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Speaker 2: Hey, hey, new Time's a seller. Hey we're back. We're black,
Speaker 2: New Times that seller, we're brown and Yan.
Speaker 1: Hey hey anything new Tiffy Bucanista, best selling author. I'm Alicia.
Speaker 2: You know I'm not gonna lie. So I when I
Speaker 2: got the call, I was like, is this real life?
Speaker 1: What happens when you become a bestseller? What is the call?
Speaker 1: That's what I want to know.
Speaker 3: So what happens is, first of all, shout out to
Speaker 3: love you for ruining the surprise this chick, I'm like,
Speaker 3: how do you know what?
Speaker 2: From my agent? So I was reading. I told my agent.
Speaker 2: I gave her a specific instructions.
Speaker 3: I said call me on this number because I wanted
Speaker 3: to take myself to get my natural reaction to see
Speaker 3: because I wasn't you know, you never know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, here goes Lovey, she what's at me? So that
Speaker 2: pops up right for you to call? So it ruined
Speaker 2: my natural reactions. It just said congratulations, did you do that? Seller?
Speaker 2: I said, started Lovey, But I was excited.
Speaker 3: But no, honestly it's because well one you know, Lovey said,
Speaker 3: you know she had said you made the list. I
Speaker 3: saw her say congratulations, so I knew that's what it was.
Speaker 3: But then hnther called me, it was like, yes, you
Speaker 3: made the list for that. The hardest list to make
Speaker 3: on the New York Times Bestsellers List is the how
Speaker 3: to list because it includes so many things that sometimes
Speaker 3: they have hardcover soft cover.
Speaker 2: It includes both hardcover and soft cover, and it includes.
Speaker 3: How to meaning how to cook, how to build a fire,
Speaker 3: like all those things go on that list, so you're
Speaker 3: really competing with so many different genres, whereas other lists
Speaker 3: don't have that issue. And it's one of the shorter lists.
Speaker 3: So I came in number four, which is like insane.
Speaker 3: And then after speaking with Heather, I'm Jackson, and my
Speaker 3: agent Marnie and my executive editor at Penguin called me.
Speaker 3: She's like, they didn't tell you made two lists. I
Speaker 3: was like, wait what. I also made number ten on
Speaker 3: the Business list. So now the Business list comes out
Speaker 3: once a month and how two list comes out once
Speaker 3: a week, so I mean both.
Speaker 2: And it's just like I.
Speaker 3: Mean, when you start to really do the math of
Speaker 3: how few books make the New York Times Bestsellers List,
Speaker 3: you just realize that, like the possibility is way more
Speaker 3: that it's not. Literally, only half a percentage ever make
Speaker 3: the list. Over one hundred thousand books come out each year,
Speaker 3: in less than five hundred get on the New York
Speaker 3: Times bestseller list, and so I don't know, it just
Speaker 3: feels very like I don't know if it ought to,
Speaker 3: but it feels very validating because you know, I came
Speaker 3: in here as a preschool teacher, and I'm sure that
Speaker 3: some people are like, well, what do you know. I'm like, well,
Speaker 3: I mean, according to the New York Times, I know, no,
Speaker 3: it just feels really good. But you know what actually
Speaker 3: feels even better? Well, I don't know if it's better,
Speaker 3: just different, like the feedback from people. Because one thing
Speaker 3: I'll tell you about black women. Let me tell you
Speaker 3: about black women, they do not suffer foolishness, meaning like
Speaker 3: if the book wasn't good, they would it would be
Speaker 3: like they would give the nice church cut, okay, baby okay,
Speaker 3: like if your baby's not cute, and they're like, oh,
Speaker 3: look at that baby looking like he looking, you know,
Speaker 3: and so to get the feedback like the overwhelming thank
Speaker 3: you so much, this is such an easy read. Somebody
Speaker 3: finally explained it to me easily. It's just and then
Speaker 3: to make the Wall Street journalists, not just the Wall
Speaker 3: Street journal I made number one on their I think
Speaker 3: it's their business list, and then number four on another
Speaker 3: Wall Street journalist the USA Today list thirty one, but
Speaker 3: it's thirty one out of all books being sold, which
Speaker 3: is crazy. Amazon's seventeen out of all books being sold.
Speaker 3: Apple four, the indie booksel so meaning like book that
Speaker 3: like ourselves sold out of, like you know, like your
Speaker 3: local bookstore made that list, like every list that is
Speaker 3: there to be made, I feel like we made it.
Speaker 3: We made over ten different lists. I just have to say,
Speaker 3: my team is what I said was and this is
Speaker 3: what Tracy, my public is in. As she said, you know,
Speaker 3: if we really look at the work that we put in,
Speaker 3: we are deserving of this. But so it's so infrequent
Speaker 3: that black women get what they're deserving of that were
Speaker 3: just so shocked because we put in ten and got
Speaker 3: out ten. Normally, you know, as a black woman, you know, man,
Speaker 3: you put in ten, you get out seven. You're like, ah,
Speaker 3: you know, that's just how it goes. You make less,
Speaker 3: you know, you know, you're not promoted as quickly. It's
Speaker 3: just becomes part of life that you put in ten,
Speaker 3: you get out seven if you're lucky. So to put
Speaker 3: in ten and get out ten, it's like you feel
Speaker 3: like you hit the lottery, and it's like it feels
Speaker 3: like a little bit of justice was done because the
Speaker 3: team put in ten. Like this is not like luck
Speaker 3: or happenstance. No, the level of work that they put
Speaker 3: in this is exactly what which should have come out
Speaker 3: but so often does not. So I'm just really overwhelmed,
Speaker 3: like with like it doesn't feel real. Like I had
Speaker 3: to literally take a walk.
Speaker 2: It was just too much.
Speaker 3: Like afterwards, I was like I told Superman, He's like,
Speaker 3: are you okay? I just need to take a walk
Speaker 3: just to decompress because it just felt like so many
Speaker 3: of my writer friends are like, girl, I've been I've
Speaker 3: been writing for twenty years, and you know it's my
Speaker 3: dream to make the list and for my first like
Speaker 3: traditionally published book, not to.
Speaker 2: Just make the list, but to just do so like
Speaker 2: with a splash is just girl, I'm.
Speaker 1: So oh my god, I feel like, well, let me
Speaker 1: tell you how I feel about it. I love tell
Speaker 1: me that's you know, you know, I feel like I've
Speaker 1: had a like a I don't know, a backseat. I've
Speaker 1: been in the car behind the car that the budget
Speaker 1: needs to like train has been pulling for so much
Speaker 1: for so long, and for me it just feels like
Speaker 1: of course, I mean, it just feels I've seen the work.
Speaker 1: It's not a surprise to me at all. And it's
Speaker 1: certainly it doesn't feel to me like it was always
Speaker 1: going to happen, or it it it was a foregone
Speaker 1: conclusion that was going to happen, Like you put in
Speaker 1: the work, and I know your team did too. I mean,
Speaker 1: y'all were talking about promoting this book. You built a
Speaker 1: whole damn website for the book. You know, you don't
Speaker 1: do anything halfway. You never have and everything that you
Speaker 1: and I'm so glad that you waited to do a
Speaker 1: traditionally published book until this moment because you focused first
Speaker 1: on giving people value and building your audience and building
Speaker 1: trust with them, and you did that. It's like you
Speaker 1: focus on what mattered first, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: like building the trust, creating value, educating people. Truly, you
Speaker 1: know what you got into this whole what can we
Speaker 1: call it a business or this whole field to do
Speaker 1: and when you were ready, you know, you put out
Speaker 1: this book and you were ready for the moment. But
Speaker 1: you you've definitely reap what you sewed all all these years.
