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Speaker 1: Damn, but he hogged.

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Speaker 2: It's time for donkey.

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Speaker 1: I me ain't trying to be donkey today no more.

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Speaker 2: They should be embarrassed by what they already did. I'm

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Speaker 2: not making these people do these things.

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Speaker 3: Called Donkey of the day, and it really caught me

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Speaker 3: off guard.

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Speaker 4: Damn Charlamagne, who got the donkey out of the day

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Speaker 4: to day?

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Speaker 1: Well, Jess hilarious.

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Speaker 2: So Donkey of Today for Friday September first goes to

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Speaker 2: a human who is responsible for two women being struck

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Speaker 2: by gunfire during a Chicago White Sox game in Chicago.

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Speaker 5: Okay, salute to Chicago, dropping the clues boud for Chicago.

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Speaker 2: But Chicago already got such a bad reputation for gun violence,

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Speaker 2: and when things like this happen, you have to ask yourself,

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Speaker 2: is there anywhere safe to go in Chicago?

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Speaker 5: See?

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Speaker 2: Two women were struck by gunfire. One was forty two,

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Speaker 2: the other was twenty six. They both are expected to

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Speaker 2: recover from the shooting. The forty two year old sustained

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Speaker 2: the gunshot wound to the leg and the twenty six

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Speaker 2: year old had a graze wounded her abdomen. Now I

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Speaker 2: know you're sitting here wondering how did someone get a

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Speaker 2: gun into a stadium?

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Speaker 5: We've all been to major league sporting events.

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Speaker 2: Getting a weapon in there is like trying to sneak

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Speaker 2: a weapon through airport security.

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Speaker 1: It ain't happening. Okay.

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Speaker 2: I know my father got a kaser in the met

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Speaker 2: life back in the day. But times were different then. Okay,

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Speaker 2: not to mention, were talking about a pistol in Chicago. Okay,

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Speaker 2: a metal detective go off in Chicago, then everybody got

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Speaker 2: to be alert because it's probably a weapon in the building. Well,

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Speaker 2: this weapon got snuck in, allegedly by someone who didn't

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Speaker 2: give a damn about First Lady Michelle Obama's initiative to

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Speaker 2: bring back physical activity in schools.

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Speaker 5: Because The New York.

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Speaker 2: Post said a gun fired at a White Sox game

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Speaker 2: was snuck in via this woman's belly fat.

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Speaker 1: Wow what. I don't know if.

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Speaker 5: It's true, but damn it's funny, Okay.

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Speaker 1: According to a report bout.

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Speaker 2: Chicago based ESPN, two sources close to the investigation said

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Speaker 2: the gun was brought into the stadium hidden in the

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Speaker 2: roles of a woman's belly fat. Yes, they said this

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Speaker 2: woman was the size of former Governor of New Jersey

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Speaker 2: Chris Christie. And you know, I don't want to call

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Speaker 2: this person fat because somebody told me fat isn't politically correct.

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Speaker 2: You should say something fun, like blubber. Where did Judy bloom?

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Speaker 1: That is great? It's horrible, It's not good.

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Speaker 5: Blubber is horrible.

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Speaker 1: They say whinny like we need the poop, We need

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Speaker 1: to poop.

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Speaker 2: Okay, they say jelly bean is also a great alternative

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Speaker 2: to the word fat. I don't know, na man, just

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Speaker 2: say big. You think big, but big don't necessarily mean

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Speaker 2: fatty fat.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I think fat is the coolest.

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Speaker 3: That is the only way.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Fat is just the only way.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Because when I turned to the Book of Wokeness,

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Speaker 2: chapter thirty two, verse seven and look for fun names

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Speaker 2: for fat, I don't like any of them. I don't

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Speaker 2: like double wide. I don't like cruise control. That's for

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Speaker 2: a fat person who doesn't move fast. I don't like

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Speaker 2: big Chief Almighty.

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Speaker 1: I don't.

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Speaker 2: I definitely don't like Lizzo's from a backup dances. That's just,

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Speaker 2: oh my god, I don't like.

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Speaker 1: I don't. Oh this is this fatty Patty might be

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Speaker 1: good fatty.

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Speaker 3: No, that's the fat that's still use north fast.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, faty is crazy, right, come on, once you put the

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Speaker 4: t on.

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Speaker 1: It, fatty fatty is cute, like you know, fat.

