaker 6: Yeah, I asked myself that question several times before I 49 00:03:19,756 --> 00:03:22,796 Speaker 6: called you. I know a lot of people are curious, 50 00:03:22,836 --> 00:03:26,036 Speaker 6: and I don't have an obligation to share, but I 51 00:03:26,076 --> 00:03:28,836 Speaker 6: do think that it means something to me that the 52 00:03:28,876 --> 00:03:32,756 Speaker 6: story is told in whole, in full, and not part way. 53 00:03:34,396 --> 00:03:36,916 Speaker 5: We're going to take a deep dive into Sarah and 54 00:03:36,996 --> 00:03:42,516 Speaker 5: Nichole's house, the place where their lives converged, and the pats. 55 00:03:42,116 --> 00:03:43,516 Speaker 2: They both took to get there. 56 00:03:44,476 --> 00:03:49,476 Speaker 5: Sarah's path was fraught, complicated, and full of hidden struggles, 57 00:03:50,036 --> 00:03:55,316 Speaker 5: struggles that would re emerge and eventually lead to the 58 00:03:55,356 --> 00:03:59,596 Speaker 5: moment when federal agents came knocking. 59 00:04:00,476 --> 00:04:03,116 Speaker 6: Picked up the phone just to check my messages, and 60 00:04:03,236 --> 00:04:05,796 Speaker 6: that she said, you need to come home. The FBI 61 00:04:05,876 --> 00:04:08,796 Speaker 6: is here. That's when I knew it was that fast. 62 00:04:08,836 --> 00:04:10,756 Speaker 6: I had nothing until I had that. 63 00:04:26,036 --> 00:04:30,556 Speaker 1: I'm Jake Halper and I'm Jess Mchughe and this is 64 00:04:30,676 --> 00:04:51,156 Speaker 1: Deep Cover, Season six, The Truth About Sarah Episode five, 65 00:04:52,796 --> 00:04:53,676 Speaker 1: The Wife. 66 00:05:01,316 --> 00:05:04,596 Speaker 5: Or interview with Nicole came with a disclaimer. 67 00:05:05,156 --> 00:05:07,636 Speaker 6: There's a lot of things that I frankly, I just 68 00:05:07,636 --> 00:05:11,196 Speaker 6: don't know if what I was told or what I 69 00:05:11,276 --> 00:05:16,716 Speaker 6: know is even true. So I can definitely speak to 70 00:05:16,756 --> 00:05:18,996 Speaker 6: my perspective on things of what I understood to be 71 00:05:19,036 --> 00:05:23,436 Speaker 6: true at the time that I was living in But 72 00:05:23,596 --> 00:05:25,676 Speaker 6: I have found out along the way that there are 73 00:05:25,716 --> 00:05:29,116 Speaker 6: things that I thought were true that just aren't. 74 00:05:29,676 --> 00:05:32,796 Speaker 5: It struck me that she was basically questioning her own 75 00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:37,556 Speaker 5: perception of reality, and this we came to learn is 76 00:05:37,556 --> 00:05:43,476 Speaker 5: where Nicole's mind still is still spinning, still grasping for 77 00:05:43,596 --> 00:05:47,516 Speaker 5: traction on the solid truth we told her we get it. 78 00:05:48,356 --> 00:05:50,316 Speaker 5: Let's start from the beginning. 79 00:05:51,996 --> 00:05:54,596 Speaker 1: Nicole grew up in New Mexico, but moved to New 80 00:05:54,636 --> 00:05:58,876 Speaker 1: England in her late twenties. She's out doorsy, just like Sarah. 81 00:05:59,036 --> 00:06:01,676 Speaker 1: So when the two of them connected online, one of 82 00:06:01,716 --> 00:06:05,956 Speaker 1: their first dates was a hike. They met at Lincoln Woods, 83 00:06:06,396 --> 00:06:11,116 Speaker 1: a park with rugged hills, treeline train and a tranquil pond. 84 00:06:12,276 --> 00:06:14,356 Speaker 6: I just remember it being falling, you know, the leaves 85 00:06:14,396 --> 00:06:17,276 Speaker 6: here in the fall are gorgeous, and it was nice 86 00:06:17,316 --> 00:06:19,756 Speaker 6: out that day, and she and I always just had 87 00:06:19,836 --> 00:06:24,756 Speaker 6: really good conversation and connection. It was easy. She's very 88 00:06:24,756 --> 00:06:28,916 Speaker 6: easy to talk to, you know, just made you feel 89 00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:30,156 Speaker 6: like you're the only person there. 90 00:06:31,356 --> 00:06:34,916 Speaker 1: Nicole says, Sarah was just very in tune. Those were 91 00:06:34,956 --> 00:06:39,436 Speaker 1: her words. Sarah presented herself to Nicole as a native 92 00:06:39,476 --> 00:06:43,436 Speaker 1: New Englander with a brother and two divorced parents. All true. 93 00:06:43,436 --> 00:06:45,836 Speaker 1: By the way. She said she worked as a mental 94 00:06:45,836 --> 00:06:49,836 Speaker 1: health professional, also true. 95 00:06:48,956 --> 00:06:51,956 Speaker 6: So I understood that she was a basically a social 96 00:06:51,996 --> 00:06:53,796 Speaker 6: worker at the via got it. 97 00:06:54,196 --> 00:06:56,316 Speaker 5: And at that point did she tell you that she 98 00:06:56,436 --> 00:06:57,916 Speaker 5: was a veteran or No? 99 00:06:57,916 --> 00:07:00,116 Speaker 6: No, she never told me she was a veteran. Not ever. 100 00:07:01,556 --> 00:07:05,316 Speaker 5: Sarah and Nicole became close quickly, and after about a 101 00:07:05,356 --> 00:07:08,676 Speaker 5: year or so, they bought a home together that cozy 102 00:07:08,716 --> 00:07:12,996 Speaker 5: little I told you about in East Greenwich. Nicole says 103 00:07:13,076 --> 00:07:15,956 Speaker 5: that moving in was a big deal and that Sarah 104 00:07:16,076 --> 00:07:17,556 Speaker 5: had certain expectations. 105 00:07:18,436 --> 00:07:20,636 Speaker 6: One thing that she was big on was she didn't 106 00:07:20,636 --> 00:07:25,076 Speaker 6: want to be roommates forever, which can happen to people, 107 00:07:25,156 --> 00:07:28,676 Speaker 6: especially same sex couples. And she was like very adamant 108 00:07:29,076 --> 00:07:32,556 Speaker 6: that she didn't want that kind of relationship. She wanted 109 00:07:32,556 --> 00:07:36,036 Speaker 6: a committed love relationship, not roommate relationship. 110 00:07:37,196 --> 00:07:40,476 Speaker 5: So on their first night in their new home, Nicole 111 00:07:40,556 --> 00:07:43,116 Speaker 5: had a little surprise waiting for Sarah. 112 00:07:43,356 --> 00:07:47,796 Speaker 6: I had her like take a bath, and then I 113 00:07:47,956 --> 00:07:49,996 Speaker 6: put out a bunch of candles leading to the back 114 00:07:50,036 --> 00:07:52,876 Speaker 6: deck and roses. So when she got out of the bath, 115 00:07:53,476 --> 00:07:56,596 Speaker 6: I led her downstairs, so she was all relaxed and 116 00:07:56,636 --> 00:07:59,876 Speaker 6: comfy and proposed at the house on the first day 117 00:07:59,876 --> 00:08:01,756 Speaker 6: that we moved in, so we didn't spend any night 118 00:08:01,796 --> 00:08:03,436 Speaker 6: in that house that we weren't engaged. 