Speaker 1: Hey, viewers, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is an explicit podcast about
Speaker 1: queer sex, filter dirty words, and unfiltered descriptions of sexual activities.
Speaker 1: If hearing about orgies, anonymous sex, kink, fetish, and more
Speaker 1: offends your sensibilities, you might want to skip this Viewer
Speaker 1: discretion is advised. It's definitely not for kids. Hi. Everyone,
Speaker 1: today's episode is all about sex work, which is illegal
Speaker 1: in most of the United States, and because of this criminalization,
Speaker 1: sex workers face discrimination in nearly every aspect of our society.
Speaker 1: Sniffy's Chris Xavier and I don't agree with this state
Speaker 1: of affairs, and that's why we're doing this episode to
Speaker 1: help destigmatize sex work. But because sex work is illegal,
Speaker 1: we want to make it clear that this show is
Speaker 1: for entertainment purposes only, and we are not officially recommending
Speaker 1: that anyone follow the advice offered in this episode. Sex
Speaker 1: work isn't a profession to enter into lightly, and hiring
Speaker 1: sex workers is also legal in most of the US,
Speaker 1: so please be aware of this while listening.
Speaker 2: Okay, game Cruising Combession time. Do you remember learning about
Speaker 2: paying for sex or being paid for sex?
Speaker 1: I do, so I grew up in Florida, and there
Speaker 1: was a street called Obt Orange Blossom Trail, Okay, And
Speaker 1: every time we drove by it at night, my mom
Speaker 1: would be like, that's that's where the whoors work. I
Speaker 1: grew up Catholic. Her word's not mine, her word's not mine,
Speaker 1: and so I always had a very like stigmatized understanding
Speaker 1: of sex work. And then later when I moved to
Speaker 1: New York, one of my very first jobs in the
Speaker 1: city was actually editing for a porn company, and I
Speaker 1: had never thought of porn performers as sex workers either,
Speaker 1: But as I started making friends in the industry, a
Speaker 1: lot of folks identify as sex workers, whether they just
Speaker 1: film porn, whether they were escorts, performers, OnlyFans, content creators,
Speaker 1: which started happening shortly after I started working in the industry.
Speaker 1: So I think I have a much broader understanding of
Speaker 1: sex work now, and working to get rid of that
Speaker 1: stigma that I was raised with was also something that
Speaker 1: I think I had to work with personally, because I
Speaker 1: have had lovers and friends where sex workers have gone
Speaker 1: on dates with folks or sex workers, and I think
Speaker 1: they experience of hesitancy telling me about their work. Yes,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, you don't have to know. I'm not
Speaker 1: a twelve year old Catholic anymore.
Speaker 2: We're good, We're good.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So it's been a learning experience. I'm lucky that
Speaker 1: I've had people teach me. How about you, what's your
Speaker 1: experience been with sex work?
Speaker 2: Oh gosh, So I did sex work for about ten years.
Speaker 2: Oh wow. It started when I was about fourteen or fifteen.
Speaker 2: I was homeless and it was in means of survival
Speaker 2: im Portland, where I grew up. There was a lot
Speaker 2: of queer youth who were homeless and we sort of
Speaker 2: all banded together and my first night out with them,
Speaker 2: they were like, let's go to this corner. This is
Speaker 2: where we get our johns. And I was like, not
Speaker 2: really sure what was going on. The sky pulls up
Speaker 2: in a BMW. All my friends are like running to
Speaker 2: the car and he and I'm like standing in the
Speaker 2: background sort of like what is happening? And he pointed
Speaker 2: at me and I was like what what you want me?
Speaker 2: And then yeah, that was sort of how it started.
Speaker 2: And over the years like it, you know, I started
Speaker 2: doing Craigslist and rim Boy and Ritman, and I really
Speaker 2: leaned into being an escort. A lot of my clients
Speaker 2: were not sex based. You know, at the time, I
Speaker 2: spoke for languages, I had a valid passport, I look
Speaker 2: good in a tux. So I was doing lots of dinners,
Speaker 2: lots of gallas, lots of like boyfriend experiences, and I
Speaker 2: made a lot of money.
Speaker 1: Oh sure you did, babe, I'm sure you did.
Speaker 2: And I spent it on clothes. Yes, yes, well that's
Speaker 2: what's funny.
Speaker 1: You know, so many sex workers I've spoken to are like,
Speaker 1: sex is part of the job, but it's surprisingly not
Speaker 1: as common as you might think. Some folks want to
Speaker 1: have a conversation, yes, some folks need companies, some folks
Speaker 1: want the boyfriend experience.
Speaker 2: Yes.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it's very very interesting broad spectrum of work.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's interesting now now that I like, go
Speaker 2: go dance, like some people would like say that that
Speaker 2: is sex work, and like, to some extent it kind
Speaker 2: of is because I am sort of like offering my
Speaker 2: body in this thing in exchange for money. I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think that the culture around sex
Speaker 2: work has really changed, and I think it's like broadened
Speaker 2: a little bit in terms of like instead of just
Speaker 2: being like a porn performer or someone who you know
Speaker 2: has sex for money. It has gotten a lot broader.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And there's so many ways to exchange sex for money,
Speaker 1: whether you're doing it for survival, whether you're doing it
Speaker 1: to just try it out. Yes, And I think removing
Speaker 1: that stigma makes it safer for everybody. Yes. And it
Speaker 1: also acknowledges that, like all work can be kind of exploitative.
Speaker 2: And you, oh my god, right, I worked in corporate
Speaker 2: America and baby, I was exploited, working sixty hour weeks
Speaker 2: and making less than forty K a year. Tell me
Speaker 2: how that's right, Like.
