Speaker 1: Wine Down with Janet Kramer and I Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 1: All Right, guys, catch my breath? All right, are you
Speaker 1: good there? KB? Whoa thirty weeks you guys were closing
Speaker 1: in downs the gun. Yeah, because you can technically, I
Speaker 1: mean technically technically I've had friends. Okay, what was it,
Speaker 1: twenty four weeks? She just get dry breast one? No,
Speaker 1: I filled them in. Thanks for noticing. She looks really pretty.
Speaker 1: She has good makeup? Did good makeup? I need you
Speaker 1: look really refreshed, like you look like yourself still, just
Speaker 1: like very refreshed version, which is my favorite kind of
Speaker 1: makeup for people. I just got some new just like yeah,
Speaker 1: like moisturize her anyway. Thanks. Yeah, I was just like sorry.
Speaker 1: It was the first time I looked at you, and
Speaker 1: I was like, all right, I like it. Really sorry
Speaker 1: back to you, KB, Apologies were taking that away from you.
Speaker 1: It's a big moment. No, it's just a big body.
Speaker 1: Uh No, I was saying, because we've gosh, well, how
Speaker 1: how young were those twins that are people? Twenty four
Speaker 1: micro which is my girl. Yeah, they had like a
Speaker 1: zero or like a two percent, and but they both survived.
Speaker 1: I shouldn't be sorry. I should This has been a no.
Speaker 1: But I know, but I'm saying, but like, at this point,
Speaker 1: your baby could survive. I feel really like there is
Speaker 1: a point in pregnancy where you get to where you
Speaker 1: just started a little deeper. Yeah, a little until you
Speaker 1: got the stairs and then you're back out of breath
Speaker 1: again and then you get out of breath. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: it's good, so good. This has been my most um
Speaker 1: reassuring baby of the three. Real love the four really
Speaker 1: but um yeah, because I it moves so much. Oh so,
Speaker 1: I never wonder if if it's okay in there. I
Speaker 1: think she's like, hey, just so you know, like, I'm here, Mom,
Speaker 1: I'm here. Danna always thinks it's a girl. It's for
Speaker 1: sure a girl, Like I will get a boy. I
Speaker 1: will put money on it. That's a girl. Are you
Speaker 1: a good guesser? Mmm? I mean I have a fifty
Speaker 1: fifty shots, right. I usually am wrong, So whatever I
Speaker 1: guess is usually a sit for people. That's why I
Speaker 1: wonder if you're like, yeah, I'm undefeated. What were you guessing? Oh?
Speaker 1: I think it's a girl too. I've been correct with
Speaker 1: my own children, but everybody else is I'm horrible. Oh interesting, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel like I can like call It's like my
Speaker 1: sense of direction. You know direction you do. Thank you
Speaker 1: every time we're out of town. Just trust me, I
Speaker 1: know where I'm going. Thank you. Don't even meet a map,
Speaker 1: I just sniff it out. We're all trying to get
Speaker 1: the you know, it's like it's this way, guys. I
Speaker 1: don't know. I've just always been you know why. It's
Speaker 1: because I lived in the boonies from all of my
Speaker 1: friends and at that time, that was pre map quest.
Speaker 1: I try to figure out how to get to figure
Speaker 1: it out. It was pre map quest, Yeah, print it
Speaker 1: out just to figure it out. No, I think it
Speaker 1: was like so I was the oldest of the drivers
Speaker 1: and so I think it was. I remember printing it out,
Speaker 1: like going it going to someone's house. But it was
Speaker 1: like very new. Yeah, like because I was like having
Speaker 1: to write out mapst got me in the biggest trouble
Speaker 1: of my life. What happened. So my best friend Julie
Speaker 1: Cooper and I Mattie, she is still my best friend.
Speaker 1: Shout out to UK. I've never heard of her territorial
Speaker 1: here for it. So we printed out we were going
Speaker 1: to sneak off to Michigan State oh uh huh, which
Speaker 1: is like not like me. I get very nervous. I'm
Speaker 1: a rule follower. And we printed up the directions from
Speaker 1: her house to Michigan State and left them on the
Speaker 1: printer and her mom was like, you're going to go
Speaker 1: to Michigan State tonight and we were like, no, no way,
Speaker 1: and she like holds up the paper, what is this for?
Speaker 1: And I was like uh oh, and we were busted
Speaker 1: and then we were forbidden to see each other for
Speaker 1: like ever, isn't that senior? A senior senior in high school?
Speaker 1: Do you ever have Do you have a defining moment
Speaker 1: from childhood or something? Because mine came up just a
Speaker 1: couple days ago and I was walking with the kids,
Speaker 1: like I remembered something from our child hood that I've
Speaker 1: just I've it's always like it's it's just an interest story,
Speaker 1: just kind of like that where you get caught, Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: so it's where you get caught, yeah, and I got
Speaker 1: caught as a kid, but it's I mean, it's years
Speaker 1: is years is better, but it's I was the same
Speaker 1: mind for Kat can think about hers, but I me
Speaker 1: and my girlfriend Lindsay Crocker. Who did you met her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've never met her, so she's acceptable. Yeah, she's she
Speaker 1: came on the best one time. She's I mean, I
Speaker 1: mean we're not like you know, it was Lindsay Crocker.
Speaker 1: You're not like me and you go ahead there. It
Speaker 1: was Lindsay Crocker and Mary Dodge, and I was kind
Speaker 1: of always like so it was like me and Lindsay
Speaker 1: were the closest and then when there was the three
Speaker 1: of us, I was the outside. Okay, she was also
Speaker 1: close to Mary too, long story short, and Lindsay I
Speaker 1: was probably Jolie's age, like seven, six or seven. We
Speaker 1: wanted to do a dance show for our neighborhood and
Speaker 1: put on a dance like in the common area. So
Speaker 1: days on brand, are you okay? So I had we
Speaker 1: had made these flyers. We came up with this amazing
Speaker 1: dance in her basement of course perfect and my I
Speaker 1: wasn't allowed to cross the street like without a parent,
Speaker 1: and so what I did, and so my because we
Speaker 1: were had to hand out the flyers, right, I mean,
Speaker 1: when I go to the neighbor's house, like to give
Speaker 1: the flyers. Like, so my mom found out that you know,
Speaker 1: she saw the flyer in the other like in the mailbox,
Speaker 1: I think, or whatever, and I got grounded, and um,
Speaker 1: we never did our dance. But you know what's funny
Speaker 1: is I never really canceled it, so I don't even
Speaker 1: know that. I still wonder if anyone showed up, huge group,
Speaker 1: everyone in hand, wondering where. But I just remember getting
Speaker 1: like I couldn't cross the street. And so yesterday or
Speaker 1: the other day, when I was walking with the kids,
Speaker 1: I said, please stop at the stop sign, but they
Speaker 1: had then run across the street and gone home, and
Speaker 1: I was like, don't ever do that again. I was like,
Speaker 1: without mommy, because these cars I just go by so fast.
Speaker 1: But you know, and I wanted to be like and
Speaker 1: I had to cancel a dancers idea. They got grounding
Speaker 1: Kramer Cracker Done show was a big new show that
Speaker 1: was just Kramer and Cracker wasn't invited. He dodged one them.