Speaker 1: You know, you planted all those little baby acorn seeds
Speaker 1: and now it's like a tree or whatever. And on
Speaker 1: that tree is not just this is like the first
Speaker 1: you know, it's just a seedling. I feel like, you know,
Speaker 1: the tree just going to keep on growing from the
Speaker 1: past decade of work that you put in and the
Speaker 1: work of your team as well. And I hope y'all
Speaker 1: are celebrating. I don't know what the party plans are, but.
Speaker 3: Girl, I've been like, uh, okay, who wants a week
Speaker 3: can the week off? So one of the things I
Speaker 3: learned is from now like one of our kind of
Speaker 3: like SOP standard operating procedures for those of y'all not
Speaker 3: in business then that we're going to integrate is that
Speaker 3: after a big launch, part of the launch is the
Speaker 3: week or two or two weeks after that we take
Speaker 3: off because it's so much you know what I mean,
Speaker 3: and like we're still doing things. So even though it's
Speaker 3: not as crazy, we haven't gotten a time to decompress.
Speaker 2: A word I've learned from that, like, we're not doing
Speaker 2: this next time.
Speaker 3: The next time it's gonna be like, yay week off,
Speaker 3: two weeks off, just to give people a chance to
Speaker 3: like recoup and regroup.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know.
Speaker 3: The team has been like literally when the numbers were
Speaker 3: coming out, and can I guess I'll give you guys,
Speaker 3: because what it takes to be on the best seller's list,
Speaker 3: so this is I mean New York Times doesn't give
Speaker 3: you much, and so this is what people have hypothesized,
Speaker 3: and it's fairly true. But then at the end of
Speaker 3: the day, they just decide. So typically you're looking at
Speaker 3: around ten thousand books. You know, if you sell around
Speaker 3: ten thousand books, you know you're on their radar. But
Speaker 3: people have made the list selling four thousand books, you know,
Speaker 3: if it's like something they really enjoy, you know, but
Speaker 3: you just know that at ten thousand you're fairly safe
Speaker 3: to at least be considered.
Speaker 2: So that's one.
Speaker 3: Although they're like, there's a smoothie Lady JJ Smith. I
Speaker 3: think she's got a smoothie book. She sold over a million,
Speaker 3: so I can only imagine what she sold, but she
Speaker 3: never she did hurt. That book did not make the list,
Speaker 3: so it's not just book sales, but it's just to
Speaker 3: be just to be looked at. Ten thousand books within
Speaker 3: the first week, and so within the first week includes
Speaker 3: pre orders. So any book bought, you know, before your
Speaker 3: book launch and during the first week of book sales
Speaker 3: will be considered week one sales. That's why it is,
Speaker 3: I don't want to say easier, but it is you
Speaker 3: have a better chance of making it the first week
Speaker 3: because you can accumulate, you know, like some people will
Speaker 3: start doing pre sales a year before. I started doing
Speaker 3: pre sales two months before, so that's one. And so
Speaker 3: we sold like well over twenty thousand books between twenty
Speaker 3: to twenty five thousands. Some numbers are because we also
Speaker 3: did book order, so depending on when the order went through,
Speaker 3: it could be up to twenty six thousand book a
Speaker 3: good amount of books. And I didn't know if that
Speaker 3: was a lot or little. I'd asked my Heather, you
Speaker 3: know what is good, what is great? What is unicorn?
Speaker 3: And if you know me, unicorn means excellent. And so
Speaker 3: she had told me that good was five, great was
Speaker 3: ten thousand, and unicorn was twenty thousand. I said, okay,
Speaker 3: bet so my mind Mandy I said, were going for Unicorn.
Speaker 3: So then I was talking to Brian, who is our
Speaker 3: assistant marketing director from Penguin. So we had weekly meetings
Speaker 3: for the for the gig Gos Money crew, like we
Speaker 3: would meet every Monday at one thirty, and so I
Speaker 3: told Brian.
Speaker 2: I was like, oo oho, we did it. We did it.
Speaker 2: We made Unicorn. And she's like, what do you mean?
Speaker 2: I said, well, I asked Heather, when we first started,
Speaker 2: what's good five thousand, what's Grete ten, what's Unicorn twenty thousand?
Speaker 2: We did it.
Speaker 3: She was like, girl, Heather tricked you. I was like, wait,
Speaker 3: what do you mean. She's like, girl, Unicorn is ten thousand.
Speaker 3: I was like, wait what she said, yes, girl, She's like,
Speaker 3: people don't sell ten thousand first week. I said, I
Speaker 3: called Heather right away. Heather started laughing. She said, but
Speaker 3: you did it right. She's like, I picked up your
Speaker 3: personality fairly quickly, tippy. She was like, she said, I
Speaker 3: realized if I pushed you that she would do it,
Speaker 3: and so I'm grateful for that. So that was one
Speaker 3: sell your ten thousand two Amazon not Amazon. New York
Speaker 3: Times likes to see that you have sold books from
Speaker 3: multiple retailers because they want to. They don't if you
Speaker 3: sold one hundred thousand books but just on Amazon. They're like, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 3: They like to see that, you know, like you have
Speaker 3: some Amazon, some Barns and Noble, some Target, so like
Speaker 3: a mix. So we made it our big business to
Speaker 3: like market to say, like we had this one marketing
Speaker 3: like drop a We're like, use.
Speaker 2: Your old you know, do you still have that old
Speaker 2: Target card?
Speaker 1: Girl?
Speaker 2: Use it to get go with money.
Speaker 3: You ain't gonna use it anyway, So we sold out
Speaker 3: a Target after after dropping those social media posts, Target
Speaker 3: had to re up.
Speaker 2: So that's one.
Speaker 3: That's two three. They also like to see that you
Speaker 3: have some indie book sales, meaning like so one of
Speaker 3: the things I did was I really partnered with some
Speaker 3: black owned book bookstores and also some small bookstores where
Speaker 3: I signed copies there and I gave them Budgetista bracelets
Speaker 3: to encourage people to support smaller book bookstores. And so
Speaker 3: they like to see that. So I was like, Okay,
Speaker 3: let me make sure that we encourage dream catchers that like, yes,
Speaker 3: although the smaller bookstore they might not be able to
Speaker 3: give you the huge discount the Amazon gives you, but
Speaker 3: the books there are signed, and I gave them my
Speaker 3: budget needs to bracelets, so you'll get that bracelet there
Speaker 3: and there.
Speaker 2: Cool, and that was like a fun way.
Speaker 3: Plus it was just really great to be able to support,
Speaker 3: you know, these more indie, smaller bookstores, cause that's how
Speaker 3: they survive. A Fourth thing that they look at is
Speaker 3: they like to see that there is like national media attention,
Speaker 3: you know.
Speaker 2: So I was fortunate, you.
Speaker 3: Know, exactly exactly start to good morn in America twice
Speaker 3: when the book job, and then today so the next
Speaker 3: day and then just today I tape the real that's
Speaker 3: about the book as well, so they like.
Speaker 2: To see that.
Speaker 3: And then fifth, they like, this is kind of new,
Speaker 3: like some social media buzz. So what they're looking for,
Speaker 3: what it seems like is there's some cultural relevance, like
Speaker 3: do people actually care, you know, like is this a
Speaker 3: book that people are wanting and needing? And so that's
Speaker 3: that was just like so that's what that's what people
Speaker 3: kind of know. But other than that, you know, and
Speaker 3: that might even not be fully true. But this is
Speaker 3: like kind of like if you were to do your Googles,
Speaker 3: ask your publisher, they would.
