1
00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,199
Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is a John your og

2
00:00:02,440 --> 00:00:04,920
Speaker 1: Okay Storytime podcast host, and we got some great stories

3
00:00:04,960 --> 00:00:06,920
Speaker 1: coming up. Before that, we have a quick two minute

4
00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:08,799
Speaker 1: break from the sponsors that keep the show a lot.

5
00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:11,200
Speaker 1: I just found out my fiance is a liar, but

6
00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:13,240
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to marry her in two weeks.

7
00:00:13,360 --> 00:00:15,159
Speaker 2: Part five. WHOA all right?

8
00:00:15,200 --> 00:00:18,079
Speaker 1: This is a story that we've been going down the

9
00:00:18,160 --> 00:00:21,760
Speaker 1: last couple of days. It is insane and it's about

10
00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:24,759
Speaker 1: to get more insane. Or we got some some tldrs

11
00:00:24,840 --> 00:00:28,360
Speaker 1: for if you just are hopping into this. So, hi everyone,

12
00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:30,200
Speaker 1: It's been a while since I logged into red on

13
00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,600
Speaker 1: this account only to see a couple one hundred messages

14
00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:35,320
Speaker 1: begging me for an update. So I figured I wouldt

15
00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:38,600
Speaker 1: least sort a few things out that are commonly being asked,

16
00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:40,400
Speaker 1: by the way. This comes from one top three nine

17
00:00:40,479 --> 00:00:43,400
Speaker 1: three four on the r slash Okay story Time subreddit.

18
00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:46,480
Speaker 1: So so tldr for everyone who's just joining. So Op

19
00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:49,680
Speaker 1: called off his wedding after finding out Sarah his fiance

20
00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:54,200
Speaker 1: was helping her sister Evelyn hide an affair. Drama Level

21
00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:57,840
Speaker 1: is teleing novella. We are we are going deep. Things

22
00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:01,920
Speaker 1: escalated when Evelyn attacked op got arrested, and later tried

23
00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:05,400
Speaker 1: to frame her soon to be ex Marty for child abuse.

24
00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:09,000
Speaker 1: All right, so Evelyn's a piece of poop. Sarah flip side,

25
00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:12,240
Speaker 1: spilled all the family tea and helped Marty win custody,

26
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:14,520
Speaker 1: but OPI is still on a wait and see terms

27
00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:17,319
Speaker 1: with her. Now, OPI's questioning trust, love and why his

28
00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:21,039
Speaker 1: life feels like a Reddit soap opera. Oh yeah does yeah?

29
00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:23,800
Speaker 1: And like really importantly, Sarah has been flipping side? But

30
00:01:24,280 --> 00:01:28,560
Speaker 1: was There was all this family drama about how Evelyn

31
00:01:28,720 --> 00:01:31,800
Speaker 1: had always been like, in her eyes, someone that she

32
00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:34,520
Speaker 1: couldn't upset, and so she's finally getting over her people

33
00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:37,720
Speaker 1: pleasing tendencies. But op is like, wait, is she still

34
00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:40,640
Speaker 1: trying to people please me? Is this relationship real? Am

35
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:43,399
Speaker 1: I just seeing this like mirror image version of her?

36
00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:46,039
Speaker 1: But I think we're going to see if op is

37
00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:49,080
Speaker 1: going to stay with this person. Oh all right, there

38
00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:52,720
Speaker 1: we go. So, first off, Marty and Evelyn are divorced.

39
00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:54,520
Speaker 1: Took a bit over a year and a half for

40
00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:57,280
Speaker 1: it to be finalized, but despite Evelyn's high jinks installing,

41
00:01:57,520 --> 00:01:59,560
Speaker 1: that seems to be about typical for where we live.

42
00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:02,200
Speaker 1: The only notable things about the divorce itself is that

43
00:02:02,240 --> 00:02:05,559
Speaker 1: Marty was granted primary physical custody of their daughter, which

44
00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:07,600
Speaker 1: was seen as a bit of a coup considering how

45
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:10,280
Speaker 1: these things usually go. But to be fair, Evelyn mostly

46
00:02:10,280 --> 00:02:12,960
Speaker 1: did that to herself. Yeah, by lying about the abuse. Definitely,

47
00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:15,600
Speaker 1: Marty's lawyer was able to make a huge stink about

48
00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:18,080
Speaker 1: her false charges in the court, as well as the

49
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:21,600
Speaker 1: psychologist reports that were combined with the fact that Marty

50
00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:25,680
Speaker 1: already had custody, and also the psychologist reports were from

51
00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:30,200
Speaker 1: their child basically saying that they had seen Evelyn and

52
00:02:30,320 --> 00:02:33,960
Speaker 1: her affair partner doing the spicy sleep yep which you

53
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,120
Speaker 1: know you don't should you shouldn't expose your children to.

54
00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:37,040
Speaker 3: Don't do that.

55
00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:39,840
Speaker 1: Him and his daughter had been living with his parents

56
00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:42,239
Speaker 1: since he filed. The judge seemed to think that it

57
00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:44,919
Speaker 1: was appropriate to basically just leave things how they were.

58
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:48,760
Speaker 1: It's true what they say, guys, possession is nine tenths

59
00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:51,079
Speaker 1: of the law. I what does that mean? Can you

60
00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:53,000
Speaker 1: guys tell us what that means? Possession? I don't know.

61
00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:55,520
Speaker 1: I've never heard that that. I mean, that's insane.

62
00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:59,400
Speaker 2: Like so, if you like, I am accusing you of something.

63
00:02:59,440 --> 00:03:02,120
Speaker 4: If you have, you know, the weapon that did it,

64
00:03:02,440 --> 00:03:05,200
Speaker 4: then that's basically all you need, even if we don't

65
00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:06,040
Speaker 4: get the full story.

66
00:03:06,160 --> 00:03:09,760
Speaker 3: A legal expression that means a person with physical possessions

67
00:03:09,800 --> 00:03:12,560
Speaker 3: of something has a stronger legal claim to it than

68
00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:15,240
Speaker 3: anyone else. It can be used in reference to property

69
00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:17,320
Speaker 3: law or criminal cases.

70
00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:19,960
Speaker 4: Ah okay, so it's almost like a squatter, Like all

71
00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:20,720
Speaker 4: right if you're.

72
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:25,320
Speaker 1: Oh, because the kid kind of had already been with Marty. Yeah,

73
00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:29,320
Speaker 1: so that's the kid should be able to continue to

74
00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:31,680
Speaker 1: staying with Marty. Keep that in mind if you ever

75
00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:34,720
Speaker 1: get divorced yourselves. The financial fallout didn't seem to be

76
00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:36,360
Speaker 1: that big of a deal. The house was sold, Marty

77
00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:38,520
Speaker 1: got a slightly bigger share of it than Evelyn did

78
00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:41,720
Speaker 1: in lieu of maintenance slash alimony. And that was that.

79
00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:44,080
Speaker 1: I actually had dinner with Marty at a little bar

80
00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:45,800
Speaker 1: and grill close to where I work one night, and

81
00:03:45,840 --> 00:03:48,600
Speaker 1: he thanked me again for my help and had a

82
00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:51,600
Speaker 1: lot of nice things to say about Sarah Whish. I appreciate. Wow,

83
00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:55,760
Speaker 1: Sarah OPI's fiance or was fiance now now just maybe

84
00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:58,600
Speaker 1: girlfriend is complicated. She's really been coming through as an

85
00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:00,800
Speaker 1: aunt for his little girl and spending time with her

86
00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:03,400
Speaker 1: pretty frequently. I didn't point out to him that this

87
00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:06,280
Speaker 1: is because there's no way she'd get to see her

88
00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:09,400
Speaker 1: when it was Evelyn's weekend, as the sisters are still

89
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:11,360
Speaker 1: not talking. But I'm sure he can figure that out

90
00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:13,840
Speaker 1: on his own. One interesting, but I still think that

91
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:17,520
Speaker 1: shows that she cares, even like I believe her, I

92
00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:20,599
Speaker 1: believe her. I think that shows that she cares. One

93
00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:23,080
Speaker 1: interesting thing that came out of that dinner is that

94
00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:26,240
Speaker 1: Marty told me that Evelyn wrote him a big letter

95
00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:30,039
Speaker 1: during the proceedings, begging him for another chance. And in

96
00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:32,719
Speaker 1: this letter she confessed a lot of things that even

97
00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:37,160
Speaker 1: Sarah was unaware of. Oh, so we're getting even more

98
00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:40,760
Speaker 1: tea like. Just to be clear, Evelyn not only cheated

99
00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:43,920
Speaker 1: on Marty but accused him of abuse to try to

100
00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:45,200
Speaker 1: get custody of their daughter.

101
00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:47,560
Speaker 3: Of their child, and then did weird things.

102
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,000
Speaker 1: And did weird weird things.

103
00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:50,359
Speaker 2: What more can one person do?

104
00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:54,320
Speaker 1: Oh there's more. John turns out this wasn't Evelyn's first

105
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:58,479
Speaker 1: adultery rodeo. Of course, She's been riding many horses. Oh,

106
00:04:58,560 --> 00:05:01,240
Speaker 1: she had cheated on Marty when they were dating, and

107
00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:04,359
Speaker 1: again shortly after they got married. Of course, Marty and

108
00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:07,000
Speaker 1: I were both stymied by that. Why would you marry

109
00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:09,560
Speaker 1: someone you were cheating on? Like, no offense to Marty here,

110
00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:12,080
Speaker 1: but he's not rich and he's not some super stud,

111
00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:15,920
Speaker 1: just a slightly quirky, normal looking high school teacher. If

112
00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:19,240
Speaker 1: Evelyn didn't like that, then she certainly didn't need to

113
00:05:19,279 --> 00:05:22,599
Speaker 1: marry him. Anyway. It blew my mind. I feel I

114
00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:26,520
Speaker 1: feel like Marty's getting dunked on unnecessarily getting dun he said.

115
00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:30,280
Speaker 3: He said, uh, slightly quirky looking high school teacher, and

116
00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:30,680
Speaker 3: I went.

117
00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:32,520
Speaker 2: To just just zumed it on me.

118
00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:35,000
Speaker 3: I mean, tell me, you don't tell me you don't

119
00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:35,680
Speaker 3: teach history.

