WEBVTT - Haters Gonna Hate with Gretchen Rossi and Slade Smiley 0:00:13.840 --> 0:00:17.320 Hey, there are folks, and welcome to I Do Part two. 0:00:17.840 --> 0:00:20.520 And if you got lucky in love the first time around, 0:00:20.600 --> 0:00:24.480 this ain't the show for you. I'm CJ. Holme alongside 0:00:24.520 --> 0:00:28.200 my partner Amy Robot and Roll. It's difficult. Relationship is 0:00:28.200 --> 0:00:30.520 difficult enough, but you have to go through all that 0:00:30.840 --> 0:00:35.480 scrutiny and tabloids and constantly being scrutinized for your relationship. 0:00:35.520 --> 0:00:36.520 I can't imagine. 0:00:36.640 --> 0:00:37.000 What's that? 0:00:37.200 --> 0:00:40.280 Like? What like? I wouldn't wish that on anyone. 0:00:40.360 --> 0:00:43.879 I wouldn't But our guest today they've been dealing with 0:00:43.960 --> 0:00:47.440 it for a while, for years, for decade plus. 0:00:47.720 --> 0:00:50.199 Yeah, and they went away for a while, probably to 0:00:50.280 --> 0:00:53.479 lick their wounds and to just enjoy some peace and quiet. 0:00:53.880 --> 0:00:57.720 But guess what, somehow, some way, they're back for more, 0:00:58.320 --> 0:01:02.000 and we need to ask them why, among many other 0:01:02.120 --> 0:01:05.040 questions we have for our next two guests, but we 0:01:05.080 --> 0:01:07.959 are very excited to have from the Real Housewives of 0:01:08.160 --> 0:01:13.440 OC Gretchen Rossi and Slades Smiley Slades and og on 0:01:13.520 --> 0:01:16.600 the OC and both of them are back for more. 0:01:16.680 --> 0:01:18.280 So welcome. How y'all doing. 0:01:18.840 --> 0:01:20.280 Hi guys, Nice to see you. 0:01:20.560 --> 0:01:22.280 Yeah, great to see you. There's a lot there. She 0:01:22.319 --> 0:01:23.480 packed a lot in the door. I know. 0:01:23.800 --> 0:01:27.080 I know. You guys ask the question like what are 0:01:27.080 --> 0:01:27.520 we thinking? 0:01:27.560 --> 0:01:30.560 And we're still asking ourselves what are we thinking? 0:01:31.720 --> 0:01:33.880 So what answer have you come up with so far? 0:01:34.000 --> 0:01:36.240 Why would you put yourself back out there? 0:01:36.520 --> 0:01:40.399 There is absolutely no good answer whatsoever. Yeah, NOx, you 0:01:40.520 --> 0:01:41.160 have to tell us. 0:01:41.440 --> 0:01:43.760 How did it come about? Did they approach you? All 0:01:44.040 --> 0:01:46.560 conversations were happening, you got back in the friend group. 0:01:46.720 --> 0:01:49.760 How did it come about that you all after eleven years? 0:01:49.760 --> 0:01:51.920 I think it was being away from the show end 0:01:52.000 --> 0:01:52.560 up back on it. 0:01:53.480 --> 0:01:53.680 You know. 0:01:54.000 --> 0:01:57.520 I feel like there's always been rumblings and talks and 0:01:57.560 --> 0:02:00.240 always kind of like checking in with us and what 0:02:00.280 --> 0:02:02.760 our interest is. And for a long time it was 0:02:02.800 --> 0:02:05.800 an absolute no, you know, like no interest. We definitely 0:02:05.840 --> 0:02:10.120 needed that break. We got scrutinized a lot. But then 0:02:10.639 --> 0:02:16.320 this round they called and approached us. And when they called, 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:19.880 I just said I really I actually said no. 0:02:20.360 --> 0:02:23.440 And then he's like, well, let's just think about it. 0:02:23.520 --> 0:02:26.720 How about don't say no, just think about it, and 0:02:26.800 --> 0:02:29.560 then the executives are going to be in town, so 0:02:29.760 --> 0:02:31.880 just meet with the executives when they're in town. 0:02:31.880 --> 0:02:32.960 And I said, I'll think about it. 0:02:33.400 --> 0:02:35.959 So then he was texting and saying, you know, they're 0:02:35.960 --> 0:02:37.480 coming to town, can we schedule it? 0:02:37.520 --> 0:02:38.160 So finally I. 0:02:38.120 --> 0:02:41.600 Agreed to it, and then I honestly said no three times, 0:02:41.720 --> 0:02:44.679 like they kept making offers and I said no, no, no, 0:02:45.280 --> 0:02:48.919 and then finally they ended up making an offer that 0:02:49.000 --> 0:02:52.000 we couldn't refuse and we felt good about. And yeah, 0:02:52.040 --> 0:02:54.520 that's why we decided to finally say yes. I mean, 0:02:54.560 --> 0:02:55.320 that's the honest truth. 