Speaker 1: America, get it together, Get it together, America capitalism. Man,
Speaker 1: what a perfect transition into our episode. This week, Chris
Speaker 1: and I are talking to sex workers Xavier Blanco about
Speaker 1: how he made his teenage Nomi Malone fantasies a reality
Speaker 1: and the hard work it took to get there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because sex work is hard work. It is, and we're
Speaker 1: going to dive in further into that. We will also
Speaker 1: find out what newbies should know about hiring sex workers,
Speaker 1: and want to know if you are thinking of trying
Speaker 1: out one of the world's oldest professions yourself. Welcome to
Speaker 1: Stiffy's Cruising Confessions. I am Gabe Gonzales.
Speaker 2: I'm Chris Patterson Rosso. Each week we explore this sublind
Speaker 2: world of queer sex, cruising and relationship.
Speaker 1: We'll be talking to queer folks of all kinds, ask
Speaker 1: them questions, swap sex.
Speaker 2: Stories, share intimate revelations. A lot of us are discovering
Speaker 2: ourselves in cruising spaces. This happened to me at this
Speaker 2: toilet stall, in the library or the airport. I feel
Speaker 2: like everybody's gonna fuck a little harder here.
Speaker 3: Damn.
Speaker 1: So I've been like the neighborhood flat and I took
Speaker 1: pride in that. I was so afraid but yet so intrigued.
Speaker 2: And the more I gave to him, the more he
Speaker 2: could tak you're having sex on Sniffy's, you already have
Speaker 2: a moral deficit. With the background as divers as his talents,
Speaker 2: Xavier Blanco is a force to be reckoned with.
Speaker 1: Xavier's a sex worker advocate and go go dancer. Both
Speaker 1: Chris and I have had the pleasure of seeing at
Speaker 1: core venues around NYC.
Speaker 2: From his early days as a makeup artist to his
Speaker 2: current endeavors in the world of sex work. Exavier story
Speaker 2: is one of resilience and authenticity.
Speaker 1: You can catch Savior's adventures and insights on all social
Speaker 1: media platforms at NYC Dominicano, where he shares his experiences, perspectives,
Speaker 1: and some very wonderful original content.
Speaker 2: Welcome Xavier Blanco.
Speaker 1: Hi, how are you? Thanks for joining us, Thanks for
Speaker 1: having me Xavier. Let's just start off with a very
Speaker 1: basic definition. How would you define sex worker? What is
Speaker 1: being a sex worker or the word sex worker mean
Speaker 1: to you?
Speaker 3: So it means so many different things to so many
Speaker 3: different people. For me, sex worker is everything that I do,
Speaker 3: from go go dance to escorting from and OnlyFans. Some
Speaker 3: people that are go go dancers don't like being categorized
Speaker 3: as a sex worker, but I feel like when you're
Speaker 3: using your body to sell and promote yourself like it's
Speaker 3: sex work. And I love using that term because I
Speaker 3: do want to. I feel like it's not a word
Speaker 3: that should be looked at as wrong. So the more
Speaker 3: I use it, the more I promoted, the more I
Speaker 3: have like a positive stance behind it. I feel like
Speaker 3: I can, you know, go on the route of being
Speaker 3: a good thing.
Speaker 2: Can you talk to us about the first time you
Speaker 2: saw a sex worker and what that felt like. I
Speaker 2: was really young.
Speaker 3: It was actually a magazine and it was at a pharmacy.
Speaker 3: My mom was like picking up medicine and I was
Speaker 3: just like a little kid, like rummaging through the pharmacy
Speaker 3: in Long Island, and I saw a playgirl, if I'm
Speaker 3: not mistaken, so I was just like, Wow, that's hot
Speaker 3: and did not know what that was. And then from there,
Speaker 3: like sex has always been an interest of mine since
Speaker 3: I was.
Speaker 2: A little boy.
Speaker 3: I don't know why, but I really gravitated to that.
Speaker 3: And then seeing people like Pamela Anderson, Jenna Jamison Jameson,
Speaker 3: even though she's a Republican, we didn't.
Speaker 1: Have to go that far.
Speaker 3: Like when I saw a female sex workers, I just
Speaker 3: felt like they were so empowered and they felt so
Speaker 3: secure and that sense of like vulnerability with security, like
Speaker 3: I really I always just wanted that. I never had
Speaker 3: that growing up. I grew up overweight, felt always like
Speaker 3: different because in my school it was like you were
Speaker 3: either black or white, and I was never either, so
Speaker 3: I just always constantly felt othered. And when I saw
Speaker 3: these individuals, they just looked super empowered and full of
Speaker 3: love and joy, like to me like that's what I
Speaker 3: came across.
Speaker 1: Save here's a question for you, but truly for both
Speaker 1: of you. What are some of your favorite experiences you've had,
Speaker 1: either dancing or in sex work, like anything positive?
Speaker 2: And oh mine.
Speaker 3: Would be with with escorting.
Speaker 2: In particular.
Speaker 3: This one specific client who when I first started working
Speaker 3: with them, I didn't know that they just had surgery.
Speaker 3: This was also in the middle of COVID and it
Speaker 3: started off like as a massage session. So at the
Speaker 3: end of the massage, he simply I was like, can
Speaker 3: I get a hug? And I'm like, yeah, totally, and
Speaker 3: he gave me like the most like warmest, most embraced
Speaker 3: hug ever. And then after it was finished, he's like thinking,
Speaker 3: He's like, I just had surgery. He's like and then
Speaker 3: he confessed that he hasn't touched somebody physically in nine months.