Speaker 2: Say, like if you do those things.
Speaker 3: That's all you can do, you know, Like that's you
Speaker 3: could just we just did all of those things and
Speaker 3: just said at the end of the day, though they
Speaker 3: can just say not you but her, or not not
Speaker 3: her but you, And just because someone is above me
Speaker 3: on the list doesn't mean they sold more than me.
Speaker 3: Like you can literally look up what people sold through
Speaker 3: this thing called book scan, like I can't. I mean,
Speaker 3: if you want to pay for a book scan, you can,
Speaker 3: but then you might see that like, oh, I actually
Speaker 3: sold more than the person who's number one, you know
Speaker 3: what I mean.
Speaker 2: Like, so there's no rhyme or reason.
Speaker 1: So that's why I think they should like not call
Speaker 1: it the best sellers list. I don't know, it seems
Speaker 1: a little yes, I don't think advertising, so.
Speaker 2: It feels strange.
Speaker 3: So I will say this that, like from what I understand,
Speaker 3: the USA Today, I don't know how Wall Street Journal
Speaker 3: calculates BO USA Today is truly like, girl, how many
Speaker 3: did you sell?
Speaker 2: Like that? That list? For sure? So the New York
Speaker 2: Times bestsellers lists.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's that's why people are like it is there's
Speaker 3: no they don't they don't give you the algorithm. But
Speaker 3: this is what kind of what people have deduce. That's
Speaker 3: why I was like, people are, you're definitely gonna make it.
Speaker 3: I'm like, it doesn't work like that. I could have
Speaker 3: sold one hundred thousand books and maybe not made it,
Speaker 3: you know, So that's why it just makes it like
Speaker 3: because it's just a nod. The reason why for me
Speaker 3: the New York Times Bestsellers List important is because I
Speaker 3: don't have to explain what that means in this space
Speaker 3: where I'm already devalued because one I'm a woman and
Speaker 3: two I'm a black woman.
Speaker 2: It's like, okay, it gives me that stamp.
Speaker 3: I remember what happened with that you know that conference
Speaker 3: that we don't know, we no longer name yep, and
Speaker 3: how you know the founder of that conference, Voldemort said,
Speaker 3: you know, like I wasn't worth more than twenty five
Speaker 3: hundred dollars and how that whole like anybody who wasn't
Speaker 3: brown or other in that community where it's like who she?
Speaker 2: She doesn't deserve? How dear she ask? Like that was
Speaker 2: the sentiment.
Speaker 3: And now I'm like, so with this, it's like, don't
Speaker 3: don't fix your lips to say that like even though
Speaker 3: I wasn't deserving of that then especially now this translate
Speaker 3: now you know who I am?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know.
Speaker 3: And so it's just a shame that you have to
Speaker 3: like have these like stamps of approval to be taken seriously.
Speaker 3: And it's quite honestly one of the reasons why I
Speaker 3: just speak directly to like, you know, our RBA's you know,
Speaker 3: because it's hard out there, no streets.
Speaker 2: But yeah, so it's just like like I said, it
Speaker 2: feels good.
Speaker 3: And although I am tired of people saying what's next,
Speaker 3: I'm like, Sis, rest is next.
Speaker 2: I'm taking six weeks off, leave me alone.
Speaker 1: What I want to know? Where's the party?
Speaker 2: How?
Speaker 1: Well? Yeah, what what does your rest look like? We
Speaker 1: talked with like last week with Earn Your Leisure guys, which,
Speaker 1: by the way, epic show. Go listen, ey l. First
Speaker 1: of all, all my guy friends and Enrique's my husband's
Speaker 1: family and friends, like I have so much clout now
Speaker 1: they actually pay attention. They're like, so you had Earn
Speaker 1: your Leisure. Okay, so your podcast is like a thing,
Speaker 1: but yeah we got we got yes, anyway, go check
Speaker 1: it out. But on that show, we talked about what's
Speaker 1: leisure and so what does rest look like for you?
Speaker 1: What's restaurative you rest restorative to you? And how are
Speaker 1: you going to recharge? Because you have given so so
Speaker 1: much in a year, believe, in a year like this,
Speaker 1: you get like, wait, we didn't even put in that context.
Speaker 1: You had a bestseller in a pandemonium.
Speaker 2: Like TIV you knew that.
Speaker 1: I know you did that in a year when no
Speaker 1: one would have blamed you for putting your head under
Speaker 1: the pillow and just saying I cannot you Wow, I'm
Speaker 1: getting tearyoyte. Anyway, I'll answer my question.
Speaker 3: Honestly, I would really love to go out so one
Speaker 3: I'm actually going to pick back up with IVF because
Speaker 3: I put it to the side. I was like I
Speaker 3: cannot do this and I have to say it's just
Speaker 3: not possible. I didn't want, you know, I didn't want
Speaker 3: to be like all hormonal and like I was already
Speaker 3: like you know, there's already a level of stress with
Speaker 3: like doing like the launch and stuff.
Speaker 2: So I'll pick it back up with IVF.
Speaker 3: I would really like it depends on like where I
Speaker 3: am with my cycle that I want to go away somewhere.
Speaker 3: So it's either I'm going to go away somewhere driveable
Speaker 3: or depending on where I am with my cycle. If
Speaker 3: I'm able to like go fly somewhere, then I will.
Speaker 3: I would love to do like I want to do
Speaker 3: a solo trip. I haven't decided where, but then I
Speaker 3: also want to do like a trip with hupstar with Superman,
Speaker 3: and then even like a like a weekend thing, like
Speaker 3: if it's like a like for example, my friend Rihanna
Speaker 3: and I we went to Rhode Island. Remember that time
Speaker 3: we went to Rhode Island into all the beautiful mansions,
Speaker 3: like even something like that, like a girl something like that.
Speaker 3: So I want to do like three different things, one
Speaker 3: for myself, one for me and hubby, and like something
Speaker 3: even like a weekend thing for me and my girls.
Speaker 3: So just to that's like in part because I needed
Speaker 3: to like see other places.
Speaker 2: I need to get out.
Speaker 3: I would love to see some blue water if I'm
Speaker 3: able and I'm allowed based upon where I am in
Speaker 3: my cycle, and if not, even if not, I'm still
Speaker 3: going to like go somewhere and like I don't care
Speaker 3: if it's an Airbnb and I'm like and it's like
Speaker 3: twenty minutes away, I'm like, everybody leave me alone.
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna eat food. And land his bed.
Speaker 1: I need like one of those silent retreats.
Speaker 2: Yes, oh, just like a wusaw. And also too, I
Speaker 2: want to reset like I feel like we did it.
Speaker 3: Joe like, Okay, Tiffany, you have been working really hard
Speaker 3: for ten years. And I mean, I will say this
Speaker 3: that I used to travel a lot. It was really
Speaker 3: the last two and a half three years because of IVF,
Speaker 3: I just have not been able to.
Speaker 2: But I want.
Speaker 3: I was just talking to my sah oh Karen about
Speaker 3: I'm like, girl, I don't want to do more than
Speaker 3: two meetings a week, one big meeting for the Literature Academy,
Speaker 3: one big meeting for the Budgetista.
Speaker 2: That's it.
