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Speaker 1: Listen with all the kinky ship that we've been telling
Speaker 1: y'all motherfucker's to do, and autumn listening to letters you'a
Speaker 1: have been writing in with all these goddamn problems. Get
Speaker 1: on talk Space. Okay. I've been going to a therapist
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Speaker 1: I talk to him because I just want to really
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Speaker 1: to show. Yes. Also, guys, if you do not know,
Speaker 1: we will be in the A t L this weekend.
Speaker 1: This Saturday, come check us at the Plaza Theater. We
Speaker 1: are coming to you guys live. It's gonna be lit.
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Speaker 1: got you guy, damn it. Um, we will be there.
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Speaker 1: to another episode Guys of Horrible decisions. This is a
Speaker 1: girl Mandy B and girl super hot girl. We are
Speaker 1: joined by such a beautiful woman. I've been talking her
Speaker 1: on Instagram. I've been like, can you come this week?
Speaker 1: Can you come this week? Can you come to se
Speaker 1: And finally we got her in, so can you buy?
Speaker 1: Let's just started off with that. Do you like women? Look?
Speaker 1: Here we go? Can you stop throwing your pussy to
Speaker 1: everybody I'm throwing I'm trying to look out for you.
Speaker 1: I got this. You ain't gotta word about me, You
Speaker 1: ain't gotta word my emoji game strong under them pictures.
Speaker 1: But do you want to go ahead and introduce yourself
Speaker 1: to our listeners and let them know who you are
Speaker 1: and what you do? Sure? Hillou know, my name is
Speaker 1: Jimmie little mu Um. I'm a writer and a cultural
Speaker 1: critic and VP of programming. What's a cultural touch critic?
Speaker 1: Cultural credit? So she canceled people, That's what Van later
Speaker 1: was like. So she basically canceled. Van always says, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, I actually don't. I'm always doing like that.
Speaker 1: We don't canceled like, well, we canceled Kanye. But it's
Speaker 1: like you it has to be like it's just like,
Speaker 1: all right, So there's like she's like, Jamala, Okay, Jamila,
Speaker 1: what you're about to say about Kanye? You're telling me
Speaker 1: that everybody knows how much I love him? You about
Speaker 1: tell me were not canceled this because still listen. Okay,
Speaker 1: you know what. You don't like the word woke, But
Speaker 1: I was trying to tell you I do hate the word.
Speaker 1: I think it's embarrassing. He say, why she not canceling Kanye?
Speaker 1: So think back to what years in school? Right? You
Speaker 1: like high school? You get like a detention, you get
Speaker 1: maybe get a warning, you get attention, you get into suspension,
Speaker 1: get out of school suspension. Then you get expelled, right
Speaker 1: So like she said, you skipp into the expulsion too quick.
Speaker 1: So no, no, no, no no, So I wouldn't say
Speaker 1: that he's expelled, but he got to be at a
Speaker 1: whole other school for a minute, and maybe he can
Speaker 1: come back. Like he's not done forever. But like you
Speaker 1: got a lie, you gotta do summer school, you gotta
Speaker 1: do exact, taken to jail, You smoke weed outside, You
Speaker 1: go to jail for a few days, maybe get a ticket,
Speaker 1: you kill somebody. We ain't never gonna see you again.
Speaker 1: This motherfucker said slavery was a choice? Are we not done? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I'm done. I'm done with I guess with the asterisk
Speaker 1: by it that like if you came back and said
Speaker 1: everything I said was wrong, I was fucked up on
Speaker 1: cocaine or I was I suspect. You know, I'm not
Speaker 1: making any allegations. I'm just saying that his speech patterns
Speaker 1: are like that. This episode is coming out on What
Speaker 1: Made fourteen? So who knows what else do right by now?
Speaker 1: But I don't know if you're a listener of the show,
Speaker 1: But I am obsessed with Kanye right me and Alex
Speaker 1: both we went to a fucking Kanye art show on
Speaker 1: Saturday right before he said that slavery was a choice.
Speaker 1: Thing thought. I thought you were getting ready to say,
Speaker 1: you're not. You can't cancel him, you can't cancel I'm
Speaker 1: not even gonna lie. I thought she was going to
Speaker 1: be super like I know Kanye did this, but four Kanye,
Speaker 1: because she's upset so much easy Verge. I cut it
Speaker 1: up on live I said that was one of those
Speaker 1: who videotaped themselves crying on Instagram. I'm gonna tell you
Speaker 1: what I didn't because I'm not a hype beast, but
Speaker 1: I'm not about to sit here and wear that make
Speaker 1: America again. And everybody knows I have mad easy ship
Speaker 1: on my page and I don't ever want to be
Speaker 1: associated with it again. So whether it's called a hype
Speaker 1: beast or not, I'll jump on the team of not
Speaker 1: working with Trump and fucking with black people and there
Speaker 1: I don't funk with him at all right now. Like
Speaker 1: I only like he can come back if he appolot.
Speaker 1: He has to say everything I said was wrong. Here's
Speaker 1: how you know whether it's just I was wrong or
Speaker 1: something was wrong with me. But you have to like
Speaker 1: disavove but the narcissist. So I don't think that narcissists
Speaker 1: admit to be. He tried to red nig you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying once Van called him out, which is
Speaker 1: why I kind of upset me when I just got it.
Speaker 1: Did you see the video after and it was like,
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter, you needed to say something to me.
Speaker 1: And you know who really pissed me off, the black
Speaker 1: dude with the dreads from jams TMZ Charles. His face
Speaker 1: should have been a fucking meme. Yeah it wasn't. You
Speaker 1: should have jumped and you sat here with y'all black
Speaker 1: ass and let him do the ship? Don't how many
Speaker 1: white people watch TMZ? Do you know any white people
Speaker 1: can't wait to fucking say? I mean, dude, even Kanye said,
Speaker 1: you guys just I was sitting there like where's Van?
Speaker 1: Because I didn't know, like I have been offline for
Speaker 1: a while, so maybe it had been up for like
Speaker 1: an hour before I saw it, So like I'm just
Speaker 1: watching Harvey and you know, and and Charles and Kanye,
Speaker 1: and just like I said, wait, I'm looking at I
Speaker 1: was like, you're not going to react, like you're not, like,
Speaker 1: why are you not? Like matter? He's black, right, he's blind.
Speaker 1: But it's an interview and you have to realize, although
Speaker 1: we like cutting motherfucker's off, you gotta let people talk.
Speaker 1: Otherwise they wouldn't have gotten what they got from Kanye
Speaker 1: had he interrupted him, Okay, had like Kanye shoot himself
Speaker 1: and the fan wasn't more um what passed around clip
Speaker 1: than the rest of the ship was Van going off,
Speaker 1: more people talking about that, I guess he would have
Speaker 1: got that go ahead. What did you guys see how
Speaker 1: they cut it up? Though? Yeah, that's what it is yeah.
Speaker 1: But when he said the um slavery was a choice.
Speaker 1: In the longer version, he clarifies mental enslavement. Stop stops.
Speaker 1: You're telling me how do you get mentally enslaved? Do
Speaker 1: you think they did that by choice? By sitting there
Speaker 1: and watching people revolt and then then they caught slaves
Speaker 1: and raped and killed them and sucked their wives in
Speaker 1: front of people. Do you think we mentally were just
Speaker 1: We could have broke free from that, but that was
Speaker 1: a choice. Did you see the Charlemagne Charlomagne? That's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. He speaks about it. I read no, I
Speaker 1: read the clothes, and it's still the word choice. Why
Speaker 1: would you do it again? Why would he say it again? Slavery?
Speaker 1: You know, like we're not talking about like being captured, right,
Speaker 1: We're not talking about like what could you have done
Speaker 1: at the point where they showed up? You know what
Speaker 1: I mean? You're saying like people that were here, we're
Speaker 1: supposed to in a foreign land where they don't know
Speaker 1: how many white people they're surrounded by, they don't know
Speaker 1: what they mean, They can't like religion is sitting there
Speaker 1: telling you don't understand anything. These are people that are uneducated.
Speaker 1: Let's not talk about you know, we're not not educated,
Speaker 1: but they could not speak the language of this land,
Speaker 1: and they didn't know this, you know what I mean
Speaker 1: in terms of what they You weren't educated enough to
Speaker 1: know what to do. I mean, we can all agree
Speaker 1: with that, right, I mean, sure, it's not like they
Speaker 1: weren't capable of that. But when you're literally kept from
Speaker 1: learning how to read, how can you formulate any how
Speaker 1: can you formulate this plane to leave without being scared?
Speaker 1: And many of them did, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Like there was they were and they were met with violence.
Speaker 1: Like for every Harriet Tubman, there scores other that tries,
Speaker 1: you know, like they're the idea that we were just
Speaker 1: happy on the plane. You know, I'm happy in the house,
Speaker 1: so I'm happy on the plantation, or like, well it's
Speaker 1: just sad, we're just gonna be. That's not who our
Speaker 1: people were. And I just hate anytime somebody and you know,
Speaker 1: obviously Kanye does it on a way worse level, but
Speaker 1: just you know, even hearing kids talk sometimes like there's
Speaker 1: there's some shame around slavery and we should be embarrassed,
Speaker 1: but we think of them. It's just like victims. But
Speaker 1: it's like, no, you you didn't die, like enough of
Speaker 1: you survived that we're here, We're still here, like y'all
Speaker 1: were heroes. Like the numbers. You don't think about the numbers.
Speaker 1: I swear to God, let me tell you how hard
Speaker 1: it was from I have sold to pay for a
Speaker 1: Kanye concert when I was in college. So you guys
Speaker 1: maybe can't understand. I mean, if you listen, you know
Speaker 1: how much I love Kanye. But I've used my money
Speaker 1: to fucking support this motherfucker's so giving up my things
Speaker 1: to support him. Do you know what I feel like
Speaker 1: right now? I'm so embarrassed. I had no choice but
Speaker 1: to be a fucking hype piast, so you say, and
Speaker 1: cut up ship and asked for a dick sucking squad
Speaker 1: for for Van because he does. I almost thought when
Speaker 1: I saw that Kanye clip, I was like, I can't
Speaker 1: funk my boys. I was never like a huge fan
Speaker 1: of Kanye, so it didn't like resonate to me the same.
Speaker 1: I mean, of course what he said, definitely, I was
Speaker 1: just like this motherfucker, but I was never that much
Speaker 1: of a fan. Like to me, if Jake Cole would
Speaker 1: have came out and said some like this it hurts,
Speaker 1: so I can I guess I can see. But I
Speaker 1: think Jake Hoole is way more woke than that. But Jack,
Speaker 1: you know, but I think you know. And I'm from Chicago,
Speaker 1: you know, I know like I am, and so I
Speaker 1: have like I have a certain The first time I
Speaker 1: saw big Men to perform, he was in high school,
Speaker 1: like it was a south By Southwest because he was
Speaker 1: in this band called Kids these Days, and so they're like,
Speaker 1: I'm in my mid twenties and he was like eighteen somewhere,
Speaker 1: an interesting kid I've never I don't know him, you know,
Speaker 1: but we have people in common. But he just reminds
Speaker 1: me so much of the neighborhood where we grew up.
Speaker 1: I'm like, people think that there's something we're going on, Like, no,
Speaker 1: he is such a high park as artsy boy, Like
Speaker 1: he is exactly creative. I got a thing for creatives
Speaker 1: right now. Like I've just realized that every guy I
Speaker 1: deal with this like covered with tattoos and can't really
Speaker 1: speak very well. But um, anyways, we're gonna tattoos can't
Speaker 1: talk shi. So what we like to do when we
Speaker 1: have guests, Um, and we haven't done this in a
Speaker 1: while because y'all have been having all these episodes with
Speaker 1: just me wheezy. But we do icebreakers. So with icebreakers,
Speaker 1: we kind of like to break the ice. Um and
Speaker 1: so fuck you, I didn't know do it we do
Speaker 1: because that was not implied. Fuck you? Um, we liked.