119 00:08:04,596 --> 00:08:07,916 Speaker 5: A year later, they got married in Vermont. You may 120 00:08:07,996 --> 00:08:12,836 Speaker 5: recall Sarah's Jim Buddies helped arrange the wedding. Red barn birch, 121 00:08:12,876 --> 00:08:18,876 Speaker 5: pergola flowers and maple syrup buckets, the whole Eddie Bauer vibe. 122 00:08:19,036 --> 00:08:22,596 Speaker 1: The pictures from that day are radiant. Nicole in her 123 00:08:22,596 --> 00:08:26,516 Speaker 1: crisp white dress, looks lovingly at Sarah and her soft 124 00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:30,836 Speaker 1: ivory gown. In one shot, they waved at the camera playfully. 125 00:08:31,396 --> 00:08:34,956 Speaker 1: In another, they sway together on the dance floor, arms 126 00:08:34,996 --> 00:08:38,556 Speaker 1: around each other with the warmth of summer light casting 127 00:08:38,636 --> 00:08:51,836 Speaker 1: soft shadows. Sarah and Nicole were now a married couple, 128 00:08:52,516 --> 00:08:57,196 Speaker 1: but according to Nicole, they continued to live independent lives. 129 00:08:57,956 --> 00:09:01,836 Speaker 1: They had different hobbies and different friend groups. Nicole was 130 00:09:01,836 --> 00:09:05,196 Speaker 1: into softball and was in a serious travel league, off 131 00:09:05,236 --> 00:09:08,916 Speaker 1: and away on the weekends, and Sarah was working for 132 00:09:09,156 --> 00:09:13,356 Speaker 1: veteran organizations and had to travel for that. At least 133 00:09:13,596 --> 00:09:18,716 Speaker 1: that's what she told Nicole, and yet living independent lives 134 00:09:19,116 --> 00:09:22,956 Speaker 1: seemed to work for them. This doesn't seem totally weird 135 00:09:22,956 --> 00:09:25,436 Speaker 1: to me, by the way. I've been together with my 136 00:09:25,556 --> 00:09:28,236 Speaker 1: wife for twenty eight years, and one of the main 137 00:09:28,316 --> 00:09:31,196 Speaker 1: reasons our marriage still works is that we know how 138 00:09:31,196 --> 00:09:34,276 Speaker 1: to give each other space. We have our own interests, 139 00:09:34,556 --> 00:09:39,196 Speaker 1: our own realms. But let's face it, marriages are rarely 140 00:09:39,236 --> 00:09:42,796 Speaker 1: as tidy as we imagine. They're messy by nature, and 141 00:09:42,836 --> 00:09:46,476 Speaker 1: no one stays perfectly within their own lanes, especially when 142 00:09:46,596 --> 00:09:50,476 Speaker 1: children enter the picture. And for Sarah and Nicole, it 143 00:09:50,676 --> 00:09:55,476 Speaker 1: was precisely this issue children that forced some very hard choices. 144 00:09:58,356 --> 00:10:01,276 Speaker 5: Nicole told us that she and Sarah had been planning 145 00:10:01,356 --> 00:10:05,836 Speaker 5: to have kids, but then about two years after their wedding, 146 00:10:06,756 --> 00:10:09,876 Speaker 5: things took a turn. Sarah came up home and told 147 00:10:09,956 --> 00:10:15,476 Speaker 5: Nicole she had brain cancer, which is horrible, right catastrophic, 148 00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:20,596 Speaker 5: but initially it wasn't. Actually the doctor said it was treatable. 149 00:10:21,516 --> 00:10:25,436 Speaker 5: Nicole heard all of this, by the way, secondhand from Sarah. 150 00:10:26,036 --> 00:10:29,796 Speaker 5: She didn't attend any of the oncology appointments. Since Sarah 151 00:10:29,876 --> 00:10:33,556 Speaker 5: had been diagnosed during COVID, when patients were generally going 152 00:10:33,596 --> 00:10:37,676 Speaker 5: to the hospital alone. Nicole says that Sarah tried to 153 00:10:37,756 --> 00:10:41,396 Speaker 5: keep things upbeat. They nicknamed the tumor her brain buddy, 154 00:10:41,996 --> 00:10:45,436 Speaker 5: and apparently the buddy didn't seem to be getting any bigger. 155 00:10:46,036 --> 00:10:48,996 Speaker 5: So despite the bad news, they pressed ahead with their 156 00:10:49,036 --> 00:10:50,996 Speaker 5: plans to have a baby. 157 00:10:51,116 --> 00:10:54,316 Speaker 6: We were gonna like do in vitro fertilization and I 158 00:10:54,396 --> 00:10:56,276 Speaker 6: was going to carry. I had been to the doctor 159 00:10:56,356 --> 00:11:00,196 Speaker 6: several times, like I'd been through some procedures. They're checking out, 160 00:11:00,436 --> 00:11:03,636 Speaker 6: you know, my system here to make sure that we 161 00:11:03,636 --> 00:11:08,796 Speaker 6: were good to go. So I had a doctor's appointment 162 00:11:10,036 --> 00:11:11,276 Speaker 6: that I was going to go to, which would have 163 00:11:11,316 --> 00:11:14,676 Speaker 6: been the final like sign off before the actual event. 164 00:11:15,356 --> 00:11:19,436 Speaker 6: So I remember the day before the appointment, she said, 165 00:11:20,716 --> 00:11:23,556 Speaker 6: I think you should pause on the appointment because I 166 00:11:23,556 --> 00:11:25,276 Speaker 6: have this doctor's appointment and I don't know if it's 167 00:11:25,316 --> 00:11:28,396 Speaker 6: going to go well. And I was like, okay, what's 168 00:11:28,436 --> 00:11:31,116 Speaker 6: going on. She made it sound like that we need 169 00:11:31,116 --> 00:11:32,996 Speaker 6: to wait because this might be really serious. 170 00:11:34,396 --> 00:11:37,956 Speaker 5: Soon after this, Sarah tells Nicole that the cancer has 171 00:11:37,996 --> 00:11:42,876 Speaker 5: gotten much worse, possibly terminal, which changed everything. 172 00:11:44,516 --> 00:11:46,716 Speaker 6: It flips into you know, you take care of your 173 00:11:46,756 --> 00:11:49,836 Speaker 6: significant other, like now, I'm just like that's on pause 174 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:52,596 Speaker 6: and okay, we can pick that up later. What's going 175 00:11:52,636 --> 00:11:53,036 Speaker 6: on with you? 176 00:11:54,196 --> 00:11:57,396 Speaker 5: Their plans to expand their family were put on hold. 177 00:11:58,236 --> 00:12:01,756 Speaker 5: Nicole pursued a promotion at work, thinking the extra money 178 00:12:01,796 --> 00:12:06,476 Speaker 5: would help as the medical bills piled up. Meanwhile, Sarah 179 00:12:06,556 --> 00:12:10,796 Speaker 5: arranged for in home support from a specialist trained to 180 00:12:10,836 --> 00:12:14,556 Speaker 5: work with people with traumatic brain injuries, someone who came 181 00:12:14,636 --> 00:12:18,636 Speaker 5: multiple times a week. What Nicole didn't know was that 182 00:12:18,676 --> 00:12:22,596 Speaker 5: the Wounded Warrior Project was paying for this. I interviewed 183 00:12:22,596 --> 00:12:27,556 Speaker 5: that person, the specialist she helped Sarah for years, thinking 184 00:12:27,636 --> 00:12:31,276 Speaker 5: Sarah had a brain injury while also battling cancer. 