Speaker 3: The rest y'all got. She's like, we got it. So
Speaker 3: I'm really paring down of what I look like hands
Speaker 3: on because honestly is my team has proven to be amazing.
Speaker 3: So and I told Tracy of tra CYLJPR on Insta.
Speaker 3: I was like, sis, honestly because she was like today,
Speaker 3: She's like, so what about? I was like nope that
Speaker 3: I told her. I'm gonna give her like three spots
Speaker 3: maybe a week to be like, figure out which press
Speaker 3: you think is most important, but don't pitch me for anything,
Speaker 3: only things that come in you decide, but slate it
Speaker 3: for only three spots because I want to I want
Speaker 3: to navigate differently, like I already take before the launch.
Speaker 3: I was already taking Wednesdays and Fridays off. Well, Wednesdays
Speaker 3: I was taking off of meetings and phone calls, and
Speaker 3: then Fridays I was just taking off. So I'm gonna
Speaker 3: we're going back to that by the end of this month.
Speaker 3: I'll be back to my Wednesdays with no meetings, no
Speaker 3: phone calls, and Friday's off off because I really don't
Speaker 3: work on the weekends unless it was like this launch.
Speaker 2: So yeah, I want to go back to I don't know.
Speaker 3: Like like I was talking to doctor Green and my
Speaker 3: my coach, last therapist. She said, don't come me a therapist.
Speaker 3: She's not a therapist, but she is a therapist. She
Speaker 3: was like, I want you to reset for the woman
Speaker 3: that you are now because you still operate mentally.
Speaker 2: And it's true.
Speaker 3: I still think of myself like, you know, I used
Speaker 3: to be a preschool teacher. It's like, yeah, girl, that
Speaker 3: was like ten years ago. You're Tiffany the budget Nesta
Speaker 3: now business owner, wife, stepmother, daughter, aren't like, I want
Speaker 3: you to be this Tiffany now and stand in that moment.
Speaker 2: So I want to reset, to get to who.
Speaker 3: I am now, but I want to I want to
Speaker 3: do less but be more, you know, hmm.
Speaker 2: So I'm looking forward to that.
Speaker 1: That sounds wonderful. Well, you deserve it, and I'm so
Speaker 1: so happy for you, and you did it. I mean,
Speaker 1: I feel like you did it for all of us
Speaker 1: in a way. And I also I got that I
Speaker 1: had that phrase in my head from that the IG
Speaker 1: account unique Jones is that who owns it?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: Because of them? We can't can't because of you, Tiffany.
Speaker 1: I just feel like there is so much you gave publishers,
Speaker 1: I mean and truly because in twenty twenty one, even now,
Speaker 1: it is very very hard as a woman of color
Speaker 1: to be taken seriously in the traditional publishing industry. And
Speaker 1: it's almost like your success because of you, so many
Speaker 1: other women may get an opportunity that they may not
Speaker 1: have gotten before. And it feels like, in twenty twenty one,
Speaker 1: how can there still be trailblazers? You know, we should
Speaker 1: have all this figured out, but it's there. You are
Speaker 1: a trailblazer and so on behalf of just any woman
Speaker 1: who ever wants to be a published author and have
Speaker 1: someone take a chance on her. Thank you and you
Speaker 1: did it. I'm so yeah.
Speaker 2: I always feel like we did it.
Speaker 3: One of the things I'm like most proud of off
Speaker 3: is that I can tell Penguin, like those women on
Speaker 3: the Penguin team like they're going to see black women differently,
Speaker 3: because you know, my whole team is like sisters and
Speaker 3: just like and when they would join the call and
Speaker 3: like literally they were like, you guys are well oiled.
Speaker 3: And she because it was like ten of us and
Speaker 3: they said normally when they see someone with a big team,
Speaker 3: they rolled her. I was like, oh boy, it's about
Speaker 3: to be roadblock city. But she was like we literally
Speaker 3: used to talk around the office about what a joy
Speaker 3: it was to work with you guys, that we're just
Speaker 3: here to support you. You tell us what you're doing,
Speaker 3: and we're like, okay, sure, here you go. And so
Speaker 3: I love that, you know, because I think it's important,
Speaker 3: like to break down those stereotypes. I'm like, you know,
Speaker 3: so if there's that system in the office that you
Speaker 3: think has an attitude, she doesn't have an attitude.
Speaker 2: She's doing her work. She's a bad ass.
Speaker 3: Give her a chance, you know, And so I just
Speaker 3: thought that that was really dope too, that they got
Speaker 3: to see, like, look look at the power of these
Speaker 3: amazing black and brown women and what they've been able
Speaker 3: to do. I mean, honestly, Pengin was like, you know,
Speaker 3: we could do a case study. I'm like, Sis, we're tired, tired, Yeah,
Speaker 3: go study your own case.
Speaker 2: We're tired. But yeah, so no, but thank you squad.
Speaker 2: I no, why are you the youth squad?
Speaker 3: They're like, Okay, I'm like, I'm like, I promise you guys,
Speaker 3: We're gonna rotated.
Speaker 2: I'm like, who needs a week, who's first, who's most
Speaker 2: burnt out?
Speaker 3: But yeah, honestly, I don't even like that, like that's
Speaker 3: something like as a leader that I was like, okay,
Speaker 3: that is a that's something that I'm going to do better,
Speaker 3: you know, because I was just like I don't like
Speaker 3: the fact that afterwards, I just felt like we were
Speaker 3: also drained. I'm like, I'm going to do a better
Speaker 3: job of like what does it look like we're doing
Speaker 3: a sop for this to learn? What things do we
Speaker 3: not have to do? That actually didn't move the needle
Speaker 3: and what things did really move the needle? So that
Speaker 3: way next time we can work less but work more meaningfully.
Speaker 1: You know, of course, well you had never done it before,
Speaker 1: so that as long as in the time to reflect
Speaker 1: and to pick apart, when you guys are in a
Speaker 1: better place, when you can look back on it with
Speaker 1: clear heads and clear minds and clear eyes and all that,
Speaker 1: that's the exciting part I feel like, is how did
Speaker 1: this thing happen? But yeah, congratulations, I guess that's that's
Speaker 1: our whole buzzworthy. Who cares? What else is going on? Congrattive?
Speaker 1: Get good with money dot com? That's what's next. Go
Speaker 1: buy a book, buy a book for a brand. All right,
Speaker 1: when you take a quick break and be back with
Speaker 1: you questions. Okba fan, we are back in answering your questions. Reminder,
Speaker 1: you can now leave us a voicemail or text your question.
Speaker 1: Just hit us up at eight four four eight five
Speaker 1: eight eight zero eight zero eight for four eight five
Speaker 1: eight eight zero eight zero. Try to keep it brief though.
Speaker 1: I know lots of you guys have been trying to
Speaker 1: send us questions and getting caught off by our voicemail,
Speaker 1: So try to keep it under at least a minute,
Speaker 1: and if you get cut off or you have a
Speaker 1: more in depth question, you can still reach us the
Speaker 1: old fashioned ways on Insta, hit us up via DM
Speaker 1: or by email. Brand Ambition podcast at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: All right, let's get into it. So we have a
Speaker 1: couple of very good questions from IG today. This one
Speaker 1: comes from listener Alia. Alia says, I'm a new listener
Speaker 1: to the podcast, and I'm learning a lot. I got
Speaker 1: myself into about ten thousand dollars of credit card debt
Speaker 1: after moving to a new state and getting married. I
Speaker 1: make forty eight thousand dollars a year, and due to
Speaker 1: accidentally contributing a lot to my four oh one K
Speaker 1: for the first three years in the business, I actually
Speaker 1: have about seventeen thousand dollars in my four to one
Speaker 1: K retirement account. Here's the thing, Digging myself out of
Speaker 1: this debt is like shooting a water gun at a
Speaker 1: forest fire. I'm budgeting the best I can, but I'm
Speaker 1: pretty much supporting myself and my husband while he's in
Speaker 1: medical school. I really want to withdraw ten thousand dollars
Speaker 1: from my four to one K to wipe out the
Speaker 1: debt and start fresh next year when my husband graduates,
Speaker 1: will have two incomes and want to start our family.
