Speaker 1: Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 2: Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how
Speaker 2: much baggage you claim and give us time and a
Speaker 2: termino and gage aid. We want to send you off
Speaker 2: in style. We wanna welcome you back home.
Speaker 1: Tell us all about it.
Speaker 2: We scared her? Was it fine? Now? Porn? Do you
Speaker 2: need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you
Speaker 2: need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Ride with Karen and Chris? Welcome to Do you need
Speaker 1: to ride?
Speaker 3: This is Chris Fairbanks and this is Karen Kilgaret. I
Speaker 3: almost forgot the name of our podcast.
Speaker 1: There was that that's weird, weird.
Speaker 3: I've been doing so many podcasts lately, I forgot what
Speaker 3: my own was called.
Speaker 2: Have you been so busy?
Speaker 3: Uh no, no, no, I haven't been doing many podcasts.
Speaker 1: That was just an excuse I made up for the unexplained.
Speaker 4: I just I watched those excuses where you can look
Speaker 4: them up on the internet, because then you're just going
Speaker 4: to get what they call ethard if you do that,
Speaker 4: it's so provable.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I know you're done for.
Speaker 3: Yeah, people are going to be like, you know what
Speaker 3: I've actually not heard you on any podcasts, and I
Speaker 3: have the Google to prove it.
Speaker 2: I looked it up. No, you haven't. Have you been
Speaker 2: playing golf?
Speaker 1: I played yesterday.
Speaker 3: I'm getting ready for a tournament, so I have to
Speaker 3: not Yeah, in Montana, just me and some comics and
Speaker 3: then some old NFL players for the Big Brothers and sisters.
Speaker 4: Oh, I think you've done this before. You've told some
Speaker 4: anecdotes from those Yes, yes, and so wonderful.
Speaker 3: I played yesterday with these two fun eighty year old
Speaker 3: guys and I wasn't playing well at first, and then
Speaker 3: I had a little bit of weed, and all of
Speaker 3: a sudden, I was focusing. But weed makes me want
Speaker 3: to talk to people, and I was I think I
Speaker 3: missed my dad. So I just started talking to these
Speaker 3: old guys. And one of them was like, I can't
Speaker 3: tell that's a ball or a candy wrapper. He's trying
Speaker 3: to find his ball, and I'm like, oh, that's a rapper.
Speaker 3: I can see far, but I can't see close up.
Speaker 3: I had to get glasses. It just happened one day
Speaker 3: and I was complaining about needing reading glasses, and then
Speaker 3: he was like, oh, yeah, I know, I have a
Speaker 3: glass eye, and then I really felt, oh yeah, I
Speaker 3: wasn't complaining wow really though, because it looks terrifical.
Speaker 1: That's the best glass eye.
Speaker 3: Then I just kept complimenting his glass eye because it
Speaker 3: really was not.
Speaker 2: Noticeable, not noticeable at all.
Speaker 3: Yeah, unless he cartoon initially started darting his eyes around,
Speaker 3: I suppose then I'd noticed. But it was a perfect
Speaker 3: glass eye, and he was able to golf with only
Speaker 3: one eye. I mean, I can't imagine having no.
Speaker 4: Peripheral I feel like any kind of medical complaint that
Speaker 4: you want to bring up, I wouldn't do it to
Speaker 4: people over the age of seventy.
Speaker 2: They're always going to be able to get you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, one or three or four up me yes, I uh.
Speaker 3: It was very embarrassing. It's just like when you try
Speaker 3: and talk about your mom dying and someone's like, oh,
Speaker 3: I know, my grandma died. It's like, well, that's not
Speaker 3: totally the name, unless, of course, your grandma raised you.
Speaker 1: That's a different situation, right, Karen.
Speaker 4: You know, here's the thing about everything is it's all
Speaker 4: in context.
Speaker 2: It is.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I shan't judge Anny's others. I'm not here to judge.
Speaker 4: Shan't I can't and want and want from here on out.
Speaker 2: Our guest today has played clubs and colleges.
Speaker 1: So many colleges.
Speaker 4: I mean, we got let's get out of the small talk,
Speaker 4: right because it's not. Oh okay, let's get into the
Speaker 4: bigger talk.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we got fish, We got fish to fry.
Speaker 3: Yeah, clubs and colleges all across this great land and Canada,
Speaker 3: where she also sometimes.
Speaker 1: Shoots a TV show. Put your hands together at home,
Speaker 1: Clap to yourself for Alice Wetterland. Bye bye Alice.
Speaker 2: Hey guys, welcome high, Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1: Am I right, do you shoot a resident alien in Canada?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 3: I knew just by looking at some footage that it
Speaker 3: wasn't Colorado. Those mountains you.
Speaker 2: Know your mountains man, I do.
Speaker 1: I'm a mountain man on site.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I knew it was a mountains on site, Yeah
Speaker 2: it was.
Speaker 1: It's mostly on screen.
Speaker 2: It's in Canada and Vancouver.
Speaker 3: We shoot that show, and so that's where you've been
Speaker 3: going and living for most way.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, how is it up there? How do you?
Speaker 2: How are you enjoying it up there? You know, Karen,
Speaker 2: I wish I could tell you I was having a
Speaker 2: good time. Oh, but no, what if I just didn't
Speaker 2: tell you.
Speaker 4: I wish I could tell you, You're like, but I
Speaker 4: can't say anything for the rest of this that's I
Speaker 4: can't go on the record about how much I'm enjoying it.
Speaker 2: I do enjoy the show. It's like the best show
Speaker 2: I've ever worked on and probably will.
Speaker 4: Ever m It's the one that Alan Tudik plays the alien. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: I love that guy.
Speaker 2: He's so funny. He's really a nice person and wonderful
Speaker 2: to have. And then everybody else on the show I love.
Speaker 2: There's nobody is bad, you know what I mean, when
Speaker 2: somebody's bad. Nobody's bad. And like I worked well anyway.
Speaker 1: Tell us names.
Speaker 2: And there's just like it's great. But this town is
Speaker 2: not my favorite place. I'm a city person. I really
Speaker 2: like to be in a highly populated like zone where
Speaker 2: there's just NonStop like I like a store, like a
Speaker 2: place that has stores that sell like zines and magic mushrooms.
Speaker 2: And then also like it's got a hard boiled egg restaurant,
Speaker 2: you know, Like I just like there to be multi healthy,
Speaker 2: you know. And and and Toronto was like that and
Speaker 2: I loved it. Yeah, but Vancouver is lacking and it's
Speaker 2: just like it's got places, you know, but it's also
Speaker 2: got like a lot of weird finance energy in the downtown.
Speaker 2: The downtown's very like the men of high finance really taken.
Speaker 1: Over, right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like giant buildings made for residents, but they're
Speaker 3: just empty and owned by at Yeah.
Speaker 2: There also is a funny thing about how Canadians like
Speaker 2: promote themselves as like, oh, well, we care about our
Speaker 2: people because we have healthcare and we do, you know,
Speaker 2: and then like you go to Hastings Street in Vancouver
Speaker 2: and it's like, to quote Andy Haynes a Moon's Apocalypse,
Speaker 2: it's like the worst like uncared for population of houseless
Speaker 2: people with immense drug problems that like are just like
Speaker 2: that were in a mental hospital. They had like a
Speaker 2: facility to deal with all the people that had mental
Speaker 2: health issues. And it was like I wasn't there when
Speaker 2: they had this, but then I guess ten years ago
Speaker 2: they just shut it down. And then they're like everybody's
Speaker 2: like where will we go? And they were like how
Speaker 2: about Street and Runt Yeah, and like that's just where
Speaker 2: it stayed. And it's insane, Like you're like I lived
Speaker 2: in New York I know what it's. You know, whatever
Speaker 2: I've been on skid Row, and skid Row is like
Speaker 2: the neighborhood from Edward Scissorhands. In comparison, really it's like whoa, okay, shades.
