1 00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:10,800 Speaker 1: Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks for 2 00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:13,080 Speaker 1: joining us. Hey, Susan, how are you doing? We're so 3 00:00:13,119 --> 00:00:13,920 Speaker 1: excited to be here. 4 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:17,400 Speaker 2: What's do with it? My stitches are almost all melting here, 5 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:20,000 Speaker 2: so melting? How are you feeling? 6 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:22,200 Speaker 1: I'm kind of with you on the stitches, they are 7 00:00:22,239 --> 00:00:23,959 Speaker 1: almost coming up. For those of you who don't know, 8 00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:25,840 Speaker 1: and I can't imagine there's one of you who don't. 9 00:00:26,520 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 1: Susan and I had some minimal plastic surgery done to 10 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:33,199 Speaker 1: make us feel better about ourselves. No judgment. If you 11 00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:35,680 Speaker 1: don't do it, that's okay, but we love doing it 12 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:36,560 Speaker 1: and we feel better. 13 00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:40,320 Speaker 2: That's right. So, and I know everybody you're following our 14 00:00:40,360 --> 00:00:42,960 Speaker 2: podcast because you got to know these things. 15 00:00:43,120 --> 00:00:45,519 Speaker 1: That's right, That's right. They will to do it. 16 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:48,159 Speaker 2: Did you get tired of saying that every week? Do 17 00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:49,840 Speaker 2: we need to say this every week? 18 00:00:50,080 --> 00:00:54,480 Speaker 1: You know? I don't. Here's my thing. If they're listening, 19 00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:57,200 Speaker 1: the only thing that they have left to do is 20 00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,760 Speaker 1: hit the follow button. And the reason to hit the 21 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,000 Speaker 1: fallow the button is you don't have to search for 22 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:05,880 Speaker 1: us every day. You'll get notified. So if you haven't 23 00:01:05,959 --> 00:01:07,880 Speaker 1: hit the follow button, go find it. It's a little 24 00:01:07,880 --> 00:01:11,160 Speaker 1: plus sign up. There, go hit it, and then you 25 00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:14,760 Speaker 1: will know every time there's a new podcast and you 26 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,080 Speaker 1: can hear the silliness of Susan and me. 27 00:01:17,480 --> 00:01:20,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, we just have fun doing this. We love all 28 00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:22,959 Speaker 2: you guys, and this week has been great because people 29 00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:27,560 Speaker 2: are sending back what they did with our advice and 30 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:29,200 Speaker 2: how it came out positive. 31 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:32,200 Speaker 1: I know, don't you love that? I love your career 32 00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 1: ahead of us. I know. I mean, it's it's not 33 00:01:35,760 --> 00:01:38,800 Speaker 1: that we're giving We're not therapists for sure, but we've 34 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:41,720 Speaker 1: lived a lot of life, We've lived a lot of advice, 35 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:43,839 Speaker 1: and so we've you know, we got some answers here. 36 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:47,120 Speaker 2: So anyway, keep about to submit the questions. 37 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 1: Yes, right, it's that part. 38 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:51,880 Speaker 2: I can say Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hours. 39 00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:53,080 Speaker 2: There you go, all you have to do. 40 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:55,320 Speaker 1: Let's it all right, before we get into some of 41 00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,000 Speaker 1: those great questions, let's do our topic of the day. 42 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:03,120 Speaker 1: All right, you're ready? What questions should you be asking 43 00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:06,440 Speaker 1: on the first few dates when you're seeing someone? And 44 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:09,880 Speaker 1: what should I know about someone before making them my 45 00:02:10,040 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 1: official boyfriend or girlfriend? 46 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:16,040 Speaker 2: Recently I've shared this with you about how to get 47 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:20,359 Speaker 2: to know somebody within the first few minutes. So Kathy, 48 00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:23,080 Speaker 2: you go ahead and answer first, and then I'm going 49 00:02:23,160 --> 00:02:26,680 Speaker 2: to read these five power quote No, I have them, Okay, 50 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:31,079 Speaker 2: go ahead, go ahead. I haven't used it yet. Okay, 51 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:34,440 Speaker 2: I just wrote them down and I really want to 52 00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:38,720 Speaker 2: do this, all right, Five powerful questions so that you 53 00:02:38,880 --> 00:02:43,440 Speaker 2: kind of know somebody. Number one, what makes you feel 54 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:48,280 Speaker 2: most alive? How about if we pretend we're the first one. Kathy, 55 00:02:48,280 --> 00:02:50,840 Speaker 2: I'm going to ask you these questions and then at 56 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:53,839 Speaker 2: the end we'll see how much we know. So if 57 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:54,760 Speaker 2: someone to ask. 58 00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:56,600 Speaker 1: Me, this is only a half hour show and we 59 00:02:56,639 --> 00:02:57,240 Speaker 1: have trying for this. 60 00:02:57,400 --> 00:03:00,760 Speaker 2: What makes you feel most alive? I would have to 61 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:02,200 Speaker 2: think about that, right, No, what. 62 00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:09,240 Speaker 1: Makes me most alive is being outside, walking, hiking, scene 63 00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 1: sights that I've never seen before. 64 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:14,280 Speaker 2: Okay, what's the best compliment you ever received? 65 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:20,880 Speaker 1: That the best compliment? Oh, I don't know. I can't 66 00:03:20,880 --> 00:03:21,320 Speaker 1: answer that. 67 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,120 Speaker 2: I mean, okay, what's your idea of a perfect day? 68 00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:29,720 Speaker 1: Perfect day for me alone or with someone. If I 69 00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:34,200 Speaker 1: were with someone, it would be getting up, sharing coffee together, 70 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:36,440 Speaker 1: chatting about the day, and then doing something together. 71 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:39,240 Speaker 2: A perfect day having someone to do that with. Right, 72 00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:42,800 Speaker 2: what's the best piece of advice you've ever received. 73 00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:48,040 Speaker 1: Live your life and do the things you love, and 74 00:03:48,080 --> 00:03:50,040 Speaker 1: the right people will come into your life. 75 00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:55,040 Speaker 2: What's one thing that you wish people could understand about 76 00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:55,600 Speaker 2: you better? 