Speaker 1: And in three to four years he'll be making about
Speaker 1: six figures on his own. So I trust I'll be
Speaker 1: financially set in a few years. And I really want
Speaker 1: to get rid of this debt. Now, what do you
Speaker 1: guys think? So ten thousand dollars is weighing on her,
Speaker 1: which you know, credit card debt. Ten thousand dollars today
Speaker 1: can be a lot more dollars a year from now,
Speaker 1: even with the high interest rates. So but I love
Speaker 1: how she said, though accidentally identally contributed a lot to
Speaker 1: my former day.
Speaker 3: She's like, you know, just so we can sway your
Speaker 3: thinks because my knees. Your reaction is like says, leave
Speaker 3: it alone. But I can understand because here's my concern too,
Speaker 3: because yes, although your husband when he graduates, will be
Speaker 3: making more money, you will also have more debts, a
Speaker 3: lot more debt. Because my assumption is, you know, he
Speaker 3: got loans to go to medical school, and if he didn't,
Speaker 3: that's awesome.
Speaker 1: Yep.
Speaker 3: Because here's the thing, it's not just the ten thousand.
Speaker 3: Because people like to look at the money they put
Speaker 3: up for retirement as like this flat money.
Speaker 2: It's not. It's the compounding interest.
Speaker 3: So you have to think that your ten thousand that
Speaker 3: you have in there earned interest, and then the next
Speaker 3: year the interest and the ten thousand earns interest, and
Speaker 3: the next year the interest and the interest and the
Speaker 3: ten interest, and the next year and the interest, and
Speaker 3: so you miss out Once you take that money out,
Speaker 3: you miss out on that interest, on the interest, on
Speaker 3: the interest. Even if you put it back, you can
Speaker 3: never get back the money you would have earned on
Speaker 3: past interest. It's gone forever and ever and ever. That's
Speaker 3: why people tell you leave your your retirement money alone.
Speaker 3: And here's the thing too. I hate to make plans.
Speaker 3: I guess me, and you know you know how we are,
Speaker 3: me and Mandy right that we are like worry words.
Speaker 3: I don't want to make plans on well, in the future,
Speaker 3: it'll be great, uh pandemic corona corona coro, as Nigerians
Speaker 3: will say, like so many people had plans about, oh
Speaker 3: this is what I'm gonna do and then and took everything.
Speaker 3: So I don't want you to make plans on for sure,
Speaker 3: for sure, my husband is going to although it's highly
Speaker 3: highly likely but as unlikely as as I was gonna say,
Speaker 3: panteing as as unlikely as quarantine was. Here we are, so, ugh,
Speaker 3: I is there.
Speaker 2: A way maybe?
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't know what her credit score looks like,
Speaker 3: maybe rolling it over to a what are those things?
Speaker 3: A balanced transfer card? Yeah, you know, we're let's talk
Speaker 3: about alternatives. Yeah, yes, alternatives. So this is a very
Speaker 3: common thing. You know, I have some debt, but I
Speaker 3: have this nest egg.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: Oh oops, I have seventeen thousand dollars. I can just
Speaker 1: pull out of that. But let's actually talk about like
Speaker 1: the list of options. So one, yes, your four one
Speaker 1: K is an option, good or bad. That's left to
Speaker 1: others to decide, but it's an option. And then yeah,
Speaker 1: balance transfer card, so talk about that, Tiffany, So a.
Speaker 2: Balance transfer card.
Speaker 3: This is what I did, honestly when I lost everything.
Speaker 3: So if you don't know, since you're a new listener,
Speaker 3: like in two thousand and eight nine ten, big great
Speaker 3: recession came, I lost everything. It was like three hundred
Speaker 3: thousand dollars in debt. Thirty five thousand of that was
Speaker 3: credit card debt. Although I was living off unemployment and
Speaker 3: on my sister's couch. So one of the ways I
Speaker 3: was able to tackle that thirty five thousand dollars in
Speaker 3: debt was I because my credit card was decent. I
Speaker 3: opened up a balanced transfer card, a couple of them, honestly,
Speaker 3: where I took the balance on one card, the card
Speaker 3: that had interest, and rolled it over to a balanced
Speaker 3: transfer card. Because my credit card was decent, I was
Speaker 3: able to get a balance treansfer card. It was like
Speaker 3: eighteen months interest free, so I had eighteen months to
Speaker 3: pay down this card with like so all my money
Speaker 3: would go directly to the principle, directly to the ten thousand,
Speaker 3: not ten thousand plus interests. So that helped me pay
Speaker 3: down that thirty five thousand. It took me like two
Speaker 3: and a half three years in order to do so.
Speaker 3: Now it was a strugg but you know it did.
Speaker 3: And now here's the thing. The reason why you know,
Speaker 3: what's her name again?
Speaker 1: Alia?
Speaker 2: Alia? Pretty name. So the reason why I'm like eugh
Speaker 2: girl is because I'm not here to judge you. Consists.
Speaker 3: I took all the money out of my retirement account
Speaker 3: to try to pay off bills and I didn't get back.
Speaker 3: So I was thirty twenty nine thirty when I did that.
Speaker 3: I didn't get back to putting a side for retirement
Speaker 3: until like four years ago. That sometimes life throws you
Speaker 3: off track and you might think I'll definitely get back,
Speaker 3: and so I'm like behind the eight ball. So now
Speaker 3: I'm trying to catch up. So I'm not saying I
Speaker 3: from a place to judgement. I'm saying from a place
Speaker 3: so I'm here now. I'm forty one years old. I've
Speaker 3: only been saving for retirement for like four years because
Speaker 3: of a choice that I made over ten years ago.
Speaker 3: So I just it just makes me a little bit nervous.
Speaker 3: But there's you know, you have to do what's best
Speaker 3: for you. But I would consider alternatives before touching my
Speaker 3: retirement money.
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, So a balance transfer credit card is definitely
Speaker 1: a good option if you have good credit, so like
Speaker 1: six eighty and above, and you can honestly google to
Speaker 1: see if there's any good balance transfer options available to you. Also,
Speaker 1: you know, applying for a small loan like a personal
Speaker 1: loan through a credit union or an online bank at
Speaker 1: a fixed interest rate. So that gets at the really
Speaker 1: the terrible thing about credit card debt is it has
Speaker 1: not only really high interest rates, but it also has
Speaker 1: revolving interest rates or variable interest rates rather, which means
Speaker 1: that they can change whenever they want to change the rates,
Speaker 1: they can go up, and they usually do go up.