Speaker 2: They can't be like, feel like they're better than us,
Speaker 2: now what Canadians?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I feel like they always act like they're better than us.
Speaker 4: And that thing that happened is shutting down services and
Speaker 4: mental health facilities, is what happened in the eighties in
Speaker 4: California and why there is such a large unhoused population
Speaker 4: of people who truly do need help. They need someone
Speaker 4: to give them their medicine every day. There's a section
Speaker 4: of all basically all civilization that needs that kind of help.
Speaker 4: And when you shut that down to say, oh, we'll
Speaker 4: save on our taxes, you're absolutely screwing those people and your.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and is that why you support Rick?
Speaker 4: And the reason I'm here to do is, first of all,
Speaker 4: my friend Gwyneth and my friend Kim Kay both told
Speaker 4: me just tweet it, it'll be.
Speaker 2: Fun, you can get involved.
Speaker 4: But now I really believe, no more services for anybody.
Speaker 2: It's every man for himself, knife fight in the street
Speaker 2: when everybody like started endorsing him. I was like, what
Speaker 2: a choice, right, yeah, because if you go to Gwyneth's
Speaker 2: like Twitter, because I hadn't like looked, it was all
Speaker 2: her like talking about like greening bitcoin, and you're like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, it is. This is truly apocalyptic, like
Speaker 2: these people in their babel towers being like yeah, you know,
Speaker 2: just like what if money was electrons or whatever and
Speaker 2: what And then they're like I support for Caruso and
Speaker 2: you're like you never needed to say anything. No one
Speaker 2: asked you, no one needed this. It's just the most
Speaker 2: random celebrities of all time. It was like, I mean
Speaker 2: Mark Ruffalo, like riding so hard for Bernie was a
Speaker 2: little random, but it was like, Okay, I guess he
Speaker 2: like really is into this or whatever.
Speaker 1: Right, But the.
Speaker 4: Idea that you'd before Rick Caruso, when it's like he's
Speaker 4: a billionaire developer that we know, like those are the
Speaker 4: people that are ruining all cities because it's like just
Speaker 4: go and take money from other places that need it
Speaker 4: and build up into its busy obviously the Hunger Games.
Speaker 4: It's just it is so And then they tried to
Speaker 4: make it social media hit yah, and hey, you.
Speaker 2: Seem so stupid. Do you can't possibly they're so out
Speaker 2: of touch that they don't understand how stupid they seem
Speaker 2: to the people that they want to impress. Well, didn't work.
Speaker 2: That's the beautiful part.
Speaker 4: Karen Bess is like they're still counting votes for her,
Speaker 4: I know, like the gap is wide between her and
Speaker 4: it's like he spent so much of his own money.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 3: Someone just entered the chat that two of my favorite
Speaker 3: cats and one.
Speaker 2: What if her cat's name was Rick Caruso? And you
Speaker 2: know what I said before I knew the candidate. So
Speaker 2: this cat is actually great at Zoom because he really
Speaker 2: doesn't mind being held like in a certain like he
Speaker 2: likes he like doesn't mind this if I do this.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and he's really photogenic, you know, he just like, yes,
Speaker 2: he's beautiful.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I've seen this cat in other Zoom interviews because I
Speaker 3: was watching trying to watch clips of Resident Alien and
Speaker 3: I ended up watching a lot of like promotional interviews
Speaker 3: you did and your kitty is on your lap and
Speaker 3: pretty much him.
Speaker 4: Yeah, did she blow up Vancouver in those interviews too?
Speaker 4: I mean did she really attack the city itself?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: So it brings.
Speaker 2: Now I didn't bring them there. I brought them to
Speaker 2: Toronto one time and it was a disaster. And the
Speaker 2: other reason it's like I can't go to like I
Speaker 2: can't travel within where I'm at. Like if I go
Speaker 2: and I'm working somewhere and I bring my cats, they're
Speaker 2: like really high maintenance. They don't you know, they like
Speaker 2: need I get screamed at the second I get home
Speaker 2: with like a laundry list of stuff that went wrong.
Speaker 2: Sometimes just want to like freak out. If he can't
Speaker 2: find the other one, be like and I'm like, he's
Speaker 2: over here, and we go and show.
Speaker 3: Him and he's like, okay, I forgive you then for
Speaker 3: hiding the other cat from me, And.
Speaker 2: I'm like, it was you didn't look. He's always forgetting
Speaker 2: about one of the rooms. He's got like an acorn brain.
Speaker 2: He thinks that really like, well, I didn't check the
Speaker 2: White House. He thinks that room's the White House. That's not.
Speaker 2: You don't get it. Who's president?
Speaker 1: Probably don't even know that either, cat brain.
Speaker 2: I know who's president. I like that cat's markings. The
Speaker 2: marking on that cat's head makes.
Speaker 4: It look like he is a little bob where the
Speaker 4: bangs are parted just on either side of his eyes,
Speaker 4: Like it looks like he is a mop top who
Speaker 4: got the haircut?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's edgy.
Speaker 3: I've only had cats and white cats, and there's that's
Speaker 3: an all in one.
Speaker 1: That's a great cat.
Speaker 2: White cats are more rare.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know what. I just got lucky early
Speaker 3: on with the white cats.
Speaker 2: I learned about that, Like when a cat is in utero,
Speaker 2: the way that the markings are determined is that there's
Speaker 2: like a certain amount of like pigmentation that's coded for
Speaker 2: that cat. And as it like spreads out from the
Speaker 2: like the back, the ridge is their spine and this
Speaker 2: coast are like randomly spreads out, so it's literally like
Speaker 2: it's being dripped with paint and then whereever it goes
Speaker 2: where it ends up.
Speaker 1: Oh wow, isn't that funny?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's that Brittie just didn't have enough to get
Speaker 2: all the way to get all the way to close
Speaker 2: those bangs on the front. Yeah, and that's something I
Speaker 2: know and he doesn't know. Now, did you read that
Speaker 2: on your phone? No?
Speaker 1: But I did.
Speaker 2: I did read something recently, so my a friend and
Speaker 2: friend who is you would know I was talking to
Speaker 2: him about spiders, and I was like, did you know
Speaker 2: they're all girls? And he was like, who told you that?
Speaker 2: And I was like, well, they're all girls because the
Speaker 2: bigger the spiders that you see are big, and the
Speaker 2: and they're the male ones are small and you can't
Speaker 2: see him because they're so so small. And I was
Speaker 2: like very confident about this, and then like I had
Speaker 2: never said it. I always just kind of like knew
Speaker 2: it as a fact, and then when I said it
Speaker 2: out loud, I was like, oh, that's preposterous, Like there's
Speaker 2: not male to rantleas of course there are, yeah, because
Speaker 2: that means all spiders are girls, which can't be.
Speaker 3: I think with black widows on cartoon idea, you're on
Speaker 3: you're onto something because black widows the big, big scary
Speaker 3: spiders with the red hourglass.
Speaker 1: You never see the boy black widows.
Speaker 2: And oh that hour glass.
Speaker 1: They're little and they're like, hey, nineteen fifties, whoa.
Speaker 2: I like, look at the figure on that venomous legged,
Speaker 2: not in little the gams.
