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Speaker 1: Twenty twenty five is a year of the snake, because

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Speaker 1: we're supposed to be shedding all our old bullshit. Yes,

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Speaker 1: like all our old bullshit, the bad energy, the negative energy,

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Speaker 1: you know, the things that have caused you guilt, the

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Speaker 1: things that you're insecure about. Like this is the year

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Speaker 1: that you're supposed to really, really, really let it all go.

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Speaker 1: And it's about new beginnings and transformation. And in twenty

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Speaker 1: twenty six is the year of the Horse, and you're

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Speaker 1: supposed to get off, get on that horse, and you know,

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Speaker 1: ride into your destiny.

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Speaker 2: Sold Thanks for watching, guys. Today's episode is brought to

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Speaker 2: you by boost Mobile. Today's guest is the co host

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Speaker 2: of the infamous Breakfast Club, one of the most influential

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Speaker 2: and longest running radio shows in hip hop and pop

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Speaker 2: culture history. He's the founder of the Black Effect podcast network,

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Speaker 2: the owner of Black Privileged Publishing, a New York Times

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Speaker 2: bestselling author, an advocate for mental health. He's helped shift

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Speaker 2: culture by telling the truth out loud. He's a father,

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Speaker 2: a husband, a friend.

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Speaker 1: Welcome God, Angie Martinez in real life podcast What's Happening?

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Speaker 1: Happy to be here. I'll be hearing that sometimes and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, who the fuck is she talking about? You

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Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like, who is that? What do

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Speaker 1: you mean? Like when I just hear all of that stuff,

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Speaker 1: I'd be like, who's that person?

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Speaker 3: Stop?

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Speaker 1: Sometimes I do you don't.

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Speaker 2: Have great pride in what you've accomplished, and yes, as

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Speaker 2: you don't feel like connected to it deeply, like.

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Speaker 1: Connected to it deeply. So interesting when I was home

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Speaker 1: for Thanksgiving and I was staying in my mom's house

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Speaker 1: and I was staying in the room that I grew

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Speaker 1: up in, Like that's the moments that like those things

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Speaker 1: hit you because you know, you think about how I

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Speaker 1: was in here all of these years praying, you know,

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Speaker 1: to be in these be in these moments like this.

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Speaker 1: So when you are in the midst of your you know,

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Speaker 1: answered prayers, Yes, that's what it hits you.

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Speaker 3: What are you praying for in that room?

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Speaker 2: Uh?

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Speaker 1: Just to be you know what's so funny. I tell

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Speaker 1: this story all the time, But when I first started

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Speaker 1: doing radio, I used to always say I want to

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Speaker 1: be a super jock, Like I don't want to be

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Speaker 1: just the local jock doing time and temperature and you

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Speaker 1: know whatever. Market I was like, ye, And I used

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Speaker 1: to always say, if I want to do it, I

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Speaker 1: want to do it on the level of the Tom Joiners,

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Speaker 1: the Angie martinez Is, the Wendy Whims, the Howard Sterns.

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Speaker 1: Like that was my mindset even back then. So that

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Speaker 1: was like what I That's literally what I was.

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Speaker 3: But when you're a kid, you weren't thinking about radio, right.

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Speaker 1: Oh as a kid, that was well, see, I guess

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Speaker 1: when I say the answered prayers, I do think from

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Speaker 1: that time I was like nineteen to now, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean, because yeah, because I was just praying

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Speaker 1: to stay out of jail. When I was a young

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Speaker 1: young kid, hoping that my mom didn't come home and

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Speaker 1: realize that I was. I was, you know, sitting at

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Speaker 1: home because I was suspended and didn't tell them. Like

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Speaker 1: that's the type of stuff I was praying for back then.

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Speaker 3: And then at some point radio happened.

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Speaker 1: Nineteen ninety eight, nineteen.

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Speaker 3: Ninety eight, young Charlsmagne on the radio.

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Speaker 1: Nineteen ninety eight. That's when I started off as an intern.

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Speaker 1: So I got on the air like nineteen ninety nine,

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Speaker 1: but I started off as an intern in nineteen ninety eight.

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Speaker 2: Yo, your evolution is wildly inspiring to people. I think

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Speaker 2: not and radio, but just across the board and even

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Speaker 2: as a as a father, I mean, as a husband

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Speaker 2: and as a man. You've been very honest in the

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Speaker 2: books and stuff. It's funny because you come up in

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Speaker 2: the pod a lot.

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Speaker 1: I had Cardi here, I saw Cardy.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, you came up in both those episodes.

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Speaker 2: That's right because Carty was you know, went through what

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Speaker 2: she went through, and she had a very strong theory

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Speaker 2: about when you don't treat people well, even a spouse

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Speaker 2: or even a girl you're stringing along like that, karma

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Speaker 2: comes back to you. And then we were talking about

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Speaker 2: your theory about becoming this better husband and how your

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Speaker 2: life flourished after that.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely, And it's so crazy, right, Like I've always told

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Speaker 1: these stories and for whatever reason, people act like this

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Speaker 1: was yesterday. It's like, no, bro, I've been clean for

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Speaker 1: like nine years out here in these streets. No, Like, no,

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Speaker 1: not at all. But it's like, really, were you telling

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Speaker 1: the story back then?

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Speaker 3: You weren't telling the story back then, story in the

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Speaker 3: past few years.

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Speaker 1: Probably probably in the past few years. Is I had

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Speaker 1: to make sure I really was what I said I was,

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Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like when you make that commitment. Though,

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Speaker 1: like I always talk about the color and you know

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Speaker 1: where sei he pointed that fingers, and ain't no good

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Speaker 1: gonna come to you and tell you do right by me?

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Speaker 1: That is real? And so what happens when you actually

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Speaker 1: do right by the woman you love? What happens when

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Speaker 1: you actually do right, you know, by your wife. For me,

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Speaker 1: my life has done nothing would go up, up, up,

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Speaker 1: up up. So I always say to myself, like, why

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Speaker 1: would I ever go backwards? Especially when I continue to

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Speaker 1: see men make those same rookie mistakes losing everything. You

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Speaker 1: see what just happened to the head coach of the

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Speaker 1: University of Michigan, like thirty nine years old, married with kids,

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Speaker 1: you know, playing around on the side, and like now

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Speaker 1: his whole shit is fucked up. It's like, why would

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Speaker 1: I make those mistakes when I'm seeing what's happening to

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Speaker 1: other people? And even before that, like I saw what

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Speaker 1: was happening like to my pops and my uncles, and

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Speaker 1: my pops would always tell me the worst thing that

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Speaker 1: he ever did was do you know, wrong by my mother?

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Speaker 1: You know, even though he ended up you know, getting remarried,

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Speaker 1: but he just that's just as a whole that you

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Speaker 1: know is in his life that he just regrets, you know,

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Speaker 1: even even to this day.

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Speaker 2: Did you know that at the time, or did you

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Speaker 2: know that after you had changed your life and saw

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Speaker 2: the you know, the effect of it, or did you

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Speaker 2: make that decision with the intention of like, my life

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Speaker 2: will be better if I do right by her both.

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Speaker 1: Because like you know, it's like when you did, I

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Speaker 1: got to deal with anxiety, right, So it's just like,

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Speaker 1: why add extra stress to your life that you don't need.

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Speaker 1: And plus you just feel fake, You feel phony, like

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Speaker 1: you literally laying down with the person you claim to love,

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Speaker 1: this person that you got a whole life with what

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Speaker 1: you're lying to that person Like, I'm not one of

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Speaker 1: the MP I got. Yeah, I don't believe in that

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Speaker 1: whole keep it, you know, real with your homies. But

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Speaker 1: then you know, lie to the woman that you claim

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Speaker 1: to love and you really made vows in front of God. Like,

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Speaker 1: to me, that's just fake. I can't live my life

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Speaker 1: in that way. I don't like to talk behind people's back.

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Speaker 1: If if I said something behind your back, eventually I

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Speaker 1: got to say it to your face. I've already said

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Speaker 1: it to your face, so now I'm talking about you.

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Speaker 1: I can't live my life like that. So it's just

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Speaker 1: like laying down with a person, like living a whole

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Speaker 1: life with a person, but you're actually living a whole

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Speaker 1: lie with a person. No, that's not the way I

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Speaker 1: want to I want to you.

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Speaker 2: It's funny that you said you waited to say that,

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Speaker 2: because one of the things I always wondered when I

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Speaker 2: would hear you tell that story is, you know, because

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Speaker 2: change doesn't happen in one second, no, you know, And

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Speaker 2: sometimes behaviors take a little while to kind of break,

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Speaker 2: And I wonder if any of that stuff ever still

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Speaker 2: showed up for you, the temptation, the bad habits, the.

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Speaker 1: Nope, because it's literally like it's like changing your diet,

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Speaker 1: like literally like changing your lifestyle. You know, when you

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Speaker 1: start working out and you start eating clean, it's like

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Speaker 1: you don't even really want the junk that you used

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Speaker 1: to eat anymore, like, and if you even do try

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Speaker 1: to indulge in it a little bit, then you'll probably

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Speaker 1: o D and go crazy. So it's just like, nah,

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Speaker 1: just leave it alone. I don't need it at all

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Speaker 1: in any way, shape.

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Speaker 2: Or form, really, So no old behaviors even just feelings

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Speaker 2: like no old behaviors.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, feelings, I mean you feel meaning like you might

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Speaker 1: see somebody and be like, oh that person's attractive, but.

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Speaker 2: No, no, not even not even other women, just like

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Speaker 2: you would have to change a lot about yourself to

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Speaker 2: make that big of a shift in your life, right,

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Speaker 2: And I think I don't. I think a lot of

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Speaker 2: not all the time. I'm sure sometimes change happens with

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Speaker 2: an idea.

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Speaker 1: I've always been a cold turkey type of person. Turkey

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Speaker 1: like literally, I've always been a stop there's no you know,

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Speaker 1: doing a little bit of the wrong thing. I've always

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Speaker 1: been like a stop person, like just it's over, it's done,

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Speaker 1: leave it alone. I'm not looking back. And I think

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Speaker 1: that's one of my one of the things I thank

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Speaker 1: God for that he gave me that type of mind

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Speaker 1: that I can easily just be like stop viting. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and then it's also a little I don't know what

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Speaker 1: the world would be, but I'm also like that with people,

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Speaker 1: which I don't know if that's good or not.

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Speaker 3: Cut people off.

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Speaker 1: In a heartbeat, you know what I mean. That's how

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Speaker 1: it don't worry. It don't matter how long we known

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Speaker 1: each other, I might still have love for you, But

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Speaker 1: if you're doing anything that's detrimental to me or detrimental

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Speaker 1: to what I got going on, I feel like you

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Speaker 1: know you did me wrong in any way. It's like God, bless,

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Speaker 1: I wish you the best, but I'm on to the next.

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Speaker 2: Wow, what about vices? Never had any vices or anything

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Speaker 2: like that that you had to wean off of anything.

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Speaker 1: Like cocaine? Bull?

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Speaker 3: Why have I not heard about this journey? Random journey

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Speaker 3: you're discovering the uh.

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Speaker 1: I think people pleasing can be a vice. I think

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Speaker 1: people pleasing can be a vice, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 1: doing uh things for people just because you just because

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Speaker 1: you don't want them to do a certain way about

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Speaker 1: you or dislike you. I don't know that. I don't

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Speaker 1: know if that could because you don't give oh no no.

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Speaker 1: I was a big people please that came when I

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Speaker 1: can tell you exactly where it started from. Okay, not

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Speaker 1: to get dark, but when when I was eight years old,

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Speaker 1: I used to get you know, molested by a woman

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Speaker 1: that used to be in our family. And when I

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Speaker 1: made her stop, she used to always call me ugly, right,

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Speaker 1: and you know, tell me I got a big no's

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Speaker 1: and all this type of ship, and so I would

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Speaker 1: still let her do it just to you know, I

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Speaker 1: feel like, yes, so she wouldn't call me that. And

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Speaker 1: so that led to me being a people pleaser in

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Speaker 1: my adulthood, which you know is basically you know, letting

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Speaker 1: people I don't want to say, kind of run over you,

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Speaker 1: but letting them get over on you, just because you

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Speaker 1: would rather avoid, you know, them having something negative to say.

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Speaker 2: It's not a personality trade I would have imagined, because

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Speaker 2: you seem so free to say what you want and

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Speaker 2: you know your confrontational when needed.

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Speaker 1: I love confrontation. Yes, Why I don't know. I think

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Speaker 1: because my dad always told me that the fastest way

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Speaker 1: between two points is the straight line. And my dad

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Speaker 1: was a person who he did not like the bullshit,

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Speaker 1: even though he might have been one of the number

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Speaker 1: one bullshit is out there at least in my mom.

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Speaker 1: But I always saw him just confront things head on, right,

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Speaker 1: Like even when I used to watch him like my mom,

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Speaker 1: arguing stuff, it was like very direct arguments, right, And

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Speaker 1: so I just always felt like I would rather just

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Speaker 1: talk to you face to face. I never understood the

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Speaker 1: whole you know, you got a problem with somebody but

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Speaker 1: you're telling everybody but the person like, things don't have

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Speaker 1: to be violent, right, Like you can get to it,

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Speaker 1: just get to it. Yeah, I always felt like you

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Speaker 1: could smooth things over with the conversations, no matter how

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Speaker 1: heated the conversation got, or even if you know, when

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Speaker 1: you were young, y'all did have a little kerfuffle and

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Speaker 1: through a little bit of blows you would just get

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Speaker 1: back to being friends in moments. That's it. I always

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Speaker 1: felt like that. So I've never had a problem with

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Speaker 1: the confrontation at all, but to keep the peace. A

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Speaker 1: lot of times it's like, all right, let that person

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Speaker 1: you know, get that way, even if it's you know,

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Speaker 1: detrimental to me. But not anymore.

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Speaker 2: You ever notice how everything keeps going up? I mean

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Speaker 2: rent is going up, Streaming services are going up. Even

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Speaker 2: like your favorite burrito place all of a sudden wants

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Speaker 2: to charge you for salsa. You go to the supermarket,

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Speaker 2: they want to charge you extra for the bag.

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Speaker 3: It's kind of crazy out here.

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Speaker 2: The good thing is with boost Mobile, you and your

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Speaker 2: phone bill do not have to play that game.

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Speaker 3: You don't have to play the will this go up soon?

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Speaker 1: Game? Why?

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Speaker 2: Because boost Mobile has an unlimited talk, text and data

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Speaker 2: plan at a price that will never go up. In fact,

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00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:58,559
Speaker 2: it's the same price you'll pay for life. So switch

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00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:01,079
Speaker 2: now to unlimited wireless at a price that will.

256
00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:02,960
Speaker 3: Never go up. Only at boost Mobile.

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00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,960
Speaker 2: After thirty gigabytes, customers may experience slower speeds. Customers will

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Speaker 2: pay twenty five dollars a month as long as they

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00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:12,120
Speaker 2: remain active on the boost Mobile Unlimited plan. So how

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Speaker 2: do you break the habit of people pleasing? Is it

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Speaker 2: a slow It's not a cold turkey thing, right, You

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Speaker 2: have to actually work on that.

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Speaker 3: Ye.

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Speaker 1: You just got to make sure that the things you're doing,

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Speaker 1: you know, for somebody else is because you genuinely want

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Speaker 1: to do them, You genuinely want to help, and you're

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Speaker 1: not really losing anything in the process. Like that's not

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Speaker 1: an even exchange, right, Like if I do something for you,

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Speaker 1: but then I feel.

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Speaker 3: Like depleted exactly.

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Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Like, that's not an even

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Speaker 1: exchange of energy. Like I'm a poor into you. You're

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Speaker 1: gonna pour back into me in some way shape or

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Speaker 1: for me. I don't even mean, like you know, I

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Speaker 1: might provide you an opportunity. I just like being around

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Speaker 1: good people, like you know, you just like being around

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Speaker 1: good energy. Sometimes that person that makes you laugh, or

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Speaker 1: that person you know you can have a healthy debate with,

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Speaker 1: that person that makes you smile for no reason, that

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Speaker 1: person you like to talk to on the phone for

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Speaker 1: no reason. To me, those are even exchanges of energy.

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Speaker 1: But if I do you know something for you because

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Speaker 1: you want it done, and I feel empty after the fact,

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Speaker 1: and you know you going on about your day, that's

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Speaker 1: not a fair exchange at all.

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Speaker 3: That is people pleasing.

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Speaker 1: That is one hundred percent people please, got it? And

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Speaker 1: I learned that in therapy. By the way, I love that.

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Speaker 3: I want to learn all about all the things you

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Speaker 3: learned in therapy. I want you to teach us all

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Speaker 3: the things today. Charlotte Mage. It's so funnycause I never

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Speaker 3: thought of myself, you know, from New York and from

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Speaker 3: the culture.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I never thought of myself as a people

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Speaker 2: pleaser until like recently, big this big age. I'm actually

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Speaker 2: confronting that fully made being feeling depleted by certain situations

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Speaker 2: and just testing the waters of like let me do

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Speaker 2: I want to do that. I don't so I'm not

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Speaker 2: gonna and then consciously checking myself to not feel bad

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Speaker 2: about it. But it's like a that's why I say

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Speaker 2: I'm always curious about people's process because sometimes change doesn't

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Speaker 2: happen cold turkey like that. I'm not gonna shoot on

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Speaker 2: my wife anymore, and then you don't forever. Sometimes habits

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Speaker 2: things the things that shape us. It takes a little

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Speaker 2: while to kind of like unravel that.

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Speaker 1: Well, that's why you don't practice bad habits. And I

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Speaker 1: think that, you know, one thing I've learned, the older

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Speaker 1: I've gotten, I've definitely probably done more unlearning than learning.

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Speaker 1: Like that's the crazy thing about like when you first

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Speaker 1: start going to therapy, Like when I first started going

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Speaker 1: to therapy in twenty sixteen, by twenty eighteen, I probably

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Speaker 1: was the most confused I had ever been in my life.

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Speaker 1: Too much information, not even too much information. It's everything

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Speaker 1: I thought I knew. I realized I didn't know right

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Speaker 1: as much as I thought I did. And I realized

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Speaker 1: that a lot of the things that I was using

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Speaker 1: for survival weren't going to allow me to get to

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Speaker 1: that next level of life that I wanted to get to,

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Speaker 1: whether personally, professionally, whatever it was. I knew I had

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Speaker 1: to let so many things go and that's a scary

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Speaker 1: process too, right, because I think a lot of times

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Speaker 1: people hold on to a lot of those habits because

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Speaker 1: it's literally what they'd gotten there too. Those are the safe,

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Speaker 1: comfortable things that they can go to and always use

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Speaker 1: when they, you know, are just going through life. But

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Speaker 1: when you realize, like that stuff in that toolbox, man,

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Speaker 1: that's not gonna those keys, not gonna lock these these

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Speaker 1: new doors I'm trying to get to, that's a scary.