Speaker 2: Oh god. And it truly like it reminded me.
Speaker 3: And when I have moments like that, like, oh, this
Speaker 3: is bigger than just sex, Like what we're doing really
Speaker 3: like changes people's lives, like getting those messages from individuals
Speaker 3: in Arkansas or like actually even in India, like Hey,
Speaker 3: what you're doing is so cool. Thank you for being
Speaker 3: so open about your life. It's entertainment, but it's also
Speaker 3: give somebody a little bit of, like I don't know,
Speaker 3: like a gateway to something that they would like to experience.
Speaker 1: Like you could be someone else's Nom Malone, someone else's
Speaker 1: Pam Anderson. Right, I was gonna say Jenna Jamison, but
Speaker 1: we've already talked about Yeah, she's a republic comparison.
Speaker 2: It really is what was what would be your moment?
Speaker 2: Oh gosh, Okay. So for me, it's been a while
Speaker 2: since I've been out of like the sex work game
Speaker 2: in terms of escorting, but I do remember getting a
Speaker 2: message from someone who lived in a southern state who
Speaker 2: was recently out, like out in like he realized that
Speaker 2: he was gay and he was a bigger person, and
Speaker 2: he was like, I'm really struggling to find connection with
Speaker 2: other gay people, and I really just like I want
Speaker 2: to have the sexual experience. He'd hired this other score,
Speaker 2: but basically this person was like using him for money,
Speaker 2: you know, and praying on him and just being able
Speaker 2: to like help him walk through that process and talk
Speaker 2: to him on the phone and just like help him
Speaker 2: realize that this person is actually not good for you
Speaker 2: and they actually were just stealing your money. And then
Speaker 2: like we had a I mean that relationship lasted I
Speaker 2: don't know, six or seven years really, and I had
Speaker 2: a really traumatic thing happened when I was in Atlanta
Speaker 2: and had a boyfriend tried to commit suicide and I
Speaker 2: didn't know anyone there and he was there in school
Speaker 2: and I called him and I was like, I'm going
Speaker 2: through this thing, and he like picked me up, he
Speaker 2: bought me food, he like sat with me, and it
Speaker 2: was one of the sweetest things and one of like
Speaker 2: the greatest things that has ever happened to me. Like,
Speaker 2: you build relationships, right, Like, yeah, sex work is building
Speaker 2: a relationship with someone, and like just to know that
Speaker 2: this person who has paid me just for my time
Speaker 2: in my conversation was willing to show up for me
Speaker 2: and like one of the darkest moments of my life
Speaker 2: was really it was kind of amazing to Brock. Thank you.
Speaker 1: Oh.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 3: I like hearing stories like that because it it gives
Speaker 3: more information to like who we are, because everybody thinks
Speaker 3: that this is just like you know, you're fucking and
Speaker 3: you're doing all these other things and that's all that's happening.
Speaker 2: But there's more to this.
Speaker 3: So much more to Yeah, there's so much more to it,
Speaker 3: at least for me. I don't think people understand sex workers.
Speaker 3: Like it's really infuriating when somebody's like assumes that my
Speaker 3: job is so much fun and that's all it is,
Speaker 3: and it's like, no, Actually, that day that I had
Speaker 3: to film that scene, I felt really ugly, and I
Speaker 3: still had to film that that day that I felt bloated,
Speaker 3: I still had to take that client that day that
Speaker 3: I was really exhausted and just wanted to go to bed.
Speaker 3: I actually had to stay up for three hours and
Speaker 3: make seven hundred dollars. Great, but that took energy, well
Speaker 3: three hours, seven hundred. The math is not mathing for that,
Speaker 3: but you know what I mean. But yeah, like, and
Speaker 3: I feel like those are part of like the misconceptions.
Speaker 3: So I don't feel like I have like emotional support
Speaker 3: and then sometimes even within my own community, like I
Speaker 3: enjoy what I do, but I feel like I'm a
Speaker 3: little more vanilla and some of my like counterparts like.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I'm gonna stop you. Did you see vanilla girl,
Speaker 2: I've seen your content.
Speaker 1: Try again, well, like I get what you need as
Speaker 1: a former porn editor, let me tell you I have
Speaker 1: seen something. I have seen some things, all right, Right,
Speaker 1: so maybe my bar for Vanilla there's a little more permissive.
Speaker 3: No, you're right, yeah, Like I'm not saying like I'm
Speaker 3: an angel, but like compared to some of these other
Speaker 3: like content creators, like I like my The reason my
Speaker 3: subscribers have been my subscribers for so long and they
Speaker 3: call me out on this anytime it doesn't happen, is
Speaker 3: because of the connections that they see on camera. I
Speaker 3: am very passionate my co stars, Like I have fun
Speaker 3: with them. I pretend that they're my boyfriends in my head,
Speaker 3: and like I present every hotvan on the boyfriend I meant.
Speaker 1: To. But I need want more, really, I gotta jump
Speaker 1: on it.
Speaker 2: That's how life works. I mean, we live in New
Speaker 2: York City exactly.
Speaker 1: When it comes to clients in particular, I have talked
Speaker 1: to folks who have encountered clients who have a certain expectation, right,
Speaker 1: They're like, they want you to engage in a certain fetish,
Speaker 1: a kink, to consume the same substances they are doing.
Speaker 1: And you talked earlier, and you mentioned that you are
Speaker 1: a sober sex worker. So what's it like sort of
Speaker 1: navigating that not just with clients, but like in only
Speaker 1: fans and the content that you create.