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Speaker 5: Maybe is cute.

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Speaker 3: Before a grown woman. I don't know. No, I like,

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Speaker 3: this's just fat.

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Speaker 1: Just fat.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, well that's what we're gonna say. This person

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Speaker 2: snuck a gun. I can say this person snuck a

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Speaker 2: gun in between our fatty patties. This person snuck a

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Speaker 2: gun in between our fatty patties. Okay, let me tell

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Speaker 2: you something. This is when wokeness goes wrong. Because when

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Speaker 2: this scale tipple went through the metal detective all right,

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Speaker 2: it went off like three separate times. Security even did

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Speaker 2: extra checking but didn't find a gun. I can't prove this,

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Speaker 2: but I have a sneaky suspicion that one of these

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Speaker 2: security guards was looking at those roles and they said

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Speaker 2: to themselves, I need to be a muffin top mover

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Speaker 2: right now, I need to be a chubby checker and

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Speaker 2: lift up that piece of flab right there. But they

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Speaker 2: chose not to because they didn't want to offend said

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Speaker 2: scale tipple.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I guarantee.

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Speaker 2: And because that person didn't want to offend, two people

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Speaker 2: got shot. And now that stadium guaranteed rad Field in Chicago,

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Speaker 2: I guarantee is about to be sued and they gonna

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Speaker 2: have to write a check that's as big as Jonah

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Speaker 2: Hill used to be.

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Speaker 3: Oh wow, So.

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Speaker 2: Please give this wabble warrior who caused two people to

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Speaker 2: get shot the biggest he h wow.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 3: But that's the advantage of being fat though, you know,

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Speaker 3: in that.

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Speaker 1: Moment high guns, that's the advantage.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Well, it's definitely a disadvantage for the people who get shot, yes,

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Speaker 4: but it's the advantage.

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Speaker 1: In that moment.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, in that moment.

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Speaker 2: Speaking of fat, you don't want to bring in something

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Speaker 2: that's fattening, fattening, fattening.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, some calories this morning, going.

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Speaker 1: Days, the day, Sunday, it's just going day. But we're

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Speaker 1: celebrating the day. That ain't me.

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Speaker 4: He's over there now.

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Speaker 1: Definitely not cake.

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Speaker 2: Look at this amazing cake that we designed. Oh my,

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Speaker 2: going to the camera, to the camera. That's not an ass. Now,

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Speaker 2: let me describe this.

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Speaker 1: That is a waffle colored negro cake. Just look at it.

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Speaker 3: I see Dominican Republican flag.

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Speaker 4: I'm not Dominican and some all with some black Beijing.

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Speaker 2: That's a waffle that has Envy's face on it. I

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Speaker 2: got the black Beijing, I got the black hair. That's

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Speaker 2: my bit, that's your bit. Man, my god, why the

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Speaker 2: colored negro cake?

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Speaker 3: Come on, now, what's going on with the significance and

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Speaker 3: a whiffle.

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Speaker 1: He calls me a wiffle color against complexion.

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Speaker 6: I'm not waffle color and I'm not Dominican, and I

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Speaker 6: don't use basing.

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Speaker 1: You're actually not waffle color no more. You got light.

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Speaker 1: It's weird. Oh my god, look at that. Don't take this.

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Speaker 1: Take the Dominican music off. And the only thing they

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Speaker 1: got right at the yag. Yeah, oh that's a hat.

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Speaker 1: That's that's a hat.

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Speaker 2: Oh.

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Speaker 1: I told him to make your hair. I told him

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Speaker 1: to put the Beijing on your hair too.

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Speaker 2: They did well, the kind of did. Oh yeah, they

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Speaker 2: got it dripping out the hat. They got there, you go,

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Speaker 2: good job. They gotta dripping out the side of the hat.

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Speaker 2: You know it's yellow. You know it's yellow. Cakes, I'm

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Speaker 2: playing attention to detail.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you know what it's yellow? Hand go come.

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Speaker 4: On, hey, I appreciate it.

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Speaker 1: I don't use basing though, just man, that's right, just

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Speaker 1: like that. And I'm not Dominican. I'm not Dominican slights.

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Speaker 1: Bring out the nine, bring the paper places. I appreciate you.

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Speaker 1: Got get a slice.

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Speaker 3: I love you.

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Speaker 2: Indeed, let's get a slice.