120
00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:39,200
Speaker 1: I could see you as my cool history teacher. I

121
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:42,400
Speaker 1: could totally see you as my cool history teacher. Give

122
00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:45,600
Speaker 1: me like threekish look, does John look like a cool

123
00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:48,520
Speaker 1: history teach art teacher or something? Not a history teacher? Dude?

124
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:49,040
Speaker 3: History?

125
00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:52,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, h history teacher's cool, but it's not history history teacher.

126
00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:54,400
Speaker 2: Art, Like I teach you how to paint? Like, like,

127
00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:55,360
Speaker 2: who is it?

128
00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:57,480
Speaker 3: What did he teach? Huh huh?

129
00:05:58,240 --> 00:05:59,280
Speaker 1: People always say that's me.

130
00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:01,680
Speaker 3: Kind of both.

131
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:03,679
Speaker 1: I literally have the same haircut.

132
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:08,080
Speaker 3: But John John with no b oh.

133
00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:11,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, young John, that's true. That's fun John. Back in

134
00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:13,440
Speaker 1: the day, people do call you that. If people call

135
00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:15,640
Speaker 1: me that all the time because.

136
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:18,600
Speaker 2: The hair, Yeah, it's so you for real, for real, And.

137
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,279
Speaker 1: I did I used to have glasses just like that.

138
00:06:20,360 --> 00:06:23,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, we need to get you some some circle some like.

139
00:06:23,240 --> 00:06:24,920
Speaker 1: Really some really big ones too.

140
00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:27,680
Speaker 2: Yeah. See, princess, says our teacher.

141
00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:30,960
Speaker 1: So boom, all right, all right. If Evelyn didn't like that,

142
00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:33,560
Speaker 1: then she certainly didn't need to marry him anyway. It

143
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:35,360
Speaker 1: blew my mind. She went on to say that she

144
00:06:35,440 --> 00:06:37,440
Speaker 1: was seeing a therapist and working on herself and all

145
00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:39,800
Speaker 1: the usual stuff, but neither Marty nor I felt like

146
00:06:39,839 --> 00:06:42,039
Speaker 1: therapy would help her very much. I mean, it was

147
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:44,720
Speaker 1: clear to me that Evelyn's cheating wasn't because of some

148
00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:48,800
Speaker 1: undiagnosed childhood trauma or self esteem issues. Given what she

149
00:06:48,839 --> 00:06:50,800
Speaker 1: tried to pull in court, it's way more likely that

150
00:06:50,880 --> 00:06:53,640
Speaker 1: she has a morality problem. And I don't think therapy

151
00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:57,760
Speaker 1: can fundamentally change the nature of someone that drastically. What

152
00:06:57,760 --> 00:06:59,080
Speaker 1: do we think about that? Do you think that's true?

153
00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:02,000
Speaker 4: I mean I think that like and but this is

154
00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:05,599
Speaker 4: like you need you need the freaking the Cavalry, the

155
00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:08,120
Speaker 4: Michael Jordan, Lebron James of.

156
00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:10,880
Speaker 2: Therapy to get you this, to get to this.

157
00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:14,720
Speaker 4: But I think I don't think it can hurt, you, know,

158
00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:17,320
Speaker 4: like I feel like you can get better. Yeah, I

159
00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:20,400
Speaker 4: think she can get better. Is she just like at

160
00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:24,640
Speaker 4: her core, an unchangeable just source of pure evil?

161
00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:25,720
Speaker 2: Maybe?

162
00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:26,240
Speaker 1: I don't know.

163
00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:29,239
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think uh, I think there's extreme

164
00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:29,880
Speaker 2: edge cases.

165
00:07:29,920 --> 00:07:33,760
Speaker 1: I don't think anyone is a irredeemably bad I think

166
00:07:33,800 --> 00:07:37,360
Speaker 1: we can all make improvements. That being said, do you

167
00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:40,320
Speaker 1: have to be there while someone's improving.

168
00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:40,480
Speaker 3: No?

169
00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:43,040
Speaker 1: And I don't think you should be anywhere close to

170
00:07:43,040 --> 00:07:45,520
Speaker 1: this woman, uh.

171
00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:47,200
Speaker 2: For them to get back together?

172
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:54,200
Speaker 1: No? Please No. I share with Marty some of the

173
00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:57,080
Speaker 1: insights I had gotten from my conversations with Sarah about

174
00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:59,800
Speaker 1: her relationship and child with Evelyn, and we came to

175
00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:03,600
Speaker 1: the conclusion that fundamentally Evelyn is just a user. She

176
00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:06,600
Speaker 1: will basically do whatever she wants, use anyone how she wants,

177
00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:09,440
Speaker 1: and she will never consider how it impacts other people

178
00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:12,480
Speaker 1: because she feels she can just manipulate everyone into getting

179
00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:16,080
Speaker 1: off her back. Suffice it to say, Evelyn's letter didn't

180
00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:18,360
Speaker 1: have much of an impact on Marty, or rather, it

181
00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:21,880
Speaker 1: only firmed up his already solid resolve to divorce her.

182
00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:24,120
Speaker 1: Good Marty said that he felt that she was so

183
00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:28,720
Speaker 1: dishonest and manipulative that even her miacolpa confessions had an

184
00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:31,800
Speaker 1: air of manipulation about them, and I tend to agree.

185
00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:33,880
Speaker 1: I think it was a last ditch effort to try

186
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:40,480
Speaker 1: and appear truthful to him, but too little, too late. Secondly,

187
00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,880
Speaker 1: during this dinner, Marty also told me that he had

188
00:08:42,880 --> 00:08:45,839
Speaker 1: finally contacted the wife of Jake, the affair partner, a

189
00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:46,640
Speaker 1: couple of weeks ago.

190
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:51,560
Speaker 4: WHOA, he's been waiting on that one. He's been making

191
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:52,320
Speaker 4: him sweat.

192
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:53,480
Speaker 1: Yeah.

193
00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:54,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

194
00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:55,959
Speaker 1: I asked him why he waited so long, and he

195
00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:58,040
Speaker 1: said he just wanted to make sure that it didn't

196
00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:00,439
Speaker 1: impact his divorce with Evelyn in some way. I didn't

197
00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:03,160
Speaker 1: like that answer, but I could at least understand it.

198
00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:04,880
Speaker 1: He said that she was a nice lady who was

199
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:08,480
Speaker 1: apparently incredibly shocked when he presented her with the evidence

200
00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:10,720
Speaker 1: of what Jake and Evelyn had been up to. Remember,

201
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:12,800
Speaker 1: Marty had a video of them in his house. It

202
00:09:12,840 --> 00:09:16,600
Speaker 1: seems like missus Jake had absolutely no clue that anything

203
00:09:16,679 --> 00:09:18,600
Speaker 1: was going on. She was too busy dealing with their

204
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:22,280
Speaker 1: small child, I think one or two years old. Marty

205
00:09:22,320 --> 00:09:24,360
Speaker 1: felt pretty bad about the whole thing, but he said

206
00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:27,280
Speaker 1: that if the situation was reversed, he would want to know. Yeah.

207
00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:29,480
Speaker 1: I think that's true. I could only nod in agreement

208
00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:31,720
Speaker 1: with him here. It seems like a difficult but necessary

209
00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:34,360
Speaker 1: thing for him to do. There's no update on if

210
00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:36,720
Speaker 1: that couple are getting divorced or not, but Marty said

211
00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:39,199
Speaker 1: he had the impression that she was going to try

212
00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:41,880
Speaker 1: and salvage something due to their small child. I did

213
00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:44,000
Speaker 1: ask him if he was interested in getting back at

214
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,360
Speaker 1: the guy, but Marty just waved me off. He said

215
00:09:46,360 --> 00:09:48,800
Speaker 1: that anything he did to him would probably just make

216
00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:51,160
Speaker 1: it harder for his wife and kid, and he'd rather

217
00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:53,920
Speaker 1: just get on with his life. I think that feels true.

218
00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:56,280
Speaker 1: I can understand that. But I think Marty is a

219
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,480
Speaker 1: better guy than I am, because if I was in

220
00:09:58,559 --> 00:10:01,560
Speaker 1: his shoes, I would I've really put the screws to

221
00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:03,880
Speaker 1: that guy. Well, I guess Jake has enough of his

222
00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:06,760
Speaker 1: own problems right now. Anyway. Lastly, I know people really

223
00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:08,680
Speaker 1: want an update about me and Sarah, so here it is,

224
00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:13,840
Speaker 1: because again, Opie was about to get married to Sarah,

225
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:17,040
Speaker 1: and then it was put in its complicated territory, so

226
00:10:17,240 --> 00:10:20,280
Speaker 1: let's see what happens. We had a good trip in Queensland.

227
00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:24,000
Speaker 1: The weather was hot, but evidently pretty mild this last Christmas.

228
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,560
Speaker 1: There were lots of beach days, lots of spending time

229
00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:29,320
Speaker 1: with my nieces. Sarah's an elementary school teacher and she's

230
00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:31,840
Speaker 1: fantastic with kids, and all in all, it was a

231
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:34,000
Speaker 1: great time. I think Sarah and I both found it

232
00:10:34,080 --> 00:10:35,880
Speaker 1: really helpful to be away from home for a couple

233
00:10:35,920 --> 00:10:38,640
Speaker 1: of weeks. Being together in a different setting really helped

234
00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:40,920
Speaker 1: us focus on the here and now and not so

235
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,280
Speaker 1: much on the wild trip we'd both been on. By

236
00:10:43,320 --> 00:10:45,360
Speaker 1: the time we left to come back to the States,

237
00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:47,720
Speaker 1: we were both in a very relaxed state of mind,

238
00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:50,040
Speaker 1: and a lot of problems that we had that seemed

239
00:10:50,120 --> 00:10:53,199
Speaker 1: very difficult to get past started to feel a lot smaller. Okay,

240
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:55,200
Speaker 1: I feel like we're sailing into good territory here.

241
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:56,000
Speaker 2: We're getting there.

242
00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:58,760
Speaker 1: That's not to say there aren't still sore spots for

243
00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:02,040
Speaker 1: both of us. Predict my newfound desire to never get

244
00:11:02,040 --> 00:11:04,880
Speaker 1: married has not been easy for Sarah to adjust to

245
00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:07,920
Speaker 1: and to be frank, the better our relationship got, the

246
00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:10,320
Speaker 1: more this became an issue. I had to explain to

247
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:12,800
Speaker 1: her It's really not about us or just about us.