Speaker 1: What we're gonna do this episode is we're gonna have
Speaker 1: two questions for would you rather? Um? So the first
Speaker 1: question being that we are all women, and this is
Speaker 1: a conversation we haven't yet really had on the show.
Speaker 1: I wanted to ask, would you rather get come in
Speaker 1: your hair after you just finished styling it? Or right
Speaker 1: in your eye? And I know this is the point
Speaker 1: for black girls. We don't like it not half sucked up?
Speaker 1: You would do hair over your eye? Well, I guess
Speaker 1: I makes it ever had to come in your eye?
Speaker 1: I mean it makes it like a pink eye. But
Speaker 1: you could say pink eye, You got pink I if
Speaker 1: it's I want to look contagious, or just get you
Speaker 1: get flakes like white flakes? If that coan? You can
Speaker 1: that mean getting my hair? Weghing really the greatest tragedy
Speaker 1: so freshly, But I mean I have natural hair, so
Speaker 1: like even freshly style. It's like so, I mean, I
Speaker 1: guess okay, So if I got it pressed out, pressed out,
Speaker 1: I still don't want in my eye like you said,
Speaker 1: like if you got a pink guy, dude, have you salt?
Speaker 1: I've never had it, and I mean, come that I'm
Speaker 1: just swallowing. Don't taste like nothing. So I don't think
Speaker 1: he come would taste like anything. But it's still is
Speaker 1: there a lot of salt in it? If it doesn't
Speaker 1: take my eyes, I don't want anything in my eye period. Okay,
Speaker 1: so we're taking the hair. I'd rather you come on
Speaker 1: my shirt and I'd have to wear a stain for
Speaker 1: the rest of the day that you come in my eye.
Speaker 1: People like, damn, you got pink. I no, it's just coming.
Speaker 1: You know. You don't say it's gonna be like damn, man,
Speaker 1: but it's contagious, pink, contous. Okay, okay, nigg is come
Speaker 1: in our hair, don't come in our eye. You said,
Speaker 1: what's a great question, what's the problem. I was really
Speaker 1: thinking about my hair being done because I used to
Speaker 1: be one of those like my hair done, what you're doing,
Speaker 1: calm down, just put a hair bad on. You got
Speaker 1: sunglasses inside like it's a little fright. I gotta put
Speaker 1: a shower cap on that when I fun, bitch, you
Speaker 1: asked him niggas to aim. Okay, okay, sometimes you're on.
Speaker 1: If you can't get it, you're only gonna get titties.
Speaker 1: If you want faith, you beat below the brow. I
Speaker 1: don't know. So this is my next question, Um, would
Speaker 1: you rather date someone who takes five seconds to come
Speaker 1: or who takes at least five hours to come? And
Speaker 1: I asked because I just had this talk on my
Speaker 1: Instagram life and um, so for the people that don't know,
Speaker 1: I've been working with the same guy since November, just
Speaker 1: recently had new dick, um, and that new Dick took
Speaker 1: forty minutes in real life to come. And I was,
Speaker 1: this isn't sex minutes, this is real life minutes. So
Speaker 1: in six minutes it felt like five hours. Um, And
Speaker 1: I just was really just like, I think I would
Speaker 1: kind of rather nigga come fast than do like it.
Speaker 1: It's a lot. So I wanted to know what you
Speaker 1: guys want, would y'all Rather than they can take a
Speaker 1: long time to come or come fast, I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: fast and just do something else. Well, yeah, so like
Speaker 1: fast if he can get it back up again, you know,
Speaker 1: because the thing is like, I'm thirty three, so like
Speaker 1: my sex drive is really high, you know, and like
Speaker 1: and there. I love how she threw that in there.
Speaker 1: So it's very you heard them. I'm beautiful. I'm a
Speaker 1: VP right right, Well, I'm most perfect, but I have
Speaker 1: a kid. Sorry, I'm just kidding. That makes me more. Actually,
Speaker 1: I just sucked somebody baby mama, so I think I'm
Speaker 1: down for Why are you get that? I know I
Speaker 1: said on a recent episode. I didn't. I don't like
Speaker 1: sucking um girl women who have kids, she would mean,
Speaker 1: but but I didn't. Just suck someone with kids and
Speaker 1: it was fine, So I think I changed my mind.
Speaker 1: Girl might want to wait, fans made what are you single? Yes?
Speaker 1: I am. I thought she was working on fans. You
Speaker 1: better because I'm on this already, So back up. I'm
Speaker 1: not not saying anyone, but I'm not in an exclusive relationship.
Speaker 1: That's right. The best way to say so, both of you,
Speaker 1: both of y'all say though you would rather a nigga
Speaker 1: come fast thing, Well, if he can't the thing, if
Speaker 1: he can, if he can get back up, if it's
Speaker 1: just like who I'm tired that a lot of them
Speaker 1: are like that. So like the long thing, it went
Speaker 1: like I like to have sex for a long time.
Speaker 1: It wouldn't bother me. That breaks, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Playing between we can watch watching the Marrow and then fun.
Speaker 1: That's my routine right now. Well he came like so
Speaker 1: the guy that I was working like, he had me
Speaker 1: in every position, like to where he had me ride
Speaker 1: dick like for different ways. Was it the first time
Speaker 1: you have text? Um, don't bring this up. It wasn't.
Speaker 1: It wasn't ask you because maybe he was trying to
Speaker 1: press you know, we eight years ago, but you know
Speaker 1: long ago. He don't. He didn't remember. We ain't remember. Well,
Speaker 1: I remember sucking, but I didn't bring it up because
Speaker 1: the first time it happened. Why was he trying to
Speaker 1: impress me? It's the first time? Well, I don't think so,
Speaker 1: because we know. You know why I want to say this?
Speaker 1: Can you know why I want to say this? No?
Speaker 1: Real quick, there is no impressing when we sucked three times,
Speaker 1: So I ended up saying at his house for like
Speaker 1: damn near twenty four hours. We sucked three times. Each
Speaker 1: time we sucked those three times, he lasted the same
Speaker 1: amount of time. I then went over his house two
Speaker 1: days later and we sucked again, and then had a threesome.
Speaker 1: And when we had the threesome, he lasted the same
Speaker 1: amount of time. Then we sucked in the morning. He
Speaker 1: his baby mama. But we're not gonna talk. Why do
Speaker 1: we This is than a fucking religios dude, only the section?
Speaker 1: Sorry it just can you interview with me? Story? So
Speaker 1: this is the nigga? Why up to the block that
Speaker 1: motherfucker out? Don't bring up all the details? Bro? Okay,
Speaker 1: So you feel does he now know that he sucked
Speaker 1: you eight years ago? Because I didn't bring up the
Speaker 1: last time because it wasn't a good run. We didn't
Speaker 1: have a podcast. M hm. No, I don't know. But
Speaker 1: she was their relationship. Um, he's she's his first baby mama.
Speaker 1: We're not going to talk about the amount that he has.
Speaker 1: Can y'all not judge me? But yeah, he's she's his
Speaker 1: first baby mama. Um. And yeah they have a few
Speaker 1: kids together. But they're no longer together. Girl, Please, No,
Speaker 1: they're not any longer together together enough they're still they'll
Speaker 1: have sex. I mean, I don't know how often. I
Speaker 1: don't think it was. He sucked you two days before
Speaker 1: his eight MoMA and she was that down. They still
Speaker 1: don't ny I wouldn't care. I mean, she's not the
Speaker 1: plus one you are, Yeah, but actually I didn't feel
Speaker 1: that way. So he didn't kiss her or eat her
Speaker 1: pussy the whole time, but he kissed me, and which
Speaker 1: made me kind of feel uncomfortable really because I thought
Speaker 1: I was the plus one, but I didn't feel like
Speaker 1: the plus one at all. And when he had talked
Speaker 1: about his relationship with her, I don't think like he
Speaker 1: would never be back with the intimacy. Wasn't there that
Speaker 1: I would have expected to be there if I was
Speaker 1: the plus one. So I mean it was fun well
Speaker 1: for y'all because y'all looking ready? What did you say?
Speaker 1: Because I wanted a three cements so I've been wanting
Speaker 1: the three three to her too. She was very pretty.
Speaker 1: I mean I didn't know what she looked like until
Speaker 1: they came and picked me up in real life. I
Speaker 1: don't even ask for a picture because he, like you
Speaker 1: on Instagram? Was good? Shut the fuck up? No, it
Speaker 1: was fun. You know what this is? This is man
Speaker 1: mad weight. She want to show that body. You know
Speaker 1: you do and this is very like I just got it,
Speaker 1: like whoever wants to see Well, I've been so so
Speaker 1: this is the thing that knew me for show, bitch,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to get some out. But um no, I've
Speaker 1: been wanting to have a threesome with seven but the
Speaker 1: last time I had I'm not emotional. Bit The problem
Speaker 1: is he wants me to bring in a girl. The
Speaker 1: last time that I brought one of my friends into
Speaker 1: a threesome with this nigga who was dropping that fire
Speaker 1: as dick, she like went behind my back on the
Speaker 1: Instagram and they that matter. She no, because that's my dick, bitch.
Speaker 1: That's why I don't want my friends like at the
Speaker 1: time she was a close friend. So I don't want
Speaker 1: my friends sucking my consistent dick, especially when you're local. No,
Speaker 1: it's not's not me being emotional at all. This is
Speaker 1: my dick, and you know that this is who I
Speaker 1: have consistently. Not only that, I don't want to bring
Speaker 1: in a local bitch because then she may be starting
Speaker 1: to take I don't need my days taken away from
Speaker 1: me like no, so that but it was a good point.
Speaker 1: Fuck you. I don't let's get back to the baby
Speaker 1: mama drama. It's no, I'm not gonna. Don't you want
Speaker 1: to hear them up because I don't only because I
Speaker 1: had I don't you know, I don't like those terms.
Speaker 1: But I have a baby daddy, and I like, I
Speaker 1: adore him. We have a wonderful relationship. He's married. I love,
Speaker 1: you know, his wife. She and I have gay friends.
Speaker 1: I could not fathom, even if she were in the picture,
Speaker 1: wanting to like, we're just so not that that's that's why.
Speaker 1: Well she loved his dick. It was it was good.
Speaker 1: I can't even hold you like if me and say
Speaker 1: seven were to have kids and we're not together, that
Speaker 1: dick is so baby mama. Before he picked you up, Yeah,
Speaker 1: he told me his baby mama. I trusted him. I said, well,
Speaker 1: she looked like she said, she's pretty well long hair.
Speaker 1: I said, okay, I didn't. And I don't know how
Speaker 1: it was fun. I just like it just happened out
Speaker 1: his sister wives. I wouldn't mind that situation. He got,
Speaker 1: he got money, we're rich. How many guest passes they
Speaker 1: got to the games. This is what I'll be talking
Speaker 1: about in season. We're not worried about guest passes. Um. Anyways,
Speaker 1: we're gonna go ahead and get into our finilship for
Speaker 1: this episode. Y'all ship, y'all really are just not shipped
Speaker 1: like and you know it was. I had a great time.