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Speaker 1: That's a scary place to be at, especially when you

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Speaker 1: at what I was. I thirty six, thirty seven.

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Speaker 3: Years old when you started doing therapy.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I started going to therapy in twenty sixteen. Yep,

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Speaker 1: so I was like thirty seven, thirty eight. Because I

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Speaker 1: remember when I turned forty, I just was I just balled,

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Speaker 1: like I mean, just crying like a baby. I was

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Speaker 1: drunk too, but I was just crying like I was

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Speaker 1: crying like a baby when I turned forty, and it

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Speaker 1: just felt but it felt like a release, like I

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Speaker 1: remember literally remember it. That night. It was like I

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Speaker 1: was I was, I was in Angula, like my favorite island,

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Speaker 1: and I was just my wife had made this, she

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Speaker 1: had got this video made for me and it was

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Speaker 1: like like all my friends, like, you know, wishing me

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Speaker 1: happy birthday, and I just cried, like what was it though?

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Speaker 3: What was happening?

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Speaker 1: I don't know. It's like sometimes when you turn certain ages,

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Speaker 1: like if you really are doing this life thing correctly,

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Speaker 1: you can feel those new dimensions open up, you can

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Speaker 1: feel those new portals of life open up. And you know,

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Speaker 1: twenty sixteen October twenty sixteen is when I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm not cheating my wife anymore. I'm gonna, you know,

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Speaker 1: really do the righteous thing. I'ma start going to therapy,

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Speaker 1: doing the work on myself. And so twenty eighteen, I

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Speaker 1: was like, maybe what a year and a half, two

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Speaker 1: years into that, right, and it kind of just hit

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Speaker 1: me like, yeah, that old I'm not that person anymore.

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Speaker 1: Like to it was like one of those things that

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Speaker 1: God was showing me if you, if you really want to,

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Speaker 1: you know, be what I have destined you to be,

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Speaker 1: keep doing what you're doing. And it kind of just

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Speaker 1: hit me like just watching everybody with happy all day, gratitude,

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Speaker 1: tears of joy, yeah, all of it, and it really

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Speaker 1: just felt like a release. And I was like, you

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Speaker 1: know what, I'm forty now, I act like I love that.

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Speaker 3: Do you have any like I don't know.

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Speaker 2: It feels like the before or after right of Charlemagne,

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Speaker 2: before that moment in time and then after it kind

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Speaker 2: of it's like two different people. Do you ever look

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Speaker 2: back at things you did back then with guilt or remorse.

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Speaker 1: Or not guilt or remorse. I think you do cringe sometimes,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean, because like all everything we

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Speaker 1: do has been documented, you know, especially in this on

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Speaker 1: air business, right, but so sometimes you do look at

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Speaker 1: things and you cringe. But it's only because like my kids,

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Speaker 1: I got a seventeen year old, a ten year old,

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Speaker 1: a seven year old, four year old, they asking questions,

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Speaker 1: you know, of course, so it's like sometimes, but you know,

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Speaker 1: I've learned to accept every version of myself, every single

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Speaker 1: version of myself was the version that I needed to

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Speaker 1: be in that moment.

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Speaker 3: And has there been any apologizing or any need no

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Speaker 3: need to Like.

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Speaker 2: I don't know all the time, I don't know why

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Speaker 2: the thing that comes up when I ask you that

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Speaker 2: question when you talk about on air. At first I

386
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Speaker 2: was talking about your personal life, your wife and stuff,

387
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Speaker 2: but like even on air, when you see that clip

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Speaker 2: of like little Mama crying in the chair.

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Speaker 3: Like does that do something to you? Or do you not?

390
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Speaker 2: Or a moment like that, or maybe you hurt somebody's

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Speaker 2: feelings or maybe you emotionally said something that.

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Speaker 1: I can't see him to think about the little Mama situation,

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Speaker 1: think about it, because that always comes. People act like

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Speaker 1: that was yesterday, like look at my faith, Look look

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Speaker 1: how good my skin looks Now my skin was terrible.

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Speaker 2: And I think about the highlight reel of moments of

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Speaker 2: like shocking Charlemagne moments.

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Speaker 3: You know, it's bird man, it's little Mama.

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Speaker 1: But even little Mama says she wasn't crying at me.

400
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Speaker 1: She was crying because we bought up well, her mother,

401
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Speaker 1: who had passed away, God blessed the dead, had came up.

402
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Speaker 1: So in that moment, that's what it was. She said

403
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Speaker 1: that herself. But also the night before when they asked

404
00:17:52,080 --> 00:17:54,560
Speaker 1: Little Mama to come on, it was like like it

405
00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:56,280
Speaker 1: was like, you know, Charlamagne got jokes. A little MoMA

406
00:17:56,320 --> 00:17:58,040
Speaker 1: was like, I'm from Harlem. I got jokes too, So

407
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Speaker 1: I thought we was going to have a nice little

408
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Speaker 1: back and forth, which we did. If you go back

409
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Speaker 1: and wash it in full, she was throwing some jokes.

410
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Speaker 1: Mine was just a little better at the time, that's all.

411
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Speaker 1: That's all it was. But I have but but nothing

412
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Speaker 1: but much respect for little mommy. You know, little Mama's

413
00:18:12,720 --> 00:18:14,760
Speaker 1: dad ran down on him because of that ship. No,

414
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Speaker 1: because you know, I don't be outside, so he ran that,

415
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Speaker 1: he ran he called him with the hammer and everything

416
00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:23,400
Speaker 1: like no. Yeah, and he told that story before.

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Speaker 3: I vaguely remember about that part.

418
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Speaker 1: Yeah, yikes. So you definitely don't want to cause those

419
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:31,320
Speaker 1: kinds of issues and those kind of problems, you know

420
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Speaker 1: what I'm saying. But I got good.

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Speaker 2: But is there any been You don't even have to

422
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Speaker 2: say what they are, But have there been moments where

423
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Speaker 2: you see where you're like.

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Speaker 1: Oh, absolutely, especially when I used to work with Wendy.

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Speaker 1: Wendy was the one. Because I got with Wendy, I

426
00:18:42,359 --> 00:18:45,359
Speaker 1: was really compromising myself for a position, like I was

427
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:48,520
Speaker 1: really the pit bull, like purposely that was my job.

428
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Speaker 1: And she would be like, get get get them. I

429
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Speaker 1: want you to get that person.

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Speaker 3: You know, she wasn't enough, she wasn't doing enough well.

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Speaker 1: She was trying to make the transition. She was trying

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Speaker 1: to make a transition to television. Oh she was trying

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Speaker 1: to do good, absolutely, and it was just it would

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Speaker 1: be sometimes where like my conscience would be like why,

435
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:07,439
Speaker 1: like and one I always remember is Kelly Rowling, Like

436
00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:10,879
Speaker 1: she was like get up, and I'm like Kelly Roling,

437
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:14,800
Speaker 1: like why, Like what did Kelly Rolling to?

438
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:16,400
Speaker 3: What did you do?

439
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:19,280
Speaker 1: I think I came up with this angle, like we

440
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:22,320
Speaker 1: we both know how it feels to be sidekicks, so

441
00:19:22,359 --> 00:19:23,879
Speaker 1: I'm a side. I kicked the winning she decided to

442
00:19:23,920 --> 00:19:27,320
Speaker 1: kick the Beyonce this great, stupid, disrespectful shit for no reason.

443
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:30,000
Speaker 1: And I remember when Kelly wanted to do breakfast Club,

444
00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:32,800
Speaker 1: La La hit me like, you know, yo, Kelly wants

445
00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:34,280
Speaker 1: to do breakfast club. But she was like when she

446
00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:36,399
Speaker 1: met you with one day, it was bullshit basically, So

447
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:39,120
Speaker 1: immediately I apologize to her when before she even walked

448
00:19:39,119 --> 00:19:41,080
Speaker 1: in the studio and when we got on air. And

449
00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:42,959
Speaker 1: I wrote about that story in my book because I

450
00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:46,919
Speaker 1: always tell people, don't compromise yourself for a position, Like

451
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:50,600
Speaker 1: what the hell was I attacking Kelly Rolling for? Like

452
00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:51,680
Speaker 1: just because it's like.

453
00:19:52,080 --> 00:19:57,480
Speaker 3: The nicest boy, She's just like the purest little soul, you.

454
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,960
Speaker 1: See what I'm saying. And I still don't even know

455
00:20:00,119 --> 00:20:01,159
Speaker 1: what the issue.

456
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:03,359
Speaker 3: Was was she was she gracious to your apology?

457
00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:05,679
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, absolutely, I love Kelly. Me and Kelly like

458
00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:10,320
Speaker 1: we super locked in. Then yeah, I love that.

459
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:13,600
Speaker 3: Okay, guys, holidays season is upon us. I mean it

460
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,800
Speaker 3: is right here. You do not have a lot of time.

461
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:18,560
Speaker 2: And I was telling you last episode about how I

462
00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:21,520
Speaker 2: was ordering stuff for the holidays, not just gifts. You

463
00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:23,760
Speaker 2: can get gifts all the gifts on Wayfair, which make

464
00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:25,800
Speaker 2: it very easy, but I was also ordering stuff to

465
00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:29,479
Speaker 2: make my house just more family friendly, just to have

466
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:33,119
Speaker 2: more space, extra air, mattress, the phone.

467
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:33,879
Speaker 3: Pad that goes up.

468
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:36,240
Speaker 2: You have a pull out couch, and the mattress on

469
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:38,240
Speaker 2: the pullout couch is not that great. So I got

470
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:40,080
Speaker 2: like a foam mattress that goes on the top, and

471
00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:43,879
Speaker 2: now it's super comfortable and great comforters. Some extra sheets.

472
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:47,560
Speaker 2: I mean, my house is ready for guests and super easy.

473
00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:50,520
Speaker 2: Everything came really fast. Wayfair is really good at delivering quickly,

474
00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:52,399
Speaker 2: so I got that taken care of. And then I

475
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:54,439
Speaker 2: got a couple of little knickknacks just to judge up

476
00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:56,960
Speaker 2: the house to make it festive. I haven't been that

477
00:20:57,119 --> 00:20:59,960
Speaker 2: festive this year, so getting a few things to kind

478
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:03,560
Speaker 2: kind of make it easy. Actually helped, and I was like, Okay,

479
00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:06,800
Speaker 2: maybe I do have a little Christmas spirit, a little tree.

480
00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:09,760
Speaker 2: These like lights that you don't have to light, it

481
00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:13,679
Speaker 2: comes already lit. Just some decorations from the house for

482
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:15,399
Speaker 2: the house and just to judge up the home. And

483
00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:18,080
Speaker 2: you can get all kinds of last minute hosting essentials,

484
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:20,320
Speaker 2: especially if you're hosting a dinner or an event at your house,

485
00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:22,200
Speaker 2: all of it in one place.

486
00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:24,440
Speaker 3: The stuff to host, the stuff for.

487
00:21:24,359 --> 00:21:26,159
Speaker 2: People to stay over and not have to sleep on

488
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:29,320
Speaker 2: the floor or an uncomfortable actress, and gifts for your

489
00:21:29,359 --> 00:21:31,520
Speaker 2: loved ones. So you can get it all and all

490
00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:34,720
Speaker 2: the decor and all the things and celebrate the holidays

491
00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:38,199
Speaker 2: for way less. Go to wayfair dot com. That is

492
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:42,199
Speaker 2: w A y F A I R right now to

493
00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:46,040
Speaker 2: shop all things home. That's wayfair dot com, Every style,

494
00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:47,520
Speaker 2: every home Wayfair.

495
00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:49,200
Speaker 3: Not Kelly Rowland.

496
00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:49,919
Speaker 1: I forgot.

497
00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:51,720
Speaker 3: You did tell that story. You've told every story.

498
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:53,600
Speaker 1: Well, I try. I try to. I try to be

499
00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:55,560
Speaker 1: an open book and just tell people because I want

500
00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:58,880
Speaker 1: people to learn from my mistakes, you know, I want

501
00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:01,119
Speaker 1: I want this next this next generation to know they

502
00:22:01,160 --> 00:22:03,960
Speaker 1: don't have to do that, Like, I'm watching this whole

503
00:22:04,119 --> 00:22:07,320
Speaker 1: new wave of whatever. I don't know if you call

504
00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:10,840
Speaker 1: them shock jocks and the yvery ridiculous. I'm like you

505
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:11,680
Speaker 1: like that.

506
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:13,639
Speaker 3: I saw a clip today of somebody I don't know

507
00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:14,160
Speaker 3: who they were.

508
00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:15,879
Speaker 2: They were like a new I don't know, blog or

509
00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:17,960
Speaker 2: interviewing somebody was and it was just gross, and I

510
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 2: just was like, I feel bad for them. You know,

511
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:21,840
Speaker 2: it's almost like I feel bad for them, but I

512
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:25,119
Speaker 2: also feel gross about I don't know, I feel.

513
00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:27,640
Speaker 1: Bad for them because I know how hurt they really

514
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:30,320
Speaker 1: are on the inside, because you have to be a

515
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:35,200
Speaker 1: really hurt person to talk about certain individuals the way

516
00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:37,440
Speaker 1: that you talk about them, Like it's one thing to

517
00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:40,040
Speaker 1: have an opinion, have some critique, but these people be

518
00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:44,800
Speaker 1: like really vicious, evil, nasty, and I tell them like,

519
00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:46,359
Speaker 1: the other story I tell them is like, you know,

520
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:50,240
Speaker 1: sitting with Wendy earlier this year, and Wendy literally said

521
00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 1: to us at the table, I think I'm in the

522
00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:55,080
Speaker 1: position I'm in because of how I used to talk

523
00:22:55,080 --> 00:22:57,320
Speaker 1: about people. And I was glad that Lauren la Rosso

524
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:58,600
Speaker 1: was with me at the time to hear that.

525
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:00,359
Speaker 3: I know when you said that to me, me this.

526
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:01,720
Speaker 3: I couldn't believe that she said that.

527
00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:03,040
Speaker 1: She absolutely said that, and I was like, what do

528
00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:04,520
Speaker 1: you mean like karma? And she was like, well, you

529
00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:07,720
Speaker 1: know God. I never heard when you mentioned God ever

530
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:08,320
Speaker 1: in my life.

531
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:09,800
Speaker 3: Don't you know that you've shared this story.

532
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:15,000
Speaker 1: I don't know. I have no idea. I haven't spoke.

533
00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:17,159
Speaker 1: She called me on my birthday over the summer, but

534
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:17,800
Speaker 1: I haven't spoken.

535
00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:19,640
Speaker 3: You guys were talking pretty frequently.

536
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:21,880
Speaker 1: I thought, yeah, she called me, she called me over

537
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:24,239
Speaker 1: on my birthday, but I haven't spoken her.

538
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:27,360
Speaker 3: Do you believe some of that, like about the karma about.

539
00:23:27,119 --> 00:23:30,680
Speaker 1: Like absolutely, I don't know. You know, the thing about karma,

540
00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:34,800
Speaker 1: Karma's funny, right, because I've seen some really bad things

541
00:23:34,840 --> 00:23:37,240
Speaker 1: happened to people that I thought was really good people,

542
00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:39,080
Speaker 1: and I still believe that they're good people. So I

543
00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:41,000
Speaker 1: don't believe in karma.

544
00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:42,760
Speaker 3: Like hapen to bad people.

545
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:45,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, I do something and then you get that, you know,

546
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:48,639
Speaker 1: type of equal opposite reaction back. I don't believe in

547
00:23:48,680 --> 00:23:51,360
Speaker 1: it in that way, but I do believe, like you know,

548
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:53,800
Speaker 1: you can curate the energy around you, and I think

549
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:55,760
Speaker 1: sometimes you know, if you put out put out a

550
00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:58,080
Speaker 1: lot a lot of negative energy, a lot of bad energy.

551
00:23:58,119 --> 00:24:00,439
Speaker 1: I think that you can find yourself while in that

552
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:02,159
Speaker 1: and not even realizing it.

553
00:24:03,119 --> 00:24:06,840
Speaker 2: How do you feel about forgiveness for that type of stuff?

554
00:24:06,920 --> 00:24:09,719
Speaker 2: Like you said you cut people off fast, right, But

555
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:11,320
Speaker 2: like even in that moment, even in the moment with

556
00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:14,040
Speaker 2: Wendy and her saying get and you having apologized to

557
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:20,800
Speaker 2: Kelly and just learning from that and she forgived you right, clearly, I.

558
00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:23,600
Speaker 3: Don't know, do you forgive yourself or do you forgive

559
00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:24,240
Speaker 3: other people?

560
00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:27,480
Speaker 2: Or do you just kind of cut people out like

561
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:29,520
Speaker 2: I would even imagine with Wendy there had to be

562
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:32,400
Speaker 2: some type of I don't know it is, but you know.

563
00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:35,120
Speaker 1: The thing with Wendy is like like earlier this year,

564
00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,359
Speaker 1: you know, we were helping her right because she was

565
00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:40,480
Speaker 1: in a bad situation. But then you know, you see

566
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:45,040
Speaker 1: some things that remind you of that old energy, and

567
00:24:45,080 --> 00:24:49,160
Speaker 1: you're like, I don't really want that in my life, No, lover,

568
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:52,879
Speaker 1: wish you the best, you know, glad we was able to,

569
00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:55,359
Speaker 1: you know, connect her with certain people. Then when you

570
00:24:55,359 --> 00:24:58,600
Speaker 1: see even how she might have treated to certain people

571
00:24:58,640 --> 00:25:01,200
Speaker 1: you connected it with, you know, so it's just like, eh,

572
00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:03,920
Speaker 1: let me, you know, I wish you the best, No

573
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:07,439
Speaker 1: want the best for her. But that was a season

574
00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:08,920
Speaker 1: in my life. And I always say people come into

575
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:11,600
Speaker 1: your life for you know, reasons, seasons, and you know

576
00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:14,919
Speaker 1: sometimes lifetimes. Those lifetime was are very rare, but you

577
00:25:14,920 --> 00:25:16,960
Speaker 1: know you appreciate the seasons and you know, move on

578
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:17,560
Speaker 1: to the next one.

579
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:19,879
Speaker 3: And it was influential to you, like it helped you.

580
00:25:21,200 --> 00:25:23,439
Speaker 1: Oh, man, I wouldn't be I probably wouldn't be in

581
00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:25,919
Speaker 1: the position I'm in now if it wasn't for that.

582
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:27,600
Speaker 1: And I don't even like to have those type of

583
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:31,719
Speaker 1: hypothetical conversations because the reality is I'm in the position

584
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:34,000
Speaker 1: I am because that was part of my journey coming

585
00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:36,640
Speaker 1: from South Carolina. I was in Columbia at the time.

586
00:25:36,640 --> 00:25:39,719
Speaker 1: I think Columbia's market number ninety three. To go from

587
00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:43,240
Speaker 1: market number ninety three to market number one. Being Wendy

588
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:47,159
Speaker 1: Williams co host like you who gets that kind of

589
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,040
Speaker 1: look like that's some stuff you see in a movie,

590
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:51,960
Speaker 1: you know, you watch on a TV show and be like, Yo,

591
00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:53,760
Speaker 1: that's damn near impossible.

