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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Therapy for Black Girls Podcast, a weekly

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Speaker 1: conversation about mental health, personal development, and all the small

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Speaker 1: decisions we can make to become the best possible versions

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Speaker 1: of ourselves. I'm your host, doctor joy Hard and Bradford,

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Speaker 1: a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia. For more information or

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Speaker 1: to find a therapist in your area, visit our website

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Speaker 1: at Therapy for Blackgirls dot com. While I hope you

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Speaker 1: love listening to and learning from the podcast, it is

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Speaker 1: not meant to be a substitute for a relationship with

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Speaker 1: a licensed mental health professional. Hey, y'all, thanks so much

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Speaker 1: for joining me for session four thirty six of the

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Speaker 1: Therapy for Black Girls Podcast. We'll get right into our

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Speaker 1: conversation after a word from our sponsors. Welcome back to

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Speaker 1: another episode of our Siblings Sit Down series. I hope

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Speaker 1: you've been enjoying it so far. We've answered questions about siblings,

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Speaker 1: broken down various sibling dynamics, so it's only right that

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Speaker 1: we now sit down to chat with some actual siblings.

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Speaker 1: This week, I'm excited to welcome Skyler Marshe and Sunland Shariah,

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Speaker 1: a sister duo finding new ways to learn and love

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Speaker 1: each other. We discuss the evolution of their relationship, the

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Speaker 1: relationship with the rest of their siblings, explore how they

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Speaker 1: resolve conflict, and get into what it really means to

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Speaker 1: grow alongside someone who's seen every version of you, from

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Speaker 1: childhood memories to creative projects. Skyler and Sunland open up

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Speaker 1: about the joys and challenges of sisterhood, how communication has

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Speaker 1: transformed their bond, and what they've learned about giving each

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Speaker 1: other grace. If something resonates with you while enjoying our conversation,

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Speaker 1: please share with us on social media using the hashtag

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Speaker 1: tpg in session, or join us over in our Patreon

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Speaker 1: channel To talk more about the episode. You can join

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Speaker 1: us at community dot therapy for Blackgirls dot com. Here's

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Speaker 1: our conversation. Well, I am so excited today to be

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Speaker 1: joined by Sunlon and Skyler. Thank you so much for

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Speaker 1: joining me today.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for having us feel we're gonna say a

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Speaker 2: lot of the same things at the same.

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Speaker 1: Time, already already with the sibling energy we love to

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Speaker 1: see it. So Sunln, please introduce yourself for people who

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Speaker 1: may not be aware of who you are.

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Speaker 3: Hi, everybody, my name is Sulon Shariah. I'm a comic

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Speaker 3: creowner or DJ. I almost sad student, but I just

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Speaker 3: finished my masters two weeks ago, so recent administration graduate.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, most was Howard from Howard.

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Speaker 1: Let me lead with that, And what about you, Skyler?

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Speaker 2: I'm Skyler Marche. I am a content creator as well

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Speaker 2: also a storyteller, dreamer. I like to lead with those

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Speaker 2: because that's kind of what what motivates me and inspires

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Speaker 2: me to work at all, because I don't dream work,

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Speaker 2: but I do love to dream. And I also do

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Speaker 2: creative strategy, so I work with brands who are eager

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Speaker 2: to be more inclusive to audiences, and we're kind of

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Speaker 2: working across platforms when it comes to storytelling and helping

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Speaker 2: smaller black brands communicate their ethos. So a bunch of

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Speaker 2: myriad of things. But and then more recently, I've been

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Speaker 2: doing a lot of creative direction, trying to break into it,

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Speaker 2: and been working with someone to do a series called

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Speaker 2: Set where I do creative direction and she DJs and

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Speaker 2: we've kind of brought those two worlds together. So this

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Speaker 2: is very full circle for us to now be doing

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Speaker 2: this together too.

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Speaker 1: I love that. I love that. So tell me a

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Speaker 1: little bit about your upbringing. Where did you grow up,

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Speaker 1: what does the sibling set look like in your household?

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Speaker 2: Well, we grew up in Atlanta, Georgia. Well, actually not

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Speaker 2: Atlanta proper. We grew up in Stockbridge, Georgia, and then

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Speaker 2: Conyer's and all over. But our siblings, semin will support me. Here.

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Speaker 2: There's four girls and a boy, right, yeah, okay, there's

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Speaker 2: so many of us running around. I'm the oldest. I'm

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Speaker 2: twenty eight. Someone is twenty.

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Speaker 3: Twenty four, are young twenty two.

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Speaker 2: I struggle. I struggle.

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Speaker 3: So Lani is sixteen, and then the baby who's not

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Speaker 3: a baby anymore.

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Speaker 2: Summer she's thirteen, she's teener, and now she's still grown.

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Speaker 2: Now we're older, she's a teenager. Now it's five of us,

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Speaker 2: and so it's a little unit that we have all together.

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Speaker 2: We grew up in the same area more or less,

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Speaker 2: and because we have these difference in ages, like I

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Speaker 2: then went to college, I came to New York. Someon's

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Speaker 2: in BC, and then the rest of our siblings are

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Speaker 2: back home in Atlanta. But yeah, I mean, we grew

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Speaker 2: up with family being a really big part of our lives.

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Speaker 2: And I think as siblings we were naturally I think

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Speaker 2: we had our moments I was saying before we started

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Speaker 2: that someone says I bullied her when we were younger.

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Speaker 2: I don't recall. I always remember being obsessed with her.

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Speaker 2: I don't meant to write.

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Speaker 3: A passage thing, you know, like the older sister, younger sister.

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Speaker 2: You're annoying, You're annoyed.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I'm sure, but now I'm obsessed.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it turned around. It turned around, and I think,

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Speaker 2: like our mom was so big on us leaning on

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Speaker 2: each other. I mean, even with our dad. It was

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Speaker 2: the opposite of maybe what other siblings are used to,

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Speaker 2: where it's like you're snitching on each other or trying

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Speaker 2: to see who can get who in trouble. Our dad

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Speaker 2: told us, as we snitched on somebody, all of us

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Speaker 2: got in trouble. So we kind of been together at

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Speaker 2: a very young age and leaned into each other. And

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Speaker 2: then as we've gotten older, I think we chose each

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Speaker 2: other in a different way where you know, we were

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Speaker 2: thrown together at first, and now we were like banding

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Speaker 2: together because we truly love each other, and I think

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Speaker 2: we get along really, really well. So yeah, that's kind

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Speaker 2: of like a little bit of the background.

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Speaker 1: I love that. I love this so Skyla you were

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Speaker 1: the big sister of the group, it sounds like, and

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Speaker 1: so of course you're recollect of that as an adult

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Speaker 1: is very different than it sounds like. Brayvie was the

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Speaker 1: actuality of it. As you know a child, what do

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Speaker 1: you remember about like being the oldest sibling in such

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Speaker 1: a large sibling set.

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Speaker 2: It's so interesting how people talk about how they get

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Speaker 2: different parents. They end up interacting with their parents in

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Speaker 2: a completely different way. And I'd say that as we've

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Speaker 2: gotten older, I realized that, like my parents were very well,

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Speaker 2: not super strict, but pretty strict with me, and because

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Speaker 2: they were learning and it was their first time with me,

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Speaker 2: as it was my first time with them, you know,

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Speaker 2: in life, we were all figuring it out together. And

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Speaker 2: I think that with sun Lynn and Gregory and some

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Speaker 2: are in Lannie, it just felt that they were also

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Speaker 2: kind of my kids too, because I was a little

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Speaker 2: bit older someone and I have about four or five

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Speaker 2: years between us, and so when she was born, I

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Speaker 2: just remember being so protected in my mind of her,

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Speaker 2: and I think we dealt with a lot of childhood

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Speaker 2: traumas growing up that I was trying my hardest to

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Speaker 2: separate them from or distance them from that I think

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Speaker 2: I was a little bit more aware of that they

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Speaker 2: weren't as aware of, and I was trying to make

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Speaker 2: sure to. I kind of fell into this protector role

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Speaker 2: very quick with them, which is why it's so funny

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Speaker 2: that I also had time to be ignored with someone.

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Speaker 2: But I think, like when we were allowed to the sisters,

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Speaker 2: it came up. But yeah, I think that that me

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Speaker 2: being an older sister is a big part of who

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Speaker 2: I am now, sometimes to my detriment, but it is

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Speaker 2: so much of the you know, the reason that I

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Speaker 2: love as hard as I do, and I'd take them

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Speaker 2: as seriously like the relationship I have in the role

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Speaker 2: I play in their life as seriously as I do,

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Speaker 2: because I think that I saw how impressionable I was

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Speaker 2: at a really young age, and I wanted to make

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Speaker 2: sure that, you know, as I've gotten older, I've kind

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Speaker 2: of created a space for them to walk into that

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Speaker 2: feels like a soft place to land. But I think

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Speaker 2: with my parents, yeah, it was it was a learning curve.

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Speaker 2: I think they were much more laxed with someone than

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Speaker 2: probably me, and I love that because I think that

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Speaker 2: it allows someone to stretch her legs a little bit

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Speaker 2: more whereas I was I think, very serious from a

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Speaker 2: very young age because of all the rules I was

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Speaker 2: up against. I mean, my mom is an immigrant from Barbados,

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Speaker 2: and then my dad comes from also a pretty strict background,

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Speaker 2: my stepdad as well, So yeah, it was it was

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Speaker 2: a big difference from how our youngest sibling, Summer is

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Speaker 2: living now. She has so much agency in the household

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Speaker 2: versus where I think I was kind of just trying

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Speaker 2: to play by the rules, and then someone came along

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Speaker 2: and broke all the rules too, because she saw it

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Speaker 2: was too many. There's too many rules, and she was

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Speaker 2: over it. So something.

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Speaker 1: What do you remember about your experience because you weren't

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Speaker 1: the oldest, but in some ways, like after Skylar was

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Speaker 1: out of the house, and you probably did step into

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Speaker 1: that oldest sister role for your younger siblings. So what

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Speaker 1: is your recollection of your growing up in the house.

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Speaker 3: It's always been tricky being in the middle because I'm

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Speaker 3: Lily right in the middle. Like there's like two three

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Speaker 3: younger two three order if you count our step siblings.

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Speaker 3: It was hard trying not to like bump heads too

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Speaker 3: much with my younger siblings because I have to remind

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Speaker 3: myself like they're looking up to you. You have to

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Speaker 3: be like the bigger person in some situations.

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Speaker 2: And I was tricky.

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Speaker 3: Because like I'm a little stubborn, like I'll argue them down.

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Speaker 3: Even when Summer was as far as she could talk,

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Speaker 3: we would we would go at it. But I'm like, Okay,

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Speaker 3: let me be serious, because like I have to like

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Speaker 3: them in a way, I have to be I'm like,

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Speaker 3: all right, I do remember I took a lot of

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Speaker 3: notes from how Skyler handled a lot of things, Like

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Speaker 3: she said she was protecting us from a lot, and

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Speaker 3: in the moment, I didn't really realize it, but like

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Speaker 3: hindsight now looking back, I'm like, you.

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Speaker 2: Know we were paying we bowling.

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Speaker 3: A lot, like what she Yeah, because why I'm be

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Speaker 3: doing that every night? But now I know, like she

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Speaker 3: was doing things for a reason, And I understand, Like

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Speaker 3: I said, the big sister younger sister trope, we're like

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Speaker 3: the younger sisters getting on the older sister. There, she

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Speaker 3: was carrying a lot, so for b to b pesky,

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Speaker 3: I guess I understand like why we would bump heads.

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Speaker 3: But for the most part, I feel like I did

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Speaker 3: have like a pretty decent childhood. I think Skyler helped

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Speaker 3: a lot in that, and like protecting us from a

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Speaker 3: lot we're too young to understand or really be like

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Speaker 3: disposed to.

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Speaker 2: So from what I remember, things were pretty good. I

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Speaker 2: love that pre.