Speaker 1: Um fuck y'all sit my god damn smoothie. Um. Anyways, guys,
Speaker 1: so we're gonna go onto our vanilla ship. As you
Speaker 1: guys know, we choose an article, um and which talks
Speaker 1: about some things that are going on and you know,
Speaker 1: god damn society. Sometimes it has to do with sex,
Speaker 1: sometimes it doesn't. This specific one because we have another
Speaker 1: woman in the house and we haven't had a woman
Speaker 1: guest in a while, have we Not that I can
Speaker 1: email guests, we just literally had, did we Yeah, Jesse,
Speaker 1: oh okay, we were we were okay, but those were
Speaker 1: okay with both of us. So, UM, I wanted to
Speaker 1: bring this up. We haven't really had the discussion about it,
Speaker 1: and a lot of our listeners say that we dropped
Speaker 1: the ball in by not discussing it. So I kind
Speaker 1: of wanted to bring up this topic. Um. It is
Speaker 1: about the me too movement. Um. We kind of talked
Speaker 1: about this a little bit before, so Russell Simmons. As
Speaker 1: you guys know, he recently UM was char with a
Speaker 1: sexual assault allegation. UM. And it's odd because he has
Speaker 1: come forth issuing statements that he's now supporting the me
Speaker 1: too movement? Can you turn this off? Oh, she has
Speaker 1: a vibrator going on, bro, It's a vibrator that she
Speaker 1: hasn't used yet. UM. Anyway, So I wanted to kind
Speaker 1: of have the discussion with you guys if you feel
Speaker 1: that a guy who has sexually assaulted a female in
Speaker 1: any way possible, UM, if he can kind of support
Speaker 1: this type of movement or what what do you think
Speaker 1: of a guy who does no. I mean, this isn't
Speaker 1: like this is like George Zimmerman coming out for Black
Speaker 1: Lives Matter, you know what I'm saying. It's because he's like,
Speaker 1: we're in the middle of it. We're not talking about
Speaker 1: years later. I've been in therapy because that was the
Speaker 1: story investigations. I think it's it's almost a UM. I
Speaker 1: don't know if like his PR team made him do
Speaker 1: something like this. Every big mockery out of these women, absolutely,
Speaker 1: and just the moment and just that you think you're
Speaker 1: so arrogant to think that you're a necessary voice right now.
Speaker 1: I think the thing is he would have he played himself,
Speaker 1: because early on, when the allegations started, you know, the
Speaker 1: first two, he responds with like, you know, I'm sorry
Speaker 1: for anyone that I've heard, you know, basically kind of
Speaker 1: like I never thought i'd done something like this, but
Speaker 1: I was young, I drugs. I'm a very different person now,
Speaker 1: So anyone who I may have heard unintentionally blah blah blah,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. And so then as the allegations started piling up,
Speaker 1: that's when he's like he tried to do the hashtag
Speaker 1: not me remember, and he believe any social for a minute,
Speaker 1: like all his accounts were because it was really quick,
Speaker 1: because he had a whole like and as soon as
Speaker 1: he had accuses, he like stepped down from his position.
Speaker 1: That was also a pr was like, you're taking this
Speaker 1: break from your you know, you can't be a public
Speaker 1: figure right now. You can't be leaving these companies. You're
Speaker 1: gonna go work on you and figure this stuff out.
Speaker 1: And then as they started to come on, I guess
Speaker 1: after a while he was like, no, not all of
Speaker 1: these people are telling the truth, and I want to,
Speaker 1: you know, tell hi outside of the story, not me,
Speaker 1: you know. And then he started to kind of imply
Speaker 1: that he hadn't really done anything too wrong to anyone.
Speaker 1: It just it was a bad one. Like I feel
Speaker 1: like he might have been going without his PR team
Speaker 1: before and now there might be someone trying to help
Speaker 1: that out a bit. But I just it's you know,
Speaker 1: what he needs to do right now is sit down,
Speaker 1: be quiet, um, get some help for things. And I
Speaker 1: think it's crazy too because he is a man who
Speaker 1: has two daughters or maybe is it three. I mean,
Speaker 1: he has a lot of kids. I don't think well
Speaker 1: for him to have daughters. And I say that because
Speaker 1: he actually brought up his daughters in a post in
Speaker 1: saying this, Um, he said, shout out to black women
Speaker 1: just because um. He paid tribute to black women who
Speaker 1: have bared the biggest burden and the unequal treatment of
Speaker 1: women of all races and religions, and suggested that without
Speaker 1: guidance from the family enforces, then men will destroy the planet. Right,
Speaker 1: it's just right wire you talking that a few weeks ago,
Speaker 1: So shut up. It's just that's your take on this.
Speaker 1: Do you feel do you feel like maybe it's something
Speaker 1: that he just shouldn't even be talking about Yes, yes, agreed, right,
Speaker 1: you shouldn't be talking Can you just imagine It's like
Speaker 1: Snoop Dogg starts telling us, like from a from a
Speaker 1: lighter scale, starts telling us that weed is bad for you.
Speaker 1: I should not let's talk about snows for a minute
Speaker 1: because wait, the Snoop allegations against him. No, but but
Speaker 1: and I know I'm a little bit older, thank you all.
Speaker 1: But like I remember Snoop at the MTV Awards with
Speaker 1: the two women on chains like dogs write like you know,
Speaker 1: was known as a pimp right like during his and
Speaker 1: has talked about it because I remember he did, like
Speaker 1: girls can a lot of stuff and I'm not saying
Speaker 1: that that, I'm not criticizing it might not have been
Speaker 1: girls going well, but he did some sort of porn
Speaker 1: kind of where he was hosting not you know, and
Speaker 1: I'm not judging that stuff. But I remember him talking
Speaker 1: about pamping, you know, and so I'm like, if you
Speaker 1: were actually an active pamp to things that you did
Speaker 1: to women and girls, you don't have any row. And
Speaker 1: he and I know that he's been going in on Kanye.
Speaker 1: I know that he's had this kind of race consciousness
Speaker 1: things going for a while, and I appreciate that, but
Speaker 1: I'm like, where are you going to deal with your
Speaker 1: gender stuff? You know, like when are you like, like,
Speaker 1: when are we going to talk about that? Make them?
Speaker 1: I'm not saying like Sloop you have to be canceled
Speaker 1: forever because at this point, look you're doing a cooking
Speaker 1: show with Martha Stewart, Like there's no there's also something
Speaker 1: about just like how you know, brilliantius they talked about
Speaker 1: rape culture, how they didn't know and how Russell said
Speaker 1: it was years ago. There was also something that I
Speaker 1: think was more so widespread and more mainstream dieties acceptable
Speaker 1: as far as the treatment of women years ago. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: and I don't necessarily know if these men would do
Speaker 1: that today. But there's another thing to be said though
Speaker 1: about a persona right, So like the girls unchained at
Speaker 1: an awards show, it's this like I'm Snoop Dogg. It's
Speaker 1: like this lavish sub play. Whatever the pimp thing even
Speaker 1: I think, well no, but he was claimed to have
Speaker 1: actually had women in his stable, that he was a pimp.
Speaker 1: But it was a thing that was so fucking cat
Speaker 1: williams um, what was it do? That was on next
Speaker 1: Friday that was next to him, Magic Mike or something,
Speaker 1: Magic mic something like that. All of these dudes were
Speaker 1: like it was like to boast and brag about it
Speaker 1: made it fucking cool. But I only wanted to be
Speaker 1: with pimps. Actually, we have an episode coming out with
Speaker 1: a girl named Ali x x X. I didn't know this,
Speaker 1: but I kind of assumed that there had to have
Speaker 1: been something good about being with a pimp, So I
Speaker 1: asked her. She was a former escort. I said, does
Speaker 1: it give you safety? Like broken woman? You know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying, Like, does it give you safety? Does it
Speaker 1: like does he stand by you? Does he make sure
Speaker 1: that the men are like screen or something like that.
Speaker 1: She's like, no, they literally take your money. Women just
Speaker 1: want to have someone. But I think also when you
Speaker 1: we're looking back into the hip hop culture and how
Speaker 1: they did women, um tip Drill was one of the
Speaker 1: most like iconic videos and if we progress and I
Speaker 1: don't think but even looking back at that video, Okay, Alex,
Speaker 1: don't be over there reminiscent now because stuff. But the
Speaker 1: thing is, so I don't think I like stripper culture.
Speaker 1: I don't think there's any I like strippers you know,
Speaker 1: I'm saying I've never thought anything was wrong with stripping.
Speaker 1: The problem is not the dancer system men, right, So
Speaker 1: like people talk about like, oh, she's a dancer or
Speaker 1: she does sex work. Clearly no dad, no self esteem,
Speaker 1: no goals, no educate, all these things that are oftentimes,
Speaker 1: you know, arguably more often than not wrong, right, Like
Speaker 1: many of them brilliant girls where they go to college
Speaker 1: or not right, many don't have great relationships with their
Speaker 1: families and they this is what they wanted to do,
Speaker 1: or and maybe they don't, maybe they don't love it,
Speaker 1: but they're like, it's a job in the same way
Speaker 1: do you love cooking fries? Do you love And it's
Speaker 1: the closest thing to sales work, you know. But but
Speaker 1: what stripper that you really don't want to dance for
Speaker 1: you and you spend their money like you spend your
Speaker 1: money on them. They'd be like, come on, Like the
Speaker 1: problem is that there are so many men who don't
Speaker 1: know how to respect women period. Right. So it's like
Speaker 1: I don't think that if he says, well, you treat
Speaker 1: a housewife like a housewife and a hooker like a hooker,
Speaker 1: that that don't don't think he respects the housewife, right, like,
Speaker 1: don't think that for a minute. Like if you don't
Speaker 1: see the ability of us to be full human beings
Speaker 1: who deserve you know, maybe you don't want to be
Speaker 1: married to somebody who's on a pole, that's your right,
Speaker 1: the same way the pole dancer could be like, I
Speaker 1: don't want to be married to a square who works office. Right,
Speaker 1: there's nothing wrong with them, But when you say that
Speaker 1: the quality of that person, you're right, it's different because
Speaker 1: this one does something related to sex and this one doesn't.
Speaker 1: And so with so many men come into the clubs
Speaker 1: with the attitude that's someone just hey, we go have fun,
Speaker 1: we slap ass, we talk ship, you know, get a dance,
Speaker 1: maybe something extra bout They still respect these women as people,
Speaker 1: but it's a lot of them to think that with
Speaker 1: their little you know, and they come in that they've
Speaker 1: bought her, you know, like not nothing. That sex work
Speaker 1: is um something that women too to do. And like
Speaker 1: some women and were the ones we've at least interviewed,
Speaker 1: including Allele here soon enjoyed what she did. She she's
Speaker 1: now she's a mom now and she said, shit, I
Speaker 1: miss having an adventure and any man and ship like that.
Speaker 1: All these women aren't fucking broken something else. It's something
Speaker 1: that I feel is strange and I don't know why
Speaker 1: men do it, And maybe you have an answer to this,
Speaker 1: but even a female who's open with her sexuality or
Speaker 1: one who chooses to get into stripping or porn um,
Speaker 1: they blame it on daddy issues. Um. A lot of
Speaker 1: men feel like had had a man been involved, she
Speaker 1: wouldn't be doing Chris Rock joke. You know, my job
Speaker 1: is to keep him off the pole. You know, my
Speaker 1: number one job as a father is to keep my
Speaker 1: daughters off the pole. And I remember laughing at it
Speaker 1: at the time when it came out, and everybody laughed
Speaker 1: at it. And you know my dad would you reference
Speaker 1: him from time to time, and he made a joke
Speaker 1: about the other day and I was like, well, actually, know,
Speaker 1: your job is to make sure that your daughter is happy, healthy,
Speaker 1: and well adjusted, whether she's on a pole or not.