185 00:12:32,876 --> 00:12:34,316 Speaker 2: But even while taking. 186 00:12:34,036 --> 00:12:37,996 Speaker 5: This help, she still kept her wife Nicole, at a distance. 187 00:12:39,156 --> 00:12:43,796 Speaker 6: She didn't involve me, Like, she wouldn't involve me, She 188 00:12:43,836 --> 00:12:45,956 Speaker 6: wouldn't lean on me. She was like, I do this 189 00:12:45,996 --> 00:12:47,756 Speaker 6: on my own. I don't want you to worry about it. 190 00:12:48,196 --> 00:12:51,036 Speaker 6: Anytime I tried to talk with her about it, She's 191 00:12:51,156 --> 00:12:53,316 Speaker 6: just like, I can't, I don't want to talk about it. 192 00:12:53,596 --> 00:12:56,956 Speaker 6: So it was very it was something that separated us. 193 00:12:56,996 --> 00:12:58,916 Speaker 6: She didn't lean into me, she leaned away. 194 00:13:00,196 --> 00:13:03,956 Speaker 5: When it came time for Sarah's doctor's appointments. Even after 195 00:13:04,076 --> 00:13:09,076 Speaker 5: COVID restrictions were lifted, Sarah was explicit she didn't want 196 00:13:09,116 --> 00:13:13,076 Speaker 5: I want Nicole to be there. Nicole says she was hurt, 197 00:13:13,516 --> 00:13:15,636 Speaker 5: but she didn't really feel like she had the right 198 00:13:15,676 --> 00:13:17,036 Speaker 5: to express her frustration. 199 00:13:18,876 --> 00:13:21,796 Speaker 6: Are you gonna blame the spouse with cancer? Like, what 200 00:13:21,836 --> 00:13:25,436 Speaker 6: do you you know is she's having a hard time 201 00:13:26,196 --> 00:13:31,196 Speaker 6: coping with it and is choosing to withdraw, Then you 202 00:13:31,236 --> 00:13:34,676 Speaker 6: know that's it's kind I chopped it up to that, like, 203 00:13:34,956 --> 00:13:37,476 Speaker 6: when she's ready for me to support her, she'll allow 204 00:13:37,556 --> 00:13:39,236 Speaker 6: me to support her, and I'm just going to keep 205 00:13:39,276 --> 00:13:43,276 Speaker 6: being here until she's ready. That's how I rationalized it. 206 00:13:45,676 --> 00:13:49,156 Speaker 1: What Nicole didn't know at the time was that, of course, 207 00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:52,756 Speaker 1: Sarah was living a double life. When she traveled for 208 00:13:52,876 --> 00:13:57,276 Speaker 1: veteran events, she was sometimes attending all expense paid retreats 209 00:13:57,596 --> 00:14:00,396 Speaker 1: posing as a war hero. When she was out with 210 00:14:00,436 --> 00:14:03,316 Speaker 1: her veteran buddies, she was playing the role of the 211 00:14:03,396 --> 00:14:07,076 Speaker 1: VFW commander, And when she went away on her own 212 00:14:07,716 --> 00:14:11,876 Speaker 1: sometimes she was actually with Sam, the physical therapist whom 213 00:14:11,956 --> 00:14:16,596 Speaker 1: she'd become romantically involved with. The whole thing was bound 214 00:14:16,636 --> 00:14:38,916 Speaker 1: to unravel and then one day it did. When Nicole 215 00:14:39,036 --> 00:14:42,716 Speaker 1: got the call, the call that the FBI was at 216 00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:46,036 Speaker 1: her house, she hopped in her car and rushed home. 217 00:14:47,156 --> 00:14:52,436 Speaker 6: There was a ton of black SUVs and a ambulance 218 00:14:52,596 --> 00:14:57,676 Speaker 6: and cop cars and all kinds of vehicles in the road, 219 00:14:57,756 --> 00:14:59,316 Speaker 6: So I like park down the street. You have to 220 00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:01,876 Speaker 6: do like a walk of shame to get to my house. 221 00:15:01,956 --> 00:15:03,956 Speaker 6: Everybody's like looking, and I'm like, I don't know, guys, 222 00:15:03,996 --> 00:15:04,916 Speaker 6: I don't know what's happening. 223 00:15:06,356 --> 00:15:10,156 Speaker 5: Nicole arrived home to find an FBI agents her doorstep. 224 00:15:10,836 --> 00:15:14,316 Speaker 5: The agent explained that Sarah had threatened to harm herself 225 00:15:14,716 --> 00:15:17,756 Speaker 5: and needed to be taken to the hospital, but Sarah 226 00:15:17,796 --> 00:15:22,556 Speaker 5: had refused to go without Nicole, so Nicole hopped back 227 00:15:22,596 --> 00:15:25,436 Speaker 5: in her car and followed the ambulance to the hospital. 228 00:15:26,476 --> 00:15:29,356 Speaker 6: It doesn't matter what else is happening in that moment. 229 00:15:29,476 --> 00:15:31,956 Speaker 6: I don't really know, but I'll get the facts whatever. 230 00:15:31,996 --> 00:15:34,636 Speaker 6: I'll get home later and we'll figure it out. You 231 00:15:34,756 --> 00:15:37,836 Speaker 6: just go into like take care of your significant other mode. 232 00:15:38,356 --> 00:15:41,716 Speaker 6: The most important thing is, like she's getting into an ambulance, 233 00:15:41,756 --> 00:15:42,356 Speaker 6: I'm gonna go. 234 00:15:43,636 --> 00:15:47,036 Speaker 5: After a long way to the hospital, they cleared Sarah, 235 00:15:47,436 --> 00:15:52,436 Speaker 5: determining she wasn't an immediate danger to herself. Sarah was 236 00:15:52,476 --> 00:15:55,916 Speaker 5: allowed to leave the coal and the two returned home 237 00:15:55,996 --> 00:15:57,836 Speaker 5: together in Nicole's car. 238 00:15:59,436 --> 00:16:06,516 Speaker 6: It was silent. It was just silent. I said, what's 239 00:16:06,556 --> 00:16:09,956 Speaker 6: going on? It was quiet for a long time. I 240 00:16:10,076 --> 00:16:12,316 Speaker 6: just waited for her to answer. I don't have answers. 241 00:16:12,396 --> 00:16:13,716 Speaker 6: I'll wait until you answer. 242 00:16:14,796 --> 00:16:19,636 Speaker 5: Eventually, Sarah vaguely admitted to lying about some things mentioned 243 00:16:19,716 --> 00:16:23,276 Speaker 5: she might be in trouble. Understatement of the century. By 244 00:16:23,276 --> 00:16:25,676 Speaker 5: the way Nicole's head was spinning. 