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Speaker 1: This is intergalactic John, This is Alien Sam on the

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Speaker 1: International Okay Storytime podcast station, and we have some human

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Speaker 1: stories coming up, not alien, but before we make a landing,

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Speaker 1: stick around for this two minute not alien ad break

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Speaker 1: before we get to these interstellar stories.

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Speaker 2: My mother's boyfriend made me realize how insecure my stepmother is.

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Speaker 3: I mean, if it helps, yeah.

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Speaker 2: My father has been married to my stepmother for six

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Speaker 2: years and they have two kids together. I'm seventeen years old,

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Speaker 2: I'm quiet, clean up after myself, and I work part time,

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Speaker 2: so I pay for many of my own things. I'm

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Speaker 2: not perfect, but I've never been a problem. Still, she

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Speaker 2: always made me feel like one. By the way, this

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Speaker 2: comes from Master Tangerine six seventy and if you want

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Speaker 2: to sumit your own stories, go to the r slash

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Speaker 2: Okay Storytime subured it. I'm Sophia, I'm Riley, and we're

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Speaker 2: here to give good advice. Goof Ley, but we don't

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Speaker 2: have all the answers. We only know what we'd do,

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Speaker 2: So let us know what you would do in the comments,

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Speaker 2: and Op says it started with her showing annoyance whenever

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Speaker 2: I went to my father's house. My mother taught me

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Speaker 2: to always wash my own dishes. But I clearly remember

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Speaker 2: hearing my stepmother tell my father that she would not

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Speaker 2: clean other people's dishes or cook food for me.

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Speaker 3: So she's complaining instead of communicating that to you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, also just doesn't even seem like that's true. I

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Speaker 2: think that was the first time I felt like a

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Speaker 2: nuisance in a place where I used to feel comfortable. Ah,

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Speaker 2: that's so sad. My father and I used to take

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Speaker 2: trips together, and I honestly felt excited about going on

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Speaker 2: vacation with my little brothers. But then they started going

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Speaker 2: on vacations together as a family and I was no

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Speaker 2: longer part of that family. She did not like me

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Speaker 2: going with them. Then the Christmas photos started. It felt

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Speaker 2: strange when they took a picture with me, and then

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Speaker 2: she would say, okay, now one with my family.

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Speaker 3: Saydees, that is wild.

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Speaker 2: Mean, why are you even getting with the guy that

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Speaker 2: has a child if you don't even you know, want

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Speaker 2: That terrible and I had to step aside. The photos

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Speaker 2: they have hanging around the house show baptisms and family moments,

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Speaker 2: and I'm not in them, even though I was present.

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Speaker 3: Tom out. Now I'm really mad. What the religious yeah,

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Speaker 3: baptisms and they're over here. You're not a part of

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Speaker 3: the family. Yeah, what happened to the guy that was

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Speaker 3: like love everyone?

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Speaker 2: They to that? Nope, what are we doing not loving everyone?

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Speaker 2: When my siblings were born, she really hated it when

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Speaker 2: I was around them. She resented my presence. I remember

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Speaker 2: once asking about this in a Facebook group about stepmothers

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Speaker 2: and getting responses from women saying that my stepmother's behavior

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Speaker 2: was normal. So I decided to try not to feel

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Speaker 2: bad about it. Wait, what are you in a Facebook

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Speaker 2: group with other stepmothers And they're like, oh, yes, of

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Speaker 2: course I always treat my children terribly. My step children suck.

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Speaker 3: So it's like, oh, he's trying to find an answer,

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Speaker 3: and this word.

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Speaker 2: Is going, I don't know if we should go to

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Speaker 2: like the stepmother Facebook group?

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Speaker 3: Why not?

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Speaker 2: Well, I feel like that's where you find out, I

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Speaker 2: don't know, you find all the other mean stepmothers. It

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Speaker 2: seems it's.

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Speaker 3: Spying on the enemy and understanding like the ammunition you

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Speaker 3: can get.

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Speaker 2: It's like, how do I deal with my stepmother? I

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Speaker 2: forgot to go undercover.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, huh, I'm gonna start joining Facebook crews, girls Unite Facebook.

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Speaker 2: Hey, ladies. We all have the same problems, right, let's

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Speaker 2: talk about them.

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Speaker 3: That you're a guy?

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Speaker 2: What no? I think. As the years went by, it

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Speaker 2: stopped hurting, or at least I thought it did. And

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Speaker 2: I met my mother's boyfriend, who I will call Luigi

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Speaker 2: because he looks like him. He has been dating my

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Speaker 2: mom for two years, but he has been her friend

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Speaker 2: for many years. He has a son from previous relationship.

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Speaker 2: Luigi is really kind and funny, and it felt strange

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Speaker 2: to feel comfortable around him. One day, he was organizing

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Speaker 2: a vacation and I was happy to hear him include

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Speaker 2: me in his plans. His sons and I get along well,

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Speaker 2: so he even invites me on outings with them. My

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Speaker 2: mother is pregnant, and I think that revived old trauma

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Speaker 2: related to my stepmother. I automatically expected to be left

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Speaker 2: aside by Luigi, but that did not happen. My mother

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Speaker 2: and Luigi always include his son and me in every plan.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's so lovely. This is so good. At least

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Speaker 2: you have one side of the family who wants you around.

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Speaker 2: Because of this, I slowly began to realize that my

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Speaker 2: stepmother's behavior was not normal, even though it's still hurt.

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Speaker 3: Luigi knows how to keep it, keep the bros together. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: he's he's super.

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Speaker 2: He's a superbro, super stepdad. I guess situation super Mario

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Speaker 2: Brosisi bro, super Luigi Bros. Maybe he lives in a mansion.

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Speaker 3: Mmmmm, could be good.

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Speaker 2: Everything came to a head yesterday when my father and

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Speaker 2: his family were going to take the typical Christmas photo.

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Speaker 2: My father told me he would take one with me later,

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Speaker 2: like every year, and that he keeps them in his office.

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Speaker 2: I stayed home, Yeah, why would come He's like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: you can come over. You're not gonna be in the pictures, Like,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna take a selfie with you on my phone later.

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Speaker 2: But these ones are just for the family.

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Speaker 3: You know what is She's the sweater that your grandma

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Speaker 3: made for you but you never wear, but you still

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Speaker 3: keep around because it's from your grandma.

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Speaker 2: Oh is Ooo, that's so sad. Go give this beautiful

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Speaker 2: sweater to Luigi. He'll appreciate it to wear it. I

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Speaker 2: felt silly for feeling sad again. My mother hugged me,

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Speaker 2: but I was tired, and I finally told her about

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Speaker 2: the real treatment I've been receiving.

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Speaker 3: I was about to ask, have you told her?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, for the first time I saw Luigi angry. He

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Speaker 2: called my father and I heard him tell him everything.

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Speaker 3: Whoa.

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Speaker 2: I even laughed a little when he said my stepmother

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Speaker 2: was an insecure psychopath. Nice Luigi standing up for Ope.

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Speaker 3: I mean someone had to be a dad in this scenario.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and your dad wasn't doing it, Luigi, step down.

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Speaker 3: Remember all the stories that we get of the dad

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Speaker 3: gets with like his new booth thing, and the new

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Speaker 3: booth thing doesn't like the kids. Yeah, and the dad's

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Speaker 3: just like whatever. Oh, I guess so it's fine, this

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Speaker 3: is normal now.