Speaker 3: I am very attracted to black widowed spiders and that's
Speaker 3: my little kink.
Speaker 1: I hope one day one bites me literally little. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: let's talk about.
Speaker 2: Our tiniest kinks. It's I like when there's like a
Speaker 2: vial that somebody wears around their neck.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I M I'm not kidding.
Speaker 3: For a little while, I had a real vial with
Speaker 3: real crack rocks in it. I can't remember where I
Speaker 3: acquired it, but I just kept it because I thought
Speaker 3: it was funny and I didn't think that Wow, if
Speaker 3: someone caught me with this, I'd be in trouble.
Speaker 1: But I wanted to wear it as a hilarious necklace.
Speaker 1: I was young.
Speaker 2: A hilarious necklace.
Speaker 3: No one would ever stop and say, is that a
Speaker 3: vial of crack from a movie?
Speaker 2: You're trying to bring it up. Yeah, does everybody have
Speaker 2: in their necklaces?
Speaker 3: I'm always playing with it and dangling it. Oh, this
Speaker 3: old thing.
Speaker 2: It's just cracks are in your jewels.
Speaker 3: I really wish I could remember how I found it.
Speaker 3: I think I found it. There is any answer.
Speaker 2: So speaking to like when you were younger and not
Speaker 2: as funny as you are now, Chris, I was bsically
Speaker 2: on a girl girl's weekend, and I'm a woman I'm
Speaker 2: friends with told me that her her friends got divorced.
Speaker 2: And I have two boys who became teenagers during the
Speaker 2: divorce and the guy, the husband is awful and is
Speaker 2: radicalizing the kids and turning them into like neo cons
Speaker 2: and misogynists. And you know, there's like this like whole
Speaker 2: movement online to like basically get young white men into
Speaker 2: being terrorists, you know, domestic like Patriot Front terrorists by
Speaker 2: like getting them in with misogyny. The way that they
Speaker 2: like coax men is with misogyny. So I had and
Speaker 2: I like was hearing this story and I was like, so,
Speaker 2: there's two kids that we know, and I don't know
Speaker 2: what excuse I would have, but I really want to
Speaker 2: be a part of their rehabilit llotation personally, like I
Speaker 2: want I want to be the one. And then I
Speaker 2: was like, I could make a camp for boys that's
Speaker 2: like a scared straight camp run by like bulldog lesbians.
Speaker 1: How do you lure them in just with things like
Speaker 1: our parents.
Speaker 2: Send them like sort of like a you know, like
Speaker 2: like in scared straight camps, you know, I don't know,
Speaker 2: more just involved or something. And then they get there
Speaker 2: and one of the classes is like this is what
Speaker 2: I conceived of, and I'm sure you guys could improve
Speaker 2: upon this. But there's like a stand up comedy portion
Speaker 2: where they perform at the end of the camp, you know.
Speaker 2: But the first thing they do is they write a
Speaker 2: stand up set based on whatever their favorite comedian is,
Speaker 2: and then they go to a town, the nearby town,
Speaker 2: and they perform it and then they just eat it right,
Speaker 2: and they bomb so hard and it's mostly like women
Speaker 2: laughing at them at their expense and like you know,
Speaker 2: really an ego blow, right, and then they come back
Speaker 2: and then there's like a whole stand up comedy like
Speaker 2: boot camp that helps them to like understand why they're
Speaker 2: not funny and like breaks down their egos and like
Speaker 2: makes them you know, sort of like empathetic humans, like
Speaker 2: angrier through more militaristic and more. No, no, it like
Speaker 2: breaks them down bye. But like the fun part is that,
Speaker 2: like I get to have fun making fun of them.
Speaker 2: Will we break them down thoughts?
Speaker 1: And then will there be activities like canoeing and archery? Yes?
Speaker 2: I was also thinking there be like men who like
Speaker 2: have been deprogrammed that would be like part of the
Speaker 2: council counselorship, you.
Speaker 1: Know, right right, yeah, just like a.
Speaker 2: Real Jeff Bridge's energy. Just like yeah, I was like,
Speaker 2: well that whoror you know, excuse me, we don't say that,
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, get them to say things and correct themselves
Speaker 3: in front of the boys, that would be a good
Speaker 3: massive Yeah.
Speaker 2: It's catching on. So it's like a kickstarter.
Speaker 3: Now, that's kind of I mean, that's what Bible camp
Speaker 3: was for me, except it didn't work.
Speaker 2: It's the opposite.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's the opposite. Yeah, I think it's great. It's
Speaker 3: a great idea. You just got to lure them with activity.
Speaker 3: You got to make a brochure with beautiful It seems.
Speaker 4: To me though, there's kind of there there's a problem
Speaker 4: solved right there where if the dad wants them to
Speaker 4: be neocons, then there's a great chance that went around
Speaker 4: the time of them being fifteen, they're going to be like, hey,
Speaker 4: fuck you and good then go to you know, start
Speaker 4: be theater students or something.
Speaker 2: There's like a built in rebellion. Yeah, but there is this,
Speaker 2: like it's it's a greater issue of the like online
Speaker 2: coercing of like a whole generation of young men into
Speaker 2: becoming Yes, that's very real, and I want to be
Speaker 2: a part of undoing that, you know, Yeah.
Speaker 3: Not just the dad, but online more is probably even
Speaker 3: a bigger threat.
Speaker 2: You know how in like activism, there's like this whole
Speaker 2: thing We've talked about it in the past couple of
Speaker 2: years of like certain people having the energy for things
Speaker 2: that other people don't have, you know, and like not
Speaker 2: making all your black friends explain everything all the time
Speaker 2: because like it sucks to have to re engage with
Speaker 2: your trauma, et cetera. So like I feel like of
Speaker 2: women in the in living in like a rape culture.
Speaker 2: I'm not a survivor of like actual rape or anything.
Speaker 2: Like I've had assaults, but not you know, And so
Speaker 2: there's a lot of stuff that like I feel like
Speaker 2: I do have the energy for and like extra energy
Speaker 2: for it, you know. So I would like to put
Speaker 2: myself in those in those rage rage cages, you know. Yes,
Speaker 2: Like that's how I feel my stand up aspires to be.
Speaker 2: I agree.
Speaker 4: I mean, I think you you like to touch right
Speaker 4: onto things when you do your stand up, and then
Speaker 4: you actually do make it funny. My thing is that
Speaker 4: I think the humiliation aspect of your camp concept is
Speaker 4: actually maybe gas on the already problematic barbecue fire that
Speaker 4: we're having.
Speaker 2: My idea is true. My idea is take that the
Speaker 2: idea is that a lot of these kids like they
Speaker 2: get like really insular in this world and their ideas
Speaker 2: are kind of untested in reality. And then the busting
Speaker 2: out into reality is like an act of violence. That's
Speaker 2: when they end in the world. And then the justice
Speaker 2: system enters the equation and you know, enters the chat
Speaker 2: and like one thing or another happens. But like this
Speaker 2: would be an idea of like like the what's the
Speaker 2: thing from Stranger Things upside Down? Yeah, it'd be like
Speaker 2: the upside down where you like enter a world where
Speaker 2: like all of your ideas are like immediately tested and
Speaker 2: proven false in this like really sort of like Ninja
Speaker 2: Warrior way.
Speaker 3: Yeah, turning someone stand up down by not laughing is
Speaker 3: a good way to do that.
Speaker 2: But you we all do it so we all know
Speaker 2: what the experience of bombing can do to your soul.
