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Speaker 1: What's up y'all? This big loan from It's Up that podcast.

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Speaker 1: In this powerful episode, we're breaking down the danger of

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Speaker 1: silence and how way too many of us are talked

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Speaker 1: to protect the vibe instead of protecting ourselves. You ever

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Speaker 1: notice how quiet men get when the conversation turns real.

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Speaker 1: I mean, we can argue money, music, legacy, but the

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Speaker 1: second it requires accountability, our vocabulary disappears. We've been trained

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Speaker 1: to look strong in silence and our safe in honesty.

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Speaker 1: See comfort tricks you. It tells you it feels right.

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Speaker 1: But feelings don't always mean safety, and sometimes they mean familiarity.

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Speaker 1: A lot of men are addicted to familiar danger because

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Speaker 1: silence got celebrated. He don't talk too much, He's solid.

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Speaker 1: But silence ain't always strength. Sometimes it's avoidance dressed up

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Speaker 1: like maturity. We tend to call feel control. See I've

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Speaker 1: set across from some brothers who would rather risk their

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Speaker 1: life rather than ask an awkward question something like hey, yo,

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Speaker 1: when you test it, that question don't cost a thing,

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Speaker 1: but pride makes it feel like a threat. We spend

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Speaker 1: more time researching calls, microphones sneakers, then we will researching

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Speaker 1: on how to protect our bodies and our partners. Protection

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Speaker 1: isn't a vibe. It's a decision. It's not chemistry, it's clarity.

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Speaker 1: It's shocking to know what people are risk for pleasure.

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Speaker 1: We'll know your playlist, not whether or not you have

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Speaker 1: a health plan. And it's a gamble. We lay down

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Speaker 1: before we speak up. We call it trust, but it's

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Speaker 1: really assumption. See silence costs you more than the conversation

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Speaker 1: ever could that vibe you're trying to protect. It's not

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Speaker 1: safe from the circumstances if you have an honest conversation,

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Speaker 1: One uncomfortable minute can save you a lifetime of regret.

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Speaker 1: The CDC says nearly one in five people carrying STI

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Speaker 1: and most don't even know it. You can't see safety.

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Speaker 1: You literally have to ask for it. And it's not paranoia,

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Speaker 1: it's leadership because leadership isn't about domination, it's about direction,

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Speaker 1: and direction starts with a dialogue. You cannot protect what

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Speaker 1: you refuse to discuss. You can't claim maturity if you

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Speaker 1: treat prevention like an insult. And the next generation is

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Speaker 1: watching us. They're learning how to communicate and what to

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Speaker 1: communicate about. And also they're paying attention to what we avoid.

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Speaker 1: If you want to raise sons who lead with intelligence

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Speaker 1: instead of in posts, we gotta model that. Read the

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Speaker 1: room they told us no speak up in it. Real

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Speaker 1: intiman isn't built in the dark. It's built in the

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Speaker 1: disclosure condoms, testing transparency. Those aren't passion killers, they're peace builders.

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Speaker 1: It's safe. You can't have freedom in your body if

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Speaker 1: you're living in fear of your truth. Safety doesn't start

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Speaker 1: with take your clothes off. It starts with op in

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Speaker 1: your mouth. Talk to me. So before you lay down,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna ask that you speak up, because if you

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Speaker 1: don't talk about it, you don't know. And if you

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Speaker 1: don't know, you're not protected. You may be comfortable, but

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Speaker 1: you're not protected. And what really is comfort without clarity,

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Speaker 1: That's how people lose everything. You can make a decision

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Speaker 1: that you cannot come back from. We've been raised to

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Speaker 1: chase the feeling. We've been raised and been taught to

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Speaker 1: be lawyer to our emotions. Oftentimes, as men will figure

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Speaker 1: out how she moaned before how she moved. You might

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Speaker 1: have knew the rhythm, but you did not know the record.

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Speaker 1: You laid down before you even spoke up, and when

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Speaker 1: the lights cut on. You call that maturity, But comfort

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Speaker 1: without a conversation is a gambo. You betting your peace

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Speaker 1: on the hope that somebody else did the work you

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Speaker 1: refuse to ask about. I've seen men lose everything, not

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Speaker 1: because they didn't care, but because they didn't ask. It's

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Speaker 1: too much risk in our silence. See, nobody showed us

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Speaker 1: how to have a conversation that can change how we feel. See.

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Speaker 1: Half of the game that they give us is just

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Speaker 1: read the room. Read the room, feel the energy. You

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Speaker 1: hear a lot of people talk about energy. Some things

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Speaker 1: you have to clarify some things that energy can lie about.

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Speaker 1: So I said it again. We've been taught to read

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Speaker 1: the room, not speak in it. We can read the energy,

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Speaker 1: but nobody taught us how to address it. Silence feels

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Speaker 1: like safety, but it's really avoidance and the wild part

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Speaker 1: we call it strength. Protection ain't a feeling this information.

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Speaker 1: You can't protect what you refuse to talk about. It's

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Speaker 1: not enough to wear a condom if if you can't

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Speaker 1: even ask that somebody when they was last tested, it's

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Speaker 1: not enough to pull out if you never pulled up

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Speaker 1: a conversation about health. My name is Lonin. I want

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Speaker 1: to let you know that silence is expensive, you more

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Speaker 1: than comfort ever could have gave you. And the truth

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Speaker 1: is you're not just protecting yourself, you're protecting a version

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Speaker 1: of you that's supposed to lead. Love it last. Leadership

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Speaker 1: starts in the conversation before you lay down. Speak up,

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Speaker 1: because if you didn't talk about it, you don't know.

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Speaker 1: And if you don't know, you're not safe. You're just comfortable.

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Speaker 1: If we protect your name, protect your peace, protect your partner,

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Speaker 1: that's not fear talking, it's discipline. Real men don't gamble

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Speaker 1: with that legacy. They guard it. It's too much risk

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Speaker 1: in our silence. Speak up. This special episode of It's

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Speaker 1: Up That Podcast with Long brought to you by Healthy

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Speaker 1: Sexual from Gilead Sciencist