Speaker 1: Thinking about all my kids running around the neighborhood right now,
Speaker 1: probably the streets different are a little older. So I've
Speaker 1: got Jace who doesn't look across with Jolie, and so
Speaker 1: I'm like, you can't just run brother across the street
Speaker 1: like that, like without looking you like more of the
Speaker 1: like Ramsey runs across the street to her, but like
Speaker 1: around a cold a sax, don't worry about it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're on the main like yeah, you are same, drive
Speaker 1: like no, no, like a highway basic and they like
Speaker 1: drive fast. And I'm like that parent that you're that one.
Speaker 1: I'm the old lady in the neighborhood. That's like waving
Speaker 1: my hand. Yeah. But it's like your kids live here.
Speaker 1: We had so many kids that run around in here
Speaker 1: that I just am like, you know, so I put
Speaker 1: my little uh turtle, I love your turtle with the
Speaker 1: flag in the middle of the street. You got one
Speaker 1: to um. All I can think about right now is
Speaker 1: I was not allowed to talk to boys on the phone.
Speaker 1: It was fifth grade. I remember I was ten. Fifth grade.
Speaker 1: A boy called this is back in the day when
Speaker 1: like the answering machine. That was the worst. When you're
Speaker 1: sitting for dinner and then all of a sudden, it's like, hey,
Speaker 1: it's Sam just calling. And I'm like, Sam looked really
Speaker 1: pretty today, choir, but go ahead, um. But Chris Blank
Speaker 1: called me. I just remember, and I don't remember what
Speaker 1: he wanted, but I remember my mom. Well, I went
Speaker 1: to the other room to get it. I remember walking
Speaker 1: in the hallway and her meeting me in the hallway.
Speaker 1: I mean, like, why was he calling? And I made
Speaker 1: up a lie like he needed something for school. Well,
Speaker 1: she was listening the entire time on the other way
Speaker 1: in Mine's not liar liar pants on fire? Yeah, Chris
Speaker 1: l Guys, Maggie went out on Broadway the other day.
Speaker 1: She did? She did you guys ready for a few
Speaker 1: of that? I have not, so I only listened to
Speaker 1: one of them. But are you ready? She's precious. Here
Speaker 1: we go. I've got the videos too, And this is
Speaker 1: gonna just be one second. I mean, this is I'm
Speaker 1: gonna show this video. I mean she's she's a bridesmaid.
Speaker 1: She's got some purple hair. Wait was she really a bridesmaid? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I mean she's wearing the I feel like you can't
Speaker 1: wear the t R if you're not a bridesmaid? What
Speaker 1: I didn't if she was like posing maid? What do
Speaker 1: you mean bridesmaid? Because this is the most okay, But
Speaker 1: if you're in Nashville, this is a very undercover look.
Speaker 1: If you didn't want to be noticed because a bridesmaid
Speaker 1: except ath Carolina Eline, what is your biggest dick in
Speaker 1: a relationship when they don't know how to clean up
Speaker 1: after themselves in the dishwasher, put your close in the hammer, right,
Speaker 1: it's not that difficult. I agree, don't you agree? I
Speaker 1: do agree wholeheartedly. Payton. And my question is what is
Speaker 1: a good agent? Get married? Oh? Pay good question? Pay In?
Speaker 1: Do you know my gutens was it? Never? Never? Never? Run? Payton? No?
Speaker 1: What is your I would say thirty two. That was
Speaker 1: my first divorce. I mean I would say thirty two
Speaker 1: or thirty five, Like I like thirty five, I feel
Speaker 1: thirty five. I don't know, because there's things I liked
Speaker 1: about being like well, having kids early, being married early,
Speaker 1: but having kids early. Um, but i'd say, like twenty
Speaker 1: eight to thirty. I still think I would have dined.
Speaker 1: I want you to be like solidly in your thirties. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I need a solid thirty two because yeah, the food.
Speaker 1: But it also depends where you're at, right, So like
Speaker 1: I wasn't fully there yet, but I don't think you
Speaker 1: really get there till your thirties anyways. Maybe I don't know.
Speaker 1: But then when you look a cat, well I was
Speaker 1: like this at eighteen, so like you know, like old,
Speaker 1: like acting grandma at the age of eighteen, but most
Speaker 1: people are. I do think it just matters. I think
Speaker 1: it matters what you know to be sure of about yourself. Yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure. M like I I knew when I was
Speaker 1: getting married the first time it was not the time
Speaker 1: same and I look back and I'm like why, But
Speaker 1: it was like such a smart choice, like to people's plans,
Speaker 1: that was mine. Oh yep, staying on branded people. This
Speaker 1: question is from from from from Broadway. Hi, I'm store
Speaker 1: me up from South Carolina, and my question is way
Speaker 1: in a relationship should you use are doing your partners laundry? Never? Ever?
Speaker 1: Also never never, someone's gonna wrap that up never never
Speaker 1: never a right three nevers And that was good from Broadway.
Speaker 1: I like personally, like I have I done? No, I
Speaker 1: haven't done Alan's laundry. H Allen strikes me as a
Speaker 1: do it yourself first and he does his laundry, and
Speaker 1: I think he's thrown mine in a few times. Oh
Speaker 1: he did. He threw mine in and then he left
Speaker 1: it kind of in a pile, the dry pile. And
Speaker 1: I don't like the dry pile because then it's then
Speaker 1: it's wrinkled. So I'm like in my mind, I'm like,
Speaker 1: let's I didn't say anything because it's like great is
Speaker 1: sweet thought at the same time, like I will just
Speaker 1: rewash it. M go, don't touch my stuff. I shouldn't
Speaker 1: be married. I don't. I'm probably just pregnant and tired.
Speaker 1: But I really this person to his own laundry he
Speaker 1: does now do it. I will I do all of
Speaker 1: ours if his isn't there to do. But he's usually
Speaker 1: in and out repacking so quick that he's like let
Speaker 1: me to he just does allowed. I have a question though,
Speaker 1: because you do the kids laundry? Do you do the
Speaker 1: kids lundry? Yeah? Yeah, same obviously. Yeah, it'd be nice
Speaker 1: if they would. I know you're still gonna say no
Speaker 1: to this, but we have to do like double laundry,
Speaker 1: so it would be nice if they picked up the
Speaker 1: slack too. I'm about to cast my husband publicly go
Speaker 1: work because he's like I caught us up on laundry
Speaker 1: the other day and I was like, okay, dry pile,
Speaker 1: heaping dry pile on top of like the laundry room counter,
Speaker 1: and I was like, so that's not caught up. Caught
Speaker 1: up to me is like those items are then in
Speaker 1: their room and roy GBIV in the closet hanging that's
Speaker 1: caught up. So those are done, but those are not folded,
Speaker 1: and they're not put in a basket, and they're not
Speaker 1: up to the next level. Mine get folded on the
Speaker 1: kitchen table. Okay, Sota doesn't put him step put it away?
Speaker 1: No no, no really. Now, if I'm like in the
Speaker 1: middle of putting up a bunch of laundry and I say, hey,
Speaker 1: can you help me take some of this up? Like
Speaker 1: take he will. But in his defense, the girls are
Speaker 1: pretty much the same size. They're literally like small medium,
Speaker 1: you know whatever. It makes me more mad when he
Speaker 1: puts it up, So I'm fine with that that I
Speaker 1: would like it in the basket. But he can't even
Speaker 1: separate the girls. He literally doesn't know who's who's and
Speaker 1: the girls at all. Yeah, Like I find my t
Speaker 1: shirts and loves pile and I'm just like, so that's
Speaker 1: just gonna get frustrated. So I am thankful for the
Speaker 1: folding though. That's nice. Yeah, the dry pile is like
Speaker 1: all done. I was like, um, I go in and
Speaker 1: Everest is like staring at me. Cool. Sometimes I'm guilty
Speaker 1: of that with nixt laundry though, because I need to
Speaker 1: move on from his and it's still in the dryer.