77 00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:59,920 Speaker 1: That my sense of humor is often trying to cover 78 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:01,560 Speaker 1: or a sensitive. 79 00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:04,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, but if you were to ask somebody knew those 80 00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:07,720 Speaker 2: fives I think they've done for the hills, Well, I 81 00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:10,560 Speaker 2: would share, like I just got this. Let's play this 82 00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:12,520 Speaker 2: game and we'll get to know each other, make it fun. 83 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:15,600 Speaker 2: But I think you would know somebody a little bit 84 00:04:16,440 --> 00:04:18,880 Speaker 2: how they think and what they think a fun day 85 00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:22,000 Speaker 2: is and right? How else are you going to figure 86 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:22,640 Speaker 2: those things out? 87 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:25,560 Speaker 1: No? I think those are actually very good questions. Yeah, 88 00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:27,960 Speaker 1: how much would you need to know about someone before 89 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:34,159 Speaker 1: you made them your official boyfriend? Enough? Did you say enough? 90 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:38,400 Speaker 2: Yeah? I mean how much can you know? You know 91 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:42,080 Speaker 2: the outward signs, you know, what kind of a job 92 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:44,080 Speaker 2: he has, what kind of a family life he has? 93 00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:48,240 Speaker 2: They are all no brainers. But you don't really know 94 00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:52,440 Speaker 2: somebody until you are the girlfriend or the boyfriend. You know, 95 00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:56,120 Speaker 2: if you get into the little things, Because like we 96 00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:58,440 Speaker 2: just talked about not too long ago, all the fun 97 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:01,840 Speaker 2: fuzzy stuff the girl that doesn't one doesn't have enough 98 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:03,920 Speaker 2: sex or they don't make out, you know what I mean, 99 00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:07,080 Speaker 2: as you lose things that when you get too comfortable 100 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:10,159 Speaker 2: with one another. So, yeah, how about you. 101 00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:14,479 Speaker 1: I think i'd have to know for me if if 102 00:05:14,520 --> 00:05:17,880 Speaker 1: he's my boyfriend, which so at my age sounds so 103 00:05:17,920 --> 00:05:20,960 Speaker 1: weird to say that, But if he's my boyfriend, that 104 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:25,039 Speaker 1: my person. I like that better. That we're committing to 105 00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:27,560 Speaker 1: each other. That means we're only sleeping with each other. 106 00:05:27,520 --> 00:05:29,159 Speaker 2: To make it know we're on the same page. 107 00:05:29,279 --> 00:05:33,720 Speaker 1: Yeah, we're on the same page, absolutely. I mean that's that. 108 00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:35,000 Speaker 2: Was Yeah, that was an easy one. 109 00:05:35,240 --> 00:05:37,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, any think all right? How about we give some 110 00:05:37,839 --> 00:05:43,600 Speaker 1: advice here? Okay, I love this all right? Anonymous asks, Hi, 111 00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:47,240 Speaker 1: Kathy and Susan. I've been loving your podcast and I'm 112 00:05:47,279 --> 00:05:49,760 Speaker 1: hoping you are able to offer me some advice. I 113 00:05:49,760 --> 00:05:51,640 Speaker 1: don't know, Susan, you think we can offer some advice? 114 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:52,279 Speaker 2: I think so? 115 00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:55,920 Speaker 1: All right. I am twenty eight and developed a close 116 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:58,920 Speaker 1: friendship with a coworker this year who is twenty nine. 117 00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:02,120 Speaker 1: We work together and hit it off right away with 118 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:07,360 Speaker 1: mutual interests, similar senses of humor and values. Up until recently, 119 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:10,760 Speaker 1: we saw each other just as friends, but started chatting 120 00:06:10,839 --> 00:06:14,719 Speaker 1: more outside of work. Feelings grew, and we both admitted 121 00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:18,240 Speaker 1: that we like each other as more than friends. The 122 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:21,040 Speaker 1: only problem is that we are both healing from past 123 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:24,880 Speaker 1: relationships and that neither of us are ready to pursue 124 00:06:24,920 --> 00:06:27,440 Speaker 1: one another and give one hundred percent to a relationship 125 00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:30,719 Speaker 1: right now. He was engaged and his fiance cheated on 126 00:06:30,839 --> 00:06:33,640 Speaker 1: him right before their wedding last year, and I'm coming 127 00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:36,839 Speaker 1: out of a toxic relationship, so there's a lot to 128 00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:40,400 Speaker 1: unpack on both ends. I am planning to start therapy 129 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:44,280 Speaker 1: as is he, and we have already taken positive steps 130 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:48,359 Speaker 1: forward from our past. We have put boundaries in place 131 00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:52,120 Speaker 1: regarding how often we chat, texts, etc. Though have struggled 132 00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:54,520 Speaker 1: to maintain this as we both really like each other 133 00:06:54,720 --> 00:06:58,120 Speaker 1: and have a strong attraction. We have discussed focusing on 134 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:00,760 Speaker 1: our friendship right now while trying to put our feelings 135 00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:03,600 Speaker 1: for one another side. I really like him and want 136 00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:06,440 Speaker 1: to continue talking and just spend time together as friends, 137 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:08,680 Speaker 1: but I don't know if this would help or hurt 138 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:13,080 Speaker 1: things between us and any potential relationship. While I'm not 139 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:16,600 Speaker 1: holding out hope on a relationship, I truly do hope 140 00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:20,320 Speaker 1: this is just a right person, wrong timing kind of thing. 141 00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:23,400 Speaker 1: If anything, I do not want to lose our friendship. 142 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:26,280 Speaker 1: You two always share such great advice, and I'm hoping 143 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:28,320 Speaker 1: you can help me out with this. Love you both. 144 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 1: I think you and I are going to come up 145 00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:32,040 Speaker 1: with the same answer. What do you say say is that? 146 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:34,840 Speaker 2: Well? First of all, I'm still stuck on we have 147 00:07:35,160 --> 00:07:40,520 Speaker 2: put boundaries in place regarding how often we chatized. 