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Speaker 1: And you I have mentioned that as adults, right, Like,

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Speaker 1: of course, there's the experience of growing up and kind

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Speaker 1: of feeling like, Okay, I have to be into this

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Speaker 1: person because they're my sibling. But I do think it

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Speaker 1: is a very conscious choice to say I still want

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Speaker 1: to spend time with my sibling as an adult. What

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Speaker 1: kinds of things do you feel like your parents did

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Speaker 1: to really make it so that you do feel interested in,

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Speaker 1: like excited to spend time with one another as adults.

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Speaker 3: Maybe I'm wrong, maybe you know something, but I don't

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Speaker 3: know if they did anything specifically, Like I genuinely feel

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Speaker 3: like it's a conscious decision on our own that we

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Speaker 3: want to hang out with each other.

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Speaker 2: I don't think they ever really like set.

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Speaker 3: Up things where we would be spending time with each other.

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Speaker 2: It's like we lived together, so like, yeah, I think,

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Speaker 2: I mean, there's that term if you're a living room

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Speaker 2: kid or a bedroom kid, and I think we were

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Speaker 2: definitely living room kids. I mean, my mom brought so

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Speaker 2: much warmth to the house, and she was always sorting

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Speaker 2: things out, like she wanted to do game days, or

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Speaker 2: we would go outside and drum out on trampoline and

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Speaker 2: play in the pool. And I think and I saw

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Speaker 2: our dad was such a kid as well in his heart,

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Speaker 2: So I think they created a space that sparked a

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Speaker 2: lot of joy for us. And then I think that

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Speaker 2: it was just a shared kind of communal space that

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Speaker 2: they created and we leaned into each other there. I

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Speaker 2: think that we had our own friends in relationship we

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Speaker 2: were trying to build and lean into that. I think

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Speaker 2: that we weren't as aware of the ways in which

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Speaker 2: we were together a lot. And then I think once

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Speaker 2: we weren't able to be which is hot it goes

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Speaker 2: you don't know until you don't. You look back and

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Speaker 2: you reflect on it. But now that we're further away

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Speaker 2: or we can't be together all the time, we are like,

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Speaker 2: oh my gosh, there's so many moments that we wish

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Speaker 2: we leaned into. And there are so many videos from

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Speaker 2: our childhood that show us singing together and playing together,

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Speaker 2: and we had I think our dad encouraged so much

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Speaker 2: daydreaming in our childhood for us to lean into together.

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Speaker 2: I can't say if it was intentional, but I think

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Speaker 2: that naturally it was the kind of culmination of those efforts,

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Speaker 2: and we kind of, you know, are super appreciative of

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Speaker 2: it now because it's kind of led us to where

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Speaker 2: we are today.

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Speaker 1: Is Yeah, something? Is there a personality trade about Skyler

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Speaker 1: that you feel like you have seen from childhood and

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Speaker 1: it still shows up in who she is as an adult?

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Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, yes, How where would I use? But

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna say it all the time I've told her before.

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Speaker 3: I guess I'll say like dependency, Like people can depend

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Speaker 3: on her, Like if anybody needs some kind of advice,

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Speaker 3: they will go to her. And I remember that from

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Speaker 3: when I was in like middle school and I'm getting

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Speaker 3: picked up from school by my mom and scholars in

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Speaker 3: the passenger seat and she's like, yeah, my friend asked

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Speaker 3: me what to do about it and genuinely had good

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Speaker 3: advice to give.

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Speaker 2: At like teen years old, I'm in.

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Speaker 3: The back seat, like how does she know all these things?

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Speaker 3: Like how did she stays for so many different people

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Speaker 3: in so many different situations? And to this day, that's

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Speaker 3: still something that I think she's really like strong in thanks.

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Speaker 1: You see you seem so far about that, Skyler.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. Again, being a big sister is

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Speaker 2: a big part of my personality, and so I'm like,

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Speaker 2: you love me, but I know she does. I know

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Speaker 2: she does. I literally love. I love my siblings so

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Speaker 2: much so anytime that they give me any kind of praise,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, really, And I think that's why it doesn't stick,

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Speaker 2: you know, and it's always a surprise. But I think

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Speaker 2: that's so cool that she thinks that because I never

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Speaker 2: actually thought that of myself. I know that I love

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Speaker 2: to be there for the people I love, but it's

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Speaker 2: so cool that that's something that she called out. I'm

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Speaker 2: not sure gonna say how like type A I can be.

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Speaker 2: So that made me no need to get crazy ez.

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Speaker 2: So what about you, Skyler?

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Speaker 1: Is there a personality trade from something that you feel

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Speaker 1: like you've seen through childhood and who she is as

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Speaker 1: an adult.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, it's just been so cool to see the pieces

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Speaker 2: of someone that have like inspired me to be the

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Speaker 2: woman I am now. And a big one of those

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Speaker 2: pieces is like the agency she has over her life.

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Speaker 2: Like Sunland is the main character in her story and

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Speaker 2: she wears it so beautifully, Like she will walk into

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Speaker 2: a room and it's hers, and she will pick up

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Speaker 2: a project and she is so good at it. I

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Speaker 2: think that, like we talk a lot, how many side

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Speaker 2: quests she has in her life, Like she'll just pay

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Speaker 2: up a hobby or a passion or a friend who

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Speaker 2: you know she ran into on the street, and like

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Speaker 2: make an entire new world out of it. And I

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Speaker 2: think that's been pretty consistent from the time were owned,

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Speaker 2: where she was just like so loud and took up

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Speaker 2: so much space in a way that I was often

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Speaker 2: timid to so, I think because I was like, no,

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Speaker 2: they are rules and I need to follow them. We

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Speaker 2: used to make front of her being our habitual line stepper,

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Speaker 2: like she'd see the line, she walk over it. She

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Speaker 2: likes to know where it is, but she walks over it.

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Speaker 2: I'll see the line and I'm right there by it.

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Speaker 2: And so I think that inspired me beyond what I

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Speaker 2: could have thought, whichause now as an adult, I realized, Okay,

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Speaker 2: well I'm an adult. I get to make the rules,

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Speaker 2: and I don't have to be so boxed in, and

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Speaker 2: I don't have to be so serious. I can be

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Speaker 2: a little bit more fluid, and I think some fluidity

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Speaker 2: has been consistent from the time she was super, super young,

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Speaker 2: and I think she just came and kicking and screaming

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Speaker 2: in a way that I have always admired.

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Speaker 1: What's it like to hear that something I haven't heard?

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Speaker 2: Habitual line stuffer in so long?

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Speaker 3: Bring back memory, because our parents did used to call

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Speaker 3: me that, Like I remember pretty often when I would

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Speaker 3: be getting in trouble for something, they would be like,

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Speaker 3: and you knew where the line was.

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Speaker 2: And you cross it. But it's a beautiful day. You're

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Speaker 2: used it.

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Speaker 3: Oh, you can't put me in a box, right, exactly.

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Speaker 3: Love that I gotta figure out what's outside of the

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Speaker 3: box at all time.

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Speaker 1: Fayler, several times you have talked specifically about your dad

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Speaker 1: and kind of encouraging daydreaming, and it feels like it

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Speaker 1: is not a surprise that both of you are like

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Speaker 1: very big creatives, right and kind of just.

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Speaker 2: Feel free to play.

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Speaker 1: And can you talk more about like the daydreaming and

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Speaker 1: how you feel like that has shown up now in

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Speaker 1: your adult life.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure. I think that one of the things

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Speaker 2: I loved a lot about our childhood was our parents

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Speaker 2: allowed us to get bored and to just be bored

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Speaker 2: for a long time, and I think in the boredom

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Speaker 2: we created so much. Also, like we weren't big TV.

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Speaker 2: I mean, we did have the we when we were

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Speaker 2: a little bit older, but I think we didn't have

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Speaker 2: a lot of technology. So we were creating worlds often

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Speaker 2: to stay awake, to stay like engaged, and so I

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Speaker 2: think that I mean, whether it was our dad making

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Speaker 2: like sock cuppets out of his hand or us coming

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Speaker 2: up like creating a stage and you know, our parents'

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Speaker 2: bedroom and doing an entire performance. I think we did

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Speaker 2: a whole YouTube video to Seelow Green and we had

348
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Speaker 2: to put on a show. I think they've always encouraged,

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Speaker 2: especially when it comes to like the arts. I was

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Speaker 2: in theater. I also did hip hop and jazz. Someone

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Speaker 2: and I did that let together, and whenever we aspire

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Speaker 2: to express ourselves, that was encouraged. And I think the

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Speaker 2: ability to create without boundaries completely like created my RELI

354
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Speaker 2: or said, the foundation for my relationship with creation. Now

355
00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:46,440
Speaker 2: where when I came to New York to go to

356
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Speaker 2: Parsons for fashion design, I didn't really know what a

357
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Speaker 2: feeling was because my dad didn't really He never articulated

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Speaker 2: that until I think I got to college and I

359
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Speaker 2: was like, oh wait. I think that was when I

360
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Speaker 2: was like, my blackness is I'm feeling it more because

361
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:01,520
Speaker 2: we were up in a community where we were surrounded

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Speaker 2: by black people and it was very warm and welcoming,

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Speaker 2: and it wasn't until I was in different spaces that

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Speaker 2: I felt the difference of that, And so I think

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Speaker 2: that it created it. It was it was good and bad,

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Speaker 2: like it was a slap in the face, like, oh,

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Speaker 2: the world is here, and now I need to kind

368
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Speaker 2: of contend with it, and rather than having my head

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Speaker 2: into clouds, I also need to have my feet firmly

370
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Speaker 2: planted so I can be aware. But then also it

371
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Speaker 2: allowed me to move in a way where I wasn't

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Speaker 2: as constricted, I think, and I think that that's shown

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Speaker 2: up with not only the ways that someone and I

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Speaker 2: have perceived the world as black women, but then also

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Speaker 2: how we've taken on creative endeavors. I worked in fashion

376
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Speaker 2: and now I'm doing contact creation and creative strategy. Someone

377
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Speaker 2: is now picked up DJing and I mean honestly, anything

378
00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:43,960
Speaker 2: she puts her mind to, she's hair, makeup, beauty, like

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Speaker 2: all the things. And so I think our dad and

380
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Speaker 2: our mom instilled so much of that in us to

381
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Speaker 2: dream as big as possible all the time. If you

382
00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:52,879
Speaker 2: went in here, you can win out there. And so

383
00:17:53,040 --> 00:17:55,639
Speaker 2: much of the world we were creating existed in our

384
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Speaker 2: heads first before we saw them manifested.

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Speaker 1: What about you, someone, any kind of distinct memories that

386
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Speaker 1: you feel like really have contributed to you becoming the

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Speaker 1: creative person that you are.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I will say they did give us a lot

389
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Speaker 3: of space to get creative. Like I know with birthdays,

390
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Speaker 3: they would be like, here, we're gonna give y'all twenty

391
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Speaker 3: dollars for your mom's birthday. Figure out what you're gonna do,

392
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Speaker 3: and we would stretch that twenty dollars. Ye, a candle,

393
00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:22,760
Speaker 3: a lotion. We're setting up a spa for her. Skylar

394
00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:26,399
Speaker 3: had us creating like restaurants in our house with a

395
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Speaker 3: full menu. We will wearing suits like a little bow

396
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Speaker 3: and tie and everything, making dinner.

397
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Speaker 2: She was cookie.

398
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Speaker 3: We were serving our mom for like Mother's Day. It

399
00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:37,920
Speaker 3: was never a dull moment, honestly, like when she said

400
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:40,240
Speaker 3: we had time to get bored, it was never for long,

401
00:18:40,359 --> 00:18:42,359
Speaker 3: Like we would always figure out something to do and

402
00:18:42,400 --> 00:18:44,679
Speaker 3: then like even if it's me go and hang out

403
00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:46,840
Speaker 3: with our younger brother, who's obviously a boy.

404
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,480
Speaker 2: He's different, he plays different.