Speaker 1: So sometimes i'll do the dry pile you dry pilot
Speaker 1: sometimes only sometimes I appreciate No, it's not mean I
Speaker 1: appreciate alan though. I'll sit down on the couch and
Speaker 1: I'll start folding the kids clothes or my clothes or whatever,
Speaker 1: and he immediately grabs something and I go no, no, no no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no no. He's like, let me help. He's like,
Speaker 1: I'm just saying like no. And then now I don't
Speaker 1: say no, I'm just like good, like sure, like if
Speaker 1: that's so sweet. He doesn't have to I'm not asking
Speaker 1: him to, but I just I appreciate the well. And
Speaker 1: I think at the end of the day, like if
Speaker 1: they're willing to help and they're trying to help, even
Speaker 1: if they don't know the way, that we should appreciate that.
Speaker 1: And I know it's not easy to do all the time,
Speaker 1: especially for me. I think it's it's uh, I like,
Speaker 1: and this is something I'll say too, where I like,
Speaker 1: like he's seen in the mornings, that's the very first
Speaker 1: thing I do as I empty the dishwasher, very first thing,
Speaker 1: same human because I don't like a dish in my
Speaker 1: saying right. And I know we talked about this before,
Speaker 1: but um, so that's the very first thing that I do.
Speaker 1: So that way the kids can then put their their
Speaker 1: stuff in the in the dishwasher. Um. And you know,
Speaker 1: one of the mornings I had was just like running
Speaker 1: late or whatever. That was the first thing that he did.
Speaker 1: So I was like he it's like he saw like
Speaker 1: my routine and like I was just like oh. I
Speaker 1: ended up being like thank you for that, like you
Speaker 1: would you saw what I do and then you yeah,
Speaker 1: I did it without even like asking her, because that's
Speaker 1: the something I don't like when people ask questions. Just
Speaker 1: just do it because when you ask, I'm like, no, no no,
Speaker 1: I got it. Yeah, always I got it, and then
Speaker 1: I'm tired. I got it. But what I mean to
Speaker 1: say is when I say I got it, I mean
Speaker 1: yes please. Yeah. When I say I got it'd be
Speaker 1: like ike out yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. When I say
Speaker 1: I got it, I got it, that's yeah. That's that's
Speaker 1: where you have to ask for I'm trying to get
Speaker 1: better by asking. I think we should get better at
Speaker 1: saying yes please. Yeah. I'm trying really hard because you
Speaker 1: almost can't get mad at the other person if they oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: no they don't. And then but then you're frustrated because
Speaker 1: it's like, but I really wanted you to do do. I'm
Speaker 1: up in third times a charm and by the third baby,
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna be like, yes, I'll take any help
Speaker 1: you can give me. I thought you talking about my marriages.
Speaker 1: Oh no, this is the final marriage? Oh amen, mine marriage?
Speaker 1: Or do you have any y? No? It was like, no, honey,
Speaker 1: I'm settled into mine. How has anyone had therapy with
Speaker 1: Amy lately? You guys are so much to unpack. I
Speaker 1: haven't even processed. Huh. Oh. I got in the car.
Speaker 1: It was one of those where I just got in
Speaker 1: the car, very grateful, heart very heavy, very grateful, very empowering,
Speaker 1: very tiring. And I got in the car and I
Speaker 1: didn't even want the air the sound of the fanom.
Speaker 1: I just drove and drank water and was like, okay,
Speaker 1: Like it's a lot my voyage of not trusting people
Speaker 1: or men, right, right? Did you do MDR today? I
Speaker 1: did a lot of big MDAR. If I could frame
Speaker 1: it for you guys, I would frame it. Maybe by
Speaker 1: next week I can frame it it was just a lot.
Speaker 1: Well let's put a little pin pin in that one
Speaker 1: because we can. Yeah, something came up. I had therapy
Speaker 1: yesterday with Amy and I cried a lot. I cried,
Speaker 1: but it was something where yeah, it was just hard.
Speaker 1: So anything else, Nope, we'll pin it too. Let's pin it.
Speaker 1: Let's pin it. It's a lot to digest, like that's
Speaker 1: the hardest part and a lot of like big revelations.
Speaker 1: But then also just like, holy cow, I'm writing a
Speaker 1: note for for ourselves to unpin therapy talk. Yeah, therapy,
Speaker 1: but we're gonna switch gears because we have Heidi Pratt
Speaker 1: coming on and I know you were a big Hills watcher.
Speaker 1: I was. I watched uh some of it. I was
Speaker 1: a Laguna Hills. Yeah, you know, we have Jason Waller
Speaker 1: coming on, like he's gonna be sitting on the couch
Speaker 1: with us. It's not crushy how I feel. It's just
Speaker 1: I get excited Jason. Yeah, definitely not crushy. No no, no,
Speaker 1: you're married, right. But I mean also, even if I
Speaker 1: never had a cry, I don't have a lot of
Speaker 1: celebrity crush It's fun. Fact, do you have one? I
Speaker 1: had Matthew McConaughey, who I did too the greatest, And
Speaker 1: then I heard he was stinky stinky. I didn't believe whatever,
Speaker 1: It's probably just a rumor, but I needed something to
Speaker 1: break my healthy obsession, so that was fine. Can we
Speaker 1: just say something about the natural deodor and thing for
Speaker 1: a second. It doesn't work well, So I'm really stinky,
Speaker 1: Like I'm a naturally stinky person. I still have like
Speaker 1: PTSD from X because I was He'd like, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I know, I just feel like I never like so
Speaker 1: I'd always like I know, I'd literally never noticed it
Speaker 1: all the time. Like he I don't know, maybe he
Speaker 1: just like hated me so much, but like I like
Speaker 1: even my sense disgusted him. But like, I mean that
Speaker 1: was like to the point where like Alan's like you
Speaker 1: always smell so good, and I'm in my mind, I'm like,
Speaker 1: are you just saying that because I stink, Like because
Speaker 1: I'm just so ingrained that, like I have a bad
Speaker 1: odor or something. So I'm like constantly like putting on
Speaker 1: deodor and like all the time. And um So, but
Speaker 1: there was this girl that worked, do't I don't I
Speaker 1: say this? She was um at the house helping and
Speaker 1: she wore a natural doutor. And again, some natural deodorants
Speaker 1: might work for some people, but a lot of times
Speaker 1: if you have that stink, what I've noticed is you're
Speaker 1: just gonna it's gonna come out like pregnant. I it's
Speaker 1: work well, and so yeah, and so I smell and
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's to the point where you can't even
Speaker 1: You're like, like you can't breathe. And it's like and
Speaker 1: I'm very like smelly sensitive. And Jason's the same thing.
Speaker 1: He's like, mom, what stinks? And I'm like, But then
Speaker 1: when the person link sits on my couch and puts
Speaker 1: their arm like I'm the thing, and I was like
Speaker 1: and I was done, and I had to I had
Speaker 1: to let the person go because I stunk. I couldn't say, like,
Speaker 1: can you put on deodorant? How do how do you
Speaker 1: have that conversation. It's interesting to me when people can't
Speaker 1: smell themselves. I smell myself when I'm stinky, and then
Speaker 1: I usually I would say, oh, I'm probably stinky. I'm
Speaker 1: so paranoid about it. I'm not even that stinky. Really,
Speaker 1: I just do my thing, and you will not me
Speaker 1: doing natural deodorant because I have just I tried every
Speaker 1: single one of them. I did three years natural deodorant.