148 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:43,240 Speaker 1: I told you we were going to buck you don't 149 00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:47,480 Speaker 1: do that. Hey, listen, I love you, Susan. I going 150 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:49,880 Speaker 1: to agree on this. I was like, there's no way, 151 00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:55,000 Speaker 1: not only that the right one that I love to 152 00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:59,200 Speaker 1: do all this work about it, You're going to ruin it, Anonymous. 153 00:07:59,560 --> 00:08:02,720 Speaker 1: If you have strong feelings from and he does for you, 154 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:08,040 Speaker 1: it couldn't It could be the right guy right time. 155 00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:12,280 Speaker 1: Why why do you insist on? Do you can do 156 00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:14,640 Speaker 1: the work while you're still seeing him? 157 00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:18,800 Speaker 2: She's saying, I would for this opportunity to actually discussed 158 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:22,000 Speaker 2: focusing on our friendship right now. 159 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:24,840 Speaker 1: That's you know what's Anonymous, You're gonna end up with 160 00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:28,040 Speaker 1: a friend, not a boyfriend. I think you should go 161 00:08:28,120 --> 00:08:30,600 Speaker 1: down the road. You just get the therapy, there's wouldn't 162 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:31,760 Speaker 1: you go down the road? Isn't? 163 00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:36,560 Speaker 2: Well, what we don't know is how long ago the 164 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:39,120 Speaker 2: breakup was. I mean, i'll give her that said. 165 00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:41,920 Speaker 1: Well, her fiance was a year last, you know, the 166 00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:42,760 Speaker 1: last year. 167 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:46,400 Speaker 2: Okay, and he's planning on going to therapy and it's 168 00:08:46,440 --> 00:08:47,400 Speaker 2: already been a year. 169 00:08:47,559 --> 00:08:49,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, so that's a little I like. 170 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:51,040 Speaker 2: Read things all over the place. 171 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:52,440 Speaker 1: I mean, if you are. 172 00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:55,840 Speaker 2: Struggling inside only you know that, then you need therapy 173 00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:59,840 Speaker 2: for yourself, that's great. But if you've found somebody that you're. 174 00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:03,920 Speaker 1: A she's just coming out of the toxic though. Yeah, 175 00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:08,000 Speaker 1: so I think you know your chance, you take a chance. 176 00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:12,400 Speaker 1: But Susan's absolutely right. If there's the only red flag 177 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:15,600 Speaker 1: I see in this is he broke up a year 178 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:20,400 Speaker 1: ago and he hasn't done any work yet, So I might. 179 00:09:20,280 --> 00:09:22,719 Speaker 2: Be her with all this focusing stuff like you need 180 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:25,320 Speaker 2: to to out it and you know what, if it 181 00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:28,120 Speaker 2: doesn't work out, it tried and you enjoyed the moment. 182 00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:33,680 Speaker 2: I mean, don't read into Harry Free lighting up. 183 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:37,760 Speaker 1: This person anonymous. We love you, We love that you 184 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:42,760 Speaker 1: have this opportunity with this guy. You know, too many boundaries, 185 00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:47,200 Speaker 1: you know what too many boundaries cause more a wall 186 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:51,280 Speaker 1: a wall that you just can't get all a brick wall. 187 00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:55,480 Speaker 1: So try try, just go for it, go for it 188 00:09:55,559 --> 00:09:59,520 Speaker 1: and let and please let right back and let us know. Yeah, 189 00:09:59,520 --> 00:10:02,480 Speaker 1: we you want to know how this goes. But I 190 00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:04,320 Speaker 1: don't think it's the right I think it could be 191 00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 1: the right person. I just disagree with you that. 192 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:09,559 Speaker 2: It sounds like the chemistry is there. It sounds as 193 00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:14,280 Speaker 2: if like they're both attracted and off to wh whoa wait, 194 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:16,560 Speaker 2: we don't want to get ahead of ourselves. And then 195 00:10:16,600 --> 00:10:17,600 Speaker 2: you kiss him and it's like. 196 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:20,720 Speaker 1: Forget him out. I don't know you, and I just 197 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:23,559 Speaker 1: will you and I believe in love. And if she's 198 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:26,280 Speaker 1: into the sky and he says into her, take a 199 00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:28,960 Speaker 1: chance to get your word tire dating. 200 00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:33,080 Speaker 2: The word toxic is scary, and I hear where she's 201 00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:36,760 Speaker 2: coming from. But let things go a little bit. Heal yourself, 202 00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:38,960 Speaker 2: all right. The next question is it so you said 203 00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:44,000 Speaker 2: let it go your past? Oh, let go your past? Okay, yeah, 204 00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:44,959 Speaker 2: the toxic thing. 205 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:46,960 Speaker 1: And I'm glad you're going to therapy and hopefully he 206 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:47,480 Speaker 1: does too. 207 00:10:55,760 --> 00:10:59,400 Speaker 2: So we have another another anonymous Hi, Susan and Kathy, 208 00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:02,959 Speaker 2: I need some advice on how to help my in 209 00:11:03,040 --> 00:11:06,800 Speaker 2: laws with their finances. Here's a little background. My father 210 00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:09,760 Speaker 2: in law's business fell apart fifteen years ago and the 211 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:15,240 Speaker 2: family lost everything the business, their house, their cars. My 212 00:11:15,480 --> 00:11:18,760 Speaker 2: husband and his parents were in and out of hotels 213 00:11:18,840 --> 00:11:22,280 Speaker 2: during this time, and they racked up a lot of debt. 214 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:24,959 Speaker 2: Over the past fifteen years. My mother in law has 215 00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:28,640 Speaker 2: worked multiple jobs to support the family, while my father 216 00:11:28,679 --> 00:11:31,679 Speaker 2: in law refused to go back to work after this 217 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:36,200 Speaker 2: because he was depressed. Now in the present, my husband 218 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:39,200 Speaker 2: and I are thirty years old with a two year 