Speaker 1: This is cut to It with Steve Smith Senior at
Speaker 1: production of The Black Effect and I heart Radio. I'm
Speaker 1: Steve Smith Senior and I'm John And this is cut
Speaker 1: to it. Good do it, Good do it. They's getting
Speaker 1: down to do it. Good do it. We asked the
Speaker 1: questions you always want to know, but no one ever asked,
Speaker 1: let's cut to it. You ain't heard them about it?
Speaker 1: Then we're about to let you know. It's all yeah,
Speaker 1: we're on. We're on the skeleton crew right now. All right,
Speaker 1: watch how more efficient when we are? Sorry, hey, hey, hey,
Speaker 1: here you Harry. This is like your new tagline all
Speaker 1: of us. Where did you even come up with this? So?
Speaker 1: I love medieval shows like I love I love food.
Speaker 1: I am a fat guy sucking little guy's body. Um,
Speaker 1: I exercise to eat and so um I used to
Speaker 1: love why I love soured old French baggats is I
Speaker 1: love the like grab it, you know, just eat the
Speaker 1: eat the bread and right, and then they'll drink out
Speaker 1: how you explaining this? And we on the audio plan
Speaker 1: but I'm all into it. And then they have the
Speaker 1: like they have the glass and they drink the wine
Speaker 1: and then they use their farm to wipe off, and
Speaker 1: then they grab grapes and eat them. And then they're
Speaker 1: at the head of the table and he got his
Speaker 1: king on his kids queen on the right, and his
Speaker 1: his princess and his son. Did you ever watch Game
Speaker 1: of Thrones? Nope? So you like all that medieval stuff,
Speaker 1: and the biggest medieval show that I think is ever
Speaker 1: you never watched. I know what you're gonna say, Okay,
Speaker 1: they don't. I know, that's all I'm waiting. I'm allowing
Speaker 1: you to st your point. You kind so for letting
Speaker 1: me go after you. R and D not a cart
Speaker 1: jester um Bro. The Game of Thrones, like some other shows,
Speaker 1: the first couple of episodes off the charts with sexuality.
Speaker 1: I'm talking about especially. I'm talking about like I was
Speaker 1: watching it. I mean, first few episodes. First, the first
Speaker 1: thirty minutes of the of it's boob's laughing cheeks right,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, whoa, and I can't watch that show,
Speaker 1: Like that's the kind of show you're watching. The wife walks,
Speaker 1: you know, she walks into watching. Yeah, and you're like,
Speaker 1: luckily my wife was into it. But yeah, those first
Speaker 1: like three or four episodes a Game of Thrones it
Speaker 1: was extreme, and there's like some other points throughout having
Speaker 1: many season seven and eight seasons, it was some other ones.
Speaker 1: But oh yeah, the first three or four it was like,
Speaker 1: wait a minute, hbox, Not that I know it's a
Speaker 1: guy that looked like me, that it was little. It
Speaker 1: was a few times. And that's why funny. It's a
Speaker 1: safe place, man. Funniest thing. That's why I got basic cable.
Speaker 1: I have no Cinemax, no HBO, none, I have none
Speaker 1: that I got only only yes, only cable we have
Speaker 1: and channels we have is obviously I got the ticket
Speaker 1: to watch all the games on Sunday, but I don't
Speaker 1: have any I got basic cable. Here's why. First of all,
Speaker 1: I don't want to have to explain if you up
Speaker 1: in a liver room or in your man cave and
Speaker 1: he's just by yourself, you turn it on and all
Speaker 1: of a sudden the Thursday night when you as a kid,
Speaker 1: or Saturday night about twelve am, and you're like, I
Speaker 1: don't know what you're talking about. What I came on
Speaker 1: Thursday nights, I don't know what you're talking about. Starts
Speaker 1: with the all are e X I was he I
Speaker 1: was a young man and we had that blueleg cable
Speaker 1: or whatever real thing, and I am talking about real
Speaker 1: sports sneither right, man, yes, exactly right. And so I like, man,
Speaker 1: that's a hell of explanation. What you want flip it
Speaker 1: through that shuffle and trying to get to the remote.
Speaker 1: Gotta make sure you gut on that back, but make
Speaker 1: sure Nickelodeons on that last channel. So I just didn't
Speaker 1: want to. I didn't want to deal with that. And
Speaker 1: also too as adult man, I got three boys. Man,
Speaker 1: I also don't want to get up and them boys
Speaker 1: out there watching you do you don't want you want
Speaker 1: the apple to fall further from that tree? Yes, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want no fruit on that tree. Right. So
Speaker 1: that that's why. Um, but that's why I didn't watch
Speaker 1: Game of Thrones and I here's a great show, but
Speaker 1: just for my mental makeup, for my immentry, just to
Speaker 1: that stuff, I'm like, yeah, I can't do this, this,
Speaker 1: this ain't for me. I can't. But you gotta watch
Speaker 1: the first season and to get the concept of it.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I don't miss those first ones. You can
Speaker 1: forget about it. You trying to catch up. You ain't
Speaker 1: gonna make it. Yeah, I'm not gonna make it. So
Speaker 1: so here we are guestless episode. It's just me and you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: my no, we might know. Okay, let's go, let's get stuff.
Speaker 1: Be ready for that. So we are. We are unprepared,
Speaker 1: but we're just gonna win it. Okay, So get I stuff.
Speaker 1: This is a section where Steve you you're gonna do
Speaker 1: the intro. It's Steve ask you questions. He may or
Speaker 1: may not have a follow up question, but here it is.
Speaker 1: These are randomly selected questions. You, Gerard, do you know
Speaker 1: what these questions? Do not know what? The alright? You
Speaker 1: know the tagline? Folks, buckle up, butter cup click all right, Gerard,
Speaker 1: Now this paper is clear, but yet my mind it's
Speaker 1: going all right. Susa guacam Why? Um just preference. I
Speaker 1: don't really have a better. I don't have a better. No,
Speaker 1: I do like guacamole. I like it when it's fresh,
Speaker 1: and everyone doesn't make it the same. So the safe bet,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say sauce. So would you say suca guaca bag?
Speaker 1: Guacamole is the same as bad potato salad? Uh? That
Speaker 1: would require me to eat everybody's potato salad. And I'm
Speaker 1: raised better than that. My home training doesn't allow me
Speaker 1: to eat everybody's potato salad. You catch my weight. So
Speaker 1: that means your home train also or your adult training. Now,
Speaker 1: lets you know that everybody you don't try everybody's you
Speaker 1: don't try to hawk. Yeah, you know what the kind
Speaker 1: of guacamole I hate when you think it's fresh, but
Speaker 1: it squeeze. He's not the pre mad. Yeah, there's a
Speaker 1: couple where you can catch like some of your local
Speaker 1: grocery stores that we're not going to mention because you
Speaker 1: know they don't they don't sponsor us. But but there's
Speaker 1: there's a few that's out there that's fresh that you
Speaker 1: can that you can buy this package. But now we're
Speaker 1: gonna go with saucer. That's the safe. Okay. So let's
Speaker 1: ask you if you can only eat one thing for
Speaker 1: the rest of your life, what would that be? One
Speaker 1: thing for the rest of my life, one thing for
Speaker 1: the rest of my life. I'd say, I'm gonna sound
Speaker 1: like a sound like a fat kid, like to your
Speaker 1: to your point, fat kids stuck in the skinny skinny
Speaker 1: guy's body, Uh, pizza like pizza, So that that'd that'd
Speaker 1: be good. It's a little, a little good family meal.
Speaker 1: We try to get that every now and then. So
Speaker 1: I'll wrote with pizza. Now. I'm gonna be on carbo
Speaker 1: over though, but we're gonna roll with pizza. Nice safe
Speaker 1: bed like pizza too. Yeah, we love some pizza. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: you got a whole you got a whole oven over there.
Speaker 1: Hif Boyard thieves super Mario over there. Yeah, we do
Speaker 1: wings that you could do flat bread. You can do
Speaker 1: a lot of stuff in there at you so like, um,
Speaker 1: let's see, let's see, um, how many of these are doing?
