1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,560 Speaker 1: Buggle up, hold on tight, regret it for you here. 2 00:00:02,560 --> 00:00:05,720 Speaker 1: It is a Strawberry letter subject Something ain't right with 3 00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:10,000 Speaker 1: my fiance and his BFF. Dear Stephen Shirley. I reconnected 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:13,080 Speaker 1: with an old high school flame in January, and we 5 00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:16,200 Speaker 1: got engaged a couple of weeks ago. Well before he 6 00:00:16,320 --> 00:00:18,720 Speaker 1: asked me to marry him, he told me about his 7 00:00:18,880 --> 00:00:21,759 Speaker 1: female best friend. He told me that he had sex 8 00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: with his best friend years ago, but they didn't have 9 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:28,880 Speaker 1: any romantic feelings whatsoever for each other. Now, of course, 10 00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:32,000 Speaker 1: I was very uncomfortable with their friendship, but I didn't 11 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:34,879 Speaker 1: stress about it because I overheard him telling her how 12 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:38,600 Speaker 1: much he loved me and that I'm the one. This 13 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:42,280 Speaker 1: past weekend, my fiance invited his best friend to lunch 14 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:46,000 Speaker 1: so I could meet her. Lunch was going great. We 15 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:49,800 Speaker 1: were talking and laughing, but then the best friend just 16 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:52,720 Speaker 1: got quiet. I looked over at this heffa and she 17 00:00:52,840 --> 00:00:56,840 Speaker 1: was sitting there crying. My fiance asked her what was wrong, 18 00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:58,920 Speaker 1: and she said, she feels like he is going to 19 00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:02,680 Speaker 1: forget about her when he marries me. My fiance has 20 00:01:02,720 --> 00:01:05,240 Speaker 1: a nerve to tell her that that would never happen. 21 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:08,600 Speaker 1: She stood up and told him that their friendship was over, 22 00:01:08,959 --> 00:01:12,040 Speaker 1: and she stormed out of the restaurant. My fiance and 23 00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:14,280 Speaker 1: I sat in silence for the rest of the meal. 24 00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:16,560 Speaker 1: He hasn't talked to this woman for a couple of 25 00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:20,280 Speaker 1: days now, and I can tell it's bothering him something. 26 00:01:20,319 --> 00:01:24,559 Speaker 1: I'm right here. Why is my fiance stressing about another woman? 27 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:29,840 Speaker 1: Can men really have female best friends they're not attracted to? Wow? 28 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:33,319 Speaker 1: I mean, I guess you know, in some parts of 29 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:36,640 Speaker 1: the world that can be the case, But um, you 30 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,240 Speaker 1: know I have if I'm honest with you, every male 31 00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:42,800 Speaker 1: male friend, quote unquote friend that I've had in my life, 32 00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:46,280 Speaker 1: there has been some sort of something going on. You know. 33 00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:49,280 Speaker 1: You could tell, Yeah, I mean you could. You could 34 00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:51,320 Speaker 1: tell that they liked you, or you could tell that 35 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:56,040 Speaker 1: you know something, there was some sexual tension going on there. Yeah, 36 00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:59,240 Speaker 1: that doesn't mean that we acted on it, but you know, 37 00:01:59,280 --> 00:02:05,480 Speaker 1: a male female of that dynamic, Yeah, you could tell that. 38 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:17,840 Speaker 1: Stupid such an harassment case. What a stupid because you 39 00:02:17,919 --> 00:02:23,200 Speaker 1: might say something else ignorant, right, But far be it 40 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:26,799 Speaker 1: from me to argue with your intuition. If you're already 41 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:30,440 Speaker 1: feeling something isn't right, then it probably isn't. I mean, yes, 42 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:33,359 Speaker 1: they've been intimate in the past, but as your friend 43 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:35,920 Speaker 1: told you, he no longer has romantic feelings for his 44 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,400 Speaker 1: best friend. But this is I think where your intuition 45 00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:42,200 Speaker 1: is really on point. I think the best friend has 46 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:45,639 Speaker 1: some unresolved issues, as she displayed at lunch. I mean, 47 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 1: if she didn't wasn't emotionally connected or tied to him still, 48 00:02:49,919 --> 00:02:53,120 Speaker 1: why would she storm out? Why would she be crying. 49 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:56,839 Speaker 1: There's something going on with her, And I think that 50 00:02:56,880 --> 00:03:00,640 Speaker 1: she's jealous of your relationship and she probably wishes that 51 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:03,920 Speaker 1: it were her, and she does feel left out and 52 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:07,600 Speaker 1: she does want him so um and he may feel 53 00:03:07,639 --> 00:03:10,400 Speaker 1: some kind of way too because it's bothering him. So 54 00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:13,400 Speaker 1: before you decide to walk down the aisle with him 55 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:15,359 Speaker 1: and set a date and do all of those things, 56 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:17,440 Speaker 1: you guys need to get this together. And I don't 57 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:19,760 Speaker 1: know if it's going to be that easy because his 58 00:03:19,919 --> 00:03:22,720 Speaker 1: best friend has some serious issues and if if he's 59 00:03:22,760 --> 00:03:26,240 Speaker 1: bothered by it, he may have some unresolved feelings that 60 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:32,760 Speaker 1: he's not acknowledging or telling you about. Steve. Well, well, 61 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:38,640 Speaker 1: thank you Shirley for that warm, fuzzy rendition of a letter. 