Speaker 1: But I invited you here. I thought I made myself
Speaker 1: perfectly clear.
Speaker 2: But you're a.
Speaker 1: Guest to my home. You gotta come to me empty,
Speaker 1: And I said, no, guests, your presences presents enough. I
Speaker 1: already had too much stuff, So how did you dare.
Speaker 2: To surbey me?
Speaker 3: Welcome to? I said, no gifts. I'm Richard Wineger. The
Speaker 3: year is coming to a close. We're in the backyard,
Speaker 3: twenty twenty three. Goodbye, another perfect year on Earth, flawless.
Speaker 3: I'm one episode behind on Real Housewives of Solaic City.
Speaker 3: I can feel my life just spinning further and further
Speaker 3: out of control. Oh, let's get into the podcast. I'm
Speaker 3: just thrilled to talk to today's guest because well, we'll
Speaker 3: get into it. It's Emily Altman. Hi, Emily, Welcome to.
Speaker 3: I said, no case.
Speaker 2: Oh thank you. I'm so excited to be here and
Speaker 2: to talk to you.
Speaker 3: People have been telling me, no exaggeration, for seven years, yeah,
Speaker 3: that I need to meet you, or saying, oh, you
Speaker 3: haven't met her, or yes, you would love her, So
Speaker 3: there's a lot of pressure.
Speaker 2: It's the same on my side, and also that like
Speaker 2: oh you you go. You guys love each other, so
Speaker 2: there's there's some pressure.
Speaker 3: I think we're going to find out what other people
Speaker 3: assume about us, right, whatever they think is going to
Speaker 3: connect us. I feel like one of the early things
Speaker 3: was cats.
Speaker 2: Oh like the musical or the I wish it was
Speaker 2: the music. See Okay, so that we're already in it
Speaker 2: because I've I've seen the musical and I'm fine with it.
Speaker 2: But I am into the animal.
Speaker 3: The animal itself.
Speaker 2: Do you have a cat current my beloved fun way
Speaker 2: to start the podcast? My cat, my beloved cat just
Speaker 2: passed away, the pet Death podcast, So we're going to
Speaker 2: start with that. But he did. He was awesome though,
Speaker 2: he's always I'm always happy when he's brought up. How
Speaker 2: old was he thirteen?
Speaker 3: Okay, that's a decent I think.
Speaker 2: So that's when you start to think, like it's not
Speaker 2: like he was so young, like you know, he was thirteen.
Speaker 3: He's like a like a seventy year old man dying.
Speaker 3: I would say, yes, exactly fine, which is fine.
Speaker 2: What was his name? Lionelton to Roney, Oh, that's a
Speaker 2: lovely name. I usually called him just Lionel though.
Speaker 3: Sure.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: I feel like long cat names quickly become almost a
Speaker 3: sound exactly.
Speaker 2: I never used it. I only use his Christian name,
Speaker 2: but I did. Do you have a cat?
Speaker 3: I oh, my cat situation. I don't currently have a cat.
Speaker 3: I had two cats. We can get into that, but
Speaker 3: go on.
Speaker 2: Oh, I was just going to say about names that
Speaker 2: one thing that I do think is really adorable is
Speaker 2: when you go to the vet and they come out
Speaker 2: and they call and they use your last name and
Speaker 2: so sweet and it's it's just it's like, you know,
Speaker 2: like Waffles O'Brien and you're like, oh, I just I
Speaker 2: always loved it when they were like Lionel Altman and
Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, that's his full.
Speaker 3: Name, his legal person. Yeah, just for a minute, he's
Speaker 3: just fully realized as a person. Yes, yeah, I don't.
Speaker 3: I had two cats, don't currently have cats. I'm cats
Speaker 3: sitting right now. Went and met the cat today. It
Speaker 3: would not let me touch it.
Speaker 2: Was it hissing and like aggressive or just running away shy,
Speaker 2: very shy.
Speaker 3: But it would come up and smell my hand, which
Speaker 3: I felt like was a nice move.
Speaker 2: I think it is. I think that's the first step
Speaker 2: and the next time you guys will be best friends.
Speaker 3: Yes, I mean I'm feeding at all kinds of foods.
Speaker 3: The person that I'm cat sitting for has three different things.
Speaker 3: Wet food, dry food, and then something that's called temptation.
Speaker 2: Oh yes, I know about temptations.
Speaker 3: I wasn't familiar with temptations.
Speaker 2: They love it.
Speaker 3: I'm putting in a bowl like it's food for it,
Speaker 3: but it seems to be a treat.
Speaker 2: It's a treat, but it has a texture that no
Speaker 2: one can understand. It's not what you think it's. You
Speaker 2: know that some people use temptations to put medication in
Speaker 2: where I was like, but it's like, isn't it hard
Speaker 2: like a treat? And people were like, push, push into
Speaker 2: the temptation and see And I did because I tried
Speaker 2: to use it for medication for my cat and I
Speaker 2: was like, wow, it's it's eerily soft.
Speaker 3: I would see. I would have had no idea because I,
Speaker 3: you know, just grabbed a handful and dropped it in
Speaker 3: the bowl without squeezing. Well, you should always squeeze that
Speaker 3: first kind of juice, the cat food. Yes, yeah, that's important. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I love the name temptations. I don't love wet cat food.
Speaker 3: It's a lot of work just sliding out of the can. Yeah,
Speaker 3: it doesn't smell as bad as dog wet food, but
Speaker 3: it's still you know, I'm more of a dry cat
Speaker 3: food person now.
Speaker 2: Lionel's dry cat food. Whenever it came out of his feeder,
Speaker 2: I could smell it. This is going to make me
Speaker 2: sound really gross immediately, but I could like smell it
Speaker 2: for the next room. And sometimes I was like, hmmm,
Speaker 2: smells kind of like McDonald's. Like it kind of smelled
Speaker 2: a little bit like fast food. And I was like that,
Speaker 2: I mean, trying to put myself into his tiny walnut brain.
Speaker 2: I was like that, maybe that's delicious to him. Maybe
Speaker 2: it's his McDonalds.
Speaker 3: He must love it. Yeah, I mean, wow, I wonder
Speaker 3: if was it like a beef flavored or maybe it's
Speaker 3: smelled like chicken McNuggets.
Speaker 2: I think yeah, I think it was probably chickenwl an owl.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know that. I can't remember if I
Speaker 3: was loyal to a cat food brand while I had cats.
Speaker 3: But the smell was I mean, obviously the litter box
Speaker 3: was the big smell, the big smelling, which it's so
Speaker 3: shocking to me that we still have not quite developed
Speaker 3: a way to handle that.
Speaker 2: No, and when people train their cats to use the toilet.
Speaker 2: I'm always like, oh, well that that's kind of a solution,
Speaker 2: except that they can't flush. Yeah, it's just sitting, so
Speaker 2: it's just sitting there, which I was like, that sounds
Speaker 2: horrifying to me to like just walk you can't just
Speaker 2: walk in, or to have a friend walk in and
Speaker 2: doing it, yes, exactly, So that to me doesn't seem
Speaker 2: like a good solution either.
Speaker 3: Right, My great grandma trained her cat to use the toilet,
Speaker 3: but I that was before my time. I've never actually
Speaker 3: seen a cat use the toy.
Speaker 2: I just saw like a video that I'm not like
Speaker 2: a on like Instagram, where I was like, I don't
Speaker 2: I don't know if I believe this. That the woman
Speaker 2: was like when we had our toddler. At first like
Speaker 2: little Ricky their cat, Like Ricky was so jealous, but
Speaker 2: then he followed the toddler and did everything that toddler did,
Speaker 2: including when he was potty trained. Little Ricky started. No,
Speaker 2: he didn't do it by himself. There's no way.
Speaker 3: What is that person who's manufactured the dumbest possible story
Speaker 3: to become famous.
Speaker 2: Well, I saw it then and I was like, oh my,
Speaker 2: is it really that easy? There was just and then
Speaker 2: if that's the case, why don't they always watch all
Speaker 2: of us and just do everything that we do.
Speaker 3: I don't know, drive cars, make breakfast.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that is the one big sticking point for my
Speaker 3: boyfriend is the smell of the litter.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: And so we're not currently one. We also have a
Speaker 3: large dog that I was gonna say, have another animal. Yeah,
Speaker 3: so but at some point do you think you'll get
Speaker 3: another cat soon? Now?
Speaker 2: I think, interestingly you just mentioned your dog. I think
Speaker 2: now since I am in a moment of grief rip Linel,
Speaker 2: I was like, I don't want to. I almost in
Speaker 2: a way to like kind of honor his memory. It's like,
Speaker 2: I want to get another animal, but I think I'm
Speaker 2: going to go dog this time. Interesting just because like
Speaker 2: then after this dog, I'll be ready for another cat again.
Speaker 2: But I kind of like want a cat space right now,
Speaker 2: so that he is still the cat of my heart.
Speaker 3: Oh that makes perfect sense. Yeah, I should do that
Speaker 3: all the time. When someone gets the exact type of pet,
Speaker 3: I think, what are you doing? What's happening here? It's
Speaker 3: not the same animal, And now this animal has so
Speaker 3: much pressure.
Speaker 2: And sometimes they name them the same thing we've heard
Speaker 2: of that. I think that's like more of a child thing.
Speaker 3: It's like, yes, we had like Michelangelo one, Michelangelo two.
Speaker 3: We had. Unfortunately, the cats all lived outside and this
Speaker 3: was the early nineties, so we went through some cats.
Speaker 3: But I think we had at least three Michelangelos. Yeah,
Speaker 3: but an adult that names a pet the same. I
Speaker 3: don't know what to tell anybody. Do you have your
Speaker 3: eye on any type of dog?
Speaker 2: I do absolutely well. The dog breed is called the
Speaker 2: Klee Kai. Oh have you heard of it?
Speaker 3: I have never heard of it.
Speaker 2: Now, have you watched the Showtime docuseries Couples Therapy?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 3: I should.
Speaker 2: I think you would love it. It's great, but in
Speaker 2: it's you know, it's a docuseries about a therapist and
Speaker 2: she brings her dog to like her sessions, right, and
Speaker 2: the dog is this I saw this dog and I
Speaker 2: was like, I must know, like, what is this dog?
Speaker 2: It looks like a not I wouldn't say toy husky
Speaker 2: because it's not like that small, but it looks like
Speaker 2: kind of a shrunken husky A little bit.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm getting oh on a Lisa's got it. Oh,
Speaker 3: it looks a lot like.
Speaker 2: See, I think that's you can't see the context of
Speaker 2: the right.
Speaker 3: There's like a regular size, but it is like but
Speaker 3: it's almost yeah, Oh, here we go. Oh it's very cute.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's the one I have my eye. Clee ki
Speaker 2: clee Kai.
Speaker 3: Now are you someone who will go buy a dog
Speaker 3: or are you waiting for it to show up in
Speaker 3: a rest?