245 00:16:27,396 --> 00:16:31,116 Speaker 6: I'm trying to be gentle in the way of you 246 00:16:31,236 --> 00:16:33,996 Speaker 6: have somebody who's struggling with some mental health stuff in 247 00:16:33,996 --> 00:16:37,876 Speaker 6: this moment right now, but I also need to know 248 00:16:37,916 --> 00:16:40,436 Speaker 6: what's going on, and I need her to talk to me. 249 00:16:40,756 --> 00:16:43,236 Speaker 6: I said directly to her, do you have cancer? And 250 00:16:43,276 --> 00:16:51,676 Speaker 6: she said yes, and I was like okay. 251 00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:58,516 Speaker 1: When they arrived back home, the cop cars are all gone. 252 00:16:58,796 --> 00:17:02,196 Speaker 1: The neighbors are back in their homes and their quiet 253 00:17:02,276 --> 00:17:06,316 Speaker 1: New England Street is once again a quiet New England Street. 254 00:17:08,516 --> 00:17:11,636 Speaker 6: We walk in the house is a disaster. The drawers 255 00:17:11,636 --> 00:17:14,636 Speaker 6: are all pulled out and things are knocked over and 256 00:17:14,676 --> 00:17:17,356 Speaker 6: things like that. They didn't break anything, but it's a mess, 257 00:17:17,996 --> 00:17:21,716 Speaker 6: and we didn't keep our house messy. So it's like 258 00:17:22,076 --> 00:17:22,756 Speaker 6: was startling. 259 00:17:24,036 --> 00:17:27,836 Speaker 1: As they're picking up the mess, Nicole's mind keeps returning 260 00:17:27,876 --> 00:17:31,796 Speaker 1: to the cancer because if there's one thing that she 261 00:17:31,996 --> 00:17:35,396 Speaker 1: needs to be true, it's that It's why she took 262 00:17:35,436 --> 00:17:38,956 Speaker 1: the promotion, worked the extra hours, built up their savings, 263 00:17:39,676 --> 00:17:42,476 Speaker 1: and it was the cancer that in a way helped 264 00:17:42,516 --> 00:17:45,916 Speaker 1: explain why Sarah had been struggling so much, why she'd 265 00:17:45,956 --> 00:17:49,756 Speaker 1: been so distant, and most of all, it was the 266 00:17:49,796 --> 00:17:53,396 Speaker 1: cancer that prompted them to postpone their plans to have kids. 267 00:17:54,036 --> 00:17:57,916 Speaker 1: And so as they're cleaning up, she asks Sarah again 268 00:17:58,156 --> 00:18:03,916 Speaker 1: about the cancer, and once more Sarah insists, yes, it's true. 269 00:18:05,236 --> 00:18:09,316 Speaker 1: But Nicole, she can't let it go, this question. It 270 00:18:09,436 --> 00:18:11,156 Speaker 1: plays on her exhausted mind. 271 00:18:12,236 --> 00:18:16,356 Speaker 6: So then we laid down to sleep that night, and 272 00:18:18,196 --> 00:18:20,556 Speaker 6: in the dark, laying laying in bed in the dark, 273 00:18:20,636 --> 00:18:23,636 Speaker 6: kind of like pillow tongue, I asked her one more time, 274 00:18:24,076 --> 00:18:25,556 Speaker 6: do you have cancer? 275 00:18:27,436 --> 00:18:32,796 Speaker 1: And then she just waited, somehow sensing that maybe under 276 00:18:32,836 --> 00:18:38,996 Speaker 1: the cover of darkness the truth might finally emerge. 277 00:18:44,196 --> 00:18:47,676 Speaker 5: One of the many questions that we had was how 278 00:18:47,716 --> 00:18:51,116 Speaker 5: did Sarah get to this moment? Lying in her bed 279 00:18:51,676 --> 00:18:55,556 Speaker 5: in the dark, next to her spouse, being asked this 280 00:18:55,796 --> 00:19:00,916 Speaker 5: terrifyingly simple question, have you been lying to me about 281 00:19:00,916 --> 00:19:05,476 Speaker 5: having cancer? In order to understand how she got here 282 00:19:06,076 --> 00:19:09,756 Speaker 5: to this moment, we actually have to go back too 283 00:19:09,836 --> 00:19:13,676 Speaker 5: much earlier in Sarah's story, because the way Sarah sees it, 284 00:19:14,316 --> 00:19:18,036 Speaker 5: her double life wasn't initially Sarah the social worker and 285 00:19:18,076 --> 00:19:22,676 Speaker 5: Sarah the war hero. Her first double life began as 286 00:19:22,676 --> 00:19:23,316 Speaker 5: a little girl. 287 00:19:24,436 --> 00:19:27,316 Speaker 3: I think this feeling of like always wanting a different 288 00:19:27,356 --> 00:19:30,276 Speaker 3: life had been really persistent for me for some time, 289 00:19:30,556 --> 00:19:32,836 Speaker 3: or for most of my life. 290 00:19:33,076 --> 00:19:36,996 Speaker 1: Sarah admits she lied a lot growing up about all 291 00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:40,676 Speaker 1: kinds of things. At first, some of the lies we 292 00:19:40,716 --> 00:19:43,676 Speaker 1: heard about seemed to us like they'd fall in the 293 00:19:43,716 --> 00:19:47,276 Speaker 1: category of just stuff that kids do. She'd tell her 294 00:19:47,276 --> 00:19:50,516 Speaker 1: parents she was at school when she wasn't. Sometimes she'd 295 00:19:50,516 --> 00:19:53,916 Speaker 1: lie to other kids. We spoke to her best friend. 296 00:19:54,276 --> 00:19:57,836 Speaker 1: Her name is Ariel. They met as teenagers and the 297 00:19:57,876 --> 00:20:01,476 Speaker 1: two of them remain very close. Ariel gave us a 298 00:20:01,516 --> 00:20:06,116 Speaker 1: window into Sarah's world back in high school. Ariol remembers 299 00:20:06,156 --> 00:20:10,116 Speaker 1: Sarah spinning wise, that didn't even it really makes sense, 300 00:20:10,836 --> 00:20:13,436 Speaker 1: Like when Sarah would tell people that she was adopted. 301 00:20:13,996 --> 00:20:17,236 Speaker 1: According to Ariel, Sarah's mom called her out on this, 302 00:20:17,556 --> 00:20:21,916 Speaker 1: saying stop it, You're not adopted, but Sarah would keep 303 00:20:21,916 --> 00:20:26,036 Speaker 1: on saying it. Ariel always found this strange and never 304 00:20:26,076 --> 00:20:27,876 Speaker 1: quite understood why Sarah did it. 305 00:20:28,836 --> 00:20:32,716 Speaker 5: But as we dug deeper into Sarah's story, we uncovered 306 00:20:32,796 --> 00:20:36,156 Speaker 5: another set of lies that she told as a teenager 307 00:20:36,796 --> 00:20:43,756 Speaker 5: that did seem out of the ordinary. We tracked down 308 00:20:43,796 --> 00:20:46,956 Speaker 5: a few other people who knew Sarah back then. They 309 00:20:46,996 --> 00:20:50,676 Speaker 5: told us that they knew Sarah not as a new Englander, 310 00:20:51,316 --> 00:20:55,076 Speaker 5: but as a Southern girl, and more specifically as a 311 00:20:55,156 --> 00:21:00,036 Speaker 5: victim of Hurricane Katrina. This was just after that hurricane, 312 00:21:00,236 --> 00:21:04,156 Speaker 5: so it was still really fresh in people's minds. Sympathy 313 00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:09,676 Speaker 5: for Katrina victims was running high. Our sources said that 314 00:21:09,716 --> 00:21:14,196 Speaker 5: Sarah talked in detail about the ordeal of surviving Katrina. 