Speaker 2: The humbling. It's incredibly humbling, and like, I honestly feel
Speaker 2: like more people should go through it because it gives
Speaker 2: you this feeling of like you're all the self doubt
Speaker 2: you could ever possibly muster in your life enters you know,
Speaker 2: into your brain at once. It's crazy and it's just
Speaker 2: like and then you have to get through it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: if you want to keep doing it, yep, and you
Speaker 2: do somehow, and you you know, it's it's kind of crazy, right,
Speaker 2: like like a whole room of people just told you
Speaker 2: you're not funny. They were like emphatic about it. And
Speaker 2: the idea that like seventy five people would all at
Speaker 2: once tell you you're not funny, and that you would be like,
Speaker 2: but maybe you know that's crazy. Maybe I'm going to
Speaker 2: try again. I'm going to try again, you know. And
Speaker 2: so you start to learn that like what that you
Speaker 2: have to learn all about audiences and oops, reading rooms
Speaker 2: and like all all about to learn about why your
Speaker 2: technique yeah technique and you know, just being grateful and oops. Right,
Speaker 2: I must have a spit take onto my own mic.
Speaker 2: I made a desk pad for my desk because like
Speaker 2: all of like my desk is like shitty ikeia, so
Speaker 2: like it's like really you hit it, and it's like
Speaker 2: I made this desk pad. Oh it's soft, Well it's
Speaker 2: really soft.
Speaker 1: It's you make a big soft lunch tray.
Speaker 2: Oh are you crafty? I'm so crafty. Yeah, I like
Speaker 2: super crafty. Behind me, you'll see the whole there's the
Speaker 2: sewing machine is here.
Speaker 1: So you've been making clothing.
Speaker 2: All my life?
Speaker 1: Out all my life? Oh so soft? Oh got it?
Speaker 1: You put you put thumbtacks there by your elbow.
Speaker 2: A craft still a bunch of thumbstuff, some tacks in it.
Speaker 2: And I'm like, it'll be fine, so close, I'll just
Speaker 2: work with it.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I really feel like everyone should learn to use a
Speaker 3: sewing machine.
Speaker 1: I had a patch for my jacket.
Speaker 3: And I I I don't even know how to go.
Speaker 2: I'm horrified you're gonna want to hand so that though.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Oh my dad did it on he just fall.
Speaker 1: He did a great job.
Speaker 2: Patches don't eat. Sewing machines won't work for patches. You
Speaker 2: gottat you gotta hands.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it went through the patch and this denim jacket.
Speaker 3: I can show you the final project. But maybe it
Speaker 3: wasn't good for the motor of the machine or something.
Speaker 2: It was well, no, it's the agility, like to get
Speaker 2: around the little areas.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah it was.
Speaker 3: He definitely was working hard at it, but I was
Speaker 3: just My point is, my dad knows how I's use
Speaker 3: a sewing machine, and I should as well.
Speaker 1: I think it would be cool to make clothing. I
Speaker 1: did not know that you did that.
Speaker 2: Oh, I love I love it. I do it every
Speaker 2: once in a while, but I don't I don't do
Speaker 2: it enough. Like I did spend two and a half
Speaker 2: full days sun up to sundown working on a Renaissance
Speaker 2: festival costume for myself and my partner and he I
Speaker 2: had like bloomers, we had a matching and it was
Speaker 2: like the style what was sort of like Italian Renaissance.
Speaker 2: And I can probably show you photos, but it's just
Speaker 2: like it doesn't do it justice to be like I
Speaker 2: can show you the actual bodice that I.
Speaker 4: May bring up most cast photo of the borgo. You're
Speaker 4: just like, it's just a.
Speaker 2: Game of Thrones, hun all. So this is like this
Speaker 2: here is like the best part that I did is
Speaker 2: the bodice.
Speaker 1: WHOA, that's amazing, amazing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like and then yeah, and I like spray
Speaker 2: painted these to be tarnished a little bit. And then
Speaker 2: it has like one of those skirts with like a split,
Speaker 2: you know. And I was so proud and I made
Speaker 2: an underdress. It's all there. I was so proud. I
Speaker 2: had pearls in my fucking hair and what happened may
Speaker 2: care a costume as well. He had one of those
Speaker 2: poof hats with a feather. Oh yeah, And I was
Speaker 2: just like yes. And then we got there and everybody's like, yeah,
Speaker 2: we also.
Speaker 1: Do that, right, yeah.
Speaker 4: You just you just basically got in the front door
Speaker 4: of just like yep, you're you're allowed to come in
Speaker 4: with them.
Speaker 2: And some people just didn't and they're like we didn't,
Speaker 2: and so we were like we did too.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it was.
Speaker 2: Just like, oh fuck, this sucks, Like we look like
Speaker 2: we're in Shrek. And so we went to the mall.
Speaker 1: That is fully a Shrek dress when you just showed.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And so we just took the outfits to the mall.
Speaker 2: And then did you get a big response at the mall?
Speaker 2: I like people there was like in Nordstrom, there was
Speaker 2: like two chairs with a small stool between betwixt them,
Speaker 2: and then there was a father and a mother sitting
Speaker 2: in the chairs and then the son like it balanced.
Speaker 2: It was. It was such a tableau that I was like,
Speaker 2: what if I thought this was royalty? So I like
Speaker 2: went up and I like bowed deeply to them. You know,
Speaker 2: you like got it. You know. It was just great.
Speaker 2: Like we went to Denttai fun and like pretended to
Speaker 2: not understand anything, and it was great.
Speaker 1: That's a good idea.
Speaker 3: Actually, rather than go to a Renaissance festival where everyone's
Speaker 3: doing it, everyone's going to have a outc costuming each other,
Speaker 3: just go to the mall check.
Speaker 2: Out my TikTok for the listeners at home, because I
Speaker 2: did a TikTok and it was the most successful TikTok
Speaker 2: I've ever done. It was like eight hundred thousand views
Speaker 2: and like there's like a I think most of the
Speaker 2: comments are because people were worried because I was doing
Speaker 2: it on an escalator and they were just millions of
Speaker 2: comments of people being like don't you're you shouldn't do that?
Speaker 1: What did you do it? Just like it sucked in
Speaker 1: the machinery.
Speaker 2: I just went on the escalator and I pretended to
Speaker 2: like be from the Renaissance, and I like walked and
Speaker 2: thought it was a regular stairs. I like kind of
Speaker 2: without looking, go around the corner, and then the minute
Speaker 2: it starts moving, it's like and it was like nobody
Speaker 2: was noticing it in the mall itself. So the TikTok
Speaker 2: is just like what is this person? And uh? It
Speaker 2: did really well, and they were like do a series
Speaker 2: and I think I might.
Speaker 4: That's a great yes of the Renaissance lady, Yeah in
Speaker 4: modern times, yes, yeah, yes, that's a great idea, so fun.
Speaker 3: Yeah, when I go to a Renaissance face, I don't dress.
Speaker 3: I just ran to a snake and put it around
Speaker 3: my neck. No one messes with me while I'm juggling.
Speaker 3: I get a little tired of people that are actually
Speaker 3: scared of escalators.
Speaker 1: Like I have a lot of friends there.
Speaker 2: I love getting tired of that. I love that being
Speaker 2: here until you die.
Speaker 3: On that it's done top here for me right other
Speaker 3: than you know, and then below that strife, struggling names top,
Speaker 3: but up top, these people hesitantly get on an escalator
Speaker 3: like it's going to eat their toes off.
Speaker 1: I mean, so.