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Speaker 2: Never liked that kid anyway.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like this speaks a lot about their character.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, bad dad, not great person. Although Luigi apologized to

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Speaker 2: my mother afterward, he told her that what I have

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Speaker 2: been experiencing is a form of psychological child mistreatment and

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Speaker 2: that he will not be involved in it anymore. Hearing

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Speaker 2: those words made me realize it's true. I have been

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Speaker 2: bullied by a grown woman just for existing she's insecure

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Speaker 2: about a child. I was a kid when I met her.

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Speaker 2: I was a kid when she made me feel insecure

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Speaker 2: in my own house. I was a kid when she

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Speaker 2: started calling me a weekend daughter.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, Oh she called you a part time daughter.

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Speaker 2: That's crazy.

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Speaker 3: Actually, I would call my grandmammy that from my.

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Speaker 2: Great grandfather, the part time wife.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and she only came on the weekends. Dude, that

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Speaker 3: makes sense. But you can't say that about a daughter.

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Speaker 2: No, okay, when she's seventeen and already being bullied. I

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Speaker 2: do not want to see my father again. I do

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Speaker 2: not want to live my adulthood around a person who

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Speaker 2: hates me. At the same time, I do not want

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Speaker 2: her to win by giving her what she wants and

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Speaker 2: making me disappear. Honestly, who cares about her? Yeah, do

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Speaker 2: what you need to do, not what she wants. Ignore her.

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Speaker 3: And if you're watching this and you've been through this,

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Speaker 3: I'm really curious, how did you get over that? What

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Speaker 3: does your life look like now at holidays?

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Speaker 2: Do you still have a relationship with that family member

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Speaker 2: or Because this sounds dark, yeah, but you only have

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Speaker 2: to deal with your parents when you get older around holidays.

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Speaker 2: I mean it doesn't really sound dark, it's just it

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Speaker 2: can be true for some people. Well, it's sad to me, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think it's sad.

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Speaker 3: So it's like Okay, I don't have to deal with

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Speaker 3: these people for two days out of the year, for

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Speaker 3: two weeks out of the year.

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Speaker 2: Really, yeah, I mean right now seventeen, So I think

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Speaker 2: that I don't know if she's like looking at it

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Speaker 2: that way yet m hm, because she's still a minor.

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Speaker 2: But I definitely would be looking into how do we

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Speaker 2: get your mom to have full custody for right now?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Edit apparently this post was shared in a sepreddit about

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Speaker 2: stepmothers because I have been receiving private messages from people

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Speaker 2: trying to justify my stepmother's behavior. What's up with all

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Speaker 2: these stepmother grooves? Stepmothers are in like a little like

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Speaker 2: freaking cult, cult of the stepmothers, and they're like, well,

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Speaker 2: you can't say that about her. She just doesn't like you.

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Speaker 2: It's not her fault.

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Speaker 3: I was more matically imagining, like a stepmother what do

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Speaker 3: you is the community club? What is that called country club?

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Speaker 3: Like a stepmother country club? Because they're all have they

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Speaker 3: got their botox in, they got their like big sunglasses on. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and they're all like their minivans.

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Speaker 2: They all love van. This is just the bad stepmother's guys.

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Speaker 2: Don't worry, Okay, I will not add those messages and

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Speaker 2: will block those accounts. I do not need anyone turning

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Speaker 2: the person who hurt me into the victim. I do

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Speaker 2: not need a group of cruel adults trying to make

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Speaker 2: me feel guilty for what happened when I was a child.

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Speaker 2: If you're seventeen, still you're still a child. Absolutely nothing

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Speaker 2: justifies mistreating a child. Being a stepmother is difficult, then

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Speaker 2: try being a little girl who doesn't understand why an

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Speaker 2: adult living in the same house hate sar.

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Speaker 3: Dude, who knew that Cinderella would be so true over

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Speaker 3: all these years?

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Speaker 2: I guess. I mean, we keep reading these Cinderella stories,

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Speaker 2: but I don't understand why anyone in the comments is

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Speaker 2: trying to see the stepmother's side here.

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Speaker 3: I know why. Why Because they are the stepmoms. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: they feel that way, and they've done it, and they've

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Speaker 3: done it yeah, and this is the only place on

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Speaker 3: earth that they can voice themselves yeah and have support.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Clearly they're getting somebody to support them. Common one says,

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Speaker 2: have you talked to your dad about this? How can

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Speaker 2: he allow this? I'm so sorry you were mistreated, but

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Speaker 2: it's good that you have Luigi.

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Speaker 3: Yes, w's the chef for Luigi.

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Speaker 2: Luigi comes through every day.

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Speaker 3: We got We got Rob, Luigi and Rob. Don't you

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Speaker 3: remember the Rob story? No, everyone in the comments tell

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Speaker 3: Sophia about the Rob.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, let me know tildyr Rob.

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Speaker 3: Basically, Rob was a stepdad and he paid for his

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Speaker 3: little girl's like college, all this stuff, wedding, and then

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Speaker 3: op the little girl, her dad comes into the picture. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: It's like, will you forgive me for not being around?

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Speaker 3: She said yes, and then he was like, can I

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Speaker 3: walk you down the aisle? And she said yes. Instead

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Speaker 3: of Rob, I remember this who was there for everything,

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Speaker 3: and Rob, still with a loving heart, forgave her but

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Speaker 3: was hurt and like was like, I can't. I gotta

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Speaker 3: keep myself a boundary, but I still love you. But

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Speaker 3: he's still like I don't know what all happened, but

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Speaker 3: I just I remember what Rob made me feel.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Rob and Luigi.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, one of the top three step parents in Okay

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Speaker 3: storytime history.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Name them in the comments below, oh p. He says,

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Speaker 2: in the past, I talked to my dad about feeling

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Speaker 2: bad when she kept my siblings away from me when

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Speaker 2: the first one was born. I remembered my dad scolding

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Speaker 2: her and telling her to let me hold him. But

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Speaker 2: he never did anything more than that. He has pictures

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Speaker 2: of me at his workplace and in his home office,

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Speaker 2: but he's like, I have a picture of you.

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Speaker 3: Yes, that makes me feel so bad. He did my drawer,

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Speaker 3: you're on the wall.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but it hurts that he asks to keep me

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Speaker 2: hidden as if I were his secret, illegitimate daughter. Comment

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Speaker 2: two says, well, I guess we know who your real

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Speaker 2: father figure is. How is Luigi more of an adult

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Speaker 2: than anyone else in your life? Can we all agree?

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Speaker 2: Luigi is an amazing human? Oh Pie, Christmas is around

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Speaker 2: the corner. Please make sure he gets a gift under

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Speaker 2: the tree. He's an amazing person and oh p He

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Speaker 2: says he wants a scratching post for his cats, so

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Speaker 2: I plan to give him a big one. With my

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Speaker 2: mom and Opie responds to a downloaded comment about being

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Speaker 2: more comfortable around her mother's partner than her father's wife.

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Speaker 2: Opie says, what is not understood? It feels strange to

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Speaker 2: feel comfortable around my mother's partner since I never received

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Speaker 2: that treatment from my father's partner before. It feels strange

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Speaker 2: to feel comfortable around a parent's partner for the first time.

