WEBVTT - Sam Acho

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<v Speaker 1>This is cut to it with Steve Smith Senior at

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<v Speaker 1>production of The Black Effect and I Heart Radio. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>Steve Smith Senior and I'm John and this is cut

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<v Speaker 1>to it. Good do it, Good do it. Let's getting

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<v Speaker 1>down to do it. Good do it. We asked the

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<v Speaker 1>questions you always want to know, but no one ever asked,

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<v Speaker 1>let's cut to it. You ain't heard them about it,

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<v Speaker 1>then we're about to let you know. It's all tell man,

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<v Speaker 1>don't tell me how the hamburgers made already already good,

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<v Speaker 1>We're good. What up? What's up? Man? What's up? Man?

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<v Speaker 1>Did you see that ass whooping the other night? I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not Shelly Shalli. I'm not dancing around it. We were

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<v Speaker 1>texting back and forth. We're supposed to hang out, but

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<v Speaker 1>we didn't get a chance to because with everything going

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<v Speaker 1>on with with with the pandemic, so we didn't get

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<v Speaker 1>a chance to. But we're texting back and forth. We're

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<v Speaker 1>talking about getting the fight. So we were both watching

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<v Speaker 1>simultaneously as you have to do now, and so, um,

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<v Speaker 1>I was excited just about seeing Mike Tyson fight, seeing

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<v Speaker 1>Roy Jones fight. Hold on, but why did Roy walk

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<v Speaker 1>in that thing like he had a hip hip replacement.

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<v Speaker 1>Roy was built like the appliants manager at like like,

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<v Speaker 1>of all the I don't know how much leaves they

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<v Speaker 1>had from the time that they announced this to the

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<v Speaker 1>fight that happening. But my mind is I don't know.

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<v Speaker 1>Both these guys in their fifties. Tyson's fifty four, Roy's

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<v Speaker 1>fifty one, so I understand that, and Roy looked fifty.

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<v Speaker 1>Look about here's what happened to Roy. Roy's like, I'm done.

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<v Speaker 1>They got this fight, and Roy try to use every

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<v Speaker 1>water peel, a golden seal, clean you up, and it

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<v Speaker 1>still didn't want that boy had he got hit with

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<v Speaker 1>the bad body pillow something like that's what you show

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<v Speaker 1>after all these weeks that we had from the time

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<v Speaker 1>that we announced the fight until now, that's that's the

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<v Speaker 1>body you show up with, Bob, Like what comes you

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<v Speaker 1>Catt now throws. But anyway, that's not even what we

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<v Speaker 1>really wanted to get into your card. Before Tyson and

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<v Speaker 1>we had Nate Robinson who was going against YouTube star

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<v Speaker 1>care what Jake Paul, I don't care where he was.

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<v Speaker 1>He could have been a YouTuber, he could have been

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<v Speaker 1>a drive through two fights. According to According to Paul,

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<v Speaker 1>he broke his nose and rolled out of bed and

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<v Speaker 1>whooped this ass. Well, the proofs in the pudding because

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<v Speaker 1>he definitely did listen. Here's the problem I have with Nate, right,

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<v Speaker 1>I think I'm mad Nate. I don't know. I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>in the business. I've squawped. But but we know everybody's like, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>Nate's trainer needs to be fired. Let me tell y'all something, people,

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<v Speaker 1>when did they start announcement? Nate did not listen or

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<v Speaker 1>at here to any of the training. Once that bell roll,

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<v Speaker 1>he was lungeon. He threw everything out through m what's

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<v Speaker 1>that bell rung? He just continued. Any type of advice,

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<v Speaker 1>any type of training, anything that he got from his training,

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<v Speaker 1>he didn't use. It. All went out the window, lunched in,

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<v Speaker 1>hands down, and unfortunately he got hit with that two

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<v Speaker 1>piece and and that Popaye's biscuit. You can't even you

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<v Speaker 1>can't even chew that thing. I heard she want to say,

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<v Speaker 1>what that eat? Twenty three nerves? That's what he got.

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<v Speaker 1>Hit in the back of the head the first time

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<v Speaker 1>he went down, and then he was frustrated. O refree,

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<v Speaker 1>you didn't stop. He was too knocked up to be frustrated.

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<v Speaker 1>That second that second one he got, he got a

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<v Speaker 1>he got a five finger dose a Nike will He

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<v Speaker 1>is going to have to leave the country. Even Steph

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<v Speaker 1>Curry got on, bro, did you see how bad? I

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<v Speaker 1>feel bad? But then I don't. He got his ass whooped.

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<v Speaker 1>You know how, You know how back in the day,

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<v Speaker 1>like your grandma and your mom say, I knocked you

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<v Speaker 1>in the next week, Nate got knocked into Nate next Tuesday,

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<v Speaker 1>it was, it was, it was bad. He'll be back

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<v Speaker 1>next Friday. No, he won't. You know where natives right

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<v Speaker 1>now currently after that fight, Nate is waiting for all

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<v Speaker 1>of us to catch up with him. That's where he

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<v Speaker 1>got nothing. The next year. What's that terminator? You go back,

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<v Speaker 1>you go back? You got the T two And he

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<v Speaker 1>had on. The funny part is is head on blue

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<v Speaker 1>and orange on the Knicks colors. So he was dressing.

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<v Speaker 1>He was dressing the official attire. Did you hear what happened?

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<v Speaker 1>Did you see what Adam Silver did? He took away

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<v Speaker 1>his three times swam dun championship. He show us, he

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<v Speaker 1>stripped him of all honors. We cannot even be associated

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<v Speaker 1>with you. He got his ass whooped. And then every

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<v Speaker 1>time you see Nate. What you think about by the YouTuber,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't care you got knocked out on TV. Somebody

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<v Speaker 1>got to get somebody, don't you see? You gotta get

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<v Speaker 1>his He was sitting in the chair and he was

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<v Speaker 1>just like, here's I'll tell you what he was thinking,

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<v Speaker 1>because I was thinking, yeah, what what? What? What? Give

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<v Speaker 1>me the in sequence of from the time that Nate

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<v Speaker 1>got into the ring, you want me to be Nate.

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<v Speaker 1>Be Nate as as a professional squad, but as yourself.

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<v Speaker 1>I've heard you got into a couple of rumpers before.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Give us the Steve Smith breakdown of

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<v Speaker 1>how you would how you would have came in first.

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<v Speaker 1>You gotta pick what would you come into the ring?

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<v Speaker 1>It don't even matter because you got your ass. Uh,

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<v Speaker 1>it doesn't matter. Something something hype. All right, are you

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<v Speaker 1>come in too? And you know they come in Oh yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>picturing me rolling? Okay, all right, there you go. Yeah

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<v Speaker 1>you can't do ice cube today. It was a good

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<v Speaker 1>day because that was a bad day. Oh yeah, yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>So you go you go in there and bang you

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<v Speaker 1>in there and he gets in there. You're boxing. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>about you better watch out right, they're gonna have to

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<v Speaker 1>get this dude to Scooby Snacks. When I'm finished with him,

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<v Speaker 1>think Bay round one. Now what happens you're nervous, there's

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<v Speaker 1>a whole two minute round. You realize her. Now I

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<v Speaker 1>prepare for this, but I don't know if I'm ready.

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<v Speaker 1>Mans own right, here's what he says. I'm about whoop

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<v Speaker 1>his ass? Is that Snoop doing commentary? Yes it was,

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<v Speaker 1>it's that Snoop. They got Snooper. Yeah, And so he's lungeon.

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<v Speaker 1>He's gonna look, I'm gonna rush him. I'm a that

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<v Speaker 1>ain't part of the rules. I'm gonna hit him. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>gonna hit him with a flour reason. The only problem

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<v Speaker 1>his hands down the old time. So he just left

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<v Speaker 1>himself over. I'm gonna get him. I'm gonna get him.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gona get him. About a minute in that boy

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<v Speaker 1>is painting. And here's where it gets really interested. So

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<v Speaker 1>now he calms down. But yet he still has that athleticism.

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<v Speaker 1>If I can knock for sure, Oh yeah, he's an athlete.

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<v Speaker 1>If I can knock this dude, I'm good lay basketball,

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<v Speaker 1>played football, he can box. He played a lot of things.

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<v Speaker 1>Game playbox. Know what that brother did not play. He

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<v Speaker 1>did not play a good box here custom motto could

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<v Speaker 1>have been arrested, so could have been his trainer. He

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<v Speaker 1>didn't use any of his training tips. Anybody was saying

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<v Speaker 1>that he trained twice a day. That was the issue. No,

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<v Speaker 1>the issue as his brother did not adhered anything, no guides,

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<v Speaker 1>no DC nothing. No, he didn't social distance. You don't

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<v Speaker 1>wear his mask. He didn't did not social distance Robinson's

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<v Speaker 1>face and then it just went down. Did you see

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<v Speaker 1>his eye? He laid that when he put him to sleep.

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<v Speaker 1>That's how you know he was sleep. He wasn't sleep

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<v Speaker 1>faced down in the mat. He had his head to

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<v Speaker 1>the side. You know what happens when you have your

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<v Speaker 1>head to the side, You and what they call rim

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<v Speaker 1>sleep ut the s your body is recovering from a

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<v Speaker 1>long day. The Navy had that shot of Nate when

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<v Speaker 1>his eyes was all big and he knew he was

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<v Speaker 1>going down, and his arm was already down, his arms

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<v Speaker 1>already down. It was terrible. It's like when you see

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<v Speaker 1>a dude catch the ball and get hit and he's

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<v Speaker 1>stuck in that position and they had to pry the

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<v Speaker 1>ball away. Nate was he is how you know they

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<v Speaker 1>got hit His ass was up, ass up, face down.

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<v Speaker 1>Everyone was even funny with snoops coming to you. Man

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<v Speaker 1>was awesome. Got knocked out the second time. Oh lord,

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<v Speaker 1>look at my two uncles. Look grandmother, that I got

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<v Speaker 1>the fighting boy Nate got knocked out. And then what's

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<v Speaker 1>even worse when they woke him up, he was like convulsive.

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<v Speaker 1>So you know he was in a deep sleep. He

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<v Speaker 1>was he was sleep always toy story when he was

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<v Speaker 1>sleep like this. I'm gonna go through several things that

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<v Speaker 1>I experienced when he was sleep. One five more minutes, Mommy,

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<v Speaker 1>I am Batman, Donna Tello Leonardo. He went back several decades,

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<v Speaker 1>Mighty Mouse, super Friends, the one he was dreaming about,

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<v Speaker 1>all that he was dreaming about, all of that, he

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<v Speaker 1>was dreaming about playing in the NBA. Man winning the

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<v Speaker 1>Slam Dunck contest. But you know what, he did not

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<v Speaker 1>really not. He did not win his first did not

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<v Speaker 1>in his last. I hope this is I hope this

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<v Speaker 1>is grand, open and grand. He gonna have to he

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<v Speaker 1>gonna have to keep fighting. I pray that that's not

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<v Speaker 1>his decision. No, he gotta keep fighting, because you can't

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<v Speaker 1>take that. It's not a pivot to another sport like

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<v Speaker 1>let's let's try, and it's something else like Jack's badminton, solitaire, anything, domino, spades, chess,

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<v Speaker 1>jen Remy. I don't care. You know, it's something else.

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<v Speaker 1>I just wanted yacht sie. I don't care. Uh Uno

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<v Speaker 1>flip flip is I don't think he could be mother

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<v Speaker 1>made talk. You're doing something, you know, some old school

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<v Speaker 1>anything that he can get it dubed. I'm with electronic

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<v Speaker 1>black Jack. Well, so let's have a moment of silence

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<v Speaker 1>for Nate. Alright, cool? So, hey, who do we have next? Alright,

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<v Speaker 1>come out the cut to a podcast. We've got Sam Ao,

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<v Speaker 1>an NFL linebacker that's played with the Cardinals, Bears, Bills, Bucks,

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<v Speaker 1>and Patriots, and the author of Let the World See You,

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<v Speaker 1>How to Be Real in a World Full of Fakes.

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<v Speaker 1>Sam Acho, want to cut to a podcast, man, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>glad to be here. Thank you all for having me,

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you for joining us. So our first segment is

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<v Speaker 1>called get Iced Up. It's our version of Icebreakers. Smithy

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<v Speaker 1>has some random questions. I have no idea what order

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<v Speaker 1>there in? You have no idea what order they're in.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know if he's gonna follow up. We'll get

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<v Speaker 1>right into it. Smitty, have no idea what order they're in.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh he does. He got them written down. Listen, just

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<v Speaker 1>because you're doing a few games. So I don't get

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<v Speaker 1>a twist. We do the run, we all collectively do

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<v Speaker 1>the rundown. But the ice up questions no one really knows.

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<v Speaker 1>I have like three or four pages of questions that

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<v Speaker 1>I just randomly he picked, he got, he got book pages.

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<v Speaker 1>He came in here next owners quick, and I got

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<v Speaker 1>questions like I'm like, I don't know about this one,

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<v Speaker 1>or oh I may ask a question, I'm like, uh,

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<v Speaker 1>that individual may be too stupid to answer. So let

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<v Speaker 1>me simplify it. You know those football players, those jocks,

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<v Speaker 1>those dumb linebackers. All right, he go, you ready, ye,

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<v Speaker 1>all right, buckle up, butter Cup, here we go. You

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<v Speaker 1>just finished a book that we'll discuss. Let the world

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<v Speaker 1>see you. Are you a pen or pencil person? Oh,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm a pen I'm a pen person all day. That's easy.