Speaker 1: It's never really in your favor. So with a personal loan,
Speaker 1: you know you could take it a loan, you know
Speaker 1: exactly what your rate's going to be, and it's fixed,
Speaker 1: it's not going to go up, and you know you
Speaker 1: get your You can choose how long you have to
Speaker 1: pay off the loan. It can be a couple of years,
Speaker 1: a few years, and you know what exactly you're getting. Yes,
Speaker 1: you're paying interest, but at least it is a known
Speaker 1: entity in a quantity. To your point about to what
Speaker 1: she says about shooting a water gun at a forest fire,
Speaker 1: I mean, ten thousand dollars is a lot, okay, and
Speaker 1: it's credit card debt, so it is, Yes, that is
Speaker 1: a lot of credit card debt, but is it a
Speaker 1: forest fire?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 1: I don't know if I would be. It doesn't. It's doable.
Speaker 1: You seem very financially conscious. I mean, you married a
Speaker 1: boo who's going to be a doctor, so that was great,
Speaker 1: and you seem like you've got a great career going on.
Speaker 1: So I feel like you can tackle this, you really
Speaker 1: can without necessarily needing to dip into your four to
Speaker 1: one K. And we should also talk about, you know
Speaker 1: what Tiffany said about missing out on the compounding interest.
Speaker 1: You also may face tax penalties when you withdraw from
Speaker 1: your four to one K if you're under a certain
Speaker 1: age limit. I think it's like fifty nine and a half,
Speaker 1: So there could be an additional loss there, not just
Speaker 1: from you know, stock market gains that you're missing out
Speaker 1: on by taking that ten k out, but also just
Speaker 1: tax penalties for early withdrawals. And it differs a little
Speaker 1: bit depending on how you take the money out. So
Speaker 1: we can post a link to an article about the
Speaker 1: difference between a four h one k loan, which is
Speaker 1: when you borrow from yourself and then you pay yourself back.
Speaker 1: I've actually done that before and I'm a fan. The
Speaker 1: risk there is if you were to leave your job,
Speaker 1: you would immediately owe that money back. So there's risks
Speaker 1: and there's pros to to all these different things. But
Speaker 1: ten ten k, I feel like that's a small enough
Speaker 1: amount to wear a couple of balance trendsfer credit cards
Speaker 1: or personal loan. You know, you can tackle that, and
Speaker 1: you can still be letting that seventeen K little nest
Speaker 1: egg that you've grown accidentally, which is great. You know,
Speaker 1: I wish be more people accidentally say for retirement, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you've just let that continue to grow. And honestly, trying
Speaker 1: to predict the future in terms of where you think
Speaker 1: you're going to be financially, I don't know, man. I
Speaker 1: just say I think your sense of urgency to get
Speaker 1: rid of it now while you have where, while you're
Speaker 1: able to work and you've got an income, and you've
Speaker 1: got options, I would say, you know, do it now,
Speaker 1: but maybe not with the same like with me, but
Speaker 1: maybe not going to that like nuclear option of taking
Speaker 1: money out of your form on and K first. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and tips right that your husband's going to ask some
Speaker 1: student loan, so y, yeah, he'll have enough going on
Speaker 1: even if he does earn six figures. All right, Well,
Speaker 1: I'm going to post a link definitely in the show
Speaker 1: notes about the difference between four to one K loan
Speaker 1: and withdrawal, because I think they get very often confused.
Speaker 1: And some of the other options, you know, other than
Speaker 1: going into your four one K, like we talked about
Speaker 1: balance transfer cards, personal loans, you have other ways to
Speaker 1: pay on the debt. But thanks for your question.
Speaker 2: Yeah, question, all right.
Speaker 1: Second question, This one's going to be near and dear
Speaker 1: to Tiffany's heart, probably as it comes from a teacher.
Speaker 1: All right, So this listener wants to remain anonymous because
Speaker 1: she works at a school, so let's call her Jane.
Speaker 1: Jane says, help, I work at a growing charter school
Speaker 1: as a leader. I'm afraid of backlash if I leave
Speaker 1: the charter school because it is no longer conducive for
Speaker 1: my life as a parent. However, the culture is sometimes
Speaker 1: unfortunately like they will try to negotiate to keep you.
Speaker 1: I'm struggling with the stress. I have great potential to
Speaker 1: grow my career, but is it worth all that? Do
Speaker 1: I have to feel the need to climb the ladder
Speaker 1: when I know it's going to impact my ability to
Speaker 1: be mentally and physically present for my growing family? Should
Speaker 1: I stay or leave? I have a job offer making
Speaker 1: the same salary for another school. What do y'all think, Jane?
Speaker 3: Run No so as somebody who you know was a teacher,
Speaker 3: but I am also very familiar with the charter school.
Speaker 2: H How do you so hustle?
Speaker 3: It's really intense Mandy, like, think about school, but then
Speaker 3: add corporate America. Like all of my friends who work
Speaker 3: for charter schools, it's a lot like I've had a
Speaker 3: number of friends who leave. You know, it's you know,
Speaker 3: if you're a brand new teacher and you've never worked
Speaker 3: in a teaching environment before, and you don't know that
Speaker 3: there's like other ways than it could be all right.
Speaker 3: But I remember, even when I was just gonna, I
Speaker 3: was gonna do an after school program at a charter's, Mandy.
Speaker 2: I was like, is this jail? They were so strict
Speaker 2: the way they talk to the kid.
Speaker 3: I mean, not all try to schools, obviously, because I've
Speaker 3: definitely seen some amazing ones, But so I can imagine
Speaker 3: the environment that she's talking about. It's very it feels
Speaker 3: very corporate what I imagine, I guess corporate America, meaning
Speaker 3: like but not in the good way.
Speaker 2: You know, like, these are your expectations. We need to
Speaker 2: stay late.
Speaker 3: We need you to sell Jane sis Sis as someone
Speaker 3: who is team doing too much. Don't come up to
Speaker 3: this side. It's not cute over here. I'm trying to
Speaker 3: go over to you know, doing less. So I would
Speaker 3: suggest to you, especially it's not like you're saying, should
Speaker 3: I quit? And I don't know how I'm going to
Speaker 3: feed my family? You literally are going to replace your
Speaker 3: income with comparable income and a better emotional and mental
Speaker 3: space for yourself. No, always choose yourself and your family first,
Speaker 3: and you know you have something that you're going to
Speaker 3: be able to still maintain what you bring into the household.
Speaker 3: Don't like running up a corporate or whatever ladder at school.
Speaker 3: I get all that, but is that where you even
Speaker 3: want to go?
Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
Speaker 3: Like, it doesn't make sense to be the best at
Speaker 3: the worst thing like that. There's nothing worse than being
Speaker 3: successful at the thing you hate. You're like, oh, great,
Speaker 3: have more, this is great? Yeah, yeah, so that's.
Speaker 1: She doesn't hate the sorry interrupt God, doesn't sound like
Speaker 1: she hates necessarily what she's doing, but where she's doing
Speaker 1: it exactly? And get I get the question here. It
Speaker 1: seems like they'll try to negotiate to keep you. So
Speaker 1: when she goes to them with this, you know the
Speaker 1: fact that she has a job offer at another school,
Speaker 1: they may just try and throw money at her to
Speaker 1: keep her around. It just depends on what you value more,
Speaker 1: do you and and think about how much more they're
Speaker 1: going to be giving you, and just spread that out,
Speaker 1: spread that out over however many paychecks a year that
Speaker 1: you get. Sometimes on paper a raise can sound a
Speaker 1: little bit better than it is, you know, after taxes
Speaker 1: and after you spread it out over the year, just
Speaker 1: really think about it, and and you just check in
Speaker 1: with what you value, you know. I think that's when
Speaker 1: people get clear about what they value. Do you value
Speaker 1: your mental health and your ability to be present for
Speaker 1: your family over dollar signs and what people think about you.
