Speaker 1: Cutbooms.
Speaker 2: If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
Speaker 2: a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
Speaker 2: of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He
Speaker 2: treats crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the
Speaker 2: rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to the clearing
Speaker 2: House of hot takes, break free for something special. The
Speaker 2: Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
Speaker 1: In the A Everywhere The Fifth Hour with Ben Mahler
Speaker 1: and Danny g Radio And welcome to a Saturday, Saturday
Speaker 1: Saturday as we hang out together, you and I and
Speaker 1: we're together on this Danny all weekend long as we
Speaker 1: cut down the time. And a lot of people listen
Speaker 1: to this while they're they're doing that Honeydee List on Saturday.
Speaker 1: Gotta get up early, take care of the honeydew list.
Speaker 3: I one of the Nagy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, a lot of guys have to deal with that crap.
Speaker 1: But it's also if you're a nerd, it's May the
Speaker 1: Fourth be with You day today. So all right, now,
Speaker 1: you're not a Star Wars guy, right, but no, I
Speaker 1: like stars. My mom took me out of school when
Speaker 1: I was a kid. For the first couple of Star
Speaker 1: Wars movies, like we got online. It was like a
Speaker 1: big deal. You know, we ditched school, like you're not
Speaker 1: schools to do that. I remember that more than just
Speaker 1: a random Wednesday or Thursday at school or whatever. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I like the original three. I believe it's been watered down.
Speaker 1: It's my take on that, like there's been too many
Speaker 1: of them and all that. But yeah I can. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I get down with Job of the Hut literally man party.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was a big, big event as a kid
Speaker 3: when a Star Wars movie would come out. I remember
Speaker 3: when Return of the Jedi came out in the theater
Speaker 3: and we stood in line as kids to get in
Speaker 3: to see that movie. And you know, my parents. I
Speaker 3: remember my mom and stepdad and aunt and cousins. Everybody
Speaker 3: had so much fun watching that movie at the theater.
Speaker 3: And then as soon as the theater let out, everybody
Speaker 3: in the family started fighting again.
Speaker 1: But for those two and a half hours.
Speaker 3: It was peace and harmony.
Speaker 1: You were really into it. Yeah, I got the first
Speaker 1: Star Wars came out in nineteen seventy seven. I did
Speaker 1: not get online for that, but the other two, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we were a little too.
Speaker 3: We were a little too young for that one, barely born. Yeah,
Speaker 3: but yeah, but Empire strikes back. I remember Empire strikes
Speaker 3: Back at the drive in as a little small kid.
Speaker 3: And then, like I said, we got to go to
Speaker 3: a walk in theater as we called it way in
Speaker 3: the olden days to see Return of the Jedi. And
Speaker 3: Return of the Jedi might be my favorite just because
Speaker 3: of that memory. Yeah, I have like the smell of popcorn.
Speaker 3: I mean, not that we got any, but my mom
Speaker 3: busted out the little plastic bags she pre made the
Speaker 3: popcorn and threw some Eminem's in there and said, shut up,
Speaker 3: here's your candy and popcorn. Yeah, she had the contraband
Speaker 3: in her purse, and.
Speaker 1: We would always sneak the candy in. My mom always
Speaker 1: had a really big purse, so we'd go to get
Speaker 1: the candy because they gouge you at the movies. But
Speaker 1: we were always concerned. As a kid. I thought, oh
Speaker 1: my god, my mom's going to get arrested and she's
Speaker 1: got some peanut m and ms in her purse, and
Speaker 1: my mom to go to jail for me because I'm
Speaker 1: a fat kid. And she never did get arrested.
Speaker 3: Could you imagine TSA at the door of the movie theater.
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, hold of us. You couldnot take those
Speaker 1: milk drops.
Speaker 3: Us, so many of us would have criminal records.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Now, if you're really into Star Wars and I
Speaker 1: don't know anyone that's done this, I've heard that people
Speaker 1: do do this. That when they filmed the Star Wars
Speaker 1: movies out in the desert, Tunisian desert, they just left
Speaker 1: the set out in the middle of the dead. The
Speaker 1: iconic you know, iconic scenes and Star Wars they left
Speaker 1: them out in the middle of nowhere, and people go
Speaker 1: on trips to go see where they filmed the movie there.
Speaker 1: They're actually Tunisian tourism with people that went there or
Speaker 1: go there to walk where they filmed the movies.
Speaker 3: For some I was gonna say, for some of the
Speaker 3: scenes on the Central Coast ben one of the parts
Speaker 3: of California, you and I both really like. It's the
Speaker 3: sand dunes there right before you get to Pismo Beach
Speaker 3: they filmed. Yeah, there's rolling sand dunes, really, and they
Speaker 3: filmed some Star Wars scenes there.
Speaker 1: I didn't I did not know that Gua Guadaloupe is
Speaker 1: the name of it. I do know the e walk
Speaker 1: looks like a looks like my old dog Bella. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, I know that, but maybe George Lucas liked
Speaker 1: that kind of that kind of dog. But yeah, that's
Speaker 1: it's kind of I mean, if you're into it, why not.