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Speaker 2: Strange does not always have a bad connotation.

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Speaker 3: You know, I will agree to that. Yeah. The only

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Speaker 3: thing I guess I can relate to this is I

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Speaker 3: have a friend that he's dating someone right now and

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Speaker 3: the parents are a little bit colder to him whenever

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Speaker 3: he's used to his family being like, oh, like hugs

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Speaker 3: whenever they first greet, and he's he's been telling me

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Speaker 3: he's been having to like work on that, yeah, and

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Speaker 3: work on like getting that relationship with his partner's parents. Like,

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Speaker 3: good to go. And it feels the same in this

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Speaker 3: scenario if you're so used to.

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Speaker 2: One, you know, a form of affection, yeah, or lack

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Speaker 2: of affection no peace case.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, lack of affection in this other guy giving you

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Speaker 3: unconditional love, You're like, wholla, it could be a little awkward.

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Speaker 2: This was supposed to be Like all those stepmothers in

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Speaker 2: that Facebook group said what she was doing was normal.

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Speaker 3: It should be doing that. Hopefully this unconditional love will

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Speaker 3: be so infectious to your life that you're able to

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Speaker 3: spread more of it to others.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, keep it going. But ten days later, Opie says.

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Speaker 3: I'm assuming this is after the holidays.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. We'll find out. After the day Luigi

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Speaker 2: said boundaries with my father and stepmother, my father did

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Speaker 2: not call or say anything until several hours later, when

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Speaker 2: he sent me a message saying, I'm so sorry, eha,

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Speaker 2: I love you. Okay, Okay, yeah, I mean, you gotta

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Speaker 2: put action to those words. You can say sorry, but

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Speaker 2: it doesn't really mean anything.

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Speaker 3: But several hours later though.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well maybe he was like trying to figure it out.

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Speaker 2: But I don't honestly think it means anything until he

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Speaker 2: starts showing up for OPI, and even that, I know

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Speaker 2: he might not want to have a relationship with him.

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Speaker 2: I felt strange reading it. It did not make me

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Speaker 2: cry or feel loved. I always wanted to be a

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Speaker 2: daddy's girl. I always loved my father and cherished the

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Speaker 2: few moments we had together without my stepmother making bitter comments.

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Speaker 2: But when I read that message, I felt nothing except

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Speaker 2: thinking same old thing. I did not reply. My father

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00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:24,080
Speaker 2: kept pictures of me in his home office. But why

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Speaker 2: do I have to be a secret. I am not

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Speaker 2: the daughter of a lover he wants to hide. Why

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Speaker 2: does my existence need to be hidden? My face cannot

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Speaker 2: be in the house where I lived. It sounds silly

295
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:38,680
Speaker 2: now because I used to feel happy seeing my photo there.

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Speaker 2: I felt special, thinking Dad has put me in his

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Speaker 2: office while he works. As I grew older, that feeling

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Speaker 2: disappeared and turned into something darker and more realistic. A

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Speaker 2: day after that message, I decided to talk to my

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Speaker 2: father and stepmother. My mother and Luigi offer to come

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Speaker 2: with me, but I chose to go alone. I told

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Speaker 2: my father I would not return to the house as

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Speaker 2: long as he ben married to her. I think my

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00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:06,320
Speaker 2: words affected him, because he apologized again and said he

305
00:15:06,400 --> 00:15:09,120
Speaker 2: loved me and that we could all go on vacation together.

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Speaker 2: I wanted to be the bigger person, but they are

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Speaker 2: the adults. I have been the bigger person since she arrived,

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Speaker 2: and I'm exhausted. I told my father I do not

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Speaker 2: want to go anywhere she is, even if he sets limits. Now,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to surround myself with that energy anymore.

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00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:29,080
Speaker 2: I think it's healthy to start setting boundaries. I have

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00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:32,680
Speaker 2: read comments from people over thirty five who still endure

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Speaker 2: cruel stepmothers just to see their fathers or siblings. I

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00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:39,440
Speaker 2: don't want that future. I do not want to spend

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Speaker 2: my adulthood, sharing dinners with a woman who hates me.

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Speaker 2: I am terrified of having children one day and them

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Speaker 2: having to call her grandma. I do not want to

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Speaker 2: pretend everything is fine.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not good for anybody.

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Speaker 2: I know. You shouldn't have to do that. Should be

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Speaker 2: around people that want you around.

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Speaker 3: Like you could get a fake mom though, like a

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Speaker 3: filling grandma.

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00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:03,400
Speaker 2: Well, he's got her actual her bio mom.

325
00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:07,200
Speaker 3: But you need like grandma on this side, grandma on

326
00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:09,360
Speaker 3: that side. You could get a fake grandma.

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Speaker 2: I feel like she's got her bio mom and then

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00:16:12,640 --> 00:16:14,840
Speaker 2: presumably her bio mom has a grand like a mother.

329
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:20,920
Speaker 3: Everyone deserves two grandmas. Well, Luigi, but Luigi's got a grandfather. Yeah,

330
00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:23,920
Speaker 3: but Luigi, I'm not talking about parents. I'm talking about whenever,

331
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Speaker 3: Oh he has a kid, that kid needs two grandparents.

332
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Speaker 3: I'm proposing getting a fake one or someone that's a

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00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:31,920
Speaker 3: close family friend, and that's considered grandma.

334
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Speaker 2: Wouldn't opee whoever they were with. They would also have

335
00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:39,240
Speaker 2: a mother that would become a grandparent.

336
00:16:39,480 --> 00:16:41,120
Speaker 3: Well because it's the step mom.

337
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:42,840
Speaker 2: Ye, but they don't need a step mom.

338
00:16:43,040 --> 00:16:45,240
Speaker 3: Well, it's like stepmom and biological dad. So we just

339
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:46,000
Speaker 3: get rid of that side.

340
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Speaker 2: We just get rid of that side.

341
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Speaker 3: Okay, Okay, I see what you're saying. I didn't think

342
00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:51,240
Speaker 3: of doubt that.

343
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Speaker 2: That's all right. Everyone deserves four grandparents. Yeah, my father

344
00:16:55,760 --> 00:16:58,320
Speaker 2: told me he cannot leave her because she's his wife

345
00:16:58,360 --> 00:17:03,880
Speaker 2: and the mother of his children. Man, your children, Yeah,

346
00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,840
Speaker 2: you seem to left her. I told him I understood,

347
00:17:06,920 --> 00:17:09,560
Speaker 2: and that is why I will not come back. He

348
00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:12,520
Speaker 2: saw something in her. If they have been together for years,

349
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:15,600
Speaker 2: in a way they deserve each other. One is cruel

350
00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:18,560
Speaker 2: and the other failed to protect me. We argued and

351
00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:22,080
Speaker 2: raised our voices, especially when she said I was always

352
00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:25,760
Speaker 2: problematic and needed too much of my father's attention. Their

353
00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:28,840
Speaker 2: true personalities came out when she said that spouse has

354
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:34,520
Speaker 2: come before children, and my father agreed. That's crazy. Really,

355
00:17:34,760 --> 00:17:40,160
Speaker 2: spouse has come before your kids. You can divorce your partner,

356
00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:42,360
Speaker 2: your kid has always gotta be your kid.

357
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:45,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. I get that.

