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Speaker 1: So I want to talk about my book Businesses Personal. Uh,

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Speaker 1: it just launched. I have written multiple books. It's my

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Speaker 1: ten book. Five have been New York Times bestsellers. And

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Speaker 1: from the very beginning, the only reason I've ever written

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Speaker 1: books is because it's something I've wanted to say. If

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Speaker 1: it was about your relationship with food that I called

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Speaker 1: that a bad relationship food noise and a good relationship

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Speaker 1: food voice. If it was about just kind of my

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Speaker 1: first round of success, A Place of Yes was a

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Speaker 1: really good book for people who were just at that

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Speaker 1: cross road. So many girls in particular have come up

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Speaker 1: to me and saying when they were at a cross roads,

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Speaker 1: that book at them through so much. So, Uh, this

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Speaker 1: is a book that came out of me because I've

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Speaker 1: never really talked about business, and I haven't talked about

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Speaker 1: my non traditional path to business and the crazy mistakes

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Speaker 1: I've made and the unpopular choices I've made and just

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Speaker 1: inside baseball things that I've gone through. Not because you

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Speaker 1: are going to have those same experiences, because you are

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Speaker 1: your own brand of non traditional business person, whether that's

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Speaker 1: at your office or uh you have an idea, or

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Speaker 1: because of this crazy time now when the world has

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Speaker 1: changed astronomically and people have It's just been shaken up.

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Speaker 1: And whether people wanted to jump or not, they have

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Speaker 1: to jump now. Whether people had that idea that they

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Speaker 1: want to execute, now the door has been closed behind

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Speaker 1: them and they have to do it. So it's an

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Speaker 1: interesting time. And I'm just I did not plan that.

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Speaker 1: I don't believe that. I don't remember when I got

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Speaker 1: the book deal, but I certainly don't know if I was.

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Speaker 1: I think I actually was wise enough to think about it.

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Speaker 1: I think I thought about the shock to the system.

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Speaker 1: This pandemic or in Ukraine is a shock to the system.

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Speaker 1: It's just everything is weird and strange. Is a new normal.

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Speaker 1: And I'm not a traditional entrepreneur, luckily for the people

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Speaker 1: that I connect with. I did not go to business school.

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Speaker 1: I never thought I would be an entrepreneur. I didn't

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Speaker 1: even know what that word meant. I didn't have any

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Speaker 1: level of success by anyone's measure until I was in

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Speaker 1: my late thirties, and I don't even I wasn't successful

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Speaker 1: in relationships. I didn't have a child, I didn't have

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Speaker 1: any money, like I wasn't successful by any metric except

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Speaker 1: for that. I was like funny and like to laugh,

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Speaker 1: which is a metric. But I mean I didn't even

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Speaker 1: have a good closet, Like I don't even mean close

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Speaker 1: in it. I had like a disorganized closet that my

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Speaker 1: dream was just to have organizers in my closet and

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Speaker 1: just like have look normal. I mean I really was

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Speaker 1: thirty eight when I peeked, so I was a late bloomer.

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Speaker 1: So anybody. Gail King put it best. She said, this

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Speaker 1: is a book for somebody who wants to start a business,

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Speaker 1: wants to get a business, wants to be in business,

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Speaker 1: wants to get a head in business. Um, so this

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Speaker 1: is a tool. Kid. So when you are faced with something,

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Speaker 1: you might say, okay, Bethany said it, you've got to

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Speaker 1: be in it to win it. What does that mean?

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Speaker 1: It means something different for everybody. But what it means

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Speaker 1: is talk is cheap. You're talking about it. You need

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Speaker 1: the perfect business plan. You've got to do that. Once

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Speaker 1: this happens, once that happens, once the other thing happens,

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Speaker 1: you know, then you'll do it. You have to be

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Speaker 1: in it to win it. It doesn't mean I'm telling

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Speaker 1: people to leave their job and their insurance and therefore, oh,

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Speaker 1: one k if they're supporting a family. It gets more

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Speaker 1: difficult as you get older and you have more responsibilities

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Speaker 1: to be courageous. Okay, you can still do it. You

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Speaker 1: can be an entrepreneur at ninety years old. And I'm

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Speaker 1: not even kidding. But if you are young and you

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Speaker 1: don't have major life responsibilities, there's no reason you shouldn't

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Speaker 1: be on the road that you want to be. This

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Speaker 1: is the time. It's not going to be later, okay.

