WEBVTT - Looking for a Rainbow 0:00:01.840 --> 0:00:09.080 Wind down Kramer micro coffin and oh that's good. We've 0:00:09.119 --> 0:00:13.760 never really added that aspect is to it? Ah, I did, 0:00:14.800 --> 0:00:19.880 I'm a day in paradise. In paradise, I am. I'm 0:00:19.920 --> 0:00:25.040 really excited because next week we are announcing something huge, 0:00:25.760 --> 0:00:28.120 beak Time, that we've been working on forever, and I'm 0:00:28.160 --> 0:00:34.720 just so excited to announce it. What do you know? No, 0:00:35.479 --> 0:00:39.320 I can't tell you you know, I just you know, 0:00:38.479 --> 0:00:41.600 you know, but you like, you know, you know, you 0:00:41.680 --> 0:00:44.640 just don't know which one? Do they know that we 0:00:44.760 --> 0:00:48.600 know that they know. Um, y'all know the voice, it's 0:00:48.640 --> 0:00:57.000 Sarah Gretzky. Um. Well, first things first, I heard from 0:00:57.040 --> 0:00:59.560 a friend that l A just got shut down until August. 0:01:00.200 --> 0:01:04.600 Is that true? Well, the so that's like the rumor 0:01:04.640 --> 0:01:07.200 because apparently the l A Times, like I wrote an 0:01:07.280 --> 0:01:09.840 article and then the mayor came out yesterday and was 0:01:09.920 --> 0:01:13.240 like scolding the l A Times and was like I 0:01:13.280 --> 0:01:15.919 never said that, Like this is all just media hyping 0:01:15.959 --> 0:01:18.520 it up. I just said that it's not opening soon. 0:01:18.800 --> 0:01:23.240 So here we are not knowing who to believe. But 0:01:23.880 --> 0:01:29.080 I don't know. It's frustrating, very um makes me thankful 0:01:29.080 --> 0:01:32.320 that we're not there. Yeah, yeah, I just I missed 0:01:32.360 --> 0:01:36.279 the I miss just the beach though, Like I missed 0:01:36.640 --> 0:01:39.880 being outside and that where you can be outside every 0:01:39.880 --> 0:01:42.240 single day. Yeah, for sure. But I was just talking 0:01:42.280 --> 0:01:45.000 to you know, somebody's out there recently and they're just 0:01:45.000 --> 0:01:48.200 talking about how, you know, especially somewhere as populated as 0:01:48.200 --> 0:01:50.440 they are with it being so nice out, half the 0:01:50.480 --> 0:01:52.960 people are listening and staying quarantine doing that, and yeah, 0:01:53.280 --> 0:01:55.640 half the people just like if it, I'm going to 0:01:55.640 --> 0:02:01.360 the beach, I'm doing this, I'm doing that. Yeah, it's chaos. 0:02:01.720 --> 0:02:06.320 The nice weather helps, but doesn't help, you know. It 0:02:06.560 --> 0:02:08.760 rained the other day and I was like, wow, I 0:02:08.760 --> 0:02:11.600 bet this is the first time people have actually stayed 0:02:11.600 --> 0:02:14.000 inside because it just makes it easier. When it's nice out, 0:02:14.040 --> 0:02:15.840 you want to get outside. You want to get fresh 0:02:15.880 --> 0:02:18.359 air of the sun. But I don't know, we need 0:02:18.360 --> 0:02:26.640 this to end, all right, Sarah. So, um, I feel 0:02:26.639 --> 0:02:31.920 the energy. I know. Um, I like, I'm so anxious. 0:02:32.000 --> 0:02:37.280 I can't So do you do you want to? I 0:02:37.400 --> 0:02:39.920 just I want you to have the floor because something 0:02:39.960 --> 0:02:46.320 happened and you know you're yeah. I just I just 0:02:46.400 --> 0:02:51.160 love you, and um go for it, my friend. How 0:02:51.200 --> 0:02:53.440 are you feeling though? Like just like just to start 0:02:53.520 --> 0:02:57.320 it off, like are you nervous right now? To yeah, 0:02:57.360 --> 0:03:01.520 I'm nervous, I'm anxious. I'm so anxious, but I am 0:03:01.639 --> 0:03:07.359 I feel fine, like my body feels fine. Um. Well, 0:03:08.080 --> 0:03:11.320 I guess I'll just come right out and I can 0:03:11.360 --> 0:03:17.200 go into detail. But I um and miscarry during quarantine, 0:03:18.200 --> 0:03:23.440 which feels so weird to say. It feels weird to 0:03:24.000 --> 0:03:26.960 not like it. I'm admitting something, but it feels weird 0:03:27.000 --> 0:03:33.520 to like acknowledge. Um. Two weeks into quarantine, when we 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:38.640 were in Colorado, I just I just had the It 0:03:38.680 --> 0:03:40.880 all sounds so cliche, but it was just that feeling. 