358
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Speaker 2: That's kind of crazy to me.

359
00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:51,680
Speaker 3: Really, Yeah, that you would prioritize your spouse over your kids.

360
00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:56,920
Speaker 3: Absolutely in listenery, yes, but overall, I don't think.

361
00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:57,960
Speaker 2: I don't think like.

362
00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:00,840
Speaker 3: I disagree with that. I think like I would prioritize

363
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:05,959
Speaker 3: my spouse. So for my kids, what yeah, in what way? Okay,

364
00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:08,920
Speaker 3: the scenario I'm thinking about is day to day. Okay,

365
00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:12,000
Speaker 3: they want to do sports and they're all crazy like, oh,

366
00:18:12,119 --> 00:18:14,359
Speaker 3: like dad, I need to basketball practice he or Dad,

367
00:18:14,359 --> 00:18:16,800
Speaker 3: I need to go to this here day to day.

368
00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:19,480
Speaker 3: That's going to strain my relationship with my wife because

369
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:22,240
Speaker 3: I'm gonna have to be an uber driver for these kids. Thus,

370
00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:24,680
Speaker 3: I'm gonna be like guys, Mondays the only day you

371
00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:27,240
Speaker 3: guys can play basketball. What Well, like they could play

372
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:29,800
Speaker 3: on the weekends too, but like on practices on Mondays,

373
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:32,479
Speaker 3: you guys can do that. I mean you should, you should,

374
00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:33,000
Speaker 3: but I'm not.

375
00:18:33,119 --> 00:18:35,720
Speaker 2: I'm sure you have a good relationship with your partner

376
00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:37,720
Speaker 2: while you are raising kids.

377
00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:39,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I know like kids will be tough. But

378
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:41,440
Speaker 3: what I'm trying to say is I'm gonna make sure

379
00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:44,320
Speaker 3: they're good, they're well cap and everything like that. I'm

380
00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:47,360
Speaker 3: not over extend myself to my kids so I don't

381
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:48,439
Speaker 3: spend time with my partner.

382
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:49,879
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, you want to make sure you have a

383
00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:52,400
Speaker 2: good relationship, but I don't think that means your priority.

384
00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:52,919
Speaker 2: I don't know.

385
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:56,640
Speaker 3: I I mean we can have different opinions.

386
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:57,480
Speaker 2: I disagree.

387
00:18:57,720 --> 00:19:00,960
Speaker 3: It's okay, yeah, yeah, but the way that the dad's

388
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:02,760
Speaker 3: going about this is completely wrong.

389
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,600
Speaker 2: I could not help but compare that to my mother

390
00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,240
Speaker 2: and Luigi, who always put me in his son first.

391
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,200
Speaker 2: My mother always asked me if Luigi treated me well

392
00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:13,199
Speaker 2: when they were getting to know each other. But it

393
00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:16,160
Speaker 2: seems like you've got the people you need in your life.

394
00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:17,480
Speaker 2: That's all you need.

395
00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:20,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, Luigi's pulling some weight here.

396
00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:24,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, Luigi knows, he knows how to parent, he.

397
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:27,920
Speaker 3: Knows what uncondditional love is. Yeah, we love Luigi. Team

398
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:32,080
Speaker 3: Luigi Luchi is always my favorite super Mario bro of

399
00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:34,800
Speaker 3: the two. Yeah, yeah, I mean, come on, look at me.

400
00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:35,480
Speaker 2: That makes sense.

401
00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:36,080
Speaker 3: We're green.

402
00:19:36,560 --> 00:19:39,080
Speaker 2: He's got a mansion, does he Is that his mansion?

403
00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:42,359
Speaker 3: Luigi's Hanson mansion? Yeah? I never played it though.

404
00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:43,719
Speaker 2: Did he like buy the mansion?

405
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:46,800
Speaker 3: I think he's just exploring it, okay, kind of his premise.

406
00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:49,040
Speaker 2: In the end, I made it clear that as long

407
00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:51,399
Speaker 2: as they're married, I will never step foot in that

408
00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:54,359
Speaker 2: house again and will never be in the same place

409
00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:54,800
Speaker 2: as her.

410
00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:55,359
Speaker 3: Ooh.

411
00:19:55,840 --> 00:19:58,320
Speaker 2: I told my father I also need space from him.

412
00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:00,760
Speaker 2: He said he loves me, but I I'm tired of

413
00:20:00,760 --> 00:20:03,679
Speaker 2: that kind of love. I felt depressed for a few days,

414
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:06,800
Speaker 2: but today we finished decorating the house for Christmas, and

415
00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:10,119
Speaker 2: my mother's excitement rubbed off on me. Luigi went to

416
00:20:10,119 --> 00:20:12,679
Speaker 2: pick up a son, so tomorrow we will all be together.

417
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,840
Speaker 2: Maybe I let my stepmother win, but I think I'm

418
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:18,720
Speaker 2: winning too by not having her in my life. Top

419
00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:22,320
Speaker 2: comment commenter says, you did not let her win. You

420
00:20:22,440 --> 00:20:25,560
Speaker 2: won by standing up for yourself. Your dad is the

421
00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:29,280
Speaker 2: one who truly lost. You set boundaries, and he chose

422
00:20:29,320 --> 00:20:33,160
Speaker 2: to prioritize her over protecting his child. He may realize

423
00:20:33,160 --> 00:20:38,000
Speaker 2: it one day when he misses graduations, weddings and future grandchildren.

424
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:41,439
Speaker 2: Until then, he is only himself and heard a blame.

425
00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:43,720
Speaker 2: I'm glad you have Luigi in your life, and I

426
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:46,560
Speaker 2: wish you all the love and happiness you deserve. And

427
00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:48,240
Speaker 2: that is the end of the story.

428
00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:51,399
Speaker 3: Wow. Maybere gonna get a lot of heat for the

429
00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:54,040
Speaker 3: prioritizing your partner over your kids.

430
00:20:54,359 --> 00:20:57,480
Speaker 2: I think it's good to make sure that your relationship

431
00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:01,000
Speaker 2: is still strong while you are raising children. Hmm, But

432
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:04,560
Speaker 2: I don't think I would consider that prioritizing your children

433
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,560
Speaker 2: or your relationship with your children, because I think when

434
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:08,520
Speaker 2: you bring a child.

435
00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:11,040
Speaker 3: Into the world, you kind of know you're definitely responsible

436
00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:11,320
Speaker 3: for it.

437
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:15,159
Speaker 2: You got to make sure they're all good man stepparents.

438
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,680
Speaker 3: I never had one, nor did I. Yeah, I don't.

439
00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:19,439
Speaker 3: I don't really know.

440
00:21:20,160 --> 00:21:23,480
Speaker 2: Maybe we should go check out those those Facebook groups.

441
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:24,200
Speaker 3: You get some insight.

442
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:26,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I said on these stepmothers.

443
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 3: As anyone step parents, has anyone had a good step

444
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:31,600
Speaker 3: parent before?

445
00:21:31,840 --> 00:21:33,280
Speaker 2: I feel like we've had a lot of people in

446
00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:35,879
Speaker 2: our chats who have said they've had really good step parents.

447
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,159
Speaker 2: So let us know in the comments. But we've got

448
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,120
Speaker 2: another story coming right up.