592
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:56,040
Speaker 3: You would have probably done anything she told you to do, right.

593
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:03,760
Speaker 1: I was like, Yo, I did do damn anything you

594
00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:09,000
Speaker 1: told me to do? Like yes, yeah, I was. I

595
00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:11,720
Speaker 1: was her attack dog like not not only that, I

596
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:15,439
Speaker 1: was living with her, like living with them, like they

597
00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:17,320
Speaker 1: were giving me a place to stay. I wasn't getting paid.

598
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:18,840
Speaker 1: I didn't get paid for like a year and a half.

599
00:26:19,119 --> 00:26:20,560
Speaker 1: But I do that though, And that's why I always

600
00:26:20,600 --> 00:26:23,119
Speaker 1: tell you the next generation recognize opportunity when it's not

601
00:26:23,119 --> 00:26:25,760
Speaker 1: a pay check attached to it, because you can't put

602
00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:28,880
Speaker 1: a price on that kind of opportunity. Like it's like, Yo,

603
00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:30,840
Speaker 1: you want you up here to be her calls, but

604
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:34,080
Speaker 1: we can't pay you. All Right, I'm out. You know,

605
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:35,719
Speaker 1: I gotta take I gotta figure it out. Take that,

606
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:37,080
Speaker 1: take that first step. You know, if you don't see

607
00:26:37,080 --> 00:26:38,320
Speaker 1: the rest of the staircase.

608
00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:41,359
Speaker 3: To go back to the thing about you change your

609
00:26:41,359 --> 00:26:43,800
Speaker 3: life and your wife, what do you think? Why do

610
00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:47,800
Speaker 3: you think she hung in there with you?

611
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:49,760
Speaker 1: I have no idea that goes back to what you're

612
00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:52,840
Speaker 1: saying about the forgiveness, Like you don't always have to

613
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:54,639
Speaker 1: forgive people, And if you do forgive them, you can

614
00:26:54,680 --> 00:26:57,040
Speaker 1: still forgive them and move on and realize like, nah,

615
00:26:57,080 --> 00:27:00,200
Speaker 1: this person, that energy isn't for me like that, that's

616
00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:02,600
Speaker 1: the blessing, right, The blessing is when somebody forgives you

617
00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:06,040
Speaker 1: but they decide to still be in your life in

618
00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:08,280
Speaker 1: some way, shape or form. Like when somebody forgives you

619
00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:10,840
Speaker 1: and they're like, yeah, but that energy, I don't want

620
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:13,120
Speaker 1: that around me. That's that's when it's like, oh man,

621
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:16,199
Speaker 1: but you know, we've been together since we was kids,

622
00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:18,119
Speaker 1: Like you know, we've been I think, on top of

623
00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:23,240
Speaker 1: everything else, were actually friends, and so she knows me

624
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:26,320
Speaker 1: for real, for real, Like she knows my heart for real,

625
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:28,720
Speaker 1: for real. She knows who I am for real, for real.

626
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:32,520
Speaker 1: So she was able to say, Okay, you made some mistakes,

627
00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:34,920
Speaker 1: but let's see the best apology has changed behavior. Plus,

628
00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:37,879
Speaker 1: we was, I mean growing up together. It's not like

629
00:27:38,960 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 1: I was the only person, you know what I mean,

630
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:44,280
Speaker 1: Like she was in college. Every girl goes to college

631
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:46,040
Speaker 1: and goes through their whole phase and stuff like that.

632
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:49,119
Speaker 1: So it's just like it works, it works both ways,

633
00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:51,280
Speaker 1: you know. So that's just but.

634
00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:52,240
Speaker 3: We only know your story.

635
00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:54,280
Speaker 2: We know you were a bad husband at the beginning

636
00:27:54,320 --> 00:27:57,680
Speaker 2: because you self proclaimed bad husband.

637
00:27:57,119 --> 00:28:01,720
Speaker 1: But you know I was always a good boyfriend, right.

638
00:28:02,240 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 1: But then it's like, man, honestly, it was just living

639
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:13,720
Speaker 1: this new hip hop radio lifestyle, famous I remember talking

640
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:17,240
Speaker 1: to somebody one time and they told me that every

641
00:28:17,760 --> 00:28:21,639
Speaker 1: superhero is gonna try out their new superpowers, because there

642
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:23,680
Speaker 1: was like, you've never been that version of yourself. And

643
00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:27,400
Speaker 1: the person I'm talking about is a superstar, right, so

644
00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:30,920
Speaker 1: like you've never been this version of yourself, so you're

645
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:33,280
Speaker 1: going to try out your new superpowers. And I didn't

646
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 1: understand what he meant. It was actually Chris Rock, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah,

647
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:41,000
Speaker 1: And I remember him saying. I remember him just saying that.

648
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,760
Speaker 1: To me, was like every sounds like Chris. He was like,

649
00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:46,160
Speaker 1: every superhero's gonna try out their new superpowers because you've

650
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 1: never been this version of yourself, and there's gonna be

651
00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:50,760
Speaker 1: a lot of things that come at you that never

652
00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:53,080
Speaker 1: came at you before. And I remember, and I always

653
00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:54,880
Speaker 1: think about that, and I always think about this quote

654
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 1: from the Honorable Minutes to Lewis frare Count, Honor Minister

655
00:28:57,320 --> 00:29:01,920
Speaker 1: Louis fair Count said, when you see men fall, don't laugh.

656
00:29:02,680 --> 00:29:07,920
Speaker 1: Learn because the same things that tempted them on their

657
00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:10,600
Speaker 1: way up, that caused them to probably you know, have

658
00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:13,160
Speaker 1: these bad habits and vices, are the same temptations that

659
00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:15,840
Speaker 1: you are going to face as well. So It's like,

660
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 1: those are things that I constantly think about, Like you

661
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:21,120
Speaker 1: see great men fall, you know, and I'm gonna laugh

662
00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:22,320
Speaker 1: a little bit sometimes.

663
00:29:23,160 --> 00:29:24,320
Speaker 3: And you know what it is, and you're gonna call

664
00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:25,160
Speaker 3: them donkey of the day.

665
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:28,600
Speaker 1: Listen, and rubbing another man's not on your nipples is

666
00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:31,040
Speaker 1: kind of funny, right, That's that's pretty that's kind that's

667
00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:33,360
Speaker 1: pretty hysterical. But so I'm gonna laugh a little bit.

668
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,160
Speaker 1: But I'm also gonna learn from the situation.

669
00:29:35,520 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 3: What that situation?

670
00:29:37,160 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 1: Oh my god, man, I watched that documentary. I watched that.

671
00:29:40,120 --> 00:29:42,600
Speaker 1: I watched that documentary on an amazing day.

672
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:45,560
Speaker 3: You watch all four parts of all four.

673
00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:48,400
Speaker 1: Part I watched this. This was whatever they were taping this.

674
00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:50,440
Speaker 1: It was last week. It was last week Friday.

675
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:52,880
Speaker 3: I wasn't I wasn't expecting to talk about this today.

676
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:54,680
Speaker 3: But we should talk about it. I haven't. I rarely

677
00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:55,680
Speaker 3: talk about it. I don't know why.

678
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 2: I'm so conflicted about the whole you lived it. I

679
00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:02,160
Speaker 2: know which and I never had the best relationship with him.

680
00:30:02,640 --> 00:30:03,680
Speaker 2: People don't really know that.

681
00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 1: And and so we've had these conversations privately about the well, yes,

682
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:12,120
Speaker 1: about how you feel that darkness.

683
00:30:12,320 --> 00:30:14,520
Speaker 2: I feel darkness from him. Yes, I remember the clip too.

684
00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:18,320
Speaker 2: Were you telling him you felt the darkness? But I

685
00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:21,920
Speaker 2: did feel that darkness. And we never had the best relationship.

686
00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:25,560
Speaker 2: I tried sometimes just because of the proximity and because

687
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:28,200
Speaker 2: of our worlds, and and you could not not be

688
00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:34,120
Speaker 2: inspired in terms of uh work, ethic and what he's created.

689
00:30:34,160 --> 00:30:37,160
Speaker 1: You know, there was another side. So I tried, whether

690
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:40,280
Speaker 1: the things you heard or things you felt, things you experienced,

691
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:41,880
Speaker 1: combination of it.

692
00:30:41,880 --> 00:30:44,600
Speaker 2: All, combination of it all. I just personally just never

693
00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:48,120
Speaker 2: had we just never had. We knew each other, but

694
00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:50,000
Speaker 2: I just always kind of me too.

695
00:30:50,040 --> 00:30:52,720
Speaker 1: I never wanted to go to the parties, and never.

696
00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:54,360
Speaker 3: I don't think I I don't think I've ever been

697
00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:54,960
Speaker 3: to a party.

698
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:57,400
Speaker 2: I could I could totally be wrong, and somebody will

699
00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:58,720
Speaker 2: pull up a picture of me as some party that

700
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:00,760
Speaker 2: was says I don't remember, but I have no recollection.

701
00:31:00,920 --> 00:31:02,760
Speaker 1: But I feel the same way too, Like you know,

702
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:05,560
Speaker 1: I saw a person trying to try at one point

703
00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:07,760
Speaker 1: he did see that. Oh yeah, there's a video. I

704
00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:09,480
Speaker 1: don't know where it's at, but somebody took a video.

705
00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:12,680
Speaker 1: This is the first Revolt Music conference, and you know,

706
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:14,720
Speaker 1: me and Andre were super cool I love Andre like

707
00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:18,120
Speaker 1: and God blessed the death. And so I did the

708
00:31:18,120 --> 00:31:20,600
Speaker 1: first Revote Music conference because of Dre And so we

709
00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:23,360
Speaker 1: walked into the trailer and did he was sitting in

710
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 1: there and this was right after Kim pass and he

711
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:29,160
Speaker 1: was just like super down. And I remember he just

712
00:31:29,200 --> 00:31:30,600
Speaker 1: said to me, he goes, man, I like all the

713
00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:33,640
Speaker 1: conversations you'd be having about mental health and therapy and stuff,

714
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:37,400
Speaker 1: because you know, I realized I've never been happy. He

715
00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:39,240
Speaker 1: said that to me. It's like I realized I've never

716
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:42,880
Speaker 1: been happy. Wow, Like he said, never been happy. And

717
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:45,280
Speaker 1: so you know when I hear somebody doing that. And

718
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:47,440
Speaker 1: I also remember being at I was at the Potterhouse

719
00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:50,040
Speaker 1: one one time. It was the weekend of Bishop Tdjake's

720
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:53,720
Speaker 1: birthday party and he had a party that night and

721
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:55,600
Speaker 1: then the next day we all went to church. I mean,

722
00:31:55,640 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 1: I love Potthhouse. I watched them online, you know, Pastor

723
00:31:58,880 --> 00:32:02,560
Speaker 1: Torrey robertson Bishop tdjas and Saturday Jakes Roberts and so

724
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:05,840
Speaker 1: we in the church. And YO, when I say he

725
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:09,320
Speaker 1: was I don't know what was going what he was

726
00:32:09,480 --> 00:32:11,880
Speaker 1: had going on, but he was going through it. I mean,

727
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:14,840
Speaker 1: holy ghoes jumping up and down tears, and I just

728
00:32:14,880 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 1: remember looking at him like, but he's going through it,

729
00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:22,800
Speaker 1: so clearly he was trying right. So you know, I

730
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:27,480
Speaker 1: give I give everybody the opportunity to evolve, but that

731
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:29,920
Speaker 1: I'm not the universe, I'm not God. So it don't

732
00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:33,000
Speaker 1: matter what I think. You still got to deal with

733
00:32:33,040 --> 00:32:36,280
Speaker 1: whatever you was putting out there. And that's what's happening now.

734
00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's funny to even talk about it because I

735
00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:40,960
Speaker 2: don't know. I just like somebody asked me the other day,

736
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,280
Speaker 2: if I would interview Puff if he came out, would you.

737
00:32:45,120 --> 00:32:46,080
Speaker 3: I'd have to think about it.

738
00:32:46,080 --> 00:32:49,120
Speaker 2: It wouldn't be a younger me would say, of course,

739
00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 2: it's my job. Absolutely yes. Now I'd have to say

740
00:32:54,840 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 2: what kind of offering would that be to the world?

741
00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:59,960
Speaker 2: Would it be worth it for me? Do I want

742
00:32:59,960 --> 00:33:03,520
Speaker 2: to put myself in that noise? Can I do something

743
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:05,480
Speaker 2: really meaningful? You know, I'd have to ask myself some

744
00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:08,200
Speaker 2: questions like that. It's not just a yes, I'll do

745
00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:11,160
Speaker 2: it because because it'll be huge. I mean I say no,

746
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:12,480
Speaker 2: the huge things all the time.

747
00:33:12,800 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 1: That's what I love about you. I mean, you know,

748
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:17,440
Speaker 1: it is so funny. Debbie Brown, who's a great friend

749
00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:19,520
Speaker 1: of mine. That's my good sister. She literally said. She

750
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 1: texted me like two days ago and was like, yo,

751
00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:24,560
Speaker 1: because she loves Tupac like I'm talking about she's the

752
00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:27,800
Speaker 1: person that haunted me exactly. She she loves two BOC.

753
00:33:27,920 --> 00:33:30,320
Speaker 1: She was like, yo, Angie really needs to put out

754
00:33:30,360 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 1: the TAC audio Debbie Brown. Maybe it's time then, And

755
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:36,720
Speaker 1: I said to her, I said, well, you know, she

756
00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:39,120
Speaker 1: never wanted to put it out because you know, I

757
00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:40,840
Speaker 1: thought it would be inflammatory, right.

758
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:42,760
Speaker 2: I know, there's a rumor on the internet that Puff

759
00:33:42,880 --> 00:33:45,840
Speaker 2: somehow paid me for those tapes, Like I like, I

760
00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:47,760
Speaker 2: held those tapes for all those years so that Puff

761
00:33:47,800 --> 00:33:48,320
Speaker 2: could pay me.

762
00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:51,400
Speaker 3: It's absolutely there's zero truth to that but that but

763
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:53,200
Speaker 3: you're right, that's why. That's why I never did it.

764
00:33:53,240 --> 00:33:56,280
Speaker 3: And then now I think, for what is the point now?

765
00:33:56,280 --> 00:33:59,640
Speaker 2: There's nothing there that changes history or changes but I

766
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:00,720
Speaker 2: know people are interested.

767
00:34:00,800 --> 00:34:03,120
Speaker 1: So I think people want to break it down psychologically

768
00:34:03,120 --> 00:34:03,680
Speaker 1: because there's this.

769
00:34:03,960 --> 00:34:05,200
Speaker 3: Let's do it. You want to do it with me,

770
00:34:05,280 --> 00:34:05,960
Speaker 3: you want to do like.

771
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:08,600
Speaker 1: Oh that'd be amazing, Let's do it because she you

772
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:11,279
Speaker 1: know what it is. I think people we realized Pap

773
00:34:11,400 --> 00:34:13,200
Speaker 1: wasn't as crazy as people thought.

774
00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:14,280
Speaker 3: And also he was young.

775
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:15,319
Speaker 1: He was very young.

776
00:34:15,480 --> 00:34:18,840
Speaker 3: He hadn't gone through the Imagine Pac after therapy healed.

777
00:34:19,120 --> 00:34:20,799
Speaker 1: When you think that was it twenty four to twenty five?

778
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:22,640
Speaker 3: Yes, twenty four, So his.

779
00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:24,520
Speaker 1: Full frontal cortex wasn't even fully.

780
00:34:24,320 --> 00:34:25,000
Speaker 3: This is what I'm saying.

781
00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:29,120
Speaker 2: Imagine him going through how the other side of Charlotte Bae,

782
00:34:29,160 --> 00:34:31,040
Speaker 2: Imagine the other side of Pac what that would have

783
00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:33,560
Speaker 2: been I would see. Then then I look at the

784
00:34:33,600 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 2: tapes and I go, well, now that has meaning. If

785
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:38,000
Speaker 2: I release it in a way where it actually has

786
00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:41,160
Speaker 2: meaning and does something good for the world, I want

787
00:34:41,200 --> 00:34:42,879
Speaker 2: to just put it out so people could talk about

788
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:45,879
Speaker 2: it and have it on the internet for whatever reason.

789
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:48,239
Speaker 1: Question, because you actually have gotten to meet all of

790
00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:51,000
Speaker 1: these people that are mythical to us. Would Tupac have

791
00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:55,960
Speaker 1: evolved like Jay or would he evolve like fifty?

792
00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:57,720
Speaker 3: Like Jay? But different?

793
00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:07,520
Speaker 2: I see Tupac were having institutions, universities, programs, schools.

794
00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:11,919
Speaker 3: Yeah, I see him like a like. Well, Nipsey didn't

795
00:35:11,920 --> 00:35:14,080
Speaker 3: even get to become Nipsey the Nipsey that he would

796
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:14,359
Speaker 3: have been.

797
00:35:14,440 --> 00:35:17,439
Speaker 2: But in that kind of lane, I don't think he would.

798
00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:20,120
Speaker 2: He valued money from and I'm not speaking as somebody

799
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:23,720
Speaker 2: who knew him the best. I had, you know, one

800
00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:28,279
Speaker 2: amazing day with him and some small interactions other than that.

801
00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:30,439
Speaker 2: But I've analyzed him just like everybody else has.

802
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:33,239
Speaker 1: But he knew you well enough to say I wanted.

803
00:35:34,239 --> 00:35:35,879
Speaker 3: He didn't know me at all. He used to listen

804
00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:36,759
Speaker 3: to me when he was in jail.

805
00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:39,400
Speaker 2: That's why so of the people that he would be

806
00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:42,120
Speaker 2: listening to, he'd say, Wow, you, I respect you on

807
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:43,920
Speaker 2: the air. You never talked about me. You didn't say

808
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:45,800
Speaker 2: I've never heard you say anything that was not true.

809
00:35:46,440 --> 00:35:48,560
Speaker 2: And I thought if somebody would listen to me, it

810
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:50,520
Speaker 2: would be you. That's that was literally what he said

811
00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:52,200
Speaker 2: to me. And I was like shit in the middle

812
00:35:52,239 --> 00:35:54,799
Speaker 2: of this fuck But but you know it was the

813
00:35:54,840 --> 00:35:55,200
Speaker 2: young man.

814
00:35:55,239 --> 00:35:56,600
Speaker 1: I said, Okay, you had to do it.

815
00:35:56,640 --> 00:36:00,200
Speaker 3: I had to go do it. Yeah, So I did it.

816
00:36:00,239 --> 00:36:03,960
Speaker 1: But that's always been your super super power though, making

817
00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:08,160
Speaker 1: people comfortable. Yeah, and being being such a great listener.