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<v Speaker 1>And but that's it has to be the right pan though,

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<v Speaker 1>something what kind of ballpoint? Ballpoint? Ballpoint? It's like the uniball,

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<v Speaker 1>the uniball pan ballpoint. Ideally, you like the two I

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<v Speaker 1>know what it looks like when I write with it. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>do you like spicy food? No, not even close, not

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<v Speaker 1>at all. What does it? What does it do to

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<v Speaker 1>make you sweat? Well? Why don't you like spicy food?

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<v Speaker 1>Because when I leave that restroom after this spicy food

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<v Speaker 1>is it's a problem for my body. He said, it

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<v Speaker 1>feels white love. So what was your favorite book as

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<v Speaker 1>a child? Mm hmm, that's a great question. So oh,

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<v Speaker 1>I know, thank you. I'm patting myself on the as

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<v Speaker 1>you speaking. So my favorite book, I'm gonna give you

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<v Speaker 1>this one. The only reason. And in our reality, like

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<v Speaker 1>when I was growing up, I wasn't reading all the books.

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<v Speaker 1>I was usually doing the synopsis is and you know,

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<v Speaker 1>trying to let me get the first couple of chapters.

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<v Speaker 1>But there was a book called Things Fall Apart by

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<v Speaker 1>an author named China Cheban who Chin. He's a Nigerian author,

0:14:42.360 --> 0:14:47.000
<v Speaker 1>and the book was called Things Fall Apart. The reason

0:14:47.080 --> 0:14:49.920
<v Speaker 1>I loved that book wasn't because of its contents, which

0:14:50.120 --> 0:14:52.240
<v Speaker 1>is probably not the greatest thing to say, but this

0:14:52.320 --> 0:14:54.880
<v Speaker 1>dude was a Nigerian author, and I'm Nigerian. We're reading

0:14:54.880 --> 0:14:57.880
<v Speaker 1>about reading a Nigerian dude's book in my pretty much

0:14:57.920 --> 0:15:00.680
<v Speaker 1>all white school. So for me that was dope. It

0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:02.560
<v Speaker 1>was like, oh wow, like we're in here, you know

0:15:02.640 --> 0:15:04.640
<v Speaker 1>what I mean? And so things fall apart was probably

0:15:05.280 --> 0:15:08.320
<v Speaker 1>probably my it's the most memorable at least book that

0:15:08.360 --> 0:15:11.680
<v Speaker 1>I read growing up. I'll do that now. I can't

0:15:11.680 --> 0:15:13.160
<v Speaker 1>tell you what it was about. But I did have

0:15:13.200 --> 0:15:18.320
<v Speaker 1>to read that book. Really no flex, no cap As

0:15:18.360 --> 0:15:22.280
<v Speaker 1>the younger generation said, I didn't. I noticed my support

0:15:22.800 --> 0:15:24.960
<v Speaker 1>may my he who cares. I didn't read a lot

0:15:25.000 --> 0:15:27.280
<v Speaker 1>of books when I was I was growing up. It

0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:32.720
<v Speaker 1>just was not something that was that was offered. Uh.

0:15:32.760 --> 0:15:36.520
<v Speaker 1>But I love reading books today, and I'll read a

0:15:36.560 --> 0:15:38.960
<v Speaker 1>book and I'll stop reading a book in a heartbeat,

0:15:38.960 --> 0:15:41.640
<v Speaker 1>like if I if I get enough information, I'll take

0:15:41.680 --> 0:15:43.800
<v Speaker 1>notes and say, well, don't make you stop reading it.

0:15:44.320 --> 0:15:47.920
<v Speaker 1>Well not not not flextion or you know, not trying

0:15:48.000 --> 0:15:54.160
<v Speaker 1>to be you know, prisoner of the moment. But I

0:15:54.360 --> 0:16:00.200
<v Speaker 1>stopped your book, Sam three times mm hmm, because as

0:16:00.680 --> 0:16:02.360
<v Speaker 1>it really spoke to me, it broke me down. I

0:16:02.360 --> 0:16:04.760
<v Speaker 1>had to go in my office when I was reading it,

0:16:05.080 --> 0:16:08.760
<v Speaker 1>talking about your mentor and we'll we'll dive deep, but

0:16:09.200 --> 0:16:12.960
<v Speaker 1>asking the permission to pass away that that really spoke

0:16:13.000 --> 0:16:15.520
<v Speaker 1>to me and I have to stop. I literally start

0:16:15.560 --> 0:16:17.280
<v Speaker 1>tearing up, and I walked in off. I told I

0:16:17.480 --> 0:16:20.440
<v Speaker 1>was reading you. I told wife, I said, I'm gonna

0:16:20.440 --> 0:16:22.760
<v Speaker 1>go in my office and do some work. And I

0:16:22.880 --> 0:16:25.080
<v Speaker 1>was wiping a little little tears out of my eyes.

0:16:25.480 --> 0:16:27.560
<v Speaker 1>So I know, we you know this is cut to it,

0:16:27.560 --> 0:16:30.400
<v Speaker 1>and we we got a pretty good following. But I

0:16:30.480 --> 0:16:32.600
<v Speaker 1>cut everybody in the room. If y'all tell anybody that

0:16:32.600 --> 0:16:35.920
<v Speaker 1>I was all right, last one, last one, and this

0:16:35.960 --> 0:16:38.320
<v Speaker 1>one tell me everything. Now, I'm gonna joke around with you,

0:16:38.320 --> 0:16:41.280
<v Speaker 1>you know, defensive guys and offensive guys. We always bantering

0:16:41.360 --> 0:16:46.280
<v Speaker 1>back and forth. But I think you look like um,

0:16:46.360 --> 0:16:49.720
<v Speaker 1>you know you from you just dark skinning, you play linebacker.

0:16:49.840 --> 0:16:54.320
<v Speaker 1>You're ugly, so so you you. I'm gonna ask you

0:16:54.360 --> 0:16:57.960
<v Speaker 1>what your favorite ice cream flavor is because you look

0:16:58.040 --> 0:17:04.080
<v Speaker 1>like you're like butter. But calm, first of all, I

0:17:04.119 --> 0:17:05.639
<v Speaker 1>don't I don't know where it's starting. Man, he just

0:17:05.720 --> 0:17:09.879
<v Speaker 1>racially profiled you. He just just basically profiled you. He

0:17:11.800 --> 0:17:15.320
<v Speaker 1>profiled me by my race, my taste buds, by my

0:17:15.480 --> 0:17:18.719
<v Speaker 1>position group. That's a problem right now. All the profiles

0:17:19.040 --> 0:17:22.800
<v Speaker 1>Steve Smith's fault what's your flavor, Soucker. It's hey, I'm

0:17:22.800 --> 0:17:24.720
<v Speaker 1>a cookies and cream guy. Every day of the week

0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:26.880
<v Speaker 1>that ends up, since I've been, since I've been five

0:17:26.960 --> 0:17:30.200
<v Speaker 1>years old until thirty or whatever. I will eat. I will.

0:17:30.760 --> 0:17:33.520
<v Speaker 1>I don't care where I go. Give me cookies and

0:17:33.520 --> 0:17:38.359
<v Speaker 1>cream and it's not it's not I'm probably just not

0:17:38.359 --> 0:17:40.440
<v Speaker 1>eating ice cream. Just give me cookies and cream. That's

0:17:40.480 --> 0:17:43.159
<v Speaker 1>just that's my thing. So vanilla bean, I'll do with

0:17:43.240 --> 0:17:45.720
<v Speaker 1>vanilla bean. I'll do vanilla bean every now and again.

0:17:45.920 --> 0:17:49.200
<v Speaker 1>You were winning with the cookies and cream. I'm definitely

0:17:49.240 --> 0:17:51.560
<v Speaker 1>definitely with Sam. I'm definitely big cookies and cream. But

0:17:51.640 --> 0:17:53.720
<v Speaker 1>I don't eat a lot of ice cream. I am.

0:17:53.840 --> 0:17:56.560
<v Speaker 1>I'm that black dude who is who is lacto? So

0:17:56.600 --> 0:17:59.520
<v Speaker 1>I can't eat ice cream. I'm bad business when you're

0:17:59.560 --> 0:18:04.159
<v Speaker 1>not supposed stupid. But sometimes I have always loved it.

0:18:04.200 --> 0:18:08.960
<v Speaker 1>I don't know why Rocky roll with a with a

0:18:09.080 --> 0:18:11.040
<v Speaker 1>nasty I don't even think I've had that before. That's

0:18:11.280 --> 0:18:16.080
<v Speaker 1>much with a nasty cake. Yeah, with a cake cone.

0:18:16.119 --> 0:18:20.520
<v Speaker 1>You know the styrophone comb. If I eat ice frome,

0:18:20.560 --> 0:18:23.199
<v Speaker 1>I gotta get like the kids size. I can't just

0:18:23.400 --> 0:18:25.479
<v Speaker 1>can't do it bro, you know it won't do it.

0:18:25.560 --> 0:18:28.320
<v Speaker 1>You know what I hate though, because my dad used

0:18:28.320 --> 0:18:30.520
<v Speaker 1>to eat it, and I think that's the worst flame.

0:18:30.640 --> 0:18:35.399
<v Speaker 1>Butter ber cons that's all he would eat is. But

0:18:35.800 --> 0:18:39.520
<v Speaker 1>it is so nasty. It's I don't really I pick

0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:43.159
<v Speaker 1>out the depends where you from. I didn't want to

0:18:43.160 --> 0:18:45.400
<v Speaker 1>say that, we say. I didn't want to say that. Nothing.

0:18:51.000 --> 0:18:53.720
<v Speaker 1>All right, let's move Hey we have digress. But it's

0:18:53.760 --> 0:18:58.639
<v Speaker 1>been fun. Sam. I appreciate you coming on again. You

0:18:58.680 --> 0:19:02.120
<v Speaker 1>could get Sam's booked. Let the world see you. It's

0:19:02.160 --> 0:19:07.800
<v Speaker 1>a fantastic read. Um. It's true. Your transparency is also

0:19:07.880 --> 0:19:12.919
<v Speaker 1>which which lead me to having you asking you to

0:19:12.960 --> 0:19:15.520
<v Speaker 1>come on here, because you give us a different perspective.

0:19:15.560 --> 0:19:18.320
<v Speaker 1>I also want your faith to come out in this.

0:19:18.440 --> 0:19:21.000
<v Speaker 1>I got some faith questions I really think you are

0:19:21.560 --> 0:19:25.520
<v Speaker 1>super qualified um to talk about and I think you're

0:19:25.520 --> 0:19:28.040
<v Speaker 1>gonna appreciate it too, because at times, you know, when

0:19:28.040 --> 0:19:30.200
<v Speaker 1>we talk about faith people, a lot of times it

0:19:30.240 --> 0:19:31.879
<v Speaker 1>gets turned off. But I want to ask you some

0:19:31.920 --> 0:19:35.880
<v Speaker 1>faith questions that really resonate in how you have been

0:19:35.920 --> 0:19:40.960
<v Speaker 1>able to maneuver through the game of football and then

0:19:40.960 --> 0:19:44.320
<v Speaker 1>also the game of Let's just be honest. The game

0:19:44.359 --> 0:19:47.439
<v Speaker 1>of judgment of of of of Christians. At times we

0:19:47.560 --> 0:19:51.359
<v Speaker 1>can be amongst ourselves, you know. Um, A number of

0:19:51.359 --> 0:19:53.720
<v Speaker 1>times I've had people come up to me and say,

0:19:53.760 --> 0:19:56.440
<v Speaker 1>how do you call yourself a believer? If you're working

0:19:56.440 --> 0:20:03.040
<v Speaker 1>on Sunday? What I've Yeah, I mean I thought so,

0:20:03.359 --> 0:20:06.560
<v Speaker 1>but I'm not sure they've. I mean some of the

0:20:06.600 --> 0:20:08.600
<v Speaker 1>churches I've been to. In current church I go to

0:20:08.720 --> 0:20:13.760
<v Speaker 1>now on that Sunday, they do a pastors off. All right,

0:20:13.800 --> 0:20:16.560
<v Speaker 1>so let's start off. So what was your favorite team

0:20:16.720 --> 0:20:21.919
<v Speaker 1>growing up? Any sport? Oh, any sport, any sort? And

0:20:22.000 --> 0:20:25.159
<v Speaker 1>with the questions today, okay, oh you we ain't even

0:20:25.200 --> 0:20:34.479
<v Speaker 1>got started. Brother, My favorite team? My favorite team. I

0:20:34.560 --> 0:20:40.280
<v Speaker 1>like the Rockets growing up because a chem was part

0:20:40.280 --> 0:20:42.080
<v Speaker 1>of it. But also so I'm from Dallas, so I'm

0:20:42.119 --> 0:20:44.760
<v Speaker 1>not from Houston, but I liked the rock The mass

0:20:44.760 --> 0:20:47.720
<v Speaker 1>were weren't great back then. I like the Rockets terrible

0:20:47.760 --> 0:20:50.280
<v Speaker 1>in in the in the nineties coming up, they were awful.

0:20:51.119 --> 0:20:54.560
<v Speaker 1>Hell is black Man and then and uh and um,

0:20:55.280 --> 0:20:56.760
<v Speaker 1>but then they got they had there was a period

0:20:56.760 --> 0:20:59.520
<v Speaker 1>there they had Steve Nash, they had Michael Finley, uh,

0:20:59.560 --> 0:21:02.960
<v Speaker 1>and they had but then they let Nash and Philly

0:21:03.000 --> 0:21:05.680
<v Speaker 1>go and I'm like, okay, what are we doing? But

0:21:05.680 --> 0:21:11.960
<v Speaker 1>but so the rockets, but also the Houston comments whatever reason, Yes,

0:21:14.760 --> 0:21:18.960
<v Speaker 1>and that was the that was pulled three back. Yeah,

0:21:19.040 --> 0:21:20.520
<v Speaker 1>that was a big three back in the day Anthea

0:21:20.680 --> 0:21:25.439
<v Speaker 1>Tina Thompson and uh yeah yes, cool, okay, so that

0:21:25.480 --> 0:21:28.880
<v Speaker 1>would be those are probably my team's took you long enough.