405
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:52,240
Speaker 3: I'm playing with race cars and bay blades, and we're still.

406
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:54,159
Speaker 2: Just having a great time. Like I don't know.

407
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,840
Speaker 3: They gave us a lot of freedom to figure things out,

408
00:18:56,840 --> 00:19:00,119
Speaker 3: while also I think my dad did try to and

409
00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:01,960
Speaker 3: still like plan a lot of little seeds for me,

410
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 3: for like navigating the real world outside of like the

411
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:07,280
Speaker 3: imaginary and the whimsie that we had in the house,

412
00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:10,200
Speaker 3: like I'm a cancer. And he would always be very

413
00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,960
Speaker 3: specific in telling me, like you're at crab you have

414
00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:15,680
Speaker 3: a hard outside and a soft inside. Don't let anybody

415
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Speaker 3: get to your soft inside because some people will try

416
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:19,359
Speaker 3: to push your buttons and.

417
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:21,440
Speaker 2: Get to you. And he would like, you know, he drop.

418
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Speaker 3: Some gems here and there, so like, you know, encourage

419
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:26,520
Speaker 3: us to be creative, but also like keep your guard

420
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Speaker 3: up and know that like, yeah, you can be creative

421
00:19:29,720 --> 00:19:32,120
Speaker 3: and having fun at home.

422
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Speaker 2: But in the real world things might be a little

423
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Speaker 2: bit different.

424
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Speaker 3: They've a lot of things that contributed to how like

425
00:19:37,240 --> 00:19:40,840
Speaker 3: creative and silly we are, Like even holidays. To this day,

426
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:45,280
Speaker 3: my mom will decorate work and home for any holiday, Halloween,

427
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:48,679
Speaker 3: there's pumpkins, there's scarecrows all over the house, outside the

428
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:52,160
Speaker 3: house Christmas, Loki, you can't tell me today that Santa

429
00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:53,560
Speaker 3: is not real, because Santa was.

430
00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:57,400
Speaker 2: We can put a lot of effort into Santa.

431
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,680
Speaker 3: Little cookies, and while we were sleeping, they would write

432
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:02,800
Speaker 3: us a letter from Santa and it would be like oh, Sumons,

433
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:04,400
Speaker 3: Like Becky, we're so proud of you.

434
00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:07,120
Speaker 2: Here's your gifts from Sant And we're like, oh my god.

435
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:11,240
Speaker 3: And he loved our cookies. Like we had so much

436
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:15,679
Speaker 3: of an imaginative childhood, So I can definitely contribute to

437
00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:19,320
Speaker 3: how our mind like there's no limit to the things

438
00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:21,080
Speaker 3: that we could think of and create.

439
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:23,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think our mom also instilled in us

440
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,199
Speaker 2: so much of how she lives her life is in

441
00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:29,200
Speaker 2: kind of service to others in a really beautiful way.

442
00:20:29,320 --> 00:20:32,359
Speaker 2: She gives so much of herself and lends herself to

443
00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:35,199
Speaker 2: different communities and spaces and the people she loves. And

444
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:37,320
Speaker 2: so every time that we were creating or doing something

445
00:20:37,320 --> 00:20:40,480
Speaker 2: with intention, I think we naturally picked up from our mother. Okay,

446
00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:43,159
Speaker 2: how can this lend itself to someone else? Or how

447
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,840
Speaker 2: can this pour back into someone else? And even to

448
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:48,359
Speaker 2: this day, when I create something, she's asking me, have

449
00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:50,800
Speaker 2: you given back to the community, or is there a

450
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:53,119
Speaker 2: way that you can use this to pour into someone

451
00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:55,159
Speaker 2: or can someone see themselves in this in a beautiful way.

452
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:57,520
Speaker 2: I think she always challenges me to push it a

453
00:20:57,560 --> 00:20:59,840
Speaker 2: little bit further and to be as giving as a

454
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:01,720
Speaker 2: possibly can. And I think that in the work that

455
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:04,240
Speaker 2: we've done we've tried to be reflective as well in

456
00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:06,480
Speaker 2: that way too, because our mother was such a big

457
00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:09,560
Speaker 2: part of our joys as children, and we realized as

458
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,399
Speaker 2: we got older it's her selflessness that showed up so

459
00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:14,280
Speaker 2: much in those moments that I think we've tried to

460
00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:15,080
Speaker 2: take with us as well.

461
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:29,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, more from our conversation after the break something. Can

462
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:31,800
Speaker 1: you think of any moment or experience in particular that

463
00:21:31,840 --> 00:21:34,440
Speaker 1: you feel like really deep into your relationship with Skyler.

464
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:37,120
Speaker 3: I think it was honestly, after she went to college

465
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:41,399
Speaker 3: and I was feeling not neglected, but there was like

466
00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:44,320
Speaker 3: the pressure of like our parents being like, you need

467
00:21:44,359 --> 00:21:46,680
Speaker 3: to be more like your sister because now like you're

468
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:49,960
Speaker 3: the head hunchhol basically she's at school, you're the oldest

469
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:52,600
Speaker 3: sibling in the house. So I think going through that

470
00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:55,240
Speaker 3: and like leaning on her like I can't be you,

471
00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:57,160
Speaker 3: and she's like, well, duh, Like I know.

472
00:21:57,160 --> 00:21:59,120
Speaker 2: That, but you're you and that's just as good.

473
00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:01,639
Speaker 3: Through that, I think we got a lot closer, And

474
00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:03,480
Speaker 3: like me looking at her for advice to give to

475
00:22:03,520 --> 00:22:06,360
Speaker 3: my younger siblings, and I was like, what fifteen when

476
00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:09,320
Speaker 3: you left fifteen sixties, what am I supposed to do

477
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:12,400
Speaker 3: to lead these kids? So I think, yeah, just being

478
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:14,640
Speaker 3: realistic with her, I've always been very honest and open

479
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:16,679
Speaker 3: with her about like what I'm capable of, what I

480
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,159
Speaker 3: can it can't do, and she would always feel that

481
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:22,080
Speaker 3: space and like help me navigate whatever the situation was.

482
00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:25,280
Speaker 1: Skyler, any moment or experience for you that you think

483
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:26,719
Speaker 1: really deepened your relationship.

484
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,119
Speaker 2: I'm so glad that you kind of pushed back against that.

485
00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:32,040
Speaker 2: We're so different. So when she told us that she

486
00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:34,000
Speaker 2: was being compared to me, I said, how we're so good, Like,

487
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:36,760
Speaker 2: there's no way we're the opposite side. We're on the

488
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:38,800
Speaker 2: same coin, opposite side, So it was just no way.

489
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:41,159
Speaker 2: And I think that by doing that, she spread her

490
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:43,400
Speaker 2: wings in such a beautiful way to the point that

491
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:46,600
Speaker 2: in us being same coin, opposite sides, we do but

492
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:49,080
Speaker 2: heads because we can see the world in a very

493
00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:51,600
Speaker 2: different way sometimes and often it'll a line, but then

494
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:53,800
Speaker 2: sometimes it doesn't. And I think the first time in

495
00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:55,960
Speaker 2: my adulthood that I felt super close to someone was

496
00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,480
Speaker 2: going to be had a huge argument in Japan. I

497
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:00,520
Speaker 2: didn't know if you knew it, I knew it.

498
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:03,960
Speaker 3: We had a huge argument.

499
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:07,280
Speaker 2: It was so raw because it was so emotional, and

500
00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:09,199
Speaker 2: we just were like laying a lot. Oh, we had

501
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 2: to take meet. But I think that after we you know,

502
00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:15,000
Speaker 2: were upset, and we let the feelings settle. The next

503
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:16,879
Speaker 2: day I went to her and I was like, at

504
00:23:16,920 --> 00:23:18,440
Speaker 2: the end of the day, I choose you when I'm

505
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:19,919
Speaker 2: always going to choose you, and I just want us

506
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:21,480
Speaker 2: to learn how to love each other better. And I

507
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:24,040
Speaker 2: think that moment was so important for us because we

508
00:23:24,119 --> 00:23:26,320
Speaker 2: knew we were choosing each other as adults. But I

509
00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:29,959
Speaker 2: think in those moments of contention, when things aren't sweet,

510
00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 2: you're like, Okay, you're my person, and this is an

511
00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:35,840
Speaker 2: endless love just because we're up against this thing. We're

512
00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:37,480
Speaker 2: up against this thing. And I think we think about

513
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:40,040
Speaker 2: that when it comes to relationships with partners, but with

514
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,080
Speaker 2: your siblings as well. When these issues arid and we

515
00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:44,719
Speaker 2: have to join forces to attack it and understand how

516
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:46,080
Speaker 2: to get back on the same page. And I think

517
00:23:46,119 --> 00:23:48,639
Speaker 2: both of us in that moment we were angry and

518
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,280
Speaker 2: upset because we were hurt, and we were trying to

519
00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:53,440
Speaker 2: hide our cards and being hurt, like, oh, you've hurt

520
00:23:53,480 --> 00:23:55,520
Speaker 2: my feelings. But I think in us kind of putting

521
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:57,200
Speaker 2: it all out there and say, oh, you've hurt my feelings,

522
00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:59,359
Speaker 2: how can I few it better for you? And I

523
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,679
Speaker 2: told her that moment, I was like, at the end

524
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:03,000
Speaker 2: of the day, I'm always going to choose to be

525
00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:04,480
Speaker 2: a better big sister to you. I'm never going to

526
00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:07,560
Speaker 2: not choose you. So even if you're angry or hur

527
00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:09,359
Speaker 2: you can be angry or hurt and it might not

528
00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:11,840
Speaker 2: look pretty, but I'll be here and vice versa. I

529
00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:14,720
Speaker 2: know that she'll always choose me and my imperfections. And

530
00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:17,399
Speaker 2: I think saying it out loud was a huge shift

531
00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 2: for our relationship because I think we've always been really

532
00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:22,040
Speaker 2: open with each other because we're siblings. But I think

533
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:24,679
Speaker 2: it's a bit different when you start to choose each

534
00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:26,560
Speaker 2: other as friends as well. Like it felt like a

535
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:29,399
Speaker 2: shift in our relationship where now someone has become one

536
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:32,879
Speaker 2: of my best friends that I've brought in even closer,

537
00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:35,600
Speaker 2: and you know, started to build this relationship with as

538
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:37,480
Speaker 2: I have the other women in my life who were

539
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:40,200
Speaker 2: not my blood. So yeah, that was such a huge moment.

540
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:42,760
Speaker 2: Also because I can as an Aquarius, I tend to

541
00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:45,040
Speaker 2: be a little bit withdrawn when I'm hurt, and I

542
00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:49,280
Speaker 2: also struggle with conflict in some circumstances, and I've had

543
00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:51,040
Speaker 2: to learn that things can be a little bit uglier

544
00:24:51,080 --> 00:24:53,040
Speaker 2: and I don't have to present as okay and people

545
00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:55,560
Speaker 2: will still choose me. And I know someone has always

546
00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:57,919
Speaker 2: chosen me, even before I was aware of those things.

547
00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:01,080
Speaker 2: So yeah, I think that moment was a huge one

548
00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:02,760
Speaker 2: for us, and it didn't feel good at first, but

549
00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:05,959
Speaker 2: then it felt really good after prepared, our repair had

550
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:08,720
Speaker 2: gotten significantly better in our older age, I'd say.

551
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:10,640
Speaker 1: So suddenly, it sounds like you knew this Japan fight

552
00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:14,040
Speaker 1: was gonna come up in this conversation somehow. Is there

553
00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:16,439
Speaker 1: anything that you feel like you want to talk about

554
00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:18,600
Speaker 1: related to that experience and how it kind of has

555
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:20,199
Speaker 1: shaped your relationship with one another?