818
00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:09,799
Speaker 1: I used to always tell you that, I'm like, Yo,

819
00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:12,520
Speaker 1: that's a skill I want. I want to skill skill.

820
00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:15,319
Speaker 1: I think I've developed it now a little bit, like

821
00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:17,560
Speaker 1: like like actually making people comfortable. It's like you know.

822
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:19,560
Speaker 1: I don't know if you've ever seen that. It's like

823
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:21,560
Speaker 1: this folk tale about the wind and the sun, and

824
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:23,880
Speaker 1: the wind and the sun had a battle about you

825
00:36:23,920 --> 00:36:27,520
Speaker 1: know who they could make take their jacket off, right,

826
00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 1: and this guy, this guy walking with a jacket on.

827
00:36:30,760 --> 00:36:32,239
Speaker 1: And so the wind goes first and the wind is

828
00:36:32,280 --> 00:36:34,520
Speaker 1: blowing all crazy, trying to blow the guy's jacket off

829
00:36:34,520 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 1: with the guy grabbed the jacket tighter and he's holding

830
00:36:37,040 --> 00:36:39,239
Speaker 1: on to it because the wind is blowing. But then

831
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 1: the sun came out in the sun. It's all, you know,

832
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:45,040
Speaker 1: high in the sky and it's radiating its beams and

833
00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:48,600
Speaker 1: it makes it making everything really hot. And the guy's like, oh,

834
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:50,440
Speaker 1: the guy takes his coat off, nickting, you know, the

835
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:52,960
Speaker 1: guy takes his shirt off. By the end of the story,

836
00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:54,960
Speaker 1: the guy's laying under the tree with like his boxes on,

837
00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:57,840
Speaker 1: like just sunbathing basically. So you know, I always like,

838
00:36:58,000 --> 00:37:01,520
Speaker 1: I'd rather be the sun, like you've always been the suns.

839
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:03,759
Speaker 3: Like the nicest compliment ever. Thank you the truth, Thank

840
00:37:03,800 --> 00:37:05,920
Speaker 3: you man. Would you interview puff right now? To go

841
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:09,680
Speaker 3: back to that question you ask me, I.

842
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:12,520
Speaker 1: Think we'd be doing them a disservice. And the reason

843
00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:16,719
Speaker 1: I say that is because he just still seem like

844
00:37:16,800 --> 00:37:19,960
Speaker 1: he's on the oh shit, And I look at it

845
00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:21,799
Speaker 1: like it's a few things that make me feel that way.

846
00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:25,719
Speaker 1: When the Cassie accuzations first came out, he denied him,

847
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:29,359
Speaker 1: and then the tape came out, so you can't deny that.

848
00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:32,239
Speaker 1: And then when you look at the documentary, you see

849
00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:35,800
Speaker 1: him still even trying to manipulate you know, the media

850
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:39,360
Speaker 1: and people up until he's even about to be in jail.

851
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:40,680
Speaker 1: And you know, I don't know if it's true that

852
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:44,040
Speaker 1: he sent fifty those flowers, but if you did that,

853
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:47,240
Speaker 1: it's like, yo, you're still thinking about all the wrong things,

854
00:37:47,280 --> 00:37:50,840
Speaker 1: and even watching the documentary, like he really cares about

855
00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:56,400
Speaker 1: being puff, like being that character puff, like having those trappings,

856
00:37:56,400 --> 00:37:59,600
Speaker 1: even more so than you know, accountability for what he did,

857
00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:03,160
Speaker 1: you know, going to jail. He just I care about

858
00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:07,160
Speaker 1: my image, and I think that if he comes out

859
00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 1: and he's still on that we'd be doing a disservice

860
00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 1: by putting cameras all back in his face.

861
00:38:10,719 --> 00:38:13,080
Speaker 2: That's so funny you say that that I do operate

862
00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:16,480
Speaker 2: in that way too, like I think because I'm always

863
00:38:16,480 --> 00:38:19,360
Speaker 2: looking like you know, I'm looking for the truth in somebody,

864
00:38:19,440 --> 00:38:21,200
Speaker 2: even if the truth is ugly, even if the truth

865
00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:23,400
Speaker 2: is uncomfortable. I want to just get to know you

866
00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:25,560
Speaker 2: and know why your truth is like that. But if

867
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:29,600
Speaker 2: I don't feel like somebody can do that, then why

868
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,080
Speaker 2: are we doing this? I agree, you know what I'm saying,

869
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:34,400
Speaker 2: Then why And that doesn't mean I won't talk to

870
00:38:34,440 --> 00:38:37,120
Speaker 2: bad people or people who've been through bad things, or

871
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:39,120
Speaker 2: people who sometimes are trying to still figure it out.

872
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:41,480
Speaker 2: I will because I think there's learning and all of that.

873
00:38:41,680 --> 00:38:44,560
Speaker 2: I think we can learn lessons from It's funny, oof

874
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 2: I should share this, but I just got a request

875
00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:50,080
Speaker 2: for Russell Simmons to do the pod.

876
00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:54,600
Speaker 1: I think you should do that one you do, yes,

877
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:59,280
Speaker 1: because I've always say Russell has a very interesting story.

878
00:38:59,320 --> 00:39:03,640
Speaker 1: And if Ussell is ever allowed to really talk freely

879
00:39:04,680 --> 00:39:07,520
Speaker 1: right like the way he talks behind the scenes, I

880
00:39:07,560 --> 00:39:12,040
Speaker 1: think it would bring a lot of clarity to I

881
00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,480
Speaker 1: thought he was living what you said earlier about them

882
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:16,640
Speaker 1: being so young and having all that money and that

883
00:39:16,760 --> 00:39:19,480
Speaker 1: power and you know that access to things like I

884
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:22,960
Speaker 1: think that could be a very teachable moment. And Russell

885
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:26,440
Speaker 1: is a person who's really willing to teach, like Russell

886
00:39:26,480 --> 00:39:28,480
Speaker 1: can tell you where he was wrong at Russell can

887
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:28,719
Speaker 1: tell you.

888
00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:31,600
Speaker 2: Where if that was the case, then that's absolutely something

889
00:39:31,600 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 2: I want to do. But that was that was But

890
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:35,520
Speaker 2: that is the questioning that I asked myself when I

891
00:39:35,560 --> 00:39:38,280
Speaker 2: get that message, is like, will he be honest?

892
00:39:38,360 --> 00:39:41,960
Speaker 3: Is there something to learn here? Is there accountability here?

893
00:39:42,200 --> 00:39:44,480
Speaker 2: Because I don't want to sit across with somebody and

894
00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:46,560
Speaker 2: I feel like you should be taking some accountability and

895
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:47,120
Speaker 2: they don't.

896
00:39:47,680 --> 00:39:48,359
Speaker 3: That could be weird.

897
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:50,239
Speaker 2: And also I feel like I would have to be

898
00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:54,000
Speaker 2: sensitive to other people's stories. You know, it's a sensitive

899
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:56,319
Speaker 2: conversation which I'd be willing to have if I felt

900
00:39:56,360 --> 00:40:00,200
Speaker 2: like ultimately the world is a better place for the conversation.

901
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:01,640
Speaker 3: I guess that's the bottom line, right.

902
00:40:01,840 --> 00:40:04,600
Speaker 1: I've always said that it needs to be a woman

903
00:40:04,680 --> 00:40:07,800
Speaker 1: who interviews somebody like Russell Simmons, and you'd be perfect

904
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:10,160
Speaker 1: because you that was you know, part of your era

905
00:40:10,239 --> 00:40:12,520
Speaker 1: as well. And then just the fact that when you

906
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:16,280
Speaker 1: hear his story, if he ever told like the story

907
00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:19,720
Speaker 1: like just I'm talking about everything from that whole era,

908
00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:24,000
Speaker 1: it is it's very teachable moments that you know would

909
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:27,239
Speaker 1: be coming from him and not through somebody making a

910
00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:30,359
Speaker 1: documentary about it right now, because like I said, did

911
00:40:30,360 --> 00:40:32,920
Speaker 1: he Doctor was a teachable moment as well. But you know,

912
00:40:32,960 --> 00:40:35,640
Speaker 1: you don't know what selatious and what's not. But his

913
00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:39,320
Speaker 1: story from his mouth, I think a lot of people

914
00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:39,839
Speaker 1: could learn.

915
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:43,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm leaning towards yes on that for that reason,

916
00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:47,239
Speaker 2: for those reasons alone. But you know, it's complicated. The

917
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:49,279
Speaker 2: world we're in as complicated right now. Sometimes you have

918
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:51,680
Speaker 2: the best intentions and you could have a great conversation

919
00:40:51,760 --> 00:40:54,600
Speaker 2: that is very meaningful to a group of people, and

920
00:40:54,640 --> 00:40:57,160
Speaker 2: then it takes legs of a life of its own

921
00:40:57,239 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 2: once you serve it up on a platter to the cesspool.

922
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:01,839
Speaker 1: Here's the thing, you know what I mean.

923
00:41:01,840 --> 00:41:04,000
Speaker 3: But you can't really operate out of fear to go.

924
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:06,640
Speaker 1: But I grew up in the era where Dona Hue

925
00:41:06,640 --> 00:41:10,239
Speaker 1: had the Grand Wizard of the KKK on like like

926
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:14,040
Speaker 1: people were going to the jail to interview Charles Manson,

927
00:41:14,680 --> 00:41:18,719
Speaker 1: Jeffrey Jeffrey Dama eight people, and people were interviewing him.

928
00:41:18,800 --> 00:41:20,560
Speaker 3: Would you interview Jeffrey Dahma?

929
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:24,880
Speaker 1: Yes, I mean probably, yeah, yeah, I probably would. You know,

930
00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:28,640
Speaker 1: Gail King had all Kelly artists like like I never

931
00:41:28,719 --> 00:41:31,759
Speaker 1: understood when when when that line in journalism was like,

932
00:41:32,719 --> 00:41:34,360
Speaker 1: just we're not doing that anymore. But I didn't. I

933
00:41:34,360 --> 00:41:36,319
Speaker 1: didn't grow up that way. I grew up watching these

934
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:39,960
Speaker 1: people interview these these folks, and you wanted to hear

935
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:42,600
Speaker 1: from them. I have interviewed murderers, and that's what I'm saying,

936
00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:44,200
Speaker 1: all types of folks.

937
00:41:44,280 --> 00:41:45,399
Speaker 3: Yeah, for sure, don't.

938
00:41:45,480 --> 00:41:46,920
Speaker 1: I don't see I wouldn't see that. I don't see

939
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:47,440
Speaker 1: the shuit with it.

940
00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:50,160
Speaker 3: Yeah. Do you say no to things for those type

941
00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:50,959
Speaker 3: of reasons ever?

942
00:41:52,080 --> 00:41:56,640
Speaker 1: Yes? Yeah, absolutely, because to your point, because of the

943
00:41:56,680 --> 00:41:59,759
Speaker 1: era that we live in now, and you know, sometimes

944
00:42:00,680 --> 00:42:03,359
Speaker 1: you don't you're not thinking about the person who's going

945
00:42:03,360 --> 00:42:06,600
Speaker 1: to be hurt. Yeah by this, I do.

946
00:42:06,880 --> 00:42:07,720
Speaker 3: That's my problem.

947
00:42:07,800 --> 00:42:08,080
Speaker 1: Yeah.

948
00:42:08,160 --> 00:42:10,960
Speaker 3: I think about the person that gets hurt all the time.

949
00:42:11,360 --> 00:42:13,600
Speaker 2: It's probably why I never you could tell Debbie, that's

950
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:16,160
Speaker 2: probably why I never put the POC tapes out, because

951
00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:17,960
Speaker 2: I think about the people that are going to get

952
00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:20,400
Speaker 2: hurt from that, even the people that are talked about

953
00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:20,960
Speaker 2: on the tape.

954
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:23,719
Speaker 3: The hell that that lands. Wow, I do think about that.

955
00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:25,320
Speaker 1: Have you ever gone back and list of those tapes

956
00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:28,120
Speaker 1: and su Yes? But so you know clearly you know

957
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:30,040
Speaker 1: what happened to everybody he talked about. I don't even

958
00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:30,960
Speaker 1: know who we talked about.

959
00:42:30,800 --> 00:42:33,320
Speaker 3: But yes, there's people who are no longer here.

960
00:42:33,520 --> 00:42:35,839
Speaker 2: Not just big I mean, there's people in the rap

961
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:39,799
Speaker 2: world who passed and he's talking about him, and not

962
00:42:39,880 --> 00:42:42,960
Speaker 2: in a way that's helpful to the world. It's just

963
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:44,520
Speaker 2: he was angry at the time. He was twenty four,

964
00:42:44,560 --> 00:42:47,399
Speaker 2: in the middle of a war, you know, an internal war,

965
00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:49,719
Speaker 2: like you know, so he's talking shit about everybody, this

966
00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:51,080
Speaker 2: one that is one, that's one of most.

967
00:42:50,920 --> 00:42:52,360
Speaker 3: People are not even here some you know.

968
00:42:52,520 --> 00:42:55,480
Speaker 2: So it's it's there's just some ugliness to it that

969
00:42:55,719 --> 00:42:57,839
Speaker 2: I don't even think would be representative of him at

970
00:42:57,840 --> 00:43:00,279
Speaker 2: this point. But it's not for me to say. I know,

971
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:01,879
Speaker 2: people really want it, so we'll figure it out. You'll

972
00:43:01,880 --> 00:43:02,480
Speaker 2: help me figure out.

973
00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:04,960
Speaker 1: Absolutely. That was Debbie's point. Debbie was like, yo, he

974
00:43:05,239 --> 00:43:08,880
Speaker 1: was paranoid, angry people, all those people just trying to

975
00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:09,359
Speaker 1: kill him.

976
00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:13,520
Speaker 2: And also, if I'm being really honest, it's like not amazing.

977
00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:16,560
Speaker 2: I was twenty it was like my first No, listen,

978
00:43:16,640 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 2: it's not it's not a seasoned, devolved Angie Martinez on

979
00:43:19,520 --> 00:43:22,000
Speaker 2: the radio. It's a brand new Angie Martinez on the radio.

980
00:43:22,320 --> 00:43:23,920
Speaker 2: There's not a lot of follow up questions.

981
00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:24,520
Speaker 1: How long is that?

982
00:43:24,760 --> 00:43:27,600
Speaker 2: It's not me really, it's about an hour and forty

983
00:43:27,680 --> 00:43:28,319
Speaker 2: or something like that.

984
00:43:28,360 --> 00:43:30,400
Speaker 1: Our forty of Tupac and Angie Martinez.

985
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:33,200
Speaker 2: Yes, but it's a baby Angie Martine.

986
00:43:33,760 --> 00:43:36,080
Speaker 3: We'll see you'll say, I'm gonna let you listen to it,

987
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:36,840
Speaker 3: and then we'll say.

988
00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:40,920
Speaker 1: Oh, yes, that's what I'm talking about. You've got that

989
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,000
Speaker 1: on cameras. Let me listen to it. I'll let you

990
00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:43,320
Speaker 1: hear it.

991
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:45,000
Speaker 3: You're gonna have to find it. No, I have, I

992
00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:48,040
Speaker 3: know where it is. I have, I haven't digitized.

993
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 1: I've always asked about that interview. Like even people that

994
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:52,880
Speaker 1: I know that you used to like go through your stuff.

995
00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:55,600
Speaker 2: We're talking about it because now all the comments of

996
00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:58,920
Speaker 2: this interview. Now, now the comments of our interview are

997
00:43:58,920 --> 00:44:00,279
Speaker 2: gonna say at.

998
00:44:00,239 --> 00:44:03,120
Speaker 1: Least but the people that people who work for you,

999
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:05,439
Speaker 1: they love you so they hold you down like a vault,

1000
00:44:05,440 --> 00:44:06,960
Speaker 1: they'd be like, I don't know, I don't know what's

1001
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:09,239
Speaker 1: on it. I don't know. I don't know.

1002
00:44:11,840 --> 00:44:13,920
Speaker 2: I also haven't told a lot of people or played

1003
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:16,880
Speaker 2: it for people. I really have kept it quiet.

1004
00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:19,719
Speaker 3: I don't trust people, even people that I love. I

1005
00:44:19,760 --> 00:44:24,440
Speaker 3: don't trust people to hold secrets ooh, because I think

1006
00:44:24,440 --> 00:44:27,560
Speaker 3: everybody has a best friend. Everybody has a best friend.

1007
00:44:27,600 --> 00:44:31,160
Speaker 3: Everybody has a small circle of people they confide in, even.

1008
00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:34,600
Speaker 2: If they mean well, even if I tell you something,

1009
00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:38,319
Speaker 2: I pride myself on being a vault like. You could

1010
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:40,200
Speaker 2: tell me something and say it's really important to me

1011
00:44:40,239 --> 00:44:44,440
Speaker 2: to not share this, and ninety nine point nine percent

1012
00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:46,799
Speaker 2: of the time I really won't because I value that

1013
00:44:47,160 --> 00:44:50,200
Speaker 2: so much. But I'm an idea. It's part of my like.

1014
00:44:50,239 --> 00:44:52,800
Speaker 2: I deeply value that. I don't know that most people

1015
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:53,799
Speaker 2: operate through the world now.

1016
00:44:53,840 --> 00:44:54,759
Speaker 1: I don't know how many people like that.

1017
00:44:54,760 --> 00:44:57,160
Speaker 3: My wife is like that, And so I think most

1018
00:44:57,200 --> 00:44:59,600
Speaker 3: times when you tell people things, they mean well, oh

1019
00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:01,560
Speaker 3: no I want tell nobody. Of course not, but you

1020
00:45:01,640 --> 00:45:03,560
Speaker 3: got a small circle of trusted people.

1021
00:45:03,760 --> 00:45:06,440
Speaker 2: And then those people all also have a small trust

1022
00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:09,160
Speaker 2: circle of trusted people. So I really keep a lot

1023
00:45:09,160 --> 00:45:12,440
Speaker 2: of things very close to the chest because unless it's

1024
00:45:12,440 --> 00:45:14,919
Speaker 2: something I'm comfortable knowing, which is a lot of things,

1025
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:15,920
Speaker 2: I don't hide a lot.

1026
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:17,120
Speaker 3: I don't have a lot of If.

1027
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:18,400
Speaker 1: I give you my word, I'm not gonna do it.

1028
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:20,200
Speaker 1: If I if you tell somebody, tell me something like

1029
00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:22,279
Speaker 1: you don't tell nobody? All right, all right, you're good

1030
00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:24,279
Speaker 1: at that. Yeah, because you if you actually tell me,

1031
00:45:24,320 --> 00:45:25,960
Speaker 1: not that, I'm like, I'm right, yeah.

1032
00:45:25,800 --> 00:45:27,279
Speaker 3: I believe that. I feel like I've told you things

1033
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:29,040
Speaker 3: before and it didn't it didn't move.