Speaker 1: And Dan that would say an entertainment industry women that
Speaker 1: would say they still don't want their kids, do I
Speaker 1: think that? Yeah? But I think the something absolutely yeah.
Speaker 1: I agree. Yeah. And the stigma and the lack of
Speaker 1: safety in a world where you know, women are already
Speaker 1: sigmatized and and already unsafe. That yes, in certain environments
Speaker 1: is it's exacerbated by doing sex work right. And some
Speaker 1: of them is super safe and some of them is
Speaker 1: not so. And your average person doesn't know the spectrum
Speaker 1: of all the different things you could be doing, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like you couldn't be safe, you
Speaker 1: could be empowered, You could be surrounded by women and
Speaker 1: people who care about you. But they can only see
Speaker 1: the ceedy motel from the amateur horn, you know, they
Speaker 1: can only see the stories in the newspaper about somebody
Speaker 1: getting murdered off of Craigslist and stuff. So it's not
Speaker 1: you know, I don't think we should be surprised. The
Speaker 1: families are like, this isn't what I want for my child.
Speaker 1: But what we have to really, you know, as a feminist,
Speaker 1: Like for me, it's about encouraging people to like, don't
Speaker 1: talk about these women and girls, is that they're less
Speaker 1: than somebody who does something, you know, quote a respectable
Speaker 1: And I want to bring up that I thought was amazing.
Speaker 1: And I hate to bring up all these tidbits and
Speaker 1: pieces from an episode that people are gonna hear, but
Speaker 1: we I interviewed an escort that said, I'm so tired
Speaker 1: of the whole hierarchy, and Cardi B said something about,
Speaker 1: don't get it twisted. I wasn't sucking for money. I
Speaker 1: was just a stripper, And she's like, okay, there's the
Speaker 1: one hose, you know, not greater than the other hole.
Speaker 1: She said that street walkers look at women that are
Speaker 1: escorts online like they're lazy, and the other ones look
Speaker 1: at them like they're dirt. And it's like, but we've
Speaker 1: all fucking done it though, But unfortunately, that's what I'm saying, Like,
Speaker 1: as women, we already have men beating us down and
Speaker 1: saying certain things, um, because of the choices we make
Speaker 1: with our bodies. I feel like, as women and people,
Speaker 1: especially as us wanting to empower each other, shouldn't be
Speaker 1: sitting here making any type of hierarchy or thinking, um,
Speaker 1: I'm a better home because I charged a thousand dollars
Speaker 1: and you only charge two hundred. Maybe people all right, well,
Speaker 1: part of that is like that is patriarchy, right, So
Speaker 1: the same way like the things that the men say
Speaker 1: to us, like oh, you know, I'm judging you based
Speaker 1: on how many people you've been with or how sun
Speaker 1: your skirt is or whatever, like when we're so often
Speaker 1: we're competing for men, either actually a real life man
Speaker 1: or just the idea of who's a more desirable woman,
Speaker 1: who has who occupies a better station in society, you know,
Speaker 1: and so much of that is tied to our relationships
Speaker 1: to men. On the other side, it's just capitalism, right,
Speaker 1: So it's like the same way the person who waits
Speaker 1: tables at you know, Ruth Chris might look down at
Speaker 1: the person who waits table looks down at Danny's who
Speaker 1: looks down And McDonald the girl um a few years
Speaker 1: ago who was a waitress or maybe bartender at a
Speaker 1: high end restaurant, and she would always talk about girls
Speaker 1: that worked like an old garden. I'm like, man, but
Speaker 1: it's probably busier. Like I mean, like just to just
Speaker 1: to to judge based off that. I think that it's
Speaker 1: um counterproductive and what a lot of us women are
Speaker 1: trying to do when we're trying to build each other
Speaker 1: up and I and I think, without knowing it, a
Speaker 1: lot of us beat each other down and it's it's
Speaker 1: it's hecky, and I think it's something that should probably
Speaker 1: stop even when we do it subconsciously where we don't
Speaker 1: know we're doing it, and I look down on other
Speaker 1: women not based on like what I've achieved that they haven't,
Speaker 1: or you know, something about me I think is better,
Speaker 1: you know, in terms of some kind of measure of
Speaker 1: what we call successful or important or significance. Like when
Speaker 1: I look down at somebody, it's because of their like
Speaker 1: their behavior and how they treat other people, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So if I'm like, oh, she's an asshole,
Speaker 1: you know, like she's not kind to people, she's selfish,
Speaker 1: she's rude, like, and that's what we should do this
Speaker 1: sort of thing. That Something that I have been struggling
Speaker 1: with since starting the show is I get really exhausted
Speaker 1: with women that hide their whole ship. And I think
Speaker 1: that's been something that's been misconstrued with me on the
Speaker 1: show because I'll say all the time, like, put these
Speaker 1: girls do this and they hide it into blah blah.
Speaker 1: Because I feel like, if I'm a girl that's sitting
Speaker 1: here putting myself on the line to make other women
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable, like I feel comfortable about what they feel,
Speaker 1: feel more comfortable and feel more accepted, I want like
Speaker 1: women to do the same. I think this is still
Speaker 1: going back to judging. I don't think that. I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't feel like every woman has to be open
Speaker 1: with their sexuality or how they get money or what
Speaker 1: they do behind. I think a lot of the people
Speaker 1: that we do UM get out of their shell are
Speaker 1: doing so with their partners, and they're glad to hear
Speaker 1: like minded people. But I don't think that just because
Speaker 1: we're openly talking about suck, you know, openly talking about sucking,
Speaker 1: did no I know what you're saying that I know
Speaker 1: what you're referencing to. I just feel like even if
Speaker 1: x X girl, or if we have an escort on
Speaker 1: the show who's openly talking about her experience as an escort,
Speaker 1: as we did with a future guest, that you guys
Speaker 1: will hear. I don't think that she's any better than
Speaker 1: a woman who doesn't, who does escorting and doesn't share
Speaker 1: this with the public or their friends. I think that
Speaker 1: you have the choice, UM, and it makes you no
Speaker 1: less whether you want to be open about your sexuality
Speaker 1: and how you make your money compared to another woman
Speaker 1: who wants may want to keep the sex. We're gonna
Speaker 1: get stuck on this it's fine. I just think it's
Speaker 1: the same thing. So we'll go ahead and get into
Speaker 1: our kick of the week. And um, actually I didn't
Speaker 1: want to address that though. Okay, okay, I'm not entirely clear.
Speaker 1: Aren't either of your points, you know? But I think
Speaker 1: I was like I was with you us, like I
Speaker 1: know what you're saying, no chin, And then I was like,
Speaker 1: I know what she's saying. Now I'm confused with what
Speaker 1: you're saying. But um, in terms of like women being free,
Speaker 1: like I you know, from much of my life, like
Speaker 1: this is really wild to me to see that I've
Speaker 1: been a feminist since I was like twelve or thirteen,
Speaker 1: you know, like I remember, I haven't remember my parents
Speaker 1: being like, well no, you know. Now they're all in
Speaker 1: and they call themselves that. But like, second, I just
Speaker 1: want to point out that they are both at the
Speaker 1: edge of their seat because there they are waiting to
Speaker 1: see who you agree with. I understand what Maddy's saying
Speaker 1: to I just think that Mandy isn't hearing me. I
Speaker 1: think they were. I think they were making two different points.
Speaker 1: We were. I think they were like I don't think
Speaker 1: that they were like That's why it sounds like we think.
Speaker 1: I don't think they. I think they were just like
Speaker 1: this is an apple and this is and if we
Speaker 1: all just embraced our sexuality, we wouldn't have women feeling
Speaker 1: ashamed for it. So I have so I do have
Speaker 1: a response to that, and I think it touches on
Speaker 1: what you were talking about too on some levels. So
Speaker 1: hopefully this is a good middle ground. So they're like,
Speaker 1: so because I had this feminist thing very early on,
Speaker 1: you know, I had I didn't have the best I
Speaker 1: didn't have a lot of relationships with boys and had
Speaker 1: crushes and stuff in terms of high school and even college,
Speaker 1: you know, just a little bit of sex and a
Speaker 1: lot of making now but not you know, I wasn't
Speaker 1: really going there yet. But when I was, I was
Speaker 1: really comfortable just talking about it and talking about my
Speaker 1: interests in it, you know, um in ways that a
Speaker 1: lot of my friends weren't, like I remember being in
Speaker 1: high school, and at this point we must have been
Speaker 1: pretty early in high school. Nobody allegedly because I'm sure
Speaker 1: someone I wasn't, you know, but allegedly nobody had performed
Speaker 1: oral section, right, and so all the other girls are
Speaker 1: talking out I'm never gonna do that. I'm never gonna
Speaker 1: do that, And somebody's kind of like, you know, only
Speaker 1: with my husband, blah blah blah. And I was the
Speaker 1: only one who was like, you know, guys, it's not
Speaker 1: that bad. I hadn't done it yet, but I'm just
Speaker 1: in there, like I think that's just part of sex,
Speaker 1: you know, Like, and I'm sure that most of them
Speaker 1: kind of like, yeah, they might have been a little
Speaker 1: grossed out by it, but I'm sure somewhere deep down
Speaker 1: they either all knew that they would do it eventually,
Speaker 1: some of them were probably really curious about it, if
Speaker 1: not really ready and excited to do it, and at
Speaker 1: least one of them probably had already done it, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. Um, but like we were at
Speaker 1: that point, this is what we were judged doing. You
Speaker 1: know that you're the girl who doesn't do those things.
Speaker 1: We know this when she sleeps, you know, she stopped
Speaker 1: the basketball team, so and so they you know, they
Speaker 1: ran a train on her. She went home with this one.
Speaker 1: Like at that point in our lives, the Slett shaming
Speaker 1: was like, you know, the virtue was being the hot
Speaker 1: girl who was sexy enough but who wasn't necessarily having
Speaker 1: sex with anyone or with many people, and so like
Speaker 1: there was when someone decides that's exactly and so that
Speaker 1: I don't use the word home or sledt, like I
Speaker 1: don't believe that homes exist, you know, Like I understand.
Speaker 1: It's taken me a while to kind of make peace
Speaker 1: with like like when the first slow walk happened, like
Speaker 1: way before Amber got into it, I remember it was
Speaker 1: kind of like online it was like black girls versus
Speaker 1: white girls and white girls, you know, the black girls
Speaker 1: were like weird, like fighting to be treated as for
Speaker 1: us to not get caught, like y'all are trying to
Speaker 1: reclaim slut and we're trying to be called by our
Speaker 1: names and so okay, so I'll tell you. So I
Speaker 1: think it's super cute and I do like it. And
Speaker 1: it took me. So this was years of me making
Speaker 1: because when people the whole pro ho and hope, you know,
Speaker 1: like whole ship, I'm like, but there's no such thing
Speaker 1: as a hole. We just do what we should be
Speaker 1: able to do what we want. Like, yeah, I think
Speaker 1: that the rule should just be be respectful of yourself,
Speaker 1: of whomever you're dealing with, you know, whether it's casual
Speaker 1: or serious, you know, be honest, be truthful, be be responsible,
Speaker 1: you know, like you don't have to tell like if
Speaker 1: you if you're actually fun, if you're if we're fun?
Speaker 1: Buddy's like, are you really my buddy? Are we friends?
Speaker 1: You know? I mean are the homie lover friend thing? Like?