Speaker 1: I saw photos. It looks like a lot of the stuff.
Speaker 1: It's been a long time since they filmed that, and
Speaker 1: it's it's not doing that well. It's been out in
Speaker 1: the desert sun for forty years or fifty years or
Speaker 1: whatever it is, so it's not doing particularly great. But
Speaker 1: you can certainly see if they do the side by
Speaker 1: side on the internet if you click on some of
Speaker 1: the sites, they have the side by side of what
Speaker 1: it looked like on the film and what it looks
Speaker 1: like now, and like, hey here I am the Force awakens.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm here.
Speaker 3: Man.
Speaker 1: It's a lot of money to go on vacation for
Speaker 1: that kind of thing. But yeah, if you're into that.
Speaker 1: I know today in modern times, a lot of baseball
Speaker 1: teams they always have that as a promotion so they
Speaker 1: can get people to spend a little extra to get
Speaker 1: a star Wars the Insured or something like that. It's
Speaker 1: free comic book day today. You're into that kind of thing.
Speaker 1: My dad was a big comic book guy in his day,
Speaker 1: loved the comic books. It's beer pong day, so enjoy that.
Speaker 1: Why would today be beer punk? That seems kind of
Speaker 1: random day.
Speaker 3: I guess a warm up for Sinko Demayo.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, maybe maybe that's maybe that's its International fire
Speaker 1: Fighter Day, So congratulations.
Speaker 3: What's up firefighters listening?
Speaker 1: Yeah, and there's some big horse race there in the
Speaker 1: most exciting two minutes in sports. We talked about that yesterday,
Speaker 1: but today's the actual day and it shares it shares
Speaker 1: the big day with the National Candied Orange Peel Day,
Speaker 1: which is a very important day. There's so many stupid holidays,
Speaker 1: but I love about that all right.
Speaker 3: That horse race is over before you could finish, peeling pretty.
Speaker 1: Much close, but no cigar. It was my last weekend
Speaker 1: birthday weekend, and here people were wondering, what were you doing?
Speaker 1: You didn't talk about the show. Welcome to the forty club,
Speaker 1: by the way, Yeah, I just just crossed over forty.
Speaker 1: So originally was going to go to Sequoia. I've done
Speaker 1: that in the past for my birthday, the Giant Forest. However,
Speaker 1: to get to Sequoia from the north Woods where I
Speaker 1: hang out. It is a long winding road, long winding
Speaker 1: road to reach the redwoods, of those big redwoods. Plus
Speaker 1: I was just in a big forest when I was
Speaker 1: in Northern California and Los Gatos. So I feel like
Speaker 1: I love the I think the giant force is better.
Speaker 1: I believe it is. I don't think that's up for debate.
Speaker 1: It's a better forest than the one I was in,
Speaker 1: but the one I was in was close. We also
Speaker 1: have a big trip coming up across country, trip that
Speaker 1: we've talked a little bit about. I'll promote that more.
Speaker 3: In a second.
Speaker 1: So I decide, you know what, I'm going to go
Speaker 1: back to my old snopping grounds in San Diego where
Speaker 1: it all began, where my radio dreams began on the
Speaker 1: mighty six ninety. They're off SeaWorld Drive and Pacific Coast
Speaker 1: Highway and San Diego, and go back and just hang out,
Speaker 1: walk around a little bit, go to Balbo, Paul, check
Speaker 1: out a museum, have a nice meal, and then boom,
Speaker 1: that's it. So we pack up the malamobile, hop in
Speaker 1: the car and we're going do Do Do Do Do
Speaker 1: Do Do, And all of a sudden. We get to
Speaker 1: about Santa No Free and nothing but red lights.
Speaker 3: In front of us, son of a biscuit.
Speaker 1: Bumper to bumper to bumper to bumper. So we're looking
Speaker 1: at the the GPS. We're like, okay, maybe it's just
Speaker 1: a little bit of traffic.
Speaker 3: And the ways app said time in traffic, twenty nine minutes.
Speaker 1: This is the fastest route. Though It's like, but no,
Speaker 1: it was a lot more than twenty nine minutes.
Speaker 3: And so I made these Oh she only tells you
Speaker 3: that for the standstill time though.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, So traffic starts piling up around Camp Pendleton.
Speaker 1: If you're familiar with.
Speaker 3: The oh yeah, yeah, what a crappy drive.
Speaker 1: So I called an audible and I said, oh maha,
Speaker 1: oh maha, oh maha, just like oh my and I
Speaker 1: pivoted and we decided to have instead of going to
Speaker 1: San Diego and having a wonderful time in that great place,
Speaker 1: we just had a little beachside a bungalow in Orange County.
Speaker 3: We drove.
Speaker 1: I got off right at Santaofrey. The tits were there
Speaker 1: from the famous movie what was that naked gun? Yes,
Speaker 1: famous scene and naked gun.
Speaker 3: Your old tech producer big brother Jake. Whenever he drives
Speaker 3: past that, he tweets out the same joke every time.
Speaker 1: It's a great joke. It's a great dad joke.
Speaker 3: Here's the boobs. Stay awake with Jake.