0:21:28.960 --> 0:21:34.119
<v Speaker 1>But like a linebacker trying to dissect the run, play stop,

0:21:34.640 --> 0:21:41.000
<v Speaker 1>the offices are easy to boom. The tackle gives it away,

0:21:41.000 --> 0:21:43.399
<v Speaker 1>the tackle past walking on the look like what you

0:21:43.440 --> 0:21:50.000
<v Speaker 1>doing the tackle? Yeah, big hog my lace and it's

0:21:50.000 --> 0:21:52.399
<v Speaker 1>pause for a little bit. We'll be right back after

0:21:52.440 --> 0:21:59.360
<v Speaker 1>this break. I love cut to It, and I love

0:21:59.359 --> 0:22:03.520
<v Speaker 1>it even more when you download us and subscribe and

0:22:03.960 --> 0:22:06.160
<v Speaker 1>you can follow us on social media too, Smithie, where

0:22:06.200 --> 0:22:09.159
<v Speaker 1>where at? That's at? Cut to It on Instagram? What

0:22:09.280 --> 0:22:14.399
<v Speaker 1>about Twitter? At? Cut to It Facebook? Cut to It

0:22:14.480 --> 0:22:18.320
<v Speaker 1>featuring Steve Smith singr. What about online? And you can

0:22:18.359 --> 0:22:21.040
<v Speaker 1>follow us at cut to It podcast dot com where

0:22:21.200 --> 0:22:24.159
<v Speaker 1>you can buy merch and you can subscribe to us

0:22:24.160 --> 0:22:29.360
<v Speaker 1>wherever you listen to podcasts. I got all my answers questions, Um, yeah,

0:22:29.560 --> 0:22:32.760
<v Speaker 1>I got all my questions answered. That's what I'm here

0:22:32.800 --> 0:22:37.520
<v Speaker 1>for a brother? Cut to a podcast dot com Where

0:22:37.560 --> 0:22:40.919
<v Speaker 1>are you from in a place you call your hometown?

0:22:42.000 --> 0:22:44.240
<v Speaker 1>Great question, I'm from I was born in Dallas, so

0:22:44.280 --> 0:22:48.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm from Dallas, but I called Chicago home right now

0:22:48.200 --> 0:22:50.080
<v Speaker 1>and I'm a little bit of a transition. But well,

0:22:50.080 --> 0:22:51.879
<v Speaker 1>well I played for the Bears for four years and

0:22:51.880 --> 0:22:54.040
<v Speaker 1>this city really embraced me. Right maybe for you, I

0:22:54.080 --> 0:22:56.520
<v Speaker 1>don't know if that would have been Baltimore, Carolina that

0:22:56.600 --> 0:22:59.480
<v Speaker 1>really embraced you, but shaka, yeah, I played in Arizona

0:22:59.480 --> 0:23:01.760
<v Speaker 1>and y'all play in tap but Chicago really embraced me.

0:23:01.800 --> 0:23:03.680
<v Speaker 1>Like I go a lot of places. Where I go here,

0:23:03.720 --> 0:23:05.720
<v Speaker 1>people know me, and you know, I just feel like that.

0:23:06.119 --> 0:23:08.720
<v Speaker 1>I feel like I fit in this city when it

0:23:08.720 --> 0:23:10.680
<v Speaker 1>comes to like a need basis right, trying to help

0:23:10.680 --> 0:23:13.760
<v Speaker 1>build the people up, but also just from uh the people.

0:23:13.760 --> 0:23:17.200
<v Speaker 1>I love the city. For me, Charlotte is the place

0:23:17.280 --> 0:23:19.560
<v Speaker 1>now call home. It's only taking me about seventeen and

0:23:19.560 --> 0:23:23.240
<v Speaker 1>a half years to say that. Um, but my football

0:23:23.320 --> 0:23:26.440
<v Speaker 1>home actually is Baltimore. UM. I can go that city

0:23:26.520 --> 0:23:28.359
<v Speaker 1>right now and say we're gonna do a charity event

0:23:28.760 --> 0:23:30.920
<v Speaker 1>and people will come in droves. I can I can

0:23:30.920 --> 0:23:32.680
<v Speaker 1>go to I can go to Baltimore and say, hey,

0:23:32.720 --> 0:23:35.560
<v Speaker 1>we need ten thousand dollars for this. People do it

0:23:36.160 --> 0:23:38.159
<v Speaker 1>a little bit in Charlotte. Sometimes it's like, well we

0:23:38.240 --> 0:23:43.960
<v Speaker 1>gotta see, let me see what my savers in my

0:23:44.080 --> 0:23:49.280
<v Speaker 1>checking is doing. But you know, but both cities have

0:23:49.359 --> 0:23:55.600
<v Speaker 1>embraced me. Is just I think Baltimore in a football sense. Um, well,

0:23:55.840 --> 0:23:59.760
<v Speaker 1>they're just a different city, right in the football sense. So, Sam,

0:23:59.800 --> 0:24:02.600
<v Speaker 1>you born in Dallas, growing up in Dallas, how did

0:24:02.600 --> 0:24:08.040
<v Speaker 1>it shape your view on the world today? Growing up

0:24:08.080 --> 0:24:10.000
<v Speaker 1>in Dallas? How did it shape my view? Well? I

0:24:10.080 --> 0:24:14.399
<v Speaker 1>grew up in Dallas, yes, but my parents are from Nigeria,

0:24:14.520 --> 0:24:17.080
<v Speaker 1>so we spent a lot of time at Nigerian events,

0:24:17.240 --> 0:24:21.400
<v Speaker 1>if that makes any sense. So every every first Saturday

0:24:21.400 --> 0:24:24.480
<v Speaker 1>of the month, there was something called African Christian Fellowship.

0:24:25.119 --> 0:24:30.879
<v Speaker 1>All the Nigerians from the Dallas Fort Worth metroplex, almost

0:24:30.920 --> 0:24:32.639
<v Speaker 1>a lot of them, maybe all of them would get together,

0:24:33.000 --> 0:24:35.200
<v Speaker 1>you know, these young parents and their kids would get together.

0:24:35.240 --> 0:24:37.600
<v Speaker 1>We almost grew up together in a lot of ways,

0:24:37.720 --> 0:24:40.520
<v Speaker 1>and so that those were once a month. But then

0:24:40.560 --> 0:24:42.639
<v Speaker 1>also there will be events, whether it be weddings or

0:24:42.800 --> 0:24:45.119
<v Speaker 1>parties or whatever. Not even not like a party, like

0:24:45.160 --> 0:24:47.399
<v Speaker 1>going to the club, but like this get together gatherings

0:24:48.000 --> 0:24:50.760
<v Speaker 1>where we all kind of together. Go ahead. I had

0:24:50.840 --> 0:24:54.440
<v Speaker 1>a family event, a family event, but it was extended family.

0:24:54.520 --> 0:24:56.840
<v Speaker 1>So now, like like a lot of these Nigerian people

0:24:56.880 --> 0:24:59.040
<v Speaker 1>you see in the NFL, a lot of us know

0:24:59.119 --> 0:25:00.560
<v Speaker 1>each other in some way. And if we don't know

0:25:00.600 --> 0:25:02.119
<v Speaker 1>each other, our parents know each other. Right, We'll be

0:25:02.119 --> 0:25:04.480
<v Speaker 1>watching the draft. My dad would be like, some random

0:25:04.560 --> 0:25:07.920
<v Speaker 1>Nigerian dude will get drafted and I'm like fifteen fourteen,

0:25:07.960 --> 0:25:10.479
<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, okay, we're watching. But that would be like, oh,

0:25:10.480 --> 0:25:12.360
<v Speaker 1>I know defined out, I know defined, I know him,

0:25:12.520 --> 0:25:16.280
<v Speaker 1>Like that's no way you know. Then the next guy, Okay, yes, yes,

0:25:16.320 --> 0:25:18.720
<v Speaker 1>I know, I know, yes from my village, Like there's

0:25:18.760 --> 0:25:21.840
<v Speaker 1>no way. But it's so true and so true. The

0:25:21.840 --> 0:25:23.439
<v Speaker 1>way my parents even got to that my parents were

0:25:23.440 --> 0:25:26.440
<v Speaker 1>from Nigeria. They came over to Virginia. Initially was super

0:25:26.440 --> 0:25:28.440
<v Speaker 1>cold up there and not a lot of they didn't

0:25:28.440 --> 0:25:30.359
<v Speaker 1>have any friends. And there's some Nigerian people who they

0:25:30.400 --> 0:25:33.240
<v Speaker 1>knew from their village area who were in Texas, who

0:25:33.280 --> 0:25:35.400
<v Speaker 1>were in Dallas, and they said, hey, it's a lot

0:25:35.400 --> 0:25:38.200
<v Speaker 1>of Nigerians down here. In Dallas Houston. Just come come here,

0:25:38.240 --> 0:25:40.560
<v Speaker 1>like we'll kind of help you out family, and so

0:25:40.720 --> 0:25:43.159
<v Speaker 1>that's how they got here. So so my growing up

0:25:43.200 --> 0:25:46.000
<v Speaker 1>in Dallas experience, it wasn't like I really got a

0:25:46.080 --> 0:25:47.919
<v Speaker 1>chance to know Dallas. I just got a chance to

0:25:47.920 --> 0:25:51.280
<v Speaker 1>know different cultures. Nigerian culture was one piece another piece

0:25:51.280 --> 0:25:52.679
<v Speaker 1>and talking and I talked about this a little bit

0:25:52.680 --> 0:25:55.000
<v Speaker 1>in my book as well, right, the Nigerian Peace. Also

0:25:55.040 --> 0:25:56.840
<v Speaker 1>I went to church in South elk Cliffe, so like

0:25:56.880 --> 0:26:00.280
<v Speaker 1>the South Dallas Peace. But then also the cool I

0:26:00.320 --> 0:26:02.320
<v Speaker 1>went to was a predominantly white school, so almost like

0:26:02.320 --> 0:26:04.720
<v Speaker 1>the rich the old money. Talk about pen, you talk

0:26:04.760 --> 0:26:06.800
<v Speaker 1>about pens, Right, a dude in my class, his name

0:26:06.960 --> 0:26:08.240
<v Speaker 1>or he was a year or two younger. His name

0:26:08.280 --> 0:26:11.199
<v Speaker 1>is Drew Jalish. He was in my grade. Actually his

0:26:11.320 --> 0:26:14.600
<v Speaker 1>dad invented the three in one pen, the first three

0:26:14.600 --> 0:26:16.560
<v Speaker 1>in one pen, so it was a pen that could

0:26:16.600 --> 0:26:19.560
<v Speaker 1>also be like with like a highlighter and then a

0:26:19.640 --> 0:26:21.920
<v Speaker 1>stylist for the new iPads and things that it wasn't

0:26:21.920 --> 0:26:23.840
<v Speaker 1>even I pad. It was another kind of thing that

0:26:23.880 --> 0:26:25.720
<v Speaker 1>was coming out back then. Right, Another dude who was

0:26:25.720 --> 0:26:29.000
<v Speaker 1>actually in my grade one the not the scripts National

0:26:29.200 --> 0:26:32.879
<v Speaker 1>spelling be Um Ross Perot who ran for president his

0:26:33.040 --> 0:26:35.480
<v Speaker 1>his kids went to that school. Um, I mean it

0:26:35.520 --> 0:26:37.920
<v Speaker 1>was that kind of school. So when I say old money,

0:26:37.960 --> 0:26:41.200
<v Speaker 1>I mean as soon as you're turning fifteen sixteen kids

0:26:41.200 --> 0:26:44.440
<v Speaker 1>are pulling up in range overs. What were some unrealistic

0:26:44.560 --> 0:26:51.480
<v Speaker 1>expectations and how did those unrealistic expectations impact you mentally

0:26:51.720 --> 0:26:56.000
<v Speaker 1>being a preacher's son. Now, I love that question. Some

0:26:56.080 --> 0:26:59.320
<v Speaker 1>of the unrealistic expectations weren't the fact that I was

0:26:59.320 --> 0:27:01.560
<v Speaker 1>a preacher just on So in Nigerian culture, I was

0:27:01.600 --> 0:27:06.119
<v Speaker 1>also the first son, first the first boy, and so firstborn.

0:27:06.160 --> 0:27:08.080
<v Speaker 1>No no, no, I have two older sisters, so that's

0:27:08.160 --> 0:27:11.480
<v Speaker 1>but in Nigerian culture, the first son is the one

0:27:11.520 --> 0:27:13.280
<v Speaker 1>in a lot of ways who takes the inheritance. And

0:27:13.320 --> 0:27:15.119
<v Speaker 1>why say inheritance, It's like okay, you go back to

0:27:15.119 --> 0:27:17.240
<v Speaker 1>the village, but you know, it's like you there's you know,

0:27:17.760 --> 0:27:20.359
<v Speaker 1>everything that you have will go to the first son

0:27:20.520 --> 0:27:24.639
<v Speaker 1>culturally speaking. And so the pressure wasn't the fact that

0:27:24.680 --> 0:27:26.119
<v Speaker 1>and I know we will get to the kind of

0:27:26.119 --> 0:27:29.040
<v Speaker 1>the Christian aspects I'd love to get to. But the

0:27:29.080 --> 0:27:31.080
<v Speaker 1>pressure that I felt to answer your question was this

0:27:31.200 --> 0:27:33.919
<v Speaker 1>feeling of Okay, am I going to be enough? For me?

0:27:34.000 --> 0:27:38.120
<v Speaker 1>It was this deal of okay I I love to compete, right.