556
00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:23,240
Speaker 3: Like it's not funny obviously, Like we were actually arguing

557
00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:25,520
Speaker 3: in like tensions are high, but like, looking back on it,

558
00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:27,400
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh my god, Like a lot of it

559
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:31,600
Speaker 3: was like just miscommunication and misunderstanding kind of how we

560
00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:35,639
Speaker 3: are showing up differently as adults, like we might react

561
00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:38,879
Speaker 3: to things differently when we were younger, and she was

562
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:42,000
Speaker 3: just I think, taking things personally that I didn't want

563
00:25:42,119 --> 00:25:43,920
Speaker 3: to be taken personally, like it was my first time

564
00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:46,720
Speaker 3: in Japan. She loved Japan, She's been there a million times,

565
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:48,880
Speaker 3: and she was just trying so hard to make sure

566
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:51,200
Speaker 3: that I was having a good time and then introverted me.

567
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 3: I could have a great time and I'm just sitting

568
00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:55,560
Speaker 3: there chilling. So she's kind of like freaking out, like,

569
00:25:55,560 --> 00:25:57,359
Speaker 3: oh she's not having fun, and I'm like.

570
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,760
Speaker 2: Calm down, like, guess I have it. It's just like

571
00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:06,480
Speaker 2: it was explodrivious. I was over stimulating her. She was like, girl, please, sorry,

572
00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:08,240
Speaker 2: I care so much, and I'm like what.

573
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 3: It was?

574
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:13,440
Speaker 2: Literally, it was one of those moments where like things

575
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:17,080
Speaker 2: from our younger self showed up in the conversation. We

576
00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:19,239
Speaker 2: let them get a few little comments off, but then

577
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:21,199
Speaker 2: we both had to sit them down and go, Okay, well,

578
00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:24,200
Speaker 2: how can our present day self show up and protect

579
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:27,560
Speaker 2: those younger selves and bring their concerns to the forefront.

580
00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:30,480
Speaker 2: But it definitely was just a matter of me being

581
00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:35,240
Speaker 2: overbearing and then someone being overstimulated and us not knowing

582
00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:38,119
Speaker 2: how to communicate our expectations to each other. And I

583
00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:41,199
Speaker 2: think now we know, okay, well, how can we be

584
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:44,040
Speaker 2: more mindful of those things in order to honor each

585
00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:47,040
Speaker 2: other's space, because both of us were weren't kind of

586
00:26:47,119 --> 00:26:48,800
Speaker 2: doing that in that moment, and I think it was

587
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:50,520
Speaker 2: such a Yeah, it was. It was beautiful and it

588
00:26:50,560 --> 00:26:52,520
Speaker 2: was also silly. It is silly when you don't know

589
00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:54,600
Speaker 2: how to communicate. Honestly, I say it all the time.

590
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:57,240
Speaker 2: But I've been in therapy and couples therapy for about

591
00:26:57,280 --> 00:26:59,640
Speaker 2: six years now, and if I could be in therapy

592
00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 2: with every in my life, I would because we all

593
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:06,080
Speaker 2: just communicate so different. And it's such a beautiful thing

594
00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:08,320
Speaker 2: when you can find the common ground and you're not

595
00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 2: seeking to change each other, but just find a different

596
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:12,880
Speaker 2: means of getting from A to B with each other.

597
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:15,480
Speaker 2: And that was definitely we learned it the hard way,

598
00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 2: but it was a beautiful way to figure it out,

599
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:18,280
Speaker 2: I think.

600
00:27:19,240 --> 00:27:22,600
Speaker 1: And you know, upon reflection, right hindsight, we can talk

601
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 1: about it. But in hindsight, yeah, I love how you

602
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:28,480
Speaker 1: describe that, Skylar, because as you were talking, I could

603
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 1: definitely hear like, oh, this is a shift in them,

604
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:33,880
Speaker 1: like having this relationship as sisters and as like young

605
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:37,399
Speaker 1: people to these are like grown women now figuring out

606
00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:39,920
Speaker 1: how to relate to one another beyond just sisters, right

607
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:42,560
Speaker 1: Like this is like a friend, This is somebody who

608
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:44,159
Speaker 1: you know is very close to me, And so it

609
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:46,240
Speaker 1: definitely sounds like this was a turning point in figuring

610
00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:48,520
Speaker 1: out like, Okay, how are we relating to one another

611
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:51,200
Speaker 1: as grown ups now? And like what does this look

612
00:27:51,240 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 1: like to be very intentional about how we talk with

613
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 1: one another? Are there other things that you feel like

614
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:57,880
Speaker 1: have come up as is you have kind of grown

615
00:27:57,920 --> 00:27:59,960
Speaker 1: into adulthood that you realize, oh, we have to do

616
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:03,600
Speaker 1: these things differently now as adults and think about things differently.

617
00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:07,720
Speaker 2: I would say easily and only quick to answer because

618
00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:10,280
Speaker 2: I was talking toy and brother about this recently. But

619
00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:14,800
Speaker 2: when we talk about like breaking generational curses, we say

620
00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:17,400
Speaker 2: it and it sounds good, but it's really obviously hard

621
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:21,560
Speaker 2: work and you cannot break one until you endure it,

622
00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:24,320
Speaker 2: until you feel it and address it. And face it.

623
00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:26,320
Speaker 2: And when it comes to us, I think there were

624
00:28:26,359 --> 00:28:28,840
Speaker 2: so many things that were instilled in us because again

625
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:31,920
Speaker 2: our parents first time at life, and mistakes were made

626
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:35,080
Speaker 2: as it goes, or the way that it impacted us

627
00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:37,320
Speaker 2: hurt us in some ways and helped us. And I

628
00:28:37,359 --> 00:28:40,400
Speaker 2: think we've had to learn how to undo a lot

629
00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:43,040
Speaker 2: of the things we were given in a really delicate way.

630
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:45,240
Speaker 2: And one of those things is just saying quiet part

631
00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 2: out loud. Like I think that we came up in

632
00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 2: a household where joy was at the forefront and dreaming

633
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:53,080
Speaker 2: and fun, but then also hard conversations were not as

634
00:28:53,120 --> 00:28:57,120
Speaker 2: easily had. And that's fun when it's fun, but then

635
00:28:57,160 --> 00:28:59,680
Speaker 2: when you need to express yourself on a deeper level

636
00:28:59,680 --> 00:29:01,600
Speaker 2: and you want your feelings addressed and you want to

637
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:04,480
Speaker 2: be raw, it is sticky and it feels a little

638
00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:06,400
Speaker 2: bit uncomfortable. And we've had to learn how to do

639
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:08,560
Speaker 2: that with each other. I was telling our brother, like,

640
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:11,160
Speaker 2: we can't just say we you know, we're each other's

641
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:12,680
Speaker 2: favorites and we love each other and we do anything

642
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:14,920
Speaker 2: for each other and then not say the hard things

643
00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:16,880
Speaker 2: to each other or say the quiet parts out loud,

644
00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:19,960
Speaker 2: even if it you know, hurts each other's feelings, and

645
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:22,520
Speaker 2: then how can we do that intentionally and mindfully where

646
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:25,360
Speaker 2: we're still holding space for each other and being really protective,

647
00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:29,800
Speaker 2: but then making sure that we're not curating this relationship

648
00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:32,520
Speaker 2: and kind of leaning into where we knew as children.

649
00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:34,920
Speaker 2: And so I think that's something that we've all had

650
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,960
Speaker 2: to contend with. Is similar to what I think about

651
00:29:37,760 --> 00:29:39,760
Speaker 2: when it comes to our relationships with our parents. I

652
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:41,960
Speaker 2: think that you get to know your parent as a

653
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:44,240
Speaker 2: parent and almost like a hero, and there's like they're

654
00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:46,880
Speaker 2: perfect and there's nothing wrong, and like you just think

655
00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:48,760
Speaker 2: the world of them growing up in a lot of ways,

656
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:50,880
Speaker 2: until you're older and you're a little bit more your

657
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:52,600
Speaker 2: brain self, you are a little bit more developed, and

658
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:55,280
Speaker 2: then you're like, okay, all right, and you have to

659
00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:57,479
Speaker 2: get to know your parent as an adult and they

660
00:29:57,520 --> 00:29:59,520
Speaker 2: have to get to know you as an adult. And

661
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:01,880
Speaker 2: I think a lot of things are taken for granted

662
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:04,000
Speaker 2: in that relationship. And I think that our mother has

663
00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 2: done such a beautiful job in getting to know us

664
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,680
Speaker 2: as adults that we've now done that for each other

665
00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 2: where we were like, Okay, well I knew who you

666
00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:12,640
Speaker 2: were as a child, but I realized with someone and

667
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:16,640
Speaker 2: Gregory AND's that I cannot keep them in that Like

668
00:30:16,680 --> 00:30:19,560
Speaker 2: someone said, they can't be kept in a box, and

669
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:22,800
Speaker 2: I cannot keep them in that box. They've experienced life

670
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:25,960
Speaker 2: without me, and so I have to also honor that

671
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:29,000
Speaker 2: and be curious as to what that is so that

672
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,280
Speaker 2: I can create space for the entirety of who they

673
00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:34,120
Speaker 2: are and not just seeing someone as my sister. This

674
00:30:34,160 --> 00:30:36,200
Speaker 2: is what it is. She is so much more than

675
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,480
Speaker 2: my sister, and so on and so forth. So I

676
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 2: think that's something that we've has been a recurring theme

677
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:45,000
Speaker 2: in our adulthood now for sure. Funny, I don't know

678
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:48,320
Speaker 2: if you if you know anything, I think.

679
00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:51,960
Speaker 3: I think it's definitely like a lot of just communication. Obviously,

680
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:53,720
Speaker 3: like we don't live together anymore. It was a lot

681
00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:55,800
Speaker 3: easier to keep up with each other and like he

682
00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:57,640
Speaker 3: tabs on each other when we were in the same house,

683
00:30:58,000 --> 00:30:59,760
Speaker 3: and now we have to make more of a conscious

684
00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:03,240
Speaker 3: eff to like reach out and like have hard conversations.

685
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:05,160
Speaker 3: Like I feel like the first one we have kind

686
00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:07,719
Speaker 3: of as a unit with our younger brother Gregory, was

687
00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:09,200
Speaker 3: at scholar's apartment in New.

688
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 2: York, like maybe two years ago, two three.

689
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:14,760
Speaker 3: And I know, like personally me and I feel like

690
00:31:15,360 --> 00:31:18,040
Speaker 3: for Gregory as well, we're not the ones to initiate

691
00:31:18,080 --> 00:31:21,520
Speaker 3: the hard conversations, but like, once it starts like we're open,

692
00:31:21,560 --> 00:31:24,160
Speaker 3: looks like we'll get into it, but Skylar will initiate.

693
00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:27,760
Speaker 3: But I think her way of like not trying to

694
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:31,120
Speaker 3: take power of the situation was making it a game.

695
00:31:31,440 --> 00:31:34,640
Speaker 3: She had the card game We're not really strangers, and

696
00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:37,840
Speaker 3: so we played that and we're getting deep for the

697
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:40,120
Speaker 3: first time with our younger brother. We're talking about anxiety

698
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:42,400
Speaker 3: and trauma's because like her and I talk about it

699
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:43,800
Speaker 3: all the time, but that was the first time that

700
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:46,560
Speaker 3: he put in his two cents and we're like, wow,

701
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:50,040
Speaker 3: like you're not just sur nonchalant, little brother, was real cool,

702
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:53,120
Speaker 3: Like you were like understanding the things we were going

703
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:55,600
Speaker 3: through too. So I feel like, just like having those conversations,

704
00:31:55,640 --> 00:31:57,840
Speaker 3: spending a lot of time with each other, because the

705
00:31:57,880 --> 00:32:00,680
Speaker 3: conversations easily happened when we're together. I think just like

706
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 3: spending time together like makes it easier for us to

707
00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:06,000
Speaker 3: have these conversations, continue to get to know each other

708
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 3: because we're all still growing, Like even though we feel

709
00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:10,880
Speaker 3: like we're we're grown and we're adults, which we are,

710
00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:13,320
Speaker 3: like you know, we're dynamic people, were constantly changing.