0:03:40.920 --> 0:03:45.640 And it was that I felt so sick, and I'm like, okay, 0:03:45.640 --> 0:03:50.880 my options are corona or I'm pregnant, and both of 0:03:50.920 --> 0:03:53.440 them scared me. And so I took a pregnancy test 0:03:53.600 --> 0:03:55.680 and then I took ten, and then I took like 0:03:55.800 --> 0:04:02.080 literally fifteen. We're all positive. Um. And obviously it was 0:04:02.160 --> 0:04:05.400 the best feeling ever. I couldn't even believe what I 0:04:05.480 --> 0:04:09.520 was seeing because we just got married. Like it was 0:04:09.600 --> 0:04:12.920 like that, um, And that's never how I expected it. 0:04:13.000 --> 0:04:16.000 I always I'm like a realist, so I knew, you know, 0:04:16.040 --> 0:04:20.000 it takes time, it takes it takes a lot to 0:04:20.120 --> 0:04:24.000 go right for that to happen. Um. I obviously told 0:04:24.040 --> 0:04:26.720 Ty right away, and I was just hesitant. It's really 0:04:26.720 --> 0:04:30.080 weird now looking back, I didn't tell anyone. I was 0:04:30.200 --> 0:04:35.880 so freaked out, not because I was pregnant, but because 0:04:35.920 --> 0:04:38.839 of all the things I know. UM, and it was 0:04:38.880 --> 0:04:43.600 obviously really so I just kind of I didn't want 0:04:43.600 --> 0:04:47.320 to tell anyone. I really wanted to keep it to myself. UM. 0:04:47.400 --> 0:04:52.760 But we we ended up telling just our parents, UM 0:04:52.800 --> 0:04:57.120 a week later. And then the next day I just 0:04:57.880 --> 0:05:05.279 was off. I was in pain all day. I I 0:05:05.279 --> 0:05:07.760 I went to Google, which is the worst thing to 0:05:07.839 --> 0:05:13.520 do now. Um, I just knew something was off. And 0:05:13.560 --> 0:05:17.000 then I woke up the next morning on Easter Sunday, 0:05:17.120 --> 0:05:20.840 and when you know, you know, ladies, if you know, 0:05:21.000 --> 0:05:24.279 there was a lot of evidence that that I knew 0:05:24.320 --> 0:05:28.720 I had miscarried. So that made for a tough Easter Sunday, 0:05:28.760 --> 0:05:33.880 and it just made for a tough quarantine. UM. I mean, 0:05:33.920 --> 0:05:37.240 God blessed Hi. I even wrote in my little like journal, 0:05:37.279 --> 0:05:40.920 I've never loved him more because I don't think you're 0:05:40.960 --> 0:05:43.400 prepared for that. And I know he wasn't prepared for 0:05:43.480 --> 0:05:47.440 that with me, because I don't think I cried at 0:05:47.480 --> 0:05:52.320 the wedding. I cried for two weeks. I couldn't stop, 0:05:52.720 --> 0:05:56.919 and so from that Easter Sunday, I just for I couldn't. 0:05:57.240 --> 0:05:59.120 I didn't know what was going on. I didn't know 0:05:59.480 --> 0:06:02.279 the hormone. I didn't know what was happening with my body. 0:06:02.360 --> 0:06:04.359 I didn't know what was happening inside my body. And 0:06:04.400 --> 0:06:09.560 I just was a mess for like two weeks. And 0:06:09.640 --> 0:06:13.760 I think that, really, you know, that's something hard for 0:06:13.839 --> 0:06:15.440 him to see. He's never had to deal with me 0:06:15.520 --> 0:06:17.760 like that. Well, you're you're not a You're not a crier. 0:06:17.839 --> 0:06:20.760 I mean the first time I heard you cry ever, 0:06:21.080 --> 0:06:25.640 was when this happened. I mean you texted me like 0:06:26.279 --> 0:06:30.279 call me, and I feel awful now, but like the 0:06:30.320 --> 0:06:32.560 first thing I said is, oh my god, are you pregnant? 