Speaker 4: They've had most people have had a ton of practice,
Speaker 4: and they can't pretend they have it. And unless there's
Speaker 4: a storyline of like I'm from the forest, but for
Speaker 4: the most part you've done it before. Just take the
Speaker 4: second one. Yeah, wait, one, go to your I.
Speaker 2: Think people are like kids, and I'm like, well, yeah,
Speaker 2: yeah kid, yeah, but kids are in danger by virtue
Speaker 2: of being stupid and small.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I as if a kid falls down and their
Speaker 3: hair is suddenly on the escalator, then we have a problem.
Speaker 1: I understand that if a.
Speaker 2: Kid falls down and their hair is on fire.
Speaker 1: Sure they're already They're already.
Speaker 2: I've already got the hair fire.
Speaker 4: I think we can all just walk away knowing we
Speaker 4: had nothing to do with it, and we don't have
Speaker 4: to worry, and we need to walk away, and we
Speaker 4: walk away these days.
Speaker 3: Let those kids cool off, just walk away t k.
Speaker 2: Ce oh ltk. Let those kids.
Speaker 1: Let the kids still kids. Let's let those kids.
Speaker 2: Let those kids just cool it down.
Speaker 4: So else, wait, your renaissance lady in modern times is
Speaker 4: potentially the TikTok series.
Speaker 2: You might do? Yeah, yeah, I mean it takes quite
Speaker 2: a bit of effort to put on the whole thing,
Speaker 2: you know, and get around, but I would it was
Speaker 2: very fun.
Speaker 4: Could you rent a horse and go to a drive through?
Speaker 4: I just would love to pick Thomas yeakey little bit.
Speaker 2: Keeth pitch on it, because I was thinking about would
Speaker 2: you do, like what maybe go to like a gym,
Speaker 2: but your dress keeps getting caught and just like you
Speaker 2: couldn't get what are you even? Like why are people
Speaker 2: doing things at the gym? You know? Like what is
Speaker 2: even that.
Speaker 4: Yes, going up and beseeching people, I be seech you,
Speaker 4: who are you running from? And then they're like pulling
Speaker 4: out an AirPod?
Speaker 1: Ye what Yeah, I'd bequeath your will? Is that what
Speaker 1: you did? You grow up to?
Speaker 3: Modern day people like a security guardens be like many pardons,
Speaker 3: my vassal or whatever.
Speaker 2: I did that a lot, and people either loved it
Speaker 2: or they had no time for it.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: It was really funny to watch people like, like, were
Speaker 2: you in Los Angeles? Yeah?
Speaker 4: I feel like people here it's either their tourists and
Speaker 4: they love it and they're like thank god someone has
Speaker 4: a costume on, or it's people who are like I
Speaker 4: got to get up at six for my own job
Speaker 4: doing this exact same thing.
Speaker 2: Right, I'm going to keep but like I think I'm
Speaker 2: going to keep it small. So like, uh, let's start
Speaker 2: with like another mall, maybe drinking fountains, you know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, just post up at the drinking fountain like you're
Speaker 3: in charge of the water supply.
Speaker 2: No. No, I'll be going to the drinking fountain and
Speaker 2: the water comes out and it's like, oh, from where
Speaker 2: does it spring forth?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: From how the kind we have to fill up your
Speaker 2: water bottle, you know, yeah, and you're just trying to
Speaker 2: figure it out.
Speaker 1: That is yeah.
Speaker 2: One.
Speaker 3: That's like many scenes in a row from Bill and
Speaker 3: Ted where they're baffled by the technology of modern times.
Speaker 1: That have to also, I have to.
Speaker 2: Watch Bill and Ted so I don't just repeat everything
Speaker 2: Bill and Ted.
Speaker 3: To do everything they didn't do. That movie was missing
Speaker 3: a lot of possible.
Speaker 2: We've gone forward in technology since then so far.
Speaker 1: You know what, screw it? I think you.
Speaker 3: I think you too should go to a water slide
Speaker 3: in full renaissance guard. Yes, people will get it.
Speaker 4: You're the missing character from the first Bill and Ted
Speaker 4: movie that they never talked to.
Speaker 2: You're the Renaissance lady. People always talk about Bill and Ted,
Speaker 2: But what about what's the girl name that rhymes with Bill?
Speaker 2: Jill Phyllis and.
Speaker 1: Meg, Meg, Ted and Meg.
Speaker 3: If you speak fast enough, rhyme totally perfectly together.
Speaker 2: Jill and Meg, Bill and Ted, like Nicki Minaj could
Speaker 2: make it rhyme.
Speaker 3: I think that's terrific. I think, are you still playing baseball?
Speaker 3: Why aren't you playing a lot of baseball? I'm playing
Speaker 3: in a baseball You're playing in a baseball league. Inside one. Yes,
Speaker 3: it's like a.
Speaker 2: It's like a I guess they're refer to as like
Speaker 2: beer leagues, sure, because it's adult drinking. And that there's
Speaker 2: wood bats, so we have that and we only have
Speaker 2: we yeah, pretty much only have wood bats. And then
Speaker 2: it's hard fastball overhand pitching. Probably our fastest pitcher is
Speaker 2: like around sixty eight miles an hour, and we have Yeah,
Speaker 2: I guess we have five five teams in the league
Speaker 2: right now. It's I love it. It's I've been playing
Speaker 2: baseball since I moved here like ten years ago. I
Speaker 2: joined a team with some friends of mine that didn't
Speaker 2: do comedy. I didn't have a ton of comedy friends yet,
Speaker 2: so they were like, let's just make this team. And
Speaker 2: I didn't understand what we were like, I'm like, how
Speaker 2: are we just playing baseball? What is there always going
Speaker 2: to play against us? And I guess that like Parks
Speaker 2: and Recreation has like an adult league which is quite competitive,
Speaker 2: and we joined that, and then they joined and then
Speaker 2: eventually three years later they decided to like move up
Speaker 2: a rung from the single A to the double A,
Speaker 2: and I just I don't do that. I was very
Speaker 2: good at baseball when I was in like seventh and
Speaker 2: eighth grade, and I just never got better. I'm still
Speaker 2: exactly that good.
Speaker 3: Oh that's good though, to stay. I mean usually we
Speaker 3: all just lose it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I wasn't good enough for that to like
Speaker 2: be on varsity teams. Yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: I stayed literally the same skills.
Speaker 4: You know how the game works, and you can, like
Speaker 4: you can get in there and participate, but no one,
Speaker 4: you're not going to bat home the winning.
Speaker 2: Nobody's going to rely on me for the winning hit.
Speaker 4: And there's a chance they might say, try to hit
Speaker 4: it toward her, and then you might surprise them with, actually, hey,
Speaker 4: I can catch.
Speaker 2: The greatest thing about that is that no one can
Speaker 2: try to hit towards me because I am the catcher. Yes,
Speaker 2: brilliant mode the great I love it. I can because
Speaker 2: it doesn't bother my knees to be in that position
Speaker 2: for a really long time. Also, my boyfriend's the pitcher.
Speaker 2: So we're experimenting with this new thing where instead of
Speaker 2: like doing one, two, three signals, we just do like vibes,
Speaker 2: like we just sort of make like.
Speaker 1: You know, oh yeah, because you can talk about it
Speaker 1: at home.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I sort of try to communicate like this,
Speaker 2: and you know whatever that means to you. You know,
Speaker 2: at the pitcher, you send me that ball and dragging
Speaker 2: my index figure across my neck, like does that mean
Speaker 2: the killer pitch? Or like you're in big trouble right
Speaker 2: if you don't, what does it mean? And it's for
Speaker 2: him to interpret and then give back to me. Is
Speaker 2: it work your experiment?