711
00:32:13,720 --> 00:32:15,000
Speaker 2: Humans are complex people.

712
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:17,120
Speaker 3: So I feel like we have to make that effort

713
00:32:17,200 --> 00:32:20,560
Speaker 3: to consciously get to know each other like continuously, and

714
00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:25,440
Speaker 3: like I know, Skylar said into me by not like

715
00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:29,120
Speaker 3: encouraging me heavily to start therapy for a long time.

716
00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:31,480
Speaker 3: I was like, you know, I know what my childhood

717
00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:35,080
Speaker 3: traumas are. I know what's wrong, but like obviously you

718
00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:38,520
Speaker 3: don't know like without bias, like having somebody sit you

719
00:32:38,560 --> 00:32:41,160
Speaker 3: down and like walk you through things and help you

720
00:32:41,240 --> 00:32:43,720
Speaker 3: to like figure out different ways to react to things

721
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:47,360
Speaker 3: because I know personally, if something runs me the wrong way,

722
00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:50,160
Speaker 3: I'm seeing red and like I have tunnel vision on

723
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:52,360
Speaker 3: the issue, and I was trying to work on that.

724
00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:55,480
Speaker 3: So like Skylar sponsored my therapy for I want to say,

725
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:58,680
Speaker 3: what like three years. She was paying for all my appointments, and.

726
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:00,800
Speaker 2: I was like, should I just like once a month

727
00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:03,640
Speaker 2: because that's expensive. She's like, no, you go weekly, and

728
00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:06,360
Speaker 2: when you feel like you don't need anymore, then maybe

729
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:07,160
Speaker 2: do bi weekly.

730
00:33:07,200 --> 00:33:09,440
Speaker 3: But she she was paying for it and like checking

731
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:11,040
Speaker 3: in like, so, hey.

732
00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:12,920
Speaker 2: How's therapy you still doing?

733
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:13,280
Speaker 3: Right?

734
00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:15,960
Speaker 2: Like I didn't get the invlace last week.

735
00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:19,600
Speaker 3: What's going I think, just you know, like we all

736
00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:21,680
Speaker 3: show that we really care about each other, even though

737
00:33:21,720 --> 00:33:24,000
Speaker 3: initially it might have just been like can I like yeah,

738
00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:25,959
Speaker 3: I love my sister. It's like, okay, yeah you can

739
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:26,520
Speaker 3: love you sister.

740
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:28,720
Speaker 2: What are you doing to prove it? Loky, Like you

741
00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:30,560
Speaker 2: could say it all day? But how are you showing

742
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:31,200
Speaker 2: up for each other?

743
00:33:31,400 --> 00:33:34,320
Speaker 3: And I think we're all making better efforts at actually

744
00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:36,320
Speaker 3: showing up for each other in ways like that.

745
00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:38,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, in the ways we communicate and don't because I

746
00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:42,000
Speaker 2: think sometimes I'll make assumptions and i'd really try to

747
00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:44,360
Speaker 2: pair it back and just be like okay. Even with

748
00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:46,240
Speaker 2: a therapy thing, I was like, is this too overbearing?

749
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:48,400
Speaker 2: I know therapy is not the answer to all things.

750
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:49,960
Speaker 2: You can be in therapy and don't not do the

751
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:52,920
Speaker 2: work like it's so layered. But I think because it

752
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:55,520
Speaker 2: had shifted my life in such a beautiful way, I

753
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:58,200
Speaker 2: wanted to offer that space for her, and then once

754
00:33:58,280 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 2: the space was offered, it was up to her to

755
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:01,960
Speaker 2: move and shake however she wanted to within it. And

756
00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:03,400
Speaker 2: then I was like, okay, girl, don't be over like,

757
00:34:03,400 --> 00:34:05,040
Speaker 2: don't ask every week just like, let her come to

758
00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:07,000
Speaker 2: you and if she wants to share, that's fine, and.

759
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:11,120
Speaker 3: She doesn't, Okay, just like levels that with myself.

760
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:13,200
Speaker 2: But I do think that now we're like, okay, well,

761
00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:15,160
Speaker 2: what can I give my siblings that they ask for

762
00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:17,200
Speaker 2: and then also for in the things that I notice

763
00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:19,680
Speaker 2: in their adulthood that they may need a shoulder to

764
00:34:19,719 --> 00:34:22,799
Speaker 2: cry on or a space to be free in and

765
00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:24,879
Speaker 2: like breathe a little bit easier, and can I create

766
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 2: those faith? And they've done the same for me on

767
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:30,680
Speaker 2: countless occasion. So it's been a beautiful kind of learning

768
00:34:30,719 --> 00:34:32,160
Speaker 2: experience together, I think.

769
00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:36,400
Speaker 1: And you all have taken your relationship an even step

770
00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:40,120
Speaker 1: further by working together. Right, So you mentioned earlier that

771
00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:43,040
Speaker 1: you have at least one project called set together. How

772
00:34:43,080 --> 00:34:47,120
Speaker 1: has your relationship as sisters changed in now having this

773
00:34:47,200 --> 00:34:48,880
Speaker 1: professional relationship together?

774
00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:52,920
Speaker 3: Maybe you have a better way to put it in

775
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:54,840
Speaker 3: the words me personally, I don't know. I feel like

776
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:59,319
Speaker 3: because we've always played together, it's not much of a ship.

777
00:34:59,480 --> 00:34:59,719
Speaker 2: I know.

778
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:02,760
Speaker 3: Well, I'll say Skylar takes a lot more of the

779
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:05,960
Speaker 3: initiative when it comes to set, Like she's booking the studio,

780
00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:08,520
Speaker 3: she's making the set design. I just go in there

781
00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:11,279
Speaker 3: and I play in my little music like that.

782
00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 2: So I'm just I'm just.

783
00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:15,400
Speaker 3: Having fun and like it's just a fun way to

784
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:19,640
Speaker 3: like express ourselves and like show people our talents, like

785
00:35:19,719 --> 00:35:22,400
Speaker 3: you know, her set design, my music taste.

786
00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:23,640
Speaker 2: I guess yeah, I.

787
00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:26,120
Speaker 3: Think, and hearing from a lot of people, specifically other

788
00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:28,600
Speaker 3: sisters that are like reaching out to us like, oh

789
00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:29,920
Speaker 3: my gosh, just really spoke to me.

790
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:31,280
Speaker 2: I love sisterhood.

791
00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:36,080
Speaker 3: Sisterhood is everything, and then we're like, you know what, yeah,

792
00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:40,360
Speaker 3: yeah that really is like a big part of our lives.

793
00:35:40,400 --> 00:35:42,560
Speaker 3: But you know, maybe scholar has more.

794
00:35:42,719 --> 00:35:46,960
Speaker 2: I mean, well, we yeah, we work together probably a

795
00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:48,560
Speaker 2: bunch of different ways. I think the first time we

796
00:35:48,600 --> 00:35:50,280
Speaker 2: worked together for real was when we shared a bedroom

797
00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:53,760
Speaker 2: and we had to learn how to delegate and communicate

798
00:35:53,880 --> 00:35:56,920
Speaker 2: and deal with each other's things. But I think now

799
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,359
Speaker 2: the beautiful thing about it so far as that set

800
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:01,879
Speaker 2: is really new and so yes, we've just been able

801
00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:05,640
Speaker 2: to play. Both of us have full time jobs and

802
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:10,160
Speaker 2: passions that we are pouring into weekly, and so this

803
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:13,520
Speaker 2: has become an outlet for us to do something on

804
00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:18,080
Speaker 2: our own terms that's super flexible and there's no expectations.

805
00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:21,400
Speaker 2: I think we'll probably who knows, come up on stuff,

806
00:36:21,520 --> 00:36:24,880
Speaker 2: more stuff when maybe things get more serious, like we

807
00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:27,040
Speaker 2: start to bring partners in, or maybe when our audience

808
00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:29,000
Speaker 2: gets a little bit bigger. But right now it's really

809
00:36:29,560 --> 00:36:31,920
Speaker 2: been a testament of our love for each other, or

810
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:34,400
Speaker 2: like a space where we can kind of work together

811
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:35,759
Speaker 2: in this way where it's like a lot of give

812
00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:38,279
Speaker 2: and take. And I think that, yeah, we play to

813
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:41,759
Speaker 2: our strengths when it comes to set. So and I

814
00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:43,520
Speaker 2: was just explaining this the other day, but it's like

815
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:47,799
Speaker 2: someone and I stick to our corners. Like when we

816
00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:49,880
Speaker 2: first dreamt it up, there was a lot of collaboration,

817
00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:52,600
Speaker 2: but then it's like, okay, well, you have great music tastes,

818
00:36:52,640 --> 00:36:55,399
Speaker 2: and you know what storytelling looks like when it comes

819
00:36:55,440 --> 00:36:57,680
Speaker 2: to a set, and you know how to get people

820
00:36:57,680 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 2: from A to B when it comes to the sonic

821
00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 2: structure of things. And then for me, it was creative design.

822
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:04,960
Speaker 2: So how are we seeing this manifest and how are

823
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,680
Speaker 2: we telling this story beyond the music? And I think

824
00:37:07,719 --> 00:37:09,560
Speaker 2: by being in our corners in that way, we've not

825
00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:13,280
Speaker 2: crossed over into territory too much to where we've bumped heads.

826
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:15,799
Speaker 2: I think that there is a lot of respect for

827
00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:19,399
Speaker 2: either side to where when I hear something this sum's done,

828
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:22,279
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, this could be smoother, what could you do?

829
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:24,680
Speaker 2: She'll either take it or she's like, yeah, no, I

830
00:37:24,680 --> 00:37:26,440
Speaker 2: don't know. This is what it is, Like we're going

831
00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:27,759
Speaker 2: to roll with it. And then I'm like all right,

832
00:37:28,120 --> 00:37:29,480
Speaker 2: and I kind of let her do her thing. I

833
00:37:29,480 --> 00:37:32,799
Speaker 2: think the beautiful thing is like it's not perfect. And

834
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:36,560
Speaker 2: I'm also trying to release the desire for perfection with

835
00:37:36,640 --> 00:37:38,840
Speaker 2: the things that I create, because a lot of what

836
00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:40,759
Speaker 2: I do now is on this platform that's seen by

837
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:42,920
Speaker 2: a lot of people. And as a creator, you know

838
00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:46,040
Speaker 2: that when you begin, it's fun to make mistakes, but

839
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 2: when you're like further along, it gets a lot harder

840
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 2: and you have to let that humility come in again

841
00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:56,759
Speaker 2: and be intentional about how you're creating something new and

842
00:37:56,880 --> 00:38:00,480
Speaker 2: going into new territory. And you might fall And I

843
00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:04,080
Speaker 2: think that because there's so much love in it, falling short,

844
00:38:04,080 --> 00:38:05,759
Speaker 2: it's still like, okay, well I'm doing with my sister,

845
00:38:05,840 --> 00:38:07,920
Speaker 2: so like, what's the worst that could happen? Or if

846
00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:09,120
Speaker 2: me and my sister A love it great, like we

847
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:12,719
Speaker 2: could be the only subscribers. And I think there's really

848
00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 2: no end goal, Like even when we drummed it up,

849
00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:16,120
Speaker 2: we were just like I was just like, hey, I

850
00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:18,000
Speaker 2: want to do creative direction more and I love your

851
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:20,000
Speaker 2: work and how can like, I want to use my

852
00:38:20,239 --> 00:38:23,480
Speaker 2: platform to amplify your work? Are you interested? And she

853
00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:25,839
Speaker 2: was like absolutely, can we do it like this? And

854
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:27,600
Speaker 2: that was it. There wasn't like where do you see

855
00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:30,759
Speaker 2: it in five years? Which I think is great because

856
00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:32,719
Speaker 2: so much of the other stuff we do we have

857
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:35,360
Speaker 2: to think, we have to be very forward thinking, and

858
00:38:35,440 --> 00:38:37,520
Speaker 2: this is fun to just do for us and our

859
00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:40,279
Speaker 2: relationship and for our personal archive and then if it

860
00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:42,520
Speaker 2: becomes something it does and if it doesn't, it was

861
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:43,719
Speaker 2: so beautiful. I think.

