Speaker 1: Welcome to Carefully Reckless, the production of Our Heart Radio
Speaker 1: and the Black Effect. Nice as nice, little aspect, I
Speaker 1: still aspect, nice still as still still, And just like that,
Speaker 1: we're back on the air. Welcome back to another carefully
Speaker 1: Reckless episode with your girl just hilarious. And I got
Speaker 1: little baby father with me today. This is his first
Speaker 1: time doing yeoh, this is your first time doing the
Speaker 1: actual podcast, ain't it. Yeah, you've never been on audio.
Speaker 1: Your son made its call reckless before years. No, Yo,
Speaker 1: it's low as to be trying to really really boss
Speaker 1: up on me. He'd be trying to crack on me
Speaker 1: and everything. You think, your little comedian when you get
Speaker 1: in here. Um, the topic that I wanted to discuss
Speaker 1: um A lot of people always asks. They always ask
Speaker 1: about like how you and I got to this point,
Speaker 1: you know, where we can co parent healthy and like
Speaker 1: in a healthy way, and how we have made this um,
Speaker 1: this this great environment for ourselves and our child. Like
Speaker 1: we were like, we're definitely like a happy family, but
Speaker 1: like we it's like, man, you are siblings and people
Speaker 1: don't even they don't get it. They love it, but
Speaker 1: they don't get it. So I want to talk about
Speaker 1: that like because it took a long time for us
Speaker 1: to get here, but we did. We did get it,
Speaker 1: And I don't think it took a long time. I
Speaker 1: just think it took some time. It's took a lot
Speaker 1: of work too, it took a lot. I wouldn't even
Speaker 1: say it work. It just it was pride. I think
Speaker 1: it was a lot of pride in the way like
Speaker 1: you know, we was, we was young, We was coming
Speaker 1: from two different backgrounds, and for the longest I really
Speaker 1: couldn't understand you, like why you did the things you
Speaker 1: did when you came from a two prime household, and
Speaker 1: you know, as as I grew and you know, learn
Speaker 1: to get out my feelings with dealing with you, I
Speaker 1: took a step back and I said, well, damn, let
Speaker 1: me try to understand it. Which I can't get you
Speaker 1: personally into that or far as me at Ashton, it
Speaker 1: was like it was easy for us to just separate
Speaker 1: and go out ways because we had your number one
Speaker 1: lady in the middle, your mom, My mom. She took
Speaker 1: it was so much easy. Ways though you'd be like, all, well,
Speaker 1: fuck you, bitch, or whatever the case. Maybe I never
Speaker 1: was really that disrespectful then, so I wouldn't really say that,
Speaker 1: but you never you never really did. You didn't talk
Speaker 1: to me like I talked to you the correct and
Speaker 1: you know, like I said even then, like I'm like, damn,
Speaker 1: why is she talking to me like that? Like he's like,
Speaker 1: you know, like I was a little I don't even timid,
Speaker 1: but just like still really emotional. But definitely I think, mom,
Speaker 1: your mom, Mom arrived and you know, shout out to her.
Speaker 1: Always give her flowers. Why I always give up flowers,
Speaker 1: But I believe that her being your mom and a
Speaker 1: daycare provider really helped us a lot as well. So
Speaker 1: of course I didn't have to see you. I would
Speaker 1: pick him up on a Friday, drop him off Monday
Speaker 1: to daycare, go to school, and you will get a
Speaker 1: Monday through Thursday, which in the normal world for moms
Speaker 1: that have, you know, custody of their children, that is
Speaker 1: normal for the dad to do. Yeah, it is not
Speaker 1: a problem. You're not a dad beat dad because you
Speaker 1: get your child through Monday. I mean primarily a kid.
Speaker 1: You know, a kid lives with their moms, so you know,
Speaker 1: primarily in some cases, you know, because nowadays, you know,
Speaker 1: there are a lot of single dads too, and you know,
Speaker 1: and and they get like they had their children from
Speaker 1: sun up the sunday. You know, they have to they
Speaker 1: have to be basically the mother and the dad, you know.
Speaker 1: And I give those dads their flowers as well, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. So I'm not gonna always um
Speaker 1: only give the moms a single mom life. You know,
Speaker 1: some light, No, definitely, but that's WHI always take the
Speaker 1: credit for, granted with me and you And wait, what
Speaker 1: was you saying? Because you said you couldn't understand why
Speaker 1: I would do the things I did? What the hell
Speaker 1: was not doing that was so necessarily you was doing
Speaker 1: bad thing? It was the way you like just like
Speaker 1: nobody really seen that side of you, like the party side,
Speaker 1: the wild side, like for a long time. We're gonna
Speaker 1: put it on here. For a long time. It was,
Speaker 1: oh that's wrong, baby mother. I know I've said that,
Speaker 1: but a lot of doing before I was, before Jessillaris
Speaker 1: was even thought of. I was just wrong, baby mother. Nobody. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we will take it because of you. We're gonna take
Speaker 1: it back before Ashton. We're gonna play it like that.