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Speaker 1: And if you're on that road, if I want to

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Speaker 1: meet someone, I want to get married, I want everything

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Speaker 1: tied up in a perfect little box and to be

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Speaker 1: taken care of. That road is swervy to and not reliable.

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Speaker 1: So if you have something inside of you and you

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Speaker 1: want to go get something, you go get it at

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Speaker 1: any age. But certainly if you do not have major,

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Speaker 1: major life responsibilities. I mean, I can't go move to

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Speaker 1: certain countries because I have a daughter. I can't just

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Speaker 1: run off and you know, promote what I want to

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Speaker 1: promote in Australia because I have a daughter, Like I

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Speaker 1: have a partner in life, and I can't just do

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Speaker 1: what I want to do um and now I have

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Speaker 1: partners in business and philanthropy and all these other things.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I owe myself to a lot of people.

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Speaker 1: So when you don't have that, that's when you can

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Speaker 1: really go for it and hit your stride. So that's

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Speaker 1: the thing about you've got to be in it to

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Speaker 1: win it. Success is the intersection of success is the

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Speaker 1: intersection of intention and luck. Talk to so many mobiles

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Speaker 1: on my podcast. We all agree it doesn't matter how

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Speaker 1: lucky you are, you better be prepared for when that

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Speaker 1: luck shows up, that those fish are in that water.

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Speaker 1: You better have your net and a sturdy boat, and

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Speaker 1: you'd be standing there waiting to catch them. Because talking

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Speaker 1: about it and thinking that a unicorns flying through your

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Speaker 1: window and making you successful does not exist. Trust the process.

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Speaker 1: You don't need to know what you're doing. You don't

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Speaker 1: need to get out of college or leave a job

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Speaker 1: or have a side hustle to know what the point is.

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Speaker 1: You are not supposed to at any point really know

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Speaker 1: what you do. I still don't have a whole big plan.

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Speaker 1: I never have. I played check. I played chess and

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Speaker 1: know what the board is doing and have fantasy plans

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Speaker 1: and know what my brand is and what my culture

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Speaker 1: is and what my code is, and you too should

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Speaker 1: know what your what you stand for, what you want.

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Speaker 1: It will change, but you do not need to know.

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Speaker 1: You have to trust the process, and whatever job you take,

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Speaker 1: you do it the best you can. You could be

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Speaker 1: shoveling snow, you could be picking up poop, you could

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Speaker 1: be cleaning people's houses. I don't care what it is.

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Speaker 1: You do it to the best of your ability. Because

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Speaker 1: trust me, whoever you meet and whatever you do will

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Speaker 1: come in handy later. There will be lessons in those

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Speaker 1: things that you think are beneath you. And if you

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Speaker 1: think they're beneath you, you cannot do this well. You

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Speaker 1: have to do every job like it's your life. And

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Speaker 1: I've had every job and I've always treated it like

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Speaker 1: it's the most important job. Other ones no one to

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Speaker 1: hold them and went to fold them. Not everything is

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Speaker 1: a good idea. Not everything has to be pushed through.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes you have to walk away. That is important. Uh.

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Speaker 1: If you're building a team, if you work in a

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Speaker 1: corporate environment, if you have a staff at all, even

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Speaker 1: if it's a house staff, you're only as good as

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Speaker 1: your weakest link. People always say you're only as happy

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Speaker 1: as your most miserable child. Okay, So whatever is negative,

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Speaker 1: whatever is not working, whatever you're is pulling the focus

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Speaker 1: the attention. One little gnat buzzing in your ear can

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Speaker 1: druin a whole day. So whatever is not working in

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Speaker 1: your infrastructure, you've got to cut it, loose, move it

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Speaker 1: out to some other place, or fix it. Those are

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Speaker 1: your choices. Drinking a situation pretty is not going to happen. Um.