449
00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:43,320
Speaker 3: I just found out I am pregnant while my eldest

450
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:45,000
Speaker 3: child is critically ill.

451
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:46,200
Speaker 2: Terrible timing.

452
00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:49,280
Speaker 3: I'm a woman in my thirties and just found out

453
00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:52,800
Speaker 3: I am pregnant. My eldest child is currently in an

454
00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:57,480
Speaker 3: induced koma do a post surgical complication after a plan procedure.

455
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:59,040
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, that's terrible.

456
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:01,919
Speaker 3: I'm praying for you. The timing is insane, and I

457
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:05,640
Speaker 3: feel like I'm experiencing a massive amount of emotions due

458
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:09,320
Speaker 3: to these conflicting situations. By the way, this comes from

459
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 3: critical Biscuit and if you want to speak your own stories,

460
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,320
Speaker 3: go to the rsage. Okay stories, I'm super at it.

461
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:17,840
Speaker 3: I'm Riley, I'm Sophia, and we're here to give good advice, ruefully,

462
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:21,840
Speaker 3: not medical advice like this story. But if you guys

463
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,480
Speaker 3: have any medical advice you could put in the chat,

464
00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:25,600
Speaker 3: please do or anything else you'd like to add. On

465
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:28,640
Speaker 3: one hand, I am terrified I will lose my child.

466
00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:31,560
Speaker 3: Their status is more stable today than it was a

467
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:36,560
Speaker 3: week ago, but their condition is still extremely serious. Doctors

468
00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:39,480
Speaker 3: are hopeful that they will make a full recovery. On

469
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:42,600
Speaker 3: the other hand, having more children as something we very

470
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,520
Speaker 3: much want as a family. We've been married for over

471
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:48,919
Speaker 3: ten years and already have a child as well. The

472
00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:53,720
Speaker 3: timing of this pregnancy is completely unexpected. I guess, yeah,

473
00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:56,520
Speaker 3: having a kid in your thirties, you already have one.

474
00:22:56,480 --> 00:22:58,239
Speaker 2: Well do I think? I think they said that they

475
00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:01,600
Speaker 2: have another child, yeah, having three? Yeah, so it's this

476
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:05,280
Speaker 2: third child and you have already, you know, one child

477
00:23:05,359 --> 00:23:09,000
Speaker 2: who is very ill. That is a lot to take in.

478
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:11,919
Speaker 3: You know, this might give some hope, Opie. I The

479
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:14,560
Speaker 3: type of stories I hear about this is when a

480
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,600
Speaker 3: woman goes up in church and is given like her

481
00:23:16,640 --> 00:23:19,800
Speaker 3: testimony or like something that has happened that's amazing, and

482
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:22,480
Speaker 3: they'll start with a hardship like this, Yeah, and it

483
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:24,200
Speaker 3: is beautifully Yeah, so I.

484
00:23:24,119 --> 00:23:25,600
Speaker 2: Feel like it's gonna end great for you.

485
00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:28,880
Speaker 3: I hope it's not looking so good right now.

486
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:29,720
Speaker 2: Yeah.

487
00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:32,399
Speaker 3: How can I feel happy when I also feel so

488
00:23:32,600 --> 00:23:35,960
Speaker 3: deeply sad and scared at the same time. Anyways, Happy

489
00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:38,600
Speaker 3: New Year. I'm just sharing this to the void. We

490
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:41,879
Speaker 3: have some comments. TJ. Klein O nine says, Oh, honey,

491
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:45,560
Speaker 3: I cannot imagine all the thoughts currently rolling around your head.

492
00:23:45,920 --> 00:23:49,000
Speaker 3: Do yourself a small favor, take a few deep breaths.

493
00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:51,080
Speaker 3: You are no good to yourself or any of your

494
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:55,199
Speaker 3: children if you're constantly in a frazzled state. Understand what

495
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:57,680
Speaker 3: is going on with your child is going to be

496
00:23:57,760 --> 00:24:00,080
Speaker 3: a day to day situation, but you need to take

497
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:03,439
Speaker 3: care of yourself as best as possible so you can

498
00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:06,720
Speaker 3: be present and healthy for the information that doctors need

499
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:09,520
Speaker 3: to give you. I know that sounds easier said than done,

500
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:12,800
Speaker 3: but having people come and visit you or bring you

501
00:24:12,840 --> 00:24:15,320
Speaker 3: snacks can really help. Are there people in your life

502
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 3: who can do that? Do you have people to talk to?

503
00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:22,520
Speaker 3: If not, hospitals usually have social workers who are excellent

504
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,720
Speaker 3: with these situations. Ask a nurse about having one come

505
00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:28,800
Speaker 3: to see you. Although I have never been in your position,

506
00:24:29,440 --> 00:24:31,760
Speaker 3: I have been through the same difficult things and had

507
00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:34,160
Speaker 3: to reach out for help. It is incredibly hard to do,

508
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:39,520
Speaker 3: but it is also incredibly important and often people want

509
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:42,760
Speaker 3: to truly help you. From another mom, Please know that

510
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:45,200
Speaker 3: you are doing the absolute best you can. Right now.

511
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:49,200
Speaker 3: Big Internet hugs if that's okay, edit big Internet hugs

512
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:52,240
Speaker 3: and not bugs. I am leaving it here because I

513
00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:53,160
Speaker 3: hope it makes you laugh.

514
00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:56,479
Speaker 2: Big Internet bugs. I hope they make you happy.

515
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:59,360
Speaker 3: The viruses, Yeah, now she has a virus on her

516
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:03,160
Speaker 3: had dang, He says, thank you for the laugh and

517
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,960
Speaker 3: the Internet hugs. Our friend group has really rallied around us,

518
00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:10,080
Speaker 3: as we do not have much family here. Our village

519
00:25:10,119 --> 00:25:13,160
Speaker 3: is small, but we are incredibly grateful for the support

520
00:25:13,440 --> 00:25:16,359
Speaker 3: we have received. The hospital also has been great about

521
00:25:16,359 --> 00:25:19,080
Speaker 3: offering support. It's not a great situation to be in,

522
00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:22,000
Speaker 3: but we are comforted by the kindness we have received.

523
00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:25,240
Speaker 3: Thank you again. Update eleven months later.

524
00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:28,080
Speaker 2: I think it's gonna be okay. I think OP right

525
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:33,640
Speaker 2: now is just feeling guilty for feeling happy and also scared.

526
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:35,760
Speaker 3: Which she's supposed to be in a season of like sadness.

527
00:25:35,840 --> 00:25:39,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know, I don't think that's a bad thing.

528
00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,119
Speaker 2: I but also there's not really much you can do about,

529
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:45,200
Speaker 2: Like people can tell you, oh, it's okay to feel

530
00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:48,360
Speaker 2: happy and scared at the same time, but uh, it's

531
00:25:48,359 --> 00:25:52,320
Speaker 2: still it's still confusing, mm hmm. But I think everything

532
00:25:52,359 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 2: will be okay.

533
00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:56,560
Speaker 3: My uncle got a really bad accident, a car accident

534
00:25:56,560 --> 00:25:59,320
Speaker 3: when I was ten, and like I think every week

535
00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:01,560
Speaker 3: or every few days we had to go. We had

536
00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:03,399
Speaker 3: to drive all the way down to Charlotte to see him,

537
00:26:03,640 --> 00:26:05,119
Speaker 3: and I always had a good time because there was

538
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:07,159
Speaker 3: like family there. We were playing cards and we were

539
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:08,119
Speaker 3: just hanging out with a family.

