1
00:00:01,320 --> 00:00:04,600
Speaker 1: Hey, lady, is doctor dim here. If you like this

2
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:07,240
Speaker 1: show and you want to make your own, let me

3
00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:10,840
Speaker 1: tell you about the free platform Anchor. It's a creation

4
00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,800
Speaker 1: tool that allows you to record and edit your podcast

5
00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:17,280
Speaker 1: right from your phone or computer. You can add songs

6
00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,000
Speaker 1: from Spotify and create any type of content that you

7
00:00:21,079 --> 00:00:24,400
Speaker 1: are looking for. Anchor will distribute it all for you

8
00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:28,440
Speaker 1: so it can be heard on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and more.

9
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,040
Speaker 1: Download the free Anchor app or go to anchor dot

10
00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:33,800
Speaker 1: fm to get started.

11
00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:38,239
Speaker 2: On this week's episode. In her Space, So.

12
00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:40,479
Speaker 3: My biggest fiver was pretty huge, and I called her

13
00:00:40,520 --> 00:00:43,559
Speaker 3: Felicia just because I could always feel her like rather

14
00:00:43,680 --> 00:00:46,000
Speaker 3: for my surgery, I had a by Felicia party like

15
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:49,720
Speaker 3: where I had I feel like, you know, one of

16
00:00:49,720 --> 00:00:51,720
Speaker 3: my friends that you have to celebrate every moment in

17
00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:52,440
Speaker 3: your life like.

18
00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:57,880
Speaker 1: Welcome to her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting women

19
00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:03,000
Speaker 1: like you. Where You're doctor Dominique Brussard, a college professor

20
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:04,560
Speaker 1: and psychologist.

21
00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:07,880
Speaker 2: And Terry Lomax, a techie and motivational speaker. In a

22
00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:12,080
Speaker 2: world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, Please

23
00:01:12,200 --> 00:01:16,240
Speaker 2: join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from

24
00:01:16,280 --> 00:01:19,280
Speaker 2: fibroids to fake friends and create a safe space where

25
00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:20,360
Speaker 2: black women can just.

26
00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:26,720
Speaker 1: Be okay, lady. So today you are in for a

27
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:30,840
Speaker 1: special treat. If you have been following us for a moment,

28
00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:34,800
Speaker 1: then you know that one of our topic that we

29
00:01:34,959 --> 00:01:39,640
Speaker 1: mentioned is fibroids. So today we are going to be

30
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:45,360
Speaker 1: diving into not just fibroids, but overall gynecological health. And

31
00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,520
Speaker 1: we have a guest speaker. Doctor Joy Cooper is a

32
00:01:48,560 --> 00:01:54,400
Speaker 1: Philadelphia native and an obstetrician gynecologist at Highland Hospital in Oakland, California.

33
00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:59,200
Speaker 1: She completed residency at the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania.

34
00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:03,800
Speaker 1: She earned her MD from Howard University, completed a master's

35
00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:08,720
Speaker 1: and sexually transmitted Infections in HIV at University College of London,

36
00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:13,200
Speaker 1: London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, and earned an

37
00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:17,320
Speaker 1: ab An African and African American Studies at Harvard College.

38
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:21,120
Speaker 1: When she is not on call, catching babies or traveling

39
00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:24,240
Speaker 1: the globe, she is fulfilling her mission to impact women

40
00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:28,480
Speaker 1: of the African diaspora through her organization, Daughters of the

41
00:02:28,520 --> 00:02:32,640
Speaker 1: Diaspora Incorporated and a new startup called Culture Care.

42
00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:35,320
Speaker 3: Welcome. Doctor Joy thank you.

43
00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:39,960
Speaker 1: I mean that that introduction was just I mean, wow,

44
00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:44,639
Speaker 1: your background, you are ready for this, like you are

45
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:47,679
Speaker 1: in this. You are clearly passionate about this.

46
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:50,360
Speaker 3: I think the key thing is I'm from Philly, and

47
00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:54,919
Speaker 3: I think that's colored my whole experience. Basically, Oh.

48
00:02:56,200 --> 00:02:58,240
Speaker 2: On the line, doctor Joy, I'm from Southwest, but.

49
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,760
Speaker 3: I look at Southwest while I was in residency. I

50
00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:08,520
Speaker 3: love my grandma. I got the Southwest West flavor. Serious a,

51
00:03:09,280 --> 00:03:09,720
Speaker 3: I love it.

52
00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:11,640
Speaker 2: I love it is anywhere near Penrose.

53
00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:14,760
Speaker 3: She's just curious Penrose. Yeah, Conic Clos. I was at

54
00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:18,840
Speaker 3: seventy third and on what so my girl, Oh my goodness.

55
00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:24,400
Speaker 2: Okay, we'll have a Philly talk after the after the episode.

56
00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:27,400
Speaker 1: So now we're going to dive into our quote of

57
00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:31,800
Speaker 1: the day. It's by Bell Hooks where she says, I

58
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:35,120
Speaker 1: think the number one thing black women and all black

59
00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:40,560
Speaker 1: people should be paying attention to is our health. And

60
00:03:40,600 --> 00:03:43,320
Speaker 1: so that is our focus for today is and this

61
00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:47,880
Speaker 1: quote actually came from a larger piece where Bell Hooks

62
00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:53,560
Speaker 1: was speaking about black women and our reproductive health. One

63
00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:58,480
Speaker 1: of the biggest issues in black women's reproductive health, at

64
00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:02,880
Speaker 1: least from what I've seen, is fibroids. I have my

65
00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:06,880
Speaker 1: own personal experience with fibroids, but doctor Joy, can you

66
00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:10,960
Speaker 1: talk to us a little bit about what are fibroids

67
00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:14,880
Speaker 1: and what are some of the signs and symptoms that

68
00:04:15,120 --> 00:04:18,320
Speaker 1: are particularly prevalent with African American worlds.

69
00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:19,839
Speaker 3: I just have to say the fact that you started

70
00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:23,159
Speaker 3: with a bell Hooks that said that, like, it's just

71
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:26,760
Speaker 3: so impactful, because so many times in my career, in

72
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:28,839
Speaker 3: my road to medicine, I've been like, oh, it's just

73
00:04:28,839 --> 00:04:31,880
Speaker 3: been an African American studies, like Professor I always think that,

74
00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:36,160
Speaker 3: But hearing bell Hooks validate my career feels so good.

75
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:40,200
Speaker 3: So thank you for that. So fibroids that basically I

76
00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,320
Speaker 3: described them as like little balls of muscle that are

77
00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:46,839
Speaker 3: just like really disorganized. So the whole uterus, the main

78
00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:49,240
Speaker 3: part of the uterus is a muscle, So the inner

79
00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:51,240
Speaker 3: part of them of the uterus is a muscle. And

80
00:04:51,279 --> 00:04:55,279
Speaker 3: so essentially they're like these little muscle balls that form

81
00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:58,920
Speaker 3: that we don't know what causes them. They come from nowhere.

82
00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:01,159
Speaker 3: We know they are fed by hormones in our body,

83
00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:05,960
Speaker 3: mostly estrogen, but they form and they can grow big. Now,

84
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:08,360
Speaker 3: the hard part was African American women or Black women.

85
00:05:08,360 --> 00:05:10,240
Speaker 3: Really I should stay with the African diaspora because I've

86
00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:14,440
Speaker 3: encountered five words both on the continent and here is

87
00:05:14,520 --> 00:05:18,400
Speaker 3: that basically, our sen to be larger, we tend to

88
00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:21,240
Speaker 3: be more symptomatic, We tend to need surgery more, We

89
00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:25,080
Speaker 3: tend to have a rebound of symptoms and five words

90
00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:29,080
Speaker 3: after surgery pretty quickly. So fib words is a really

91
00:05:29,160 --> 00:05:32,280
Speaker 3: big cost to our community because if you imagine the

92
00:05:32,279 --> 00:05:35,800
Speaker 3: amount of fertility impact, I have such a good impact,

93
00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:39,600
Speaker 3: because fibords can impact pregnancies and your wellness and you're

94
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:43,440
Speaker 3: just feeling well during pregnancy and sometimes even need for

95
00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:46,000
Speaker 3: c sections and such. It definitely has a lot of

96
00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:48,640
Speaker 3: weight in our community because we get them worse. And

97
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:51,080
Speaker 3: so I think the hard part and what I've been

98
00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:54,640
Speaker 3: trying to do is really like develop more data specifically

99
00:05:54,680 --> 00:05:57,640
Speaker 3: for women of color about five words in our community,

100
00:05:57,640 --> 00:06:00,480
Speaker 3: because if you read a general pamphlet, thing like ohbirds,

101
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:03,400
Speaker 3: no big deal, But for us, we tend to have

102
00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:05,880
Speaker 3: more symptoms, So we tend to have heavier bleeding, which

103
00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:09,040
Speaker 3: is one of the main stays of fiboards. Sometimes if

104
00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:11,320
Speaker 3: they are really big, you'll start feeling bloated, or feel

105
00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:13,919
Speaker 3: like you're kind of pregnant and it's like, why are

106
00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:16,680
Speaker 3: my pants are not fitting so well? You might have pain.

107
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:20,000
Speaker 3: Some women do have pain associated with it as well

108
00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:23,359
Speaker 3: as pressure, like going to the bathroom, really like not

109
00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,920
Speaker 3: making it to the bathroom, having to go more often,

110
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:28,400
Speaker 3: just because sometimes the unus is right in front of

111
00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:30,240
Speaker 3: the bladder, so you kind of like turn into like

112
00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:32,040
Speaker 3: a pregnant woman where you're going to the bathroom all

113
00:06:32,080 --> 00:06:33,880
Speaker 3: the time. So some of those those are some of

114
00:06:33,880 --> 00:06:36,240
Speaker 3: the main science and symptoms that most women come in

115
00:06:36,320 --> 00:06:37,840
Speaker 3: complaining of and.

116
00:06:37,839 --> 00:06:39,760
Speaker 2: Doctor joy If a woman, let's say she goes to

117
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,680
Speaker 2: the doctor she's having these symptoms that she finds out, wow,

118
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:43,680
Speaker 2: I have fibroids.

119
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:45,600
Speaker 3: What's the typical next step for a.

120
00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:47,200
Speaker 2: Women in that journey. I know Dom's going to share

121
00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:48,880
Speaker 2: a bit about her story as well, but what is

122
00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:52,159
Speaker 2: like the first thing one can do. I haven't experienced it,

123
00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:54,400
Speaker 2: but I can only imagine that someone might feel lonely

124
00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:55,960
Speaker 2: or feel as though they don't know where to go

125
00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:58,480
Speaker 2: if they're just getting this new diagnosis.

126
00:06:58,480 --> 00:06:59,960
Speaker 3: I think the first thing to do is to look

127
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:02,560
Speaker 3: n word and ask what are my goals? What do

128
00:07:02,600 --> 00:07:05,400
Speaker 3: I want to do. I really talked a lot like

129
00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:08,440
Speaker 3: I've discovered as an obgyn, but I guess the last

130
00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:11,000
Speaker 3: two years I've been like a full attending, not just

131
00:07:11,040 --> 00:07:13,640
Speaker 3: in training. And my whole point of view is that

132
00:07:14,160 --> 00:07:17,080
Speaker 3: dynacology and obsetrics is really about quality of life. A

133
00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:18,880
Speaker 3: lot of it will not kill you. Most of it

134
00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:20,920
Speaker 3: is about how can you live your best life? And

135
00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:23,440
Speaker 3: so if the fib words are affecting your quality of life,

136
00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:26,520
Speaker 3: your ability to you know, we're white all the time,

137
00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:29,160
Speaker 3: your ability to to like but end up your pants

138
00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,600
Speaker 3: and you know, like not have to like you know,

139
00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:33,960
Speaker 3: hydra belly and you know all these different things and

140
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:37,280
Speaker 3: you know we're different up really fitting clothes. You know,

141
00:07:37,480 --> 00:07:39,320
Speaker 3: that's the main thing you want to ask yourself. And

142
00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,480
Speaker 3: I have my own, like you know, fireboards story. I

143
00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:45,600
Speaker 3: basically was diagnosed about twenty fourteen and really didn't need

144
00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:48,040
Speaker 3: surgery probably until about twenty sixteen because I didn't have

145
00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:50,080
Speaker 3: symptoms and my fibers are pretty large. But when I

146
00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:52,440
Speaker 3: found it, but I didn't have symptoms. And I think

147
00:07:52,480 --> 00:07:54,400
Speaker 3: the main thing is if you are having symptoms or not.