Speaker 1: We're gonna take it back before Ashton before that, you know,
Speaker 1: it was that was wrong, baby mother. Everybody was trying
Speaker 1: to figure out who Jess was. You know, Facebook was popping,
Speaker 1: and then she had the ball blonde head head we
Speaker 1: played the kan Yeah yeah, Ama Rose things. So you know,
Speaker 1: like then I started going parties. Well, um, a couple
Speaker 1: of friends of mine from school and um, a couple
Speaker 1: of parties. I'm gonna put you on the flying you
Speaker 1: know now people seeing you. Now you're going out more
Speaker 1: because for a long time, like I said, you in
Speaker 1: school white people, so like you've really never really I
Speaker 1: never really seen a party side until after that, like
Speaker 1: after that fact, so right after that part, but it
Speaker 1: was like why the fund this girl always got a party,
Speaker 1: Like why is she not family going to like your
Speaker 1: mom my dad still together? You know, they got two houses,
Speaker 1: like that's the life. Like I was like that. I
Speaker 1: was like, that's all right. So when you grow up
Speaker 1: like that, you know what I'm saying, Like my mom
Speaker 1: didn't let me go off. My mom didn't like it was.
Speaker 1: I was just doing everything that I wasn't allowed to
Speaker 1: do when I was younger. My mom didn't like me
Speaker 1: hanging with fast tail girls like fast ass girls, and
Speaker 1: and she did Yeah you know, I was definitely sheltered,
Speaker 1: you know, And it wasn't like I thank her for
Speaker 1: that now, you know. But that's why I always I
Speaker 1: started sneaking out and I started stealing our car coming
Speaker 1: to Baltomore because you know, I went, like I sent
Speaker 1: to an all white high school in Pennsylvania. So I started.
Speaker 1: I got into two drugs and Ship, I got into
Speaker 1: all that. When I started drinking up there with them
Speaker 1: goddamn white kids. I'm like, oh, Ship, all right, you
Speaker 1: working all the way in Baltomore, Mom, Ship, I'm about
Speaker 1: to start sucking up out here, you know. And when
Speaker 1: I got back to Baltomore, that's when I met you
Speaker 1: after my high school year is and I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: all right, so now I can party in Baltimore, like now,
Speaker 1: you know. So that's what it was. I was just
Speaker 1: trying to I guess, you know, get my years back
Speaker 1: that I spent bench you know, not able to do that, Ship, okay.
Speaker 1: And then yeah, like I think that that was that time.
Speaker 1: And then it was a situation. You got into this
Speaker 1: when I really liked, knew that I was in love
Speaker 1: with you, because when you came to me, I really
Speaker 1: could I really wasn't you know, what's the way do you?
Speaker 1: I can use not emotional. I really wasn't sympathy sympathetic.
Speaker 1: I really wasn't like, oh, well she coming to me
Speaker 1: like whatever, I don't believe I really believe you. But
Speaker 1: about you know with the John concil block, the model. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so you know, like when you know, we sat in
Speaker 1: the court room and you know you at this point,
Speaker 1: at this time, you're pregnant, so like you know, you're
Speaker 1: showing a little bit. So when you were set in
Speaker 1: the court room and um, all I heard was Tom,
Speaker 1: I ain't hid is a suspension the weekend ship and
Speaker 1: none of that ship. So like you know, at the
Speaker 1: sentence was over, I was all right, well she got
Speaker 1: go on weekends. So this one, you know, it got
Speaker 1: a little good for me because I'm like, oh, she
Speaker 1: going to jail on the weekends. I had a call,
Speaker 1: so I was going to jail, and all you was
Speaker 1: worried about was the bitches you was going to see
Speaker 1: while I was jail on the weekend, because she was
Speaker 1: gonna hand in my car. No, it wasn't necessary that
Speaker 1: it was because I was always scared to drive outside
Speaker 1: of the neighborhood. I adn't really get that until you know, man,
Speaker 1: you started driving back and forth the p A. You
Speaker 1: don't let me drive. Mind, I still only had a college.
Speaker 1: I didn't have a birth to you at that time,
Speaker 1: but I was yeah, didn't so until late. But remember
Speaker 1: I used to work with the car washing the part
Speaker 1: of car and current cleaning. Real good for the gentleman ties. Stay.
Speaker 1: But I think that man, you gained such a great
Speaker 1: bomb because you was dead when I got all of
Speaker 1: those things, birth certificate, my my permit, my license, and
Speaker 1: we found out the real spelling US spelling to my name.
Speaker 1: And I had to go do so much things and
Speaker 1: it is getting me changed. And this is me by
Speaker 1: myself doing it. Like like I said, Man, you know,
Speaker 1: I love my dad to death, but my dad didn't
Speaker 1: really do he was supposed to do. And my my mom,
Speaker 1: my stepmom, my stepmo was really just a provider. My
Speaker 1: stepmom really wasn't a lover. Like she didn't know how
Speaker 1: to kiss you. Yeah, yeah, it was never I love you.
Speaker 1: It was never man, let me hold you. It wasn't.
Speaker 1: But she made you know, she cooked the lot she
Speaker 1: supposed to do. And you know me, I wanted that
Speaker 1: because I had lost my mom. So now so now
Speaker 1: I'm an adult in the dating world, obvious, really don't
Speaker 1: know how to date a woman, right, okay, but you
Speaker 1: know what takes up. It takes like a lot of
Speaker 1: balls to even say that that's really good that you
Speaker 1: know that. Yeah, my dad made it cool, like yo,
Speaker 1: all right, even my right mind. You know, like I said,
Speaker 1: he a shame this game. We had this conversation a lot. Now.