0:02:56.000 --> 0:02:58.560 But there's more too than that. Obviously, you know, she 0:02:58.600 --> 0:03:00.400 had an opportunity to go back and do you Ultimate 0:03:00.440 --> 0:03:00.959 Girl's Trip. 0:03:01.120 --> 0:03:03.640 Yes, I did do that, so you know that was fine. 0:03:03.680 --> 0:03:06.560 We were back working with them. There's other projects that 0:03:06.600 --> 0:03:11.240 we had in process with them, and so you know, 0:03:11.280 --> 0:03:13.639 the original request to come back to Housewives full time 0:03:13.720 --> 0:03:15.919 is not just that simple, right, because there's other things 0:03:15.960 --> 0:03:18.520 that are happening, other projects in development. So you know, 0:03:18.560 --> 0:03:21.000 it wasn't because we just had no desire to be 0:03:21.040 --> 0:03:23.200 involved with with Housewives, but it was because there were 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:25.800 so many other things going on. So you know, I 0:03:25.840 --> 0:03:29.040 think over the course of several months and in those negotiations, 0:03:29.320 --> 0:03:32.440 Gretcha was able to talk through everything. And I said 0:03:32.440 --> 0:03:34.240 to her when she finally decided to go back that 0:03:34.320 --> 0:03:37.160 if there was a season to go back, this is 0:03:37.200 --> 0:03:40.760 probably the right season. She's got long standing relationships with 0:03:40.920 --> 0:03:42.880 a lot of the women, some of them are newer, 0:03:43.240 --> 0:03:45.240 but she's become close friends and so there's a lot 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:47.680 of authenticity there, just with either whether it be history 0:03:47.760 --> 0:03:50.520 or with that new friendship. And so this this was 0:03:50.560 --> 0:03:51.800 the season. I think it made sense. 0:03:52.040 --> 0:03:55.040 Yeah, well, there are also long standing rivalries that are 0:03:55.080 --> 0:03:59.040 now back in play, and it's we watched for the 0:03:59.120 --> 0:04:02.840 drama and there's no shortage of that. We've been catching 0:04:02.920 --> 0:04:06.000 up on this season already. So you made the decision, 0:04:06.080 --> 0:04:10.160 you said, yes, you're back. Are you glad you made 0:04:10.160 --> 0:04:12.320 that decision? Now that you're in the think of it 0:04:12.360 --> 0:04:17.760 and we're starting to watch these episodes start to showcase, well, 0:04:18.080 --> 0:04:19.960 I don't know. I mean short of drama. I mean 0:04:19.960 --> 0:04:23.120 there's so much drama, and there's so much surrounding you 0:04:23.240 --> 0:04:27.960 and camera so worse. How are you it gets worse? So, 0:04:28.040 --> 0:04:30.200 I mean, how does that feel to put yourself back 0:04:30.240 --> 0:04:34.560 in the boxing rings, so to speak, on public display? 0:04:34.600 --> 0:04:38.040 You know, I think for me, I've never been afraid 0:04:38.480 --> 0:04:41.000 to come on the show and share my life and 0:04:41.040 --> 0:04:44.000 share my truth and share who I am. I think 0:04:44.040 --> 0:04:47.159 what makes it really difficult is when people are willing 0:04:47.200 --> 0:04:51.000 to say and do anything and make up lies about 0:04:51.040 --> 0:04:51.840 you and your life. 0:04:52.040 --> 0:04:57.160 And sometimes, you know, that part of. 0:04:57.120 --> 0:04:59.480 It is really difficult, and that part of it I 0:04:59.520 --> 0:05:02.600 