1034
00:45:29,160 --> 00:45:31,200
Speaker 1: Yeah. But plus also, who am I gonna tell? Like,

1035
00:45:31,200 --> 00:45:32,879
Speaker 1: like you know, we all know the gossip to share

1036
00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:36,360
Speaker 1: with certain people, Like that's what Andy Martinez told me,

1037
00:45:36,480 --> 00:45:39,759
Speaker 1: Like why why why do I care? Like you know

1038
00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:43,719
Speaker 1: what I mean, what's going on in your life? Exactly exactly?

1039
00:45:44,560 --> 00:45:46,320
Speaker 3: I kind of just committed to drop in the tapes.

1040
00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:47,399
Speaker 1: No, yes you did?

1041
00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:49,759
Speaker 3: Is that what just happens today?

1042
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:52,440
Speaker 2: That wasn't my plan today. Fuck, we really had to

1043
00:45:52,440 --> 00:45:54,360
Speaker 2: figure that out. Then let's talk about it later.

1044
00:45:54,280 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 1: Our forty it might be like an eight part documentary nowadays. Yeah.

1045
00:45:59,239 --> 00:46:01,960
Speaker 2: It makes me sad though in general, just because for

1046
00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:04,440
Speaker 2: the culture like we I feel like all our pillars

1047
00:46:04,440 --> 00:46:06,279
Speaker 2: are like I don't know.

1048
00:46:07,880 --> 00:46:08,759
Speaker 3: Yeah, it does.

1049
00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:10,440
Speaker 1: I think about that all the time. That's why whenever

1050
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:13,560
Speaker 1: I see people like Hove, I always be like, yo, man,

1051
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:14,920
Speaker 1: you know, I salute you.

1052
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,040
Speaker 3: So at every corner they try to chop them down.

1053
00:46:17,120 --> 00:46:19,440
Speaker 1: At every turn, But it don't matter. That plane is

1054
00:46:19,440 --> 00:46:22,720
Speaker 1: still landing with the wheels out. Yeah, you know that plane,

1055
00:46:22,840 --> 00:46:25,120
Speaker 1: And that's that's the point, Like you want your plane

1056
00:46:25,160 --> 00:46:27,080
Speaker 1: to land with the wheels.

1057
00:46:26,760 --> 00:46:29,799
Speaker 2: Out, right, do you feeling some of that what I

1058
00:46:29,800 --> 00:46:32,319
Speaker 2: don't know, just that pressure to be a pillar in

1059
00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:34,799
Speaker 2: that way, and well.

1060
00:46:35,239 --> 00:46:36,719
Speaker 1: Honestly, you just got to do the right thing, like

1061
00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:38,239
Speaker 1: that's like, that's what I was watching when I was

1062
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:39,960
Speaker 1: watching the doc last week. That's all I kept saying

1063
00:46:40,000 --> 00:46:41,800
Speaker 1: to myself, Like how hard is it to do the

1064
00:46:41,880 --> 00:46:45,240
Speaker 1: right thing like that? That that's either that's a choice.

1065
00:46:45,600 --> 00:46:49,520
Speaker 1: Our humans are more like animals than we want to,

1066
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:55,319
Speaker 1: you know, realize, meaning that a scorpion is a scorpion regardless, Right,

1067
00:46:55,360 --> 00:46:58,320
Speaker 1: it's going to sting you if you go into the jungle.

1068
00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:03,600
Speaker 1: The lion isn't more delicious. He's in the jungle, so

1069
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:05,040
Speaker 1: it's going to eat you, and you ain't got no

1070
00:47:05,080 --> 00:47:07,640
Speaker 1: business in the jungle. So sometimes I wonder about certain humans.

1071
00:47:07,680 --> 00:47:11,200
Speaker 1: I'm like, that just gotta be in you, Like those

1072
00:47:11,320 --> 00:47:16,279
Speaker 1: can't be conscious choices that you're making to be that way,

1073
00:47:16,400 --> 00:47:20,279
Speaker 1: Like you just might be innately wired like that. I

1074
00:47:20,360 --> 00:47:22,640
Speaker 1: know that I'm not innately wired, Like I ain't perfect,

1075
00:47:22,640 --> 00:47:25,799
Speaker 1: but I ain't them niggas, you know, not touching. But

1076
00:47:25,880 --> 00:47:27,919
Speaker 1: I'm just saying I'm not perfect, but I'm not that.

1077
00:47:28,120 --> 00:47:29,960
Speaker 1: So I just think sometimes that just gotta be.

1078
00:47:30,800 --> 00:47:33,759
Speaker 3: Like that in yours. It's like a ruthless.

1079
00:47:33,360 --> 00:47:35,600
Speaker 1: Yes, that gotta be in you, because I think the

1080
00:47:35,680 --> 00:47:38,640
Speaker 1: easiest thing to do is do right by people, you

1081
00:47:38,640 --> 00:47:42,160
Speaker 1: know what I mean, pay people with their old you know, hey,

1082
00:47:42,200 --> 00:47:44,640
Speaker 1: maybe don't hang this guy out the window. Like there's

1083
00:47:44,680 --> 00:47:48,200
Speaker 1: like there's certain ways that you, you know, you make choices.

1084
00:47:48,239 --> 00:47:50,759
Speaker 1: I think those are just either poor either really poor

1085
00:47:50,840 --> 00:47:52,600
Speaker 1: choices are just innately in people.

1086
00:47:52,800 --> 00:47:55,520
Speaker 2: I think a lot of it too, uh not to

1087
00:47:55,640 --> 00:47:58,320
Speaker 2: just not just puff, but like even just that time

1088
00:47:58,440 --> 00:48:01,000
Speaker 2: and some of our leaders and moguls at that time,

1089
00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:04,400
Speaker 2: they didn't have a lot, They didn't have the clarity

1090
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:09,040
Speaker 2: of therapy and healing and trauma.

1091
00:48:09,120 --> 00:48:10,000
Speaker 3: Nobody there was.

1092
00:48:10,040 --> 00:48:13,279
Speaker 2: Nobody was talking about trauma, Nobody was talking about any

1093
00:48:13,320 --> 00:48:13,560
Speaker 2: of that.

1094
00:48:13,680 --> 00:48:15,239
Speaker 3: It wasn't never a conversation.

1095
00:48:15,280 --> 00:48:18,759
Speaker 2: It's so common now as every podcast as an episode

1096
00:48:18,800 --> 00:48:22,480
Speaker 2: about some version of that. You have made great strides

1097
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:24,960
Speaker 2: and having us open this conversation even more.

1098
00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:26,640
Speaker 1: But I wouldn't about that too, though, because when I

1099
00:48:26,680 --> 00:48:28,640
Speaker 1: told my dad, when my dad started hearing me talk

1100
00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:32,360
Speaker 1: about me going to therapy and my experiences with anxiety

1101
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:35,200
Speaker 1: and depression twenty eighteen, he told me he was like, yo,

1102
00:48:35,239 --> 00:48:37,319
Speaker 1: I was going to therapy twenty three times a week,

1103
00:48:37,360 --> 00:48:38,399
Speaker 1: and you know, so.

1104
00:48:38,400 --> 00:48:40,160
Speaker 3: You think some people were doing it and not saying that.

1105
00:48:40,239 --> 00:48:42,200
Speaker 1: Yes, my dad told me he tried to kill himself

1106
00:48:42,200 --> 00:48:43,799
Speaker 1: back in the day. He was on tend He said

1107
00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:47,800
Speaker 1: ten to twelve different medications with his various mental health issues,

1108
00:48:47,840 --> 00:48:50,400
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I remember to tell her asking my mom, like, yo,

1109
00:48:50,440 --> 00:48:51,840
Speaker 1: did you know Dad was going through all that? And

1110
00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:53,680
Speaker 1: she was like, I just thought he was playing crazy

1111
00:48:53,680 --> 00:48:56,279
Speaker 1: to get a check, but he was really going through

1112
00:48:56,280 --> 00:48:58,840
Speaker 1: what he was going through, but he never shared that

1113
00:48:58,920 --> 00:49:02,360
Speaker 1: with anybody. I wonder how many people, actually, you know,

1114
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:04,840
Speaker 1: we're doing the work and didn't know they had issues,

1115
00:49:04,880 --> 00:49:05,840
Speaker 1: but just weren't telling.

1116
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:09,200
Speaker 2: Folks in hip hop culture, I don't definitely was not

1117
00:49:09,239 --> 00:49:12,000
Speaker 2: a conversation, and I would be really surprised if the

1118
00:49:12,040 --> 00:49:13,360
Speaker 2: majority of people were doing it.

1119
00:49:13,360 --> 00:49:14,440
Speaker 3: I don't think people were doing work.

1120
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:20,000
Speaker 2: I think people were running around with new power, new money, unhealed, reckless,

1121
00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:24,320
Speaker 2: fighting demons, with no kind of I'm not making excuses

1122
00:49:24,360 --> 00:49:26,319
Speaker 2: for anybody or anything at all, but I'm just saying

1123
00:49:26,320 --> 00:49:29,560
Speaker 2: it was a different time, and some people worked on

1124
00:49:29,600 --> 00:49:32,640
Speaker 2: it and became better, and maybe some people didn't.

1125
00:49:33,080 --> 00:49:34,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, listen, That's how I was. When I

1126
00:49:34,880 --> 00:49:36,680
Speaker 1: was sitting back watching that doc last week. Man, all

1127
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:40,000
Speaker 1: I kept thinking to myself was I don't want to

1128
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 1: be that, whatever that is. I don't even want that

1129
00:49:42,760 --> 00:49:44,960
Speaker 1: nowhere near me, Like I don't even want to be

1130
00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:47,520
Speaker 1: in that type of mix. But I don't put myself

1131
00:49:47,560 --> 00:49:49,280
Speaker 1: in that type of mix. I've never been an industry

1132
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:50,880
Speaker 1: tutionalized person.

1133
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:54,400
Speaker 2: I like going home, but you're also on a journey

1134
00:49:54,440 --> 00:49:57,000
Speaker 2: in a quest to be healthy. Absolutely, it's a different

1135
00:49:57,400 --> 00:50:00,719
Speaker 2: that in itself separates you from that situations.

1136
00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:03,080
Speaker 1: Absolutely. But I also was just thinking about when I

1137
00:50:03,160 --> 00:50:05,839
Speaker 1: was even younger, I don't want to hurt I've never

1138
00:50:05,880 --> 00:50:09,760
Speaker 1: wanted to hurt people. Have I unintentionally hurt people, of course,

1139
00:50:09,880 --> 00:50:12,880
Speaker 1: but I've never intentionally been like I'm going to hurt

1140
00:50:13,640 --> 00:50:17,120
Speaker 1: that person. Like that's never I've never had that in me,

1141
00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:19,680
Speaker 1: Like I never was that guy who could just but you.

1142
00:50:19,880 --> 00:50:22,760
Speaker 3: Weren't a place where you didn't care if you hurt somebody, Well, I.

1143
00:50:22,600 --> 00:50:23,640
Speaker 1: I was in a place of survival.

1144
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:24,040
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1145
00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:25,719
Speaker 1: And I always say you can't judge people for what

1146
00:50:25,719 --> 00:50:27,480
Speaker 1: they're trying to do when they're in survival mode. Like

1147
00:50:27,520 --> 00:50:31,200
Speaker 1: I was literally just trying to survive, you know. Like

1148
00:50:31,440 --> 00:50:33,520
Speaker 1: when I first got back to New York, you gotta think, man,

1149
00:50:33,520 --> 00:50:35,960
Speaker 1: I had just been fired four times from radio. I

1150
00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:38,319
Speaker 1: just came off, you know, living with my mom at

1151
00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:41,960
Speaker 1: thirty one, thirty two years old. My now wife was

1152
00:50:42,040 --> 00:50:44,280
Speaker 1: back home living with her parents. You know, our daughter

1153
00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:47,680
Speaker 1: was like one or two. I just collected my last

1154
00:50:47,760 --> 00:50:51,520
Speaker 1: unemployment check the week I drove back up to New York,

1155
00:50:51,760 --> 00:50:54,200
Speaker 1: you know, to start doing Breakfast Club. I was not

1156
00:50:54,520 --> 00:50:56,880
Speaker 1: going back home. I was not trying to feel that

1157
00:50:57,000 --> 00:50:58,920
Speaker 1: in any way, shape or form. So in that moment,

1158
00:50:59,160 --> 00:51:04,000
Speaker 1: anybody could get it, like literally anybody could. Well, no,

1159
00:51:04,080 --> 00:51:07,120
Speaker 1: this was after this is a breakfast club. Yes, but

1160
00:51:07,239 --> 00:51:09,880
Speaker 1: Wendy was Wendy was. I love that because those are

1161
00:51:09,880 --> 00:51:11,799
Speaker 1: different lessons from life, right that. What I learned from

1162
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:16,040
Speaker 1: Windy was don't compromise yourself for a position. What I

1163
00:51:16,080 --> 00:51:18,920
Speaker 1: learned from Breakfast Club was don't judge anybody for what

1164
00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:21,840
Speaker 1: they do while they're in survival mode because I was

1165
00:51:21,920 --> 00:51:23,960
Speaker 1: just literally trying to survive.

1166
00:51:24,719 --> 00:51:27,000
Speaker 3: I mean, thank god you made it out pretty unscathed.

1167
00:51:28,280 --> 00:51:29,759
Speaker 1: I guess you don't think.

1168
00:51:29,800 --> 00:51:31,759
Speaker 3: I mean, you're flourishing, your skin looks great, you know

1169
00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:32,080
Speaker 3: what I mean.

1170
00:51:32,160 --> 00:51:34,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that took work, you know. But but you know,

1171
00:51:34,560 --> 00:51:37,240
Speaker 1: so that's such a that's such a great comment because

1172
00:51:38,719 --> 00:51:43,759
Speaker 1: what people thought was success wasn't success to me, which

1173
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:45,799
Speaker 1: is also the mind fuck, right, because this is what

1174
00:51:45,880 --> 00:51:48,280
Speaker 1: you said you wanted, right, Like you said you wanted

1175
00:51:48,320 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 1: all of this, But if you are doing it, if

1176
00:51:51,160 --> 00:51:53,160
Speaker 1: you get it and you're not happy, like I know,

1177
00:51:53,239 --> 00:51:56,080
Speaker 1: I'm not doing right by you know, my wife, right,

1178
00:51:56,200 --> 00:51:58,480
Speaker 1: I know that a lot of the anxiety comes from

1179
00:51:58,560 --> 00:52:01,000
Speaker 1: this line. And I'm living like you know, like I said,

1180
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:03,160
Speaker 1: going home, laying next to her, acting like everything is

1181
00:52:03,200 --> 00:52:05,879
Speaker 1: all good. But you know, another business trip this weekend,

1182
00:52:05,920 --> 00:52:07,560
Speaker 1: even though it was actual business trip. But it's what

1183
00:52:07,640 --> 00:52:10,279
Speaker 1: you do amongst the business. Our business is different, you know,

1184
00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:12,520
Speaker 1: as you know. So it's just like you can have

1185
00:52:12,600 --> 00:52:17,480
Speaker 1: all of that and not be happy internally. So is

1186
00:52:17,480 --> 00:52:20,480
Speaker 1: it really success? No? Not to me. I don't care

1187
00:52:20,560 --> 00:52:22,440
Speaker 1: what you know, you got in your pocket. And at

1188
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:23,879
Speaker 1: the time I was making more money than I ever

1189
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 1: made in my life. Like you know, breakfast club is booming,

1190
00:52:26,760 --> 00:52:32,279
Speaker 1: you know, great things are happening professionally, but personally, I'm like, yo,

1191
00:52:32,640 --> 00:52:36,479
Speaker 1: who am I? And her being the person that knows

1192
00:52:36,480 --> 00:52:39,680
Speaker 1: me better than anybody on this planet? Who are you

1193
00:52:40,680 --> 00:52:43,040
Speaker 1: like that? Would I remember one moment in particular, getting

1194
00:52:43,080 --> 00:52:45,200
Speaker 1: that phone call, you know, early in the morning when

1195
00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:47,200
Speaker 1: you ain't you know, you in La she on these

1196
00:52:47,239 --> 00:52:50,040
Speaker 1: coast times, so it's three to are but six something

1197
00:52:50,160 --> 00:52:54,680
Speaker 1: over here, and you getting that call and that woman's intuition,

1198
00:52:55,520 --> 00:53:00,280
Speaker 1: what are you doing? I'm sleeping? What are you doing?

1199
00:53:02,040 --> 00:53:04,040
Speaker 1: I'm sleeping? No, what are you doing with your life?

1200
00:53:04,280 --> 00:53:08,399
Speaker 1: Because you're about to lose everything? Motherfucker? Okay, starting with us.

1201
00:53:08,440 --> 00:53:11,239
Speaker 3: Like, oh you believe that?

1202
00:53:12,800 --> 00:53:17,040
Speaker 1: That was like that God moment, Like oh yeah, like

1203
00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:18,880
Speaker 1: you know you can get that God will show you

1204
00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:22,520
Speaker 1: these signs, and sometimes those signs are very direct, right,

1205
00:53:22,960 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 1: and you can choose to ignore them and think that

1206
00:53:25,560 --> 00:53:27,759
Speaker 1: you can continue to fly close to the sun or

1207
00:53:28,040 --> 00:53:30,279
Speaker 1: continue to think that you bigger than the program, and

1208
00:53:30,320 --> 00:53:33,760
Speaker 1: you will be humbled, you know, very very very very quick.

1209
00:53:33,840 --> 00:53:35,800
Speaker 1: So that was one of those moments.

1210
00:53:35,600 --> 00:53:38,000
Speaker 3: You must worship her forgetting.

1211
00:53:38,560 --> 00:53:40,439
Speaker 1: The worship the ground she walks on all the time.

1212
00:53:40,680 --> 00:53:42,759
Speaker 1: I say, I say that to her in some way,

1213
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:46,439
Speaker 1: shape or form every day, like literally every day, because

1214
00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:48,200
Speaker 1: I think that, you know what the Bible is right,

1215
00:53:48,200 --> 00:53:51,279
Speaker 1: when a man finds a good wife, he finds a

1216
00:53:51,320 --> 00:53:56,440
Speaker 1: great thing. And like that woman can be all things

1217
00:53:56,480 --> 00:53:58,800
Speaker 1: to you in a matter of moments. And I literally

1218
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:00,960
Speaker 1: so I literally said this to her last night. It's

1219
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:06,080
Speaker 1: like I watched her in the kitchen and it was dinner.