Speaker 3: I'm very public about it, like I said, So it's
Speaker 3: on all my platforms. It's on my Twitter, is on
Speaker 3: my Instagram, is on my rent men, is on my
Speaker 3: ret mesore, It's on my Sniffies.
Speaker 2: Like my sobrieties very important to me. Number one.
Speaker 3: I love to have sex and I love to like
Speaker 3: fawn over men, but the one thing that I would
Speaker 3: never put over that is my sobriety. So I lose
Speaker 3: a lot of clients because of it, because I'm like,
Speaker 3: you're not gonna come here intoxicated, You're not gonna come
Speaker 3: here high, and I'm not gonna get high with you.
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna watch you get high.
Speaker 3: Even though I do have a fetish for guy smoking weed,
Speaker 3: but I don't do that at work. I do that
Speaker 3: in my personal life. Like they can smoke and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 3: you're getting high. That's so hot. Yeah, it brings me
Speaker 3: back to my childhood.
Speaker 1: If I like the effects, well, if they did anything,
Speaker 1: I would, Oh thank you. All right, can we bring
Speaker 1: the weed brownies?
Speaker 2: Listen? We can do the gang back now I could
Speaker 2: get DP.
Speaker 3: I was like here and like people are walking, I'm like,
Speaker 3: is the weed bron really coming?
Speaker 1: We are a very sober set and we are.
Speaker 2: And what's interesting, you know what's funny, Like when I
Speaker 2: was doing sex work, I wasn't sober, but I did
Speaker 2: sort of draw a line around that with my clients.
Speaker 2: You know, sex work is not safe work to begin with,
Speaker 2: and I'm putting myself in some some really tricky situations,
Speaker 2: sometimes flying to new cities without having to meet someone,
Speaker 2: and if we're adding that level of drugs, specifically meth,
Speaker 2: like who knows. And so I really just drew that
Speaker 2: line because sobriety comes first, just like you were saying, like,
Speaker 2: if I don't put my sobriety first, I'm gonna lose it.
Speaker 2: You know, I've been around for I'll have nine years
Speaker 2: very soon, and like I've seen it happen, the people
Speaker 2: who put anything about their sobriety, they lose it. They
Speaker 2: lose it. And I have done a lot of work
Speaker 2: to build a really beautiful life for myself and I
Speaker 2: have no desire to go back to where I was
Speaker 2: nine years ago, like none whatsoever. So whatever it takes
Speaker 2: I'm gonna do it most of the time and crying
Speaker 2: and crying, but I'm going to do it, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think it's important that you mentioned. You know,
Speaker 1: obviously there are risks and hazards involved with this line
Speaker 1: of work. But I think that so many people who
Speaker 1: aren't familiar with folks who actually are sex workers assume
Speaker 1: that that's inhumane. And I think the reality is that
Speaker 1: it's not danger inherent to sex work. It is danger
Speaker 1: that is affecting sex workers because we forced sex work
Speaker 1: into the shadows, correct. Yeah, And so it's like to
Speaker 1: add to compound the risk even more because you don't
Speaker 1: have resources, right, you don't have a union. There are
Speaker 1: very few websites where you can safely find clients. It's
Speaker 1: just like there's so many hurdles to your safety already
Speaker 1: that I can totally understand being like, oh God, I cannot.
Speaker 2: I have to try this out. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Now, when I wasn't working, she was having a whole
Speaker 2: I was having a lot of fun. I mean when
Speaker 2: I say fun, like it wasn't really actually fun, but
Speaker 2: like the moment thought it was fun. And in the moment,
Speaker 2: I absolutely thought it was fun. But it was actually
Speaker 2: a disaster.
Speaker 1: All right, Well, we are going to take a quick
Speaker 1: break and when we come back, we're going to ask
Speaker 1: Xavier to share some tips about what to do if
Speaker 1: you've decided your love.
Speaker 2: Does cost a thing.
Speaker 1: Don't go anywhere I can't.
Speaker 2: For a good time, for a good time one eight.
Speaker 4: Good times only good times, Good times only.
Speaker 2: Welcome back. That was one eight hundred good times by Jeordiana.
Speaker 1: We are here Rexavier Blanco, and he and my co
Speaker 1: host Chris have been dragging me for my Jlo jokes.
Speaker 2: I love j Loo.
Speaker 1: Thank you. She hated the joke.
Speaker 2: I actually did not hate it.
Speaker 1: It was okay. We've got a mixed crowd here, we
Speaker 1: got a mixed crowd. In our second half of this interview,
Speaker 1: we would like to talk more about practical advice for
Speaker 1: folks who are interested in hiring sex workers, getting into
Speaker 1: sex work, or leaving sex work. So what advice would
Speaker 1: you give to somebody who is thinking of entering sex work.
Speaker 2: To not do it?
Speaker 1: Okay, I mean that could be a real answer.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I recently did an interview and I was like, don't
Speaker 3: do it. I feel like a lot of people that
Speaker 3: are entering into sex work now are doing it because
Speaker 3: of the misconception that is easy money and is quick money,
Speaker 3: and it's like it's not. It's a lot of work,
Speaker 3: and if you are going to do it, do your
Speaker 3: research and understand, like what are your boundaries. One of
Speaker 3: the things, one of the tips that I got very
Speaker 3: early on when I was started to get clients was
Speaker 3: like I had all these questions like should I do this?
Speaker 2: How much it is?
Speaker 3: And my friend was like, what do you want to
Speaker 3: do and how much do you want to pay for that?