219 00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:43,480 Speaker 2: old and hopefully another on the way soon. Congratulations. My 220 00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:48,520 Speaker 2: in laws received recently informed us of several debts that 221 00:11:48,559 --> 00:11:52,080 Speaker 2: they have that they are adding up. My husband and 222 00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:54,959 Speaker 2: I do well for ourselves, but by no means are 223 00:11:55,040 --> 00:11:58,160 Speaker 2: raking in extra money that we don't know what to 224 00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:01,520 Speaker 2: do with. That being said, we have come to the 225 00:12:01,559 --> 00:12:06,360 Speaker 2: realization that we will likely have to help financially when 226 00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:10,360 Speaker 2: my mother in law retires in four years. My in 227 00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:14,560 Speaker 2: laws are hesitant to discuss these debts and their finances further, 228 00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:18,440 Speaker 2: but my husband and I feel like we deserve to 229 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:22,880 Speaker 2: know what their money is going towards. If we are 230 00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:28,000 Speaker 2: likely going to be funding their retirement. We have explained 231 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:30,760 Speaker 2: to them that we would need them to move closer 232 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:33,960 Speaker 2: to us. Currently they are a twelve hour drive away. 233 00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:37,400 Speaker 2: Oh god, as my husband is the only child, and 234 00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:39,959 Speaker 2: we won't be able to do a hop, skip and 235 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:45,719 Speaker 2: jump away if something medically happens to one of them. 236 00:12:45,760 --> 00:12:48,400 Speaker 2: They can't just fly over there. Okay, this conversation never 237 00:12:48,440 --> 00:12:52,080 Speaker 2: goes over well as they are reluctant, reluctant to move 238 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:56,240 Speaker 2: down south? How would you address this conversation with them? 239 00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:59,600 Speaker 2: And do you think we are being unreasonable for want 240 00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:04,080 Speaker 2: enclaslay into their finances and them to move closer to us. 241 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:13,959 Speaker 2: Thank you? Wow, I record, they're not changing. They're not changing, 242 00:13:14,440 --> 00:13:16,520 Speaker 2: and they're not They're not going to The only child 243 00:13:16,640 --> 00:13:20,000 Speaker 2: is going to be stuck. I mean, that's why you 244 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:22,240 Speaker 2: never want to be an only child. First of all, 245 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:24,720 Speaker 2: I have so many problems with this. First of all, Anonymous, 246 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:27,400 Speaker 2: I think you are lovely you and your husband that 247 00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:32,320 Speaker 2: you are willing to consider supporting them given that your 248 00:13:32,440 --> 00:13:36,440 Speaker 2: father in law never got another job. Doesn't sound like 249 00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:38,920 Speaker 2: he got therapy, doesn't sound like he did any group 250 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,319 Speaker 2: work to get him out of his depression. I don't 251 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,760 Speaker 2: know if he took medication, but you know, it's sort 252 00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:45,760 Speaker 2: of like he's going to do his thing and now 253 00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:47,040 Speaker 2: you're going to take care of him. 254 00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:51,760 Speaker 1: So I struggled out a little bit. I think you absolutely, 255 00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:54,760 Speaker 1: I don't know, Susan. You know me. I think you 256 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:58,480 Speaker 1: absolutely can say. Look, guys, if if you need money 257 00:13:58,480 --> 00:14:01,440 Speaker 1: from us, money comes at a cost, and the cost 258 00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:03,840 Speaker 1: is you have to share your finances with us, and 259 00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:06,360 Speaker 1: where the money's going, you have to move closer to 260 00:14:06,440 --> 00:14:08,640 Speaker 1: us because we can't get there to you. Now. 261 00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:11,160 Speaker 2: They don't want to ask them for money yet they're 262 00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:13,120 Speaker 2: just telling them the debt that's growing. 263 00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:15,720 Speaker 1: Well, they think they're telling them because they want them to, 264 00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:18,880 Speaker 1: you know, buy a box of chocolates. They're telling them 265 00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:22,840 Speaker 1: because they need help. But that is a good point, Susan. 266 00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:26,480 Speaker 1: Maybe they should wait until they ask for help. Maybe 267 00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:26,920 Speaker 1: you do that. 268 00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:29,320 Speaker 2: Because it's not going to change a damn thing. They 269 00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:32,000 Speaker 2: are who they are. I'm a little concerned with the 270 00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:35,240 Speaker 2: father never going back to work. Depression is real. I 271 00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:37,560 Speaker 2: get it. I'm not excusing it. And there's medication, but 272 00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:41,640 Speaker 2: he sounds like he gave up. Yeah, and that's not 273 00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:43,440 Speaker 2: fair to his only ch that's. 274 00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:43,920 Speaker 1: What I'm saying. 275 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,760 Speaker 2: He's supposed to pick up the pieces. 276 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:49,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, and they have a young family, and you know 277 00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:52,600 Speaker 1: it says my in laws recently informed us. Well, they, 278 00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:54,600 Speaker 1: like I said, they weren't informing you because they were 279 00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:57,920 Speaker 1: about to tell you they want the lottery. They're informing 280 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:01,080 Speaker 1: you because they want help. And I believe them. Who 281 00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:06,000 Speaker 1: has the gold makes the rules, right, So if you, Anonymous, 282 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:09,320 Speaker 1: and your husband are going to be supporting them and 283 00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:12,840 Speaker 1: funding their life, guess what you get to make the rules. 284 00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:14,720 Speaker 1: And I don't mean to sound harsh. 285 00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:16,120 Speaker 2: No, I know, but I still want to know what 286 00:15:16,120 --> 00:15:17,560 Speaker 2: the father's doing and what is he doing. 287 00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:20,160 Speaker 1: He's probably sitting around reading the newspapers or. 288 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,840 Speaker 2: And the mother's out working and she's not going to 289 00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:27,000 Speaker 2: retire for four more years, right? Is there a pension? 