Speaker 1: I kind of get the sense that you know the
Speaker 1: answer to your question just based on what you're asking us.
Speaker 1: And as a mom, I would say anything that threatens
Speaker 1: your mental health threatens your child's mental health as well,
Speaker 1: because they're not getting the mom or the parent that
Speaker 1: they deserve, Like you can't be one hundred percent emotionally
Speaker 1: and mentally present for them. And I'm not about that life.
Speaker 1: Everything I do that makes myself better, I'm doing it
Speaker 1: so I can be a better person to be around
Speaker 1: for my child and for my family. And that just
Speaker 1: when I got clear about that being a value, it
Speaker 1: made all my career and financial and any choice really
Speaker 1: just so much easier so it's not. It seems like
Speaker 1: you do know your values, and it's almost like you
Speaker 1: want us to say it's okay to value that stuff.
Speaker 1: It's okay, it is, yes, fuck the latter, because you know,
Speaker 1: we live.
Speaker 3: In this society, you know, Mandy. Everything is go go, go, hustle, hustle, hustle,
Speaker 3: you know, and I fall victim to that sometimes. But
Speaker 3: it's like, at the end of the day, it's only
Speaker 3: cute for a two second post on Instagram and then
Speaker 3: you have to actually live the real life, you know,
Speaker 3: like so I promise.
Speaker 1: Got promoted team no.
Speaker 2: Sleep dying over here, like no Sleep.
Speaker 3: So yeah, it sounds like you know, like like Manna said,
Speaker 3: it sounds like you know, you know what you're wanting
Speaker 3: to do, and you're just wanting to be like, is
Speaker 3: it okay what you think is like, am I wrong
Speaker 3: for not being quote unquote ambitious. No, it's not lack
Speaker 3: of ambition. You are allowed to say, you know, this
Speaker 3: is not the environment I want to work in. Although
Speaker 3: I do love teaching, I want to work in a
Speaker 3: different environment. That's why, honestly, I left the school system
Speaker 3: because I love teaching and it was making me hate
Speaker 3: to because I just didn't feel like it was conducive
Speaker 3: to the way that I wanted to show up for
Speaker 3: the people that I was serving. And at first I
Speaker 3: was like, I'm never going back to teaching again.
Speaker 2: I hate it.
Speaker 3: And then I was like, oh wait, I actually really
Speaker 3: loved teaching. I just didn't love within the confines of
Speaker 3: where I was working. So you are allowed to You
Speaker 3: are allowed to take your dream. It's like take your
Speaker 3: ball and go home. You're allowed to take your dream
Speaker 3: and go someplace else where you feel at home.
Speaker 1: A man's sister friend ash check fuck away.
Speaker 2: I like that Amen's sister friend.
Speaker 1: I'm putting it on a T shirt. All right, Well,
Speaker 1: thank y'all again for your questions. Again, you can hit
Speaker 1: us up on Insta, on email, or you can text
Speaker 1: or leave us a voicemail a brief ish voicemail, and
Speaker 1: we'll put the number for our voicemail in the show notes.
Speaker 1: So check it out and can't wait to hear from y'all.
Speaker 2: And now it's time to boost a break A boost
Speaker 2: a break. Is you gonna boost? Is he gonna break?
Speaker 2: What you're gonna do, What you're gonna do, what you're
Speaker 2: gonna do?
Speaker 1: Mandy, Oh well, let me get to my notes, because
Speaker 1: I wrap to write stuff down these days, because that's
Speaker 1: what the world has come to. Oh my goodness. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do a boost for myself because we well
Speaker 1: a boost and a break. I will boost the fact
Speaker 1: that we made a parenting decision today Rio in daycare.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, we made two big parenting decisions. I
Speaker 1: have to say my dog, Molly. Y'all have an heard
Speaker 1: about Molly, Poor Molly. No one even asks about her.
Speaker 2: About Rio.
Speaker 1: I mean, Molly, we still about Rio like my phone.
Speaker 1: The phone. Like the phone is not even a competition
Speaker 1: the number of photos of the baby versus the dog.
Speaker 1: But anyway, Molly is in a six week intensive dog
Speaker 1: training program. Yeah, so we made that big decision. We
Speaker 1: decided to give her. We just she's a rescue and
Speaker 1: anyone who's you know, has adopted a rescue. It was
Speaker 1: my first time adopting my having a dog on my
Speaker 1: own as an adult period, let alone a rescue animal.
Speaker 1: I underestimated how much time and how much skill you
Speaker 1: need to have to be a dog owner. It's not easy.
Speaker 1: You can't just get them and give them treats and
Speaker 1: they're perfect. So anyway, she's in training, and we're yeah,
Speaker 1: so Rio, we decided this summer is it, We're going
Speaker 1: to put him in daycare. A lot of people are
Speaker 1: getting vaccinated here in New York, and it seems safe kids.
Speaker 1: I have friends, you have kids, and they've been in
Speaker 1: daycare for months, if not the past year, and they've
Speaker 1: been okay. And honestly, my house and.
Speaker 4: Not take it, y'all, Like this little tornado what I
Speaker 4: tell you. I'm like, he just needs he just needs
Speaker 4: an open field, maybe like you know, with like a
Speaker 4: mile long treadmill and just let him run, you know.
Speaker 1: So I am very very excited. I was like, can
Speaker 1: you imagine how much cleaner the house would be if he, like,
Speaker 1: for eight hours a day just was fucking up someone
Speaker 1: else's roun Like, I'm so excited, But beyond that, I'm
Speaker 1: just excited for him to interact with other children. We've
Speaker 1: had a couple of like test playdates with cousins of
Speaker 1: trusted family, and he's so cute and bossy, and he
Speaker 1: like takes all the big kids toys and he he
Speaker 1: he clearly is loving like playing and interacting. So I'm
Speaker 1: doing that and there's there goes my my two thousand
Speaker 1: dollars a month for daycare, which sucked. So today we
Speaker 1: went and put down that deposit. But it felt it
Speaker 1: felt like a real parenting decision that I made, So
Speaker 1: you know, that's good. Yay, and thank you to all
Speaker 1: of our child care providers and across the country for
Speaker 1: keeping our baby safe. And what I wanted to also
Speaker 1: boost was a cute little story that I read about
Speaker 1: a young girl I think she was seven. Did you
Speaker 1: see that she wrote a letter to Old Navy as
Speaker 1: part of like a class project. No, she wrote a
Speaker 1: letter to Old Navy asking them, can you please put
Speaker 1: real pockets on the girl pants? Because I don't think
Speaker 1: all their pants have no pockets, but some of the
Speaker 1: girl like leggings or jeggings that she had been that
Speaker 1: she had didn't have real pockets. And Old Navy's product
Speaker 1: team sent her a letter back, excuse me, and with
Speaker 1: a lot of with the with some actual genes with
Speaker 1: real pockets too, and it was really cute. So shout
Speaker 1: out to Karen is that her name or Cameron Gardner
Speaker 1: for writing the essay. It reminded me of Megan Markle
Speaker 1: and how she like one of the first one of
Speaker 1: my favorite stories about her is how she wrote a
Speaker 1: letter to like a dish soap company.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I remember that because I only.
Speaker 1: Had women or something doing dishes. Yeah, so a little
Speaker 1: Megan Markle on the making.
Speaker 2: Yes, I love that.
Speaker 3: Well, I'm going to all break. So we lost DMX,
Speaker 3: I know, so.