Speaker 2: I have looked at both with them. I obviously we're
Speaker 2: not going puppy mall. We know that. What a shame.
Speaker 3: This is a very pro puppet I have two puppy mills.
Speaker 2: Oh you do.
Speaker 3: I'm a breeder. Let's just be honest.
Speaker 2: I mean, I hear you. So I'm not going to
Speaker 2: do that. I don't. I really don't know. I'm just
Speaker 2: early stages of planning. I there are for a lot
Speaker 2: of the dogs that I like, there are specific rescues
Speaker 2: for them because people buy them and don't so there's
Speaker 2: like I also like Box a lot. There's an La
Speaker 2: Box to rescue. I like Siba e News. Although they're
Speaker 2: not supposed to be affectionate and I can't do that.
Speaker 3: Oh if they're not, they're kind of cold. They're supposed
Speaker 3: to be cold, and that's not what I want for
Speaker 3: my animals. It look like an animal that would really
Speaker 3: want to like cuddle up to you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they look like they're smiling, but I but people
Speaker 2: are Like the way that my Sheiba shows affection is
Speaker 2: he comes into the room and sits on the other
Speaker 2: end of the couch from me, And I'm like, that's
Speaker 2: like a boy a fight with exactly like a withholding
Speaker 2: to me, it's like a withholding person.
Speaker 3: That's the opposite. That's a cat.
Speaker 2: Yes, but I forced my cat or I don't know
Speaker 2: if I forced Lionel into this, but Linel was very
Speaker 2: Lionel was a lap cat. Like Linel could be in
Speaker 2: a baby bear and he would have met. So that's
Speaker 2: my experience of cats too. It's like, I don't know,
Speaker 2: Maybe I bend animals to my will and just make
Speaker 2: them cuddle me.
Speaker 3: I think that's kind of what you have to do
Speaker 3: as a good mother or father. Yes, just break the
Speaker 3: animal's personality until it's your own.
Speaker 2: Yes, until you think, oh my gosh, I found the
Speaker 2: perfect animal for me, but I made him. Have you
Speaker 2: had a dog before I had? Growing up, we had
Speaker 2: a very bad, very scary miniature docs and who I
Speaker 2: love it? Who bit a lot, and my sister and
Speaker 2: I used to hide on the back of our couch
Speaker 2: and yell to our mom. He's in the biting phase
Speaker 2: because like something something would like click in his brain
Speaker 2: and he was not well. He was like not a
Speaker 2: well dog. So I had that, and then I didn't.
Speaker 2: I haven't had a dog in my adult life. My
Speaker 2: sister had one that I was very close to. It
Speaker 2: was a boxer rescue. Wonderful.
Speaker 3: Yeah, boxers are so loving a mini docs and that's snapping.
Speaker 3: I mean, I love it, but I've never had to
Speaker 3: own one.
Speaker 2: He was so cute. He was very cute.
Speaker 3: But I just love an animal with a horrible attitude
Speaker 3: that's threatening children, just running around the house biting ankles.
Speaker 2: Mean, triggered in ways that I don't understand. I don't
Speaker 2: know why. I don't know what set him off, but
Speaker 2: it was abusive. Oh I love it.
Speaker 3: Do you currently live in LA or New York?
Speaker 2: I live in New York, but I come out here
Speaker 2: a lot for work. So I'm here like since twenty sixteen.
Speaker 2: I've been out here like half the year.
Speaker 3: So what are you doing pet wise when you're traveling
Speaker 3: back and forth?
Speaker 2: Well, Linel would come with me on the plane right
Speaker 2: under the seat. Which is part of the reason I
Speaker 2: was looking at like a Clee Kai sized dog is
Speaker 2: because I'm.
Speaker 3: Looking at like, oh, very smart.
Speaker 2: It has to they've got to be able to jet
Speaker 2: blue under the seat and they have restrictions about height
Speaker 2: and weight right.
Speaker 3: Too, body shaming jet Blue? Okay? Interesting? And was a cat?
Speaker 2: Was he okay?
Speaker 3: Traveling because I've heard horror story.
Speaker 2: Well, it was among the more stressful experiences of my
Speaker 2: life every time, because you have to take them out
Speaker 2: at security, right, That's the big shock her with cats
Speaker 2: is like you have to take them out and there's
Speaker 2: like three hundred people watching you, and even a good
Speaker 2: cat might just lose their mind in that scenario.
Speaker 3: Do you know, Alie Waller?
Speaker 2: No, although that's another person that I've heard a lot about.
Speaker 2: We have a we have a friend in common who's
Speaker 2: always like he's me Ally.
Speaker 3: She's wonderful and a big animal lover and has and
Speaker 3: I hope I'm not misrepresenting the story, but I believe
Speaker 3: she was taking two cats through JFK and they, of
Speaker 3: course had she had to take them out of their kennels,
Speaker 3: took them out, and they peed on her. And this
Speaker 3: is pre flight.
Speaker 2: Oh god, and then just have to get on a
Speaker 2: plane like that. I'm very sorry to say that. It's
Speaker 2: not the first time I've heard that. I heard about
Speaker 2: the other thing that can also happen when a you
Speaker 2: understand where I'm going, yes, of course, which I yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2: That's that's that. Truly. I can't imagine anything worse than
Speaker 2: the whole flight. Everyone like, kill me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's just oh, that's it's horrible. I can barely
Speaker 3: be on a plane just in perfect scenario.
Speaker 2: What do you do to pass the time on a plane?
Speaker 2: I'm reading?
Speaker 3: I kind of mix, like if it's a LA to
Speaker 3: New York flight, it's basically read until I'm bored. They
Speaker 3: don't play a little Nintendo. Okay, maybe listen to a podcast.
Speaker 3: Probably do that while playing Nintendo.
Speaker 2: Some movies don't. I'm so interest and impressed that movies
Speaker 2: and TV didn't even make the list.
Speaker 3: They rarely make the list. If the flight is over
Speaker 3: six hours, I'll look into a movie. But I need
Speaker 3: a lot of padding before and after the movie. So like,
Speaker 3: if a movie takes up half the flight, I don't
Speaker 3: get to.
Speaker 2: Do all my other things.
Speaker 3: Yes, I need to just basically have a little playtime
Speaker 3: that's very structured. But yeah, I think that's what I do.
Speaker 3: And then I, you know, resent whatever's near me and
Speaker 3: think about how much I hate them.
Speaker 2: You never talk right, or do you?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: I can't talk unless I'm forced into it.
Speaker 3: What do you do? How do you entertain yourself?
Speaker 2: I'm movie and TV okay, I like download stuff.
Speaker 3: On my You're not just dealing with whatever they slop.
Speaker 2: They give you sometimes for fun, like on this last
Speaker 2: flight I did. I was like, let me see what
Speaker 2: they have on offer, but like I had already curated
Speaker 2: my own selections, and that's how I ended up watching.
Speaker 2: I think no hard feelings that like about it. I
Speaker 2: was sort of like, this is a perfect environment to
Speaker 2: watch them.
Speaker 3: It's like an ideal plane.
Speaker 2: Yes, so that's mostly what I do. And then I also,
Speaker 2: I have like no budget for bad magazines, Like I's
Speaker 2: shocking how much I'll get like five or six like
Speaker 2: a S Weekly Life Style in Style, truly, whatever the
Speaker 2: versions of US Weekly are. I get them all and
Speaker 2: I read. I always read them on the plane, and
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 3: I that's such a great idea. I obviously I read
Speaker 3: every cover of those magazines, but I never I need
Speaker 3: I need to subscribe. Let's be honest.
Speaker 2: I did to US Weekly for a while, which even
Speaker 2: close friends were like that, that's crazy, and I was like,
Speaker 2: I but you mentioned I'm just going to say, you
Speaker 2: mentioned Real Housewives just to yourself at the beginning of
Speaker 2: this podcast, and I'm like, that makes me think that
Speaker 2: the content in these magazines would also be a massage
Speaker 2: to your.
Speaker 3: Brain as Yeah, I mean, I would just love it.
Speaker 2: Often it's the same stories in every magazine too, which
Speaker 2: is kind of funny. And the stories are you know,
Speaker 2: they're nothing, But now what else had you curated for
Speaker 2: your flight that you ended up not watching? Well, sometimes
Speaker 2: I like give myself like homework, like you should watch this.
Speaker 2: Everyone's been talking about this incredible series on and then
Speaker 2: I download like six of them and then I look
Speaker 2: at it and I'm like, oh, I don't do that,
Speaker 2: but I think I oh, I think I'm still I
Speaker 2: still haven't watched, and I know I'll love it. The
Speaker 2: New j the Julia Child HBO I have. Everyone says
Speaker 2: it's great. I was just like, and I love her.
Speaker 2: What's not till? But I'm just sort of like, I
Speaker 2: feel like I've there's been a lot of Julia Child
Speaker 2: content in my life, and sometimes I feel like, as
Speaker 2: much as I love her, I was like, oh no,
Speaker 2: we're revisiting her again.
Speaker 3: Okay, we have to about every eight years revisit. Have
Speaker 3: somebody take the mantle of playing Julia. Yes, it's an
Speaker 3: important cultural thing for whatever reason. Are there multiple seasons
Speaker 3: of that show?
Speaker 2: Its season two is out now. And I saw like
Speaker 2: a massive billboard on sunset today that was like Julia's back.
Speaker 2: It was like, I gotta see this version.
Speaker 3: No, am I misremembering this or did Julia Child? Was
Speaker 3: she like a spy at some point?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: God, that that feels true. And then my question is
Speaker 2: was it her husband or her husband? But then her
Speaker 2: to be a spy, her to be undercovered. Okay, that's
Speaker 2: the next series.
Speaker 3: Yes, okay, so you didn't watch that. I haven't watched that,
Speaker 3: so I guess no one's watching it.
Speaker 2: Somebody is and they're telling us that we should watch it.
Speaker 2: Then it's good. I do Real Housewives save which ones
Speaker 2: are you watching? I get around to all of them
Speaker 2: right now. I just came out of New York and
Speaker 2: I'm very into Beverly Hills right now, but I'm obviously
Speaker 2: Salt Lake is amazing as well, and I've got it.
Speaker 2: But usually in one I'm kind of like focused on
Speaker 2: that and then I bounce to the next.
Speaker 3: Yeah, people who watch multiple franchises at once, I don't
Speaker 3: know how. I feel like that's like a weird nightmare
Speaker 3: thing where it all sorts to blur together and then
Speaker 3: you're seeing this person. It doesn't make sense to me.
Speaker 3: I need a nice focused watching the gals, yeah, that
Speaker 3: I can move to the next city.
Speaker 2: Yes, It's almost as if when I watch one franchise,
Speaker 2: all of the other ones don't exist, Like I forget
Speaker 2: about it in a way that I like, which is
Speaker 2: sort of like New Jersey in the past has been
Speaker 2: my favorite, Atlanta has been my favorite, and when I'm
Speaker 2: watching them, I'm sort of like, this is the only
Speaker 2: ill housewives. But then you know, then I see a
Speaker 2: new one that I love.