Speaker 1: We're doing five? Just one more, just one more. And
Speaker 1: then you start talking about pizza and threw me off easy. Yeah, um,
Speaker 1: I'll go a pizza too. Let's see. All right, you
Speaker 1: only can have five items. You're going on a deserted island,
Speaker 1: five items for your survival. What do you pick? All right? Firestarter? Okay,
Speaker 1: we're gonna do um. We'll do machete, We'll do um,
Speaker 1: we'll do can I say, tent, it's whatever I want
Speaker 1: to bring it, right, it's your fire right tent that
Speaker 1: gives me shelter. So I got shelter, I got I
Speaker 1: got a weapon, I got firestarter. I gotta have a
Speaker 1: pot so you can boarder water because you can. I
Speaker 1: watch enough naked and afraid. If you don't boarder water,
Speaker 1: you're gon be sick. Uh. And then fifth one will
Speaker 1: do um cell phones so I can get the hell
Speaker 1: out of here, calls someone for help. You did so
Speaker 1: my minus minus firestarter machete as well I have. You
Speaker 1: can cut down everything with that machete and you can
Speaker 1: hunt with it. Yeah, you can't block I got. I
Speaker 1: would say, I would say pot as well, but I'm
Speaker 1: gonna throw I'm gonna throw one in there airplane so
Speaker 1: I can get the hell out. You already gassed up
Speaker 1: with a pilot. If you got the airplane, that means
Speaker 1: you don't even make it there right back, you're gonna
Speaker 1: be calling me. Wait you left me? I got my
Speaker 1: cell phone right all right? Cool? So man, you know, um,
Speaker 1: I thought this would be a good episode, you know,
Speaker 1: kind of talking about just more of the you know,
Speaker 1: everybody knows I played ball. Uh if you don't know,
Speaker 1: that's even perfect. I played uh sixteen years professionally for
Speaker 1: the Carolina Panthers and uh, the Baltimore Ravens and um,
Speaker 1: so it's keep pounding and ravens, ravens flock. Uh you know,
Speaker 1: once a raven, always a raven um and then um,
Speaker 1: you know, so we'll always talk about football, and football
Speaker 1: is obviously very heavy in my family. Sports is very
Speaker 1: heavy in my family. Dad plays in my pro. Mom
Speaker 1: ran track, Um, uncle rand track. It's in blood blood man,
Speaker 1: so you know, grandparents it was. It was really cool. However,
Speaker 1: there are let me ask this first. Is this a
Speaker 1: safe place? This is absolutely a safe place. I think
Speaker 1: I think we referenced that in the in the get
Speaker 1: iced up just now, But yes, this is a safe place. Brother.
Speaker 1: All right. So you know, I get people all the
Speaker 1: time saying, oh, I know you miss it, mhm miss
Speaker 1: what and what in reference and you're saying in reference
Speaker 1: to football, Yeah, yeah, yeah they I know you miss it.
Speaker 1: And now, just being retired and sitting back, there are
Speaker 1: some aspects of football that I miss and there's a
Speaker 1: lot more football I don't miss. What's what's the percentage
Speaker 1: of the what you're missing and what you don't know?
Speaker 1: I would what I miss? You missed? You miss the game? Yes?
Speaker 1: I missed the friendships. Um, sometimes I missed the the
Speaker 1: physicality of competition. Right, nothing can ever nothing can ever
Speaker 1: substitute like going against a guy he elbows you, you
Speaker 1: ever with him, and just kind of that that back
Speaker 1: and forth, that that that horsing around like you know
Speaker 1: guys horse around and you can you can you can
Speaker 1: get things out of you can you can legally, uh
Speaker 1: be be physical with someone and and and get that.
Speaker 1: So I relate. We had that conversation that part, but
Speaker 1: just more of the comp titition, like if you've competed
Speaker 1: in any level, you're always looking for that next competition, next,
Speaker 1: something that that that that drives you, that pushes you,
Speaker 1: something also that makes you extremely uncomfortable, something that you
Speaker 1: can you can look at the progress and go, I
Speaker 1: did that an achiever, Yes, something that you you know,
Speaker 1: athletes are always marked, thought about, measured by what they
Speaker 1: have done and also held take it, held back from
Speaker 1: things of what they were able not to do. Right, Oh,
Speaker 1: he would have been this or she would have been
Speaker 1: this only if she or he made that shot, or
Speaker 1: if they would have made he or she would have
Speaker 1: made that pass or took that extra step right. And
Speaker 1: one of the things that's really made me think about
Speaker 1: that is, um, I've had the opportunity football wise two
Speaker 1: in the last week or show, talked to probably about
Speaker 1: three or four, about four or five. Four or five
Speaker 1: players have either text me and called me pertaining to
Speaker 1: their careers. Current guys, four or five guys that have
Speaker 1: called me pertaining to their career. Not gonna go into
Speaker 1: detail of what, but then it got me starting to thinking.
Speaker 1: Every time I got off the phone five times. One
Speaker 1: of them was after a game this Sunday, I got
Speaker 1: off the phone and said, I am glad I don't
Speaker 1: have to deal with that anymore. Actually, I said, because
Speaker 1: we can say that, I'm glad I had to deal
Speaker 1: with that ship wow and the one that turned my
Speaker 1: stomach though, And I could have cried Nick Boyle this
Speaker 1: past Sunday. Um he toward his knee and I saw
Speaker 1: and it was ugly. I turned the TV off and
Speaker 1: I went to bed. It didn't pat you that much.
Speaker 1: It impacted me that much. One you one, somehow, some
Speaker 1: way you you bring it back to you, but not
Speaker 1: you as in like selfish you. But just like I
Speaker 1: know that feeling, I know that pit in his heart
Speaker 1: and his stomach. He's going through all of those questions,
Speaker 1: how bad is it having a major injury, Like is
Speaker 1: it as bad as they is, it as bad as
Speaker 1: it feels, because right now it hurts, but now you
Speaker 1: think also ahead, right, yes, and so I so I
Speaker 1: woke up on Monday and I kind of was like, oh,
Speaker 1: and he was on my mind again. And and I
Speaker 1: remember when I told my Achilles. I remember when I
Speaker 1: told my Achilles. And when I broke my my ankle,
Speaker 1: and I broke my ankle, I tore the ligaments and
Speaker 1: the inside and outside of my ankle and fractured it. Yes,
Speaker 1: you had combo and every and both times when I
Speaker 1: got injured, I woke up the next day and was like, damn,
Speaker 1: that was a horrible dream. But it was reality. And
Speaker 1: you know how it was reality is I had my
Speaker 1: foot look back down. No, no, I had my foot up,
Speaker 1: and I got up. And when you get up, when
Speaker 1: you break a break a lower extremity, you elevate it.
Speaker 1: Why because so you get all of you allowed of
Speaker 1: the blood to not the bad blood that's in that
Speaker 1: break not to sit there. So its circulating because it's
Speaker 1: the furthest thing from your heart. So that's why they
Speaker 1: have elevated. It requires your body has to work so
Speaker 1: much harder to get the blood in and out of there.
Speaker 1: But when you elevate a foot for seven eight hours
Speaker 1: in sleeping, guess what happens, What must go up, what
Speaker 1: it comes out? So when you when I got up
Speaker 1: to use the bathroom, bro it burned all of that
Speaker 1: blood rushing there because it was its injured, stung to
Speaker 1: the point of where when I was going, I was like,
Speaker 1: it hurts because you hip hop hop and you're still
Speaker 1: kind of half sleep. Then I go to pee and
Speaker 1: that blood rushing out and pissed all on the wall,
Speaker 1: missed the toilet smith and the drink. The bad dream
Speaker 1: now becomes a living nightmare. I mean you you walk
Speaker 1: through the physical pain of an injury. But as a
Speaker 1: guy who I had a high ankle sprand I had
Speaker 1: I had a bone spur, I never had an impactful
Speaker 1: injury like breaking my ankles, tearing my achilles. Physical wise,
Speaker 1: got that part. Mental wise, where are you? You just
Speaker 1: talked about right after it happens, But I'd love to
Speaker 1: hear from you. What's the morning when you wake up?
Speaker 1: Where is your where is your mental state of mind?
Speaker 1: I'm sitting on the edge of the bed and I'm
Speaker 1: asking myself, will I get through this? Because of my
Speaker 1: my will to get through it no longer counts. And
Speaker 1: this is for clarity. Was this both times? Did you
Speaker 1: have that conversation with yourself both times? Okay, I'm an overthinker,
Speaker 1: over process, so I have a lot of conversations with myself.