absolutely hate. And you know, you know how they say 0:05:02.640 --> 0:05:05.279 like in lawsuits, anybody can file a lawsuit and say 0:05:05.320 --> 0:05:08.120 anything they want, you know, and then the world automatically 0:05:08.120 --> 0:05:11.000 believes it. And so that's the part of this narrative 0:05:11.040 --> 0:05:16.080 that's very difficult is when especially a you know, nemesis 0:05:16.080 --> 0:05:18.160 of yours for so many years, has proven to be 0:05:18.279 --> 0:05:20.640 that person where they love to make up lies and 0:05:20.720 --> 0:05:25.279 love to make up things about you. It just that 0:05:25.400 --> 0:05:28.080 part of it's hard. And I really really enjoyed the 0:05:28.120 --> 0:05:30.919 season so much. I had such a great relationship with 0:05:30.960 --> 0:05:32.760 so many of the girls on the show. As a 0:05:32.839 --> 0:05:34.920 matter of fact, it was the most fun I've had 0:05:34.960 --> 0:05:38.479 filming that I can remember. Like, I mean, I definitely 0:05:38.480 --> 0:05:40.520 had some fun times back when I was filming, but 0:05:40.560 --> 0:05:43.200 this was the first time being back with this group where. 0:05:43.000 --> 0:05:45.440 It was a different group. It was a different dynamic. 0:05:46.320 --> 0:05:48.080 It wasn't a lot of the same old like we 0:05:48.160 --> 0:05:51.080 had new you know stuff, going on. Obviously, some of 0:05:51.120 --> 0:05:53.440 the past is gonna get brought up because tamer and 0:05:53.480 --> 0:05:55.520 I had a lot of stuff that we had to 0:05:56.160 --> 0:05:56.799 work through. 0:05:57.360 --> 0:06:00.280 But well, you said something to me was very interesting. 0:06:00.279 --> 0:06:02.640 She's like, I may have disagreements with the other girls, 0:06:02.680 --> 0:06:05.080 and yes there's conflicts and fights, but I feel like 0:06:05.120 --> 0:06:06.240 I'm fighting with my sister. 0:06:06.400 --> 0:06:06.679 Yeah. 0:06:06.800 --> 0:06:09.600 Right, we can agree to disagree and everyone can kind 0:06:09.600 --> 0:06:12.320 of move on and there's no fracture in really the 0:06:12.360 --> 0:06:15.200 friendship of the relationship. It's just when people try to 0:06:15.240 --> 0:06:17.760 go too far. But for the most part, you know, 0:06:18.400 --> 0:06:21.200 being a witness of her coming back and having experience 0:06:21.240 --> 0:06:22.840 what she did, I mean, I think for the most part, 0:06:22.880 --> 0:06:24.120 as you said, you had a really. 0:06:23.960 --> 0:06:27.720 Good time you did, there was lots of less Sorry 0:06:27.920 --> 0:06:31.400 I just heard you say worked through. So you and 0:06:31.440 --> 0:06:34.880 Tamra work through some things in the season. It sounded 0:06:34.920 --> 0:06:35.760 like it was positive. 0:06:35.839 --> 0:06:38.640 Well, no, what I meant was there was a lot 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:40.799 that we needed to work through. 0:06:41.760 --> 0:06:46.359 But somebody obviously doesn't want to go back and address 0:06:46.400 --> 0:06:49.320 a lot of those things in the past because my belief, 0:06:49.360 --> 0:06:52.720 in my opinion, it reminds people of who she is 0:06:52.760 --> 0:06:54.960 and the things that she's done. The thing that I 0:06:55.040 --> 0:06:57.880 find ironic is she's running around telling the press and 0:06:57.920 --> 0:07:01.400 telling everyone, Oh, Grutchen's stuck in the past, but yet 0:07:01.480 --> 0:07:05.960 she's literally going to therapy to discuss her past and 0:07:06.000 --> 0:07:09.400 the things that have caused trauma and pain to her. 0:07:09.680 --> 0:07:12.760 So why is it okay she uses for her behavior, right? 0:07:12.840 --> 0:07:15.000 But why is it okay that she gets to go 0:07:15.160 --> 0:07:17.800 and address her past and go talk through that, but 0:07:17.960 --> 0:07:19.280 I'm not allowed to do that. 