290 00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:30,120 Speaker 2: Is there a just working odd jobs? Don't I need 291 00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:30,800 Speaker 2: more details? 292 00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:33,800 Speaker 1: But I also think they need to. Yes, we need 293 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:36,480 Speaker 1: more details. And guess who else needs more details? They do? 294 00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:38,680 Speaker 1: They do? So Anonymous, you need to have this hard 295 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:42,840 Speaker 1: conversation with your husband. Does your husband needs to say, Okay. 296 00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:46,160 Speaker 2: Look, you know she is a saint, this woman, Like. 297 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:49,040 Speaker 1: That's what I said, You're a sant anonymous, Well, let 298 00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:51,400 Speaker 1: us know what happens. Good luck. It's a very hard 299 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:54,200 Speaker 1: situation to be in. And I'm sorry, and I hope 300 00:15:54,240 --> 00:15:56,360 Speaker 1: you do have that second child, and. 301 00:15:56,440 --> 00:15:59,800 Speaker 2: I would start stashing some money that nobody knows about it, 302 00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:04,240 Speaker 2: because if you guys go broke, at least just well 303 00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:07,560 Speaker 2: you knowsthy, they end up moving in with you because 304 00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:12,160 Speaker 2: you can't. It's nightmare. I see a nightmare. 305 00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:15,080 Speaker 1: Don't let that happen, Anonymous. Don't not make as bad 306 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:18,840 Speaker 1: choices they did. Sometimes you have them, don't move them 307 00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:21,160 Speaker 1: closed right away? No no, no, no, no no no, 308 00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,320 Speaker 1: keep them. Well, it depends how old they are. What 309 00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:25,040 Speaker 1: are they going to do? They don't have any other family, 310 00:16:25,080 --> 00:16:28,960 Speaker 1: and they have health issues. That's a no brainer. Yeah, 311 00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:32,480 Speaker 1: but I think you I really were beating a dead horser. 312 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,360 Speaker 1: But I really think if you guys are going to 313 00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:36,960 Speaker 1: be supporting them, you get to set the allowance, you 314 00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,520 Speaker 1: get to set the rules. And it's really hard because 315 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:42,440 Speaker 1: you're switching roles. You're becoming the parents and they're becoming 316 00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:45,720 Speaker 1: the kids. And that's resist. All right, let's move on, 317 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:50,240 Speaker 1: all right. Another anonymous, Another anonymous, how do you compromise 318 00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:54,320 Speaker 1: on wedding expectations. I come from a small family that 319 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:56,600 Speaker 1: I am not close to, and I have had to 320 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,480 Speaker 1: work really hard for my savings and everything I have. 321 00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:03,080 Speaker 1: My significant other comes from a large family that is 322 00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:06,919 Speaker 1: used to grand get together as weddings, et cetera. My 323 00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:09,320 Speaker 1: family will not help me pay for a wedding, and 324 00:17:09,359 --> 00:17:12,520 Speaker 1: I do not want to disappoint my significant other when 325 00:17:12,560 --> 00:17:15,280 Speaker 1: the time comes, because I want to use my savings 326 00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:18,399 Speaker 1: on a home rather than pain to provide food and 327 00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:21,920 Speaker 1: alcohol to hundreds. Love you ladies, and I listen every week. 328 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:25,720 Speaker 2: You definitely do have a conversation. And if his family 329 00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:28,040 Speaker 2: loves all that, a lot of times his family will 330 00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:31,080 Speaker 2: help pay. That's the only way they're going to have 331 00:17:31,160 --> 00:17:33,760 Speaker 2: the kind of wedding that they expect. They're going to 332 00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:36,040 Speaker 2: have to help pay for it. Because you have a 333 00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:39,040 Speaker 2: great brain and you're right use that money for a 334 00:17:39,080 --> 00:17:39,879 Speaker 2: down payment on it. 335 00:17:40,119 --> 00:17:42,320 Speaker 1: Yes, exactly, And you know what I thought you were 336 00:17:42,320 --> 00:17:46,080 Speaker 1: going to say? Our favorite word, Susan. You need to communicate, communicate, 337 00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:49,679 Speaker 1: come to your significant What are the three c's. I 338 00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:55,479 Speaker 1: don't know, Collaborate, communic co I don't know what compromise. 339 00:17:55,440 --> 00:18:02,120 Speaker 2: Compromise, communicate, compromise, create. I was going to say, consider it. 340 00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:03,840 Speaker 2: I forgot my three words. 341 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:04,879 Speaker 1: We'll come backward. 342 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:07,440 Speaker 2: This is what happens when you're sixty seven. Anybody else 343 00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:08,760 Speaker 2: out there forget things? 344 00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:11,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, just a little, But listen to what I'm saying. 345 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:15,360 Speaker 1: I really do think that you you have to talk 346 00:18:15,359 --> 00:18:20,160 Speaker 1: to your significant other, communicate with him or her about 347 00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:22,080 Speaker 1: and more expectations. 348 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:25,320 Speaker 2: Huh, and her mother in law to be just be 349 00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:28,200 Speaker 2: sad puppy face and go talk to the mother in law. 350 00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:30,360 Speaker 2: Say you don't have just a mother in law, yes, 351 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:35,360 Speaker 2: because that's who's going to pay No excuse me, I'm 352 00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:37,720 Speaker 2: just picturing the whole You. 353 00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:40,480 Speaker 1: Don't I disagree, Susan, You don't go to the mother 354 00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:43,800 Speaker 1: in law. If the in laws want to step up 355 00:18:43,840 --> 00:18:45,600 Speaker 1: and say, listen a lot guys, we know you don't 356 00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,639 Speaker 1: have a lot of money. We'd like to throw you 357 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:51,120 Speaker 1: the wedding and provide food and alcohol for hundreds, then 358 00:18:51,240 --> 00:18:54,359 Speaker 1: you can do that. But but Anonymous, here's I just 359 00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:56,560 Speaker 1: said this in the last question. Them