540
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:11,040
Speaker 2: Yeah. It's like having like fun at a funeral, you know,

541
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:13,239
Speaker 2: like you're having like a nice conversation with someone at

542
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:13,720
Speaker 2: a funeral.

543
00:26:13,840 --> 00:26:14,840
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, Oh I.

544
00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:17,840
Speaker 2: Should be somber. She's like a sad time. But you know,

545
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:20,840
Speaker 2: happiness can be found even in the darkest of places.

546
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:23,440
Speaker 3: So I posted on a page almost a year ago

547
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:26,439
Speaker 3: after founding out I was pregnant while my eldest child

548
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:29,360
Speaker 3: was in the ICU fighting for their life. I thought

549
00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:31,600
Speaker 3: it might be nice to share an update that is

550
00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:36,320
Speaker 3: actually very positive yay and truly a best outcome case.

551
00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:36,840
Speaker 2: Yay.

552
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:41,560
Speaker 3: After a fifty eight day hospital admission.

553
00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:43,920
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, that's crazy and I have to start

554
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:44,680
Speaker 2: paying rent there.

555
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:48,639
Speaker 3: My eldest child was able to come home. Her recovery

556
00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:52,280
Speaker 3: was long and had its challenges, but she's doing much

557
00:26:52,320 --> 00:26:55,280
Speaker 3: better now. After returning home, we had to switch her

558
00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:58,320
Speaker 3: care to a local children's hospital. They were able to

559
00:26:58,400 --> 00:27:01,840
Speaker 3: intervene and create a new medical plan for both short

560
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:05,040
Speaker 3: term and long term management of some of our chronic

561
00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:09,320
Speaker 3: health conditions. We feel incredibly supported now and confident that

562
00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:12,200
Speaker 3: we are in good hands with our new care team.

563
00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:15,879
Speaker 3: The overall experience was very traumatic for our family, but

564
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:20,800
Speaker 3: we received tremendous support from close friends, and thankfully we

565
00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:24,600
Speaker 3: got through it all together. Being newly pregnant while having

566
00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:28,800
Speaker 3: another child in critical condition was extremely difficult. The hormones

567
00:27:28,840 --> 00:27:31,800
Speaker 3: added to an already height an emotional state, and dealing

568
00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:35,359
Speaker 3: with symptoms like morning sickness while being away from home

569
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:39,879
Speaker 3: was not easy. Hospital food especially was awful with dealing

570
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:44,159
Speaker 3: with nausea and food aversions. Despite everything happening at the time,

571
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:48,480
Speaker 3: the baby did well, and yay, I had an otherwise

572
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:50,240
Speaker 3: unremarkable pregnancy.

573
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:53,400
Speaker 2: That's what you want. You want an unremarkable pregnancy when

574
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:54,560
Speaker 2: you got a lot going on.

575
00:27:55,040 --> 00:28:00,720
Speaker 3: The only unremarkable pregnancy I heard from my cousin. Yeah,

576
00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:02,960
Speaker 3: I have I told you about this. No, she had Emory.

577
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:05,280
Speaker 3: She said it was so easy. It happened in thirty

578
00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:08,399
Speaker 3: two minutes and she was able to like grab the

579
00:28:08,440 --> 00:28:09,000
Speaker 3: baby out.

580
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:12,040
Speaker 2: That feels remarkable to me that it's that quick.

581
00:28:12,240 --> 00:28:14,399
Speaker 3: Yeah, and that was that easy and she didn't have

582
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:15,080
Speaker 3: to push anything.

583
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:16,480
Speaker 2: I would remark on that.

584
00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:18,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, she had pictures and she showed it to my mom.

585
00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:20,240
Speaker 3: I was like, I do not want to see them.

586
00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:22,520
Speaker 3: Show me so you want to see the fun I'm

587
00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:23,359
Speaker 3: like no.

588
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:24,320
Speaker 2: Yeah.

589
00:28:24,440 --> 00:28:26,639
Speaker 3: She actually was like, don't look at these. But I

590
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:29,800
Speaker 3: was like, wild to me. I need to ask her

591
00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:32,000
Speaker 3: about Elsie if that was the same thing. I didn't

592
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:33,439
Speaker 3: even I don't even know if that was easier or

593
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:35,159
Speaker 3: not her other child.

594
00:28:35,640 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, you gotta find out.

595
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:38,600
Speaker 3: I'm gonna call her find out.

596
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:42,240
Speaker 2: Which pregnancy was remarkable or not. You know, we need

597
00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:42,640
Speaker 2: a list.

598
00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:45,920
Speaker 3: I end up having our third child in August. There's

599
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:48,400
Speaker 3: such a bundle of joy and have brought so much

600
00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:51,480
Speaker 3: happiness and love into her family. There was a point

601
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:54,120
Speaker 3: where I truly thought I might be losing one child

602
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:57,240
Speaker 3: while gaining another, and that was hard to imagine feel

603
00:28:57,240 --> 00:28:59,960
Speaker 3: happiness and grief at the same time. Thankfully that was

604
00:29:00,160 --> 00:29:02,880
Speaker 3: not the outcome. Now I can go into this holiday

605
00:29:02,880 --> 00:29:05,000
Speaker 3: season with my three beautiful children.

606
00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:06,160
Speaker 2: Yay.

607
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:09,360
Speaker 3: Last year we spent Christmas in the hospital. This year,

608
00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:12,240
Speaker 3: we are beyond excited to be home together. Thank you

609
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:15,520
Speaker 3: for reading, and I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday

610
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:17,000
Speaker 3: season and a happy New Year.

611
00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:22,920
Speaker 2: That's great. That was so sweetwee, Wow, you have three

612
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:26,720
Speaker 2: beautiful children and it's the holidays. It's great.

613
00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:29,600
Speaker 3: That is great. Yeah, nothing like that really happened to

614
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:32,640
Speaker 3: my family. Yeah, thankfully not.

615
00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:35,680
Speaker 2: To neither in mine to my knowledge. Wow.

616
00:29:35,800 --> 00:29:37,400
Speaker 3: If you guys have something you'd like to share that

617
00:29:37,440 --> 00:29:40,000
Speaker 3: could maybe help someone out or help yourself out to

618
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,000
Speaker 3: vent please coming down below. We'd love to hear it.

619
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:44,680
Speaker 2: But we've got another story and we're going to.

620
00:29:44,720 --> 00:29:47,560
Speaker 1: Get that ready, Sam, here og host, we're gonna get

621
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:49,719
Speaker 1: back to these stories. But here's three minutes fads from

622
00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:50,320
Speaker 1: our sponsors.

623
00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 2: First, my cousin expected me to accommodate her after copying

624
00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 2: my wedding date. Unexcptable No, And this comes directly from

625
00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:03,040
Speaker 2: the r slash O storytime subared it. I twenty three female.

626
00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:07,160
Speaker 2: I'm getting married next month to my amazing fiance, Dean

627
00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:10,640
Speaker 2: twenty two male. And we recently just bought and moved

628
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 2: into our own house a little over a month ago.

629
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:14,440
Speaker 3: O good congratulations.