248
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:14,960
Speaker 1: It was more about witnessing a bunch of bull crap

249
00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:17,040
Speaker 1: in a short period of time by a lotted from

250
00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:19,640
Speaker 1: people that just turn me off to it. In general,

251
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:22,800
Speaker 1: the cheating, physical and emotional lies, the pain, all of

252
00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:25,880
Speaker 1: that just seems way too heavy for me now to contemplate.

253
00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:28,160
Speaker 1: She stowed on that for a few days, and then

254
00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,560
Speaker 1: one night while we were washing up from dinner, pausing

255
00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:33,560
Speaker 1: right here, do we think she is going to break

256
00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:35,800
Speaker 1: up with Opie or stay together with Opie?

257
00:11:36,480 --> 00:11:37,040
Speaker 2: Wow?

258
00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:40,600
Speaker 4: I feel from everything I know, just making a total guess.

259
00:11:40,960 --> 00:11:43,800
Speaker 4: Sarah is the type that's like, I want to get married,

260
00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:45,360
Speaker 4: I want to have the wedding, I want to do

261
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:48,160
Speaker 4: all this. I do think, I mean, Opie said like

262
00:11:48,679 --> 00:11:51,440
Speaker 4: it became a problem because they were basically becoming serious

263
00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:53,000
Speaker 4: about their relationship again, and she's.

264
00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:54,480
Speaker 2: Like, well, I want to get married.

265
00:11:54,920 --> 00:11:55,160
Speaker 1: You know.

266
00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:57,520
Speaker 4: At this point, all that being said, I don't think

267
00:11:57,520 --> 00:12:00,800
Speaker 4: like Schole she would break up with him.

268
00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:03,040
Speaker 3: I think so pull one or two.

269
00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:06,600
Speaker 1: I think she I think she cares about marriage a lot. Yeah,

270
00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:09,640
Speaker 1: and if she believes that Op never wants to get married,

271
00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:12,920
Speaker 1: I think she might not want to see in that relationship.

272
00:12:13,120 --> 00:12:17,160
Speaker 1: And we got three votes to break up. John's saying, Nah,

273
00:12:17,240 --> 00:12:22,840
Speaker 1: I'm hanging in with Naman ash m r. All break up.

274
00:12:22,880 --> 00:12:25,360
Speaker 1: We got seventy one, oh change.

275
00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:26,960
Speaker 2: That's going back and forth all over the place.

276
00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:29,280
Speaker 3: I think she's had time to reflect on herself and

277
00:12:29,320 --> 00:12:32,920
Speaker 3: stop the people pleasing. She's finally found out what she wants.

278
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:34,080
Speaker 1: And she wants to get married.

279
00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:36,920
Speaker 2: That would be kind of a cool character arc for her,

280
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,400
Speaker 2: but I think it's not all right.

281
00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:41,280
Speaker 1: Let's see. She stud on that for a few days,

282
00:12:41,320 --> 00:12:43,320
Speaker 1: and then one night, while we were watching up from dinner,

283
00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:46,160
Speaker 1: she asked me if I still intended to have children

284
00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:48,480
Speaker 1: someday or not. It was a fair question, one that

285
00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:50,480
Speaker 1: I hadn't really been asking myself. You see, one of

286
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:52,800
Speaker 1: the things I had been working and looking forward to

287
00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,680
Speaker 1: was starting a family with Sarah. I mean the sincerely,

288
00:12:55,720 --> 00:12:58,040
Speaker 1: she would be amazing mom. She works with kids every day,

289
00:12:58,080 --> 00:12:59,880
Speaker 1: so you would think it would put her off, but

290
00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:02,360
Speaker 1: rather you can tell it's basically her calling. Just the

291
00:13:02,360 --> 00:13:05,280
Speaker 1: way she is with my nieces is freaking adorable, So

292
00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:10,400
Speaker 1: probably having kids is like something she needs in a relationship. Anyway,

293
00:13:10,679 --> 00:13:13,360
Speaker 1: I realized that while I may have emotionally given up

294
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:16,240
Speaker 1: a marriage, I hadn't given up on having a family.

295
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:21,079
Speaker 1: What's the difference, hear me out really quick to me,

296
00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:23,600
Speaker 1: Let's say you have a kid and all this stuff happens.

297
00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:27,720
Speaker 1: It's just as it's just as heartbreaking as having a marriage.

298
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:30,280
Speaker 2: But the legal but don't have to go.

299
00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:35,160
Speaker 1: But I feel like the legal wasn't like the most

300
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:38,160
Speaker 1: toxic part of this whole process. It was like the

301
00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:41,280
Speaker 1: ripping a part of like this family union.

302
00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:43,760
Speaker 2: She did accuse him of what she accused him.

303
00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:46,280
Speaker 1: Of, Yeah, but she accused him because they had a kid,

304
00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:50,360
Speaker 1: not because not because of And so like all this

305
00:13:50,440 --> 00:13:53,520
Speaker 1: could still happen if you don't have a marriage. Pinky

306
00:13:53,640 --> 00:13:55,199
Speaker 1: Slayer says, Yeah, you don't need to be married to

307
00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:57,439
Speaker 1: have a family exactly. And the family was what was

308
00:13:57,440 --> 00:14:00,560
Speaker 1: broken up. Yeah, and that's what was so hard. And

309
00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:03,360
Speaker 1: so I'm like, if you're not emotionally ready for a marriage,

310
00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:05,200
Speaker 1: how are you emotionally ready for a kid?

311
00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:08,560
Speaker 4: Well, I maybe his thought process here is like, hey,

312
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:12,480
Speaker 4: like I do want kids, but knowing how bad it

313
00:14:12,520 --> 00:14:15,360
Speaker 4: can go, I want to mitigate. You know, it can

314
00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:17,480
Speaker 4: go bad, like if you have a kid, you are

315
00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:20,320
Speaker 4: going to court to decide customer right. But I think

316
00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:23,800
Speaker 4: my guess is he's like, let me just mitigate how

317
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:25,520
Speaker 4: much that would be? And it's like, yeah, I really

318
00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:28,320
Speaker 4: really do want kids, I really really maybe even do

319
00:14:28,600 --> 00:14:31,480
Speaker 4: want a relationship with with someone a life partner, but

320
00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:36,680
Speaker 4: I don't want the headaches that come with being legally married. Yeah,

321
00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:38,080
Speaker 4: you're right, it's very similar.

322
00:14:39,840 --> 00:14:40,960
Speaker 2: It is very similar.

323
00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,800
Speaker 4: But I think he's basically like, Hey, I want a

324
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:46,080
Speaker 4: life partner and a kid, but how do I make

325
00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:48,720
Speaker 4: it as less bad as possible?

326
00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:51,120
Speaker 2: Emmy says, legally he is more protected.

327
00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:54,080
Speaker 4: Not getting married may allow them to remain separate in

328
00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:57,320
Speaker 4: finances and set expectations.

329
00:14:57,520 --> 00:14:59,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, I do. I do think it minimizes things. But

330
00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:02,560
Speaker 1: I think I feel like, I guess your point. Yeah,

331
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,480
Speaker 1: what I'm saying is like, if you're not emotionally marriage,

332
00:15:05,720 --> 00:15:09,120
Speaker 1: if you're not like emotionally ready for like the finality

333
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:12,080
Speaker 1: of marriage, the finality of having a kid ties two

334
00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:15,560
Speaker 1: people together too, Like that's also I think as an

335
00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:18,560
Speaker 1: emotional burden, if not more of an emotional burden.

336
00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:19,880
Speaker 2: The marriage baby solf problems.

337
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:23,080
Speaker 1: That is true, but I didn't forgot baby solve problems anyway,

338
00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:24,880
Speaker 1: Opie says, I know that sounds odd, but you can

339
00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:26,720
Speaker 1: tell that I hadn't thought this through all the way.

340
00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:30,640
Speaker 1: Sarah's question basically made me think much more long term

341
00:15:30,920 --> 00:15:32,600
Speaker 1: than I had been willing to do previously, and I

342
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:34,240
Speaker 1: struggled to come up with a good answer at the time.

343
00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:35,880
Speaker 1: I was pretty open to Sarah about what I was

344
00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:38,120
Speaker 1: feeling at the time, and she seemed like she understood.

345
00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:40,520
Speaker 1: She said, I want a family too, but if you

346
00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:42,800
Speaker 1: don't want one, I'd still want to be with you.

347
00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:43,840
Speaker 2: Wow.

348
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,320
Speaker 1: I was not expecting that.

349
00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:48,240
Speaker 2: There was some respect on my nerves.

350
00:15:48,760 --> 00:15:51,560
Speaker 1: John, God, Wow.

351
00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:53,280
Speaker 3: John, you have twenty three.

352
00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:57,560
Speaker 2: That's okay. I still love you. I still love you four.

353
00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:01,000
Speaker 2: I was boom. Almost changed my mind.

354
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:01,640
Speaker 1: Oh oh yeah, I know.

355
00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:02,880
Speaker 2: It's the peer pressure too.

356
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:04,440
Speaker 1: You you you stood fast.

357
00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:09,000
Speaker 2: I stood on this visited business down.

358
00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:11,160
Speaker 1: It was nice to hear, but I'm not sure that

359
00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:13,840
Speaker 1: I would be happy if that's the case. Like I said,

360
00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:15,440
Speaker 1: Sarah would be an amazing mom, and it feels like

361
00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:17,840
Speaker 1: bull crap on my part if being with me denies

362
00:16:17,880 --> 00:16:19,920
Speaker 1: her that opportunity. We went back and forth on this

363
00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:22,560
Speaker 1: a little bit, with me trying to convince her she

364
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:24,680
Speaker 1: was giving up too much and her holding fast to

365
00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:27,040
Speaker 1: what she said and not backing down. We basically ended

366
00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:29,360
Speaker 1: the discussion with an agreement on both sides to think

367
00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,840
Speaker 1: about it more and come back and talk about it later.