Speaker 1: So I got off the freeway and I thought, well,
Speaker 1: I've never been to the beach at Santaofrey. I hear
Speaker 1: they have wonderful surf, and not that I'm a surfer.
Speaker 1: I just thought, well, we're here. I didn't plan on
Speaker 1: coming here. I don't know that I'll ever be here again.
Speaker 2: Jase dows cool buzz, and I'm fine.
Speaker 1: So we're right near a nuclear power plant. Why don't
Speaker 1: we go check out the beach. So we get off
Speaker 1: the freeway, turn right, make a left, go down this
Speaker 1: two lane road. We can see the nuclear reactor. There's
Speaker 1: signs warning you are entering a federal nuclear power plant
Speaker 1: zone and all this crap. But they did have a
Speaker 1: sign towards the beach, so okay, we'll go to the beach.
Speaker 1: Who cares. And they haven't used that nuclear reactor in years, right,
Speaker 1: that's been things been dormant, although they still have. Obviously,
Speaker 1: you never really dormant when you have the nuclear power.
Speaker 4: I would have thought a nuclear reactor would be too complicated.
Speaker 3: It's not active. There's spaceships that they park in there.
Speaker 3: Probably so probably. So. So we go to the to.
Speaker 1: The beach and there's a big sign beach access only
Speaker 1: available if you are serving at Camp Pendleton active duty,
Speaker 1: or if you have a pass. Well, I'm not in
Speaker 1: the military. I don't I'm not working at Camp Poundton.
Speaker 1: I didn't have a pass. So we had to get
Speaker 1: out of it. We were not allowed to go to
Speaker 1: that beach. That was an elitist beach. I didn't know
Speaker 1: you could do that, but they did, and so we
Speaker 1: made a U turn. We then go down the other direction,
Speaker 1: down the two lane road. We go down a side road.
Speaker 1: I didn't know where this was leading us, but we
Speaker 1: went down. We went under Interstate five, and then we
Speaker 1: popped up and lo and behold there was an entrance
Speaker 1: which I had never known existed. And I've been going
Speaker 1: to San Diego for many, many years just to work there.
Speaker 1: There's an interest to Camp Pendleton, right across from Santa
Speaker 1: and Nov. I had no idea. I didn't even know
Speaker 1: that was a thing, but it was. It's right there.
Speaker 1: So anyway, we didn't we didn't go in the base,
Speaker 1: but we just kind of drove around all the beach
Speaker 1: towns in South Warent County data Point San Clemente, went
Speaker 1: up to Laguna Beach, Newport, had a nice lunch and
Speaker 1: it was fine. It was good, probably like San Diego
Speaker 1: a little more. But I didn't want to spend two
Speaker 1: and a half hours in traffic to go to San Diego.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I'm good. I'm good on that.
Speaker 3: That's why none of us here in the Los Angeles
Speaker 3: area and even further into the woods, like you can
Speaker 3: visit San Diego. My girl and I we've been wanting
Speaker 3: to go there for like a year right now, and
Speaker 3: it's probably been a year and a half to two
Speaker 3: years since we've been to San Diego. And that's exactly
Speaker 3: the reason why, because we need to put aside an
Speaker 3: entire day just to sit on our asses inside the car.
Speaker 1: Logistically, it doesn't seem to make a lot of sense
Speaker 1: to me. And here's why. It's not like it's a
Speaker 1: three lane or two lane road from La to San Diego.
Speaker 1: It's four or five lanes at that area. And the
Speaker 1: way it works is on one side, you have the ocean.
Speaker 1: On the other side you have Camp Pendleton for about
Speaker 1: what ten miles or something like that. It's a big
Speaker 1: stretch of land. But it's like there's enough lanes, just
Speaker 1: there's so many people. It doesn't matter how many lanes
Speaker 1: they have. And I think also you have a bottleneck
Speaker 1: at the end of Camp Pendleton right where it gets
Speaker 1: a little smaller. Yeah, which is that's the problem.
Speaker 3: It gets a little smaller. Yeah, But but I think
Speaker 3: by like one lane though. That's why I always scratch
Speaker 3: my head, like I yeah, I guess when they planned
Speaker 3: that and they built it, it needed to be like
Speaker 3: three lanes larger. It needed to look like something they
Speaker 3: built in Chicago.
Speaker 1: Oh they sandwich everything on top of each other and all.
Speaker 3: Well yeah, or you know, spread it out to make
Speaker 3: it ten lanes wide.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, good luck on that.
Speaker 3: It's never going to happen in our lifetime.
Speaker 1: They spend their money to hand it out to I
Speaker 1: guess homeless so they can get more homeless.
Speaker 3: Or you and your wife should jump on the Amtrak
Speaker 3: train next time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we could do that. That's actually not a bad idea.
Speaker 1: That's a smooth way to get down there. We actually
Speaker 1: stopped at the beach, the famous beach. I think it's
Speaker 1: in San Clemente where the tracks go right.
