Speaker 1: If you thought more hours a day, dred minutes a
Speaker 1: week was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants
Speaker 1: of the old Republic, the sole fashion of fairness. He
Speaker 1: treats crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the
Speaker 1: rich pill poppers in the penthouse to clearinghouse of hot
Speaker 1: takes break three for something special. The Fifth Hour with
Speaker 1: Ben Maller starts right now. That it does, and really
Speaker 1: we should call it the first hour, because I haven't
Speaker 1: done the other four hours have been away and and
Speaker 1: technically I would like management to know that this is
Speaker 1: not a day that I am supposed to be doing
Speaker 1: any kind of verbal communication. But this is an emergency
Speaker 1: edition of The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller and unfortunately
Speaker 1: David Gascott, who somehow survived. They very very tenuous week
Speaker 1: and we we thought. I thought, I spent the weekend
Speaker 1: in Seattle hanging out with the Mallard militia, and I'm
Speaker 1: not scheduled to return to the radio show until next week,
Speaker 1: right because of New Year's and all that stuff. So
Speaker 1: I had some time and I thought, well, my memory
Speaker 1: is not that good. I'll probably forget everything. I'll probably
Speaker 1: forget everything. By the time I come back on the radio,
Speaker 1: and plus that we've got wild card playoff games that
Speaker 1: pretty much are gonna swallow up everything I talk about
Speaker 1: on the show. So I figured to give this Mallard
Speaker 1: Meet and Greet the proper, proper credit it deserves. It
Speaker 1: was a marvelous weekend. It was breathtaking at times, be dazzling,
Speaker 1: some would say even astonishing the way that it went
Speaker 1: this weekend. So this is an emergency special edition podcast.
Speaker 1: Most of it will be about the Mallard Meet and
Speaker 1: Greet and then the Mallardman March, the Mallard Palooza, whatever
Speaker 1: you wanna call it, that took place this weekend all
Speaker 1: over the greater Seattle area. And uh, I am excited, guess.
Speaker 1: And I just got by just not that long ago
Speaker 1: to Los Angeles and we are back ready to knock
Speaker 1: it out of the park. It would be stupefying. I'm
Speaker 1: a little I'm actually, I'm not gonna lie. I'm a
Speaker 1: little flattered that you broke off your vacation plans to
Speaker 1: uh to bring me back in UH for a new
Speaker 1: for a new day, a new year, UH in a
Speaker 1: new decade of of podcasting. So that's right. I forgot
Speaker 1: about that. This is where they We're heading into a
Speaker 1: new decade of broadcast now. Man, So you know, I
Speaker 1: started in radio just last decade, so this is only
Speaker 1: gonna be my second decade in radio unless unless it's
Speaker 1: not well, it's it's nice. I know you had a
Speaker 1: lot of the the alarms, the fire alarms, the panic
Speaker 1: alarms when you're in Seattle about not listening to weekend radio,
Speaker 1: and some people ratted me out, uh and made some
Speaker 1: things publicized. Uh so I thought, you know what, you
Speaker 1: come back home? You missed me. I'm Ryan Shotgun and
Speaker 1: yet again and uh my seat is not taken. So
Speaker 1: here I am. And well I will be providing a
Speaker 1: regal a noble podcast, and then you will be providing
Speaker 1: the laugh track is what you will be doing. I believe.
Speaker 1: I think that's how that's gonna go. But I'm excited.
Speaker 1: And like I said, we're mostly gonna cover what happened
Speaker 1: this weekend. People have a lot of questions. I was
Speaker 1: getting a lot of questions on Twitter, on the Facebook.
Speaker 1: People wanted to know about certain things and all that.
Speaker 1: So I figured, why not just spill my guts right here?
Speaker 1: And because this podcast, I always say guest gard is
Speaker 1: for like the super fans of the show, right, this
Speaker 1: is for like regular listeners will consume the radio show.
Speaker 1: But you really have to go out of your way
Speaker 1: to hear this show, right, and so we thank those
Speaker 1: of you that have taken the time. And you know
Speaker 1: you're listening right now, so you know who you are
Speaker 1: uh to be here. And we're about to annihilate the podcast,
Speaker 1: so I think we should get to it now. We'll
Speaker 1: have most of it, Yeah, we gotta you can't. You
Speaker 1: have to hold on? What am I gonna hold on
Speaker 1: to it? You're gonna hold on to a total because
Speaker 1: to start off the podcast in nineteen, we made a
Speaker 1: gentleman's bet that you eventually paid up for the number
Speaker 1: of downloads that we would have the first month of
Speaker 1: of September. I believe, and I I actually heavily valued
Speaker 1: the public to chime in too download and to listen.
Speaker 1: And they did. That's why I want that's that's not no,
Speaker 1: that's not had nothing to do with it. But this
Speaker 1: podcast that had nothing to do with it. You know,
Speaker 1: this podcast you are trying to overvalue now your public
Speaker 1: into downloads. So I am very confident now I I
Speaker 1: don't you know. I'm gonna double down on this guest.
Speaker 1: Get on. I'm gonna hitch my wagon to this podcast.
Speaker 1: And the reason why, okay, is because I have heard
Speaker 1: from a number of big fans of the show what
Speaker 1: a scumbag and loser I am for not being on
Speaker 1: the radio the last you know, a few days I've
Speaker 1: been away and they've just been giving me the business.
Speaker 1: They're attacking everyone. I feel bad for the people that
Speaker 1: have been sitting in for me. They're good people. They're
Speaker 1: getting destroyed. They're just getting clawbered and pummeled by the
Speaker 1: militia who are angry. I calm down, It's okay. The
Speaker 1: world's not gonna come to it. I'm not fired. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be back. I I had some time off because
Speaker 1: I I worked all year, and so we're back at it.
Speaker 1: I mean, there's no need to put anybody into a
Speaker 1: wood chipper gas guy. Okay. Well, these people that are
Speaker 1: filling in are getting paid, right, I believe they are
Speaker 1: getting paid the professional broadcast. And the other question is
Speaker 1: who the funk takes vacation during football season. Well, I'll
Speaker 1: tell you, well, I'll tell you what. Somebody who doesn't
Speaker 1: take any days off all year, asshole. That's who takes
Speaker 1: time off at the end of the year. And if
Speaker 1: you have a problem, contact my wife. That's who you
Speaker 1: should contact. Because I gotta tell you I was jonesing
Speaker 1: to get back on the radio a little bit, but
Speaker 1: you know, I got family commitments I gotta do. So
Speaker 1: how you how we unfolding this thing, because it's gonna
Speaker 1: be like a Guy Ritchie movie where you go from
Speaker 1: backwards to the beginning, or are you gonna start to fit?
Speaker 1: And I'll start at the beginning. I mean, I think
Speaker 1: that's where we should start, and I'll kind of work
Speaker 1: my way through and we have some time at the
Speaker 1: end we can do some of our regular bits like
Speaker 1: study this and uh, and you know, don't stick to
Speaker 1: sports and things like that. But I guess you should
Speaker 1: probably start at the beginning where I got a well,
Speaker 1: I guess originally if you're gonna go way back in
Speaker 1: the hot tub time machine. Uh. The origin of this
Speaker 1: whole meet and greet in Seattle actually started in Phoenix.
Speaker 1: Our buddy Lee in Phoenix showed up to an Arizona
Speaker 1: Cardinals game, and remember he had a sign duke can't
Speaker 1: spell idiot. Wow. I mean, the guy is a p one.
Speaker 1: He went out of his way. I think that made
Speaker 1: the sign more memorable that he butchered some words in there.
Speaker 1: I don't know how to spell either. That's why I
Speaker 1: wanted to radio. But anyway, the guy, I mean a
Speaker 1: big Fanli's been used to call the show all the time.
Speaker 1: He he still occasionally will call in. He's I don't
Speaker 1: think he's doing the overnights anymore. So he's like a
Speaker 1: former overnight guy. And he had a sign and it
Speaker 1: was like he had alligator arms Murray on the sign
Speaker 1: and all. That was really cool. It was really neat.
Speaker 1: And then that inspired ed from a spoke Can and
Speaker 1: Christina from spoke Can and they showed up to a
Speaker 1: Seahawks game against the Saints and they had some signs
Speaker 1: and they were out in front and they were doing
Speaker 1: it and trying to get people to listen to the
Speaker 1: show at Century Link Field. And then they said, you
Speaker 1: know we're gonna go back. You know we're gonna do it.
Speaker 1: We're gonna have a you know, a Mallard get together
Speaker 1: at the end of December twenty nineteen. You know, they
Speaker 1: talked about for a couple of months and then Jay
Speaker 1: Scoop got involved. Jesse, the great winner of the Talent
Speaker 1: Show the back to back years, he got involved. He
Speaker 1: really wanted to make it happen, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm not going you know, I didn't. I didn't think
Speaker 1: it would be able to do it. And they they
Speaker 1: rolled out the red carpet. They went above and beyond
Speaker 1: Jay Scoop in particular to make sure that it happens.
Speaker 1: So big thanks to to Jesse to as I said,
Speaker 1: Jay Scoop, his girlfriend Megan uh ed from Spokane. His
Speaker 1: lady friend there, Christina, the Seattle chapter of the Mallam Militia.
Speaker 1: I mean it was rose pedals, is what it was, Guesstcan.
Speaker 1: I mean I have the cleanest took us in the
Speaker 1: world here. I mean, my my head is the size
Speaker 1: the size of the mountains around Seattle. There it was.
Speaker 1: It was crazy. It was wonderful and peeling back the
Speaker 1: curtain a little bit. Your wife told me a secret
Speaker 1: once that you do not like to be filed or
Speaker 1: made field uncomfortable. Yes, that, why don't I think most
Speaker 1: people don't want to feel uncomfortable. Uncomfortable situations make you awkward.
Speaker 1: So with that being said, how did they exactly wrought
Speaker 1: out the red carpet for you, in particular Jay Scoop, Well, well,
Speaker 1: Jay Scoop made sure I got up there. That was
Speaker 1: the main part. Uh, he made sure. How did he
Speaker 1: do that? Well, it was you know, he and you know,
Speaker 1: maybe some other people. I don't know exactly the logistics
Speaker 1: on this, but there was a a plane ticket that
Speaker 1: might or might not have been purchased, and so I
Speaker 1: I had a chance to fly up there. Chartered flight. No,
Speaker 1: not close, but not a chartered flight. It was close
Speaker 1: to a chartered flight, but it was I mean, people
Speaker 1: were in the section that you were sitting on your flight,
Speaker 1: very few, very few people in my section. And might
Speaker 1: I add free WiFi, leg room things I'm not used
Speaker 1: to when flying gascon. I've flown hundreds of flights over
Speaker 1: my life. This is one of the few occasions I
Speaker 1: have had the v I P treatment that, you know,
Speaker 1: would you like a nice eggs for breakfast or something
Speaker 1: like that? And I said, no, I'm fast thing, but
Speaker 1: thank you very much, and free booze and all that
Speaker 1: and five minute flight. Actually, you know, on the way
Speaker 1: back it was only like two hours. This is disgusting.
Speaker 1: It was wonderful, unbelievable. It was. It was an outpouring
Speaker 1: of love. It was an avalanche of goodwill from from
Speaker 1: Jay Scoop and all of the people. I assume it
Speaker 1: mostly was him, but whoever else was behind it. Wonderful great.
Speaker 1: I love Seattle. I had not been to Seattle since
Speaker 1: I was doing stuff with the Dodgers years ago, before
Speaker 1: I became a full bloviating gas bag. Back then, I
Speaker 1: was just a Dodger apologist only and uh, and we
Speaker 1: were doing Dodger talk and they were playing the Mariners,
Speaker 1: and they had a Rod still on the Mariners long
Speaker 1: that was uh, not only Ja Buner was on the team,
Speaker 1: but a Rod Randy Johnson I think, was still your Martinez. Yeah,
Speaker 1: your Martinez. That like that vintage of the the marriage.
Speaker 1: It was a long time ago. Um, and I, you know,
Speaker 1: I've probably butchered that. Maybe I'm you know, some of
Speaker 1: those guys were gone, but as I remember it, they
Speaker 1: were all there. As I remember it, they were all
Speaker 1: hanging out. So they rolled out the red carpet for you,
Speaker 1: and in return, you gave them a lifetime supply of
Speaker 1: absolutely fucking no, no, I gave them a lifetime supply
Speaker 1: of memories. You know, life. I tried to tell you
Speaker 1: this guest gun, but you don't understand. I tell everyone,
Speaker 1: life's all about the stories. All you get is the stories.
Speaker 1: It's the places you go, the people you meet in life.
Speaker 1: That's what it's all about. No, I'm not the most
Speaker 1: social person. I'm an introvert. You know. I hide behind
Speaker 1: the microphone, I hide behind the radio. I openly admit that.
Speaker 1: But occasionally I can get out there and I can
Speaker 1: you know, I have. I have my moments when I'm
Speaker 1: heavily caffeinated where I can bounce around and whatnot. But
Speaker 1: the Seattle's I know you've been a Seattle bunch. But
Speaker 1: for those that you know a lot of our listeners
Speaker 1: are not in Seattle and they're all over the country.
Speaker 1: Maybe we'll never go to Seattle. But it was. It
Speaker 1: was wonderful. You know, it's known for the rain. It
Speaker 1: only rained briefly. I was there, you know, a few
Speaker 1: days over the weekend and it just rained a little bit.
Speaker 1: It was in the temperatures and the forties, low forties,
Speaker 1: and uh I flew on on Saturday. Now, I gotta
Speaker 1: tell you, this is a classic Mallard maneuver. When I
Speaker 1: flew into the Seattle Tacoma airport because I was gonna
Speaker 1: uber to the hotel. And then I kept seeing these
Speaker 1: signs at the airport that said, hey, you know, take
Speaker 1: the light rail into downtown, all right, And I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm gonna, I'm gonna go a little venture.
Speaker 1: You know, I I like, I actually like public transportation.
Speaker 1: Who does not enjoy the smell of fresh urine on
Speaker 1: a train is right every city you go to, and
Speaker 1: I so I I I figured I could get away
Speaker 1: with it because my wife, who hates public transportation and
Speaker 1: doesn't you know it, does not like using it at all. Um,
Speaker 1: she wasn't around. I was by myself. So I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna jump on the train and I'm gonna enjoy
Speaker 1: the hell. I'm gonna check out the sights and sounds
Speaker 1: and let's see how the people live in Seattle. So
Speaker 1: I jumped on the train, and of course I got
Speaker 1: off at the wrong stop. I thought the hotel I
Speaker 1: was staying at was closer to the stop I got
Speaker 1: off at. And then I was like, you know, I
Speaker 1: could have stayed on the train. But it was one
Speaker 1: of those things, was like the honor system, and I
Speaker 1: had a ticket, but I didn't have a ticket to
Speaker 1: go to the stop I needed to go to. So
Speaker 1: I was like, well, wouldn't it be amazing if, like
Speaker 1: the first hour I'm in Seattle, I get a citation
Speaker 1: for for not having paid my fare on the train.
Speaker 1: Wouldn't that be wonderful? And so I just got off
Speaker 1: and I walked. It was like a nice, nice, brisk
Speaker 1: two mile walk or three mile walk, whatever it was.
Speaker 1: I used Google Maps and the veteran move here guests gun.
Speaker 1: I used headphones with Google Maps because all the homeless
Speaker 1: people of Seattle were asking me for money, but I
Speaker 1: had met headphones in so I was I, I can't
Speaker 1: hear guy with it walk A guy with a net
Speaker 1: worth of three million dollars can't hear you know? That's
Speaker 1: internet bullshit? Is that its internet and bullshit? So the
Speaker 1: train for Seattle, what do they go? Because we had
Speaker 1: Chicago's the L Train, Boston's the T. It doesn't go
Speaker 1: very far that it goes from the airport to the
Speaker 1: University of Washington, and I'm told they were telling me
Speaker 1: it's going to expand in the next couple of years
Speaker 1: and go further north. But it doesn't go very far.
Speaker 1: I'm a little surprised. I thought someone like yourself, it's
Speaker 1: pretty damn frugal, would have taken the shuttle because typically
Speaker 1: so it's els will have shuttle service that's pretty much
Speaker 1: free of charge. Yeah. I didn't even think about that.
Speaker 1: I didn't think job by me, bud, job by me.
Speaker 1: But uh yeah. So I got to the hotel, I
Speaker 1: checked in, and they get I got in there before
Speaker 1: checking time. They gave me a room, thank god, put
Speaker 1: my crap in the room, and then proceeded to wander
Speaker 1: around more. I got a lot of walking, a lot
Speaker 1: of a lot of exercise around Seattle there and I
Speaker 1: hit some of the tourist traps and that famous fish
Speaker 1: market and all that where everyone goes and takes their
Speaker 1: picture and and uh one of the iconic spots. And
Speaker 1: it was wonderful. It was a great day. The weather
Speaker 1: was not bad. A little cold for me, but you know,
Speaker 1: not too bad. It's it's nice that someone can spend
Speaker 1: five days of luxury in Seattle on vacation. That's just amazing.