Speaker 1: No, a lot of confusion.
Speaker 2: No, we're actually we're starting our season next week. Oh,
Speaker 2: we'll see, We'll have to see it in action.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I knew you played baseball because we did a show
Speaker 3: once and you were fully dressed up for baseball.
Speaker 2: That's crazy. I remember that was a really long time ago.
Speaker 3: Yeah, isn't that strange how much time has passed. We're
Speaker 3: getting old and the earth keeps spinning nuts.
Speaker 4: I actually played in a co ed entertainment softball league
Speaker 4: in the mid to late nineties, and I was on
Speaker 4: speed at the time. So I was really good because
Speaker 4: I had played high school softball. It's a big deal
Speaker 4: in my hometown. All the girls play softball and you
Speaker 4: you're supposed.
Speaker 2: To be good.
Speaker 1: It's a whole thing.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So anyway, I was like, where are you from? And
Speaker 2: where are you from from.
Speaker 4: Northern California, from Pamama, and so it's like small town,
Speaker 4: you know, there's only a couple options and the girls.
Speaker 4: It's like girls are playing what are considered boys sports
Speaker 4: and being very competitive in them because you have as
Speaker 4: much attention and kind of pressure as the boys do.
Speaker 4: It's not like people people take it very seriously and
Speaker 4: get into it. So then you are driven to be like,
Speaker 4: either you want to go on to play in high
Speaker 4: school or you quit. And so everybody and we like that.
Speaker 4: I knew went on to play in high school. So
Speaker 4: when people were like all the comics were like, hey,
Speaker 4: let's play in this this softball league. It'll be really fun,
Speaker 4: I was like, sure, it'll be fun. But I was
Speaker 4: also like high out of my mind, and then of
Speaker 4: course it was not fun. It was just an exercise
Speaker 4: in insane sexism, where like these old dudes would be.
Speaker 2: Like, hey, so you're playing second Boost.
Speaker 1: That means there's.
Speaker 2: More might come to you.
Speaker 4: And I was like, I literally was like screaming at
Speaker 4: like these old like road comics. I'd be like, do
Speaker 4: not explain how to play second based to me? Like
Speaker 4: I was out of my mind because it was just
Speaker 4: so fucking It was like, why are you assuming that
Speaker 4: I don't know?
Speaker 2: If I'm standing here.
Speaker 3: Last night, my friend Mary was beating They were like
Speaker 3: playing doubles pool down here, and she was kicking their
Speaker 3: ass and the guy she was playing with was missing
Speaker 3: every ball, but he's still was going up and pointing
Speaker 3: to where she needed to hit on the ball.
Speaker 2: That's She's like cleaning onto it, clean on.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm winning, I'm better than you, and he still
Speaker 3: couldn't that obstacle.
Speaker 2: You know, you would have loved this thing that happened
Speaker 2: last season and Resident Alien the they wrote a Baseball
Speaker 2: like arc into my characters storyline that where I meet
Speaker 2: the love interest in my in that season and in Canada,
Speaker 2: like it's just not that big of a deal, like
Speaker 2: baseball isn't really much of a sport. Hockey is so
Speaker 2: dominates so much in recreational like team sports, that many
Speaker 2: people don't know about baseball, And so they had hired
Speaker 2: extras that were from a baseball team so that they
Speaker 2: could approximate, you know what, you know, the background acting.
Speaker 2: But everyone else besides the extras and me like didn't
Speaker 2: know anything about baseball, Like the director, you know, the
Speaker 2: CD writer did because he wrote the scene, but he
Speaker 2: wasn't there the whole day. The head writer, the director
Speaker 2: didn't know. None of the crew, not a single crew member.
Speaker 2: My co star didn't know. Never swung about. In fact,
Speaker 2: he did swing about in that scene and threw out
Speaker 2: his hip for like months. Oh wow, And like all
Speaker 2: of the other extras in the stand like no one.
Speaker 2: So the whole day, the whole two days that we
Speaker 2: were there, it was like we had to block out
Speaker 2: and it was like the director going like would this happen?
Speaker 2: Alice ex playing baseball to all of these men yet again,
Speaker 2: over and over and over again, people being like is
Speaker 2: this accurate to me?
Speaker 1: Have you been able to watch it yet? It's it
Speaker 1: in the second.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that stuff is out already, that's.
Speaker 3: We already is hilarious for you to watch. Is it
Speaker 3: just feel going through tough?
Speaker 2: Because like we you know, I know that that was
Speaker 2: you know, fourteen to twenty eight hours of my time
Speaker 2: and then I a four seconds you know what I mean? Like, yeah,
Speaker 2: so much of it the scene is like me having
Speaker 2: dreamy eyes at this guy, and then other plotlines from
Speaker 2: other people from the town. You know that you cut
Speaker 2: back to one cool thing that like someone running one time,
Speaker 2: you know, and yeah, but I just remember that well,
Speaker 2: you know, and that's what most of the show is.
Speaker 2: Like you're like, oh man, I was so excited for
Speaker 2: the scene. Let's see what they did with it. Let's
Speaker 2: see it's gone right, it's done already, It's done.
Speaker 4: Also, that's such a weird thing of like baseball being
Speaker 4: so ubiquitous here and then you're in a place that
Speaker 4: everybody speaks English. It's very similar to your home country.
Speaker 4: There's not a ton of differences except for this one
Speaker 4: that's so beyond where that is the resident alien experience
Speaker 4: for yourself.
Speaker 2: They made me practice baseball, even though I was like,
Speaker 2: just came from baseball, so I really anyway, So they
Speaker 2: rented out a field so I could do it, and
Speaker 2: it was the field we'd be working on. So I
Speaker 2: got to the field and I was like, huh, Like,
Speaker 2: I wonder if they meant to do this. I called
Speaker 2: the director or the head writer, Chris Up, and I
Speaker 2: was like, hey, it's a little league field, just maying
Speaker 2: sure that you wanted that because it's very small and
Speaker 2: I can like see the scoreboard. It's like I can
Speaker 2: touch it from so and he just they didn't, so
Speaker 2: they didn't mean to do that. His locations just didn't
Speaker 2: know there was and I quote two different sizes of baseball.
Speaker 2: They don't know. It's not there in their vernaculars. Well,
Speaker 2: if it was, it was a nice hockey rink, we
Speaker 2: don't have no problem. Yes, like, yeah, we know that,
Speaker 2: but you know how Google exists here, like what, so
Speaker 2: we figured it out. It looks fine, doesn't look anything.
Speaker 2: Nothing about it is different literally fields like sometimes the
Speaker 2: gravel's gray, which is strange, but whatever.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I wouldn't even notice that, but I stopped
Speaker 3: after little leg.
Speaker 1: I don't know about the big boy fields.
Speaker 2: Yeah, big boy fields are red closer.
Speaker 3: Oh, I've seen the stains on men's shirts after the
Speaker 3: Dodgers and the sorrow in their eyes they fell down
Speaker 3: on dirt.
Speaker 4: Alice, do you want to talk at all about your
Speaker 4: podcasts or do you or do you not want?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I want to hear yeah, okay, no, no, don't
Speaker 2: make me.
Speaker 4: You have too while you have these other jobs we're
Speaker 4: talking about. So one of your podcasts is a Missus
Speaker 4: Mazel podcast.