Speaker 3: Through the back. Oh that is San Clemente.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, pretty cool, pretty cool. They have like
Speaker 1: a little pier and the train tracks literally go right
Speaker 1: through the beach area. In fact, they have a sign
Speaker 1: because it gives a lot of people decide they want
Speaker 1: to check out. And they have a National suicide Prevention
Speaker 1: thing right there because I guess people have decided lights
Speaker 1: out there. But it's a nice little beach. We had
Speaker 1: an interesting night on the show. We had a couple
Speaker 1: interesting things we can bring up here. So Jerome and
Speaker 1: Charleston called up. If you heard the show the other night,
Speaker 1: he is trying to shake me down. I'm doing a
Speaker 1: mallor meet and greet. I don't know if you know
Speaker 1: this English pub in Charleston, South Carolina. My man Dale
Speaker 1: yep Dale hooked us up.
Speaker 3: Mother's side burn.
Speaker 1: No no, no, no, no bad Jobby. My Father's must Day, My
Speaker 1: Father's must Day and the James Island location will be
Speaker 1: there three to five this coming Friday, three to five, Charleston,
Speaker 1: South Carolina. Be there a couple hours. I might stay longer,
Speaker 1: might stay longer. Try to get there a little earlier,
Speaker 1: but three to five will be hanging out having a
Speaker 1: good time at that English pub. So Jerome calls us up.
Speaker 1: He's one of the handful of callers we have from Charles,
Speaker 1: So surely Jerome would show up to the malarmeing greet
Speaker 1: and I say, hey, you're gonna be there. I'm trying
Speaker 1: to figure it out, man, I gotta do the math.
Speaker 1: He was complaining, Yeah, exactly. So he's complaining about the cost.
Speaker 1: He said, I don't have a car. I gotta take uber.
Speaker 1: It's expensive and I'm gonna fixed income and all this stuff.
Speaker 1: So he shakes me down. It's gonna end up Danny
Speaker 1: costing me money. I'm not getting paid to do this.
Speaker 1: I'm doing this on my own and Dale's helping me out.
Speaker 1: And I thank Dale for that and the people at
Speaker 1: the restaurant, but I'm not getting paid to make an appearance.
Speaker 1: I'm doing this on my own own time.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Plus all those free drinks you gotta buy for
Speaker 3: the Confederate flags.
Speaker 1: Well that's when I would see Jerome is like hey,
Speaker 1: He's like, I don't know, and I said, okay, fine,
Speaker 1: so I'm gonna I offered to buy him an appetizer
Speaker 1: and a drink out of my own wallet.
Speaker 3: What.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a government handout. Man, it's not a paid
Speaker 1: p but it's gonna cost me money now, man, just
Speaker 1: for visiting the electorate there.
Speaker 3: That is super Arnold Schwartzenegger of you don't let any
Speaker 3: kid go hungry.
Speaker 1: Pressing the flesh on my whistle stop tour through Dixie
Speaker 1: if I even make it there. Because a follow up,
Speaker 1: a follow up Danny DMV license drama O rama. Now
Speaker 1: you might remember I passed my test one take malor
Speaker 1: got my driver's license approved, giving a temporary license.
Speaker 3: Then you ran into the restroom there and slicked your
Speaker 3: hair back.
Speaker 1: But as of the taping of this podcast, I have
Speaker 1: yet to receive something very important in the mail and
Speaker 1: in my head that that classic Elvis Presley tune returned
Speaker 1: to center address unknown. You know, no such person, no
Speaker 1: such zone. That's playing in my head because I'm worried
Speaker 1: that I will fall victim to the bureaucracy of government.
Speaker 1: Will my license make it in time? Yeah, today's the
Speaker 1: last day. If I don't get my license, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: have to go to the airport without my license and
Speaker 1: try to board a domestic flight from the West Coast
Speaker 1: to the East coast, and will I make it. One
Speaker 1: of my radio friends says that I will be in
Speaker 1: a whole lot of trouble if I show up at
Speaker 1: the airport without my driver's license. But I have read
Speaker 1: online that you can do it, but just be prepared
Speaker 1: to have every orifice search. So I have people put
Speaker 1: hands up your ass and all that, and you'll be
Speaker 1: good to go.
Speaker 3: A lot of red tape. It's like the puppet you
Speaker 3: and your wife bought in Vegas.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, the Muppet, the Muppet, Yeah, Muppet, Yeah,
Speaker 1: hand up the butt. Well, this will be not if
Speaker 1: this does happen. It's not the first time. I was
Speaker 1: stopped in Virginia Beach by the TSA famously and was
Speaker 1: read the Riot Act by TSA and almost missed my
Speaker 1: flight because of some confusion.
Speaker 3: And they were.
Speaker 1: Complaining about this, that and the other thing.
Speaker 3: And yeah, the white powder turned out to be powder
Speaker 3: from a donut you had that morning.
Speaker 1: How am I to know? How am I to know
Speaker 1: at all? You know, maybe instead of flying, I'll just
Speaker 1: get on a speeding locomotive. Maybe that's what.
Speaker 3: Well, I'm telling you that Amtrak, it's not a speeding locomotive,
Speaker 3: but close enough. Yeah, if we ever go back to
Speaker 3: San Diego, it's probably gonna be that Amtrak train.
Speaker 1: Now, are you gonna you take the train to San Diego?