Speaker 1: But it was like two days, and I even two
Speaker 1: full days, two days in and out, all right, in
Speaker 1: and out like a fast food chain in and out.
Speaker 1: That's what a trip is all about. Did you eat
Speaker 1: or drink anything good that you can brag about? Um,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm gonna get to some of that. I
Speaker 1: I the game on Sunday. We had a really nice restaurant.
Speaker 1: I thought it was pretty good. Next time I'm in Seattle,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna eat there. I didn't eat all that much
Speaker 1: because you know, I have to keep an eye my
Speaker 1: girlish figure guest guy. You know I've been. I was
Speaker 1: a little I was going a little overboard last week
Speaker 1: with the Christmas Hanukah thing going on. So I had
Speaker 1: a lot of craps. I was like, I gotta get
Speaker 1: back on track. I gotta get back on the wagon
Speaker 1: or the wagon is gonna fall over because it's gonna
Speaker 1: be so heavy when I get back on. So but
Speaker 1: but yeah, and and I do recommend for those of
Speaker 1: you that have not been to Seattle, if you if
Speaker 1: you're you know somewhere in Timbuck two or something like that.
Speaker 1: It is one of the hidden gems. And uh, I
Speaker 1: do recommend going in the summer though, Um, you know
Speaker 1: that's just me. But it's it's pretty cool. So as
Speaker 1: far as the meat and greet guest guy. Let's get
Speaker 1: to the good stuff, right. So I flew in on Saturday.
Speaker 1: In the morning, I walked around a lot of the afternoon,
Speaker 1: I got back, I watched the well, I listened to
Speaker 1: the Oklahoma what would you call what happened to? Oklahoma
Speaker 1: would have a bombardment. I would equate that to a spanking.
Speaker 1: That was that's like, father and son, you did something wrong.
Speaker 1: We just beat your ask for a quick minute. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was a blitz Creek situation. Right, that's uh turbo,
Speaker 1: let's go turbo time and all that stuff and anyway,
Speaker 1: So I watched some of that, but I listened to
Speaker 1: on the radio rather on my my headphones. I was
Speaker 1: walking around, so I was very I didn't have to
Speaker 1: talk to anybody. Had that going on. And then I
Speaker 1: got back to watch because I wanted to watch the
Speaker 1: Clemson Ohio State game, but I could only watch like
Speaker 1: the first half because we had the meet and greet
Speaker 1: was at seven thirties Seattle time on Saturday. So we
Speaker 1: got together at to McCoy's firehouse Barn Grill, which is
Speaker 1: a cool place. Jay Scoop and his girlfriend Megan. They
Speaker 1: actually they did some some recon and they found this place,
Speaker 1: so I but they were staying at the hotel. I
Speaker 1: was dans so we we took an Uber over to
Speaker 1: the restaurant. Now the funny thing, guest gun, you know
Speaker 1: socially how to act. Of course I'm better than you,
Speaker 1: but by anyway, Jay Scoop was like, you know, he
Speaker 1: was really the big planner and he did a great job.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know, the guy did God's work
Speaker 1: here to put this together. Um, and he he wanted
Speaker 1: to get there early, right because he had he had
Speaker 1: made contact with all these fans of the show, and
Speaker 1: he wanted to make sure he was there early. And
Speaker 1: of course we ended up. I screwed up the Uber.
Speaker 1: I had not used Uber since like April, and uh,
Speaker 1: I screwed it up and we had to cancel one ride.
Speaker 1: We finally got a guy that picked us up, and
Speaker 1: uh so we ended up showing up fashionably late to
Speaker 1: the shin dig and I walked in hand to God
Speaker 1: to a hornet's nest. Guest gun. All right, so I
Speaker 1: don't know what to expect, you know, Jay Scoops like, well,
Speaker 1: a certain number of people said they were gonna be there,
Speaker 1: and I told them, and we we talked about this.
Speaker 1: I said, listen, I've done these things. Unfortunately, I've been
Speaker 1: able to meet listeners of the show in different cities.
Speaker 1: And what happens is they all a lot of people
Speaker 1: say I'm gonna go, and then they can't go, and
Speaker 1: then other people that have no you don't even have
Speaker 1: their name mentioned, they then decided to show up at
Speaker 1: the last minute. You never know who's gonna be there. Right,
Speaker 1: It's kind of like your Christmas party. That's true. That's
Speaker 1: that's that's that's a very good example at the same concept. Right,
Speaker 1: the people. Well, and then you don't, you know, people
Speaker 1: have lives to live and they don't always want to,
Speaker 1: you know, go there and be all that be part
Speaker 1: of the event. Anyway. So uh, I walk in, all right,
Speaker 1: we park, We get it, went in park, We took
Speaker 1: an uber, got out of the uber right in front
Speaker 1: of the restaurant. I opened the door, opened the door
Speaker 1: up fashionly late, and as soon as the doors opened,
Speaker 1: the entire and I'm not exaggerating, the entire left side
Speaker 1: of McCoy's firehouse breaks out into applause and cheering, shouting
Speaker 1: my name all right, Oh my god, I was so embarrassed.
Speaker 1: I was overwhelmed. It was a big introvert guestc on
Speaker 1: and uh my goodness, yeah this is chid my name.
Speaker 1: I never you know, I don't know these people are
Speaker 1: and uh, you know, it really pushed my schmoozing skills
Speaker 1: to the limit. I'm embarrassed. I'm embarrassed to do this
Speaker 1: podcast right now. Why are you embarrassed? This is a
Speaker 1: wonderful podcast. This is a great podcast. J Scoop did
Speaker 1: all this hard work. Yeah, he should be on the podcasts.
Speaker 1: And and he gets this. He gets Ben Maller walking
Speaker 1: through into a bar slash restaurant with a rounding ovation
Speaker 1: that's falling. Well, I I would have been cheering. I
Speaker 1: was cheering for Jay Scoop, and I think they should
Speaker 1: have been sharing for Jay Scoop as well. But we
Speaker 1: I gotta tell you, and I think you know, Jesse
Speaker 1: A K. J. Scoop would agree with me. We probably
Speaker 1: had about double the crowd we expect, all right, so
Speaker 1: the bar so when it was much bigger than we
Speaker 1: anticipated going into the event. All right, So the way
Speaker 1: that you were received was great. But I'm curious, because
Speaker 1: of the audience that was there, did you have any
Speaker 1: females jump on you, or did you have any guys
Speaker 1: take off their shirts for you? Like something like this
Speaker 1: probably go down with your fans. There was no nudity,
Speaker 1: although in the past I have signed I have signed
Speaker 1: some body parts in the past at these things, but
Speaker 1: I did not. And there were there were some beautiful
Speaker 1: women there and some you know, they were with their
Speaker 1: boyfriends mostly uh uh and whatnot. So it was it
Speaker 1: was cool. It was cool, cool, hey out everybody, And
Speaker 1: like I said, it was a lot more people than
Speaker 1: we expected. A lot of people changed their plans. They
Speaker 1: were telling me they'd stopped, you know, stopped in at
Speaker 1: the last minute. And it was a little helter skelter
Speaker 1: because some people showed up early. A lot of people
Speaker 1: showed up early, and then some people to leave, and
Speaker 1: then other people would show up. And I am happy, though, guest,
Speaker 1: because I had a chance, I believe, and maybe I didn't.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm of somebody, but I think I talked to
Speaker 1: pretty much everybody at some point, one on one, and
Speaker 1: I feel like it was the perfect amount of people.
Speaker 1: It was not too many, so I couldn't talk to everybody.
Speaker 1: It wasn't too few where I would have felt felt
Speaker 1: like a complete loser because only like two people show up,
Speaker 1: so it wasn't like that. And we used the City
Speaker 1: of Chicago crowd counting measurement, so I think we had
Speaker 1: about five million people that showed up. I think you'd
Speaker 1: agree a Coise firehouse just like the Cups parade about
Speaker 1: five million people. It was one of the largest gatherings
Speaker 1: of humanity in the history of the Pacific Northwest. And
Speaker 1: I will say I'm proud of you because there's only
Speaker 1: twice in my time that that I have purposely blown
Speaker 1: up your phone and received no radio response. The first
Speaker 1: time was when your gallbladder was removed and you're on
Speaker 1: your deathbed. Yes, and you were making jokes about me
Speaker 1: while I was in surgery. Might I add, well you
Speaker 1: were you were with good friends at that time, couple,
Speaker 1: and as uh, several people pointed out at the shindig,
Speaker 1: you were the reason my gallbladder imploded on this podcast
Speaker 1: when you asked if I had ever had any kind
Speaker 1: of major medical procedure. Uh. And then days later I
Speaker 1: ended up in the emergency room. Thank you, because I
Speaker 1: was with you in your twenties making you swallow ten
Speaker 1: thousand calories a day after, you were there in spirit.
Speaker 1: You were at Tommy's when I was eating cheeseburgers and
Speaker 1: chili cheese fries and the whole thing at two in
Speaker 1: the morning. Yes, you were the reason, well at least
Speaker 1: at this event. While I was blowing you up, I
Speaker 1: didn't get any response, so I knew you were in
Speaker 1: good hands and you were actually circulating around the room
Speaker 1: and being rather different from your normal self. You were
Speaker 1: being engaging. So I'm I'm applauding you for that. More
Speaker 1: so J School, Jay Scoop and his girlfriend for doing that,
Speaker 1: and uh, getting you out of the house, getting you
Speaker 1: out of your bubbles. I know I have not gone anywhere.
Speaker 1: I didn't last week we had a my wife calls
Speaker 1: it a staycation, not a vacation, a staycation and all that.
Speaker 1: So it was cool and and uh, you know, like
Speaker 1: I said, I know, I'm gonna leave several people out
Speaker 1: because my apologies in advance, but I didn't. I didn't
Speaker 1: take notes here, but I'm trying to, you know, go
Speaker 1: through and remember everyone that was there, some of the
Speaker 1: people that you might recognize from listening to the radio show.
Speaker 1: And I guess that we'll start with J. J. From Renton,
Speaker 1: who is famous not only on my show, but he
Speaker 1: has made some crazy calls to Clay Travis's show. And
Speaker 1: j J, who had studied radio in the past and
Speaker 1: all that good guy, big personality. He brought a whole
Speaker 1: entourage like a boss like he he's like, I'm rolling
Speaker 1: in style. And the funniest thing that JJ said, now,
Speaker 1: there's a couple of things that he did that were
Speaker 1: pretty funny. I love JJ's a good guy man. I
Speaker 1: like him and uh, he told me he stumbled into
Speaker 1: Marshawn Lynch was holding a private party next door to
Speaker 1: where we were doing our our event and the night
Speaker 1: before the game. So apparently beast modes, you know, game
Speaker 1: prep included a party, which explains the why he looked
Speaker 1: like he you should be retired still feast mode. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: He looked old and slow. Uh in the game, but
Speaker 1: JJ was cool. JJ actually put me on the phone
Speaker 1: one point with his nephew, so I had a nice
Speaker 1: conversation with his nine year old nephew that could not
Speaker 1: be there. We talked, we bonded, so at some point
Speaker 1: they might actually come visit us in the studio in
Speaker 1: l A. Robbie the Mariner fan, a Twitter legend, a
Speaker 1: Josh Allen apologist in living color wearing the Trident Mariner
Speaker 1: hat and he had he had full Mariner gear on.
Speaker 1: He showed up. There was great to meet Robbie. I
Speaker 1: even tarnished the Mariner had a lot. I think, you
Speaker 1: know it's the Mariner hat. So I probably increased the
Speaker 1: value because I autographed the Mariner had so that probably
Speaker 1: increased the value. Uh. Jordan's who has been interacting with
Speaker 1: us on Twitter for a long time. Super cool, cool
Speaker 1: guy as well. He was there and uh we about
Speaker 1: some of the crazier things that have happened over the
Speaker 1: years on the show. I'm trying to think who else.
Speaker 1: Danny was there, This guy Danny who's a podcast listener,
Speaker 1: and I actually sat near him and his lady friend Jess,
Speaker 1: and they were right next to me and Lee from Seattle,
Speaker 1: who he gave me his whole story. He Lee used
Speaker 1: to live in Georgia, right guesscan. He was in Georgia
Speaker 1: and he had some lung problem or something like that.
Speaker 1: So they told him, the doctors said you should probably
Speaker 1: move to the Pacific Northwest. He moved to Seattle and
Speaker 1: pressed though According to Lee, I'm probably butchering this, but
Speaker 1: he said, within like a couple of weeks his lungs
Speaker 1: had improved, he had he got off medication, and all
Speaker 1: good on him. That's great. Is he likes Seattle compared
Speaker 1: to Georgia. Yeah, he loves it, man, he he was
Speaker 1: all about it. He's Lee's Also. I love the fact
Speaker 1: that Lee Lee has called up the show and he's
Speaker 1: right there in lockstep with me on our anti astro propaganda, right,
Speaker 1: And I love it, uh when we go back and
Speaker 1: forth about A J. Hinch and the cheating and all
Speaker 1: that up. So so that was pretty cool. And who
Speaker 1: Gordon from Tacoma, the great joke writers, Gordy from Tacoma.
Speaker 1: He got me a really cool book and I actually
Speaker 1: read some of it on the plane ride home back
Speaker 1: to l A. There the it was around the mysteries
Speaker 1: of Washington. Stay now, I'm not talking about D. B. Cooper.
Speaker 1: I'm talking about like infamous crooks, culprits, cutthroats, a lot
Speaker 1: of like bank heighs in the early days of Washington.
Speaker 1: It was pretty cool. Some of those I had not
Speaker 1: heard about, actually most of them I not. I haven't
Speaker 1: gone through the whole book, but the beginning part there.
Speaker 1: I gotta feel like some of those stories will be
Speaker 1: incorporated in a monologue or too. Yeah. I like the
Speaker 1: word cutthroat. I'm gonna have to use that more. That's
Speaker 1: a good word, right, Crooks, culprits, and cutthroats. Like who else?
Speaker 1: David from David lives in Seattle. He he uh, he walked,
Speaker 1: walked around. He was there. He dressed up, He had
Speaker 1: a nice jacket on. He explained to me that you
Speaker 1: don't want to be the worst dress person. It's okay
Speaker 1: to be the best addressed person at an event. And
Speaker 1: he was probably dressed better than anybody else. He worked
Speaker 1: in the aerospace business. He said to me, guestcon, I
Speaker 1: know you're not gonna agree with him that I'm the
Speaker 1: second best sports talker that he's heard. There's some guy,
Speaker 1: and I forget the guy's name from the nineteen eighties
Speaker 1: locally in Seattle, who is better than me? But that
Speaker 1: guy's dead, I think now. And when when he attribute
Speaker 1: that to you having your your vocal surgery vocal surgery, Yeah,
Speaker 1: when you had your your vocal pipes, your your vocal
Speaker 1: cords that were altered altered. Yeah, what do you there?
Speaker 1: I have a premier cream of the crop. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: it stand out from the crowd voice. There's nothing that's
Speaker 1: been but surgically enhanced. We've we've heard old drops from
Speaker 1: you back in the day. Well I started when I
Speaker 1: was seven years old. I don't know about that. That's
Speaker 1: why back eating down in Louisiana, eating second, Gumbo's second
Speaker 1: best radio personality has ever heard? That's right? How great
Speaker 1: is that? That's a ringing endorsement from that guy, David? Right,
Speaker 1: I can't funk with him. He's a he's an engineer.
Speaker 1: It sounds like he's smart. So yeah, you know, David's
Speaker 1: up very well and he uh, he's a big fan.
Speaker 1: I liked it. We had a good time. We were
Speaker 1: we I spent a lot of time with David in
Speaker 1: the march. Also, I am no Stradinis from Twitter, the
Speaker 1: Twitter legend who always bust my balls on Twitter, and
Speaker 1: he showed up and it was actually a normal dude.
Speaker 1: Did anyone come down from Canada? I do not think
Speaker 1: we had any Canadian representation, but I don't. I mean
Speaker 1: they didn't say it, and people from Canada love to
Speaker 1: brag about it, So I don't think we had made
Speaker 1: from Canada, but but I am no Stradidas handed me
Speaker 1: you'd appreciate this. He saw the crowd and he handed
Speaker 1: me hand sanitizers. You said, here, you're gonna need this,
Speaker 1: had me hand sanitizer. He also made that if you
Speaker 1: saw some of the photos that were circulating on social media,
Speaker 1: he made the weed Man sign with the red X
Speaker 1: through weed Man's name as a he wants a weed
Speaker 1: Man free a show. So he made that. That's good.
Speaker 1: So he gave you hand sanitizer. And before you left,
Speaker 1: I gave you condoms because your groupies group yes, your groupies,
Speaker 1: it's uh. I'll give him back to you. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't ever used, so I think you're you're in
Speaker 1: good shape. There. Be sure to catch live editions of
Speaker 1: The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven
Speaker 1: pm Pacific on Fox Sports Radio and the I Heart Radio.