Speaker 1: Are we actually friends? Or do we just fun? And
Speaker 1: those are two different relationships and they're both acceptable. But
Speaker 1: we're not gonna pretend like we're friends. Who you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, Like, don't let me if I if
Speaker 1: I'm having sex with you and my tire blows out,
Speaker 1: I should be able to call you, not because I
Speaker 1: think you're my man, but because I'm a human being
Speaker 1: with whom we share this experience. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: If you value me enough to to allow to to
Speaker 1: come inside of my body, you should care about my safety. Right,
Speaker 1: Maybe you're not the one to call and help, you know,
Speaker 1: come hang out with me just because I'm bored, because
Speaker 1: maybe that's not our relationship, but you should not. I
Speaker 1: shouldn't feel that you would let me out somewhere without
Speaker 1: a ride, or that you wouldn't make sure I got
Speaker 1: home safe, or that you wouldn't care if something happened
Speaker 1: to one of my parents, like you know, like, and
Speaker 1: I say this all the time and time to the
Speaker 1: college shoes and I'm like, only have sex with people
Speaker 1: who respect you, period, and that's also respecting your pleasure.
Speaker 1: So maybe our interactions are very limited to I'm not
Speaker 1: would never text him for a tire because that's not
Speaker 1: who he is. I'm only texting him. But even that,
Speaker 1: but even with that, does he care if you came that?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Like, when are you bringing
Speaker 1: this up? Because on an earlier episode, UM, I was
Speaker 1: uncomfortable with hearing the world word, and sometimes I still am.
Speaker 1: I have some insecurities with people thinking I'm a total
Speaker 1: horror right or saying these words to me. Sometimes it
Speaker 1: can feel uncomfortable with being called promis is because the
Speaker 1: definition was having sex with no remorse or something like that. Anybody.
Speaker 1: I remember my main point in that conversation that Mandy
Speaker 1: and I had was but I definitely established connections, and
Speaker 1: I think that's the key to wanting to make a
Speaker 1: horrible decision and keeping that respect there even for yourself.
Speaker 1: If I make that connection within two hours and we
Speaker 1: have sex, or if I make it in two months.
Speaker 1: I still want to make sure there is a ground
Speaker 1: level for respect. But that's what's kept me from feeling
Speaker 1: confident in the decisions I made, whether real, horrible and
Speaker 1: skanky or not. You know what I'm saying. I haven't
Speaker 1: had a like a train or because people love to
Speaker 1: use his word train or male male females. But I
Speaker 1: want to make sure that when I do, both of
Speaker 1: these men respect me enough. And I want to get
Speaker 1: have two dicks slapping across my face. And I think
Speaker 1: that's why I think the name of the podcast is
Speaker 1: super cute. And I'm just like, you know what they
Speaker 1: speak about things, not just you out, but just like
Speaker 1: and there's plenty of women. It's not necessarily and aged thing,
Speaker 1: you know, Like there are plenty of women who are
Speaker 1: just like, yeah, I'm doing a whole show, you know,
Speaker 1: blah blah blah. And they've reclaimed it and so in
Speaker 1: the way that it ain't the first word we've reclaimed.
Speaker 1: And I know that, like black people, reclaiming the N
Speaker 1: word did not change how white folks felt about saying
Speaker 1: it to us about us. You know, all it did
Speaker 1: was make them mad that you know, we try to
Speaker 1: tell them that he used it. And by the way,
Speaker 1: we can't tell them, you know, we tell them all
Speaker 1: we want, but they still use it um, including the
Speaker 1: ones that will sit there and argue with you about
Speaker 1: like it's not fair that I can't they say that
Speaker 1: ship's but but I think that because I mean, being
Speaker 1: a nigger is not a real thing. It's a concept
Speaker 1: that they came out with. But being a hole, being
Speaker 1: a slut like those are not real things. And so
Speaker 1: I think the more that women just claim it, I
Speaker 1: do think that this these words have the path like
Speaker 1: that the power can be taken away. So you can't
Speaker 1: call me that. If somebody that was on a life show,
Speaker 1: I don't want to mention his name, but we don't
Speaker 1: know if he got into me and you or had
Speaker 1: this conversation with both of us. But he said, how
Speaker 1: can I not call you a hole? We're not your show.
Speaker 1: Me and Mandy had a competition who was the bigger
Speaker 1: home and we talked about little skinky things we did
Speaker 1: and who people got to vote at the end of
Speaker 1: yellow names who did the more hole ship, most hoh ship.
Speaker 1: And he said that why can't I say it? And
Speaker 1: to me it reverts back to like you choose what
Speaker 1: I want you to say. Do white people are they
Speaker 1: allowed to call this nig because they listen to this
Speaker 1: in musical time? And what's your intention in calling me that?
Speaker 1: Are you saying it like, yes, bitch, you better be
Speaker 1: on your hole ship? Are you calling me? Are you
Speaker 1: looking down it? It's like that video when the girl
Speaker 1: said bitch in different ways, by bitch exactly mean it's
Speaker 1: a different thing. And I had this actual this conversation UM,
Speaker 1: because we have this show UM and we call, you know,
Speaker 1: our listeners the whore hive, and we make fun of
Speaker 1: the word UM. I had this issue. And I hate
Speaker 1: to bring him up again, but Um Tahoe, who has
Speaker 1: been on this show quite a couple of times. I
Speaker 1: went on his show and he kind of introduced me
Speaker 1: as oh and afterward I had a problem with it
Speaker 1: because it's just like for you to introduce me to
Speaker 1: an audience in that way when I'm someone that you know,
Speaker 1: that you call for advice, that you ask for business decisions,
Speaker 1: and so to kind of belittle me as a person
Speaker 1: to just this is a hole that's coming on the show.
Speaker 1: And that's my problem because I can do I can
Speaker 1: suck dick. I can have sex. And that's kind of
Speaker 1: why we like to mention that we're two women in
Speaker 1: corporate America, because what you're not gonna do is demean
Speaker 1: me as a woman because of the choices that I
Speaker 1: make in the bedroom. When you know me as such
Speaker 1: is so much more. And that was my issue with
Speaker 1: him and even this is fat and it's funny because
Speaker 1: like one, that's why, And that was my issue with
Speaker 1: using the word period because I'm like, if we allow
Speaker 1: it to fester, you know what I mean, because I
Speaker 1: don't even like I would only use it to for
Speaker 1: to mail, you know, people of any gender that did
Speaker 1: fucked up stuff. So like he's cheating on his wife
Speaker 1: or you know she lied, you know something about deceptions,
Speaker 1: just something that like that to me is where more
Speaker 1: like deception, you know what I mean. Like I think
Speaker 1: it's okay, I like to sleep with three hundred people
Speaker 1: in three hundred days if you want to. But what
Speaker 1: my problem is with the one person cheese on their
Speaker 1: one partner one, you know what I mean, Like in
Speaker 1: an a in a long term affair and hides it
Speaker 1: to me, You're the bad guy, not the person who
Speaker 1: had a whole lot of sex. You know that the
Speaker 1: person who heard somebody um and willingly did and did
Speaker 1: it over and over and over and over again. Right,
Speaker 1: So I didn't say one person one time when I
Speaker 1: was like, no, like these people still don't know the
Speaker 1: comfortability and for what happened to you though I don't
Speaker 1: think he knew. I really don't believe he knew what
Speaker 1: your reaction to be because men don't understand and they
Speaker 1: haven't been getting enough. It's like men don't get what
Speaker 1: they can. I really don't think they knew how to
Speaker 1: treat us yet, so they don't and we don't require
Speaker 1: us to their fault, Alex. Alex is agreeing? Or are
Speaker 1: you disagreeing? Why do you disagree? Men were never sure
Speaker 1: all men? We never We don't. But when I heard it, right,
Speaker 1: when I heard it, I remember feeling like it wasn't
Speaker 1: that big of a deal. But I also couldn't say
Speaker 1: that because that's all how she takes it. Maybe I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have sat there and thought it was a big deal,
Speaker 1: but she took it that way, and that he was
Speaker 1: It sounds like he's implying something, you know, like he
Speaker 1: makes it. This is what bothers me. The stand like, yes,
Speaker 1: you call yourself that you have the podcast you talk
Speaker 1: about it, but like those same behaviors in a man
Speaker 1: would just be a guy who has a lot of sex, right,
Speaker 1: you know, so if you were to eat I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just I think that they know even if you
Speaker 1: claim it, there's still a level to which there's a
Speaker 1: thing that people just decided about you. Whether they affirm
Speaker 1: it or not, there's just the thing. And I for me,
Speaker 1: I just think that the stand like you, if you
Speaker 1: call yourself a home because you feel like your whole,
Speaker 1: you're a whole, then that's fine. But I would never
Speaker 1: call somebody that based on how much sex they have,
Speaker 1: because who am I to come? There's there's no like,
Speaker 1: where's the rule book? But it's what I mean, where's
Speaker 1: the standard? What's appropriate? What? We reviewed a girl jasel Marie,
Speaker 1: who is a leader of a stripper strike, and I
Speaker 1: believe I are you. I think it might have been
Speaker 1: me said, oh, we've got to strip her on she
Speaker 1: was I have an adult entertainer. Even though she called
Speaker 1: it the stripper strike. Um remember that, and like she
Speaker 1: stopped me and I remember, like, and I didn't want
Speaker 1: to be disrespectful, but I also thinking like, will you
Speaker 1: call it that and it's the same ship. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: think about it and exactly so, like the branding, I
Speaker 1: have the stripper on and I have been doing all
Speaker 1: this and leading the goddamn protests in March. Bitch, nah,
Speaker 1: that's how she Stripper Strike was a good like you know,
Speaker 1: adult like adults entertained or walk out. It's not going
Speaker 1: to have the same punches stripper strike, you know. Like,
Speaker 1: So I'm loving where all of this is going. And
Speaker 1: Alex looks like he wants to jump down. You really
Speaker 1: jump down. Let's take a quick I want to take
Speaker 1: a quick break and we'll be right back. Hey, guys.
Speaker 1: Today's show is sponsored by talk Space, the only online
Speaker 1: therapy company that lets you message a license therapist from
Speaker 1: anywhere anytime. By the way, any time I used talk
Speaker 1: space in the past, and I remember being really high.
Speaker 1: It's at three am at some party, and I went
Speaker 1: right in my email and I was like, thank god,
Speaker 1: she on the West coast. Bitch, I got some ship
Speaker 1: to say, I they are there for you. That means
Speaker 1: you can improve your mental even if you've got trouble
Speaker 1: making time for it in the past. Can't imagine fitting
Speaker 1: anything else to your life or with talk Space, it's
Speaker 1: as easy as sending them a message, get something off
Speaker 1: your chest whenever you need to. It feels like a
Speaker 1: text message. It's an amazing application to use UM. You
Speaker 1: could talk everyday challenges about work or home and these
Speaker 1: ancient as films or just life. You know there are
Speaker 1: no extra commutes, no leaveing the office, no judgment, do
Speaker 1: it from the comfort ready your own house. Remember, therapy
Speaker 1: isn't just about venting your innermost thoughts or digging into
Speaker 1: childhood memories. It's about practical and everyday strategies for stress
Speaker 1: managing and living a happier life. Having a therapist simply
Speaker 1: provides you with a designated person for you to talk
Speaker 1: to who is trained to listen and helps you make
Speaker 1: positive changes. Somebody like Alex you know what I mean
Speaker 1: that intercepts between me and Vandy. That's what your therapists
Speaker 1: gonna do. They're gonna intercepting your bullshit. The talk space
Speaker 1: platform has over two thousand license therapists who are experiences
Speaker 1: and addressing and interdressing life challenges we all face. When
Speaker 1: I use talk Space, I was able to say whether
Speaker 1: I wanted a man or a woman, and they can
Speaker 1: match you with the perfect therapist for the fraction of
Speaker 1: topics um and for the price of traditional therapy. So
Speaker 1: if you want to get in on this go to
Speaker 1: talk space dot com slash Decisions. Use the code decisions
Speaker 1: to get forty five dollars off your first month and
Speaker 1: show your support for this show. Since y'all loved this
Speaker 1: ship so much, your therapists That's Decisions at talk space
Speaker 1: dot com slash Decisions. This episode is also brought to
Speaker 1: you by Road Microphones, the official microphone of the Loudspeakers Network.