Speaker 1: My dad made it cool that it was cool to
Speaker 1: just fun different women. It wasn't cool too, I know,
Speaker 1: I didn't want to disrespect a woman like there, but
Speaker 1: he my dad made it like it was just cool
Speaker 1: to date the multiple women. It was like, you know,
Speaker 1: at eighteen nineteen, my dad like, oh boy, I'm shortly marvel,
Speaker 1: like I need you had a niece or a sister.
Speaker 1: Oh oh, I got you, especially when I got a
Speaker 1: little older. You know, let's go back to you know me,
Speaker 1: and you're like, we're gonna fast forward a little bit
Speaker 1: till now acton like one or two for a long time.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say, like seven months, we ain't. We didn't.
Speaker 1: We don't communicate. We didn't. Yeah, we didn't communicate at all.
Speaker 1: It was very rare. It was always arguing, like you know,
Speaker 1: and that that was around the time where you know,
Speaker 1: you bust my window out the car, you know that
Speaker 1: jazz and selling and ship Yeah, yeah, you know, that
Speaker 1: was around that time. But um, after think that was
Speaker 1: the only problem. After that, you know, I ain't talked
Speaker 1: to you again. I just your mom let me know
Speaker 1: that you was home. Uh we went on, man, I
Speaker 1: created my schedule then't I think the comedian stuff started
Speaker 1: probably like a year or two after that. I want
Speaker 1: to say it started around when Ashton started. Two years
Speaker 1: after that day, so acting three now it's two, it's
Speaker 1: two thousand. You know, I catched me, I catched allege that.
Speaker 1: Um but by then, you know, I had just brought
Speaker 1: a cough for my twenty second birthday with working money,
Speaker 1: you know, I catched the check. I'm still going to school,
Speaker 1: so everything is opening up for me. But you know you,
Speaker 1: on the other hand, you're still trying to make it.
Speaker 1: And one thing I can say, we never could be
Speaker 1: struggling like a motherfucker's we never could be up at
Speaker 1: the same time. So like here, I catched the check,
Speaker 1: you know me, you know me, I'm just so happy
Speaker 1: I'm younger. Even all this money, I can finally do
Speaker 1: what I want to do. Now Ship, I could date
Speaker 1: the chicks that I wanted to date now, like a
Speaker 1: whole lot. When when I say that, I'd be like,
Speaker 1: you know how, you know why, I wasn't enough? No body,
Speaker 1: you're gone, but no ship. No, by then I'm two
Speaker 1: when he was broken. No, that's not you're gone already.
Speaker 1: You know already. Basically you're already gone for me, like
Speaker 1: you probably had like three or four boyfriends. Matter of fact,
Speaker 1: remember the first birthday you had a boyfriend as your
Speaker 1: first birthday, when he first known how to walk, he
Speaker 1: had a little push of turtle, you know. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: by then, like even then we was we wasn't and
Speaker 1: yeah we weren't buddy buddy then, but we was cool.
Speaker 1: Yeah we were we were Okay, it wasn't too the
Speaker 1: second year when I'm like, all right, you know what,
Speaker 1: I ain't wonder about what she's doing no more. I'm
Speaker 1: not about to let her keep getting me upset, and
Speaker 1: you know, whatever the case may be. Then act in
Speaker 1: turn three. All that ship happened. Now I'm doing good
Speaker 1: for myself. By then, you're doing what you're doing You
Speaker 1: got a boyfriend though, So even when the money and
Speaker 1: ship really started, when it started really really coming, when
Speaker 1: it really came, you know the most thing you asked.
Speaker 1: So I always loved you doing like and I never
Speaker 1: shared this story, but I'm a share today. When the
Speaker 1: money came, you never asked me for ship. You said, wrong,
Speaker 1: I don't want being mommy house no more. Now mind you,
Speaker 1: we haven't coming. We're communicating a little bit more. Way
Speaker 1: before it came, you don't even know it was coming
Speaker 1: fresh on. But I wanted that. I wanted telling you that,
Speaker 1: you know, I was get catching the cabs and shipped
Speaker 1: to the appointments. So then the only thing you said
Speaker 1: it was wrong. I just want you to help me move.
Speaker 1: I said, all right, good, findal apartment and I will
Speaker 1: pay for you. Never found the apartment. You went and
Speaker 1: got the house man. You got the house, and there
Speaker 1: was you and um, what's that guy named? You're on
Speaker 1: a J. And I'm like, I know this bitch ain't
Speaker 1: just telling me she wanted to move and move with
Speaker 1: the motherfucking nigga. But by then me and A J
Speaker 1: was click tight, like yeah, I like a J. That
Speaker 1: was my favorite man out of everybody you had, that
Speaker 1: was my favorite boyfriend you had. Man, we didn't had
Speaker 1: some of the best talks like that always. Man, we
Speaker 1: had we had a one on one talk you ain't
Speaker 1: even know about, and that's what we said about how different.