Speaker 1: None of it works for me my body chemistry. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well that just went. Whyever we even get to deodorant.
Speaker 1: Matthew McConaughey was not stinky. I don't know that Pert
Speaker 1: ever smelled him in real life. Given the opportunity, I
Speaker 1: would have loved the opportunity at once upon a time.
Speaker 1: But do you have a celebrity crush? I used to
Speaker 1: owe him and he's talked about that. But I don't
Speaker 1: have a whole lot either. Yeah, it takes a lot
Speaker 1: for me. Yeah, well, anybody anyways, moving on, we're gonna
Speaker 1: get heidion. She married her celebrity crush, she sure did,
Speaker 1: and we're gonna talk all things. Well. Hello, hey girl,
Speaker 1: Hey did you just get didn't work out? You're in
Speaker 1: your cute little like matching yoga set. Thank you. I'm
Speaker 1: trying to get it in, but it's hard with feeding
Speaker 1: and running around with this baby. And how's the baby now?
Speaker 1: He's four months? Are you sleeping? I'm more than with Gunner.
Speaker 1: So if I get like two hours straight three, I'm good.
Speaker 1: It's crazy how we get so sleep deprived that I
Speaker 1: feel like once we can get like a good two
Speaker 1: or three hour chunk, then we start to feel like
Speaker 1: we could run for office. Like it's like I got it,
Speaker 1: no big deal. Spencer's like, oh, I woke up once
Speaker 1: last night. I'm like, who are you talking to? Hi?
Speaker 1: What do you mean? That's when I say to my husband, respectfully,
Speaker 1: stop talking. Stop talking, girl. Thank you so much for
Speaker 1: coming on the podcast. So a funny story we like,
Speaker 1: and you will not remember this, but we met. Oh god,
Speaker 1: how many years ago is that? I mean god, I'm
Speaker 1: sam almost forty. I was like maybe twenty four, Like
Speaker 1: I mean a long, long, long, long time ago. We
Speaker 1: were at some club on sunset. It was you and Spencer,
Speaker 1: and then someone set me and Brody up on a
Speaker 1: blind date. So we're at this dinner and it was
Speaker 1: like the worst. You were so sweet, but it was
Speaker 1: the worst blind date ever with me and Brody, Like
Speaker 1: the absolute worst, and the worst thing about it was
Speaker 1: Probably one of my most embarrassing moments was that night,
Speaker 1: because I was like, just we were not vibing at all,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, he said he said something to me.
Speaker 1: I was like, that's it, I'm leaving. But there were
Speaker 1: mirrors on the walls. Okay, so I kind of get
Speaker 1: up in what we had already finished our dinner, right
Speaker 1: and like you guys were like somewhere or whatever. We
Speaker 1: were sitting out like in a booth area or whatever,
Speaker 1: and he had said something to me, and I was
Speaker 1: like whatever, Like I'm out of here. So I go
Speaker 1: marching towards the exit sign. Well, little do I know,
Speaker 1: the exit sign walks me right in. It's the reflection.
Speaker 1: It was all a mirror, and so I slam I
Speaker 1: walk right into like a mirror. It's horrible. Was that
Speaker 1: it was the one lacross from like the Shell station
Speaker 1: on like Laurel Canyon, was the one right on the
Speaker 1: right set. So when you'd come, if you're coming away
Speaker 1: from the valley, knows the other one like the other
Speaker 1: privilege privilege, yeah or whatever, Like it was like that was,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, it was so embarrassing. And that's the
Speaker 1: last I saw of you or not did you just
Speaker 1: turn around and walk the other way. I did not
Speaker 1: look back to see if someone saw me. Oh, but
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure someone saw me walk right into that mirror.
Speaker 1: I felt like I was in a funny house, Like
Speaker 1: I was thinking that a fun house. Fun house, yeah,
Speaker 1: funny whatever, fun Okay, But the transition to two have
Speaker 1: you found it to be difficult or where are you at?
Speaker 1: Because I struggled with the transition to two And how
Speaker 1: old is Gunner? Let's start there, Okay, So Gunner is five,
Speaker 1: which I was at first really concerned that he got
Speaker 1: to be too far of an age difference because my
Speaker 1: sister and I are three years and I wanted them
Speaker 1: to kind of kind of like grow up closer and
Speaker 1: to have each other in the house longer. But five
Speaker 1: years has been great. I can't imagine having him younger
Speaker 1: because Gunner is a lot, but you know, like he
Speaker 1: wants so much of our attention and we've given it
Speaker 1: to him so much for five years, and writer he's
Speaker 1: fitting right in. So I think when he gets a
Speaker 1: little older and there's more of a schedule, it will
Speaker 1: be great. But this newborn stage has been a little challenging,
Speaker 1: and Spencer's really stepped out and been so great at
Speaker 1: doing a lot with Gunner. But I feel guilty that
Speaker 1: I'm not there as much with him, because like I'm
Speaker 1: the one who woke up with him all the time,
Speaker 1: and I'm the one who would make sure to put
Speaker 1: him to bed last. And you know, I just had
Speaker 1: so much in my life revolving around Gunner. So Gunner's
Speaker 1: done a really good job transitioning. But I feel like
Speaker 1: for me, it's just it is hard being fouled in
Speaker 1: the two directions. But I love it too, It's sure,
Speaker 1: it's I love chaos and challenges obviously, Well girl, I
Speaker 1: mean you've lived You've lived a lot of that very publicly, right,
Speaker 1: so I feel like you're probably an expert on it.
Speaker 1: And I'm curious, like with all the you know, new
Speaker 1: streaming platforms and you know, the people doing the podcast
Speaker 1: and talking about the hills, and it is it hard
Speaker 1: for you to have to kind of hear or relive
Speaker 1: things or you kind of like whatever, that's the past
Speaker 1: and this is who I am today, and like, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to let that affect where I've gone. I
Speaker 1: think it's both because obviously, when you're doing like a
Speaker 1: recap of a show, you're kind of having to like
Speaker 1: go back and live things and moments that you wouldn't.
Speaker 1: But in my everyday life it doesn't affect me because
Speaker 1: I have the friends that I have, I have my marriage.
Speaker 1: I mean, we've been together for sixteen years. You know,
Speaker 1: we have two kids. I have a great family, so
Speaker 1: my everyday life, it doesn't affect me. But then when
Speaker 1: sometimes people bring it up where you have to talk
Speaker 1: about certain things, obviously God brings it up. Are you pregnant?
Speaker 1: I am so pregnant. I feel so extra pregnant in
Speaker 1: this moment. Actually, I feel stuck in my body. Is
Speaker 1: it obvious that I'm stuck in my body hiding because
Speaker 1: I I wouldn't even know unless you were rocking and
Speaker 1: holding your stomach, because from here pregnant at all. But
Speaker 1: then I'm seeing the rocking and well, the baby is
Speaker 1: like really in this moving stage that I just feel
Speaker 1: like one of us is dedicated to you and the
Speaker 1: other one of us is having a full blown party
Speaker 1: in my abdomen. So I'm trying so hard congraduations. We're
Speaker 1: not finding out it's our third So this has been
Speaker 1: really fun, but I'm it's interesting because I have a
Speaker 1: four year old boy. Janna and I our girls are
Speaker 1: three weeks apart and our boys are three months apart,
Speaker 1: so we live very similar life. So I need her
Speaker 1: to catch up with me and get on the third quickly.