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Speaker 1: Keeping your circle tight, you just must do that. You

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Speaker 1: just can't trusts most people. It's related to uh my

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Speaker 1: rule that's never connect the dots. Don't connect too many dots.

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Speaker 1: You can network, you can talk to people, you can

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Speaker 1: have conversation. You just don't need to tell everybody everything

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Speaker 1: you've done and everyone that you know. You just don't

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Speaker 1: need to because the more you reveal, the more something

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Speaker 1: comes back. You mentioned a person that you know, they

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Speaker 1: know them too, they don't like them. Now they're judging

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Speaker 1: you based on the fact they don't like them. You

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Speaker 1: say you're doing this deal. They think you won't be

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Speaker 1: able to do the deal you're doing with them, or

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Speaker 1: they judge you for that deal, or they tell someone else,

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Speaker 1: then you don't get the deal. Is just no need

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Speaker 1: to over connect the dots. Protect The realm is your brand,

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Speaker 1: your code, your culture, what it is you do. Not

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Speaker 1: go off to the shiny objects and the other things

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Speaker 1: that are fast cash or just seem like a good

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Speaker 1: idea in the moment, or that you can't resist, because

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Speaker 1: you're always doing things that adhere to the line of

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Speaker 1: what your main main goal is. Um, fewer buckets full.

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Speaker 1: It's my mantra about stacking and just I'd rather have

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Speaker 1: fewer quality things to work on to give me a

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Speaker 1: good return on my emotional, physical, or financial investment. Then

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Speaker 1: spreading yourself so thin. It all sounds good, Then the

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Speaker 1: calendar gets clagged. You're telling people you can have plans

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Speaker 1: with them. You're doing too many things, and you've got

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Speaker 1: to get militant and strict. You've got to cut things out.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, we must discuss my plan experience. I

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Speaker 1: get on the plane on Jet Blue, first row, um,

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Speaker 1: and everybody thinks I should be flying, you know, a

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Speaker 1: first class spaceship when I go to Orlando or do

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Speaker 1: an appearance. Evidently, Oh, you don't have a private plane, right.

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Speaker 1: I don't fly a plane just to go down to Orlando.

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Speaker 1: Every time I leave my house to go to fucking

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Speaker 1: CVS and get lip. Plus, I don't take a plane,

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Speaker 1: pry the plane. So I was in the first row

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Speaker 1: of jet Blue and there were two people next to me,

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Speaker 1: thin blonde couple, tan like, look very like. They definitely

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Speaker 1: live in Florida. They live in Orlando. They were going home,

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Speaker 1: and um, they were in love. They were very, very

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Speaker 1: very much in love. There was a long delay because

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Speaker 1: there was weather and they were very much in love.

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Speaker 1: And how do I know this Because they were making

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Speaker 1: out and that's their body and it's their choice. But

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Speaker 1: there were sounds that were attached to this. And this

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Speaker 1: is where I draw the line. This was and I'm

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Speaker 1: not I never exaggerate. You'll find out. Everyone who works

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Speaker 1: for me will tell you. I do not embellish, I

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Speaker 1: do not exaggerate. I'm a very literal person. Okay, So

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Speaker 1: they're next to me and it's back and forth, and

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Speaker 1: this is what it sounds like. And it's not over

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Speaker 1: like they're not they're not like moaning, but it's exactly,

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Speaker 1: it's just it's it's because you know, I love you

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Speaker 1: so much and I love you so because the kiss

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Speaker 1: is not enough. Like even like they were making out,

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Speaker 1: there were window in middle. I wouldn't have even but

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Speaker 1: it was the noises, and I wanted to fucking grab

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Speaker 1: the goddamn vomit bag in front of me, like, like

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Speaker 1: I love, it's an exaggerated fucking you know, it's more

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Speaker 1: than a kiss. It's more than a kiss. It's just

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Speaker 1: like a slightly wet smooch, you know, but it's love,

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Speaker 1: it's lust. It's like I want to fuck you smooch, okay,

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Speaker 1: And I'm like Jesus fucking Christ. So in addition to

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Speaker 1: the smooching the man next to me, she massaged him.