Speaker 3: Like what's your boundary? Find that boundary and don't cross
Speaker 3: it because it's not easy, Like you're gonna be thrown
Speaker 3: a lot of money to do a lot of stuff
Speaker 3: that you might not want to do. And it's okay
Speaker 3: to say no, Like you don't have to say yes
Speaker 3: to every client.
Speaker 2: You don't have to.
Speaker 3: Put yourself in situations that you don't feel comfortable in.
Speaker 3: And it gets hard. A lot of people think like, oh,
Speaker 3: you're just like rolling in dough, But it's not always
Speaker 3: like that.
Speaker 2: You you're not. No, you're not, you're not. I mean,
Speaker 2: it's a lot of work, like Zaber was saying, and
Speaker 2: like I was making the most money after I had
Speaker 2: nurtured these relationships for four to five years. Yeah, right,
Speaker 2: it's a slow vern kind of yeah. Like and like
Speaker 2: you were saying, don't say yes to everybody, not everybody
Speaker 2: deserves it, because it's funny.
Speaker 3: Because also you could make so much money early on,
Speaker 3: but then you're saying yes to all these like bad
Speaker 3: situations that burns you out and then you have to
Speaker 3: leave and now you're left with like this psychological trauma
Speaker 3: because you put yourself in situations that you actually didn't
Speaker 3: want to do. So, yeah, you gained all that money,
Speaker 3: but what was the expense of that? And how much
Speaker 3: now are you going to actually have afterwards? Also that's
Speaker 3: another thing. Do not spend all your money at once,
Speaker 3: like invest into something Like for me, my investment right
Speaker 3: now is my future, which is in school. But like,
Speaker 3: all your money doesn't have to go to Balanciaga, all
Speaker 3: your money doesn't have to go to trips to Turks
Speaker 3: and Caicos and all these things.
Speaker 2: Like you can actually use that money for your future.
Speaker 3: Like some people might be doing this for the rest
Speaker 3: of their life and that's a different situation. But if
Speaker 3: you're not, and this is just going to be a
Speaker 3: moment in time, make sure that you're thinking about the
Speaker 3: future and like.
Speaker 2: What you're going to do with that money? What does
Speaker 2: a typical day look like for you? So it varies.
Speaker 2: So that's the other thing.
Speaker 3: Like I can literally in one night make seven grand
Speaker 3: but not see a client for two weeks, So you
Speaker 3: just don't know, like what, there is no consistency in
Speaker 3: this job. And there's also a lot of people that
Speaker 3: flake depending who I'm going to see in what type
Speaker 3: of work I'm going to be doing, if I'm going
Speaker 3: to be missile is I usually like my massaging clients
Speaker 3: a lot more than my escorting clients at times because.
Speaker 2: It's just a little easier.
Speaker 3: You're literally just rubbing down a body.
Speaker 5: Yeah, prepping for a bottom is a lot and a
Speaker 5: lot of people don't realize like what and like for me,
Speaker 5: it's like if I have an accident, which jinkstock on wood,
Speaker 5: there's oh this is right.
Speaker 3: Here with a client like that's and especially if it
Speaker 3: was the first experience, like that's the experience they're going
Speaker 3: to leave with, They're probably not going to hire me again.
Speaker 3: So massaging is a lot a lot easier, But if
Speaker 3: I'm going to be escorting, I call it the boyfriend experience.
Speaker 3: Like I am going I'm doing a deep dive. I'm
Speaker 3: like making sure that my beard is trim and making
Speaker 3: sure that I smell good. I'm making sure that whatever
Speaker 3: this person enjoys. Like every all my clients like different
Speaker 3: aspects of me, so I'm like suiting up for that.
Speaker 3: Like these glasses actually make me a lot of money.
Speaker 3: A lot of my clients love to have me in
Speaker 3: these classes, which is really funny. But it's like getting
Speaker 3: the right wardrobe and like preparing myself mentally, like who
Speaker 3: what character am I playing? Which Xavier Blancos am I
Speaker 3: for this individual? Do they want me to be the
Speaker 3: hyper sexual? Do they want me to be the more submissive?
Speaker 3: Do they want me to be submissive but dominant during
Speaker 3: these times? And like it's exhausting, Like once you're done
Speaker 3: with a session, like a lot goes into it. Like
Speaker 3: for me, it's like I'm not the ala carte escort,
Speaker 3: So I'm really thinking about, like what is going to
Speaker 3: make this individual feel special by the end of it?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'm curious. So you mentioned you know that
Speaker 1: escorting is really difficult, and you've talked a lot about
Speaker 1: the sort of emotional work that goes into it and
Speaker 1: the prep. I'm curious, do you find that your work
Speaker 1: for OnlyFans is just as time consuming, even if it's
Speaker 1: like a different kind.
Speaker 3: Of it's even more time consuming. Like I give it
Speaker 3: up to just influencers and content creators in general. Like
Speaker 3: I did a like a ten second reel that took
Speaker 3: me twenty seven minutes to edit on the fucking treadmill,
Speaker 3: and I'm just like Jesus for ten seconds.
Speaker 2: And that's what only fans.
Speaker 3: Like that happens with only fans, Like you're creating these trailers,
Speaker 3: you're marketing yourself, You're following up with dms and messages,
Speaker 3: and like this person just sent me a hundred dollars,
Speaker 3: so I have to make sure I respond to this,
Speaker 3: And it's there's a lot of moving pieces, and I'm
Speaker 3: a one man show. Some of these content creators that
Speaker 3: are in the one percent and are making all these money,
Speaker 3: they have people answering back all these like dms, they
Speaker 3: have these people editing their videos and creating content for them,
Speaker 3: and I have to do that all by myself. And
Speaker 3: when you're doing it for only fans, the harder aspect
Speaker 3: of that is that it's different platforms. So my content
Speaker 3: that goes on Instagram can be the same that goes
Speaker 3: on X, and then that that goes on X can
Speaker 3: be what goes on Only Fans because then your subscribers
Speaker 3: are like, well, I might as well just be on
Speaker 3: X because you're putting posting the same things over there.
