Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2: So today's episode, you guys, it's what's wrong my hair?
Speaker 2: Can we talk about hair? I mean you, guys, I
Speaker 2: try not to be vain. I'm just like, can a
Speaker 2: girl like, can I just get hair for a second?
Speaker 3: Can we talk about does anyone notice anything? Are your
Speaker 3: extensions gone? I thought you didn't blow dry? I'm not sure.
Speaker 3: Always do sound quite vain? Right now?
Speaker 1: I like your butterflies all Diama, stay on topic. Butterflies,
Speaker 1: that shiny squirrel?
Speaker 3: Okay, did you cut it?
Speaker 2: Well? This goes to the conversation that I had with
Speaker 2: you earlier this morning about what I what I think
Speaker 2: I have.
Speaker 3: I have no idea, so I want to say so
Speaker 3: much about that?
Speaker 2: Can I?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: And no?
Speaker 3: Second, that's so clueless? What is happening?
Speaker 2: So it kind of goes along with our topics of
Speaker 2: like when people say, okay, you know, like I gotta hey,
Speaker 2: can you call me?
Speaker 3: And I was just like done, done, done, okay, go
Speaker 3: ahead time now, So I'm not as conditioned. Do I
Speaker 3: tell my side of the story first or do you
Speaker 3: tell yours? I don't know they're funny either way. So
Speaker 3: about let's.
Speaker 2: See I'm about two nope, about five weeks postpartum, y'all.
Speaker 3: I have.
Speaker 2: I have had the itchiest scalp. I mean, itching's so bad.
Speaker 2: I'm like digging my nails into my head, like the
Speaker 2: itchiest scalp. Right, And so I'm doctor Google, so I
Speaker 2: go on and I'm just like googling.
Speaker 3: So so I go.
Speaker 2: On Google and they're like, oh, it's it's yeah, it's
Speaker 2: like it could be your hormones or whatever. So I
Speaker 2: don't think anything of it and it's probably gonna go away.
Speaker 3: I read some.
Speaker 2: Article like whatever those forums are, and it's like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I had it too. Oh my gosh, crazy itchy scalp.
Speaker 2: So she's doing it as I'm itching. My scalp's amazing.
Speaker 2: So cut to after Christmas and I'm still just like
Speaker 2: itching everywhere, and then it's like in the back of
Speaker 2: my neck, in my ear and I'm like do I
Speaker 2: have lice? Like why am I itching?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 2: So I contact my doctor and I'm like, hey, I'm
Speaker 2: like having such bad itching. Like it's actually depressing me
Speaker 2: because I'm like something's wrong again, like you know, the
Speaker 2: postpartum everything. I'm just kind of like, can I just
Speaker 2: not have something going wrong, like versus is the kidney
Speaker 2: it exists?
Speaker 3: Is that?
Speaker 2: And then the baby? And then I came to that
Speaker 2: and so I'm like I'm so I'm like, now I'm itching,
Speaker 2: like comfortable love, Yeah, it's just exists in your own
Speaker 2: body for a second. Yeah, like I have to actively
Speaker 2: choose not to scratch my head even though I feel
Speaker 2: like I have to. So anyway, so I email the doctor.
Speaker 2: I'm like, is this normal? She's like no, and I'm like, well,
Speaker 2: you know what happens when someone tells me something is normal.
Speaker 2: So now I'm yeah, may just problem like I have.
Speaker 3: M Yes, I have.
Speaker 2: Because it's like there's all the things of like what
Speaker 2: it like causes itching or whatever. So she's like, I
Speaker 2: would recommend going to see a dermatologist. So I'm like, okay,
Speaker 2: So I go see doctor Lee and she's amazing. She
Speaker 2: does my botox like she's great. So she also like
Speaker 2: her main things like she's a very like she's a
Speaker 2: very good dermatologist.
Speaker 3: And so she's.
Speaker 2: Looking and she's like why don't She's like, you have
Speaker 2: no dandriff. So it's not anything dry your your scalp. Look,
Speaker 2: there's no nothing on your scalp. She's like, and then
Speaker 2: you know, she's looking anywhere. I was like, well, this
Speaker 2: itch is over here, and like this, I have a
Speaker 2: random itch here and like this kind of itches. And
Speaker 2: she's like, there's no bumps, there's no hot I'm like, then,
Speaker 2: what is it?
Speaker 4: Right?
Speaker 2: And so then she draws an AX on my arm right,
Speaker 2: so I'm gonna do it right here. So she draws
Speaker 2: an AX on my arm and then she does an
Speaker 2: X on the lady in the office. My skin makes
Speaker 2: an AX. So if we were to do an AX
Speaker 2: on yours like mine in about one minute will look
Speaker 2: like a big red AX. So there's something in my
Speaker 2: body that's like an autoimmune that's attacking. Something's attacking my
Speaker 2: body and we don't know what it is. So because
Speaker 2: like the other lady h hers didn't have an X,
Speaker 2: and mine that gets a red X because it's my
Speaker 2: skin reacting whatever. So she's like, I need to take
Speaker 2: some blood work from you. And I'm like, doctor, not really,
Speaker 2: like what do I have. She's like, no, right, I
Speaker 2: was like, but what could it be? She's like, I
Speaker 2: have some fear. So like I see it's turning to
Speaker 2: be an X right there. It's like red red X.