368
00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:34,520
Speaker 1: So that's what I did. I know some people don't

369
00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:38,840
Speaker 1: want to have kids, but deep down inside I knew

370
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:41,760
Speaker 1: that I did. More than that. I wanted a family,

371
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,880
Speaker 1: something approximating the family I grew up in as a kid,

372
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,720
Speaker 1: and to me, that means a mother and a father

373
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:49,200
Speaker 1: together with their children, all in the same house. At

374
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:50,960
Speaker 1: this point, the point of me being married or not

375
00:16:51,040 --> 00:16:54,320
Speaker 1: becomes essentially moot, because if you split, there's still child's

376
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:57,400
Speaker 1: important custody, and you'll likely be a de factove spouse anyway.

377
00:16:57,440 --> 00:16:59,760
Speaker 1: So splitting communal property and all that jazz, it's like

378
00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:03,280
Speaker 1: the old saying six of one, half a dozen of another.

379
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:06,600
Speaker 1: What does that mean? I've got I don't know these sayings.

380
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:09,119
Speaker 1: Of course, six of one, half a dozen of another,

381
00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:10,280
Speaker 1: you get six and one.

382
00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:13,280
Speaker 2: But then I think it's like tomato tomato.

383
00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:14,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you can call it whatever you want, but

384
00:17:14,840 --> 00:17:17,520
Speaker 1: effectively it's a marriage just with a certificate or not.

385
00:17:18,359 --> 00:17:21,120
Speaker 3: Idiom used to say that one does not see any

386
00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:23,359
Speaker 3: difference between the two possible choices.

387
00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:26,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, six of one, like because like you can either

388
00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:28,840
Speaker 1: have six one or half a dozen, and half a

389
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:30,040
Speaker 1: dozen is six to two, so it's like.

390
00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:32,080
Speaker 2: The same thing got them.

391
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:34,840
Speaker 1: Once I had accepted that, I asked myself if I

392
00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:37,480
Speaker 1: would get into this kind of child rearing slash common

393
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:41,200
Speaker 1: law slash marriage type situation with any other women other

394
00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:43,320
Speaker 1: than Sarah, Like, would it be easier for me to

395
00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:45,359
Speaker 1: commit to that if it was a different woman. The

396
00:17:45,359 --> 00:17:47,439
Speaker 1: more I thought about it, the less I felt that

397
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:50,080
Speaker 1: this was true. I love Sarah that had never been

398
00:17:50,119 --> 00:17:52,760
Speaker 1: in doubt. My trust in her have been damaged pretty seriously.

399
00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:54,800
Speaker 1: But if we had more time and hadn't had a

400
00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:57,520
Speaker 1: wedding looming over our heads, we might have been able

401
00:17:57,560 --> 00:17:59,720
Speaker 1: to make it work. I felt pretty strongly that the

402
00:17:59,760 --> 00:18:02,879
Speaker 1: time constraint had played a bit a big part in

403
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:06,359
Speaker 1: me pulling the pin on the impending nuptials. Now before

404
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:09,880
Speaker 1: anyone gets their hopes up, Sarah and I didn't rush

405
00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:14,040
Speaker 1: out and get married. We did, however, sit down again

406
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:17,160
Speaker 1: and have a more serious talk about our future. One

407
00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:20,560
Speaker 1: that was frankly way overdue. I acknowledged that I still

408
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:23,119
Speaker 1: wanted to have a family in the future. She said

409
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:25,640
Speaker 1: that if we did have children together, she would prefer

410
00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:29,119
Speaker 1: to be married or at least cohabiting or cohabitating. I

411
00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:31,120
Speaker 1: pointed out to her that these were basically the same

412
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:33,720
Speaker 1: thing in our state, at least after a couple of years.

413
00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:37,080
Speaker 1: She said she knew, and that's when she surprised me

414
00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:39,760
Speaker 1: to something. She went to her purse and retrieved an

415
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:42,960
Speaker 1: envelope and handed it to me. I was expecting it

416
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,960
Speaker 1: to be another letter, but it was not. It was

417
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:51,000
Speaker 1: a pre nuptial agreement prenup and he ate seeing the biz. No,

418
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:53,760
Speaker 1: you ain't to jump. I asked her when she had

419
00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:56,360
Speaker 1: this drawn up, and she said shortly after we separated.

420
00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:58,800
Speaker 1: She had intended to plead her case with it at

421
00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:01,440
Speaker 1: the time, but thought better of it once she came

422
00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:04,159
Speaker 1: to understand my position on where things had landed in

423
00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:06,560
Speaker 1: our relationship. I felt like I needed to listen to

424
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:08,360
Speaker 1: what you were telling me instead of trying to change

425
00:19:08,359 --> 00:19:11,480
Speaker 1: your mind. She said, that's pretty solid. That's that's a bar,

426
00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:13,840
Speaker 1: right there? Is that not a bar? That's kind of

427
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:17,040
Speaker 1: a bar. If I heard that I would be like, damn,

428
00:19:17,280 --> 00:19:20,480
Speaker 1: I would. I would fall harder for the person that

429
00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:23,760
Speaker 1: said that to me, like the slip and fall, like

430
00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:28,600
Speaker 1: the slipping fall. Yeah, exactly. Boink boink.

431
00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:33,440
Speaker 2: That's what they say. It's what cheaters use. But oh yeah, instead.

432
00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:36,040
Speaker 4: Of oh I slipped the bell, but this time, it's

433
00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:38,000
Speaker 4: like I'm slipping and falling on purpose.

434
00:19:38,119 --> 00:19:41,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, instead of a heart on it's my heart on

435
00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:41,480
Speaker 1: the floor.

436
00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:42,040
Speaker 2: Exactly.

437
00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:43,560
Speaker 1: I'm slipping and falling on my heart.

438
00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:44,080
Speaker 2: Oh god.

439
00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:46,760
Speaker 1: That was a bit eye opening to me because I

440
00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:50,639
Speaker 1: thought evidently and correctly that she was much more resentful

441
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,000
Speaker 1: about the marriage being called off. She said she was

442
00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:55,159
Speaker 1: more hurt than resentful, and if she was angry, it

443
00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:58,120
Speaker 1: was at herself for being stupid. Still, she had held

444
00:19:58,119 --> 00:20:00,520
Speaker 1: onto the agreement, probably because she was hoping that the

445
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:03,679
Speaker 1: opportunity ever came up, it might prove how serious she

446
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:06,439
Speaker 1: was taking what she had done. I asked her, if

447
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,439
Speaker 1: I had asked you to marry me, who do you

448
00:20:08,440 --> 00:20:11,040
Speaker 1: have shown this to me? She said absolutely. I need

449
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:13,040
Speaker 1: you to have complete trust in me. I don't want

450
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:15,800
Speaker 1: to let you or me down. Again. I'm pretty good

451
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:18,480
Speaker 1: at reading people, and this felt like an honest statement

452
00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:21,560
Speaker 1: as I've ever heard from someone. I read the agreement

453
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:24,119
Speaker 1: and yes, I checked the date on her signature. Her

454
00:20:24,160 --> 00:20:26,880
Speaker 1: story checked out. Seemed pretty sensible to me, and there

455
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:29,399
Speaker 1: was even an infidelity clause in it where it was

456
00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:33,240
Speaker 1: spelled out exactly what was considered infidelity. It was pretty

457
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:36,080
Speaker 1: eye opening to me. Sarah Eventley considers a lot of

458
00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:38,040
Speaker 1: behavior that I might have given a pass on much

459
00:20:38,040 --> 00:20:40,520
Speaker 1: more serious. I mentioned that to her and she said

460
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:42,840
Speaker 1: we could revise it later after a good discussion, but

461
00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:45,080
Speaker 1: the main points were pretty solid, and I agreed.

462
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:50,640
Speaker 4: It mentioned infidelity, but didn't mention helping someone else with infidelity.

463
00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:53,480
Speaker 1: Hmmm, maybe that counts because that's.

464
00:20:53,359 --> 00:20:54,120
Speaker 3: The problem here.

465
00:20:54,359 --> 00:20:56,920
Speaker 2: That's that's what she did, so.

466
00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:00,840
Speaker 1: You know, heye, we'll see. Anyway, We put the agreement

467
00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:03,800
Speaker 1: aside for now and talked a little bit more about

468
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:05,639
Speaker 1: where we go from here. Short and long of it,

469
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:08,360
Speaker 1: I asked her to move back in with me. Question

470
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:11,399
Speaker 1: two with the chat question of John and Riley, is

471
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 1: that a good idea to move in right now?

472
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:16,720
Speaker 2: We don't know the exact number of months that has passed.

473
00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:19,119
Speaker 3: But they went on a trip together.

474
00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:23,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, maybe it's not a good idea. I feel like

475
00:21:23,359 --> 00:21:26,280
Speaker 4: they can progress in like every other thing except for

476
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:29,119
Speaker 4: moving in. I feel like, like, like he said, it's like, oh,

477
00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:31,679
Speaker 4: it's a bit overdue. They did take a while for

478
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:33,840
Speaker 4: op to just kind of like sit with the stought

479
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:37,440
Speaker 4: they were they were again, like he said, like mutually exclusively,

480
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:40,880
Speaker 4: patonic or whatever. They weren't seeing other people, they weren't

481
00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:43,000
Speaker 4: doing you know, hooking up with each other or anything.

482
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:46,520
Speaker 4: But I would pursue everything else in a relationship minus

483
00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:47,240
Speaker 4: moving in together.

484
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:49,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like they've been doing a lot of

485
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:54,800
Speaker 3: deep talks. He I think he's just scarred of relationships

486
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:57,320
Speaker 3: seeing what happened to Evelyn and her husband, So that's

487
00:21:57,320 --> 00:22:00,679
Speaker 3: why he's hurt. But I'm down for the movie together.

488
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:02,840
Speaker 1: I think we need a little bit more time. I mean,

489
00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:03,920
Speaker 1: how long has it been a year.

490
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:05,160
Speaker 2: I don't even know if it's been a year.

491
00:22:05,200 --> 00:22:06,960
Speaker 1: I feel like I think maybe at the year mark

492
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,800
Speaker 1: year mark, but I feel like it just feels a

493
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:10,320
Speaker 1: little fast.

494
00:22:10,359 --> 00:22:13,879
Speaker 3: But if you love someone, love them well.