who has the 360 00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:59,320 Speaker 1: gold makes the rules. If they pay for your wedding, 361 00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:02,000 Speaker 1: they're going to have a lot of expectations about how 362 00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:05,920 Speaker 1: it should be. So if you want the wedding you want, 363 00:19:06,119 --> 00:19:09,840 Speaker 1: then you talk to your partner, you guys working among yourselves, 364 00:19:10,119 --> 00:19:12,080 Speaker 1: and then if they come to you and say, well, 365 00:19:12,119 --> 00:19:14,199 Speaker 1: you know we want this, we want that, you can say, well, 366 00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:16,119 Speaker 1: you know what, it's our wedding and this is what 367 00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:17,080 Speaker 1: we've decided to do. 368 00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:22,679 Speaker 2: No mom, Mom comes in with the checkbook. Yeah, just 369 00:19:22,720 --> 00:19:26,399 Speaker 2: how it is with you. I know I don't spend 370 00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:28,199 Speaker 2: your house money on No do not. 371 00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:36,440 Speaker 1: All right? 372 00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:40,560 Speaker 2: Question number four another anonymous Hi, Kathy and Susan. I 373 00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:43,800 Speaker 2: am loving the podcast. I really look forward to hearing 374 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:48,719 Speaker 2: your podcast each week, especially the fan questions Friday episodes. 375 00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:52,639 Speaker 2: I have a question for y'all about job happiness and 376 00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:56,919 Speaker 2: what is normal. I recently graduated school in May of 377 00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,920 Speaker 2: this year and have been working since the middle of June. 378 00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:02,760 Speaker 2: I got a job in what I went to school for, 379 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:06,239 Speaker 2: so it would seem like I am right where I 380 00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:10,719 Speaker 2: want it, except I am unhappy in my job. It 381 00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:14,160 Speaker 2: is hard to put every single thing that I am 382 00:20:14,240 --> 00:20:18,800 Speaker 2: unhappy about into words here, but it basically stems from 383 00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:23,119 Speaker 2: me feeling like my boss doesn't fully appreciate me and 384 00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:26,960 Speaker 2: what I do for him. And I have an hour 385 00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:31,080 Speaker 2: long commute one way which I also don't like. I 386 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:34,760 Speaker 2: do like the majority of my coworkers, so it isn't 387 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:38,760 Speaker 2: all bad. I guess. My question is, how do you 388 00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:41,919 Speaker 2: know that it is time to leave a job, and 389 00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:45,720 Speaker 2: when is it too soon to leave a job? How 390 00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:49,200 Speaker 2: do you discern being unhappy because this is my first 391 00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:53,800 Speaker 2: real job and work is work, versus being unhappy because 392 00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:57,840 Speaker 2: it is actually not a good job. I have asked 393 00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:02,400 Speaker 2: my family and friend's opinions, but I'd love an unbiased opinion. 394 00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:06,440 Speaker 2: Thank you in advance if you choose to answer my question. Well, 395 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:11,399 Speaker 2: of course we are oh an hour each way is 396 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:16,199 Speaker 2: a lot. It's your first one. You definitely want to 397 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:18,280 Speaker 2: have something good on the resume, so you don't want 398 00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:19,879 Speaker 2: to leave too soon? Am I right? Kathy? 399 00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:23,960 Speaker 1: There? Yeah? I mean she says that she graduated school 400 00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:26,879 Speaker 1: in May and he's been working since the middle of June, 401 00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:32,639 Speaker 1: so she's been working five what five months? Well, here's 402 00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:36,760 Speaker 1: the thing I think she can start. You're looking your 403 00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:39,440 Speaker 1: boss when you say he doesn't fully appreciate you, sweetie. 404 00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:42,200 Speaker 1: I don't mean to sound awful, but you're working. 405 00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:42,879 Speaker 2: He doesn't. 406 00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:45,879 Speaker 1: He doesn't know it. Yeah, yeah, and he doesn't have to, 407 00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:49,359 Speaker 1: you know, he has to provide a civil, good work environment, 408 00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:51,680 Speaker 1: but he doesn't have to, you know, come into which 409 00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:54,520 Speaker 1: he appreciates you. That may be your age a little 410 00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:54,840 Speaker 1: bit that. 411 00:21:56,400 --> 00:22:00,240 Speaker 2: You' yes, you know what I'm saying. I'm curious about 412 00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:02,120 Speaker 2: what kind of job it was. She said she got 413 00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:05,320 Speaker 2: a job that she went to school for. There's a 414 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:08,320 Speaker 2: lot of people that train and go to school and 415 00:22:08,359 --> 00:22:11,360 Speaker 2: get degrees in something that they just don't love. And 416 00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:14,280 Speaker 2: my advice is do something you enjoy doing. 417 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:18,639 Speaker 1: Well. Two things here. She took the job knowing it 418 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:22,320 Speaker 1: was an hour commute each way, So that to me is, yeah, 419 00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:25,959 Speaker 1: you know, that's not much you can do about that. 420 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:29,040 Speaker 1: I think that you haven't been in the workforce long 421 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:33,280 Speaker 1: enough to know. Susan's absolutely right. If you've decided, you know, 422 00:22:33,359 --> 00:22:34,840 Speaker 1: you went to school to be a nurse and you 423 00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:37,080 Speaker 1: hate nursing because you pass out at the sight of blood, 424 00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:41,480 Speaker 1: then you know, maybe you have to backtrack and rethink 425 00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:46,119 Speaker 1: the whole thing. But understand, I don't mean to be 426 00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:48,560 Speaker 1: a naysayer here, but you know, we've lived a long 427 00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:52,639 Speaker 1: time here. If you are trained for that field and 428 00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:55,240 Speaker 1: there aren't jobs in your neighborhood, clearly you would have 429 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:57,000 Speaker 1: taken one there. If it was. 430 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,879 Speaker 2: Kathy, let me do something. What do you get from 431 00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:06,320 Speaker 2: I feel like it basically stems from me feeling like 432 00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:08,720 Speaker 2: my boss doesn't fully appreciate me. 433 00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:12,080 Speaker 1: I think that's due for him. I think that's her. Yes, 434 00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:14,080 Speaker 1: that's you, That's what I'm saying. I don't That's why 435 00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:16,480 Speaker 1: I started by saying. I don't want to sound mean, 436 00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:21,880 Speaker 1: but you know, you're young and not everyone appreciates or. 437 00:23:21,920 --> 00:23:23,640 Speaker 2: Has to being coddled anymore. 