630
00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:17,720
Speaker 2: Yeah in this economy, yeah twenty two. By the way,

631
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:20,240
Speaker 2: this comes from Drama Mama for and if you want

632
00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:22,000
Speaker 2: to smit your own stories, go to the r slash

633
00:30:22,080 --> 00:30:25,560
Speaker 2: Okay storytime subred it. I'm Sophia, I'm Riley, and we're

634
00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:27,320
Speaker 2: here to give good advice Youofley, but we don't have

635
00:30:27,360 --> 00:30:29,560
Speaker 2: all the answers. We only know what we'd do, So

636
00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:31,200
Speaker 2: let us know what you would do in the comments

637
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:35,520
Speaker 2: and op says background. My dad is the middle of

638
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:38,479
Speaker 2: three brothers. This is more concerning the youngest brother and

639
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:41,400
Speaker 2: his family. He's the only brother still married and has

640
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:43,800
Speaker 2: four kids, two of which are right at my age.

641
00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:47,680
Speaker 2: His daughter's Hannah twenty two female, the oldest, and then

642
00:30:47,760 --> 00:30:51,280
Speaker 2: Murphy twenty female, the second oldest, have never gotten along

643
00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:53,800
Speaker 2: with me anytime I try to talk to them at

644
00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:56,520
Speaker 2: any family event. No matter what I say. It could

645
00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:58,800
Speaker 2: be about the weather, and they would laugh at whatever

646
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 2: I said and then walk away, And honestly felt like

647
00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:04,400
Speaker 2: I was a laughingstock no matter what I said, for

648
00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:07,280
Speaker 2: no reason, because all I did was open my mouth

649
00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:10,440
Speaker 2: to speak. They told me several times growing up, you

650
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:13,280
Speaker 2: think you're better than a's because you went to public school.

651
00:31:13,760 --> 00:31:15,560
Speaker 2: They were homeschooled by their mom.

652
00:31:15,920 --> 00:31:18,840
Speaker 3: Ah, I see, then, yeah, yeah we are.

653
00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:24,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, sorry, Baddy. Here's the thing I never said or

654
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:27,320
Speaker 2: thought that ever. Yeah, they just feel insecure because they were.

655
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:30,040
Speaker 3: Homeschool They know that every homeschooler knows that feeling.

656
00:31:30,280 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 2: Both of my parents raised me and my younger sister

657
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:36,480
Speaker 2: eighteen female to have a focus on family and doing

658
00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:39,200
Speaker 2: what you can for others, even if it's not much.

659
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:42,320
Speaker 2: I've always been family oriented, but these two never came

660
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 2: to any family events, and when they did, they would

661
00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:48,520
Speaker 2: complain about being there and or leave early. Mind you,

662
00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:51,720
Speaker 2: they all six live with my grandma in her house

663
00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:55,080
Speaker 2: and the events were mostly always at her house, so

664
00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:58,120
Speaker 2: it made it even more uncomfortable for everyone. We have

665
00:31:58,200 --> 00:32:01,200
Speaker 2: a big extended family on that side that is very

666
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:04,320
Speaker 2: close knit and do events throughout the year. They never

667
00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:07,040
Speaker 2: see Hannah and Murphy, but our dad and us went

668
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:10,080
Speaker 2: to every single one and help with planning and anything else.

669
00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:13,800
Speaker 2: I mostly helped tend to the older generation and cooking

670
00:32:14,160 --> 00:32:18,440
Speaker 2: onto the actual situation hand, because that's honestly usually something

671
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:21,840
Speaker 2: I could ignore. But now things have escalated and I

672
00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:25,640
Speaker 2: feel like I need to protect myself and distance myself,

673
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:29,280
Speaker 2: and it sucks because it's family. I got engaged December

674
00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:32,920
Speaker 2: twenty twenty four, and by beginning of February we already

675
00:32:32,960 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 2: had our date ven you and all big vendors dealt with.

676
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:39,280
Speaker 2: I'm very type A when it comes to deadlines, and

677
00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:42,040
Speaker 2: I know weddings need advanced planning, so I did that

678
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:44,360
Speaker 2: to make sure we didn't have to worry about it.

679
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:47,680
Speaker 2: Because my fiance was finishing up his schooling. He graduated

680
00:32:47,760 --> 00:32:51,560
Speaker 2: top of his class this past May. Ordulations, because of

681
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:54,920
Speaker 2: the lack of closeness to my immediate cousins Hannah and Murphy,

682
00:32:55,440 --> 00:32:58,040
Speaker 2: I ended up asking my second cousin, Jia to be

683
00:32:58,120 --> 00:33:01,240
Speaker 2: in my wedding as a bridesmaid. Jugia and her brother

684
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:03,480
Speaker 2: grew up with us and hanging out more than any

685
00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:06,400
Speaker 2: of us did with other cousins, but for some reason

686
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:09,360
Speaker 2: Murphy believes they're closer when they don't even speak. From

687
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:11,320
Speaker 2: what I'm aware of from Gia.

688
00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 3: What how does that work? Like we're closer people whenever

689
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:16,920
Speaker 3: we don't speak to each other. How does that work?

690
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:17,719
Speaker 3: I don't know.

691
00:33:17,920 --> 00:33:20,640
Speaker 2: This is weird. I had my sister, a cousin from

692
00:33:20,680 --> 00:33:23,920
Speaker 2: each of my parents' sides, and then two of his cousins.

693
00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:27,000
Speaker 2: He has six friends and his brother for his groom's party.

694
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,800
Speaker 2: We asked our people in March. So we get to

695
00:33:29,840 --> 00:33:32,480
Speaker 2: the past Easter and the youngest uncle tries to take

696
00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:35,480
Speaker 2: charge of the family get together. But mind you, the

697
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:38,360
Speaker 2: event is at my dad's house, who lives on a lake.

698
00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:41,200
Speaker 2: My uncle showed up and mowed the grass the morning up.

699
00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:45,240
Speaker 2: Seems good. What was that you issue there?

700
00:33:45,600 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 3: Thank you for mowing my grass?

701
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:47,720
Speaker 2: Yeah?

702
00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:49,200
Speaker 3: I think he's showing to start dominance.

703
00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:52,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, he said, this is my grass, I'm gonna mow

704
00:33:52,400 --> 00:33:56,560
Speaker 2: it all for you. And Opie's dad is like, okay, some.

705
00:33:56,480 --> 00:33:59,600
Speaker 3: People are worried about that. Did you know that? Like,

706
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 3: don't I am on my grass?

707
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 2: I did not know that.

708
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the thing. We don't have a grass lawn,

709
00:34:05,240 --> 00:34:07,960
Speaker 3: so yeah we do, but we have someone else to

710
00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:08,160
Speaker 3: do it.

711
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:10,600
Speaker 2: No, I meant at my parents' house. I didn't think

712
00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:12,799
Speaker 2: about this one. We've got like a.

713
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:13,920
Speaker 3: Like a patch of grass.

714
00:34:14,200 --> 00:34:16,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess I'm on the back. But we also

715
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:19,400
Speaker 2: have gardeners. So did we still have gardeners? I don't know.

716
00:34:19,480 --> 00:34:23,360
Speaker 2: We might not have gardeners anymore. Anyway, we may or

717
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:27,520
Speaker 2: maybe it's well, we used to. But then the people

718
00:34:27,520 --> 00:34:31,400
Speaker 2: that we worked with before broke our glass door twice.