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:21.360 It feels very hypocritical to me. 0:07:22.360 --> 0:07:26.480 Okay, this doesn't feel to me at least. Guys manufactured. 0:07:26.560 --> 0:07:29.680 We talk to a lot of reality TV folks over 0:07:29.680 --> 0:07:32.440 the years and sometimes they'll flat out tell us, yeah, 0:07:32.480 --> 0:07:34.360 we need a villain they had to have bring back. 0:07:34.440 --> 0:07:37.080 So it's almost manufactured. And that's part of playing to 0:07:37.120 --> 0:07:41.760 the camera. YouTube. Sound like this is real? YouTube? Sound 0:07:41.840 --> 0:07:44.120 like you have some real issues and thinks she has 0:07:44.200 --> 0:07:48.160 some real issues. Is this really beyond repair? 0:07:48.880 --> 0:07:49.120 You know? 0:07:50.040 --> 0:07:52.640 Here's the thing for me, I always say it's never 0:07:52.840 --> 0:07:57.000 beyond repair. But I do think that in life there's 0:07:57.160 --> 0:08:00.480 a thing called accountability, and I think that in order 0:08:00.520 --> 0:08:03.320 for things to be repaired, both parties have to be 0:08:03.400 --> 0:08:06.840 willing to take accountability for the pain and the hurt. 0:08:06.960 --> 0:08:09.000 And the struggles that they have caused somebody. 0:08:09.400 --> 0:08:12.400 And it's not just so like yeah, yeah, okay, I'm sorry, 0:08:12.480 --> 0:08:14.840 let's move on because they just want to get done 0:08:14.840 --> 0:08:17.400 with it. It's like to really feel hurd and to 0:08:17.520 --> 0:08:21.520 really feel you know, recognized of the pain that you 0:08:21.760 --> 0:08:22.280 went through. 0:08:22.600 --> 0:08:23.520 It takes more than that. 0:08:23.760 --> 0:08:26.080 So that's what I was looking for from her, And 0:08:26.480 --> 0:08:28.800 did I ultimately get that. You're gonna have to tune 0:08:28.840 --> 0:08:30.120 in and see. 0:08:31.440 --> 0:08:34.760 All of the negativity and the comments and some of 0:08:34.800 --> 0:08:36.840 the things that have been written about you both in 0:08:36.880 --> 0:08:40.720 the press with this new season. At any point, has 0:08:40.760 --> 0:08:44.920 it affected your relationship? Has it seeped into your relationship 0:08:44.960 --> 0:08:47.640 with one another when you're being attacked like that. 0:08:48.120 --> 0:08:49.000 I wouldn't say. 0:08:49.240 --> 0:08:51.440 Like, the thing that Slad and I always talk about 0:08:51.559 --> 0:08:58.800 is that there's definitely times where the noise is it's 0:08:58.840 --> 0:09:01.080 a struggle no matter what, and anyone that says it's 0:09:01.120 --> 0:09:04.320 not is probably lying to you. It's always going to 0:09:04.400 --> 0:09:07.240 affect you because you know, nobody wants to hear something 0:09:07.280 --> 0:09:11.040 negative about your relationship. If anybody knows you two know that, right, 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:16.280 It's like it's difficult, especially especially when your heart is 0:09:16.320 --> 0:09:18.360 with that person and you love that person. Hearing that 0:09:18.480 --> 0:09:21.760 negative feedback is very hard. But at the end of 0:09:21.800 --> 0:09:24.080 the day, the thing about Slayton and I is that 0:09:24.200 --> 0:09:26.720 we are so we have such a strong foundation and 0:09:26.760 --> 0:09:30.040 we love each other so much that there's nothing out 0:09:30.080 --> 0:09:31.920 there that's going to be said that will break us 0:09:31.960 --> 0:09:35.080 because it's the noise, it's their opinion, it's not what 0:09:35.240 --> 0:09:37.679 him and I know about each other and what we 0:09:37.720 --> 0:09:40.240 love about each other. And so we when we always 0:09:40.240 --> 0:09:43.760 come back to that foundation and we remember why we 0:09:43.800 --> 0:09:45.920 love each other, not because of what everyone else is 0:09:45.960 --> 0:09:48.560 telling us, I feel like that's what's kept us together 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:49.520 for sixteen years. 