862
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:47,719
Speaker 1: So this may be a part of your cancer kind

863
00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:51,160
Speaker 1: of habitual aligned stuff for a personality, son Lynn, but

864
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:53,759
Speaker 1: I would imagine that you know, it could be difficult

865
00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:57,200
Speaker 1: to like do work with your big sister and say like, no,

866
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,760
Speaker 1: actually I want it to be this way, right, especially

867
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:02,040
Speaker 1: some who we it sounds like so organized and like

868
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:05,120
Speaker 1: has very clear ideas. What has allowed you to kind

869
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:08,319
Speaker 1: of stay focused on your vision for you know, what

870
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:11,000
Speaker 1: your part of set should look like in opposition to

871
00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:13,200
Speaker 1: maybe what Skylar ease.

872
00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:18,759
Speaker 3: Hmm, maybe it's just the headstrong in me starting to

873
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:22,319
Speaker 3: come out. But like, I also do respect Skylar a lot,

874
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:26,120
Speaker 3: So when she does, like have constructive criticism, I'm never

875
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:29,440
Speaker 3: taking it personally. It's like I might think something sounds good,

876
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:32,719
Speaker 3: and obviously music everything is subjective essentially in art, so

877
00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:35,000
Speaker 3: I'm like, Okay, maybe it sounded good to me, and

878
00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:37,759
Speaker 3: I need a second opinion. So I know, I feel

879
00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:39,359
Speaker 3: like I take everything kind of with a grain of salt.

880
00:39:39,440 --> 00:39:42,560
Speaker 3: Like I'm like, Yomi, see if I can adjust whatever

881
00:39:42,680 --> 00:39:45,839
Speaker 3: the issue is. But like, for the most part, if

882
00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:48,520
Speaker 3: she thinks to something other sound right, I'm like, Okay.

883
00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:50,920
Speaker 2: She'll look at it, and she'll say, all right, I'll

884
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:51,360
Speaker 2: look at it.

885
00:39:52,600 --> 00:39:56,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I do respect her, and I know that she's

886
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,000
Speaker 3: had like a lot more time and experience in the

887
00:39:59,040 --> 00:40:02,520
Speaker 3: creative field. So I do like take everything that she

888
00:40:02,719 --> 00:40:06,120
Speaker 3: says with her criticisms. I take it and I analyze it.

889
00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:07,920
Speaker 3: I'm like, if I can't fix it, I will. If not,

890
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:09,560
Speaker 3: then yeah, we're just gonna have to roll with it.

891
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 3: Because but it's like we literally recording it on the spot.

892
00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:16,120
Speaker 3: It's not like I'm recording it after we do the

893
00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:17,399
Speaker 3: whole set. So it's like some.

894
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:18,960
Speaker 2: Stuff just just can't be fixed.

895
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:22,040
Speaker 3: So I'm like, but you know, I'm not one of

896
00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:24,319
Speaker 3: those people who has to be perfect, Like you know,

897
00:40:24,480 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 3: I good enough is good enough for me a lot

898
00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:29,359
Speaker 3: of the times, Like I feel like I'm like one

899
00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:32,759
Speaker 3: step under perfectionist. Like I'll get as close as I

900
00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:34,960
Speaker 3: feel like as possible, and I'm fine with that.

901
00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:37,560
Speaker 2: But yeah, I mean I think it's been really fun.

902
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:40,520
Speaker 3: I was a little nervous initially because I take like

903
00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:43,560
Speaker 3: Skyler and her work personally and a lot of people

904
00:40:43,600 --> 00:40:47,040
Speaker 3: will try to like get close to me, to get

905
00:40:47,080 --> 00:40:49,880
Speaker 3: close to her, So I was a little scared initially,

906
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,600
Speaker 3: like working with her, is that gonna make this worse?

907
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:55,200
Speaker 3: Like people like, oh, they have this set together, let

908
00:40:55,239 --> 00:40:58,120
Speaker 3: me ask something if I could put this part or

909
00:40:58,120 --> 00:41:01,120
Speaker 3: contribute this because I know it'll be on Skylar's platform,

910
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:04,120
Speaker 3: Like like I don't know, but you know, I feel

911
00:41:04,120 --> 00:41:06,480
Speaker 3: like it is a fifty to fifty thing. Like literally

912
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:09,440
Speaker 3: I'm the music, she's the visuals. So I feel like

913
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:13,480
Speaker 3: it's definitely just like it's mutually beneficial for the both

914
00:41:13,520 --> 00:41:14,800
Speaker 3: of us, and it's been.

915
00:41:14,680 --> 00:41:17,439
Speaker 2: Fun so far. Yeah, I mean we've had a time

916
00:41:17,480 --> 00:41:19,400
Speaker 2: and I think someone said it perfectly, like she's not

917
00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:23,880
Speaker 2: scared of imperfection. And because I have her a different

918
00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:27,680
Speaker 2: relationship with trying to have things sorted and to make

919
00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:30,719
Speaker 2: sure things look beautiful. I think that that's one of

920
00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:33,080
Speaker 2: my strengths. But then it's been something that hurt me

921
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:35,359
Speaker 2: in the past because then I take things personally when

922
00:41:35,400 --> 00:41:38,880
Speaker 2: they aren't all together and there's so much beauty and imperfection.

923
00:41:39,080 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 2: So someone then teaches me, Okay, well we can just

924
00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:43,560
Speaker 2: do this. We can do it scared, and we can

925
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:45,399
Speaker 2: do it imperfect and we can do it without knowing

926
00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:47,280
Speaker 2: all the things and it will still be great, because

927
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:50,000
Speaker 2: it's a difference between doing something and not And I

928
00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:52,279
Speaker 2: think that when you're, you know, pursuing something in the

929
00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:56,640
Speaker 2: creative industry like or any creative field like a lot

930
00:41:56,680 --> 00:41:58,920
Speaker 2: of people are aspiring to do the things, but then

931
00:41:58,960 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 2: we'll get in their own way, but because it's not perfect.

932
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:03,120
Speaker 2: And so this was one of those things that we

933
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:05,360
Speaker 2: thought of it and then maybe two weeks later we

934
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:07,759
Speaker 2: did it. And that is very rare for me. I

935
00:42:07,800 --> 00:42:09,319
Speaker 2: tend to sit on things because I want to make

936
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:12,799
Speaker 2: sure they're just so. But it's been teaching me so much,

937
00:42:12,840 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 2: and I think someone's ability to see something. I'm like,

938
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:17,200
Speaker 2: oh my god. I think even with the first one,

939
00:42:17,239 --> 00:42:19,000
Speaker 2: I was like, someone, this isn't and we could have

940
00:42:19,000 --> 00:42:20,520
Speaker 2: done this, and she was like, girl, let's just get

941
00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:22,720
Speaker 2: it out there, like who cares? And no one noticed

942
00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:24,440
Speaker 2: it and no one does. But if you're in your

943
00:42:24,480 --> 00:42:24,959
Speaker 2: own head.

944
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:28,960
Speaker 3: So but even still, like with the imperfections, I think

945
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:31,839
Speaker 3: that's great because moving forward, I know I noticed it

946
00:42:31,880 --> 00:42:34,480
Speaker 3: from recording the last episode. You can see the growth

947
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:38,280
Speaker 3: on both parts that like you can see elements changing

948
00:42:38,440 --> 00:42:41,160
Speaker 3: throughout each recording. Like from the first video, I was

949
00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:43,279
Speaker 3: so scared. I had my little baby board. I just

950
00:42:43,280 --> 00:42:46,320
Speaker 3: started DJing last year, like literally a year ago in October,

951
00:42:46,360 --> 00:42:46,959
Speaker 3: and I'm like.

952
00:42:46,920 --> 00:42:48,040
Speaker 2: Who I want to be?

953
00:42:48,080 --> 00:42:50,560
Speaker 3: Put it on YouTube, Instagram, TikTok.

954
00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:51,480
Speaker 2: It's so permanent.

955
00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:54,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, as are moving along, I'm obviously getting more comfortable.

956
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:58,239
Speaker 3: I've upgraded my board, Like things are getting smoother. We

957
00:42:58,320 --> 00:43:00,839
Speaker 3: have like a better run of show, like we know

958
00:43:00,880 --> 00:43:03,400
Speaker 3: how things are gonna play out. So I think like

959
00:43:03,719 --> 00:43:06,920
Speaker 3: even with the imperfections, it's like so what, like, yeah.

960
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:11,080
Speaker 2: It inspires people I think are somewhere yeah, exactly up

961
00:43:11,360 --> 00:43:12,960
Speaker 2: and not trying to cover it up. Like I just

962
00:43:12,960 --> 00:43:15,040
Speaker 2: started like, yeah, I'm gonna mess up. That's just and

963
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:17,440
Speaker 2: that's for any creator if you look at their archive

964
00:43:17,520 --> 00:43:20,680
Speaker 2: and you go back to the beginning. I mean still

965
00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:22,640
Speaker 2: you know, like I think, but that's such a beautiful

966
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:26,440
Speaker 2: testament to humanity seeing the growth in the process over time.

967
00:43:26,480 --> 00:43:29,560
Speaker 2: You cannot begin at perfection and you may not ever

968
00:43:29,600 --> 00:43:31,160
Speaker 2: reach it, so like you have to kind of throw

969
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,640
Speaker 2: it out altogether. But I completely agree. It's been a

970
00:43:33,640 --> 00:43:36,680
Speaker 2: great chronicle of our growth, even over the last three

971
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:38,600
Speaker 2: sets that we've done, I mean, the two that we

972
00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:41,440
Speaker 2: have been in the third that's coming soon. Nice.

973
00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:55,000
Speaker 1: Nice, more from our conversation after the break, you know, suddenly,

974
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:57,360
Speaker 1: as you were talking, it reminded me of these TikTok

975
00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:00,239
Speaker 1: videos where it's like a partner pair or or like

976
00:44:00,239 --> 00:44:02,960
Speaker 1: a sibling pair, and like one sibling is the one

977
00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:05,200
Speaker 1: who is afraid to say, like, hey, I actually don't

978
00:44:05,239 --> 00:44:07,440
Speaker 1: like this dish, and like the younger sister comes out

979
00:44:07,440 --> 00:44:09,239
Speaker 1: of though and like talk to me, I talk that

980
00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:11,239
Speaker 1: kind of thing. And it made me think of that

981
00:44:11,760 --> 00:44:14,560
Speaker 1: because Scola, you mentioned like I don't really like conflict,

982
00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:16,680
Speaker 1: and so it feels like something you are the one

983
00:44:16,719 --> 00:44:19,720
Speaker 1: who is sometimes maybe sticking up for your big sister.

984
00:44:19,800 --> 00:44:22,600
Speaker 1: It feels like if you know, bullying maybe happens online

985
00:44:22,840 --> 00:44:24,360
Speaker 1: or can you say a little a.

986
00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:27,920
Speaker 2: Little bit more about that dynamic. Oh that is so funny.

987
00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:32,000
Speaker 3: I think it's actually insane because growing up I was

988
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:34,279
Speaker 3: always an introvert and she was an extrovert. But I

989
00:44:34,280 --> 00:44:36,960
Speaker 3: think it's just like a protection thing over your siblings,

990
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:41,239
Speaker 3: Like if somebody is mean to her, she might not

991
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:45,359
Speaker 3: say something about it. I love will I love he's

992
00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:48,120
Speaker 3: even still being an introvert. It's just like I think

993
00:44:48,120 --> 00:44:50,799
Speaker 3: it's again like something that our mom instilled in us,

994
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:53,040
Speaker 3: like wanting to give back and be there for other people.