0:06:33.960 --> 0:06:36.280 You know, because I knew you guys were trying. And 0:06:36.320 --> 0:06:39.440 then when you said I was, I just instantly like 0:06:40.760 --> 0:06:42.719 I've just and then when I called you, and I 0:06:42.760 --> 0:06:45.719 think what broke my heart even more is like you know, 0:06:45.720 --> 0:06:49.919 you're you're bawling in rightfully, so you're so upset, and 0:06:49.960 --> 0:06:53.599 what broke my heart is because you know, from having 0:06:53.880 --> 0:06:57.360 miscarriages and feeling that same way. It broke my heart 0:06:57.360 --> 0:07:01.320 that you felt like, what is wrong with me? And 0:07:02.040 --> 0:07:05.200 it's so hard to reassure someone in that situation because 0:07:05.240 --> 0:07:08.160 Mike could tell me there's nothing wrong with me. This 0:07:08.200 --> 0:07:10.520 person could tell me it's normal, but I'm like, no, 0:07:10.800 --> 0:07:13.120 like we take it so like something is wrong with 0:07:13.160 --> 0:07:15.680 my body. I'm not a woman. And when I heard 0:07:15.720 --> 0:07:18.320 you say that, that's just like that broke me for 0:07:18.360 --> 0:07:20.960 you because I just was like I didn't know if 0:07:21.040 --> 0:07:23.160 my words were even if you could even hear it 0:07:23.200 --> 0:07:27.160 in that moment. It's just so which I'm sure it 0:07:27.320 --> 0:07:31.880 is so common, but it's like everyone can say it's 0:07:31.880 --> 0:07:33.960 not your fault, it's not your fault, but it's like 0:07:34.960 --> 0:07:38.000 if you get in a car accident, you know, and 0:07:38.080 --> 0:07:40.600 Julie's in the backseat and Julie gets hurt, even if 0:07:40.600 --> 0:07:43.280 someone hits you, you still think it's your fault because 0:07:43.320 --> 0:07:47.680 you were driving. So like that's how I spell. I 0:07:47.760 --> 0:07:49.880 literally kept saying that over and over to time because 0:07:49.880 --> 0:07:51.440 I'm like, I got to explain it to him in 0:07:51.480 --> 0:07:53.240 some way, and that's the only way I could think 0:07:53.240 --> 0:07:57.160 about it. Is like I'm driving this and it might 0:07:57.200 --> 0:07:59.800 not be my fault, but I was in charge and 0:08:00.000 --> 0:08:05.040 and I was, you know, maybe working out too much 0:08:05.120 --> 0:08:08.520 or not enough or you can go a million different ways. 0:08:08.880 --> 0:08:11.680 When I think, is that because I think when we 0:08:11.760 --> 0:08:14.640 have spoken to and you've done the same thing that 0:08:14.680 --> 0:08:16.400 you know we've all done, like you you went down 0:08:16.440 --> 0:08:22.360 the rabbit hole. Oh oh it was and still even now, 0:08:22.440 --> 0:08:26.040 and that's why it's like I didn't tell anyone, and 0:08:26.080 --> 0:08:28.360 so yeah, I'm even more anxious for this to come out, 0:08:28.400 --> 0:08:32.199 but like, how do you which I wish it was 0:08:32.320 --> 0:08:34.440 more normal and I'm hoping to make it more normal. 0:08:34.520 --> 0:08:37.520 But even like I was like, how do I tell you? 0:08:37.679 --> 0:08:39.600 And you've been through it, but it's not something you 0:08:39.640 --> 0:08:41.199 just pick up the phone and you're like, hey, how 0:08:41.240 --> 0:08:43.480 are you? Oh my god, quarantine sucks. Yeah, I know, 0:08:43.600 --> 0:08:48.600 I'm you know, conversation and that's why I'm like, I 0:08:48.720 --> 0:08:51.679 just I didn't know how to tell people or how 0:08:51.720 --> 0:08:57.400 to even bring it up, and so it just has 0:08:57.440 --> 0:09:00.800 made for a hell of a quarantine. I'm so sorry, 0:09:00.960 --> 0:09:03.800 I you know, I it's just it breaks my heart 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:09.480 and I I just I it's just it's such a 0:09:09.520 --> 0:09:11.480 such a sad situation, because I never want you to 0:09:11.520 --> 0:09:14.440 feel like, yes, I understand you're driving the car, but 0:09:14.600 --> 0:09:20.240 also there are I truly believe it's God's He's you know, 0:09:20.360 --> 0:09:26.640 he's how do I say it? Where he's still that wasn't. Yeah, 0:09:26.679 --> 0:09:29.080 there's something maybe wrong and he was saving and it 0:09:29.200 --> 0:09:31.400 just wasn't. That wasn't supposed to be. And but that 0:09:31.440 --> 0:09:33.640 doesn't make it any easier. That's a thing like I 0:09:33.760 --> 0:09:37.040 still I'm like, Okay, when people told me that, I'm like, fine, 0:09:37.160 --> 