1220
00:54:06,680 --> 00:54:09,719
Speaker 1: Then I ate, and then I had like a cut

1221
00:54:09,760 --> 00:54:12,440
Speaker 1: on my back and she's upstairs and she put the

1222
00:54:12,480 --> 00:54:15,080
Speaker 1: ointment on and put the band aid on, and then

1223
00:54:15,120 --> 00:54:17,359
Speaker 1: I was, you know, being funny with her, and I'm

1224
00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:19,440
Speaker 1: just like, yo, you were this in the kitchen. You

1225
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:22,080
Speaker 1: were you know this when you put the ointment on,

1226
00:54:22,360 --> 00:54:24,800
Speaker 1: and then if we wanted to, you could be the

1227
00:54:24,800 --> 00:54:26,080
Speaker 1: freak right now. And I was just like, yo, the

1228
00:54:26,120 --> 00:54:28,919
Speaker 1: women are so multi dimensional, it's amazing. I literally said

1229
00:54:28,960 --> 00:54:31,319
Speaker 1: this to her last night, Like women can be so

1230
00:54:31,440 --> 00:54:35,080
Speaker 1: multi dimensional that it's amazing, and like that is a

1231
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:37,880
Speaker 1: blessing for a man to have, and it's not something

1232
00:54:37,880 --> 00:54:40,720
Speaker 1: that I take for granted in any way, shape or form.

1233
00:54:40,800 --> 00:54:44,279
Speaker 3: That's beautiful it's just the truth. Look at you. What

1234
00:54:44,440 --> 00:54:45,640
Speaker 3: makes a good husband.

1235
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:48,719
Speaker 1: I'm still learning that. I'm still figuring that out. Like

1236
00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:51,399
Speaker 1: I don't think that that's something that you. I don't

1237
00:54:51,400 --> 00:54:54,319
Speaker 1: know if that's something you ever really truly figure out,

1238
00:54:54,320 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 1: because I think every day of your life you gotta

1239
00:54:56,239 --> 00:54:59,360
Speaker 1: wake up and set your intention and say, yo, I

1240
00:54:59,400 --> 00:55:01,040
Speaker 1: want to be a great husband. And you know, every

1241
00:55:01,080 --> 00:55:03,280
Speaker 1: day you're not gonna get it right. Same thing with fatherhood.

1242
00:55:03,280 --> 00:55:06,000
Speaker 1: You're not gonna get fatherhood right. You know, every day

1243
00:55:06,040 --> 00:55:07,160
Speaker 1: because there's no manual.

1244
00:55:08,520 --> 00:55:10,800
Speaker 2: We don't know you much as a father in the public,

1245
00:55:10,920 --> 00:55:13,400
Speaker 2: like you've been very kind of I mean, you share

1246
00:55:13,440 --> 00:55:20,160
Speaker 2: stories and lessons, but you've been very intentional about having

1247
00:55:20,200 --> 00:55:20,880
Speaker 2: boundaries in that.

1248
00:55:21,040 --> 00:55:23,960
Speaker 1: Oh absolutely, yeah, absolutely, just because I feel like, you know,

1249
00:55:24,440 --> 00:55:27,120
Speaker 1: they didn't sign up for any of this, you know

1250
00:55:27,160 --> 00:55:30,120
Speaker 1: what I mean, And I just I don't feel like them.

1251
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:31,600
Speaker 1: I don't want them to have to deal with any

1252
00:55:31,640 --> 00:55:36,080
Speaker 1: of that type of scrutiny. Yeah, you know, but my

1253
00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:39,879
Speaker 1: oldest is seventeen. Wow, she thinks I'm just a ridiculous person.

1254
00:55:39,920 --> 00:55:44,239
Speaker 1: She don't take me seriously any way, shape or formed. Like,

1255
00:55:44,320 --> 00:55:46,200
Speaker 1: she really does not take me serious. She tells me

1256
00:55:46,239 --> 00:55:50,000
Speaker 1: every day. I'm not funny, Like literally every day. You're

1257
00:55:50,040 --> 00:55:52,640
Speaker 1: not funny. You think you's so funny, but you're not funny.

1258
00:55:52,680 --> 00:55:55,840
Speaker 1: Oh nah, she's a very I got a very humbling

1259
00:55:55,880 --> 00:55:59,399
Speaker 1: seventeen year old because she's like very stoic. And she's

1260
00:55:59,400 --> 00:56:03,239
Speaker 1: a cancer too, so I know she shows her emotions

1261
00:56:03,280 --> 00:56:06,120
Speaker 1: in different ways. But you know, cancers have that hard

1262
00:56:06,160 --> 00:56:09,840
Speaker 1: outside shell and then that soft interior like the crab,

1263
00:56:09,880 --> 00:56:12,000
Speaker 1: and that's that's how she is.

1264
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:14,520
Speaker 3: Yep, Charlotta made the Dad.

1265
00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:18,640
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1266
00:56:18,880 --> 00:56:20,719
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1294
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1295
00:57:31,200 --> 00:57:36,920
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1296
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1297
00:57:39,920 --> 00:57:43,320
Speaker 2: gambling and Florida, call one eight eight eight admitted in Indiana.

1298
00:57:43,400 --> 00:57:45,440
Speaker 2: If you are someone you know has a gambling problem

1299
00:57:45,440 --> 00:57:47,920
Speaker 2: and wants help, call one eight hundred and nine with

1300
00:57:48,080 --> 00:57:52,680
Speaker 2: it gambling problem called one eight hundred gambler in Arizona, Colorado, Illinois,

1301
00:57:52,760 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 2: New Jersey, Ohio, Tennessee, Virginia.

1302
00:57:55,200 --> 00:57:58,440
Speaker 3: By the way, I love that user. This fare now

1303
00:57:58,480 --> 00:58:00,040
Speaker 3: the festival, the Mental Health.

1304
00:58:00,080 --> 00:58:02,720
Speaker 1: Well, it's a mental health expo. The expo. Yeah, we

1305
00:58:02,760 --> 00:58:07,320
Speaker 1: do the Mental Health Expo every every October around World

1306
00:58:07,360 --> 00:58:09,960
Speaker 1: Mental Health Day. And you know, I have an organization

1307
00:58:10,000 --> 00:58:12,400
Speaker 1: called the Mental Wealth Alliance and it's a nonprofit and

1308
00:58:12,440 --> 00:58:14,760
Speaker 1: you know, our goal is to get ten million people

1309
00:58:14,800 --> 00:58:17,720
Speaker 1: free therapy over the next you know, five years. And

1310
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:21,320
Speaker 1: you know, we want to increase the amount of black

1311
00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:25,080
Speaker 1: and brown mental health professionals because I think, oh, yes,

1312
00:58:25,120 --> 00:58:28,560
Speaker 1: black people only make up like four percent is that right, Yeah,

1313
00:58:28,600 --> 00:58:30,640
Speaker 1: of all mental health professionals. So I want to get

1314
00:58:30,640 --> 00:58:33,640
Speaker 1: it to at least reflect the population of black people

1315
00:58:33,680 --> 00:58:36,080
Speaker 1: in this country. So we got we got like actual

1316
00:58:36,160 --> 00:58:38,360
Speaker 1: goals and mission statements that we want to do. And

1317
00:58:38,440 --> 00:58:40,240
Speaker 1: you know, dev is nuts. He's on the board of

1318
00:58:40,280 --> 00:58:42,480
Speaker 1: that and we have some like really big plans for

1319
00:58:42,520 --> 00:58:43,520
Speaker 1: next year, Like I want to.

1320
00:58:43,880 --> 00:58:45,760
Speaker 2: I love that you're doing that because I remember after

1321
00:58:45,800 --> 00:58:47,920
Speaker 2: my car accident, right and you were one of the

1322
00:58:48,080 --> 00:58:50,200
Speaker 2: I was looking for somebody to help me with some

1323
00:58:50,240 --> 00:58:53,720
Speaker 2: PTSD and I called you because you had just you

1324
00:58:53,760 --> 00:58:57,040
Speaker 2: had been doing so much work and advocate for therapy

1325
00:58:57,240 --> 00:58:58,080
Speaker 2: and mental health.

1326
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:00,680
Speaker 3: And I was like, hey, look for a PTS. Do

1327
00:59:00,680 --> 00:59:04,720
Speaker 3: you remember this star call some PTSD work?

1328
00:59:05,160 --> 00:59:09,760
Speaker 2: And then I realized, Wow, if I'm calling him, everybody

1329
00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:10,720
Speaker 2: must be calling you.

1330
00:59:10,800 --> 00:59:13,440
Speaker 1: Oh man, like everybody must be like you. Probably like

1331
00:59:13,560 --> 00:59:15,040
Speaker 1: rappers all music.

1332
00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:16,640
Speaker 3: COVID.

1333
00:59:16,800 --> 00:59:21,840
Speaker 1: During COVID, every rapper in the world was reaching out,

1334
00:59:21,960 --> 00:59:25,520
Speaker 1: and it was It was funny to me because I

1335
00:59:25,520 --> 00:59:27,960
Speaker 1: remember one rapper in particular reached out. He's like, man,

1336
00:59:27,960 --> 00:59:29,960
Speaker 1: I'm just realizing I got angry ishoes and I'm like,

1337
00:59:30,520 --> 00:59:35,520
Speaker 1: you you just realizing your house. I write the name down,

1338
00:59:35,520 --> 00:59:40,160
Speaker 1: I write the name down, you like you are just

1339
00:59:40,200 --> 00:59:42,600
Speaker 1: realizing that. And I was like, he was like, yeah,

1340
00:59:42,600 --> 00:59:43,080
Speaker 1: I really want to.

1341
00:59:43,040 --> 00:59:45,840
Speaker 2: See Oh god, you don't even have to finish it.

1342
00:59:48,200 --> 00:59:49,760
Speaker 1: And he was like, I really want to sit down

1343
00:59:49,760 --> 00:59:52,080
Speaker 1: and you know, just talk to somebody. But I was

1344
00:59:52,120 --> 00:59:54,000
Speaker 1: just like but that was It was just mind boggling

1345
00:59:54,000 --> 00:59:56,080
Speaker 1: to me because COVID was the time where all of

1346
00:59:56,160 --> 00:59:58,400
Speaker 1: us had to be still and some of us were

1347
00:59:58,400 --> 01:00:00,880
Speaker 1: really seeing each other for the first time, seeing ourselves

1348
01:00:01,320 --> 01:00:02,960
Speaker 1: for the first time, and a lot of us didn't

1349
01:00:03,000 --> 01:00:06,040
Speaker 1: like what we saw. But that during COVID, every I

1350
01:00:06,080 --> 01:00:09,360
Speaker 1: promise you this felt like every rapper was reaching out,

1351
01:00:09,480 --> 01:00:11,320
Speaker 1: looking to talk, wanting to talk to somebody.

1352
01:00:11,040 --> 01:00:13,439
Speaker 3: And finally, the good therapist is really hard, very hard.

1353
01:00:13,560 --> 01:00:16,320
Speaker 3: So coming to you, so people in their like vulnerable

1354
01:00:16,360 --> 01:00:17,680
Speaker 3: state coming to you.

1355
01:00:19,040 --> 01:00:23,320
Speaker 2: Must feel I don't know, not like a burden but responsibilities.

1356
01:00:24,560 --> 01:00:26,840
Speaker 1: It honestly felt good because it felt good that I

1357
01:00:26,880 --> 01:00:28,640
Speaker 1: was able to point people in the direction like, hey,

1358
01:00:28,640 --> 01:00:30,480
Speaker 1: you should go talk to this person, right, this is

1359
01:00:30,520 --> 01:00:32,400
Speaker 1: a good person that you that you should sit down

1360
01:00:32,440 --> 01:00:32,760
Speaker 1: and talk to.

1361
01:00:32,960 --> 01:00:35,520
Speaker 3: How many good therapists are that you can recommend, like, I.

1362
01:00:36,040 --> 01:00:38,880
Speaker 1: Know a lot. Yeah, because because of this conversation, the

1363
01:00:38,880 --> 01:00:41,920
Speaker 1: conversations that I've was having around my own you know,

1364
01:00:42,040 --> 01:00:44,160
Speaker 1: mental health issues, and you know the work that I've

1365
01:00:44,200 --> 01:00:46,400
Speaker 1: been doing in the last decade in the space, I

1366
01:00:46,480 --> 01:00:49,800
Speaker 1: know some really good ones, from doctor Rita Walker to

1367
01:00:49,880 --> 01:00:53,120
Speaker 1: doctor Alfred Breeland, Noble, the guys like doctor j Barnett,

1368
01:00:53,400 --> 01:00:55,560
Speaker 1: you know, Elliott Connie. Then there's people that they can

1369
01:00:55,600 --> 01:00:59,880
Speaker 1: talk to like Jason Wilson, Like, there's so many fantastic,

1370
01:01:00,360 --> 01:01:02,160
Speaker 1: you know people in this space.

1371
01:01:02,280 --> 01:01:04,680
Speaker 3: What is your number one advice for somebody who's never

1372
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:08,280
Speaker 3: done therapy and looking to start doing some work on themselves.

1373
01:01:08,360 --> 01:01:10,479
Speaker 1: Don't don't give up just because you go there, because

1374
01:01:10,480 --> 01:01:12,280
Speaker 1: it's not like you go there and have one conversation

1375
01:01:12,360 --> 01:01:16,120
Speaker 1: and then your everything's fixed, your heels. You know, healing

1376
01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:19,280
Speaker 1: is a constant process, right, and you should, you know,

1377
01:01:19,440 --> 01:01:21,600
Speaker 1: just take it. Takes a It takes a while to

1378
01:01:21,640 --> 01:01:23,960
Speaker 1: really start unpacking. Like I know, I probably lied to

1379
01:01:24,000 --> 01:01:26,080
Speaker 1: my first therapist a lot.

1380
01:01:26,480 --> 01:01:28,600
Speaker 3: Lying to the therapist is crazy.

1381
01:01:28,600 --> 01:01:30,640
Speaker 1: But I just know I probably was like because you're

1382
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:33,880
Speaker 1: kind of telling her like have truth, your version, your

1383
01:01:34,240 --> 01:01:37,280
Speaker 1: your verse. Yes, your version. Hey, that's the perfect way.

1384
01:01:37,160 --> 01:01:39,520
Speaker 3: Because we lie to ourselves, so that's right. So you're

1385
01:01:39,560 --> 01:01:41,200
Speaker 3: telling the therapists your version.

1386
01:01:42,760 --> 01:01:45,480
Speaker 2: It takes time for them to that's right, and then

1387
01:01:45,520 --> 01:01:48,080
Speaker 2: they be like slow walking you sometimes because they want

1388
01:01:48,160 --> 01:01:49,240
Speaker 2: you to get to the truth.

1389
01:01:49,320 --> 01:01:51,960
Speaker 3: So don't always tell you that annoys me about therapists.

1390
01:01:51,960 --> 01:01:53,680
Speaker 3: I like a therapist to get to it. I'd be like,

1391
01:01:54,840 --> 01:01:55,720
Speaker 3: tell me what you see.

1392
01:01:55,800 --> 01:01:58,200
Speaker 1: And some people you just don't. You might not feel

1393
01:01:58,240 --> 01:02:00,200
Speaker 1: super comfortable opening up to. You might just go to

1394
01:02:00,280 --> 01:02:01,920
Speaker 1: the therapist and feel like, Okay, I know I'm supposed

1395
01:02:01,960 --> 01:02:03,520
Speaker 1: to talk to this person, so let me talk. But

1396
01:02:03,560 --> 01:02:08,520
Speaker 1: I'm not, you know, being completely completely honest about everything.

1397
01:02:08,600 --> 01:02:12,120
Speaker 1: So what good is that really? You know? Doing you?

1398
01:02:12,520 --> 01:02:14,240
Speaker 1: That's why I said when I when I did ayahuasca,

1399
01:02:14,280 --> 01:02:16,840
Speaker 1: I had was that it was incredible. I did it

1400
01:02:17,080 --> 01:02:17,720
Speaker 1: two years ago.

1401
01:02:17,800 --> 01:02:21,080
Speaker 3: No fear. I have fear because I feel like, could

1402
01:02:21,080 --> 01:02:22,000
Speaker 3: it mess with your brain?

1403
01:02:22,120 --> 01:02:24,840
Speaker 1: Like I had fear the first day? But the first

1404
01:02:24,880 --> 01:02:27,240
Speaker 1: day and told me everything was gonna be fine. It

1405
01:02:27,320 --> 01:02:31,520
Speaker 1: told you, oh yes, like that spirit mother ayah God,

1406
01:02:31,520 --> 01:02:34,440
Speaker 1: I don't know what you call it, but it's really

1407
01:02:35,160 --> 01:02:38,160
Speaker 1: talking to you, like it's really like I can't even

1408
01:02:38,160 --> 01:02:41,480
Speaker 1: say voices in your head, like you're having full blown

1409
01:02:41,600 --> 01:02:45,800
Speaker 1: conversations with this spirit, with this entity, and this spirit

1410
01:02:45,960 --> 01:02:49,600
Speaker 1: is willing to show you whatever you're willing to look at,

1411
01:02:49,720 --> 01:02:53,280
Speaker 1: and once you're there with it, it's not going to

1412
01:02:53,360 --> 01:02:55,160
Speaker 1: let you look away. Like you know how sometimes you

1413
01:02:55,200 --> 01:02:57,760
Speaker 1: have those glimpses of things, like you try to suppress

1414
01:02:57,760 --> 01:03:00,520
Speaker 1: in your mind. It's like no, yes, look at this

1415
01:03:00,800 --> 01:03:04,080
Speaker 1: look and you're gonna you're gonna have to deal with it.

1416
01:03:04,120 --> 01:03:06,000
Speaker 1: And I remember I did. I did a three day,

1417
01:03:07,000 --> 01:03:09,320
Speaker 1: three day retreat. So on the second day is when

1418
01:03:09,760 --> 01:03:12,000
Speaker 1: it like really kicked my ass. And that's when I

1419
01:03:12,040 --> 01:03:14,640
Speaker 1: came up with the whole concept of you know, stop

1420
01:03:14,720 --> 01:03:17,520
Speaker 1: lying to yourself and stop volunteering those lives to other people.

1421
01:03:17,920 --> 01:03:20,040
Speaker 1: And that's when the whole book get honest or get

1422
01:03:20,120 --> 01:03:21,760
Speaker 1: honest or die lying. And that's when I was like,

1423
01:03:22,200 --> 01:03:25,360
Speaker 1: you know, either you're going to be all the way

1424
01:03:26,000 --> 01:03:28,919
Speaker 1: honest about these experiences and these things that you've gone through,

1425
01:03:29,360 --> 01:03:31,959
Speaker 1: are you know, we're gonna have to figure something else out.

1426
01:03:32,320 --> 01:03:34,480
Speaker 1: And it was it was it was that moment that

1427
01:03:34,720 --> 01:03:37,760
Speaker 1: really was like, Okay, this this is the real eye opener,

1428
01:03:37,920 --> 01:03:39,919
Speaker 1: Like this is you If I'm going to really live

1429
01:03:39,920 --> 01:03:43,520
Speaker 1: in authentic life, it's gonna be from this point on.