Speaker 1: I'm also asking because you broke that when you broke
Speaker 1: the ankle, you're my fifth, fifth, or sixth years. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And then then then when you told your acatelles you're
Speaker 1: you were you're removed from retiring anyway. You can retire
Speaker 1: that year. Yeah. Yeah, So I just didn't know if
Speaker 1: there's a difference. And oh, I really just felt you
Speaker 1: just sitting at the end of the bed and you're
Speaker 1: figuring out how I just gonna work out for me
Speaker 1: because you don't have any control over And that's one
Speaker 1: thing about athletes. You know you can You know that
Speaker 1: David and Goliath, you know he gets his stones, he
Speaker 1: is he takes a slingshot and he's ain't no sling
Speaker 1: shot in this one player. You are David and you
Speaker 1: are Goliath, except goliathe is broken. And there's a question
Speaker 1: of your your higher power. There's a disconnection of your
Speaker 1: higher power. You are searching. There is no scripture to
Speaker 1: help you through this. There's a scripture you can read,
Speaker 1: but it doesn't stop the playing. Let's be realistic, right,
Speaker 1: you know. And and so it was really difficult in
Speaker 1: both times. And so in my mind I was going through,
Speaker 1: what is he feeling right now? What is Nick Boyle?
Speaker 1: What is Odell Beckham Jr? What is Dak Prescott? What
Speaker 1: is Ronnie Stanley? What is uh Nick Bossa? What is
Speaker 1: Jimmy Garoppolo? I mean, that's guy after guy after guy
Speaker 1: after god that's been injured and they're all thinking the
Speaker 1: same thing. They're all thinking the same thing, which is,
Speaker 1: you know, the the social media and the Instagram post
Speaker 1: is loo get through it? Oh God has our back.
Speaker 1: But the reality is you're reliant on is this surgeon
Speaker 1: gonna find something? And why do I say that? Is
Speaker 1: I told my achilles when I tear it normal achilles,
Speaker 1: Dr Bob Anderson does it? Yeah, Dr Anderson did it.
Speaker 1: They opened up my achilles where I toured near where
Speaker 1: your calf and your ankle is your the bottom of
Speaker 1: your heel um ankle and then in between your calf,
Speaker 1: So I toured he opens me up. My top is
Speaker 1: at the bottom of my bottom is at the tops
Speaker 1: like that. Oh no, And he said it was fresh
Speaker 1: car tissue. I tore my achilles slightly toward back in
Speaker 1: May that year, so I was playing May June, I
Speaker 1: was playing O T a S training camp and the
Speaker 1: rest of it and throughout the season until I toured
Speaker 1: already on strings threads of achilles. So when I tore
Speaker 1: my achilles when officially completely tour, it was a double rupture.
Speaker 1: Sort tore in the middle where it tears. It also
Speaker 1: tore off the bone. So they had to take my achilles,
Speaker 1: drill it with a screw, and I think it was
Speaker 1: I'm hoping it well, I'm thankful it was fully charged
Speaker 1: up to drill that they used, right, and they drilled
Speaker 1: it with a screw my achilles. They attached it back
Speaker 1: to the heel and then sold it back up to
Speaker 1: the other achilles because it had basically exploded. And so
Speaker 1: my I I was a double rupture to achilles. That
Speaker 1: that was the first double rupture he's ever seen, especially
Speaker 1: on the older guy. I was saying, think about how
Speaker 1: damaging that could be. And we've seen other athletes. Remember
Speaker 1: Kobe tore his achilles. I ain't, but I'm just trying
Speaker 1: to run through. I'm just making sure you can pay
Speaker 1: yourself to Kobe said that, not you. I ain't Kobe,
Speaker 1: but but I'm just saying in terms of athletes who
Speaker 1: are older and that injury happens and stuff. So when
Speaker 1: you saw look at Cousins, look at book at Cousins. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so when you saw Nick's injury, all this came back, well,
Speaker 1: not all of that came back up. I'm just giving
Speaker 1: reference and clarity and in context too. You go under
Speaker 1: the knife, you don't know, and that doc doesn't know completely.
Speaker 1: The m R I would say, yes, it's torn, But
Speaker 1: the m R I doesn't say yeah, it's torn because
Speaker 1: they scanned my leg, but they didn't scan they scanned
Speaker 1: my achilles area. They didn't scan my whole lower extremity
Speaker 1: to know how significant the impact of that injury, how
Speaker 1: what was the full severity and what other areas did
Speaker 1: it effect because you don't think, oh, he's thirty, he's
Speaker 1: thirty seven, thirty eight. Of course he double ruption that.
Speaker 1: Let's let's get that, let's get over there. Body's heel
Speaker 1: as well, because you know it goes down there now, right,
Speaker 1: So that's what happened. So with Nick, and I saw
Speaker 1: it how bad it was. He's also he's a great guy, right,
Speaker 1: he knows ball, but Ball is also all he knows, husband, son,
Speaker 1: and a child on the way. What do you think
Speaker 1: he's thinking all negative? And I'm not saying he's a
Speaker 1: negative person, but he's thinking like every other father, every
Speaker 1: other You mentioned your responsibilities with which you don't have
Speaker 1: right now, Yes, you don't have ball. Believe he's in
Speaker 1: his contract year. Think about it. He's sitting there going
Speaker 1: what am I gonna do? His wife is being supportive.
Speaker 1: You ever saw did you see this? Uh? He's sixty
Speaker 1: or the sixty on Alex Smith? Think about that His
Speaker 1: wife had made it had to make a decision. Do
Speaker 1: I amputate my husband's leg? But here's the problem. If
Speaker 1: she amputates his leg and he comes out, she this
Speaker 1: is my This is Steve Smith. I haven't spoken to
Speaker 1: Alex alumni, but I have not spoken to him. But
Speaker 1: this is what I do know. Don't say me short
Speaker 1: m hm. The doctors are telling me, they're telling you,
Speaker 1: the nurses telling you, we gotta take his leg off.
Speaker 1: But she knows her man. She better know her man,
Speaker 1: and she knows that what guy put in him is
Speaker 1: greater than what these doctors have studied. These doctors have
Speaker 1: studied books, but those books can't measure man's heart. Those
Speaker 1: books cannot measure what is in a woman, what's in
Speaker 1: a man that allows them to play this sport that
Speaker 1: very very many will try, but very few will accomplish.
Speaker 1: And so I just it just made me think about that,
Speaker 1: and I start seeing all these guys get injured, and
Speaker 1: then the question marks that I know I've had. So
Speaker 1: I'm giving y'all a peek into the conversations, the inner
Speaker 1: dialogue that these men have in their lonely places when
Speaker 1: they when the you know, COVID is going on right now.
Speaker 1: So you you don't have people in the fan, in
Speaker 1: the stands, but what you do have is you still lonely.
Speaker 1: You still have to now you're still in your bedroom
Speaker 1: asking God, what did I do? Room? Well? Did I
Speaker 1: do something in training that could have prevented this? We
Speaker 1: have to take a break, and do you want anything?
Speaker 1: We gotta pay some bills. I love cut to it,
Speaker 1: and I love it even more when you download us
Speaker 1: and subscribe, and you can follow us on social media too. Smithie,
Speaker 1: where where at that's at? Cut to It on Instagram,
Speaker 1: what about Twitter? At cut to It Facebook, cut to
Speaker 1: It featuring Steve Smith singr what about online? And you
Speaker 1: can follow us at cut to It podcast dot com
Speaker 1: where you can buy merch and you can subscribe to
Speaker 1: us wherever you listen to podcasts. I got all my
Speaker 1: answers questions. Uh yeah, I got all my questions answered.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm here for, a brother, cut to a
Speaker 1: podcast dot Com. Another thing that I dealt with that
Speaker 1: you gotta have to you have to be extremely careful
Speaker 1: is um. So when I tore my achilles, I had
Speaker 1: to go back. I was in Baltimore, had to go
Speaker 1: back and pack up my stuff. So I did not
Speaker 1: get back to Charlotte for a week. But they gave
Speaker 1: me pain pills. Yeah, for a week. Then I had
Speaker 1: my surgery week and a half later, almost two weeks.
