WEBVTT - Love, Hate and Robots 0:00:03.800 --> 0:00:06.680 Welcome to Stuff to Blow Your Mind from how Stuff 0:00:06.680 --> 0:00:14.040 Works dot com. Hey, welcome to Stuff to Blow your Mind. 0:00:14.120 --> 0:00:17.239 This is Robert Lamb and I'm Julie Douglas, and we 0:00:17.320 --> 0:00:20.239 are in the week of Valentine's right now. We're just 0:00:20.600 --> 0:00:25.200 completely amished in the Valentine's um season, with red and 0:00:25.239 --> 0:00:31.160 pink everywhere, hideous flowers in hideously priced flowers popping up 0:00:31.160 --> 0:00:34.360 everywhere in fact the podcast. But this is full of balloons, 0:00:34.400 --> 0:00:37.519 red balloons. Yes, it's really annoying. Who left these here? 0:00:39.040 --> 0:00:44.840 Tex stuff? Probably love birds. So that's the thing about Valentine's. 0:00:44.840 --> 0:00:48.280 It brings varying connotations. Uh, you know, it's a lot 0:00:48.320 --> 0:00:50.440 of people are really positive about it. It's a it's 0:00:50.479 --> 0:00:53.280 a bright, happy, fun time full of love. Other people 0:00:53.320 --> 0:00:57.920 may legitimately hate it, and uh, it's it's and so. 0:00:58.040 --> 0:01:00.960 And then of course you have the saying about how 0:01:01.600 --> 0:01:04.319 there's a thin line between love and hate, right, that's right, 0:01:04.920 --> 0:01:07.120 and uh and then while I've also seen people that 0:01:07.160 --> 0:01:08.880 get on the defensive about that, and it's like there's 0:01:08.880 --> 0:01:12.000 no thin line, there's the enormous canyon between love and hate. 0:01:12.240 --> 0:01:14.640 And uh, I don't know, but what do we have 0:01:14.720 --> 0:01:18.679 some information for you. So today we're we're gonna serve 0:01:18.720 --> 0:01:21.040 up a little bit of love, a little bit of hate, 0:01:21.480 --> 0:01:24.840 and some robots. Yeah yeah, so if the lover hate 0:01:24.840 --> 0:01:27.080 didn't have you, you know, stick around for the robots 0:01:27.760 --> 0:01:29.160 or come for the love and the hate, stay for 0:01:29.160 --> 0:01:31.839 the robot. That's right, That's what I say. That's your motto. 0:01:33.280 --> 0:01:35.640 So there's something called lammerence. Have you heard about this before? 0:01:36.280 --> 0:01:39.280 I actually had not heard of about this. I've I'm 0:01:39.319 --> 0:01:42.679 not really a you know, even when Valentine's is around, 0:01:42.680 --> 0:01:44.240 I'm not super you know, into it. So I have 0:01:44.319 --> 0:01:46.440 to I hadn't really like read a lot about the 0:01:46.480 --> 0:01:50.240 science of love well, and I didn't realize that that 0:01:50.480 --> 0:01:54.000 there's a term for when you are literally love sick. Yeah, 0:01:54.040 --> 0:01:56.160 like this is the moment, Like, you know, picture any 0:01:56.200 --> 0:02:00.200 any movie, any romantic comedy or whatever. John Cuzak that 0:02:00.360 --> 0:02:04.080 the boom box. Yeah, well, I'm thinking specifically, if you 0:02:04.080 --> 0:02:06.280 know where the guy looks up and he sees the 0:02:06.360 --> 0:02:08.560 woman of his dreams and then the music starts playing. 0:02:09.800 --> 0:02:14.160 That works. Yeah, it's like, but what's happening is limerits right, right, 0:02:14.440 --> 0:02:18.400 that person is connecting with a sort of near obsessive 0:02:18.520 --> 0:02:22.160 romantic love in his or her head, and there's all 0:02:22.200 --> 0:02:26.800 sorts of dopamine and uh VA's oppressing and all sorts 0:02:26.800 --> 0:02:31.040 of good like oxytocin the field. Good hormones are raging. Yes, 0:02:31.320 --> 0:02:33.760 because and and then and there the judgment part of 0:02:33.800 --> 0:02:36.399 their brain is kind of shutting down a little bit. Right. 0:02:37.000 --> 0:02:39.600 But but okay, so how do we know this? Well, 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:42.400 we can hook love birds up to an m r I, Right, 0:02:42.440 --> 0:02:45.280 I mean, what else should we do but hook love 0:02:45.360 --> 0:02:49.120 birds up what's going on in that love sick head 0:02:49.160 --> 0:02:51.639 of their all? Right, So you know that the cool 0:02:51.680 --> 0:02:53.120 thing about the fm R I is that it can 0:02:53.320 --> 0:02:56.760 measure basically the blood flow to certain regions of the brain. Right. 