148
00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:56,680
Speaker 3: So if you're not having symptoms, really there's not that

149
00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:59,600
Speaker 3: much to do unless you're looking to get pregnant in

150
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:02,000
Speaker 3: the next like six months to a year, because then

151
00:08:02,320 --> 00:08:05,040
Speaker 3: that kind of colors your experience. But that's why you

152
00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:07,680
Speaker 3: have to look inward first and say, am I having symptoms?

153
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:10,360
Speaker 3: What do I want to do about my fertility? Am

154
00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:11,720
Speaker 3: I living my best life? Basically?

155
00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:15,600
Speaker 1: And so let's say that you do decide that your

156
00:08:15,680 --> 00:08:19,320
Speaker 1: quality of life is being impacted. Like for me personally,

157
00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:24,280
Speaker 1: what initially prompted me to make like changes was my

158
00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:28,240
Speaker 1: quality of life was being impacted. My god of collegists

159
00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:30,840
Speaker 1: at the time pointed out that my belly was protruding

160
00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:33,600
Speaker 1: in a way that resembled a woman who was three

161
00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:37,000
Speaker 1: or four months pregnant, and like you mentioned, like your

162
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,840
Speaker 1: pants not fitting well and having to go to the

163
00:08:39,880 --> 00:08:43,800
Speaker 1: bathroom all the time, like those things. And one of

164
00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:48,640
Speaker 1: the things is for some women, sex can be impacted.

165
00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:54,200
Speaker 1: And so for me it was a decision of Okay,

166
00:08:55,040 --> 00:08:57,960
Speaker 1: I don't necessarily want surgery right away. And so then

167
00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,199
Speaker 1: I started doing all this research and I was like,

168
00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:02,120
Speaker 1: all right, I'm diving in and figuring out like what

169
00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:04,880
Speaker 1: can I do? And there was all these things out

170
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:11,160
Speaker 1: there about diet change and no soy and being pescatarian

171
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:15,160
Speaker 1: and I tried all of that and cut sugar, and

172
00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:20,520
Speaker 1: so what is your medical take on making those diet

173
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:23,600
Speaker 1: changes before going into the route of circe.

174
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:25,280
Speaker 3: I think the key thing is that I don't think

175
00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:27,720
Speaker 3: there's any diet change that's going to shrink your fibords.

176
00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:30,640
Speaker 3: There's nothing you can do to like, once they are

177
00:09:30,679 --> 00:09:33,000
Speaker 3: where they are and they're causing their problems their problem,

178
00:09:33,320 --> 00:09:35,280
Speaker 3: you know, like, there's really nothing you can do to

179
00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:37,800
Speaker 3: kind of reverse that. That's just my personal opinion. I

180
00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:39,240
Speaker 3: know there are people out there who will on their

181
00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:41,760
Speaker 3: Facebook accounts say, oh, it was there, then it wasn't there.

182
00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:43,640
Speaker 3: All these different things have the time, a lot of

183
00:09:43,640 --> 00:09:47,000
Speaker 3: peopleple think they're talking about firebords and then it's actually assists,

184
00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:49,840
Speaker 3: and sists do go away on their own, so, you know,

185
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:54,559
Speaker 3: be just really reluctant to trust everybody's testimony. But honestly,

186
00:09:54,600 --> 00:09:57,319
Speaker 3: I think it's hard. I think fibers are difficult because

187
00:09:57,400 --> 00:10:00,200
Speaker 3: you know, it's kind of like I hate to liking

188
00:10:00,240 --> 00:10:02,679
Speaker 3: it to cancer because it's not, thank God, but it is.

189
00:10:02,720 --> 00:10:04,920
Speaker 3: It's a tumor. And so when you have a tumor

190
00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:06,560
Speaker 3: in the way, you know, the hard part for me

191
00:10:06,679 --> 00:10:08,720
Speaker 3: is I am a trained surgeon. If you have a tumor,

192
00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:10,480
Speaker 3: in a way, you cut it out basically. And so

193
00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:13,200
Speaker 3: it's kind of hard because you know, I even with

194
00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:15,600
Speaker 3: my own battle like you know, when I didn't have symptoms,

195
00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:17,520
Speaker 3: it was fun. I was living with my fireboids. But

196
00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:19,679
Speaker 3: when I got to the point where you were, it

197
00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:21,960
Speaker 3: was like bothering me. It was like, oh my gosh,

198
00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:24,080
Speaker 3: get this out of me now. Because of my own

199
00:10:24,280 --> 00:10:27,120
Speaker 3: like personal issues, I was in residency, I was in

200
00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:29,960
Speaker 3: training trying to graduate. I had to delay it for

201
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:33,199
Speaker 3: two years, and sometimes I realized how much that impacted

202
00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:35,200
Speaker 3: me by like holding onto this and there was no

203
00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:37,120
Speaker 3: you know, like I stopped eating soy, I stopped doing

204
00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:39,160
Speaker 3: all those things. But by the time you have like

205
00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:41,720
Speaker 3: a large like fireboid load, it's very hard to like,

206
00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:44,600
Speaker 3: you know, reverse you know, what's already been done. The

207
00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:47,360
Speaker 3: main thing that can kind of like shrink them temporarily

208
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:50,960
Speaker 3: is something called lupron, which is a medication that is

209
00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:53,719
Speaker 3: it mimics a hormone in the brain called g r

210
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:56,520
Speaker 3: n g n r H. I was spared trying to

211
00:10:56,520 --> 00:10:58,840
Speaker 3: like articulate that over this because I will not sound

212
00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:03,240
Speaker 3: it out right now, so Billy. But basically it basically

213
00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:05,880
Speaker 3: kind of puts you into temporary menopause, and that actually

214
00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:09,120
Speaker 3: does shrink your fiboords. So your ovaries are functioning, and

215
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:11,040
Speaker 3: so as long as you have ovarys that are in

216
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,560
Speaker 3: a cycle, they're going to feed the fireboords to grow

217
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:16,400
Speaker 3: because you have estrogen half of your cycle every month,

218
00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:19,439
Speaker 3: and that is definitely like feeding the firebords to maintain,

219
00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:22,040
Speaker 3: if not make them grow. So the absence of estrogen

220
00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:24,800
Speaker 3: and cutting that out through this like brain hormone that

221
00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:26,719
Speaker 3: kind of shuts off your ovaries and puts them to

222
00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:29,720
Speaker 3: sleep temporarily. That kind of does like make a shrink.

223
00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:31,599
Speaker 3: But other than that should have that. There aren't a

224
00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:33,560
Speaker 3: lot of things that will There's not a lot of

225
00:11:33,559 --> 00:11:35,439
Speaker 3: diet changes or something you can do to just shrink

226
00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:38,040
Speaker 3: your fibroids. And that's a reversible change.

227
00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:43,839
Speaker 1: Too, okay, and so what so you said it's not

228
00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:47,800
Speaker 1: gonna shrink them. But let's say because one of the

229
00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:51,280
Speaker 1: things that I eventually did have the surgery, and so

230
00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:54,960
Speaker 1: then after you've had the surgery, would those diet changes

231
00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:59,320
Speaker 1: be recommended to prevent more fibroids from development.

232
00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:00,680
Speaker 3: I mean, I think at the end of the day,

233
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:03,040
Speaker 3: I think it may. I mean, whatever makes you feel

234
00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:05,520
Speaker 3: like you're doing something, so I will. I admit I

235
00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:07,600
Speaker 3: do not drink soy milk anymore. I used to be

236
00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:10,360
Speaker 3: a soy milk theme back in college, and I stopped

237
00:12:10,400 --> 00:12:13,160
Speaker 3: drinking soy milk. You know, I've made some diet changes,

238
00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:15,960
Speaker 3: but you know, sometimes I kind of feel like you know,

239
00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:19,040
Speaker 3: your DNA wins and the only thing you know some

240
00:12:19,240 --> 00:12:20,720
Speaker 3: you know, like I know there are some doctors who

241
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:22,640
Speaker 3: don't believe like there is a gene for black, and

242
00:12:22,720 --> 00:12:25,240
Speaker 3: of course there isn't. However, we know how black people

243
00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:28,280
Speaker 3: arrived in America. We came from West Africa. And after

244
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:32,080
Speaker 3: operating in West Africa, I was in a small town

245
00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:35,120
Speaker 3: named of pom Ghana, which is, you know, not too

246
00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:38,280
Speaker 3: far from Cape Coast or the big slave castle that

247
00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:42,200
Speaker 3: like shifts most Africans from West Africa to the Americas.

248
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:45,800
Speaker 3: Is I encounter such big five words and I was

249
00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:47,560
Speaker 3: so you know, iced to be so in my own

250
00:12:47,679 --> 00:12:49,360
Speaker 3: like brand, like I'm not gonna have five words, and

251
00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:51,520
Speaker 3: I'm saying twenty five year olds like we needed to

252
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:53,880
Speaker 3: get you know, my meximies are get the five words

253
00:12:53,880 --> 00:12:57,560
Speaker 3: cut out because they're just that huge. And I'm seeing

254
00:12:57,600 --> 00:12:59,840
Speaker 3: women who are forty years old with their five words

255
00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:02,680
Speaker 3: all the way up to like, you know, the top

256
00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:04,800
Speaker 3: of their belly where their stomach is, you know. So

257
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:09,800
Speaker 3: I think at some point it's not necessarily just you know, like, oh,

258
00:13:09,800 --> 00:13:11,880
Speaker 3: it's your diet. Because this was a fisherman's town. They

259
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:14,760
Speaker 3: all they ate was fish, you know, like so they

260
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:17,959
Speaker 3: didn't have soy milk, you know, so it's hard to

261
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:20,360
Speaker 3: be like, oh, yeah, we just do these things and

262
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,440
Speaker 3: we're going to be all right. So you know, like

263
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:24,000
Speaker 3: I think at the end of the day, there is

264
00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:25,760
Speaker 3: you know, I think the main thing is and I

265
00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:27,920
Speaker 3: think this is my message to black women, is to

266
00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:30,240
Speaker 3: just know that you know you're at risk. And I

267
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:32,360
Speaker 3: think the more you know better, you do better and

268
00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:34,800
Speaker 3: you compare yourself. I think the main thing with fireboards

269
00:13:34,920 --> 00:13:38,199
Speaker 3: is making the conscious decisions about your fertility and how

270
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:41,520
Speaker 3: you'll navigate fertility, knowing that you've had fiboards, you might

271
00:13:41,559 --> 00:13:45,199
Speaker 3: have fiboids, your sister or whoever, you know, like making

272
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,800
Speaker 3: sure you have that conversation about what you'll do, because

273
00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:50,160
Speaker 3: I think the hard part in today's America is that

274
00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:53,840
Speaker 3: everyone just thinks freezing your eggs is a solution to everything. However,

275
00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:57,280
Speaker 3: when you have fiveboards, you know, like having eggs in

276
00:13:57,280 --> 00:13:59,960
Speaker 3: the freezer is might not be a problem. Having repeat

277
00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:03,160
Speaker 3: mayamactomy or repeat surgery to remove fiboards that keep growing

278
00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:05,200
Speaker 3: back that actually might be your issue. And that's a

279
00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:08,520
Speaker 3: whole different situation. So, you know, just making sure that

280
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:11,319
Speaker 3: you make time to like even like think about it.

281
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're sitting here quiet because we're sitting here thinking

282
00:14:14,600 --> 00:14:15,160
Speaker 1: about it.

283
00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:17,199
Speaker 3: Yeah, like we're like.

284
00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:20,240
Speaker 2: Oh damn, I just I'm taking it all in and

285
00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:22,160
Speaker 2: I have a few random questions and this is not

286
00:14:22,240 --> 00:14:24,400
Speaker 2: a topic I'm very well versed on, so we are.

287
00:14:24,640 --> 00:14:27,080
Speaker 2: I am definitely learning a lot today already, doctor Joy.