Speaker 1: But I was still taking my pain pills because I
Speaker 1: had a double rupture. I was on vikingting for almost
Speaker 1: three weeks and I and so I was like, man,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna stop taking because I'm not a medicine guy.
Speaker 1: So I stopped taking a medicine. You don't want to
Speaker 1: build that dependency on it. I stopped taking a medicine,
Speaker 1: and about two or three a's in Bro, about twelve o'clock,
Speaker 1: I would feel my body. I was starting to getting
Speaker 1: angry and or as as a wife, he would say, yes,
Speaker 1: I was. I was having withdrawals to the point of
Speaker 1: where I would rather go through the pain in my
Speaker 1: leg then go through the physical pain of my body.
Speaker 1: Of the dependency, of dependence, the dependency, and also I
Speaker 1: can feel my mind shifting. Hey, bro, we we heard
Speaker 1: a mental thing. Yes, and so I literally wobble my
Speaker 1: ass with my knee scooler into my room, opened up
Speaker 1: by my bed next to my clock, took the pills
Speaker 1: and I poured them down the toilet. Now I know
Speaker 1: I wasn't supposed to do that. I poured them down
Speaker 1: the toilet and throw them away. I was probably another
Speaker 1: week until I started to and started to feel normal.
Speaker 1: I was upset. I was starting to get honor, and
Speaker 1: I remember vividly get him at Angie. She made not
Speaker 1: my my at the time disabled self lunch and I
Speaker 1: snatched the play from it. I can do it myself.
Speaker 1: So how It's what what boggles me is how quickly
Speaker 1: your body developed that dependency off off of that injury.
Speaker 1: I wasn't taking to see you saying quick it was
Speaker 1: two weeks almost three, It was what every twelve hours,
Speaker 1: every six hours, But that that's that's a relatively quick
Speaker 1: time frame from the time that you've got injured to
Speaker 1: the time that but I was taking a two to three.
Speaker 1: And you gotta remember, I'm my Tyler's when my body
Speaker 1: says I have a dependency. I had a tylerance of pain.
Speaker 1: So I had strong ones, right, Because there are times
Speaker 1: in the past I would have injuries, I wouldn't take
Speaker 1: any payments, I did not take anything. But this was so,
Speaker 1: it was so it was so much pain, and I
Speaker 1: would take So here's how I started. They gave him
Speaker 1: to me to take at night to just allow me
Speaker 1: to sleep, and then I start taking them during the
Speaker 1: day and I was taking them at night. How often
Speaker 1: do you think that that happens? And I'm not even
Speaker 1: just saying within the athlete community, but it happens all
Speaker 1: the time. That this this is more and it's less.
Speaker 1: You know, people are gonna take that and say, oh,
Speaker 1: Steve was hooked on drugs or you know, it's more. Yeah,
Speaker 1: But what I'm also talking about is, you know, people
Speaker 1: asking me what I meant, Bro, I don't miss the
Speaker 1: let down of losing. I don't miss the high of winning.
Speaker 1: And I don't miss the bs that all these teams
Speaker 1: that have lost. Think about the New York Jets, what
Speaker 1: they're dealing with coach Adam Gateson every week people are
Speaker 1: asking them about coaching decisions, play calling decisions. And you
Speaker 1: have to give the political correct an a politically correct well.
Speaker 1: We we just we we have all our trust in
Speaker 1: the coach that he'll make the right decision, y'all. Oh,
Speaker 1: and I we've already established this dude is not making
Speaker 1: the right decision. He's already known that we didn't make
Speaker 1: the right decision about this this this right guard who's
Speaker 1: who's constantly getting beat. We have made the right decision
Speaker 1: about this corner who's constantly getting burned. We have, We haven't.
Speaker 1: We didn't make the right decision when we drafted this
Speaker 1: wide receiver who can't win against press, or when he does,
Speaker 1: he doesn't catch the ball, or when he does catch
Speaker 1: the ball and wins off press, he fumbles it. Now,
Speaker 1: you I do want to You said something that was
Speaker 1: very interesting. You said, I don't miss the highs of winning.
Speaker 1: Someone's gonna hear that part and definitely be like, what
Speaker 1: does he mean? Like we all we all like winning, right,
Speaker 1: whether you play sports or not. Like you like winning
Speaker 1: the board room, You're like winning. You're like winning at you'r.
Speaker 1: You want to see your kids win at the recital,
Speaker 1: like whatever it is, talk to me about that, Like
Speaker 1: you don't miss the eyes of winning. Most most fool
Speaker 1: love to win. I enjoy winning. But what what what
Speaker 1: is tough is the expectation of next week to do
Speaker 1: the exact same thing, or more so the pressure the
Speaker 1: pressure pressure pressure pipes, yes, or makes diamonds. But what
Speaker 1: happens when you're diamond one week and the fan makes
Speaker 1: you cold door dib the next week or doorstop and
Speaker 1: that that's part of that? Is that? Is that a
Speaker 1: heavy Is that a heavyweight? Um? Don't give him pc answer. No,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm looking. So there are times if you watch
Speaker 1: me or listen to me talk or watch me on TV,
Speaker 1: I have What's crazy is every single one of my
Speaker 1: boys because we are you know, I'm not saying we
Speaker 1: are stupid, but because we're smart, our minds worked faster.
Speaker 1: Peyton when he was a little kissed stuttered like that
Speaker 1: his mind was working fashion his lips. I found how
Speaker 1: my mom told me a couple of years ago, and
Speaker 1: I would said, damn, I wish you had told me sooner.
Speaker 1: I started when I was a kid, just like Peyton
Speaker 1: Boston stuttered when he was a little kid. I struggle.
Speaker 1: There are some words my lips and tongue just cannot pronounce.
Speaker 1: Like I say, I have to emphasize wash and you
Speaker 1: can still hear. They're just some words that I struggle with.
Speaker 1: And so performance anxiety and what I mean by really
Speaker 1: steve performance anxiety. When I used to train, I would
Speaker 1: have a heart rate monitor, and my I trained scientifically,
Speaker 1: So I had a heart rate monitor because that allows
Speaker 1: me to know how my body is reacting. What zones
Speaker 1: I do? Peloton trained, uh um, treadmill and on there.
Speaker 1: They have four zones. I have five zones. My five
Speaker 1: zones is my peak, my peak heart rate, peak beats permitted.
Speaker 1: Zone five is between one no, I'm sorry, that's zone
Speaker 1: four one day, two oh three. Zone four is one
Speaker 1: oh one fifty nine to one eighty three and then
Speaker 1: one eighty two to whatever. When I trained, well, my trainer,
Speaker 1: we're training, we're training then we have to do my
Speaker 1: test conditioning tests, and we would do it once a
Speaker 1: week to see where I was at. It was five
Speaker 1: four gassers under thirty one seconds. Well, he go, all right,
Speaker 1: let's do the test. Now. I would train and he
Speaker 1: would make sure I wouldn't peak too early. So if
Speaker 1: I was doing to work out or a drill, and
Speaker 1: it was if I got above one seventy at this
Speaker 1: point of the work at this point at the time
Speaker 1: of the workout, I would have to take more time
Speaker 1: to rest. So he would say, all right, let's get
Speaker 1: on the let's get on the let's get online. We
Speaker 1: about do the test, bro. And when we could do
Speaker 1: the test either Monday, but we have to do it
Speaker 1: once a week, and that could be at the middle
Speaker 1: of the week, the beginning of the week, or the
Speaker 1: end of the week. When he say when he would
Speaker 1: say get on there, get online, let's do the test.
Speaker 1: Say I'd be in the one thirties and one forties
Speaker 1: brom he said, get online, do the test. My heart
Speaker 1: rate would jump to the anxiety because that was something
Speaker 1: as what measurable. It had a clear cut result and
Speaker 1: I knew or not if I want or if I
Speaker 1: failed Wow. I don't miss that high of having that
Speaker 1: because in TV, whether you do good or bad. You know,
Speaker 1: obviously social media people gonna tell you suck? Are you Gray?
Speaker 1: I love you, I hate you. But it's a lot less.