0:02:56.919 --> 0:03:00.040 And when we look at at the images off and 0:03:00.080 --> 0:03:02.560 you'll see like bright colors and all. And that's just 0:03:02.639 --> 0:03:06.079 marking where where blood is moving around and where neural 0:03:06.120 --> 0:03:08.799 activity is taking place. Right. So, someone, so if someone's 0:03:08.840 --> 0:03:11.080 eating chocolate, or they're playing pac Man, or they just 0:03:11.639 --> 0:03:13.920 they want a lot of money, or they're in love, 0:03:14.040 --> 0:03:15.920 we see the reward center of their brains start to 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:18.720 light up like a pinball machine. Yeah, So that's how 0:03:18.760 --> 0:03:23.320 we know when you're in limerince that do doesn't sound sexy. 0:03:23.320 --> 0:03:27.160 It doesn't I'm in Limerince Happy Limrince day. Yeah, it 0:03:27.240 --> 0:03:31.239 doesn't work. So the thing I thought was really interesting 0:03:31.240 --> 0:03:34.480 about this too is that um, according to an author 0:03:35.280 --> 0:03:39.000 of Anatomy of Love, Dr Helen Fisher, that when you 0:03:39.120 --> 0:03:45.000 are going through these changes, the reason I would yeah 0:03:45.240 --> 0:03:49.360 the love doctor, the limerence doctor, Dr Helen Fisher. Um. 0:03:49.440 --> 0:03:52.960 She basically says that when you're heartbroken, hormones hormones can 0:03:53.040 --> 0:03:56.480 change again and you get another dopamine boasts boost. Excuse me, 0:03:56.640 --> 0:03:58.120 so you know when you first fall in love and 0:03:58.120 --> 0:04:01.680 you get that dopamine boost, um, do you sometimes you know, 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:03.720 for some people who have experienced this sport, do you 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:06.080 sometimes have a hard time eating? You're not really hungry. 0:04:06.520 --> 0:04:10.760 That's the hormones changing. So the same thing occurs when 0:04:10.840 --> 0:04:14.760 you have a breakup or heartache, that that dopamine boost 0:04:14.800 --> 0:04:16.800 is happening again and you don't feel like eating. So 0:04:16.839 --> 0:04:18.240 you could have like one person would be like, oh, 0:04:18.279 --> 0:04:19.920 I'm so in love, I forgot to eat lunch today, 0:04:19.960 --> 0:04:22.680 and the other person's like, like, my girlfriend just broke 0:04:22.760 --> 0:04:24.480 up with me, I forgot to eat lunch to day. Yeah, 0:04:24.680 --> 0:04:27.599 that's the same thing going on, right right, in the 0:04:27.600 --> 0:04:32.359 break room right now. So you had talked about the 0:04:32.400 --> 0:04:34.920 thin line between love and hate. Yeah, there's an interesting 0:04:34.920 --> 0:04:38.960 study from the University College London where they actually you 0:04:38.960 --> 0:04:41.200 actually had this one researcher, I believe his name was. 0:04:42.480 --> 0:04:46.080 It is Sameer Zeki, smeer Zeki. So Zeke has has 0:04:46.200 --> 0:04:49.000 co workers, colleagues, and he's pretty sure that one of 0:04:49.040 --> 0:04:51.800 them hates him. Right, Yeah, He's like, this dude just 0:04:51.920 --> 0:04:54.200 hates me. What's going on? He seems to just hate me? 0:04:54.480 --> 0:04:56.560 And then he starts looking into a little moment. He's like, like, 0:04:56.600 --> 0:04:58.960 you know, and I think we've all had this with 0:04:58.960 --> 0:05:02.120 with various people. We like, I think this guy hates everybody. Right, 0:05:02.120 --> 0:05:04.960 he realizes it's not just him, Like, this guy's irrational, 0:05:05.240 --> 0:05:07.600 this guy is miserable, and he's done everything he Kenny's 0:05:07.600 --> 0:05:09.600 tried to befriend, this guy has been nice to him, 0:05:09.600 --> 0:05:14.200 he's whatever, and this this guy still has hatred toward him. 0:05:14.279 --> 0:05:16.960 But being a scientist, the the answer is, let's scan it. 0:05:17.040 --> 0:05:19.400 Let's figure out what's going on. Yes, let's nail this down. 0:05:19.640 --> 0:05:21.840 Let's figure out this hate thing. And the interesting thing 0:05:21.839 --> 0:05:25.720 about this is that um sameer