0:09:40.240 but why wasn't it? Is it? You know, I don't understand, like, 0:09:40.360 --> 0:09:43.360 and that's that's a hard realization. And that's how that 0:09:43.520 --> 0:09:46.960 was the hardest part for me, is just I think 0:09:47.040 --> 0:09:50.400 going to tie because again, and I'm sure Mike, Mike 0:09:50.440 --> 0:09:53.320 didn't really know, Like even when I told him, he 0:09:53.400 --> 0:09:55.800 was like, so what does that mean? You know? He's like, 0:09:55.800 --> 0:09:58.000 so what does that mean for you? Like, it's just 0:09:58.160 --> 0:10:03.040 a weird it's so known, but it's so unknown, and 0:10:03.080 --> 0:10:04.800 I didn't even know how to tell him, and I 0:10:04.840 --> 0:10:07.280 didn't even know how to break it to him. And 0:10:07.920 --> 0:10:11.880 I just I I think we all know that I 0:10:12.000 --> 0:10:16.400 carry the not the strength, but I keep it calm, 0:10:16.480 --> 0:10:19.360 I keep us cool. I keep it collected, and I 0:10:19.400 --> 0:10:23.000 was just a ship show. And I think that really 0:10:23.040 --> 0:10:28.520 scared him to see me so broken, but then me 0:10:28.600 --> 0:10:31.240 trying to be strong for him, and him trying to 0:10:31.280 --> 0:10:33.319 be strong for me, because I had to remind myself 0:10:33.360 --> 0:10:36.280 he lost too. It wasn't just me, you know, he 0:10:36.400 --> 0:10:39.560 was crying to he was upset because this is him too. 0:10:40.000 --> 0:10:44.560 It just feels more personal because it was in my body. 0:10:45.200 --> 0:10:47.560 I think what you said too is another good point 0:10:47.600 --> 0:10:52.199 with Okay, you here miscarriage. That's not tape. People know 0:10:52.280 --> 0:10:54.120 what that is. But then you, like you said, there's 0:10:54.640 --> 0:10:58.080 it's not just there's a miscarriage and that's it. It's 0:10:58.200 --> 0:11:01.280 you know, there's a process afterwards, depending on how far 0:11:01.320 --> 0:11:03.920 along you are, what you let it pass naturally? You're 0:11:04.000 --> 0:11:06.640 what's the procedure? We had a d n C d 0:11:06.800 --> 0:11:10.640 n C you're you know, which is almost like reliving 0:11:10.720 --> 0:11:13.640 and having to grieve all over again after you find 0:11:13.640 --> 0:11:17.680 out that you have a miscarriage. Then it's like once 0:11:17.720 --> 0:11:21.160 you physically pass it or get things medically taken care of, 0:11:21.800 --> 0:11:23.640 it's almost like the grief you starts all over again, 0:11:23.679 --> 0:11:28.760 because then it's then it's reality, you know, um, And 0:11:28.960 --> 0:11:33.520 like until that year passes. It's like, oh, this would 0:11:33.520 --> 0:11:35.240 have been my due day. This would So it's like 0:11:35.280 --> 0:11:39.839 you're constantly being reminded of that, and it's just and 0:11:40.000 --> 0:11:44.000 even I think you're so much more sensitive to it. 0:11:44.080 --> 0:11:47.600 Obvious obviously, but you know, I'm on Mother's Day, I'm thinking, oh, 0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:50.439 I would have been this much. My best friend he 0:11:50.559 --> 0:11:52.800 and his wife are do in August, and he'll send 0:11:52.800 --> 0:11:55.000 me pictures. He has no idea what's going on, but 0:11:55.040 --> 0:11:57.480 he sends me pictures because he's so excited, and it 0:11:57.559 --> 0:11:59.400 just takes Oh my god, I would have been two 0:11:59.440 --> 0:12:05.559 months behind. You know, there's just so many weird I 0:12:05.600 --> 0:12:07.840 don't know, it's so weird, and I just feel for 0:12:07.880 --> 0:12:11.880 anyone obviously who's gone through this. But the Q has 0:12:11.920 --> 0:12:16.040 made it ten times more lonely than I think it 0:12:16.040 --> 0:12:19.040 it normally is, which is also why I'm glad we're 0:12:19.040 --> 0:12:21.640 doing this, because I mean, what we've been in quarantine 0:12:21.640 --> 0:12:24.560 now how many weeks? There's got to be tons of 0:12:24.600 --> 0:12:27.120 people well, and like, you know, we saw Emma, our 