62 00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:43,280 Speaker 1: You're so welcome, na here, come to ignorance. Let's just 63 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:45,600 Speaker 1: go and get it. We really hell going on here, 64 00:03:45,840 --> 00:03:50,120 Speaker 1: So may write by my fiance and his bf L. 65 00:03:50,800 --> 00:04:00,440 Speaker 1: We have renamed BL to big Fat Freak. Oh right here, collar, 66 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:05,880 Speaker 1: Something ain't right with my fear, his big free that's 67 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:11,640 Speaker 1: just b FL. Any day is happening him? I reconnected 68 00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:14,360 Speaker 1: with an old high school flame in January. We were 69 00:04:14,440 --> 00:04:21,839 Speaker 1: engaged a couple of weeks ago. Oh that's quick. January, Mabel, yeah, bam, 70 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:25,880 Speaker 1: all the crack January February, March, that ninety day went 71 00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:29,560 Speaker 1: out the window. Okay, cool? He told you about this 72 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:33,240 Speaker 1: female friend he gout. That's his b FL, who would 73 00:04:33,279 --> 00:04:35,680 Speaker 1: be referred to from now on in this letter as 74 00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:41,280 Speaker 1: BFF the Big Fat Free. He told me he had 75 00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:44,800 Speaker 1: sex with his best friend years ago, but they don't 76 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: have any romantic feelings whatsoever for each other. You ain't 77 00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:53,159 Speaker 1: got to have romantic feelings to have sex. That's not 78 00:04:53,279 --> 00:05:00,880 Speaker 1: a requirement romantic feelings to have sex, what y'all? You 79 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:05,239 Speaker 1: just lady, You ain't that old because you're hooked up 80 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:08,920 Speaker 1: right after high school old high school flame. I don't 81 00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:11,680 Speaker 1: know how y'all anyway, they're pretty, they're young. I was saying, 82 00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:14,000 Speaker 1: of course, I was very uncomfortable with their friendship, but 83 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:15,839 Speaker 1: I didn't stress about it because I heard him on 84 00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:17,640 Speaker 1: the phone telling him how much he loved me and 85 00:05:17,680 --> 00:05:20,440 Speaker 1: that I'm the one. Wasn't nobody on the other end. 86 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:26,880 Speaker 1: H You heard him on the phone, but she wasn't 87 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:32,120 Speaker 1: on the phone. See, I know, I didn't think this 88 00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:35,040 Speaker 1: is a good game. Here. Let me tell you how 89 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:37,480 Speaker 1: much I love her, and she is the one. She 90 00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:43,320 Speaker 1: had been home on. You got fair a line, lady, 91 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:47,800 Speaker 1: we come back. I'll tell you the rest of it. 92 00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:51,000 Speaker 1: Some ain't right with my fiance and his bf L, 93 00:05:52,279 --> 00:05:56,160 Speaker 1: which is referred to her as the big fat free 94 00:05:56,520 --> 00:05:58,800 Speaker 1: all right now. They told me they had sex when 95 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:03,560 Speaker 1: they were best friends, but they don't have romantic feelings whatsoever. 96 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:08,119 Speaker 1: You ain't gotta have feelings to have sex here, bought. 97 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:11,400 Speaker 1: Of course, I was uncomfortable, and I didn't see see 98 00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:14,760 Speaker 1: stress about it because I overheard him telling her how 99 00:06:14,839 --> 00:06:17,880 Speaker 1: much he loves me and that I'm the one. She 100 00:06:18,040 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 1: had already hung up. The only person got that message. Wishie. 101 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:28,839 Speaker 1: That's funny he had hung up. Wow, See I know 102 00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:32,800 Speaker 1: how this go right? This past weekend, My fields Say 103 00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:35,800 Speaker 1: invited his best friend into lunch so I could meet up. 104 00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:40,960 Speaker 1: Lunch was going gray. We was talking and laughing, yeah, 105 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:44,000 Speaker 1: but then the best friend got quiet. I looked over 106 00:06:44,240 --> 00:06:50,720 Speaker 1: this hell fuck and she was sitting there crying. What 107 00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:58,440 Speaker 1: happened the only laughing? What ain't remember that time we 108 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:13,640 Speaker 1: do that? Girl? You pray that what? Let just have 109 00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:16,760 Speaker 1: to start crying? Yeah, because she couldn't hold up the 110 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:20,840 Speaker 1: lie no more. See, she wasn't on the phone when 111 00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:26,160 Speaker 1: he told her you was the one we're talking and laughing. 