495
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:16,760
Speaker 1: I think she was stunned by this because she immediately

496
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:20,359
Speaker 1: broke down crying. Sarah's a messy cryer even when she's happy,

497
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:22,639
Speaker 1: and my t shirt suffered for it. She still has

498
00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:24,400
Speaker 1: a few months left on her lease, so she's going

499
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,119
Speaker 1: to write it out until that's over, and then it

500
00:22:26,119 --> 00:22:28,120
Speaker 1: will move back into her house. She said that when

501
00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,240
Speaker 1: she moves in, she should sign some sort of rental

502
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:32,480
Speaker 1: agreement with me. I told her that I thought that

503
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:34,439
Speaker 1: was a bit over the top and months away, so

504
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:36,640
Speaker 1: let's just park that for right now. I won't say

505
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:39,119
Speaker 1: that it felt like we closed one chapter and start another,

506
00:22:39,119 --> 00:22:41,040
Speaker 1: because it's not quite like that. We've been going through

507
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:44,000
Speaker 1: a long process of sorting out our feelings, talking to

508
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:46,760
Speaker 1: each other, and on my part, really observing her actions.

509
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:48,399
Speaker 1: In fact, one of the things that was kind of

510
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:50,600
Speaker 1: a downer at the time is that Sarah said to me,

511
00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:52,760
Speaker 1: this is the best thing that's happened to me a

512
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:55,840
Speaker 1: long time. And I have like almost no one I

513
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:57,719
Speaker 1: can talk to about it. You see, it's not just

514
00:22:57,760 --> 00:23:00,440
Speaker 1: Evelyn that she's not talking to, but she's still not

515
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:03,439
Speaker 1: talking to her parents. Her father has made some overtures

516
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:05,479
Speaker 1: to stay in contact, but her and her mother are

517
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:09,000
Speaker 1: basically treating each other like they passed away. Wow. I

518
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:11,240
Speaker 1: have some pretty complicated feelings about this. On one hand,

519
00:23:11,400 --> 00:23:13,360
Speaker 1: I think her family has been a big problem for her,

520
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:15,720
Speaker 1: and even if she's working through it with a therapist.

521
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:18,720
Speaker 1: Neither of us think she's prepared to deal with them yet.

522
00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:20,960
Speaker 1: But on the other hand, I do wish that things

523
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:22,960
Speaker 1: didn't have to be like this for her. After all,

524
00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:25,720
Speaker 1: my family and hers seem like almost opposites, and I

525
00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:27,840
Speaker 1: guess I just wish she had been born into a

526
00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:30,000
Speaker 1: family like mine instead. There's a lot of really good

527
00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:32,479
Speaker 1: parts of family life and having good siblings and parents

528
00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 1: that Sarah has never really experienced, and this makes me

529
00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:38,240
Speaker 1: sad for her. But if there's a bright spot, it's

530
00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:41,280
Speaker 1: that my family never stopped caring about her. Even my parents,

531
00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:43,720
Speaker 1: I think, have been silently rooting for us to figure

532
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:45,320
Speaker 1: things out. By the way, if you want to figure

533
00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 1: out how to put more of us in your ear

534
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:52,200
Speaker 1: holes when you're working out, when you're cooking, when you're reading,

535
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 1: when you're at work, or whatever whatever you're doing, you

536
00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:59,800
Speaker 1: could listen to us by searching Okay Storytime on Apple podcast, Spotify,

537
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:01,399
Speaker 1: ever you get your podcasts, So put this in your

538
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,440
Speaker 1: ear holes. Twenty four to seven. But we got a

539
00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:04,680
Speaker 1: little bit more of an update, and I'm going to

540
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:06,920
Speaker 1: jump right into it. So that's where we are today.

541
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,000
Speaker 1: We're still working things out what probably feels like a

542
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:11,720
Speaker 1: glacial pace for readers here and Reddit, but that's just

543
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:14,320
Speaker 1: how life works sometimes. Overall, I would have to say

544
00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:17,639
Speaker 1: that despite appearances, our relationship is much stronger now than

545
00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 1: it was before I called off the marriage. We both

546
00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:22,240
Speaker 1: have a much deeper understanding of each other, and frankly,

547
00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:25,080
Speaker 1: Sarah has really demonstrated a lot of emotional growth in

548
00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:28,120
Speaker 1: the last year. Jesus, it's been a year, an entire year,

549
00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:30,080
Speaker 1: so it has been a year. It's surreal to me

550
00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:32,680
Speaker 1: how much time is flown by, but I'm glad to

551
00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 1: put most of it in the rear view mirror. Like

552
00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:37,320
Speaker 1: I said, I don't think we turned a corner. It's

553
00:24:37,320 --> 00:24:39,919
Speaker 1: been more gradual than that. But I definitely do feel like,

554
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:42,920
Speaker 1: after some soul searching, that we are back on track.

555
00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:45,919
Speaker 1: PS for anyone who cares, I plan on finishing the

556
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 1: Pagoda this year. There's still enough time to get it

557
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:50,960
Speaker 1: done before summer is over, and I'd like to have

558
00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:54,160
Speaker 1: at least a few fireside nights outside with my ex

559
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:59,240
Speaker 1: fiance and current girlfriend. And that is where this story ends.

560
00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:01,119
Speaker 1: But we do got all another story for you before

561
00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:04,320
Speaker 1: this episode ends. No more updates are updates.

562
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:05,960
Speaker 2: On this story reached the bottom of the barrel.

563
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:08,760
Speaker 1: Whoa, hey, it kind of ended good, you know, kind

564
00:25:08,760 --> 00:25:12,399
Speaker 1: of ended good. Foods here, oh sick? Oh maybe a

565
00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 1: little little food break, a little food bro. We also

566
00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:16,600
Speaker 1: put the air on too.

567
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:18,560
Speaker 3: You guys want to eat chat? Do you want to

568
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:18,960
Speaker 3: eat with us?

569
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:20,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, lunch break, it's a new segment.

570
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:23,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, lunch break. Oh let's talk any tea. I

571
00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:26,679
Speaker 3: don't think my parents are on here. I could I

572
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:30,919
Speaker 3: gave I gave John a bunch of like family drama

573
00:25:30,920 --> 00:25:32,359
Speaker 3: that was happening when I went back home.

574
00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:36,480
Speaker 2: Oh tee, yeah, I could talk about some of it, dude,

575
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:37,240
Speaker 2: whatever you got.

576
00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:43,960
Speaker 3: Number one, my great grandpa who's like ninety one wants

577
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:47,960
Speaker 3: to divorce his wife who's like eighty six.

578
00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:52,040
Speaker 1: Wow, why well, so, like, what what wife is? This

579
00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:53,040
Speaker 1: is this first wife?

580
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:55,920
Speaker 3: Uh? No, first wife died. This is his part time wife.

581
00:25:56,640 --> 00:25:59,680
Speaker 3: Part time meaning she only comes on the weekends whenever

582
00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:02,359
Speaker 3: COVID happened. He kind of called her and gave her

583
00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:04,680
Speaker 3: like a kind of a mean like don't be coming

584
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,720
Speaker 3: around here with that, like, don't get me sick, And

585
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:10,120
Speaker 3: it was I don't know, she kind of took hard.

586
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:14,520
Speaker 3: I would say, and hasn't really been hanging out with

587
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:16,600
Speaker 3: my grand grandpa since then.

588
00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:19,399
Speaker 1: His name's George, and I think they bang.

589
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:23,600
Speaker 3: They did, that's when they got married. Now heck, you know, man,

590
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:25,879
Speaker 3: this man, wait, how long have they got married Whenever

591
00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:31,080
Speaker 3: my mom was little her five, my mom's forty seven,

592
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:38,520
Speaker 3: five years later, probably like thirty years ish, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

593
00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:40,600
Speaker 1: But he just gives her time for a weekend wife.

594
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:43,720
Speaker 3: Well, she lives in like another like an hour away,

595
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:47,040
Speaker 3: and she has her own business, but she only gets

596
00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:50,640
Speaker 3: takes money from them in away. Well, they don't really talk.

597
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:52,800
Speaker 3: She kind of like visits for a little bit then leaves,

598
00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:55,240
Speaker 3: and he always gets like kind of pissy about it.

599
00:26:56,119 --> 00:26:58,159
Speaker 3: But over Christmas she came and I saw her and

600
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,679
Speaker 3: I was like, hey, life's great. Yea, she's loving it

601
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:05,560
Speaker 3: and she's talking to everybody everybody there, but does not

602
00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:08,440
Speaker 3: talk to George, and then leaves and does not talk

603
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:11,040
Speaker 3: to George. And George gives her like like a present.

604
00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:13,320
Speaker 3: He gives everybody in the family present. He also gave

605
00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:16,199
Speaker 3: Andreie a present, which has never has only happened to

606
00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:18,880
Speaker 3: one other girlfriend. But they didn't get as much as

607
00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:20,159
Speaker 3: she did, I know.

608
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:21,399
Speaker 1: So Andre's getting a special treatment.

609
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:24,720
Speaker 3: Then special treatment and the good like one of the

610
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:26,600
Speaker 3: girlfriends that treated me right back in the way, got

611
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 3: it not the latest ex but uh he she basically

612
00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:33,920
Speaker 3: got the money and left and didn't say bye to George,

613
00:27:34,080 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 3: And George was like, kind of like what, like she

614
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:38,240
Speaker 3: didn't say bye to me. Mom was like, well, you

615
00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:40,680
Speaker 3: could take away the good things out of this day

616
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:44,080
Speaker 3: and like kind of forget about like the bad things. Yeah,

617
00:27:44,359 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 3: that has been interesting. But he only wants to divorce

618
00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:49,720
Speaker 3: her so he can like clean out one of his rooms.

619
00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:51,159
Speaker 3: And I'm like, dude, you can just go ahead and

620
00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:52,800
Speaker 3: clean out one of your rooms in your house.

621
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:55,640
Speaker 1: You don't have to wait and divorce a room for her.

622
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:57,959
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like her bedroom where she like keeps her

623
00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:00,440
Speaker 3: stuff and everything. But I'm like, what do you one?

624
00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:02,240
Speaker 3: You're ninety one, what are you gonna do in there?

625
00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:04,720
Speaker 1: Dude? Games could get pinball machines.

626
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:06,119
Speaker 2: Dude, he could be he could start live streaming, he

627
00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:07,120
Speaker 2: could have his own chat man.