288
00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,880
Speaker 2: So you're saying that a woman, a woman that has fibroids,

289
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,000
Speaker 2: she can get pregnant.

290
00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:34,720
Speaker 3: So there are studies that show that basically around for

291
00:14:34,880 --> 00:14:38,840
Speaker 3: centimeters is sometimes when fertility is impacted. However, you know,

292
00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:42,240
Speaker 3: also this is just from you know, my own experience

293
00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:44,240
Speaker 3: with you know, based when I was in residency and

294
00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:46,560
Speaker 3: I went to Howard for medical school. I worked with

295
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:50,440
Speaker 3: mostly like African American and West African women for as patients.

296
00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:53,880
Speaker 3: So I've seen plenty of women come in and deliver

297
00:14:54,080 --> 00:14:56,640
Speaker 3: with huge fibriards. You know, it's not that it's not

298
00:14:56,840 --> 00:14:59,440
Speaker 3: everybody that will impact, but it does have some impact

299
00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:02,360
Speaker 3: or fertility once it's larger. So once you have one

300
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:03,920
Speaker 3: of like if you have like maybe like a one

301
00:15:03,920 --> 00:15:05,960
Speaker 3: to three centime to fib word, I'm not thinking like

302
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,520
Speaker 3: you need to have surgery and in preparation to get pregnant. However,

303
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:11,200
Speaker 3: if you have like twenty fib orids and you are

304
00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:15,040
Speaker 3: saying gang gang, like that's you might have to redress.

305
00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:22,080
Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, gang gang. I had a gang I call.

306
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:28,360
Speaker 3: Let me tell you, I love it. I love it.

307
00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:30,080
Speaker 2: I mean sometimes you got it what they say, laugh

308
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:32,840
Speaker 2: and keep from keep from X.

309
00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:34,760
Speaker 3: I had it like when I have my surgery. I

310
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:37,840
Speaker 3: literally so my biggest fiber was pretty huge, and I

311
00:15:37,880 --> 00:15:40,760
Speaker 3: called her Felicia just because I can always feel her,

312
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:43,920
Speaker 3: and so I used to like record for my surgery.

313
00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:47,840
Speaker 3: I had a by Felicia party like where I had Yeah,

314
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,640
Speaker 3: like I feel like, you know, one of my friends

315
00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:51,800
Speaker 3: that you have to celebrate every moment in your life,

316
00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:54,520
Speaker 3: like you know, because especially I'm single, you know, like

317
00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:56,360
Speaker 3: I haven't had a baby shower. I haven't had a

318
00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:58,000
Speaker 3: bridal shower. I haven't had a wedding, but it was

319
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:00,600
Speaker 3: a way to celebrate myself and this deny that I

320
00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:02,160
Speaker 3: had going through. And I'm stung glad I did it

321
00:16:02,200 --> 00:16:04,960
Speaker 3: because you know, if I make it, everybody saw me

322
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,040
Speaker 3: well the last time. Oh my goodness.

323
00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:10,680
Speaker 2: So you had a by Felicia party in preparation for

324
00:16:10,840 --> 00:16:11,840
Speaker 2: year fivoid.

325
00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:13,440
Speaker 3: Serious, and I had my surgeon there so everybody can

326
00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:14,760
Speaker 3: look her in the eye and say, take care of

327
00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:18,000
Speaker 3: my friends. I love it.

328
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:20,560
Speaker 2: That is so amazing. What a way to just turn

329
00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:23,640
Speaker 2: the situation around us. Just switch up the energy, you

330
00:16:23,680 --> 00:16:24,960
Speaker 2: know what I mean, because it could be a very

331
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:28,800
Speaker 2: depressing time, but sort of seeing the light and the humor,

332
00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:30,360
Speaker 2: you know that in that moment.

333
00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:34,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, So there were a couple of things that you

334
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,680
Speaker 1: mentioned that I want to get back to.

335
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:38,200
Speaker 3: So one of.

336
00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:41,240
Speaker 1: The things that you mentioned is that sometimes people in

337
00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:45,280
Speaker 1: their like Facebook posts have talked about their fibroids shrinking

338
00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:48,960
Speaker 1: when the when in actuality, they didn't have fibroids, they

339
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:52,240
Speaker 1: had cyst. And so for me, what that brings up

340
00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:57,760
Speaker 1: is this this notion that one that there are times

341
00:16:57,760 --> 00:17:03,440
Speaker 1: when we may be misdiagnosed, and to the controversy around

342
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:10,040
Speaker 1: black women advocating for ourselves with medical professionals and the

343
00:17:10,080 --> 00:17:12,160
Speaker 1: medical professionals not listening to us.

344
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:14,119
Speaker 3: So I mean, I guess, like with the whole like

345
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,920
Speaker 3: you know, I guess ghosting of five words, shall we say?

346
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:18,920
Speaker 3: I always why I know this is because people come

347
00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:20,840
Speaker 3: into me and say I have five board It's like,

348
00:17:21,359 --> 00:17:22,960
Speaker 3: you know, I need them out, and so then I

349
00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:26,240
Speaker 3: do a ultrasown and there's nothing there, and so then

350
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:28,880
Speaker 3: like sometimes you ask more questions and it seems like yeah,

351
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:30,760
Speaker 3: they were saying like it was this size and it

352
00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:32,680
Speaker 3: was like mostly fluid, and it's like, actually, that was

353
00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:35,080
Speaker 3: probably a syst. It's no longer there as a result.

354
00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:37,760
Speaker 3: So I think, like it's just that it's really hard

355
00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:39,639
Speaker 3: because you know, you know, I talk to patients all

356
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:42,360
Speaker 3: the time. I think the problem is that patients don't

357
00:17:42,359 --> 00:17:44,760
Speaker 3: necessarily know their diagnoses. And that's also I think on

358
00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:47,560
Speaker 3: the physician to make sure they actually properly counsel people

359
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:50,400
Speaker 3: about what their diagnoses are so that they can keep

360
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:53,320
Speaker 3: inventory and so that because you know, if you have

361
00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:55,359
Speaker 3: a huge syst, sometimes that can twist and you can

362
00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:58,119
Speaker 3: be in an emergency surgery, you know, because you're in

363
00:17:58,160 --> 00:17:59,960
Speaker 3: so much pain and they have to save your old

364
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:02,920
Speaker 3: et cetera. So I think it's hard, you know, when

365
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:05,679
Speaker 3: we blut things in to like you know, oh, you

366
00:18:05,760 --> 00:18:08,040
Speaker 3: have like some kind of reproductive issue, and like people

367
00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:10,640
Speaker 3: don't know. So I just encourage everyone to make sure

368
00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:12,560
Speaker 3: that they have like a name, like write it down

369
00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:14,119
Speaker 3: for me, or can you print something out for me

370
00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:16,360
Speaker 3: so I know what that is, because I think that's

371
00:18:16,359 --> 00:18:19,440
Speaker 3: the first part of advocating for yourself is knowing your diagnoses.

372
00:18:20,119 --> 00:18:23,399
Speaker 3: I think it's really hard to you know, it's very

373
00:18:23,480 --> 00:18:27,320
Speaker 3: hard to advocate for yourself in the healthcare system just

374
00:18:27,359 --> 00:18:30,520
Speaker 3: because most of it's it's not designed to protect you.

375
00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:32,400
Speaker 3: I think, you know, if you look at the American

376
00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:34,720
Speaker 3: you know, look at the American government, I think the

377
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:38,360
Speaker 3: reason why we don't have you know, you know, I'm

378
00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:40,359
Speaker 3: scared to like give real opinions, but I'm gonna just

379
00:18:40,359 --> 00:18:43,119
Speaker 3: give it. I think the reason why we don't have

380
00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:45,679
Speaker 3: socialized medicine here is because you know, we've had this

381
00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:48,840
Speaker 3: like population of you know, African Americans who've been here

382
00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:52,320
Speaker 3: since you know, sixteen nineteen, who could just you know,

383
00:18:52,480 --> 00:18:55,760
Speaker 3: absorb resources even though we've put in too, like, you know,

384
00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,800
Speaker 3: get back whatever we put into the system. But I

385
00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:01,679
Speaker 3: think it's it's definitely at issue. You know, every other

386
00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:05,479
Speaker 3: industrialized country has socialized medicine and we don't. And so

387
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:07,840
Speaker 3: I think the system I just kind of like look

388
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,520
Speaker 3: at it as system's not designed to protect us, and

389
00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:12,879
Speaker 3: that's unfortunate because what do we need to take care

390
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:14,680
Speaker 3: of ourselves? We need a healthcare system and we live

391
00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:17,159
Speaker 3: in it and exist in America. But you know, I

392
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:21,280
Speaker 3: think the main things you can do is a ask

393
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:24,159
Speaker 3: advocate for yourself, but also get a second opinion. No

394
00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:26,080
Speaker 3: one has to you know, unless it's a life or

395
00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:28,600
Speaker 3: death situation. You can go somewhere else and ask someone

396
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:32,040
Speaker 3: else to do something, like I always offer my patients

397
00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:33,840
Speaker 3: sometimes if I'm not comfortable with going something, I'm like,

398
00:19:33,920 --> 00:19:35,600
Speaker 3: this person would be glad to do the thing that

399
00:19:35,640 --> 00:19:38,080
Speaker 3: you want to do, but on you know, my practice

400
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:40,360
Speaker 3: of medicine, I don't want to do those things because

401
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:41,879
Speaker 3: you know, I want to make sure I treat the

402
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,480
Speaker 3: whole person, and I want to treat your psyche and

403
00:19:43,520 --> 00:19:45,639
Speaker 3: make sure that I don't do something that you'll regret

404
00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:47,840
Speaker 3: later on, or you know, these different things and so

405
00:19:48,840 --> 00:19:51,280
Speaker 3: you always can ask another person. And I think that's

406
00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:54,359
Speaker 3: the key thing, is to redirect sometimes because you have

407
00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:56,679
Speaker 3: to shop, just like you a shop for you know,

408
00:19:57,600 --> 00:20:00,560
Speaker 3: a good man or a good partner woman and whoever.

409
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:02,520
Speaker 3: Like you know, like you need to like shop and

410
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:06,880
Speaker 3: make sure you get resources, you know, background checks, all

411
00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:09,359
Speaker 3: that different stuff, and especially in California, and California is

412
00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:12,000
Speaker 3: nice because you can look up the licenses of all

413
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:14,440
Speaker 3: physicians and see if they've ever had anything done against them,

414
00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:17,639
Speaker 3: so you know, like they have that on the website,

415
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:20,640
Speaker 3: you know, so it's really transparent here. So I think,

416
00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:22,679
Speaker 3: like you can I just say shop, you know, like

417
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:25,040
Speaker 3: you don't have to put up with anybody's stuff unless

418
00:20:25,080 --> 00:20:28,000
Speaker 3: it's an emergency. I don't really recommend like finding out

419
00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:30,000
Speaker 3: against medical advice to someone saying I need to do

420
00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:32,480
Speaker 3: something to save your life. But you know, if it's

421
00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:34,359
Speaker 3: something that's just like you know, something you're working on

422
00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:37,280
Speaker 3: or something some medical issues you need extra advice about,

423
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:38,400
Speaker 3: go to somebody else.

424
00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,639
Speaker 2: That's super helpful. And it kind of makes me think

425
00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:44,280
Speaker 2: about just in general, like vaginal health. And I talk

426
00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:47,320
Speaker 2: to a lot of women and I feel like many

427
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:49,200
Speaker 2: of us were not taught how to care for our

428
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:51,320
Speaker 2: lady part. So if you can just offer some advice

429
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:53,320
Speaker 2: on you know, different things that we should do and

430
00:20:53,359 --> 00:20:55,480
Speaker 2: maybe we shouldn't do. I know, I'm just gonna bring

431
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:57,320
Speaker 2: up this random thing, but I remember, ever since I

432
00:20:57,359 --> 00:20:59,639
Speaker 2: was little, my mom always used to say, don't do

433
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:00,800
Speaker 2: it's not good for you.

434
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:02,320
Speaker 3: It messes up the pH bounds.

435
00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:06,600
Speaker 2: So any pro tips around vaginal health would be super healthy.