Speaker 1: And it wasn't necessarily did something to me. It was
Speaker 1: more so me being you know, the cocky person that
Speaker 1: I was, and I don't want you run my mother. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know so man Ajia had a great talk. Man
Speaker 1: one shout up to you boy make man, that's one
Speaker 1: that was one of my like my dogs. I don't
Speaker 1: know what happened to in whatever case may beat throughout
Speaker 1: he got locked up. Okay, you got locked Okay to
Speaker 1: see even after that, then when y'all get done, you
Speaker 1: know you got Chris that coming you are. I don't
Speaker 1: know what was up with you, but your ain't like
Speaker 1: me for some reason. So like by then, I'm still
Speaker 1: you know, I still got money, I'm still working my ass,
Speaker 1: so I'm still doing damn. But Chris didn't like me
Speaker 1: because we were really close, Me and you were close
Speaker 1: like that. So I'm trying to figure it out. So
Speaker 1: like it's times where I'd be shocking, I'd be like
Speaker 1: I know my being like this, and I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: I ain't get because I don't want cars, friction in
Speaker 1: the household anything because that you never have an But
Speaker 1: but it wasn't necessary. You never you know what you
Speaker 1: wasn't that type of woman. Yeah you didn't come from
Speaker 1: the household, but you would never even know because you're
Speaker 1: never trying to know. And I never tried because you
Speaker 1: had a boyfriend. I didn't want to overstep my boundaries.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to cause problems, and honestly I didn't
Speaker 1: because I used to ask actually like yo, like you
Speaker 1: think I should She like no, because that's phone cause
Speaker 1: you know, friction, I like whatever. So it was a
Speaker 1: little bit of times one time I told you no,
Speaker 1: but it was times before that You're actually like pay
Speaker 1: a little bill or something, and I do that like
Speaker 1: that was all you actually and literally and and if
Speaker 1: I was asking you that ship I need literally did
Speaker 1: like you know, I never asked exactly exactly I said,
Speaker 1: and like even even even to the point where you know,
Speaker 1: like I said, man, you know I got family used
Speaker 1: me and all that ship I used me, And I said,
Speaker 1: you're like my baby mother never tried to use me.
Speaker 1: Never never like, never tried to use me. And I
Speaker 1: really feel like even then, you was the only the
Speaker 1: only genuine, genuine baby child mom I had. You was
Speaker 1: the only probably true friend that I had where it
Speaker 1: was like, yo, this female never asked me for and
Speaker 1: honestly she was really entitled to it. I'm gonna saying
Speaker 1: titled because you was my child mom. So it was like, YO,
Speaker 1: you could have always called, oh, actually need this, actually
Speaker 1: need that, need this, but you never did that. You
Speaker 1: never did that, And um so I boomed fast forward
Speaker 1: by now ship got fucked up, running out one and
Speaker 1: low you on your peak. You know, you know you
Speaker 1: ride money running out you know. I got fired, and
Speaker 1: that's what really happened. I got fired. So now you
Speaker 1: know I stopped spending people like, oh he went broke.
Speaker 1: I ain't go broke. There, I humbled myself at little
Speaker 1: bit I did, I said, Joe, like the savings, I
Speaker 1: ain't you know, I don't think it was hopen. I
Speaker 1: ain don't know if. I ain't know how I scammed
Speaker 1: and I don't know how to do none of that.
Speaker 1: He was not security, that's all. I not security. I was.
Speaker 1: Now I'm a nursing support. So he fired me, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, damn, they will find me right right right
Speaker 1: right now. So I'm like, damn you. I can't spend
Speaker 1: no more because I don't know when the next time
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get a jaw. I went a whole six
Speaker 1: months without a jaw. It wasn't to my aunt, shearid.
Speaker 1: It was like go to such and such. You know
Speaker 1: that you know the manager and you know that the
Speaker 1: hr I'm like, real, I got my ship. I went
Speaker 1: up there and just six months later, so you know,
Speaker 1: I'm on my last and you know, I ain't gonna
Speaker 1: say who I went back to you at the moment,
Speaker 1: but you know, I wind up going back to my
Speaker 1: second child mom. And I did say it. No, I
Speaker 1: was gonna say no, I ain't gonna say I wind
Speaker 1: up going back. Yeah, I wind up going back to
Speaker 1: hub when things you know, but I didn't want to
Speaker 1: be with the when things right. It was just knowing.
Speaker 1: It was just at the moment, I can't say that, um,
Speaker 1: but by then you know you're reaching your peak and
Speaker 1: even doing that stage like now you're traveling. Now you're traveling.
Speaker 1: Don't want to answer my calls, you know, with Chris
Speaker 1: Chris Witch you endemic that created a jealous spot with
Speaker 1: me because I'm like, damg, she really don't answer my calls.
Speaker 1: She really ain't sucking with me. I say, way, we
Speaker 1: weren't even in a bad spot for it to be
Speaker 1: like this, so I'm not confused, but I'm already funk.
Speaker 1: I know you don't like me. You're in thelocal trust girl. Now, okay, cool,
Speaker 1: that went on like a year some change. It wasn't
Speaker 1: until you really up and just left your alone you
Speaker 1: got a relationship. I got everybody back like again, Like honestly,
Speaker 1: I don't know what the funk it was. It was
Speaker 1: just like he just had me isolated. It's fun from
Speaker 1: like I wasn't I wasn't even close with London when
Speaker 1: I was with him, Like I wasn't talking to Shana
Speaker 1: as much when I was with him. Like it was
Speaker 1: just like like I don't know why, Like it was
Speaker 1: like he had turned me against other. Well, and then
Speaker 1: this is the you know my closest people. And the
Speaker 1: thing is, you're not ever supposed to give somebody some
Speaker 1: power over that. I mean, give somebody some power like
Speaker 1: that over you, like you never post you. I don't
Speaker 1: know what it was what the hell it was. But
Speaker 1: Chris had a motherfucking hold on me, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. Like, the only person that I was even
Speaker 1: close to, like around with other than him was my son,
Speaker 1: Like that was it. Me and my mom, Like we
Speaker 1: we talked. I would never go around my family though,
Speaker 1: Like it was crazy. So I felt lonely, as fun
Speaker 1: to you, while I was with him. I'm like, damn,
Speaker 1: and I felt lonely because I had caught everybody off,
Speaker 1: you know, indirectly, and that ship like really fucked me
Speaker 1: up something like, y'all, I need to get away from
Speaker 1: this nigga for different reasons. Not only is he stealing
Speaker 1: stealing from me, Not only is he cheating on me.