Speaker 1: App Ernesto, Now, how about this guy, arnest Now this
Speaker 1: is you know, Seahawks country and all that. Ernesto came
Speaker 1: up from the bay and he was decked out in
Speaker 1: full forty Niner gear. He had a sweet looking forty
Speaker 1: Niner hat on, he had the jacket, the whole thing.
Speaker 1: I mean, from top to bottom. It was all Niners,
Speaker 1: all the time, and it was it was great. And
Speaker 1: uh he's one of the probably five most hardcore forty
Speaker 1: Niner fans I've ever met. And he works as a
Speaker 1: check this out. This kind of cool job. He works
Speaker 1: as a BART police office a Bay Area rapid trains. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's a there's an old school movie. I don't know
Speaker 1: if you remember it, Wesley Snipes, what are you Harrelson
Speaker 1: and Jennifer Lopez or in a movie called the Money Train,
Speaker 1: which you know, like the armed trucks that we have
Speaker 1: out here in California. Yeah, well they had they had
Speaker 1: bullet trains that were based on the same thing, but
Speaker 1: obviously the rail system and so what are Haralson and
Speaker 1: Wesley Snipes? They were armed guards for for this, you know,
Speaker 1: the stash of of money that's being transport. So that's
Speaker 1: kind of a cool job, right you're down there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean he was telling me, like, I mean, you know,
Speaker 1: in San Francisco right now, unfortunately because of the homeless
Speaker 1: pandemic all over the West coast, I mean, it's imagine
Speaker 1: the BART system is being overwhelmed with crime because of this,
Speaker 1: and so he's very busy, he said. He told me
Speaker 1: he just give me some stories there. And you know
Speaker 1: it didn't name anybody, because you know, you can't tell
Speaker 1: the names when you're in the police. But he's just
Speaker 1: the other day somebody had been shot and he put
Speaker 1: a tourniquet on someone for the first time, he said,
Speaker 1: as a police officer and the guy he made it,
Speaker 1: which is good and all that, but he has some
Speaker 1: really and I'm not a tattoo guy myself gascon because
Speaker 1: I can't commit to anything that long on my body.
Speaker 1: But he had this awesome Candlestick Park tattoo and uh,
Speaker 1: Joe mont You're not famous photo of Joe Montana with
Speaker 1: the phone sitting on the bench, you know what I'm
Speaker 1: talking about. He had that on. Uh really nice art too.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know who did that, but whoever,
Speaker 1: they are talented and that was pretty cool. So does
Speaker 1: he hate that? Does he hate that you call him
Speaker 1: the Santa clarifforty Niners. He didn't mind. He just seem
Speaker 1: to mind. He he gave me a nice gift and
Speaker 1: all that A a patch from from his job. And
Speaker 1: I I told him, I said, you know, my wife
Speaker 1: works at a police department is a dispatcher, so I'll
Speaker 1: try to get her, you know, her to get you
Speaker 1: a patch from her police department. And uh yeah, maybe
Speaker 1: we can get something going here. Gastna get like a
Speaker 1: huge collection. That'd be pretty that'd be pretty neat, like
Speaker 1: the boy Scouts of Americas. Yeah, I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not really in law enforcement, but I
Speaker 1: love the patches, you know, I think that would be
Speaker 1: I liked. I respect law enforcement. I'd like to have
Speaker 1: a few of those. I bet you probably your house
Speaker 1: gas gun and it's filled with that crap, right. Yeah.
Speaker 1: My my dad back in the day, he used to
Speaker 1: with the L A p D. They used to have pins,
Speaker 1: the little pins that you'd see like obviously on your
Speaker 1: on your blazer jacket. My dad would have just a
Speaker 1: thousand pins, especially during the Olympic days here in Los Angeles.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I remember the pin collecting that was going
Speaker 1: on during the Olympics. And I love they had those
Speaker 1: little like the badge, a little small badge. Uh, those
Speaker 1: are really cool. I got a couple of those. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you brother up. You know the story behind that, So
Speaker 1: I guess you've you've laid out a lot about how
Speaker 1: people have really opened their arms for you. I'm not done,
Speaker 1: by the way, I'm I'm I I have a good
Speaker 1: memory here, Well what are you? What are you getting?
Speaker 1: I'm trying to give you a hack proof, uh way
Speaker 1: to to remember these people for the future, because if
Speaker 1: you continue to do this, which it sounds like you will.
Speaker 1: You've activated your Instagram account. So in the future you're
Speaker 1: gonna be able to take pictures with everybody and if
Speaker 1: they're on Instagram or Twitter, you can actually tag them.
Speaker 1: And that's a good idea. Yeah, I should, I should
Speaker 1: probably do that. Yeah, and you have to worry would
Speaker 1: be you know, forgetting their names? Yeah? Well, I mean
Speaker 1: I'm very forgetting I don't. I don't remember Eddie's name
Speaker 1: half the time. You know, it's not here half the time.
Speaker 1: So I mean, anyway, how about Joe show him my
Speaker 1: guy Joe, who some say is my doppel ganger, although
Speaker 1: I don't. There was a photo I think one of
Speaker 1: the photos taken and he was behind me and people
Speaker 1: were like, hey, he looks just like him Mallard, and um,
Speaker 1: I think you know that's a curse. I think he's
Speaker 1: better looking. I think he's better looking at doppelgangers. Then
Speaker 1: what do you who's the other the other ones here?
Speaker 1: Bo Benson? Oh you yeah, People say, I don't think
Speaker 1: that's true. Come on, he's got your figure. Well he's
Speaker 1: a good looking man as far as his figures. You know,
Speaker 1: Husky women like a husky, they do unless they don't. Um, Brianna,
Speaker 1: she was cool. Brianna was there. She actually works for
Speaker 1: a subcontractor for Boeing. She makes airplane parts at night.
Speaker 1: And she's giving me her whole whole story. Now she
Speaker 1: the one complained. But Brianna is a huge soccer fan,
Speaker 1: and so she's trying to get me to talk more soccer,
Speaker 1: you know, football and all that. And I was trying
Speaker 1: to explained to her that I talked soccer every four
Speaker 1: years the World Cup, right, That's when I talked every
Speaker 1: four years when the World Cup comes around. And but
Speaker 1: she loves she goes to the games in Seattle. Yes,
Speaker 1: And she she told me much like myself. You know,
Speaker 1: my family not a sports family. I'm I'm the odd duck.
Speaker 1: You know, I love sports. But um my mom was
Speaker 1: a little bit into it, my dad not really into what.
Speaker 1: My brothers aren't into it at all. I was like
Speaker 1: the only one and she she told me that it
Speaker 1: was similar to for her as well. Her family wasn't
Speaker 1: really into it, so she became a big sports fans.
Speaker 1: They got two up there. They got the soccer or
Speaker 1: they got the Shockers and the Seattle Sounders. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: think she's a Sounders fan of That's pretty cool. That up.
Speaker 1: It's a bad job by you want Gascon He Gascon.
Speaker 1: Brianna was a super sweet, nice and all that wonderful stuff.
Speaker 1: Evan Evan pop by now he was not in the
Speaker 1: group photo. He he has called the show now he's
Speaker 1: he told me, has claimed to famous. He's called the
Speaker 1: show twice and falling asleep both times our home and
Speaker 1: he said he went back to hear himself on the podcast.
Speaker 1: And I asked him, I said, you know, did you snore?
Speaker 1: Because it only makes good talk radio when you snore, right,
Speaker 1: it doesn't make good talk radio, and you're not snoring.
Speaker 1: But but he has a cool job. I don't know
Speaker 1: if he wants me to say the place he works
Speaker 1: or not. I don't want to get him in trouble.
Speaker 1: But he works at a big real estate company that
Speaker 1: has a well known app that I have used when
Speaker 1: I was, you know, looking for real estate back in
Speaker 1: the day. And he's a young guy and I told him,
Speaker 1: I said, listen, I mean you stay, you gotta do
Speaker 1: very well. That's that's a company that's that's going places.
Speaker 1: And uh so he just started there back in July,
Speaker 1: and he said, a very good, good spot for him.
Speaker 1: Hopefully that works out. And uh there were some there
Speaker 1: was a Dodger fan. Their guest got Marcus. How cool
Speaker 1: is this? He made me feel I was very proud.
Speaker 1: He was wearing the Dodger blue cap and he was
Speaker 1: there hanging out and a very nice guy offered to
Speaker 1: buy me a beer and whatnot. And I said, no,
Speaker 1: I gotta keep talking. I gotta keep talking. And uh
Speaker 1: we we stayed. I think we were there probably for
Speaker 1: about four hours roughly. I didn't keep track of the time.
Speaker 1: It seemed like about four hours. The place was kind
Speaker 1: of closing down, and uh, I got it. Also, I
Speaker 1: forgot Jay Scoop and his his lady friend. They're Megan.
Speaker 1: They brought a bunch of Mallard theme gifts like it was.
Speaker 1: It was great and they were like kind of playing
Speaker 1: it was like oodles for noodles, like for Marcel in
Speaker 1: Brooklyn and they had you know, things related to Tammy
Speaker 1: and Montana weed Man, and uh, it was it was.
Speaker 1: It was really thoughtful and nice and cool and all
Speaker 1: that and um and a lot of people were asking
Speaker 1: questions about I get people said, well, what were you
Speaker 1: talking about? But we were you know, fans of the show.
Speaker 1: They want to know what, like Doc Mike was like
Speaker 1: when I met Doc Mike? Or have I ever met
Speaker 1: Cowboy and windsor what's weed Man? Like? I The funny
Speaker 1: thing is that Ed for Smokane and Christina they actually
Speaker 1: hung out with the weed Man, So I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, go talk to go talk to Ed. He
Speaker 1: and they know weed Man and they probably saw him
Speaker 1: do his crack or whatever he does there and then
Speaker 1: had a good time. Um, they're asking about Tammy and Montana.
Speaker 1: You know a lot about Tammy, helmet Man and his roaches,
Speaker 1: Dick and Dayton. A lot of people wondered, is Marcel
Speaker 1: and Brooklyn real, what's that all about? What's going on
Speaker 1: with Wayne from Southey. I told the story to one
Speaker 1: person about how we had run away from Wayne from
Speaker 1: Southey and uh, actually I think I I text our
Speaker 1: friends in Maine because uh yeah, I was. Uh, we
Speaker 1: were going back and forth. I was telling the story
Speaker 1: about how we snuck out of the cask and flagging
Speaker 1: in Boston with Aaliyah and Paul from Maine, and then
Speaker 1: we had blind Scott who was our navigator, and a
Speaker 1: couple of the other people trying to get away from Wayne,
Speaker 1: and so I told that story. There people were asking
Speaker 1: about that, and uh, you know, Blair from Maine was
Speaker 1: brought up a couple of times, and so Chris from Houston,
Speaker 1: of course, and uh oh yeah, oh yeah, that's your
Speaker 1: your your buddy, right a little pist. There were people
Speaker 1: also that, you know, what happened to real tall awkward?
Speaker 1: Is he coming back? I don't know. He just stopped calling.
Speaker 1: I think he has his feelings hurt. He was upset.
Speaker 1: I made one mistake. Guest Guns, we continue this never
Speaker 1: ending story. I know you're loving this, guest Gun. It's
Speaker 1: all about the Mallard Plouza weekend in Seattle, Chartered Flights,
Speaker 1: free alcohol, alight, calm down, cowboy. Right. So during the
Speaker 1: Mallard meet and greet, was I eating bob gans? Was
Speaker 1: I eating beef strogging off? Was I eating chicken kiv? No?
Speaker 1: Feduccini alfreighter. No, I had no feduccini alfredo no none,
Speaker 1: none of that, no, no, no no. I was so busy.
Speaker 1: My mom, may she rest in peace, would be so
Speaker 1: proud of me. All right. I was so busy trying.
Speaker 1: I felt like so guilty, like all these people changed
Speaker 1: their schedules to come hang out with me. You know.
Speaker 1: I was like, I gotta try to say hello to everybody.
Speaker 1: I forgot one very important thing, guess gun as the
Speaker 1: bar was closing down by the time your credit card. No,
Speaker 1: I forgot to eat or drink anything. I am such
Speaker 1: a dummy that uh. And people were I guess, said Marcus,
Speaker 1: and some other people are offering to buy me drinks
Speaker 1: and food and all that stuff. And I kept bouncing
Speaker 1: around from table to table. And I went outside for
Speaker 1: a while. I was hanging out with people, and I
Speaker 1: the only thing I did I didn't not go without.
Speaker 1: I had one drink Lee from Seattle. I ended up
Speaker 1: doing a yeager shot Lee from Seattle to celebrate the
Speaker 1: Mallam Militia get together those of us that stayed to
Speaker 1: the bitter end. Lee bought a round of yeager shots
Speaker 1: uh and Bang bang After he then tried to run
Speaker 1: down Eddie's nicknames, and he forgot some of them. You know.
Speaker 1: I I used to do the nickname Rundown from Garcia
Speaker 1: back in the day, and so Lee was going through
Speaker 1: he was trying to remember and he only forgot. He
Speaker 1: forgot a few of them, and I was like, you know,
Speaker 1: I could have picked it up and said, well, you know,
Speaker 1: Eddie's the we don't use the shuttlecock with sports talking
Speaker 1: to more, but easily you know, Steamboat, Willie Judas, Solid
Speaker 1: Gold Corporate nine to five jar Jar, the Matt f
Speaker 1: Bomber of Sports Fodder, gated Garcia. I could have helped
Speaker 1: him out. I didn't, but we did the shot anyway,
Speaker 1: and it was a double shot of yeager. Are you
Speaker 1: a yeager shot guy? I am? I mean, yeah, if
Speaker 1: someone buys it from me, but I won't seek it out. Well,
Speaker 1: I don't do yeah, yeager, I don't do um what
Speaker 1: else don't I do? There's they don't do a lot
Speaker 1: of things, guest, Well, there's a couple of shots that
Speaker 1: I really don't like. Fireball, I don't do. Yeah. I'm
Speaker 1: just not a fan of shooting anymore. You're over you're
Speaker 1: too old now. You're an old man guest gun. You're
Speaker 1: not cool like me doing shots in the at the
Speaker 1: nighttime hours there here you drink like well, it is
Speaker 1: December of the month. I had the Christmas party on
Speaker 1: the Ugly Sweater party. We had our family, my in
Speaker 1: laws mostly my dad showed up, but mostly my in laws.
Speaker 1: At the holiday party we had so yeah, like three
Speaker 1: times a year, but saw like back to back to back.
Speaker 1: I'm an alcoholic. Now I need to go to a
Speaker 1: or something like that. I didn't get invited to the
Speaker 1: family holiday party. I thought you'd have some some single
Speaker 1: divorces over there, but wow, well you actually we figured
Speaker 1: you struck out. You picked up recline at the at
Speaker 1: this party we had previous, so the fact that you
Speaker 1: were last sawed by Lee, it was very tough. Listen.
Speaker 1: I don't want to disappoint your wife. She knows his
Speaker 1: last two or three years have been on fire, and
Speaker 1: so I decided to, uh, you calm that flame down
Speaker 1: a little bit. So, oh I should I don't know
Speaker 1: if I should say this in the air, but one
Speaker 1: of my wife's friends who's single, had eyes for Brian Finley.
Speaker 1: About that, Brian eyes for you. So this is kind
Speaker 1: of like a love triangle. Wow, well he was on
Speaker 1: your lap and I walked in. I mean, that's not true.
Speaker 1: That's a lie. Brian was very nice and they're very
Speaker 1: polite and all that stuff. So now the question is
Speaker 1: guests gone. Like, my wife has brought this up to
Speaker 1: me several times. You know, it's just she's kind of
Speaker 1: into that. You know, she's asking a question. Is about
Speaker 1: that that guy? You know you were hanging out with Brian?
Speaker 1: So do I then be the matchmaker? But what if
Speaker 1: it goes bad? Then does Brian no longer worship me?
Speaker 1: Because Brian's a big fan. So I'm gonna risk that
Speaker 1: friendship in case, you know, they don't hit at all,
Speaker 1: or maybe they hit it off for a while and
Speaker 1: the sparks don't last and all that. Well, let me
Speaker 1: let me ask you this before I jump into this.
Speaker 1: This answer. What nationality is your wife's friend? I don't
Speaker 1: I don't know why I get I don't know, Mexican, white,
Speaker 1: something like that. I'm asking if she has a little
Speaker 1: spice to her, a little little kick, because Brian, I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't know her that well, I don't,
Speaker 1: I guess, sir, why not I was just saying, because
Speaker 1: Brian is a super super nice Like, Brian's the type
Speaker 1: of guy you would never want to argue with or
Speaker 1: pick a fight with, because he's super nice. Yeah, Brian's
Speaker 1: the kind of guy that I would argue. Uh. And
Speaker 1: not that I'm comparing myself to Brian, but this is
Speaker 1: a problem guys have. He's so nice, women walk all
Speaker 1: over him. I'm imagining, right, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Maybe you know, but at least that's how he comes
Speaker 1: across at work. Yeah, he's he's a gentleman, but he's
Speaker 1: super He's so nice that you think he's being fake.