436
00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:09,439
Speaker 3: Well, I mean, so it's interesting lately on Instagram and

437
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:13,040
Speaker 3: they've been advertising me all these different like vaginal health things,

438
00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:15,600
Speaker 3: and I'm like, your mom, like, I think I was

439
00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:17,400
Speaker 3: just trying to do nothing. The vagina is a self

440
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:20,159
Speaker 3: cleansing organ. There is nothing to do. If there is

441
00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:22,440
Speaker 3: a smell or something that's off, that means the pH

442
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:24,479
Speaker 3: is probably often we need to investigate and figure out

443
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:25,800
Speaker 3: if it's too a cynic and we need to get

444
00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:28,720
Speaker 3: it back towards seven orpus to you know, excuse me,

445
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:31,000
Speaker 3: to get it back towards like four or so four

446
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:32,960
Speaker 3: and a half, or if it's too basic and we

447
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,879
Speaker 3: need to get it back down towards four and a half.

448
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:38,000
Speaker 3: So I just kind of feel like, do nothing, do

449
00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:40,720
Speaker 3: no harm. That's howful about the vagina. Now, the thing

450
00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:42,479
Speaker 3: that people don't know is there are things to put

451
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:44,520
Speaker 3: in our vaginas all the time that can change the pH.

452
00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:48,160
Speaker 3: Case in points FERM firm definitely does increase your pH

453
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:50,760
Speaker 3: because firm is basic. And that's always my lesson. The

454
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:52,720
Speaker 3: patient's firm is basic. Think about that before you put

455
00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:56,520
Speaker 3: it inside you, so you know them unless it's somebody

456
00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:58,520
Speaker 3: you really trust to have the big experm inside of you,

457
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:01,000
Speaker 3: so you know, like things like that. So and that's

458
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:02,960
Speaker 3: how a lot of people get back to your vaginosis

459
00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:06,080
Speaker 3: because it's not an STD. It's just changing your environment.

460
00:22:06,119 --> 00:22:07,800
Speaker 3: And that's something that sperm can do. That's something that

461
00:22:07,880 --> 00:22:09,720
Speaker 3: even water can do. So you don't really need to

462
00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 3: douce and stuff like that. That said, I don't want

463
00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:14,080
Speaker 3: people to feel like, you know, don't feel bad about

464
00:22:14,119 --> 00:22:16,679
Speaker 3: not being taught a lot of vaginal health because you know,

465
00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:20,440
Speaker 3: I have my nonprofit Daughters of a DIASPRAA we teach

466
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:23,639
Speaker 3: reproductive health and self esteem to alics and girls throughout

467
00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:26,399
Speaker 3: the African diaspora. And I tell you every time we

468
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:28,760
Speaker 3: do these workshops, we have the downsoads that workshops to

469
00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:31,840
Speaker 3: like small groups because girls just have so many questions,

470
00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:33,960
Speaker 3: and a lot of it was discharged. A lot of

471
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:36,320
Speaker 3: it was like so wait this charge, what about this?

472
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:38,880
Speaker 3: And I think the key thing is like knowing you're

473
00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:41,639
Speaker 3: a normal, like know you're a baseline, because when it's

474
00:22:41,680 --> 00:22:44,880
Speaker 3: a shift from baseline, then that's a reason to consult somebody.

475
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,119
Speaker 3: But I feel like so many times people are like,

476
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:49,959
Speaker 3: oh today it was different, up, you know, like that's it,

477
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:51,880
Speaker 3: and it's like it needs to be a pattern. I think,

478
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:53,800
Speaker 3: you know, if you think you know the woman's cycle,

479
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:57,080
Speaker 3: it's a cycle, it's a pattern. So once you get

480
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,600
Speaker 3: out of pattern, and that's a reason to felt somebody.

481
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:01,680
Speaker 3: But sometimes most of these things do work themselves out.

482
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:04,040
Speaker 3: And I think a lot of the problem is because

483
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:07,120
Speaker 3: we have so much anxiety around our genitalia. I think

484
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:10,040
Speaker 3: people any sign of even like the smallest bump, people

485
00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 3: are coming in, like you know, and I think in

486
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:14,480
Speaker 3: the Kaiser system it's pretty easy to get seen, so

487
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:17,639
Speaker 3: people come in for like the most random things like

488
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:19,760
Speaker 3: oh I have this little and I'm like that's nothing.

489
00:23:20,160 --> 00:23:22,520
Speaker 2: That's a hair bump, girl, right, okay.

490
00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:25,960
Speaker 3: Warm contract, don't touch it, you know. So I think

491
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,800
Speaker 3: the key thing is really just knowing your normal and

492
00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:32,440
Speaker 3: just looking for is normal normalizing or is it getting worse?

493
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:33,879
Speaker 3: And so I think that's kind of the thing to

494
00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:36,840
Speaker 3: look out for, vaginal over all, that kind of.

495
00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 1: Health, Okay. And so then the next thing that I

496
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:45,040
Speaker 1: wanted to circle back to was about freezing your eggs.

497
00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:47,879
Speaker 1: Like there's been a lot of talk about that recently,

498
00:23:48,119 --> 00:23:50,480
Speaker 1: and I mean even for me personally. One of the

499
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:53,240
Speaker 1: things that I've told friends recently is that that's something

500
00:23:53,240 --> 00:23:56,280
Speaker 1: that I would advise my younger self to do. Is

501
00:23:56,840 --> 00:24:00,960
Speaker 1: at like twenty one, twenty five, I would have frozen

502
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:05,840
Speaker 1: my eggs. And so what is your take on eggs?

503
00:24:05,840 --> 00:24:07,520
Speaker 3: How old are you now? Though, if you don't mind

504
00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:11,720
Speaker 3: me asking, am I blow yes? Spot, It's all good.

505
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:14,760
Speaker 1: The listeners who have been around for a while, they know, yeah,

506
00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:16,080
Speaker 1: I'm thirty six.

507
00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:19,960
Speaker 3: Looking for So I think the hard part, I'm like

508
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,800
Speaker 3: really like, I'm not like, I'm not the like you know.

509
00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:25,280
Speaker 3: I have two close friends who are both reproductive in

510
00:24:25,320 --> 00:24:28,320
Speaker 3: the chronology and infertility specialists, which are the people who

511
00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:31,960
Speaker 3: do egg freezing, and they're so raw about egg freezing.

512
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:34,199
Speaker 3: But the thing is, I think people don't understand what

513
00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 3: eg freazing comes with. So if you had frozen your

514
00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:37,960
Speaker 3: eggs at twenty one, you would be paying rent on

515
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:41,360
Speaker 3: that every year until you decide to have a baby.

516
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:44,360
Speaker 3: So that's just like, you know, it's not like it's

517
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:47,080
Speaker 3: just you know, it's not like you just do it

518
00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:48,880
Speaker 3: and it's like, oh, I froze my eggs. They chilling

519
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:50,600
Speaker 3: and it's like, no, you got to pay the chill them.

520
00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:51,879
Speaker 3: So you would have had to have the money at

521
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:54,600
Speaker 3: twenty one to be able to maintain that. And maybe

522
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:56,360
Speaker 3: you were at that point in time where you can

523
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:58,119
Speaker 3: a pay for the like you know, five to ten

524
00:24:58,160 --> 00:25:00,760
Speaker 3: thousand dollars to actually like do the process and then

525
00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:03,280
Speaker 3: be actually pay the rent every month which is like

526
00:25:03,280 --> 00:25:05,280
Speaker 3: five hundred dollars to probably like a thousand or so

527
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:08,480
Speaker 3: to maintain that every year and keep them in the

528
00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:10,719
Speaker 3: freezing trust and belief. If you don't pay, it's just

529
00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:13,440
Speaker 3: like storage. You know, that stuff goes and you saw

530
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:16,080
Speaker 3: they did to macam xas stuff when they ain't pay

531
00:25:16,119 --> 00:25:19,080
Speaker 3: that bill, so they will throw out your precious eggs.

532
00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:21,760
Speaker 3: So I think the hard part is, like, you know,

533
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:23,760
Speaker 3: it's hard for me. I'm not a big advocate of

534
00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:25,880
Speaker 3: telling twenty one year olds to be you know, anxious

535
00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:29,280
Speaker 3: about their fertility. I think the key things are to really,

536
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:32,760
Speaker 3: you know, map out your life and map out your

537
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:34,639
Speaker 3: goals and kind of say, like, you know, do like

538
00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:37,360
Speaker 3: I forget their call, like you know, like it's kind

539
00:25:37,359 --> 00:25:39,679
Speaker 3: of like an algorithm. If I don't get married by

540
00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:41,280
Speaker 3: this time, or if I don't find a partner to

541
00:25:41,320 --> 00:25:43,040
Speaker 3: have you know, a baby with by this time, then

542
00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:45,000
Speaker 3: I'll do this at this age and blah blah blah,

543
00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:47,840
Speaker 3: because then you might lead to like, Okay, at this age,

544
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:50,119
Speaker 3: I would freeze my eggs because you know, like they

545
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:51,840
Speaker 3: allow people to do egg donation and a lot of

546
00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:54,880
Speaker 3: places up to like thirty two thirty three, So it's

547
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 3: not that you know your qualities is your equality of

548
00:25:57,240 --> 00:26:01,680
Speaker 3: egg doesn't really go down until thirty five. So it's

549
00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:03,080
Speaker 3: kind of hard to be like, oh, define freeze your

550
00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:05,240
Speaker 3: eggs as soon as you have some fresh ones. You know.

551
00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:08,479
Speaker 3: The other part of the egg freezing thing is, you know,

552
00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:11,120
Speaker 3: you have to consult what the live birth rate is

553
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:14,000
Speaker 3: of freezing your eggs. So the way I always I mean,

554
00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:16,240
Speaker 3: and this might be a little bit old data, because

555
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:18,000
Speaker 3: this is what when I was trained two years ago.

556
00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 3: And supposedly there are some technologies that are a little

557
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:23,720
Speaker 3: bit better. But they used to quote that every egg

558
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 3: has a three to five percent chance of actually becoming

559
00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 3: a whole human being, like a whole being actually born

560
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:33,040
Speaker 3: out of your womb and into this world. And so

561
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:35,200
Speaker 3: that might seem like, oh, what I wren three to

562
00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:37,520
Speaker 3: five percent, but that actually is like very little, and

563
00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 3: so you like they would recommend that you freeze like

564
00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:42,359
Speaker 3: about twenty eggs to kind of get that to like,

565
00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:45,600
Speaker 3: you know, the best chance of you like, actually having

566
00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:48,639
Speaker 3: a baby from this collection. That's one part. But just

567
00:26:48,720 --> 00:26:50,960
Speaker 3: to give you a comparison, you know, if you look

568
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:53,680
Speaker 3: at embryos, and this is what struck me in residency,

569
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:56,760
Speaker 3: because I was like, okay, so sperm matters. Because if

570
00:26:56,760 --> 00:26:59,360
Speaker 3: you freeze an embryo, which is IVF where they take

571
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:02,199
Speaker 3: out your eggs, then they take one little sperm, they

572
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:04,720
Speaker 3: allow it to fertilize that egg and grow for about

573
00:27:04,720 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 3: five days. Then they flash freeze it then and they

574
00:27:08,720 --> 00:27:11,160
Speaker 3: can tell the quality of that embryo, like tell you

575
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:14,359
Speaker 3: if it's genetically normal. You get more information and then

576
00:27:14,400 --> 00:27:17,520
Speaker 3: they can freeze it and that kind of gives you,

577
00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:20,600
Speaker 3: you know, that has a forty percent chance of actually

578
00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:22,919
Speaker 3: turning into a whole human being. So if you have

579
00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 3: like ten embryos, you're probably like in there in terms

580
00:27:25,600 --> 00:27:28,520
Speaker 3: of like, you know, actually making you know, a full

581
00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:32,159
Speaker 3: on baby. And so I think freezing your eggs you know,

582
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:34,640
Speaker 3: you know, I have friends who had to do multiple

583
00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:36,840
Speaker 3: cycles to try and get to that lucky number fifteen

584
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:39,240
Speaker 3: to twenty basically, So it's not that it's you know,

585
00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:40,840
Speaker 3: I think we you know, I think it's great if

586
00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:43,159
Speaker 3: you like work at Google or Facebook all these places

587
00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:44,880
Speaker 3: that just pay for it and then maybe you don't

588
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,959
Speaker 3: have to pay the cost or you know, it's kind

589
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 3: of like no sweat off your back. But I think

590
00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:49,840
Speaker 3: it's something you really have to think about. Am I

591
00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:53,560
Speaker 3: willing to invest money? Definitely? Then being what am I freezing?