Ziki and Andrea's Bartol's 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:29.960 they conducted a previous study about love UM and they 0:05:30.000 --> 0:05:32.120 used f M R I of course, and they scanned 0:05:32.200 --> 0:05:35.239 the brains the seventeen volunteers who described themselves as truly 0:05:35.400 --> 0:05:38.800 and madly in love. And so during the scans, each 0:05:38.800 --> 0:05:41.599 of them was shown pictures of their loved ones and 0:05:41.640 --> 0:05:44.600 then other pictures of neutral people. And so that's how 0:05:44.640 --> 0:05:46.760 they could figure out that this part of the brain 0:05:47.480 --> 0:05:51.840 lights up when someone is in love, right, So that 0:05:52.000 --> 0:05:55.200 is that that was sort of the the impetus for 0:05:55.320 --> 0:05:58.360 Zeki saying, okay, we know where love is, let's find 0:05:58.360 --> 0:06:00.720 out about this hate and why my colleague hates. So yeah, 0:06:00.720 --> 0:06:03.720 so they they they ended up doing the same thing 0:06:03.760 --> 0:06:06.760 with with with some other test subjects where they they 0:06:06.800 --> 0:06:09.320 showed them pictures of people they hate it right, And 0:06:09.440 --> 0:06:11.960 what they found was that the all right, when when 0:06:12.000 --> 0:06:14.400 someone when you're doing the love experiment, like people would 0:06:14.400 --> 0:06:16.520 see someone they love and the love circuit with one 0:06:16.680 --> 0:06:20.080 light up the terminology and um that they were using 0:06:20.240 --> 0:06:23.279 the circuit. And then but then in this other experiment, 0:06:23.320 --> 0:06:25.520 people would see someone they hate, the hate circuit would 0:06:25.680 --> 0:06:27.520 would light up. But the hate circuit in the love 0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:31.839 circuit the same area, right, so the same neural circuit. Yeah, 0:06:32.040 --> 0:06:34.720 so I'm on one level there you go. I mean 0:06:34.720 --> 0:06:37.000 that's the love and hate are are sharing some of 0:06:37.000 --> 0:06:40.160 the same neural architecture, right, And it turns out that 0:06:40.200 --> 0:06:42.800 these are two specific brain regions, right, it's the putaman 0:06:43.480 --> 0:06:46.640 and the insular cortex. Yeah. The putaman is used to 0:06:46.760 --> 0:06:49.560 prepare the body for movements. So to put it in 0:06:49.640 --> 0:06:53.040 like real caveman terms, it would be like, oh, there's 0:06:53.040 --> 0:06:56.279 a pretty girl, I'll go get her, and then the 0:06:56.279 --> 0:06:58.359 other one is there's my enemy, I will go clube. 0:06:58.360 --> 0:07:00.360 I guess you might have the caveman would stare typically 0:07:00.360 --> 0:07:03.200 club either, right, he would just there would be more 0:07:03.200 --> 0:07:06.800 bludgeoning involved with the enemy and more of a loving 0:07:07.279 --> 0:07:10.240 a love tap with the cudgel on the head of 0:07:10.280 --> 0:07:15.880 the intended naming right exactly hopefully, and then the and 0:07:15.880 --> 0:07:17.560 then of course you could also say that this is 0:07:17.600 --> 0:07:19.960 also like oh you would you would run to the 0:07:19.960 --> 0:07:22.160 pudman is saying, who I love that person, I'm going 0:07:22.200 --> 0:07:24.520 to run to help them and keep them from falling 0:07:24.560 --> 0:07:27.840 off that cliff, whereas with the enemy would be like 0:07:27.840 --> 0:07:29.840 like always totally teetering on the edge of that Cliff, 0:07:29.880 --> 0:07:33.040 I better give him a good kick. So that's the pudman. 0:07:33.200 --> 0:07:36.080 And then there's again the insula, which is associated with 0:07:36.120 --> 0:07:40.320 feelings of distress and jealousy. Right again, that would for 0:07:40.360 --> 0:07:43.000 both situations, right right, Yeah, it's like, oh that dude 0:07:43.040 --> 0:07:46.000 so successful, I hate him? Or uh you know, or 0:07:47.480 --> 0:07:50.240 yeah I'm jealous. Yeah, do you love pac Man more 0:07:50.280 --> 0:07:52.600 than me? Why are you playing it so much? You know? 0:07:52.800 --> 0:07:54.400 The thing I think is really interesting about the study 0:07:54.440 --> 0:07:57.160 is that Zeke was kind of