Speaker 1: There's a lot less on this. It's not the like
Speaker 1: you mentioned, there's not the performance because I just I
Speaker 1: look at stats, I look at games, and I say, oh,
Speaker 1: this team is good like the Seattle Seahawks. They're good
Speaker 1: because they have Russell Wilson. They're bad because they don't
Speaker 1: have the legion. They's not a clear win loss, no,
Speaker 1: but they're on page right now to give up average
Speaker 1: per game four hundred fifty six yards a game, right,
Speaker 1: that's the most in NFL. Oh yeah, screen door right,
Speaker 1: screen door with multiple holes. Right, that's a win shield
Speaker 1: with no Betty defense. And you driving a car with
Speaker 1: just the frame of the wind shield, no wind shield
Speaker 1: on there? Why is all these bugs getting what you're
Speaker 1: saying though, Like just the weight of of of before
Speaker 1: me and I would say most people who are listening
Speaker 1: to our podcasts, most people who are fans of Steve
Speaker 1: Smith for or watch your career, they're probably gonna be
Speaker 1: a little bit surprised that maybe you you deal with
Speaker 1: that because who you see on the field, it's probably
Speaker 1: not who you're saying you had the internal dialogue. My
Speaker 1: internal dialogue looks different than what you saw. I had
Speaker 1: to shut it off. It was so bad. I mean,
Speaker 1: I did give our listeners some examples then, sir, uh
Speaker 1: internal dialogue. Um. I had a professional sports psychologist who
Speaker 1: was beneficial. I had him for like sevens five seven years.
Speaker 1: You know he was beneficial because he taught me my
Speaker 1: daily goals, weekly goals, lifetime goals, yearly goals, a short term,
Speaker 1: long term um achievable. Taught me when I look at
Speaker 1: film by myself, just look at us data, no feelings,
Speaker 1: What can I improve? What can I you know, what
Speaker 1: can I grab from it? Right down? This? All that stuff.
Speaker 1: He taught me that. But then he also taught me
Speaker 1: how to not do the Sergio Garcia. Sergio Garcia and
Speaker 1: what do I mean by that? Any golfers knew Sergio
Speaker 1: Garcia you see today as the older one, he's superb.
Speaker 1: Sergio Garcia younger was a mental midget. He would be
Speaker 1: leading tournaments and screw up because he cannot keep his focus.
Speaker 1: So for me, I learned how to keep my focus,
Speaker 1: but also quail quiet the internal dialogue where when I
Speaker 1: got in the huddle and whoever was the quarterback say
Speaker 1: to play, I can play that play before we leave
Speaker 1: the huddle and see and visualize myself catching that pass
Speaker 1: before by the time he says to play, we say break,
Speaker 1: I've already saw myself catching that past, spinning the ball
Speaker 1: and dragging back to the huddle that I'm in, receiving
Speaker 1: a play within that twenty seconds and lining up and
Speaker 1: doing that. That's what the That's what the sports psychology
Speaker 1: taught me how to do visitization on steroids, and I
Speaker 1: get that point, But I'm also asking what what were
Speaker 1: you saying to yourself's what's what's the what's the let's
Speaker 1: be honest, what's the negative self talk? You dropped that
Speaker 1: because you always fuck up. You dropped that because you
Speaker 1: wasn't supposed to be here anyway. See, they're gonna know
Speaker 1: your frauds, They're gonna know this short receiver from l A.
Speaker 1: You're really not supposed to be here because you mentioned anxiety,
Speaker 1: and anxiety sounds like, man, it's the pressure of this
Speaker 1: place is coming to me and I've got to perform
Speaker 1: the team is depending on me to make this play?
Speaker 1: How does how does? How does that feel? If you
Speaker 1: go back in history, I call it pass against Uh.
Speaker 1: We were playing the green Bay package and I called
Speaker 1: it pass against the Hall of Famer Charles Woodson. But
Speaker 1: in that play before that, we're in a huddle and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna close my eyes and I'm gonna tell you
Speaker 1: all the players that I see right now. We're in
Speaker 1: Green Bay is chili now? Prior to that, that should
Speaker 1: play the Jonathan Steward ran the ball down and he
Speaker 1: didn't warm up before that game, so he wasn't He
Speaker 1: wasn't fully warm, and they almost called him and I
Speaker 1: was like, bro, why did he want? He's like, I
Speaker 1: locked up? It was too cold out of warm up.
Speaker 1: I said, boy, you're in a football game. It ain't
Speaker 1: a pageant in Green Bay. You were cold, all right?
Speaker 1: So I remember that past. So I'm going and we're
Speaker 1: going to huddle and they call it hey uh. And
Speaker 1: I felt bad at the time too because it was me.
Speaker 1: I think Rick was still on the team, but I
Speaker 1: can't remember uh he was because Jake was on the
Speaker 1: team and it was Moose and I remember he goes, uh,
Speaker 1: Smithy hey make this play. But before that, I had
Speaker 1: my guy number sixty nine, Jordan Gross, who was always
Speaker 1: in the hudd thirteen years, never missed. We never missed
Speaker 1: games without each other. He played in college and the
Speaker 1: NFL guy that I I just loved when I played
Speaker 1: extra z all. I played ext in college and I
Speaker 1: played extent in the NFL when I was in Carolina
Speaker 1: and always looked to the left. J G. Number six,
Speaker 1: A's mcguy and like he always say, Smitty, we need
Speaker 1: to play Treville Ward number seventy eight, dancing bear as
Speaker 1: UH coach Dan he used to call him. Um used
Speaker 1: to play tackle at South South Carolina, but they moved
Speaker 1: them to tackle because he was strong enough to play tackle,
Speaker 1: but his feet wasn't quick enough. But they were too
Speaker 1: quick to be guard. So that's why he was an
Speaker 1: excellent guard when they finally switched him over. Ryan Khalil,
Speaker 1: USC brother Matt Khalil played at UH first round pick
Speaker 1: played at the Minnesota Vikings. But Khalil was a great dude.
Speaker 1: He was undersized, but he was athletic and smart. He
Speaker 1: could always get us out of a pinch at the defense. UH,
Speaker 1: even something that we didn't know. Um and Then there
Speaker 1: was the tackle that we got from Pitt. I can't
Speaker 1: remember his name he if he would applied itself as
Speaker 1: is better, but yes, Jeff Holton. Then we had Kendrick,
Speaker 1: who was we got him from New Orleans. Uh clown,
Speaker 1: great dude, right, had all of that. Then we got
Speaker 1: my boy, big Broad Muhammad. I just called u day.
Speaker 1: He called me Koday when I went in no no
Speaker 1: shave November. Then I had Schlick Rick taught me a
Speaker 1: lot um. Then we had Chris Mangom or whatever tidy
Speaker 1: end that was, or Dante Rosario whoever that Jeff King
Speaker 1: played at Virginia Tech who now is a scout for
Speaker 1: the Chicago Bears. Then we had D'Angelo and and and
Speaker 1: then we had a short round with Mike Toober. No
Speaker 1: that was Revere but Brad Hoover right, And then there
Speaker 1: was me and when I was sitting in that huddle,
Speaker 1: and I go through all that because I remember their names,
Speaker 1: their faces. And we had Christmas parties that I threw
Speaker 1: every the guys through through Halloween parties, and our our
Speaker 1: wives would all talk and our kids would invite each
Speaker 1: other kids to the birthday party, and I did not,
Speaker 1: and I could not let those guys and those families down,
Speaker 1: because if we didn't win that game, and we lost
Speaker 1: enough games, then these guys will get fired. The coaches
Speaker 1: will get fired. And the coaches got fired, then the
Speaker 1: new culture come in. New culture come in. He wants
Speaker 1: his players, which means what he wants his players. So
Speaker 1: these players now have to relocate there two other cities,
Speaker 1: other places, and then our kids will lose friends, and
Speaker 1: then they wouldn't get invite to the birthday parties because
Speaker 1: they're in different places. All that is going through my head.
Speaker 1: And so when I'm saying, Jordan's gross who I've been
Speaker 1: playing with two years in college and then all these
Speaker 1: ten years, so fifteen years, I've never not been in
Speaker 1: the huddle, what I might do? Number sixty nine, Jordan
Speaker 1: grows Jake delone, and then you always got John Cases
Speaker 1: set himself for the win, and then you got to
Speaker 1: pun of Jason Baker. I did not want to let
Speaker 1: these guys down. So jj would say, Smithy, you got me.
Speaker 1: I need to play, and Khalil would say you got this.
Speaker 1: And Travill didn't speak a lot, but when Trail spoke
Speaker 1: to me, it meant something. He say, we need you.