1430
01:03:44,520 --> 01:03:46,160
Speaker 1: That's why this year is very important because this is

1431
01:03:46,200 --> 01:03:50,360
Speaker 1: this is the year of the snake. The lunar in

1432
01:03:50,720 --> 01:03:54,680
Speaker 1: Chinese odiac wait a year the snake. Two twenty six

1433
01:03:54,720 --> 01:03:56,880
Speaker 1: is a year of the horse, but twenty twenty five is

1434
01:03:56,880 --> 01:03:58,840
Speaker 1: a year the snake, because we're supposed to be shedding

1435
01:03:59,720 --> 01:04:02,360
Speaker 1: all all our old bullshit, like all our old bullshit,

1436
01:04:02,400 --> 01:04:05,000
Speaker 1: the bad energy, the negative energy, you know, the things

1437
01:04:05,040 --> 01:04:08,600
Speaker 1: that have caused you guilt, the things that you're insecure about.

1438
01:04:08,640 --> 01:04:10,920
Speaker 1: Like this is the year that you're supposed to really, really,

1439
01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:14,080
Speaker 1: really let it all go, and it's about new beginnings

1440
01:04:14,120 --> 01:04:16,720
Speaker 1: and transformation. In twenty twenty six is the year of

1441
01:04:16,720 --> 01:04:18,520
Speaker 1: the horse, and you're supposed to get off, get on

1442
01:04:18,560 --> 01:04:21,440
Speaker 1: that horse, and you know, ride into your destiny.

1443
01:04:22,960 --> 01:04:28,120
Speaker 3: Sold sold, So I would like to buy that.

1444
01:04:28,120 --> 01:04:30,600
Speaker 1: That's right. And it's a nine year, and nine is

1445
01:04:30,640 --> 01:04:32,640
Speaker 1: the highest level of change. So if you feel like

1446
01:04:32,720 --> 01:04:35,280
Speaker 1: things are changing right now, if you feel like there's

1447
01:04:35,280 --> 01:04:37,560
Speaker 1: a shift going on with you right now, it's because

1448
01:04:37,600 --> 01:04:43,000
Speaker 1: it actually is. It energetically, karmically is right now. And

1449
01:04:43,000 --> 01:04:47,480
Speaker 1: then we got nineteen days to really shed and you know,

1450
01:04:47,720 --> 01:04:50,080
Speaker 1: let all of those things from the past that may

1451
01:04:50,120 --> 01:04:52,400
Speaker 1: have been holding you back, all those regrets, whatever it is.

1452
01:04:52,480 --> 01:04:55,200
Speaker 1: You got nineteen days to let that all go and

1453
01:04:56,640 --> 01:04:59,040
Speaker 1: ride off into the sunset in twenty twenty six on

1454
01:04:59,080 --> 01:04:59,520
Speaker 1: your horse.

1455
01:05:00,040 --> 01:05:02,040
Speaker 3: I might have to do ayahuasca before the end of

1456
01:05:02,040 --> 01:05:02,400
Speaker 3: the year.

1457
01:05:02,800 --> 01:05:06,960
Speaker 1: The year I got there huh, Mexico. I did it

1458
01:05:06,960 --> 01:05:09,920
Speaker 1: in Cali, Cali. I did it in Cali, and it

1459
01:05:10,000 --> 01:05:12,760
Speaker 1: was an amazing experience and I recommend it. Yes, I

1460
01:05:12,760 --> 01:05:14,320
Speaker 1: did it with a group of people. It was like,

1461
01:05:14,960 --> 01:05:18,320
Speaker 1: are you fifteen of us? And well you knew I

1462
01:05:18,320 --> 01:05:21,720
Speaker 1: didn't know everybody, but I knew the Whost family very well,

1463
01:05:21,960 --> 01:05:23,560
Speaker 1: and my wife and my wife did it and my

1464
01:05:23,600 --> 01:05:25,880
Speaker 1: wife did it with us, and yeah, it was it

1465
01:05:25,920 --> 01:05:30,840
Speaker 1: was very I can't. I can't even if you're already

1466
01:05:30,880 --> 01:05:32,880
Speaker 1: a spiritual person and you've already been doing the work

1467
01:05:32,880 --> 01:05:37,480
Speaker 1: on yourself, it is one of the most incredible things

1468
01:05:37,520 --> 01:05:39,560
Speaker 1: that you could ever do. I don't even know if

1469
01:05:39,560 --> 01:05:42,120
Speaker 1: I would do it if I hadn't ha done, had

1470
01:05:42,160 --> 01:05:43,960
Speaker 1: done so much work on myself. Like, you don't go

1471
01:05:44,040 --> 01:05:49,320
Speaker 1: from zero to that, Yeah, you don't go from zero

1472
01:05:49,400 --> 01:05:49,600
Speaker 1: to that.

1473
01:05:49,680 --> 01:05:52,040
Speaker 2: All right, we got two segments to do. This is

1474
01:05:52,120 --> 01:05:55,400
Speaker 2: our voice notes segments. Okay, it's a question our comment.

1475
01:05:56,600 --> 01:05:59,560
Speaker 3: Usually there are questions. Today's a comment presented by boost Mobile,

1476
01:06:01,280 --> 01:06:03,800
Speaker 3: and it's in the spirit of mentorship because you've been

1477
01:06:03,840 --> 01:06:05,040
Speaker 3: such a great mentor.

1478
01:06:04,720 --> 01:06:07,520
Speaker 1: So go Charlamagne. This is urt.

1479
01:06:07,640 --> 01:06:10,880
Speaker 4: I just want to thank you for helping me understand

1480
01:06:11,040 --> 01:06:15,000
Speaker 4: just how necessary and how essential I am in this world.

1481
01:06:15,120 --> 01:06:16,960
Speaker 4: You know, when I first moved to New York City,

1482
01:06:17,080 --> 01:06:19,080
Speaker 4: I was twenty one years old at the time, fresh

1483
01:06:19,120 --> 01:06:21,920
Speaker 4: out of college, and things didn't go my way as

1484
01:06:21,920 --> 01:06:24,920
Speaker 4: I plan at all. You know, I felt like a failure.

1485
01:06:25,200 --> 01:06:27,800
Speaker 4: I was working at a small apartment gym in Manhattan

1486
01:06:28,440 --> 01:06:31,240
Speaker 4: and looking back home, I was watching my friends get

1487
01:06:31,240 --> 01:06:34,720
Speaker 4: into their corporate jobs and living their dreams, and I

1488
01:06:34,760 --> 01:06:37,959
Speaker 4: felt embarrassed and lost. But when I heard your South

1489
01:06:38,000 --> 01:06:42,680
Speaker 4: Carolina commencement speech, it changed my mindset. You said that

1490
01:06:42,720 --> 01:06:47,320
Speaker 4: we are necessary because God designed us, and that reminded

1491
01:06:47,360 --> 01:06:49,440
Speaker 4: me that my journey still has purpose.

1492
01:06:49,600 --> 01:06:51,840
Speaker 3: So I repeat that to myself every night.

1493
01:06:52,080 --> 01:06:54,800
Speaker 4: So I want to thank you for helping me understand

1494
01:06:54,840 --> 01:06:55,800
Speaker 4: my powers hard.

1495
01:06:56,080 --> 01:06:58,000
Speaker 3: Oh did you know that story? Did you know that

1496
01:06:58,080 --> 01:06:58,520
Speaker 3: about him?

1497
01:06:58,920 --> 01:07:00,360
Speaker 1: Yeah? I knew to think about this a line of

1498
01:07:00,360 --> 01:07:03,360
Speaker 1: commission speech because I remember seeing him tweet one day

1499
01:07:03,360 --> 01:07:06,240
Speaker 1: that he a posts on Instagram somewhere He used to

1500
01:07:06,240 --> 01:07:07,520
Speaker 1: always tag me, and he was like, I listen to

1501
01:07:07,520 --> 01:07:10,720
Speaker 1: this speech every day, and then you know, nihilou he

1502
01:07:10,800 --> 01:07:13,960
Speaker 1: knew Nihlage in somehow, some way, and nowledge like, I

1503
01:07:13,960 --> 01:07:16,120
Speaker 1: really want you to meet this guy named art he

1504
01:07:16,280 --> 01:07:18,680
Speaker 1: you know, really looks up to you and now art

1505
01:07:18,680 --> 01:07:19,880
Speaker 1: works up one five to one.

1506
01:07:20,080 --> 01:07:23,720
Speaker 2: So you're really good like that, like seeing the driving

1507
01:07:23,760 --> 01:07:26,200
Speaker 2: people and the talent and people and supporting and putting

1508
01:07:26,200 --> 01:07:28,360
Speaker 2: your arms around them, which I think is amazing. But

1509
01:07:28,440 --> 01:07:30,640
Speaker 2: isn't that cool when you when you have a moment

1510
01:07:30,800 --> 01:07:35,840
Speaker 2: that that line you said about God designed line.

1511
01:07:35,920 --> 01:07:39,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, God, God You're necessary because God designs you to

1512
01:07:39,800 --> 01:07:43,120
Speaker 1: be necessary. You just got to find that thing that

1513
01:07:43,560 --> 01:07:46,720
Speaker 1: you're necessary at doing. Like that's the problem with the

1514
01:07:46,720 --> 01:07:49,200
Speaker 1: world that we're in now. It's so many people trying

1515
01:07:49,200 --> 01:07:51,040
Speaker 1: to do what everybody else is doing. So I'm like,

1516
01:07:51,040 --> 01:07:53,280
Speaker 1: why be a second rate version of somebody else when

1517
01:07:53,280 --> 01:07:54,920
Speaker 1: you could be a first rate version of yourself. Like

1518
01:07:54,920 --> 01:07:58,840
Speaker 1: the analogy I like to use is is Christmas time?

1519
01:07:59,240 --> 01:08:01,880
Speaker 1: And what it's Christmas time? Lord that mercy, it's Christmas time,

1520
01:08:02,160 --> 01:08:06,560
Speaker 1: and so there's a big old Christmas tree. But everybody

1521
01:08:07,080 --> 01:08:10,160
Speaker 1: in the world has a gift under that tree that

1522
01:08:10,200 --> 01:08:13,640
Speaker 1: can absolutely change their life and change their circumstance. Your

1523
01:08:13,680 --> 01:08:17,240
Speaker 1: gift is under there, it's there, but everybody in the

1524
01:08:17,400 --> 01:08:21,360
Speaker 1: world is trying to get to their gift. So imagine

1525
01:08:21,360 --> 01:08:23,559
Speaker 1: how frustrated you'll get your art saying how he saw

1526
01:08:23,560 --> 01:08:26,479
Speaker 1: everybody else getting their corporate jobs. Some people get frustrated

1527
01:08:26,479 --> 01:08:29,120
Speaker 1: about that and just quick they just be like, ah, man,

1528
01:08:29,200 --> 01:08:31,559
Speaker 1: I ain't gonna never find you know what's mine. So

1529
01:08:31,800 --> 01:08:33,840
Speaker 1: the only person that can literally stop you in that

1530
01:08:33,920 --> 01:08:36,519
Speaker 1: situation is you. If you just be patient, if you

1531
01:08:36,680 --> 01:08:39,280
Speaker 1: just keep working, if you just be consistent at trying

1532
01:08:39,280 --> 01:08:41,760
Speaker 1: to find what it is that you know is going

1533
01:08:41,840 --> 01:08:44,439
Speaker 1: to change your life, eventually you will find your gift.

1534
01:08:44,520 --> 01:08:47,120
Speaker 1: And when you find that gift, everything else opens up

1535
01:08:47,160 --> 01:08:50,200
Speaker 1: for you. But just imagine the frustration that could set

1536
01:08:50,240 --> 01:08:54,000
Speaker 1: in when everybody in the world is competing with you

1537
01:08:54,120 --> 01:08:57,280
Speaker 1: to try to find their gift. Under this tree. It's there.

1538
01:08:58,000 --> 01:09:01,120
Speaker 1: It just takes some patience in some time. I'm defined

1539
01:09:01,160 --> 01:09:02,920
Speaker 1: it right and not quit.

1540
01:09:02,960 --> 01:09:04,400
Speaker 2: But it's one thing to have this idea of this

1541
01:09:04,439 --> 01:09:06,760
Speaker 2: epiphany that you have right and then say it and

1542
01:09:06,760 --> 01:09:08,960
Speaker 2: then go to a commencement speech and share it.

1543
01:09:09,360 --> 01:09:10,040
Speaker 1: I don't know, but it.

1544
01:09:10,560 --> 01:09:14,679
Speaker 2: Receiving it back when you see it actually doing its work.

1545
01:09:14,880 --> 01:09:18,759
Speaker 2: It's actually you plant the scene and it actually lands

1546
01:09:19,400 --> 01:09:21,320
Speaker 2: and it actually changes somebody's life.

1547
01:09:21,400 --> 01:09:23,599
Speaker 1: That's God. That's why when you so when you pray

1548
01:09:24,240 --> 01:09:26,400
Speaker 1: as when you're writing a speech, right, like when you're

1549
01:09:26,400 --> 01:09:28,840
Speaker 1: writing a commisment speech. I wrote, I write like don't

1550
01:09:28,920 --> 01:09:31,560
Speaker 1: I didn't have a team of writers. It wasn't no

1551
01:09:31,840 --> 01:09:34,920
Speaker 1: GPT with I this commission speech. Like I wrote the

1552
01:09:34,920 --> 01:09:36,840
Speaker 1: commission speech and it was from my mother's alma mater,

1553
01:09:36,920 --> 01:09:39,080
Speaker 1: South Carolina State University. And then I ended up getting

1554
01:09:39,160 --> 01:09:41,680
Speaker 1: an honorary degree from them as well. And so it's

1555
01:09:41,720 --> 01:09:43,639
Speaker 1: just like when I wrote that, like those I pray,

1556
01:09:43,720 --> 01:09:46,240
Speaker 1: I say, God, I want you to guide my words.

1557
01:09:46,320 --> 01:09:49,439
Speaker 1: What is it that you want me to tell these

1558
01:09:49,479 --> 01:09:52,559
Speaker 1: students in this moment. That's the download God gave me

1559
01:09:52,600 --> 01:09:55,559
Speaker 1: to share to them, Share with them. Look at art,

1560
01:09:55,920 --> 01:10:01,360
Speaker 1: Look at art, look at Hardt. All even appreciates you

1561
01:10:01,360 --> 01:10:04,760
Speaker 1: know where he's at because I you know, you remember that,

1562
01:10:04,840 --> 01:10:06,760
Speaker 1: you remember being a young board out working at the

1563
01:10:06,880 --> 01:10:10,080
Speaker 1: radio station, you know. But now they these kids can

1564
01:10:10,080 --> 01:10:12,920
Speaker 1: do other things as well, have their own podcasts and stuff.

1565
01:10:13,040 --> 01:10:15,400
Speaker 1: While they're doing that. It's just fun to watch because

1566
01:10:15,439 --> 01:10:18,720
Speaker 1: you just never know where people are going to end up.

1567
01:10:18,920 --> 01:10:20,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, it is really fun.

1568
01:10:20,479 --> 01:10:23,360
Speaker 2: This episode is brought to you by Walden University. You

1569
01:10:23,400 --> 01:10:24,680
Speaker 2: guys think you're too busy to.

1570
01:10:24,640 --> 01:10:25,479
Speaker 3: Earn the degree.

1571
01:10:25,560 --> 01:10:29,000
Speaker 2: That you have always wanted. You are not too busy.

1572
01:10:29,120 --> 01:10:32,160
Speaker 2: It's never too late. At Walden University, you can get

1573
01:10:32,200 --> 01:10:34,600
Speaker 2: the W that's what they do. They get the WH

1574
01:10:34,680 --> 01:10:37,000
Speaker 2: and you can win your time back with tempo learning.

1575
01:10:37,320 --> 01:10:39,360
Speaker 3: You are in control. This is very cool.

1576
01:10:39,400 --> 01:10:42,800
Speaker 2: There are no weekly deadlines, there are no rigid schedules.

1577
01:10:42,840 --> 01:10:46,080
Speaker 2: Who has time for that. There's just a flexibility for

1578
01:10:46,160 --> 01:10:48,880
Speaker 2: you to earn your degree on your terms, at your

1579
01:10:49,000 --> 01:10:53,360
Speaker 2: pace and within your budget. Ready to start visit waldenyu

1580
01:10:53,520 --> 01:10:57,719
Speaker 2: dot edu Today Walden University set a Course for Change,

1581
01:10:58,120 --> 01:11:01,680
Speaker 2: Certified to operate by chev All right, and lastly, our I.

1582
01:11:01,760 --> 01:11:02,360
Speaker 1: R L bowl.

1583
01:11:02,439 --> 01:11:05,960
Speaker 2: Let's get in there, my guy. Our in Real Life

1584
01:11:06,000 --> 01:11:08,439
Speaker 2: Bowls segment is brought to you by Walden University.

1585
01:11:08,479 --> 01:11:10,240
Speaker 1: I don't know. All these questions aren't the same question.

1586
01:11:15,600 --> 01:11:18,800
Speaker 1: If today were your last day on earth, what would

1587
01:11:18,840 --> 01:11:20,759
Speaker 1: you be doing? Dying?

1588
01:11:24,400 --> 01:11:24,679
Speaker 4: Dying?

1589
01:11:25,400 --> 01:11:28,920
Speaker 3: Maybe your death is sudden, Maybe your death is sudden,

1590
01:11:28,960 --> 01:11:30,800
Speaker 3: Why would you? Maybe you don't know. Maybe you have

1591
01:11:30,840 --> 01:11:32,920
Speaker 3: a whole full day before you start dying.

1592
01:11:33,040 --> 01:11:34,880
Speaker 1: If today was my last day on Earth, I would

1593
01:11:34,880 --> 01:11:35,320
Speaker 1: be living.

1594
01:11:36,000 --> 01:11:38,120
Speaker 3: I don't know why. My Joe Button death concept just

1595
01:11:38,160 --> 01:11:38,600
Speaker 3: came to me.

1596
01:11:38,680 --> 01:11:40,120
Speaker 1: What's the Joe, butden death concept.

1597
01:11:40,400 --> 01:11:41,840
Speaker 3: I had Joe on the pod.

1598
01:11:41,920 --> 01:11:45,200
Speaker 2: He thinks that we all have. This was when I

1599
01:11:45,280 --> 01:11:47,200
Speaker 2: was in my We're all Gonna die bag in the

1600
01:11:47,200 --> 01:11:50,200
Speaker 2: beginning of the pod. But he has a theory that

1601
01:11:51,160 --> 01:11:53,479
Speaker 2: there are signs that we all get, signs in our

1602
01:11:53,520 --> 01:11:55,960
Speaker 2: life that will let us know how we're gonna leave,

1603
01:11:56,280 --> 01:11:58,960
Speaker 2: like how we're gonna pass interesting. If you pay attention

1604
01:11:59,000 --> 01:12:02,280
Speaker 2: to the details of your life, that it almost will

1605
01:12:02,280 --> 01:12:04,960
Speaker 2: tell you how it's gonna end.

1606
01:12:05,240 --> 01:12:07,560
Speaker 1: Interesting. I know you have to hear from me.