disappointing because he thought 0:07:57.280 --> 0:08:02.760 that the that the prefrontal cortex, where the seat of 0:08:02.840 --> 0:08:05.840 judgment is and reasoning, he thought that that was going 0:08:05.880 --> 0:08:09.320 to be deactivated a bit like it is with love 0:08:09.440 --> 0:08:12.120 and hate. And his idea was that, you know, if 0:08:12.120 --> 0:08:17.440 it's an irrational hatred, therefore you know someone's uh faculties 0:08:17.480 --> 0:08:19.960 should be a little bit dimmed. Right, But it's the reverse, 0:08:20.000 --> 0:08:21.440 I mean, were not the reverse. But it's more a 0:08:21.440 --> 0:08:24.239 situation where when you're when you're in love, the judgment 0:08:24.640 --> 0:08:28.720 falls off. But love is love is blind right when 0:08:28.720 --> 0:08:32.000 you're in love, right, because you're you're reasoning dems. But 0:08:32.160 --> 0:08:34.520 right when when you're hating, apparently you still have the 0:08:34.559 --> 0:08:38.920 ability to think analytically, and of course his idea is like, Okay, 0:08:38.920 --> 0:08:41.880 well that means that maybe because the pudamin is also 0:08:42.600 --> 0:08:45.680 um in action here, that the two would would allow 0:08:45.720 --> 0:08:48.280 someone to attack another person. Yeah, essentially. Yeah, I mean 0:08:48.320 --> 0:08:49.839 it's kind of like if you see, if there's somebody 0:08:50.000 --> 0:08:52.199 like or even love and they have kind of goofy hair, 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:54.360 you're probably gonna let it go or not think about it, right, 0:08:54.559 --> 0:08:57.000 but if you red flag, Yeah, I mean, goofy hair 0:08:57.040 --> 0:08:59.000 is fun. But if you hate somebody and they have 0:08:59.000 --> 0:09:01.640 goofy hair, you'd be like, you look at his hair 0:09:02.480 --> 0:09:07.000 con Brian every night. So I don't hate him. I 0:09:07.160 --> 0:09:10.520 actually like him quite a bit. Um So Yeah, So 0:09:10.559 --> 0:09:13.520 that that's kind of covers that whole like thin line 0:09:13.520 --> 0:09:16.840 between love and hate. Definitely got the same circuits going 0:09:16.920 --> 0:09:20.560 on there. And then there's this other question that's recently 0:09:20.600 --> 0:09:23.880 cropped up, and it's that can you really fall in 0:09:23.960 --> 0:09:26.079 love and a fifth of a second love at first sight? 0:09:26.200 --> 0:09:28.880 Right right staring out in the crowd, seeing the woman 0:09:29.000 --> 0:09:30.920 or man of your dreams standing over there, and just 0:09:31.760 --> 0:09:36.920 and then you know, the music off string quartet rises. 0:09:37.200 --> 0:09:42.160 There's a study by Syracuse University professor Sephanie ortigue, and 0:09:42.640 --> 0:09:45.600 she determined that falling in love has the same eufork 0:09:45.840 --> 0:09:49.240 feeling as using cocaine, but also that affects intellectual areas 0:09:49.240 --> 0:09:51.880 of the brain, which is interesting. It is essentially running 0:09:51.920 --> 0:09:56.000 more blood to those areas dealing with mental representations, metaphors, 0:09:56.080 --> 0:09:58.960 and body image, and that it can also take less 0:09:58.960 --> 0:10:01.280 than a fifth of a second love. Now, let let 0:10:01.360 --> 0:10:03.280 me break down the cocaine thing for a second. For 0:10:03.880 --> 0:10:05.880 anyone to get down, I will break it down. And 0:10:06.000 --> 0:10:08.320 I got that. I grabbed this data from from our 0:10:08.400 --> 0:10:12.120 excellent article by Stephanie Watson on how stuff works called 0:10:12.200 --> 0:10:16.000 how crack Cocaine works. All right, crack cocaine you smoke, 0:10:16.280 --> 0:10:19.840 so it gives the brain much faster than inhaled powder cocaine. 