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Speaker 1: At one point she gave him. He leaned forward and

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Speaker 1: she was giving him a full massage because she loves

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Speaker 1: saying she's the best partner ever, and they love each

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Speaker 1: other and they smooch, and I'm just like, of course,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, what level what level of their relationship are they?

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Speaker 1: Add like do they where are they in this journey? Okay?

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Speaker 1: I was thinking that the whole time. So then he's

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Speaker 1: and I'm not kidding, it's not singing. He's humming singing.

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Speaker 1: He's like dinging. He's doing this like in between, like

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Speaker 1: because they're so in love, they're like this like sort

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Speaker 1: of rock and roll ee kind of couple and he's

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Speaker 1: going like this, he's going mmmmmmm, but like getting into it,

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Speaker 1: you know, like John Mayory, like mmmmm. And I'm thinking,

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Speaker 1: I don't what am I gonna do it? Like what

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Speaker 1: am I gonna do? I have to be Buddhist, I

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Speaker 1: have to be a monk, like what what am I

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Speaker 1: going to do? Because sometimes it would go on longer

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Speaker 1: and then it would stop and I'd be like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: we're safe now, and it would go on longer and

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Speaker 1: it would stop, and it was. It was a lot,

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Speaker 1: and I was happy for them to be so in love.

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Speaker 1: And I did, of course think about my relationship and

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Speaker 1: that we are not like slurp smooching in on the

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Speaker 1: plane and like I might give Paul a kiss, but

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Speaker 1: I would never be something that was audible. And I

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Speaker 1: had and I talked to no one ever because I

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Speaker 1: don't want to engage in conversation, but I had to

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Speaker 1: say when we were landing, like we were like it

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Speaker 1: was about to be deep when the thing goes off

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Speaker 1: and you can get your fucking bags amazing race. So

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Speaker 1: I said, how long have you guys been together? Because

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Speaker 1: I needed to hear the answer to like the slurping stage.

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Speaker 1: And he said six to six eight months. I was

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Speaker 1: like hm, and I was like, oh great, yeah, And

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Speaker 1: I was like, exactly, exactly, the fucking soul hasn't been

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Speaker 1: ripped out of his relationship. Like it's not avoid dead

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Speaker 1: love that's solid and that you enjoy, but where you've

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Speaker 1: been through like full bickering arguments and like logistical debates

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Speaker 1: and differences in personality and differences in sleeping styles and

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Speaker 1: fucking who wants to eat at this time? And did

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Speaker 1: your partner need to meet in a potato at every

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Speaker 1: meal where you like to eat him homeless and snacks?

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Speaker 1: Or did your partner like make noises at night or

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Speaker 1: are they super messy and you're super organized or do

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Speaker 1: they every fucking night? Ask you what do you? So?

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Speaker 1: I was like, thank fucking god, six to eight months.

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Speaker 1: It's exactly what I needed to hear for the slurping

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Speaker 1: smooching stage. Mind you, I was never at the slurping

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Speaker 1: smooching stage. Okay, all along the same lines, closed the

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Speaker 1: slurping chapter and relationship chapter. This happened. I was in

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Speaker 1: the first seat, and I think I wanted to go

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Speaker 1: get a snack or something, and I was getting on

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Speaker 1: the plane. And I walked onto the plane and the

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Speaker 1: gentleman and it wasn't full yet the plane, if vally

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Speaker 1: had loaded, my zone had loaded, but my row I think,

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Speaker 1: had five seats and three people sitting in them. So

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Speaker 1: I showed up to two out of the five people

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Speaker 1: in that row weren't there yet. So I walked directly

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Speaker 1: onto the plane. You know, you entered the door and

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Speaker 1: the man who later was he was a very nice man,

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Speaker 1: and I he was actually a wonderful flight attendant. And

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Speaker 1: what they fucking don't go through. I put me in

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Speaker 1: an institution. But this is what they This is exactly

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Speaker 1: precisely the interaction that ensued. I walk on. I have

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Speaker 1: an enormal sized carry on suitcase. The first thing, like

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Speaker 1: he's waiting to you're gonna have to check that. You're

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Speaker 1: gonna have to say. I didn't even get on to