0:12:27.160 --> 0:12:29.679 makeup artist, you know, she miscarried, had a d NC 0:12:29.920 --> 0:12:32.720 and and I texted her and I know that you 0:12:32.800 --> 0:12:37.720 confided in her too. Um, and I said, you sharing 0:12:37.760 --> 0:12:40.720 your story, Emma is going to help Sarah share her story, 0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:43.199 you know, and you're going to help the next person 0:12:43.240 --> 0:12:47.040 share their story because it is so lonely when you 0:12:47.080 --> 0:12:50.400 don't say anything. And the second that I feel like 0:12:50.480 --> 0:12:53.800 this does come out, the mama's out there that have 0:12:53.920 --> 0:12:56.720 experienced this are going to come and it's gonna be 0:12:56.760 --> 0:12:59.520 your new tribe of women. Because I remember when I 0:12:59.520 --> 0:13:01.640 shared it was like I felt so alone, but I'm like, 0:13:01.640 --> 0:13:04.320 I didn't want sympathy. I just didn't want to feel alone. 0:13:05.080 --> 0:13:09.319 And the second that happens and I prayed, I prayed 0:13:09.400 --> 0:13:12.040 so much that everyone's gonna come reach out to you 0:13:12.160 --> 0:13:15.240 and and you can have that tribe of women that 0:13:15.480 --> 0:13:18.320 you don't feel alone because it is so isolating, even 0:13:18.320 --> 0:13:20.520 though you have an amazing husband and Mike was amazing, 0:13:20.600 --> 0:13:24.560 but it's still just that it's you know, no one 0:13:24.559 --> 0:13:27.080 can understand unless they've been through it, I believe, you know, 0:13:27.160 --> 0:13:29.559 especially when it's a personal with your body well and 0:13:29.600 --> 0:13:32.680 even selfishly for myself, it's like, yes, I want to 0:13:32.679 --> 0:13:36.320 help people. But the first thing I did after you know, 0:13:36.440 --> 0:13:38.600 it was official, and I talked to my doctor and everything, 0:13:38.880 --> 0:13:41.240 I'm like Okay, I gotta read more story. I gotta 0:13:41.280 --> 0:13:44.520 find out who else this is? You know, who else 0:13:44.559 --> 0:13:46.600 has been through this? Who do I know who's been 0:13:46.640 --> 0:13:50.120 affected by this? Who can I learn from? And I 0:13:50.400 --> 0:13:54.360 my sister sent me these two like mommy bloggers in Dallas, 0:13:54.440 --> 0:13:58.200 and sure enough both of them had almost identical stories 0:13:58.240 --> 0:14:00.760 to me up to the weeks and it was just 0:14:00.880 --> 0:14:05.040 crazy to be able to read like, Okay, this is 0:14:05.280 --> 0:14:09.040 you know, quote unquote normal. Well, you know, I wanted 0:14:09.520 --> 0:14:12.040 because I know you have questions asked. I know you 0:14:12.120 --> 0:14:15.080 have questions that you want UM answered. And we have 0:14:15.280 --> 0:14:17.800 a doctor, um Dr Nita. She's a co host of 0:14:17.840 --> 0:14:20.280 the Emmy Award winning talk show The Doctors. She's a 0:14:20.400 --> 0:14:23.560 certified UM O B G y N. And you know, 0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:25.760 I know you just took that blood work. UM, so 0:14:25.800 --> 0:14:27.720 maybe we can just ask her some questions too, and 0:14:27.760 --> 0:14:30.040 anything else that you want to know. Yeah, so let's 0:14:30.040 --> 0:14:45.120 take a quick break and then get Dr need on. Alright, 0:14:45.240 --> 0:14:53.240 So welcome to the wind Down Podcast. Dr Nita. Hey friend, um, 0:14:53.320 --> 0:14:58.840 so Sarah Um you know and many other women out there. 