592
00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:55,400
Speaker 3: Am I just freezing eggs? Am I finding a sperm

593
00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:58,280
Speaker 3: donor to actually like freeze with the eggs? And you know,

594
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:00,800
Speaker 3: all these different things. And even still if you freeze

595
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:04,760
Speaker 3: embryos with a partner who is or is not your partner,

596
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:07,680
Speaker 3: you know, like they can always Custody is a huge

597
00:28:07,720 --> 00:28:10,720
Speaker 3: issue when it comes to embryos. Custody goes like usually

598
00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:12,840
Speaker 3: you sign paperwork that both of you have to decide

599
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:15,439
Speaker 3: to turn this into a baby in order to like

600
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:17,399
Speaker 3: actually have a baby. So that means if you guys

601
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:20,679
Speaker 3: break up, this other person has power over what you

602
00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:22,560
Speaker 3: do with your embryos, and those might be all you

603
00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:25,280
Speaker 3: have left. So I think it's kind of like it's

604
00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:28,000
Speaker 3: just a really really complicated thing. And so I think

605
00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 3: everyone just says, like freezing your eggs as if it's

606
00:28:30,080 --> 00:28:32,080
Speaker 3: just like, you know, like let me go to Hawaii

607
00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:34,480
Speaker 3: next month. It's not that simple. It's much cheaper to

608
00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:37,680
Speaker 3: go to Hawaii, a probably better for your mental health.

609
00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:41,360
Speaker 3: But you know, I think it's just like just to really,

610
00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:44,240
Speaker 3: like again, like look within, dig deep and try and

611
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:46,920
Speaker 3: figure out what do I really want? Do I want?

612
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:48,120
Speaker 3: You know? And the thing is a lot of times

613
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:51,200
Speaker 3: people don't use those eggs, so you might feed me

614
00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 3: to partner. Everyone's going to try and get pregnant spontaneously

615
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:56,040
Speaker 3: because that's more money if you have to unfreeze them

616
00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:58,720
Speaker 3: and actually get them fertilized. So you're gonna, you know,

617
00:28:58,760 --> 00:29:00,520
Speaker 3: it's good to have them like just in the back

618
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:02,560
Speaker 3: of your mind, just in case. But then let's say

619
00:29:02,560 --> 00:29:04,040
Speaker 3: you have your family, what do you do. Are you

620
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:05,480
Speaker 3: going to stop paying rent on them and then get

621
00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:07,280
Speaker 3: rid of them. Do you save them for your granddaughter,

622
00:29:07,280 --> 00:29:09,440
Speaker 3: for your daughter, Like what do you do? You know?

623
00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,640
Speaker 3: So that's just something to think about too, is that,

624
00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:13,520
Speaker 3: like you know, a lot of people don't necessarily use them.

625
00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:15,840
Speaker 3: And there's an article in New York Times recently about

626
00:29:15,840 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 3: a woman who, like you know, throws her eggs. Then

627
00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:22,160
Speaker 3: she unfros up and they didn't none of them turned

628
00:29:22,160 --> 00:29:24,640
Speaker 3: into a baby, and that was really hard for her

629
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:27,080
Speaker 3: because nobody talks about that part. So I just feel

630
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,680
Speaker 3: like this, keep all your information, you know, Like I

631
00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:32,960
Speaker 3: think it's just really important to nothing is full proof.

632
00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:34,840
Speaker 3: I think the only thing that's full proof is actually

633
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:37,040
Speaker 3: having a baby that's there next to you and say like, okay,

634
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:40,320
Speaker 3: I had a baby, you know. So I think, you know,

635
00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:42,400
Speaker 3: I think we just have to have to get beyond

636
00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:44,239
Speaker 3: the whole. Like I think it's just so sexy right

637
00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:46,400
Speaker 3: now to safe, you know, freezing my eggs, and I

638
00:29:46,400 --> 00:29:48,400
Speaker 3: think people don't realize the roots of it. The roots

639
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:51,160
Speaker 3: of egg freezing came from cancer patients who are literally

640
00:29:51,160 --> 00:29:53,240
Speaker 3: going through chemo and we're literally gonna like you know,

641
00:29:53,480 --> 00:29:55,600
Speaker 3: they won't be able to like they're gonna lose all

642
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:58,040
Speaker 3: their eggs. So of course you would do this if

643
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:00,160
Speaker 3: someone's definitely like, you know, this is all it have.

644
00:30:00,280 --> 00:30:03,680
Speaker 3: It's that desperate of the situation. But I think again

645
00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:06,480
Speaker 3: it's important just to kind of like what am I

646
00:30:06,560 --> 00:30:08,640
Speaker 3: doing this for? Will I need to use this? Will

647
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:10,479
Speaker 3: I'm not, and just kind of really like, you know,

648
00:30:11,200 --> 00:30:13,239
Speaker 3: think about it. Don't just like feel like you just

649
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:15,680
Speaker 3: have to do it because everybody's doing it. Because even

650
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:17,720
Speaker 3: like this new app, I hate to give, like, you know,

651
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:19,760
Speaker 3: credence to something. But Modern Facility is app that I

652
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:23,000
Speaker 3: keep getting advertised on Instagram, like know your numbers. Like

653
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:26,320
Speaker 3: I think it's hard because we keep translating data that

654
00:30:26,360 --> 00:30:29,160
Speaker 3: come from infertility, and infertility means not to get pregnant

655
00:30:29,160 --> 00:30:33,200
Speaker 3: with one partner for one year after having sex, strategically basically,

656
00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:37,360
Speaker 3: and so if technically, if you're if you're a woman

657
00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:39,720
Speaker 3: by yourself and you haven't tried to get pregnant, you're

658
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,600
Speaker 3: not infertile, you know what I mean, You just don't

659
00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:45,400
Speaker 3: know about your fertility, and those numbers don't necessarily correlate

660
00:30:45,440 --> 00:30:47,760
Speaker 3: with when you get those numbers done and you feel like, oh,

661
00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:49,480
Speaker 3: gret I got my numbers, they look good, that doesn't

662
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:52,640
Speaker 3: necessarily correlate with if you'll get pregnant in the next year.

663
00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:55,760
Speaker 3: That just says if you were trying, you know, like

664
00:30:55,840 --> 00:30:58,000
Speaker 3: if you were trying to get pregnant in the last

665
00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:02,080
Speaker 3: year with somebody, they can use certain medications to stimulate

666
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:04,680
Speaker 3: you easily. But it's not necessarily like you know, it

667
00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:06,600
Speaker 3: doesn't you shouldn't make you just like feel like, oh,

668
00:31:06,680 --> 00:31:09,800
Speaker 3: my fertility is fine, or if you have devastating numbers,

669
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:12,000
Speaker 3: does that mean all of a sudden that you're infertile?

670
00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:14,520
Speaker 3: We don't know. So it's just kind of like I

671
00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:16,040
Speaker 3: think tests that you know, you have to be really

672
00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:19,000
Speaker 3: careful about. I think in medicine there's so much information

673
00:31:19,040 --> 00:31:22,920
Speaker 3: out there, and I think what my understanding your medicine

674
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:25,040
Speaker 3: is that you should Why are you testing for something?

675
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:26,760
Speaker 3: That's always a question what are you gonna do with

676
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:29,160
Speaker 3: this information? Because you can get information, but if you

677
00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:30,360
Speaker 3: don't know what you're gonna do with it, if it's

678
00:31:30,360 --> 00:31:32,560
Speaker 3: gonna cause anxiety and you're not gonna be ready to

679
00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:35,360
Speaker 3: act on it, then why are you even getting that information?

680
00:31:35,720 --> 00:31:37,320
Speaker 3: And that has been my TED talk. So as that

681
00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:41,800
Speaker 3: was long and welcome to my TED talk. I love it.

682
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:45,040
Speaker 2: That was a lot to consider. That's really really like

683
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:47,320
Speaker 2: mind blowing. I never did the research, so I never

684
00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 2: do all this.

685
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:50,680
Speaker 1: But yeah, I'm sitting here and I'm like, what I

686
00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:53,040
Speaker 1: really like is when you started off saying about that

687
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:57,320
Speaker 1: decision making tree of like, Okay, I'm twenty one, I'm

688
00:31:57,360 --> 00:32:01,880
Speaker 1: twenty five, and I'm thinking about I maybe I want

689
00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:05,160
Speaker 1: a family. I like what you said about thinking about

690
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 1: like the what ifs, Like what if I get.

691
00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:08,840
Speaker 3: To twenty five and.

692
00:32:10,600 --> 00:32:13,280
Speaker 1: I don't I don't have a partner, a suitable partner.

693
00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:17,280
Speaker 1: What if I get to twenty five and I find

694
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:22,440
Speaker 1: out that I have fibroids, or I have pcos, or

695
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:25,000
Speaker 1: I have lots of cysts on my over east. I

696
00:32:25,160 --> 00:32:29,760
Speaker 1: like that idea of really fleshing out the what ifs

697
00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:31,760
Speaker 1: so that you can be prepared down the lid.

698
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:33,840
Speaker 3: Because no one's telling us to do it. They just say, like,

699
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:36,200
Speaker 3: you know, I think it's like, I think this is

700
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:39,880
Speaker 3: the problem. We spend so much time as women fantasizing

701
00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:42,280
Speaker 3: about a marriage, fantasizing not even a marriage. Let me

702
00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 3: start a wedding, what colors are gonna wear? How many

703
00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:47,280
Speaker 3: kids are going to have? And we plan for careers,

704
00:32:47,280 --> 00:32:49,120
Speaker 3: we plan for like this is I'm one of this

705
00:32:49,240 --> 00:32:51,640
Speaker 3: college I'm going the other's things. And I'm like, and

706
00:32:51,680 --> 00:32:53,520
Speaker 3: I used to tell myself, I'm getting married at thirty.

707
00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:55,200
Speaker 3: Now I don't know how I thought I was going

708
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:58,000
Speaker 3: to get married at thirty with no strategy. But you know,

709
00:32:58,000 --> 00:32:59,360
Speaker 3: I was like, I don't need a strategy for love.

710
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:02,240
Speaker 3: I just need to strike, you know, for getting my career,

711
00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:04,320
Speaker 3: all these different things. And I feel like we have

712
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:07,880
Speaker 3: not been good about, like, you know, life coaching ourselves,

713
00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:10,480
Speaker 3: I should say, outside of like in our actual personal lives,

714
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:13,440
Speaker 3: like what are my personal goals? You know? How do

715
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:15,520
Speaker 3: I achieve these different things? And I think part of

716
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 3: me being thirty five and haven't already had a surgery

717
00:33:18,080 --> 00:33:21,480
Speaker 3: to preserve my fertility, which is a miamectomy, you know,

718
00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:24,600
Speaker 3: or removing your fibrus from uters, it made me think

719
00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:26,720
Speaker 3: I had never thought about any of these things until

720
00:33:26,760 --> 00:33:28,840
Speaker 3: it was like, wait, I just had surgery to move

721
00:33:28,920 --> 00:33:30,840
Speaker 3: five boards and I kept my uters so that I

722
00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:32,400
Speaker 3: could have a baby, And it's like, wait, where is

723
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:34,200
Speaker 3: this baby? When am I going to have this baby?