315 00:21:15,036 --> 00:21:17,876 Speaker 5: Told people she was rescued from the roof of her 316 00:21:17,916 --> 00:21:23,716 Speaker 5: house just barely made it out alive. Apparently, Sarah told 317 00:21:23,756 --> 00:21:28,076 Speaker 5: some people that her father died during the flooding. These 318 00:21:28,116 --> 00:21:35,036 Speaker 5: lies earned her sympathy and friendship. To me, it seems 319 00:21:35,076 --> 00:21:38,556 Speaker 5: like a test run of what she'd do with veterans, 320 00:21:39,076 --> 00:21:41,356 Speaker 5: and that happened ten years prior. 321 00:21:42,996 --> 00:21:43,916 Speaker 2: I asked Sarah. 322 00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:46,436 Speaker 5: About all this, by the way, and she denied it. 323 00:21:46,996 --> 00:21:50,836 Speaker 5: Told me I never told people that. I don't know 324 00:21:50,916 --> 00:21:51,716 Speaker 5: why they think that. 325 00:21:57,236 --> 00:22:00,036 Speaker 1: Sarah told us that things happened to her as a 326 00:22:00,116 --> 00:22:03,356 Speaker 1: child that made her want to live a different life, 327 00:22:03,756 --> 00:22:08,596 Speaker 1: be someone else, lie escape. 328 00:22:08,756 --> 00:22:12,556 Speaker 3: When you lived two separate lives for so long, it 329 00:22:12,596 --> 00:22:15,476 Speaker 3: feels normal, right. I had to be someone else in 330 00:22:15,476 --> 00:22:17,436 Speaker 3: front of other people when I was a child, and 331 00:22:18,556 --> 00:22:19,236 Speaker 3: that was normal. 332 00:22:20,316 --> 00:22:23,156 Speaker 1: Sarah says that there was a man who sexually abused 333 00:22:23,156 --> 00:22:26,956 Speaker 1: her for years when she was a girl. Her mother 334 00:22:27,076 --> 00:22:32,076 Speaker 1: attested to this in official documents. Nicole also confirmed us 335 00:22:32,236 --> 00:22:35,756 Speaker 1: that this abuse was something that Sarah had shared with her. 336 00:22:36,476 --> 00:22:40,516 Speaker 5: According to Sarah, this abuse kind of split her life 337 00:22:40,556 --> 00:22:40,916 Speaker 5: in two. 338 00:22:42,036 --> 00:22:43,796 Speaker 3: When I go to school, I'm able to just like 339 00:22:44,116 --> 00:22:47,556 Speaker 3: excel and act like everything is fine, and play a 340 00:22:47,596 --> 00:22:49,876 Speaker 3: sport and play an instrument and do all of these things. 341 00:22:49,916 --> 00:22:53,836 Speaker 3: And no one knew anything was going on for a 342 00:22:53,996 --> 00:22:54,836 Speaker 3: very long time. 343 00:22:56,596 --> 00:22:59,636 Speaker 5: That included her high school friend Ariel, who he told 344 00:22:59,676 --> 00:23:03,076 Speaker 5: you about. Ariel says she had no idea that Sarah 345 00:23:03,156 --> 00:23:08,236 Speaker 5: had been sexually abused. To Ariel, Sarah came across as 346 00:23:08,316 --> 00:23:12,876 Speaker 5: funny and friendly, always up for an adventure. She played 347 00:23:12,876 --> 00:23:16,116 Speaker 5: on the high school's basketball team. She was openly gay, 348 00:23:16,756 --> 00:23:19,596 Speaker 5: and she even helped Ariol come out of the closet herself. 349 00:23:20,596 --> 00:23:25,196 Speaker 5: She seemed so confident, but Sarah says the truth is 350 00:23:26,116 --> 00:23:27,116 Speaker 5: she was unraveling. 351 00:23:28,316 --> 00:23:30,436 Speaker 3: It began to drink really young. I was like thirteen 352 00:23:30,476 --> 00:23:37,076 Speaker 3: when I started drinking. I definitely overused alcohol right and 353 00:23:38,636 --> 00:23:42,276 Speaker 3: when I started to get into therapy finally, when I 354 00:23:42,316 --> 00:23:48,156 Speaker 3: was like fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, my symptoms were really really 355 00:23:49,116 --> 00:23:51,836 Speaker 3: like I could barely get through school certain days, or. 356 00:23:53,236 --> 00:23:54,036 Speaker 2: I would just leave. 357 00:23:55,436 --> 00:23:58,756 Speaker 5: At first, things seemed to get somewhat better. When Sarah 358 00:23:58,756 --> 00:24:01,796 Speaker 5: got to college. She was stable enough that she was 359 00:24:01,836 --> 00:24:05,596 Speaker 5: able to help others. Her best friend Ariol had ended 360 00:24:05,676 --> 00:24:09,596 Speaker 5: up homeless, and Sarah was the one to say, come 361 00:24:09,676 --> 00:24:12,876 Speaker 5: live with me. She even let Ariol sleep on her 362 00:24:12,876 --> 00:24:17,196 Speaker 5: couch for a whole year. To this day, Ariel is 363 00:24:17,356 --> 00:24:23,356 Speaker 5: deeply grateful and loyal to Sarah, and sure Sarah was 364 00:24:23,396 --> 00:24:27,556 Speaker 5: still drinking a lot, but wasn't everyone In college, I. 365 00:24:27,516 --> 00:24:29,236 Speaker 3: Thought I pretty much had an under control where I 366 00:24:29,276 --> 00:24:32,156 Speaker 3: was going to school, I had an apartment. Things felt okay, 367 00:24:32,556 --> 00:24:32,876 Speaker 3: so to. 368 00:24:32,876 --> 00:24:37,556 Speaker 5: Speak, but then in her senior year of undergrad her 369 00:24:37,556 --> 00:24:38,716 Speaker 5: mental health took a turn. 370 00:24:39,756 --> 00:24:45,316 Speaker 3: I was hospitalized for a suicide attempt and then I 371 00:24:45,356 --> 00:24:47,756 Speaker 3: was referred to like this outpatient program at one of 372 00:24:47,756 --> 00:24:48,676 Speaker 3: the local hospitals. 373 00:24:50,076 --> 00:24:54,236 Speaker 1: Sarah started taking medications for her anxiety after this, and 374 00:24:54,316 --> 00:24:58,076 Speaker 1: she says she really evened doubt. But then her insurance 375 00:24:58,116 --> 00:25:01,876 Speaker 1: stopped covering her medical provider, so she went off her meds. 376 00:25:02,676 --> 00:25:05,196 Speaker 1: It was a rough time. She says that she tried 377 00:25:05,236 --> 00:25:09,396 Speaker 1: to take her own life on multiple occasions. All of 378 00:25:09,436 --> 00:25:12,876 Speaker 1: this is to say, Sarah told us she faced some 379 00:25:12,916 --> 00:25:16,156 Speaker 1: pretty difficult moments in her life from a young age. 380 00:25:17,916 --> 00:25:22,356 Speaker 5: Then in twenty sixteen, when Sarah was twenty five, two 381 00:25:22,396 --> 00:25:27,876 Speaker 5: things happened, two really important things. The first was that 382 00:25:27,916 --> 00:25:32,836 Speaker 5: she met Nicole, who would eventually become her wife. The 383 00:25:32,916 --> 00:25:37,516 Speaker 5: second was that in this same year, she joined the VFW, 384 00:25:38,316 --> 00:25:40,636 Speaker 5: where she found a community of veterans. 