Speaker 1: Not only is you know, is he not even good
Speaker 1: for my son? You know, he's also fucking just not
Speaker 1: good for me. Period. He's not a good person, you know.
Speaker 1: And so I I realized that. And it's like, you're
Speaker 1: never supposed to stay with somebody so long to where
Speaker 1: you start hating them. You gotta break that shut off,
Speaker 1: because um, you know, it's not good to hate someone.
Speaker 1: And then the thing is, I think we're both doing great,
Speaker 1: fucking great. I don't know exactly how he's gonna He
Speaker 1: has a beautiful baby. Um, I hear you know. Um,
Speaker 1: I think he's been blocked so long I can't even
Speaker 1: go to his page. So and I doubt that he
Speaker 1: comes to mind. I mean, I don't know, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, Like he has a beautiful child, and um,
Speaker 1: I've seen the baby. You know, other people screenshots people
Speaker 1: like oh, she had a baby, and they send it
Speaker 1: to me. Um, baby look just like him. I know
Speaker 1: he's in a relationship. Um he is top tier uber driver,
Speaker 1: Like he's like yeah, like he's doing exceptionally well, like okay,
Speaker 1: and I still wish him all the best, but they
Speaker 1: say even doing this, Bard is great, like everything is great.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, maybe that was the best thing for
Speaker 1: both of us. Like you gotta understand, there's no disrespect
Speaker 1: to anybody, but you blew overnight. It wasn't that long.
Speaker 1: And then so to take a young man from not
Speaker 1: saying nothing, but to take a young man on a
Speaker 1: fame fame part like from nobody know me to dang,
Speaker 1: I'm all over the world. You know I'm doing this,
Speaker 1: I'm doing that. And I was like, you know, it's
Speaker 1: crazy because for a long time, like and I can
Speaker 1: only imagine how you felt in my predicament. But I
Speaker 1: used to sit back like, damn you. I knew we
Speaker 1: probably wouldn't a relationship. But that supposed to have been
Speaker 1: me with her. Why because I felt as though I
Speaker 1: needed to be by you to protect you from certain ship.
Speaker 1: So you have said that UF felt as never ever
Speaker 1: told me I've always I felt like that, and I
Speaker 1: always I was dealing with it like I was dealing
Speaker 1: with it. Was though she used to dream me like
Speaker 1: during that stage I was going through other ship. Now
Speaker 1: that's when I started drinking a lot, because like now
Speaker 1: people know who you are, but people know that you
Speaker 1: was my Now if you really didn't know, you didn't know,
Speaker 1: but people knew that she was my child mom. And
Speaker 1: I used to always grot fake pages used even in public,
Speaker 1: like damn she made it and she left you or
Speaker 1: she made then she don't do ship full you high
Speaker 1: fielding and nothing. It should be so much. And I
Speaker 1: used to have a cane to you why because first
Speaker 1: and foremost I know how that is. Like when you're
Speaker 1: in a certain predicament, you have a certain type of money,
Speaker 1: like you have a certain type of stature like it's
Speaker 1: hard and it's stressful because there was more money comes,
Speaker 1: more bills and more problems and more expensive by entitled
Speaker 1: yeah what I said, you know what, yo, I think
Speaker 1: the bar we created right now to this day and
Speaker 1: today is January twelve, and I just sat back. I
Speaker 1: sat back and I said, you know why, in due time,
Speaker 1: I honestly believe that me and How will have the
Speaker 1: calderness co parenting. You're always making up some band words
Speaker 1: cos I like it, man, how it will be calls
Speaker 1: you for our sons soon. It wasn't about nothing. It
Speaker 1: wasn't out just the MESSI was. It wasn't about none
Speaker 1: of that like it was. People always like, oh, she
Speaker 1: fund said, well, that's just our natural personalities. I've never
Speaker 1: even said you. I just said our because when we're
Speaker 1: in the we're in the same setting like it's nothing.
Speaker 1: But always after the emotions and ship went away from
Speaker 1: the baby mama baby father drama, it was always a vibe.
Speaker 1: It was always catchy. We always have fun. So I
Speaker 1: just together and how much like yo, like, all right, okay,
Speaker 1: it had come a time where me and Hug can
Speaker 1: be you know close. I always wanted that though because
Speaker 1: I was like yo, like I used to see people cooked,
Speaker 1: like older guys close with their children, mom and stuff
Speaker 1: with them, Like damn, I wish we can do that
Speaker 1: and don't have to be together. So I was never
Speaker 1: the ones who oh my baby, man that bitch. No,
Speaker 1: I wanted to coordinates while because I've seen from other
Speaker 1: situations that it was healthy for the child. Hold up,
Speaker 1: hold up, I know the ship getting good. But listen
Speaker 1: to just a couple of seconds of a commercial. If
Speaker 1: you love me, you'll listen. I've never, honestly, I've never
Speaker 1: seen uh bond like ours. Like I've never seen a
Speaker 1: co parenting team like us. I don't know one couple well,
Speaker 1: one x couple two parents that are not together and
Speaker 1: gel well and it can actually work together and not
Speaker 1: have to like force it like in front of their child,
Speaker 1: you know, but they really hate each other. I've never
Speaker 1: I've seen that this function. I've never seen like how
Speaker 1: we are. And a lot of people love that ship,
Speaker 1: you know, yeah, a lot of people a lot of
Speaker 1: people about us. A lot of people love it. But us,
Speaker 1: granted we ain't perfect, you know, like we be. If
Speaker 1: we argue, we may not speak. We talked about each other.