724
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:38,240
Speaker 3: I think totally like, you know, reset the way I

725
00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:40,480
Speaker 3: looked at the world, because I just don't want a

726
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:42,400
Speaker 3: different person my friend will tell you. She was like, oh,

727
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:44,440
Speaker 3: before you had surgery, we were like, oh, if anything happens,

728
00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:47,040
Speaker 3: I'll adopt a baby if I never. But after I,

729
00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:49,520
Speaker 3: like has surgery, I feel like I sacrificed myself for

730
00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:52,560
Speaker 3: some future child that I don't know. And I was like, oh, no,

731
00:33:52,640 --> 00:33:55,160
Speaker 3: like I gotta have a baby now. And so it's just,

732
00:33:55,680 --> 00:33:58,640
Speaker 3: you know, like it's just important that we make plans

733
00:33:58,680 --> 00:34:01,360
Speaker 3: because I think otherwise I will plan and go on

734
00:34:01,520 --> 00:34:03,600
Speaker 3: without you. And you know that's why I say I'm

735
00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:05,520
Speaker 3: not like opposed to freezing your eggs. I think it's

736
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 3: just you have to figure out what is your strategy

737
00:34:07,560 --> 00:34:09,080
Speaker 3: and why are you doing it? I think, don't do

738
00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:12,719
Speaker 3: it just because everybody says do it. That's where I

739
00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:14,239
Speaker 3: know a lot of women now who are like, you know,

740
00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:16,680
Speaker 3: once they get married and have a partner, they have problems,

741
00:34:16,719 --> 00:34:18,720
Speaker 3: like you know, conceiving and they're like, oh, I should

742
00:34:18,719 --> 00:34:20,920
Speaker 3: have frozen my eggs, and I'm like, Sis, it's your

743
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:23,000
Speaker 3: man's firm count that was not going to protect you

744
00:34:23,040 --> 00:34:25,839
Speaker 3: from this, you know what I mean. So, like, you know,

745
00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:28,760
Speaker 3: there's so many things that you know you have to consider,

746
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:31,480
Speaker 3: like you know, in terms of instead of just saying like, oh,

747
00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:32,919
Speaker 3: I should have just frozen my eggs and that would

748
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:35,279
Speaker 3: have cured everything. It's not going to cure anything. It's

749
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:35,760
Speaker 3: an option.

750
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:38,839
Speaker 2: This is super helpful, Doctor Jordan, and I have to say,

751
00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 2: I love when we have just amazing black women come

752
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:44,760
Speaker 2: on our show. I feel like the black girl magic

753
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,600
Speaker 2: is just exuding from your mic. I feel like my melanie,

754
00:34:48,760 --> 00:34:51,759
Speaker 2: my melanine is being activated. I just feel super I'm

755
00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:56,480
Speaker 2: just on my right now. Yes, And then you're so accomplished,

756
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:59,319
Speaker 2: Like what even interested you in these topics? You know

757
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:03,719
Speaker 2: you you still I need sexually transmitted infections and you

758
00:35:03,760 --> 00:35:07,000
Speaker 2: said that you're what was it a surgeon? I'm like, what,

759
00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:10,200
Speaker 2: this black woman is amazing? What made you dive into this?

760
00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:13,520
Speaker 3: As I said, I'm a Philly girl. I when I

761
00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:15,319
Speaker 3: was in high school, I went to Girls High which

762
00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 3: is like one of the oldest public all girls schools

763
00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:22,120
Speaker 3: that are remaining. And honestly, I think going to that

764
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,600
Speaker 3: school it was a majority black and seeing so many

765
00:35:24,600 --> 00:35:28,360
Speaker 3: of my like kids like you know, have teenage pregnancies,

766
00:35:28,440 --> 00:35:30,040
Speaker 3: have all like I remember everybody to run to this

767
00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:33,000
Speaker 3: STV clinic across the street at Einstein and be like

768
00:35:33,040 --> 00:35:35,799
Speaker 3: oh girl, we gotta get tested. And it just made

769
00:35:35,840 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 3: me like I want to be a doctor for these girls,

770
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:40,680
Speaker 3: Like I want to be there a doctor who's going

771
00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:43,160
Speaker 3: to break it down, who's going to have the information,

772
00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:45,160
Speaker 3: because I just felt like there was so much curiosity

773
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:48,400
Speaker 3: and not a lot of answers, and we like underestimate

774
00:35:48,440 --> 00:35:50,560
Speaker 3: how much girls talk, how much, like you know, we

775
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:52,520
Speaker 3: just get a lot of our information from like really

776
00:35:52,560 --> 00:35:56,120
Speaker 3: bad sources, like our friends. And so for me always

777
00:35:56,160 --> 00:35:57,799
Speaker 3: just trying to like anytime I have a patient, I'm

778
00:35:57,800 --> 00:35:59,560
Speaker 3: trying to inject them with information because I know if

779
00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:02,040
Speaker 3: I tell a woman something, I'm telling her whole community

780
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:05,480
Speaker 3: because women talk. So I think those are the things

781
00:36:05,480 --> 00:36:07,279
Speaker 3: that experience really made me like, I don't want to

782
00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 3: be an OBG. I. I want to be an urban

783
00:36:09,239 --> 00:36:12,319
Speaker 3: adolescent OBG I M. And so I'm working. I'm on

784
00:36:12,360 --> 00:36:14,640
Speaker 3: the urban part. I haven't done an adolescent part so much,

785
00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:18,160
Speaker 3: but I think that was really what motivated me. And

786
00:36:18,160 --> 00:36:19,799
Speaker 3: when I was in high school, I was, you know,

787
00:36:19,880 --> 00:36:21,400
Speaker 3: I loved my high school safe. So when I was

788
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,480
Speaker 3: in college, I used to go back to my high

789
00:36:24,480 --> 00:36:26,920
Speaker 3: school and visited it. And they had done a surveillance

790
00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:29,120
Speaker 3: study in the city of Philadelphia where they tested all

791
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:31,759
Speaker 3: the high school students for STDs, and I was fascinated

792
00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:34,480
Speaker 3: with the data they were getting Like STDs, like committee,

793
00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:37,239
Speaker 3: which is very common between women ages fifteen and twenty four.

794
00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:40,080
Speaker 3: They were getting it down to zip code, so there

795
00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:43,000
Speaker 3: was some brother in that zip code, a university city

796
00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:46,440
Speaker 3: run around the whole neighborhood, just affecting everybody with Clevitia

797
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:49,800
Speaker 3: because that whole like zip code was lit up with Chlmythia,

798
00:36:50,239 --> 00:36:52,319
Speaker 3: and I was like, what is this? Like, what is

799
00:36:53,239 --> 00:36:55,120
Speaker 3: you know, what is this STD thing? And that's what

800
00:36:55,160 --> 00:36:57,600
Speaker 3: made me like, I was so excited to study STDs

801
00:36:57,600 --> 00:37:00,680
Speaker 3: and HIV because you know the difference between like pregnancy

802
00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 3: and STDs is that anybody can get pregnant if you

803
00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:06,960
Speaker 3: have sperm and a hosts each other. But STDs are

804
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:09,520
Speaker 3: all about your network. And so a lot of what

805
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:12,320
Speaker 3: we teach at DD or Daughters of the Diaspora is

806
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:14,879
Speaker 3: that your network determines your net worth. And I think

807
00:37:14,960 --> 00:37:16,960
Speaker 3: so often, you know, when you're growing up in school,

808
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:18,960
Speaker 3: they tell you, like the dude who's the fly one

809
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:20,680
Speaker 3: who's been with everybody, that's what you're trying to get with.

810
00:37:20,920 --> 00:37:24,160
Speaker 3: But that's a dude who's exposed to everybody's STDs up

811
00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:27,799
Speaker 3: in here, whether it be HPV human papulum virus which

812
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:30,839
Speaker 3: causes cervical cancer, or herpes. Those you can get without

813
00:37:30,920 --> 00:37:33,920
Speaker 3: condoms or excuse me, with condom, with or without condom.

814
00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:36,640
Speaker 3: So you know, like you're exposing yourself to stuff you

815
00:37:36,680 --> 00:37:39,520
Speaker 3: don't even know about. So watch your network because you

816
00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:41,040
Speaker 3: don't want to be in the network or in the

817
00:37:41,080 --> 00:37:44,520
Speaker 3: circle of the dude who's walking around giving everybody you know,

818
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:48,080
Speaker 3: future admiral path smears. So I think, like, you know,

819
00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:49,399
Speaker 3: those are the kind of things that kind of got

820
00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:51,640
Speaker 3: me interested in like it was my community, and I

821
00:37:51,640 --> 00:37:53,560
Speaker 3: think a lot of my experiences were born out of

822
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:57,000
Speaker 3: not initial community, and that's probably why I moved to Oakland,

823
00:37:57,000 --> 00:38:01,200
Speaker 3: because I was looking for something similar but not homes.

824
00:38:01,320 --> 00:38:04,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is so inspiring, and I already have a

825
00:38:04,880 --> 00:38:07,719
Speaker 2: bunch of questions about STIs and std So we're going

826
00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:09,439
Speaker 2: to have to have you back, doctor Joyce. You could

827
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:12,040
Speaker 2: dive into that topic and educate our women, because, like

828
00:38:12,080 --> 00:38:14,799
Speaker 2: you said, when you tell a woman something, especially a

829
00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:18,200
Speaker 2: black woman, you already know her community. We're gonna know

830
00:38:18,239 --> 00:38:19,640
Speaker 2: it's gonna be in a group chat it's going to

831
00:38:19,680 --> 00:38:21,120
Speaker 2: be the next girl's night, you know what I mean,

832
00:38:21,160 --> 00:38:23,799
Speaker 2: the next turn up, the next kickback, whatever it is.

833
00:38:24,239 --> 00:38:27,759
Speaker 2: And so with that then said, we would love to

834
00:38:27,880 --> 00:38:32,640
Speaker 2: move on and dive into our next session. So, Doctor Joy,

835
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:37,080
Speaker 2: because we recognize and appreciate and celebrate the multifaceted woman,

836
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:40,399
Speaker 2: and we believe that it's okay to be classy and

837
00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:43,200
Speaker 2: ratchet and you can still be elegant and dance to

838
00:38:43,239 --> 00:38:46,080
Speaker 2: strip club music, we want to invite you to the

839
00:38:46,239 --> 00:38:49,520
Speaker 2: oh you clatch it segment? So Doctor Joy, do you

840
00:38:49,560 --> 00:38:52,320
Speaker 2: take on the challenge?

841
00:38:52,960 --> 00:38:53,160
Speaker 3: Ay?

842
00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:57,040
Speaker 2: All right, all right, So our first question is what's

843
00:38:57,080 --> 00:38:59,520
Speaker 2: the most spontaneous thing you've ever done.

844
00:39:00,160 --> 00:39:02,880
Speaker 3: I'm a super spontaneous person, so I'm like got to

845
00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:09,200
Speaker 3: figure I was going to press y'all. Oh my god. Sorry,

846
00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:11,560
Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm like, gosh, give me these questions. I'm like,

847
00:39:12,160 --> 00:39:17,319
Speaker 3: I got a lot to choose from. I'm the type

848
00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:19,319
Speaker 3: of chicken would just like hop on a flight. And

849
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:22,239
Speaker 3: so like, my god children live in Kenya and I

850
00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:25,560
Speaker 3: visit them every you know, usually every year. And as

851
00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:28,160
Speaker 3: I was on my way to Kenya, like my friend

852
00:39:28,239 --> 00:39:31,680
Speaker 3: texts me, who lives in Ethiopia, and She's like, girl,

853
00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:34,160
Speaker 3: I'm going to Zanzibar like Countess Anzibar. And I had

854
00:39:34,160 --> 00:39:36,279
Speaker 3: told my mom like, I'm going to East Africa, but

855
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 3: I'm not doing Vandabar. This is not a ChIL trip

856
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:41,160
Speaker 3: for me. I need to spend time with my god children.

857
00:39:41,320 --> 00:39:43,200
Speaker 3: So my friend's like, yo, like you gotta come to

858
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:45,719
Speaker 3: you gotta come to Zanzibar, and I'm like, oh whatever, girl.