Speaker 3: And do you watch any other reality shows?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Oh yeah, I love Love is Blind. I've never
Speaker 2: watched Love. I can't recommend it enough.
Speaker 3: Is this the Netflix one where they're just like in
Speaker 3: a pod for a while talking to themselves.
Speaker 2: Yes, they're in a pod and then they go on
Speaker 2: dates in the pod and then one of somebody has
Speaker 2: to They don't have to, but they eventually someone proposes,
Speaker 2: and then they get They head towards the altar together,
Speaker 2: but now they see each other and where they like
Speaker 2: what they see. Have there been seasons where the person
Speaker 2: doesn't like what they see. Yes, but it's depending on
Speaker 2: your point of view. I was gonna say it's shockingly rare,
Speaker 2: but it's probably they just don't like that when that happens,
Speaker 2: or sort of like force them to stay together. But yes,
Speaker 2: occasionally it's very awkward and weird where we also you
Speaker 2: can tell kind of sometimes when they come out of
Speaker 2: the pod and maybe one person is really into it
Speaker 2: and the other person is sort of.
Speaker 3: Like, uh, like, is that the end of the season
Speaker 3: or do they continue.
Speaker 2: Once they see each other? Yes, because then they immediately
Speaker 2: go to their pre wedding preparation and the season this
Speaker 2: season it's it's the season ends with the weddings, and
Speaker 2: you don't know whether they're gonna get They decide at
Speaker 2: the altar whether they're gonna say I do or not,
Speaker 2: and all of their families are there, and friend, that's wonderful.
Speaker 3: God, this is very prison adjacent like you're on death
Speaker 3: row and we're following the whole journey.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is shocking to me. It is. It's very
Speaker 2: it's very intense also because I do believe that in
Speaker 2: the pods almost like a psychological experiment actually kind of.
Speaker 2: I think people do actually project and have the like
Speaker 2: chemicals released of falling in love. Like people are like, oh,
Speaker 2: it's all bullshit, but I'm like, I think because of
Speaker 2: maybe the prison like atmosphere, something does happen where people
Speaker 2: like think, I'm really in love with this person, and
Speaker 2: then they try to interact outside of that and it
Speaker 2: gets Then sometimes they're like, I don't know your last name.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I never mind, but real emotion happens.
Speaker 3: I need to watch that. I recently dipped my toe
Speaker 3: back into ninety Day Fiance, which I.
Speaker 2: Used to love a swal Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I've watched too much of that at one point
Speaker 3: and it had to just kind of back away.
Speaker 2: I think that was my experience too. I think I
Speaker 2: over overdosed on it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and the episodes I watched recently, I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: it is still I mean, it actually is way more
Speaker 3: wild than I can even remember. People just screaming at
Speaker 3: each other in front of the like during the confessional,
Speaker 3: things like fighting with each other. You usually saved that
Speaker 3: for like being in the wild. They fight and then
Speaker 3: they get into the thing and yeah, this is a
Speaker 3: ninety day. But I I'm shocked by how many people
Speaker 3: they continue to like, how do you cast that show?
Speaker 3: How were that there are that many people doing that?
Speaker 3: And also that want to appear on TV. I'll never
Speaker 3: understand it, but it's a nice thing to just flip
Speaker 3: on when you're traveling.
Speaker 2: I think, so Golden Bachelor, are.
Speaker 3: You I've never watched The Bachelor.
Speaker 2: I like Golden. I think you might like Golden.
Speaker 3: What is just called the Golden Golden? Like, is it
Speaker 3: significantly different than Bachelor Vanilla?
Speaker 2: Well, it is in that the while you know the
Speaker 2: conceit right, they're all older, the tone and the feeling
Speaker 2: is just much kinder. Oh interesting, which some people have
Speaker 2: been like, I don't like that, and I'm sort of like,
Speaker 2: it's kind of It's kind of nice and an interesting
Speaker 2: different show. There's very little like in fighting between and
Speaker 2: the stuff that they fight about is like sweet, like
Speaker 2: I think you're guacamole made my tummy hurt. It was
Speaker 2: like one of the fights between two of the two
Speaker 2: of the women the season, and it's like, that's not mean.
Speaker 2: So I'm enjoying it. I find it kind of soue
Speaker 2: that well.
Speaker 3: That sounds nice. Yeah, because the brief glimpses I've had
Speaker 3: of Regular Bachelor stressed me out in an enormous way,
Speaker 3: and seeing that many type of that person on television,
Speaker 3: I don't think I could sit through hours an hour. Yeah,
Speaker 3: so maybe I'll get into Golden Bachelor. I don't know. Well,
Speaker 3: there's something else I want to talk about. I was
Speaker 3: obviously very excited. I've been counting down the days from
Speaker 3: basically twenty sixteen, I think is when I first started
Speaker 3: hearing about you. When am I going to meet Emily Altman?
Speaker 3: What will take place? Yeah, we'll she live up to
Speaker 3: my expectations that people are building and building and building.
Speaker 3: So I was happy that you wanted to come on
Speaker 3: the podcast, and I was looking forward to this evening.
Speaker 3: Did I say it was a night at the beginning
Speaker 3: of the podcast the listener, I think a listener needs
Speaker 3: to know that darkness has descended on the podcast. It's
Speaker 3: deep night. A coyote could jump over the fence at
Speaker 3: any point back to what we're talking about. I was
Speaker 3: a little shocked. I was a little surprised when you
Speaker 3: came a knocking and you were holding what, from where
Speaker 3: I'm sitting, appears to be a gift. It's a gift
Speaker 3: A podcast is called. I said, no gifts.
Speaker 2: I knew that.
Speaker 3: So interesting You're owning it.
Speaker 2: I mean, what else can I do at this point?
Speaker 2: I feel like I feel like I have to own it.
Speaker 2: Egg all over your face, covered an egg, dripping egg.
Speaker 3: Well, uh, I don't know if show I open it
Speaker 3: here on the podcast, I want you to. Okay, Well,
Speaker 3: it's a very interesting wrapping. Uh, kind of a tissue
Speaker 3: with Oh is this Salvador dwelling on it?
Speaker 2: I believe it is, and it says live it up.
Speaker 2: I think it's a libertine. Okay, but I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: say anything more.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm gonna open in the Oh. Yeah, the ribbon
Speaker 3: does save libertine and so ripping, crumpling, ripping, ripping, ripping.
Speaker 3: Oh what Wow, this is a butter sculpture of turkey.
Speaker 3: I've never seen one of these before.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 3: It's about the size of a I would say the
Speaker 3: size of a hummingbird. But it's a turkey, and it's
Speaker 3: a different bird.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so that's a.
Speaker 3: Little different than a humming. Tell me what's going on here?
Speaker 2: Well, we are in the Thanksgiving season, yes, and I
Speaker 2: just thought this would be, you know, a festive friend
Speaker 2: that you can have around. Also doesn't have to be
Speaker 2: for Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3: Oh, of course, save it for Valentine's Day, but.
Speaker 2: It could be cute. It could be cute on any tablescape.
Speaker 2: I think, Oh yeah, Easter is just around the corner.
Speaker 2: We never know an Easter is. Wow, it's lovely. I mean,
Speaker 2: where do you buy something like this local grocery is?
Speaker 2: And I kept him frozen until I came over here,
Speaker 2: so he's still I think it's okay for him to
Speaker 2: be out and chilling. And I'm just saying, if you
Speaker 2: at some point want to get him in a fridge,
Speaker 2: there's no rush.
Speaker 3: Well, I feel like I'm confused about how you're supposed
Speaker 3: to store butter actually, because I feel like, growing up,
Speaker 3: my mom just had butter on a plate in the cupboard.
Speaker 2: That's what they do in Europe. They'd never put it
Speaker 2: in they just the European way is, you know, the fringe.
Speaker 2: But yeah, so I I tried that Actually, for a
Speaker 2: couple of years I got like the thing on your counter.
Speaker 2: There's like a specific I forget what it's called, but it's.
Speaker 3: Like a little dome for terrarium essentially.
Speaker 2: Yeah, But then I felt like, am I going to
Speaker 2: get some disease from doing this?
Speaker 3: And I gave up, right, But I think it makes
Speaker 3: more sense to have it out because then it's usable.
Speaker 2: It's always soft.
Speaker 3: Yeah, if you're pulling it out of the fridge, you're
Speaker 3: not getting that on a piece of toast. Now you're
Speaker 3: scraping and scratched.
Speaker 2: Digging into the or pushing them a lot.
Speaker 3: The world break through, you might break through the bread
Speaker 3: to just you're squishing the toast and it's got like
Speaker 3: a slightly cold butter on it, the worst feeling in
Speaker 3: the world. So I like a room temperature butter. I mean,
Speaker 3: I don't practice what I preach. It's all in the
Speaker 3: fridge and I do a lot of baking, and every
Speaker 3: cookie recipe says room temperature butter, and so it's always
Speaker 3: me cheating or panicking. So I need to just be
Speaker 3: better about leaving butter out. Maybe this turkey could sit
Speaker 3: on my counter.
Speaker 2: I hope.
Speaker 3: So I wonder is it just normal butter. Can I
Speaker 3: use this in any way I want?
Speaker 2: I really think it's just normal butter.
Speaker 3: Interesting. I want to use this in a recipe. I
Speaker 3: don't even want to put it on toast or anything.
Speaker 3: Now it's so I guess it's if you had this
Speaker 3: at Thanksgiving, you'd be putting that on a roll.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I sort of imagined, is yeah, like
Speaker 2: next to the roles at the Thanksgiving table.
Speaker 3: Right, It's been a while since I've had a good roll.
Speaker 3: I feel like it's hard, Like when are you ever
Speaker 3: in a situation where rolls are presented?
Speaker 2: If they're on the menu at a restaurant, I get
Speaker 2: very excited, Like Parker rolls, Oh delicious that I get
Speaker 2: very excited because it feels yeah, it feels very like
Speaker 2: every day and yet we don't eat them every day.
Speaker 2: But restaurants usually don't offer them to me.
Speaker 3: I'm just have you ever been to Hippo and Highland Park? Yes,
Speaker 3: they have a role there. That is just that I
Speaker 3: would eat four plates of those roles now, that's what
Speaker 3: I want. I don't think I'm gonna have roles at Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3: I have a bad feeling. Why I just have I
Speaker 3: feel like.
Speaker 2: People prioritize roles. You could get them. Well, I'm in
Speaker 2: charge of pie. Oh okay, what kind of pie do
Speaker 2: you mean again?
Speaker 3: I got a what is known as a Derby pie,
Speaker 3: which is like chocolate pecan.
Speaker 2: Oh, i've made that before. I didn't know it was
Speaker 2: called that.
