1 00:00:00,840 --> 00:00:04,160 Speaker 1: All right, guys, time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen. 2 00:00:04,160 --> 00:00:07,640 Speaker 1: If you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, 3 00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:11,240 Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM 4 00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:14,600 Speaker 1: dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be 5 00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,680 Speaker 1: reading your letter live on the air, just like we're 6 00:00:17,680 --> 00:00:21,360 Speaker 1: gonna read this one right here, right now. Buckle up, 7 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:23,400 Speaker 1: hold on tight. We got it for you. Here. It 8 00:00:23,640 --> 00:00:29,240 Speaker 1: is the Strawberry Letta. Thank you enough you subject Aletta 9 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:37,279 Speaker 1: back from versus Aletta Letta. All right, subject. I don't 10 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:40,240 Speaker 1: want to be in this wedding, Okay, Dear Stephen Shirley. 11 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:43,040 Speaker 1: I've been asked to stand with my friend in his wedding. 12 00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:46,199 Speaker 1: I'm a female, so I can't be a groomsman, but 13 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:49,239 Speaker 1: I'll be at his side at the wedding. Why am 14 00:00:49,240 --> 00:00:52,199 Speaker 1: I not a bridesmaid? You ask? The future wife is 15 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:54,560 Speaker 1: controlling and she doesn't want him to keep any of 16 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:57,560 Speaker 1: his female friend. My friend and I are so close 17 00:00:57,600 --> 00:01:00,279 Speaker 1: that he officiated my wedding, and now he and my 18 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: husband are the best of friends. I've had mixed feelings 19 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:06,720 Speaker 1: from the beginning about this wedding, so it's no secrets 20 00:01:06,760 --> 00:01:09,840 Speaker 1: that I don't think it will last. Here's why. My 21 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:12,200 Speaker 1: friend has a habit of putting up with selfish and 22 00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:15,600 Speaker 1: whiny women and then runs to me when they get 23 00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:19,880 Speaker 1: too unbearable. She's the worst one he has been with 24 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:23,920 Speaker 1: so far. She doesn't seem to like any of our friends, 25 00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:26,200 Speaker 1: who are all married and have better things to do 26 00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:30,440 Speaker 1: than coddle her and beg her for her friendship. She's 27 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:32,760 Speaker 1: talked crap about all of us, and my friend will 28 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:35,800 Speaker 1: tell us in an indirect way, so we just avoid 29 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:38,480 Speaker 1: her at all costs. Despite him spending all of this 30 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:41,600 Speaker 1: time with her and her two kids, he can't spend 31 00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:44,680 Speaker 1: time with his niece and nephew without her getting an attitude. 32 00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:47,520 Speaker 1: He also wants at least one child of his own, 33 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:50,840 Speaker 1: and she's told him she doesn't want any more children. 34 00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:54,040 Speaker 1: He said she's jealous because she doesn't have the one 35 00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:57,280 Speaker 1: friend and she's not close with her sister. I told 36 00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:59,800 Speaker 1: him that's a red flag because it means she's hard 37 00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:02,480 Speaker 1: to get along with. Anything I tell him falls on 38 00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:05,280 Speaker 1: deaf ears. I want him to see that he's making 39 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:08,239 Speaker 1: a big mistake before it's too late. Should I skip 40 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:10,440 Speaker 1: the wedding and lose a friend or try to befriend 41 00:02:10,480 --> 00:02:13,520 Speaker 1: his wife once more. I don't want to go anywhere 42 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:18,320 Speaker 1: I'm not welcome. Please help, well, I say no, don't 43 00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:21,960 Speaker 1: skip the wedding. Just don't be in the wedding, all right, 44 00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:26,480 Speaker 1: don't do it, Okay, you will be miserable. And I'm 45 00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:29,000 Speaker 1: going to tell you this. You're not a bridesmaid because 46 00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:32,840 Speaker 1: you're his friend, not hers. So tell your friend you're 47 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:35,600 Speaker 1: going to be there to support him. But you don't 48 00:02:35,639 --> 00:02:39,480 Speaker 1: feel comfortable knowing that his wife doesn't approve of you 49 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:42,000 Speaker 1: as his friend and all of that, and you don't 50 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:44,440 Speaker 1: want to be in that mess. And that's all you 51 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:47,040 Speaker 1: say about his wife, because if she's as bad as 52 00:02:47,040 --> 00:02:51,240 Speaker 1: you say she is, he'll find out sooner or later. Unfortunately, 53 00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:54,480 Speaker 1: it might not be before he marries her, especially the 54 00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:57,480 Speaker 1: part about her not wanting any more children. So you 55 00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:01,680 Speaker 1: want a child but your wife doesn't. And you guys 56 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,120 Speaker 1: have already talked about that, and you know this, but 57 00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:08,240 Speaker 1: you're still gonna go ahead with the wedding. That that's 58 00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:12,119 Speaker 1: a serious red flag and you should not do all right. 