0:27:38.160 --> 0:27:40.040
<v Speaker 1>You don't make it in a lot of whether it's

0:27:40.119 --> 0:27:42.720
<v Speaker 1>NFL or whatever without competing. But there's also aside of

0:27:42.760 --> 0:27:49.679
<v Speaker 1>me that really loves loves. I empathize with people. I

0:27:49.720 --> 0:27:52.439
<v Speaker 1>empathize with their pain, with their struggle. What and so

0:27:52.520 --> 0:27:55.720
<v Speaker 1>for whatever reason, I felt like that wasn't who I

0:27:55.760 --> 0:28:00.200
<v Speaker 1>was supposed to be, right Nigeria. You been in Nigeria,

0:28:00.400 --> 0:28:05.600
<v Speaker 1>the manner come on, get out, just hurry up. And

0:28:05.640 --> 0:28:08.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm like and I'm like, can we just like, can

0:28:08.080 --> 0:28:10.160
<v Speaker 1>we take some time? Can I think about it? Can

0:28:10.200 --> 0:28:13.880
<v Speaker 1>I for me? Right? Right? So for me and no one,

0:28:14.000 --> 0:28:19.040
<v Speaker 1>it wasn't verbalized to me, but it's what I saw somethinking, Okay,

0:28:19.160 --> 0:28:23.280
<v Speaker 1>am I am I enough? Am I enough? And so

0:28:23.400 --> 0:28:26.399
<v Speaker 1>and that's for me personally, is from a culturally whatever.

0:28:26.680 --> 0:28:28.879
<v Speaker 1>But if people go through that, whether whether it's in

0:28:28.880 --> 0:28:33.240
<v Speaker 1>the church, in church aspect, or in sport or in business,

0:28:33.280 --> 0:28:35.679
<v Speaker 1>this idea of am I enough? That was the question

0:28:35.680 --> 0:28:39.320
<v Speaker 1>that I grappled with starting from a young age. And

0:28:39.360 --> 0:28:41.560
<v Speaker 1>so the preachers something that kind of popped in there

0:28:41.600 --> 0:28:44.280
<v Speaker 1>a little bit. Um you know, But my dad was

0:28:44.320 --> 0:28:45.840
<v Speaker 1>more than just a preacher, right He's a pastor at

0:28:45.840 --> 0:28:47.480
<v Speaker 1>the church, but also is a businessman. He's also a

0:28:47.560 --> 0:28:50.880
<v Speaker 1>Nigerian businessman, a missionary, all these things. And I've heard

0:28:50.880 --> 0:28:54.200
<v Speaker 1>it said people some people don't have a father in

0:28:54.200 --> 0:28:56.960
<v Speaker 1>their house, and there's this question of man, am I enough?

0:28:57.000 --> 0:29:00.440
<v Speaker 1>My daddy never told me I was enough. Other people

0:29:00.880 --> 0:29:03.840
<v Speaker 1>have dads who are doing phenomenal and they still ask

0:29:03.920 --> 0:29:06.200
<v Speaker 1>the same question, will I be able to live up

0:29:06.200 --> 0:29:09.240
<v Speaker 1>to what my dad did? I don't think maybe if

0:29:09.280 --> 0:29:12.120
<v Speaker 1>any where I felt, I would fall in that second aspect. Right,

0:29:12.160 --> 0:29:14.320
<v Speaker 1>dad did a great job, but there was this idea

0:29:14.320 --> 0:29:19.000
<v Speaker 1>of who am I? Who am I? You know? And

0:29:19.000 --> 0:29:22.200
<v Speaker 1>that's why when you and I connected in Angola, like,

0:29:22.280 --> 0:29:23.960
<v Speaker 1>I just gained so much more respect for you. I

0:29:23.960 --> 0:29:27.120
<v Speaker 1>always respected you watching you right like and even I'm

0:29:27.160 --> 0:29:28.600
<v Speaker 1>gonna aid you a little bit, but playing with you

0:29:28.640 --> 0:29:30.080
<v Speaker 1>on Madden when I was a little kid, when I

0:29:30.080 --> 0:29:32.840
<v Speaker 1>was in the high school, right, I always respected you

0:29:32.880 --> 0:29:36.320
<v Speaker 1>as a player, and that just the way you competed,

0:29:36.320 --> 0:29:37.800
<v Speaker 1>the way it was like it something like people watch

0:29:37.800 --> 0:29:39.640
<v Speaker 1>Honey Badger. Now, like you say you're gonna do something,

0:29:39.640 --> 0:29:41.960
<v Speaker 1>you do it. I don't care what anybody else says.

0:29:42.000 --> 0:29:44.000
<v Speaker 1>But meeting you in person and seeing the way you

0:29:44.080 --> 0:29:47.000
<v Speaker 1>interacted with those men in Angola and you talk about

0:29:47.040 --> 0:29:50.040
<v Speaker 1>being honest and being vulnerable and being real, I was like, Oh,

0:29:50.080 --> 0:29:52.560
<v Speaker 1>this dude's real. I gained so much more respect for you,

0:29:52.880 --> 0:29:55.520
<v Speaker 1>number one. But also I said, oh, wow, he and

0:29:55.600 --> 0:29:59.440
<v Speaker 1>I I think we're more similar than we are different, right,

0:29:59.440 --> 0:30:01.400
<v Speaker 1>because it's I idea of and I've heard some interviews

0:30:01.400 --> 0:30:06.200
<v Speaker 1>you've done, etcetera. But this idea of man like insecurity.

0:30:07.000 --> 0:30:10.200
<v Speaker 1>Insecurity often drove like insecurity would drive me in a

0:30:10.240 --> 0:30:11.960
<v Speaker 1>lot of ways, even in college. Went to Texas and

0:30:12.000 --> 0:30:14.160
<v Speaker 1>won a lot of wars and chant went to national championship,

0:30:14.200 --> 0:30:17.320
<v Speaker 1>all the things, but a lot of me was driven

0:30:17.320 --> 0:30:20.880
<v Speaker 1>by insecurity, this thinking, Okay, I don't know if I'm

0:30:20.880 --> 0:30:24.160
<v Speaker 1>gonna be good enough for what everyone expects. And so

0:30:24.200 --> 0:30:28.080
<v Speaker 1>it was almost be trying to prove to myself that

0:30:28.200 --> 0:30:29.800
<v Speaker 1>I could do it. And it wasn't like I did

0:30:29.800 --> 0:30:31.240
<v Speaker 1>it one time and it's like, yeah, I'm the man.

0:30:31.760 --> 0:30:34.200
<v Speaker 1>It was like, man, I hope I can do it again.

0:30:34.720 --> 0:30:37.120
<v Speaker 1>And so that, to answer your question, was what I

0:30:37.160 --> 0:30:38.920
<v Speaker 1>was dealing with, and that's what the book talks about

0:30:38.920 --> 0:30:42.960
<v Speaker 1>this idea who are you right? Like, who am I really?

0:30:43.000 --> 0:30:44.600
<v Speaker 1>Because a lot of us we put on these masks

0:30:44.600 --> 0:30:46.560
<v Speaker 1>and we prot we talked about what I mean Like

0:30:47.200 --> 0:30:49.360
<v Speaker 1>sometimes some of us it's the bravado, right, yeah, yeah?

0:30:49.360 --> 0:30:52.400
<v Speaker 1>What what what? Others it's the uh, you know, trying

0:30:52.440 --> 0:30:54.560
<v Speaker 1>to fit in right too, whether it's white culture or

0:30:54.600 --> 0:30:57.800
<v Speaker 1>black culture or whatever. We put on these masks, and

0:30:57.840 --> 0:31:02.720
<v Speaker 1>I saw myself. I saw myself after I didn't realize it,

0:31:02.760 --> 0:31:04.240
<v Speaker 1>but after wearing all these masks, I was like I

0:31:04.280 --> 0:31:07.560
<v Speaker 1>was starting to like break down, like the talking about

0:31:07.680 --> 0:31:09.480
<v Speaker 1>going to love and respect right, going to that book

0:31:09.480 --> 0:31:11.160
<v Speaker 1>when things are going bad, like things were going bad

0:31:11.160 --> 0:31:14.600
<v Speaker 1>in my marriage, these are going bad in my relationship

0:31:14.640 --> 0:31:17.479
<v Speaker 1>with my kids, things are going bad with my relationship

0:31:17.520 --> 0:31:19.320
<v Speaker 1>with my family. I just wasn't. I was. I didn't.

0:31:20.120 --> 0:31:22.200
<v Speaker 1>This is a I'm not even gonna use the phrase,

0:31:22.240 --> 0:31:24.120
<v Speaker 1>but I just wasn't being who God and made me

0:31:24.160 --> 0:31:26.800
<v Speaker 1>to be. And by God's grace, had a really good

0:31:26.800 --> 0:31:28.880
<v Speaker 1>friend who saw that in me and who I was

0:31:28.920 --> 0:31:32.160
<v Speaker 1>able to open up to. And and he actually looked

0:31:32.200 --> 0:31:33.280
<v Speaker 1>at me, he said, because I said. It was a

0:31:33.280 --> 0:31:36.200
<v Speaker 1>week before training camp eight, going to my going into

0:31:36.240 --> 0:31:39.240
<v Speaker 1>year age, just a multi year, multimillion dollar contract. I'd

0:31:39.280 --> 0:31:41.400
<v Speaker 1>made it. In many people's eyes, right, every other thing

0:31:41.480 --> 0:31:45.560
<v Speaker 1>was a minimum people's eyes. You made it. You made it.

0:31:45.880 --> 0:31:48.440
<v Speaker 1>I made it. And I remember being a week before

0:31:48.520 --> 0:31:52.240
<v Speaker 1>training camp and like I said, marriage wasn't Like I was,

0:31:52.560 --> 0:31:53.800
<v Speaker 1>how do I how do I be? How do I

0:31:53.840 --> 0:31:56.680
<v Speaker 1>be talking about lusting with your eyes? Like? How do

0:31:56.720 --> 0:31:58.560
<v Speaker 1>I stop doing that? You know what I mean? Like

0:31:59.120 --> 0:32:01.840
<v Speaker 1>people talk about like angry, you know, be slow to anger?

0:32:01.880 --> 0:32:03.719
<v Speaker 1>Why do I Why am I getting angry so quickly? Right?

0:32:03.720 --> 0:32:05.720
<v Speaker 1>I remember sitting down with a friend before training camp,

0:32:06.160 --> 0:32:08.520
<v Speaker 1>looking at him and it's like, like, dude, I don't

0:32:08.520 --> 0:32:10.760
<v Speaker 1>know what's going on. But I said, man, I just

0:32:10.760 --> 0:32:12.600
<v Speaker 1>need to get to once the season starts. So I

0:32:12.640 --> 0:32:14.280
<v Speaker 1>give me seven days. Let me get to training camp.

0:32:14.320 --> 0:32:16.040
<v Speaker 1>I'll be back with my teammates. Once I get there,

0:32:16.080 --> 0:32:17.520
<v Speaker 1>I'll be okay. Because I don't know what's going on

0:32:17.560 --> 0:32:20.000
<v Speaker 1>in my life. This dude looked at me in my

0:32:20.040 --> 0:32:23.120
<v Speaker 1>eye right at a restaurant in Chicago, looked at me

0:32:23.160 --> 0:32:25.960
<v Speaker 1>and he said, he said, Sam, I hear what you're saying.

0:32:26.000 --> 0:32:27.760
<v Speaker 1>He said, but if that's how you feel right now,

0:32:29.080 --> 0:32:31.840
<v Speaker 1>so I'm concerned about what happens when when when you retire,

0:32:31.920 --> 0:32:36.120
<v Speaker 1>when football ends for you, I'm really really concerned because

0:32:36.200 --> 0:32:40.280
<v Speaker 1>then you have to now you have to address all

0:32:40.320 --> 0:32:43.080
<v Speaker 1>the things that you have that football has allowed you

0:32:43.160 --> 0:32:46.520
<v Speaker 1>not to address that I've been running from exactly. You

0:32:46.560 --> 0:32:48.160
<v Speaker 1>have to now you have when you get up in

0:32:48.160 --> 0:32:50.240
<v Speaker 1>the morning. Now you have to see that individual where

0:32:50.280 --> 0:32:52.800
<v Speaker 1>before you can kiss him on the four go off

0:32:52.840 --> 0:32:58.000
<v Speaker 1>to work. And and it was you choose how do

0:32:58.080 --> 0:33:01.160
<v Speaker 1>we interact? Do we do we go backwards and argue

0:33:01.160 --> 0:33:04.560
<v Speaker 1>about what we did didn't address, or do we stay

0:33:05.160 --> 0:33:08.400
<v Speaker 1>air quotes in the present? You know, we just appreciate

0:33:08.400 --> 0:33:12.600
<v Speaker 1>where we are. What's the fear and showing not someone

0:33:13.360 --> 0:33:17.600
<v Speaker 1>what it was the fear and showing your true self

0:33:17.920 --> 0:33:22.920
<v Speaker 1>to your wife. Mm hmmm. See that's the question. Our

0:33:23.040 --> 0:33:28.600
<v Speaker 1>biggest fear, it's human race. Let me be general and

0:33:28.680 --> 0:33:31.640
<v Speaker 1>my specific biggest fear is the fear of not being loved.

0:33:32.080 --> 0:33:35.560
<v Speaker 1>M scared of being not even real necessarily being rejected,

0:33:35.600 --> 0:33:38.680
<v Speaker 1>but just not being loved. Okay, I fear I fear

0:33:38.720 --> 0:33:41.040
<v Speaker 1>death like I don't like as a follower of Jesus,

0:33:41.080 --> 0:33:43.240
<v Speaker 1>like I don't fear death like of course, somebody wants

0:33:43.240 --> 0:33:44.840
<v Speaker 1>to die. But like when my friend in the book

0:33:44.880 --> 0:33:46.760
<v Speaker 1>I talked about my mentor right he passed away, said men,

0:33:46.760 --> 0:33:48.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm ready to go see Jesus. I believe that heaven

0:33:48.920 --> 0:33:52.360
<v Speaker 1>is real and like that that this life is temporary.