Speaker 1: That's right, once again, we are signed to the Loudspeaker Network, y'all.
Speaker 1: Since building our studio, we teamed up with Road because
Speaker 1: we wanted the best in microphones, and Road offers professional
Speaker 1: broadcast quality mics. We have been using the Road Procaster
Speaker 1: now for a few months and the audio quality is amazing.
Speaker 1: I know we've been going up and down. You guys
Speaker 1: sometimes say we're too loud, then you guys say we're
Speaker 1: too low. Well, now hopefully that's not a problem going forward.
Speaker 1: We told Alex he got to speak up. It's all
Speaker 1: gonna be fine. You guys are now gonna hear Alex
Speaker 1: moving forward because now he knows how to speak into
Speaker 1: the road microphone. UM to get more in for patient
Speaker 1: on the Road to podcast. That sounds like an advertisement,
Speaker 1: sounds like a roast. What it's not a roast, Bro,
Speaker 1: I'm just saying we have new microphones, bro to get
Speaker 1: to get more information on the road prodcaster and roads
Speaker 1: other microphones. Go to road dot com. That's r O
Speaker 1: d E dot com. Take your podcast to the next
Speaker 1: level with road And now back to the show. If
Speaker 1: you guys haven't noticed yet, UM, this episode the Horrible
Speaker 1: Decision is feminism. So we kind of like jumped right
Speaker 1: into the motherfucking topic with UM kind of how we
Speaker 1: feel about the word horror and UM one thing that
Speaker 1: I wanted to get into. And we'll just added into
Speaker 1: our horrible decision because normally what we do is we
Speaker 1: add we have kinks. UM every week we do a
Speaker 1: kink of the week, and this week with feminism, and
Speaker 1: and I had to do a little what is feminism? First?
Speaker 1: Can you tell us what a feminist is? Yeah, a
Speaker 1: feminist is a person who believes that all genders are equal.
Speaker 1: A feminist, yes, you're a feminist? Are a lot of
Speaker 1: people We'll say things like oh feminists, so can we
Speaker 1: explain how this is not going to be a male
Speaker 1: bashing and why where where's that misconception coming from? Because
Speaker 1: it'll lead into where we're from, you know, I mean,
Speaker 1: feminism exist, and there's lots of different types of feminism, right.
Speaker 1: Think of feminism as marijuana, you know, like there's a
Speaker 1: sativa and there's an end, because there's different feminism. There's
Speaker 1: white feminist, yes, so there's white feminism. There's you know, um,
Speaker 1: there's first wave feminism and second wave feminism, and there's
Speaker 1: you know, radical feminily, there's just lots of what kind
Speaker 1: would you say that you align with? I mean I
Speaker 1: tend to just use the you know, the phrase black feminists,
Speaker 1: you know, black feminist thought, um, which does have a
Speaker 1: whole history and a trajectory and really, you know, I
Speaker 1: won't get to to too walky and all that stuff here,
Speaker 1: but you know, like people have done serious work fleshing
Speaker 1: out these ideas thinking about how we relate to men,
Speaker 1: to the world around us two people of other races,
Speaker 1: and have written brilliant things and explain things very plainly,
Speaker 1: you know, but at the heart of it, you know,
Speaker 1: when you think about black feminism. It's advocating for the
Speaker 1: needs and concerns of black women and girls and black
Speaker 1: queer people with the same level of commitment and energy
Speaker 1: that we give to black men and boys, you know,
Speaker 1: and also recognize it the ways that you can be
Speaker 1: oppressed and you can be an oppressor, and that's not
Speaker 1: limited to straight black men like you know. But but
Speaker 1: but when it comes to when you think about black
Speaker 1: feminism and something now that you're talking about that I
Speaker 1: want to dig into with you. Yeah. Actually, before we
Speaker 1: get into the notes, UM, I wanted to play a
Speaker 1: a video real quick. UM. And this is from Freedman.
Speaker 1: What she does is, UM, she talks about how feminism
Speaker 1: actually um related to men and how it kind of
Speaker 1: yielded men into going into being more feminine with themselves
Speaker 1: and that if that makes sense, as well as the
Speaker 1: topic of hypermasculinity. So I'm gonna play the video. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna put the audio in. UM. So if you guys
Speaker 1: want to take listen, I'm gonna play that real quick
Speaker 1: and check it out. In my opinion, the other half
Speaker 1: of the woman of the Revolution, the other half of
Speaker 1: women's liberation movement, is the boys in my country and
Speaker 1: in yours wearing their hair long, you know. And those
Speaker 1: boys who are wearing their hair long are saying no
Speaker 1: to the mask and mystique. They are saying no to
Speaker 1: that brutal, sadistic, tight lip crew cut you know, Prussian
Speaker 1: big muscle you know, or just turn having away, uh
Speaker 1: kill bears when there are no bears to kill, and
Speaker 1: and and ny palm all the children in Vietnam, Cambodia,
Speaker 1: to prove that I'm a man, you know, and be
Speaker 1: dominant and superior to everyone concerned and never show any
Speaker 1: any softness. Well, these boys that are wearing their hair
Speaker 1: long are saying no, I don't have to be all
Speaker 1: that crew cut and tight lipped. Um. I don't have
Speaker 1: to be dominant and superior to anyone. I don't have
Speaker 1: to have big muscles because there aren't any bears to kill.
Speaker 1: I don't have to you know, kill anybody to prove anything.
Speaker 1: I can be tender, and I can be sensitive, and
Speaker 1: I can be compassionate, and I can admit sometimes that
Speaker 1: I'm afraid, and I can even cry. And I am
Speaker 1: a man, and I am my own man. And that
Speaker 1: man who is strong enough to be general, that is
Speaker 1: a new man. And he is the other half of
Speaker 1: this revolution, and he will live longer. I mean, really,
Speaker 1: what I had that I wanted to ask you? I
Speaker 1: wanted to talk about the biggest feminist contradictions that men
Speaker 1: think that we have. I went to Women's March and um,
Speaker 1: I can't remember what my sign said, but some guy
Speaker 1: was like, oh, what about the rest of us? So
Speaker 1: here's the things that I think are the top three
Speaker 1: that people talk to it about for men. We're talking
Speaker 1: still talking about men with feminism? Okay, um, paying for meals? Right,
Speaker 1: I want to let's start with that one first. Why
Speaker 1: do men feel like because we're feminists? This is way
Speaker 1: off from what I thought it was going to be. Well,
Speaker 1: I mean, I didn't see the video, but here's we talked.
Speaker 1: I hear about it on a lot of podcasts that
Speaker 1: of us and two guys, Oh, if you're such a feminist,
Speaker 1: why do I have to do this for you? Blah
Speaker 1: blah blah? How does that? How does it affect our
Speaker 1: our daily lives? That? How do we how do we
Speaker 1: put feminism into dating and chivalry and things like that.
Speaker 1: It's it's much easier than you know. I think a
Speaker 1: lot of people believe and I think that a lot
Speaker 1: of those misconceptions or you know, that's hypocritical, and that's yes,
Speaker 1: a lot of it is. There's contradictions, right, Like, I
Speaker 1: don't know if hypocritical is fair. But and sometimes you know,
Speaker 1: you can be a feminist and you can be a hypocrite.
Speaker 1: You know, you can talk one thing and walk another.
Speaker 1: But like, feminism doesn't mean that a woman and a
Speaker 1: man in a relationship have to do the same things
Speaker 1: and carry the same burdens and and move the same
Speaker 1: way and have the same you know, patterns of behavior
Speaker 1: and responsibilities. It says that both sides aren't equal. Now,
Speaker 1: equal does not mean that we have the same skill
Speaker 1: set or the same interest, just that our value is
Speaker 1: the same. Right. And so if I'm start a body,
Speaker 1: I'm terrible with math, budgeting, Like I'm very you know,
Speaker 1: I love to shop and stuff, you know, and I
Speaker 1: can be very frugal and I can be you know, uh,
Speaker 1: what's the way I can be you know, frugal, But
Speaker 1: I'm not somebody who should be balancing the family you know, checkbook,
Speaker 1: right if there's myself and another adult, like I'm just
Speaker 1: that's not my strong suit. I like to cook. I'm
Speaker 1: not super great at clean Like cleaning is not my jam,
Speaker 1: So like I have somebody come clean my house, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. So Like, if I'm in a
Speaker 1: relationship with a man and I cook every meal that
Speaker 1: we eat, it's not because I should not cook all
Speaker 1: of our meals because I'm a woman. If I cook
Speaker 1: all our meals, it should be because I'm the best
Speaker 1: cook and I enjoy doing it, or I'm the one
Speaker 1: who has the time to do it, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. If it's just and I'm the best cook,
Speaker 1: I still need to Okay, I'm the best cooking. Is
Speaker 1: that I mean that I like doing it? Does that
Speaker 1: mean that I have time? And the reason that because
Speaker 1: we were talking about man man thinking we're bashing them,
Speaker 1: but it's like, okay, well this thing ain't clean up
Speaker 1: the house. If you're a feminist, won't like well, you know,
Speaker 1: I think that men and women who are who don't
Speaker 1: know a lot about feminism are very quick to kind
Speaker 1: of throw it back in your face because it makes
Speaker 1: them uncomfortable, you know, because it does say no, it's
Speaker 1: not about bashing man or hating man. It's not about
Speaker 1: not spending time with them or cutting them all off
Speaker 1: or canceling them or calling them all problematic. But it
Speaker 1: is about confronting certain privileges that they have that are
Speaker 1: not deserved, and certain behaviors that they are apt to to,
Speaker 1: you know, perform certain things that they're likely you know,
Speaker 1: are allowed to do that are not good for us
Speaker 1: or for themselves. Right, And so to the to what
Speaker 1: she was talking about in the clip. You know, and
Speaker 1: Betty free Dan is one of the most well known
Speaker 1: kind of feminist thinkers, uh in history. But I will say,
Speaker 1: and she certainly said some some things in her work
Speaker 1: that was very you know, that was powerful and correct.
Speaker 1: But I didn't get my game from my feminist game
Speaker 1: from white women like that, you know, like that, that's
Speaker 1: not where I look to to kind of like shape
Speaker 1: it for me. It was Bell Hooks, it was Unlesta
Speaker 1: Harris Perry, it was John Morgan. You know, these are
Speaker 1: black women. UM and on some level Alice Walker it Now.