385 00:25:42,516 --> 00:25:45,876 Speaker 1: These two things, her wife and her veteran buddies would 386 00:25:45,916 --> 00:25:50,836 Speaker 1: become Sarah's pillars, her support, but they were also destined 387 00:25:50,836 --> 00:25:54,356 Speaker 1: to push against one another and create tension in a 388 00:25:54,396 --> 00:25:58,036 Speaker 1: way that would ultimately bring everything crashing down. 389 00:26:00,516 --> 00:26:04,356 Speaker 5: The community that Sarah found at the VFW seemed to 390 00:26:04,356 --> 00:26:08,676 Speaker 5: be so meaningful to her. She says everyone there seemed 391 00:26:08,716 --> 00:26:12,396 Speaker 5: to get that she was working through a trauma from her. 392 00:26:12,276 --> 00:26:15,996 Speaker 3: Past, like you don't have to hide like that you're 393 00:26:16,076 --> 00:26:20,036 Speaker 3: uncomfortable or that like people talking loudly or yelling makes 394 00:26:20,076 --> 00:26:22,436 Speaker 3: you feel like triggering, Like you don't have to hide 395 00:26:22,436 --> 00:26:24,996 Speaker 3: those things. Those are like socially acceptable for veterans. And 396 00:26:25,156 --> 00:26:26,996 Speaker 3: like I remember being out of work thing once in 397 00:26:27,156 --> 00:26:29,956 Speaker 3: like a colleague, like a male colleague, like coming in 398 00:26:29,996 --> 00:26:31,676 Speaker 3: for a hug and being like, oh my gosh, and 399 00:26:31,756 --> 00:26:36,316 Speaker 3: like awkwardly like turning and like my somebody I worked 400 00:26:36,316 --> 00:26:37,916 Speaker 3: with at the time, like being like are you okay 401 00:26:38,116 --> 00:26:41,076 Speaker 3: and being like, oh my god. That never happens to veterans. 402 00:26:41,756 --> 00:26:44,036 Speaker 3: It's like the socially accepted thing, Like we're not going 403 00:26:44,076 --> 00:26:46,036 Speaker 3: to question them. They have a good reason to be there. 404 00:26:48,316 --> 00:26:52,996 Speaker 1: What Sarah is describing here are symptoms of PTSD, which 405 00:26:53,316 --> 00:26:56,876 Speaker 1: she says stemmed from her trauma, the sexual abuse from 406 00:26:56,876 --> 00:27:00,916 Speaker 1: her past, and she says that veterans seem to understand 407 00:27:00,956 --> 00:27:04,636 Speaker 1: this kind of trauma innately, almost like it was part 408 00:27:04,676 --> 00:27:08,796 Speaker 1: of their shared memory and their unspoken language. She told 409 00:27:08,876 --> 00:27:12,636 Speaker 1: us she felt safe with them, like for once, no 410 00:27:12,676 --> 00:27:15,796 Speaker 1: one was judging her because they understood. 411 00:27:17,436 --> 00:27:23,276 Speaker 3: I think that I had kept a lot of secrets 412 00:27:23,316 --> 00:27:27,356 Speaker 3: in my life from my childhood, and so I don't 413 00:27:27,356 --> 00:27:29,636 Speaker 3: think I had ever let anybody really know who I was. 414 00:27:31,556 --> 00:27:31,956 Speaker 1: Out of. 415 00:27:34,356 --> 00:27:34,756 Speaker 2: I don't know. 416 00:27:34,796 --> 00:27:38,316 Speaker 3: Maybe that selfishness, right, but also maybe that's for protection. 417 00:27:39,716 --> 00:27:43,916 Speaker 1: Sarah told us she always felt different, but when she 418 00:27:44,116 --> 00:27:47,356 Speaker 1: was posing as a veteran, she felt like she belonged. 419 00:27:47,956 --> 00:27:49,356 Speaker 3: I didn't always think like I'm going to go out 420 00:27:49,356 --> 00:27:50,876 Speaker 3: and lives. I'm just going to go out and drink 421 00:27:50,916 --> 00:27:53,076 Speaker 3: with my friends and try to feel better and like 422 00:27:53,116 --> 00:27:54,156 Speaker 3: be around people I care. 423 00:27:54,076 --> 00:27:58,396 Speaker 1: About, around the people that she cared about. And that, 424 00:27:59,076 --> 00:28:03,356 Speaker 1: right there was the problem because these people, the people 425 00:28:03,476 --> 00:28:06,396 Speaker 1: she cared about, were the same people that she was 426 00:28:06,476 --> 00:28:12,876 Speaker 1: deceiving and manipulating and taking money from. Sarah says that 427 00:28:12,956 --> 00:28:16,876 Speaker 1: what she did stem from a deep need and some 428 00:28:16,996 --> 00:28:18,396 Speaker 1: seriously flawed thinking. 429 00:28:20,276 --> 00:28:25,756 Speaker 3: I just think, like, when you feel inadequate for so long, 430 00:28:26,596 --> 00:28:35,076 Speaker 3: that it manifests in irrational ways. Right, and lying to 431 00:28:35,116 --> 00:28:36,476 Speaker 3: that extent was irrational. 432 00:28:36,796 --> 00:28:39,836 Speaker 2: Right, it was deliberate. I deliberately lied. 433 00:28:40,756 --> 00:28:40,956 Speaker 5: Right. 434 00:28:41,156 --> 00:28:43,556 Speaker 3: No one can say that someone forced me to tell 435 00:28:43,596 --> 00:28:47,996 Speaker 3: those lies. No one did, but they were absolutely irrational. 436 00:28:49,916 --> 00:28:53,796 Speaker 5: Sarah says she used the lies that she'd constructed about herself, 437 00:28:54,396 --> 00:28:59,356 Speaker 5: the whole tragic war hero story, to distract herself from 438 00:28:59,396 --> 00:29:03,676 Speaker 5: her real problems. But of course, what she was doing 439 00:29:04,356 --> 00:29:08,756 Speaker 5: by lying and taking money that wasn't going to fix anything. 440 00:29:09,676 --> 00:29:10,556 Speaker 2: It was only going to. 441 00:29:10,636 --> 00:29:16,676 Speaker 5: Cause more problems, more damage, not just for her, but 442 00:29:16,756 --> 00:29:21,316 Speaker 5: also for those close to her, like Nicole. 443 00:29:33,116 --> 00:29:35,916 Speaker 1: The odd part about all of this is that Sarah 444 00:29:36,236 --> 00:29:39,196 Speaker 1: did have his other life, with a pretty home and 445 00:29:39,236 --> 00:29:45,116 Speaker 1: a caring spouse, a life that seemed pretty good. Even now, 446 00:29:45,156 --> 00:29:48,876 Speaker 1: when Sarah talks about Nicole, you can hear a tenderness 447 00:29:48,916 --> 00:29:52,916 Speaker 1: in her voice. She calls her Nicky, and as far 448 00:29:52,956 --> 00:29:56,556 Speaker 1: as we can tell, Nicky was a lifeline for Sarah. 449 00:29:57,076 --> 00:30:00,476 Speaker 1: It was Nicky who took Sarah and walks and Lincoln Woods. 