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Speaker 1: I look all right, I appreciate you guys. Now, I

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Speaker 1: know it's the weekend. Birthday is Sunday, and that's right,

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Speaker 1: so I know you got plans.

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Speaker 3: It's Friday, Friday, Lord Jesus, what is the plan?

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Speaker 1: All right?

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Speaker 2: Now?

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Speaker 6: The freaking, freaky, freaky Friday question is just watch Friday

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Speaker 6: five one oh five one project.

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Speaker 1: No, I'm not. He's very excited. No I'm not.

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Speaker 6: So I got I gotta get to the story because

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Speaker 6: I gotta. I gotta post it the right way. Hold on, now,

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Speaker 6: recently there's been a lot of hold on, where's that?

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Speaker 1: Where's that?

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Speaker 2: Man?

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Speaker 1: They've been finding a lot of things his story off

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Speaker 1: the top.

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Speaker 6: They've been finding a lot of things in people's butts,

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Speaker 6: and I gotta.

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Speaker 1: Pull up the story. Hold on, I gotta.

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Speaker 3: This is Charlamaine having in this fate? You send it

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Speaker 3: over real quick?

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Speaker 1: Whatever? Yeah, right, I gotta find the damn. I did

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Speaker 1: the study. Yes, he did the study. Man, Why are

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Speaker 1: you looking like you don't know this story? Man? No,

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Speaker 1: because I got I gotta get the right.

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Speaker 4: Not right, say this is a mess, like tell me

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Speaker 4: about act held on the story. Chaine already know what

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Speaker 4: it is.

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Speaker 2: He had me.

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Speaker 1: I want to say something.

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Speaker 6: Hey, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead, go

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Speaker 6: Steady claims more Americans are being hospitalized after finding foreign

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Speaker 6: objects stuck in their rectum. All right now, the five

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Speaker 6: objects that people are finding are cans, marbles, balls, drugs,

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Speaker 6: bottle jars and bottle caps, and pens in their butts. Now,

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Speaker 6: the highest age group to finding the most things in

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Speaker 6: their butts are rectums, as they call it. Foreign objects

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Speaker 6: are twenty to twenty four. It is number one, believable.

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Speaker 6: Twenty five to twenty nine is number two. Fifty five

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Speaker 6: to fifty nine is right behind it.

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Speaker 4: Nobody doing that, Nobody that you know how you skipped

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Speaker 4: the thirties and the forties and the fifties.

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Speaker 1: One b so eight hundred five eight five one o

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Speaker 1: five one.

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Speaker 6: Let's ask have you ever had anything stuck in your wreck?

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Speaker 5: By the way, this is dj MV today's birthday.

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Speaker 1: We celebrating him. This is his topic.

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Speaker 2: This is what he chose to talk about on a Friday,

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Speaker 2: what him and Yeah, I got playing this weekend.

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Speaker 6: But hey man eight one five, we're asking this is

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Speaker 6: a no judgment zone. What have you had stuck in

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Speaker 6: your butt? Don't say this ain't no joke judgments. I'm judging.

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Speaker 4: Anybody call I'm stuck in but to say, yeah, I

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Speaker 4: ain't never getting nothing stuck in. But but believe anything

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Speaker 4: went in there, it was able to come out. I

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Speaker 4: didn't have to go to the emergency room. Yes, yes,

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Speaker 4: I had some things, yeah, but no, not nothing stuck

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Speaker 4: up in there.

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Speaker 3: All right, Well, they don't never go that fall. We're

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Speaker 3: trying to do.

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Speaker 1: Just yeah, like, how what's going on?

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Speaker 6: Charlamagne. We'll talk to abou Charlamne when we come back.

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Speaker 6: Five one, five to one.

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Speaker 1: Have you ever had anything your kids? What I mean, yeah,

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Speaker 1: toy stuck in that money might be listening to Love

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Speaker 1: Love embarrassing five eighty five. That is daddy embarrassing you again.

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Speaker 1: It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning, The Breakfast Club.

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Speaker 2: Donkey Today is brought to you by the law office

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Speaker 2: of Michael s Laminsoft. Don't be a donkey. Do pound

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Speaker 2: two fifty on your cell and say the bull. If

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Speaker 2: you've been hurting a construction accident, that's pound two five

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Speaker 2: oz from your cell and say the bull