Speaker 1: Can I ask you real quick because UM, I feel
Speaker 1: like that's kind of similar to what we just talked about,
Speaker 1: even um talking about the whole hierarchy. UM. When you
Speaker 1: talk about women empowerment, UM, I like to think that
Speaker 1: we're talking about all women, And I don't want to
Speaker 1: all lives matter this thing at all, but um, why
Speaker 1: not uplift the Latino women and the white women? And
Speaker 1: why is it that we talk about white feminists and
Speaker 1: black feminists and we're all women and we all have
Speaker 1: fought the same oppression. Um well, maybe not in all
Speaker 1: areas of course, black women having um to deal with
Speaker 1: the slavery aspect of oppression as well. And I'm just
Speaker 1: speaking it from an all women aspects. So why is
Speaker 1: feminism even divided when we all kind of want to
Speaker 1: do better as well as so, you know, when black
Speaker 1: what the work of black feminism does actually does advocate
Speaker 1: for all women. However, what it does not advocate for
Speaker 1: us for white women to continue to have the unearned
Speaker 1: privilege that they have not just as white people, but
Speaker 1: as white women in particular, and so how they are
Speaker 1: able in the workplace, in social settings, you know, and beyond,
Speaker 1: to have undue influence over the lives of black women
Speaker 1: and girls right the way that you know, you could
Speaker 1: have a white female colleague just as light as you are,
Speaker 1: you know, and you could be talking to each other
Speaker 1: and the same, you know, the same tone of voice,
Speaker 1: the same you know, volume, and she could very easily
Speaker 1: just start crying and say you've intimidated her, and it
Speaker 1: is going to be in good luck to you trying
Speaker 1: to prove otherwise. You know, there are more Latino women
Speaker 1: in this country than I mean Latino people that there
Speaker 1: are black pent of the population I think for multiracial blacks.
Speaker 1: So we're already tiny. Why can't we have a group
Speaker 1: that shouts out and that leads with that? Right? Exactly,
Speaker 1: a lot of Latino women are black too, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean? So the one the ones who identify
Speaker 1: as black, I've been and there's so many of them.
Speaker 1: There's always been so many of them. They've always been
Speaker 1: part of black feminist and you know, like that's that's
Speaker 1: not new, that that's you know, something we talk about
Speaker 1: more because we're better at talking about intersectionality, right, which
Speaker 1: is having realized black feminism though as women of color period.
Speaker 1: In my mind, you know what, it's it's interesting, So,
Speaker 1: I um, there are ways so obviously white women have
Speaker 1: power and privilege over women of color that you know,
Speaker 1: we don't have over them, and in certain situations, other
Speaker 1: women of color can have anti blackness fuel so much,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, that you can have somebody
Speaker 1: who's from you know, who does not have much, you know,
Speaker 1: but has the and and they're not white. But what
Speaker 1: they do have is that they're not black, and that
Speaker 1: they can look at us like niggers too, you know.
Speaker 1: And so that does come into play when you're talking
Speaker 1: about women of color and feminism. I think, in general,
Speaker 1: have women of color been better with each other than
Speaker 1: white women have been to us? Absolutely? Is their coalition building,
Speaker 1: is their multicultural feminists, you know, work being done, Yes,
Speaker 1: and plenty of us black feminists I have relationships with
Speaker 1: white women and white feminists organizations of publications. Not about
Speaker 1: saying all over here, me over here, but it's about
Speaker 1: we need to call a thing a thing. And so
Speaker 1: white women have been able to dominate the conversation of
Speaker 1: what it means to be a woman or what it
Speaker 1: means to be a feminist, even if you're not a feminist.
Speaker 1: What it means to be a woman in so many
Speaker 1: ways has been defined by white womanhood. When you talk
Speaker 1: about blackness, so much that has been defined by black malehood, right,
Speaker 1: And so we exist at the intersection of both of
Speaker 1: these oppressions, and these people, like our closest allies you
Speaker 1: would think should be women, you know, white women and
Speaker 1: women of other races, and black men. But white women
Speaker 1: and black and black men in particular have this unique
Speaker 1: ability to be Black men are our brothers, but in
Speaker 1: some ways they can also be our oppressors. White women,
Speaker 1: we don't have that feeling of sisterhood to them, which
Speaker 1: makes it even more complicated. Right, so it's easy to
Speaker 1: throw It's easier for many of us to throw white
Speaker 1: women away than it is to throw black men away.
Speaker 1: And I'm not saying that we should by far, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. But it's like to be to
Speaker 1: feel betrayed, you know. But when you're feeling betrayal over
Speaker 1: you're talking about ways that you know they have power
Speaker 1: over us. No, I haven't had a lot of white women,
Speaker 1: especially in the workplace, treat me good. I Actually, it's funny.
Speaker 1: A lot of people will sometimes make comments to me,
Speaker 1: not really if they're a listener of the show, because
Speaker 1: they get me. But some people say like, oh, you're
Speaker 1: only half white, why you be acting like them? Or
Speaker 1: you're only half flack while you act like that, and um,
Speaker 1: in the workplace, I've had instances where I'm ready to
Speaker 1: go off. I call it my black out moments. And
Speaker 1: I've had black women at work tell me and in
Speaker 1: corporate America like, good, you're going to make us look crazy.
Speaker 1: Even when these white girls were sitting in my face
Speaker 1: like well you know, she was really like, you know,
Speaker 1: a cross stuff with my sale and like she did
Speaker 1: them and just just like what she was saying earlier
Speaker 1: when we were talking about man, I just wish people
Speaker 1: just like let your house ship out, like where are
Speaker 1: you hiding? It's like those women, more often than not,
Speaker 1: they knew just as well that those other black women,
Speaker 1: the same way that you knew that what went down
Speaker 1: was wrong, they knew it too, but they put on
Speaker 1: that mask. They put it out like there's certain things
Speaker 1: I'd be like just looking at like look at your podcast,
Speaker 1: your tattoos, how your dressed, Like there are things that
Speaker 1: you're just like, yes, I'm in corporate America, but corporate
Speaker 1: America does not define me. And I can find success
Speaker 1: and happiness in other parts of my life too, And
Speaker 1: there are people that are like, you know, the only
Speaker 1: thing I know is this is this, And if you
Speaker 1: hate this away from me, how do I land in
Speaker 1: another space? Like that? So you could lose your corporate job,
Speaker 1: God forbid, and maybe have two podcasts within the span
Speaker 1: of a week. They're like, Okay, well, if I'm not
Speaker 1: working here, I gotta work at another here. And if
Speaker 1: I pop up on somebody, I'm done. But you're you're
Speaker 1: bringing up a lot of work. And I wanted to
Speaker 1: even tie Alex into this if I can, because reading
Speaker 1: a lot of feminist a lot of feminist tweets and
Speaker 1: what they stand for, a lot of it does geared
Speaker 1: toward the I don't need a man. I I work,
Speaker 1: I make money. I can do what you can do.
Speaker 1: What anything you can do, I can do better. There
Speaker 1: was a whole thing in the nineteen fifties about that
Speaker 1: and having the women empowerment UM thing. And I want
Speaker 1: to know if you feel like that is hurting women
Speaker 1: UM right now? And I say that to say, like
Speaker 1: a lot of men now are expecting women to split
Speaker 1: the bills. We're now doing the splitting dates, conversation on
Speaker 1: who pays the date um, and now you have these
Speaker 1: overly independent women. Is it hurting the And I don't
Speaker 1: want to relate it back to patriarchy, but we did
Speaker 1: have a comment um. We had a b K chat episode,
Speaker 1: Me and Weasy kind of went in on her because
Speaker 1: she pretty much said her pussy was all she needed
Speaker 1: to bring to the table, and Me and Weasy kind
Speaker 1: of brought in the whole well, you don't cook, you
Speaker 1: don't clean, and people were like, I can't believe Weasy
Speaker 1: and Mandy are sitting here bringing up you know, because
Speaker 1: she had a bigger point than that, and it it
Speaker 1: took me a few weeks to realize that her point
Speaker 1: was like, I got pussy, I don't have to do
Speaker 1: all this ship to keep this nigga, And she was right,
Speaker 1: And what do what do I? And I take a
Speaker 1: lot of those things that I said to her back
Speaker 1: because I really didn't I should have listened to the
Speaker 1: whole clip. What what do you think, um, Alex Like,
Speaker 1: as far as the feminist movement and women empowerment and
Speaker 1: what we're doing and standing, is it kind of hurting
Speaker 1: us in terms of dating and what men expect from
Speaker 1: us and maybe this equality that we're speaking of, if
Speaker 1: it's kind of hurting us in the long run or
Speaker 1: making y'all less of what y'all need to be a
Speaker 1: k amen, I wouldn't say it hurts you in any way. Actually, Um,
Speaker 1: every person is different, men or women, so their expectations
Speaker 1: are different as well. Me. Um, I guess you would
Speaker 1: say a little bit more classic. I'm used to paying
Speaker 1: when I go out to dinner, but when I've been
Speaker 1: in long term relationships after a while, there may be
Speaker 1: sometimes where it's like, hey, she'll treat me for this time.
Speaker 1: But it's just not always, you know, and I like
Speaker 1: when it happens, but if it didn't happen, I wouldn't
Speaker 1: look down upon her or whatever. But I like a nice, strong,
Speaker 1: independent woman. That's cool, like I just it isn't different, interesting,
Speaker 1: super attractive when we talk about, like, you know, an
Speaker 1: independent woman versus a woman who's not independent, Like the
Speaker 1: numbers show that most of us, at the at least
Speaker 1: intended period of time in our lives are independent, So
Speaker 1: you don't have to put a bow on in our
Speaker 1: I don't talk about like as an independent woman, like yeah,
Speaker 1: I have a good job. I'm an adult, you know,
Speaker 1: I have responsibility to take care of like it's it's
Speaker 1: it's And I was not born into a community where
Speaker 1: I could take for granted that I could work around
Speaker 1: and figure things out that one day I'm going to
Speaker 1: marry somebody who makes over six figures and we'll have
Speaker 1: two kids, you know, a pick offense and a dog.
Speaker 1: But that's just not reality for you know, for for
Speaker 1: people in urban locations, let alone just black polter. I
Speaker 1: wanted to for a long time. And the more and
Speaker 1: more money I make, yeah, I don't think I'm gonna
Speaker 1: with my new job, I'm not gonna. It's gonna be
Speaker 1: very difficult for me to meet someone that makes more
Speaker 1: money to me. And I realized how that sounds like
Speaker 1: I'm boasting, but it really is me having to knock
Speaker 1: myself down to pig to say, bitch, chill the funk out,
Speaker 1: like but and that's fine. I just I don't know,
Speaker 1: like I don't think one when I think of feminism,
Speaker 1: I'm not thinking about like paying for days, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, Like, I just think we have so
Speaker 1: much bigger friendly, like we gotta teach, Yeah, we gotta,
Speaker 1: we gotta teach, we gotta teach. I do the performative.
Speaker 1: You know. It's funny. I when out with somebody who
Speaker 1: was a little bit older and not too long ago,
Speaker 1: and I didn't do I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: since you over forty starry and I don't usually date
Speaker 1: older man and I'm like, I'm not even going to
Speaker 1: pretend to reach, you know, with a guy who's younger
Speaker 1: at my age, I'll do the kind of like I'm
Speaker 1: not pretending to reach because I don't need you thinking
Speaker 1: the next time you go out on page, appreciate it
Speaker 1: fake reach. The guys know it's fake, but it's still
Speaker 1: a nice gesture, you know. I think it's a stilly gesture.
Speaker 1: I think that one when the bill come I'm looking
Speaker 1: at my phone. Hey, I'm not feeling too good. Can
Speaker 1: you want me to bring you something? You better not
Speaker 1: tell me to come up doing with some soup? But
Speaker 1: you know you need but you're not. But like I
Speaker 1: really do want, Like when we think about feminism, Look,
Speaker 1: me and you we hang out every week. And if
Speaker 1: I got sick and you were like, literally, I can
Speaker 1: I covering you some ship, I'd be like, no, why
Speaker 1: am I going inconvenience you? And if you asked me
Speaker 1: to do it and come all the way to Queen's,
Speaker 1: I'm costing you out, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: but we're friends. I'm talking about it. I was dating
Speaker 1: somebody so real quick. I want to go ahead. Before
Speaker 1: we go, I want to get into a homemail real quick.