Speaker 3: I didn't either. I learned this over the phone when
Speaker 3: I said, you have a pecan pie and they said no,
Speaker 3: but we have Derby, which is chocolate pecan. They corrected you. Yes,
Speaker 3: it was a it was a cold phone call. It
Speaker 3: was icy. Oh so you're picking up pie picking. I'm
Speaker 3: not making them because I'm afraid of I've never made
Speaker 3: pie crust because that's too hard, so high steaks. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and that's something you need cold butter for. Yeah, that's
Speaker 3: why you have to have some butter in the fringe. Yes, no,
Speaker 3: I'm buying the pie. It seemed like a decent price
Speaker 3: for one. My grandma said I should have gone to Costco.
Speaker 3: Apparently they have six dollar pies. But I thought, I
Speaker 3: want this to be a very good pie rather than
Speaker 3: I feel like a six dollar pumpkin pie is not
Speaker 3: really what I'm looking for.
Speaker 2: No, yeah, I don't know pumpkin pie kind of honestly
Speaker 2: always sort of tastes the same to me, even if
Speaker 2: someone's like it's pumpkin in particular, I'm sort of like, Yep,
Speaker 2: this is what it tastes like when I have it,
Speaker 2: and I like it.
Speaker 3: But it's just kind of wet and sweet, and it's
Speaker 3: all coming from a can.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I don't think anyone makes fresh pumpkin pie.
Speaker 1: I do.
Speaker 2: I don't want it. There was pulp in there. I
Speaker 2: don't want that. You mention the strings.
Speaker 3: Strings cutting a piece of pumpkin pie and pulling it
Speaker 3: out and it's just strings.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, the inside of a jack o lantern
Speaker 2: directly into a Oh no.
Speaker 3: I mean, now that we're talking about this, I've never
Speaker 3: been I've never really thought about the process of how
Speaker 3: a pumpkin becomes whatever that is in the can, because
Speaker 3: that does not look anything like pumpkin.
Speaker 2: Not at all, not at all. And also that the
Speaker 2: texture alone is like, how do we get I am?
Speaker 2: I always thought it was like, did they put like
Speaker 2: cream in it and boil and gelatin.
Speaker 3: Right or is it straight on? At least we do
Speaker 3: some research here. I want to know if that's pure pumpkin.
Speaker 3: It looks like beef tallow or something.
Speaker 2: It's disgusting as marrow in it lardo, And.
Speaker 3: I'm not a pumpkin pie eater.
Speaker 2: Not for me. I get. I have the one a
Speaker 2: sliver once once a year. Maybe I also have it on
Speaker 2: Christmas too, but it's just a sliver. It's not my favorite.
Speaker 3: What's your pie?
Speaker 2: Pecan? And actually chocolate pecan probably would be.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I don't know why more people don't put
Speaker 3: chocolate and pecan pie. It's right there, it's right there.
Speaker 3: It's a perfect combination.
Speaker 2: It turns it into essentially around candy bar. That's when
Speaker 2: you when you get that slice. Sometimes you're eating it
Speaker 2: and you're like, these are flavors that I only have
Speaker 2: experienced in a candy bar report, never like on my
Speaker 2: plate on a lease. I just read a very disturbing sentence.
Speaker 4: So this isn't the disturbing sentence, but basically, have to
Speaker 4: roast the pumpkin, and it says once the pumpkin is roasted,
Speaker 4: to throw the softened flesh into a.
Speaker 2: Food process or blend until smooth. Easy. I got goosebumps. Wait,
Speaker 2: does that mean that the exterior of the pumpkin is
Speaker 2: in the pie as well as it does.
Speaker 3: I think it's a whole hog, not the.
Speaker 2: Vine, not the curly vinyl say tip to tail, Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: tip to is that what the fra to use every
Speaker 2: part of the pumpkin.
Speaker 3: They're not putting the stem in there.
Speaker 2: And I hope they're not putting the stem or that
Speaker 2: curly vine that I keep sitting in my mind's eye.
Speaker 3: The curly vine. Yeah, that has little spikes on it,
Speaker 3: and it makes the pumpkin less fun. I'll say that. Yeah, okay, interesting.
Speaker 3: So people are making this weird wet stuff at home.
Speaker 3: They're roasting, their crunching, they're smoothing. I've never had I
Speaker 3: feel like it's the sort of thing where it's like
Speaker 3: the natural peanut butter wherever. You know, it's not all ketchup.
Speaker 2: When someone's like, we make our own ketchup, but I'm like,
Speaker 2: don't because it's not as good.
Speaker 3: I had a fanciish ketchup with dinner tonight, and I'm
Speaker 3: now revealing to you that I had dinner at five pm.
Speaker 3: But and I was just like, give me hines exactly
Speaker 3: what everyone wants all the time.
Speaker 2: This is I mean, I don't think I'm the only
Speaker 2: one who feels this way. But when I have fancy ketchup,
Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, this tastes like tomatoes, which is what
Speaker 2: it should taste like, but I don't want it to.
Speaker 3: But I actually don't think that's what it should taste like.
Speaker 3: I don't think that's why ketchup exists.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think there was. I think it's always
Speaker 2: been like a sweet, vinegary yeah thing, Yes, I prefer
Speaker 2: vinegar forward, kind of like sort of like, yeah, it's
Speaker 2: it's a dressing, it's a I was about to say
Speaker 2: that it's American, but I don't know that it's America.
Speaker 3: Yeah. We wonder where ketchup came from. Probably Germany.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you say ketchup, not calf cats up? Have
Speaker 2: you ever a mess who says cats up? But we
Speaker 2: know they exist somewhere.
Speaker 3: They must be somewhere on least, what are you saying here?
Speaker 2: Imperial China, China.
Speaker 4: Completely tomato free, So you guys are onto Okay, I'm
Speaker 4: not there yet.
Speaker 3: But it's pure viegar. It was the soft flesh.
Speaker 4: Interesting, it was made with fish and trails, meat by
Speaker 4: products and soybeans.
Speaker 2: Oh, this is pretty much the same thing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's almost exactly that's the ketchup we know and
Speaker 3: love kind of a classic thing. You find it a
Speaker 3: McDonald's or what have you. Okay, so the butter of
Speaker 3: the the pie, the rolls. What are you in charge
Speaker 3: of thanks for things?
Speaker 2: I'm actually bringing dessert myself and this is kind of
Speaker 2: I'm a little I brought this as a gift, but
Speaker 2: when i'm bringing, I'm going to my sister's for Thanksgiving
Speaker 2: and I'm bringing. Do you know about the Baskin Robbin's
Speaker 2: turkey cake?
Speaker 3: No, but I love whatever you're about to tell.
Speaker 2: Me, Well, I'm into as evidenced by your gift, like
Speaker 2: food that looks like other oh shored. I just think
Speaker 2: it's fun. And so this was like, I think an
Speaker 2: eighties thing that Baskin Robbins did, and then it went
Speaker 2: away because people were like, this is disgusting and has
Speaker 2: no taste. And then two years ago America was like,
Speaker 2: we love it, bring it back, and it is. It
Speaker 2: honestly looks like it's got to be like twenty pounds
Speaker 2: of ice cream. It's just a we're looking at a picture.
Speaker 2: It's just glazed looking. It looks exactly like a turkey.
Speaker 2: But when you cut it open, inside its cookies and cream,
Speaker 2: ice cream, or any ice cream flavor that you choose.
Speaker 2: I went with their traditional cookies and cream. So they
Speaker 2: make it there at the what do we call it
Speaker 2: a scoopery and ice cream and the Baskin Robins. Yeah,
Speaker 2: they make it there, and I pre ordered and you
Speaker 2: just go like any other of their ice cream cakes.
Speaker 3: Okay, I've had their. I mean I love their other
Speaker 3: normal ice cream cakes.
Speaker 2: I hope it'll taste good like that. What's what's on
Speaker 2: the outside that looks like Okay, that's it. But the
Speaker 2: one thing I do really like is that the drumsticks
Speaker 2: are sugar cones. That sounds kind of fun and maybe
Speaker 2: you get a little ice I mean, maybe it'll be fun.
Speaker 3: I haven't been to Baskin Robinson a long time. How
Speaker 3: was it holding up? Ice cream wise?
Speaker 2: I don't think it's very good. I just I was like,
Speaker 2: by the time I get to the end of the sentence,
Speaker 2: maybe all it'll land a little differently, maybe we'll soften it.
Speaker 2: But I was like, I don't, I don't. I don't
Speaker 2: think it's it's sort of the most basic I think, right,
Speaker 2: not very junk foody tasting ice cream.
Speaker 3: I hate to hear that. Yeah, because now we've kind
Speaker 3: of entered the salt and straw or Jenny's phase, which
Speaker 3: is very good ice cream, but it's unbelievably expensive.
Speaker 2: And also I don't need the like that's so artisanal,
Speaker 2: Like I don't need like lavender ice cream. I like mcconnald's.
Speaker 2: I feel like mcconnall's right. Yes, they have like a
Speaker 2: peanut butter flavor. Yes, just give me treats, put candy
Speaker 2: in there. Yes, that's why I'm here. I'm not here
Speaker 2: for my health. Literally, I mean, I'm not here to
Speaker 2: eat a flower, but they want me to.
Speaker 3: McConnell's is very good, but uh, I actually held a
Speaker 3: birthday party at the one in those Felis a few
Speaker 3: years ago and then it shut down.
Speaker 2: And quickly you got in there before it was only
Speaker 2: opened so briefly.
Speaker 3: Well, it's because there were nineteen ice cream stores in
Speaker 3: that neighborhood. Yes, only one, and I think only one
Speaker 3: is still remaining. Jenny's standis because there was the other
Speaker 3: one that was part of that whole What was that
Speaker 3: called that like Steven Spielberg was investing in and it
Speaker 3: was they had a factory in Brooklyn.
Speaker 2: Oh, ample Hills, Ample Hills.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that was an interesting rise and fall of ice cream.
Speaker 2: Yes, they're They're in Brooklyn, where I live most of
Speaker 2: the time. They are back. They're back. They're back as
Speaker 2: in this summer, they came back. They rose from their
Speaker 2: chili creve and their back to serve delicious ice cream.
Speaker 2: And I really do Ample Hills is delicious and I
Speaker 2: love them. Wow. So have they changed anything? They were
Speaker 2: kind of the we work of ice cream. Yes, I
Speaker 2: thought that was. I don't know if you read the
Speaker 2: same article I did some.
Speaker 3: Long forms, so I have retained none of the information
Speaker 3: except for the feeling.
Speaker 2: Retained enough to say long form article. But then what
Speaker 2: I remember chilling me to the bone about it was
Speaker 2: it was like two kind of just like creative people
Speaker 2: that were like, all right, let's run a corporation. Let's
Speaker 2: like get it bigger and bigger and bigger. And then
Speaker 2: they got a certain point they were like, we don't
Speaker 2: know how to do business, Like we don't and sorry,
Speaker 2: we just signed a deal with Disney and Delta Red
Speaker 2: Flag and like they just started signing deals with huge
Speaker 2: corporations and then all the money it just kind of
Speaker 2: collapsed interesting. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I remember when like Mickey Mouse started appearing in the store.