995
00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:55,279
Speaker 3: If I know that somebody is hurt by something and

996
00:44:55,320 --> 00:44:57,920
Speaker 3: they won't speak up for themselves, who am I to

997
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:00,680
Speaker 3: not be an advocate and like sick up for them?

998
00:45:00,760 --> 00:45:03,759
Speaker 3: So I think that that's that's such of the dynamic. Like, yeah,

999
00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:05,720
Speaker 3: I don't know if it's because I'm also a middle child,

1000
00:45:05,800 --> 00:45:09,280
Speaker 3: and like the middle child is typically like the more

1001
00:45:10,400 --> 00:45:14,520
Speaker 3: like confrontational, I guess, but like Skyler's better with words.

1002
00:45:14,520 --> 00:45:16,560
Speaker 2: She might not like the confrontation.

1003
00:45:16,120 --> 00:45:19,640
Speaker 3: But if I can read you down, but she'll get

1004
00:45:19,640 --> 00:45:21,560
Speaker 3: into it, she'll fill in the blanks where I can't.

1005
00:45:22,880 --> 00:45:26,200
Speaker 2: That's definitely the dynamic for sure. Like I'll speak up

1006
00:45:26,239 --> 00:45:28,439
Speaker 2: before she does, and she's like, I don't know, maybe

1007
00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:31,640
Speaker 2: I'm doing too much. Now you're not doing that well,

1008
00:45:33,160 --> 00:45:35,440
Speaker 2: it's turning up. That's so funny, doctor Jordan, that she

1009
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:37,399
Speaker 2: said that because you just read someone in our port

1010
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:38,759
Speaker 2: like that's literally our whole thing.

1011
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:42,360
Speaker 1: She's so, Oh my goodness, that's so funny. I love that.

1012
00:45:42,480 --> 00:45:44,040
Speaker 2: I love that so sudden.

1013
00:45:44,400 --> 00:45:47,000
Speaker 1: What about your relationship with Skyler do you feel like

1014
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:49,160
Speaker 1: you hold on to most when you are wanting to

1015
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:50,840
Speaker 1: feel comforted or grounded.

1016
00:45:51,320 --> 00:45:54,360
Speaker 3: I think the fact that she's like never judged me

1017
00:45:54,480 --> 00:45:57,600
Speaker 3: for anything that I've done, and I've done some crazy

1018
00:45:57,640 --> 00:46:01,200
Speaker 3: things and she's never some some crazy things, just found

1019
00:46:01,200 --> 00:46:03,800
Speaker 3: the way to support me, even if it's not telling

1020
00:46:03,840 --> 00:46:07,400
Speaker 3: me that I was right obviously, like she'll still find

1021
00:46:07,400 --> 00:46:09,760
Speaker 3: a way to make me feel better about the situation

1022
00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:13,600
Speaker 3: and know how to move better if it were to

1023
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:16,080
Speaker 3: happen again. So I think just like the space that

1024
00:46:16,160 --> 00:46:18,880
Speaker 3: she's created for me to always show up as myself

1025
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:21,879
Speaker 3: and not feeling me to hold back is like one

1026
00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:23,840
Speaker 3: of the most important parts of our relationship. Like I

1027
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:27,759
Speaker 3: could literally talk to her about anything, and like it's

1028
00:46:27,840 --> 00:46:28,240
Speaker 3: not really.

1029
00:46:28,120 --> 00:46:29,280
Speaker 2: An uncomfortable conversation.

1030
00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:31,400
Speaker 3: It's just like this is just how we talk, like

1031
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 3: we can about anything.

1032
00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:34,120
Speaker 2: At any time, any place.

1033
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:36,920
Speaker 1: What about you, Skyler, what about your relationship with something?

1034
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:37,839
Speaker 1: Did you hold on to you?

1035
00:46:38,120 --> 00:46:40,720
Speaker 2: I'm so smiling. I just love talking about sister stuff.

1036
00:46:40,719 --> 00:46:45,919
Speaker 2: I would say, oh, there's so so much. I think, oh, yeah,

1037
00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:47,799
Speaker 2: there's a very long list. But I would say one

1038
00:46:47,800 --> 00:46:49,680
Speaker 2: of the two things that come to mind is just

1039
00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:53,000
Speaker 2: someone's it's kind of one, but just her ability to

1040
00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:58,799
Speaker 2: be so fearless, actually just two things. Fearless in that

1041
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:03,440
Speaker 2: she walks world with so much of herself at the forefront,

1042
00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:07,040
Speaker 2: and it's so unapologetic and so proud that I take

1043
00:47:07,080 --> 00:47:09,600
Speaker 2: so much of that, and it just seeps into me

1044
00:47:09,719 --> 00:47:14,000
Speaker 2: all the time, Like her confidence is insane. And sometimes

1045
00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:15,960
Speaker 2: I'm just like and it's so crazy. Because I'm on

1046
00:47:15,960 --> 00:47:17,640
Speaker 2: social media petre a little bit more and so then

1047
00:47:17,680 --> 00:47:21,279
Speaker 2: I'm perceived a lot more. But often when you're perceived more,

1048
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:23,960
Speaker 2: you are given a lot of opinions and it's like, well,

1049
00:47:23,960 --> 00:47:25,560
Speaker 2: you have to make sure you pursue them and decide

1050
00:47:25,560 --> 00:47:28,560
Speaker 2: about how you feel about yourself. And I had started

1051
00:47:28,560 --> 00:47:32,680
Speaker 2: on social media and started building a platform before I

1052
00:47:32,719 --> 00:47:35,160
Speaker 2: started doing that work, so I had to kind of

1053
00:47:35,200 --> 00:47:36,799
Speaker 2: take a like look at it and make sure that

1054
00:47:36,800 --> 00:47:39,239
Speaker 2: I was slowing things down and deciding for myself how

1055
00:47:39,239 --> 00:47:41,359
Speaker 2: I felt. But She's never had to let anyone else

1056
00:47:41,360 --> 00:47:43,400
Speaker 2: but her decide how she feels. And that's what I

1057
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:46,080
Speaker 2: love so so much about her. She is just so

1058
00:47:46,120 --> 00:47:49,080
Speaker 2: sure of herself in all the ways that I think

1059
00:47:49,120 --> 00:47:52,239
Speaker 2: count because we all have our own insecurities, but she

1060
00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:55,920
Speaker 2: sees herself so clearly to me, and I think it's

1061
00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:59,600
Speaker 2: allowed me to see myself clearly as well, because we're

1062
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:02,120
Speaker 2: so similar in a lot of ways. And then oftentimes

1063
00:48:02,160 --> 00:48:03,719
Speaker 2: she'll call things out in me that I don't even

1064
00:48:03,760 --> 00:48:05,319
Speaker 2: see them make me feel like, wow, you see that

1065
00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:07,160
Speaker 2: in me? That makes me feel so good, so I

1066
00:48:07,160 --> 00:48:10,040
Speaker 2: would say that. But then also her ability to be

1067
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:14,240
Speaker 2: so soft. I know she talks about being a cancer,

1068
00:48:14,280 --> 00:48:16,600
Speaker 2: and yeah, I guess it does track her sensitivity. She

1069
00:48:16,680 --> 00:48:18,880
Speaker 2: is so sensitive in a way. I think I'm maybe

1070
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:21,520
Speaker 2: more extroverted in my sensitivity, Like everyone knows I'm sensitive

1071
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:24,919
Speaker 2: all the time about anything, but someone is very intentional

1072
00:48:24,960 --> 00:48:28,080
Speaker 2: in her sensitivity and very quiet about it. It is

1073
00:48:28,160 --> 00:48:32,279
Speaker 2: so elegant in the way it shows. It's beautiful in

1074
00:48:32,280 --> 00:48:35,280
Speaker 2: the way that she shows up with her softer parts,

1075
00:48:35,280 --> 00:48:38,120
Speaker 2: like she holds them in a really protective way and

1076
00:48:38,320 --> 00:48:41,759
Speaker 2: communicates them in a beautiful way. And I think it's

1077
00:48:41,800 --> 00:48:43,960
Speaker 2: allowed me to be a little bit more protective of

1078
00:48:44,000 --> 00:48:47,400
Speaker 2: my parts in that same way, and to hold space

1079
00:48:47,440 --> 00:48:49,160
Speaker 2: for myself in a way that's like, Okay, yes, it's

1080
00:48:49,160 --> 00:48:51,800
Speaker 2: not everyone can get access to this, because I tend

1081
00:48:51,920 --> 00:48:53,920
Speaker 2: to be a little bit open with everybody, and I've

1082
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:57,400
Speaker 2: been hurt because of it, as one is and one does.

1083
00:48:57,440 --> 00:48:59,960
Speaker 2: But with someone I think that, and I'm sure she's

1084
00:49:00,080 --> 00:49:02,520
Speaker 2: had her own like hurdles to jump over by being

1085
00:49:02,560 --> 00:49:04,959
Speaker 2: a little bit more protective, but I think it's been

1086
00:49:05,400 --> 00:49:07,040
Speaker 2: done in such a way that then the people who

1087
00:49:07,080 --> 00:49:09,719
Speaker 2: are close to her hold parts of her in a

1088
00:49:09,760 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 2: really beautiful way and know the value of the parts

1089
00:49:12,120 --> 00:49:14,040
Speaker 2: of her that they're holding because she was like, hey,

1090
00:49:14,120 --> 00:49:16,239
Speaker 2: not everyone has access to this, so I think and

1091
00:49:16,280 --> 00:49:18,560
Speaker 2: even me like, I've had to learn how to love

1092
00:49:18,560 --> 00:49:22,200
Speaker 2: her properly to have access to those parts because she's

1093
00:49:22,320 --> 00:49:24,919
Speaker 2: so protective of them. So yes, both of those things,

1094
00:49:24,960 --> 00:49:27,600
Speaker 2: but the louder, fearless part. But then also the softer,

1095
00:49:27,719 --> 00:49:30,319
Speaker 2: quiet side that I think she just does so well

1096
00:49:30,360 --> 00:49:32,439
Speaker 2: and so beautifully that I've learned so much from.

1097
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:36,800
Speaker 1: So you both have also talked about this beautiful moment

1098
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:39,000
Speaker 1: you both have talked about. I don't know if your

1099
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:40,840
Speaker 1: parents were aware of this. I'm sure they were in

1100
00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:44,760
Speaker 1: naming you this whole Sun Sky metaphor as a metaphor

1101
00:49:44,800 --> 00:49:47,560
Speaker 1: for your relationship. Can you talk about that suddenly and

1102
00:49:47,560 --> 00:49:50,359
Speaker 1: how you feel like that has played out, especially in adulthood.

1103
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:52,640
Speaker 2: Hmm.

1104
00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:56,919
Speaker 3: You asking me all the time like they're like, why

1105
00:49:56,920 --> 00:49:58,480
Speaker 3: did your parents name you that? I'm like, oh, my

1106
00:49:58,560 --> 00:50:03,239
Speaker 3: Alma was just doing like the nature thing, like there's yeah.

1107
00:50:03,239 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 3: And even our half sister, Lannie, her middle name is

1108
00:50:06,560 --> 00:50:09,719
Speaker 3: heaven and Hawaiian, so it's like even our stepmam was

1109
00:50:09,760 --> 00:50:10,440
Speaker 3: following suit.

1110
00:50:10,480 --> 00:50:11,920
Speaker 2: Like God, think that our.

1111
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:14,920
Speaker 3: Family's just very like we're like down to earth, grounded,

1112
00:50:15,000 --> 00:50:19,640
Speaker 3: so naming us after like parts of the world sculpted

1113
00:50:19,719 --> 00:50:22,080
Speaker 3: like how we show up today, Like I feel like

1114
00:50:23,080 --> 00:50:26,080
Speaker 3: we're both pretty bubbly and outgoing people, but like what

1115
00:50:26,239 --> 00:50:26,879
Speaker 3: choice do you.