Speaker 1: It's true. Yeah, yeah, you know he's he's very polite,
Speaker 1: he's got great manners and all that. And uh yeah,
Speaker 1: don't don't women. I don't wanna speak for the ladies,
Speaker 1: but I've always heard they like the bad boy, right,
Speaker 1: They like the guy that doesn't give them attention. They
Speaker 1: like the guy that doesn't you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: like that whole rap about you know what. They want
Speaker 1: the guy that they can't get. Well, I don't know,
Speaker 1: ask her why if she picked you. You're not a
Speaker 1: bad guy. We all make mistakes, you know, we all Anyway,
Speaker 1: all right, so the Mallard Man March guests, we had
Speaker 1: to get back to this. Okay, more, what's it's the
Speaker 1: fifth Hour with Ben Mallard. Are looking at the logo?
Speaker 1: Are we gonna change that here? In Well, I mean
Speaker 1: fifth hour with Ben Maller, And I mean we could do.
Speaker 1: You know, who's gonna who's gonna replace you? That's why
Speaker 1: I I whoever's name we and put that in the title.
Speaker 1: I wish we take out applications right now and just
Speaker 1: have something online. Who wants to work for free for
Speaker 1: Ben mally listened to him for four hours just talk
Speaker 1: and then another hour. Wow, I mean really the job
Speaker 1: requirement Ryan Ye. Be sure to catch live editions of
Speaker 1: The Ben Maller Show week days at two am Eastern
Speaker 1: eleven pm Pacific. Well, I mean you can go make
Speaker 1: juicy Lucy's if you want and do that. You know,
Speaker 1: stuff the cheese in the middle of the ground beef
Speaker 1: if you think that's more enjoyable. I'm sure it'll be
Speaker 1: very delicious and all that. But you know it's not
Speaker 1: so day three of your five day trip. This is
Speaker 1: day two, which is only an hour into the podcast.
Speaker 1: We know, um, we'll squeeze out a three hour podcast
Speaker 1: in the fifth hour. No, So the So the Mallard
Speaker 1: Man March So So Saturday Night was a tremendous success.
Speaker 1: There was no misconduct. Nobody got arrested. There were you know,
Speaker 1: a few people had a good time and all that.
Speaker 1: It was no, not some kind of breach of the
Speaker 1: code of conduct or anything like that. It was. It
Speaker 1: was very cool. So So went back to the hotel.
Speaker 1: I took a an uber back to the hotel on
Speaker 1: Saturday night and then Sunday spent the early part of
Speaker 1: that I would watched the NFL on my laptop. Thank
Speaker 1: god for the Internet. Um never wager on Weeks seventeen.
Speaker 1: Didn't do Beny versus the Penny. Don't mind it at all.
Speaker 1: It's like the preseason. Can't figure it out Week seventeen.
Speaker 1: Uh it is uh fu gazy is what it is.
Speaker 1: And some teams rest players, other teams check out early.
Speaker 1: You don't know who's motivated to play. The hardest thing
Speaker 1: about gambling is to find out who's motivated who's not motivated.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it's it's I feel like it's more in the
Speaker 1: middle part, early to the middle part of the year.
Speaker 1: It's pretty good. After that, all hell breaks loose the
Speaker 1: last couple of weeks. But then I went to lunch
Speaker 1: with Jay, Scoop and and Megan. Uh a good time.
Speaker 1: We went out, had a meal and then we walked
Speaker 1: down to the meeting place in the Mallard Man March
Speaker 1: and they were standing by was Lee, Brianna Ed from Spokane, Christina,
Speaker 1: David was there, Dandy and his lady friend Jess there.
Speaker 1: A comic book guy showed up. How about this the
Speaker 1: comic book guys, a comic book artist and he's a listener.
Speaker 1: And he showed up and it was hanging out. It
Speaker 1: was very nice. Took a photo with him and they
Speaker 1: passed out signs that Ed and Christina made, and and
Speaker 1: then Jay, scoop and and Megan they pulled out a
Speaker 1: huge surprise here Gascon. They and I didn't know they
Speaker 1: had this at lunch. They didn't mention anything. So I
Speaker 1: was like, wow, And they had some fat heads made
Speaker 1: of myself, Eddie, Coop and Roberto so we added that,
Speaker 1: which is funny because I didn't think they were really
Speaker 1: fat heads. I thought they were actually like legit heads,
Speaker 1: like they were like life size heads of you guys.
Speaker 1: I know you're jealous there was no gascon head. You're
Speaker 1: probably You're probably lucky there wasn't a gas on head
Speaker 1: because it would have been like a pinata and people
Speaker 1: would have been swinging and throwing things that your face
Speaker 1: there stick all over the cheeks, probably the net. That's
Speaker 1: a lie. That is a lie. They did a good
Speaker 1: job with the fat heads though. Now were they because
Speaker 1: I saw a couple of people holding them up, But
Speaker 1: were they on sticks or was there like stick them
Speaker 1: on on a board? Uh No, they were like there
Speaker 1: were sticks connected to them. Um, but they were awesome.
Speaker 1: I mean I was like blown away by that. I was.
Speaker 1: I was very uncomfortable to see my face on a
Speaker 1: fat head because the thing wasn't It wasn't like the
Speaker 1: pictures were or graphic. They were They looked like legit
Speaker 1: uh photos. So the way that they were cut was
Speaker 1: was real legit stuff. It wasn't like and it was
Speaker 1: like computer, you know, modulator and anthem at that. So
Speaker 1: it was like the work was fantastic. Yeah, they do
Speaker 1: a good job. And those things are not They're not
Speaker 1: that cheap, I don't think, man. I don't know how
Speaker 1: much they cost or whatever. But they were they were
Speaker 1: pretty cool. And then Jay Scoop, you talking about this
Speaker 1: guy just rolling out the red carpet. This is the
Speaker 1: chamber of commerce. This guy jays you. You gotta do.
Speaker 1: You have no one in your fan base guest guy
Speaker 1: like this, Jay Scoop guy. This guy's amazing, alright, this
Speaker 1: guy is a god among men. Ben what a dick. Alright.
Speaker 1: So so he not only had the fat heads made,
Speaker 1: he then had he passed out. He had a limited
Speaker 1: number of Mallard Man March twenty nineteen branded hats. This
Speaker 1: is a very rare collectible for the show. This is
Speaker 1: right up there with when we had the Mad Clown
Speaker 1: made some T shirts years ago. I had some T
Speaker 1: shirts that were made. A very few items related to
Speaker 1: the show were ever made. And because no one buys him,
Speaker 1: but but he, he made them and we we numbers
Speaker 1: put them on and we headed down from downtown Seattle
Speaker 1: and we marched with Ed chanting on his bullhorn. Listen
Speaker 1: the Ben Millers Show on kJ R and Fox Sports
Speaker 1: Radio and I Heart Media and all that stuff, and
Speaker 1: it was so funny. We marched by City Hall in Seattle,
Speaker 1: so of course we had to stop and take a
Speaker 1: photo in front of City Hall. I mean, why not. Uh.
Speaker 1: We walked all the way through the bars and the
Speaker 1: restaurants around Pioneer Square and we walked to the doorstep
Speaker 1: of Century Link Field and there was a mass of
Speaker 1: humanity there, people just milling around. They had the drum
Speaker 1: line for this. There was out in front banging on
Speaker 1: the drums and and all that. And we settled in
Speaker 1: and they started. Everyone was chanting, and uh, it was.
Speaker 1: It was wild man. They at one point they overtook
Speaker 1: the Jesus Guide announcing that everyone was gonna go to
Speaker 1: Hell and all that, you know, holding up the sign
Speaker 1: that that that they do and and that was pretty funny.
Speaker 1: That was pretty cool. Uh. The craziest thing gas Gar
Speaker 1: is this act he worked. There were a number of
Speaker 1: people that were not part of our party that walked
Speaker 1: over to me and said, Hey, I just want to
Speaker 1: tell you. I've listened to you for years on KJR
Speaker 1: at night and I'm a fan, and you know, I
Speaker 1: didn't know you were gonna be here or whatever. I didn't.
Speaker 1: I didn't realize you're gonna be here. I didn't, you know, whatever,
Speaker 1: give me a whole rap. And it was cool. I
Speaker 1: had a bunch of people. They were just at the game,
Speaker 1: like waiting to go into the stadium to watch the
Speaker 1: Seahawks forty Niners game. It actually worked, I mean edding, edding,
Speaker 1: Christina and J Scoop and always this guerilla marketing campaign.
Speaker 1: Actually we met fans of the show. Was a truck
Speaker 1: driver from from western Washington that that it was very excited.
Speaker 1: He said this, I'm the second person he's met. He
Speaker 1: met Mike Florio, he said years ago. He said, I'm
Speaker 1: right there with Florio. Um, but that was that was cool.
Speaker 1: So nice people. And I know Guesstcan hates the Mallar militia,
Speaker 1: but these are salt of the earth people. Guest guns
Speaker 1: is nauseating. Radio. No, it's it's one. It's not radio.
Speaker 1: It's the podcast stupid, that's not radio. What's the digital
Speaker 1: enhancement of Ben Maller. So you know what I love
Speaker 1: about the show. Let me tell you what I love
Speaker 1: about the show. But you know who just watched in
Speaker 1: the studios. That is my best friend now here at
Speaker 1: Fox Sports Radio's lead to Lap, the gate keeper. He
Speaker 1: was the one at Stemy great all expenses paid trip,
Speaker 1: God bless lead to Lap. You can find him online
Speaker 1: somewhere too. Yeah. Well, Lee was the middleman who had
Speaker 1: to clear everything with the Seattle Seahawks to get me in.
Speaker 1: In the schmucks in the PR department for the Seahawks,
Speaker 1: Uh may they all lose their jobs, every one of
Speaker 1: them who was responsible for me not getting access to
Speaker 1: the stadium. Uh may they all have to go on
Speaker 1: LinkedIn and update the resumes did not allow me in.
Speaker 1: A clearer incompetence by the Seattle Seahawks PR Department made
Speaker 1: nothing but bad things happen to the people involved in that.
Speaker 1: You have one job to accommodate the media. We're on
Speaker 1: three D and fifty radio stations. I heart media, American
Speaker 1: Forces Radio and all this crap. And these theos don't
Speaker 1: allow us into the stadium. Fuck them, is what I
Speaker 1: have to say. Why, Because when the PR department reached
Speaker 1: out to Lee, they actually asked him point blank, who
Speaker 1: was Ben mallor there you go? Here you go, Well, FM,
Speaker 1: I know who they are, and I'm cursing all of them,
Speaker 1: every one of those people who is responsible, and I
Speaker 1: have names. They're all getting a jinx, every one of them.
Speaker 1: I hope they enjoy that. This is just amazing for
Speaker 1: a guy that has stacks and stacks of paper to
Speaker 1: quote unquote prep for his show. You didn't do any
Speaker 1: prep for this trip. You didn't prep how to take
Speaker 1: a train to the hotel. You didn't prep to make
Speaker 1: sure you have tickets and credentials for the game itself.
Speaker 1: This is embarrassing. Now I know why. Now. I I
Speaker 1: talked to Lee and he made it seem like this
Speaker 1: is a fatal complaint. There's nothing to worry about here
Speaker 1: because I've done these things in other cities. And guess what,
Speaker 1: Seattle Seahawks, everyone else is accommodating every other goddamn team
Speaker 1: I have tried to do this with have let me
Speaker 1: in and rolled out the red carpet. Not the Seattle
Speaker 1: fucking Seahawks PR Department. They don't allow me in. I'm
Speaker 1: happy they didn't. Yeah, I'm sure you are. I thought
Speaker 1: it was. I thought it made it for a great
Speaker 1: I thought it. You know, the better story bed is
Speaker 1: always in the fucking losing locker room. Alright, Well, as
Speaker 1: it turned out though in retrospect, I am please. I
Speaker 1: got to hang out more with the militia, you know it,
Speaker 1: which was which was nice. More on that in a minute.
Speaker 1: But I want to get back to the mallon mush
Speaker 1: what you hate, guest, let me ask you a question
Speaker 1: real quick, because like Toronto during the NBA postseason, they
Speaker 1: have that that big patio out in front so you
Speaker 1: can watch like it wasn't Air Canada Center whatever, to
Speaker 1: watch the games. Does does Seattle have anything like that
Speaker 1: so you can watch like pregame, post game, and even
Speaker 1: the game for the Seahawks. No, there were a bunch
Speaker 1: of bars. I mean, we the stadiums kind of open
Speaker 1: in Century Link Fields, so you can see in a
Speaker 1: little bit. You can't really see the field obviously, but
Speaker 1: you know, it's a cool setup and I like how
Speaker 1: they have the roofs so the noise bounces off that's
Speaker 1: why it's so loud there. The way they set up
Speaker 1: the acoustics and all that, so it's pretty cool. But
Speaker 1: there's no there's a bunch of bars around there, so
Speaker 1: there's really no reason to stand there and watch the
Speaker 1: game when you can just go to a million bars
Speaker 1: around the stadium and watch watch the game. But the
Speaker 1: Mallard militia, all right, Uh, The thing I love most
Speaker 1: about the show, guests, guy, the people that listen to
Speaker 1: the show is that we bring all types of people
Speaker 1: together the tabernacle of the Mallard Militia. I we got
Speaker 1: homeless people, are struggling college students, young people just starting
Speaker 1: out in the working force, people that work in factories, doctors, lawyers,
Speaker 1: police officers, criminals, truck drivers, factory workers, you name it.
Speaker 1: People cooking up food and kitchens all over the all
Speaker 1: these people, and and they're all united by insomnia and
Speaker 1: the enjoyment of original, sarcastic overnight sports radio. It's the
Speaker 1: one thing that brings everyone together. I think. Yeah, you had,
Speaker 1: I think this year, at least in twenty nineteen you
Speaker 1: had at that event. You probably had the second biggest
Speaker 1: following you've had this year, because we've had because we
Speaker 1: had people all across the world that chimed in for
Speaker 1: our television broadcast. That's right, that's right that I believe
Speaker 1: you scored another touchdown. It's now eight hundred and fifty
Speaker 1: to nothing. Guess on in that game, by the way,
Speaker 1: Sentenial and uh Jay Sarah, Yes, Centennial just scored again
Speaker 1: again again again. Oh wait, there's another boo boo, there's
Speaker 1: another blooper, there's another blunder. Yeah, well, so we're talking
Speaker 1: about your weekend. That's right, It's all about me, which
Speaker 1: must annoy the hell out of you guests. Well, I
Speaker 1: worked all weekend, so I know a lot of your
Speaker 1: your followers and boys and lovers. They actually listened to me,
Speaker 1: and they actually broadcasted what I was saying on the air,
Speaker 1: so that was very flattering. I I well, I felt
Speaker 1: that since you were unwilling to make the trip and
Speaker 1: want to go to Seattle, I didn't have a chartered
Speaker 1: flight for me, just going by myself. Fine, donning caviar
Speaker 1: and some champagne, curtsy and Jay Scoop must be nice. Well,
Speaker 1: Jay Scoop would have flown you in, I'm sure, but
Speaker 1: he knows you know you you hate the militia, right,
Speaker 1: and you would have been lightheaded, You would have been deranged,
Speaker 1: you would have been I love all your female listeners,
Speaker 1: Well there you go, everyone of them. Yeah, every single one.
Speaker 1: Not the dead one. Wow, all right, she could still
Speaker 1: be listening on the other side. You never know the problem.
Speaker 1: It's possible and it's unlikely, but you never I mean,
Speaker 1: you can't completely rule that out. We've got better things
Speaker 1: to do. I don't know, maybe not listen if I
Speaker 1: if I threw you into the er room for your
Speaker 1: all bladder, she probably was thrown into the kapin because
Speaker 1: of you. I like, I like, he like, uh you
Speaker 1: you flick your your lips there at the end, and
Speaker 1: you're so proud of yourself what I can Anyways, al right,
Speaker 1: moving on, so look like you belong. This is one
Speaker 1: of the great life lessons I need to pass on
Speaker 1: here Gascon. So, so after we got done with the rally,
Speaker 1: and we had a wonderful time chanting your name, and
Speaker 1: Ed was chanting anti Gascon things, which I think was
Speaker 1: just marvelous. One of the great things that edin' Spokane
Speaker 1: and Christina have done. Everyone behind booing Gascon there. And
Speaker 1: I want you to know this didn't show up on
Speaker 1: the video that I tweeted out Gascon. They were hand
Speaker 1: to god, thousands of people that heard that chant that
Speaker 1: were a captive audience as they were waiting to go
Speaker 1: into the stadium. Okay, and so uh Ed decided to
Speaker 1: improvise there and did a little impromptu Gascon chance it
Speaker 1: and uh and I had to record it of course
Speaker 1: for posterity, say, because the the average age or at
Speaker 1: least maturity level of you people is about fifteen, So
Speaker 1: congratulations on that. Well, it's about the same number of
Speaker 1: people who know who you are guests on fifteen. So
Speaker 1: it's kind of how that works. Uh, to take the
Speaker 1: under on that, take the under on that. But to
Speaker 1: each their own. And I followed John Wooden's pyramid of
Speaker 1: success is what I I. That's how I followed, Uh,
Speaker 1: the seven point creed of John Wooden. Might every make
Speaker 1: every day your masterpiece? You don't make every day your masterpiece.