0:14:59.560 --> 0:15:03.080 I'll say it again, so um Sarah Um, who's been 0:15:03.120 --> 0:15:05.160 our guest co host a lot on wine down. She 0:15:06.000 --> 0:15:08.560 recently just suffered a miscarriage, and I know a lot 0:15:08.600 --> 0:15:13.080 of women out there could really use some help, some advice. Um, 0:15:13.560 --> 0:15:15.680 Sarah has there any what what's the one thing that 0:15:15.920 --> 0:15:18.440 it has been really just heavy on your heart that 0:15:18.720 --> 0:15:24.400 maybe you want to know? Um, I feel like for me, 0:15:24.640 --> 0:15:28.440 it's um the aftermath. So I read a lot of 0:15:28.480 --> 0:15:31.000 stories and they're like, oh, I got pregnant, you know 0:15:31.080 --> 0:15:35.280 the next cycle, or oh two weeks later, I ovulated, 0:15:35.480 --> 0:15:40.440 and I know it's positivity they're trying to spread, but um, 0:15:40.480 --> 0:15:43.840 I'm over four weeks out. I haven't ovulated, I haven't 0:15:43.880 --> 0:15:48.040 had a period. So it's just kind of not what's normal, 0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:53.600 but what is what is okay? You know what is 0:15:53.960 --> 0:15:56.440 most common? Yes, I'm sure women do get pregnant two 0:15:56.480 --> 0:16:01.240 weeks after and that's made thing, But you know, for me, 0:16:02.400 --> 0:16:05.440 I don't think my body's on track yet, So kind 0:16:05.440 --> 0:16:08.840 of what's what are those next steps? Well, a lot 0:16:08.920 --> 0:16:13.320 of times it's going to depend upon number one, the 0:16:13.360 --> 0:16:17.520 woman's overall health. It's going to depend on her age 0:16:17.640 --> 0:16:21.960 and kind of the circumstances surrounding the cause for the miscarriage. 0:16:22.320 --> 0:16:27.240 But generally speaking, when will have a regular minstrual period 0:16:27.320 --> 0:16:32.320 within six weeks after having a miscarriage. And when we 0:16:32.400 --> 0:16:35.440 look at women overall, once again, the numbers will vary 0:16:35.480 --> 0:16:38.760 a little depending upon a lot of factors about that 0:16:38.840 --> 0:16:43.520 particular woman. But after one miscarriage, the risk of a 0:16:44.080 --> 0:16:49.680 miscarriage is about four After two miscarriages it goes up 0:16:49.720 --> 0:16:53.160 to six percent, and then you know, with three it's 0:16:53.200 --> 0:17:00.160 like percent um, so that's going to to vary. But 0:17:00.280 --> 0:17:03.120 they are right in that a lot of times after 0:17:03.600 --> 0:17:06.399 a woman has a miscarriage, she goes on to have 0:17:07.000 --> 0:17:11.520 a perfectly normal pregnancy next time, particularly if we're talking 0:17:11.600 --> 0:17:16.679 about someone who has just had one miscarriage. And you know, 0:17:17.160 --> 0:17:22.080 it's also important to remember that it's nothing you did. 0:17:22.680 --> 0:17:25.200 You know, a lot of times women will say, oh, 0:17:25.240 --> 0:17:28.240 I wonder if it's because I had intercourse, are oh 0:17:28.280 --> 0:17:30.560 I bought my belly, I picked up a really heavy 0:17:30.600 --> 0:17:33.959 box or something like that, And so it's important for 0:17:34.000 --> 0:17:37.720 you not to to think about those things and know 0:17:37.880 --> 0:17:42.800 that in most instances, miscarriages occurred because of problems with 0:17:42.840 --> 0:17:46.639 the chromosome, and the problems with the chromosome didn't come 0:17:46.920 --> 0:17:51.240 from mom or dad dad, meaning that those problems weren't inherited, 0:17:51.520 --> 0:17:53.879 but instead a lot of times it's just something that 0:17:53.960 --> 0:17:59.000 happens by chance when the baby is developing. Dr Nita, 0:17:59.520 --> 0:18:02.240 I have a question, and this isn't just from a 0:18:02.240 --> 0:18:07.000 god's perspective, but how soon or in the process um, 0:18:07.080 --> 0:18:08.840 when you know a couple is trying to get pregnant 0:18:08.920 --> 0:18:11.200 or woman is trying to get pregnant, should they consult 0:18:11.240 --> 0:18:13.239 their oh B because I know for Jan and I 0:18:13.320 --> 0:18:15.800 we tried a few times and it wasn't until we 0:18:15.840 --> 0:18:18.439 went and saw her obi that she we realized that 0:18:18.480 --> 0:18:21.520 she needed to get a histeroscopy just to remove some 0:18:21.600 --> 0:18:25.040 scoring you know, wasn't your your dress lining or whatever 0:18:25.040 --> 0:18:28.919 it was block and we did the HS right. So 0:18:28.960 --> 0:18:31.760 it's like, you know, at that time we look back like, 0:18:31.800 --> 0:18:35.320 oh my goodness, we wasted three months or whatever it was. 