0:10:20.120 --> 0:10:23.280 All right, So crack cocaine gets the brain and creates 0:10:23.280 --> 0:10:27.240 a high within ten to fifteen seconds. Normal cocaine is 0:10:27.440 --> 0:10:31.080 ten to fifteen minutes um. And then the effects can 0:10:31.160 --> 0:10:34.560 last anywhere from five to fifteen minutes. And then you 0:10:34.600 --> 0:10:37.000 have to do more cocaine because it you know, it 0:10:37.200 --> 0:10:41.360 kind of sucks. So don't do drugs. Do more love, Yeah, 0:10:41.440 --> 0:10:44.240 because love is We're gonna explore, like you fall in 0:10:44.280 --> 0:10:47.920 love like that stuff's gonna last fifteen months at least, 0:10:48.000 --> 0:10:51.920 you know, cocaine fifteen minutes and then you know, it's 0:10:52.040 --> 0:10:55.200 just that's exactly right. That's that's the whole limbrance is 0:10:55.200 --> 0:10:57.640 what the shelf life is fifteen months for limrance kind 0:10:57.640 --> 0:10:59.520 of love. Yeah, love in one hand cocaine and the 0:10:59.559 --> 0:11:02.440 other one you're just going to do you for for 0:11:02.480 --> 0:11:05.080 several months either you're just gonna be keeping doing cocaine 0:11:05.080 --> 0:11:07.760 over and over again. So I think love is the 0:11:07.760 --> 0:11:10.600 obvious winner here. Yeah, they really need to rethink their 0:11:10.600 --> 0:11:13.160 p s a s for for anti drug commercial saying 0:11:13.200 --> 0:11:16.880 like they need to rethink the cocaine ad campaign that 0:11:16.920 --> 0:11:20.920 they're not really getting it out. Yeah, those cocaine marketing 0:11:20.920 --> 0:11:24.440 people are really asleep at the wheel. Um. But that 0:11:24.559 --> 0:11:27.120 study is interesting because it really does sort of indicate 0:11:27.200 --> 0:11:30.000 that it's the that the sort of passionate love is 0:11:30.000 --> 0:11:33.160 is again it's centered in the reward center, whereas like 0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:37.000 an eternal love for more long term love is found 0:11:37.040 --> 0:11:40.840 in the middle brain and supposedly like a mother for 0:11:40.880 --> 0:11:44.480 a child or or you know, or a child for 0:11:44.600 --> 0:11:47.160 a parent, right, yeah, or a copy I love to us, 0:11:47.200 --> 0:11:50.600 And that's sort of like a hasn't there's a different 0:11:50.600 --> 0:11:53.520 types of love that's like a like a church thing, 0:11:53.600 --> 0:11:56.520 right where I've seen I've seen church programs that are Yeah, 0:11:56.559 --> 0:11:58.880 there's some there. I think there are some that use 0:11:59.320 --> 0:12:01.800 that term. But I think it's one of like five 0:12:01.840 --> 0:12:04.839 different kinds of groovy loves you can have. Anytime I 0:12:05.040 --> 0:12:07.040 year a gup a love or at likes used to 0:12:07.120 --> 0:12:09.199 I would I would think of Guppy's in love, you know, 0:12:09.360 --> 0:12:13.080 so I think a little a little like you know, 0:12:13.240 --> 0:12:17.679 Salamander has creatures falling in love, guffies in love. All right, 0:12:23.800 --> 0:12:27.319 This presentation is brought to you by Intel Sponsors of Tomorrow. 0:12:31.920 --> 0:12:34.160 But supposedly they're supposed to have a follow up study 0:12:34.160 --> 0:12:36.000 about the fifth of a second thing because that's sort 0:12:36.040 --> 0:12:38.400 of interesting, like you know, fifth of a second you 0:12:38.400 --> 0:12:41.000 can uh, you know, how do how do they know? 0:12:41.080 --> 0:12:44.040 Because that's the specifics weren't necessarily available. Well, I guess 0:12:44.200 --> 0:12:46.240 you'd have to hook machinery up to like the kind 0:12:46.240 --> 0:12:48.079 of person who just falls in and out of love 0:12:48.120 --> 0:12:49.520 a lot, like you know, kind of like a Don 0:12:49.600 --> 0:12:52.200 Draper for Madman type, you know. Yeah, okay, so they 0:12:52.200 --> 0:12:55.680 had to have like a high limbrance yeah quality well 0:12:56.080 --> 0:12:58.600 or or at least I'm not sure how it would 0:12:58.640 --> 0:13:00.880 be the kind of person who would can suitably fall 0:13:00.920 --> 0:13:03.440 in love and fall in love because because if you 0:13:03.480 --> 0:13:06.160 have high limeriance, aren't you more inclined to fall in 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:08.640 love like once and stay in love? For saying DeAndre 0:13:08.720 --> 0:13:12.120 for shouldn't we just say lust? Yeah? Okay, he's become 0:13:12.200 --> 0:13:17.880 the icon of stupid man lust yeah yeah yeah, And 0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:20.360 you know a couple of ladies have I think perhaps 0:13:20.440 --> 0:13:23.520 listed after