Speaker 1: You do not. It's a bad job by you. That's
Speaker 1: coming from a guy that couldn't get into a Seahawks
Speaker 1: scam under. That's Truely, I haven't been in radio long
Speaker 1: enough and haven't been on enough affiliates and eating the market.
Speaker 1: By the way in Seattle, you're gonna talk about completely.
Speaker 1: If I owned the don't have an owner. Their owner died,
Speaker 1: but if if you had, if you own the I
Speaker 1: would fire the PR person. If I owned the team
Speaker 1: and I found out the somebody was coming coming to
Speaker 1: see I'll cover the game, that would have given you promotion.
Speaker 1: I would have gotten an interview after the game. I
Speaker 1: would have for Fox Sports rad I would have gone
Speaker 1: down on the field and got one of the players
Speaker 1: to call in or whatever as a guest on national radio.
Speaker 1: And these morons screwed that up. So you know they
Speaker 1: get but they're gonna get burn in hell. That's what
Speaker 1: I gotta establish yourself. How about this, I'll make a
Speaker 1: bet with you next season, I'll try to go to
Speaker 1: a primetime game in Seattle and I'll bet you'll get in.
Speaker 1: You will not get it, I bet you I will
Speaker 1: unless they fire the PR person. Maybe they'll let you
Speaker 1: in at that point. This is your fault for not
Speaker 1: reaching out to your friends. That was it, kJ R? Yes,
Speaker 1: why didn't you reach out to them first before you
Speaker 1: did anything else? Well, I assumed there would be no
Speaker 1: problem because again, I've been doing this for twenty years
Speaker 1: or whatever, and I've never had this issue before. People
Speaker 1: are even when I didn't deserve to go to places,
Speaker 1: people let me into these stupid things. And uh, you
Speaker 1: know this is why when I I hate to toot
Speaker 1: my own horn, I feel like I belonged there and
Speaker 1: I wasn't allowed in. I was like, Wow, I mean,
Speaker 1: what an asshole this? This is a woman that works
Speaker 1: with the Seahawks. Is I mean we're really I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't know how else I can lay it out
Speaker 1: for you. You You get everything for free, and all of
Speaker 1: a sudden you gotta pun up a little. I'm a
Speaker 1: working member of the media. Guest, you should try working.
Speaker 1: You're in the media, but you don't work. You went
Speaker 1: up there on vacation. I didn't go on vacation at all.
Speaker 1: I was a working assignment. I was there representing the
Speaker 1: Malla Militia, the people assault of the Earth. As I said,
Speaker 1: your wife came out, men, women and children. Your wife
Speaker 1: is on a staycation. You're just gallivanting around the Emerald
Speaker 1: city of Seattle for five days on a on a
Speaker 1: price charted flight less than forty eight hours. Dumb, dumb,
Speaker 1: less than forty eight hours. I pack a lot into
Speaker 1: my days, all right, Moving on, So, look like you
Speaker 1: belong ginn be a three hour podcast. I'm telling you
Speaker 1: where you're going be a three hour podcast. Look like
Speaker 1: you belong. So so David the er aeronautics guy or something.
Speaker 1: I'm probably butchering exactly what he did, but he uh,
Speaker 1: he was with us the entire weekend and after the event,
Speaker 1: the Mallard Man March, he suggested, Hey, I got a place.
Speaker 1: He said this, this thirteen Coins restaurant says back in
Speaker 1: the day when Larry King was a big media guy,
Speaker 1: you know radio, it did the Overnight Show and CNN
Speaker 1: and all that. Larry did his show from this restaurant
Speaker 1: and said, according to my man David, the greatest restaurant
Speaker 1: in America. And so that got my interest. I said, Okay,
Speaker 1: where is it at. It was right next literally across
Speaker 1: from the parking lot of a Century Link field. It
Speaker 1: was like right there, and it was packed. It was
Speaker 1: game day. There was a waiting list of people to
Speaker 1: get a table to watch the game. So David, again
Speaker 1: I told you, he was just pretty well. He marched
Speaker 1: in with a very small platoon of the Mallard Militia
Speaker 1: men and women. There were just a few of us
Speaker 1: left and we we marched into the basement bar at
Speaker 1: thirteen Coins. A very nice restaurant. Mind, it's open twenty
Speaker 1: four hours a day, but it's uh of a high
Speaker 1: end type deal for for my taste. Uh wait, so
Speaker 1: you only had a few people, would you do price
Speaker 1: out your own militia? No, they actually had tickets to
Speaker 1: the game, a lot of them. When that takes the game.
Speaker 1: But anyway, so so David walks in. He's leading us
Speaker 1: with these the small platoon of the Mallem militia. He
Speaker 1: then sees an open table, proceeds to sit down, and
Speaker 1: all the other foot soldiers settle into the booth. Now,
Speaker 1: mind you, Gascan. We did not have a reservation, our
Speaker 1: name was not on a waiting list, but they did
Speaker 1: not kick us out. We successfully, led by David, hijacked
Speaker 1: a table on a Seahawk game day with a long
Speaker 1: waiting list. Because of the age old rule of life,
Speaker 1: if you look and act like you belong somewhere, people
Speaker 1: will assume you belong there and leave you alone. It's
Speaker 1: pretty good. Pretty good menu too. Oh yeah, they have
Speaker 1: a nice I did the Philly Cheese Day, but they
Speaker 1: have a very nice menu. You went to a high
Speaker 1: you went to a five star restaurant, and you had
Speaker 1: a fucking cheese day. I had a fucking great cheese
Speaker 1: steak is what I had, with the French fries that
Speaker 1: were wonderful, and it was marvelous. It was mostly Sea fans.
Speaker 1: That were a few forty Niner fans in there, and
Speaker 1: they were cheering the whole thing. It was like being
Speaker 1: at the stadium, except you had the TVs going and
Speaker 1: all that, and uh it was it was really really
Speaker 1: cool and uh we we had people stroll past, you know,
Speaker 1: Super Bowl. There was a producer of Fox Sports Radio
Speaker 1: who was no longer at Fox Sports Radio. He works
Speaker 1: at ESPN now, but he years ago at the Super
Speaker 1: Bowl did not have a field pass, do you know
Speaker 1: the story, And so he had a pass to go
Speaker 1: to the Super Bowl, but he was not allowed. Each
Speaker 1: pass is restricted where you can go, so he was
Speaker 1: not allowed on the field. But he put on a
Speaker 1: nice outfit and calmly strolled out on the field and
Speaker 1: stood and watched the game on a Super Bowl right,
Speaker 1: And this was in the last like, you know, fifteen
Speaker 1: years or maybe maybe ten years, last ten years, I
Speaker 1: lose track of time, but it's since nine eleven when
Speaker 1: they increase security everywhere, and the Super Bowl has always
Speaker 1: had a lot of security. Anyway, he just looked like
Speaker 1: he belonged. He strolled past security, stood on the sidelines,
Speaker 1: watched the entire Super Bowl because he looked like he
Speaker 1: belonged there. About that, that's pretty good. Who is it?
Speaker 1: Um Raj? You know rab? Yeah, Well I don't know him,
Speaker 1: know him, but I know who he is. Yeah, Yeah,
Speaker 1: he did it. You asked him about it sometime. It's
Speaker 1: true story. Yeah, all right, but I had a wonderful chief.
Speaker 1: It's a Seattle cheese steak, not a Philly chef stead
Speaker 1: because I was in Seattle, and uh, I want to
Speaker 1: thank Brianna. She spoiled me. She paid the tab. I
Speaker 1: was gonna pay the tab. She paid the table. Very
Speaker 1: nice woman. Hey, it's twenty nineteen, almost twenty dumb. Dumb
Speaker 1: women are equal, alright, they are equal. But that's right.
Speaker 1: Chivalry is not dead. Ben Mallory, we went on a day.
Speaker 1: We were just hanging out, and she offered and she said, listen,
Speaker 1: you're in Seattle, you're She's very polite and she I
Speaker 1: want to welcome you to the s Pacific Northwest and
Speaker 1: all that, and she did so. And it was also cool.
Speaker 1: During the game. You want dedication from the Mallem Militia.
Speaker 1: All right, let me tell you this guy Walker. You
Speaker 1: don't know who Walker is. No. Walker is a freshman
Speaker 1: at Wazoo at Washington State, future radio stars. Probably gonna
Speaker 1: take my job in radio some day, Sugar. He has
Speaker 1: been listening to our show since he was in seventh
Speaker 1: grade and junior high school boy, and he works at
Speaker 1: the college radio station at Wazoo. He flew into Seattle
Speaker 1: during the game, alright, if flight landed during the game.
Speaker 1: He then makes a bee line to the restaurant we
Speaker 1: were at because he wanted to hang out and meet
Speaker 1: me and and meet you know, meet us and be
Speaker 1: part of the gang and all that. Did you buy
Speaker 1: him a drink at least? No, he wasn't even old
Speaker 1: enough to drink. He's like, you know, eighteen or whatever.
Speaker 1: He's a kid. You just went on a ramp fucking
Speaker 1: thirty minutes ago about making memories. Yes, you could have
Speaker 1: made this kid of memory, but he's not old enough
Speaker 1: to drin. That would have arrested, asshole. You wouldn't have
Speaker 1: been arrested at Yes, I would have been arrested at
Speaker 1: the part Ben Mall. You just said that two minutes ago,
Speaker 1: act the part I love Walker. But he looked like
Speaker 1: he was eighteen and nineteen. He looked like a young
Speaker 1: guy that could get past that. If you looked a
Speaker 1: little older, I could have pulled it off. The first
Speaker 1: time I ever drank alcohol was actually at Washington State.
Speaker 1: I went up there at seventeen years of age. I
Speaker 1: got invited up there to a camp, a football camp
Speaker 1: by Washington State. I stayed on camp. It was it
Speaker 1: was taken around by a junior. Got arrest her. So
Speaker 1: I don't know how she is now, but she was.
Speaker 1: She brought me a seventy seven years old now. She
Speaker 1: brought me around campus and took me to a handful
Speaker 1: of bars. And let me tell you that was a
Speaker 1: memory at seventeen years of age. That was a cougar
Speaker 1: and with a cougar. Ben, you should have done this
Speaker 1: guy right. What I get him a stripper? What do
Speaker 1: you want me to do? I get him a prostitute.
Speaker 1: What were you looking for? The kid flew down from Pullman, Washington.
Speaker 1: Probably a prop plane got in there. He U was
Speaker 1: to a five star restaurant. You get my glass of water?
Speaker 1: Thanks for it was it was ice water. It wasn't
Speaker 1: just water. There was ice in there, man, all right,
Speaker 1: it was st This guy's a fan. We I hung out.
Speaker 1: When we went outside, we talked. I'm gonna give him
Speaker 1: some advice on radio. I'm gonna help this guy out.
Speaker 1: I love young guys that want to be in radio.
Speaker 1: I we need the next generation who aren't assholes like
Speaker 1: you to be in radio. That's what we need, and
Speaker 1: this guy's gonna do it. This guy's gonna do it right,
Speaker 1: all right, because he's a fan of the show, so
Speaker 1: he understands how we do the show. He's gonna do
Speaker 1: his own thing, but he's gonna take some of the
Speaker 1: things that we do and make it his own thing.
Speaker 1: I'm all for it, alright. Best piece of advice you
Speaker 1: probably did not give him, Walker, I'll give it to you.
Speaker 1: We don't do anything else outside of being on air.
Speaker 1: Don't be a producer an editor, your crap. No, I
Speaker 1: told him the opposite, I said, listen. I started as
Speaker 1: a board op at the mighty six ninety and Cogo
Speaker 1: in San Diego, and that was my I worked as
Speaker 1: I pulled cards, I pulled commercials for Lee Hack saw Hamilton's.
Speaker 1: As an intern, I started as a radio stringer, a
Speaker 1: reporter and radio. I worked as a producer and radio.
Speaker 1: I did every job except sales. I tried that. I
Speaker 1: was terrible at it, and then eventually I was able
Speaker 1: to work my way into an on air position as
Speaker 1: a talk show. The on air positions now are in
Speaker 1: a different climate, so you know this damn well. As
Speaker 1: good as anybody else does that half the people that
Speaker 1: are on the air are jocks. Well that, I mean
Speaker 1: that is a problem with sports radio program right. Thors
Speaker 1: love athletes, and it's everywhere I've worked it's been that way.
Speaker 1: They love the ex jos even if they can't talk,
Speaker 1: they put them on a long walker. If your profession
Speaker 1: and dream is to be on air, your job is
Speaker 1: to practice being on air, or to practice being a
Speaker 1: quarterback at Washington State and then eventually but but no,
Speaker 1: I mean there's other ways that And I told him
Speaker 1: and I told Walker this, and I'll tell you listening
Speaker 1: this that it's a lot. I feel like it's harder
Speaker 1: and yet easier at the same time. Today it's harder
Speaker 1: because there's more competition for these jobs. There's I feel
Speaker 1: like there's fewer jobs and talk, you know, sports radio.
Speaker 1: But you can create your own animal with podcasting. Now
Speaker 1: I doesn't mean people are gonna be listening, but you
Speaker 1: can create your own niche. And it's all about getting reps.
Speaker 1: And I'm a big believer in that ten thousand hours thing,
Speaker 1: and you know, being behind the microphone, getting comfortable and
Speaker 1: the ten thousand hour rule, and you know, it's actually
Speaker 1: more than ten thousand hours, but you can do a
Speaker 1: lot of that podcast. Yeah, you should have told them
Speaker 1: two other things. Make sure wisdom from gascon, make sure
Speaker 1: you're willing to move, and don't get into a relationship.
Speaker 1: Well he'll figure that out, probably the relationship thing. But
Speaker 1: generally speaking, Uh, I don wanna speak for all women,
Speaker 1: but in most cases women are repulsed by the radio profession. Um,
Speaker 1: you know not because if you've met your wife and
Speaker 1: or twenties, do you think you would have a either
Speaker 1: her or be your your career right now? Well, remember
Speaker 1: Guestco When I was dating. Uh, First of all, women
Speaker 1: wouldn't usually give me the time of the day, but
Speaker 1: when I would go on dates with him, I didn't
Speaker 1: tell him I worked in radio, I know, But you
Speaker 1: were working. You were a bigger workaholic then than you
Speaker 1: are now. Oh I was. I had applied a website,
Speaker 1: I had the radio show on the weekends, I was doing,
Speaker 1: I filled in during the week I was going NonStop.
Speaker 1: But it did work out, I mean kind of, not
Speaker 1: for the Seahawks PR department, but for other people worked out.
Speaker 1: Your wife settled, It's fine. Wow, how come no one
Speaker 1: settled for you? Guestco what's up? Boom boom boom, boom
Speaker 1: boom boom. All right, so I just put the book
Speaker 1: in on this What a magical year as we closed down,
Speaker 1: head into and we'll be back on the radio in
Speaker 1: you know, next week. But what a magic year. These
Speaker 1: meeting Greeks. Now, this is the first time we've done
Speaker 1: two of them in one year. As I recall over
Speaker 1: the years, I'm trying to think of all the places
Speaker 1: we've met fans of the show and Mallard Militia pe ones. Uh.
Speaker 1: The first one we ever did was in Pittsburgh, of
Speaker 1: all places, and that was back in the Pete in
Speaker 1: Pittsburgh and the bread Man days when they were the
Speaker 1: big callers. And I was just on vacation. I was
Speaker 1: driving through Pittsburgh and I was able to hook up
Speaker 1: with these guys on social media. I said, Hey, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be in town. It was like one in the morning,
Speaker 1: and we met at Primani Brothers in the Steel District. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's and I I saw and it was so funny.
Speaker 1: I took I think it was Pete in Pittsburgh, dull Boy,
Speaker 1: bread Man, everyone's got a good nickname. And there was
Speaker 1: one of their their girlfriends was there and that was it.
Speaker 1: It was It was just three listeners and me and
Speaker 1: my brother Mike, who was with us, and we hung
Speaker 1: out there and told stories. And then Pete, who had
Speaker 1: was a caller to Howard Stern show still is. Pete
Speaker 1: did not want his photo on the internet, so he
Speaker 1: he hand to God here Gascon. He took a paper
Speaker 1: bag and put it over his head and there's a photo.
Speaker 1: It's probably still on Facebook or no, no, it's I
Speaker 1: Bess on Instagram and on Instagram. What's my space? The
Speaker 1: old mice space, but that was how long ago it
Speaker 1: was my space when that was big and uh yeah,
Speaker 1: he the photo of him wearing a paper bag on
Speaker 1: his head because he did not want his identity out.