Speaker 2: Correct, Yeah, they're both on hiatus now though, so and
Speaker 2: and Treks has been on hiatus forever because basically Verona
Speaker 2: and Veronica and I wanted to change formats and we
Speaker 2: could never. We just Veronica and I are two people
Speaker 2: who are not the people that should do the thing,
Speaker 2: Like one of us need to be the one, you
Speaker 2: know what I mean, and neither of us are the one. Right,
Speaker 2: It's like a competition on who can be more late
Speaker 2: to something. It's insane. So we are just late for
Speaker 2: getting it back started, and I think I'm gonna have
Speaker 2: to be the one. And then the Mazel podcast is
Speaker 2: on hiatus because Mazel itself and so I was recording
Speaker 2: that with with Kevin when I was in Vancouver and
Speaker 2: with when I do a podcast with Kevin, Kevin's the one.
Speaker 2: Yes he is, and that's why that happens. Yeah, Yes,
Speaker 2: he's extremely organized, yeah, which is like passive aggressive but whatever.
Speaker 2: It is kind of rude.
Speaker 4: That makes me think of when Chris and I first started,
Speaker 4: and it would be like what it was a bit
Speaker 4: of a like, first of all, who could get a
Speaker 4: person at the very last minute? And second, which is
Speaker 4: kind of hard for a let us pick you up
Speaker 4: at the airport stand up comic podcast.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's it, that's what it used to be.
Speaker 1: We like, that's a word we don't like to say anymore.
Speaker 4: We can't lax is inaccessible, We just can't go there anymore.
Speaker 4: And also then quarantine shut it all down because then
Speaker 4: it's like, yeah, we're involving people in our air exchange.
Speaker 4: But yeah, it used to be the same way where
Speaker 4: it would be like, we have to do.
Speaker 2: Another one, how are we going to do this?
Speaker 4: And both people who are have both lived our lives.
Speaker 4: I think I free to say this about you, Chris,
Speaker 4: where we both have we're the kind of people that
Speaker 4: other people do stuff and then we're like, sounds good,
Speaker 4: follow that person absolutely, So we were extra frustrated where
Speaker 4: it was just like, well, okay, fine, now I'm the
Speaker 4: person saying to you we have to do this.
Speaker 2: Okay, fine, let's do it. And then yeah, I've had
Speaker 2: that experience so many times. In fact, Sean Peerlman and
Speaker 2: I like a number of years ago we were like,
Speaker 2: you know, we both want to be writing stand up
Speaker 2: differently than we are, and we so we're like, let's
Speaker 2: do a meet up and like work like go over
Speaker 2: jokes together like in person, you know, because sometimes when
Speaker 2: you talk your jokes out it it impacts your writing.
Speaker 2: And that was a few years ago and we haven't
Speaker 2: spoken since. Literally both of us were like that. Yet
Speaker 2: now our friendship events because we decided to do that.
Speaker 2: I haven't seen I mean, we have actually spoken, but like, yeah,
Speaker 2: it's always like fuck, I miss you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I haven't seen Sean for a long time.
Speaker 2: Years have gone by.
Speaker 1: I haven't seen that anyone.
Speaker 4: No one, ye just text a person casually and then
Speaker 4: not talk about the writing you're not doing.
Speaker 2: I mean we we abandoned that long ago. I still
Speaker 2: want to do it. It is a good idea. It's
Speaker 2: I love, you know, I love other people's brains and
Speaker 2: talking and it always devolves into talking about like stand
Speaker 2: up theory, which is my favorite thing to do anyway.
Speaker 2: So sure, yeah, and the whole meals are right off.
Speaker 2: This was a business Goulle sing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you got to write with your friends just for
Speaker 3: tax purposes alone.
Speaker 2: But my speaking on podcasts, my friend Heather do it.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure we least one of you knows her.
Speaker 2: She's she ran a show, uh for a while, and
Speaker 2: she's just like she has this really specific sense of
Speaker 2: humor that I love, and she started a podcast that
Speaker 2: is her it's a Patreon podcast and she does it
Speaker 2: in her home with a soundboard, and like it's very
Speaker 2: just her, and you know, the levels are all off,
Speaker 2: and it's like it's like a it's like a zene,
Speaker 2: it's like a Riot Girl zine. Yeah, you know, it's
Speaker 2: like a level of unhinged and just like talking about her,
Speaker 2: her sense of humor so specific. But it's just such
Speaker 2: a wonderful format and it makes me crazy, Like I'm
Speaker 2: like I have to do this now, and I feel
Speaker 2: weird because I'm like, well, she's doing it, but like
Speaker 2: you can't really have a monopoly on just doing a
Speaker 2: podcast by yourself. I've always loved personally the podcasts which
Speaker 2: are just one person talking yeah themselves.
Speaker 4: You know, you know, you know who has a great
Speaker 4: one is? Do you know Chase Bernstein?
Speaker 2: Oh, Chase has one.
Speaker 4: It's called Composed and it's her. It is one of
Speaker 4: the funniest things. Oh my god, see it is. She
Speaker 4: She starts everyone with writing a letter to the thing
Speaker 4: she's going to talk about, and the one she did
Speaker 4: on wordle so you hear like the sound effect of
Speaker 4: typing in the background, and she's like, dear wordle, wordle.
Speaker 4: I start that line alone. I like was laughing out
Speaker 4: loud in my house. She's so funny and like there's
Speaker 4: been times where Chris and I like, I went to
Speaker 4: pick him up at the airport, so I had to
Speaker 4: start the podcast in the car before he got in,
Speaker 4: and talking for two minutes by myself made me feel
Speaker 4: like I went insane, Like total is one of the
Speaker 4: worst feelings I've ever had, where I'm like, I'm not
Speaker 4: funny and I should not be doing this for sure.
Speaker 4: By the time he got into the car, It's really right.
Speaker 4: It's so crazy making I really want to do it.
Speaker 4: Heather can do it, and that Chase can do it.
Speaker 2: I love it. And Sarah, Yeah, I was talking to you,
Speaker 2: Chris about this Sarah Shaeffer's podcast. I think she's doing
Speaker 2: it with Caitlyn Jenner, No, Caitlyn gil And like the
Speaker 2: hard thing for me about that is that, like, I
Speaker 2: love Caitlyn gil separately also so much, and I'm like,
Speaker 2: but I don't love hearing two women that I love
Speaker 2: together because I feel jealous that.
Speaker 1: I'm not You're left out.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I want to be there with my friends. Anyway.
Speaker 1: It's just something.
Speaker 2: About a woman alone talking it is like it's just
Speaker 2: so weird and intimate and just like there's something fuck
Speaker 2: up going on and everybody's brain and I just fucking
Speaker 2: it's so I'm I'm like, I'm working on a script
Speaker 2: right now and I'm I'm on my last It's obviously terrible,
Speaker 2: and I'm fucking like gonna die when I finish it,
Speaker 2: and I'm gonna send it out and everybody's gonna be like,
Speaker 2: you should quit comedy, and I'm gonna definitely, so I
Speaker 2: have to finish that. And then the next thing I'm
Speaker 2: gonna do is this podcast really quick? Can you tell
Speaker 2: us the name of Heather Jewett's podcast, you know?
Speaker 4: And I can.
Speaker 2: It's called Bimbo Summit, And she's got a free one
Speaker 2: on her Patreon that you can listen to called Addressing
Speaker 2: the Allegations, which is about my old next door neighbor.