59 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:15,040 Speaker 1: I don't know why you're still marrying this woman thinking 60 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:17,920 Speaker 1: I guess perhaps that she might change her mind, that 61 00:03:18,639 --> 00:03:22,560 Speaker 1: probably won't happen. She seems pretty clear of what she 62 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:29,480 Speaker 1: doesn't want anyway. You know, I still say, don't skip 63 00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:31,720 Speaker 1: the wedding. You don't want to lose him as a friend. 64 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:34,560 Speaker 1: And my advice to you to be to stay out 65 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:37,680 Speaker 1: of their business because you know way too much about 66 00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:39,680 Speaker 1: what's going on in their business. But I guess he 67 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 1: does tell you a lot. But just go to the 68 00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:46,840 Speaker 1: wedding and steer clear of all the foolishness. Steve, you 69 00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: know this is not a kind of crazy. Yeah, it is, 70 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:53,040 Speaker 1: because it gets crazy at the beginning. So this woman, 71 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:56,400 Speaker 1: it's really good friends with this man who's man and 72 00:03:56,400 --> 00:04:00,840 Speaker 1: a woman she doesn't approve of, but your friend wants 73 00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:04,480 Speaker 1: her in the wedding. Like Shirley said, now, you can't 74 00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:08,320 Speaker 1: be a groom's a bridesmaid because you're not a friend 75 00:04:08,360 --> 00:04:11,200 Speaker 1: of the bride. So if you're gonna be next to 76 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:16,120 Speaker 1: him at the wedding, what is you gonna be? Man? 77 00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:23,159 Speaker 1: I'm stuck what weddness this? Because I ain't never seen 78 00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:26,839 Speaker 1: this before. Yeah, I ain't never seen a woman be 79 00:04:26,880 --> 00:04:29,960 Speaker 1: a groom froman not saying you can't be, but I 80 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:32,840 Speaker 1: ain't never seen it. So if you're not a bridesmaid, 81 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:34,840 Speaker 1: but you're gonna be next to his side at the 82 00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:39,880 Speaker 1: wedding as of what you're just gonna stand up there, 83 00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:43,080 Speaker 1: what you're gonna have on because you can't wed it tucks, 84 00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:49,080 Speaker 1: you're a lady groom. A lady groom. Yeah, well, I 85 00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:54,040 Speaker 1: don't think your wife going for that. So she says 86 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,320 Speaker 1: that your friend they so close that he officiated her 87 00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:01,040 Speaker 1: wedding and now he and her husband are the best friends. 88 00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:05,919 Speaker 1: Now this lady say she got mixed feelings about his wedding, 89 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:09,719 Speaker 1: so she don't think it's gonna last because your friend 90 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:12,719 Speaker 1: has a habit to dude be putting selfish and wine 91 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:15,200 Speaker 1: and women in his life, and then he runs to 92 00:05:15,279 --> 00:05:18,720 Speaker 1: me when they get too unbearable. But this one is 93 00:05:18,720 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 1: the worst one so far. So the woman don't like 94 00:05:22,520 --> 00:05:26,159 Speaker 1: none of y'all's friends, who are all married and have 95 00:05:26,279 --> 00:05:30,159 Speaker 1: better things to do than coddle her. She talks crap 96 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:33,799 Speaker 1: about all of us, and then your friend, this guy 97 00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:39,440 Speaker 1: tells y'all in indirect ways what she's saying about y'all. Okay, 98 00:05:39,480 --> 00:05:43,159 Speaker 1: pump your pump your brakes party, Why are you doing that? 99 00:05:44,839 --> 00:05:51,480 Speaker 1: So now you telling your friends your girl that's your friend, 100 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:57,000 Speaker 1: what your future wife says about her and everybody else? Bro? 101 00:05:57,120 --> 00:06:01,040 Speaker 1: Who side you him? I mean you already on your 102 00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:04,680 Speaker 1: wife to b side. She ain't on your side. So 103 00:06:04,720 --> 00:06:06,760 Speaker 1: what the hell y'all getting mad? Ain't around on the 104 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:12,000 Speaker 1: same team in this letter? So y'all avoid this lady 105 00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:17,080 Speaker 1: now he got she got two kids. He can't spend 106 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:19,880 Speaker 1: time with his niece and nephew without her getting attitude. 107 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:24,919 Speaker 1: Damn this chick right here? Why is he mad? And 108 00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 1: then he want a child of his own and she 109 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:29,840 Speaker 1: told him she don't want him more kids? What Shelley right? 