Speaker 2: So you have to really be you.
Speaker 3: Have to think out what your strategy is and what
Speaker 3: are you going to be portraying and how you're going
Speaker 3: to portray it and be consistent with it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a lot. It's a lot of work.
Speaker 1: I mean I was reading an interview with someone who
Speaker 1: was in the top one percent of Only Fans creators
Speaker 1: and they quit their full time job. The person was like,
Speaker 1: how much do you make a year? And it was
Speaker 1: a lot of money. But then he was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think I worked sixty to eighty hours a week.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I was like I don't. I mean, I've worked like
Speaker 1: maybe fifty when I've had like a couple of freelance jobscoring,
Speaker 1: But sixty to eighty hours a week. You're like filming,
Speaker 1: You're booking people to be in scenes with you, you're
Speaker 1: editing them. It's like the copy that goes with the video.
Speaker 1: It's like it really is wild. It's almost like a
Speaker 1: job and.
Speaker 2: A half, it is.
Speaker 3: And that's the reason why I say, like when people
Speaker 3: are like, oh, I want to do this, is like specifically,
Speaker 3: even with OnlyFans, I'm like, you can't delete these things
Speaker 3: that you're putting up. Like I say, like, it's kind
Speaker 3: of like you wanted to do tennis, like and then
Speaker 3: you decide to not do it anymore. Like cool, you're
Speaker 3: not doing that anymore OnlyFans. Like, once that's public, once
Speaker 3: people know that you did this, this is following you
Speaker 3: for the rest of your life. And it's a lot
Speaker 3: of work that people don't realize that goes into this,
Speaker 3: and there's a.
Speaker 2: Lot of planning to it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's very disheartening when somebody's like, yeah, I
Speaker 3: want to do this because and it's like such a
Speaker 3: fleeting thought to them. It's like, wow, you really think
Speaker 3: that I'm just like sitting around doing nothing with my
Speaker 3: listing record?
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my god.
Speaker 2: I wish I could use the unedited version.
Speaker 3: And I wish that I wasn't investing money into camera lighting,
Speaker 3: multiple yeah, all that stuff. Yeah, all that like it's money,
Speaker 3: like they don't realize it.
Speaker 2: I don't know. Let's say I'm like looking to hire
Speaker 2: a sex worker for the first time, what advice would
Speaker 2: you give to someone?
Speaker 3: Ask questions and don't feel like you're being inappropriate with
Speaker 3: asking those questions. I've gotten people asking questions and they're like,
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry with all these questions, and I'm like, no,
Speaker 3: it's totally fine, and they'll say, well, this other person
Speaker 3: I was speaking to was very upset. I'm like, well,
Speaker 3: maybe do's not the sex sex worker you're looking for
Speaker 3: that like ask the questions, like you're about to get
Speaker 3: naked with this person, You're about to be intimate with
Speaker 3: this person. If the person you're hiring does and want
Speaker 3: to respond to them, or it feels like there are
Speaker 3: too many questions and you need these questions answer, maybe
Speaker 3: that's not the sex worker for you. Like there's a
Speaker 3: plethora of us out there, which sucks for me.
Speaker 2: So if you're not, but you have something special, oh
Speaker 2: I do what you're offering. Not a lot of people
Speaker 2: are offering no at all, Like you're an experience with me.
Speaker 3: Not only are you gonna come, but you're gonna leave
Speaker 3: there feeling good about yourself, Like I I'm not into humiliation.
Speaker 3: I'm not into like making somebody feel that they're beneath me,
Speaker 3: like this is this?
Speaker 2: I enjoy this?
Speaker 3: Like there's clients that are looking for that, and I even,
Speaker 3: like I tell them from the beginning, I'm like, I'm
Speaker 3: not that person for you. I don't know how I
Speaker 3: tried that whole fin down for a while. God, you
Speaker 3: can make so much easy money, but like I can't
Speaker 3: like is it easy though, well I shouldn't say easy money.
Speaker 2: You're right, it's it's hard. Well for me, it was hard.
Speaker 3: You know, you can find a cash pick and make
Speaker 3: a lot of money off of them, but you have
Speaker 3: to be that type of person that's going to be
Speaker 3: treating them pretty shitty. And it's really funny because there's
Speaker 3: also like a limit and then if you pass that limit,
Speaker 3: they're like, oh, I'm not into this. So if you're
Speaker 3: not sad you with it, is that going to work out?
Speaker 3: So I'm like, I'm not that person. I am not
Speaker 3: dominant by any means. I can be a bossy bottom
Speaker 3: like some people like to say, but I don't think so.
Speaker 3: I don't understand why they call me a bossy bottom.
Speaker 3: I just like what I like, I'm my girl.
Speaker 1: Have you seen your contents?
Speaker 2: There's a difference.
Speaker 6: Yeah, but I'm so submissive I want to lead into
Speaker 6: that no where, So yeah, I would say ask questions,
Speaker 6: like ask questions.
Speaker 2: Don't be ashamed of what you're doing.
Speaker 3: Like some people feel like they're doing something dirty and appropriate.
Speaker 2: It's like, no, we're two consenting.