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Speaker 1: no four plane, no fucking lube, nothing, just walked right

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Speaker 1: into the plane. There's only like twenty five people on

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Speaker 1: the plane. My fucking zone entered. But like I, it's

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Speaker 1: not We're not, you know, on the goddamn Titanic, jumping

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Speaker 1: on lifeboats yet. So I entered at the door and

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Speaker 1: the man looks at me and he says, you're gonna

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Speaker 1: have to check that, and I'm like and it's like why,

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Speaker 1: And it's like why, of course? Why? Why? I know

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Speaker 1: why because a fucking donkey came on the plane and

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Speaker 1: said so obviously he's gonna say why because all these

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Speaker 1: are the things. So I'm like, there's no closet, but

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Speaker 1: I'm not in first class when they have a closet

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Speaker 1: that you never even get anyway where they put their

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Speaker 1: fucking coats. And he's like, well no, and I'm like okay,

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Speaker 1: And so everything you do because there's nothing to do.

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Speaker 1: There's nothing to do when you're sitting on a plane,

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Speaker 1: but like, look at everything everyone else is doing that's

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Speaker 1: annoying or wrong or being extra or being like a diva.

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Speaker 1: And now some people know who I am. So I'm

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Speaker 1: self conscious of every move, which will get to in

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Speaker 1: a second because my assistant put me in an interesting

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Speaker 1: position on the same flight. So so I now and

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Speaker 1: feeling like I'm gonna I want to believe him that

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Speaker 1: it's all full, but I want to be like a

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Speaker 1: non public person and just be a fucking Karen, and

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Speaker 1: I want to know what's going on. In these above things.

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Speaker 1: So and of course I'm in the front row, so

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Speaker 1: I have nothing beneath me where I couldn't have put

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Speaker 1: that bag anyway. But he was like, and we'll also

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Speaker 1: have to find something for your other which is just

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Speaker 1: my toe. He was already drilling down on my toe.

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Speaker 1: We hadn't even talked about the checking of this thing,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, he's like, I'm a losso have

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Speaker 1: to find because I didn't have any under my seat.

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Speaker 1: I only had like a normal size square toad and

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Speaker 1: like the seat. So now I'm sweating, and anybody else

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Speaker 1: who wants to get on the plane, this is the thing.

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Speaker 1: And I don't want to create a drama. And I'm

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Speaker 1: just like okay. So I opened up the two front things.

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Speaker 1: But you know how like the first one is connected

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Speaker 1: to the second one. They don't like stop they're connected.

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Speaker 1: So I opened up the first one, and of course

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Speaker 1: there are you know, bags for these three people in

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Speaker 1: those two and maybe one of them has a purse.

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Speaker 1: So I opened up this, but I could see to

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Speaker 1: the second one. There's only one bag in there, and

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Speaker 1: it's like one and a half bags. But you literally,

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Speaker 1: and I mean, I've jammed fucking bags on the plane.

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Speaker 1: All you had to do is like like just move

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Speaker 1: it over, like a normal thing, like moving over. I

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Speaker 1: was like, and so I look at it and said, yeah,

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Speaker 1: well I go. I opened up. I go. I like

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Speaker 1: to come from a place of yes in these situations

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Speaker 1: and just moving this ahead and puts my bag and

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Speaker 1: the other bag with no problem. Because it was like

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Speaker 1: this man started with a place and know and I

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Speaker 1: was gonna have to check my bag and not even

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Speaker 1: think about. All I did was open one compartment and

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Speaker 1: it was there. But it started off on like this

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Speaker 1: aggressive thing where I was the bad guy because I

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Speaker 1: had said it, and I like, you know, and I

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Speaker 1: was in my mind I was a no one all too.

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Speaker 1: I was like, say, one cabinet I opened and and

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Speaker 1: solved this crime. So the moral is I like for

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Speaker 1: someone to just come from the place said yes when

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Speaker 1: we start, like, I'd like to just at least give

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Speaker 1: me the god damn benefit of the debt. Okay, let's

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Speaker 1: open two fucking things and pretend we try. So that's

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Speaker 1: what happened on my play