Speaker 1: And if Travill, who didn't speak a lot, told me
Speaker 1: he needed me, you know it's important and I didn't
Speaker 1: want to failow. But if I pause and I say, well,
Speaker 1: we ain't supposed to be here because we'll sunk up anyway.
Speaker 1: So it's just a matter of time when everybody knows
Speaker 1: that you're from. So we're going to huddle. And he said,
Speaker 1: this is your play huntry circle, hitch under streak. I'm
Speaker 1: in the slot. Moose goes to streak, but he's only
Speaker 1: looking for one dude now when I'm playing, and that
Speaker 1: doubt I ain't age and eating. Oh I'm Steven. Y'all
Speaker 1: know him ass, Steve god Rest sold my grandmother, Betty
Speaker 1: Smith's you called me Steven. My mama called me Steve
Speaker 1: on there's a selective few that called me by my birthnight.
Speaker 1: The rest of y'all gotta call me Steve Steve. And
Speaker 1: so I was, and I'm sitting in there and I
Speaker 1: don't want to let those guys down, and I can't
Speaker 1: let them down. And so I used to wear a
Speaker 1: rubber band or you would see me back in the day.
Speaker 1: If I called to drop the pass, I would clap,
Speaker 1: and that was a psychological reset where the players over
Speaker 1: move on, let's get the works. Yes. And then if
Speaker 1: I had a negative thought, I had a rubber band.
Speaker 1: I would snap it to get myself out at that
Speaker 1: negative thought. And then I wrote on there with a
Speaker 1: pen zero in parentheses mean zero negative thoughts. While we're
Speaker 1: making this money, why are we going to work? And
Speaker 1: that's what go through my mind. I had to have
Speaker 1: all these things put in place because unfortunately, a lot
Speaker 1: of times when you saw that face that I was making,
Speaker 1: I was fighting back the tears and the uncomfortableness and
Speaker 1: the fear of failing. Because if I failed, and that
Speaker 1: means I had to go back to A hundred six Avalon,
Speaker 1: I had to go back to seventy nine A McKinley Avenue.
Speaker 1: I had to go back to and Vaness had to
Speaker 1: go back to Anderson may So of the school the
Speaker 1: elementary school almost got kicked out of. I had to
Speaker 1: go back to part of Vida school I got kicked
Speaker 1: out of, which made me go to Emerson, which I
Speaker 1: couldn't go to Palisades because I had to go to university.
Speaker 1: And then I had to get back on the bus,
Speaker 1: the number seven bus, UH the Pico to go to
Speaker 1: Senate Marican College, and I had to get back on
Speaker 1: that bus to go to back to Tacobear White us
Speaker 1: to work to make money just to pay for myself.
Speaker 1: That allowed me to pay for me to go to PRAM,
Speaker 1: all of that. But but the viewer only sees you
Speaker 1: making the play against Charles Woodson. Yes, you're making the
Speaker 1: play against Fritz mud Keep to leave. We see that,
Speaker 1: but we never And thank you man for were opening
Speaker 1: up yourself, your mind and walking people through that's what's
Speaker 1: going on inside of me. You just see this confident,
Speaker 1: uh ever, young, arrogant, dominant football player, but on the inside,
Speaker 1: like you said, you are scared as a button, right,
Speaker 1: And a lot of that is some of that the
Speaker 1: wounds of growing up in the inner city, the rooms
Speaker 1: of the wounds of being uh poor, disadvantaged. Uh And
Speaker 1: this isn't talking about my family, just just just where
Speaker 1: we are. And so I struggle. And at one point,
Speaker 1: probably the last three or four years of my career
Speaker 1: training off season, bro, I just started praying through my goscious,
Speaker 1: help me get through this workout. I'm so tired physically.
Speaker 1: Do you think you mean? Uh? Yeah, yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: how much as I thought all the time right now
Speaker 1: with everything going on, I'm I'm such a thinker. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about Christmas gifts right now because of COVID,
Speaker 1: and every time you order something online it tells you
Speaker 1: preparing for the delay. I'm always I'm a thinker, but
Speaker 1: I'm also a professional sleeper. So I have two buttons on,
Speaker 1: off and off. I'm on, I'm gonna go and go on.
Speaker 1: But when I'm off, right, you're talking about, dude. I
Speaker 1: was on the airplane for fourteen hours and I slept
Speaker 1: ten and a half of it. And I ain't talking
Speaker 1: about straight. Neither I slept straight. I'm hey, sir, would
Speaker 1: you after this meal? Can I get a drinking and
Speaker 1: snack early because I'm not gonna be up for the
Speaker 1: rest of it. I'm not talking about like you know,
Speaker 1: I said straight, But I was on the flight fourteen
Speaker 1: hours and I didn't sleep periodically or I slept it straight.
Speaker 1: I think it's about that time. Just take a little breather.
Speaker 1: Good do it, Good do it. Let's get down to
Speaker 1: do it. Hey, Gerard, why did you get that T shirt? Oh? Yes,
Speaker 1: I got it from cut to a podcast dot com,
Speaker 1: where we have exclusive merchandise. Shout out to our guys
Speaker 1: at seven or four shot. But yeah, you can go on,
Speaker 1: buy you a T shirt, subscribe to us wherever you
Speaker 1: listen to podcasts to bring it back. When these four
Speaker 1: or five guys come to you, you're essentially they're safe place.
Speaker 1: How does that make you feel? Uh? I just look
Speaker 1: at this man speak encouragement. Don't bullshit them? Yeah, don't
Speaker 1: he one guy? One guy text he's I said, listen,
Speaker 1: I said, and uh, hey, bro, how are you doing?
Speaker 1: I said, how you doing? Bro? Comma? How's your mentors?
Speaker 1: His reply was wild, I didn't expect that from you,
Speaker 1: but much appreciated doing pretty good until I talked to
Speaker 1: the doctor and he told me the severity of the injury,
Speaker 1: and it broke me down. I said, damn, I'm sorry
Speaker 1: about that. I said, but if anybody can get through this,
Speaker 1: very few are made to do this, but but few
Speaker 1: are chosen to be able to get through it successfully,
Speaker 1: and you're one of those guys. His reply was, thank you.
Speaker 1: I needed that. Nobody says asking that I'm sure or or,
Speaker 1: and then on the back end built them up because
Speaker 1: let me tell you some of these injuries than hey,
Speaker 1: everybody's not built for him. Because I'm gonna tell you,
Speaker 1: if someone said, hey, you get to have a double rupture,
Speaker 1: will you be okay? Will you? Hell? No, nope, not me, Steve.
Speaker 1: That's not my name, Stevens. My daddy Steve is right here. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So that that's that's something that's just been wrestling with it.
Speaker 1: I've been wrestling with it, and I've been getting up
Speaker 1: in the morning running, and it's just been reminded me.
Speaker 1: Um the process and being uncomfortable and in the midst
Speaker 1: of that uncomfortable nous. You may not see the results immediately,
Speaker 1: but if you, if you, if you hang in there
Speaker 1: and you wait around long enough, you will see doing
Speaker 1: pretty good. But but we're comfortable being uncomfortable. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: I'm talking about even long, even deeper than that. Sometimes
Speaker 1: we want to be uncomfortable for that ten minutes and
Speaker 1: expect the results immediately. No, sometimes you won't see the
Speaker 1: results for six months. That's the other part. You know
Speaker 1: what I don't miss. I don't miss getting injured and
Speaker 1: rehabbing and physit and doing all the physical stuff for
Speaker 1: the next twelve months. Think about that. You get hurt
Speaker 1: in November, but you really won't know if you're even
Speaker 1: close to the next November, No, the next November to
Speaker 1: start to run to see where you at. So it
Speaker 1: takes really, it takes you about a significant injury can
Speaker 1: take you between fourteen to sixteen months to be back
Speaker 1: to normal. But what derails people is can they push
Speaker 1: themselves in that twelve to six that those four months
Speaker 1: in between the twelve and sixteen to get back to
Speaker 1: that normal because once you're healed, now you can start
Speaker 1: to work it. So it's like the mental process and
Speaker 1: and and the mental uh waiting games, the mental like
Speaker 1: you go, oh right, So I so when I told
Speaker 1: my achillings, I remember it was eight months of not
Speaker 1: it was eight and a half weeks of non weight bearing.