Speaker 2: She moved into my apartment and she lives down like
Speaker 2: it's a downstairs from an upstairs apartment where there is
Speaker 2: and just I won't spoil it too much for you,
Speaker 2: an unhinged situation and she's downstairs and her take on
Speaker 2: it is so special, and just it fills me with
Speaker 2: guilt because I put her in this situation, but it
Speaker 2: wasn't as crazy when I was there, I swear to God,
Speaker 2: and it's a great apartment. But she's, yeah, so you
Speaker 2: got it, you gotta check it out. Okay, great, I
Speaker 2: love that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're right, Karen, that I did. I don't know
Speaker 3: where the pressure was coming, didn't. We used to do
Speaker 3: this episode every month, Yes, were there? Okay, a whole
Speaker 3: month had gone by, and I guess you weren't in town.
Speaker 3: I did one and by myself, just to fill a gap,
Speaker 3: and I yes, at the end, I felt like I
Speaker 3: had gone crazy. But now we've gone through a whole
Speaker 3: pandemic of talking to ourselves and having conversations with plants,
Speaker 3: so maybe it wouldn't be as crazy causing, right.
Speaker 4: I think that you have to be the kind of
Speaker 4: person that would pre write what that say, fifty minutes
Speaker 4: might look like, right, which I will never do. I
Speaker 4: will never do.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: So if it was my thing, which I knew when
Speaker 4: I was going to pick you up, it was going
Speaker 4: to be my thing, and I couldn't take three seconds
Speaker 4: to pre decide just to bullet points. Don't just do
Speaker 4: this off the top of your head. You won't like
Speaker 4: it and you will have nowhere to go and nowhere
Speaker 4: to land. But I was like, no, watch this, I'm
Speaker 4: going to improvise this whole thing, a thing I definitely
Speaker 4: can't do and don't like doing it.
Speaker 2: There's something about like the brain under pressure that is
Speaker 2: so fascinating to me that like I can, like if
Speaker 2: I have a really big stand up set coming up,
Speaker 2: like I can memorize the whole set, like word for word,
Speaker 2: and I cannot remember it when I'm in that space
Speaker 2: of like being because it feels like you're being assaulted
Speaker 2: with like the pressure is like whatever it is makes
Speaker 2: my brain unable to think of the next thing. So
Speaker 2: I always take my notebook on stage no matter what,
Speaker 2: because I'm just like, yes, I know the jokes, but
Speaker 2: like I have to see the word and I just
Speaker 2: can't do it otherwise I have no photographic memory. And
Speaker 2: it's the same when you're talking by yourself a little
Speaker 2: bit like, oh, there's this pressure coming from somewhere where
Speaker 2: you could just raise it.
Speaker 4: I think it's the silence, Like I think in the immediacy,
Speaker 4: like when you're doing stand up, at least there's somebody
Speaker 4: somewhere giggling or supporting, But when you're talking into a
Speaker 4: microphone like this and there's no one else, and then
Speaker 4: you're just like, oh, of course this isn't good.
Speaker 1: Oh.
Speaker 4: I mean, I think it's reflective of like my mind state,
Speaker 4: which is deeply negative.
Speaker 2: And it's funny to be also a comedian because we're
Speaker 2: just like people that but probably all of us in
Speaker 2: our lives. When we have a phone conversation with somebody
Speaker 2: who's not a comedian, or just a regular non phone
Speaker 2: conversation like we're just doing all the time, that person
Speaker 2: is not kidding word in edgewise.
Speaker 1: Why why is.
Speaker 2: It weird to do by suddenly a problem now exactly
Speaker 2: like our brother in law says four times.
Speaker 1: Suddenly it's like that's my time, goodbye, Hey, hang.
Speaker 2: This has been the kitchen. It's been real.
Speaker 1: Every conversation that's.
Speaker 2: I also think I have.
Speaker 4: I know for a fact I have defiance disorder. So
Speaker 4: so it's almost like, if this is the thing I
Speaker 4: don't post, if this is the thing I'm supposed to
Speaker 4: be doing, then I.
Speaker 2: Will figure out a way to fuck that up. Is
Speaker 2: that really a thing? Yeah, defiance disorder? Yes, it is
Speaker 2: writing that down.
Speaker 4: Because it's a thing where you just can't have people
Speaker 4: tell you what to do because you can't, you then
Speaker 4: won't be able to do it. Okay, So okay, So
Speaker 4: I'm sure there's a more, much more like alcoholics by
Speaker 4: the book.
Speaker 1: Yeah, in the Big.
Speaker 2: Book in AA there's like this incredible passage that really
Speaker 2: actually might be in the twelve and twelve. It's my
Speaker 2: favorite line in all of the literature, which is when
Speaker 2: we boil it and it's like some symptoms of alcoholism
Speaker 2: and like alcoholic thinking is like the words are genuine
Speaker 2: alarm at the prospect of work.
Speaker 1: Yeah, genuine alarm. That is amazing.
Speaker 2: I love genuine alarm because I really described and it's
Speaker 2: just it's not like oh no, it's not even like shoot,
Speaker 2: it's like literally I got to get out of here.
Speaker 1: Your hair stands up. Ye, you're hired. Yikes.
Speaker 2: I used to call in.
Speaker 4: There was a job I had in Sacerbaa, one of
Speaker 4: the first real jobs I ever had, and it was
Speaker 4: just like a coffee place, and the girl that worked
Speaker 4: before me hated me so much because every day she
Speaker 4: worked from like six in the morning until three o'clock
Speaker 4: in the afternoon, and I was supposed to take over
Speaker 4: from three on, but every single time, every day I
Speaker 4: would call up with a different excuse of why I
Speaker 4: was late, and she hated me. And there was one
Speaker 4: time where I got there and she was like, I
Speaker 4: had a plan to go on a bike ride with
Speaker 4: my boyfriend and you ruined it. And she walked out
Speaker 4: and I was just like standing there, like you fucking dork.
Speaker 4: Like I didn't feel guilty. It was that kind of
Speaker 4: thing of like I can't if I'm supposed to be
Speaker 4: here at three, I will be here at three twelve
Speaker 4: if not three twenty, and you are supposed to deal
Speaker 4: with it, and I don't have to deal with it.
Speaker 2: That truly us my attitude, yes, yes, for years, like
Speaker 2: why would you plan around a thing that you decided
Speaker 2: should be the thing? And then told me about, all right,
Speaker 2: you're going to rely on me because of your bike boyfriend.
Speaker 3: You have to go on some weird couple's Kermit and
Speaker 3: Miss Piggy bike ride.
Speaker 2: Sorry, I ruined your Muppet Show dream.
Speaker 1: I didn't mean to.
Speaker 2: And your feet even touch the pedals. What's happening down?
Speaker 3: I just remembers the whole theater gasping because it was
Speaker 3: the first time we saw Kermit's legs.
Speaker 2: Oh, those gorgeous legs. Oh, somebody, somebody, climaxes. Finally there's
Speaker 2: the legs.
Speaker 4: There, it is there, they are.
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for talking to us today. I
Speaker 2: love both of you all so much. I think you're
Speaker 2: so funny and good people, but mostly funny, which is
Speaker 2: what we really care about about this stuff.
Speaker 1: The whole time. It was really good to tell you
Speaker 1: to thank you.
Speaker 2: It was awesome. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: Comedy I loved You've been listening to Do You Need
Speaker 1: a Ride? D y n n R. This has been
Speaker 1: an exactly right production.
Speaker 2: Produced by Casey O'Brien.
Speaker 3: Mixed by John Bradley, artwork by Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 1: Theme song by Karen Kilgarriff.
Speaker 4: Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at dinar
Speaker 4: podcast That's d y n ar Podcast.
Speaker 3: For more information, go to exactly Rightmedia dot com.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Oh You're welcome, Hong Kong