110 00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:33,960 Speaker 1: What y'all getting mad for? Y'all don't want the same things. 111 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:36,479 Speaker 1: Y'all don't want the same friends. Y'all want the same 112 00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:39,440 Speaker 1: when y'all don't even want the same amount of kids. 113 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:43,320 Speaker 1: Hold on, Steve, hold that thought. We'll have part two 114 00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:46,919 Speaker 1: of your response coming up at twenty three minutes after 115 00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:49,320 Speaker 1: the hours, subject I don't want to be in his wedding. 116 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:51,840 Speaker 1: All right, we'll get back into it right after this. 117 00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:56,520 Speaker 1: You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve, 118 00:06:56,600 --> 00:07:00,240 Speaker 1: let's recap today's Strawberry letters. Subject I don't want to 119 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:04,200 Speaker 1: be in his wedding. Well, I'm gonna tell y'all something 120 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:08,040 Speaker 1: about this letter. This letter is over with, just like 121 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:15,960 Speaker 1: this madges, this short lived mess right here. Man, this 122 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:19,960 Speaker 1: actually has no chance. These two people that are getting 123 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:25,440 Speaker 1: married don't want the same things. This guy has a 124 00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:28,480 Speaker 1: friend who's a girl that's one of his best friends 125 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:31,160 Speaker 1: so much that he wants her in the wedding. The 126 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,240 Speaker 1: girl that wrote this letter don't want to be in 127 00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:36,400 Speaker 1: the wedding because of her relationship with the wife, but 128 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:38,480 Speaker 1: she wants to be. But the dude in that that's 129 00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:40,240 Speaker 1: could come and be in the wedding and be at 130 00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:43,440 Speaker 1: his side. Now they're such good friends that this guy 131 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:48,080 Speaker 1: and officiated this girl's wedding with her husband. And now 132 00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:51,480 Speaker 1: the girl's husband and this guy she's talking about his 133 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:55,480 Speaker 1: best friends. Well, the wife don't want to as a bride. Man, 134 00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:58,360 Speaker 1: I don't know what she's gonna do anywhere because she 135 00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:04,640 Speaker 1: can't be a groomsman. He knows his wife don't like 136 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:07,560 Speaker 1: the girl, none of the friends, and he tells the 137 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:12,480 Speaker 1: friends indirectly what the wife say about them. He also 138 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:16,960 Speaker 1: is always picking controlling and whiney women, and the woman says, 139 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,200 Speaker 1: this is the worst one that a woman he's gonna 140 00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:22,720 Speaker 1: marry has two children. He can't spend no time with 141 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:25,800 Speaker 1: his niece and nephew without hugging the attitude because she 142 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:29,120 Speaker 1: want him all to himself. And then he has expressed 143 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,480 Speaker 1: it he wants a child, and she just says she 144 00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:34,839 Speaker 1: don't want no more kids. All right, let's go over this. 145 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:39,040 Speaker 1: She don't like none of your friends, tho, none of 146 00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:43,560 Speaker 1: your friends like her. You tell your friends what she says, 147 00:08:43,559 --> 00:08:46,360 Speaker 1: so you mow on your friends team than you are 148 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:50,760 Speaker 1: on the wife's team. She don't want the more kids 149 00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:55,280 Speaker 1: you do. We got a lot that ain't matching up right, Hill? Yeah, 150 00:08:55,760 --> 00:09:00,400 Speaker 1: So why y'all getting married? I don't understand. And then 151 00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:03,360 Speaker 1: he said that she's jealous because she doesn't have but 152 00:09:03,520 --> 00:09:07,679 Speaker 1: one friend and she's not close with her sister. Now, 153 00:09:07,679 --> 00:09:10,560 Speaker 1: if you're not close with your sister, can explain why 154 00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:13,520 Speaker 1: he's not close with any Why she's not close with 155 00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:16,520 Speaker 1: none of y'all friends. She ain't even friends with her sister. 156 00:09:17,880 --> 00:09:20,760 Speaker 1: So if you cannot like your sister, now know family difference. 157 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,920 Speaker 1: Sometimes you don't get to pickle like you do friends, 158 00:09:24,320 --> 00:09:26,240 Speaker 1: but you can't even have a relationship with your sister. 