Speaker 1: So we're not so distant, but my son will be
Speaker 1: almost five. So it's interesting to hear you talk about
Speaker 1: Gunner like, you know, because they are like the little
Speaker 1: loves of our lives. My daughter is older and I'm
Speaker 1: obsessed with my son, and I just can't imagine having
Speaker 1: another boyfriend. So that's got to open your heart in
Speaker 1: a different way. It's so true. This morning, Spencer said something.
Speaker 1: He was like, you're not stressing me out or whatever,
Speaker 1: because he just got his blood taken and he's like
Speaker 1: too stressed out. And I was like, you know, that's
Speaker 1: an internal conversation. I don't mean you like saying that
Speaker 1: I am stressing you out and that you're not stressed
Speaker 1: out and anyway, right or Gunner goes up and punches
Speaker 1: Spencer and it's like, don't talk to my mom like that.
Speaker 1: That's right, and in my mind and I try to
Speaker 1: be like, I don't think you just stick up for me,
Speaker 1: but thank you. And I was like this form, I'm
Speaker 1: not saying anything, Just get in the car, thank you.
Speaker 1: I love you. Come that's right. I'll be his client.
Speaker 1: That's fine. I love it with you, with you and Spencer,
Speaker 1: you know, being married for sixteen years, so wait, that
Speaker 1: together for how long? Then together for sixteen, married for fourteen,
Speaker 1: Mary Fortune, sixteen fortune. Okay, but I feel like when
Speaker 1: you guys got married, there was so much like, oh,
Speaker 1: this isn't gonna last. So now that you hit like
Speaker 1: your fourteen are you kind of like middle finger to people?
Speaker 1: I always felt that way. So I always felt like
Speaker 1: I had nothing to prove with Spencer, and I just,
Speaker 1: you know, I understand why people have thought that way
Speaker 1: because on camera, and we were paid to have like
Speaker 1: a very tumultuous relationship on camera, and so I see
Speaker 1: why people thought that. But our real life was just
Speaker 1: so different. So I knew our real relationship that we had,
Speaker 1: like I would never have put up with any of that.
Speaker 1: I would never have been in a relationship or like
Speaker 1: my fiance is flirting with a girl in the club,
Speaker 1: you know, like I have a zero tolerance policy. So
Speaker 1: in real life it was just completely different. So it's
Speaker 1: almost like we went on camera, you know, which obviously
Speaker 1: you're an actress and you guys know, you know, it's
Speaker 1: it's kind of acting, but then it bleeds into your
Speaker 1: real life with people thinking that, and then you're really
Speaker 1: kind of like that, well too far, You know. So anyways,
Speaker 1: it was a balance. But my real life, I always
Speaker 1: how we were and how I felt, and I just
Speaker 1: knew it was a one time soulmate marriage that we
Speaker 1: would you know, we'd have forever. So I just always
Speaker 1: felt that way. But what area do you guys struggle
Speaker 1: in the most? Like when you're like, oh, we keep
Speaker 1: coming back to this one issue. Parenting is definitely tricky,
Speaker 1: you know. It just takes your relationship to a whole
Speaker 1: new level. So it's like, well, not only do I
Speaker 1: need to confront you about this, I have to advocate
Speaker 1: for this little child, you know. And you both want
Speaker 1: the right thing, and you both have different ways of
Speaker 1: doing things. You know. I'm from a small town in
Speaker 1: Colorado with my mom who is like very strict, zero policy,
Speaker 1: you know, and Spencer wants to be fun dad. And
Speaker 1: then when you're fun dad, the child doesn't give you
Speaker 1: the same amount of respect that they're getting long because
Speaker 1: I am not going to take things, you know. So
Speaker 1: he's like he only listens to you, and I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: maybe you should not be so fun. And also parent
Speaker 1: is the most challenging. But I had to have a
Speaker 1: conversation when we first became parents, and it becomes more
Speaker 1: relevant every year, is that we're the team. We have
Speaker 1: some kind of division, we need to talk about it
Speaker 1: later or something like that, but for the benefit of
Speaker 1: our child too, like we need to stand together. And
Speaker 1: he's really come around to that. That's great. Spencer is
Speaker 1: fun dad. Fun dad is really into hummingbirds. Can we
Speaker 1: talk about it at all? Are we just not gonna
Speaker 1: do that? I mean, I'm fascinated watching these videos, Like no,
Speaker 1: it's crazy, like what is he doing? He's like a whisperer.
Speaker 1: What is he even doing? Heidi? You know, it was
Speaker 1: actually it's like a divine intervention because when I found
Speaker 1: out that I was pregnant, we had one hummingbird at
Speaker 1: our old house. We found this hummingbird nest and it
Speaker 1: was so symbolic, like, oh, we're having a baby and
Speaker 1: we just found this nest. And then one got eaten
Speaker 1: and one lived and we had to rescue the hummingbird
Speaker 1: and it was this whole thing. And then we moved
Speaker 1: here and there were a lot of hummingbirds at this house,
Speaker 1: and so Spencer already knew so much about them, and
Speaker 1: he makes hummingbird nectar every day, which is sugar water
Speaker 1: because the red dyet is poisonous for them actually like
Speaker 1: kills them. So he makes it fresh every day and
Speaker 1: then they just come and then he goes out there
Speaker 1: with his feeders and they love it. And now Gunner's
Speaker 1: in on it. It's like a whole operation. White you're
Speaker 1: up too, I know, it's like a whole thing. And
Speaker 1: you never and they get in the house and then
Speaker 1: you have to like capture the hummingbird, but the right way,
Speaker 1: and it's like, it's just it's the way I don't
Speaker 1: know about them in the house. It's interesting because I
Speaker 1: was a hills watcher, so Spencer was always the villain. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, well, you just can't they get
Speaker 1: they all have to shut up now because I always
Speaker 1: the hummingbird whisper. It's like you, I mean, what is
Speaker 1: more opposite day than the villain the guy that's literally
Speaker 1: holding hummingbird babies in his hand like he obviously has
Speaker 1: good energy. The hummingbirds are Yeah, so we shut that down.
Speaker 1: I love it. Do you do you even like talking
Speaker 1: about the hills um Yes and no. I think that
Speaker 1: love the ad by the way. I appreciate the and
Speaker 1: I've got an ant I have an ampersand on it
Speaker 1: because I always think that it's not a butt, it's
Speaker 1: always an ant and I love you, love your ants
Speaker 1: totally thank you for the acknowledgment. I strategically also use
Speaker 1: the ants. Yeah, it's a twofold. It's tricky because people
Speaker 1: are so team Lauren and they're kind of brainwashed to like,
Speaker 1: no matter what she did, there was never a problem,
Speaker 1: and I was the bad guy and that's how it was.
Speaker 1: So it's really ingrained in a lot of people's mind.
Speaker 1: But then interestingly enough, with TikTok and all this new generation,
Speaker 1: a lot of people watch it with a different perspective
Speaker 1: and they're like, whoa, who is this Lauren girl? And
Speaker 1: you know, it's definitely changed it. And then also it's
Speaker 1: hard with Spencer because I understand why people get worked
Speaker 1: up or think the way that they did because it
Speaker 1: was such a fake relationship. I mean, like some things
Speaker 1: in the beginning were real, like you know, real relationships
Speaker 1: have rockyness. Thank god they didn't show me being like
Speaker 1: a player also because as I totally was, And it
Speaker 1: just gets tricky. But at the same time, I'm so
Speaker 1: thankful over the Hills and it was such a blessing,
Speaker 1: and I met the love of my life. And I'll
Speaker 1: always have a place in my heart for Lauren, and
Speaker 1: I appreciate the friendship we did have and what she
Speaker 1: did do for me and letting me be on our show.