Speaker 3: Is like something's gone wrong. Yeah, they have too many
Speaker 3: corporate sponsorships. They're in bed with too many billion dollar companies.
Speaker 3: What's happening to the ice cream?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: And then they all shut down. Yeah, is it still
Speaker 3: the husband and wife running?
Speaker 2: I think so. I think they're just starting all over again. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2: I'm happy for them, and the ice cream remains delicious.
Speaker 3: I'm rooting for them.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I feel like they were going to open an ice
Speaker 3: cream museum.
Speaker 2: It was.
Speaker 3: It was a little too ambitious. Yeah, just make some
Speaker 3: ice cream.
Speaker 2: Yep, that's all.
Speaker 3: What flavor ice cream is your favorite? What sort of
Speaker 3: stuff are you dealing with there? I love.
Speaker 2: Well, I do. When you said peanut butter cup before,
Speaker 2: that's that's a flavor combo that I always really enjoy,
Speaker 2: peanut butter and chocolate, a cookie in there. I like
Speaker 2: a nice crunch, Yes, a nice crunch, I don't. I
Speaker 2: tend to like things that have another thing within them
Speaker 2: rather than like vanilla, right, or just the one flavor right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, if I'm getting two scoops of ice cream,
Speaker 3: one can be the pure flavor, but one of them
Speaker 3: has to have some element in there that I'll be
Speaker 3: chewing at some point.
Speaker 2: Yep. Otherwise it's going to be a weird experience for it.
Speaker 2: If I have to get the plain flavor, and I would.
Speaker 2: I do sometimes get coffee.
Speaker 3: I like coffee, a coffee or a really dark chocolate.
Speaker 3: Oh wow, But the other things. Forget it, yeah, get
Speaker 3: it out of here. I was just talking to someone
Speaker 3: recently about how much dogs love peanut butter. I wonder,
Speaker 3: I like, humans and dogs are the only creatures who
Speaker 3: love peanut butter.
Speaker 2: It seems like it is, because you know, when you
Speaker 2: say that, I used to live in Italy and I
Speaker 2: spent a lot of time in Italy, and they hate
Speaker 2: peanut butter.
Speaker 3: They hate it.
Speaker 2: They think it's disgusting. What like, they don't understand peanuts
Speaker 2: in general. They're like, what the hell? But like I've
Speaker 2: said this before, but I was watching with a group
Speaker 2: of Italians that movie Meet Joe Black.
Speaker 3: Do you know, I remember I've never seen it, but.
Speaker 2: But it's I forget why. But the Brad Pitt character,
Speaker 2: I think, like, who's a ghost maybe or something. He's
Speaker 2: like always eating peanut butter and some of the Italians
Speaker 2: I was with hissed, they hissed, they hissed when he
Speaker 2: ate it, And like I've had Italians ask me like,
Speaker 2: you don't like peanut butter, right, like you don't, and
Speaker 2: I'm like I do, like I do love it. I
Speaker 2: think it's just like not. Maybe it's the way that
Speaker 2: we feel about like marmite or whatever, those like Australian things.
Speaker 3: Australian I was thinking about Duri and yeah, so I
Speaker 3: guess it's something you just have to be fed as
Speaker 3: a kid and you grow up with it. My dad
Speaker 3: hates peanut butter. Actually, interesting, huge rift between us about
Speaker 3: I'm exactly wow, but peanut butter to me just seems
Speaker 3: like it should be a universally loved food.
Speaker 2: I know. That's why it was so eye opening for me.
Speaker 2: Is I thought it was like, sure, I like water milk,
Speaker 2: peanut butter, Like I thought it was like one of
Speaker 2: the classic everyone that's all I need. But it's not.
Speaker 2: It's not. It's not.
Speaker 3: I mean I feel like whenever on Great British Bakeoff
Speaker 3: that peanut butter gets brought up, it almost feels like
Speaker 3: even to British people like this kind of exotic thing
Speaker 3: we're going to put in the dessert like this unconventional thing,
Speaker 3: where for me it's like I think that that should
Speaker 3: be in every dessert you make.
Speaker 2: I Oh my god, me too. I love at a
Speaker 2: restaurant when they are like, here's our elevated version of
Speaker 2: a Reese's cup or something I get so they could
Speaker 2: just bring out a Reese's cup, but I'm so excited.
Speaker 3: I was talking about this on the podcast recently about
Speaker 3: like if cheese It's were served to me at a restaurant,
Speaker 3: I'd be like I would be telling everyone about that
Speaker 3: restaurant like it's an incredible food, and same with like
Speaker 3: a Reese's.
Speaker 2: I've heard that cheese It's in red wine is like
Speaker 2: a very lovely Seriously, I've heard this, and I keep
Speaker 2: meaning to try that. It's like a very nice, like
Speaker 2: opera TiVo snap that the cheese in cheese. It's like,
Speaker 2: I'm ready for that to be true, and I'm just
Speaker 2: saying that it is even if it's not.
Speaker 3: That's an incredible little piece of information. I once held
Speaker 3: a like, instead of a wine and cheese party, amountain
Speaker 3: doing processed cheese party.
Speaker 2: And let's be honest, processed cheese is very good. It's wonderful.
Speaker 3: I mean, unless it's cold, then I'm in hell. I
Speaker 3: would rather eat raw chicken than a piece of uh,
Speaker 3: just like an American cheese raw. No, thank you god.
Speaker 3: How did we get here? That's always the question on
Speaker 3: this podcast is how did we end up with me
Speaker 3: talking about eating raw chicken? It doesn't matter.
Speaker 2: You keep looking at that bird chicken. Oh interesting, But
Speaker 2: that's what I was thinking, is don't forget that this
Speaker 2: is a bird too. Yeah, he's cute. Now, what are
Speaker 2: your plans for New Year's Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 3: I don't Year's person.
Speaker 2: No, I if something. Occasionally I've been, like done a
Speaker 2: trip with friends or things like that, but I do
Speaker 2: not put a lot of pressure on myself of like,
Speaker 2: this has got to be the best night of my life. Often,
Speaker 2: often i'm asleep before midnight. Beautiful far Often sometimes it's
Speaker 2: very comforting, actually, But I don't know. Maybe I'll do
Speaker 2: it either I'll like be with friends and go on
Speaker 2: a trip, or I'm not. I'm not a big New
Speaker 2: Year's party person, all right.
Speaker 3: I think going on a trip is probably the best solution.
Speaker 3: I've never done that before. It's usually just bad party,
Speaker 3: mediocre party yea, or watching one of these insane TV
Speaker 3: shows it's on that's just like a bunch of garbage,
Speaker 3: like a true parade of garbage for four hours. Yes,
Speaker 3: And then I go to sleep. Yeah, it's the one
Speaker 3: night of the year that I'm kind of okay going
Speaker 3: to bed before midnight.
Speaker 2: I oh, I go to bed pretty early anyway. But
Speaker 2: I also I don't mind just opting out of the
Speaker 2: whole thing. Sometimes it's kind of fun when you wake
Speaker 2: up in the morning and you're like, it's the next year.
Speaker 2: No like to go to sleep, And I don't know,
Speaker 2: I kind of I don't. I don't mind it.
Speaker 3: Are you a Halloween person? I feel like they're kind
Speaker 3: of cousin holidays. I yes, I like Halloween.
Speaker 2: I like the Halloween season, and I like spooky and
Speaker 2: scary things, right, But I think probably of the holidays,
Speaker 2: I like Christmas. I do.
Speaker 3: Christmas is a wonderful time.
Speaker 2: It is. I like it. There's so many lights up
Speaker 2: in your neighborhood already.
Speaker 3: My neighbors probably they must be like, oh, that man
Speaker 3: is so sad. I never decorate for anything, and my
Speaker 3: boyfriends and New York this year, so I won't even
Speaker 3: have a Christmas tree that's gonna it's gonna be just
Speaker 3: kind of a cold, sad place.
Speaker 2: You don't even get a tiny little target. I don't have. Also,
Speaker 2: when you're at home alone putting up a tree, sometimes
Speaker 2: it's not It feels better to just ignore.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it's just shut it down. I'll see a
Speaker 3: tree in New York at some point and that'll be enough.
Speaker 3: I but my neighbors are doing a good job. It
Speaker 3: just feels like I'm like the one light bulb that's
Speaker 3: not working on this string. But I only have so
Speaker 3: much energy.
Speaker 2: I understand.
Speaker 3: Only did you dress up for Halloween this year?
Speaker 2: I did not. I did not this year. I just wasn't.
Speaker 2: I wasn't feeling it. This year. I did. I did
Speaker 2: enjoy seeing other people's costumes, but I didn't get it
Speaker 2: together in time. I guess snuck up on me.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I have on and off years. There's some years where
Speaker 3: it just doesn't matter at all to me, and then
Speaker 3: there are other years are like, I'm going, I'm excited
Speaker 3: to put on a costume.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, if you feel it, if there's a party
Speaker 2: that you're excited about or like an event, then I
Speaker 2: will plan and get very excited about it, but I don't.
Speaker 2: Usually I don't. I don't do anything half asked. That's
Speaker 2: not true, but no one says that about Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: that's what I'm known for. But yeah, now, if if
Speaker 2: I'm not fully planning a costume.
Speaker 3: Then I just usually don't don't do anything. What was
Speaker 3: the least memorable costume you had?
Speaker 2: I really had a lot of fun. I did Flash
Speaker 2: Dance Jennifer Beale and Flash Dance, and that was a
Speaker 2: very satisfying costume because I could get all of the
Speaker 2: pieces you need for it to make an accurate costume. Yes,
Speaker 2: and then it just it was. It was satisfying in
Speaker 2: that way. It wasn't like that kind of like janky
Speaker 2: version of like who are you?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: I kind of this like you kind of almost don't
Speaker 2: understand how her outfit is like so iconic. But if
Speaker 2: you get all the pieces, then everybody knows exactly who
Speaker 2: you are.
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, I mean, speaking of janky costumes, I went
Speaker 3: as Mary Barry one year and it was a thing
Speaker 3: where I I simply looked like a frightening man. There
Speaker 3: was nothing about it that looked like an old British
Speaker 3: just kind of a cheap wig and uh sport code
Speaker 3: or whatever. Yeah, Halloween, butter, I feel like we've covered
Speaker 3: a lot of holidays stuff here. Are you gonna be
Speaker 3: back east for Christmas?
Speaker 2: No, I'm gonna be because my sister is out here.
Speaker 2: I just was like, and I'm gonna be here through
Speaker 2: the end of February. I was like, we'll do all
Speaker 2: the holidays together out here.
Speaker 3: Do you have nieces and nephews?
Speaker 2: I do. I have a niece and a nephew, and
Speaker 2: they're who I'm thinking of with that turkey cake. Wow,
Speaker 2: I think they're gonna they're gonna go think for a child,
Speaker 2: like it looks like a turkey, but it's ice cream
Speaker 2: on the inside. I think they'll be pretty.