1116
00:50:26,920 --> 00:50:28,640
Speaker 2: Have with names like sun and sky?

1117
00:50:28,800 --> 00:50:36,919
Speaker 3: Imaginable right all the time, because like I bartend, people

1118
00:50:36,920 --> 00:50:38,200
Speaker 3: will be like, oh, what's your name again?

1119
00:50:38,239 --> 00:50:41,040
Speaker 2: I'm like, Sonny, Oh my god, it makes so much sense.

1120
00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:43,759
Speaker 2: Like you're so nice. I'm like, well, like what if

1121
00:50:44,280 --> 00:50:44,719
Speaker 2: I wasn't?

1122
00:50:47,400 --> 00:50:50,120
Speaker 3: But I feel like because I don't know, well, I

1123
00:50:50,160 --> 00:50:52,439
Speaker 3: guess because of our names, we have a good give

1124
00:50:52,440 --> 00:50:55,279
Speaker 3: and take, Like we're night and day. We're similar in

1125
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:56,800
Speaker 3: a lot of ways but different in a lot of

1126
00:50:56,840 --> 00:50:59,719
Speaker 3: ways too, and we both are just like we're very

1127
00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:02,759
Speaker 3: under standing of that. And like Schaller said, learning how

1128
00:51:02,800 --> 00:51:05,640
Speaker 3: to love each other the way that each other wants

1129
00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:08,279
Speaker 3: it is important because you might think that you're showing

1130
00:51:08,360 --> 00:51:10,160
Speaker 3: up for somebody and you're just showing up the way

1131
00:51:10,160 --> 00:51:11,520
Speaker 3: that you would want someone to show up for you.

1132
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:14,399
Speaker 2: But that's not the way that everybody risky its love.

1133
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:16,960
Speaker 3: So I think that's been an important part of our journey,

1134
00:51:17,040 --> 00:51:19,480
Speaker 3: is like acknowledging that and learning how to show up

1135
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:19,960
Speaker 3: for each other.

1136
00:51:20,760 --> 00:51:22,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, because I could. I tend to be a little

1137
00:51:22,600 --> 00:51:24,960
Speaker 2: bit of a helicopter older sibling, where I at the beginning,

1138
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,680
Speaker 2: that's like I was like, let me handle everything so

1139
00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:31,880
Speaker 2: that nothing is unhandled, and Somelin and Gregory and then

1140
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:34,200
Speaker 2: our younger siblings as they've gotten older, they have stepped

1141
00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:36,880
Speaker 2: into adulthood so beautifully that it's like, well, girl, you

1142
00:51:36,960 --> 00:51:39,319
Speaker 2: can't do all the things in advance because they'll never

1143
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:41,319
Speaker 2: get to learn how to do it. And I think,

1144
00:51:41,440 --> 00:51:44,439
Speaker 2: especially with Sunlin, I was thinking about this a little

1145
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:47,920
Speaker 2: bit deeply because we did a campaign recently where we

1146
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:50,680
Speaker 2: were reflecting on our names a lot, and there's just, yeah,

1147
00:51:50,760 --> 00:51:53,680
Speaker 2: so much balance in our relationship we are when we

1148
00:51:53,719 --> 00:51:58,200
Speaker 2: talk about like our relationships as siblings, and we talk

1149
00:51:58,239 --> 00:52:01,279
Speaker 2: about like Somelin Gregory and for instance, someone and I

1150
00:52:01,320 --> 00:52:03,799
Speaker 2: are on opposite ends of the spectrum in a lot

1151
00:52:03,840 --> 00:52:05,080
Speaker 2: of the ways that we look at the world and

1152
00:52:05,120 --> 00:52:07,520
Speaker 2: the ways that we navigate the world, but we work

1153
00:52:07,880 --> 00:52:10,279
Speaker 2: in parallel with each other. And I think our mom

1154
00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:12,319
Speaker 2: did her big one and that it's so telling of

1155
00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:14,719
Speaker 2: who she is to have not put too much thought

1156
00:52:14,719 --> 00:52:16,880
Speaker 2: into it. She was like, yeah, it made me feel

1157
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:19,799
Speaker 2: good and it just felt right. And now we're doing

1158
00:52:19,840 --> 00:52:22,960
Speaker 2: all this reflecting now our moms like whatever brings joy,

1159
00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:26,520
Speaker 2: and now we're like, oh, there's other things. But I think, yeah,

1160
00:52:26,560 --> 00:52:28,640
Speaker 2: that's one of the bigger ways that is shown up

1161
00:52:28,680 --> 00:52:32,120
Speaker 2: is we have had to be super mindful of Okay, well,

1162
00:52:32,160 --> 00:52:34,520
Speaker 2: what space am I taking up? And how can I

1163
00:52:34,520 --> 00:52:36,319
Speaker 2: take up space in my own way while also be

1164
00:52:36,400 --> 00:52:39,080
Speaker 2: mindful of my sibling and how they're taking up space

1165
00:52:39,120 --> 00:52:41,040
Speaker 2: and what they need. And I think that was one

1166
00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:43,240
Speaker 2: of the biggest wake up calls as we've gotten odors

1167
00:52:43,880 --> 00:52:47,840
Speaker 2: being again curious and identifying what it is our siblings

1168
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:50,239
Speaker 2: need of us and how we can speak to those

1169
00:52:50,280 --> 00:52:53,520
Speaker 2: things in really specific ways, and knowing that someone can't

1170
00:52:53,560 --> 00:52:56,080
Speaker 2: read my mind and vice versa, so we've had to

1171
00:52:56,160 --> 00:52:58,520
Speaker 2: like communicate the things out loud so that we can

1172
00:52:58,560 --> 00:53:00,399
Speaker 2: show it better for each other. But we talked about

1173
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:02,560
Speaker 2: it all the time. When like a day isn't going

1174
00:53:02,560 --> 00:53:04,279
Speaker 2: great and I tell something, she used to get on

1175
00:53:04,320 --> 00:53:05,839
Speaker 2: her zoom and get the sun out so we can

1176
00:53:05,920 --> 00:53:10,719
Speaker 2: like turn things up, She's like, Okay, everything's handled. Skyward's

1177
00:53:10,719 --> 00:53:14,120
Speaker 2: got things going like it's definitely It's definitely shown up

1178
00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:16,480
Speaker 2: in a bunch of ways in our adulthood. I'd say,

1179
00:53:16,880 --> 00:53:17,480
Speaker 2: I love bit.

1180
00:53:18,120 --> 00:53:20,000
Speaker 1: It has been so much fun to get to know

1181
00:53:20,120 --> 00:53:22,680
Speaker 1: you more and to hear more about your beautiful relationship.

1182
00:53:22,680 --> 00:53:25,319
Speaker 1: Thank y'all so much for sharing so transparently with us.

1183
00:53:25,560 --> 00:53:27,880
Speaker 1: Please let us know where we can stay connected with

1184
00:53:27,960 --> 00:53:30,560
Speaker 1: you and hear more about set and all the exciting

1185
00:53:30,600 --> 00:53:32,799
Speaker 1: things you have going on Sunland. Do you have a

1186
00:53:32,800 --> 00:53:35,640
Speaker 1: website and any social media channels you'd like to share?

1187
00:53:37,120 --> 00:53:39,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, so my I feel like my main platform right

1188
00:53:39,640 --> 00:53:42,560
Speaker 3: now is Instagram. My Instagram is Sunland Sharia s U

1189
00:53:42,680 --> 00:53:45,719
Speaker 3: n L y n c h I R A y A,

1190
00:53:46,080 --> 00:53:49,040
Speaker 3: And my website is in the bio there it's speakons

1191
00:53:49,160 --> 00:53:52,640
Speaker 3: dot ai slash Sunland Sharia and that also has like

1192
00:53:52,680 --> 00:53:56,640
Speaker 3: all my DJing events for anything upcoming, primarily in DC

1193
00:53:56,800 --> 00:53:59,640
Speaker 3: in New York. But then our YouTube is at set

1194
00:53:59,680 --> 00:54:02,640
Speaker 3: dot com sessions and then Skyler can go ahead.

1195
00:54:03,000 --> 00:54:05,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was gonna be the first plug with set Sessions.

1196
00:54:05,360 --> 00:54:08,640
Speaker 2: We're hoping to contribute to it more intentionally and consistently.

1197
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:11,600
Speaker 2: And then I'm Skylar Marche on all platforms so Instagram,

1198
00:54:11,640 --> 00:54:15,960
Speaker 2: TikTok and occasionally on my partner's YouTube, but he's total

1199
00:54:16,040 --> 00:54:17,600
Speaker 2: tany over there, but I pop in there and do

1200
00:54:17,680 --> 00:54:19,960
Speaker 2: some work there too, But yeah, those are those are

1201
00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:22,759
Speaker 2: all of them. Thanks for having us, doctor Joy. This

1202
00:54:22,800 --> 00:54:25,480
Speaker 2: has been so so nice, he was telling so like,

1203
00:54:25,480 --> 00:54:28,360
Speaker 2: we just were so excited to do this. Thanks love that.

1204
00:54:28,560 --> 00:54:29,040
Speaker 2: I love that.

1205
00:54:29,160 --> 00:54:31,120
Speaker 1: I love that y'all spent some time with us today.

1206
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:39,280
Speaker 1: Thank you so much. I'm so glad Skyler and Something

1207
00:54:39,320 --> 00:54:42,120
Speaker 1: We're able to join me for today's conversation. To learn

1208
00:54:42,120 --> 00:54:44,200
Speaker 1: more about them and their work, be sure to visit

1209
00:54:44,239 --> 00:54:46,799
Speaker 1: the show notes at Therapy for Blackgirls dot com slash

1210
00:54:46,880 --> 00:54:49,799
Speaker 1: session for thirty six and don't forget to text this

1211
00:54:49,880 --> 00:54:51,960
Speaker 1: episode to two of your girls right now and tell

1212
00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:54,560
Speaker 1: them to check it out. Did you know that you

1213
00:54:54,560 --> 00:54:57,200
Speaker 1: could leave us a voicemail with your questions or suggestions

1214
00:54:57,200 --> 00:54:58,120
Speaker 1: for the podcast.

1215
00:54:58,640 --> 00:54:59,120
Speaker 2: If you have.

1216
00:54:59,160 --> 00:55:01,600
Speaker 1: Movies or books you'd like us to review, or have

1217
00:55:01,719 --> 00:55:04,640
Speaker 1: thoughts about topics you'd like us to discuss. Drop us

1218
00:55:04,640 --> 00:55:07,239
Speaker 1: a message at mimo dot fm slash Therapy for Black

1219
00:55:07,239 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 1: Girls and let us know what's on your mind. We

1220
00:55:09,680 --> 00:55:12,640
Speaker 1: just might feature it on the podcast. If you're looking

1221
00:55:12,680 --> 00:55:15,719
Speaker 1: for a therapist in your area, visit our therapist directory

1222
00:55:15,760 --> 00:55:19,880
Speaker 1: at Therapy for Blackgirls dot com slash directory. Don't forget

1223
00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:22,440
Speaker 1: to follow us over on Instagram at Therapy for Black

1224
00:55:22,440 --> 00:55:24,640
Speaker 1: Girls and come on over and join us in our

1225
00:55:24,680 --> 00:55:28,239
Speaker 1: Patreon channel at Therapy for Blackgirls dot com slash Patreon

1226
00:55:28,560 --> 00:55:32,040
Speaker 1: for exclusive updates, behind the scenes content, and much more.

1227
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:36,080
Speaker 1: This episode was produced by Alise Ellis Inde Chubou and

1228
00:55:36,160 --> 00:55:40,359
Speaker 1: Tyree Rush. Editing was done by Dennison Bradford. Thank y'all

1229
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:42,759
Speaker 1: so much for joining me again this week. I look

1230
00:55:42,800 --> 00:55:45,879
Speaker 1: forward to continuing this conversation with you all real soon.

1231
00:55:46,520 --> 00:55:47,200
Speaker 1: Take good care,