Speaker 1: So it was such a fun moment in time, and
Speaker 1: also it was very challenging. Sure, if there's I mean,
Speaker 1: you know, obviously it's not good to have regrets, right,
Speaker 1: but if there's, is there a moment that you can
Speaker 1: go back to and go, I really wish I would
Speaker 1: have done this differently, or I wouldn't have done or
Speaker 1: you know, not do this. I wish I never brought
Speaker 1: my family on the hills. We should have had a
Speaker 1: no family policy. I didn't see that happening the way
Speaker 1: it did. It just caused a lot of miscommunication between
Speaker 1: like my mom and I and my sister and I
Speaker 1: because the producers would tell you one thing and then
Speaker 1: you'd all kind of go in with the plan. I'm like, Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: you can say this, and you know, because in real life,
Speaker 1: my mom loves Spencer and there was never a problem.
Speaker 1: But then when we started like acting out that she
Speaker 1: didn't like him, then it was kind of like, wait
Speaker 1: a minute, Mom, why did you say that? And she's like,
Speaker 1: I don't said to say something, and then it caused
Speaker 1: it's actual turmoil when there was no problem, and then
Speaker 1: it just led to a lot of unnecessary, real hurts.
Speaker 1: So I think that if I could do one thing,
Speaker 1: it would have just been not including It was tricky though,
Speaker 1: because the producers were like, well, you guys don't have
Speaker 1: a storyline and you're not going to get paid, and
Speaker 1: you're not going to be on the show because no
Speaker 1: one will film with you because Laurence told all the
Speaker 1: casts not to film with you guys anymore. So you've
Speaker 1: got to bring your mom on and or find something.
Speaker 1: So I was just put in a hard position, especially
Speaker 1: at twenty and not having a good not having an
Speaker 1: Asian manager, lawyer, not anyone. I mean, Spencer was my soundboard.
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, what are we complaying? You know, So
Speaker 1: it was hard not having a team or anyone to
Speaker 1: help guide us through that time. Right as you were
Speaker 1: saying that, I question him. To my mind, I'm like,
Speaker 1: do I ask it? Because if someone asked me the question,
Speaker 1: I would have a hard time. I don't know if
Speaker 1: i'd answer it. As well, from being on a show, right,
Speaker 1: So it's like I think back to, like, you know,
Speaker 1: one of my shows that I was on, if there
Speaker 1: was a person from that show that you'd be fine
Speaker 1: with never talking to ever again, Like the one person
Speaker 1: that you were like would would never want to talk
Speaker 1: to again and be like totally fine with it, Like
Speaker 1: if there was one that you could say, I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm fine with never talking to a few people. One
Speaker 1: is there a narrowing people out? I know that's the thing.
Speaker 1: I was like, what I even narrow that because it's
Speaker 1: like I know mine, like you know, and so it's
Speaker 1: like it's interesting because it's like it's not it's not
Speaker 1: even like a mean girl thing. It's just like I
Speaker 1: choose to not let that kind of come into my
Speaker 1: life again and cause or me to feel X Y
Speaker 1: and Z and you were both like twenty doing the shows,
Speaker 1: like it's a different lifetime. Who's yours. We'll see. I've
Speaker 1: got a few I like, I know I do I
Speaker 1: have I do have one from from from One Tree Hill,
Speaker 1: But I should answer it, yeah, answer I know. I
Speaker 1: never if she did, I would, oh, she's going to show.
Speaker 1: I'd be fine never ever talking to um A few
Speaker 1: people on that show. So Lauren, I'm fine with never
Speaker 1: talking to Lauren again. We have gone our separate ways.
Speaker 1: Our lives are completely different. Um, so much has happened.
Speaker 1: I'm fine with never talking to her again. I'm fine
Speaker 1: with not talking to her little minions again, like, um,
Speaker 1: you know right, been there, So I'm fine with that.
Speaker 1: I'm fine with you know, I love Kristen Cavalary, so
Speaker 1: thankfully I do talk to her. Um. Yeah, and the reboot,
Speaker 1: I'd be fine not talking to like Ni Like most
Speaker 1: the cast, I sortly fine. I'm gonna take us to
Speaker 1: a healthier place. Okay, all right. I tried giving her
Speaker 1: and I tried to rescue this night. Is there anyone
Speaker 1: that you knew super super well during filming that you
Speaker 1: are like most proud of the person they are today? Good?
Speaker 1: Good question. Um. I love Jen Bunny. She and I
Speaker 1: have been my best friends since I was nineteen. We
Speaker 1: had a very similar thing like falling out with Lauren,
Speaker 1: and Lauren you know, kind of cut her off and gave,
Speaker 1: you know, treated her in a really unfair way, especially
Speaker 1: being best friends since they were in like preschool. Um,
Speaker 1: and she has become like a doctor and an incredible mom.
Speaker 1: I mean, she has all these accolades and I actually
Speaker 1: she has like a book coming out. So she's one
Speaker 1: of my closest friends. And I was so proud of
Speaker 1: her for the life that she did. She went to USC,
Speaker 1: She's incredibly smart, she's so sweet, she's a great wife,
Speaker 1: great mom. So I'm very proud of her. I like that.