450 00:30:01,076 --> 00:30:03,916 Speaker 1: It was Nicky who lay rose petals through their house 451 00:30:04,236 --> 00:30:07,276 Speaker 1: to show Sarah just how much she cared. It was 452 00:30:07,476 --> 00:30:10,836 Speaker 1: Nicky who wouldn't let Sarah spend one single night at 453 00:30:10,876 --> 00:30:15,436 Speaker 1: their new house without the promise of a wedding. Even now, 454 00:30:15,676 --> 00:30:18,836 Speaker 1: Sarah gets really emotional when she talks about what it 455 00:30:18,916 --> 00:30:21,036 Speaker 1: meant when Nicole came into her life. 456 00:30:22,516 --> 00:30:29,876 Speaker 3: She really stabilized me. She brought so much to my life, 457 00:30:31,796 --> 00:30:37,956 Speaker 3: and she really saw me for who I was, and 458 00:30:37,996 --> 00:30:41,836 Speaker 3: I didn't have to like be ashamed of where I 459 00:30:41,876 --> 00:30:45,076 Speaker 3: came from, or who my parents were or anything that 460 00:30:45,116 --> 00:30:45,756 Speaker 3: had happened. 461 00:30:47,156 --> 00:30:47,876 Speaker 6: And I was okay. 462 00:30:47,916 --> 00:30:48,596 Speaker 2: I was stable. 463 00:30:50,196 --> 00:30:54,156 Speaker 5: But that stability was short lived. As Sarah went deeper 464 00:30:54,196 --> 00:30:56,876 Speaker 5: and deeper down the rabbit hole posing as a veteran, 465 00:30:57,436 --> 00:31:01,476 Speaker 5: she pulled further and further away from Nicole. Sarah says 466 00:31:01,476 --> 00:31:04,596 Speaker 5: that after work, she'd walk the dogs and then race 467 00:31:04,676 --> 00:31:09,036 Speaker 5: off to various meetings or events with veteran groups. Sometimes 468 00:31:09,276 --> 00:31:12,556 Speaker 5: she'd tell Nicole she was seeing Dave or the VFW guys, 469 00:31:13,156 --> 00:31:17,596 Speaker 5: and other times she just invents something else entirely. As 470 00:31:17,596 --> 00:31:20,796 Speaker 5: she went through the motions, she was constantly preparing for 471 00:31:20,836 --> 00:31:24,836 Speaker 5: the next round of deception, trying to keep her story straight, 472 00:31:25,916 --> 00:31:29,756 Speaker 5: and when she was at home, she was often emotionally unavailable. 473 00:31:30,436 --> 00:31:35,556 Speaker 3: My relationship with Nicole had disintegrated so much because of 474 00:31:35,596 --> 00:31:38,636 Speaker 3: my lies as a veteran and because I was involved 475 00:31:38,636 --> 00:31:41,276 Speaker 3: in all of these events and things like that. 476 00:31:42,396 --> 00:31:46,036 Speaker 2: Even so, Nicole was not ready to give up on her. 477 00:31:46,876 --> 00:31:49,836 Speaker 3: She really wanted to reconnect and wanted us to get 478 00:31:49,876 --> 00:31:53,356 Speaker 3: through this moment and was really trying to kind of 479 00:31:53,356 --> 00:31:59,836 Speaker 3: pull me back, and I did not respond. I put 480 00:31:59,876 --> 00:32:04,516 Speaker 3: no effort. I did not return those emotions. I was 481 00:32:04,556 --> 00:32:07,996 Speaker 3: consumed with what I was doing right with my lie 482 00:32:08,036 --> 00:32:10,916 Speaker 3: and how I was feeling, and she was so unhappy, 483 00:32:10,916 --> 00:32:14,196 Speaker 3: and I was so unhappy because we were just like 484 00:32:15,636 --> 00:32:22,716 Speaker 3: strangers in the night for so long in our house. Right. 485 00:32:30,756 --> 00:32:33,756 Speaker 5: I always thought there must be a true version of Sarah, 486 00:32:34,476 --> 00:32:39,636 Speaker 5: Sarah without masks, living out there somewhere, showing her true 487 00:32:39,676 --> 00:32:43,916 Speaker 5: face to someone. And for a while I thought that 488 00:32:43,996 --> 00:32:47,356 Speaker 5: person was Nicole, that we would find a true version 489 00:32:47,396 --> 00:32:51,956 Speaker 5: of Sarah in their house, like an artifact we could excavate. 490 00:32:53,236 --> 00:32:56,996 Speaker 2: But that just wasn't the case, maybe. 491 00:32:56,716 --> 00:33:01,196 Speaker 5: Because there's an unknowability about Sarah, an invisible wall she 492 00:33:01,276 --> 00:33:03,636 Speaker 5: puts between herself and the world. 493 00:33:11,476 --> 00:33:14,956 Speaker 1: For Sarah and Nicole, the weight of their marriage and 494 00:33:15,036 --> 00:33:18,316 Speaker 1: the years of secrets and lies came to a head 495 00:33:18,436 --> 00:33:22,476 Speaker 1: in February of twenty twenty two. After they returned from 496 00:33:22,516 --> 00:33:25,316 Speaker 1: the hospital and cleaned up the mess from the search, 497 00:33:26,036 --> 00:33:29,036 Speaker 1: they went to their bedroom and with the lights out, 498 00:33:29,316 --> 00:33:33,556 Speaker 1: they lay silently side by side. The room itself had 499 00:33:33,556 --> 00:33:37,116 Speaker 1: once been their inner sanctum the cocoon of their intimacy. 500 00:33:37,916 --> 00:33:41,516 Speaker 1: Nichole had always seen this home as the start of something. 501 00:33:42,436 --> 00:33:46,556 Speaker 1: Years before, she had carefully scattered rose petals and glowing candles, 502 00:33:46,796 --> 00:33:50,156 Speaker 1: creating a trail that led Sarah towards the future that 503 00:33:50,196 --> 00:33:55,036 Speaker 1: they had imagined. But now there was no light, just 504 00:33:55,236 --> 00:33:59,396 Speaker 1: darkness and quiet. Until Nichole finally spoke. 505 00:34:00,716 --> 00:34:03,956 Speaker 6: I asked her one more time, do you have cancer? 506 00:34:04,836 --> 00:34:09,036 Speaker 6: And then she said no, I don't. I think she 507 00:34:09,356 --> 00:34:15,636 Speaker 6: needed the darkness, like the anonymity of that space. I 508 00:34:15,636 --> 00:34:17,916 Speaker 6: don't think she could. Honestly, I don't think she could 509 00:34:17,916 --> 00:34:19,716 Speaker 6: have looked me in the eye and say it. I 510 00:34:19,756 --> 00:34:23,116 Speaker 6: think she needed to be in the dark kind of 511 00:34:23,996 --> 00:34:25,996 Speaker 6: I guess hidden, I would say. 512 00:34:26,836 --> 00:34:30,836 Speaker 1: For Nicole, this moment sliced through everything. 513 00:34:31,996 --> 00:34:34,556 Speaker 6: She can lie to me about that straight to my 514 00:34:34,636 --> 00:34:37,436 Speaker 6: face for how long we've been doing this. I mean 515 00:34:37,436 --> 00:34:40,116 Speaker 6: that lie was over and over and over as we 516 00:34:40,156 --> 00:34:42,836 Speaker 6: worked through and built upon. You know, there's layers to 517 00:34:42,916 --> 00:34:47,316 Speaker 6: that lie, and it if she could build that lie 518 00:34:47,556 --> 00:34:50,556 Speaker 6: to me directly, I didn't feel like I could be, 519 00:34:51,036 --> 00:34:54,436 Speaker 6: you know, connected with this person ever again. I left 520 00:34:54,516 --> 00:34:59,076 Speaker 6: the next day and I never lived in that house again. 