438 00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:26,199 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're not being you know, they're not giving you 439 00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:30,240 Speaker 1: extra credit for passing an extra credit assignment in college. 440 00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:34,600 Speaker 1: This is the real workforce. We're, sweetie or sir whoever 441 00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:38,520 Speaker 1: I'm speaking with here. You have to earn your stripes. 442 00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:43,440 Speaker 1: And we've all had first jobs. I don't want to 443 00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:46,280 Speaker 1: tell you about my first job, and I worked my 444 00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:49,920 Speaker 1: tail off and I never felt appreciated either. That's kind 445 00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:53,360 Speaker 1: of the nature of a first job. So I think 446 00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:54,440 Speaker 1: you've got to stick it out. 447 00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:58,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm curious as to what she's doing, but like 448 00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:01,399 Speaker 2: we said, you definitely want and you're in the corporate 449 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:04,800 Speaker 2: or a professional world now, something that looks good on 450 00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:07,440 Speaker 2: your resume, so you don't want to quit too soon 451 00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,840 Speaker 2: and you do like your coworkers the hour commute, that's 452 00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:11,480 Speaker 2: a lot. 453 00:24:12,119 --> 00:24:14,679 Speaker 1: To me, But I would get but Susan think positively. 454 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:16,680 Speaker 1: You know what if you have an hour in the car, 455 00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:21,560 Speaker 1: take up reading books on tape, learn a foreign language. 456 00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:24,640 Speaker 1: You know, you make use of that hour. Make use 457 00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:26,320 Speaker 1: of that hour. It's not the worst thing, you know, 458 00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:27,800 Speaker 1: make youse to that hour. 459 00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:30,840 Speaker 2: And I would, what kind of relationship does she have? 460 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:33,480 Speaker 2: Wea her boss? Maybe you know you say, I hope 461 00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:36,280 Speaker 2: you appreciate everything I do. Am I doing a good job? 462 00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:36,560 Speaker 2: You know? 463 00:24:36,760 --> 00:24:41,320 Speaker 1: Like, well, if I'm guessing level, obviously I'm guessing she's 464 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:45,120 Speaker 1: entry left. She could be so so I know it's hard. 465 00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:49,080 Speaker 1: It's a tough transition from school to the workforce. I would. 466 00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:52,520 Speaker 1: I'm guessing your family and friends have said you cannot 467 00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:55,679 Speaker 1: quit this job yet you know you And I'm going 468 00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:58,640 Speaker 1: to get jump on that bandwagon and say you need 469 00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:00,960 Speaker 1: to stick it out a litt at least a year. 470 00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:04,399 Speaker 2: At least that's the business you want to be in. 471 00:25:04,440 --> 00:25:07,000 Speaker 1: That right And if that's the business you want to 472 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:10,159 Speaker 1: be in, then that's really easy. Look for jobs closer 473 00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:13,840 Speaker 1: to your home, and you can say the commute became 474 00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,080 Speaker 1: that could be your reason for leaving. I love my job, 475 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:18,520 Speaker 1: I love my boss. I want to continue this, but 476 00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:21,199 Speaker 1: the commute was just too long. And see if you 477 00:25:21,200 --> 00:25:23,439 Speaker 1: can find a job closer to home. But give this 478 00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:27,639 Speaker 1: guy a chance. You know, work hard for you anonymous 479 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:30,560 Speaker 1: that it is a good job though. Yeah, yes, yes, 480 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:32,320 Speaker 1: need to all right, because. 481 00:25:32,280 --> 00:25:36,040 Speaker 2: Kay, Kathy, you're ready, it's my turn to say. We're 482 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:36,880 Speaker 2: going to play a game. 483 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:40,360 Speaker 1: Oh yes, moral quandary. 484 00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:45,439 Speaker 2: No, we're going to play would you rather so we'll switch? 485 00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:50,200 Speaker 1: I'd rather play questrants and we will both give our thoughts. 486 00:25:50,359 --> 00:25:51,440 Speaker 1: I'll start us off. 487 00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:56,679 Speaker 2: Okay. Would you rather win a lifetime supply of skin 488 00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:59,679 Speaker 2: care products or high end shoes? 489 00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:03,000 Speaker 1: Okay, Susan, I want you to guess, and I'll guess yours. 490 00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:07,119 Speaker 1: I what do you think? I would rather have skincare? Yes? 491 00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:08,480 Speaker 1: And you would rather have the shoes. 492 00:26:08,720 --> 00:26:09,400 Speaker 2: I want both? 493 00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:12,640 Speaker 1: Oh well, here she is back with both? All right? 494 00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:15,439 Speaker 1: Would you rather be able to instantly do your makeup 495 00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:18,800 Speaker 1: perfectly or have perfect hair every day? 496 00:26:20,400 --> 00:26:23,400 Speaker 2: Instantly being able to do my makeup. 497 00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:27,120 Speaker 1: Perfect that's because you have perfect hair. I want bear 498 00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:29,840 Speaker 1: and makeup. I want no but your own hair. I'm 499 00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:34,680 Speaker 1: talking about it. Listen, guys, I visited Susan where I'm 500 00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:39,200 Speaker 1: literally with the round brush blowing my hair like you can. 501 00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:42,000 Speaker 1: You can, you could read the Bible from front to 502 00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:44,240 Speaker 1: back By the time I get my hair dry. Susan's 503 00:26:44,280 --> 00:26:46,080 Speaker 1: like just ten seconds. I just need the hair and 504 00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:49,439 Speaker 1: not She's not kidding in her hair is dry and 505 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:50,119 Speaker 1: looks perfect. 