Speaker 1: It's interesting to me to have you frame it. I
Speaker 1: don't want to pot start here, but this is something
Speaker 1: I've never quite heard it put this way that it
Speaker 1: was Lauren's show. Oh yeah, well wasn't it. Well never
Speaker 1: I would just see like some well it was obviously
Speaker 1: a main character. I don't know that like the viewers
Speaker 1: really saw it. No, we didn't see it. Like to me,
Speaker 1: you were just as much a main character as Lauren
Speaker 1: was as Audrina, Like you know what I mean, Like
Speaker 1: there was some of it was more dominantly obviously spaced
Speaker 1: towards her and times, but like, I remember you just
Speaker 1: as much as I remember her. But I'm going to
Speaker 1: back it up though, for you sex in the City
Speaker 1: who shows it. Wow, that's hard for me because we
Speaker 1: all know how Bradshaw I am. So I'm saying, so
Speaker 1: it's like she's like the Bradshaw of the Hills because
Speaker 1: I look at it and go, wait a minute, No,
Speaker 1: I didn't watch the show religiously. I saw some episodes,
Speaker 1: and I would say that she was the main character. Interesting. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so she was the narrator. It was her spin off
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be all about Lauren, and that was part
Speaker 1: of that's true. I guess that was part of the
Speaker 1: problem when we all had to start having more storylines, like,
Speaker 1: it wasn't supposed to be that way. It wasn't supposed
Speaker 1: to be like half the show about Spencer and I
Speaker 1: half the show about Lauren. And that became a problem
Speaker 1: for her and her team too. They're like, this is
Speaker 1: Lauren's show. And at a point MTV was like, well,
Speaker 1: you know, because Lauren's like, I'm going to quit the show,
Speaker 1: um if Heidie and Spencer are on it. And I
Speaker 1: think that was season three and so MTV told her
Speaker 1: to walk and they're like, well, a show without Heidie
Speaker 1: and Spencer anymore. And that became a really big division
Speaker 1: in within the show. Well, that's jealousy anytime you're done
Speaker 1: with ego. That's I mean, that's because she wasn't bringing
Speaker 1: enough of the what drama or whatever it was. I mean,
Speaker 1: that's her own, Like I would say, we all remember
Speaker 1: the mascara dripping moment. I well remember, And that was
Speaker 1: what was so unfortunate, is like I'm such a team
Speaker 1: player and I'm such a best friend rider die that
Speaker 1: I just want like the best for everyone, you know,
Speaker 1: And I don't know. I wasn't in her position, and
Speaker 1: it wasn't my show and I wasn't the narrator. But
Speaker 1: I'm just not really like that. So when she was
Speaker 1: like you need to stop dating Spencer and like all
Speaker 1: these hard things that started happening, I was like, wait
Speaker 1: a minute. You had a boyfriend that I didn't like
Speaker 1: that I had to live with for a year, and
Speaker 1: I would never have said to you like stop dating him,
Speaker 1: or we're not going to be friends or I don't
Speaker 1: want to hear about him. I'm like, that's the time
Speaker 1: you need me the most as a friend. That's when
Speaker 1: I need to step up. That's when you need your girl,
Speaker 1: That's when you need a shoulder to cry on at
Speaker 1: any time. Like I'm here for you whenever. However much
Speaker 1: time you want to spend with him, that's great, And
Speaker 1: I would stay at the apartment like half the time
Speaker 1: and really strategically make sure to have time with her
Speaker 1: because she did just go through a huge breakup a
Speaker 1: few months before, and you know, she was going through
Speaker 1: a hard time or you know, had just had gone
Speaker 1: through a hard time. So I spent like half my
Speaker 1: first Valentin's Dave with Spencer with Lauren, and she was
Speaker 1: still mad at me, and I was like, this is
Speaker 1: getting out of control, Like I'm sorry, There's not much
Speaker 1: more I can do at this point, and she just
Speaker 1: it was really unfortunate, and I was like, I didn't
Speaker 1: even think you were like this, and you know, that's
Speaker 1: that was the real division in our friendship, and so
Speaker 1: on cameras she started like kind of doing things and
Speaker 1: saying things and I had no idea. She was saying
Speaker 1: to MTV like I don't want hide on the show
Speaker 1: anymore and stuff like that. So it was unfortunate, the
Speaker 1: whole fallout of our friendship. And I know we were
Speaker 1: young and things like that, but it just I would
Speaker 1: never have been a friend like that to her. Sure,
Speaker 1: that's tough. That's I'm curious. Like with forgiveness too. We
Speaker 1: were talking about this one of our episodes, like where
Speaker 1: what's your stance on it, Like do you think is
Speaker 1: it forgetting? Like do you forgive or like what? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I think forgiveness is more for yourself, you know,
Speaker 1: Like I have love for Laura, and I really do.
Speaker 1: I appreciate all the time that we had. And you know,
Speaker 1: there's other people in my life too that I've hurt
Speaker 1: me as much or more than her. And it's all
Speaker 1: about moving forward in life because forgiveness only makes you
Speaker 1: feel bad. I'm sure that person doesn't even care anymore,
Speaker 1: you know. So I think forgiveness is super important for yourself.
Speaker 1: And you know, obviously I mean not obviously, but I
Speaker 1: also I am a Christian. I'm pretty spiritual, and I
Speaker 1: think that it's just a good thing to do, and
Speaker 1: I want to teach my kids to be that way
Speaker 1: and I want to model that myself. And sometimes forgiveness
Speaker 1: is constant. It's not like a one time, Oh I
Speaker 1: forgive you and now everything's fine. Like sometimes you get
Speaker 1: those feelings again and you get angry and you have
Speaker 1: to pray about it or talk about it or what
Speaker 1: meditate however people do, and it's like, Okay, actually I
Speaker 1: wish that person the best. I'm going to let that go.
Speaker 1: Maybe they're hurt, there's other things going on. So I
Speaker 1: think forgiveness is one of the most important parts of life,
Speaker 1: and it helps you to move forward in other relationships
Speaker 1: and it helps just it only helps what also factories,
Speaker 1: you know, boundaries are also really good. So with forgiveness
Speaker 1: does come boundaries, right, We're a big fan of boundaries
Speaker 1: in the share what do you do when you get stuck?
Speaker 1: Like how does Heidi? How does Heidie get out of
Speaker 1: a rut? When you know you're down about something or
Speaker 1: motherhood or things didn't even get that you know, show
Speaker 1: you on it, or like what do you what do
Speaker 1: you do to go okay? Like I'm gonna be okay.
Speaker 1: I'm very big into prayer, so even if it's like
Speaker 1: two minutes, so I'll just go pray about it. I
Speaker 1: think crying is great, I think so baptisting to cry
Speaker 1: and let it out, but just to take those that time,
Speaker 1: even with the kids, Like if I'm getting frustrated or
Speaker 1: i feel like, you know, if Gunner's having a tantrum
Speaker 1: and Rikers crying and Spencer saying something, I'm just like
Speaker 1: need to take a deep breath, let this out of
Speaker 1: my body, Like when you start feeling it, it's just
Speaker 1: time to kind of a little so care. So I
Speaker 1: think quick self care is an important thing because sometimes
Speaker 1: you don't have ten minutes to yourself. You know, it's like, okay,
Speaker 1: you just need thirty seconds to breathe. What is your
Speaker 1: top self care at this point? Like I know your postpartum,
Speaker 1: You're you've got five year old Gunner, You've got Spencer,
Speaker 1: who is a character in himself, Like, you've got a lot,
Speaker 1: You're living in a frat house essentially, So tell me,
Speaker 1: tell me if you get like five to ten minutes,
Speaker 1: we're praying, like is it running? Is it? Like? What
Speaker 1: is what is it for you? Right now? That just
Speaker 1: feels like okay. Back to Heidi. My favorite thing to
Speaker 1: do is be a nature So for me, it's like
Speaker 1: taking the dogs on a walk is the best because
Speaker 1: we live right by a trail and I can just
Speaker 1: like be up in the mountains quickly, So that is
Speaker 1: really important for me. I try to do that every day. Also,
Speaker 1: I can take Gunner up there and then he's like
Speaker 1: playing with sticks and trees, and then I can also
Speaker 1: just like look at the clouds and relax and right
Speaker 1: you're sleeping on me, so that's important for me. It's
Speaker 1: just being outside even for a little bit, and then
Speaker 1: I only get a short amount of prayer time, so
Speaker 1: I just try to do that even for like two
Speaker 1: minutes a day. But like you're saying right now, self cares,
Speaker 1: it's a little tricky. I'm trying to work out again, too,
Speaker 1: So three days a week, I'm trying to work out
Speaker 1: with a trainer and have that time, and I have
Speaker 1: a babysitter come because I don't want to rely on
Speaker 1: Spencer being able to deal with the baby crying because
Speaker 1: he like freaks out. So I'm like, all right, I
Speaker 1: don't need to deal with you and a baby crying
Speaker 1: and trying to work out, So self care sometimes it's
Speaker 1: just having someone come hold the baby. That preventative. It's
Speaker 1: preventative resentment disorder, is what I'm trying to. Like, I
Speaker 1: hire the help so I don't have to depend on you,
Speaker 1: so I can keep liking you and I can still
Speaker 1: work out. Okay, right, I'm with you. I can't remember
Speaker 1: if I said this on the show or I know
Speaker 1: I said it in therapy, but I've been struggling lately
Speaker 1: with prayer because I've been kind of, you know, frustrated
Speaker 1: with certain things like work wise, and so someone I
Speaker 1: think it was my therapist, she was like, you know,
Speaker 1: just asked like she's like, be really direct with your
Speaker 1: prayer with God. And so I I went up to
Speaker 1: my new house that's being built and I was standing
Speaker 1: there and you know, I started to pray. But then
Speaker 1: when I when I was praying, I was like, hey, God,
Speaker 1: like you know God, like I really like I would
Speaker 1: love this. But then I start I switched and I
Speaker 1: told my therapist. I was like, I stopped praying because
Speaker 1: but then I was like because I said, but I'm
Speaker 1: so grateful for my kids, and it's like I'm so
Speaker 1: grateful for this, And so then I felt bad asking
Speaker 1: for something because I've already been blessed with so much.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, how ungrateful am I? Then I'm asking
Speaker 1: for something even more when you've blessed me with this.