Speaker 3: Grown adults about to do something that we both should
Speaker 3: enjoy and feel safe. And and if you don't even
Speaker 3: want to feel safe in it, like that's cool, Like
Speaker 3: you can find somebody that's for that.
Speaker 2: So yeah, ask a lot of questions. What does retirement
Speaker 2: look like for you?
Speaker 3: Uh, retirement for me looks like like I will always
Speaker 3: be part of the sex work industry. I do want
Speaker 3: to become an advocate for it. I want to help
Speaker 3: other sex workers that are either up and coming or
Speaker 3: are still in the industry. But I'm currently in school.
Speaker 3: I am going to school to become an accountant. I
Speaker 3: want to get my CPA license, Like I want to
Speaker 3: have my own firm, and I I think sky's the limit,
Speaker 3: Like I've really learned in this industry, Like you actually
Speaker 3: don't have to have like tunnel vision. I know, like
Speaker 3: some of the things that I want to be doing,
Speaker 3: but it doesn't have to just be like this particular thing.
Speaker 3: So retirement for me would be somewhere with a boat
Speaker 3: in the middle of the ocean taking emails.
Speaker 2: I love that, Like literally, I.
Speaker 1: Love that your fantasy was like a boat the ocean
Speaker 1: and emails.
Speaker 5: Yeah, the last part, but like the email, well, because
Speaker 5: you know, I'm still going to be doing.
Speaker 2: Work like I want to, you know, and don't get
Speaker 2: the bad.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Literally, bots are expensive.
Speaker 3: It was like, well, like because it was Pamela Anderson
Speaker 3: Tommy Lee's video that really.
Speaker 1: Like on the films on the boat right, Yes, is that.
Speaker 3: Really solidified, like this is what I want to do
Speaker 3: and I want to fulfill that fantasy, like I want
Speaker 3: to be in the middle of that's another hundred grand
Speaker 3: just wow, oh my god, that's all right.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: In my industry, there's so many people that do get
Speaker 3: tunnel vision and don't think that they can be anything
Speaker 3: else more than just a sex worker, or that sex
Speaker 3: work only means one.
Speaker 2: Single thing, like you can do so much in it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know. I met a lot of folks when
Speaker 1: I was working editing that that did retire and did
Speaker 1: something that was vastly different, right, folks that went into
Speaker 1: public health, that went back to law school, that started
Speaker 1: working at like local clinics. And it's interesting because I
Speaker 1: really do think so many of the people that I
Speaker 1: met that were working as either escorts or porn performers
Speaker 1: taught me things about sexual health that I had never learned.
Speaker 1: Taught me about community locations, like really a fountain of knowledge,
Speaker 1: like the patients, the sort of vulnerability and the know
Speaker 1: how to be able to manage their own career in
Speaker 1: any kind of sex work. It's like you've really got
Speaker 1: to be dedicated, you've got to be knowledgeable, you've got
Speaker 1: to be on top of your stuff. And it's like
Speaker 1: that's a skill set that you can apply in any career,
Speaker 1: Like you've really built a valuable skill set interfacing with
Speaker 1: other people or working on your own behalf.
Speaker 3: When I was doing my resume recently, like sadly, like
Speaker 3: I can't put escorting on my resume or even the
Speaker 3: only fans really, but I have gained so many skills
Speaker 3: from it, Like I've learned to manage a full business,
Speaker 3: a business that pays for my rent, my bills, and
Speaker 3: my school. That's gonna like further my future and talking
Speaker 3: about sexual health. Like, I get so annoyed when people
Speaker 3: find out that I'm a sex worker and they're like, oh,
Speaker 3: STIs and all this, and I'm like, Babe, if I
Speaker 3: get an STI I'm not working.
Speaker 2: And if I'm not working, I'm not making money.
Speaker 3: So while you were at the cock taking dick, I
Speaker 3: had to be careful about my sexual adventures because if
Speaker 3: I do get something, I can't work.
Speaker 1: That's a really good point. I think a lot of
Speaker 1: the folks that I've met in sex work are getting
Speaker 1: tested more regularly every three months rather than every six months,
Speaker 1: which is the same regimen of testing for when you're
Speaker 1: on prep. And so it's so funny that people are like, oh,
Speaker 1: folks are on prep or folks who do sex workers,
Speaker 1: don't we responsible And it's like no, baby, We're like literally,
Speaker 1: it's really wild. So this has been really incredible. I'm
Speaker 1: so glad we did get to have a little fun,
Speaker 1: but also like dive a little deeper into some.
Speaker 2: Of the topics that mean a lot to you. Yeah,
Speaker 2: thank you so much for being here. I love you dearly.
Speaker 2: Where can people find you?
Speaker 3: You can find me on all social media platforms as
Speaker 3: NYC Dominicano. A little tip if you're looking to get
Speaker 3: into sex work and to be public with it, please
Speaker 3: have the same handle across the board.
Speaker 2: You want people to find you.
Speaker 3: You do not need a different one for your Instagram,
Speaker 3: your Twitter, your only fans. Don't make it hard for
Speaker 3: them to find me, so you can find me NYC Dominicano.
Speaker 1: I love it. Consistency is key, baby, that's also a
Speaker 1: great screen name. I can't believe you nabbed it. It
Speaker 1: was actually a joke because I am Dominican. I do
Speaker 1: live in New York City, but I grew up very Americanized.
Speaker 1: I grew up very feeling others.
Speaker 3: Like I said, so my friend studied as a joke, like,
Speaker 3: oh my god, you should be NYC Dominicano because I'm
Speaker 3: far from that.