Speaker 2: You would not have that if I did that to you,
Speaker 2: So listen to this.
Speaker 3: So I kind of want to test, so I do that.
Speaker 2: So she's like, well, it could be a couple of things,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, break it down. What am I dying of?
Speaker 2: You know, because I go straight to like I'm dying.
Speaker 2: She's like, you could have lupus. You could have kidney failure,
Speaker 2: kidney disease. And I'm like kidney. Oh my god. Oh
Speaker 2: so I spoilal because I'm like all that kidney issue
Speaker 2: I had. I go doctor Lee, I had like massive
Speaker 2: kidney infections when I was pregnant. And she's like, it
Speaker 2: could be the napps your kidney and so I'm gonna
Speaker 2: need you to go, like right now, to go get
Speaker 2: like some blood work, just like because it could be
Speaker 2: like you're saying that your kidneys are feeling So no,
Speaker 2: look where I ride my AXSS not marim.
Speaker 3: So I'm like, oh my god. So I'm like googling.
Speaker 2: Kidney disease and I'm like I'm giving myself one week
Speaker 2: to live. Like it's like okdating, Like it's bad. So
Speaker 2: I go and you know, it could be a few
Speaker 2: it could be my thyroid. A thyroid also causes itching
Speaker 2: if it's like a high whatever. So you see how yeah,
Speaker 2: so interesting? Uh huh. So I go, so my my
Speaker 2: levels come back, She's like, you're a little low, and
Speaker 2: like a few of the things. She's like, but nothing
Speaker 2: that causes kidney, nothing that causes thyroid, nothing that you
Speaker 2: don't have lupus. And so I'm like, okay, then what
Speaker 2: is it? Because I can not stop itching. So the
Speaker 2: other night and again I don't know if this is
Speaker 2: actually what it is, but now I'm going to go,
Speaker 2: like further look into this because I cannot figure it out.
Speaker 2: And now I'm like a month and a half in
Speaker 2: and I'm like driving myself nuts right with this itch
Speaker 2: and the take took my extension out, like maybe it's
Speaker 2: something with my extensions randomly like so I'm like I'm
Speaker 2: smart and eliminating everything. I took away every supplement, every
Speaker 2: like everything, like nothing has changed in my diet, nothing,
Speaker 2: nothing at all.
Speaker 3: So sorry scratching a life pause for a head scratch.
Speaker 2: So the other day I'm like, I see Jolie itching
Speaker 2: your head and I'm like, give me your arm. So
Speaker 2: I make an X on her arm and her arm
Speaker 2: does look at you see this, it's still a red
Speaker 2: in mine? But do you see I'm doing mine? You
Speaker 2: see my red X? Right, Yeah, it's still red. So
Speaker 2: he's been doing the same thing. So I'm very curious.
Speaker 2: So I and I'm looking at her. I was like, holy,
Speaker 2: she's got a red X. And so I text doctor
Speaker 2: Lee and I was like, not sure if these two
Speaker 2: are connected, but I'm trying to figure this out. Do
Speaker 2: you see how like long mine's still staying there though
Speaker 2: X you guys this this this episode would be called
Speaker 2: X Marx the Spot, but yeah, so anyways, so I'm like,
Speaker 2: give you it could be called if you're looking, Oh,
Speaker 2: here's just going right?
Speaker 3: I know, I'm quite can can you get too quickly?
Speaker 3: So no?
Speaker 2: So well, so what I texted Doctor Lee with and
Speaker 2: her I'm just going to tending to text it's really red?
Speaker 3: What do we have? How hard did you scratch it?
Speaker 3: I mean I did scratch it to like see you
Speaker 3: gotta like yeah, so do that one.
Speaker 2: So you keep that one? Okay, so quickly, what am
Speaker 2: I diagnosedes?
Speaker 3: What text?
Speaker 2: So I text actually and I go, she goes, how
Speaker 2: do you feeling? I go, still still itching? Scalp and
Speaker 2: the exit on my arm. My daughter said, her head
Speaker 2: scratches and her arm made an X. But maybe that's
Speaker 2: just coincidence. She goes, Oh, and maybe you guys have scabies.
Speaker 2: And I'm like, what the fuck is that?
Speaker 3: Did I get on this couch?
Speaker 1: I'm like, I can promise you right now you do
Speaker 1: not remember I had it years ago.
Speaker 3: It's scaby. It's the worst thing I've ever been through
Speaker 3: in my entire life. Okay, well under your skin.
Speaker 1: I know you don't remember. I stayed home for like months.
Speaker 3: What is it? Because the name of it sounds.
Speaker 1: It's terrible, And I can promise you you wouldn't be
Speaker 1: able to sleep.
Speaker 3: No, I can't. I have to take sleeping pills because
Speaker 3: the itching. Do you would see marks? Though you would
Speaker 3: have ration stuff? I do have that. Ex Do I
Speaker 3: have this?
Speaker 2: Or is this just a human response to scratching yourself?
Speaker 2: Because I swear the well, then what is the itching?
Speaker 1: I mean it was, and again we weren't one hundred
Speaker 1: percent that that's what I had, but I mean it
Speaker 1: was the most miserable I've ever been. And I mean,
Speaker 1: you itch your entire but it's awful unless it's just
Speaker 1: getting what.
Speaker 3: You should.
Speaker 1: Want to look up look it up and there's like
Speaker 1: these lines that will show up on your skin.
Speaker 3: Have you never admitted that?
Speaker 2: But it was terrible, But like why would it randomly?
Speaker 2: Thank you for sharing that with us and being so authentic.
Speaker 3: Well, I mean I still don't know.
Speaker 1: I mean I had traveled a lot, but like nice hotels,
Speaker 1: like nothing grow not you know, whatever.
Speaker 3: What do you get? Is it like a contact thing?
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, yeah, it would have had to have
Speaker 1: been from like infected like sheets somewhere or something. But
Speaker 1: I mean I hadn't stayed anywhere or not grown you know,
Speaker 1: I hadn't who knows how, But it's it's like the
Speaker 1: most embarrassing. I was in the middle of summer. I'd
Speaker 1: go to soft baseball games and I'd wear full long sleeves.
Speaker 2: Last it was months for me. Is it perpetuated by
Speaker 2: something like? That's why I was like, have you eaten gluten?
Speaker 2: Maybe it's your body's reaction to gluten.
Speaker 3: It just wouldn't randomly happen, I feel like.
Speaker 1: But also side note to this, I'm literally dealing with
Speaker 1: the same thing with immy. This is so interesting chicking
Speaker 1: at her head seeing if there's there's no dandriff, there's
Speaker 1: no like she can't stop.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I've got lasting I've been using.
Speaker 1: Like she'll be out there at tumbling and she can't stop.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you look like a dog, like sketching yourself.
Speaker 3: We looked.
Speaker 1: I looked for lice, like I literally she was like,
Speaker 1: will you just take me to a lice place and
Speaker 1: make sure, Like that's how much she's it.
Speaker 3: We have to figure this out on her.
Speaker 1: But I told her whatever shampoo she's been using, to
Speaker 1: just eliminate it, Like we're just gonna eliminate things.
Speaker 2: So I want saying, but like not working, like literally not.
Speaker 2: I'm like I don't so like if you figured it out,
Speaker 2: let me know.
Speaker 3: I mean, that's crazy.
Speaker 2: I get very doctor house about stuff like that. Still
Speaker 2: doesn't help. Like so it's like it's something in mine
Speaker 2: still there is you're still.
Speaker 3: And it's dry weather, So what does that mean?
Speaker 2: I have something that my body is fighting that's causing
Speaker 2: the reaction. So something is in.
Speaker 1: Having a reaction to stuff is like that's what alopecia is.
Speaker 1: It's like you're it attacks the hair follicles in your
Speaker 1: you know, your hair falls out or whatever and that's
Speaker 1: an autoimmune so it's all very similar, but we're.
Speaker 2: Both post part does that matter yours isn't really like
Speaker 2: m I'd like to do it, okay, but I just
Speaker 2: wonder if it's something to do with like our bodies
Speaker 2: getting back in balance.
Speaker 3: I don't know, but why that because my head.
Speaker 1: I know that's if we could all if someone could
Speaker 1: let us know who I.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because it's driving me mad and I'm like, I
Speaker 2: just I can't do it. But the funny thing was,
Speaker 2: is I just, you know, just dealing with some things.
Speaker 2: And so I haven't called back Kristen. And then I said, hey,
Speaker 2: can you can you call? Can you call me? Call
Speaker 2: me back? And you run the phone right. So Monday
Speaker 2: I text her. I get nothing back. Fine, totally fine,
Speaker 2: she's in postpartum. I give grace on grace and grace right.
Speaker 2: I'm not that girl. Yesterday a facetimer because I'm like,
Speaker 2: I just want to see you, like a little visual
Speaker 2: check in. I like to get like a temperature read
Speaker 2: you know, no answer, huh. So then I send her
Speaker 2: the song I just called to say I love you,
Speaker 2: because I thought maybe she just needs to know that
Speaker 2: that's okay.
Speaker 3: Wherever she is no answer nothing.
Speaker 2: And then today quick call thought it was a butt
Speaker 2: dial though, like I missed it, but that was weird.
Speaker 2: I was working by my phone. Then I get a hey,
Speaker 2: can you call me? I call her, go straight to voicemail.
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, alrighty, what are we dealing with? And
Speaker 2: then and then I said to sweet Christine, who's at
Speaker 2: my house, I said it's weird, and she goes, well,
Speaker 2: are you worried? And I said no, not really, because
Speaker 2: the thing with Jana is it could be, hey, can
Speaker 2: you call me? I have a scab on my toe,
Speaker 2: or you're fired from mind down, like it could be
Speaker 2: any of the things. And I just think there's not
Speaker 2: anything we can't handle.
Speaker 3: So that I call her. She's if you could.
Speaker 2: I was like, I was like, yeah, I got talk
Speaker 2: to something, but I might also have scabies, and she's like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, this is home.
Speaker 3: I was like, right on this, right on target.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Anyways, okay, we've we've kept it very light. Our
Speaker 2: next guest is in the waiting room, and in this one,
Speaker 2: it's so hard because I don't know what to say.
Speaker 2: She obviously lost her husband twitch to suicide over a
Speaker 2: year ago, and I knew her from It's Alison Holker
Speaker 2: Boss from Dancing with the Stars, and I knew knew
Speaker 2: I was on her season when she was on there,
Speaker 2: and it's just like, what do you even say?
Speaker 3: And so I had to be.
Speaker 2: Really like, I'll be honest, probably will cry during this episode.
Speaker 2: But I had to be like really prayerful yeah about
Speaker 2: all of this, because I, you know, like I've shared
Speaker 2: with you, had a really similar ark times in life
Speaker 2: where like that was an option in my brain. Sure,
Speaker 2: so I think that is what is It's just I
Speaker 2: don't know. I'm just I had to be like I
Speaker 2: was like, I don't know, I just was really prayerful. Well,
Speaker 2: let's take a break get around. But first I have
Speaker 2: to ask Hannah Jackie Easton, did you guys do the
Speaker 2: X and do you have an X on your arm?
Speaker 4: I did? I knew you guys. I knew you guys
Speaker 4: are doing it.
Speaker 3: Like I'm like, there's no screens off vaccine? Do you guys?
Speaker 2: Does it?
Speaker 3: Is it still there? No mind thought the one you
Speaker 3: did isn't really super there. Yeah, You're just the whole.
Speaker 1: Time though you guys are talking about it.
Speaker 3: I was crashing my head.
Speaker 2: Well, I know now I feel like I have an
Speaker 2: itchy sculptor from association.
Speaker 3: All right, anyways, let's take a break and they'll get
Speaker 3: alicon on.
Speaker 4: I love how are you?
Speaker 3: I love you?
Speaker 2: I love your energy always, and I just remember when
Speaker 2: I did Dance with the Stars and you were obviously
Speaker 2: the pro that season with babyface, right, yes, And I
Speaker 2: just remember like you were just so like your energy
Speaker 2: was amazing. You were so sweet, so welcoming, and like
Speaker 2: I just really I've always like appreciated that and like
Speaker 2: you're just a beautiful soul. So thank you for always
Speaker 2: being that and sharing that with other people too.
Speaker 4: Thank you. I appreciate that you're so kind. I remember
Speaker 4: we had so much fun that season. It was really wonderful.
Speaker 4: Everyone was great. It felt like a little family was awesome.
Speaker 4: So I'm happy to be here.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're sweet. Do I start?
Speaker 4: Well?
Speaker 3: I love you.
Speaker 2: It's just aggressive to say, how loud. But it's funny
Speaker 2: because I don't scroll anymore on Instagram. I kind of
Speaker 2: made a promise to myself, but if I ever see you,
Speaker 2: I always click because you're fun, your outfits are fun
Speaker 2: and you're always moving. So I'm not a dancer, but
Speaker 2: I married a dancer. Ish Pasa is not a dancer,
Speaker 2: he used. I don't know how much he would want
Speaker 2: me to share publicly. He's not like a dancer, like
Speaker 2: cool like choreographers. Wait you know, but again he's are
Speaker 2: you serious? Yeah, he's getting a text later. It's like
Speaker 2: backstreet boys, like he will pull out some moves, so
Speaker 2: we will always We always have watched you and your
Speaker 2: late husband because he was like, look at these two together,
Speaker 2: something I could never do.
Speaker 3: I can't five six seven eight to save my life.
Speaker 2: So I would always be like, well, then we can
Speaker 2: just watch them because they're amazing and beautiful.
Speaker 3: But I've always enjoyed thoroughly.
Speaker 2: Just your presence, like how much fun, how much life
Speaker 2: and light you guys have shared with your world. And
Speaker 2: we dance party at our house to mostly to shake
Speaker 2: up my own sads. I've struggled with bouts of depression
Speaker 2: a lot, actually, but we dance to get that out.
Speaker 2: But it's not nearly as choreographed and cute as you.
Speaker 2: But we do dance in our kitchen. It's a little
Speaker 2: less hot. But I've just always really appreciated your presence.
Speaker 2: And I will say this and we don't have to
Speaker 2: stay here. But I just want you to know that,
Speaker 2: like the moment I found out about the passing of
Speaker 2: your husband, it was an absolute gut punch, as I
Speaker 2: know I can't even imagine obviously, but for the rest
Speaker 2: of the world being on our side of things, it
Speaker 2: was so unexpected feeling because he is such a light.
Speaker 2: And I think that is the one thing that I
Speaker 2: wish people knew more about, was that that is always
Speaker 2: there too for people that struggle with anything that is dark,
Speaker 2: that we can dance it out and we can move
Speaker 2: and through those things. But like you, guys are so
Speaker 2: loved and you will stay so loved, And I'm just
Speaker 2: so thankful that you got to share your world with us.
Speaker 2: From my seat in the world.
Speaker 4: Thank you. That's really sweet. I appreciate everything you just said,
Speaker 4: and you know it's I wish and I hope that
Speaker 4: we can bring more awareness to mental health and make
Speaker 4: people feel more comfortable when they need to ask for
Speaker 4: help and when they need to talk something out, and
Speaker 4: making them feel seen and heard, where you're not going
Speaker 4: to be looked at different if you ask for help,
Speaker 4: and I think that's a big thing and a big stigma,
Speaker 4: specifically for men. Really that no one's going to look
Speaker 4: down on you just because you might need a little
Speaker 4: bit of an extra hug or a talk, or need
Speaker 4: to go somewhere, need to find somewhere, whatever it is
Speaker 4: that you're struggling with. I just hope that we can
Speaker 4: change that stigma and really bring awareness that having a
Speaker 4: talk with someone does not make you and make you
Speaker 4: look small or feel small to someone else.
Speaker 2: I think we as a society need to be more
Speaker 2: mindful the way we parent boys in general, just because
Speaker 2: I you know, like I don't know and parenting just
Speaker 2: the intention with parenting period. But I do agree with
Speaker 2: everything you're saying. There's a certain pressure or stigma put
Speaker 2: on them as a gender that doesn't feel fair too,
Speaker 2: and like you have to be big and brave in
Speaker 2: all the things. In reality, you're still just the person
Speaker 2: and God made you and loves you well. And I'll
Speaker 2: say too, Allison again, we're gonna we're going to go
Speaker 2: to the other side of this. But you know, I
Speaker 2: think one of the things that made me like, I
Speaker 2: like started crying the first time, like I saw you
Speaker 2: dance again and I was like, wow, like what a
Speaker 2: beautiful like she's she's she's dancing and she's moving through
Speaker 2: grief like that, and I think that gives so much
Speaker 2: to other people that are going through the same thing.
Speaker 2: And you're helping more people than you know. And and
Speaker 2: with this book you have coming out keep dancing through
Speaker 2: a boss family groove like you know, it's it's out now,
Speaker 2: people can get it. It's by you and and twitch,
Speaker 2: So when did you guys write it? What's the message
Speaker 2: through it? Because I just love all our listeners to
Speaker 2: know about it, to get the words spread it and
Speaker 2: and yeah, like when did you guys write it? And
Speaker 2: when you know? Is this when it was supposed to
Speaker 2: be released or did you hold it? Like what was
Speaker 2: kind of the whole thing?
Speaker 4: Okay, So we wrote this book back in twenty twenty one,
Speaker 4: and we wrote it because I've always had a dream
Speaker 4: of writing a children's book ever since I had my
Speaker 4: first daughter, Wesley, who's now fifteen. So this has been
Speaker 4: something I've been putting into the ecosystem and manifesting for
Speaker 4: fifteen years. And you know, work gets away from you,
Speaker 4: life gets away from you. And when we had Zia,
Speaker 4: my youngest daughter, who's now four, when we had her,
Speaker 4: I was what a brilliant time to not just you know,
Speaker 4: share our family on social media and continue to these
Speaker 4: TV shows, but really share our family's story and paper,
Speaker 4: you know, in book form, and we wanted to share
Speaker 4: a day in the life of our family. And I
Speaker 4: think it's something that's really special that the God and
Speaker 4: universe really worked with us in our favor, because it's
Speaker 4: a testament to who we were and who we will
Speaker 4: still be as a family. Because truly, honestly, this book,
Speaker 4: it just takes you through a day of our lives.
Speaker 4: And I've always been a really big manifestor I believe
Speaker 4: in affirmations, and I do all these things every single morning.
Speaker 4: And I've been teaching my children this for years. And
Speaker 4: so what the book is is the following the day
Speaker 4: in the life of each of my kids going through
Speaker 4: a struggle, and the words that we use to get
Speaker 4: them out of those struggles, and the things we've been
Speaker 4: teaching them for them to be able to lean on
Speaker 4: each other. And why I tell you all those things
Speaker 4: is because after everything happened to me a year ago,
Speaker 4: there was a lot of discussions if we even wanted
Speaker 4: to launch the book. You know, for me, there was
Speaker 4: moments of maybe I want to hold this book selfishly,
Speaker 4: just for me and the kids, and not let anyone
Speaker 4: else have it, and let it be a book that
Speaker 4: my kids can read and look back on these beautiful
Speaker 4: times and this beautiful memory that we share. Anyways, I
Speaker 4: didn't know if I wanted to hold onto it to
Speaker 4: just be something for us. And then I read the
Speaker 4: book again, and I looked at the messaging and I
Speaker 4: reread the title. All of these things were done. The
Speaker 4: book was written, the illustrations were done, the title was done.
Speaker 4: And I told Disney, I was like, this is all
Speaker 4: I can do is keep dancing through. And this is
Speaker 4: what I'm going to tell my children, and this is
Speaker 4: what Steven would want me to do, and this is
Speaker 4: what I need to do. And if I'm going to
Speaker 4: say anything to anybody that's been following my family's journey
Speaker 4: and supporting my family, and you know, people have been
Speaker 4: following my journey since I was eighteen, of following his
Speaker 4: journey since he was like you know, however, you know
Speaker 4: twenty twenty two when he first doing his shows, and
Speaker 4: they've watched us grow, and they've watched us become a family,
Speaker 4: and they've supported us and they loved us. And if
Speaker 4: I was going to say anything to anyone, I would
Speaker 4: tell them to keep dancing through. And so the reason
Speaker 4: I carried forward to bring this book and actually put
Speaker 4: it back out there in the world for one else
Speaker 4: to be able to share is because I wanted to
Speaker 4: give back and share that we can keep dancing through.
Speaker 4: And that's what I would want, and that's what I
Speaker 4: want to I'm going to do, is what I'm going
Speaker 4: to teach my children to do, and I hope to
Speaker 4: let other people know that it's okay to keep dancing through.
Speaker 4: So it's something that's really really special to my kids
Speaker 4: and something special to me. And I really know that
Speaker 4: Stephen would want this and in honor of him as well.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that message too, especially for people that
Speaker 2: are dealing with grief too, because you know, even our
Speaker 2: friend Kelly who lost her husband, she's like, what's the timeline?
Speaker 2: When can I like be like, it's actually I don't
Speaker 2: want to like look like I'm too HAPPI or like
Speaker 2: can I you know, it's just because I'm still grieving
Speaker 2: and I'll always be grieving. She's like, but no matter what,
Speaker 2: like you just you you dance through it, you get
Speaker 2: through it, and you're showing people that, like you can
Speaker 2: still be both and you can carry both and you
Speaker 2: can do it gracefully, and and yeah, that's that's it's
Speaker 2: it's I can't imagine it, but I love that the
Speaker 2: message that you're putting out there, because I think people
Speaker 2: would maybe feel bad for dancing or being happy, you know,
Speaker 2: or trying or you know what I mean, Like that's.
Speaker 1: Showing to the world that they're happy. Like I remember
Speaker 1: Kelly talking about that. Yeah, you know, people have an
Speaker 1: idea of what the timeline should be, right, but I'm
Speaker 1: showing something other than that.
Speaker 3: Am I not, you know, doing it right or you
Speaker 3: know whatever?
Speaker 2: I do think you I wanted to pull it up
Speaker 2: so that I wasn't miss speaking because I don't have
Speaker 2: my copy with me.
Speaker 3: But I think what was super special.
Speaker 2: I live for kids books, like I love kids books,
Speaker 2: and I think it's so special to be able to
Speaker 2: share your family with my kids, like it's just neat,
Speaker 2: you know, So thank you first of all for taking
Speaker 2: like the leap and going.
Speaker 3: I do want to share.
Speaker 2: This because it is so cool to be a mom
Speaker 2: and be able to like read different life paths with kids.
Speaker 2: You know, what I thought was really neat about it
Speaker 2: that I don't feel like you're not going to probably
Speaker 2: toot your own horn. But there's this like really sweet,
Speaker 2: rhythmic piece of it that is not a normal family
Speaker 2: that I would say is pretty exclusive to like your household.
Speaker 2: From what we have seen of you is just as
Speaker 2: like you know, followers. But there's something like like beboppy
Speaker 2: about the way it's written that I think is really
Speaker 2: special and like pretty unique to your family.
Speaker 3: And I think that is pretty cool. So tell me, does.
Speaker 2: That feel like a little bit of the like curtain
Speaker 2: pulled back to expose that piece of your family? Because
Speaker 2: to me, that's who you guys are. But I've never
Speaker 2: seen that really in a kid's book, I don't think ever.
Speaker 4: For me, that was I'm so happy that you caught
Speaker 4: that because that actually is something that we've been hoping for.
Speaker 4: Music is such a huge part of our family and
Speaker 4: how we live our lives and move through lives. We
Speaker 4: always have music playing and it kind of guides us
Speaker 4: and the emotions and the toll and the energy that
Speaker 4: my house has. And so we really wanted to have
Speaker 4: this rhythmical vibe to the book without it being about music,
Speaker 4: you know, But really having this tone that kind of
Speaker 4: follows a rhythm that it almost feels like while you're
Speaker 4: reading it, you're kind of moving back and forth with it,
Speaker 4: which is why it's you know, I'm strong, I'm smart
Speaker 4: and kind got beats around me too, you know, take
Speaker 4: some deep breaths in and out and all keep dancing
Speaker 4: through it. Kind of we wanted it to feel like
Speaker 4: it had this like motion to it in the words,
Speaker 4: and so I'm glad that you call onto that, but
Speaker 4: it is it's such an important thing for us and
Speaker 4: my kids. I mean, listen my kids their vocabulary when
Speaker 4: it comes to music. As Chef's kiss, it's beautiful, but
Speaker 4: it is true. So thank you for catching that. And
Speaker 4: we've hoped that people would feel that when they read
Speaker 4: the book.
Speaker 3: Well, it's exciting.
Speaker 2: I have a little I'm raising a little beatboxer, So
Speaker 2: that part to him is what's so cool? Is that
Speaker 2: like beat boxy, like you know, the zip zip zip zip,
Speaker 2: like whatever the toothbrushing piece of it is or whatever.
Speaker 2: Like everything to him is a song. So I think
Speaker 2: that's just pretty neat and it's just kind of fun.
Speaker 2: It's like crazy to me to connect on pages the
Speaker 2: music piece of that. We're a music family, so we
Speaker 2: try to keep music around. But I also just love
Speaker 2: silence a lot, So I feel like I'm not as
Speaker 2: jam out.
Speaker 3: As I should be, but it is.
Speaker 2: I just feel like it's really a way, it's a
Speaker 2: very unique way to connect musically from something you're just
Speaker 2: reading and it's not a sing song y, you know,
Speaker 2: Like it's just a really unique way to do that.
Speaker 2: And I just truly appreciate the sharing of that.
Speaker 4: Thank you, thank you. Yeah, you know. For me with
Speaker 4: the book, it's the rhythm. But like the biggest message
Speaker 4: I hope that people realize and take away from the
Speaker 4: book is really the affirmations in it though, you know,
Speaker 4: my children every single morning, my kids, it's really like
Speaker 4: it's my favorite moment with my kids every morning. They
Speaker 4: are by saying I'm strong, I'm smart, I'm own kind,
Speaker 4: Maddox is handsome, And it's just kind of a way
Speaker 4: for us to connect. And I think it's good to
Speaker 4: instill in children confidence, encourage and talking kindly to themselves,
Speaker 4: because you talk to yourself more than anybody else's right,
Speaker 4: Like we have such inner dialogue with ourselves, you know.
Speaker 4: All the time. I'm trying to teach my children that
Speaker 4: you have to speak kindly to yourself because you can't
Speaker 4: rely on happiness from someone else. You can't rely on
Speaker 4: this from someone else. You have to do it for yourself.
Speaker 4: So I'm just trying to encourage you know, being nice
Speaker 4: and speaking highly of yourself and encouraging yourself and lifting
Speaker 4: your spirits yourself and being your your own advocate in life.
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, because the world's going to beat you
Speaker 2: down and tell you that you're not and you have
Speaker 2: to be strong enough to know, okay, you know all
Speaker 2: the things that we're affirming and having our kids affirm
Speaker 2: to themselves that they're like, no, actually, I don't care
Speaker 2: that you don't like me and you're being and like,
Speaker 2: I know, I'm uwesome because since seven years old, my
Speaker 2: mom's were saying I'm enough, I'm brave, because like Jolie
Speaker 2: has in her room too, she's like, I'm brave, I'm beautiful,
Speaker 2: I'm strong, I'm kind She's like, and I am Jolie Ray.
Speaker 2: And there's a few more things like I'm enough and
Speaker 2: m every day I'm like there you go, baby, like
Speaker 2: say say it all you know so And because I don't,
Speaker 2: I don't think I got that as a kid, I
Speaker 2: was gonna ask so yeah. So I'm like to me,
Speaker 2: I'm like, I need her to know because it's like
Speaker 2: she's I don't know. This is probably awful to say,
Speaker 2: like and probably a therapist be like, that's really bad.
Speaker 2: But sometimes I look at her like, what, what did
Speaker 2: my little child? Like? She's like my almost little child,
Speaker 2: like that one that was hurt inside me. So I'm like,
Speaker 2: I gotta love her and protect her and like, you know,
Speaker 2: make sure I choose my words carefully, like what would
Speaker 2: I want as my little girl that was injured or
Speaker 2: that was wounded?
Speaker 1: Right, you know, want to hear I think we all
Speaker 1: have to do that because she didn't get Yeah.
Speaker 2: Does that is it feel like something you're passing down
Speaker 2: because you had that, or is it feel like something
Speaker 2: you wish you had more of? And so you're determined
Speaker 2: to kind of like change the narrative of your family
Speaker 2: history from here forward.
Speaker 4: The first time I ever really started playing with affirmations,
Speaker 4: I was twenty years old. It is something that I
Speaker 4: now have been doing for so long in my life,
Speaker 4: and I attest to the way I live my life
Speaker 4: through this. I do it every single morning. Every single morning,
Speaker 4: I start my day by getting ready, do my hair
Speaker 4: and makeup, and I'm talking to myself and I probably
Speaker 4: sound like a crazy hum but I'm going through all
Speaker 4: my affirmations and I'm doing it and it's meant so
Speaker 4: much to me, and it's changed my life and it's
Speaker 4: helped me through so many hard times in my life.
Speaker 4: So for me, I wanted to teach it to my
Speaker 4: kids at an earlier age so they, you know, can
Speaker 4: get through the hardest times of their life through it
Speaker 4: and with it as well. But I've been doing it
Speaker 4: for a really, really long time, and I have such
Speaker 4: a plethora and different arrangement of types of affirmations and
Speaker 4: manifestations that I say and do. The newest one with
Speaker 4: my kids that I do, though, which is, oh, it's
Speaker 4: my favorite, is I say we do the and they
Speaker 4: finish it out by saying the hard things. And I
Speaker 4: do that one because I cold plunge every morning and
Speaker 4: it's quite literally one of the hardest things I do.
Speaker 2: That's a miserable pandas and I'm like, nope, no, no.
Speaker 2: I think as we were raised in Michigan, we feel
Speaker 2: like we filled our quota, so we.
Speaker 3: Don't have to do those things anymore. Yeah, we're like, no,
Speaker 3: actually not charming.
Speaker 4: But it's it's something that I really believe in and
Speaker 4: I've seen the benefits of it, and it's well, I've
Speaker 4: been having this really hard year. I think it's a
Speaker 4: really big thing that I do it, and I'm it's
Speaker 4: been really helpful for my children as well.
Speaker 2: That's one thing I really want to do. And I
Speaker 2: am not like you just started doing this kind of
Speaker 2: an assignment.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah from Alan? Oh yeah, yeah, and this is silly.
Speaker 3: I'm forty two years old.
Speaker 2: I cannot I want to be able to be I
Speaker 2: want to be able to stand in front of a
Speaker 2: mirror and say those things.
Speaker 3: I'm not a challenge you for a week to do it.
Speaker 3: I'm going to write you what you have to say.
Speaker 3: You to read it. I all want to do it. Well, well, yeah,
Speaker 3: but I do know.
Speaker 2: It changes your frequency, it changes the way you think,
Speaker 2: the way you feel like of course, right, I just
Speaker 2: don't know why I can't get out of my own way.
Speaker 4: But that's the hard part of it, you know, is
Speaker 4: you know it's easy to say things like fleeting, but
Speaker 4: you've got to look yourself in the mirror, like that
Speaker 4: is the biggest part of it that you have to
Speaker 4: do that I sometimes think that people miss is you
Speaker 4: have to be like staring at yourself and seeing yourself
Speaker 4: and saying it to yourself in that way. And it's
Speaker 4: just a game changer, is because it you're seeing yourself,
Speaker 4: You're looking at yourself, you know. And I always say
Speaker 4: too that. I think it's also the discipline of doing it.
Speaker 4: And I know that sounds wild and like, well, you know,
Speaker 4: you're just talking and blah blah blah. But I've done
Speaker 4: it every single morning I was twenty and I'm now
Speaker 4: thirty five, and I do not I do not let
Speaker 4: it get away from me. It's I do it every
Speaker 4: single morning. So it's like the discipline and the habit
Speaker 4: of it and the act of it that's really gone
Speaker 4: me through.
Speaker 2: Love that well, Allison, thank you for coming on. Everyone
Speaker 2: get keep dancing through a Boss Family Groove by Allison
Speaker 2: Boss and Twitch. So thank you so much, appreciate you
Speaker 2: coming on.
Speaker 4: Thank you guys, Thank you, glad to be okay, Bye
Speaker 4: you guys.
Speaker 3: Bye.
Speaker 2: If I was here, I would start my mornings with
Speaker 2: like a boss. Like a boss, go get them girl,
Speaker 2: like a oos. Guys, that was a good episode. I'm
Speaker 2: gonna just scratch away.
Speaker 3: Scratch that we come up with an answer. Scratch that.
Speaker 3: Oh that's another one has the answer for us.
Speaker 2: So I wanted to do this on Instagram, but I
Speaker 2: didn't want we kind to get a sponsorship somewhere. What
Speaker 2: this is like a very head and shoulders moment, but
Speaker 2: it's not know but do you okay? So weather has
Speaker 2: to be a because it's a friend.
Speaker 3: I'm not dry. I'm not dry. I'm not I mean,
Speaker 3: i'm dry, but my head's not like I don't know, girl,
Speaker 3: it's weird, but apparently it's not common. And please, if
Speaker 3: you have like lines, show up, let me know. I'll
Speaker 3: look at it and see. Oh my god, I can't. Okay,
Speaker 3: we got all. We're gonna stop.
Speaker 2: Okay, have a great night or day