Speaker 1: But we we did want in Syracuse, which was kind
Speaker 1: of cool. I had a Mallard food dish named after
Speaker 1: me in Syracuse. We've done a couple in Boston, uh
Speaker 1: and Kansas City, couple in l A, San Bernio. We
Speaker 1: don't want in Baker's Field, which was the worst one
Speaker 1: by far we've ever done. Uh yeah, you were part
Speaker 1: of that. Uh And and so now we've done Seattle,
Speaker 1: but this is the first time we've done too, And
Speaker 1: there were two thousand, nine ninety seven miles apart. Back
Speaker 1: in April, the Casking flagging across from Finnway Park, home
Speaker 1: of the Red Sox. That was in early April. It
Speaker 1: was some stuff for w E I and was back
Speaker 1: in Boston and we got together and then at McCoy's
Speaker 1: Firehouse bar here in Seattle at century Link Field, the home.
Speaker 1: This is just you know, little ways away from century
Speaker 1: Link Field, but close enough. And so who's next? Ties
Speaker 1: ahead of us? Where are we going in? Yes, I
Speaker 1: hate to say this, but I'm gonna ask you if
Speaker 1: we can up Pianni a little bit. I think in
Speaker 1: I think I think you should hit up a race track.
Speaker 1: I think like del Mar, Santa Anita. I would love that,
Speaker 1: or maybe like even Churchill Downs. I think that would
Speaker 1: be awesome. That would be great. I love going to
Speaker 1: the track. I'm all about I would love Santa Anita.
Speaker 1: They need some good publicity right all the horse keep
Speaker 1: dying this year. I think it was over thirty, wasn't
Speaker 1: if I think it was seven, I think it was
Speaker 1: del Mar. For anyone that is single that listens where
Speaker 1: the surf meets the turf, Yes, Oh, yes, it is
Speaker 1: like fishing with dynamite. And there's a lot of beautiful
Speaker 1: people that live in that area. But even I mean,
Speaker 1: have you been at Churchill Downs. I've never been to
Speaker 1: church Now I would like to go. You know a
Speaker 1: guy I worked with in college radio, he became like
Speaker 1: the PR director for Churchill Downs. He got into horse racing,
Speaker 1: and uh, I don't know if he still is. I
Speaker 1: I don't think he's there anymore, but he was the
Speaker 1: He ran Churchill Downs for years and we were we
Speaker 1: were on the same college radio station at Saddleback when
Speaker 1: I was there back in the day. But I'm thinking, like,
Speaker 1: you know, the racetrack would be cool. People but saying
Speaker 1: we gotta go to Minnesota. We do very well on
Speaker 1: k Fan. I think that would be a lot of
Speaker 1: fun to go to, like a Twins game or something
Speaker 1: during the summer. I know the guys in Cincinnati who
Speaker 1: love you Gascon, we're saying we got to go to
Speaker 1: a Reds game, eat some Skyline Chili there Cincinnati. I'd
Speaker 1: be a fun, fun time. And yeah, I'm oh, but
Speaker 1: I want to go out and I love to do
Speaker 1: these things. And the problem is, obviously the money part
Speaker 1: of it and and whatnot. I can do the show
Speaker 1: from anywhere, so that's not really an issue. But the
Speaker 1: problem is logistically getting all of us. I know, people,
Speaker 1: where's Eddie. I want to see Eddie or I want
Speaker 1: to see Cooper or whatever Roberto on it. You know,
Speaker 1: that's the logistically that's the problem. Now we're not on
Speaker 1: We're not on on a flagship in Chicago, right. No,
Speaker 1: we are on a station in the sticks in the Chicago,
Speaker 1: but we are on satellite radio, which is booming all
Speaker 1: over the greater Chicago Land area. But yeah, Doc Mike
Speaker 1: would complain because he'd have to drive out to the
Speaker 1: suburbs of Chicago to hear the show on the radio.
Speaker 1: And he used to he used to bitch about that.
Speaker 1: Now he's in Ecuador where he can't hear the show
Speaker 1: at all anyway. So all right, so I'll make a
Speaker 1: deal with you for next year, or I will set
Speaker 1: up a a bigger matter militia get together at one
Speaker 1: of these places. Alright. In return, here we go. I
Speaker 1: need you to take me with you to marlins Man's
Speaker 1: New Year's Eve party for the twenty like his Christmas
Speaker 1: party or his New Year's Eve part, well whatever, one's bigger.
Speaker 1: I don't know which one's bigger. I got invited to
Speaker 1: the Christmas party this year. I didn't get invited to
Speaker 1: a New Year's party, so I assume it's the Christmas
Speaker 1: party the one. So yeah, tick for tat. There you go,
Speaker 1: all right, but you then have to I mean, the
Speaker 1: problem it's in Miami. Are you're gonna go to Miami
Speaker 1: for this? All right? Marlin's man is a good he's
Speaker 1: a good dude. But he's like he invited me to
Speaker 1: the Army Navy game. Like I told you, he wants
Speaker 1: me to go to the Army Navy game with him.
Speaker 1: I got to imagine his compound is like equal to
Speaker 1: Monte Carlo, Like you gotta have a net worth of
Speaker 1: over six figures. Just like I told, his name is Lawrence.
Speaker 1: I told Marlin's Man, the super fan. He goes all
Speaker 1: these games. I said, you're living every kid's dream, every team,
Speaker 1: every guy in junior high school, you know, in the
Speaker 1: high school, Like you know what, I want to just
Speaker 1: travel around and go to all the games and sit
Speaker 1: right behind you on the greatest seats and hang out
Speaker 1: with the players, know who are and all that stuff.
Speaker 1: And that's that's his life a lot. You know, he's
Speaker 1: obviously got a job, makes very good money. But uh,
Speaker 1: it's it's pretty cool. Yeah, it's pretty pretty cool. Hustles
Speaker 1: for the work. Yeah, like you said, he's got he's
Speaker 1: actually got a legit job. He's not a trustful baby.
Speaker 1: Fox Sports Radio has the best sports talk lineup in
Speaker 1: the nation. Catch all of our shows at Fox sports
Speaker 1: Radio dot com and within the I Heart Radio app
Speaker 1: search f s R to listen live. All right, so
Speaker 1: we are at a fork in the road here, guest,
Speaker 1: and we can go one of two ways. We can
Speaker 1: put the baby to bed. So that's it. Job well done.
Speaker 1: See it when we get back next week. When I
Speaker 1: get back from my well deserved camp day situation here,
Speaker 1: I'm still burning through companies. Do I get an extra compact?
Speaker 1: Because I'm not supposed to be working today and I
Speaker 1: am working, So conventional wisdom would be that I get
Speaker 1: being the point on the pulse of the people here,
Speaker 1: that I get an extra day. Technically, this is not
Speaker 1: working because it would constitute someone listening to this, and
Speaker 1: they're probably not so once they see your name, the
Speaker 1: dissenting opinions will chime in here, and those I don't mean,
Speaker 1: come on, I'd rather listen to a pink Unicorn than Gascon.
Speaker 1: Everyone's got varying opinions. That's fine. So that's so we
Speaker 1: we can put the baby to bed, or we can.
Speaker 1: I have other things that I would like to talk about.
Speaker 1: I'm into these bizarre studies. I have a few of
Speaker 1: those that I've been reading this week that we can
Speaker 1: get to. I know you love don't stick to sports,
Speaker 1: so we could do that stuff, or we could just
Speaker 1: say that's it. We're good. You know, I got places
Speaker 1: to go. I'm done. Yeah, I see A lot has
Speaker 1: changed since you have left and returned from your vacation,
Speaker 1: but one thing is staying. I'm not back from I'm
Speaker 1: still on vacation. Okay, one thing that's not I'm in
Speaker 1: a life of leisure here. Yeah you can. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: know that from your Ivory tower. But one thing that
Speaker 1: has not changed though since you've been gone is my
Speaker 1: ability to work and work hard, show grit, fortitude, and
Speaker 1: because I think we should set an example for a
Speaker 1: young walker and everybody else, don't quit, don't sell the
Speaker 1: audience short. So you want to extend this edition of
Speaker 1: the Fifth Hour, which I leave Gascon will set a
Speaker 1: download record. We have a wager, which will be a
Speaker 1: taco wager. Our favorite taco shop by the way, invited
Speaker 1: Gascon to a nice lunch. He declined my invitation. He
Speaker 1: declined my invitation, so you would have gotten a free meal.
Speaker 1: You decided not to go. It's a bad job by you.
Speaker 1: I would never pass up. I would never pass up
Speaker 1: a meal with with the Prince of Darkness. So the
Speaker 1: invitation came late and not Jonas, where Damon Jonas is
Speaker 1: the Prince of darkness, the original Prince of Darkness, Satan himself,
Speaker 1: who I used to work with in radio Lee Kline.
Speaker 1: Great daytime conversation with lead, no alcohol involved. I would
Speaker 1: not want to pass it up, but unfortunately I got
Speaker 1: broadcasting duties. Yeah, I'm sure you do. I'm sure there's
Speaker 1: a people dying to hear what you have to say
Speaker 1: about that. But maybe anyways, let's extend this thing, all right,
Speaker 1: we'll we'll do a few I gotta study this, and
Speaker 1: these are actual studies. We determine whether these things are
Speaker 1: something we believe in or they are bullshit. And it's
Speaker 1: a tribute to Penn and Teller's show Bullshit, which I
Speaker 1: used to love watching back in the day on show
Speaker 1: to Big Penn and Teller fan Big Penn and Teller
Speaker 1: Fan from back in the day. So we'll do some
Speaker 1: of these things. The first one. According to a new study,
Speaker 1: about fifty nine percent of New Year's resolutions are health related.
Speaker 1: But of those fifty, how many of them actually how
Speaker 1: many of the people actually achieve their resolutions. I'd say
Speaker 1: about ten, You're pretty close. They say eight percent of
Speaker 1: people actually achieve their fitness related resolutions, So that means
Speaker 1: fifty of people fail. You get nothing. You are a loser.
Speaker 1: I'm in that like I tried for you when I
Speaker 1: was a big, fatass. I tried for years to lose weight.
Speaker 1: I'd make New Year's resolutions. But then at some point
Speaker 1: I said, that's bullshit. You should just make if you
Speaker 1: want to change your life. It doesn't to be on
Speaker 1: a date some you know, made up calendar. Just wake
Speaker 1: up if it's July, say fuck it, I'm gonna lose weight.
Speaker 1: And he was, I'm gonna do it, and that the
Speaker 1: hardest part is to change, uh, your your pattern of life, right,
Speaker 1: your your habits. It's the hardest thing to do. But
Speaker 1: you shouldn't have to wait until you know a certain
Speaker 1: day to do it. I mean, these things become so ingrained,
Speaker 1: it's like automatic. It's like Jamis Winston throwing into triple coverage.
Speaker 1: You know it's automatic that he will. Was that a
Speaker 1: cheap shot? Now he's the thirty for thirty gain in
Speaker 1: the National Football Like, it's all good. Yeah, the first
Speaker 1: thirty for thirty guy, very impressive. It takes about thirty days, right,
Speaker 1: isn't they say thirty days of consistency to change. I'll
Speaker 1: change the habit. But I've heard it takes even longer
Speaker 1: that that's that's actually bullshit. It takes more than thirty days.
Speaker 1: And since we're not doing Benny versus the Penny right
Speaker 1: now because the regular season has ended, um, who, we
Speaker 1: will do it for the playoffs, but no, I will
Speaker 1: have to tweet out the picks because you're very busy guests, guy,
Speaker 1: and you tell me you're not available. Wait, there's like
Speaker 1: four games. Um, I understand that, but we're you know,
Speaker 1: we're not doing it now. It's too early in the week.
Speaker 1: I'm handicapped the games yet. I mean, if you want
Speaker 1: to come back, we can do it later in the week. Yeah,
Speaker 1: of course, But we we we, Well, that would mean
Speaker 1: I have to work another day of my vacation. I
Speaker 1: wasn't I wasn'tna say that. That's a lot of work.
Speaker 1: The work for what I put in for the who
Speaker 1: Am I? Game was important for this weekend anyway. Huh
Speaker 1: when you do your trivia who am I? I? Do that?
Speaker 1: You don't do that? Now you're gonna lie to people. Wow,
Speaker 1: what a schmuck Jesus unbelievable you have you know, you
Speaker 1: and Cooper Loop they're doing all my show prep. You go,
Speaker 1: all right, Yes, it's a fair comparison, right, yes, very similar,
Speaker 1: very smil right. Guess who? All right? A study has
Speaker 1: named blank state the most dangerous place to drive. Now,
Speaker 1: if you're hearing this after New Year's and in January
Speaker 1: one and all that, but this is New Year's eve,
Speaker 1: the most dangerous place to drive? Which state is the
Speaker 1: most dangerous place to drive? David gascon the honorable man.
Speaker 1: I don't know how honorable you are, But do you
Speaker 1: have a possible answer there? Shout out to Tammy. I'll
Speaker 1: say Montana, mon Tanna, not Montana, although you know it's
Speaker 1: not that high. Um the answer Let's see there there's
Speaker 1: one state close to Montana, that's high on the list.
Speaker 1: But no, it's I think I think it's fourth on
Speaker 1: the list. Yeah, Wyoming is. I'm trying to do the math.
Speaker 1: It's not order the list I'm looking at. It is
Speaker 1: not in the right order. But I believe Montana is
Speaker 1: Wyoming rather is a fourth on the list. All right,
Speaker 1: and we'll take another guess. There's the top three here.
Speaker 1: I'm looking at the top three. How about a small one?
Speaker 1: What about New Jersey? Jersey? Uh, not not high up
Speaker 1: on the list. New Jersey, the Garden state. They apparently
Speaker 1: did not. It's not a dangerous place. Let me just
Speaker 1: give you the top three here. According to this this
Speaker 1: is based on fatal motor vehicle crashes on New Year's
Speaker 1: and it's per one thousand drivers. The study goes back
Speaker 1: from to and the state. Let me give you the
Speaker 1: top three here. Number see, number three is none other
Speaker 1: than South Carolina Sandwich, right between North Carolina and Georgia.
Speaker 1: Number two on the list, the great state of Mississippi.
Speaker 1: All right, Mississippi is number two and number one. Boomers sooner,
Speaker 1: Oklahoma number one on the list. You're, according to the study,
Speaker 1: named the most dangerous place for drivers on New Year's
Speaker 1: Eve or New Year's Day, So be safe. Don't if
Speaker 1: you don't want to get in an accident, don't drive
Speaker 1: anywhere right click it, don't get a ticket. They'll see
Speaker 1: you before you see them. Did you see Ed from
Speaker 1: Smoke came? And? Uh? Yeah? He he was tweeting that
Speaker 1: out he or not tweeting he was. He had the
Speaker 1: bullhorn and he was like, he looked like he was
Speaker 1: hammered over. I think Ed just always kind of looks
Speaker 1: like that. And he was in front of the hotels
Speaker 1: in Seattle and he was doing the ps A lines.
Speaker 1: They'll see you before you see them. Man, it was
Speaker 1: pretty good. All right. There's a new study out that
Speaker 1: has linked the rise of opioid overdose deaths to blank
Speaker 1: Did you see this? No, But they say that automotive
Speaker 1: plant closures are linked with the rise of opioid overdose deaths.
Speaker 1: That's bullshit. I think it's bullshit. Also, I think that
Speaker 1: is a false correlation that you are you're putting out.
Speaker 1: I do not believe that at all. I think that
Speaker 1: is bullshit. I agree what else. Researchers estimate upwards of
Speaker 1: blank million US, So I'll just give it the number,
Speaker 1: twenty million US homes are gonna go up for sale
Speaker 1: between the mid thirties. Why, well, no, Well, yeah, the
Speaker 1: baby Boomer generation unfortunately starting to die off, and they're
Speaker 1: moving into assisted living locations. And because of that, all
Speaker 1: the baby boomers that have those nice houses and all that.
Speaker 1: Over the next I guess it's fifteen years or so,
Speaker 1: they're gonna start selling their houses. And that is this now?
Speaker 1: Is this good news or bad news for like jen
Speaker 1: jen x that the next generation after them, the next
Speaker 1: couple of generations, I would think this would be good news, right.
Speaker 1: I think it depends on the market though. If you
Speaker 1: have rent control, then you're in a good spot. But
Speaker 1: if you don't, then you're not so much. Well, but
Speaker 1: if you have rent control, right, if the place turns over,
Speaker 1: then you don't get the rent control, right, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean? Like in Manhattan, if you die, the
Speaker 1: next person that gets the apartment, they jack the rate up, right,
Speaker 1: And how it works anyway, Well, I mean that's that's
Speaker 1: somewhat depressing, But I guess it's the the circle of life, right.