0:33:52.400 --> 0:33:54.120
<v Speaker 1>So in our reality, if I believe that the Bible

0:33:54.120 --> 0:33:57.479
<v Speaker 1>says about heaven, that I really shouldn't fear death right,

0:33:57.560 --> 0:33:59.200
<v Speaker 1>that's kind of one thing that people fear. I fear

0:33:59.240 --> 0:34:01.560
<v Speaker 1>death right. Some people feel failure. I'm gonna try, I'm

0:34:01.560 --> 0:34:02.960
<v Speaker 1>gonna feel I don't believe that. I think I'm gonna

0:34:03.000 --> 0:34:04.880
<v Speaker 1>be since I know God gave me gifts to be success.

0:34:04.920 --> 0:34:06.520
<v Speaker 1>I think I can be successful in whatever I do.

0:34:06.680 --> 0:34:08.560
<v Speaker 1>I really believe that it's and it's proven. The track

0:34:08.560 --> 0:34:10.960
<v Speaker 1>record has proven true. The fear that I have is

0:34:11.000 --> 0:34:12.719
<v Speaker 1>not being loved. So you say, what do I Why

0:34:12.719 --> 0:34:15.560
<v Speaker 1>would I not show my wife my true authentic self.

0:34:15.840 --> 0:34:18.760
<v Speaker 1>The reason why is that the she's the person closest

0:34:18.800 --> 0:34:21.080
<v Speaker 1>to me, right Babba talks about it to become one flesh,

0:34:21.440 --> 0:34:27.560
<v Speaker 1>so sexually, emotionally, um physically. She's closest to me. And

0:34:27.600 --> 0:34:31.279
<v Speaker 1>what happens to the person who knows me best knows

0:34:31.320 --> 0:34:34.719
<v Speaker 1>the real me doesn't love that person How devastating is that?

0:34:34.760 --> 0:34:37.239
<v Speaker 1>But what if what if she doesn't love me? Man?

0:34:37.280 --> 0:34:40.759
<v Speaker 1>I relate to that devastating. So this person, the real me,

0:34:41.000 --> 0:34:43.040
<v Speaker 1>will they love me? Will they take me from me?

0:34:43.040 --> 0:34:47.040
<v Speaker 1>Will they accept me from Here's why I know? For me, Well,

0:34:47.080 --> 0:34:49.880
<v Speaker 1>I've struggle. I struggle with the relationship with my folks

0:34:50.920 --> 0:34:54.000
<v Speaker 1>right because of their womb. So, of course, how can

0:34:54.080 --> 0:34:57.000
<v Speaker 1>I manage to have a how can I manage to

0:34:57.040 --> 0:35:00.080
<v Speaker 1>have a god a relationship with my wife? What do

0:35:00.120 --> 0:35:04.000
<v Speaker 1>you mean by a guy? True? Love? Got bit so?

0:35:04.000 --> 0:35:05.680
<v Speaker 1>So some people talk about love like there's like a

0:35:06.120 --> 0:35:10.359
<v Speaker 1>sexual attraction. Okay, okay, I'm look, I'm I'm not even

0:35:10.440 --> 0:35:12.680
<v Speaker 1>talking about the sexual attraction. I'm just talking about sitting

0:35:12.680 --> 0:35:15.040
<v Speaker 1>on the couch watching the movie and being comfortable of

0:35:15.560 --> 0:35:19.960
<v Speaker 1>like if I go for the hug, well she imaginarily

0:35:20.200 --> 0:35:24.480
<v Speaker 1>get up to get something and then come back, and

0:35:24.520 --> 0:35:29.920
<v Speaker 1>then she's sitting possibly with a further away, like I

0:35:30.000 --> 0:35:35.239
<v Speaker 1>watched a movie with you, but don't act like we're good, right,

0:35:35.280 --> 0:35:37.200
<v Speaker 1>and so have it? You know That's what I mean

0:35:37.320 --> 0:35:44.160
<v Speaker 1>by so for me, my first my emotional wound of

0:35:44.400 --> 0:35:49.840
<v Speaker 1>love was because of what my folks, their wounds were

0:35:50.400 --> 0:35:54.720
<v Speaker 1>that I saw and felt rejection, not intentionally, not because

0:35:54.760 --> 0:35:58.960
<v Speaker 1>they intentionally rejected me, but I saw felt that that dynamics.

0:35:59.000 --> 0:36:02.200
<v Speaker 1>So of course when I take that crutch and wound

0:36:02.239 --> 0:36:08.360
<v Speaker 1>into my marriage that I am co dependent. I'm also

0:36:09.680 --> 0:36:17.880
<v Speaker 1>performance base borderline. Hell, now borderline about on the scale

0:36:17.880 --> 0:36:21.800
<v Speaker 1>of one and ten, about a hundred on the perfect

0:36:21.880 --> 0:36:24.560
<v Speaker 1>you know, trying to be perfect. And this is all

0:36:24.600 --> 0:36:27.280
<v Speaker 1>going on in my mind trying to watch this movie.

0:36:28.760 --> 0:36:33.719
<v Speaker 1>H so uh, you know, I think that's I think

0:36:33.760 --> 0:36:39.920
<v Speaker 1>that's awesome. I think that you seen your marriage, you know.

0:36:39.960 --> 0:36:43.440
<v Speaker 1>And I text my wife this morning, this afternoon and

0:36:43.480 --> 0:36:47.560
<v Speaker 1>told her that I feel called that I have to

0:36:47.640 --> 0:36:52.840
<v Speaker 1>build a better friendship with my wife, and I have

0:36:52.920 --> 0:36:56.080
<v Speaker 1>to lead because the easiest thing for me to do

0:36:56.239 --> 0:36:59.840
<v Speaker 1>is like, man, she don't really the whole thing is

0:37:00.000 --> 0:37:06.000
<v Speaker 1>easier not to am I barking up the right tree? Oh? Absolutely, absolutely,

0:37:06.040 --> 0:37:09.040
<v Speaker 1>It's funny you talk about that kind of love. I mean,

0:37:09.080 --> 0:37:11.600
<v Speaker 1>I can't wait till you get to uh, I can't

0:37:11.640 --> 0:37:12.960
<v Speaker 1>wait if you pick the book back up and get

0:37:12.960 --> 0:37:15.000
<v Speaker 1>the chapter twelve. Maybe I just skipped to chapter twelve.

0:37:15.120 --> 0:37:17.759
<v Speaker 1>I think chapter twelve, chapter eleven, it's called a chapter

0:37:17.800 --> 0:37:21.080
<v Speaker 1>about my wife and my wife and my relationship. Um,

0:37:21.120 --> 0:37:22.799
<v Speaker 1>and that kind of love that a god they love

0:37:22.840 --> 0:37:25.040
<v Speaker 1>you're talking about, that love that doesn't care about anything.

0:37:25.400 --> 0:37:27.200
<v Speaker 1>Going back to the story, I'm sitting down with my

0:37:27.239 --> 0:37:29.160
<v Speaker 1>friend and saying and he looks at me, and I'm like,

0:37:29.200 --> 0:37:30.600
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what's going on. He says, I'm afraid

0:37:30.680 --> 0:37:34.080
<v Speaker 1>what happens when you retire. As he's saying this, as

0:37:34.080 --> 0:37:36.319
<v Speaker 1>I'm like sharing with him what was going on in

0:37:36.320 --> 0:37:39.400
<v Speaker 1>my life, like I'm I'm, I start to cry. And

0:37:39.440 --> 0:37:40.920
<v Speaker 1>this dude had never seen this side of me, right,

0:37:40.920 --> 0:37:43.959
<v Speaker 1>because everyone who had seen that usually it's like, oh, Sam,

0:37:44.040 --> 0:37:47.800
<v Speaker 1>million dollars, smile, got it all together, looking good, playing football.

0:37:49.040 --> 0:37:51.040
<v Speaker 1>And we worked together. He and I had worked together,

0:37:51.400 --> 0:37:54.320
<v Speaker 1>like we don't. He helped me build businesses whatever. And

0:37:54.480 --> 0:37:57.879
<v Speaker 1>he saw me in my tears crying as he's sharing this,

0:37:58.160 --> 0:38:00.319
<v Speaker 1>and he says, um, he says two things, says the saying.

0:38:00.440 --> 0:38:03.240
<v Speaker 1>Number one, this is how this book even came about.

0:38:03.239 --> 0:38:06.600
<v Speaker 1>He said, he said, maybe God is writing a book

0:38:06.640 --> 0:38:10.239
<v Speaker 1>in your life, and you may only be on chapter two.

0:38:10.680 --> 0:38:13.720
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmm, that's what he said. And and and he paused,

0:38:13.719 --> 0:38:15.120
<v Speaker 1>and I look up. I kind of wiped some of

0:38:15.120 --> 0:38:19.839
<v Speaker 1>the tears away and he says, and oh, by the way, Sam,

0:38:19.880 --> 0:38:24.480
<v Speaker 1>it's nice to see you. M it's nice to see you.

0:38:25.480 --> 0:38:30.200
<v Speaker 1>And I'm like, wait, what what do you mean it's

0:38:30.280 --> 0:38:31.920
<v Speaker 1>nice to see I didn't say, but if my my

0:38:31.960 --> 0:38:33.480
<v Speaker 1>face is saying, what do you mean? It's nice to

0:38:33.480 --> 0:38:35.839
<v Speaker 1>see me? Says Sam. I've known you for eight nine years,

0:38:35.840 --> 0:38:38.719
<v Speaker 1>since you came to the NFL, all I've seen was

0:38:38.800 --> 0:38:42.040
<v Speaker 1>this side of perfection. I've never seen this side of you.

0:38:42.120 --> 0:38:45.400
<v Speaker 1>But it's good to know that you are human. M.

0:38:47.000 --> 0:38:50.520
<v Speaker 1>That you're human because we trained like robots. M hm.

0:38:51.520 --> 0:38:56.640
<v Speaker 1>That's not just in football, not just in but you

0:38:56.680 --> 0:38:59.319
<v Speaker 1>see what I said. I said we we trained like

0:38:59.440 --> 0:39:03.160
<v Speaker 1>robots men because we all are built to be problem

0:39:03.280 --> 0:39:07.640
<v Speaker 1>to fix the problem, to screw in the last screw, yeah,

0:39:08.080 --> 0:39:12.799
<v Speaker 1>right to to you know, use the wrench, get it all,

0:39:13.000 --> 0:39:15.799
<v Speaker 1>to fix all the issues. Yeah, we're naturally fixers. But

0:39:15.880 --> 0:39:18.680
<v Speaker 1>also I believe that every men and women struggle with

0:39:18.880 --> 0:39:22.799
<v Speaker 1>showing their authentic self. And then if you have enough

0:39:22.800 --> 0:39:28.200
<v Speaker 1>water under the bridge, it will really say that bridge. Yes,

0:39:28.640 --> 0:39:33.960
<v Speaker 1>it will make it. At times you gotta hunker down, unpassable. Yes, Well,

0:39:34.000 --> 0:39:36.840
<v Speaker 1>here's the thing we're having this conversation. Right, nice to

0:39:36.880 --> 0:39:39.759
<v Speaker 1>see you. He actually recommended I talked to a counselor.

0:39:40.520 --> 0:39:42.800
<v Speaker 1>That's a good brother. Therapist, that's a good brother. In

0:39:42.840 --> 0:39:45.480
<v Speaker 1>mind you I like, I'm my dad is a therapist.

0:39:45.520 --> 0:39:47.040
<v Speaker 1>My dad's a counsel so I kind of know he's

0:39:47.080 --> 0:39:49.640
<v Speaker 1>a Merritt counselor, so I kind of know, feel like

0:39:49.640 --> 0:39:51.480
<v Speaker 1>I know what they're looking for, what to stay away from?

0:39:51.520 --> 0:39:52.960
<v Speaker 1>Whatever is? I never really you know what, I never

0:39:52.960 --> 0:39:59.640
<v Speaker 1>really In other words, that you feel when you went

0:39:59.719 --> 0:40:02.120
<v Speaker 1>talk man, when he first recommended that you go see

0:40:02.120 --> 0:40:04.640
<v Speaker 1>a therapist, how did that make you feel in that moment? Well,

0:40:04.680 --> 0:40:07.680
<v Speaker 1>at that moment, it was loved. I knew he loved me, because, Bro,

0:40:07.840 --> 0:40:09.440
<v Speaker 1>my marriage is about I felt like my mayor the

0:40:09.440 --> 0:40:11.640
<v Speaker 1>way I was acting, my marriage would have been in

0:40:11.640 --> 0:40:14.560
<v Speaker 1>the tank, right, my relationship with my kids, no, I

0:40:14.560 --> 0:40:16.759
<v Speaker 1>would have no friends, no nothing. I mean all these

0:40:16.760 --> 0:40:20.319
<v Speaker 1>things he has successful in money and thank nothing. And

0:40:20.400 --> 0:40:22.839
<v Speaker 1>so that I felt like that was the kindest thing

0:40:24.040 --> 0:40:26.520
<v Speaker 1>anyone could have done for me. And you know what,

0:40:27.080 --> 0:40:29.440
<v Speaker 1>I said, yes, I said yes. And so the very

0:40:29.480 --> 0:40:33.400
<v Speaker 1>next week, which is the dudes first opening, Um, we

0:40:33.400 --> 0:40:37.920
<v Speaker 1>actually reported a training camp that night. That morning in Bourbon, Illinois,

0:40:38.160 --> 0:40:41.200
<v Speaker 1>right two hours away from Chicago. That morning, I'm up,

0:40:42.840 --> 0:40:46.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm up in uh I remember what the what? Forty

0:40:46.120 --> 0:40:48.759
<v Speaker 1>minutes worth of the city in Barrington, Illinois, sitting in

0:40:48.800 --> 0:40:53.799
<v Speaker 1>the council's office the first time in my life. We're

0:40:53.800 --> 0:40:56.399
<v Speaker 1>sitting down and I'm in mind you right, Okay, I'm here,

0:40:56.400 --> 0:40:58.480
<v Speaker 1>but let me just get in and get out right, perfect.