0:09:49.800 --> 0:09:52.920 Yeah, And and so you're it's not that we don't 0:09:53.040 --> 0:09:56.040 have conflict, or it's not that we don't fight, because 0:09:56.040 --> 0:10:00.960 we do, but that conflict almost always stems from outside source. 0:10:01.520 --> 0:10:03.959 And it may be the fact that I'm super affected 0:10:04.000 --> 0:10:05.840 by something that was said about me and I'm angry 0:10:05.840 --> 0:10:08.640 about it, and she wants me to shut up and 0:10:08.800 --> 0:10:11.559 reminds me why maybe making that common isn't the best 0:10:11.600 --> 0:10:16.040 decision for you. So it really it's conflict in that 0:10:16.080 --> 0:10:18.360 way where we try to just bring each other back 0:10:18.400 --> 0:10:22.360 to center and just remind ourselves of the space we're 0:10:22.400 --> 0:10:26.200 in we know the truth, but that's really what it is, 0:10:26.200 --> 0:10:28.440 because we do. And I get upset too because I 0:10:28.480 --> 0:10:31.199 see her being affected by something someone has said, right, 0:10:31.240 --> 0:10:33.640 and it upsets her and she's sad and she's angry 0:10:33.679 --> 0:10:36.360 about it, and that makes me mad someone attacking my spouse. 0:10:36.840 --> 0:10:40.600 So you know, it's almost always, I can say this, truly, 0:10:40.679 --> 0:10:44.960 almost always major conflict in our relationship has come from 0:10:45.000 --> 0:10:51.480 outside sources or outside circumstances, any conflict that we've ever 0:10:51.559 --> 0:10:54.200 had in our relationship internally. And I give her mad 0:10:54.280 --> 0:10:56.560 props for this is that we can have an agreement. 0:10:56.960 --> 0:11:00.000 We can either resolve or agree to disagree. But when 0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:02.840 it's solved, it's solved. She has never once since sixteen 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:05.120 years ago. And you remember that time or you said 0:11:05.160 --> 0:11:07.840 that nothing ever comes back from the past. When it 0:11:07.920 --> 0:11:10.280 is done, it is done. We're smiling and we're going 0:11:10.320 --> 0:11:11.480 to lunch fifteen minutes later. 0:11:21.720 --> 0:11:23.800 You know what was your last fight? You guys, remember 0:11:23.840 --> 0:11:25.880 what was the last thing you two fight about? Thought about? 0:11:25.920 --> 0:11:26.680 Ice cream? 0:11:27.760 --> 0:11:29.719 It was ice cream, wasn't it. As you said, I 0:11:29.880 --> 0:11:30.720 ate the last drumstick. 0:11:30.840 --> 0:11:32.920 Yes, I was very upset that he ate the last drug? 0:11:33.240 --> 0:11:33.440 Was that? 0:11:33.920 --> 0:11:36.400 Like I just one of the whole box. 0:11:36.480 --> 0:11:38.760 I want a one drumstick, and I couldn't even get 0:11:38.840 --> 0:11:39.559 one drumstick. 0:11:39.679 --> 0:11:42.079 Our biggest fights have been I spilled orange juice on 0:11:42.120 --> 0:11:44.280 a new purse. Yep, right brand. 0:11:44.559 --> 0:11:45.120 We've done that. 0:11:45.360 --> 0:11:46.200 She almost divorced. 0:11:49.000 --> 0:11:51.360 Yeah, no, that's silly fights. 0:11:51.480 --> 0:11:54.199 Yeah. Is that a good sign every relationship? Everybody in 0:11:54.200 --> 0:11:56.199 your relationship? I would love to answer that question. Is 0:11:56.240 --> 0:11:58.840 it a good sign that you fight over petty stuff? 0:11:59.559 --> 0:12:01.880 Or is it bad sign that you fight over small stuff? 0:12:01.920 --> 0:12:03.560 Like it doesn't mean you don't have big stuff to 0:12:03.559 --> 0:12:04.079 fight about. 0:12:05.000 --> 0:12:08.360 Well, you know, I mean, listen again, big stuff again. 