859
00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:47,960
Speaker 3: Like thirty minutes later, I just booked a ticket and

860
00:39:48,040 --> 00:39:49,800
Speaker 3: was like, Okay, I'm gonna go to Kenya to Zanzibar

861
00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:52,759
Speaker 3: and just do it. And so I think that's like

862
00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:55,239
Speaker 3: probably most fantasmicause my friends still talk about that to

863
00:39:55,239 --> 00:39:56,560
Speaker 3: this day because it was in the group chat that

864
00:39:56,640 --> 00:39:58,560
Speaker 3: she like kind of set me up. So it was like, oh,

865
00:39:58,600 --> 00:40:01,480
Speaker 3: I gotta do this, love it. Yes, that is pretty

866
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:04,279
Speaker 3: like I didn't trial. I'm really spontaneous when it comes

867
00:40:04,280 --> 00:40:05,560
Speaker 3: to travel. I'll just feel like I want to go

868
00:40:05,640 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 3: here and like let me just do it. Like last week,

869
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:09,239
Speaker 3: I just drove to l like I need a new

870
00:40:09,360 --> 00:40:10,759
Speaker 3: change the scenery, and so I think when it comes

871
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,719
Speaker 3: to travel, I'll be very spontaneous. I love it.

872
00:40:14,239 --> 00:40:15,880
Speaker 1: I love it and what I love about that is

873
00:40:15,920 --> 00:40:19,160
Speaker 1: that you your friends know you well enough to know

874
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,480
Speaker 1: that if they're going to challenge you on that, they

875
00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:22,600
Speaker 1: got to put it in the group.

876
00:40:22,719 --> 00:40:25,320
Speaker 3: Check girl, because you're not going back down.

877
00:40:25,160 --> 00:40:27,480
Speaker 2: That you that you want to go to Atlanta this

878
00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:28,600
Speaker 2: weekend just randomly.

879
00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:31,640
Speaker 3: I know, I know you ain't gonna do it from

880
00:40:31,719 --> 00:40:33,839
Speaker 3: those furs like that.

881
00:40:38,840 --> 00:40:43,640
Speaker 1: So, speaking of hanging out with your girls, what do

882
00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:45,600
Speaker 1: you do for fun?

883
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:51,040
Speaker 3: What do I do for fun? It's so weird because

884
00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:54,800
Speaker 3: I feel like living in Oakland is totally like changed.

885
00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:56,919
Speaker 3: I don't like clubbing anymore since living out here because

886
00:40:56,920 --> 00:40:58,759
Speaker 3: I feel like the clubs are kind of weak. Yeah

887
00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:03,680
Speaker 3: I said it. I mean I honestly, I would say

888
00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:05,560
Speaker 3: my favorite thing to do now since I moved out

889
00:41:05,600 --> 00:41:08,920
Speaker 3: here became an adult growing up, it's actually having house parties,

890
00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:11,319
Speaker 3: Like I love having like dinner parties, like people are

891
00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:13,560
Speaker 3: just like eating as well as the food is right

892
00:41:13,560 --> 00:41:15,480
Speaker 3: and the drink is right, people have a good time,

893
00:41:15,520 --> 00:41:17,560
Speaker 3: and I'm always amazed with how simple it can be.

894
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:20,200
Speaker 3: So I really would say, like, honestly, I like hosting.

895
00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:22,240
Speaker 3: I feel like living out here in open and seeing

896
00:41:22,239 --> 00:41:24,359
Speaker 3: how many gentrified spaces there are. There aren't a lot

897
00:41:24,360 --> 00:41:27,160
Speaker 3: of like all black spaces. And being from Philadelphiaya, I'm

898
00:41:27,239 --> 00:41:29,600
Speaker 3: used to that it's a very segregated city. So I'm

899
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 3: used to, like, you know, the whole city feeling like home.

900
00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:33,719
Speaker 3: But here I kind of feel like, you know, as

901
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,200
Speaker 3: soon as I leave my door, you know, my neighbors

902
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:38,120
Speaker 3: look at me like why you live here? How can

903
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:40,959
Speaker 3: you afford this? Are you section eight? Blah blah blah,

904
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:44,480
Speaker 3: and you know, leave my door. It's like, you know,

905
00:41:44,480 --> 00:41:46,480
Speaker 3: I feel like the world hits me, and I feel

906
00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:48,200
Speaker 3: like in my home when I invite my friends in

907
00:41:48,239 --> 00:41:50,839
Speaker 3: my home and like we just have a good old time,

908
00:41:50,920 --> 00:41:53,200
Speaker 3: I just feel like that's like that's been like the

909
00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:55,600
Speaker 3: warmest moment for me, like just hosting my friends over here.

910
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:57,359
Speaker 3: So that's what I do for fun. Now.

911
00:41:57,440 --> 00:42:01,120
Speaker 2: Guess that actually sounds so amazing, especially as an adult.

912
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:02,600
Speaker 2: You know, you're in a safe space. You don't got

913
00:42:02,600 --> 00:42:04,800
Speaker 2: to worry about no crazies, you know, shooting up the

914
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:06,480
Speaker 2: spot you like in your own space.

915
00:42:06,560 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 3: I love that.

916
00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:10,839
Speaker 2: Okay, And the next question is what's your biggest pet?

917
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:19,120
Speaker 3: Pee? Oh, all right, it's and so I'm trying to

918
00:42:19,120 --> 00:42:22,720
Speaker 3: just sound too like bougie though, Hold hold on, No, judgment,

919
00:42:22,760 --> 00:42:27,759
Speaker 3: no judgment shadow, but like I really just don't like

920
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:30,080
Speaker 3: my pet peeve is actually when people text and have

921
00:42:30,200 --> 00:42:32,520
Speaker 3: like really like a lot of spelling artists, or like

922
00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:34,480
Speaker 3: when you're trying to clap back in the shade room

923
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:40,280
Speaker 3: and you got like you know, uh uh your ispell wrong. Yeah,

924
00:42:40,360 --> 00:42:42,279
Speaker 3: like there there's like all that kind of stuff. I'm

925
00:42:42,320 --> 00:42:44,279
Speaker 3: just coming like, don't you know how to like you know,

926
00:42:44,680 --> 00:42:46,960
Speaker 3: reread this and before edit it. You know, you're so

927
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:49,480
Speaker 3: like hype to get something out that you're not even

928
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,959
Speaker 3: completing a thought. So for me, it's just like that's

929
00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:55,600
Speaker 3: like my pet pee like spell correctly, use your use

930
00:42:55,640 --> 00:42:59,800
Speaker 3: the proper word for whatever word, and you know, just no,

931
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:02,799
Speaker 3: like you know, like just take the time to like

932
00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:04,880
Speaker 3: read it. I feel like everything in social with these tweets,

933
00:43:04,880 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 3: people don't realize, you know, it's different. I think the

934
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:09,799
Speaker 3: spoken word is different than like the written word. When

935
00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:12,160
Speaker 3: you read something that lasts forever, like look at you know,

936
00:43:12,160 --> 00:43:14,560
Speaker 3: the Kevin Hart situation. That's why that thing came up

937
00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:17,320
Speaker 3: and down because you wrote that down that is cemented

938
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:19,640
Speaker 3: in time. And so I think it's important just to

939
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:21,640
Speaker 3: think about what you write down and like how you

940
00:43:21,640 --> 00:43:23,799
Speaker 3: write it and how you say it. So that's my

941
00:43:23,840 --> 00:43:25,640
Speaker 3: big pet Peece. I feel like in this day and age,

942
00:43:25,640 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 3: everyone's trying to go out there one hundred and forty

943
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:29,680
Speaker 3: characters but not really giving thought and time into it.

944
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:33,480
Speaker 1: Yes, I am with you on that, Like, oh that

945
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:34,800
Speaker 1: makes my soul cringe.

946
00:43:35,239 --> 00:43:40,080
Speaker 3: Oh. Yes, the things that really make me happy are

947
00:43:40,120 --> 00:43:42,520
Speaker 3: a good caption. Oh my gosh, if you caption things

948
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:46,359
Speaker 3: for the god, oh, I'm with you. I'll wad them.

949
00:43:46,360 --> 00:43:47,920
Speaker 2: Captions where you're like, damn, I wish I would have

950
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:48,279
Speaker 2: thought that.

951
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:54,120
Speaker 3: I had one yesterday that was like, ah, like capture captured,

952
00:43:54,239 --> 00:43:55,880
Speaker 3: like I just share to like read the caption, like

953
00:43:55,920 --> 00:43:57,600
Speaker 3: you know, I love it when it's just like it

954
00:43:57,680 --> 00:43:59,239
Speaker 3: ain't even gotta go with the pictures. It's like, let

955
00:43:59,239 --> 00:44:03,279
Speaker 3: me have a word for you. Mm hmm yep. I'm

956
00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:04,759
Speaker 3: with it. I'm with it.

957
00:44:05,239 --> 00:44:09,600
Speaker 1: So the next question, what's the most cringe worthy outfit

958
00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:15,080
Speaker 1: you've ever worn? Now, you said your bougie, So that

959
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:18,799
Speaker 1: means that you probably had few cringe worthy outfits.

960
00:44:18,880 --> 00:44:20,960
Speaker 3: Like that's what I'm saying, like cringeworthy as it. I'm

961
00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:24,600
Speaker 3: just like, I don't know, I don't live with my clothes.

962
00:44:24,600 --> 00:44:26,800
Speaker 3: I'm from Philly, like girl, we feel Philly used to

963
00:44:26,880 --> 00:44:29,600
Speaker 3: dress good and I remember my like cousin she lived

964
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 3: in West Philly and Westley girls really implay you had

965
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:36,360
Speaker 3: to really come correct. I don't know, like that's like

966
00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:39,239
Speaker 3: because to me I am, I take a lot of

967
00:44:39,360 --> 00:44:43,399
Speaker 3: risks and I wear everything from like the high end,

968
00:44:43,480 --> 00:44:45,520
Speaker 3: Like I'm very like quote unquote high love from row

969
00:44:45,560 --> 00:44:50,160
Speaker 3: House out of Atlanta. I don't really have like I

970
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:53,399
Speaker 3: don't know, cringeworthy, like my mama would cringe at half

971
00:44:53,440 --> 00:44:54,960
Speaker 3: the stuff I wear because I'll be having on my

972
00:44:55,040 --> 00:45:02,080
Speaker 3: breastyle and stuff. But works. Yeah, I feel like I've

973
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:03,839
Speaker 3: been I will say, since I turned thirty five, I've

974
00:45:03,840 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 3: been having this moment where it's like, oh, titties out

975
00:45:05,719 --> 00:45:09,520
Speaker 3: and like all my dresses. So that's I feel I remember,

976
00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:12,959
Speaker 3: I have a picture of my screen of my phone.

977
00:45:13,040 --> 00:45:14,600
Speaker 3: I'm like, what's that is all you wanted to see this?

978
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:20,400
Speaker 3: I feel like that's like my main trend right now.

979
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:22,319
Speaker 3: It was like five things where my breasts are out

980
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:24,200
Speaker 3: and I ain't got no car to be like you know,

981
00:45:24,360 --> 00:45:27,440
Speaker 3: like implant so they still sit up. But I'm like,

982
00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:29,560
Speaker 3: that's just like my new things. I turned thirty five,

983
00:45:29,840 --> 00:45:32,000
Speaker 3: being daring in that way. But I think that just

984
00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:34,640
Speaker 3: makes my mama cringe because you know, she's your past

985
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:35,800
Speaker 3: of life, So I don't.

986
00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:43,080
Speaker 1: Know, embracing your body and embracing and embracing who you are.

987
00:45:43,360 --> 00:45:43,960
Speaker 3: I love it.

988
00:45:44,080 --> 00:45:47,080
Speaker 2: Hell yeah, all right now, doctor Joryan, what is your

989
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:48,920
Speaker 2: biggest guilty pleasure.

990
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:54,040
Speaker 3: Watching Rochet TV? Oh my gosh, I kind of like,

991
00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:55,520
Speaker 3: you know, I don't do the Love and Hip Hop.

992
00:45:55,560 --> 00:45:57,120
Speaker 3: I don't do the Basketball Wives. It's a little too

993
00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:58,400
Speaker 3: much for me because I just kind of feel like

994
00:45:58,440 --> 00:45:59,960
Speaker 3: it was cute when it started, but now it's just

995
00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:02,960
Speaker 3: like you can't do twenty seasons of this. Yeah, but

996
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:06,120
Speaker 3: I still love Real Housewives of Atlanta. I still love

997
00:46:06,200 --> 00:46:08,480
Speaker 3: Married to Medicine. I love those shows because these are

998
00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:11,799
Speaker 3: women who have like some love of expertise or some

999
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:14,319
Speaker 3: level of a career, some level you know, like you're

1000
00:46:14,440 --> 00:46:16,080
Speaker 3: doing something. I feel like the hard part for me

1001
00:46:16,120 --> 00:46:17,440
Speaker 3: with a lot of the other shows is like, you know,

1002
00:46:17,880 --> 00:46:20,120
Speaker 3: it's hard for me to watch you know, somebody just

1003
00:46:20,120 --> 00:46:22,719
Speaker 3: being someone's girlfriend and like getting no variety from that.