0:40:58.600 --> 0:41:00.759
<v Speaker 1>I got you don't You don't know me, but I'm

0:41:00.800 --> 0:41:02.719
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying I got this handle right. Let me get

0:41:02.719 --> 0:41:04.319
<v Speaker 1>my session or two and check it off the list.

0:41:04.719 --> 0:41:07.600
<v Speaker 1>That's what I thought. I walk in that meeting. He

0:41:07.600 --> 0:41:09.279
<v Speaker 1>asked me a couple of questions, and he asked me

0:41:09.640 --> 0:41:11.400
<v Speaker 1>one specific question. He said, hey, Sam, I got a

0:41:11.480 --> 0:41:14.600
<v Speaker 1>question for you. What do you do when you get angry?

0:41:17.120 --> 0:41:18.640
<v Speaker 1>My answer is simple, So I just I just try

0:41:18.719 --> 0:41:21.120
<v Speaker 1>not to get angry. But then he asked me, he said, no, Sam,

0:41:21.160 --> 0:41:22.600
<v Speaker 1>well you know what do you do when you get angry?

0:41:22.600 --> 0:41:25.000
<v Speaker 1>I said, I just really just trying not to get angry.

0:41:26.480 --> 0:41:31.280
<v Speaker 1>He looks at me, he said, Sam, everybody gets angry,

0:41:32.760 --> 0:41:38.080
<v Speaker 1>So what do you do when you get angry? And

0:41:38.120 --> 0:41:40.759
<v Speaker 1>once again, now a week later, now in front of

0:41:40.760 --> 0:41:48.760
<v Speaker 1>a counselor I began to cry. Mhm. Why I cried

0:41:48.960 --> 0:41:59.840
<v Speaker 1>because he he wasn't gonna let me. I cried because

0:42:00.000 --> 0:42:03.040
<v Speaker 1>I was about to be seen mm hm. And and

0:42:03.440 --> 0:42:07.439
<v Speaker 1>he wasn't gonna There was no escaping that moment, right

0:42:07.719 --> 0:42:09.399
<v Speaker 1>Usually like you're talking about, Okay, I gotta go, I'm

0:42:09.400 --> 0:42:10.880
<v Speaker 1>going to crack, i'n go, I'm getting my car on

0:42:10.960 --> 0:42:13.080
<v Speaker 1>a drive, I'm whatever on. Want a second, hold on

0:42:13.080 --> 0:42:16.759
<v Speaker 1>a second, because I don't want to miss this. You

0:42:16.840 --> 0:42:20.439
<v Speaker 1>struggle to answer this right now. And here's the thing

0:42:20.560 --> 0:42:23.399
<v Speaker 1>I want to. I want to I want to hug

0:42:23.440 --> 0:42:27.719
<v Speaker 1>you on this. You have written a book. You are

0:42:29.239 --> 0:42:32.520
<v Speaker 1>the son of a pastor, son of a counselor, and

0:42:32.600 --> 0:42:36.960
<v Speaker 1>yet you are just like the rest of us, flawed, human,

0:42:37.440 --> 0:42:41.839
<v Speaker 1>non robotic, and you didn't want to reveal. Even after

0:42:42.200 --> 0:42:45.480
<v Speaker 1>publishing and accomplishing what you've accomplished through the Council and

0:42:45.640 --> 0:42:49.760
<v Speaker 1>going through the Council, you still kind of tiptote running around,

0:42:50.800 --> 0:42:59.200
<v Speaker 1>and I appreciate it. Don't don't let are questioning because

0:42:59.200 --> 0:43:04.480
<v Speaker 1>you're giving us old Don't let that deter you from

0:43:04.560 --> 0:43:08.080
<v Speaker 1>speaking the truth. Because somebody else is listening to this

0:43:09.200 --> 0:43:11.799
<v Speaker 1>who does not have the advantages or the head start

0:43:11.840 --> 0:43:13.840
<v Speaker 1>on life that you have, but they still got the insecurities.

0:43:13.880 --> 0:43:19.319
<v Speaker 1>They still have their insecurities. Mm hmm. That's real. And

0:43:19.320 --> 0:43:20.919
<v Speaker 1>what would you say to that person who still has

0:43:21.040 --> 0:43:26.120
<v Speaker 1>insecurities that that's listening right now because somebody, somebody talk

0:43:26.160 --> 0:43:29.239
<v Speaker 1>to me. Then if nobody talk, if nobody else in

0:43:29.239 --> 0:43:32.440
<v Speaker 1>this room got some insecurities, I I'm not facing on

0:43:32.480 --> 0:43:35.080
<v Speaker 1>the sword. I'm just raising my hand. I gotta hold.

0:43:35.280 --> 0:43:39.319
<v Speaker 1>I'm from North Coost. I got a whole heap of insecurity.

0:43:39.680 --> 0:43:41.480
<v Speaker 1>So what do you tell? What do you tell Smithy

0:43:41.520 --> 0:43:44.719
<v Speaker 1>who has insecurities? Because I have my bank account is good,

0:43:45.560 --> 0:43:51.120
<v Speaker 1>my life is good. But I still question question everything

0:43:51.160 --> 0:43:54.759
<v Speaker 1>I questioned. Maybe I should have made that catch, or

0:43:54.800 --> 0:43:56.719
<v Speaker 1>maybe I should have went to this team, or maybe

0:43:56.760 --> 0:43:58.480
<v Speaker 1>I should have went to Baltimore sooner, or maybe I

0:43:58.480 --> 0:44:01.480
<v Speaker 1>should have said in Carolina. Maybe should have World nine,

0:44:01.480 --> 0:44:04.640
<v Speaker 1>Maybe I should have warred him? Right? What tell me?

0:44:06.400 --> 0:44:16.959
<v Speaker 1>Why is my insecurity? Okay? God takes the light in you.

0:44:20.239 --> 0:44:27.280
<v Speaker 1>God like God enjoys being around you, like he loves

0:44:28.320 --> 0:44:31.360
<v Speaker 1>when you spend time with him. He loves spending time

0:44:31.360 --> 0:44:35.400
<v Speaker 1>with you. He loves you, all of you. The insecurities,

0:44:35.480 --> 0:44:40.200
<v Speaker 1>the doubt, the shame, the pain, the fear, the trauma.

0:44:40.360 --> 0:44:43.040
<v Speaker 1>He loves all of you. And know he didn't intend

0:44:43.480 --> 0:44:46.400
<v Speaker 1>for the trauma to happen or the shame to happen. No,

0:44:48.040 --> 0:44:50.319
<v Speaker 1>but he'll still use it for his glory and for

0:44:51.280 --> 0:44:54.600
<v Speaker 1>you're good, for you're good, and it won't stop there,

0:44:54.600 --> 0:44:56.800
<v Speaker 1>because hes gonna He's gonna use you as a conduit

0:44:57.320 --> 0:45:00.560
<v Speaker 1>for other people's good. All the trauma, the pain, the

0:45:00.640 --> 0:45:04.080
<v Speaker 1>fearity insecurity, the doubt, the shame that you've been through,

0:45:04.120 --> 0:45:07.839
<v Speaker 1>that you've shouldered because you have broad shoulders. Right, God

0:45:07.880 --> 0:45:09.680
<v Speaker 1>gave you that for a reason, all of that. He

0:45:09.719 --> 0:45:12.040
<v Speaker 1>hadn't met mean for you to carry it, intend for

0:45:12.080 --> 0:45:14.279
<v Speaker 1>you to carry, but you decided to carry. And that's okay.

0:45:14.560 --> 0:45:18.279
<v Speaker 1>But you carried it, and now someone else doesn't have to. Right.

0:45:18.360 --> 0:45:20.200
<v Speaker 1>But in the midst of that, right, it's not about them,

0:45:20.200 --> 0:45:22.120
<v Speaker 1>It's about you. In the midst of that, God wants

0:45:22.160 --> 0:45:24.040
<v Speaker 1>you to know that he is not only is he

0:45:24.120 --> 0:45:28.080
<v Speaker 1>for you, but he likes you, like he really really

0:45:28.800 --> 0:45:31.720
<v Speaker 1>likes you. It's not like, oh, I love you because

0:45:31.719 --> 0:45:33.680
<v Speaker 1>I have to love you, or you're my son like

0:45:33.719 --> 0:45:35.879
<v Speaker 1>I was like, no, sybybe I like you. I love

0:45:35.920 --> 0:45:38.839
<v Speaker 1>the way you compete. I love your heart. I love

0:45:38.840 --> 0:45:40.880
<v Speaker 1>the way you love people well. No people don't know this.

0:45:40.960 --> 0:45:43.840
<v Speaker 1>You love people well and I love that about you.

0:45:44.000 --> 0:45:45.680
<v Speaker 1>And no, you don't have to be ashamed about that.

0:45:45.800 --> 0:45:48.840
<v Speaker 1>People need that. I try to push people away. I

0:45:48.920 --> 0:45:55.080
<v Speaker 1>try to make it, try to make myself vable, unapproachable. No.

0:45:55.239 --> 0:45:58.440
<v Speaker 1>The key word, he sam said, is But the thing is,

0:45:58.480 --> 0:46:01.919
<v Speaker 1>there's nothing you can do that will make God love

0:46:02.000 --> 0:46:04.680
<v Speaker 1>you any less, right like, even as you try to push.

0:46:04.680 --> 0:46:06.600
<v Speaker 1>And I experienced this firsthand. But it's not about me.

0:46:06.760 --> 0:46:11.839
<v Speaker 1>Let me not go to me right now. But there's

0:46:11.840 --> 0:46:14.759
<v Speaker 1>a song says he saw the best in me all

0:46:14.840 --> 0:46:19.960
<v Speaker 1>right when everyone else around could only see the worst

0:46:20.000 --> 0:46:28.200
<v Speaker 1>in me. He saw the best in me when everyone

0:46:28.320 --> 0:46:37.440
<v Speaker 1>else around could only see the worst in me. And

0:46:37.560 --> 0:46:43.000
<v Speaker 1>he's mine and um his. And it doesn't matter what

0:46:43.200 --> 0:46:50.279
<v Speaker 1>I did. He only sees me for for who I am.

0:46:50.360 --> 0:46:54.400
<v Speaker 1>No matter what you have done, God sees you for

0:46:54.600 --> 0:46:58.719
<v Speaker 1>who you are. And so what I would say to

0:46:58.760 --> 0:47:03.759
<v Speaker 1>you is I would say, get to know Jesus, spend

0:47:03.800 --> 0:47:06.080
<v Speaker 1>time with them. I didn't say go to church. I

0:47:06.120 --> 0:47:10.840
<v Speaker 1>didn't say what get to know Jesus? Open up that word.

0:47:11.680 --> 0:47:13.880
<v Speaker 1>Not with your wife, not with the kids, by yourself,

0:47:14.440 --> 0:47:17.719
<v Speaker 1>with you and God. Talk to him. Oh and by

0:47:17.760 --> 0:47:20.439
<v Speaker 1>the way, listen to him. Oh and by the way,

0:47:20.640 --> 0:47:23.319
<v Speaker 1>let him love you because he sees the best in you.

0:47:23.880 --> 0:47:26.120
<v Speaker 1>And yes, other people, they may see the worst, and

0:47:26.120 --> 0:47:30.239
<v Speaker 1>that's okay, that's okay, because it's not about them. Right

0:47:30.360 --> 0:47:33.640
<v Speaker 1>there there, little aunts, this is the creator of the universe. Mhm.

0:47:35.000 --> 0:47:37.319
<v Speaker 1>So yes, the insecurities will come, but I'll remind you

0:47:37.360 --> 0:47:43.320
<v Speaker 1>to breathe. Breathe Number one. Number two, be kind to yourself.

0:47:43.360 --> 0:47:45.760
<v Speaker 1>I learned that from the counselor be kind to yourself.

0:47:45.760 --> 0:47:48.840
<v Speaker 1>That little kid in you. You don't want anybody to

0:47:48.880 --> 0:47:52.120
<v Speaker 1>see that you try to protect and bow up and flex. Right,

0:47:52.160 --> 0:47:56.640
<v Speaker 1>that little kid, He's still there, and God loves him.

0:47:56.760 --> 0:48:00.879
<v Speaker 1>God loves him, and I understand you want to protect him,

0:48:01.080 --> 0:48:04.680
<v Speaker 1>and that's that's okay. That's that's that's that's okay. But

0:48:04.760 --> 0:48:07.360
<v Speaker 1>sooner or later, and as you're realizing, right your adult

0:48:07.680 --> 0:48:10.759
<v Speaker 1>this is you know, that adult, like the Steve, the

0:48:10.840 --> 0:48:14.160
<v Speaker 1>grown adult will step in and and take the job

0:48:14.200 --> 0:48:17.360
<v Speaker 1>and protect that little kid inside of you. But the

0:48:17.400 --> 0:48:19.680
<v Speaker 1>way that happens is why we gotta breathe. We gotta breathe.

0:48:19.680 --> 0:48:22.640
<v Speaker 1>Gotta let it go. I gotta let it go. M

0:48:24.760 --> 0:48:29.000
<v Speaker 1>gotta let it go. You accept payment plans for counsel.