Speaker 1: The generations get older and they pass away, and then
Speaker 1: somebody else comes over and takes their houses. And the game,
Speaker 1: the game keeps going on, Right, it's what what's the
Speaker 1: quote about life? It's you know, it's the same play
Speaker 1: with different actors. You know, it's the same concept, but
Speaker 1: is different actors at different points. All right, what else
Speaker 1: do we have? All right? Researchers pulled third people about
Speaker 1: creeping is and here is what they uncovered. Both men
Speaker 1: and women, we're more likely to rate men as creepy,
Speaker 1: and they try to figure out why. They said it's
Speaker 1: due to elements of physical and sexual danger for men.
Speaker 1: Also found that we are most like to label people
Speaker 1: creepy when we don't understand their behavior or if it
Speaker 1: lies outside of social conventions. They they give some examples here, guest,
Speaker 1: and they said, of like people that stand too close
Speaker 1: during a conversation. Uh, people, this is really good considering
Speaker 1: what you did earlier in this podcast punishing this podcast.
Speaker 1: People that lick their lips often or laugh unpredictably creepy. Uh,
Speaker 1: it creeps people out, according to this study. I don't
Speaker 1: buy that. I don't do Yeah, I believe that I
Speaker 1: read a read a study last week that actually said
Speaker 1: that it's better for a workplace environment if men and
Speaker 1: women flirt at work. Yeah, didn't we talk about that?
Speaker 1: I thought we talked about that. Didn't we talk about
Speaker 1: that one? No? You were you've been off for like
Speaker 1: two weeks. No, the study that studies like two weeks old.
Speaker 1: I we we talked about it. I'm pretty sure we
Speaker 1: talked about it. You don't even remember? No, I got
Speaker 1: a lot, did we? Yes? I like how you try
Speaker 1: to play that all like, oh, I heard this study,
Speaker 1: said I read it. You didn't read it. I talked
Speaker 1: about it right here. You didn't read it. I remember that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's convenient you don't remember that. Well. I play on
Speaker 1: the Betton Mallard tactic. Would I say on the microphone?
Speaker 1: Aren't listening to you back a day or two? Do
Speaker 1: you have any interest? I feel like we've done this
Speaker 1: this one before, but maybe we have it, And of
Speaker 1: course you've probably forgotten it. I know I've apparently forgotten it.
Speaker 1: But there's a new survey out that ranks the rudest
Speaker 1: US cities. A new survey was conducted. Who is the
Speaker 1: rudest of the rude? Any interest in that? I'm I'm curious.
Speaker 1: Oh good, we haven't done this one? All right? This
Speaker 1: is a from Business Insider. They surveyed a bunch of
Speaker 1: US adults in the fall and asked them to pick
Speaker 1: the top five rudest cities in the country from a
Speaker 1: list of the fifty largest cities in the United States. So, hey,
Speaker 1: this is not we did one where the we had
Speaker 1: the most caring city. We did that bullshit a few
Speaker 1: weeks ago. The healthiest I think we did. Yeah, take
Speaker 1: a shot of this. I mean, what are you doing
Speaker 1: trying to peel off some So you'd go like New York,
Speaker 1: l A, Baltimore, Chicago. You're just gonna name all the
Speaker 1: big cities, or you're gonna pick one that's the root
Speaker 1: is you know, I'll go with Pittsburgh. No, what Pittsburgh
Speaker 1: was like one of the kindest or whatever. No, Pittsburgh.
Speaker 1: That's a terrible guess. That's not a terrible guest. It's
Speaker 1: a horrible guess. What up, Philadelphia? What's that Philadelphia? Well,
Speaker 1: phil you that's a good guess. It's not Philadelphia. Now
Speaker 1: you should we do top five? Top ten? What do
Speaker 1: you wanna do? Top five? Do you want to do
Speaker 1: your top five? For time reasons? At all the time
Speaker 1: in the world? Really? Yeah, I mean, podcast is dragging
Speaker 1: on here. I mean, people don't want to hear me.
Speaker 1: I'm on vacation here and they don't that. People are
Speaker 1: upset that I'm working. What do you have to do?
Speaker 1: They're furious that I'm working. You have to do go
Speaker 1: to the kitchen and burn your tongue on another fucking
Speaker 1: burnt pizza. Fuck you all right? Um, that's if Philadelphia
Speaker 1: was number nine. In Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, nine nine percent of
Speaker 1: respondents thought Philly had the rudest inhabitants. Um. I think
Speaker 1: they're fans, are I mean insane? I love people in Philadelphia.
Speaker 1: I have some friends in Philly and they all complain
Speaker 1: about the fact that everyone brings in and yells about
Speaker 1: the throwing of snowballs at Santa Claus, which I think
Speaker 1: happened Gascon in the nineties sixties and is still brought
Speaker 1: up to this day. But but the fans are so
Speaker 1: I hate saying this, but they're a lot more tame
Speaker 1: than what they were in the sixties, seventies and eighties.
Speaker 1: People forget what it was like at the Spectrum, at
Speaker 1: the Vet, all these places. They would get lit up.
Speaker 1: I mean, well, and the thing is too that and
Speaker 1: a lot of that is because you can get away
Speaker 1: with it. Now there's cameras everywhere. It's harder to be
Speaker 1: a dick, you know, and not get caught, I would think,
Speaker 1: because it's it's like a police state. It said, they're
Speaker 1: always watching you, right alright? Number five on the list.
Speaker 1: These are again, if you're you give us nine. What
Speaker 1: was number ten? Well, you said the top five. You
Speaker 1: didn't say the top ten. You asked about Philadelphi. These
Speaker 1: are the rudest US cities, according to a new survey.
Speaker 1: You want me to go to number two. I'm not
Speaker 1: being lazy. You said to speed it up. Make your
Speaker 1: goddamn mind up, whether you want to go quick or
Speaker 1: what not? Here, Okay, I like taking my time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's not what she said. I will go with. Number
Speaker 1: ten is San Francisco, all right, the Bay Area very
Speaker 1: rude there. Number nine Philadelphia, Number eight Baltimore, Maryland. Shout
Speaker 1: out sports with Coleman, my good radio friend there Morning
Speaker 1: Man into name dropping Number seven Buffalo, New York about
Speaker 1: that Bill's mafia man. Yeah, I'm looking forward to then
Speaker 1: this weekend. Don't mess don't mess around. I hope they
Speaker 1: eat Houston. MA. I'm actually pulling for Don't Tell Robbie
Speaker 1: the Mariner fan. I know you are, though I'm pulling
Speaker 1: for Buffalo. Man. Is this more because you like Buffalo
Speaker 1: or more because you hate It's obviously it's schadenfreud. Man.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm all against the shine blocked me on Twitter.
Speaker 1: Screw him. I hope he goes hangs out with the
Speaker 1: Seahawks PR person. All right. Detroit, Michigan is number six.
Speaker 1: Shout out motors city. They are the sixth rudest city
Speaker 1: in the United States. And there you go. A McDonald's
Speaker 1: employee that he's an example. Here. McDonald's employee in December
Speaker 1: was almost tazard over an incident. In June, a woman
Speaker 1: in a wheelchair order the meal then fired her taser
Speaker 1: at an employee because she said her order was taking
Speaker 1: too long. And uh, there you go. It's an example
Speaker 1: that happened in Detroit. Number five. Boston. My people of
Speaker 1: Boston the fifth rudest in the United States. Only one
Speaker 1: of us with the school there. Thank you very much.
Speaker 1: I am a beloved the radio figure in Boston fired
Speaker 1: from Boston twice. I didn't know. I did not get fired.
Speaker 1: I got I got removed because our my main job
Speaker 1: at Fox picked up the other station, and I'll explain
Speaker 1: to you how politics and radio work. They love me.
Speaker 1: I would if w E. I, you know, we were
Speaker 1: on you know, things were different, I would be right
Speaker 1: back on w E. I would. I'm telling you, the
Speaker 1: guys that we love your show was wondering. I screw you. Uh.
Speaker 1: Number four, this is a surprise. Chicago. That is a surprise.
Speaker 1: I think Chicago people are cool, They're down to earth,
Speaker 1: they're nice people. The crime rates pretty high there though,
Speaker 1: well in certain neighborhoods. But like the tourist parts of Chicago,
Speaker 1: you go, it's one. Yeah, there's a certain it's like
Speaker 1: a a demilitarized zone in parts of Chicago. But but
Speaker 1: other parts of it are beautiful. Yeah. Uh. Number three
Speaker 1: on the list Washington, d C. The swamp of Washington,
Speaker 1: d C, America's capital where politics, where the lawmakers of
Speaker 1: the land live during the year. Maybe we should do
Speaker 1: this is a great idea. We should host the mallar
Speaker 1: Man March in d C in November during the election.
Speaker 1: That would be awesome. That would be that would be
Speaker 1: pretty cool. I don't think you, I don't think you
Speaker 1: will like that. Well, it depends what's brother you invited,
Speaker 1: one of them will definitely not be into it. Right.
Speaker 1: Number two on the list, Los Angeele's hello, very rude
Speaker 1: people like you, guesscon assholes in Los Angeles, So bad
Speaker 1: job by you people. Yeah. The problem with with l
Speaker 1: as people are pretentious, narcissistic. Everyone's trying to be famous.
Speaker 1: Everyone thinks they're famous, and everyone's trying to ride the
Speaker 1: coat tails of someone else to be famous, and it
Speaker 1: creates a cesspool. And I love I lived in l
Speaker 1: A in my whole life. I love l A. But
Speaker 1: there's a lot of assholes live in l A. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and half the whole, the whole I'm better than you
Speaker 1: is like who do you know? And I hate that.
Speaker 1: And I don't know if it's like this in other
Speaker 1: parts of the country, correct me if I'm wrong, if
Speaker 1: you experience this in Seattle. But it's like every time
Speaker 1: you go out, whether it's for dinner or drinks or
Speaker 1: happy or whatever, it may be like half the people
Speaker 1: you're either hanging out with it or you see or
Speaker 1: on their cell phones the entire time too. Well, that's everywhere, though,
Speaker 1: it makes that's I think it's every People are on
Speaker 1: their phones, man, and people are just you know it's
Speaker 1: gonna keep what's on the gram. I'm gonna find out
Speaker 1: what's on the grave. A Number one the rudest city
Speaker 1: in the United States of America, according to this study,
Speaker 1: New York, New York the Big Apple. Now, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: tell you this study. I like the concept of it
Speaker 1: from Business Insider, but I think it's bullshit because they
Speaker 1: just rated the three biggest like cities, right New York,
Speaker 1: l A, Chicago or I guess the season there, which
Speaker 1: cruise it up a little bit. But yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: it's come on, why not throw in you know, I
Speaker 1: don't know your boygan or something like to see. Yeah, like, uh,
Speaker 1: I think the fiftiest city on here was like Raleigh,
Speaker 1: North Carolina. But a lot of people haven't been to
Speaker 1: all these cities, you know what I mean, Like most
Speaker 1: people haven't. My guys in Kansas City ranked thirty second.
Speaker 1: What about Salt Lake City? I mean, wow, Portland, Oregon
Speaker 1: was thirty fourth. I know you love Portland's like the
Speaker 1: politics there. Nashville was thirty third, New Orleans, Louisiana in
Speaker 1: the Bayou number thirty five. Memphis was thirty six. Louisville,
Speaker 1: Kentucky shoutout Louisville number thirty seven. Who else do have
Speaker 1: san Antonio? Joe in San Anto? That guy Joe sends
Speaker 1: me these nasty emails. Why are you not on the radio? Maler? Yeah,
Speaker 1: screw you, Joe. Uh. San Antonio is thirty eight. I
Speaker 1: put it higher because of Joe. Oklahoma City and I
Speaker 1: guess we're doing the whole damn list now. Orlando's forty.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to find in salt Lake Riverside, California, number
Speaker 1: forty one. Gas gun, you do a lot of time
Speaker 1: in Riverside, right armpit of America. That's not one of
Speaker 1: the garden spots, although it did produce the great Kawai
Speaker 1: Leonard from the I E. And we're all blessed with
Speaker 1: Kawai when he chooses to play. Yes, this shows up
Speaker 1: from the play the Lakers. Salt Lake City. Here it is.
Speaker 1: I found it number forty seven on the list the
Speaker 1: nice Mormon people of Salt Lake City number uh, number
Speaker 1: forty seven out of the top fifty. Your bff, Colin
Speaker 1: Coward goes to Salt Lake City a lot to go ski. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a big skier. So during the holiday season. Ye.
Speaker 1: So my brother who lives in New York, goes goes
Speaker 1: to Utah to Park City, ut Yeah, that's right. Is
Speaker 1: that where Colin goes. Yeah, it's a great city. Man,
Speaker 1: It's apparently a lot of rich people that go to
Speaker 1: Park City. I don't make enough money to go to
Speaker 1: according to the Internet, I make enough money. If I
Speaker 1: did make enough money, you know, if I had the
Speaker 1: three million dollars the Internet says I have, I would
Speaker 1: fly around, like, you know, four times a year. I
Speaker 1: do these uh these mallard meet and Greek things, walking
Speaker 1: around the streets of whatever city you're on or in
Speaker 1: with headphones in your ears. Right. Well, that that was
Speaker 1: to avoid the homeless people, of course, and I didn't
Speaker 1: want to be impolite. So I noticed. I did a
Speaker 1: little study myself, and I noticed when I put the
Speaker 1: headphones in, people didn't talk to me because I had headphones.
Speaker 1: So they realized, like, he's not gonna hear me anyway.
Speaker 1: That's fine. So that's a that's that's the end of that.
Speaker 1: I think. Well, there's there's a couple other little ones here.
Speaker 1: A galactic letdown. They say that a study on Star
Speaker 1: Wars fans found that expectations of Star Wars movies often
Speaker 1: ruin the fan experience that people are so excited for
Speaker 1: these movies, they don't live up to the excitement when
Speaker 1: they actually see them in the theater. Have you seen
Speaker 1: the new Star Wars movie? That's right? Is it good?
Speaker 1: Because I my wife, I think that's one of the
Speaker 1: things I would be doing this week out she wants
Speaker 1: she loved was going to the movies. It's her favorite thing.
Speaker 1: I just like going to eat popcorn. Um, so I'll
Speaker 1: pretty much see anything with the popcorn. I did see
Speaker 1: the Adam Sandler movie not to get carried away here,
Speaker 1: but I saw that with Kevin Garner Uncut Uncut Gems,
Speaker 1: which had a very interesting ending. Gian Ronda was supposed
Speaker 1: to be in that and uh, he actually missed his
Speaker 1: flight so he was supposed to have a little Really. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I saw Doc Rivers had a came up. My good
Speaker 1: friend Dick Stockton, his voice was in it. I heard
Speaker 1: heard Dick in in the thing, so that was that
Speaker 1: was pretty good. Um, but the star was So did
Speaker 1: you like the new Star Wars movie? You're you're a
Speaker 1: big Star Wars fan. Star Wars fan, but these last
Speaker 1: three have not lived up to the billing one bit. Yeah,
Speaker 1: my thing was Star Wars and it's much like professional wrestling,
Speaker 1: Like it's that golden period when I was a kid,
Speaker 1: the original three Star Wars movies came out right, So
Speaker 1: for me, I feel like I put the baby to
Speaker 1: bed when they had Star Wars, Return of the Jedi
Speaker 1: and what was the The Empire Strikes back? Right was?
Speaker 1: I think that was the word? Um, But those those
Speaker 1: three and then they didn't make any Star Wars movies
Speaker 1: for a long time. I felt like that that was
Speaker 1: the Picasso, that was the Michaelangelo, the veng Go of
Speaker 1: the Star Wars movies. And then they kept making them
Speaker 1: and I was like, I mean, I've seen them, but
Speaker 1: I guess it really depends on whole you are, because
Speaker 1: I'm sure the kids like are younger than you, guys
Speaker 1: are younger than me. You're like, Oh, that's who cares
Speaker 1: about those original Star Wars. Those are hokey, man. The
Speaker 1: real Star Wars are that get like weird green guy
Speaker 1: or whatever. You know, It's like that whole deal. The
Speaker 1: acting was great in the original three. I don't care
Speaker 1: what everyone says. Harrison More was fantastic in it. Shout
Speaker 1: out Princess Leiah Comma, nobody's better than her, Harrison Ford.
Speaker 1: I mean, if you ben because we are a little
Speaker 1: bit dated compared to others. If you had to put
Speaker 1: Carrie Fisher or Princess la next to Daisy Duke, the original,
Speaker 1: who do you who do you pick? Who do you pick? Though?
Speaker 1: That's tough? That's that that What do you call the
Speaker 1: Princess Leia when she had the buns on each side?
Speaker 1: What do you call that? Like? What's that? Look? That's uh,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'd have to google something like that.
Speaker 1: But who do you pick? Right, that's a tough call.
Speaker 1: Duke on the General Lee or you know, Princess Falcon.
Speaker 1: It's hard to go wrong with Daisy Duke, but Princess like,
Speaker 1: she's a damn princess. Come on, you don't get better
Speaker 1: than a princess. I mean, my goodness, Uh, that's what?