1607
01:12:08,000 --> 01:12:10,000
Speaker 3: Are you friendly with him or you guys you're like

1608
01:12:10,000 --> 01:12:11,160
Speaker 3: good and bad. You're like front of me.

1609
01:12:11,479 --> 01:12:14,160
Speaker 1: No, I haven't talked to him in a while. I

1610
01:12:14,160 --> 01:12:15,960
Speaker 1: haven't talked to Joe in a while. I don't have

1611
01:12:16,040 --> 01:12:17,240
Speaker 1: I don't have any problems with you.

1612
01:12:18,840 --> 01:12:20,720
Speaker 3: Actually, I feel like you should be friendly, the two

1613
01:12:20,760 --> 01:12:20,920
Speaker 3: of you.

1614
01:12:21,040 --> 01:12:22,400
Speaker 1: No, I actually got I got a lot of love

1615
01:12:22,439 --> 01:12:24,320
Speaker 1: with Joe, Me and Joe. You know what it is,

1616
01:12:24,520 --> 01:12:27,280
Speaker 1: Me and Joe when we are mad at each other,

1617
01:12:27,360 --> 01:12:29,360
Speaker 1: we go bad on each other. I know.

1618
01:12:30,160 --> 01:12:32,960
Speaker 2: But you're both involved now like you should be. You

1619
01:12:33,000 --> 01:12:34,400
Speaker 2: should be in better space.

1620
01:12:34,479 --> 01:12:36,960
Speaker 3: Like I don't know, I know you both.

1621
01:12:37,040 --> 01:12:41,200
Speaker 1: I know I'll run into him somewhere and we will

1622
01:12:41,200 --> 01:12:44,639
Speaker 1: pick up like we always have. I'm sure, but that's

1623
01:12:44,640 --> 01:12:46,439
Speaker 1: all it is. When me and Joe go bad, we

1624
01:12:46,479 --> 01:12:49,040
Speaker 1: go bad on each other. And like when I hear

1625
01:12:49,840 --> 01:12:53,360
Speaker 1: why he he's upset with me, I'm like, oh, I

1626
01:12:53,360 --> 01:12:56,400
Speaker 1: can understand why he why he felt that way, you

1627
01:12:56,400 --> 01:12:57,920
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying like this, like this last one,

1628
01:12:58,160 --> 01:13:00,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, I get it. I didn't mean.

1629
01:13:00,760 --> 01:13:03,080
Speaker 3: It in the way that he received it.

1630
01:13:03,040 --> 01:13:05,840
Speaker 1: Received it, but I can understand why he felt that way.

1631
01:13:05,840 --> 01:13:07,519
Speaker 1: That's when I think when he when he was going

1632
01:13:07,560 --> 01:13:12,160
Speaker 1: through his, uh, his last situation with Spotify, and I

1633
01:13:12,200 --> 01:13:13,680
Speaker 1: was on the radio and I said, I said, I

1634
01:13:13,680 --> 01:13:18,240
Speaker 1: think Joe Budden understands Joe Budden knows his worth, he

1635
01:13:18,320 --> 01:13:20,160
Speaker 1: just doesn't know how to negotiate it or something like

1636
01:13:20,360 --> 01:13:21,640
Speaker 1: I think, I said. And I was just like, you know,

1637
01:13:21,640 --> 01:13:25,080
Speaker 1: if if every time you're at a corporation and things

1638
01:13:25,120 --> 01:13:27,360
Speaker 1: don't go the way you want them to, kind of

1639
01:13:27,400 --> 01:13:29,479
Speaker 1: gotta blame you and you and your team. And then

1640
01:13:29,479 --> 01:13:31,519
Speaker 1: we were saying it was a whole discussion around podcasts,

1641
01:13:31,520 --> 01:13:33,639
Speaker 1: and I was like, you know, you can't compare yourself

1642
01:13:33,680 --> 01:13:36,360
Speaker 1: to the Joe Rogan's and the Bill Simmons and all

1643
01:13:36,400 --> 01:13:38,880
Speaker 1: of those guys, because Joe Rogan is an anomaly number one, Like, no,

1644
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:41,560
Speaker 1: don't nobody do numbers like Rogan period, black, white, It

1645
01:13:41,600 --> 01:13:44,200
Speaker 1: don't matter. And you know the guys like Bill Simmons, them,

1646
01:13:44,240 --> 01:13:47,800
Speaker 1: they have networks, so they get compensated a little bit

1647
01:13:47,840 --> 01:13:51,680
Speaker 1: different for that. And so that was actually a conversation

1648
01:13:51,720 --> 01:13:55,320
Speaker 1: I probably shouldn't have been having publicly publicly on air,

1649
01:13:55,800 --> 01:13:58,400
Speaker 1: but you know, we on radio, we on these podcasts,

1650
01:13:58,439 --> 01:14:00,920
Speaker 1: and we all do it. He he does it as well,

1651
01:14:00,960 --> 01:14:01,120
Speaker 1: you know.

1652
01:14:01,120 --> 01:14:01,599
Speaker 3: What I'm saying.

1653
01:14:02,040 --> 01:14:05,080
Speaker 1: So but I in that moment, what he was saying

1654
01:14:05,280 --> 01:14:09,280
Speaker 1: was when somebody like Charlamagne says that these people are listening,

1655
01:14:09,680 --> 01:14:13,880
Speaker 1: like meaning not regular listeners, the people that Spotify and

1656
01:14:13,920 --> 01:14:16,000
Speaker 1: the people that these corporations. But it wasn't like I

1657
01:14:16,040 --> 01:14:20,280
Speaker 1: wasn't saying he wasn't worth it. I was just just

1658
01:14:20,320 --> 01:14:21,879
Speaker 1: speaking how I felt about the situation.

1659
01:14:21,960 --> 01:14:25,080
Speaker 2: And in that moment, and you're both speaking to your audience,

1660
01:14:25,240 --> 01:14:27,879
Speaker 2: to our audience, you are not speaking to each other exactly.

1661
01:14:28,200 --> 01:14:30,240
Speaker 1: But you know the crazy part is we were. We

1662
01:14:30,280 --> 01:14:32,040
Speaker 1: do speak to each other. So it's like, I'll go

1663
01:14:32,080 --> 01:14:35,040
Speaker 1: from that on the radio to then watching him tweet,

1664
01:14:35,080 --> 01:14:37,040
Speaker 1: and then we might be on the phone that afternoon

1665
01:14:37,479 --> 01:14:40,680
Speaker 1: having the same discussion argument. But I don't think he

1666
01:14:41,120 --> 01:14:43,320
Speaker 1: expressed me back then that he didn't like me saying

1667
01:14:43,320 --> 01:14:45,120
Speaker 1: that on the air. It was just a debate about

1668
01:14:45,800 --> 01:14:49,679
Speaker 1: the content of the situation. And then it was even

1669
01:14:49,680 --> 01:14:52,600
Speaker 1: when he went bad on his podcast. We were on

1670
01:14:52,640 --> 01:14:57,559
Speaker 1: the phone that Sunday, and then another time he got

1671
01:14:57,600 --> 01:15:00,280
Speaker 1: mad because I didn't answer his call and it's stupid shit.

1672
01:15:01,040 --> 01:15:03,800
Speaker 1: So's it's really nothing. But when we go bad on

1673
01:15:03,840 --> 01:15:06,519
Speaker 1: each other, we go bad? What the hell on each other?

1674
01:15:06,600 --> 01:15:09,240
Speaker 1: What is that? It's because you're probably both mad men.

1675
01:15:09,280 --> 01:15:10,800
Speaker 1: I don't fucking you know what I mean.

1676
01:15:10,800 --> 01:15:14,160
Speaker 2: I was thinking something in that.

1677
01:15:15,360 --> 01:15:19,040
Speaker 3: I just wonder if you guys were I enjoy you

1678
01:15:19,080 --> 01:15:19,640
Speaker 3: both very much.

1679
01:15:19,680 --> 01:15:21,720
Speaker 2: I would like to see you guys make NICEA sure

1680
01:15:21,720 --> 01:15:22,880
Speaker 2: it will, I'm sure it will.

1681
01:15:22,960 --> 01:15:25,880
Speaker 3: All right? One more? Take one more? Or in real

1682
01:15:25,920 --> 01:15:27,000
Speaker 3: life ball question?

1683
01:15:27,280 --> 01:15:29,040
Speaker 1: Give me something? That last one was dark?

1684
01:15:29,400 --> 01:15:29,920
Speaker 3: It was dark?

1685
01:15:30,000 --> 01:15:32,360
Speaker 1: What are some of your pet peeves?

1686
01:15:32,800 --> 01:15:33,800
Speaker 3: Triggers?

1687
01:15:34,160 --> 01:15:40,360
Speaker 1: Adult liars? I hate adult liars. Who are you afraid of?

1688
01:15:41,120 --> 01:15:44,040
Speaker 1: What are you still lying for? At your big age?

1689
01:15:44,640 --> 01:15:47,000
Speaker 1: I was born in nineteen hundred and seventy I'm forty seven.

1690
01:15:47,000 --> 01:15:50,880
Speaker 1: There's no reason for adults to be lying to each other.

1691
01:15:50,960 --> 01:15:56,240
Speaker 1: I can't stand it. It drives me crazy when adults

1692
01:15:56,640 --> 01:16:00,320
Speaker 1: lie to each other like we're grown, because it feel

1693
01:16:00,320 --> 01:16:02,080
Speaker 1: like you're lying to themselves.

1694
01:16:02,160 --> 01:16:04,000
Speaker 3: Usually it's because they lying to themselves.

1695
01:16:04,040 --> 01:16:06,160
Speaker 1: That's right, that's right. So most people that are still

1696
01:16:06,240 --> 01:16:09,840
Speaker 1: lying to themselves have no problem lying to you. And

1697
01:16:09,840 --> 01:16:13,200
Speaker 1: I don't understand how we advance as a society, or

1698
01:16:13,400 --> 01:16:16,120
Speaker 1: forget society. I don't understand how this relationship can advance

1699
01:16:16,560 --> 01:16:19,679
Speaker 1: if we're never dealing with reality. I'm dealing with reality,

1700
01:16:19,680 --> 01:16:23,759
Speaker 1: but you're always lying. I can't have people. I cannot

1701
01:16:23,800 --> 01:16:26,439
Speaker 1: have people like that around me, those pet those pet peeves,

1702
01:16:26,840 --> 01:16:29,280
Speaker 1: those type of triggers. I don't want those people around me.

1703
01:16:29,560 --> 01:16:34,680
Speaker 3: What are you most proud of about yourself through this

1704
01:16:34,720 --> 01:16:35,439
Speaker 3: whole journey?

1705
01:16:37,200 --> 01:16:41,559
Speaker 1: Man? What am I most proud of about myself? I've

1706
01:16:41,600 --> 01:16:44,920
Speaker 1: never thought about that. What am I most proud of

1707
01:16:44,960 --> 01:16:52,400
Speaker 1: about myself? I mean, honestly, probably probably the evolution of

1708
01:16:51,760 --> 01:16:55,240
Speaker 1: of of being a husband and being being a father

1709
01:16:56,040 --> 01:16:59,759
Speaker 1: like that. That's that's when I feel the most proud

1710
01:17:00,080 --> 01:17:04,000
Speaker 1: that I've created like a stable environment for my kids,

1711
01:17:04,040 --> 01:17:06,920
Speaker 1: like my kids have so many options and for the

1712
01:17:06,960 --> 01:17:10,920
Speaker 1: rest of their life will have so many options, you know.

1713
01:17:11,200 --> 01:17:14,400
Speaker 1: Like I always say, I wanted to just raise trauma

1714
01:17:14,439 --> 01:17:17,519
Speaker 1: free children for the most part, and I think I've

1715
01:17:17,520 --> 01:17:19,040
Speaker 1: been doing a pretty good job of that. Like you

1716
01:17:19,040 --> 01:17:22,320
Speaker 1: can't protect them from life, of course, but you know

1717
01:17:22,400 --> 01:17:24,400
Speaker 1: they live a good life, you know, like they got

1718
01:17:24,400 --> 01:17:27,320
Speaker 1: the trauma from and they get the trauma from me exactly,

1719
01:17:27,360 --> 01:17:29,280
Speaker 1: Like they live a good life. Like the fact that

1720
01:17:29,640 --> 01:17:31,760
Speaker 1: you know, we are able to travel and I didn't

1721
01:17:31,760 --> 01:17:33,400
Speaker 1: get on a plane until I was twenty one, twenty

1722
01:17:33,439 --> 01:17:35,240
Speaker 1: two years old, flying in New York, like twenty one

1723
01:17:35,280 --> 01:17:38,080
Speaker 1: twenty two years the person I even traveled, right, But

1724
01:17:38,160 --> 01:17:42,080
Speaker 1: for them, they've been all around the world right like

1725
01:17:42,080 --> 01:17:45,280
Speaker 1: like and you see how that shows up and just

1726
01:17:45,320 --> 01:17:49,240
Speaker 1: their everyday vernacular, like you know, their their their intelligence,

1727
01:17:49,360 --> 01:17:52,000
Speaker 1: like the way they're able to communicate with people. When

1728
01:17:52,000 --> 01:17:55,680
Speaker 1: they're in school, they're you know, doing reports about their

1729
01:17:55,720 --> 01:17:59,160
Speaker 1: reading about places they've actually been. Like that's cool. When

1730
01:17:59,200 --> 01:18:01,160
Speaker 1: you watch your daughter, I have to do a report on,

1731
01:18:01,560 --> 01:18:04,840
Speaker 1: you know, someplace like South Africa, but she's like, I

1732
01:18:04,840 --> 01:18:07,120
Speaker 1: got pictures of me and South Africa.

1733
01:18:07,720 --> 01:18:08,640
Speaker 3: I'm gonna tell you about that.

1734
01:18:08,920 --> 01:18:11,280
Speaker 1: Exactly what you mean, Nelson Mandela I was at I

1735
01:18:11,479 --> 01:18:13,320
Speaker 1: went to the jail that Nelson Mandela was in. Like

1736
01:18:13,520 --> 01:18:17,240
Speaker 1: that stuff, you know, means a lot. So I think

1737
01:18:17,280 --> 01:18:19,479
Speaker 1: that I'm most proud of being able to be in

1738
01:18:19,479 --> 01:18:21,479
Speaker 1: a position to create that kind of environment for my

1739
01:18:21,520 --> 01:18:26,200
Speaker 1: wife and kids to where they can live live a

1740
01:18:26,240 --> 01:18:30,120
Speaker 1: pretty trauma free life. Well done, that's what makes me proud.

1741
01:18:30,160 --> 01:18:32,720
Speaker 3: I mean, that's pretty good. That's a great accomplishment. This

1742
01:18:32,800 --> 01:18:34,760
Speaker 3: is my last question. This is my favorite one in

1743
01:18:34,800 --> 01:18:35,080
Speaker 3: the ball.

1744
01:18:35,560 --> 01:18:40,439
Speaker 1: One more thing, Yes, And the opportunities I'm able to

1745
01:18:40,680 --> 01:18:42,599
Speaker 1: provide by being in this position because I always say

1746
01:18:42,600 --> 01:18:45,280
Speaker 1: I want to be the adult that I needed as

1747
01:18:45,280 --> 01:18:48,960
Speaker 1: a child. And going back to you know, not not

1748
01:18:49,040 --> 01:18:51,440
Speaker 1: the hard parted, but going back to the document documentary,

1749
01:18:51,439 --> 01:18:53,840
Speaker 1: it's like, you know, just being able to do right

1750
01:18:53,920 --> 01:18:56,479
Speaker 1: by people, you know what I'm saying, Like like, you know,

1751
01:18:56,920 --> 01:19:00,800
Speaker 1: it's a great feeling to have somebody reach out and

1752
01:19:00,840 --> 01:19:05,160
Speaker 1: be like, you know, this check is the biggest check

1753
01:19:05,200 --> 01:19:07,200
Speaker 1: I've ever seen in my life. Like that type of

1754
01:19:07,240 --> 01:19:09,360
Speaker 1: like I like stuff like that, you know what I mean,

1755
01:19:09,479 --> 01:19:11,920
Speaker 1: Being able to put somebody in position to you know,

1756
01:19:12,160 --> 01:19:14,400
Speaker 1: get a book deal, whatever it is, helping other people,

1757
01:19:15,280 --> 01:19:18,639
Speaker 1: you know, make their dreams come alive. That is that?

1758
01:19:18,640 --> 01:19:19,840
Speaker 1: That makes me proud too.

1759
01:19:20,720 --> 01:19:23,880
Speaker 3: That's pretty great. Here's your last question.

1760
01:19:25,240 --> 01:19:25,680
Speaker 1: You picked it.

1761
01:19:25,920 --> 01:19:28,720
Speaker 2: I picked it out and it's my favorite one, so

1762
01:19:28,720 --> 01:19:29,840
Speaker 2: I'm trying to make sure you got it.

1763
01:19:30,479 --> 01:19:31,519
Speaker 3: That's my favorite question.

1764
01:19:33,479 --> 01:19:36,040
Speaker 1: Jesus Christ, I me your glasses. If God were to

1765
01:19:36,080 --> 01:19:39,479
Speaker 1: text you right now, what would it say. He would

1766
01:19:39,479 --> 01:19:43,439
Speaker 1: say good job, That's what he would say.

1767
01:19:44,080 --> 01:19:44,599
Speaker 3: Two words.

1768
01:19:44,640 --> 01:19:49,360
Speaker 1: He would say good job, maybe keep going. Probably might

1769
01:19:49,400 --> 01:19:51,200
Speaker 1: say good job keeping You know what. I want him

1770
01:19:51,200 --> 01:19:53,160
Speaker 1: to say, good job, keep going, because good job might

1771
01:19:53,200 --> 01:19:54,360
Speaker 1: mean all right, come on home now.

1772
01:19:54,360 --> 01:19:54,800
Speaker 3: I don't want to.

1773
01:19:55,680 --> 01:19:58,880
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, good job, keep going, good job,

1774
01:19:58,960 --> 01:20:00,599
Speaker 1: comm keep going?

1775
01:20:01,200 --> 01:20:02,800
Speaker 3: You know jobs, keep going.

1776
01:20:02,880 --> 01:20:03,320
Speaker 1: That's right.

1777
01:20:03,479 --> 01:20:05,840
Speaker 3: Charlamagnea god in real life.

1778
01:20:06,000 --> 01:20:13,000
Speaker 1: Yes, indeed, this is charlamagnea god in real life. Hey guys,

1779
01:20:13,000 --> 01:20:13,639
Speaker 1: thanks for watching.

1780
01:20:13,680 --> 01:20:17,120
Speaker 2: Make sure you subscribe, like comments, and check out all

1781
01:20:17,120 --> 01:20:18,800
Speaker 2: of the other episodes we have on Edge.

1782
01:20:18,800 --> 01:20:20,200
Speaker 3: Martinez I R O Podcast