Speaker 3: So they're gonna go. They're gonna be off the wall
Speaker 3: for that thing. Are you buying them Christmas presents? Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I'll get them.
Speaker 3: What is your process like? Because mine is deeply stressful
Speaker 3: for my niece's.
Speaker 2: Okay, So I always it's just I turn to my
Speaker 2: sister and I say what do they want? What is it?
Speaker 2: And then within that I try to be creative and
Speaker 2: fun and give my little twist, and sometimes I might
Speaker 2: add my own own thing that nobody asked for it,
Speaker 2: but I like to feel on solid ground and confident
Speaker 2: by getting them things that's somewhere in there that I
Speaker 2: know that they actually want. What ages are they seven
Speaker 2: and nine? Okay?
Speaker 3: Those are still like fun toy ages? Yes, yes, I
Speaker 3: just I ask my sister. But then I kind of
Speaker 3: ignore her because I think, oh, I want this to
Speaker 3: be such a unique, incredible present, and then I fail,
Speaker 3: Uh huh, why just listen to whatever she tells me.
Speaker 2: I understand that drive, though, because I want so badly
Speaker 2: them to open a present and be like, oh my god, right,
Speaker 2: I'm so moved, like, thank you.
Speaker 3: For being in my life exactly like you see me
Speaker 3: in a way that nobody else does.
Speaker 2: Thank you for this. I want, I want that that
Speaker 2: that hasn't really happened.
Speaker 3: No, I'm I'm personally just kind of waiting for them
Speaker 3: to be old enough to be excited about money. Oh yeah,
Speaker 3: when I can just buy a card and put some
Speaker 3: money in there and that's all they want in the world. Yeah,
Speaker 3: then I don't have to get online and look for
Speaker 3: what chapter books are good for a seven year old.
Speaker 3: This sort of thing, which is eventually is satisfying if
Speaker 3: you find something good, but you know, I might get
Speaker 3: one of my nieces. The mouse in the motorcycle, I
Speaker 3: hadn't thought about that in a long time.
Speaker 2: I actually don't know the mouse in the mouth, don't.
Speaker 2: I had a visual in my mind of a mouse,
Speaker 2: I hope, so driving a boat. I'm picturing like Richard's
Speaker 2: scary style. But that's not what it is.
Speaker 3: No, it's more realistic. And as someone who despises mice
Speaker 3: and rats, this should not be for me. But it's
Speaker 3: very cute. And then there's a movie, a live action movie,
Speaker 3: where there's a little mouse driving a motorcycle around. Who
Speaker 3: can ask for more? A Lisa, you're familiar with the
Speaker 3: mouse in the motorcycle. Everyone's looking at me like I'm
Speaker 3: out of my mind. I thought this was like Bones
Speaker 3: that it's like bear Bones. Description of like mouse and
Speaker 3: motorcycle was like, he doesn't even have a name. He
Speaker 3: just a mouse.
Speaker 2: I think it's Ralph.
Speaker 3: Okay, if it's Ralph, I mean, wow, I learned one
Speaker 3: thing reading it's Ralph.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, good.
Speaker 3: Oh, I'm thrilled. That really suck with me, and I
Speaker 3: feel like it's a whole series. It's a saga.
Speaker 2: Do you like other. Do you like Stuart Little? Do
Speaker 2: you like other?
Speaker 3: I never read Stuart Little? Okay, I read a book
Speaker 3: called The Cricket and Times Square.
Speaker 2: I think that was sounds familiar to me.
Speaker 3: Kind of had a big impact on me. You know,
Speaker 3: you love to hear about small creatures in.
Speaker 2: The big city.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, Stuart Little. Though I wonder why that skipped me.
Speaker 2: I don't remember particularly loving it, but it had like
Speaker 2: then there was a live action, and I just felt
Speaker 2: like one of those books that like everyone's like yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: like like Flat Stanley, which I do love. Did you
Speaker 2: you read Flat Stanley? You never read Flat Stanley? And
Speaker 2: the name of that is so scary. Why why does
Speaker 2: Flat Stanley sound so scary? Well, because if that story
Speaker 2: was just like one click to the left, it would
Speaker 2: be a horror movie.
Speaker 3: Is the story?
Speaker 2: Well, it's what you think. He's flattened. Oh, he's utterly flattened,
Speaker 2: but he's like supported by his community and everybody loves him,
Speaker 2: and so they put him in like enviolnce opes and
Speaker 2: send him around the world.
Speaker 3: And my mom did this. She's a kindergarten so she
Speaker 3: did send Flat Stanley around. Yeah, so I think I
Speaker 3: must have taken a picture of a flat Stanley, I
Speaker 3: think the beach or whatever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so that's it's about basically about what could be
Speaker 2: a horrific experience, but it's framed does like it's fun,
Speaker 2: Like he can travel everywhere. Look what he can do
Speaker 2: now that he's fully flat. That like nobody else could
Speaker 2: do what flattens him? I wish I could remember it can't.
Speaker 2: It must just be magic or something, right, It's not
Speaker 2: like there's no pain. There's the exactly I don't know.
Speaker 3: Maybe there was a pan, but there's no pain, no pain,
Speaker 3: Thank goodness.
Speaker 4: He's squashed flat by a bulletin board while sleeping. His
Speaker 4: last name is lamb Chop.
Speaker 2: Oh, lamb chop.
Speaker 3: Confusing by a bulletin board. I mean that's what happens
Speaker 3: when you follow sleep by over over his bed.
Speaker 2: I guess that's.
Speaker 3: Board Stanley lamb Chop. Yeah, flattened. I mean that is
Speaker 3: kind of a scary story.
Speaker 2: I loved it as a kid. I just thought that
Speaker 2: idea was so cool and fun though, that like he
Speaker 2: could try, like he a lot of it's about travel
Speaker 2: and how he does it for free. He can like,
Speaker 2: you know, like put him in a mailbox, put him
Speaker 2: in a padded envelope, like he can go wherever and
Speaker 2: nobody minds.
Speaker 3: Yeah I didn't. I thought that that was like a
Speaker 3: recent that book was a recent thing and it's been
Speaker 3: around for a minute.
Speaker 2: Then yeah, I think it's been around for a while.
Speaker 2: Like when I was growing up, there wasn't the thing
Speaker 2: in schools where people were doing it. But I did
Speaker 2: read it as okay, okay, yeah, I feel like we
Speaker 2: read a lot.
Speaker 3: I mean every version of the gingerbread Man. Oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: I feel like would go to this school cafeteria and
Speaker 3: get a gingerbread man or something. Not a gingerbread fan.
Speaker 2: Again, maybe once a year I'll have I'll have a
Speaker 2: small piece, write a bite, a bite, but I'm not
Speaker 2: consuming the full gingerbread product.
Speaker 3: No, no, I don't need that, although they do so.
Speaker 3: Have you ever had those little ice cream sandwiches that
Speaker 3: are ginger bread men?
Speaker 2: No, although that does sound good, I would try that.
Speaker 3: I remember those being very good, but again, this was
Speaker 3: when I was in elementary school. It could be a
Speaker 3: disgusting product.
Speaker 2: Like two men.
Speaker 3: It's in this small gingerbread men with vanilla ice cream.
Speaker 2: Oh that does sound really that calm see to me?
Speaker 2: Then we've got the ice cream to fall back on.
Speaker 2: So even if the cookie is not that great, right,
Speaker 2: I'd still I like an ice cream sandwich.
Speaker 3: So I love an ice cream sandwich. I'm not crazy
Speaker 3: about an ice cream sandwich that's made out of fresh cookies. No,
Speaker 3: it doesn't work.
Speaker 2: I like the traditional old like just the with the
Speaker 2: two like dark brown kind of bricks on either side,
Speaker 2: which those individually? What are those? They're not cookie.
Speaker 3: It's kind of like a tutsi roll situation where it's like,
Speaker 3: that's not chocolate, it's not cookie, it's what is.
Speaker 2: I just had this conversation less than one week ago
Speaker 2: with someone where the question was what is a tutsi roll?
Speaker 2: And he was like, it's taffy and I was like,
Speaker 2: don't just say that. We know what taffy is and
Speaker 2: that's not But then we googled it and it was like,
Speaker 2: it's a chocolate flavored taffy and he was very triumphant,
Speaker 2: and I was like, that's not you know, that's cheating
Speaker 2: and you know that's not fair. It's just not true.
Speaker 2: It's not true, not true.
Speaker 3: I would almost put a totsy roll in a root
Speaker 3: beer category or something.
Speaker 2: Oh, I'm so what I that's better. It's almost it's
Speaker 2: almost like more almost like a caramel almost, right.
Speaker 3: I feel like there's I mean maybe a suggestion of
Speaker 3: chocolate that it's drown just the.
Speaker 2: Fact that it's brown. That's it. There's not there's nothing.
Speaker 2: I want some chocolate. Get me a ttzy roll, hmm
Speaker 2: deep dark. I'm gonna melt this tootsy roll and put
Speaker 2: it on top of my eyes. No, none of those things.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, that idea is so disgusting. Also, mixing
Speaker 3: tootsy rolls into like a ch chocolate chip cookie, imagine, because.
Speaker 2: It's not toffee either. It's certainly not toffee either.
Speaker 3: And I feel like if I was blindfolded and someone
Speaker 3: put and I had never had it totsi roll before,
Speaker 3: and they put it in my mouth, I wouldn't be like, oh,
Speaker 3: I'm eating something related to chocolate right now.
Speaker 2: No, No, it would be a like a It's like
Speaker 2: a nondescript candy in a bowl, like a hard candies
Speaker 2: in the middle, and you're sort of like, what is
Speaker 2: this taste?
Speaker 3: I don't know, right, it's a nice chew.
Speaker 2: It's a nice chew.
Speaker 3: I like a chew. But yeah, as far as chocolate goes,
Speaker 3: it's crazy to me that totsi roll is still in business. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm actually I'm actually happy about that.
Speaker 2: I kind of like it's like an old fashioned I'm
Speaker 2: amazed that it is.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean it's like, uh, it has no reason
Speaker 3: to still be around. It's just not a cool candy
Speaker 3: in what in any.
Speaker 2: Way like necho wafers.
Speaker 3: I mean, now that should be shut down.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can't believe nobody ever liked that, even when
Speaker 2: they were kids.
Speaker 3: No, it's I have I've said it before, I'll say
Speaker 3: it again. It's the taste of mother's purse. Yes, that's
Speaker 3: my mom would have those at the bottom.
Speaker 2: Of her purse. I hated the flavor, The textures horrible.
Speaker 2: How it's like a powder in a compact kind of like.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's almost like a gas. You know, it's not
Speaker 3: it's impossible to say what form that actually is. It's
Speaker 3: not a liquid, it's not a powder, it's not a solid.
Speaker 3: It's its own scientific category.