1004
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:25,279
Speaker 3: But I feel like having being someone in your own

1005
00:46:25,360 --> 00:46:27,680
Speaker 3: right and just like whether it be like I sell Wes,

1006
00:46:28,800 --> 00:46:31,799
Speaker 3: you know, like being a model and being excellent at that.

1007
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:33,640
Speaker 3: You know. I think that's what I love about those

1008
00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:35,880
Speaker 3: shows is seeing like these black women living their best

1009
00:46:35,920 --> 00:46:38,160
Speaker 3: lives and like, for me, like someone like I love

1010
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:40,400
Speaker 3: is like Quad on merrit To Medicine. She was a

1011
00:46:40,520 --> 00:46:43,400
Speaker 3: you know, someone's wife, and she like was like, oh no,

1012
00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:44,959
Speaker 3: I'm not going to just be your wife. I'm also

1013
00:46:45,000 --> 00:46:46,600
Speaker 3: going to be these things. And like they it begins

1014
00:46:46,560 --> 00:46:49,880
Speaker 3: divorced and good things. She's like cultivated herself because she

1015
00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:53,120
Speaker 3: came out of the marriage and still has herself. So

1016
00:46:53,239 --> 00:46:55,880
Speaker 3: I think you still give me so much like inspiration

1017
00:46:55,920 --> 00:46:57,600
Speaker 3: because it's just so great to see so many different

1018
00:46:57,640 --> 00:47:00,520
Speaker 3: black women from different walks of life, like it's ruling

1019
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:02,279
Speaker 3: it on TV, like and I just love it. I

1020
00:47:02,440 --> 00:47:04,440
Speaker 3: don't know, it's just that's like, you know, I just

1021
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:06,320
Speaker 3: love like talking like my mom will call me to

1022
00:47:06,360 --> 00:47:08,920
Speaker 3: talk Real Housewives at atonement, Like it's like it becomes

1023
00:47:08,960 --> 00:47:11,200
Speaker 3: like you know your girlfriends you're talking about. So I

1024
00:47:11,200 --> 00:47:14,239
Speaker 3: don't know reality TV really is like I don't tell

1025
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:15,719
Speaker 3: people a lot how much I watch it, but I

1026
00:47:15,800 --> 00:47:19,799
Speaker 3: watch it. Well now we know, now we know, because

1027
00:47:19,800 --> 00:47:21,600
Speaker 3: I don't know. This last question, I have to say,

1028
00:47:21,600 --> 00:47:23,520
Speaker 3: I keep it caring with my patience because I like,

1029
00:47:23,920 --> 00:47:25,960
Speaker 3: I am really big on put it in pop culture

1030
00:47:26,000 --> 00:47:28,200
Speaker 3: references during you know, like I always tell people like

1031
00:47:28,200 --> 00:47:32,080
Speaker 3: it's cuffing season. Time to get contraception, like and it works.

1032
00:47:32,719 --> 00:47:35,920
Speaker 3: You got to they are you know, you can't interested

1033
00:47:35,960 --> 00:47:37,920
Speaker 3: in No, it's like it's cuting season.

1034
00:47:37,960 --> 00:47:41,520
Speaker 2: Girls with exactly you already know what it is, So

1035
00:47:41,560 --> 00:47:43,000
Speaker 2: get that, get that contraceptive.

1036
00:47:44,239 --> 00:47:46,160
Speaker 3: It's about the cold. I got to really go in

1037
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:50,439
Speaker 3: in the office. I love it. I love it.

1038
00:47:50,640 --> 00:47:54,960
Speaker 1: So how can just anyone who because at this point

1039
00:47:55,040 --> 00:47:58,640
Speaker 1: now like there's women from around the world who will

1040
00:47:58,680 --> 00:48:02,120
Speaker 1: be listening to this, how can they stay in touch

1041
00:48:02,160 --> 00:48:02,360
Speaker 1: with you?

1042
00:48:02,640 --> 00:48:05,480
Speaker 3: So I am on Instagram. I'm not really a Facebook

1043
00:48:05,560 --> 00:48:08,360
Speaker 3: person or I kind of like have shied away from Facebook,

1044
00:48:08,520 --> 00:48:10,239
Speaker 3: and I'm not really a Twitter person, but I am

1045
00:48:10,280 --> 00:48:13,080
Speaker 3: on Instagram at th h E d R j O

1046
00:48:13,239 --> 00:48:18,640
Speaker 3: Y at the Doctor Joy And I would say medically, however,

1047
00:48:18,719 --> 00:48:21,080
Speaker 3: I end I have a startup named Culturecare where we

1048
00:48:21,160 --> 00:48:25,040
Speaker 3: are connecting black women with physicians online and basically you

1049
00:48:25,040 --> 00:48:28,680
Speaker 3: could do a telemedicine encounter all online and just pay cash.

1050
00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:30,480
Speaker 3: It doesn't matter what your insurance is. Just matters what

1051
00:48:30,520 --> 00:48:33,120
Speaker 3: state you're in. So we're starting in California and starting

1052
00:48:33,440 --> 00:48:36,480
Speaker 3: in the next month. And if you're not in California

1053
00:48:36,520 --> 00:48:39,280
Speaker 3: you're interested in potentially being my patient one day, please

1054
00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:42,640
Speaker 3: go to our website, ourculturrecare dot com and just hit

1055
00:48:42,719 --> 00:48:44,360
Speaker 3: the get started so we can, you know, put in

1056
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:46,000
Speaker 3: your name in your state and we'll contact you and

1057
00:48:46,040 --> 00:48:49,000
Speaker 3: we're your state. So yeah, all.

1058
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:51,319
Speaker 1: Right, And if for someone who is in the Bay

1059
00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:56,480
Speaker 1: Area and wants to be your patient, how can they find.

1060
00:48:56,360 --> 00:48:59,440
Speaker 3: I am a physician at Highland Hospital. But what that

1061
00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:02,359
Speaker 3: means is that I see patients who have medical and

1062
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:05,319
Speaker 3: like I'll hit a liance and all that. So if

1063
00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:07,360
Speaker 3: you are one of those people and you are on

1064
00:49:08,560 --> 00:49:11,520
Speaker 3: like medical, like I can definitely see you at Highland Hospital.

1065
00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:13,280
Speaker 3: Just call and say you want to see doctor Cooper.

1066
00:49:14,360 --> 00:49:16,760
Speaker 3: I think it's by ones. There are four three seven

1067
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:20,719
Speaker 3: eighty five hundred. However, it's kind of hard to see

1068
00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:22,800
Speaker 3: people if you if you don't have that insurance and

1069
00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:24,520
Speaker 3: you want to see me, it's gonna be Culture Care

1070
00:49:25,280 --> 00:49:28,920
Speaker 3: our culturecare dot com because it doesn't matter what insurance

1071
00:49:28,920 --> 00:49:31,640
Speaker 3: you are on that whereas like I definitely have permitted

1072
00:49:31,640 --> 00:49:36,200
Speaker 3: my main career to helping undeserved populations. So if you

1073
00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:39,280
Speaker 3: got a good insurance, sorry you got to hit the cash.

1074
00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:41,719
Speaker 3: But it's the simple parts of a kope, So don't

1075
00:49:41,719 --> 00:49:44,520
Speaker 3: be shy. Okay, thanks for joy.

1076
00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:46,880
Speaker 2: You're so awesome. Thank you so much for joining us today.

1077
00:49:46,880 --> 00:49:49,000
Speaker 2: This was so amazing. I think it's so important to

1078
00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:51,439
Speaker 2: have a woman like you, with your experience and even

1079
00:49:51,440 --> 00:49:54,480
Speaker 2: like the cultural references, just your swag being in this

1080
00:49:54,600 --> 00:49:57,239
Speaker 2: space and showing other young girls that I can still

1081
00:49:57,280 --> 00:50:00,279
Speaker 2: be fly and be on fleek and still you know,

1082
00:50:00,600 --> 00:50:02,400
Speaker 2: be a doctor and serve my community.

1083
00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:05,239
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm just, I'm just I'm done. Drops Mike,

1084
00:50:05,280 --> 00:50:09,600
Speaker 3: You're amazing. They get me, you get me, honestly, that again,

1085
00:50:09,719 --> 00:50:10,920
Speaker 3: like I think that's what I was like. I think

1086
00:50:11,000 --> 00:50:13,200
Speaker 3: my biggest identity beyond being a black woman is being

1087
00:50:13,239 --> 00:50:15,839
Speaker 3: a Philly girl. I honestly like the only reason why

1088
00:50:15,840 --> 00:50:17,399
Speaker 3: I wanted to go to Harvard is because I saw

1089
00:50:17,400 --> 00:50:19,000
Speaker 3: all the people who were going to like m I,

1090
00:50:19,040 --> 00:50:21,600
Speaker 3: T and yell from my high school and they were

1091
00:50:21,640 --> 00:50:24,120
Speaker 3: all like, you know, super nerdy or they were like white,

1092
00:50:24,280 --> 00:50:25,920
Speaker 3: and I was like, oh no, no, no, I got it

1093
00:50:25,960 --> 00:50:28,120
Speaker 3: to a black girl, Like who's like still cool with

1094
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:30,160
Speaker 3: everybody who goes to Harvard and like, yeah, you can

1095
00:50:30,239 --> 00:50:32,399
Speaker 3: do it too, girl. And so I'm just so glad

1096
00:50:32,440 --> 00:50:34,400
Speaker 3: that you get my thesis from like when I was

1097
00:50:34,440 --> 00:50:36,200
Speaker 3: sixteen years old. That's literally what I thought when I

1098
00:50:36,239 --> 00:50:39,240
Speaker 3: was sixteen. It's like I gotta be myself but also

1099
00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 3: still being able to achieve these things so that you know,

1100
00:50:41,640 --> 00:50:44,680
Speaker 3: girls like me know that this is achievable. There we go.

1101
00:50:45,520 --> 00:50:49,000
Speaker 3: I love it. Oh, thank you so much that could no.

1102
00:50:49,120 --> 00:50:51,400
Speaker 3: Thank you, ladies, this has been great.

1103
00:50:52,040 --> 00:50:56,360
Speaker 1: Thank thanks for joining us today in her Space. Please

1104
00:50:56,480 --> 00:51:01,279
Speaker 1: note that I show may contain conversations about self help, advice,

1105
00:51:01,760 --> 00:51:05,080
Speaker 1: self empowerment, and mental health, but it is by no

1106
00:51:05,239 --> 00:51:08,520
Speaker 1: means meant to be a substitute for an ongoing formal

1107
00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:13,319
Speaker 1: relationship with a trained mental health provider. If you or

1108
00:51:13,360 --> 00:51:16,239
Speaker 1: someone you know is in need of mental health care,

1109
00:51:16,760 --> 00:51:21,640
Speaker 1: please visit the Therapy for Black Girls directory Psychology today or

1110
00:51:21,719 --> 00:51:23,360
Speaker 1: contact your insurance provider.

1111
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:25,680
Speaker 2: If you liked what you heard and want to keep

1112
00:51:25,719 --> 00:51:29,080
Speaker 2: the conversation going, connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and

1113
00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:34,239
Speaker 2: Twitter at herspace podcast or check out our website at

1114
00:51:34,239 --> 00:51:38,440
Speaker 2: herspace podcast dot com. And before we meet again, repeat

1115
00:51:38,480 --> 00:51:41,440
Speaker 2: after me. I know that everything is working out for

1116
00:51:41,520 --> 00:51:44,560
Speaker 2: my good, even when things don't go as planned.

1117
00:51:45,120 --> 00:51:46,479
Speaker 3: We'll see you next week, Lady