Speaker 1: We do all of that for the for the net sayers,
Speaker 1: and for the haters who won'ta say oh they phony.
Speaker 1: They just say that it ain't nothing other, it ain't nothing,
Speaker 1: never phony. It's just we at the end of the
Speaker 1: day heard being missing Llarius and me being a regular person.
Speaker 1: I am. We still are Ashton's parents. We're still going
Speaker 1: to go through that. You know, you're gonna you'ren You're
Speaker 1: gonna hear everything. Man, You're gonna it's gonna be a
Speaker 1: lot of haters and say, oh, I don't like they.
Speaker 1: I swear you're gonna head after this come out. You're
Speaker 1: gonna head. But fuck them. It's gonna be people around me.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be it's gonna be close and media people
Speaker 1: that said fuck them. You know for a long time,
Speaker 1: and I said, man, I appreciate that we can have
Speaker 1: this bond. Also more appreciate you know the position that
Speaker 1: you know, you allow me to be put in, even
Speaker 1: you know, being beside beside you of it than your
Speaker 1: child's that you know, your business partner, even for your
Speaker 1: moral support and ship like that. You know, it's so
Speaker 1: much stuff like sometimes you get on my fucking nerves
Speaker 1: because I'll be the old day like the funk, like
Speaker 1: why would she say this? Why would she say that?
Speaker 1: But I'm like, you know what, that's her right, Like
Speaker 1: even with carefully reckless live discussion. Yo, I'm going through
Speaker 1: you know, the comments of course on YouTube, and we
Speaker 1: got so many fucking dudes. I'm so excited, like you know,
Speaker 1: and one actually drops tonight seven pm. So make sure
Speaker 1: you're doing to that. That's the episode two. And this
Speaker 1: one is it's even steamier than the first one. Um,
Speaker 1: and my mic ain't for cannot no, no, you know
Speaker 1: you your Mike ain't gonna suck up this one on
Speaker 1: this one. But I noticed, like in the comments, people
Speaker 1: will say, oh, just still want him more, he know,
Speaker 1: he's still in love with her, or he want her
Speaker 1: back boy and she want him back. Clear that shut up.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's self explanatory. Man. You don't have to
Speaker 1: want somebody back, Like I had a conversation with my
Speaker 1: homeboy the other day and I don't want to. But
Speaker 1: they never hear you say it. I'm speaking to the audience,
Speaker 1: I'm speaking to everybody who said but I'm speaking to her.
Speaker 1: I'm speaking to the artist and speaking to everybody who said,
Speaker 1: but I'm also speaking to my motherfucking bro. Mr Kara,
Speaker 1: this is the cleared up to you. This is to
Speaker 1: clear up to a Yeah, that's my that's my brother
Speaker 1: and his wedding. I do not want my child mama.
Speaker 1: It's no attraction there. She's a beautiful woman, yes she is.
Speaker 1: Do I love her? Yes? I do. I love as
Speaker 1: my child mom, my friend. You know things that my
Speaker 1: brother and my sister, however you want to put it
Speaker 1: things in that nature, Like like I was telling my
Speaker 1: my bro, I said, Bro, my child mom can walk
Speaker 1: in front of me naked, and I don't give a
Speaker 1: fuck literally, like yo, go put some fucking clothes on,
Speaker 1: Like what are you doing? Like it's been times where
Speaker 1: I didn't walk in the garage, through the garage coming
Speaker 1: to the house and you know, just to pick my
Speaker 1: son up. But like people will be like, oh yo,
Speaker 1: lie yo, brono, I don't have to fucking lie, bro,
Speaker 1: Like I ain't never had a a problem and getting
Speaker 1: a woman or you know, getting asked like that moment.
Speaker 1: I didn't that. It ain't too many I haven't touched.
Speaker 1: But it's like niggas think that you gotta be sucking
Speaker 1: your baby mother because she and I asked them whole
Speaker 1: I'm gonna take that back, I asked him. I said,
Speaker 1: is it because she's just the largest? Why I should
Speaker 1: try to get back with her? Nobody wants to give
Speaker 1: me a real answer, though, but I know that's what
Speaker 1: it is, because if you wasn't they with me saying
Speaker 1: I would bro go back to your first billy mother,
Speaker 1: because you ain't staying go back to your second? Yeah,
Speaker 1: y ain't saying go back to your third was never existed.
Speaker 1: But so why does it go back to my first one?
Speaker 1: I'm already on my fourth one? Why why is it?