521 00:35:06,996 --> 00:35:10,316 Speaker 1: Our interview with Nicole happened in the new place where 522 00:35:10,356 --> 00:35:13,716 Speaker 1: she lives, a tidy townhouse at the edge of a 523 00:35:13,756 --> 00:35:16,996 Speaker 1: busy commercial strip. We had to turn off the heat 524 00:35:17,076 --> 00:35:19,436 Speaker 1: for the interview so our mike wouldn't pick up any 525 00:35:19,436 --> 00:35:22,636 Speaker 1: extra noise. The point is it had gotten kind of 526 00:35:22,716 --> 00:35:26,316 Speaker 1: cold in the room and dark too. The sun had 527 00:35:26,356 --> 00:35:30,396 Speaker 1: gone down, and for a moment we just kind of 528 00:35:30,436 --> 00:35:34,116 Speaker 1: sat there, and then Nicole said this. 529 00:35:35,916 --> 00:35:43,436 Speaker 6: The hardest thing to reconcile for me personally was finding 530 00:35:43,516 --> 00:35:48,876 Speaker 6: out your perception of reality isn't true and accepting that 531 00:35:48,996 --> 00:35:52,236 Speaker 6: I won't know. I won't know from this point on 532 00:35:52,436 --> 00:35:55,716 Speaker 6: forever what was real and what wasn't real as it 533 00:35:55,756 --> 00:35:58,036 Speaker 6: relates to your spouse, right and kind of making peace 534 00:35:58,076 --> 00:36:01,236 Speaker 6: with that was the journey for me following all of 535 00:36:01,316 --> 00:36:03,076 Speaker 6: the aftermath. 536 00:36:04,356 --> 00:36:07,596 Speaker 5: And there are things that Nicole is still figuring out 537 00:36:07,916 --> 00:36:11,236 Speaker 5: without realizing it. We were the ones who broke the 538 00:36:11,276 --> 00:36:14,836 Speaker 5: news to her about Sarah having an affair with Sam. 539 00:36:15,836 --> 00:36:19,036 Speaker 5: We didn't even mean to do this. We just mentioned 540 00:36:19,076 --> 00:36:23,756 Speaker 5: Sam and then realized that Nicole still didn't know, so 541 00:36:23,796 --> 00:36:27,436 Speaker 5: we turned off the tape recorder and explained seemed like 542 00:36:27,476 --> 00:36:31,876 Speaker 5: the right thing to do. Things like this kept happening. 543 00:36:31,996 --> 00:36:34,916 Speaker 5: As we reported this story, there were a bunch of 544 00:36:34,956 --> 00:36:38,436 Speaker 5: times when the people we were interviewing kind of turned 545 00:36:38,436 --> 00:36:42,716 Speaker 5: the tables and started asking us questions like what did 546 00:36:42,756 --> 00:36:44,236 Speaker 5: we know about Sarah? 547 00:36:44,516 --> 00:36:45,196 Speaker 2: Was this true? 548 00:36:45,676 --> 00:36:49,356 Speaker 5: Or was that true? And in a way, the whole 549 00:36:49,356 --> 00:36:52,396 Speaker 5: thing that Nicole said to us about not trusting her 550 00:36:52,436 --> 00:36:56,836 Speaker 5: perception of reality, it kind of pertained to almost everyone 551 00:36:56,916 --> 00:37:03,236 Speaker 5: in this story. Everyone was and is grasping for answers. 552 00:37:06,916 --> 00:37:11,516 Speaker 1: For Sarah, the aftermath was something else entirely. She was 553 00:37:11,596 --> 00:37:15,476 Speaker 1: now in the house alone with hardly anyone to rely on. 554 00:37:16,236 --> 00:37:19,276 Speaker 1: She'd been outed, The media was buzzing with stories of 555 00:37:19,316 --> 00:37:23,516 Speaker 1: her lies. The authorities had seized many of her personal possessions. 556 00:37:23,996 --> 00:37:27,996 Speaker 1: She had no phone, no wife, no heroic backstory to 557 00:37:28,076 --> 00:37:32,196 Speaker 1: fall back upon. Whether she realized it or not, there 558 00:37:32,276 --> 00:37:35,356 Speaker 1: was nothing left to do but wait for the arrest 559 00:37:35,676 --> 00:37:41,596 Speaker 1: and a much more public reckoning next time. On the 560 00:37:41,596 --> 00:37:46,476 Speaker 1: finale of Deep Cover The Truth about Sarah. 561 00:37:45,836 --> 00:37:50,596 Speaker 7: I didn't necessarily have any second thoughts about representing missus 562 00:37:50,796 --> 00:37:56,076 Speaker 7: Galana and anything. It is more of intrigue as to 563 00:37:57,156 --> 00:38:00,756 Speaker 7: how she ended up in the situation that she was in. 564 00:38:01,436 --> 00:38:07,356 Speaker 1: Every defendant comes before court having had some sort of loss. 565 00:38:07,076 --> 00:38:08,436 Speaker 2: Or trauma in their life. 566 00:38:09,316 --> 00:38:12,556 Speaker 1: Human has such things, but not every human goes out. 567 00:38:12,436 --> 00:38:13,276 Speaker 2: And he mixed crime. 568 00:38:14,076 --> 00:38:17,316 Speaker 4: She came in like behind me. I turned around and 569 00:38:17,356 --> 00:38:23,276 Speaker 4: she was there, and that was kind of it was 570 00:38:23,316 --> 00:38:25,596 Speaker 4: almost like getting hit by lightning, kind of like just 571 00:38:25,676 --> 00:38:27,796 Speaker 4: kind of like this fight or flight response. 572 00:38:28,396 --> 00:38:30,756 Speaker 3: I knew his last name. I knew he was enrolled 573 00:38:30,796 --> 00:38:34,996 Speaker 3: in care. There those aren't excuses, that's not right, but 574 00:38:35,036 --> 00:38:37,716 Speaker 3: those are facts that I knew, which made it reliable 575 00:38:37,756 --> 00:38:38,956 Speaker 3: to go to that document. 576 00:38:56,756 --> 00:39:00,196 Speaker 1: Deep Cover The Truth About Sarah was produced by Amy 577 00:39:00,236 --> 00:39:05,796 Speaker 1: Gaines McQuaid and Tally Emlin. Additional production support by Sonya Gurwood. 578 00:39:06,276 --> 00:39:10,196 Speaker 5: Our show was edited by Karen Shakurji. Our executive producer 579 00:39:10,276 --> 00:39:13,476 Speaker 5: is Jacob Smith. Mastering by Jake Gorsky. 580 00:39:14,276 --> 00:39:17,756 Speaker 1: Original scoring in our theme We're composed by Luis Gara. 581 00:39:18,396 --> 00:39:22,196 Speaker 1: Our show art was designed by Sean Carney. Fact checking 582 00:39:22,316 --> 00:39:23,556 Speaker 1: by Anika Robbins. 583 00:39:24,356 --> 00:39:28,756 Speaker 5: Special thanks to Sarah Nis, Izzy Carter, Daphne Chen, Jake 584 00:39:28,796 --> 00:39:30,596 Speaker 5: Flanagan and Greta Cohne. 585 00:39:31,396 --> 00:39:32,996 Speaker 2: Additional thanks to Vicky Merrick. 586 00:39:33,916 --> 00:39:53,636 Speaker 1: I'm Jess mceugh and I'm Jake Halpern. Hey it's Jake, 587 00:39:54,076 --> 00:39:57,196 Speaker 1: and look I got a little favor to ask. If 588 00:39:57,236 --> 00:40:00,716 Speaker 1: you like the show, please just take one minute and 589 00:40:00,756 --> 00:40:05,276 Speaker 1: review us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Honestly, it really 590 00:40:05,316 --> 00:40:08,676 Speaker 1: helps new listeners find the show, which in turn helps 591 00:40:08,716 --> 00:40:12,556 Speaker 1: us conte you making these stories for you. Thanks a lot.