628
00:28:07,280 --> 00:28:09,200
Speaker 1: He going hinge.

629
00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:13,800
Speaker 4: Honestly, being being insanely old is low key like a

630
00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:17,399
Speaker 4: content hack. You just do something like that. Young people

631
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:19,439
Speaker 4: do that, they would not expect an old person to

632
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 4: do and you're there. H a secret admire ninety seven

633
00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:29,879
Speaker 4: donated five dollars. Sam, you're looking online, but you got.

634
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:32,000
Speaker 2: Me, baby. I can be your Mandy.

635
00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:33,800
Speaker 3: Oh man, Can I get a?

636
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:34,639
Speaker 2: Can I get a?

637
00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:39,720
Speaker 4: You might be Mandy right now? And he's about to

638
00:28:39,720 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 4: add the big and the wife next to it? Oh baby,

639
00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:46,360
Speaker 4: who's reading again?

640
00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:48,520
Speaker 1: Does it mean we're finishing up this episode?

641
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 2: We're finishing up the episode.

642
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:52,440
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam, your og host. Here. We're gonna get

643
00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:54,160
Speaker 1: back to the stories. But here's three minutes of ads

644
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:58,040
Speaker 1: from our sponsors. My boyfriend prioritizes his friends who discriminate

645
00:28:58,120 --> 00:29:01,080
Speaker 1: me and my daughter. Oh boy, it's long story because

646
00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:04,160
Speaker 1: I need to give some context, so please bear with me.

647
00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:07,880
Speaker 1: I am twenty two, a white Puerto Rican female this

648
00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:10,280
Speaker 1: will be mentioned later, and my boyfriend is twenty five white.

649
00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:12,560
Speaker 1: Also sorry for this word vomit. I'm not great at

650
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:15,040
Speaker 1: telling stories, so I hope this is understandable. Sorry if

651
00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:16,760
Speaker 1: I get sidetracked things in advance for the help. By

652
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:20,040
Speaker 1: the way, this comes from Manic Pixie xxx on the

653
00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:22,600
Speaker 1: r slash Okay Storytime sub wrote it. So I often

654
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:25,200
Speaker 1: visit my boyfriend and my three year old daughter even

655
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 1: has a room in his house. However, we live next

656
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 1: door to his friends. And while it is fantastic to

657
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:34,680
Speaker 1: live with friends when they are responsible and reasonable, helpful friends,

658
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:38,600
Speaker 1: my situation is the opposite. Oh dear, they are usually

659
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:41,480
Speaker 1: nice when they are by themselves. These are twenty six

660
00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:43,280
Speaker 1: and twenty eight white males. Sorry to mention race, but

661
00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 1: it'll come into play later. They typically have a revolving

662
00:29:45,640 --> 00:29:47,920
Speaker 1: door of tinder girls and dates coming over. So I

663
00:29:47,960 --> 00:29:51,000
Speaker 1: meet some who are ninety nine percent of the time white.

664
00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:53,960
Speaker 1: While I have pale skin, my naturally big and curly hair,

665
00:29:54,040 --> 00:29:57,000
Speaker 1: as well as mixed race black white and Puerto Rican daughter,

666
00:29:57,280 --> 00:30:00,600
Speaker 1: we stick out like a sore thumb. Still, my way

667
00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:03,160
Speaker 1: of talking is more on the Hispanic or a guest

668
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:06,240
Speaker 1: urban side. I guess I grew up with my mom

669
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:08,840
Speaker 1: whose first language was Spanish and a family who didn't

670
00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:11,720
Speaker 1: speak English well without a heavy accent. So anyway, I

671
00:30:11,760 --> 00:30:13,800
Speaker 1: meet new people, and in my attempt to make them

672
00:30:13,840 --> 00:30:15,960
Speaker 1: feel more comfortable with me, I try to do a

673
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:19,000
Speaker 1: white girl voice. As terrible as that sounds. I am

674
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:21,320
Speaker 1: the type of person who sits back and watches before

675
00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:24,400
Speaker 1: I interact. I see them joking about a brown band aid,

676
00:30:24,560 --> 00:30:28,120
Speaker 1: saying why they would buy the black people band aid,

677
00:30:28,320 --> 00:30:30,480
Speaker 1: and one of the girls laughs and says it is brown,

678
00:30:30,720 --> 00:30:34,040
Speaker 1: not black. Sea Haha, this will have meaning later, laughing

679
00:30:34,080 --> 00:30:36,040
Speaker 1: at her boyfriend twenty eight male, we're gonna do some

680
00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 1: icy territory here we are. I'm two twisted teas in

681
00:30:40,200 --> 00:30:42,600
Speaker 1: at this point. I don't often drink, so I'm feeling

682
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:46,000
Speaker 1: tipsy and start my valley girl voice because I unfortunately

683
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:49,200
Speaker 1: did feel uncomfortable around them, to which they responded by

684
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:51,600
Speaker 1: speaking in a valley girl voice back to mock me

685
00:30:52,040 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 1: whenever I was around, to which I ignored. So op

686
00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:59,280
Speaker 1: speaking in a valley girl voice to be just kind

687
00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:03,680
Speaker 1: of inclusive but like the other people. But the other

688
00:31:03,720 --> 00:31:06,520
Speaker 1: people like know she's putting on a voice, so they're

689
00:31:06,560 --> 00:31:07,320
Speaker 1: making fun of her.

690
00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 2: She like she's code switching.

691
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,800
Speaker 4: She's trying to like fit in, like fit in essentially,

692
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:15,760
Speaker 4: but it's like fitting in too much. Yeah, quote unquote,

693
00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:17,760
Speaker 4: and now they're like catching on to what she's doing

694
00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:18,760
Speaker 4: and mocking her with it.

695
00:31:19,040 --> 00:31:20,880
Speaker 1: Well, my daughter is playing with her friend. We are

696
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 1: all still playing UNO, and they conveniently forget to deal

697
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:26,240
Speaker 1: me in claiming they did, and I stuck it back

698
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:28,320
Speaker 1: under the stack, which I didn't it was very far

699
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:30,800
Speaker 1: away from it, and my boyfriend said, no, she never

700
00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:32,640
Speaker 1: got one, but it's okay, she can play with me.

701
00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:35,000
Speaker 1: I get a call from my sister and start talking

702
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:38,200
Speaker 1: still in a valley girl's voice, which the girls eat up.

703
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:40,960
Speaker 1: But I am a very anxious person and was wasted

704
00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:43,160
Speaker 1: and honestly would have rather been made fun of for

705
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 1: talking like them versus my authentic voice and way of speaking.

706
00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:48,920
Speaker 1: My sister immediately knew something was wrong and asked why

707
00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:51,240
Speaker 1: I spoke like that. Me and my boyfriend are significantly

708
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:53,320
Speaker 1: better looking than his friends and the girls they bring,

709
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:56,480
Speaker 1: so there's sometimes a bit of issues with the tender

710
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:58,920
Speaker 1: girls favoring to look at my boyfriend, which I ignore

711
00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:01,480
Speaker 1: because I'm confident into myself and I'm building a life

712
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:04,320
Speaker 1: for myself that will surpassed what they could all ever do.

713
00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:07,400
Speaker 1: And I'm an honor role university student. Yeah. I mean

714
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:10,920
Speaker 1: these sound like really whack people, And I'm like, is

715
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:13,400
Speaker 1: your boyfriend not a little whack if he's friends with

716
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:14,200
Speaker 1: all these whack people?

717
00:32:14,320 --> 00:32:16,880
Speaker 2: Yeah? So are they the tinder dates of his friends?

718
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:19,400
Speaker 1: I think the tender dates of his friends. Okay, that's

719
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:22,080
Speaker 1: where it sounds like, but like, I mean, why would

720
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:25,480
Speaker 1: you hang out with these people? Well, we've all had

721
00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:30,000
Speaker 1: one bad tinder date. Yeah, but I don't know. It

722
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:33,240
Speaker 1: feels a little whacky. But anyway, back to my sister.

723
00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:36,080
Speaker 1: I told her, and she said, I'm very disappointed you

724
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:39,000
Speaker 1: around people that make you feel uncomfortable and that your

725
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:41,400
Speaker 1: boyfriend continues to put you in a place like that. Sam,

726
00:32:41,920 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 1: this makes my anxiety worse. So I decide to go

727
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:47,080
Speaker 1: for a walk and my boyfriend's friend's parents are watching

728
00:32:47,080 --> 00:32:49,160
Speaker 1: my daughter and our friend. Before I left from my walk,

729
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:51,120
Speaker 1: I opened my notes app and told my boyfriend I

730
00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:53,880
Speaker 1: was very anxious. Can we go back home together and relax?

731
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:57,480
Speaker 1: He said no, So I understood he wanted to be

732
00:32:57,600 --> 00:33:00,520
Speaker 1: with his friends. Ming Wing says, what is a value voice?

733
00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:03,360
Speaker 1: It's like and so I texted him and let him

734
00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:05,840
Speaker 1: know I was going on a walk and asked if

735
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:08,400
Speaker 1: you could keep an eye out for my daughter like that?

736
00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:10,960
Speaker 1: Like that? So I texted him to let him know

737
00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:12,520
Speaker 1: I was going on a walk and asked him if

738
00:33:12,560 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 1: he could keep an eye out for my daughter, who

739
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:16,480
Speaker 1: at this point she thinks is her father.

740
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 2: Wait, that's a big detail.

741
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:20,920
Speaker 1: That's a huge detail.

742
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:26,120
Speaker 2: And I guess the daughter is there with them all.

743
00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:29,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, dude, there's a baby in the midst that's a

744
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:33,680
Speaker 1: huge detail. Baby, and that was just completely overlooked.

745
00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:34,400
Speaker 2: Yeah.

746
00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:36,200
Speaker 1: I've been with him for over two years, so that's

747
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:38,640
Speaker 1: most of her life. She's already being watched. But I

748
00:33:38,680 --> 00:33:40,600
Speaker 1: wanted to kerm she would looked at by him uh

749
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:44,360
Speaker 1: Op's boyfriend, to which he responded by saying, when you're back,

750
00:33:44,400 --> 00:33:49,320
Speaker 1: we can call my daughter Nina back, which led me

751
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:52,400
Speaker 1: to believe she was missing, only two blocks away and

752
00:33:52,520 --> 00:33:54,640
Speaker 1: hauling a to get back.