Speaker 1: All right? What do we have? Don't stick to sports,
Speaker 1: guest gon, I mean, we'll this is gonna be a
Speaker 1: two hour podcast. We're gonna do a two hour podcast,
Speaker 1: all right. I'm not gonna distaploy with these stories. Fifth
Speaker 1: in the sixth hour, which is actually the first in
Speaker 1: the second hour, exactly it. So we've got two more
Speaker 1: hours to go with no commercial breaks. By the way
Speaker 1: they put. The people at the thing in Seattle were
Speaker 1: telling me how come they just put the commercials in
Speaker 1: the podcast? I said, because if you knew there was
Speaker 1: a commercial, I said, we'll be right back after this,
Speaker 1: you would hit the fast forward button. I would do
Speaker 1: the same thing. I wouldn't listen to any commercials. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean there's a little button on the pot casts
Speaker 1: apps anyway which you can fast forward. Well, I understand that,
Speaker 1: but it's if you don't know it's coming, maybe you
Speaker 1: don't do it. But like Joe, let me ask you
Speaker 1: about Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan is like the god on
Speaker 1: the podcast. Everyone tells me Joe Rogan, this Joe Rogan,
Speaker 1: that he's amazing whatever, good for him, Mozeltov. But doesn't Joe.
Speaker 1: Somebody told me I've listened to Rogan a few times.
Speaker 1: Doesn't he start Joe Rogan his podcast with like eight
Speaker 1: minutes of commercials or something like that. I don't know.
Speaker 1: But who listens to that? If you knew they were
Speaker 1: like seven or eight miss you just fast forward through
Speaker 1: that and get the podcast right. Yeah, but he also
Speaker 1: does a lot of stuff on YouTube as well. Speaking
Speaker 1: of what you're we gonna do that in or we're
Speaker 1: gonna make things more digitally, well, you if you're still
Speaker 1: with us in you can check with corporate and make
Speaker 1: sure we're allowed to do that, and I would be
Speaker 1: all about it. I would be all for that. Putting
Speaker 1: that on YouTube. People find those people that don't go
Speaker 1: on these other platforms and go on YouTube, they'd find
Speaker 1: the show. Well. But but you know, we have bosses
Speaker 1: and you have to. We put a couple of videos
Speaker 1: up in September October. Yeah, listen, I'm all for if
Speaker 1: you want to put it on on the YouTube. Like
Speaker 1: you have the problem getting dressed up, that's your issue,
Speaker 1: so you want to be all you want us on camera.
Speaker 1: I thought you was gonna put it up there with whatever,
Speaker 1: but no, but like, actually, haven't you look like you
Speaker 1: didn't get out of bed when you come into the studio.
Speaker 1: Means not wearing sweats or sandals, shirt untucked, like brushing
Speaker 1: your toeth all stuff. I don't shower, I don't brush
Speaker 1: my teeth, I don't use any kind of lotions. That
Speaker 1: does not happen at all. How about this a hospital
Speaker 1: in Romania using Romania. We don't talk enough Romania on
Speaker 1: the show. There's one thing that's missing is Romania's great story. Though.
Speaker 1: They use an alcohol based disinfectant on a woman, a patient,
Speaker 1: and this one was sixties six years of age. They
Speaker 1: used it on her before carrying out an operation for
Speaker 1: pancreatic cancer just a couple of weeks ago. The only
Speaker 1: problem with this bend is they then use an electric scalpel,
Speaker 1: which then ignited because the alcohol. So they lit the
Speaker 1: woman on fire while they were operating on her. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, of her body was burned and then she
Speaker 1: died later that week in the hospital. Wait wait, so
Speaker 1: this woman not bad enough? She had the pancreatic cancer,
Speaker 1: which is a terrible, terrible thing. I mean, that's I mean,
Speaker 1: we lost our boss at Fox Sports Radio years ago
Speaker 1: from that. It's a horrible thing that the Great Andrew
Speaker 1: ash would may he rest in peace. But they litterr
Speaker 1: on fire like like she was like a fried turkey
Speaker 1: on Thanksgiving or something like that, and the kaboom. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's horrible, that's great, it's terrible. Man, Was that was
Speaker 1: the doctor named Doc Mike? By chance? Was that the doctor?
Speaker 1: You know? Doc Mike trying to call me out on
Speaker 1: Twitter the other day. It's really classless of him. I
Speaker 1: expect an apology once you return to the airwaves. I
Speaker 1: want you to know that Doc does not know what
Speaker 1: Twitter is. So there's a probably a Doc mic impersonator
Speaker 1: that called you out, but Doc himself he has no
Speaker 1: concept of the Twitter machine at all. Well, how does
Speaker 1: he listen to you? Then? Uh? Well, he called is in.
Speaker 1: I don't even know if he listens. To be honest
Speaker 1: with he, Like I said, he'll go out. We're on
Speaker 1: in the suburbs with Chicago, so sometimes he'll drive out
Speaker 1: to the sticks to listen and all that. So by way,
Speaker 1: I'm getting messages here are we Are you almost done?
Speaker 1: People are in the building I'm in here are asking
Speaker 1: if I'm done? Is it's not way? That's gonna go
Speaker 1: on for another five hours because you know we have
Speaker 1: things to do. But I'm resting. How about this though,
Speaker 1: guessco All right, this is an interesting question. We're all
Speaker 1: gonna die, We're all gonna you know, meet our and
Speaker 1: that's guarantee. We're all born with the fatal illness called life.
Speaker 1: No one's gotten out of life, right? Is it better?
Speaker 1: Wouldn't it have been better for that woman if she
Speaker 1: had just lived her life and died of pancreatic cancer,
Speaker 1: which would have happened most pancreatic cancer leads to death.
Speaker 1: Or is it better that she went out this way
Speaker 1: and she's become an international celebrity. We didn't say her name,
Speaker 1: but I mean, what do you talk about going out
Speaker 1: in a blaze of glory and being you know, famous
Speaker 1: for this and not that she wanted that to happen. Um,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like, I think it's better
Speaker 1: to go out this way, and I think the majority
Speaker 1: of the people will agree with me, because cancer is
Speaker 1: obviously painful, the medication if you're going through therapy and chemo,
Speaker 1: and this one was probably put our shoes, probably under anesthesia,
Speaker 1: so she probably didn't feel anything. There You go, look
Speaker 1: at that serenaded by the sound of fire, Like, I
Speaker 1: love how we're just closing out the year with something
Speaker 1: dark for you to talk about life and death. That's
Speaker 1: absolutely you brought it up, schmuck. Don't bring it up
Speaker 1: all right? How about that? If you want me to
Speaker 1: be like Charles Dickens here Williams Shakespeare is something like
Speaker 1: that and wats like a poet? I'd really be like,
Speaker 1: the only poet I knew was a kid was Dr Seuss,
Speaker 1: Green Eggs and Hams. Right, That's what I grew up with.
Speaker 1: How's my poet? How about this? Aaron Rodgers and Danna
Speaker 1: ka Patrick just made a huge purchase out in the
Speaker 1: West Coast in Malibu. They bought a beachfront villa. Ben
Speaker 1: estimated total in this house twenty eight million dollars. Really, Yeah,
Speaker 1: where where is this? What part of Malibu is it? Yeah? Off, ah,
Speaker 1: that's your area, your beach. It's nice. Yeah, Oh you
Speaker 1: want to live in Malibu. Huh. They got a couple
Speaker 1: of cougar dens there there. One's called moon Shadows. Uh no, boo.
Speaker 1: Is there a sushi restaurant, Mastros is there on the coast? Yeah. Pepperdine.
Speaker 1: Pepperdine is there too. I'm aware that Pepperdine is there.
Speaker 1: I've been to the campus. It's a nice campus. They
Speaker 1: got a little bit of money there. Yeah. The baseball
Speaker 1: diamond looks over the Pacific Ocean. It's an absolutely gorgeous view.
Speaker 1: I've done baseball games there. Look at you. Bumble brag
Speaker 1: gas on humble Brag Gascon. Yeah. Do you like Malibu? No?
Speaker 1: I don't. I've been there. I I used to one
Speaker 1: of the guys I worked with in radio. There was
Speaker 1: a bar in Malibu and he wanted to He always
Speaker 1: wanted to go, and because they're sometimes there would be
Speaker 1: famous people that would come in there, and he always
Speaker 1: wanted to hang out. I I, I'm not really into that.
Speaker 1: First of all, these days, I don't even know who's
Speaker 1: famous and who's not famous, so they would do nothing
Speaker 1: for me. Uh, And it's expensive, and it's kind of
Speaker 1: far from where I am. Even then it was far
Speaker 1: from where I was, So it's not my thing. All right.
Speaker 1: Last two? Would you rather go with m getting holy
Speaker 1: or password? I mean, come on? Password? The word Game
Speaker 1: of the Stars? All right? How about this the worst
Speaker 1: passwords for two thousand nineteen, according to splash data. Can
Speaker 1: you alright? Let me let me yes, let me guess one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: so it goes to nine. But you got that one? Okay,
Speaker 1: A B C D right or no? No, that one's
Speaker 1: not on there? All right? How about one to three
Speaker 1: A BC No, that was not How about password? Passwords
Speaker 1: in there? That's number that's actually number two from So
Speaker 1: how about how about this one one, one, one, one one, Okay,
Speaker 1: so seven ones, that's number nine on the list. Um,
Speaker 1: all right, that's it. I those are the ones I
Speaker 1: would think would be right there. All right, So you
Speaker 1: got the majority of them, right, I did by your
Speaker 1: first guest. So one through nine is number two. The
Speaker 1: top password that's been used is one, two, three, four,
Speaker 1: five six. But a lot of the websites these days
Speaker 1: will not even allow you to do. You have to
Speaker 1: put a letter and a number and a capital, and
Speaker 1: you have to put like a period or an exclamation
Speaker 1: point or something like. You know, they put all these
Speaker 1: different rules in there. Yeah, I love you was number eight, uh,
Speaker 1: and then I love you yeah spelled out not one
Speaker 1: for three. Um, and then number ten was one to three,
Speaker 1: one to three. Oh is that a right one to yeah?
Speaker 1: Making making other week passwords? I guess amongst the top
Speaker 1: twenty five admin well welcome six three to one and
Speaker 1: then five five five five five five. Wow. People are
Speaker 1: so smart. It is a pain in the ass, though.
Speaker 1: To keep to be fair, it's I mean, you have
Speaker 1: a million different things going on with passwords, and I
Speaker 1: I was when I was in Seattle. I was trying
Speaker 1: to log into something. I could not remember the password.
Speaker 1: Oh boy, I needed the zip code. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I've moved. I don't know the zip code where I'm
Speaker 1: out of Like I saw my driver's license, but then
Speaker 1: I I text my weapon. It was the zip code.
Speaker 1: Oh man, you know, as I was all out of it.
Speaker 1: But it's a pain in the ass. And then and
Speaker 1: then you get locked out, like if you try to
Speaker 1: you know, that's the thing that's you type in the
Speaker 1: wrong password enough times and then you get locked out
Speaker 1: of the account. Well I like Google now because if
Speaker 1: you have a Gmail account and you want to have
Speaker 1: double the security on it, you can actually have Google
Speaker 1: send you a notification if you want to log down
Speaker 1: with a key code. I did that because my my
Speaker 1: email popped up on a list of hacked accounts, and
Speaker 1: so my brother, the one in New York, said, hey,
Speaker 1: you gotta you gotta crank your game up. So I said,
Speaker 1: all right, yeah, I I need you to change the
Speaker 1: password to real fifth hour with Ben Maller or real
Speaker 1: fifth hour at gmail dot com. I need you to
Speaker 1: change that pastor because I went on it the other
Speaker 1: day just to take a look at the emails that
Speaker 1: we were getting and the spam folder was filled with
Speaker 1: a Muslim dating site. Yes it was. I mean you're
Speaker 1: a single guy, guest was we don't have you have
Speaker 1: a problem dating a nice Muslim woman. It was Muslim man.
Speaker 1: It was Muslim. What's wrong with that? You know? Yeah,
Speaker 1: this is there's this place for everybody in the world.
Speaker 1: Last one, we end this one with a bang. Father.
Speaker 1: Stephen Krosnan is thirty seven years of age. Ben. He
Speaker 1: did uh, he did something a little wrong and you
Speaker 1: will hate this. He was He was caught on video
Speaker 1: in a room filled with Nazi memorabilia and he was
Speaker 1: snorting cocaine at a church party. Oh that's trying to live.
Speaker 1: Hair down a little bit, give a break, Come on.
Speaker 1: Nothing like Marge Shots grandson or something like that, the
Speaker 1: old owner of the Reds. There's an outdated reference for
Speaker 1: those of you old enough to remember. Yeah, shout out
Speaker 1: Ron Washington too, right shot way around Washington. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know. I stood next to Marge Shot, the Red's owner,
Speaker 1: at Dodger Stadium for and she was such a small,
Speaker 1: grizzly woman. I think she was like like four four
Speaker 1: ft eight or something like that and I you know,
Speaker 1: I'm six six. It was it was odd, it was bizarre, man,
Speaker 1: But yeah, I know this is not about Marsha. So
Speaker 1: this guy, what happened to this guy? So he's hanging
Speaker 1: out with the Nazis, he's got the coke going and
Speaker 1: uh is too? By did he overdose? He was doing
Speaker 1: this at eleven o'clock in the morning too. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: quite the church. There's the Church of Satan. Is that
Speaker 1: the church he's at? It was a Catholic church man, Yeah. St.
Speaker 1: Patrick's Church. Well isn't that a fitting way to close
Speaker 1: this out? Guest Scot, You've done it yet again. I'm
Speaker 1: not sticking to sports and we how long is this?
Speaker 1: Probably almost two hours? Right? This podcast is close to
Speaker 1: two hours. Yes, I need to I need to eat.
Speaker 1: I have been fasting all day this morning. Um, are
Speaker 1: we taking any ideas of how we're going to differ
Speaker 1: in Uh, Well, we'll actually be good and maybe do
Speaker 1: a good instead of a marginal podcast. It will be
Speaker 1: a good podcast and and maybe we'll actually get paid
Speaker 1: for it, which you know would be a nice addition, right,
Speaker 1: you know, it would be a nice addition. And I'm
Speaker 1: gonna I'm gonna. I'm gonna cautiously be optimistic about that
Speaker 1: because I know you're You're the name of this, You're
Speaker 1: the the driver of it. Uh, apparently we can't do
Speaker 1: anything unless you're around. Well no, I actually I was
Speaker 1: telling my wife is you know. I told Gustcan I
Speaker 1: wanted to do something later in the week. You sa
Speaker 1: I'm not available. He says, I'm not available. That's it,
Speaker 1: And and so here we are. We I had to
Speaker 1: I had to change my schedule. I to adjust my
Speaker 1: schedule for you. And and I was like, why shouldn't
Speaker 1: that be the other way Russian gascon? I have to
Speaker 1: look at justice schedule for me? And I know I've
Speaker 1: been waiting for two weeks. You've been on two weeks.
Speaker 1: You've been on vacation for two weeks. That's not that
Speaker 1: was last week? Was that was zero last week? And
Speaker 1: here we are back again. Boom. It seems like done.
Speaker 1: It seems like can I leave? Am I done? Okay?
Speaker 1: I have things to do. Yeah, it's my vacation. You've
Speaker 1: completely ruined it. Now you've taken one vacation day away
Speaker 1: with this never ending podcast. Anyway, I really want to
Speaker 1: thank all the people of the Pacific Northwest. You rolled
Speaker 1: out the red carpet. You were very nice. Big thanks
Speaker 1: to Jesse, Jay Scoop, Megan his girlfriend, wonderful couple, good people,
Speaker 1: and of course Ed from Spokane and Christina and and
Speaker 1: everyone else that came out and I had a wonderful time.
Speaker 1: I'll be back on the radio next week, the first
Speaker 1: full week of January, and we'll talk about wild Card weekend.
Speaker 1: We'll have all the crazy bits and all that. Hopefully
Speaker 1: some new stuff. I'm working on some new liners for Eddie,
Speaker 1: so he'll be annoyed by that. Will debut the new
Speaker 1: liners and all that for the show, promoting the program.
Speaker 1: So we're excited about that. But to be safe over
Speaker 1: New Year's enjoy yourself. We can't lose any listeners. To
Speaker 1: make sure you're healthy and and make it and and
Speaker 1: be safe and uh and mozelto have a great end.
Speaker 1: The twenty nineteen beginning of We'll catch you on the
Speaker 1: radio next week. Boom. If you thought more hours a day,
Speaker 1: minutes a week, was enough, think again. He's the last
Speaker 1: remnants of the old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness.
Speaker 1: He treats crackheads in the ghetto Cutter the same as
Speaker 1: the rich pill poppers in the Penthouse to clearinghouse of
Speaker 1: hot takes, break Free for something special. Fifth Hour with
Speaker 1: Ben Maller starts right now. Yeah, are you there? Yeah?
Speaker 1: You ready to do this? Yeah? You didn't hear the music?
Speaker 1: All right? I didn't. You didn't say all right. I
Speaker 1: thought you were just testing it out, dick, and I'm
Speaker 1: a vacation asshole. Fuck you.