Speaker 1: While we're talking about women, women, women and women. I
Speaker 1: thought that this was quite a funny. Um. A lot
Speaker 1: of that we got in, and I think that we
Speaker 1: could probably give her some good advice. It says, hey, girls,
Speaker 1: love your podcast. Listening to you guys keeps my ass saying.
Speaker 1: I'm a woman and I am in a committed relationship
Speaker 1: with another woman. I have had many men and have
Speaker 1: fucked many women. However, she was the first girl I
Speaker 1: have ever actually dated. I am the happiest I have
Speaker 1: ever been with her. It's been two years, and frankly,
Speaker 1: I missed the dick. The toys are just not doing
Speaker 1: it anymore. I am seriously at a loss because I
Speaker 1: love her to death and I am really happy. But man,
Speaker 1: I miss being dicked down by a man. What do
Speaker 1: I do? Thank you? By the way, this was titled
Speaker 1: my heart wants the pussy, but my pussy wants the dick.
Speaker 1: So is a girlfriend lesbian? Yes? Okay, open relationship? You
Speaker 1: think you know my advice is gonna be open relationship
Speaker 1: ship all day every day? I think, um, yeah, so
Speaker 1: I think especially wanting to when you crave someone else. Right.
Speaker 1: When I was with my ex, the one that I
Speaker 1: talked about like left me for Jesus, one of the
Speaker 1: things he said to me was like, I hate seeing
Speaker 1: you with other women. Like we had three somethings together,
Speaker 1: and he's like, I love you, I don't want to
Speaker 1: share you. And that's when I knew that open relationships
Speaker 1: is gonna be my thing, because I am truly bisexual,
Speaker 1: and I really believe that if you keep holding out
Speaker 1: like you love, it's only gonna take you so far
Speaker 1: if your sexual desires are When I was in Miami,
Speaker 1: I dated a girl UM and she treated me so good.
Speaker 1: I say to this day, she probably treated me better
Speaker 1: than any guy did UM and we actually had the
Speaker 1: agreement that I could keep sucking Jordan's. She knew that
Speaker 1: that was the guy that I enjoyed being with, and
Speaker 1: so she literally we set those guidelines like Okay, I'm
Speaker 1: the only girl that you can deal with, and he's
Speaker 1: the only guy that you can deal with outside of me.
Speaker 1: And I thought that as someone who wanted a relationship
Speaker 1: with me, that she allowed me to express that I
Speaker 1: still needed Dick in my life even though we did
Speaker 1: the whole strop. I mean, trust me, it's an ego,
Speaker 1: Bruce for someone to tell you that you can't satisfy
Speaker 1: me in a certain way, And I can only imagine
Speaker 1: how inadequate that other person may feel. But if you're
Speaker 1: thinking about either stepping out and it's something you really needs,
Speaker 1: you're already. If you're thinking about it, you're already teen.
Speaker 1: It sounds it sounds like it's more to it than
Speaker 1: just the feeling of you know, it's the connection with him.
Speaker 1: It's the connection with the man because she's getting she said,
Speaker 1: the toys just aren't doing it, And to me, that's
Speaker 1: the penetration. I think it's definitely a body, actually more
Speaker 1: than it's like the when I'm sleeping with a woman
Speaker 1: and a man, I don't necessarily miss the other. But
Speaker 1: I will say this much, when I'm with a woman,
Speaker 1: the next thing that I'm excited for with a man
Speaker 1: is his really random, but it's his sweat and his
Speaker 1: chest and his arms, or like his thighs, how big
Speaker 1: they are. When I start craving a woman, it's like breast,
Speaker 1: it's hair, it's the smells, different thing, it's the different things.
Speaker 1: So it's not necessarily that he can't give me this
Speaker 1: smell of pussy that I missed. But there are certain
Speaker 1: things that you crave, and I really don't think it
Speaker 1: means that you don't love that person. No, it's interesting
Speaker 1: I've heard, you know, because so I've heard so many
Speaker 1: bisexual people, you know, talk about like, I hate that
Speaker 1: people think we can't be monogamous, because we can. But
Speaker 1: I also think that like what I don't think. I
Speaker 1: don't think it's necessarily bi sexuality that makes it impossible
Speaker 1: for people to be I think it's just that who
Speaker 1: that that person is just not wired for that are
Speaker 1: interested in it because you could, like straight people are
Speaker 1: not that good in monogamy the way they you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, So that Tomson, Kevin Hard So I think,
Speaker 1: what what, what's the problem? We can't call our n
Speaker 1: don't right? We takes getting away because because men cheat,
Speaker 1: they all cheat, Thank you black Mann. I don't like
Speaker 1: that that joke was funny for like two weeks. It was.
Speaker 1: It was funny for one minute, it was funny for
Speaker 1: one Anyways, I wanted to go ahead before we wrap up,
Speaker 1: where can our listeners find you? I feel like there
Speaker 1: was so much that we did not get to motherfucking
Speaker 1: get on. But we're gonna have to add that in
Speaker 1: another time. I'm gonna give you the super brief just
Speaker 1: like if you if I'm the first feminist you guys
Speaker 1: that you ever heard not YouTube like listeners, hey listeners,
Speaker 1: if you never heard of a feminist who wasn't just like,
Speaker 1: because there's Twitter feminism and I'm just and then there's
Speaker 1: like the form, there's the feminism that lives offline and
Speaker 1: that's not like I know, and people comes right, and
Speaker 1: so the thing is, it's kind of like somebody getting
Speaker 1: really excited about healthy eating, right, Like you know what
Speaker 1: if you know the differences? Someone said to me, and
Speaker 1: I really appreciated this woman said it to me. I
Speaker 1: was at a Christmas party. Sorry, I want to make
Speaker 1: the short, and I had half of the room divided.
Speaker 1: She said to me, That's how I know you're real
Speaker 1: about your ship because you knew Niggs was gonna get
Speaker 1: pissed and you knew conversations was gonna be uncomfortable, and
Speaker 1: you still did it. That's fucking that's protesting, that's Black
Speaker 1: Lives Matter ship, that's everything you really talking that ship,
Speaker 1: And I think people people that don't like it, and yeah,
Speaker 1: you have some other people and not gonna like it,
Speaker 1: but you're also not saying it because you know people
Speaker 1: are gonna like it. You know, like there are a
Speaker 1: lot of folks to just say things for shock value,
Speaker 1: you know, saying anim today. And I'm like, every time
Speaker 1: I know everybody's gonna be you know, then not everybody,
Speaker 1: but every time I know that a bunch of men
Speaker 1: are gonna be mad, you know, if it's our Kelly
Speaker 1: or Bill Cosby, it's like, be mad. This is not
Speaker 1: my problem, this is your problem. Purpose. What do you
Speaker 1: think your main purposes before we wrap up, Like, for feminism,
Speaker 1: what do you want the most? The most? I want
Speaker 1: us to be empowered. I want us to feel free.
Speaker 1: I want us to be happy. I want us to
Speaker 1: have orgasms if we sell choose. I want us to
Speaker 1: be able to do the things that we like to
Speaker 1: do with the people we like to do them with.
Speaker 1: I want us to have healthy, loving relationships with whomever,
Speaker 1: you know, and I want us to be respected by
Speaker 1: our men, you know. And I'm like, I don't care
Speaker 1: if you're a black man who only dates white women
Speaker 1: who dates I mean, even though I do think we
Speaker 1: get that. If you only date people who are not
Speaker 1: like you, then yes, I do have to have some
Speaker 1: serious questions for you. But if you're somebody who dates,
Speaker 1: you know, all types of women of all types of
Speaker 1: craze and colors, sometimes black, sometimes whatever, and you end
Speaker 1: up marrying or you know, having children with somebody else,
Speaker 1: I don't think that means that you don't love or
Speaker 1: you have to. Yeah, but like what I judge that
Speaker 1: on is like do you love and respect black women?
Speaker 1: You know? For if you're a black woman who's done that,
Speaker 1: do you love and respect black men? Do you still
Speaker 1: have black male you're black female friends in your life,
Speaker 1: people who you can call in and who can call
Speaker 1: on you. Are you gonna show up for us? It's
Speaker 1: not about who you go home with, It's about like
Speaker 1: your relationships to us, you know? Do you you see
Speaker 1: us as less than these other women? Do you think
Speaker 1: of us as only what we can do for you,
Speaker 1: how we can help you, how we can support you
Speaker 1: know and you women? And it's interesting because Abron said
Speaker 1: that and people were mad at him, but like, yeah,
Speaker 1: he said, he said, Keyene is a hug from a
Speaker 1: black you know, he needs a black woman hug or
Speaker 1: black on a hugging or something you out and so
Speaker 1: like in a lot of black women are like, no,
Speaker 1: we're done being your meals. We don't need to, you know,
Speaker 1: like or a man sucking up should not be a
Speaker 1: black woman's responsibility. And so I was torn because I
Speaker 1: was like I feel that too. You know, they were
Speaker 1: saying like they were like na brothers. He didn't told
Speaker 1: us who what he thinks of us. I M like,
Speaker 1: the whole Beyonce holds jay Z down, blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you something. She got three goddamn kids. Please.
Speaker 1: Jay Z is a grown ass man, and so is Kanye. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like I wouldn't say that. I didn't like that. I
Speaker 1: don't blame him. I'm like trying her best and you
Speaker 1: were out here with with chicks on chains and pimpings,
Speaker 1: so like you can't And that's the point. I think
Speaker 1: it's like we can't be responsible for the actions. However,
Speaker 1: I do wish that Kanye had black women surrounding him
Speaker 1: with love who he also can pour back into. So
Speaker 1: don't just call me when you need some help. This
Speaker 1: should be a black women who you know, like and
Speaker 1: I got and I've been producing records. But I remember
Speaker 1: him talking about Siana Taylor and how he sat on
Speaker 1: her record for too long. She's immensely talented. She should
Speaker 1: be a recording star. She should be you know, for
Speaker 1: for for a lot of these topics, and I know
Speaker 1: you talk about them on your Twitter, your Instagram. You
Speaker 1: post up where can our listeners catch you? Where can
Speaker 1: they find you? Drop the at name? Do you have
Speaker 1: a website? Drop all that information? Yes, it's on Twitter
Speaker 1: and Instagram is at jamilamu. UM. We'll go ahead and
Speaker 1: add that if I sat here and try to spell it,
Speaker 1: we will definitely drop that UM in the description of
Speaker 1: this bioble have it. We'll also have it when we
Speaker 1: post um the clip to Instagram, UM and everything. And
Speaker 1: I want to thank you so much for coming on.
Speaker 1: You were amazing. You had this show extra woke. I
Speaker 1: was just like, I know you don't like the work
Speaker 1: hell um, but yeah, I appreciate it. I hope that
Speaker 1: you guys enjoyed this episode. And for our patrons, what
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do is I'm gonna post um a couple
Speaker 1: of the feminists um sources that I found, including the
Speaker 1: video of the art of the audio that you guys
Speaker 1: heard on this episode, as well as some first sources
Speaker 1: um that are just really good to read up on
Speaker 1: the history of feminism. So I'll include that if you
Speaker 1: are a patron and the rest of y'all niggas um.
Speaker 1: In a few days, we're gonna be in a t L.
Speaker 1: You know, my period gonna be right off right and
Speaker 1: she wants to so um we hope to see you
Speaker 1: guys in the live show. Probably gonna be done working
Speaker 1: on himself that weekend. Oh he ready, that did gonna
Speaker 1: be slain? Wow? He taking in. He's all I'm anyway, guys,
Speaker 1: thank you so much. This has been yet another episode
Speaker 1: of horrible decisions by Bye