753
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,520
Speaker 2: So she's saying, like, oh, can you watch my daughter?

754
00:33:57,560 --> 00:34:00,160
Speaker 4: And he's like, oh yeah, like, we'll call her back

755
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 4: when you get back.

756
00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:03,760
Speaker 2: And she's like, well, why do you got to call it?

757
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:06,240
Speaker 2: Where's there right now? Like why you gotta call her?

758
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:07,600
Speaker 1: I called him while I was on the way, and

759
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:10,120
Speaker 1: he said I should call my friends and hung up,

760
00:34:10,400 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 1: which made me even more concerned, But he didn't care.

761
00:34:12,920 --> 00:34:14,399
Speaker 1: He was upset that I didn't want to hang out

762
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:15,920
Speaker 1: with his friends. All he would have had to do

763
00:34:16,040 --> 00:34:18,680
Speaker 1: was open the door five steps away from where he

764
00:34:18,760 --> 00:34:21,520
Speaker 1: was sitting to see my daughter, but he didn't. I

765
00:34:21,600 --> 00:34:23,879
Speaker 1: come back, literally in a full blown panic attack because

766
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:25,880
Speaker 1: she doesn't know where her daughter is, like if her

767
00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:28,560
Speaker 1: daughter's being taken care of. My daughter's fine, right where

768
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:30,400
Speaker 1: I left her. I get her and she goes to

769
00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:32,759
Speaker 1: her room to watch her iPad while I start to

770
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:35,759
Speaker 1: cry downstairs, not understanding why my boyfriend wouldn't give me

771
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:39,000
Speaker 1: confirmation that my daughter's okay. Okay, so really quick to

772
00:34:39,040 --> 00:34:43,359
Speaker 1: go back, so op, he's feeling anxious yep, and she's like, hey,

773
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:45,919
Speaker 1: can we leave? And the boyfriend's like I want to leave.

774
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:47,920
Speaker 1: He's like, okay, I'm just gonna leave for a little bit,

775
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:51,040
Speaker 1: like go down the street. Can you watch my daughter?

776
00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:55,319
Speaker 1: Boyfriend's like okay. And then later OPI asked, hey is

777
00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:57,399
Speaker 1: my daughter? Then he's like I don't know. And all

778
00:34:57,400 --> 00:34:59,160
Speaker 1: you had to do was like walk five steps to

779
00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:00,919
Speaker 1: see if she was act actually in the next room,

780
00:35:01,280 --> 00:35:04,319
Speaker 1: but he wouldn't do that. Yeah, and now she's having

781
00:35:04,360 --> 00:35:05,080
Speaker 1: like a panic attack.

782
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:06,759
Speaker 2: What a stupid thing to say.

783
00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:09,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's stupid, bro. My daughter is fine, right where

784
00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:10,880
Speaker 1: I left her. I get her and she goes to

785
00:35:10,880 --> 00:35:12,520
Speaker 1: a room to watch her iPad while I start to

786
00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:15,680
Speaker 1: cry downstairs, not understanding why my boyfriend wouldn't give me

787
00:35:15,719 --> 00:35:18,440
Speaker 1: confirmation that my daughter was okay. He told me it

788
00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:21,080
Speaker 1: was my fault because I should have confirmed with him

789
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:24,560
Speaker 1: in person before I left, and it wasn't his responsibility

790
00:35:24,560 --> 00:35:27,360
Speaker 1: to check on her for me. This completely shocked me.

791
00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:30,520
Speaker 1: He'd been so good to us and never acted like

792
00:35:30,560 --> 00:35:32,920
Speaker 1: my daughter was a burden. He helps me in almost

793
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:36,160
Speaker 1: every way with her. So am I the eye hole

794
00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:38,399
Speaker 1: thinking that he should have checked on my daughter for

795
00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:40,640
Speaker 1: me really quick? I think you shoul dump the boyfriend.

796
00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:44,840
Speaker 1: But also I don't know if putting father responsibility on

797
00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:50,160
Speaker 1: him is a good idea. One one, yeah, one because

798
00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:53,400
Speaker 1: there's like they're young, but also two, h for a

799
00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:57,240
Speaker 1: bunch of reasons. They're young. Two, he's like your boyfriend

800
00:35:57,239 --> 00:35:59,680
Speaker 1: and maybe he isn't ready for that responsibility. And three

801
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:02,759
Speaker 1: he seems like he sucks at given being given that responsibility.

802
00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:06,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's it's like she was kind of she was

803
00:36:06,280 --> 00:36:09,879
Speaker 4: basically assuming that he was taking that role.

804
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:10,400
Speaker 2: Yeah.

805
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:14,880
Speaker 4: Now, I think in this specific microcosm, didn't didn't she

806
00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:17,000
Speaker 4: say before she left, Hey, I'm just gonna go.

807
00:36:17,239 --> 00:36:18,920
Speaker 2: You don't want to leave, okay, cool, I'm gonna go

808
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:21,480
Speaker 2: for a walk. Just watch her. Yeah, right, So the

809
00:36:21,560 --> 00:36:23,920
Speaker 2: fact that she said I'm going for a walk. Just

810
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:29,360
Speaker 2: watch her. That's the time. If he said no, I don't.

811
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:31,080
Speaker 1: Feel like doing it, yeah he should have said it.

812
00:36:31,080 --> 00:36:32,440
Speaker 1: Then yeah, but he agreed to it.

813
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:33,399
Speaker 2: He agreed to it.

814
00:36:33,480 --> 00:36:37,400
Speaker 4: And then it's like, okay, if someone says watch this child.

815
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,520
Speaker 1: Regardless of you're a father figure or not, you just

816
00:36:40,560 --> 00:36:40,880
Speaker 1: do that.

817
00:36:41,239 --> 00:36:42,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. He's like, bro, you're trying to make a fight.

818
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:44,520
Speaker 2: It's like, I just want you to watch it for

819
00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:46,080
Speaker 2: ten minutes while I took a walk.

820
00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 4: So there's there's yeah, things going on both sides, but

821
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:51,120
Speaker 4: it's like, bro, you should have just watched the child

822
00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:52,760
Speaker 4: and don't be a freaking Idy'd be like, whoa.

823
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:54,360
Speaker 2: Out of the worst shoes.

824
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:55,359
Speaker 3: Maybe she ran away.

825
00:36:55,400 --> 00:36:56,760
Speaker 2: I'll go find her when you're back.

826
00:36:57,040 --> 00:37:00,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I think, Uh, I think, don't I

827
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:03,520
Speaker 1: feel like this might be you know, and and the

828
00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 1: relationship territory.

829
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 4: I think I think we're accidentally stumbling upon all of

830
00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:09,640
Speaker 4: the misalignment.

831
00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:10,839
Speaker 1: Yeah and leave it.

832
00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:12,680
Speaker 2: Hey, it's John ere og host here. We're gonna get

833
00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:14,239
Speaker 2: back to the stories. But here's a quick three minute

834
00:37:14,239 --> 00:37:15,480
Speaker 2: break of ass from our sponsors.

835
00:37:16,160 --> 00:37:17,839
Speaker 1: So am I able for thinking he should have checked

836
00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:19,560
Speaker 1: on my daughter? For me? The parents that were watching

837
00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:22,120
Speaker 1: my daughter, after seeing how Distrada was, offered to give

838
00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:24,720
Speaker 1: me their number, but I just said that's okay, thanks

839
00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:27,120
Speaker 1: and took my kid inside, wanting her to be safe

840
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:29,239
Speaker 1: with me. But I want to clarify she was never

841
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:33,239
Speaker 1: in danger. I was just scared as a loving mother, okay,

842
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:35,680
Speaker 1: I believe. So. She was already being watched by some

843
00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:39,399
Speaker 1: other parents and OPI just wanted the boyfriend to check

844
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:40,920
Speaker 1: and it was like, you know a few it's like

845
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:42,560
Speaker 1: five steps away basically.

846
00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:44,239
Speaker 2: And he's like like this, I'll go find her when

847
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:44,720
Speaker 2: you're back.

848
00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:48,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, like or like I'm not gonna leave. He told

849
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:50,200
Speaker 1: me it was my fault. I should have confirmed with

850
00:37:50,280 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 1: him in person before I left, and it wasn't my

851
00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:54,719
Speaker 1: response and it wasn't his responsibility to check on her

852
00:37:54,760 --> 00:37:57,560
Speaker 1: for me. This completely shocked me because he's been so

853
00:37:57,600 --> 00:37:59,480
Speaker 1: good to us and never acted like my daughter was

854
00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:01,640
Speaker 1: a burden. He helps me in almost every way with her,

855
00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:03,560
Speaker 1: So I might ask, am I the a hole for

856
00:38:04,080 --> 00:38:05,759
Speaker 1: thinking he should have checked on my daughter for me?

857
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:08,120
Speaker 1: The parents that were watching my daughter, after seeing how

858
00:38:08,160 --> 00:38:10,360
Speaker 1: distraught I was, offer to give me their number, but

859
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:13,400
Speaker 1: I just said that's okay. Thanks, and took my kid inside,

860
00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:15,319
Speaker 1: wanting her to be safe with me. But I would

861
00:38:15,360 --> 00:38:17,400
Speaker 1: like to clarify she was never in danger. I was

862
00:38:17,440 --> 00:38:20,080
Speaker 1: just scared. As a loving mother, my daughter is everything

863
00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:21,959
Speaker 1: to me. I would have brought her on the walk

864
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:23,719
Speaker 1: with me, but it was dark, so I didn't want

865
00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:25,879
Speaker 1: I didn't feel that that was safe. I didn't plan

866
00:38:25,920 --> 00:38:29,319
Speaker 1: on going far anyway. My boyfriend storms out, adamant it

867
00:38:29,400 --> 00:38:31,960
Speaker 1: was my fault. He returns five minutes later, putting on

868
00:38:31,960 --> 00:38:33,560
Speaker 1: his shoes and saying he will go to the bar.