Speaker 1: But then you've got to go if you're gonna go
Speaker 1: to Bow How much of the uber ride to Boubo?
Speaker 1: I guess they have the They do have public transfer.
Speaker 3: They do. Yeah, it's probably dirty now, but like everything else. Yeah,
Speaker 3: or I think it stops in old town San Diego.
Speaker 3: Take a donkey ride to your hotel. A couple of
Speaker 3: asses on asses every wonderful. But we have a speeding
Speaker 3: train inside our living room right now. Ben. Last weekend
Speaker 3: it was a child proofing Saturday and Sunday on Amazon.
Speaker 3: I ordered those plastic things that go into the outlet.
Speaker 3: Very important. Yeah, that way little baby CoA doesn't or
Speaker 3: big baby co as it is exactly. Yeah, he already
Speaker 3: has a little mohawk, so I don't want that to
Speaker 3: stand up any further with a sizzle. So put those
Speaker 3: into the power outlets in the living room and the
Speaker 3: family room, all right, And then had to get those
Speaker 3: little kind of like rubber corner tips to put on
Speaker 3: furniture and chairs. The bottom of chairs. You know what
Speaker 3: I'm talking about. They stick on to corners.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you take an eye out.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's made out of that material, almost like
Speaker 3: a pencil grip. Okay, that you stick on to the
Speaker 3: corners that way. If he falls right now and hits
Speaker 3: his head, it's only a deep bruise rather than an
Speaker 3: actual gash with blood squirting out.
Speaker 1: Well. And the good thing too, Danny is that little
Speaker 1: baby cole when he's older. He can use that when
Speaker 1: you get old, and then you can you know, you
Speaker 1: don't hit a corner.
Speaker 3: So full circle. Yeah, I hope he doesn't have to
Speaker 3: deal with a diaper blowout from me the way I
Speaker 3: have with him.
Speaker 1: It'll be much messier for you for him if you yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah. So now he has gone ben from barely learning
Speaker 3: how to crawl a few weeks ago to now full
Speaker 3: on locomotive train status. He in a blink of the eye,
Speaker 3: he is from one room to the next. He's into everything.
Speaker 3: He's pulling himself up and standing up. So he wants
Speaker 3: to already advance to walking. This crawling thing, it just
Speaker 3: gets him from point A to point B, almost like
Speaker 3: a beater car.
Speaker 1: Change the world here, Yeah, ready to Yeah.
Speaker 3: The beater car. The beater car is him crawling right now.
Speaker 3: The destination where he really wants to go is on
Speaker 3: his feet, because he keeps pulling himself up. The problem
Speaker 3: with that is Bam either falls back on the back
Speaker 3: of his head or falls frontward and does a face plant.
Speaker 3: So he's all over the place. Man, he's jamming my wife.
Speaker 3: He did something. I don't know how I feel about this,
Speaker 3: and maybe it's old school thinking and I shouldn't have
Speaker 3: the memory of it that I have. But she ordered
Speaker 3: on Amazon a helmet for him to wear. Why do
Speaker 3: you have to wear a helmet? Oh, like he's a
Speaker 3: crash test dumb boy.
Speaker 1: Helmet.
Speaker 3: No, Yeah, I'm gonna do I'm calling up my text
Speaker 3: right now. There's actually a pretty cool picture of him
Speaker 3: minus the helmet, the special kid helmet. Yeah, but that's
Speaker 3: what I think of. You know, you remember there were
Speaker 3: kids who had seizures and so on your cool bus.
Speaker 3: They would have to wear a helmet.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Sure, and of course they got teased endlessly for having
Speaker 3: a helmet. Yeah. So I cannot look at my son
Speaker 3: right now. I was a good looking kid, but I
Speaker 3: can't help but look at him. And laugh because he's
Speaker 3: wearing this stupid helmet. Make sure you're about to receive
Speaker 3: It's not going to be Co's headshot for Hollywood.
Speaker 1: Okay, let's see here.
Speaker 3: Doo doo, doom, Doom, doom, doom in the modern world, doom,
Speaker 3: little sinkle domo trivia while we wait for the phone
Speaker 3: system to work. What country's army did the smaller, much
Speaker 3: smaller Mexican army slay. And that's why they celebrate Sinco Tomayo.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go France.
Speaker 3: Yes, you go in some tequila?
Speaker 1: Yeah, what about some guac? I didn't even like wak
Speaker 1: expensive guak, some guak ex Yeah you go. Oh you
Speaker 1: know what they call Sinco to my own Mexico.
Speaker 3: Danny the fifth of May.
Speaker 1: That's right, that's what they call the fifth of a.
Speaker 1: It's just another day. It's no big deal. You stupid, you, stupid.
Speaker 3: Gringos America excuse for Caucasians to drink.
Speaker 1: Yes, just like we need that. I'm still it still
Speaker 1: didn't hold hold se Oh wow, look at that. That's
Speaker 1: a good looking kid right there all right now, Now, Co,
Speaker 1: he has your eyes, by the way he does.