0:48:31.880 --> 0:48:34.319
<v Speaker 1>I think it's about that time. Just take a little breather.

0:48:34.920 --> 0:48:38.560
<v Speaker 1>Good do it, good, do it. Let's get down to

0:48:38.600 --> 0:48:42.960
<v Speaker 1>do it good. Hey Gerard, why did you get that

0:48:43.040 --> 0:48:45.640
<v Speaker 1>T shirt? You mean this thing? Oh? Yes, I got

0:48:45.680 --> 0:48:47.680
<v Speaker 1>it from cut to a podcast dot com where we

0:48:47.760 --> 0:48:50.839
<v Speaker 1>have exclusive merchandise. Shout out to our guys at seven

0:48:50.920 --> 0:48:52.879
<v Speaker 1>or four shot. But yeah, you can go on, buy

0:48:52.920 --> 0:48:55.239
<v Speaker 1>you a T shirt, Subscribe to us wherever you listen

0:48:55.280 --> 0:48:59.600
<v Speaker 1>to podcasts. Explain to Sam what our Deep three is.

0:49:00.120 --> 0:49:03.440
<v Speaker 1>So our deep three Sam is basically a series of questions,

0:49:03.440 --> 0:49:06.879
<v Speaker 1>three questions that will ask you that just basically takes

0:49:06.920 --> 0:49:10.800
<v Speaker 1>us to a deeper level. Who is Sam beyond your jersey,

0:49:10.880 --> 0:49:13.239
<v Speaker 1>behind your helmet? So Smitty give him the first deep

0:49:13.239 --> 0:49:17.840
<v Speaker 1>three questions? Are doing your playing days? You were striving

0:49:17.880 --> 0:49:25.640
<v Speaker 1>for excellence or perfection, all perfection? And how did that

0:49:26.080 --> 0:49:29.600
<v Speaker 1>hurt you now that you're looking back on it? So

0:49:29.640 --> 0:49:34.440
<v Speaker 1>it hurt me tremendously until that moment where I realized

0:49:34.480 --> 0:49:36.640
<v Speaker 1>I could be me. I could be me because I

0:49:36.680 --> 0:49:40.400
<v Speaker 1>was realizing, like you said, like Bro, it was one

0:49:40.440 --> 0:49:43.040
<v Speaker 1>year team playing with Arizona. Like the coaches were telling

0:49:43.080 --> 0:49:46.080
<v Speaker 1>me I was a bad player essentially, and I'm like, no,

0:49:46.200 --> 0:49:47.799
<v Speaker 1>I'm not a bad player. I had to go back

0:49:47.800 --> 0:49:49.799
<v Speaker 1>and watch the field myself because I with what I

0:49:49.840 --> 0:49:51.080
<v Speaker 1>was doing. I was trying to do it their way.

0:49:51.320 --> 0:49:53.839
<v Speaker 1>I'm on the edge. Coach, Look, I kept contained. Look

0:49:53.840 --> 0:49:55.680
<v Speaker 1>you told me to be outside. Look, look, look I

0:49:55.719 --> 0:49:57.960
<v Speaker 1>did my job. And all of a sudden, ten with

0:49:58.040 --> 0:50:01.080
<v Speaker 1>ten games in, it's like, well we we're losing games. Well,

0:50:01.080 --> 0:50:03.920
<v Speaker 1>anybody could anybody could keep you? Anybody, bro, coach, you

0:50:03.960 --> 0:50:05.120
<v Speaker 1>told me to do that? I thought you see know

0:50:05.160 --> 0:50:07.200
<v Speaker 1>what I mean? No, go make plays? Oh now I

0:50:07.280 --> 0:50:09.440
<v Speaker 1>make plays. But before you're giving me check marks? So

0:50:09.480 --> 0:50:12.279
<v Speaker 1>what change you're getting pressure now will be the DC,

0:50:12.480 --> 0:50:14.719
<v Speaker 1>you know what I mean. So so anyways that it

0:50:14.840 --> 0:50:18.120
<v Speaker 1>hurt me tremendously early on, trying to people please right

0:50:18.160 --> 0:50:20.280
<v Speaker 1>the Bible Times about it. You can't you know you

0:50:20.360 --> 0:50:27.400
<v Speaker 1>can't serve two masters, right, Damn that coaches in Tampa

0:50:27.440 --> 0:50:31.160
<v Speaker 1>Bay scrowing that up right now, any man, Well I

0:50:31.200 --> 0:50:35.080
<v Speaker 1>told you I'm not bringing up coaches, manau I did together.

0:50:40.200 --> 0:50:42.560
<v Speaker 1>But yeah, so I was striving for perfection and then.

0:50:42.680 --> 0:50:44.719
<v Speaker 1>But later in my career, I think I started now,

0:50:44.760 --> 0:50:46.759
<v Speaker 1>I think I started to shrive for excellence. I started saying,

0:50:46.760 --> 0:50:48.839
<v Speaker 1>you know what, God, I'm doing this for you. I'm

0:50:48.880 --> 0:50:50.759
<v Speaker 1>not doing it for them, because what happens is I

0:50:50.760 --> 0:50:53.399
<v Speaker 1>started doing it for my coaches, and either I get

0:50:53.440 --> 0:50:56.759
<v Speaker 1>the approval that I want and and it doesn't feel me,

0:50:57.160 --> 0:50:58.959
<v Speaker 1>or I don't get it and I'm like, why aren't

0:50:58.960 --> 0:51:00.640
<v Speaker 1>they giving me? You know why I'm getting, you know,

0:51:00.719 --> 0:51:02.400
<v Speaker 1>game ball or what you know what I mean? And

0:51:02.440 --> 0:51:04.600
<v Speaker 1>so I said, you know what, forget y'all, I'm doing

0:51:04.600 --> 0:51:06.719
<v Speaker 1>this for God. And I started playing super super well,

0:51:06.760 --> 0:51:08.640
<v Speaker 1>even even and even if it was a few plays

0:51:08.680 --> 0:51:12.960
<v Speaker 1>or a lot of plays. So, Sam, your your husband, believer,

0:51:13.120 --> 0:51:15.920
<v Speaker 1>your football player. Now you're an author. How do you

0:51:15.960 --> 0:51:23.040
<v Speaker 1>handle disappointment? You don't want to know I do, I

0:51:23.080 --> 0:51:25.880
<v Speaker 1>guess you that's why you asked g honestly, dude, like,

0:51:26.520 --> 0:51:29.840
<v Speaker 1>I don't do well with disappointment. I really don't. I

0:51:29.880 --> 0:51:32.760
<v Speaker 1>get like sad, you know what I mean, I'll get sad.

0:51:32.800 --> 0:51:35.480
<v Speaker 1>I'll be like, man like, what did it? Why did not?

0:51:36.600 --> 0:51:37.960
<v Speaker 1>Why didn't it go the way I thought it was

0:51:37.960 --> 0:51:40.200
<v Speaker 1>gonna go? So kind of even as I'm saying now,

0:51:40.239 --> 0:51:42.359
<v Speaker 1>I could feel my heart getting sad. You know what

0:51:42.360 --> 0:51:44.600
<v Speaker 1>I mean, Because I'm thinking about some of these times,

0:51:44.640 --> 0:51:47.720
<v Speaker 1>whether it was football or even book stuff or whatever,

0:51:47.840 --> 0:51:50.759
<v Speaker 1>things that could be so great, right, and I'll get sad.

0:51:50.960 --> 0:51:54.400
<v Speaker 1>And that's how I That's how in the past handle it.

0:51:54.400 --> 0:51:59.279
<v Speaker 1>I'm what I'm working towards. Um. There's a verse that says,

0:51:59.360 --> 0:52:03.759
<v Speaker 1>like in everything, give thanks right, and everything give things right.

0:52:03.760 --> 0:52:06.799
<v Speaker 1>There's another verse that says, Philippines four, I think six,

0:52:06.840 --> 0:52:09.240
<v Speaker 1>don't be anxious about anything, but in everything, don't somebody

0:52:09.239 --> 0:52:13.280
<v Speaker 1>slow down. Don't be anxious about anything, but in everything,

0:52:13.440 --> 0:52:17.759
<v Speaker 1>through prayer and petition, like asking, asking, asking right, and

0:52:17.960 --> 0:52:22.399
<v Speaker 1>with thanksgiving, let your request be ma known to God,

0:52:23.320 --> 0:52:27.080
<v Speaker 1>and the peace of God, what surpasses all understanding, will

0:52:27.120 --> 0:52:31.000
<v Speaker 1>guard your hearts and minds. In Christ Jesus, how do

0:52:31.040 --> 0:52:33.799
<v Speaker 1>you handle disappointment? How do you handle anxiety? What I'm

0:52:33.840 --> 0:52:37.640
<v Speaker 1>learning to do is to be thankful. So the biggest

0:52:37.640 --> 0:52:41.080
<v Speaker 1>things I'm learning to do is instead of being sad

0:52:41.120 --> 0:52:45.360
<v Speaker 1>about whatever expectation that I felt wasn't met, I'm learned

0:52:45.400 --> 0:52:47.600
<v Speaker 1>to say thank you for whatever I do have, and

0:52:47.640 --> 0:52:50.200
<v Speaker 1>even if it wasn't met, at that time, man, God,

0:52:50.280 --> 0:52:52.640
<v Speaker 1>thank you, thank you. And then I start remembering, oh wow,

0:52:52.680 --> 0:52:54.520
<v Speaker 1>I got a lot. You know how Manna, how gonna bothered?

0:52:54.640 --> 0:52:56.279
<v Speaker 1>You got a lot? I got a lot. I got

0:52:56.320 --> 0:52:59.040
<v Speaker 1>a lot. You know what I mean? Thank you? You

0:52:59.040 --> 0:53:00.680
<v Speaker 1>know what I mean? And so that, and then also

0:53:00.760 --> 0:53:03.720
<v Speaker 1>talking for me talking. If you ever cast me not talking,

0:53:04.120 --> 0:53:05.560
<v Speaker 1>you know, I'm probably not in a good place, you

0:53:05.600 --> 0:53:07.120
<v Speaker 1>know what I mean. And then talking or even share

0:53:07.160 --> 0:53:08.759
<v Speaker 1>with my wife right or the counselor with a you're

0:53:08.760 --> 0:53:10.560
<v Speaker 1>talking my wife, you're going that out sad about something,

0:53:11.000 --> 0:53:12.600
<v Speaker 1>you know. I was doing my first show and I

0:53:12.600 --> 0:53:13.759
<v Speaker 1>was like, man, I feel like I did a good

0:53:13.800 --> 0:53:15.359
<v Speaker 1>I know I did it good, but I didn't tell

0:53:15.400 --> 0:53:17.160
<v Speaker 1>my agent that. You know that, I really love it

0:53:17.200 --> 0:53:19.600
<v Speaker 1>and I am I gonna get more opportunities. She said,

0:53:19.640 --> 0:53:22.480
<v Speaker 1>just call them, Just call your agent, tell him, tell

0:53:22.560 --> 0:53:23.759
<v Speaker 1>him what you want to tell. And I was like, oh,

0:53:23.800 --> 0:53:25.600
<v Speaker 1>really I can do that, ye know what I mean?

0:53:25.640 --> 0:53:27.479
<v Speaker 1>Like the enemy wants you to think that all hope

0:53:27.520 --> 0:53:30.080
<v Speaker 1>is lost. Enemy the devil right like wants you to

0:53:30.120 --> 0:53:32.000
<v Speaker 1>think all hope is lost. And see you should have

0:53:32.080 --> 0:53:35.959
<v Speaker 1>changed numbers. Shouldn't than this. My dude I met with said,

0:53:36.239 --> 0:53:41.400
<v Speaker 1>don't shoot on yourself. Don't shoot on yourself. Don't shoot

0:53:41.400 --> 0:53:48.359
<v Speaker 1>on yourself. So what do you think Jerry Price would

0:53:48.360 --> 0:54:12.799
<v Speaker 1>say about your book? Mhm mm hmm. Uh, I think

0:54:12.800 --> 0:54:22.200
<v Speaker 1>he would. Uh. He would be proud of you. Yeah,

0:54:22.280 --> 0:54:25.879
<v Speaker 1>he would be proud of the young man that has

0:54:25.920 --> 0:54:29.440
<v Speaker 1>been on this podcast as has allowed his pain and

0:54:29.560 --> 0:54:34.759
<v Speaker 1>his insecurities to live throughout every essence, every fabric of

0:54:34.800 --> 0:54:37.600
<v Speaker 1>that book to be able to be transparent and be

0:54:37.680 --> 0:54:40.680
<v Speaker 1>open and not to be afraid of the people to

0:54:40.719 --> 0:54:45.200
<v Speaker 1>see the same. The Sam macho, the damaged, the strong,

0:54:45.719 --> 0:54:52.080
<v Speaker 1>the wounded, the worthy, the unfitted. The last thing he

0:54:52.160 --> 0:54:57.080
<v Speaker 1>told me, Um, I'm wiping the tears away from my

0:54:57.080 --> 0:55:00.799
<v Speaker 1>eyes right now. A mind too, bro. The last thing

0:55:00.840 --> 0:55:06.319
<v Speaker 1>he told me, he told me two things. The last

0:55:06.320 --> 0:55:08.240
<v Speaker 1>two things he told me, he said, Number one, Sam

0:55:08.960 --> 0:55:14.759
<v Speaker 1>essentially on his death behead right my mentor my so

0:55:14.840 --> 0:55:18.399
<v Speaker 1>he Uh, he said, the most important thing you can

0:55:18.440 --> 0:55:22.720
<v Speaker 1>do on this earth is to get to know Jesus.

0:55:25.040 --> 0:55:26.960
<v Speaker 1>I don't care about achievement. This dude has done at all.