Speaker 2: Like, I don't know how to dance.
Speaker 1: I love my culture, save my life, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean?
Speaker 2: Well, maybe now you're any Porto Ricano.
Speaker 1: Platforms.
Speaker 6: No.
Speaker 1: I bet j Low took that too. We love her.
Speaker 1: Good night, all right, thank you, gain Xavier. We're going
Speaker 1: to take a break and when we come back, we're
Speaker 1: playing Pump or Dump.
Speaker 2: All right, It's time to play our favorite game. Here
Speaker 2: cruising confessions, pump or dump. I love it.
Speaker 1: You all know how this works. Okay, I'm going to
Speaker 1: explain it again. But we it's not too complicated, right,
Speaker 1: We've got pump and dump. What do those things mean.
Speaker 1: Pump means we're living for it, we would come for it,
Speaker 1: we're obsessed. And dump means we will flush it away. Okay,
Speaker 1: We're not here to yuck your yum, but we are
Speaker 1: here to dump it.
Speaker 2: Correct.
Speaker 1: Okay, amazing Colin Farrell Farrell Pump, I'm pumping on. I
Speaker 1: don't know a lot about him, okay, but I know
Speaker 1: that he was also another celebrity sex tape that was released.
Speaker 1: It was good. It was short, but good, it was
Speaker 1: very good. So I will give him pump for that.
Speaker 1: I'll give him a big old pump. Yeah, he could
Speaker 1: give me one too. I still go back to that film.
Speaker 2: In a pinch.
Speaker 1: That's what I want to watch. I can't, I can't.
Speaker 2: You know what I you know I haven't seen in
Speaker 2: a while. Exactly.
Speaker 1: Let's rewatch Sex in the Cities and yes.
Speaker 2: Thank you exactly.
Speaker 1: I love that. You're sure you've got a hard drive
Speaker 1: with just Golden Girl episodes and the Colin feral.
Speaker 2: Sex tape of course, naturally.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Yeah, I just say I have a weird feeling
Speaker 1: about celebrity sex tapes because I obviously watched it as
Speaker 1: a teenager when LimeWire was a thing. Baby Love Her,
Speaker 1: the things I was downloading on LimeWire. Yeah, I feel
Speaker 1: weird looking back on that as an adult because I'm like,
Speaker 1: I don't know if this was released with this person's consent.
Speaker 2: It never was.
Speaker 1: It makes me feel really bad. It makes me feel
Speaker 1: bad thinking about it now, but I did not feel
Speaker 1: about watching it when I.
Speaker 2: Was sixteen, all right.
Speaker 1: Next up is the new Deadpool and Wolverine movie, which
Speaker 1: I'm asking you about before it has come out. It's
Speaker 1: coming out and alive. Yes, it's a pump for me. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Deadpool sexy. Hugh Jackman is sexy as Wolverine. Hugh Jackman
Speaker 1: is sexy, not as Wolverine, So pump. I'm pumping for
Speaker 1: Hugh Jackman in a sleeveless Wolverine costume. It is. And
Speaker 1: that beard that was my sexual awakening in the ANSI
Speaker 1: series as a child Harry superhero where you could see.
Speaker 2: His like forearms a beast.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, actually, Wolverine gets a pump. Yeah, but like
Speaker 1: Beast gets a pump, he gets a pump for that
Speaker 1: blue dick. You know what I'm saying. If we have
Speaker 1: any Beast players out there, I'm like, okay, you're into it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I heard his big muscles. Okay, that's light on paper.
Speaker 1: Beast is my man, and he's also a nerd. He's
Speaker 1: such a nerd. He's always like quoting, like like, yes,
Speaker 1: he's always reading things. Oh we're coming.
Speaker 2: Where are you, Beast?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Where are you?
Speaker 1: He wasn't on this list, but he is now He's
Speaker 1: a pump.
Speaker 2: Yeah for sure. Great. Next up is La grand Wolf.
Speaker 1: The Grand Wolf. I am somewhat familiar with his work.
Speaker 2: Yeah I don't know who that is.
Speaker 1: Oh really yeah, prolific, poor performer, very tall, kind of
Speaker 1: gingery hair. Okay, well I'm just really really fat. The
Speaker 1: ginger grates are comfort. Oh that's all you needed. I
Speaker 1: really I didn't even have to get No, you said ginger,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, yes, that's it, all right. So he
Speaker 1: might be sliding into your DMS after that. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: be incredible.
Speaker 2: But do you think he likes my flavor?
Speaker 1: I'm sure. I feel like he is so prolific.
Speaker 2: He likes it.
Speaker 1: He's tried every flavor of ice cream cold Stone Creamery.
Speaker 2: He is. I thought you're gonna say, Baskt and Robbins
Speaker 2: with a thirty one but no cream and the title right,
Speaker 2: of course, you're good. You're so good.
Speaker 1: I got all right. Well, that's the end of our show.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining us, and I hope
Speaker 1: you tune into the next episode. Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is
Speaker 1: a production of Outspoken podcast Network from iHeart Podcasts. It's
Speaker 1: directed by Adam Barron, produced by Stevie Williams and Cameron Femino,
Speaker 1: and executive produced by Eli Martin. Cruising Confessions is presented
Speaker 1: by Sniffy's, the ultimate map based cruising platform for gay,
Speaker 1: by and curious.
Speaker 2: People ready to cruise.
Speaker 1: Check out the map at Sniffy's dot com and follow
Speaker 1: Sniffy's on socials at Sniffy's app.
Speaker 6: Put Joe Put Put Joe put put, Joe puts up.