159 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,600 Speaker 1: You told him that's a red flag because that means 160 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:33,040 Speaker 1: she hard to get along with. But everything you tell him, 161 00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:36,600 Speaker 1: you say, falls on death fears. You want him to 162 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:39,160 Speaker 1: see that he's making a big mistake before it's too late. 163 00:09:39,760 --> 00:09:42,480 Speaker 1: Should I skip the wedding and lose a friend or 164 00:09:42,559 --> 00:09:46,680 Speaker 1: try to befriend his wife once more? Well you can try, 165 00:09:47,559 --> 00:09:50,520 Speaker 1: But didn't you say in the letter she don't want y'all. 166 00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:52,520 Speaker 1: She don't want you to be close, get rid of 167 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:55,920 Speaker 1: all your female friends. Ain't you a female? So what 168 00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:58,199 Speaker 1: you're going back over that cozy and up to her fault? 169 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,160 Speaker 1: This is to fall apart. All you should do is 170 00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:05,680 Speaker 1: just be his friend. You can't be in the wedding, 171 00:10:05,720 --> 00:10:09,319 Speaker 1: but you should go to the wed but you should 172 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:12,199 Speaker 1: have a conversation to just tell you. Now, I know 173 00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:14,880 Speaker 1: it's falling on death fear, she said, but just tell her. 174 00:10:14,920 --> 00:10:16,600 Speaker 1: I'm gonna come there and be at the wedding. But 175 00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:21,000 Speaker 1: your wife don't want no more kids, you do. Your 176 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,360 Speaker 1: wife don't want you to have no more no female friends. 177 00:10:23,760 --> 00:10:27,160 Speaker 1: I'm a female, So what are you and your wife doing? 178 00:10:27,840 --> 00:10:31,520 Speaker 1: That has compatibility to it? And I don't see it. 179 00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:35,600 Speaker 1: So this is this letter, This marriage is over, just 180 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:38,520 Speaker 1: like this letter is over. Like I said, it ain't 181 00:10:38,520 --> 00:10:40,439 Speaker 1: a whole lot more I could say to anybody else, 182 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:44,320 Speaker 1: wanna say, something's here? It's a rap, Tom, This ain't 183 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:46,800 Speaker 1: gonna make it. No, he pretty much said it. It's 184 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:50,559 Speaker 1: pretty much the hell over. She was gonna be in 185 00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:56,760 Speaker 1: the wedding. What a lady grooms that's that's that's all 186 00:10:57,160 --> 00:11:04,280 Speaker 1: groom's girls, girl, lady grooms girl. Maybe she can get 187 00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:11,440 Speaker 1: on her knees and bring the rain down. Bear, Yeah, 188 00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:14,520 Speaker 1: this is gonna be a crazy marriage. But he's not 189 00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:20,400 Speaker 1: listening to anyone, so it doesn't make any sense. I mean, 190 00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:25,440 Speaker 1: what are we talking about if it's not good before 191 00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:30,080 Speaker 1: you getting married? Going to him? The part about the baby, 192 00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:33,560 Speaker 1: that's the most important thing. You want a baby and 193 00:11:33,679 --> 00:11:40,480 Speaker 1: she doesn't. Yeah, it was don't. He don't want to 194 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:44,760 Speaker 1: deal to be broken Wilde though, Bro, you're not winning 195 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:49,440 Speaker 1: in this one. You can't see your family because she 196 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:51,840 Speaker 1: wants you to spend all your time with her family, 197 00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:58,040 Speaker 1: her kids. This is what anyway, This is how the 198 00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:03,040 Speaker 1: voce has happened. It ain't thanking. Yeah, getting married for 199 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:07,360 Speaker 1: all the wrong reasons. You're right, well, but I don't 200 00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:10,800 Speaker 1: even know what what reason he's using to get married. 201 00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:16,520 Speaker 1: Um yeah, I mean she didn't say that. She just 202 00:12:16,559 --> 00:12:22,520 Speaker 1: said that he wants her in the wedding. Um, his wife. 203 00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:27,360 Speaker 1: She is whiny and selfish. And then he runs to 204 00:12:27,520 --> 00:12:30,400 Speaker 1: the to the woman who wrote this letter when it 205 00:12:30,440 --> 00:12:33,959 Speaker 1: gets too unbearable for him. So he knows. So let 206 00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 1: me guess what happened here. Okay, the wife that he's 207 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:41,760 Speaker 1: gone mad, real whiney. She the wine whole way up 208 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:45,120 Speaker 1: on the proposal. U huh. Now he finning go through 209 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:50,160 Speaker 1: with it, just to stop the whine to shut her up. Boy, 210 00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:53,200 Speaker 1: you find get up in some hell here, and y'all 211 00:12:53,200 --> 00:13:02,320 Speaker 1: call me stup. It's a folk got me beat, all right? Listen, 212 00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:04,680 Speaker 1: we got to wait this time. The stupid though tim 213 00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:08,560 Speaker 1: coming up at forty six minutes after the hour, Sports 214 00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:12,079 Speaker 1: Talk was junior right after this. You're listening to this 215 00:13:12,320 --> 00:13:13,679 Speaker 1: day Harvey Morning Show.