0:18:35.680 --> 0:18:39.520 Is that something where do you think couples should from 0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:41.560 the get goats, like once they decide, hey, we want 0:18:41.560 --> 0:18:43.720 to start having babies, they should do that on the 0:18:43.720 --> 0:18:48.080 forefront or just kind of let things happen how they happen. Ideally, 0:18:48.400 --> 0:18:52.960 we like to see women for preconception counseling, meaning it's 0:18:52.960 --> 0:18:55.680 a great idea to go in to see your doctor 0:18:55.760 --> 0:18:59.360 to make sure you're as healthy as possible before getting pregnant. 0:18:59.359 --> 0:19:01.720 And it's not it's not all about the pregnancy. It's 0:19:01.720 --> 0:19:03.840 also the fact that we just want you to be 0:19:03.960 --> 0:19:06.359 healthy as a woman, meaning if you come in and 0:19:06.400 --> 0:19:11.480 we diagnose you with diabetes or um thyroid disease, then 0:19:11.520 --> 0:19:14.919 we can get those issues under control so that you 0:19:14.960 --> 0:19:18.000 can be as healthy as possible going into the pregnancy. 0:19:18.119 --> 0:19:21.640 So that's what we call preconception counseling. But as far 0:19:21.800 --> 0:19:26.760 as individuals trying, you know, we say for most people, 0:19:26.880 --> 0:19:29.720 if they're younger than thirty five, you can try for 0:19:29.840 --> 0:19:32.760 a year, and the vast majority of people who have 0:19:32.840 --> 0:19:36.200 regular intercourse and they're not using any type of contraception 0:19:36.240 --> 0:19:40.560 will get pregnant within that year. UM. For older individuals 0:19:40.560 --> 0:19:45.120 are people with specific medical issues, we may say six months. UM, 0:19:45.160 --> 0:19:48.600 so we may we shortened that time period. But to 0:19:48.640 --> 0:19:51.639 answer your question, if it depends on how long you 0:19:51.680 --> 0:19:54.760 are trying, If you know both of you are healthy 0:19:54.800 --> 0:19:58.320 individuals and you just have been trying for three months, 0:19:58.680 --> 0:20:01.160 do I think that you made mistake by not going 0:20:01.240 --> 0:20:03.679 in initially just to say, you know, we want to 0:20:03.680 --> 0:20:06.600 get pregnant. Do I need to look at at her 0:20:06.680 --> 0:20:09.400 tubes or anything like that. No, I don't think that 0:20:09.560 --> 0:20:13.040 was warranted. But once again, with the preconcession, is it 0:20:13.520 --> 0:20:16.200 the doctor will just kind of go over the females 0:20:16.320 --> 0:20:20.400 overall help and I didn't any potential issues that could 0:20:20.440 --> 0:20:23.600 cause a problem in the pregnancy and remind her to 0:20:23.600 --> 0:20:26.680 take her prenatal elements with both guests for sure. Um, 0:20:26.720 --> 0:20:30.919 you know, I'm curious too because um a family member 0:20:30.920 --> 0:20:34.159 of ours she just had her third miscarriage and on 0:20:34.240 --> 0:20:36.960 her first one, I said, hey, you know, you should 0:20:36.960 --> 0:20:40.640 really go to your doctor and you know, see why, 0:20:40.680 --> 0:20:42.520 and she's like, well, I called and they just said, oh, 0:20:42.560 --> 0:20:45.919 it's common, like you know, just just try again. But 0:20:46.040 --> 0:20:48.119 now she's on our third and in my mind, I'm like, 0:20:48.960 --> 0:20:51.440 you know, I get that it's common. I get that, 0:20:52.440 --> 0:20:54.919 you know, chromosome only there could be something wrong, But 0:20:55.000 --> 0:20:58.119 now that she's suffered her third miscarriage, it's kind of 0:20:58.160 --> 0:21:02.080 like she's in so much pain again for the third time. 0:21:02.240 --> 0:21:04.879 I feel like that could have been avoided if the 0:21:04.920 --> 0:21:09.320 gynecologist was like not just blew off, like, oh, miscarriage 0:21:09.359 --> 0:21:12.560 is common, and not done the proper blood work and 0:21:12.560 --> 0:21:15.240 everything else that she's you know, taking them finding out 0:21:15.280 --> 0:21:18.560 the gene that mt hr or whatever it was, we 