Speaker 1: You know? So I'll be trying to I'll be really
Speaker 1: wanting to know the answer, like yo, like come on,
Speaker 1: Like is it because you had a couple of dollars
Speaker 1: that ain't never move me? So you know, no, to
Speaker 1: the world man, to the public, to my peers, to
Speaker 1: my brothers, to my family, I do not want my
Speaker 1: child mom. It is nothing we're able to be in
Speaker 1: a room or setting an environment involved, like to know
Speaker 1: what's just to love us together? If you have a
Speaker 1: around us, you'd be like, damn, wow, I'm pretty sure
Speaker 1: something of her boyfriends can have a boyfriend. Now, I'm
Speaker 1: pretty sure you'll still be feeling a weird like, damn, no,
Speaker 1: this ship really really yeah, honestly, he has like no
Speaker 1: issue and you know, man got histories like literally, so
Speaker 1: I wouldn't think it would be Yeah, and then he
Speaker 1: and his son's mom are like, dangn like us. Ain't
Speaker 1: nobody like us, but they're definitely on the level where
Speaker 1: they can talk about their son and they you know,
Speaker 1: and probably even laugh and joke together. And like he's
Speaker 1: been around you know, our boy friends and ship and
Speaker 1: you know, and well he hasn't had a girlfriend since her,
Speaker 1: you know me, you know, yeah, like my boyfriend was
Speaker 1: single for eleven years. You know that was his last
Speaker 1: relationship and when he was in with his his son's mom.
Speaker 1: But you know that even that, like he just was
Speaker 1: like y'all loved the dynamic that you're on wrong man,
Speaker 1: Like I love that. I ain't nobody you. He did
Speaker 1: not love you on our first date, ruf Chris, but
Speaker 1: I was invited. I didn't say, come on us go
Speaker 1: you said, honestly, you tell him that, Oh well, I
Speaker 1: didn't know that I showed I was never gonna say
Speaker 1: I showed up. But even if you would have, but
Speaker 1: I still would have came because you are that person.
Speaker 1: But he would have known that because he listened to
Speaker 1: I did not know. I really thought. I really thought
Speaker 1: it was a huge planned it for us. I ain't
Speaker 1: even acting. We was talking and when y'all walking to
Speaker 1: it to the bathroom, I don't know if it was
Speaker 1: the Father's day thing. Yeah, so what I'm thinking, I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: you know me hard, I don't really do it. And
Speaker 1: I didn't think he was gonna come. That's why I
Speaker 1: was like, I don't think you were going to come
Speaker 1: because dad, I took my dad off for the first time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so I didn't and you had told me he was
Speaker 1: gonna spend, but my dad wanted to do he wanted
Speaker 1: to do, so if you didn't, you want to do that, right?
Speaker 1: Sounds like a yeah, you know. So I ain't able
Speaker 1: to eat too much because I knew what I had,
Speaker 1: what I wanted. But yeah, man, I think once the
Speaker 1: emotions and the feelings is gone, Yeah, and the pride
Speaker 1: and ship is a way I think that people can
Speaker 1: really find the good and that when you're not together,
Speaker 1: corning is great. Yeah. And then when you can actually
Speaker 1: put everything on the table and actually like tell me
Speaker 1: like why did you hurt me? Or Okay, this is
Speaker 1: what I did and it's no secrets. That's the thing.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Like even to this day, like you know,
Speaker 1: I go through hell and hot water, and it'd be
Speaker 1: like even with my second child, Mom, it's like I
Speaker 1: can't get on the same page right because she's worried
Speaker 1: about what I do too much, like it never you never,
Speaker 1: you never, but she says she is. You never call
Speaker 1: me and just make it about to live. It's always
Speaker 1: I'm about a bit you laid You want to be
Speaker 1: leave pressed to be laid up with a bit, but
Speaker 1: check you laid up how you laid up? But you
Speaker 1: gotta what I'm doing, yo, because I have I have
Speaker 1: a I have a two year old baby boy. She's
Speaker 1: still like yo, like come on, man, I got a
Speaker 1: five year old daughter. It's still and bound you granted
Speaker 1: even on the time of man Bryson Mom, like you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: I went back, you know, not really thinking Bryson Mom
Speaker 1: was gonna take me back. I went back. I did.
Speaker 1: I fucked up. But like for a person to say
Speaker 1: that they don't want a person and they moved on.
Speaker 1: I should not be going through what the funk I'm
Speaker 1: going through? I shouldn't you laid up? But check you're
Speaker 1: telling me, Oh, I'm pressed to lay up with a bit.
Speaker 1: You know everything I do? You worried about I switched
Speaker 1: my car as a problem. I moved out of the house. Oh,
Speaker 1: it's a problem. And this is we still talking about
Speaker 1: the second baby here I move out of the house.
Speaker 1: It's a problem. Oh why are you this? Why? Why
Speaker 1: are you worrying about me so much? Well? Why is
Speaker 1: that even a question? When you know why she write
Speaker 1: about it because it's a question, because why Then it
Speaker 1: becomes a power struggle where she want to control things.
Speaker 1: You want to go, what's my daughter? She want to
Speaker 1: go to the media and bash me about shaking things
Speaker 1: when yo, come on, yo, how long ago was that
Speaker 1: we still making things? Rather year like, come on man?
Speaker 1: Then everything everything? Every time I'm dealing with someone new
Speaker 1: player is always oh, you're just mad because I ain't
Speaker 1: want to funk with you. Yo, I've been accepted that.
Speaker 1: So now list six. Why can't you just be cause
Speaker 1: you yeah, you know, and it's not the download of
Speaker 1: death a character or to degrade, but yo, like at
Speaker 1: some point women gotta let that hurt go. But it's
Speaker 1: gonna take Yeah, it's gonna take a long long time
Speaker 1: because honestly, I'm gonna tell you why before we get
Speaker 1: up out of here. You you just admitted it and
Speaker 1: you didn't even know. Um you know, you you used her.