Speaker 1: So then I just spent like fifteen minutes like fighting
Speaker 1: myself and then be like all right, well whatever, like
Speaker 1: just do you just do you when you want to
Speaker 1: do you? And then like I was like it's gonna
Speaker 1: be on your time anyways, Okay, cool, Bye, like, but
Speaker 1: thanks for everything, like did you even talk to me?
Speaker 1: Because it feels like you had a one side of conversation.
Speaker 1: But I like was really battling with like asking for
Speaker 1: like you know, asking God for it, but then also
Speaker 1: like being like, but thank you so much for everything
Speaker 1: you've given me. So then I felt bad asking for more,
Speaker 1: like you how greedy of you? But then my therapist goes, well,
Speaker 1: why do you feel like you don't deserve more? And
Speaker 1: then I started like crying. That was like my you know,
Speaker 1: my whole belief, like well I don't I don't deserve
Speaker 1: the happy ending. I don't get the happy ending, like
Speaker 1: that just doesn't happen, like something will fall through, something
Speaker 1: will like not work like. And then she's like, but
Speaker 1: what if you can you can be grateful and also
Speaker 1: ask for more too, and so I yeah, and and
Speaker 1: but I would really like have found myself struggling with that,
Speaker 1: like with prayer. You know, sometimes I have been there myself,
Speaker 1: and also God has like convicted my heart sometimes to
Speaker 1: not ask for things, like I've gone to prayer and
Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, I need to ask for this.
Speaker 1: And then sometimes like when I have felt it as
Speaker 1: you're saying it's felt not right, Like, wait a minute,
Speaker 1: maybe I just need to pause and be in a
Speaker 1: season or just have a few days of gratitude and
Speaker 1: then come back to it. So I've also done that.
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, Actually, God just convicted me in January.
Speaker 1: He was like, just do a month of gratitude prayers.
Speaker 1: Because I always ask, I'm a big asker. I'm like,
Speaker 1: all right, Lord, oh maybe we're not lottery. Does I
Speaker 1: want it? And I'll do good things? You know? You know,
Speaker 1: so I'm like my mom nade the new house, come
Speaker 1: on talking. So I can't handle you. But sometimes also
Speaker 1: God has convicted me, like why don't you just take
Speaker 1: a few days or even like this moment and just
Speaker 1: relax and just grateful Because what God can work on
Speaker 1: in your heart with just gratitude sometimes leads you to
Speaker 1: a different ask. Right, So maybe whatever you're asking needs
Speaker 1: to be tweaked a little bit and by going back
Speaker 1: to gratitude and just praising and like I'll be like,
Speaker 1: thank you for my toes, thank you for the air
Speaker 1: and the oxygen. Thank you we're not having a new
Speaker 1: heal or war right now, you know, thank you. My
Speaker 1: kids have food, so sometimes it is those bags six
Speaker 1: that God just works on your heart in mysterious ways, Right,
Speaker 1: That's what's so cool about God, Like we don't know
Speaker 1: why he does things or what we're supposed to pray for.
Speaker 1: But sometimes it's just also an inner peace, Like maybe
Speaker 1: you're not having peace while you're asking for something and
Speaker 1: He just needs like to It's like an adjustment with
Speaker 1: a chiropractor. Maybe just needs to crack this little thing
Speaker 1: and then have you come an hour later. Maybe it's
Speaker 1: a few days later. I don't know, but I think
Speaker 1: that's interesting. Like when you're starting to feel conflicted with prayer,
Speaker 1: I think that's because that's God. Sometimes it's just like
Speaker 1: be still, like I am God, I got this, I
Speaker 1: know what you want. I have something better coming for you.
Speaker 1: So maybe I don't know, but it is always interesting
Speaker 1: to me. I love that, and thank you for speaking
Speaker 1: on it too. I love we Actually the guest before
Speaker 1: you on another episode we just talked about her faith,
Speaker 1: and it's just I love that people are talking about it.
Speaker 1: So I like conversational prayer too. That's something like I
Speaker 1: think we miss. I think we've think it has to
Speaker 1: be so officially started, so officially ending and so like
Speaker 1: I'll just be in my kitchen and I'm just like
Speaker 1: I feel sad, and I don't even necessarily ask for anything.
Speaker 1: I'm just like I want to tell you because I
Speaker 1: know you know, but also just because I want you
Speaker 1: to like do whatever, like so it's just like kind
Speaker 1: of conversational. I'm not it's like all day. I actually
Speaker 1: learned that when I was going through my divorce because
Speaker 1: I felt like lonely and I was like I kind
Speaker 1: of want to date God, which sounds weird, but then
Speaker 1: I would just be like, all right, what do I
Speaker 1: want to have for like, you know, just like kind
Speaker 1: of conversational and it feels a little less official, and
Speaker 1: then you don't feel like you have to request anything
Speaker 1: or maybe pinpoint of feeling and you can just say
Speaker 1: like this is it, like the beautiful surrender over and
Speaker 1: over again. I'm totally with you on that, Like Jesus
Speaker 1: is my best friend. That's how I feel, you know.
Speaker 1: And it says like like you're saying, I always am
Speaker 1: like the love of my life, You're the lover of
Speaker 1: my soul because nobody knows me deeper and more real
Speaker 1: and less judgmental, Like that's the thing I don't with
Speaker 1: Christianity or any spirituality. People are like so critical of it.
Speaker 1: It's like you're missing the whole point. It's not to
Speaker 1: be judgmental and critical like you're missing it, Like what
Speaker 1: on one, maybe go work on yourself there, but like
Speaker 1: maybe start a genesis. I don't know. Jecking got me
Speaker 1: okay on a major projections. I got something going on
Speaker 1: with God. Okay, we got our own deal here. But
Speaker 1: I'm with that all day. I'm just like, all right, God,
Speaker 1: help me find a parking spot, like I have this
Speaker 1: praper park. I'm like, however, I'm going through it like
Speaker 1: it doesn't happen Diesel official. It's more like a relationship.
Speaker 1: It's just like your friend hanging out with you. You know.
Speaker 1: I love it. Well, Heidi, thank you so much for
Speaker 1: coming on. I adore you. So. I'm glad we've met
Speaker 1: now in this stage of our lives and not me
Speaker 1: running into mirrors, mirror, not baby bird Janna hitting the mirror.
Speaker 1: I cannot wait to bring this up to Brodie too.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go yeah, buddy, yeah, and we're all in
Speaker 1: better places for what was so nice. Thank you guys
Speaker 1: for having me on and anytime you want mom talk anything,
Speaker 1: I'm fully here so I love it precious, all right,
Speaker 1: Thanks girl, appreciate you. Bye okay by girl hie girl