0:12:08.440 --> 0:12:09.720 There's there's always. 0:12:11.000 --> 0:12:11.360 In life. 0:12:11.400 --> 0:12:15.679 There's always big stuff. But I guess to us, like. 0:12:14.840 --> 0:12:18.040 Like, it's never been so big that it has caused 0:12:18.200 --> 0:12:22.479 a wedge in our relationship or a fracture in the relationship. 0:12:22.559 --> 0:12:24.600 So I guess to us, it doesn't feel like it 0:12:24.640 --> 0:12:26.240 was that big because it's never. 0:12:26.120 --> 0:12:30.360 Really led to something. You know, Yeah, more intense between us. 0:12:30.360 --> 0:12:31.880 But let me let me tell you one thing that 0:12:31.960 --> 0:12:35.000 my my lovely wife did. Two things. The first was 0:12:36.240 --> 0:12:39.640 she has a degree in psychology. She failed to disclose 0:12:39.640 --> 0:12:43.600 that when we first started dating. There's non disclosure. She's 0:12:43.600 --> 0:12:45.840 smarter than me, and she knows what's up. She catches everything. 0:12:46.720 --> 0:12:48.680 The other thing she forced me to do, and you 0:12:48.720 --> 0:12:50.840 can relate to this, is that when when men typically 0:12:50.840 --> 0:12:53.080 get upset about something of this conflict, what do we do? 0:12:53.360 --> 0:12:55.920 We shut down, we want to marinate, I want to 0:12:55.960 --> 0:12:58.840 think about it. Right. She has been adamant in our 0:12:58.880 --> 0:13:02.760 relationship that she makes me discuss things now and it 0:13:02.880 --> 0:13:08.480 drives me nuts. What I've learned, this is for your audience. 0:13:08.520 --> 0:13:11.080 Here's what I learned, and this is the best analogy ever, 0:13:11.800 --> 0:13:15.360 is that when you get a splinter, it's best to 0:13:15.400 --> 0:13:18.640 pull out the splinter and you find it wasn't that bad. 0:13:18.800 --> 0:13:22.520 When you don't pull it out, that splinter gets infected, right, 0:13:22.640 --> 0:13:25.120 and that infection can get very serious, to the point 0:13:25.120 --> 0:13:27.520 where you end up in the hospital. And what do 0:13:27.520 --> 0:13:30.200 you do. They want to amputate, they want to end 0:13:30.200 --> 0:13:30.839 the relationship. 0:13:30.880 --> 0:13:33.200 Thank you, thank you for saying this, because we have 0:13:33.240 --> 0:13:34.119 the same issue. 0:13:34.320 --> 0:13:39.760 But I just embraced and it has been a thousand 0:13:39.800 --> 0:13:42.320 times better because at the end of the day, the 0:13:42.360 --> 0:13:45.520 conflict comes typically from a misunderstanding, and it was never 0:13:45.559 --> 0:13:48.000 as bad as I thought it was. The problem is 0:13:48.080 --> 0:13:50.400 that when I go off and marinate. Right, and I 0:13:50.679 --> 0:13:53.600 start spinning about things that aren't really so many and 0:13:53.800 --> 0:13:55.559 I may say something I regret. 0:13:56.640 --> 0:13:57.559 I'm so guilty. 0:13:58.679 --> 0:14:02.160 It's a male characteristic. I'm telling it. 0:14:02.760 --> 0:14:04.840 And you get into your head and you create this narrative, 0:14:04.840 --> 0:14:07.440 and then your enemies and all these things just build up. 0:14:07.760 --> 0:14:09.560 You say things you didn't want to say. It's almost 0:14:09.559 --> 0:14:12.880 like when you've been wronged in some capacity and you 0:14:12.960 --> 0:14:15.679 want to send that skating email. You want to fire back, 0:14:15.720 --> 0:14:18.880 and then they go, just sit on it today, just 0:14:18.960 --> 0:14:21.480 wait a second, think through it then, and like, you know, 0:14:22.000 --> 0:14:25.760 be more intentful in your response to things. So this guy, 0:14:25.960 --> 0:14:28.440 he's like, why do we choose these to see? 0:14:28.520 --> 0:14:31.600 I'm still back on your splinter, right, I need to 0:14:31.640 --> 0:14:34.560 go exit. I need to examine the splinter and see 0:14:34.560 --> 0:14:36.640 how severe it is. And do I need to get 0:14:36.680 --> 0:14:38.520 tweezers to pull it out? Can I just pull it 0:14:38.560 --> 0:14:40.600 out with my hand? Is it that bad? How deep? 0:14:40.800 --> 0:14:41.000 You know? 0:14:41.080 --> 0:14:43.400 I want to look at this for a little while, guys, 0:14:43.440 --> 0:14:46.240 and not just that's hilarious. 