0:21:18.640 --> 0:21:20.879 had them. So I'm like, is that is that pretty 0:21:20.920 --> 0:21:23.959 common for a guy? No, to say like one, like 0:21:24.119 --> 0:21:27.119 come back if you have another one, or well, I 0:21:27.160 --> 0:21:30.320 think a couple of things there. It is common for 0:21:30.840 --> 0:21:34.280 gynecologists are obstitutions to say come back if you just 0:21:34.359 --> 0:21:37.520 had one. But even though it's a common experience, that 0:21:37.640 --> 0:21:41.200 doesn't make it easier. So as a physician, I would 0:21:41.200 --> 0:21:43.360 never want to say, oh, it's fine, it's common, don't 0:21:43.400 --> 0:21:46.560 worry about it. Like once you have a positive pregnancy test, 0:21:46.600 --> 0:21:49.199 you're a mother, you know, and you love your baby, 0:21:49.560 --> 0:21:52.040 And so I think it's important to make sure that 0:21:52.520 --> 0:21:56.240 we do whatever we can to support a couple of 0:21:56.600 --> 0:21:58.760 you know, the woman physically, and then make sure the 0:21:58.800 --> 0:22:02.520 couple has the emotional support needed. But the second part 0:22:02.520 --> 0:22:05.280 of that is just the workup in general, because a 0:22:05.280 --> 0:22:08.399 lot of females will go on to have perfectly normal 0:22:08.440 --> 0:22:12.280 pregnancies after having one miscarriage simply because a lot of 0:22:12.320 --> 0:22:16.000 those happened due to what we previously discussed, meaning it's 0:22:16.040 --> 0:22:19.520 just the chromosomal abnormalities that happen to have happen in 0:22:19.560 --> 0:22:23.879 that particular pregnancy, we won't subject them to a huge 0:22:23.960 --> 0:22:26.880 work up, meaning we won't run all the blood tests 0:22:26.880 --> 0:22:28.879 and do a ton of imaging and all of those 0:22:28.920 --> 0:22:32.359 other things after one. Now, when we talk about a 0:22:32.440 --> 0:22:36.400 female who's had two consecutive miscarriages, are some people will 0:22:36.440 --> 0:22:40.000 say three it's a little debatable. But after two consecutive 0:22:40.040 --> 0:22:43.560 miscarriages are three, then we start to do a bigger 0:22:43.600 --> 0:22:46.399 work up to see if there is an underlying issue 0:22:46.880 --> 0:22:51.320 that is increasing that woman's probability of having miscarriages. Meaning 0:22:51.640 --> 0:22:55.280 we can no longer say, oh, it's probably probably just uh, 0:22:55.520 --> 0:22:59.200 chromosomal abnormality that happened by chance. Instead we're saying, okay, 0:22:59.240 --> 0:23:02.080 if it is a chromosomal abnormality, is it a chromosomal 0:23:02.080 --> 0:23:05.359 abnormality that's being inherited by from the parents, Meaning do 0:23:05.440 --> 0:23:07.679 we need to test the parents or is it some 0:23:07.800 --> 0:23:12.480 type of um thrombophilia or something else going on some 0:23:12.600 --> 0:23:16.040 deeper underlying issues. So that's why her doctor waited. But 0:23:16.160 --> 0:23:19.000 at the same time, once again, I do understand that 0:23:19.040 --> 0:23:21.840 even though it's common, it doesn't make it easier, and 0:23:21.880 --> 0:23:26.440 I definitely don't want patients to feel as so health 0:23:26.480 --> 0:23:30.880 care providers are brushing it off. It's still very important 0:23:31.160 --> 0:23:34.600 in a couple's life for sure, if you had just 0:23:34.720 --> 0:23:38.159 to be current with the times right now, so you 0:23:38.200 --> 0:23:40.639 had a couple that consulted with you right now. So 0:23:40.880 --> 0:23:43.919 Dr Neta, we're thinking about trying to have a baby 0:23:44.920 --> 0:23:48.240 amidst the quarantine, amidst the pandemic and all of that stuff. 0:23:49.440 --> 0:23:55.879 From your professional perspective, would you steer a couple or 0:23:56.040 --> 0:24:00.359 give your opinion on a couple trying to conceive it now, 0:24:00.400 --> 0:24:04.080 just because we don't know what's gonna happen with the pandemic. 0:24:04.119 --> 0:24:05.639 We don't know if there's gonna be another spike in 0:24:05.640 --> 0:24:09.240