him. Um. But then that brings me to 0:13:23.920 --> 0:13:25.800 the question about whether or not we could actually have 0:13:25.880 --> 0:13:34.480 like a true love, true love, true love like no, yeah, yeah, 0:13:34.559 --> 0:13:38.840 like I don't know, like a completely um unmitigated love. 0:13:39.000 --> 0:13:43.360 Could you have that limbrince your entire life? Right if 0:13:43.360 --> 0:13:45.920 it weren't a lust limerence, if it was a pure love. 0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:50.480 So previous research has laid out the fracture points in 0:13:50.480 --> 0:13:53.080 a relationship to be twelve to fifteen months, So BEINGO, 0:13:53.200 --> 0:13:57.320 there's there's your you're saying like love can in many 0:13:57.360 --> 0:13:59.800 studies last fifteen months, right, and then you've got three 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:03.360 is another sort of breaking point. And then the seven 0:14:03.400 --> 0:14:06.400 year itch that we've all heard about. And I think 0:14:06.480 --> 0:14:08.920 one thing that or at least my take on this 0:14:08.960 --> 0:14:11.360 is that when when you're saying love ends after fifteen months, 0:14:11.360 --> 0:14:14.080 we're not saying like, oh what am I doing here? 0:14:14.120 --> 0:14:15.880 It's like waking up for a dream and realizing you're 0:14:16.040 --> 0:14:19.160 you're in this life you want. You know, it's this 0:14:19.160 --> 0:14:22.320 this chemical thing that maybe it definitely becomes something else. 0:14:22.480 --> 0:14:25.600 You know, well, yeah, you're the chemical sort of calibrate 0:14:25.600 --> 0:14:28.760 and they'd have to write, I suppose, yeah. I think 0:14:28.760 --> 0:14:30.920 it's like, it's pretty obvious. This is we're kind of 0:14:31.440 --> 0:14:34.720 stating an obvious fact here, But love really powerful. Oh 0:14:34.800 --> 0:14:37.160 I just fell in love that that tends to calm 0:14:37.200 --> 0:14:39.480 down and become something more mature over time, right, Like, 0:14:39.520 --> 0:14:42.680 can you imagine having that horrible, obsessive teenager e kind 0:14:42.680 --> 0:14:49.000 of love applied in your adult relationships? Because because general, 0:14:49.080 --> 0:14:51.720 you know, love is great, and I love it when 0:14:51.760 --> 0:14:54.480 my friends are in love. But but man, it's kind 0:14:54.480 --> 0:14:56.160 of tough to be around them if they're they've only 0:14:56.200 --> 0:14:57.960 like if they're you know, they've only been in love 0:14:58.000 --> 0:15:00.240 with somebody for like, you know, a month or so, yeah, 0:15:00.320 --> 0:15:02.480 and they're like, wow, you guys really are not over 0:15:02.480 --> 0:15:05.600 this yet. Just like take it down a notch. Wow, 0:15:05.640 --> 0:15:09.160 you really drove past the house like fifty times again 0:15:09.600 --> 0:15:13.880 this evening making out of my living room. What's going on? Stop? Yeah? Yeah? 0:15:14.720 --> 0:15:19.280 Um So, researchers from Stony Brook, you in New York, 0:15:19.280 --> 0:15:23.280 compared the longtime couple's brains a group of longtime couple 0:15:23.320 --> 0:15:26.880 springs to newly minted in love couples, and they found 0:15:26.880 --> 0:15:29.360 that one in ten of the long time couples there 0:15:29.360 --> 0:15:32.800 were twenty of them exhibited the same chemical reactions when 0:15:32.840 --> 0:15:36.320 shown photographs of their loved ones as people commonly do 0:15:36.400 --> 0:15:38.800 in the early stages of relationship. This limitans that we're 0:15:38.840 --> 0:15:41.280 talking about. They're kind of super lovers. They call them 0:15:41.320 --> 0:15:45.400 swans because they meet for life. Right. Yeah, So it's 0:15:45.400 --> 0:15:49.000 it's interesting because, um again you've got that the fading 0:15:49.040 --> 0:15:53.400 point fifteen months um in the testosterone levels actually fade 0:15:53.960 --> 0:15:56.920 as the Hornburger limit. I think, no kidding, my goodness, 0:15:57.120 --> 0:16:03.080 yeah yeah, I just blushed and I have no idea why. Um, 0:16:03.160 --> 0:16:05.440 but their testotering levels are fading back to normal, right, 0:16:05.640 --> 0:16:08.520 and they