112 00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:29,600 Speaker 1: My fielance Say asked her what was wrong. She says, 113 00:07:29,680 --> 00:07:32,560 Speaker 1: she feels like she forgot he was going to forget 114 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:37,320 Speaker 1: about her when he marries me. My fields had to 115 00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:42,560 Speaker 1: never to tell her that that would never happen. What, Oh, 116 00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:46,960 Speaker 1: that's why ain't no more laughing. See, I'm look at 117 00:07:46,960 --> 00:07:50,600 Speaker 1: what happened to all that laughing? Daddy your feelings? They 118 00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:53,960 Speaker 1: told her. She stood up and told him their friendship 119 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:58,240 Speaker 1: was over, and she stormed out the restaurant. Oh man, 120 00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:01,160 Speaker 1: my fiance saying, I said that in silence for the 121 00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:04,720 Speaker 1: rest of the meal. Now he ain't talking to you 122 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: because he trying to get himself together. When a man 123 00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:13,160 Speaker 1: sitting in silence. His brain ain't silad, it was a 124 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:17,760 Speaker 1: riot going on in his head. The German shepherds was loose, 125 00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:21,120 Speaker 1: and four people had fire hoses, and he was only 126 00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:26,200 Speaker 1: black against the wall at the chriskis he ain't talked 127 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:29,000 Speaker 1: to this woman for a couple of days now, and 128 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:33,640 Speaker 1: I can tell is bothering him? Something ain't right here? 129 00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:39,520 Speaker 1: Why is my fiance stressing about another woman? Because she 130 00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:44,920 Speaker 1: the other woman? This ain't another woman? This the other woman? 131 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:49,960 Speaker 1: Can men really have female best friends that they're not 132 00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:56,199 Speaker 1: attracted to? The answer to that is if they ain't attractive. 133 00:08:58,120 --> 00:09:00,800 Speaker 1: Let me let me read this question. I said for you, kid, 134 00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:06,600 Speaker 1: Can men really have female best friends they're not attracted to? Yes, 135 00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:12,280 Speaker 1: if they're not attractive. Now, was to be f F 136 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:16,600 Speaker 1: really a big fat freak? Or was to be a 137 00:09:16,679 --> 00:09:21,120 Speaker 1: big fan freak? M? Yeah, see, that's what you need 138 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:24,080 Speaker 1: to ask yourself. Was to be f F really a 139 00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:28,400 Speaker 1: big fat freak? Or was to be a big fan freak? 140 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:32,559 Speaker 1: I'm gonna see that what I'm gonna go with right there. 141 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:36,080 Speaker 1: That's why he said in silence, because he watched her 142 00:09:36,080 --> 00:09:39,320 Speaker 1: walk out the dough. Now she full figured, though all 143 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:43,720 Speaker 1: but she got it all right, she a curved model. 144 00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:46,800 Speaker 1: Or when she walked out that dough and he saw 145 00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:49,880 Speaker 1: it moving under that dress. Yeah, ha ha ha, he 146 00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:55,040 Speaker 1: see high work. I'm just trying to show y'all high work. 147 00:09:56,520 --> 00:10:03,840 Speaker 1: She started crying because she won't mote she had and 148 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:09,480 Speaker 1: she had allowed him to see more, and he gave 149 00:10:09,640 --> 00:10:14,959 Speaker 1: her more. She was hoping to be mo man. Yes, 150 00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 1: now that she go after dough and what fault because 151 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:28,280 Speaker 1: you don't bought this up in here telling you gonna 152 00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:38,520 Speaker 1: give her the more that I had before. Ye huh, 153 00:10:38,559 --> 00:10:42,440 Speaker 1: that's all this was playing. Well, it's not gonna happen now, 154 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:46,200 Speaker 1: is it. Yep, it's still gonna happen now, nobody again 155 00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:49,120 Speaker 1: up friend, Yeah, because the friend gonna get over it 156 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:54,559 Speaker 1: because he gonna tell her she don't really mean that 157 00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:58,960 Speaker 1: much to me. She'll just get another. But I got 158 00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:03,600 Speaker 1: to marry her cause she's sick. Just let me marry her, right, 159 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:07,040 Speaker 1: coming up in ten minutes. She's sick, she got a 160 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:10,040 Speaker 1: terminal illness, and I'm gonna marry her so she can 161 00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:12,839 Speaker 1: have it. That's her wish. Oh my god, Now I'll 162 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:16,319 Speaker 1: tell you what to do, Okay, Steve, we gotta get 163 00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:18,160 Speaker 1: out of here. You know that you can email us 164 00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:21,160 Speaker 1: or instagram us her thoughts on today's Strawberry Letter at 165 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:24,120 Speaker 1: my Girl Shirley and We'll be back. You're listening to 166 00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:25,920 Speaker 1: say Morning show