869
00:38:33,840 --> 00:38:36,719
Speaker 1: Mind you, I'm still hysterical crying over the scare with

870
00:38:36,760 --> 00:38:39,320
Speaker 1: my daughter. I start to have a full blown panic attack,

871
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:41,719
Speaker 1: crying and I can't breathe. He stays to comfort me

872
00:38:41,840 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 1: and make sure I'm okay. He doesn't end up going

873
00:38:43,960 --> 00:38:45,920
Speaker 1: to the bar and tells me I guilted him into

874
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:48,359
Speaker 1: staying still. He was telling me over and over it

875
00:38:48,400 --> 00:38:50,480
Speaker 1: was my fault and if something did happen to her,

876
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:52,799
Speaker 1: it would be my fault she which is what set

877
00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:55,320
Speaker 1: me off because he was right. I just assume he

878
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:57,759
Speaker 1: would have checked on her since he always has. And

879
00:38:57,840 --> 00:38:59,880
Speaker 1: also going to the bar with these people after an

880
00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:02,520
Speaker 1: argument sounded weird to me considering I'm not allowed to

881
00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:04,960
Speaker 1: go to bars because he says I'm too pretty. It

882
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:08,719
Speaker 1: will be hit on, and then the next.

883
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:11,399
Speaker 4: Sentence and then the next sentence is a classic like oh,

884
00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:12,719
Speaker 4: he's so perfect, but but.

885
00:39:12,760 --> 00:39:16,640
Speaker 1: He's almost a perfect boyfriend. I'm young, so that social

886
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:19,719
Speaker 1: media would bother me. Lol. He does not follow any

887
00:39:19,760 --> 00:39:22,399
Speaker 1: girls but me, and we are barely on social media,

888
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:24,840
Speaker 1: which I love and it's hard to find these days.

889
00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:27,839
Speaker 3: Okay, just because he's trying to isolate you doesn't mean

890
00:39:27,880 --> 00:39:29,560
Speaker 3: he hasn't already isolated himself.

891
00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:31,880
Speaker 1: Still, I don't want to he hated, and tell him

892
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:36,000
Speaker 1: to go. He doesn't. Oh God, really just pulled out

893
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:39,160
Speaker 1: his own mic. He was serious, guys, he says, and

894
00:39:39,239 --> 00:39:41,640
Speaker 1: tells me how he loves my daughter and me and

895
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:44,200
Speaker 1: he would always want to protect us, which then why

896
00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:46,560
Speaker 1: couldn't you look out the door? Still, he told me

897
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:48,640
Speaker 1: I needed to be nicer around his friends. I told

898
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:50,920
Speaker 1: him I didn't feel comfortable as the only Hispanic in

899
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:52,920
Speaker 1: a group of the whitest of the white, and I

900
00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:55,880
Speaker 1: was wrong for saying that. And he took some air saying,

901
00:39:56,360 --> 00:39:59,040
Speaker 1: don't play the race card because I'm paler than him.

902
00:39:59,160 --> 00:40:01,880
Speaker 1: He indeed he loves the sun, but they asked me

903
00:40:01,960 --> 00:40:04,600
Speaker 1: what a Jamaican song was saying, I guess they thought

904
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:06,520
Speaker 1: it was Spanish. One of the friends said, don't be

905
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 1: racist in response to that to another friend. So it's

906
00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:12,799
Speaker 1: hard not to think it's about me being hispanic at

907
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:15,840
Speaker 1: least a bit. And I'm sure that's not their issue

908
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:18,600
Speaker 1: with me, and that they are just insensitive and want

909
00:40:18,600 --> 00:40:20,560
Speaker 1: to bother me. But then he starts to tell me

910
00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:23,640
Speaker 1: ways that he stands up for us, like when his

911
00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:27,040
Speaker 1: friends and their girlfriend started saying the little black girl

912
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:29,640
Speaker 1: randomly as a joke. He told them to stop and

913
00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:32,520
Speaker 1: that she's mixed and it's irrelevant and she shouldn't have

914
00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:35,279
Speaker 1: been brought up. I was not there to hear that,

915
00:40:35,320 --> 00:40:37,400
Speaker 1: and neither was my daughter, which is where the brown

916
00:40:37,440 --> 00:40:39,959
Speaker 1: band aid joke came about my boyfriend saying my daughter

917
00:40:40,000 --> 00:40:42,840
Speaker 1: wasn't black, she was mixed. These are his lifelong friends,

918
00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:44,680
Speaker 1: so he made it clear I can't be mad at

919
00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:46,960
Speaker 1: him for hanging out with them, but he is moving.

920
00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 1: So am I the ahole for expecting him to check

921
00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:51,720
Speaker 1: out my daughter? And should I even be with him anymore?

922
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:54,680
Speaker 1: I don't think my boyfriend is racist in any way. However,

923
00:40:54,960 --> 00:40:57,120
Speaker 1: my friends told me I should still be concerned with

924
00:40:57,160 --> 00:40:59,879
Speaker 1: his friend's comfort in talking about my daughter like that

925
00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:02,400
Speaker 1: after years of dating. He said, they must have been

926
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:04,640
Speaker 1: trying to look tough for their tendi dates since my

927
00:41:04,680 --> 00:41:07,160
Speaker 1: boyfriend is much bigger than them and they were all drinking.

928
00:41:07,480 --> 00:41:10,000
Speaker 1: And I am a very pale Puerto Rican. They call

929
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:12,880
Speaker 1: me la ringa, So I don't worry too much about

930
00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:15,399
Speaker 1: things like that, but now I feel like I have

931
00:41:15,480 --> 00:41:17,760
Speaker 1: to for my daughter. So it's a good mom should

932
00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:19,640
Speaker 1: I leave him. I love him very much and don't

933
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:21,720
Speaker 1: want that to happen. We got so close so fast,

934
00:41:21,760 --> 00:41:25,000
Speaker 1: but I need to think that my daughter is first. Also,

935
00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:26,640
Speaker 1: when you stay with a man with friends like that,

936
00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:30,720
Speaker 1: I probably wouldn't, but I would always stay with us.

937
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:33,759
Speaker 1: Listening on our podcast, okay, storytime. You can search it

938
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:35,800
Speaker 1: up anyway where we get podcasts and that way you

939
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:41,120
Speaker 1: can listen when you're doing anything. But on this story, yeah,

940
00:41:41,160 --> 00:41:42,680
Speaker 1: I mean, he sounds like a poopy bag.

941
00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:46,719
Speaker 4: He has so many, so many layers of reasons of

942
00:41:46,800 --> 00:41:50,080
Speaker 4: why you should leave you should leave him, and like

943
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:51,680
Speaker 4: so many reasons.

944
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:54,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, so many reasons, so many reasons. I think you

945
00:41:54,640 --> 00:41:57,200
Speaker 1: should leave him. But let's see what Opie says. I

946
00:41:57,239 --> 00:41:58,880
Speaker 1: want to take my daughter around him again, since she

947
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:01,800
Speaker 1: was referred to as little black girl as an insult.

948
00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:03,759
Speaker 1: I also think it is weird that her being black

949
00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:05,960
Speaker 1: would be a bad thing. My daughter is not dark

950
00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:08,319
Speaker 1: skin either, so the whole situation feels so weird to

951
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:10,680
Speaker 1: me that I would even have to think about these

952
00:42:10,719 --> 00:42:13,279
Speaker 1: things even if she was dark skinned. I don't see

953
00:42:13,320 --> 00:42:16,160
Speaker 1: the issue or why sane people would ever bring it

954
00:42:16,239 --> 00:42:18,600
Speaker 1: up as a joke. My boyfriend didn't tell me to

955
00:42:18,680 --> 00:42:21,719
Speaker 1: the extent or with much context on context, and I

956
00:42:21,760 --> 00:42:24,640
Speaker 1: didn't ask. It wasn't enjoyable to me. Thanks for reading.

957
00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:26,160
Speaker 1: If you made it this far, I would love the

958
00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:28,640
Speaker 1: help also throughout this mark. I'm a big fan and

959
00:42:28,719 --> 00:42:31,200
Speaker 1: love your podcast. I would love to hear your opinion

960
00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:33,960
Speaker 1: since I enjoy your honesty and fair judgment.

961
00:42:34,120 --> 00:42:35,799
Speaker 2: Oh we got a fan.

962
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:39,320
Speaker 1: We got a fan, dude, we love that leave leave

963
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:42,200
Speaker 1: he doesn't he doesn't sound like a good guy. Yeah,

964
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:43,520
Speaker 1: he does not sound like a good guy. I need

965
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:44,799
Speaker 1: to do what's best for you and your daughter.

966
00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:49,600
Speaker 4: He's so controlling and you know, just again a million reasons,

967
00:42:49,680 --> 00:42:52,719
Speaker 4: but him trying to be like, Oh why I do

968
00:42:52,800 --> 00:42:55,360
Speaker 4: all of this and that, and I think, I think truly. Also,

969
00:42:55,400 --> 00:43:00,200
Speaker 4: it's like a lesson in trying to find alignment. Know,

970
00:43:00,440 --> 00:43:04,000
Speaker 4: is he a criminal for not wanting to be a

971
00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:08,719
Speaker 4: dad yet? No, But that's something that like you got

972
00:43:08,760 --> 00:43:10,879
Speaker 4: to figure out and like work out, like, Okay, yeah,

973
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:13,200
Speaker 4: is he really you know, if he keeps going down

974
00:43:13,239 --> 00:43:16,120
Speaker 4: the road two years in, well eventually one would presume

975
00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:18,480
Speaker 4: he would be a dad. So it's like, okay, figuring

976
00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:20,560
Speaker 4: out if he is actually once and.

977
00:43:20,600 --> 00:43:21,200
Speaker 2: Is ready for that?

978
00:43:21,360 --> 00:43:23,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, And also like think about your daughter, Like is

979
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:26,719
Speaker 1: this guy and his friends a good influence on your daughter?

980
00:43:27,040 --> 00:43:31,040
Speaker 1: So like I really don't think so, but I would

981
00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 1: love to know what y'all think. Put your answers in

982
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:37,800
Speaker 1: the commons, blow let us know. But that is where

983
00:43:38,080 --> 00:43:40,320
Speaker 1: this story and this episode ends.

984
00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:41,040
Speaker 2: That's true.

985
00:43:41,080 --> 00:43:41,680
Speaker 1: It was a doozy.

986
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:43,120
Speaker 2: It's quite a douzy.

987
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:45,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, So if you love us, make sure to subscribe.

988
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:47,200
Speaker 2: We love you and Sorrow