Speaker 1: Does it remain take it heard?
Speaker 3: No, But it's just so crazy because you don't I
Speaker 3: didn't realize just how much of a role you know,
Speaker 3: like when DMX came out, he was a force, you know,
Speaker 3: like a force, and he changed the landscape of music
Speaker 3: and my high school and college years is just was
Speaker 3: like DMX just you just hear how other people talked
Speaker 3: about him, just like how you know, although obviously he
Speaker 3: had his own demons, just the lover of spirituality that
Speaker 3: he possessed and how it felt to be around him.
Speaker 3: He was imperfect in all ways and he you know,
Speaker 3: was clear about that, but he was clear that he
Speaker 3: was fighting to be better that you know, he suffered
Speaker 3: an immense abuse as a child and so as a result,
Speaker 3: it was reflected in some of his life choices. But
Speaker 3: you know, it's sad to hear, you know, someone passing
Speaker 3: that's left an imprint.
Speaker 2: And so yeah, I just wanted.
Speaker 3: To like say like, yeah, it was just like, oh, man,
Speaker 3: I was listening to his music, I'm like, wow, this
Speaker 3: is a man tormented but as also at the same
Speaker 3: time joyful and so many young brothers that I said.
Speaker 3: It was like, Yo, he's the first time I thought like, wow,
Speaker 3: I can like believe in God and it's not some
Speaker 3: corny stuff, you know what I mean, Like because DMX
Speaker 3: was very open with his like beliefs, and he was
Speaker 3: like a real dude, you know, quote unquote, like you know,
Speaker 3: no one would ever say DMX is soft.
Speaker 2: He wasn't putting on.
Speaker 3: That was just him from Yonkers, like that's that was
Speaker 3: how he behaved cameras on or off. And yet you
Speaker 3: saw him dancing to Michael Jackson and jam and you
Speaker 3: saw him holding his daughter's hand when you know, they
Speaker 3: went on a roller coaster and she was so scared.
Speaker 2: I mean, he just was so right. That was cute.
Speaker 1: I felt a little embarrassed, Like that was the first
Speaker 1: thing I thought. I was remember that clip.
Speaker 2: You know, he's like I got you here, that is here.
Speaker 3: But he sound like his normal DMX voice olf and
Speaker 3: you were like, oh, he always talks like that, So yeah,
Speaker 3: just like you know, there just seems to be a
Speaker 3: lot of loss and then another loss too. I know
Speaker 3: it's kind of a downer, but I don't know if
Speaker 3: I remember if you asked me before, but I've been
Speaker 3: using this skincare company called the butter Bar Skincare.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you talked about them because they were featured
Speaker 1: on Target or something like that, like a black business
Speaker 1: brand of Target. Did I make that up anyway? Yes,
Speaker 1: you've mentioned.
Speaker 3: But I love the butter Bar, like I got really
Speaker 3: sensitive skin, and when I tell you, everything breaks me out,
Speaker 3: like I can just think about it and it breaks
Speaker 3: me out. And so the young woman who started the
Speaker 3: butter Bar, her name was Kimberly. She passed away, Kimberly
Speaker 3: Chloe Wilson. I'm not sure from what it seemed like
Speaker 3: she was battling some illnesses, but she leaves behind four
Speaker 3: small children and a husband. And I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 3: It hit me kind of hard because I thought to myself,
Speaker 3: this is a woman, you know, she created this amazing
Speaker 3: business that was really blowing up. When I tell you
Speaker 3: her her stuff, She's got this melanin drops transformed my
Speaker 3: skin Like people were like, what are you using like
Speaker 3: my Leela, who does my makeup. It's always like whatever
Speaker 3: you're using, continue because you know, no one sees your
Speaker 3: skin like your makeup artists, you know. And so yeah,
Speaker 3: so apparently she's been struggling. I'm not sure what the
Speaker 3: illnesses were, but she'd been struggling with them for some
Speaker 3: time and she recently had like back to back strokes
Speaker 3: as a result. And she was a young woman and
Speaker 3: she didn't she didn't make it. And so it was
Speaker 3: just a reminder of like, you know, as a fellow
Speaker 3: business owner, you know, and not to say she did this.
Speaker 3: It seemed like she lived like a more balanced life
Speaker 3: than I do. But it's just a reminder of like, yeah,
Speaker 3: what it's all said and done, Like what's really really important?
Speaker 3: You know? Yeah, That's why I was just like Tiffany,
Speaker 3: you've got this. You know, you have this big check
Speaker 3: mark that you checked off. Like your dreams and goals
Speaker 3: it's okay, Like they're not going anywhere. Sis, Like you
Speaker 3: could pick that up later, Like I need you to relax, rejuvenate,
Speaker 3: like reconnect. These dreams will be here and you don't
Speaker 3: you don't have to pursue them with every bit that
Speaker 3: you have in you can save bits for other things.
Speaker 3: So it's just a re reminder of that, you know
Speaker 3: that life is shortened.
Speaker 2: We just we really don't.
Speaker 3: Know when or how or why, and but you want
Speaker 3: that when it is your turn, you can really look
Speaker 3: and say, you know, well done in all aspects of
Speaker 3: your life.
Speaker 1: So well that business continue, I believe.
Speaker 3: So, So if you're wanting it's my butter bar skin,
Speaker 3: that's at that's their ig. It looks like it will
Speaker 3: because I know and she obviously had a team, so
Speaker 3: it looks like it will. They've been posting like videos
Speaker 3: and things of her and you know, like, honestly, this
Speaker 3: stuff is just amazing.
Speaker 2: It's not cheap. I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 3: The first time I brought it, I was like, okay,
Speaker 3: it's this, but I mean transform my skin, you know,
Speaker 3: within a few weeks. Like I said, for someone who
Speaker 3: has highly sensitive skin, I can't even use certain chapsticks
Speaker 3: as my lips blow up. So yeah, for it to
Speaker 3: be all natural, I keep it's all natural. Like literally,
Speaker 3: you keep her stuff in the refrigerator when you're ready
Speaker 3: to use it.
Speaker 2: So yeah, that was it.
Speaker 1: Well, rest in peace. What's her name? Kimberly Kimberly Chloe
Speaker 1: rest in peace, and my heart goes out to her family.
Speaker 1: And I am going to go get some butter bar
Speaker 1: right now, right now, I'm skincare obsessed. These days, I've
Speaker 1: been looking on my name face way too long on
Speaker 1: zoom day after day. That's not a downer, I mean
Speaker 1: it's nice. I mean we have to pay respects, all right,
Speaker 1: all right.
Speaker 2: DMX, Yes, hopefully you guys have it amazing week. We
Speaker 2: will see you next week. Do we have a guest
Speaker 2: next week?
Speaker 1: We do not have a guest next week, but stay
Speaker 1: tuned because we have some really exciting guest co hosts
Speaker 1: coming up. When Tiffany's you know, off on her rejuvenation
Speaker 1: vacations plural, we are still going to be going strong,
Speaker 1: So we're getting our ducks in a row. And also
Speaker 1: just quick shout out to the Nineteenth. They're hosting us
Speaker 1: at their virtual sum at April twenty nine, so we'll
Speaker 1: post a link to where you guys can register. It's
Speaker 1: a free virtual summit all about how you can bounce
Speaker 1: back from the COVID nineteen pandemic and the impact to
Speaker 1: your finances.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I can't wait. I can't wait another minute all Right, bestseller,
Speaker 2: al Rightmandra until next week
Speaker 1: Until next week,