506 00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:55,320 Speaker 2: Okay, I Did you rather have a time machine for 507 00:26:55,480 --> 00:27:00,360 Speaker 2: one night or a chance to redo one day in 508 00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:01,040 Speaker 2: your past? 509 00:27:01,359 --> 00:27:03,840 Speaker 1: Oh? What do you? What do you want? 510 00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:05,800 Speaker 2: I want to redo one day in my past? 511 00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:07,960 Speaker 1: Are you gonna tell me what day? No? 512 00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:08,560 Speaker 2: I am not. 513 00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:12,560 Speaker 1: I'll get you later. You know what, I don't really 514 00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:14,000 Speaker 1: have a preparation. 515 00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:18,120 Speaker 2: You want to go forward or backward? 516 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:21,200 Speaker 1: I don't. Oh, I don't want to ever go forward. 517 00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:24,919 Speaker 2: I like to see element of surprise. 518 00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:31,840 Speaker 1: All right? Would you rather be known? Oh God, wait 519 00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:34,280 Speaker 1: a minute, you're gonna you are going to laugh at 520 00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:39,359 Speaker 1: my answer? Would And gentlemen, this is like so unbelievably 521 00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:44,639 Speaker 1: a question for not me? Well, all right? Would you 522 00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:46,800 Speaker 1: rather be known for your cooking skill? And you cannot 523 00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:49,359 Speaker 1: say both? Would you rather be known for your cooking 524 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:53,399 Speaker 1: skills or your party hosting skills? Susan, you said, I 525 00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:56,280 Speaker 1: can't say both, so I'm not so pick one. I'm 526 00:27:56,320 --> 00:27:59,400 Speaker 1: already known for my cooking skills and my party skills, 527 00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:02,480 Speaker 1: so you know what I don't I have to answer cooking. 528 00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:06,160 Speaker 1: You know what I'm what the party? I am a party? 529 00:28:06,160 --> 00:28:06,760 Speaker 2: You don't cook. 530 00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:09,280 Speaker 1: I'm known for my party because, you know what I 531 00:28:09,400 --> 00:28:13,360 Speaker 1: learned a long time ago, make everyone feel when they 532 00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:16,800 Speaker 1: come in like the parties not complete until you're there. 533 00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:18,440 Speaker 1: So I'm so glad you made it. 534 00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:20,840 Speaker 2: I don't think that was a good question for us. Okay, 535 00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:25,400 Speaker 2: would you rather give up wine or cheese forever? How 536 00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:27,640 Speaker 2: dare they? 537 00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:31,200 Speaker 1: I mean, I'd rather give up cheese. I have high cholesterol? 538 00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:32,920 Speaker 1: What wine? 539 00:28:33,520 --> 00:28:35,280 Speaker 2: I don't know. I'm a cheeze girl. 540 00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,280 Speaker 1: I can't you give up? 541 00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:40,800 Speaker 2: I'm going to be punished. I'm failing this test again. 542 00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:43,920 Speaker 1: Alla, right, you know what. We could go on and on, 543 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:46,320 Speaker 1: but unfortunately our time has come to an end here, 544 00:28:46,440 --> 00:28:48,520 Speaker 1: I did I know? Okay? 545 00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:50,320 Speaker 2: One more, just one quick one? Okay? 546 00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:51,280 Speaker 1: Can you pick it? 547 00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:55,960 Speaker 2: Okay, while you're on your first date, would you rather 548 00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,760 Speaker 2: accidentally spill your drink on your date or have the 549 00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:03,080 Speaker 2: waiter accident in your lap? 550 00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:06,719 Speaker 1: What's your answer? You wanted this question? What's your answer? 551 00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:11,880 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I would like the waiter to spill 552 00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:13,400 Speaker 2: my dinner in my lap, so. 553 00:29:13,400 --> 00:29:15,520 Speaker 1: Would I know? And I'd get a clear, a full 554 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:17,040 Speaker 1: lipethan out of it. And I'd love to see what my 555 00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:18,640 Speaker 1: date did to make me feel better. 556 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:21,400 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I know we have to go. I'm 557 00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:24,000 Speaker 2: so sorry. But would you rather accidentally text your ex? 558 00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:25,760 Speaker 1: Boss? Oh? 559 00:29:25,880 --> 00:29:29,440 Speaker 2: Your ex or your boss after a few glasses of wine? 560 00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:31,440 Speaker 2: Which would you rather? 561 00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:34,000 Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't work anymore. What do you think? 562 00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:37,320 Speaker 2: Okay, well that doesn't episode? 563 00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:41,040 Speaker 1: Yeah really okay, Well, Susan would like to play this 564 00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:42,600 Speaker 1: game all day. I can't get her to do moral 565 00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:47,400 Speaker 1: quandary for thirty seconds, but she played would you rather forever? Anyway? 566 00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:49,840 Speaker 1: This was a great episode. We had so much fun 567 00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:53,280 Speaker 1: on Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour today and we're so 568 00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:54,680 Speaker 1: glad you all joined us. 569 00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:57,360 Speaker 2: Yes, and keep those questions coming back, they were really 570 00:29:57,360 --> 00:29:59,680 Speaker 2: good ones. You know how to do it right Bachelor Nation, 571 00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:02,360 Speaker 2: dot home, slash Golden Hour, or hit us up at 572 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:08,000 Speaker 2: social at Bachelor Happy Hour. Listen to Hours Golden Golden 573 00:30:08,120 --> 00:30:11,920 Speaker 2: Hour on the on the I Heart Radio. 574 00:30:11,800 --> 00:30:16,840 Speaker 1: Say it with me, Cat, I'm trying to work. I 575 00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:19,880 Speaker 1: always have any care have a great week.