still have like those shots of oxytocin um 0:16:08.560 --> 0:16:11.400 to create a feeling of attachment, because that's that's really 0:16:11.440 --> 0:16:13.720 what this spoils down to. But they don't have the 0:16:13.760 --> 0:16:16.720 wild love. So the feelings of obsession in theory, they 0:16:16.720 --> 0:16:20.360 shouldn't survive, right, they shouldn't be these couples shouldn't be 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:23.400 having the same sort of reaction, chemical reaction as he's 0:16:23.480 --> 0:16:26.040 untually minted. It's kind of like if you're going to 0:16:26.160 --> 0:16:28.360 perform surgery on somebody you want, you know, you may 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:31.320 numb them up or not surgery. Let's say a dental procedure. 0:16:31.640 --> 0:16:34.720 You may numb them up to perform this quick, fairly, 0:16:35.040 --> 0:16:36.920 you know, simple procedure. But then you want that numbness 0:16:36.960 --> 0:16:39.320 to wear off so they can feeling again and actually 0:16:39.400 --> 0:16:43.040 use their mouth like a normal person. But uh, but 0:16:43.080 --> 0:16:45.160 it's but it's like the when the love lingers, when 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:47.880 the limericks remain so intense for so long, it's like, 0:16:48.320 --> 0:16:50.440 to a certain extence, kind of outlived its usefulness. Like 0:16:50.480 --> 0:16:53.680 it's more about like, let's let's get this, uh, let's 0:16:53.680 --> 0:16:56.400 get this relationship started. Let's go let's get everything sealed 0:16:56.440 --> 0:16:58.360 up and ready. It's like, you know, let's hire a 0:16:58.440 --> 0:17:01.160 hundred guys to start building this this this house, and 0:17:01.160 --> 0:17:03.040 then we'll split the work crew down to fifty to 0:17:03.160 --> 0:17:05.960 get the real work done, right, right, So, but then 0:17:06.119 --> 0:17:09.000 the researchers were kind of like, well, so, what why 0:17:09.080 --> 0:17:11.879 is it that they have this chemical reaction? And and 0:17:11.920 --> 0:17:15.040 they're not like sitting here like frenching on the waiting 0:17:15.320 --> 0:17:17.719 room couch as we're doing this study, Like why are they? 0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:21.000 You know, they they seem to be these longtime couples 0:17:21.240 --> 0:17:23.119 and love with each other, but they're not like this 0:17:23.200 --> 0:17:25.000 other group that's they're all french ing on the couch. 0:17:25.119 --> 0:17:26.480 But I just made all that up. But you know 0:17:26.480 --> 0:17:28.800 what I'm saying, they're trying to figure out why why 0:17:28.840 --> 0:17:31.320 their brains are reacting this way. So it's kind of 0:17:31.359 --> 0:17:33.520 like it's the difference between saying like a really old 0:17:33.520 --> 0:17:36.200 couple and that they're still in love and going ah, 0:17:36.240 --> 0:17:37.680 and then a really old couple that was still in 0:17:37.720 --> 0:17:42.120 love and going yeah, yeah, exactly exactly. And so they 0:17:42.200 --> 0:17:44.760 said in there, in sort of I think clinical terms, 0:17:44.960 --> 0:17:47.280 they said that that sort of romantic love was able 0:17:47.359 --> 0:17:52.919 to mature into intensive companionship and sexual liveliness. So the 0:17:52.960 --> 0:17:56.080 Swans they could control themselves. I suppose that's that's the 0:17:56.119 --> 0:18:00.639 mature part of it. Yeah, I hope. Yeah, they're not 0:18:00.680 --> 0:18:03.840 just completely out of control out there. Okay, I'm imagining 0:18:03.840 --> 0:18:06.640 that they're not their brains are still letting up because 0:18:06.640 --> 0:18:09.480 they truly and madly still love each other. The the 0:18:09.560 --> 0:18:12.680 key here, I'm guessing is that Swans need to find Swans, 0:18:13.960 --> 0:18:15.359 and and that would seem to like, how do you 0:18:15.400 --> 0:18:17.400 do You can't really like put put that out there 0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:19.280 and be like, I'm a person that will you know, 0:18:19.320 --> 0:18:20.800 fall in love with you and stay in love with 0:18:20.840 --> 0:18:22.760 you