Speaker 1: You went back to a lot of times when it
Speaker 1: was convened from you. But that was pulling on her
Speaker 1: heart strings the whole time, you know what I'm saying, Like,
Speaker 1: so you made her feel like that. You gave her
Speaker 1: a lot of hope a lot of times like oh
Speaker 1: he might come back for good, to the point where
Speaker 1: even when she know you didn't mean it, she tricked
Speaker 1: herself into still like just holding onto that time, like believing.
Speaker 1: She tricked us out into believing you. You know what
Speaker 1: I mean. She just got used to being let down,
Speaker 1: so she heard out taken white here, you know. And
Speaker 1: then that's when she would say little things to to
Speaker 1: the latest baby mother like oh yeah this that neither.
Speaker 1: That's why she made it a point of running back
Speaker 1: every time, telling her oh, you know, yeah, Rome just
Speaker 1: left here, or Rome just asked me can he come
Speaker 1: to my house? Or he just wanted to do this,
Speaker 1: and one of and what it it wasn't working out
Speaker 1: with her. I'm really changing and really trying to be
Speaker 1: a better man, better that better everything, to be honest.
Speaker 1: But because you can't keep doing what you did in
Speaker 1: the passion, don't get nowhere. People never get nowhere. We're
Speaker 1: trying to go, but it's like it hurts so bad
Speaker 1: that I never can get through tour. Yeah, now you
Speaker 1: will be never could get through tour. Like it's always
Speaker 1: about what I'm doing. Yeah, when the last time we
Speaker 1: touched the Bryson to Brihanna was pregnant. Okay, so yes,
Speaker 1: so that was like that was still almost three. But
Speaker 1: that's different you're doing. That's different times because she ain't
Speaker 1: got you all the time. She ain't gonna be lonely
Speaker 1: while you ain't knowing you to come back. You're doing
Speaker 1: what you're doing. You got you having your fun, You're
Speaker 1: going on dates, you get and dressed, you going and
Speaker 1: then't look like fun. I don't you look like fun
Speaker 1: the time she worried about you, I don't. That's her
Speaker 1: problem now. But that's why. Actually the last time you
Speaker 1: touch it, because that's still recent to this, it's always
Speaker 1: or you broke this or you broke that. Oh you
Speaker 1: ain't got this or you ain't got that? How you this?
Speaker 1: How you that? That ship? Don't bother me? Man? What
Speaker 1: can we do to move forward on being better parents
Speaker 1: for my daughter? And it's and it will happened just
Speaker 1: as long as you stay stay out of her bed,
Speaker 1: you stay out of the house, you stay out of
Speaker 1: her face, and you and so that that she will
Speaker 1: have no other choice but to respect that ship. You literally,
Speaker 1: you know before we get out, you know that. I
Speaker 1: just have to clear it up because it's gonna be
Speaker 1: alive or a post or whatever the case, not even
Speaker 1: alive because she don't really do live. It's gonna be
Speaker 1: a post where trying to at me, manipulate me, deafromize
Speaker 1: my character and all of that when it ain't and
Speaker 1: I'm not responding to that. I'm not responding to it
Speaker 1: no more. Too mature, I've grown, I'm not. That's why
Speaker 1: I said, that's what I'm in big, like you're too
Speaker 1: big now for that ship, not even like status wise,
Speaker 1: I mean just like your mind is, you're on a
Speaker 1: different plateau like mentally, I can't be back and forth
Speaker 1: with no more man. But like I said, little all
Speaker 1: the people out there. That's how I mean jest, be
Speaker 1: you know, gain the relationship we have. We're not perfect, No,
Speaker 1: we definitely jailed a lot. I haven't seen a coprunching
Speaker 1: like us. Um to all you fellas, continue doing what
Speaker 1: you doing. Be great, you know, be consistent, Um, Always
Speaker 1: get your point across. You know, always try to be civilized.
Speaker 1: You know, you ain't gotta be right ry all the
Speaker 1: time to you women, same as you. You know, take
Speaker 1: your time, Try to let them emotions go. If you
Speaker 1: still have emotions there, don't be afraid to explain that.
Speaker 1: Maybe y'all can do better with him knowing you know,
Speaker 1: But don't try to make that man life miserable. Don't
Speaker 1: try to take from that man, especially when you know
Speaker 1: he may have other children or another family or trying
Speaker 1: to move for or even may want to be with you.
Speaker 1: Allow that man to grow. Help that man grow. You're
Speaker 1: losing too many fathers out here, Black fathers. That But
Speaker 1: it's me as a little baby father out of head,
Speaker 1: and I know for a fact it's gonna get there.
Speaker 1: It's gonna get there with your your other baby mothers
Speaker 1: and ship. But they ain't gonna never be like Justin Roman.
Speaker 1: On that note, I'm out of head carefully right. Lets
Speaker 1: make sure you you tune in each and every Wednesday
Speaker 1: hump Day, and now make sure you tune in at
Speaker 1: seven pm every Wednesday for the live discussion. Love y'all.
Speaker 1: Peace Carefully Reckless is a production of I Heart Radio
Speaker 1: and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from My heart Radio,
Speaker 1: visit the I heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever
Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows.