Speaker 1: I leave in I you wanta way back home? Either way,
Speaker 1: we want to be there.
Speaker 2: Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us
Speaker 2: time and a termino and gay.
Speaker 1: We want to send you off inside.
Speaker 2: We wanna welcome you back home.
Speaker 1: Tell us all about it. We scared? Or was it fine?
Speaker 3: Now?
Speaker 1: Porn?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do your need ride?
Speaker 4: Ride with Karen and Cris Welcome to Do you need ride?
Speaker 4: This is Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 1: This is Karen Kilgaraff.
Speaker 4: Happy twoy fifty eight, Everybody.
Speaker 1: Happy fifteen Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 4: This is our first podcast of the new year.
Speaker 1: God damn, it feels fresh.
Speaker 6: I know I'm kind of already just looking forward to
Speaker 6: twenty sixteen. Hey, I'm gonna give it a few more weeks.
Speaker 3: Why not look to the horizon if you can, you know,
Speaker 3: give it a chance, because sometimes it's like when you
Speaker 3: make pancakes.
Speaker 1: And the first one is all fucked up.
Speaker 3: Everybody expects January to like answer all their problems because
Speaker 3: it's a new year, but you gotta I don't know,
Speaker 3: it's bullshit.
Speaker 6: And plus I'm always trying to make those Mickey Mouse pancakes.
Speaker 1: You can't do a circle with two smaller circles.
Speaker 3: No, no, only the professional chefs.
Speaker 6: All of my expectations for this year should be standard
Speaker 6: pancake shaped.
Speaker 1: Just maybe crape.
Speaker 3: You can go slightly thinner, but don't try to do
Speaker 3: characters that are trademarked.
Speaker 6: The only thing that shooting your sites high does is
Speaker 6: it raises your expectations. So I'm going to lower my
Speaker 6: expectations and then they'll be fulfilled.
Speaker 1: And fill out your fulfillments.
Speaker 4: Yeah, let's not get all lofty in twenty fifty.
Speaker 1: Lofts just so sick of them.
Speaker 4: Just maintain. Yeah they're drafty.
Speaker 6: Yeah, they're usually not well insulated and you got to
Speaker 6: share a bathroom with someone.
Speaker 1: Yes, it's the furniture's really pointy.
Speaker 4: I hate loft.
Speaker 1: God, they're so lofty.
Speaker 6: Oh oh, it's good to see you again.
Speaker 3: I know I haven't seen you in so long. How
Speaker 3: is your Christmas vacation?
Speaker 4: My holiday vacation? Hey?
Speaker 1: Just oh sorry, I forgot that you were a Muslim jew?
Speaker 4: Is it filled with the only important thing Jesus Christ?
Speaker 4: So I had a good time. Let's see how I.
Speaker 1: Just negated you got your agenda going already.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it was fun, went home, played with nieces and
Speaker 6: also nephew.
Speaker 1: Montana or to your sisters.
Speaker 4: Both Montana and Spokane.
Speaker 1: What's your sister's name again?
Speaker 3: Lisa Fairbanks Rossy, Hi, Lisa Fairbanks my best friend.
Speaker 4: Yeah, she wants to be your best friend.
Speaker 1: She is my best friend.
Speaker 4: Oh wow, won't she be happy?
Speaker 1: And was it snowing in Montana?
Speaker 4: It was one degree?
Speaker 6: What just one of the degrees and then it starts
Speaker 6: snowing right when I left. So no, it was snowing.
Speaker 6: It was just too cold to use it for skating boarding.
Speaker 4: Skateboard?
Speaker 1: Do you skateboard sometimes?
Speaker 6: Yeah, a lot of people don't do it because, uh,
Speaker 6: the quote unquote doesn't exist yet.
Speaker 1: And it's so much like knee boarding.
Speaker 6: I just get a ski and narrow ski and I
Speaker 6: mounted as if it's a snowboard.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so it's a keyboard.
Speaker 6: And then I got a kneeboard, and then I bought
Speaker 6: a keyboard. Remember the first episode.
Speaker 1: That was eleven years ago.
Speaker 6: Oh, and there's many maclamoric Oh oh, driving by the
Speaker 6: Hollywood improv.
Speaker 1: Oh there's the improv. So much great comedy happens.
Speaker 6: There none of it out of my mouth, and I'm
Speaker 6: sure they're employing some of the top guys.
Speaker 1: It's really not true.
Speaker 3: I did a show with you where you were the headliner,
Speaker 3: and it was people were a gate at how hilarious.
Speaker 4: They were there. They were like open wounds they were.
Speaker 1: There was a lot of puss in the audience.
Speaker 3: There was uh yeah, it was very unsanitary.
Speaker 4: Was discussed.
Speaker 1: It was so gross. I had to leave.
Speaker 6: I remember, I kind of blocked it out, so yes,
Speaker 6: I do now remember performing at that pussy show.
Speaker 1: It was like the trench is a WW one crazy.
Speaker 6: I thought w W one was a wrestling league for
Speaker 6: a second, I forget that.
Speaker 4: It's a war.
Speaker 3: That's my new personality is the guy who likes wrestling.
Speaker 1: No longer a woman.
Speaker 6: Oh shoot, if you if we start talking trash about
Speaker 6: WW one, basically everyone that's over eighty five just turned
Speaker 6: us off.
Speaker 1: Yeah that's right.
Speaker 3: We seriously lost our I don't even know those are
Speaker 3: those people are older than baby boomers?
Speaker 1: Yeah, what are they?
Speaker 4: They're older than Gen x ers. That's me.
Speaker 1: That's yep.
Speaker 4: Just Nirvana and bubble Gum.
Speaker 1: Oh we had such a good time.
Speaker 4: I loved it.
Speaker 1: I really did. I can't believe it's over.
Speaker 6: You've never heard us before, and then you've started a
Speaker 6: new podcast for twenty fifteen.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, Hi, this is do you need a Ride?
Speaker 1: Hi?
Speaker 4: That's the name of our I don't think we say
Speaker 4: it often enough.
Speaker 1: No, I totally agree with that. I think we should.
Speaker 3: I think we should actually have the theme song going
Speaker 3: very quietly under the whole podcast.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, like Christmas music.
Speaker 1: Yeah right, but it's just the chorus that was my nightmare.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that, along with the wipers going. This is also
Speaker 6: our driving in the Rain episode.
Speaker 1: Yes, that's right.
Speaker 3: If anyone has driven in Los Angeles in the rain,
Speaker 3: you know it's an intensely high risk operation.
Speaker 1: People are stupid and bad at driving, right.
Speaker 6: And but at times I like it, like if you're
Speaker 6: it depends on the situation you're in, because I kind
Speaker 6: of like how everyone is all of a sudden cautious
Speaker 6: and scared. Yeah, because no one's going eighty five and
Speaker 6: trying to pass people on the right. And there's no
Speaker 6: goddamn motorcycles true true, or r croch Rocket or Harley.
Speaker 6: If you're a motorcycle guy, you're only my friend once
Speaker 6: you're not sitting on that that.
Speaker 4: That what hog.
Speaker 3: Yeah, once you fell off it and got severe brain damage,
Speaker 3: that's when will help you.
Speaker 6: I'm sorry that you hit your head. Let's go to
Speaker 6: the hospital, new friend. But if you're like no, it's okay,
Speaker 6: I'm getting back on.
Speaker 4: You're dead to me.
Speaker 1: Dead to me.
Speaker 6: I own bubbles bleak into your brain. It threw your blood,
Speaker 6: death defying bubbles.
Speaker 3: That happened at one of your audience members at the
Speaker 3: improv that night, Oh yeah, brain bubbles.
Speaker 4: It was weird. A whole table of them.
Speaker 1: It was so weird.
Speaker 3: It was like almost like your comedy was causing brain
Speaker 3: in It was weird.
Speaker 6: They all collapsed at once. And I remember I had
Speaker 6: that funny ad lab check please, and I pointed at
Speaker 6: their table a little.
Speaker 4: Did we know they had all passed?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean it's sad. At the same time, more
Speaker 3: stuff for us, right they all Yeah, at.
Speaker 6: The end of the day, At the end of the day,
Speaker 6: they went to a better place, the comedy store.
Speaker 4: Neither of us like it. There, I was kidding.
Speaker 3: I love the We're severely misrepresenting ourselves and our podcast conversation,
Speaker 3: I know.
Speaker 6: And I'm misrepresenting my style of comedy. Two old timey
Speaker 6: jabby jabs.
Speaker 3: But you know what, that shows your range exactly shows
Speaker 3: all the choice. You know what, you make a choice
Speaker 3: of the kind of comedy you want to do. But
Speaker 3: like Picasso, who could also paint a vasive flowers all plane,
Speaker 3: you can do street comedy, plain jokes, whatever you like
Speaker 3: to call them.
Speaker 6: Right exactly, because he also could do faces with eyes
Speaker 6: in the wrong places.
Speaker 4: And I do that jingle.
Speaker 6: I do faces with eyes in the wrong places.
Speaker 1: I'm Picasso.
Speaker 4: Please Picasso stops singing, Please just paint. Do you have
Speaker 4: a class to teach?
Speaker 1: Please put some pants on? You're so old?
Speaker 6: Why do you guys all they get syphilis on purpose
Speaker 6: because they think it makes them more creative.
Speaker 4: Have you heard that? No?
Speaker 6: Yeah, a lot of the old Impressionist painters.
Speaker 3: The rumor going around about it.
Speaker 6: It was like, ooh, how severe is your syphilis? You
Speaker 6: must be paintings. I'm real wild ship?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 4: Yes, what? Yes?
Speaker 1: Why can't they just were ason or whatever?
Speaker 6: It's easier to just jack get a you know, a
Speaker 6: shady woman other night mm hmm. To give you a little.
Speaker 3: Sif waitch, did you watch the nick that series on
Speaker 3: Showtime about the old hospital in the eighteen hundreds.
Speaker 6: I wish I wish you met Nickelodeon, and there was
Speaker 6: a show Nick Nick Nick.
Speaker 7: Nick mag Nick Nickelodeon, The Nick, Oh you told me
Speaker 7: about that.
Speaker 1: I was a little bit obsessed.
Speaker 3: I love a period piece and I like learning because
Speaker 3: I don't have a formal education, so I like to
Speaker 3: watch television shows on Showtime that teach me what used
Speaker 3: to happen?
Speaker 4: You were a homeschooled Montsori.
Speaker 6: Style, Yes, that's right, style in the style of no teas.
Speaker 3: Yes, so just no education whatsoever, a lot of granola.
Speaker 3: But on the Nick, there was a woman whose husband
Speaker 3: gave her syphilis and her nose fell off.
Speaker 4: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: And this was a real thing that happened to people,
Speaker 3: and they used to have like no nose clubs, Oh
Speaker 3: my god, where people with no noses could go and
Speaker 3: hang out with other people no noses so they didn't
Speaker 3: feel bad about themselves.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Wait, where is April's.
Speaker 6: We've passed it, but we do a little quick ui,
Speaker 6: okay that we are picking up April Richardson. That's the
Speaker 6: April that she wasn't talking about. Where's April Flowers? I'm like, hey,
Speaker 6: we're in the midst.
Speaker 4: It's not me. I'm nuts, April. What I was trying
Speaker 4: to do. Oh that's a great porn name.
Speaker 6: If I had a porn name, i'd grow a beard
Speaker 6: and I would be dynasty. Oh that's like a camouflage
Speaker 6: but all gay.
Speaker 4: Oh, so you know it's work. I won't take my
Speaker 4: work home with me. Not that that's wrong, but I
Speaker 4: do believe it. We have established that. I think my
Speaker 4: comedy today.
Speaker 6: I thought I got worried that I chased all the
Speaker 6: old days away with our WW two stuff.
Speaker 4: So I'm just.
Speaker 1: Brought it back. Yeah, you did it. Oh, let me
Speaker 1: text April and come on down.
Speaker 4: Let's get April down. Here.
Speaker 1: Are we near her house right now?
Speaker 6: And we are basically right Oh, I bet this guy.
Speaker 6: I'll have a few things to say about where we're parked.
Speaker 8: Hi?
Speaker 1: Hi, Hi? Is there more space? Thank you? Oh that's
Speaker 1: very nice of you, Thank you. Thank I know it's small,
Speaker 1: That's why I bought it. Thank you, sir. Can you
Speaker 1: believe something nice to say it?
Speaker 6: I know, because he had the look on his face
Speaker 6: of someone that was going to really have some negative
Speaker 6: things to say about where we were leaving the car.
Speaker 4: But that's just his relaxing bitch face.
Speaker 3: But this was also a driveway.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he was buried. That was strange of him.
Speaker 1: No, no, I don't want to block this person.
Speaker 4: He actually set us up for a disaster.
Speaker 3: Wait was that Johnny Knoxville, an old Armenian man came costume.
Speaker 4: Is very concerned about what we're doing.
Speaker 3: That's okay, we have to be less concerned about what Okay,
Speaker 3: we're here, come down.
Speaker 4: What I'm saying is I'm scared of.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm just texting April.
Speaker 6: He's coming from the laundromat. Do you ever think that, Oh,
Speaker 6: he can't be a murderer. He puts quarters in a laundry.
Speaker 1: Machine and he patiently waits until they all get clean.
Speaker 4: He can't be a murderer. He has a via running shoes.
Speaker 5: He can't be a murderer.
Speaker 1: That means driving a Jennifer Christ's sake.
Speaker 6: Oh, it's funny that I said a villa because the
Speaker 6: night slasher what's his name?
Speaker 4: The other night I.
Speaker 6: Couldn't sleep, so I just wikipedia serial killers.
Speaker 1: Oh between the mirror, the nightstalker.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, that's one of the great because he had
Speaker 4: he really is.
Speaker 1: I can talk about it all day long.
Speaker 5: I do know. I laughed like that.
Speaker 6: Jesus twenty fifteen, twenty fifteen, let's laugh like we smoke
Speaker 6: a packa.
Speaker 1: Day, and let's start smoking a packa.
Speaker 6: Day, and let's buy gas like it's nineteen ninety nine.
Speaker 6: I can't look at that price.
Speaker 1: That's crazy.
Speaker 4: That's that's.
Speaker 1: And then you just keep making that noise can drive
Speaker 1: you to the hospital.
Speaker 4: This is just like.
Speaker 1: They all where is her? Sorry?
Speaker 4: Did she respond?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 4: Is that her? It is her? She's behind that pole? Mysterious?
Speaker 1: Is she hiding a pole?
Speaker 4: I think that's her.
Speaker 6: It is it is.
Speaker 4: It's so funny to me. There's a lot of uh there,
Speaker 4: she is? There, she is?
Speaker 6: She's getting in Oh god, it's locked.
Speaker 1: Sorry. Sorry, y. Yeah, that's so that you don't get
Speaker 1: dog hair all over your pants.
Speaker 4: Okay, there's a microphone back there, I think there is.
Speaker 1: Yeah, feel around. I don't have an inside light right now.
Speaker 3: Maybe this is uh, that's our funny trick to say.
Speaker 6: Hello, this is hilarious here. Why don't you have the
Speaker 6: one I'm talking into?
Speaker 4: Okay, Hi, Hi there?
Speaker 8: Did you don't know? I feel dumb if I'm sitting
Speaker 8: on it or something and I'm standing on it. Hold on,
Speaker 8: here's here's a cord.
Speaker 5: Hold on, hold on.
Speaker 1: Oh wait, let me get my flashlight on it.
Speaker 4: This is hilarious.
Speaker 1: Did it become separated?
Speaker 4: Thank you?
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, Well there.
Speaker 6: Is okay, so I've just switched channels. That won't matter.
Speaker 6: Well that I'm trying.
Speaker 4: I like to talk shop to be switched back. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I think so. It's not okay.
Speaker 5: This is awesome. This is like a long like Bob
Speaker 5: Barker mic.
Speaker 4: Isn't it great?
Speaker 5: Awesome?
Speaker 6: It's it's so everywhere that our podcast fields like they've
Speaker 6: done they're doing a game show.
Speaker 1: Yes you can have them?
Speaker 4: Do you just have them?
Speaker 1: No? No, not ours our precious mics, I think.
Speaker 6: I yeah, I always because we're in a moving car
Speaker 6: and the knobs on this are adjusted by even the
Speaker 6: gust of wind.
Speaker 4: Yeah, sure enough.
Speaker 1: The right suggestion, I've rubbed my.
Speaker 6: Thumb or elbow or some other I'm not going to
Speaker 6: predict what part of my body did it.
Speaker 1: You could never predict your boner.
Speaker 4: It's probably my dick.
Speaker 6: April Richardson, Hi, I know a really long time class
Speaker 6: put my hand in a holiday.
Speaker 5: How have you guys been? I'm sorry that my street
Speaker 5: is so terrible when it comes to parking.
Speaker 4: It's just we's.
Speaker 8: Especially because now that that big fancy restaurant is there.
Speaker 1: Also.
Speaker 8: Okay, I think yesterday that Paris Hilton was on my street.
Speaker 8: And the only reason I think this is because how
Speaker 8: weird is this? Right in front of my building there
Speaker 8: was a bright pink Bentley and where the Bentley thing
Speaker 8: was inside where there's supposed to be a b it
Speaker 8: was p h.
Speaker 5: On the front and the back, and so I was like,
Speaker 5: who else could that be?
Speaker 4: I guess someone that was handing out peace strips, But.
Speaker 5: I'm also like, who is he? Why is she on
Speaker 5: my street?
Speaker 8: Who is she hanging out with on my street of
Speaker 8: apartment buildings?
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's Russian ladies?
Speaker 4: Phil Henry maybe it was Phil Hendry.
Speaker 1: Was she getting waxed perhaps by an old Russian lady?
Speaker 8: Yeah, I don't make it a house called I don't know,
Speaker 8: house called, Yeah, Russian lady, I'll come to you.
Speaker 6: It was funny she came. She came into a coffee
Speaker 6: shop and she walked in. I was just working. It
Speaker 6: was in Venice, and I was like, wow, that looks
Speaker 6: like Paris Hilton, but a small human sized for because
Speaker 6: I don't know why.
Speaker 4: I think everyone's supposed to be.
Speaker 6: And I was wearing a shirt, a thrash hairt long
Speaker 6: sleeve shirt, and she goes that. She goes, that shirt's hot,
Speaker 6: said one of her cat and then everyone was looking
Speaker 6: at her and I was like, oh, that is Paris Hilt.
Speaker 4: This is a real story. She did say that it
Speaker 4: seems like I made that up.
Speaker 5: The worst brag of all time.
Speaker 4: I'm not bragging. I have little to no respect for her.
Speaker 4: I don't want to think.
Speaker 5: She's garbage, but I'm saying, like I it was just
Speaker 5: a weird thing. And well, here's the thing. Here's the
Speaker 5: super crazy thing.
Speaker 8: The l a lady that lives in the building next
Speaker 8: to mine is known as the Pink Lady.
Speaker 5: I don't know if you either of you have seen her,
Speaker 5: but like she she has pink.
Speaker 1: Hair, she only wears black.
Speaker 8: Yeah, it's weird that we're all color blind on my streets.
Speaker 8: She wears pink only pink, has pink hair dyed, her
Speaker 8: dog Pink, rides a pink vaca around and then so
Speaker 8: she's already like the local weirdo, like we're all like, oh,
Speaker 8: the Pink Lady. But then one day I was flipping channels,
Speaker 8: and you know how TLC has those like my Weird
Speaker 8: Obsession shows.
Speaker 5: She was on one of them. She was like that
Speaker 5: was her thing.
Speaker 8: She was like, I only have pink things, and they
Speaker 8: showed the inside of her apartment.
Speaker 1: I was pink love it.
Speaker 8: So I thought for a second like, oh, this is hers.
Speaker 8: But then I'm like, there's no goddamn way that lady owns.
Speaker 5: A Bentley and lives on my streets. No, that's what
Speaker 5: I'm saying. Like I thought the pink Bentley was hers,
Speaker 5: I'm like, oh my god, pink.
Speaker 4: Lady owns I didn't realize that. I heard the part
Speaker 4: about it, but she's I didn't know it was.
Speaker 8: But then I saw when I saw the pH in
Speaker 8: on the Bentley logo, I was like, oh, well, then
Speaker 8: I don't think that's got to be pairs.
Speaker 5: Who else could that be?
Speaker 8: It's either Angeline or Adeline the Corvette lighting she's still
Speaker 8: driving that old I see her.
Speaker 5: She hangs out of my hood all the time too.
Speaker 3: Yeah, there's like a pink there's a pink situation happening
Speaker 3: you live.
Speaker 6: That's when I noticed that when I see her Corvette
Speaker 6: whiz by, there's always like a twenty something dude in it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's her, man. She can get whoever she wants. Really,
Speaker 3: it's Angeline Chris how old. Her gloves are as big
Speaker 3: as your head.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean she has to be. I think have
Speaker 1: only talked about her.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I guess she also she eats at what's that
Speaker 8: terrible El Coyote at seven She loves Thousand Island dressing
Speaker 8: on the tacos. Dude, Okay, not only does she eat
Speaker 8: there every like every night between seven or seven thirty,
Speaker 8: because I see your car parked out in front every
Speaker 8: single night. How About when I first moved here, my landlord,
Speaker 8: I was like, wear some good Mexican food. And my
Speaker 8: landlord was like, oh, you gotta go to al Kyote.
Speaker 5: It's the greatest.
Speaker 8: And I'm like, okay, because I just moved here. So
Speaker 8: me and my now ex husband we go and like
Speaker 8: we get.
Speaker 5: I got a thing where I got tacos. I got
Speaker 5: some Kobe where they serve me peas with like peas
Speaker 5: and yes, and I was like, this is the best
Speaker 5: ship in town. That can't be.
Speaker 1: Right in Los Angeles.
Speaker 5: Yes, that is what my crazy old landlord, and.
Speaker 4: That's why he's now your ex husband. These tacos are
Speaker 4: so bad.
Speaker 3: This is so weird, David, Like this can't be right,
Speaker 3: Like this can't be the best recommendation.
Speaker 1: It's not right.
Speaker 3: I've Coyote, where we used to just only strictly get
Speaker 3: drunk in the in the nineties. You go there because
Speaker 3: their margaeraitors are like triple strong, and but the food
Speaker 3: is literally it's like two stoned kids in a college
Speaker 3: drawing room trying to make something out of nothing.
Speaker 1: Like I got served.
Speaker 3: I think maybe it must have gotten a tostata and
Speaker 3: it was literally like a flat chip with iceberg, lettuce
Speaker 3: and Thousand Island dressing on it, where I'm like, oh
Speaker 3: my god, now I missed my grandma who used to
Speaker 3: put the thousand dressing on everything, none of which has
Speaker 3: anything to do with Mexico.
Speaker 4: I hate peas.
Speaker 5: But that's the thing. It's not even americanized Mexican food.
Speaker 1: No, no, not to what I didn't get.
Speaker 5: It's like, this isn't even americanized.
Speaker 1: This is just like my favorite nothing.
Speaker 4: I guess my favorite.
Speaker 6: Part of it is there is a Spanish word for
Speaker 6: coyote that they decided not to use, El coyote.
Speaker 4: Yes, like when you're in.
Speaker 6: When in Austin they really like to shove the Alamo down.
Speaker 6: Everyone's throw out right, So they there's like a street
Speaker 6: called Guadaloupe, but everyone will like correct you and go
Speaker 6: it's Guadaloup wa And I'm like, really, but I just
Speaker 6: took Spanish in college in Montana.
Speaker 4: I believe it's Guadaloupe. People will stop and go.
Speaker 6: What oh you mean guadalop Yeah, take him right there
Speaker 6: and then on the bus.
Speaker 4: So they would say everything.
Speaker 6: In English and then repeat it in Spanish, so it'd
Speaker 6: be the next street it's guadaloup and then in Spanish
Speaker 6: they'd go, whatever, I don't speak Cala.
Speaker 4: That's the guadaloupthing.
Speaker 5: We do here where we all agree.
Speaker 8: Everybody just agrees it's Los Felis when it's really.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, what was zach alphanakasi stuff?
Speaker 1: The joke uh vita vita?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I knew I did that for real. Also when
Speaker 5: I first moved here.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because I say that instead of I.
Speaker 8: Thought cohna for real until I heard somebody else say
Speaker 8: it that lived here.
Speaker 1: I used to pronounce it in my head Kui hunga.
Speaker 5: That's way better.
Speaker 1: Sorry, I wasn't trying to one up your story.
Speaker 4: I always except that was way better.
Speaker 1: So this did we already say?
Speaker 3: This is our driving in the rain episode with April? Yeah,
Speaker 3: so we're just trying to uh because.
Speaker 4: We love a rainy night, just like Eddie.
Speaker 5: Edie my mom.
Speaker 3: That's her jam he had that he had windshield wipers
Speaker 3: in that song.
Speaker 1: That's why I love that song so much growing up.
Speaker 8: That is like one of Donna's jams because when I
Speaker 8: grew up that Juice Newton is her jams.
Speaker 5: Like you don't even be starting on like eighties country music,
Speaker 5: because that is my ship.
Speaker 8: To watch the totally Overridge Boys. I had so many
Speaker 8: Overage Boys seven inch records, which I still have.
Speaker 5: I was already my Mobby suit and American.
Speaker 1: Maid and thousands of dollars.
Speaker 4: That reminds me of April. When when I did your
Speaker 4: h what's the high school there? Save by the Belly,
Speaker 4: go Bayside, sorry your podcast, go base. Yes, when after
Speaker 4: I did that, you.
Speaker 6: Gave me some album frames and for the longest time
Speaker 6: I sat on him, I was gonna give him.
Speaker 4: Back to you.
Speaker 5: Would I couldn't find my albums, none of them.
Speaker 6: I couldn't find any of my albums, And then the
Speaker 6: other day in a scared I r s tex Search.
Speaker 1: Wait wait wait, wait? Can I guess what it was?
Speaker 5: I'm guessing Oakriage Boys. I hope that's where this is
Speaker 5: the Sea was from.
Speaker 1: I'm feeling Kenny Rogers the Gambler.
Speaker 4: Oh no, no, I never respected him. Never. Nah.
Speaker 3: He was the masters crossover artists of the eighties.
Speaker 1: Wait are we out of country? Are you gonna? Is
Speaker 1: it gonna be?
Speaker 4: When? When did you guys ever think like any stage
Speaker 4: of country? I was just talking about.
Speaker 8: The Oakreage Boys, and then you immediately were like, oh
Speaker 8: my god, album for week. So I was like, clearly
Speaker 8: you framed your Oakreage Boys albums.
Speaker 4: No, it was just albums in general.
Speaker 3: I didn't know that album. Yes, is it Special Beat Service?
Speaker 6: It's very close as you made me think of English Speed,
Speaker 6: which is just a hint.
Speaker 1: Is it the English Beat?
Speaker 4: No? No, it was just a hint. Madness, so close?
Speaker 4: So close?
Speaker 1: What really?
Speaker 4: There's only a third one? Yeah? Special?
Speaker 6: Okay, so I have an old Specials album? And then
Speaker 6: and then uh, Biz Marquis the diabolical Biz.
Speaker 5: These guys running around, these Jewish guys running around. That
Speaker 5: guy looked like a blues brother.
Speaker 8: I was like, and I remember that it's Friday night
Speaker 8: and they can't drive Saturday night and they can't that's.
Speaker 6: Right, wow, especially in this rain, they gotta be uh well.
Speaker 3: And also there's those big fur hats that's gonna absorb
Speaker 3: a lot of water that's gonna get heavy.
Speaker 5: But yeah, so that's cool.
Speaker 3: But wait, can I ask a question? The Bi Marquee
Speaker 3: album isn't the one where he's crying on the front.
Speaker 1: It's my favorite picture of all time.
Speaker 4: No, him and his him and his MC is DJ.
Speaker 4: I don't know which he's the MC his DJ, I
Speaker 4: don't know who what. They're eating cereal?
Speaker 6: But in the cereal it's tiny musical instruments that I
Speaker 6: think are really Christmas ornaments.
Speaker 5: Wait, so did you and these are like hanging.
Speaker 1: Up in your room?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, so thanks for the Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah.
Speaker 4: I sat on him for a year.
Speaker 3: Well you had to wait till the time was yeah,
Speaker 3: to figure out the perfect albums.
Speaker 4: Yeah or any And then I finally found him.
Speaker 3: What are all these people lining up for Purple Rosa
Speaker 3: Cairo's playing at the New BEV.
Speaker 4: I also found the men at work, but everyone frames
Speaker 4: that one.
Speaker 5: So yeah, come on, that's cliche at this point, Lo,
Speaker 5: you bad if it's not. What time is it?
Speaker 8: We seriously might drive by Angeline's car? Oh my god,
Speaker 8: because that's right, there's the elk. I'm telling you I
Speaker 8: walked by because this is on the way to Like
Speaker 8: I walked by like five nights in a row, and
Speaker 8: it was there, and there were times where she would
Speaker 8: just stand out outside, like just stand by.
Speaker 5: Yeah, maybe it's not till seventh.
Speaker 3: I think Angeline and her type, like with Dennis Woodroff
Speaker 3: and all those people, it's kind of like for New
Speaker 3: Yorkers it's the naked cowboy at times square.
Speaker 5: Oh didn't he's the guy with all the crazy stuff
Speaker 5: written on his car.
Speaker 3: Right, like I'm an actor Dennis Woodroff. Yes, okay, I
Speaker 3: don't think you've seen him. I think I didn't see it.
Speaker 4: I didn't see it. It's two. It's it's reflective.
Speaker 1: It's water everywhere.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you're right to see that guy around a lot.
Speaker 8: And then I also see the guy who whoever it
Speaker 8: is that has on the back of their car, like,
Speaker 8: you know, hire me, I'll be a Santa on stilts
Speaker 8: on a trampoline or whatever. Have you seen that took
Speaker 8: a picture of it because it's just in hand, Like
Speaker 8: it's those letters that you put on your mailbox, like
Speaker 8: like I'm an actor, I'm a whatever, I'll be Santa.
Speaker 8: I have a trampoline.
Speaker 5: I'm not joking like in my hood a lot that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Oh that's terrific.
Speaker 6: That's usually the letters someone to remind you they Jesus
Speaker 6: saves ye.
Speaker 5: Usually he might be that guy, the rainbow wig guy.
Speaker 6: I wish he would remind people about Jesus while jumping
Speaker 6: on a trampoline.
Speaker 5: That guy was in the set.
Speaker 8: My mom has her picture taken with that guy in
Speaker 8: the seventies. She was like, I saw the Jesus Saves guy.
Speaker 8: Oh now, yeah, whoever that guy is?
Speaker 3: Oh my god, if you haven't Dave Anthony's the doll
Speaker 3: Up podcast which sorry to triple cross reference podcast when
Speaker 3: and no One's self interested in the car right now,
Speaker 3: But there's a doll Up episode where they Dave tells
Speaker 3: Gareth about the Rainbow guy and it's the most fascinating
Speaker 3: stories he has, like no.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, there's that guy.
Speaker 3: Like I don't want to I'm gonna be like completely
Speaker 3: paraphrasing and making things up because I listened to it.
Speaker 1: A while ago.
Speaker 3: But basically, that guy used to go to every football
Speaker 3: game he could go to just to get on camera.
Speaker 3: And the people that the directors and the people that
Speaker 3: were shooting, because it's when they first started shooting team
Speaker 3: like sports things, they would all try to avoid shooting him.
Speaker 3: They would try to shoot around him all the time,
Speaker 3: and he started to catch on and then like hide
Speaker 3: the wig and then pop it out when he saw
Speaker 3: the cameras were shooting, like he would get behind the goalposts.
Speaker 3: It's such a fascinating story you had.
Speaker 8: It was just so we could get like well, because
Speaker 8: he was always just so we could get the Jesus
Speaker 8: saves like the John three sixteen on camera. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 8: because my mom, I know, she's got a picture of
Speaker 8: him that she took like in a Falcons game or
Speaker 8: whatever in like the seventies.
Speaker 4: Guess it's the same guy that has labels on the
Speaker 4: back of his car or I've.
Speaker 5: Just oh no, yeah, that's like someone.
Speaker 6: I'm just here because we didn't hire a grandpa.
Speaker 1: You just got oakage boys, all right.
Speaker 3: But my thing I was gonna say was just la
Speaker 3: is such I think Angeline and those types of people
Speaker 3: who are trying to get famous for famous sake on
Speaker 3: nothing is like la in a nutshell to me that
Speaker 3: it's hilarious and also that it works, like it does work.
Speaker 1: Do people love a person with a car of one color?
Speaker 8: Or every time I see Angeline because she does hang,
Speaker 8: I think, okay, she's also must be a creature of habit.
Speaker 5: I have had so many run ins.
Speaker 8: And Angeline and I am funny because also when I
Speaker 8: this is like I don't know, five years ago or so,
Speaker 8: when I went when Morrissey played the Palladium, he played
Speaker 8: ten Nights in a Row, and so I was in
Speaker 8: line out front, like ten nights in a row, and
Speaker 8: across the street is that coffee bean, And it was
Speaker 8: the same thing where like at five o'clock every single
Speaker 8: day at that coffee bean, she would go get coffee
Speaker 8: like to where everyone in line, Like by day three,
Speaker 8: we're like, oh yeah, there's Angeline, like and then I
Speaker 8: was talking to somebody else who goes, oh yeah, she
Speaker 8: eats at this place every day at noon, Like I
Speaker 8: think she has no joke, Like the same four places
Speaker 8: she goes at the exact same time every day, Like
Speaker 8: if you didn't already know she was mentally ill.
Speaker 5: Now you have this evidence, but like, yeah, she's nuts.
Speaker 3: And order a serial killer. Then you'd be able to
Speaker 3: jump on that schedule and she's gonna be It.
Speaker 1: Would be so easy.
Speaker 8: But it is funny that she so when I see
Speaker 8: her at all these places, she does always have people like
Speaker 8: taking their pictures with her or getting her autograph. Sure,
Speaker 8: and I'm trying to think back, like how I found
Speaker 8: out who she was and it really was. I think,
Speaker 8: when doesn't she have In some movie they blow up
Speaker 8: it's like Independence Day or something like aliens blow up
Speaker 8: a billboard of hers, like I'm not even shooting you,
Speaker 8: Like I think that was the first time I saw
Speaker 8: who she?
Speaker 1: Remember, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: In many establishing shots of movies from the eighties that
Speaker 3: were set in La Yeah, and Angeline billboard would be
Speaker 3: part of how you knew that's where she was.
Speaker 4: Kind of like the guy on Rollerblades with the turbine
Speaker 4: that plays.
Speaker 1: Guitar in Vennis, exactly that guy.
Speaker 4: I it was so weird to see him because I
Speaker 4: see him all the.
Speaker 6: Time and he seems like a sweet old guy, right,
Speaker 6: and he on the guitar, like I like what he does,
Speaker 6: and it is I'm going to multitask on near the ocean.
Speaker 4: That's his that's his business.
Speaker 1: Kind of awesome.
Speaker 4: And but he I saw him get into a kind
Speaker 4: of nice Mercedes. Mercedes is am I trying? No, he's
Speaker 4: not homeless at all.
Speaker 6: He's getting that that residuals from the movie La Story.
Speaker 1: Yeah, totally.
Speaker 8: Well, he tried to sell me a CD because we're
Speaker 8: not one of the times. How many did you buy?
Speaker 8: Because he's got a Mercedes.
Speaker 5: That's the thing, you guys.
Speaker 8: I paid for the Mercedes, treated of a Mercedes for
Speaker 8: his entire CD stock.
Speaker 1: It's good music.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's all shredding all the time.
Speaker 3: And now, April, do you want to talk a little
Speaker 3: bit about Morrissey because you are his number one fan.
Speaker 3: I know he's going through some stuff right now. Is
Speaker 3: there anything you want the people to.
Speaker 4: Know through he?
Speaker 5: Well, I think he just maybe had like skin.
Speaker 8: He said something about cancer in some interview and I
Speaker 8: think it's just he's a drama queen though, and so
Speaker 8: I bet he just got mole removed or something.
Speaker 5: I know, it's weird, right, I don't know, it got
Speaker 5: a little weird.
Speaker 8: Because like he this past tour, I flew a little
Speaker 8: too close to the sun.
Speaker 5: My friend like open for him.
Speaker 8: And like would tell me I don't want to talk,
Speaker 8: but like, okay, yeah, I know I got to know
Speaker 8: like Tony Wisconsin to who like produced, Like I just
Speaker 8: got to know a little too much in there, yeah,
Speaker 8: where I was like.
Speaker 5: Oh, I don't I don't want to know this much
Speaker 5: about this guy. Yeah, like don't get me wrong, Yeah
Speaker 5: I am his number one fan. I totally know he
Speaker 5: can be a dick and like all that kind of stuff,
Speaker 5: like you can't.
Speaker 8: You know what I mean, But like, yeah, there were
Speaker 8: just some sad things like about him drinking too much
Speaker 8: and everything where I was like, oh, I don't want
Speaker 8: to know he's like a sad drunk.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, you don't want to But then it makes it.
Speaker 8: Then it's like, okay, well that makes sense that that
Speaker 8: guy would like go drink alone because like he's professionally sad.
Speaker 6: Every time when you start reading about a hero and
Speaker 6: then they get to that catheter story or something, you're like, whoa,
Speaker 6: he slipped in his own sad.
Speaker 1: We wait a.
Speaker 5: Little a little bit where I was.
Speaker 8: Like, oh, maybe I should know as much, but I
Speaker 8: mean I don't know. I still followed him around. I
Speaker 8: still went to see him like ten times this year.
Speaker 8: It was pretty fucking great. Like the last well he
Speaker 8: canceled on me. I was supposed to see him in Detroit,
Speaker 8: and yeah, I should have switched out on a plane ticket.
Speaker 5: But I would to see in Texas. ACTUAL wouldn't see
Speaker 5: him in Austin.
Speaker 1: Whoa jesus, I did not see that car. I did
Speaker 1: not see that car.
Speaker 5: I don't think that was your fault.
Speaker 3: Was he coming out of a parking spot?
Speaker 5: I don't know what's going on. I think he's just
Speaker 5: like a honkathon. I'm just trying to out everyone is
Speaker 5: honking for what the fuck?
Speaker 1: That was super crazy.
Speaker 5: I don't think that's you at all. I'm not kidding.
Speaker 5: I think somebody's doing something behind you. You know.
Speaker 4: The hankon happens right between four months and the and
Speaker 4: that's not even a joke.
Speaker 5: Let's go eat it, red lobster.
Speaker 1: Oh. I can't. I can't go there.
Speaker 5: I can't allergic to delicious things.
Speaker 1: I like Morrissey hate Joy, So I can't go there.
Speaker 5: But you could just o d on those chick her
Speaker 5: baby biscuit.
Speaker 1: Dude.
Speaker 3: We had one year at Thanksgiving, my friend Adrian at
Speaker 3: Thanksgiving and her in laws brought a bag of cheddar
Speaker 3: Bay biscuits.
Speaker 1: From a lot. Stated it was the greatest thing. I'd
Speaker 1: never had them before.
Speaker 8: Let me tell you one of the greatest nights of
Speaker 8: my life because the only Red Lobster I know around
Speaker 8: here is in Compton and it's by the Forum.
Speaker 5: And there was one night where me and Ship and.
Speaker 8: Like Kyle Canadan and a bunch of people went to
Speaker 8: eat at Red Lobster and then saw Prince.
Speaker 5: Oh, it was pretty much the greatest night of our lives. Wow,
Speaker 5: it was amazing. Yeah, perfect night.
Speaker 1: That was pretty great.
Speaker 4: I could have seen Prince in Portland.
Speaker 6: I had tickets and I was I was slated to go,
Speaker 6: and I stayed at my friend's house and she's an
Speaker 6: old friend and I don't want to whatever.
Speaker 4: I don't want to tell the story now.
Speaker 1: Because I'm too old.
Speaker 4: No, she will hear it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, telling these stories and then I'm hurting people's feelings.
Speaker 6: How the point is, I got locked in a fucking
Speaker 6: room and I'm like, I'm supposed to be a prince
Speaker 6: right now, but I can't get out of this room.
Speaker 5: And my friend, the feelings of your kidnapper.
Speaker 4: And I had to pee in a in a never mind?
Speaker 5: Stories are how do you get locked in a room?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 6: I just did it, just I had to pee in
Speaker 6: a clothes hamper. What I was in there for like
Speaker 6: five hours? And I'm like, I'm supposed to see Prince
Speaker 6: right now.
Speaker 5: Were your friend kept you locked in?
Speaker 4: It was not No.
Speaker 6: Everyone thought I had gotten out and my phone died
Speaker 6: and I got locked in a room.
Speaker 4: It's like, why didn't you just text me my phone died,
Speaker 4: that's what happened.
Speaker 5: Why didn't you just knock on the door and be like,
Speaker 5: I'm locked in this room?
Speaker 6: Was could not Kno, there wasn't someone on the other
Speaker 6: side of the door rubbing their hands together.
Speaker 5: I don't are I know.
Speaker 6: That's why I wanted to stop telling this story really quick.
Speaker 6: The story is over, Prince.
Speaker 1: The story is over, except were you on mushrooms? Yeah?
Speaker 5: There's what are we missing here?
Speaker 1: There's a large slice.
Speaker 4: Of leaning out.
Speaker 1: All right, we'll move on.
Speaker 8: Okay, I feel like you're not seeing friends is the
Speaker 8: least important part of the Yeah.
Speaker 4: No, that's why I started to tell it. But then
Speaker 4: I just want to back out.
Speaker 3: So let's let's let him back out and let me
Speaker 3: take over by very smoothly telling the story of the
Speaker 3: night that we went to see Robert Smith and the Cure.
Speaker 1: Yes, and my crazy roommate who.
Speaker 3: Was obsessed with the Cure, made us go after the
Speaker 3: concert to stand outside his hotel so we could try
Speaker 3: to get his autograph. Right, So we stood for three
Speaker 3: hours out so many times outside the hotel, and then
Speaker 3: a van rolls up and the drunkest human being ever
Speaker 3: to exist on the planet, Robert Smith, Oh no, rolls
Speaker 3: out of this van.
Speaker 4: No.
Speaker 3: What's great about Robert Smith is he already looks like
Speaker 3: a fucked up person. Yes, like when he's fresh for
Speaker 3: the show at seven point thirty, he already looks like
Speaker 3: he's a drunk high school girl. He basically looks like
Speaker 3: me in high school, all drunk with smeared lipstick and
Speaker 3: dyed black hair.
Speaker 1: And he came out and.
Speaker 3: Like did the thing where you know when you're drunk
Speaker 3: and then you just kind of like you're trying to
Speaker 3: take things in and you haven't caught up with regular time,
Speaker 3: so he would. He was just staring at all of
Speaker 3: us like he didn't understand what was happening. You talk,
Speaker 3: you all know, my friend Kristin like goes up and
Speaker 3: she's like, I'm Kristin, I met you and tries to
Speaker 3: tell him some story like you remember me, and it's
Speaker 3: like the man is clearly like almost needs to be hospitalized.
Speaker 1: For being so drunk.
Speaker 3: And she's like and this and that, and he's like, oh,
Speaker 3: like nonverbal. It was one of the funniest things I've
Speaker 3: ever seen, Like she's just telling some long story about
Speaker 3: how they'd already met once before and he did not
Speaker 3: know where he was.
Speaker 5: Did he have like handlers, whim or anything, or was
Speaker 5: it just him, like it's stumbling out.
Speaker 1: Of It was kind of just him because it was
Speaker 1: so late at night.
Speaker 3: They were all drunk, so I think it was probably
Speaker 3: a couple roadies, maybe another guy in the band and him.
Speaker 1: It was really fun.
Speaker 6: Someone says handlers. I just imagined them in Cowboy club.
Speaker 6: Was that made me laugh.
Speaker 4: I've only heard that he is the sweetest like most.
Speaker 5: I met him once in Atlanta, and I don't think
Speaker 5: he was. He acted he was. He was very, very nice,
Speaker 5: but he acted like a five year old kid, like
Speaker 5: he was so shy and so like like you know what.
Speaker 4: I mean, She's that weird ass movie with Sean Penn
Speaker 4: and where.
Speaker 5: He was supposed to be him, he just he really
Speaker 5: was the only thing and I was like, is this
Speaker 5: a joke movie?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 6: The only thing missing was any cure music but his
Speaker 6: wife and it was Francis McDermott, and he had quit
Speaker 6: doing music because some kid committed suicide listening to his
Speaker 6: said cure like music, and his friend was David Byrne
Speaker 6: in it Did that really happen? No?
Speaker 4: No, And he ends up hunting some.
Speaker 6: Nazi guy that and he buys a black truck and
Speaker 6: gets a gun and he drives to find this old,
Speaker 6: aging Nazi.
Speaker 4: To kill him. But he does it. It's an amazing movie.
Speaker 4: It's just but he acts like a five your old knonet.
Speaker 6: Sean Penn's performance ruins it for me because he's like,
Speaker 6: does this weird Truman Capote voice?
Speaker 4: I got the right, like, what are you doing? Weirdo?
Speaker 4: You could have at least watched Robert Smith's speak.
Speaker 1: Wait, let me ask, is this movie already out?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, it was like years old.
Speaker 5: Oh oh yeah it isn't. I feel like it wasn't.
Speaker 5: It probably went straight to video?
Speaker 4: Yeah it was. I stumbled on it on Netflix, went straight.
Speaker 1: To VHS.
Speaker 8: Restarted a VHS pressing planet. Yeah, but it was I
Speaker 8: think I saw on Netflix tow or saw the preview
Speaker 8: because I was flipping through and the three like the
Speaker 8: screen grab is, you know, Sean Penn looking like Robert Smith.
Speaker 5: So I was like, what the fuck is this? I
Speaker 5: couldn't believe it was a real man? Watch it looks
Speaker 5: like a joke movie within a movie, you know.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, I couldn't believe it existed.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and that Francis mcner, she was in it, So
Speaker 6: I'm like that legitimized it for me, Right, that's it
Speaker 6: Sean Penn should.
Speaker 5: But but yeah, I waited.
Speaker 8: I when I saw The Cure in Atlanta at the Roxy,
Speaker 8: like one hundred years ago, I did the same thing,
Speaker 8: Like I waited outside for like four hours for them
Speaker 8: to come out.
Speaker 5: And he was cool.
Speaker 8: I mean, he came out and like talked to everybody
Speaker 8: after the show, but it was yeah, he was really
Speaker 8: weird and shy and like.
Speaker 4: Looked at his shoes and Yeah.
Speaker 5: There are certain times where I'm like, oh, that ain't
Speaker 5: an act, you know what I mean, Like, Yeah, there
Speaker 5: are some people I see where I go, oh, you're
Speaker 5: so fake whatever. But then with him, I'm like, oh, no,
Speaker 5: you really are that weird?
Speaker 4: Right right?
Speaker 6: Yeah, I would only expect I'd be disappointed if he
Speaker 6: wasn't really that weird.
Speaker 5: Yeah, totally.
Speaker 4: He was like charismatic and yeah he comes.
Speaker 8: Out like giving everybody finger guns and ships like you're Robertson.
Speaker 6: The other story I have about hanging out with DiCaprio's Roberts.
Speaker 4: Where's her English accent?
Speaker 5: Where are you call me?
Speaker 4: Bro? That's weird?
Speaker 6: It looks beautiful, but take down your fucking Christmas lights
Speaker 6: ramond on Santa Monica Boulevard.
Speaker 1: Those do look beautiful.
Speaker 5: Well the bottom exactly is that twenty four?
Speaker 4: I feel like green light Goo? Whoa? Whose grandpa?
Speaker 8: Am?
Speaker 4: I so many grandpa's. I'm sorry, No, I don't care.
Speaker 1: I'm still traumatized by that weird honking. It looked like
Speaker 1: I was going to broadside a person. I promising with you.
Speaker 5: I think every I think the guy behind you did something.
Speaker 4: Can I be the Devil's Advocate or the Is that
Speaker 4: a movie with?
Speaker 1: Yes, it is one of the greats.
Speaker 4: Can I Can I be a Keanu Reeves movie? Right now?
Speaker 4: I think that after the initial honk.
Speaker 6: We were all kind of in shock, and your reaction
Speaker 6: was to go fifteen for a little while, and then
Speaker 6: more people started honking.
Speaker 5: No, but I think but people even behind the guy
Speaker 5: behind you were honking.
Speaker 1: They didn't like that. I got scared, and he didn't.
Speaker 4: Want to drive. They're like, step out of it.
Speaker 3: Just good.
Speaker 6: They were trying to do some honk, some road therapy,
Speaker 6: some honk honk road therapy.
Speaker 3: I have a clip on my phone if I can
Speaker 3: find it before this light turn screen of Kennu Reeves
Speaker 3: in The Devil's Advocate, because it's this one part that
Speaker 3: I couldn't when I watched it on TV. I could
Speaker 3: not believe it happened. And it did, and I'm going
Speaker 3: to find I.
Speaker 5: Remember seeing that movie in the theater and it actually
Speaker 5: scared again. Yeah it was a teenager.
Speaker 4: I don't know why I'm worried. I'm so worried. And
Speaker 4: what's gonna honk at us again? Do you want me
Speaker 4: to find it?
Speaker 1: I don't know if you.
Speaker 5: Can, Pretty Jane, I went to that justin Timberlake show. Gee,
Speaker 5: it was amazing.
Speaker 4: It was amazing.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I saw that billboard. This is gonna make me
Speaker 8: sound like a real brat. But I saw that billboard
Speaker 8: when I was walking around, and my dad is like
Speaker 8: a super high roller. My stepdad gambles all the time
Speaker 8: in Vegas. So I called him and was like, Hey,
Speaker 8: is there any chance you give me tickets to this
Speaker 8: justin Timberlake show?
Speaker 5: Can you like call your high roller dude? And he
Speaker 5: did and like totally got me tickets. So I just
Speaker 5: drove there.
Speaker 1: What then is?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: It was rat And then I was totally alone.
Speaker 8: I didn't know he was two tickets and nobody was here,
Speaker 8: nobody could go with me, and so on Twitter, I
Speaker 8: was like, if there were any is if there's anybody
Speaker 8: in Vegas who wants to.
Speaker 5: Go to the show with me? But I was like
Speaker 5: ladies only, no dudes, it's not a fake date, no creeps.
Speaker 8: And a girl answered me. So I went with like
Speaker 8: a total stranger and how was she? She was nice,
Speaker 8: she was super cool.
Speaker 4: I like that story.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it was really fun and the show. Yeah, I
Speaker 5: think that's how she knew who I was nice. Yeah,
Speaker 5: it was super fun.
Speaker 4: I like that story.
Speaker 1: Social media is really bringing him a basis.
Speaker 5: I'm sorry it's working.
Speaker 1: It really is social The Republicans can deny it that
Speaker 1: is not true.
Speaker 3: Here's here's the clip from Uh, here's the clip from
Speaker 3: Devil's Advocate. This is a part where they offer him
Speaker 3: a job, and this is Canna Reeves. Reeve's laughing at
Speaker 3: the man who's talking to him. If you'd hold your
Speaker 3: microphone up to my I'm.
Speaker 4: Going to use my microphone.
Speaker 1: Shoot speaker. Oh oh, this isn't on there we go.
Speaker 4: And get it. Yeah, it's so technology.
Speaker 1: I can't drive in the rain and show you a
Speaker 1: clip at the same time.
Speaker 4: That was originally what the Eddie Rabbits song.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you have that so readily available on your phone.
Speaker 5: You watch that clip all the time.
Speaker 3: It's one of my favorite things. No, I was scrolling
Speaker 3: through as I was driving. This happen, please do. It's
Speaker 3: really funny. I was watching that movie, which is not
Speaker 3: a great movie, but there's some you like. I really
Speaker 3: do adore actors like Keanu Reeves that are just like
Speaker 3: ham bones. They're just like, oh, here here we go.
Speaker 3: Oh did everyone get that? It's the best thing of
Speaker 3: all time?
Speaker 1: Amazing.
Speaker 4: Kind of got to see his newborn bird baby look
Speaker 4: in his eyes.
Speaker 6: He I mean, no one ever said he's not a dummy,
Speaker 6: but man, everything I've heard about him is that he's
Speaker 6: nice as the dickens too, because yeah, but it's.
Speaker 1: Like he's due to be mean.
Speaker 5: I don't know.
Speaker 6: You know what I'm saying, it's not accidentally forfeiting money.
Speaker 6: He gets paid to pay like people that, wait, what
Speaker 6: does he do? He gave millions of his own dollars
Speaker 6: to the crew to make some Matrix movie and never
Speaker 6: never advertised it or anything. They're like, yeah, he gave
Speaker 6: everyone one million dollars and didn't get any money for
Speaker 6: making whichever Matrix movie?
Speaker 5: Wait, are you serious?
Speaker 4: Yeah, so he does.
Speaker 5: I had no I've never seen any of the Matrix.
Speaker 4: It's because he Yeah, they're laughable. Everyone loves them.
Speaker 6: But I'm I'm the only one that was laughing at
Speaker 6: you know what in the Matrix, there's a deaf person
Speaker 6: in the theater, and so they had subtitles up and
Speaker 6: they were coming up right before his lines.
Speaker 1: Oh so if you're seeing.
Speaker 6: At the bottom of the screen, it says Oki doki,
Speaker 6: and then he everyone fucking laughed. So I was in
Speaker 6: a theater of people that didn't enjoy the movie.
Speaker 1: You can't.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Arthur died was Wait a.
Speaker 5: Minute, so which one I thought that they were all
Speaker 5: really successful. So it's like, why would he have to
Speaker 5: put up his own money for it?
Speaker 4: I mean, maybe google it. It's it was an expensive
Speaker 4: movie to make.
Speaker 3: And maybe it may have been like a sequel that
Speaker 3: the studio wouldn't pay for it, but everybody else wanted
Speaker 3: to do it, and they were willing to pay him
Speaker 3: a bunch of money, but nobody else.
Speaker 4: That's exactly what's cool.
Speaker 6: And he and he has all these other like charitable
Speaker 6: things where he doesn't no one knows about it because
Speaker 6: he didn't go. Hey, guess what, everybody, Me and George
Speaker 6: Clooney and Ben Affleck went to this thing, you know,
Speaker 6: right right, Because even though those guys are awesome, they
Speaker 6: make sure people know when they're in Rwanda or whatever.
Speaker 1: Of course, I don't like any are there.
Speaker 5: So you guys know, I'm going to.
Speaker 1: Do a really cool hotel rooms there is the Hotel Rwanda.
Speaker 4: How's the light shot of me swatting flies out of
Speaker 4: this kid's eye? Is lighting good?
Speaker 5: I don't think Clooney is really like that.
Speaker 8: Yeah, come on, Cluin seems like a legitimate dude.
Speaker 5: He seems sincere Baffleck. I used to hate baffleck so much.
Speaker 8: And then when I saw the town, that's when I
Speaker 8: had to begin to go, Okay, I don't hate this
Speaker 8: guy that much.
Speaker 5: And then when I saw him a couple of times
Speaker 5: on Bill Maher, I was like, Oh, he might not
Speaker 5: be an idiot.
Speaker 4: No, he's not an idiot.
Speaker 1: He's an idiot, but.
Speaker 3: He really does seem like the guy that you would
Speaker 3: see in a bar who would pretend to pick up
Speaker 3: on you as a joke for his Yeah, that's a.
Speaker 5: Perfect thing I've ever heard.
Speaker 1: He just something about him, just always a smug smug.
Speaker 8: She like, yeah, and if you're gonna and especially if
Speaker 8: you're gonna package him to get, if you're gonna give
Speaker 8: me baffleck with Matt Damon, I'm going Maddie Dames every time.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Mad Damon all day.
Speaker 4: So yeah, I even liked his ice bucket challenge video.
Speaker 4: I watched it a few times. Matt Damon did one yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: because he was like, it's really dumb.
Speaker 6: California is in a drought, so this is water from
Speaker 6: my toilet and if you think that's gross, it's cleaner
Speaker 6: than most of the drinking water in all these countries.
Speaker 6: And so he made it about a water thing and
Speaker 6: like that love without belittling, you know, the Luke Garrick's
Speaker 6: disease or whatever.
Speaker 5: He seems like a genuine dude too part his own
Speaker 5: toilet water on his head.
Speaker 1: He's the best person on the plan.
Speaker 5: He's way way better than Benaffoleix. How are they best friends?
Speaker 1: I actually just watched the Legend of bager Vants last night.
Speaker 3: What because one of my favorite things to do is
Speaker 3: on off hours on Twitter to live tweet movies.
Speaker 1: Yes, I think it's really funny and stupid movies that
Speaker 1: have been around for a long time.
Speaker 5: Of course, totally we forgot it. Will Smith, Yes, Will
Speaker 5: Smith is all knowing.
Speaker 3: He's the magical Negro that that was all the jokes
Speaker 3: at the time were like, but it's actually not a
Speaker 3: horrible movie like on the Grand Scheme. Like if we're
Speaker 3: talking like on the Devil's Advocates scale analogies.
Speaker 4: In it, Well, I think you need to take a
Speaker 4: sandwich to your relationship with your wife. Is it?
Speaker 8: Matt the golfer and you're in the sand draft take
Speaker 8: a little off the top.
Speaker 3: Matt Damon is a golfer who then went to World
Speaker 3: War Two and was like shell shocked and all messed
Speaker 3: up from the war. So and he left his girlfriend,
Speaker 3: Charlie's Throng, who is at her most beautiful. She's young,
Speaker 3: but she's also like a little bit. I'm in no
Speaker 3: way going to say she just has slightly more weight.
Speaker 4: Her face isn't a monster yet, well.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean, Like she's she was when
Speaker 1: she started. She had more baby fat like on her face,
Speaker 1: body faces.
Speaker 4: Yeah, she's and denim could be fat. Come on, April,
Speaker 4: you got some baby fat jeans right, look at it.
Speaker 1: She was singing.
Speaker 5: They say baby fat on the butt, but it was.
Speaker 1: Actually like kind of engaging.
Speaker 3: And I'm telling you that Matt Damon is like, how
Speaker 3: do you deny Matt Damon him?
Speaker 1: I mean, I watched all of We Bought a Zoo.
Speaker 3: Dude, I didn't I see all the movies kick Ass,
Speaker 3: Oh God, the Born movie, and he's doing another one.
Speaker 1: He's coming back to the franchise. Did I get you?
Speaker 4: I watched them all all.
Speaker 5: I love Matt Dames.
Speaker 8: The only thing is I feel like he might be
Speaker 8: short of me in real life, but like he's one
Speaker 8: dude where I'm like, I don't care.
Speaker 5: I don't even care about.
Speaker 1: No, No, he's got he's got a sparkle in his eyes.
Speaker 4: I didn't know women hated short men until uh, that's
Speaker 4: what you just said.
Speaker 1: No, I say I hate him. I have my own tall,
Speaker 1: tall girl issues.
Speaker 4: I I just.
Speaker 6: What's on that Tinder for a little and it hurt
Speaker 6: my feelings. And because no one, I never got a
Speaker 6: match thing.
Speaker 4: I never so I got off there.
Speaker 5: I was like this, I feel I was on there
Speaker 5: for like a month and never got a match to beautiful.
Speaker 4: I don't understand follow up. I fucking I will never
Speaker 4: I hate it. It made me feel terrible. But every
Speaker 4: woman on the Chris five uh five eleven and up.
Speaker 6: Please, Like, can you imagine if a dude said speak
Speaker 6: up in higher only happens.
Speaker 3: All the time, imagine anywhere in the entire world we
Speaker 3: live in.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, but no one voices it on a and
Speaker 4: it's okay to have it on like.
Speaker 5: I think they are Chris, we're too old for Tinder.
Speaker 5: I'm not even being funny like it. I was like,
Speaker 5: I'm too old for that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's it was.
Speaker 1: It was.
Speaker 4: That's just moment.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but truly, because it's like.
Speaker 8: So many of the dudes, at least two in the pictures,
Speaker 8: they would be like flexing or whatever.
Speaker 5: I'm like, oh, that's how young you are? Is that
Speaker 5: you think this is a good intro.
Speaker 3: It's all like it's guys in the under armour on
Speaker 3: Running Canyon, Yeah with Oakley Blades, Like could you be
Speaker 3: the one where it's like you look like a murderous
Speaker 3: account And because.
Speaker 6: Those are the dudes on there, I was horrified that
Speaker 6: someone would that knows me would see me on there, and.
Speaker 8: I'm yeah, I got off so much of that, like
Speaker 8: when I I'm just definitely too old for that. And
Speaker 8: when I was in Vegas for New Year's Eve, I
Speaker 8: was there.
Speaker 5: Alone and like this guy hit on me. He was nice,
Speaker 5: like whatever, he was fine, he wasn't a creep. But
Speaker 5: his two opening questions, the very first.
Speaker 4: Two things he said to me were where do you
Speaker 4: work out?
Speaker 8: What?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 8: What?
Speaker 5: What's your Instagram? And do you have any tattoos?
Speaker 8: Though there is two first questions, I was like, you
Speaker 8: are I just immediately went I'm way too old for you.
Speaker 8: Oh because if those are yeah, because those are the
Speaker 8: first two things you want to know about me as
Speaker 8: a person.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I was like, na dude, and I was ten
Speaker 5: years older than him.
Speaker 3: I just think it's so impossible because to whether you're
Speaker 3: on social media trying to meet people, which then is
Speaker 3: just saying it's purely surface, like we're all turtles and
Speaker 3: I'm just gonna judge you by your shell, right, which
Speaker 3: has nothing to do with what people are actually like.
Speaker 3: I was talking to my friend about this and I
Speaker 3: was like, Tinder makes no sense to me, because that's
Speaker 3: like for me, like you at work working on a
Speaker 3: TV show. All the times you'll get like a fake
Speaker 3: crush on some grip that you see across the room
Speaker 3: that's like a super cute guy that you know whatever,
Speaker 3: But then you're.
Speaker 8: Amazing, amazing, I'm sure do not apologize the genius.
Speaker 1: Meet them at the party. When you meet them at
Speaker 1: the party, they're like the most.
Speaker 3: Boring person, or they're like whatever, they're politically offensive or whatever.
Speaker 1: It is like the idea that you think you can.
Speaker 1: But but that's the other thing is Tinders for hooking up.
Speaker 3: It's not for trying to meet a person that you
Speaker 3: could give a shit about or want to spend time with.
Speaker 1: It's just about hooking up.
Speaker 5: Which I just still feel like is a young man's game.
Speaker 1: Well, hell, yeah.
Speaker 4: Everything.
Speaker 6: When I was on there, every single person said, hey,
Speaker 6: I'm not here to hook up, I want to get
Speaker 6: married or whatever.
Speaker 5: I'm Tinder.
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, almost everyone. Well I set to grown ups, right,
Speaker 6: and uh maybe not. Maybe I also had some kids
Speaker 6: in there, but whatever, it was. I believe someone when
Speaker 6: we when they say that, and I'm like, well, I
Speaker 6: guess I'll leave you. You're crazy if you're looking for
Speaker 6: based on five photos. Now, I know you're mentally ill.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I want to have a bab here's me in
Speaker 4: a vintage tennis skirt, but then also a baby.
Speaker 3: So you're doing that on Tinder, or you're in a
Speaker 3: bar trying to walk up to a person like hey,
Speaker 3: I like your hat.
Speaker 1: Like there's no way to win.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 6: When my mom like stopped drinking and she like wanted
Speaker 6: to still date, I was like, I wish there was
Speaker 6: something where someone could go like before basically I'm saying
Speaker 6: I invented match dot com.
Speaker 4: It's just before I knew it existed because the Internet wasn't.
Speaker 5: There was no cubid.
Speaker 4: Yeah you have.
Speaker 1: I remember you saying, why do you think that's some
Speaker 1: cool dudes on there? Really? Yeah?
Speaker 8: Because I think it's more I think it's more serious minded.
Speaker 8: It's more people my age, and you've.
Speaker 4: Got to fill out a profiles, not just like, hey,
Speaker 4: take a picture exactly.
Speaker 5: It's not It's not just five pictures.
Speaker 4: Five dick pictures. Yeah, is that what I did wrong?
Speaker 3: It was.
Speaker 1: Not yours.
Speaker 3: They were all different dicks from around the world, just
Speaker 3: clinical not even dick pic.
Speaker 5: Screenshots from like the surgery channels.
Speaker 4: They were straight out of a health book.
Speaker 1: And here's the main vein that everyone loves to talk about.
Speaker 4: My main vein. Knew. I think five a guy at
Speaker 4: that nude beach and say my main vein would be great.
Speaker 3: I think the only way to meet people is to
Speaker 3: go to Blick Art Materials on Beverly at night and
Speaker 3: just and brows with a kind of sadness about yourself.
Speaker 1: A charcoals.
Speaker 4: I get it, ever working oils. I don't like how
Speaker 4: it doesn't drive fast enough. So what size is your feat?
Speaker 5: How tall are you?
Speaker 4: What size is your feet? Don't you have an Instagram statoo?
Speaker 8: That was That was so crazy and I just was like, yeah,
Speaker 8: I'm too old for you, dude, and he was like, no,
Speaker 8: you're not. I mean like and then I found out
Speaker 8: he was a professional breakdancer?
Speaker 1: What are you doing?
Speaker 4: What's on stage?
Speaker 8: He texted me like, here's the thing. I ended up
Speaker 8: giving him my number because he said it in such
Speaker 8: a way. And again he was a nice, charming dude,
Speaker 8: like I do not want to date him. He was
Speaker 8: perfectly fine though, Like I've been hit on by creeps
Speaker 8: and been like, do.
Speaker 5: The funk out of her, creep, But this guy was
Speaker 5: like a pleasant a pleasant conversation.
Speaker 8: At least especially when he was like when he was like,
Speaker 8: I'm a professional break dancer, I was like, oh, that's
Speaker 8: actually cool. And like he talked about like being in
Speaker 8: music videos, like doing international competitions, all is creepy.
Speaker 6: Talk about the day he got uh he got drafted
Speaker 6: from amateur ranks.
Speaker 1: But the way that he were professional my number.
Speaker 5: I wish I could remember it because.
Speaker 4: It was almost like was it well, head spinning? Should
Speaker 4: I be?
Speaker 5: I feel like I'm supposed to be quiet out of respect.
Speaker 4: Out of respect for whatever? Fire? Are you having a stroke?
Speaker 1: What's happening?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: I don't know or directly, what are you doing?
Speaker 4: Apparently?
Speaker 1: Why was that? It is a fire truck just drove
Speaker 1: to our cars?
Speaker 4: He wanted, boy, maybe they did they just drove.
Speaker 5: I think we were blocking the driveway. They just drove
Speaker 5: was the flower shop whatever he was, he just drove
Speaker 5: into it.
Speaker 1: Okay, amazing.
Speaker 3: That was insane because I wish our listeners right now
Speaker 3: could have seen that you came into.
Speaker 6: Your t bone and your legally had a red light,
Speaker 6: and that was a fire truck coming from the opposite direction.
Speaker 4: Just it looked like he was going to do a
Speaker 4: U turn, and then he just drove towards us.
Speaker 5: It was like seeing a tree. It was like being
Speaker 5: in a tunnel on the train coming right at you.
Speaker 6: It's just some fireman trying to get April Richardson. Hey
Speaker 6: do you have any tattoos?
Speaker 4: She's gone, that's on fire. I can't put out I.
Speaker 1: Lost her again.
Speaker 5: Well yeah, so this guy, I wish.
Speaker 8: I could remember the technique because he just said it
Speaker 8: in such a way that like I couldn't go, you
Speaker 8: can't have my number. I've read the game Trust twice.
Speaker 8: By the way, when I was reading the game, a
Speaker 8: dude did come up to eat a bar. It was
Speaker 8: at the shortstop and like tried a game trick on me,
Speaker 8: like fully from the book, and I go I was like, hey,
Speaker 8: what chapter is that from?
Speaker 5: And he was like what.
Speaker 8: I was like, I'm reading the game right now. I'm
Speaker 8: pretty sure that's in chapter three or whatever. I was like, yeah,
Speaker 8: he like walked off and I called him out and
Speaker 8: he walked off.
Speaker 4: Oh that's the best.
Speaker 5: It was totally the best.
Speaker 4: That's like what you want to have him?
Speaker 5: It was pretty great.
Speaker 1: What if he was your husband?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Nice guy, a really nice guy who was nagging me?
Speaker 4: So is this the thing that you would do? Those
Speaker 4: are nice shoes? Do they come in your size? And
Speaker 4: then high five? High five someone else in your triple set?
Speaker 4: I think, let me put on my ski goggles.
Speaker 5: Why not?
Speaker 4: Be right right?
Speaker 5: You got a pea?
Speaker 4: Yes, I know some of that yet that I haven't.
Speaker 8: That book is actually really fascinating, yes, because it's like
Speaker 8: half of the book. The sad part about that kind
Speaker 8: of stuff is it does work. Yeah, it works on
Speaker 8: care and I were talking about more weak willed people.
Speaker 8: But it definitely works, and it definitely is rooted in
Speaker 8: like just kind of psychology.
Speaker 5: One o one you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I enjoy a good nagpally. Oh it's there was a guy.
Speaker 1: It was a guy that put his hands out.
Speaker 3: It was the moment of getting out of the car
Speaker 3: after a date where you don't know if someone want you,
Speaker 3: don't know where you are with.
Speaker 1: Are we gonna kiss? Are we gonna hug? Are we
Speaker 1: just going to be like by? See later? And I
Speaker 1: was so nervous about it.
Speaker 3: I'm such a I'm such a nervous weirdo anyway with
Speaker 3: all that stuff. And he just put his hands out,
Speaker 3: so I had to put my hands in his hands,
Speaker 3: and then it just broke all of it. It was
Speaker 3: just like, let's just break the physical barrier. I can't
Speaker 3: explain it, but it was really effective.
Speaker 4: See that I appreciate. It's like, oh, that's a good idea,
Speaker 4: not a hey, I hate your sweater, want to go out?
Speaker 8: Sometimes I don't know, I don't know how it works,
Speaker 8: but the idea behind it is, unfortunately the truth of
Speaker 8: you know, hot girls are used to getting everything their
Speaker 8: whole lot, like a hawk girl is used to getting attention.
Speaker 5: And is used to all dudes always falling all over her.
Speaker 8: So the idea being that if you don't give her
Speaker 8: the attention, or if you make it known that you're
Speaker 8: not impressed by her, she's going to be intrigued because
Speaker 8: she's gonna be.
Speaker 4: Like, what the what's this?
Speaker 5: All guys fall at my feet? What's this guy's deal?
Speaker 5: And so that's kind of like the science behind it
Speaker 5: or whatever is tower of nerdy dudes. Oh try try
Speaker 5: to hot girls.
Speaker 6: The ultimate, the ultimate version of that is not even
Speaker 6: looking at them and walking like.
Speaker 4: Look at me. Yeah, that's never Hey, I'm sorry. Usually
Speaker 4: people hit you didn't even look at me.
Speaker 5: You didn't even look at me. What's your deal?
Speaker 1: I'm going to chase you out of this bar?
Speaker 4: Yeah, leave me alone. I'm pacing around worrying about my career.
Speaker 8: So yeah, I mean that's the thing is like a
Speaker 8: lot of that stuff actually does work, but it's not
Speaker 8: like you should do it because it's still Dick moves.
Speaker 8: But half of the book is, well the guy, So
Speaker 8: the guy who wrote it, Neil Strauss, like he I
Speaker 8: don't have am I totally have you guys read it?
Speaker 1: No, No, I've like I've seen it. I had to
Speaker 1: read it for a job.
Speaker 8: We were just fascinating because he goes into it being skeptical,
Speaker 8: Like he goes into it being like, there's no way
Speaker 8: the ship works that I know about it. He talks
Speaker 8: about like the first half of it is like talking
Speaker 8: about the techniques, and the second half is like how
Speaker 8: he used them and they did work, and now he's
Speaker 8: like fucking all these ladies with all these pickup dudes,
Speaker 8: and how it gets like weird and gross.
Speaker 3: But that also say it sounds like a sales technique
Speaker 3: like that, that's what they used to do at the
Speaker 3: fair when you'd go in and they'd be like showing
Speaker 3: knives and then they'd be like, I mean, I thought
Speaker 3: mine was you know, I used.
Speaker 6: To knives at the fair for cutco for real. Yeah,
Speaker 6: so the production I was in some dumb reality thing
Speaker 6: but it was comics. It was like a spoof of
Speaker 6: reality shows. But the crew then worked on the pickup
Speaker 6: art that show.
Speaker 4: It was like overlapping.
Speaker 6: They were working on it towards the end of our
Speaker 6: show and uh and they the makeup girl said, everyone
Speaker 6: was like, oh yeah, this guy is a goofball.
Speaker 4: I'm I'm.
Speaker 6: His powers won't work on me. And she said he
Speaker 6: did sleep with most of the women that dealt that
Speaker 6: worked on the show.
Speaker 1: Even even though she said I made out, I.