Speaker 2: They're still they persist.
Speaker 3: There's someone likes them. And the chocolate one of that
Speaker 3: that is the worst flavor in the package. I do
Speaker 3: like how they look.
Speaker 2: That's what draws me in every time. They're beautiful, the colors,
Speaker 2: they're stylish, they're stylish, They're like timeless. Absolutely, I feel
Speaker 2: like they haven't changed the look for as long as
Speaker 2: they've been around. Is got to want to go out
Speaker 2: of business? Do They're they're testing. They're sort of like,
Speaker 2: we're not going to do anything. Let's see if American
Speaker 2: notices and America is like, we'll continue to support you.
Speaker 2: I don't know why. It's crazy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't even know where I would buy a
Speaker 3: neck away for at this point, and I'm glad.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a lot of actual there's a lot of
Speaker 2: candy like that that I'm like, are those still around?
Speaker 2: And then they are? But I don't know where you
Speaker 2: go now for like a fifth Avenue or an O
Speaker 2: Henry fifth Avenue?
Speaker 3: I think is that is gone?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 3: I used to love Avenue. I felt that I saw it.
Speaker 3: She merely collapsed.
Speaker 2: That was one of my childhood favorites.
Speaker 3: It was a lot of fun too, and I remember
Speaker 3: them having good commercials.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it was.
Speaker 3: I thought it was better than Butterfinger.
Speaker 2: I thought it was superior Butterfinger as well. It had
Speaker 2: more of a peanut butter flavor and the chocolate on
Speaker 2: the outside. I believe this is like a darker chalk let.
Speaker 3: It was more sophisticated. Let's be on.
Speaker 2: I can't accept that it's gone. Really of not having
Speaker 2: Oh wow, okay score. These are ones that used to
Speaker 2: be able to see at a seven to eleven, and
Speaker 2: I feel like now you'd have to. I feel like
Speaker 2: they're still around. You just have to go and find them.
Speaker 3: But I don't know where, right Mars, which is now
Speaker 3: just a Snicker's almond which is.
Speaker 2: Is it really the same thing?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's basically this. I think that they decided Mars
Speaker 3: shouldn't exist anymore. And I loved the Mars package.
Speaker 2: Yeah, me too.
Speaker 3: A lot of things that have just mistakes are constantly
Speaker 3: being made on a links.
Speaker 4: The Fifth Avenue bars are still available. Oh my god,
Speaker 4: it's back on hersheyland dot com.
Speaker 3: I don't know hershey Land.
Speaker 4: I don't know why, but something makes me trust a
Speaker 4: website named hershey Yeah.
Speaker 3: That's my news source. That's my number one news source.
Speaker 3: They must have brought it back because I remember being
Speaker 3: heartbroken for years. Fifth Avenue.
Speaker 2: I'm sure it's horrible now it's a pet cemetery situation.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you can't revive that.
Speaker 3: No, no, no, it's disgusting. Now I have to assume.
Speaker 3: I feel like, uh, and I could be wrong about this,
Speaker 3: So people have to do. You have to do your
Speaker 3: own research when you hear something on a podcast, of course,
Speaker 3: but I feel like a lot of Hershey candies are
Speaker 3: now Like I remember reading an article that they can
Speaker 3: have to be described as chocolate tea rather than chocolate. Yeah,
Speaker 3: because they don't use chocolate ingredients.
Speaker 2: I think that that tracks because I think a lot
Speaker 2: of things like that we consumed as like, oh, this
Speaker 2: is chocolate. I found out later like my line all
Speaker 2: my cat when he was a kitten, he jumped into
Speaker 2: a sheet cake that I had made, a Duncan heins
Speaker 2: c It was very cute and like he was like
Speaker 2: oh and like had like chocolate. But I had never
Speaker 2: had a cat before, so I called like Cat poison
Speaker 2: Control and I was like, he's guys covered in like chocolate.
Speaker 2: And they're like what, ma'am, what is the nature of emergency?
Speaker 2: They're like, man, what is the nature of the chocolate?
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, it's like a Duncan hines
Speaker 2: like cake. And then there was like a pause and
Speaker 2: they were like that has such low levels of actual
Speaker 2: chocolate that there is no danger of him at all
Speaker 2: having like you know, they're not like supposed to eat chcolate,
Speaker 2: but like that kind of thing where it's then you
Speaker 2: look at the packaging and it says like a chocolate
Speaker 2: experience or like inspired by real.
Speaker 3: Chocolates, disturbed by someone eating a chocolate bar. Yes, something
Speaker 3: like that. Wow, they really burned Duncan Hines there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, hmm.
Speaker 3: I was thinking about buying Duncan Hines recently because I
Speaker 3: wanted to put it on a gram cracker, the frosting,
Speaker 3: the chocolate frosting. Have you ever had chocolate frosting on
Speaker 3: a gram cracker?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 2: And that sounds incredible, unbelievable.
Speaker 3: Oh, and you put it in a tupperware and it
Speaker 3: gets just slightly soft on alice?
Speaker 2: Have you had this.
Speaker 3: I'm bringing a lot of new ideas to this podcast.
Speaker 2: I ever heard this, and I'm one hundred percent going
Speaker 2: to try And I bet that would look You could
Speaker 2: make it look.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can make it look like a nice little
Speaker 3: thing like it always came out of a classic lunchbox
Speaker 3: or something. But I think I've only ever had it
Speaker 3: with frosting that was made at home, like my mom.
Speaker 3: So I don't know if Duncan hines would.
Speaker 2: I do frosting. I have no complaints about that.
Speaker 3: So yeah, maybe I need to get into it because
Speaker 3: that's a nice, easy treat that I recommend to everyone.
Speaker 3: And I both learned something. It's incredible.
Speaker 2: It's great because I wouldn't eat a gram cracker otherwise.
Speaker 3: Interesting.
Speaker 2: I love a gram cracker just by itself solo.
Speaker 3: Well, I'm not.
Speaker 2: I don't find myself just sitting at home eating a
Speaker 2: gram cracker.
Speaker 3: I just mean it is small, more delicious.
Speaker 2: It's got to be accompanied by a dessert thing. To me,
Speaker 2: just by itself, I don't really.
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, I don't think I would enjoy it. If I,
Speaker 3: for whatever reason, something went wrong and I was just
Speaker 3: eating a gram cracker, I think I would enjoy myself.
Speaker 3: But what is happening when I'm just eating a gram cracker?
Speaker 3: That's like you've given that by a preschool teacher exactly.
Speaker 2: I think of it accompanied with orange juice, which is
Speaker 2: like childhood like snack things exactly. But it's not a cookie.
Speaker 2: It's not a cracker, yeah, but it is.
Speaker 3: I think it was initially made as a health product.
Speaker 3: Really again, I'm saying things that I'm learning, so but
Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure Graham Crackers, like in the eighteen hundred some.
Speaker 3: You know, you're right. I think Graham.
Speaker 2: I think there is some crazy backstory about the Graham
Speaker 2: Cracker and mister oh no, I know what it is.
Speaker 2: The town where I went to college, Sylvester Graham was there,
Speaker 2: and I believe he invented the Grammaster. I think he
Speaker 2: was the Grandmaster. That could be totally wrong, but that
Speaker 2: just came back to me. I don't know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it feels like one of those like a thing
Speaker 3: that would come up in like a like an almost
Speaker 3: cult community like Oneida. Is that what those things are like?
Speaker 3: I feel like one of these like utopian societies came
Speaker 3: up with a gram Cracker. Then they were all having
Speaker 3: sex with each other.
Speaker 2: It's just like the Kellogg's story or whatever, like corn
Speaker 2: flakes has I'm just gonna say it's in my mind
Speaker 2: because it's not accurate, and then we could look at
Speaker 2: but it's like corn flakes were invented so that people
Speaker 2: would be celibate. But there is something there is I
Speaker 2: mean that works actually that makes sense. There is some
Speaker 2: backstory about corn flakes where it was like originally a
Speaker 2: product for a religious group that was like sustenance, and
Speaker 2: then we've forgotten about its origins. But then it's like
Speaker 2: if you look it was it was tied to some
Speaker 2: sort of cult.
Speaker 3: Yeah, plain cornflake is the food of someone that is
Speaker 3: not having sex.
Speaker 2: Yes, exactly. It's sort of a monkst meal, right, yeah,
Speaker 2: horrible cereal.
Speaker 3: Oh but I guess it goes on top of a
Speaker 3: casserole or something. Time to play a game. I need
Speaker 3: a number between one and ten from you.
Speaker 2: Seven.
Speaker 3: Okay, I have to do some like calculate. Okay, while
Speaker 3: I'm doing this, you can promote, recommend, do whatever you
Speaker 3: want with the microphone.
Speaker 2: Aback. I'm going to promote and say that I have
Speaker 2: a book that came out this week which is called
Speaker 2: How to Be Sane, And it is a very silly,
Speaker 2: absurdist comedy prose book. And it tells you it's written
Speaker 2: by this woman named doctor Teresa Loan, who says that
Speaker 2: she's a therapist and it's her self help book. But
Speaker 2: as you read it, you realize that she's just batshit
Speaker 2: And that's the book. So get it wherever books are sold.
Speaker 2: And I hope you have a law.
Speaker 3: Beautiful. I'm so excited about the book.
Speaker 2: Oh good. I hope you read it, and I hope
Speaker 2: it makes you chuckle.
Speaker 3: How long did it take to write all told?
Speaker 2: Maybe about a year? I mean, is doing other stuff too,
Speaker 2: I'm like, come back with maybe maybe a year total.
Speaker 3: It sounds like such a fun thing.
Speaker 2: I think you. I think for a lot of creative,
Speaker 2: funny people, you would enjoy doing that because you just
Speaker 2: get to sit down and just be a lunatic and
Speaker 2: then nobody is like, actually, no, we can't do that,
Speaker 2: and you're sort of like, I guess I'm just gonna
Speaker 2: do this until the end of the book.
Speaker 3: Okay, Right, and it's not there's no worrying about budget
Speaker 3: or anything. It's just anything gonna happen here.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Well, let's play the game.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 3: I feel like I've recommended enough stuff on this podcast.
Speaker 3: I don't have to recommend anything. Get a gram crack
Speaker 3: or enough frosting. This is how we play gift Master.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna name three gifts, three things you can give away. Okay,
Speaker 3: then I'm gonna name three celebrities. You're gonna tell me
Speaker 3: which celebrity you would give which gift and why fun?
Speaker 3: Does that make perfect sense?
Speaker 2: It makes perfect sense.
Speaker 3: Okay. The three gifts you're giving away today are number
Speaker 3: one a high performance blender, so you know they charge
Speaker 3: a lot for the I feel like you can buy
Speaker 3: a blender for nine hundred dollars at this point. Number
Speaker 3: two an abundance, so just you know this, they'll have
Speaker 3: an abundance in their life, okay. And number three is
Speaker 3: a box of assorted dates, which I recently saw kind
Speaker 3: of a popular gift. Okay, you'll be giving them to
Speaker 3: Christian Bale, Ru Paul and Lily Rose Depp.