0:14:46.480 --> 0:14:51.320 It's always just tweezers, dude, It's just a pair of tweezers. 0:14:51.760 --> 0:14:53.560 You don't get it with the Tweezers to begin. 0:14:53.440 --> 0:14:58.280 With Slade, I heard you refer to Gretchen as your 0:14:58.360 --> 0:14:59.640 lovely wife on more. 0:14:59.560 --> 0:15:02.480 Than one and today this moment. 0:15:02.400 --> 0:15:05.360 Yes, I will say I love the montage that they did. 0:15:05.400 --> 0:15:08.720 I think it was episode one this season where all 0:15:08.880 --> 0:15:11.560 the people, all the doubters who thought y'all were just 0:15:11.600 --> 0:15:13.600 putting on a spectacle and putting on a show and 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:16.440 playing to the cameras with your engagement. They all thought 0:15:16.480 --> 0:15:18.760 you were doomed and full of it. Well, it was 0:15:18.800 --> 0:15:20.640 like three or four of them all. They just kind 0:15:20.640 --> 0:15:22.960 of showed the divorces that have all happened from all 0:15:23.000 --> 0:15:26.000 of those women who were doubting you and doubting the 0:15:26.080 --> 0:15:29.560 reality of your relationship. So you haven't officially or technically 0:15:29.600 --> 0:15:32.840 gotten married, but you've been together and we're watching you 0:15:32.880 --> 0:15:37.040 too now sixteen years into it. It's very impressive. Why 0:15:37.120 --> 0:15:38.160 haven't you gotten married? 0:15:38.360 --> 0:15:41.720 Gosh, how do we answer that? It's a little complicated? 0:15:41.760 --> 0:15:41.840 That? 0:15:41.920 --> 0:15:44.640 Well, it is and it isn't. There was definitely the 0:15:44.640 --> 0:15:48.680 intense We even had a date on calendar originally the engagement, 0:15:49.000 --> 0:15:51.080 and I think we even announced that date on an 0:15:51.080 --> 0:15:54.160 episode of Watch What Happens Live. But it turned out 0:15:54.160 --> 0:15:57.040 that that date, A ended up falling on a holiday 0:15:57.040 --> 0:16:00.280 that was in conflict with some family members, and I 0:16:00.400 --> 0:16:04.360 ended up booking a mini series with History Channel, and 0:16:04.440 --> 0:16:08.320 so I spent almost a month in Durango, Mexico filming 0:16:10.480 --> 0:16:14.120 on that project. So we really postponed, and then when 0:16:14.120 --> 0:16:17.200 we came back, we had conversations around also wanting to 0:16:17.240 --> 0:16:19.960 start a family and have a baby, and we kind 0:16:19.960 --> 0:16:21.680 of went, well, do we spend the money on IVF 0:16:21.720 --> 0:16:23.160 do we spend it on a big wedding? And we went, 0:16:23.160 --> 0:16:26.360 you know what time is of the essence? You are geriatric? Yeah, 0:16:26.400 --> 0:16:28.760 I say, called me Jerry to have a baby yet 0:16:29.040 --> 0:16:30.880 time for her age. So we just thought we'd put 0:16:30.920 --> 0:16:34.520 the resources into having Skylar Gray and that has been 0:16:35.040 --> 0:16:36.840 the biggest blessing in our life, right. 0:16:36.760 --> 0:16:39.400 Yeah, And it was. And you know, after I had 0:16:39.440 --> 0:16:41.560 the baby, I had a lot of postpartum depression. I 0:16:41.880 --> 0:16:45.280 was what, I felt overweight still, And so it wasn't 0:16:45.400 --> 0:16:47.400 until like just this year that him. 0:16:47.280 --> 0:16:48.680 And I started talking about again. 0:16:48.760 --> 0:16:50.720 We're like, Okay, I feel like now it would be 0:16:50.720 --> 0:16:53.600 a good time to like go finally get married. 