Speaker 6: Made out with him, and I know I didn't even
Speaker 6: know what was happening. Discussion and so then I was
Speaker 6: getting on a plane and he got on the plane
Speaker 6: and he was wearing like shitty Janco jeans and those
Speaker 6: kind of smelled. He looked like a magician. And I
Speaker 6: was like, hey, you were working with the three ball
Speaker 6: or whatever the company I think it was three and
Speaker 6: he's like yeah, yeah, and he was looking around desperately.
Speaker 6: I was talking to him on a plane where he
Speaker 6: had nowhere to go. He was sitting near me.
Speaker 4: And he was staring at everyone like a murderer, like
Speaker 4: he was obsessed. He was so empty.
Speaker 5: Yes, that's how the book.
Speaker 8: Like the book ends with him talking about how all
Speaker 8: those guys in the pickup artist scene it does. It
Speaker 8: becomes they're just like all sex obsessed and they all
Speaker 8: it's like a score they're keeping and they end up
Speaker 8: like fucking like five girls a night because it's like
Speaker 8: it just becomes their life is like conquering women.
Speaker 5: So I don't doubt it. I mean, that's it's totally
Speaker 5: gross and creepy.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean to you.
Speaker 1: Just kidding.
Speaker 4: A reason man, Yeah, mystery mystery.
Speaker 3: I just think it's funny because there it's it is
Speaker 3: weird to me that someone hasn't put together a book
Speaker 3: of like the real things that people like, but it's
Speaker 3: always because the other It's like girls are writing books
Speaker 3: for girls about guys, and it's always like put in
Speaker 3: your hot rollers or whatever, where guys are like, we
Speaker 3: don't give a shit about that, and then guys are
Speaker 3: writing books for guys where it's like you got a
Speaker 3: pinner to the wall and I will murder you, and
Speaker 3: it's just impossible.
Speaker 1: It's just I feel very negative about it all, very negative.
Speaker 4: Oh I know I can hear you. I got my
Speaker 4: tonsils out and then he un deviated in my saptim.
Speaker 4: This was a couple of years ago.
Speaker 1: Mystery.
Speaker 6: Yeah, he's a doctor, isn't me that I'm the one
Speaker 6: that jumps around.
Speaker 4: Let's not point anything.
Speaker 1: It's a podcast.
Speaker 4: It's me pointing a finger at my own finger.
Speaker 6: I uh no, I a doctor did a nose doctor,
Speaker 6: a rhino plastic person. I needed my tonsils out because
Speaker 6: they gave me arthritis and ship they were disease balls.
Speaker 6: But while I did, he said, your nose has been
Speaker 6: broken a few times. Let's take your undeviate your septum.
Speaker 6: And for like a year it was amazing. I had
Speaker 6: better sleep. I quit snoring up or down, April left
Speaker 6: and then uh yeah, and then it just came back,
Speaker 6: and along with it he installed some snort mechanism.
Speaker 4: So when I laugh now, when I breathe in, oh,
Speaker 4: your doctor is a clown.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's hilarious.
Speaker 4: One of my nipples squirts like a flower.
Speaker 1: You had no business going down there.
Speaker 4: He was a clown man. He's a clown man. To
Speaker 4: be fair.
Speaker 5: He did graduate with honors from clown college.
Speaker 1: He knows what he's doing. You just shouldn't be doing.
Speaker 5: You just thought you were the guy from Operation. You
Speaker 5: just dick anything anywhere.
Speaker 1: Leave the bread basket where it is.
Speaker 4: Anyway, I sound like an idiot when I laugh. Now,
Speaker 4: this isn't it? Is it? Yeah?
Speaker 1: This is it?
Speaker 5: That's my car?
Speaker 4: If this is it? Yes?
Speaker 3: Is that about the twin towers? I'm reading April's license plate.
Speaker 8: Even more embarrassing. It is the catalog number for new
Speaker 8: Orders Technique album.
Speaker 5: Oh but see you don't he's not got it is
Speaker 5: because you don't know that unless you know it.
Speaker 8: You know what I'm saying, Like, if you just look
Speaker 8: at that, that doesn't necessarily look like a vanity plate, No,
Speaker 8: not at all.
Speaker 5: But then if you're in the know you go, Holy ship,
Speaker 5: you go.
Speaker 1: I have to with her. That was number one.
Speaker 4: That album Technique changed my life when I was in Nice.
Speaker 5: It's my favorite.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, it's so rad. That's that's where it's like, Wow,
Speaker 4: my sister's awesome.
Speaker 6: She gave me this music. I don't have to listen
Speaker 6: to dire straits. Let me put down you stand by
Speaker 6: me soundtracks for a moment.
Speaker 3: Although they are making money for nothing, I do agree
Speaker 3: with that, but I would like to listen to something else.
Speaker 4: It's nice to get your chicks for free. But then
Speaker 4: it becomes a contest and.
Speaker 5: A night and it's we're a top hat bodies and god.
Speaker 6: Hearts an actual peacock on your head, a severed peacock.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, gross? Is it gross? Or did you
Speaker 4: just or did I just get your phone number?
Speaker 7: Blood pouring down his face, soon dressed like a huge
Speaker 7: male peacock, full body peak costume, pecking women's eyes out.
Speaker 1: You're stupid. This is nagging.
Speaker 5: I was now to have to get out.
Speaker 4: I mean, yeah, we usually end it, uh, we just
Speaker 4: let it fizzle out to the title.
Speaker 6: There's nothing. We never say this is the end. We
Speaker 6: just let you kind of awkwardly get out.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, that's not true.
Speaker 4: That's not true at all. April, you're the.
Speaker 3: Best, April. Do you have things to plug and talk about?
Speaker 3: What are you're working on when I don't have a job.
Speaker 1: Okay, he needs it? Yeah what I what?
Speaker 5: Chris Hardwick. I'm going to open for him on some shows.
Speaker 5: So that's fun.
Speaker 1: That's great.
Speaker 8: That starts next weekend on the road. Yes, in Sattle
Speaker 8: and Portland and Vancouver.
Speaker 4: And are you getting on a little plane?
Speaker 5: No, I hope not. I don't think so. No, not
Speaker 5: a Buddy Holly plane. Yeah, no, I think a regular
Speaker 5: sized plane.
Speaker 4: No, they don't. The tiny jets they're the best.
Speaker 5: No, I'm not getting on one of those. I don't
Speaker 5: think commercial airlines only. Sure it's rider.
Speaker 1: Okay, smart smarts have.
Speaker 5: The ball right now.
Speaker 4: Put a bowl of fruit in there too, too.
Speaker 5: That's also demands.
Speaker 4: Eminem's no green Ones.
Speaker 1: That's awesome. And but you're still doing Go Bay Side.
Speaker 5: No, it ended a few months ago, because it's like
Speaker 5: the show's over.
Speaker 1: I watched and you did every single There is a ceiling.
Speaker 4: There's a ceiling.
Speaker 5: Yes, So I'm like trying to think of my next idea.
Speaker 4: Did you ever have I know you had mister Belding.
Speaker 4: Did you have anyone else? Hell?
Speaker 5: No, I didn't have mister Belding. You didn't, way man, Okay,
Speaker 5: he's creepy. Maybe that's a dream I had, right, No,
Speaker 5: I did not have mister Belding.
Speaker 4: Do you have anyone else? Screech? No? Good?
Speaker 5: Oh you mean the guy who just got arrested.
Speaker 6: He stabbing that And they said, oh no, I was
Speaker 6: signing an autograph and I must have accidentally poked him.
Speaker 4: With the pen like.
Speaker 5: May like, you're right, who asked for your autograph?
Speaker 4: I mean I was riding my autograph with a knife.
Speaker 3: What I love about your podcast is that you recently
Speaker 3: got mentioned for something. It was like a recommendation, remember,
Speaker 3: and the picture they used. I can't remember specifically what
Speaker 3: it was, but the picture they used was when I was.
Speaker 1: On it with you. Oh nice, don't do you remember that?
Speaker 1: And oh, I think gets a picture. I'm sitting on
Speaker 1: a couch. I can't even explain to you.
Speaker 4: You're weird about pictures.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, but it's said terrible No, oh no,
Speaker 1: I feel bad.
Speaker 5: No it's not.
Speaker 8: Yeah, but I remember it was like saying because it's
Speaker 8: like a new thing now that people are doing TV
Speaker 8: show podcasts.
Speaker 5: Oh oh, that that's kind of what it was about, because.
Speaker 1: But it kind of mentioned you as one of the
Speaker 1: best ones, didn't it.
Speaker 5: I mean maybe is it weird?
Speaker 8: Yes, sort of, because like now it's a thing though,
Speaker 8: Like I was the other day somebody you pointed out
Speaker 8: the number one podcast on iTunes right now is to
Speaker 8: do to watch Gilmore Girls.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, my friend Pat Walsh was gonna do that.
Speaker 5: Yeah, so it's like a thing now. Yeah, and you
Speaker 5: were there America.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well so are mobile podcasts. A lot of people
Speaker 4: are jumping on that bandwagon.
Speaker 1: Is that true?
Speaker 5: This is such a rat idea, like.
Speaker 4: An actual band they're in and they podcasting. No, there
Speaker 4: is another podcast that's in a bus Who ripped You Off? No,
Speaker 4: he already was going to do that.
Speaker 1: There's also there's no ripping off.
Speaker 6: There's no you're right all ideas in the world. It's
Speaker 6: just out in the universe and people pluck away at things, right,
Speaker 6: and what.
Speaker 3: Happens within the car that's what matters exactly, Like how
Speaker 3: we almost crashed on Beverly Yes.
Speaker 4: Yes, Tomitry Martin didn't hear me tell those two jokes
Speaker 4: that he bull hair.
Speaker 1: Chris is going to name one too real, too real,
Speaker 1: too real.
Speaker 4: Well, i'd like to end it with positivity. Yes, I'll
Speaker 4: edit that out. Okay, Hey April, good to see you again.
Speaker 1: Ye. Yes, you guys too, Sorry that we had to
Speaker 1: push it so late. We were supposed to start so
Speaker 1: much earlier.
Speaker 5: No, it's okay, okay, it's crazy kicking it all right?
Speaker 4: And you've been listening to do you need a ride?
Speaker 4: D A Y N A R.
Speaker 5: I leave in a you wanta way back home? Either
Speaker 5: way we want to be.
Speaker 2: There, doesn't matter how much baggage you claim to give us.
Speaker 2: Time and a turmano and.
Speaker 1: Gay, we want to send you off inside.
Speaker 5: You wanna welcome you back home?
Speaker 1: Tell us all about every scared or.
Speaker 4: Was it fine?
Speaker 5: Now for?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do your need ride to ride? Do you mean with
Speaker 4: Karen and cress
Speaker 8: M