Speaker 3: Now, CO, forgive me, I will share this with our
Speaker 3: fifth hour audience. I'll go ahead and post this at
Speaker 3: Danny G Radio. Yeah, but now, and you'll.
Speaker 1: Looks like an old school NFL player before they put
Speaker 1: face mass on. He's got the letter. He's playing for
Speaker 1: a Dinosaur team. So what you're looking at, man, come on,
Speaker 1: it looks like you dove in the end zone. He's
Speaker 1: looking up after he hit the ground. He's like, well,
Speaker 1: look at me. I just scored a touchdown.
Speaker 3: He crawled right into a corner and hit his forehead
Speaker 3: on it. So he had a nice protruding bruise on
Speaker 3: his forehead and then he faced planet and got this
Speaker 3: big carpet burn on it.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I see it. Yeah, he's got to burn. Yeah.
Speaker 3: And then when I was on Dad patrol, he fell
Speaker 3: backwards and hit the back of his head. It made
Speaker 3: a boom inside our place, and Demolition derby with his he's.
Speaker 1: Going for it.
Speaker 3: Yeah. His mom came running down the stairs. I heard that,
Speaker 3: and so I think that was that was it. That
Speaker 3: that's what made her order the little helmet from Ama saw.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, better safe than sorry. Yeah. It was in
Speaker 1: the thing about kids. You have to do every mistake
Speaker 1: to learn not to do the mistake, right, you just
Speaker 1: trial and error. You gotta hit your head a million times.
Speaker 1: That's why the whole concussion thing. I don't want to
Speaker 1: get on a tangent, but here I'm gonna get all
Speaker 1: on a tangent. But it's like the concussion thing. You know,
Speaker 1: how many concussions kids like we have had, Like we
Speaker 1: had when we were kids growing up, you didn't know
Speaker 1: about it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's funny you mentioned that because when he hit
Speaker 3: the back of his head like that, I thought to myself,
Speaker 3: that has to be a small concussion that he just
Speaker 3: got from that. There's no way you can hit your
Speaker 3: head that hard and not have any repercussions with a concussion. Yeah, man,
Speaker 3: So you're damn right. You're so right about that. I
Speaker 3: feel like in a child's little lifetime, they've probably had
Speaker 3: three good concussions growing up.
Speaker 1: Well, and you know it's bad now, but when you
Speaker 1: know back in our day, daddy, you know you're around
Speaker 1: our age, the playgrounds with that were not designed for safety.
Speaker 3: You know, where it just was, you have, everything was
Speaker 3: made out of rusted steel.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, and you'd go in the summer, you know,
Speaker 1: one hundred and ninety degrees to go on the swings
Speaker 1: and your ass burned up. You couldn't touch the sides
Speaker 1: of it. Did metal chains, There was that. I mean
Speaker 1: there were traps they built as playgrounds.
Speaker 3: For kids, are spiked bicycle pedals.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah. So it's a little better now now in
Speaker 1: most of the playgrounds they have those little rubber pieces,
Speaker 1: like the tire pieces or whatever.
Speaker 3: So also the lazy ass adults back then, they didn't
Speaker 3: believe in that nice what is that stuff? It's almost
Speaker 3: like an expensive safe rubber that they put down on
Speaker 3: the play structures. When we were little kids, they laid
Speaker 3: down rocks and the stupid wood chips.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that was always a yeah, it's always a
Speaker 1: good thing.
Speaker 3: Oh Michael, you'd get splinters all the time. Yeah.
Speaker 1: There are photos of there's some Instagram posts that I've
Speaker 1: seen of the playgrounds, like from the eighties, in the nineties,
Speaker 1: early nineties, but eighties and late seventies, and it's just
Speaker 1: it's wow. It's like this is some kind of thing
Speaker 1: you'd get out of North Korea, like Pyongyang or something,
Speaker 1: or you know, Russia, and it's like, no, that was America.
Speaker 1: That's how we operated in America. Well, callersday, the darnedest things.
Speaker 1: I had some really funny moments on the Overnight Show
Speaker 1: this week that I would like to highlight here, and
Speaker 1: we have a toss up. I'm gonna let you decide.
Speaker 1: You make the call, you listening make the call, and
Speaker 1: Danny g you make the call. We've got keg drinking
Speaker 1: Steve from Missouri who called up to do a victory lap,
Speaker 1: a celebratory call, as Alfy Alien, Opiner and Ferg Dog
Speaker 1: would say. It was a celebratory call about the Chiefs
Speaker 1: winning the first round of the NFL Draft. You might
Speaker 1: remember that Kansas City made a trade with Buffalo and
Speaker 1: they got a speedy wide receiver. So if you didn't
Speaker 1: hear the call, perhaps not the first thing here. Steve
Speaker 1: was oozing Bruce Ki's in Bourbon as he called up.
Speaker 1: He's keg drinking Steve after all. And when he finally
Speaker 1: took a breath as he was celebrating the Chiefs dynasties
Speaker 1: going on and on, I asked him a question which
Speaker 1: turned out to be the hardest question that he had
Speaker 1: ever been asked. A real mind bender. I said, Hey, Steve,
Speaker 1: can you name the player the Chiefs drafted they traded
Speaker 1: up the draft and he hemmed any hawd he tapp dance?
Speaker 1: You would have thought I asked him to reverse engineer
Speaker 1: an alien spacecraft.
Speaker 3: Ah.
Speaker 1: Man, he had no idea who Xavier Worthy was.
Speaker 3: He should have just pulled a Dick and Dayton and
Speaker 3: changed the subject.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that would have been the move. But so he
Speaker 1: that was unbelievable. It was great absurd absurdity ensued. And
Speaker 1: then how do you do? Then we say hello to
Speaker 1: the other half of this? You make the call. Mark
Speaker 1: in Denver called up Mark and Denver big fan of
Speaker 1: the show. He wanted to play one of our games,
Speaker 1: Malar'smount of Money. So what normally happens is I will
Speaker 1: introduce the contestants, I will set the game up, then
Speaker 1: we will have a brief intermission, and then we will.
Speaker 3: Have the game.
Speaker 1: So we put Mark on, we put the other guy on.
Speaker 1: I introduced both of them. We got to know that
Speaker 1: a little bit, okay. I said, you just stay right
Speaker 1: there on hold, I'll come right back to you and
Speaker 1: we'll play the game.
Speaker 3: And just good to go.
Speaker 1: So we went back. After we paused for the cause,
Speaker 1: went back, picked the phone, call up. Mark said, hey Mark.
Speaker 1: He did not hang up. He was there, although he
Speaker 1: was not paying attention. He was listening. Now, what do
Speaker 1: you think he was listening to?
Speaker 3: Danny?
Speaker 1: What do you think Mark was listening to?
Speaker 3: Mark in Denver, to George Norri, George Norrie.
Speaker 1: Okay, that would have been fine. We love George, big
Speaker 1: fan of George Norri does does wonderful Radio. No, Mark
Speaker 1: was listening to the Best of Ben Maler Show podcast
Speaker 1: while on the original Recipe podcast, which it was. The
Speaker 1: timing on this, Danny was perfect. You might have had
Speaker 1: to have been there or just heard it, because I'm like, hey,
Speaker 1: are you are you Mark? Are you there? And then
Speaker 1: we here in the background the fifth you know, the
Speaker 1: Ben Maler Show, Best of Ben Maler Show podcast, Like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, it was unbelievable.
Speaker 3: So he's the one who downloads that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's the only one. It was a wacky tobaccy.
Speaker 1: So which one, Danny you make the call? Which is
Speaker 1: the crazier call? The diehard, delusional Chiefs fan who called
Speaker 1: up to celebrate and take a bow for the Chiefs
Speaker 1: winning the NFL Draft without knowing who they actually drafted,
Speaker 1: or Mark in Denver, who wall on hold to play
Speaker 1: a game show was not paying attention and was listening
Speaker 1: to the best of Ben Maler Show podcasts.
Speaker 3: I don't think the chiefs fan is worthy of this title,
Speaker 3: so I'm gonna have to go with multitasking Ben Maller's voice.
Speaker 3: Was he listening to you on hold? Was he half
Speaker 3: listening and he wasn't listening?
Speaker 1: No, he was only listening. He got so confused. He
Speaker 1: was listening to the best of podcasts. He was that confused.
Speaker 3: That's even more confusing. So he's listening to the best
Speaker 3: of So what did he think you were doing? Just
Speaker 3: so like a run through taking caller like, I don't
Speaker 3: understand what was he doing on the phone?
Speaker 1: Then I don't understand either, he said. He he said
Speaker 1: he got confused, is what he said. He was a
Speaker 1: little how can you? But how do you get confused
Speaker 1: by that?
Speaker 3: This goes back to childhood concussions.
Speaker 1: It must be he needed one of those little hats
Speaker 1: CoA has. And then you're to go, yeah, all right,
Speaker 1: we'll get out on. We have the idiom of the week.
Speaker 1: Why don't we do the idiom of the week. Are
Speaker 1: you ready for the idiom of the week?
Speaker 3: Of course you're ready for You not idiot of the week.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, that's something different.
Speaker 3: But the idiom of the week.
Speaker 1: Yes, the idiom of the week. And this week we
Speaker 1: went deep into the idiom bag and the not the
Speaker 1: phrase of the week. No, no, no, The idiom of
Speaker 1: the week is smart Alec. It was you're such a
Speaker 1: smart Alec.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, my mom would say that a lot. I
Speaker 3: bet your mom be a smart Alec.
Speaker 1: I bet your mom didn't know where it came from.
Speaker 3: No, no chance.
Speaker 1: This is one of the all time great word origin stories.
Speaker 1: So as I understand it, this is so good. The
Speaker 1: term smart Alec goes back to the eighteen forties in
Speaker 1: New York City. It is actually referred it's obviously somebody
Speaker 1: named Alec Alec hog hoag Hogue, Alec Hogue, I guess
Speaker 1: as I say, And this guy was a con artist
Speaker 1: with his wife, and he would trick people out of
Speaker 1: their money. So the way it worked, he was a
Speaker 1: small time crook. He did pickpocketing, but the main source
Speaker 1: of his shenanigans was a version of the honey trap,
Speaker 1: an elaborate ruse where this guy, Alex Hogue's wife would
Speaker 1: work as a prostitute and lure the mark into a room.
Speaker 1: There would be a secret hiding place, and this guy,
Speaker 1: Mark mark Ho would hide out in the like a trapdoor,
Speaker 1: and the person who was there to hook up with
Speaker 1: his wife would would be, you know, starting to hook up,
Speaker 1: doing a little making out or whatever, and they'd be
Speaker 1: in the other room and Alec would pop out of
Speaker 1: the hidden panel, the hidden part of the room and
Speaker 1: steal the guy's wallet, his watch, whatever. He had no
Speaker 1: phone back then because they didn't have cellular phones, but
Speaker 1: he'd take all the valuables from the guy's clothes and
Speaker 1: then he would exit the room, close the trap door,
Speaker 1: go out, go around like a magician and say Ebra cadabra,
Speaker 1: hocus pocus. He compounding on the front door as an
Speaker 1: irate husband, what are you doing with my wife? And
Speaker 1: then the person would skid. Dad will just grab his clothes,
Speaker 1: not realizing his wallet was stolen and his watch was stolen,
Speaker 1: and just trying to get away from there. And that
Speaker 1: is where the term smart Alec originated. What a con
Speaker 1: artist man. Eighteen forties, they were pulling that trap that's
Speaker 1: like that still goes on today, but eighteen forty a
Speaker 1: trap door and a wife who was working as a
Speaker 1: prostitute to steal guys money. But I guess, are you
Speaker 1: a prostitute if you're not actually finishing the job, you're
Speaker 1: just like you kind of starting the job and not
Speaker 1: finishing the job.
Speaker 3: That's a good question. It's like the other day I
Speaker 3: saw Jay Glazer on Twitter.
Speaker 4: I was worried, and I'm worried where you're gonna no, no,
Speaker 4: And he was talking he had a video up with
Speaker 4: his fiance and her twin sister, and he was talking
Speaker 4: about how he's gonna Elope gets the two sisters mixed
Speaker 4: up if they wear the same outfits.
Speaker 3: And he's like, She's like, no, I'm the one you're
Speaker 3: engaged to. And he's like, oh, oh good, I got you.
Speaker 3: And they're haha laughing. But the first comment says, seriously,
Speaker 3: is it eloping if everybody knows about it? Yeah, that's
Speaker 3: because the definition you're a wordsmith, Yeah, to Elope means
Speaker 3: secretly getting married.
Speaker 1: Yeah. What is the term for just not inviting anyone
Speaker 1: to your wedding? That's what I did. I'm getting married.
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not inviting anyone. But yeah, you're right.
Speaker 1: Eloping is a marriage without without the ceremony and the
Speaker 1: typical reception and all that, without the night.
Speaker 3: It was the first thing I thought when I saw
Speaker 3: the post, and then the first comment or it said
Speaker 3: the same thing. I'm like, we're on the same page.
Speaker 3: Don't you like that when you look at the comments
Speaker 3: and the first person nails it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you're like, I'm on the right track on
Speaker 1: this because these people think the same way.
Speaker 3: Yeah. In the comments section is never wrong.
Speaker 1: No, I mean those the best and the brightest, the
Speaker 1: smartest people out there are in the comments section on anything,
Speaker 1: anything at all that it takes place. Speaking of comments,
Speaker 1: we seamlessly promoted I believe it was last week the
Speaker 1: Backscratcher looking for some friendly comments on the Backscratcher, the
Speaker 1: thing the Apple podcast page, trying to get that. Have
Speaker 1: you looked over there? Have you peaked over there?
Speaker 3: Yes? I have not peaked. I was going to give
Speaker 3: it a couple of weeks.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, well I haven't looked either.
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's keep it a surprise for next weekend.
Speaker 1: We don't want to ruin the podcast right now. But yeah,
Speaker 1: if you want to help us out Fifth Hour with
Speaker 1: Ben Malor podcast and of course my man Danny g
Speaker 1: as well, and you can leave a review. I haven't
Speaker 1: as of last week. I haven't looked, but we haven't
Speaker 1: had any since February. It's now May, so that's embarrassing.
Speaker 1: That's a bad job by man. And the downloads are
Speaker 1: going up. People are listening more, but they're just not
Speaker 1: You guys are not helping us out. On that Apple
Speaker 1: podcast page fifth Hour Podcast.
Speaker 3: Yeah, in the description of this very podcast, click on
Speaker 3: the link and it takes you right there. All.
Speaker 1: Have a wonderful Saturday. Enjoy the Kentucky Derby. I'll be
Speaker 1: watching that. Might even go out to the Dodger game.
Speaker 1: Don't tell anybody I call the Dodger game tonight. I
Speaker 1: haven't been out there yet.
Speaker 3: You are brave.
Speaker 1: They don't really want me out there, but they're playing
Speaker 1: the braves this weekend, as you said, so I'll see
Speaker 1: the Bravos and the Doyers. Anyway, have a wonderful day
Speaker 1: and we will talk to you on Sunday.
Speaker 3: Austa Pasta by Flatious