0:16:53.680 --> 0:16:54.400 But here's the thing. 0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:57.240 We call each other husband and wife because we have 0:16:57.320 --> 0:16:58.680 been together for sixteen years. 0:16:58.720 --> 0:16:59.880 We have a daughter together. 0:17:00.360 --> 0:17:04.200 Everyone views us as if we are married, because we 0:17:04.240 --> 0:17:06.840 live our lives as if we're married. So for us, 0:17:06.880 --> 0:17:09.520 it's not We don't even think of it that we're 0:17:09.520 --> 0:17:09.960 not married. 0:17:10.000 --> 0:17:11.200 We are, you know what I mean? 0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:17.040 In Texas we would be right technically from a law 0:17:17.040 --> 0:17:19.320 of state. But yeah, half and half the country I 0:17:19.320 --> 0:17:19.800 think we are. 0:17:21.280 --> 0:17:23.760 Does does Skuyler? Does that ever come up with her? 0:17:23.840 --> 0:17:25.600 Does she care? One way or another? Think about it? 0:17:25.600 --> 0:17:27.480 Talk about it, y'all. Mommy and daddy all are married 0:17:27.480 --> 0:17:28.760 in the house anyway, Yeah. 0:17:28.840 --> 0:17:32.160 Does care? Doesn't care. She'd be thrilled to walk down 0:17:32.240 --> 0:17:37.880 the island, toss some flowers in the flower grass. It's awesome. Yeah. 0:17:38.640 --> 0:17:41.919 Is there any part of you that is concerned that 0:17:42.000 --> 0:17:45.000 if you actually did get married it would somehow change 0:17:45.000 --> 0:17:46.440 the relationship at this point? 0:17:46.520 --> 0:17:46.840 No? 0:17:46.840 --> 0:17:47.760 No, yeah, no. 0:17:48.160 --> 0:17:53.120 I think the the thing about our relationship is we've 0:17:53.160 --> 0:17:57.640 really been through so much, and again this is something 0:17:57.720 --> 0:17:59.760 you can relate to. I think that when people first 0:17:59.760 --> 0:18:03.040 start to date, it's easy to go to dinner, go 0:18:03.080 --> 0:18:04.560 to the movies, hang out and have all the fun 0:18:04.560 --> 0:18:07.840 stuff happen. But it's not until those challenges come along 0:18:07.960 --> 0:18:11.520 or difficulties, whether it be someone becoming ill, loss of work, 0:18:11.640 --> 0:18:14.400 financial struggles, whatever, that you start to see the true 0:18:14.440 --> 0:18:18.160 characteristics of a person present themselves. Because I think everyone 0:18:18.280 --> 0:18:20.320 kind of leads their best foot forward. They're not always 0:18:20.320 --> 0:18:23.080 being super authentic in the beginning with the relationship, right 0:18:23.080 --> 0:18:27.520 because everyone's protecting themselves. For us, a, we had a 0:18:27.520 --> 0:18:29.720 ten year history as friends. We knew each other for 0:18:29.720 --> 0:18:31.960 a very long time. We're at twenty six years now 0:18:31.960 --> 0:18:32.760 that we've known each other. 0:18:33.400 --> 0:18:38.679 Yeah, it's so cute, kidding, Yeah, I mean I literally 0:18:38.800 --> 0:18:40.920 used to send my girlfriends to stay at her house. 0:18:41.240 --> 0:18:44.040 We were just we've been really really good friends and 0:18:44.080 --> 0:18:47.960 when that friendship evolved into a relationship, we were easy. 0:18:48.400 --> 0:18:51.679 Well it was easy on us, but the external circumstances 0:18:51.800 --> 0:18:55.800 of loved ones being ill, public scrutiny, all of these 0:18:55.840 --> 0:18:59.320 things happened so quickly at the beginning of our relationship. 0:18:59.680 --> 0:19:02.320 And what I admire most about Gretchen is that she 0:19:02.400 --> 0:19:06.000 doesn't run from adversity. She runs at it. She's that 0:19:06.040 --> 0:19:08.560 person that stands by your side no matter what thicker 0:19:08.600 --> 0:19:08.919 thin like. 0:19:08.960 --> 0:19:11.920 She is just there. And when you experience that from 0:19:11.920 --> 0:19:14.600