0:55:27.000 --> 0:55:29.160
<v Speaker 1>This dude was, you know, talking about NFL to due

0:55:29.200 --> 0:55:31.399
<v Speaker 1>was an MLB. As far as counseling all the things

0:55:31.400 --> 0:55:33.320
<v Speaker 1>about the mark to share is all the best baseball

0:55:33.320 --> 0:55:35.680
<v Speaker 1>players like they would sit in his office for marriage

0:55:35.719 --> 0:55:37.399
<v Speaker 1>help and life he help or whatever. It's a man

0:55:37.440 --> 0:55:40.920
<v Speaker 1>among he was a man of God. Mhmm. And he

0:55:41.000 --> 0:55:43.960
<v Speaker 1>said he's my next door neighbor. He was my mentor,

0:55:44.080 --> 0:55:48.120
<v Speaker 1>and he had cancer and it wasn't getting better. And um,

0:55:48.440 --> 0:55:50.399
<v Speaker 1>so he posted a message on Facebook. This is chapter

0:55:50.480 --> 0:55:54.359
<v Speaker 1>one is introduction of the bookcase. You who haven't got

0:55:54.360 --> 0:55:58.080
<v Speaker 1>it yet stopped three. Yeah. He wrote a message on

0:55:58.160 --> 0:56:02.200
<v Speaker 1>face and and I didn't. Here's another part committee He hadn't.

0:56:02.239 --> 0:56:05.440
<v Speaker 1>He had messaged me a few months before during the season,

0:56:06.400 --> 0:56:08.280
<v Speaker 1>but I was busy and I, you know, had stuff

0:56:08.280 --> 0:56:10.880
<v Speaker 1>going on, so I didn't respond. And I respond, Oh,

0:56:10.920 --> 0:56:14.240
<v Speaker 1>you know, I got something. I'll get back to it. Um.

0:56:14.280 --> 0:56:20.040
<v Speaker 1>He posted on Facebook post asking for permission to go,

0:56:22.480 --> 0:56:26.640
<v Speaker 1>permission to go? Tell me to die? He posted on

0:56:26.680 --> 0:56:31.200
<v Speaker 1>Facebook problem Facebook you no, No. He a public message

0:56:31.200 --> 0:56:33.320
<v Speaker 1>on his Facebook page. He's been going through this cancer

0:56:33.360 --> 0:56:37.160
<v Speaker 1>battle for five seven years and it wasn't getting any better.

0:56:37.200 --> 0:56:38.920
<v Speaker 1>This dude knew God, and knew God well. He was

0:56:38.960 --> 0:56:41.719
<v Speaker 1>ready to be go home, seventy some years already to

0:56:41.719 --> 0:56:45.600
<v Speaker 1>go see Jesus. He was ready and he knew it

0:56:45.640 --> 0:56:47.440
<v Speaker 1>was He knew it was his time, so he posted

0:56:47.480 --> 0:56:50.360
<v Speaker 1>on Like a true gentleman, he posted. He shared with

0:56:50.400 --> 0:56:52.000
<v Speaker 1>his friends, Hey guys, I'm ready to go home and

0:56:52.040 --> 0:56:54.719
<v Speaker 1>see Jesus. Um, I just want to let y'all know

0:56:54.840 --> 0:56:57.640
<v Speaker 1>I want to see if I get your permission. And

0:56:57.680 --> 0:57:01.279
<v Speaker 1>so my wife saw that post, said, hey, have you

0:57:01.320 --> 0:57:03.239
<v Speaker 1>called Jerry? Was like, yeah, I'll get to him. No, no no, no, like,

0:57:03.280 --> 0:57:07.319
<v Speaker 1>have you called Jerry? She shares the post with me.

0:57:07.360 --> 0:57:10.640
<v Speaker 1>I called immediately, and this man like this, you know,

0:57:10.680 --> 0:57:12.600
<v Speaker 1>he's like you man like in your face, will tell

0:57:12.719 --> 0:57:14.799
<v Speaker 1>like it is, don't give a crap what you think

0:57:14.880 --> 0:57:20.480
<v Speaker 1>or what you say. Well tell you the truth. A gregarious, energetic, strong,

0:57:20.640 --> 0:57:22.920
<v Speaker 1>And now we're on the phone. And he was weak.

0:57:24.760 --> 0:57:28.560
<v Speaker 1>He wasn't it was it was like a shell of him.

0:57:28.600 --> 0:57:31.240
<v Speaker 1>And so I said, Jerry, he said, you know, I said,

0:57:31.280 --> 0:57:32.320
<v Speaker 1>I don't want I don't know what you want me

0:57:32.400 --> 0:57:35.640
<v Speaker 1>to tell you. And you said, I'm ready to go

0:57:35.640 --> 0:57:37.600
<v Speaker 1>see see Jesus. That's like, what do you do? What

0:57:37.600 --> 0:57:40.360
<v Speaker 1>do you I want to say? Um? You know, I said,

0:57:40.400 --> 0:57:41.640
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what I want to tell you, but

0:57:41.680 --> 0:57:45.480
<v Speaker 1>I do need something from me. I need some some advice, anything,

0:57:46.360 --> 0:57:51.080
<v Speaker 1>anything you could tell me about life, about deaf anything

0:57:51.120 --> 0:57:54.760
<v Speaker 1>you could tell me, what would it be? And the

0:57:54.840 --> 0:57:56.760
<v Speaker 1>last two things that I ever heard from my friend.

0:57:56.760 --> 0:57:58.600
<v Speaker 1>He said, Number one, the most important thing you can

0:57:58.640 --> 0:58:02.680
<v Speaker 1>do on this earth is to get to know Jesus intimately.

0:58:04.040 --> 0:58:07.160
<v Speaker 1>He said, God takes no greater joy than when you

0:58:07.280 --> 0:58:11.440
<v Speaker 1>get to know his son. Get to know Jesus intimately,

0:58:11.440 --> 0:58:14.120
<v Speaker 1>and you will get no greater joy. Many the last

0:58:14.120 --> 0:58:18.280
<v Speaker 1>few nights mornings, I'm getting up um and getting to

0:58:18.320 --> 0:58:22.000
<v Speaker 1>know Jesus, spending time in the Word of God, reading

0:58:22.160 --> 0:58:24.200
<v Speaker 1>just reading, not a verse or two, just trying to

0:58:24.240 --> 0:58:28.320
<v Speaker 1>open up and see what happens, and praying and I'm learning,

0:58:28.360 --> 0:58:30.600
<v Speaker 1>Oh wow, God really does love me, he says, asking

0:58:30.680 --> 0:58:32.720
<v Speaker 1>to be given to you? Why so God can receive

0:58:32.760 --> 0:58:34.960
<v Speaker 1>the glory. Whatever you want, he says, if it's in

0:58:35.040 --> 0:58:36.880
<v Speaker 1>God's will, you ask for it. Why do you want

0:58:36.920 --> 0:58:39.880
<v Speaker 1>me to ask for Because I love you, I literally

0:58:39.920 --> 0:58:44.480
<v Speaker 1>love you, he said, get to know Jesus intimately. And

0:58:44.560 --> 0:58:48.880
<v Speaker 1>the second thing, the last thing that he said, he said,

0:58:48.960 --> 0:58:55.400
<v Speaker 1>you are worth getting to know. Never forget that you

0:58:55.480 --> 0:59:07.440
<v Speaker 1>are worth kay okay, he said, you are worth getting

0:59:07.440 --> 0:59:10.360
<v Speaker 1>to know. And so I think what Jerry would tell me.

0:59:10.400 --> 0:59:13.000
<v Speaker 1>Now and the book is out and stay well done

0:59:15.720 --> 0:59:29.120
<v Speaker 1>and there's more to come. When's the last time you

0:59:29.120 --> 0:59:33.760
<v Speaker 1>shoot it on yourself? Man? Several times? About ten times today.

0:59:35.280 --> 0:59:37.920
<v Speaker 1>You know it's just for me. It started this morning,

0:59:38.000 --> 0:59:40.560
<v Speaker 1>just that run and I'm doing, you know, going through

0:59:40.600 --> 0:59:44.640
<v Speaker 1>that process being uncomfortable. Um, you know a process of

0:59:44.720 --> 0:59:50.720
<v Speaker 1>changing the the butterfly, the calipillar, all that stuff. It's

0:59:50.840 --> 0:59:52.920
<v Speaker 1>it's it's tough. And you know you look up and

0:59:52.920 --> 0:59:55.720
<v Speaker 1>you gotta stop, watch your time and you look up

0:59:55.800 --> 0:59:57.920
<v Speaker 1>and said you figure out for the minute run you

0:59:57.960 --> 1:00:00.400
<v Speaker 1>can still got twenty five minutes of what are you

1:00:00.440 --> 1:00:03.960
<v Speaker 1>gonna do? Right? For me, running has become that place

1:00:04.000 --> 1:00:06.200
<v Speaker 1>where I get to examine myself. I get to examine

1:00:06.200 --> 1:00:09.240
<v Speaker 1>my heart. I'm up, the house is quiet. You know,

1:00:09.280 --> 1:00:11.440
<v Speaker 1>I spend my time in the world word, but it

1:00:11.560 --> 1:00:14.520
<v Speaker 1>also telling me how I have to with Sam is

1:00:15.760 --> 1:00:20.040
<v Speaker 1>help your communities. For my desire now is leave an imprint,

1:00:20.840 --> 1:00:25.840
<v Speaker 1>Leave a legacy for my family, not leave a financial legacy.

1:00:26.080 --> 1:00:29.520
<v Speaker 1>Believe something that when you imparted in them. Yeah yeah,

1:00:29.880 --> 1:00:33.280
<v Speaker 1>that's good. Yeah, Well, I mean for me, taken away

1:00:33.280 --> 1:00:37.040
<v Speaker 1>from don't shoot on yourself is what should I be doing?

1:00:37.320 --> 1:00:40.720
<v Speaker 1>Looking right, I should be doing this, and that turns

1:00:40.720 --> 1:00:44.080
<v Speaker 1>into the internal battle, Well, I should be I should

1:00:44.080 --> 1:00:47.080
<v Speaker 1>be up earlier, I should be uh spending more time

1:00:47.080 --> 1:00:48.720
<v Speaker 1>with my daughter. I should be spending more time with

1:00:48.800 --> 1:00:51.240
<v Speaker 1>my with my son, with my wife, whatever the case

1:00:51.320 --> 1:00:53.880
<v Speaker 1>may be. So I'm when he said that, it immediately

1:00:53.880 --> 1:00:57.000
<v Speaker 1>took me to the place of I'm always beating myself

1:00:57.080 --> 1:00:59.200
<v Speaker 1>over what I should be doing. I should be at

1:00:59.200 --> 1:01:02.280
<v Speaker 1>worked longer, I should be a work short, your bosson

1:01:02.400 --> 1:01:06.200
<v Speaker 1>your job. Yeah, you should be look at but then

1:01:06.200 --> 1:01:08.560
<v Speaker 1>I have Then you have to balance that with I

1:01:08.560 --> 1:01:10.720
<v Speaker 1>should be spending more time with my family. I should

1:01:10.760 --> 1:01:13.880
<v Speaker 1>I should unplug, I should be working a little bit long,

1:01:13.960 --> 1:01:17.560
<v Speaker 1>like all those different things. So, um, it definitely gives

1:01:18.200 --> 1:01:20.000
<v Speaker 1>a lot of things to think about, you know, and

1:01:20.000 --> 1:01:22.920
<v Speaker 1>and and he gave us so many nuggets and his

1:01:23.080 --> 1:01:25.280
<v Speaker 1>book that I've been able to start let the world

1:01:25.320 --> 1:01:27.040
<v Speaker 1>see you how to be real in the world full

1:01:27.040 --> 1:01:30.400
<v Speaker 1>of fakes. Man. He has got a winner on his hands.

1:01:30.720 --> 1:01:35.200
<v Speaker 1>If you haven't, you should be behind his book. Appreciate

1:01:35.200 --> 1:01:38.320
<v Speaker 1>your time, Appreciate you listening to us until the next episode.

1:01:39.320 --> 1:01:42.280
<v Speaker 1>I'm Steve Smith Senior. I'm a Little John, Just cut

1:01:42.280 --> 1:01:47.360
<v Speaker 1>to It. Cut to It with Steve Smith Senior. That

1:01:47.560 --> 1:01:51.960
<v Speaker 1>Is Me is a production of Cut to It LLC,

1:01:52.360 --> 1:01:56.440
<v Speaker 1>Baltol Creative Media, The Black Effect, and I Heart Radio.

1:01:56.680 --> 1:02:00.680
<v Speaker 1>For more podcast from my Heart Radio, visit the Heart Radio,

1:02:00.760 --> 1:02:05.120
<v Speaker 1>Apple Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

1:02:05.960 --> 1:02:10.200
<v Speaker 1>From Cut to It. Executive producer Steve Smith, singer co

1:02:10.360 --> 1:02:14.640
<v Speaker 1>host Gerard Little John, talent and booking manager Joe Fusci,

1:02:15.120 --> 1:02:19.680
<v Speaker 1>social media manager Payton Smith from Balto Creative Media. Cut

1:02:19.720 --> 1:02:23.560
<v Speaker 1>to It is produced by Brian Baltaschevitch and Meredith Carter,

1:02:23.920 --> 1:02:28.160
<v Speaker 1>with production assistance by Alex Lebrec, Production manager Sarah Hollock.

1:02:28.600 --> 1:02:32.160
<v Speaker 1>Theme music by Alex Johnson, lyrics and vocals by Anthony Hamilton.

1:02:35.480 --> 1:02:37.880
<v Speaker 1>You ain't heard about it, then we're about to let

1:02:37.960 --> 1:02:42.240
<v Speaker 1>you know. It's all