forever. I just need somebody else who's exactly the 0:18:22.800 --> 0:18:24.359 same as me, because it seems like you're going to 0:18:24.400 --> 0:18:26.480 get a lot of people who are just just like, 0:18:26.520 --> 0:18:28.000 oh that sounds who doesn't want to fall in love 0:18:28.000 --> 0:18:30.320 with somebody who's gonna love you back forever and be 0:18:30.400 --> 0:18:32.639 like powerfully in love with you, you you know? Is this 0:18:32.680 --> 0:18:36.040 your your dating website idea? Yeah, Like if the Swans 0:18:36.080 --> 0:18:37.760 had their own dating site, is that I feel like 0:18:37.760 --> 0:18:41.320 people would abuse that. Yeah, they would. They would claim 0:18:41.359 --> 0:18:43.440 to be a Swan and not be a Swan unless 0:18:43.480 --> 0:18:46.600 the thing is that you had mandatory like brain scans, 0:18:47.440 --> 0:18:49.240 because I believe that actually, to go back to the 0:18:49.680 --> 0:18:53.440 hate Circuit researcher, that was one of the possible uses 0:18:53.440 --> 0:18:55.760 they were talking about. It's like being able to have 0:18:55.880 --> 0:18:59.280 the the evidence admissible in court so that it's like, hey, 0:18:59.320 --> 0:19:02.280 I think so and so murdered. Uh, um, Dave here 0:19:02.320 --> 0:19:04.840 because uh he hates him. Let's test him and cev 0:19:04.840 --> 0:19:07.160 he hates and show him a picture. Oh red light 0:19:07.200 --> 0:19:09.280 lit up. That means he hates it and that he 0:19:09.320 --> 0:19:11.760 totally hates him. I like this idea. It's like a 0:19:11.920 --> 0:19:14.840 like a photo booth for love, right, except for you're 0:19:14.840 --> 0:19:17.760 getting your brain scanned. Yeah, well, kind of like they 0:19:17.760 --> 0:19:20.800 all like they have those uh those old contraptions where 0:19:20.800 --> 0:19:23.360 you like the love tester where you like squeeze a 0:19:23.520 --> 0:19:25.879 joystick and then it lights up to show how how 0:19:25.920 --> 0:19:28.159 much you love. It would be kind of having like 0:19:28.240 --> 0:19:31.719 having a scientifically accurate one of those. And then every 0:19:31.760 --> 0:19:33.800 little like you're getting people getting a fight with their 0:19:33.800 --> 0:19:35.720 spouse or something and they're like, do you still love me? 0:19:35.960 --> 0:19:37.880 And it was like, yeah, of course, prove it. We're 0:19:37.880 --> 0:19:41.800 going down to these shownees where they have that love 0:19:42.359 --> 0:19:45.080 love tester up and we're gonna we're gonna test this. Yeah, 0:19:45.240 --> 0:19:47.040 and think about I mean, Larry King could have really 0:19:47.600 --> 0:19:50.480 you've been helped out by this. I think, Yeah, I'm 0:19:50.480 --> 0:19:53.160 not up enough of my Larry King lore. Oh he's 0:19:53.200 --> 0:19:56.280 he's sort of like the Elizabeth Taylor of the world. Yeah, 0:19:56.320 --> 0:19:58.000 he just keeps getting married and married over again. But 0:19:58.040 --> 0:20:00.840 maybe it doesn't Maybe he's not really he doesn't care 0:20:00.880 --> 0:20:04.440 about that that reward center lighting up in his partner's brain. Okay, 0:20:04.560 --> 0:20:07.240 so you thinking it would have this technology would have 0:20:07.280 --> 0:20:10.800 helped Larry King find merited out a true mate for him? 0:20:10.960 --> 0:20:12.240 Or is it? Or is the reverse? I mean, I 0:20:12.280 --> 0:20:14.040 don't know enough about him. Is it a situation where 0:20:14.200 --> 0:20:17.080 the rest of the world needed this device to protect 0:20:17.160 --> 0:20:22.560 them from Larry King? That may very well be actually 0:20:22.680 --> 0:20:26.679 the answer right there. Um. Yeah, so I like that. 0:20:26.840 --> 0:20:29.080 I'm liking this idea of the sort of photo booth 0:20:29.880 --> 0:20:32.320 scan that couples can just duck into and then they 0:20:32.359 --> 0:20:34.359 can show their children later on, like here's this little 0:20:34.359 --> 0:20:37.440 film strip of us in love our brains look at it. Well. 0:20:37.480 --> 0:20:39.040 That was another thing they brought up, is that by 0:20:39.119 --> 0:20:42.960 under the more we understand love and and ultimately hate 0:20:43.000 --> 0:20:45.720