Speaker 1: So I got eight weeks. I can't walk on it
Speaker 1: for eight weeks in fear of and I know some
Speaker 1: people that did it that they were sleep walking and
Speaker 1: stepped down and retort. Had to start the process all
Speaker 1: over again, talking about scared as as as you should
Speaker 1: be right, So you think about eight and a half
Speaker 1: weeks of non weight bearing and then that's when they
Speaker 1: take the cast off and then you start the other
Speaker 1: remaining talk show like okay, what's after the eight weeks?
Speaker 1: They say, oh, you got another eight weeks of just
Speaker 1: trying to get the stiffness out because you haven't moved
Speaker 1: that ligament, the atrophy and the scarred to you break
Speaker 1: it down by massage. Think about it. Some people say, oh,
Speaker 1: you get a massage on your foot for eight weeks.
Speaker 1: This ain't massage. The massage heights, This ain't the this
Speaker 1: ain't the spy day every day it is. They use
Speaker 1: a tool to physically break down the scar tissue and
Speaker 1: it and when they break down scar tissue, it burns.
Speaker 1: It's like the And then how they do it. They
Speaker 1: gotta take so when they cut you open, they gotta
Speaker 1: do which is the part that sucks. The eight weeks
Speaker 1: that is healing, eight weeks of those stitches and that
Speaker 1: new the new blood and healing. And now they gotta
Speaker 1: cut the ends of those stitches that they used to
Speaker 1: stitch you up. Now they got to pull them out.
Speaker 1: So now they gotta rip open the skin and pull
Speaker 1: out that little old string and then that burns. And
Speaker 1: then now they use the tool for the next eight
Speaker 1: weeks to break down the scar tissue. And they're forcefully
Speaker 1: making you use that leg that hasn't been used in
Speaker 1: eight weeks, that has been forced to be in a
Speaker 1: certain position. You want to see a dude cry. Watch
Speaker 1: somebody do rehab when they have torn their A c L.
Speaker 1: And now they have to break down the scar tissue
Speaker 1: for you to bend your knee. I've seen grown men
Speaker 1: cry and scream and agony because they've had their knees
Speaker 1: straight in that brace. You gotta bend it, and how
Speaker 1: guess how they bend it? They You've been to every
Speaker 1: couple of weeks, more and more pushing yourself. No they're not. No,
Speaker 1: you ain't pushing yourself. You wan'ta hear the screwed up part.
Speaker 1: The trainers pushing you, the trainers pushing your knee beyond
Speaker 1: where your scar tissue wants you to go. So it
Speaker 1: sounds like it's the physical pain and then the mental endurance.
Speaker 1: And then you go in there and you walk out
Speaker 1: of there and they say, see them all, I gotta
Speaker 1: do this all over again. Self doubt, questioning how this
Speaker 1: is gonna work out, because let's be honest, just because
Speaker 1: you're six your surgery was successful doesn't mean your rehab
Speaker 1: your body's gonna bounce back successful Lindsey Van how many?
Speaker 1: How many injuries? She's an outstanding skier, but the injuries
Speaker 1: were wore her down to where she couldn't be the
Speaker 1: world record holder, the spectacular skier that we all known
Speaker 1: her for. Not because she wasn't good enough, but the
Speaker 1: injuries took some of her skill away to so much
Speaker 1: that she wasn't what she used to be, Not because
Speaker 1: she didn't want to, because her body told her right, well,
Speaker 1: I mean for the same for for for the same
Speaker 1: way you checked in with Nick and you said, how's
Speaker 1: your mental last year? As my brother, how's your worst?
Speaker 1: I'm good, yeah, because I gotta do nothing that ship there.
Speaker 1: I'm serious. But I just thought about it, and what
Speaker 1: it's made me do is be more sympathetic and reach
Speaker 1: out to those guys, to be able to check on
Speaker 1: them and say and let them know. You may think
Speaker 1: people aren't worried about you or concerned because a lot
Speaker 1: of times talking about sports, when god get injured, what
Speaker 1: did they say, next man up? There's no next man
Speaker 1: up and injury when you've been through it, you just
Speaker 1: make sure they know they're still playing a football game.
Speaker 1: But we haven't forgot about you. That's deep man, I
Speaker 1: think you, I think you were able to break down
Speaker 1: a lot of again, the internal dialogue that people face,
Speaker 1: whether it's through injury, whether it's when you're on the
Speaker 1: field and its performance. You gave so much that I
Speaker 1: think will go a long way and painting the picture
Speaker 1: of of an athlete overall, because I just think that
Speaker 1: that's what is sometimes void. And it's been the cool
Speaker 1: part about this this journey, would cut to it is
Speaker 1: that we're finding out from yourself and then from from
Speaker 1: other guests what's going on under the jersey, underneath the
Speaker 1: help in the locker room, when you got towel over
Speaker 1: your head, on the basketball, on the bench, on the
Speaker 1: basketball team. And it's been it's been really cool, man,
Speaker 1: it's been really cool. Just let you know, Uh, when
Speaker 1: we have guests on here, we want people, we want
Speaker 1: you to be able to be to fly on the wall,
Speaker 1: to ear hustle into a conversation, to know that this
Speaker 1: is a safe place. Cut to it is just not
Speaker 1: a place of entertainment that you get a peek into
Speaker 1: side in side of people the athlete, but you get
Speaker 1: an opportunity for that athlete, that person, that woman to
Speaker 1: share who they are, where are they from? How? How
Speaker 1: is there? How did where they grew up shape the
Speaker 1: perspective of how they see the world today? And not
Speaker 1: clothing all the from being honest, the bullshit of you
Speaker 1: got your questions of the controversy, we don't really care.
Speaker 1: I never really know what we want to know about
Speaker 1: the person man or woman because the conversation makes spark
Speaker 1: people to say, Wow, did you know this? No, you
Speaker 1: didn't know. You know why you didn't because you don't
Speaker 1: want to know about me because no one ever asked M.
Speaker 1: We're gonna ask you the questions that no one wants
Speaker 1: to know or they don't really care to ask. All right,
Speaker 1: so we'll do since we're the guestless episode today, we'll
Speaker 1: do uh kind of an altered version of the Deep three.
Speaker 1: We'll do a Deep two and Steve, how do you
Speaker 1: self care? Make sure that you make it to the
Speaker 1: other side of discomfort? HM? Well, one is it has
Speaker 1: been you know, self examining and and also getting people
Speaker 1: and putting myself in places to be able to be
Speaker 1: vulnerable and say I don't know what to do, so
Speaker 1: I go to counseling and kind of go through that
Speaker 1: process because sometimes in that process I'm like, um, am,
Speaker 1: I fucked up here, Like it's it's am I supposed
Speaker 1: to feel like this, and my guys like, how you
Speaker 1: feel is how you feel. Don't hide from how you feel.
Speaker 1: You felt that way for a reason, then let's find
Speaker 1: out why and how and and that's how I've been
Speaker 1: able to connect the dots on you know why. I
Speaker 1: don't miss the game of you know what am I
Speaker 1: feeling and connecting that because I didn't. I didn't know
Speaker 1: and I didn't figure it out. So my self care
Speaker 1: now is being okay with sometimes going I need a
Speaker 1: little time by myself. Get get a run in, UM,
Speaker 1: go hit golf balls. UM. Sometimes I just tell a
Speaker 1: fan I need to hug yeah, you know, Or I'll
Speaker 1: text my I'll text my kids in the groups chat.
Speaker 1: I just want you all to know I love y'all. Cool,
Speaker 1: And just so you're not on a on an island
Speaker 1: and we be vulnerable here, I've got to answer the
Speaker 1: same question and so I do the same thing, right,
Speaker 1: I go to counseling. UH, make sure that I try
Speaker 1: to do it at least once a month of being vulnerable.