Speaker 2: Okay, coming, Okay, so you can I just repeat back
Speaker 2: to you of course. Okay. So blender, high performance, high performance,
Speaker 2: high end, high performance, box full of dates and abundance,
Speaker 2: and Lily Rose Depp, Christian Bale, and Rue Paul.
Speaker 3: Yes, what if that was the end of the game.
Speaker 3: I just needed you to remember.
Speaker 2: I'm going to say, wow, my gut came in strong
Speaker 2: with abundance for Lily Rose Depp. Interesting because I feel
Speaker 2: I watched that very bad show that.
Speaker 3: She was on the Idol, the Idol.
Speaker 2: And the was very bad and kind of an embarrassment,
Speaker 2: and certainly I feel like in her personal life, there's
Speaker 2: been a lot of drama and she with her dad
Speaker 2: and all that, right, and I on this show was like,
Speaker 2: she's a I think she's just a good actor in
Speaker 2: the way, and I'm kind of rooting for her. So
Speaker 2: I'm wishing her abundance so that she can kind of
Speaker 2: emerge from this weird period. And I don't know, Triumph,
Speaker 2: I want her to succeed.
Speaker 3: She's going to She's okay, good, She's absolutely going on
Speaker 3: to Christian Bale.
Speaker 2: Obviously, I'm going to give him the blender because I
Speaker 2: feel like he's always transforming for someone else. He's got
Speaker 2: to transform. Maybe that'll help make it easier for him
Speaker 2: or his loved ones to have to like support him
Speaker 2: because he's gonna I don't know what he's going to
Speaker 2: change into X but perfect.
Speaker 3: He's always on some diet.
Speaker 2: He's always on some diet, changing his body radically for
Speaker 2: a role, and no one asked him to no, And
Speaker 2: then I guess that leaves RuPaul with a box of dates.
Speaker 2: I think I would appreciate that also because Rue Paul
Speaker 2: loves a pun and like I feel like on Drag Race,
Speaker 2: you know, it's all about the puns, and I feel
Speaker 2: like there could be something about like a box of dates,
Speaker 2: like I haven't had this many dates in my house
Speaker 2: since you finished that one.
Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, I think that's perfect. These are all perfect answers.
Speaker 2: Oh, thank you.
Speaker 3: And you're saying that about Christian Bale reminds me that
Speaker 3: I recently learned that Woquin Phoenix was trying to lose
Speaker 3: weight for the Joker movie and ate an apple a
Speaker 3: day for like six months.
Speaker 2: That's all the end. So what are people doing? It
Speaker 2: is that that's that's not a diet, the apple diet.
Speaker 3: There are other things you can have one a day.
Speaker 3: I'm having like a can of tunas. Yeah, that's so weird.
Speaker 3: I mean because the Joker was like a little looney.
Speaker 3: He was like what would he eat? I don't know,
Speaker 3: And again, who knows if that's true. I feel like
Speaker 3: I'm saying a lot of things today.
Speaker 2: I definitely did. I definitely said I started talking about
Speaker 2: like cults and religious beliefs linked to cornflakes. I don't
Speaker 2: really don't. I'm really digging deep there and I don't
Speaker 2: know if it's real.
Speaker 3: Well, everyone wins. You did an excellent job, and I
Speaker 3: have no complaints. This is the final segment of the podcast.
Speaker 3: It's called I Said No Emails. People write into I
Speaker 3: Said No gifts at gmail dot com. Questions galore. They're
Speaker 3: asking all kinds of things. Hopefully a lot of the
Speaker 3: time we have to tell them what type of gift
Speaker 3: to buy? Whatever? Will you read one with me?
Speaker 2: Oh, I'd love to.
Speaker 3: Okay, this is dearest Bridger and unnecessarily rude guest. Okay,
Speaker 3: perfect for you. I have been invited to the boss's
Speaker 3: house for Christmas gathering, and I am at a loss
Speaker 3: as to what to bring as a gift. I was
Speaker 3: always taught that you should never show up to a
Speaker 3: party empty handed, so the need to bring something is
Speaker 3: overwhelming me. For some backstory, I started a new job
Speaker 3: in August at an insurance company, having absolutely no prior
Speaker 3: experience whatsoever. I am very grateful for the position, but
Speaker 3: am somewhat uncomfortable with the invitation to said fancy party
Speaker 3: because this guy has more money than God. Oh interesting,
Speaker 3: mister insurance. Other than the obvious bottle of wine or
Speaker 3: box of chocolates, what can I bring that says thanks
Speaker 3: for the invite and the job without saying I'm paid
Speaker 3: too much? But also not enough. Oh the layers, Any
Speaker 3: and all advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for
Speaker 3: the explosion whatever if that was in the background. Yours forever, Jamie. Okay,
Speaker 3: so the first thing we should say is I think
Speaker 3: this episode comes out December twenty seventh. Okay, so Jamie's
Speaker 3: probably now out of a job. Sorry, a little too late,
Speaker 3: too little, too late from Bridgie.
Speaker 2: Jamie, what did you bring? However, a little late call
Speaker 2: in we need to know.
Speaker 3: But let's say maybe now Jamie has a full year
Speaker 3: till the full year till the next party, we could
Speaker 3: give him some hints as to what you buy for
Speaker 3: someone who you know has made up more money than
Speaker 3: God on insurance.
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 3: What if we don't know anything about this boss other
Speaker 3: than the I guess they found Jamie in a gutter.
Speaker 2: Yes, and the the the power dynamic is coming through
Speaker 2: very strong. Oh like I'm going to this very fancy party,
Speaker 2: and that this guy that the boss seems just towering
Speaker 2: over him. Right, But I was disappointed when he said
Speaker 2: like aside from the obvious bottle of wine, or because
Speaker 2: my first instinct would be like a nice food product
Speaker 2: or something, oh right, like a nice and elegant, like
Speaker 2: if there's like a local like an Italy or something
Speaker 2: like that, like a or a small place that makes
Speaker 2: like special cookies or something like that, like a bag
Speaker 2: of wet pasta, like a bit like a very heavy
Speaker 2: wet bag of cold pasta slathered in.
Speaker 3: No, I think that that's not a bad idea. I'm obviously.
Speaker 3: I mean, you don't want to bring too unique of
Speaker 3: a gift to this thing. Then you're standing out. You're
Speaker 3: putting your neck out there for the boss to chop.
Speaker 3: You want to bring something maybe that isn't wine or chocolates,
Speaker 3: but is a food thing.
Speaker 2: Right, because I feel like that's also like too personal.
Speaker 2: Is putting your neck out as you say, too personal?
Speaker 2: Like for a second, I was like an ornament and
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, that's so embarrassing. Like no, then
Speaker 2: they like put what they're gonna put it on their
Speaker 2: personal tree from there to think about you. No, that's
Speaker 2: too personal.
Speaker 3: Yeah, then the boss is like, does Jamie have a
Speaker 3: crush on me? It's Jamie like gunning for my job.
Speaker 3: And then the other thing we have to think about
Speaker 3: is that Jamie is complaining about their salary too much
Speaker 3: and also not enough. It's a Goldilocks.
Speaker 2: The too much part at the beginning is really interesting
Speaker 2: to me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, what is the salary here, Jamie. I mean, if
Speaker 3: you're gonna, you know, vaguely hint at your money, send
Speaker 3: us the numbers.
Speaker 2: Just spit it out.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we want to know. I want to know what
Speaker 3: people are the numbers.
Speaker 2: I got to run some numbers here and figure out
Speaker 2: what's going on.
Speaker 3: I can't answer this question unless I know your year's salary.
Speaker 3: Oh well, yeah, I think a nice little food gift
Speaker 3: or well, actually I was going to say make something home,
Speaker 3: but no, don't do that for your boss now.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 3: That then it's like the boss is gonna throw it away. Yes,
Speaker 3: they're gonna think. I don't know Jamie well enough to
Speaker 3: know what his or her or their kitchen is. It
Speaker 3: could be filthy, covered in cat hair or something. So
Speaker 3: don't make it at home, Jamie. Buy, as we've said
Speaker 3: over and over, an ice cream cake shaped like a Turkey's.
Speaker 2: You cannot lose with that. Show up with that.
Speaker 3: Everyone will be screaming. It'll overshadow whatever whatever dessert the
Speaker 3: boss has thought of, and you'll be the star of
Speaker 3: the party or fired promoted all kinds of things gonna happen.
Speaker 2: It'll spice things up at work, that's for sure.
Speaker 3: Well, we answered Jamie's question more than perfectly and right
Speaker 3: on time. Jamie can't complain. You know, it's not my fault.
Speaker 3: You know, I get around to things when I get
Speaker 3: around to them, and you've just been dragged into a
Speaker 3: no choice of your own. I've had such a wonderful time.
Speaker 2: With you, Grace. I just loved it.
Speaker 3: I have this beautiful butter which I'll probably chop up
Speaker 3: and put into a cookie at some point, and yeah,
Speaker 3: I'll leave it in the cupboard so it's soft. Although actually,
Speaker 3: how am I going to measure this?
Speaker 2: Does that tell you how much?
Speaker 3: How many ounces it is or something?
Speaker 2: How much each feather?
Speaker 3: Maybe tick a feather is a teaspoon. Wonderful time with you.
Speaker 3: I'm so glad to finally meet you.
Speaker 2: Likewise, you were.
Speaker 3: Not a disappointment, and you could have easily been.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, that's true.
Speaker 3: Thank you so much for being here and listener, go
Speaker 3: buy Emily's book and listener. It's the end of the podcast.
Speaker 3: It's the end of the year. Everything's coming to a
Speaker 3: screeching halt. You've got to figure it out. You've got
Speaker 3: a few minutes, the ball's gonna drop. Who knows what time?
Speaker 3: Turn on Dick.
Speaker 2: Clark or whoever. Well, it's certainly not Dick Clark. Impressive
Speaker 2: if you can, because if you're seeing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you've got a special ability A The podcast is over.
Speaker 3: Let's fly into a new year with all of our love.
Speaker 3: I love you, goodbye, I said, no gifts is ant
Speaker 3: exactly right production. It's produced by our dear friend Analise Nilson,
Speaker 3: and it's beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. And we couldn't
Speaker 3: do it without our guest booker, Patrick Kottner. The theme song,
Speaker 3: of course, could only come from miracle worker Amy Man.
Speaker 3: You must follow the show on Instagram. At I said
Speaker 3: no gifts. I don't want to hear any excuses. That's
Speaker 3: where you get to see pictures of all these gorgeous
Speaker 3: gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see pictures
Speaker 3: of the gifts.
Speaker 1: But I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear.
Speaker 2: But you're I guess to my home.
Speaker 1: You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no guests,
Speaker 1: your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff,
Speaker 1: So how do you dare to surbey me