Speaker 1: I haven't done in the last couple of months. But
Speaker 1: just to have that check in, to to have that
Speaker 1: space where I can be okay, where I can let
Speaker 1: the guard down, where I can talk about what's going
Speaker 1: on internally that you don't communicate externally to certain people. UM,
Speaker 1: you have to make sure you have that space and
Speaker 1: also have have that space to where it's professional, to
Speaker 1: where it's there are things that you talk about. You know,
Speaker 1: you're my brother, so there are certain things I share
Speaker 1: with you. There are certain things that I share with
Speaker 1: my wife or or other friends. But having that that
Speaker 1: place where you can truly organize your thoughts, you can
Speaker 1: truly learn how to cope, and you can truly learn
Speaker 1: a healthy cope, a healthy cope, and and how you
Speaker 1: can correlate things, whether it be trauma, whether it be UM,
Speaker 1: whether it be verbal abuse, or whatever may have transparent
Speaker 1: in some transpired in someone's life. How do you cope
Speaker 1: with those things being an adult, Because I don't think
Speaker 1: if you haven't gone to counseling, and maybe you do
Speaker 1: know this, but if you haven't going to counselor you
Speaker 1: don't realize some of the things that maybe happen as
Speaker 1: a child, or happened as a team or whatever in
Speaker 1: your formative years. How it shows up when you're an adult,
Speaker 1: and it shows up in how you parent, and it
Speaker 1: shows up in how you or with your spouse or
Speaker 1: how it shows up in many different ways. So for me,
Speaker 1: I have to make sure that I get that time, man,
Speaker 1: because it's just beneficial to me. And if I'm not
Speaker 1: the best version of me that I'm at a disservice
Speaker 1: to anybody else who I work can wherever you're at it,
Speaker 1: you're you are handicapping yourself and the people that if
Speaker 1: you're in a leadership position, you now whoever's under you, You,
Speaker 1: whoever's under now, you are handicapping them. Two for support
Speaker 1: and guidance. YEA, all right, deep to part dose. How
Speaker 1: does overcoming injuries like that help you deal with tough,
Speaker 1: tough situations like the pandemic? That's a goodness, gracious, it's
Speaker 1: the most layered questions. That's a bullshit asked question I got.
Speaker 1: I got fed that one about my producer. It's a
Speaker 1: great question. Um, I think the pandemic. I think what
Speaker 1: what has gone on is allowed me to not panic.
Speaker 1: Uh sometimes just a look at it for what it
Speaker 1: is and say, yeah, we're in the pandemic. Okay, what
Speaker 1: are we gonna do about it? Um? Are we gonna
Speaker 1: go buy up? Uh? You know where I am financially?
Speaker 1: Do I go up and buy up the whole toilet
Speaker 1: paper and uh paper towel al at Costco because I
Speaker 1: can afford it? To make me feel better? Do I
Speaker 1: go ransacked the local grocery store and bible all the
Speaker 1: eggs and milk and bread because I can afford it? No, yes,
Speaker 1: you have some faith in you have faith in God,
Speaker 1: but also you gotta let go of stuff that you
Speaker 1: have no control over unless you know, unless you got
Speaker 1: the virus uh cure. I'm talking. It's definitely it's difficult,
Speaker 1: but you gotta find a way to go to sleep.
Speaker 1: So what I started doing. I stopped At first. I
Speaker 1: I limited myself to watching the news ten minutes. Then
Speaker 1: that wasn't helping. Then I went down to five, and
Speaker 1: then I just said I can't do it. I went
Speaker 1: probably about in the six months. I went like three
Speaker 1: and a half months and not why and any news
Speaker 1: to the point me and my wife would be talking.
Speaker 1: I said, that's told. I said, I'm not trying to
Speaker 1: be mean, but what does what does that information do
Speaker 1: for our household? Right? Now how do we what do
Speaker 1: we take that information? How do we apply it to
Speaker 1: our household? She goes, well, I'll just let you know
Speaker 1: I said, I can't handle it. Information over though I can't.
Speaker 1: That doesn't benefit me to hear that twenty thousand strangers
Speaker 1: that I don't know are dying in this state. I
Speaker 1: can't go to that state. I can't fix them. I
Speaker 1: can't write a check to fix them. There's nothing I
Speaker 1: can do. So that information right now, all it does
Speaker 1: is feed more fear. And so I was like, ah,
Speaker 1: so I quit watching it. Now I've been watching a
Speaker 1: little bit, but I'm still like, Yeah, that hits that
Speaker 1: hits me in the wrong place. I'll turn it off.
Speaker 1: You want to have enough to be informed, but it's
Speaker 1: soul is especially right now where we are today, it's
Speaker 1: so easy to just have information. Here's why I'm at
Speaker 1: my new ass. Can't do nothing about it even if
Speaker 1: I knew. So what am I gonna do to change it? Nothing?
Speaker 1: Not nothing, nothing, Nathan Nathan. So I'm like, you know what,
Speaker 1: you know what I've done in the pandemic that's really
Speaker 1: helped me. My cooking game has come to a whole
Speaker 1: another level. Barbecue I did all I was barbecuing, I did, uh,
Speaker 1: I did send me the picture. Yeah, the beer can chicken.
Speaker 1: How about this? I used a beer can, but I
Speaker 1: put apple juice in one, sweet tea in another one
Speaker 1: and then coded it, put a brine and in a
Speaker 1: rub on it coffee coffee grounds and see it was
Speaker 1: that thing. Well it was, man, it was awesome. And
Speaker 1: that that it's just i've um. I picked up in
Speaker 1: uh we do dairy free, grouten free. So I picked
Speaker 1: up a Southern dairy free, gluten free, Southern buttermilk biscuit recipe.
Speaker 1: And it's actually good and they're fluffy. I used the
Speaker 1: coconut or almond that you're making biscuits, Well, I was.
Speaker 1: I was always taught. My grandmother had a catering business.
Speaker 1: She was younger, so she told me how to make biscuits. So,
Speaker 1: but you can't make them with We can't make them
Speaker 1: with the non dairy So I figured out, do coconut
Speaker 1: milk or almond milk. Bailey can't have almond milk, so
Speaker 1: we do coconut milk with white vinegar. But I don't
Speaker 1: like the tanging, this tartness, so I use lemon juice.
Speaker 1: That formulation as buttermilk, and then put all other stuff
Speaker 1: making powder. Uh, don't use too much sugar, use beet
Speaker 1: sugar did And so I had some buttermilk, uh, gluten free,
Speaker 1: dairy free, fluffy biscuits. And then what I do. I
Speaker 1: put some real sugar, and then I put some sentiment
Speaker 1: and then it got sentiment rolls. So we got and
Speaker 1: this hoigh, No, they were good. Peyton came over to
Speaker 1: the house, my oldest. That boy didn't even heat him up.
Speaker 1: He took the biscuit straight out of the zip black
Speaker 1: bag and ate them and said, yeah, they're good. Dad.
Speaker 1: So just that that's how I'm doing. Just find something.
Speaker 1: It's been great though. And in the pandemic we were
Speaker 1: also doing just to make it. Every three weeks, I
Speaker 1: would do fruity pebble rice Crisp retreats, So do the
Speaker 1: fruity pebbles now, I did Coco pebbles old fire, just
Speaker 1: getting us through it, man, And when they the kids saw,
Speaker 1: they were like, Dane, has been three weeks it all
Speaker 1: They're going those fruity pebbles killing them. So it was cool, man.
Speaker 1: We just we got through it the best way we could,
Speaker 1: and and we I wasn't eating like negatively. I was
Speaker 1: just every couple of weeks do some something that made
Speaker 1: it a change up, but a changeup on the routine
Speaker 1: and it was good. So I'm Steve Smith, singer, I'm
Speaker 1: Gerard Little John and this is cut to It. Thank
Speaker 1: you for your tom God bless you. I hope you
Speaker 1: see you again. Oh we are cut to It with
Speaker 1: Steve Smith Senior. That is Me is a production of
Speaker 1: Cut to It LLC, Balto Creative Media, The Black Effect
Speaker 1: and I Heart Radio. For more podcast from I Heart Radio,
Speaker 1: visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever
Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows from Cut to It.
Speaker 1: Executive producer Steve Smith, SINGR co host Gerard Little John,
Speaker 1: talent and booking manager Joe Fusci, social media manager Peyton
Speaker 1: Smith from Balto Creative Media. Cut to It is produced
Speaker 1: by Brian Balta Chevitch and Meredith Carter, with production existence
Speaker 1: by Alex Lebrek, Production manager Sarah Hollock, Theme music by
Speaker 1: Alex Johnson, lyrics and vocals by Anthony Hamilton. If you
Speaker 1: ain't heard about it, then we're about to let you know.
Speaker 1: It's all