719
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:35,600
Speaker 2: Why not intentionally, but they kicked up a rock the

720
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:37,680
Speaker 2: first time and shattered the door, and then we had

721
00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:40,640
Speaker 2: to buy a new one. And then literally a month later,

722
00:34:40,719 --> 00:34:43,120
Speaker 2: I was sitting in there and they did the same

723
00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:44,920
Speaker 2: thing and shattered the new glass door.

724
00:34:45,040 --> 00:34:45,600
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

725
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:49,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I don't know. I don't know if we

726
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:52,080
Speaker 2: still have gardeners or not. Anyway, Sorry, how old were

727
00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:53,719
Speaker 2: you in this urbn This was like a couple of

728
00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:54,120
Speaker 2: years ago.

729
00:34:54,280 --> 00:34:58,279
Speaker 3: I hope you're a teenager. No, sorry, anyways, hey's John Oghist.

730
00:34:58,280 --> 00:34:59,759
Speaker 1: We don't get back to the stories, but a quick

731
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:00,960
Speaker 1: free In a break of ads from our.

732
00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:04,080
Speaker 2: Sponsors, they kept making comments about how Murphy was about

733
00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:07,000
Speaker 2: to get proposed to. Well. I told my dad things

734
00:35:07,040 --> 00:35:10,000
Speaker 2: weren't adding up and lo and behold. They had actually

735
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:14,520
Speaker 2: planned a surprise engagement party for Murphy at my dad's house,

736
00:35:14,520 --> 00:35:17,480
Speaker 2: who had no idea there were like forty to fifty

737
00:35:17,520 --> 00:35:20,040
Speaker 2: people there, which they asked my dad if my cousin

738
00:35:20,080 --> 00:35:22,280
Speaker 2: could have two to three friends come with me because

739
00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:25,400
Speaker 2: they were still celebrating, and before we could even understand

740
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:28,200
Speaker 2: about the engagement party and not having an Easter, my

741
00:35:28,239 --> 00:35:30,600
Speaker 2: aunt decides to look at me and say, well, it

742
00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:33,320
Speaker 2: looks like we got the first celebration at your dad's

743
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:37,440
Speaker 2: great new place. The woman smirked at me, what is that.

744
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:39,320
Speaker 2: I don't know. This feels like a small issue.

745
00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:39,759
Speaker 3: Mm hm.

746
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:42,600
Speaker 2: I guess she's just trying to assert dominance as well,

747
00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:45,799
Speaker 2: say well we got here first. You can think, yeah, thing,

748
00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:48,040
Speaker 2: it doesn't really matter. You can have the first thing.

749
00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:50,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I have fun with it. I guess we'll have

750
00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 3: the last.

751
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:54,560
Speaker 2: Hopefully not last. I'd be sad. Also, I want to

752
00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:56,840
Speaker 2: note our dad told them Eastern needs to be before

753
00:35:56,880 --> 00:35:59,399
Speaker 2: four pm because I had to leave to get my mom,

754
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:01,799
Speaker 2: who was on a cruise for her spring break. She's

755
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:04,760
Speaker 2: a teacher, which is okay because we usually do holidays

756
00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:07,200
Speaker 2: at like twelve to one pm. They didn't show up

757
00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:10,120
Speaker 2: until I was leaving, so it felt intentional that they

758
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:13,480
Speaker 2: didn't want me there, which is okay because I left anyways.

759
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:17,120
Speaker 2: But my sister stayed because she's still switching between parents,

760
00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:20,760
Speaker 2: and she said they made her feel unwanted there as well. Also,

761
00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 2: before I left, they made a comment about how I

762
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,600
Speaker 2: was wearing a white T shirt and then Sarah was

763
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:28,160
Speaker 2: in her bathing suit. We were supposed to be tubing

764
00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:30,640
Speaker 2: and swimming with family for Easter, and I didn't know

765
00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:33,680
Speaker 2: it was an engagement party. So sorry I wore white

766
00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:37,959
Speaker 2: when our entire family, including oldest uncle, didn't know about

767
00:36:38,000 --> 00:36:41,360
Speaker 2: the engagement party. Yeah, they're like, how dare you.

768
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:43,920
Speaker 3: If she would have known? Yes, this is wild.

769
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:48,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can't expect someone to know your secret dress code.

770
00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:52,600
Speaker 2: That's fine, it's their party. Let them celebrate my cousin Murphy.

771
00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:55,480
Speaker 2: I was genuinely happy for her because I know we

772
00:36:55,640 --> 00:36:58,520
Speaker 2: just weren't close growing up. So it is what it is.

773
00:36:58,560 --> 00:37:01,239
Speaker 2: But I'm still happy for her. But here's the fun part.

774
00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:03,720
Speaker 2: A month later, I'm taking our grandma to the doctor

775
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:06,360
Speaker 2: for a checkup, and on the way home, she decides

776
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:10,400
Speaker 2: to drop what I call the atomic bomb. Oh, she

777
00:37:10,520 --> 00:37:13,319
Speaker 2: tells me, Murphy has set her wedding date and it's

778
00:37:13,400 --> 00:37:18,120
Speaker 2: two weeks before mine, and she's looking at my venue.

779
00:37:18,239 --> 00:37:20,759
Speaker 2: What the heck? So the aunt did the thing with

780
00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:23,400
Speaker 2: your dad's plays and was like, well, we got the

781
00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:27,520
Speaker 2: place first, ah, and your uncle's mowed the lawn or whatever,

782
00:37:28,120 --> 00:37:30,800
Speaker 2: and your cousin Murphy's trying to steal your wedding venue.

783
00:37:31,239 --> 00:37:32,520
Speaker 3: Why is this a competition?

784
00:37:32,840 --> 00:37:33,600
Speaker 2: It's so weird.

785
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:35,000
Speaker 3: I thought we were family.

786
00:37:35,520 --> 00:37:38,000
Speaker 2: I guess not. I had just ordered all of my

787
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:40,759
Speaker 2: save the dates and got my addresses and guest lists

788
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:44,920
Speaker 2: sorted out, and with divorced parents, it's already hard. And

789
00:37:44,960 --> 00:37:47,560
Speaker 2: then my fiance and I both just have huge families.

790
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:50,400
Speaker 2: Plus there's the etiquette in the family of who you

791
00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:52,919
Speaker 2: have to invite, which I don't mind because I love

792
00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:56,040
Speaker 2: my extended family because we see each other so often

793
00:37:56,080 --> 00:37:58,480
Speaker 2: and I care for them, but it does dwindle down

794
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:01,600
Speaker 2: who I can invite personally, my friends and people in

795
00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:05,359
Speaker 2: my life that's not extended. Our grandmother proceeded to tell

796
00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:08,000
Speaker 2: me who I'm allowed to invite and not, and it

797
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:11,480
Speaker 2: was basically her listing every family member from my dad's side,

798
00:38:11,800 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 2: as I don't need to invite because it'll be hard

799
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:17,960
Speaker 2: to go to two weddings that close and there's holiday season.

800
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:21,000
Speaker 2: Mind you, Murphy doesn't speak to any of them, and

801
00:38:21,040 --> 00:38:23,960
Speaker 2: she doesn't come to anything, and when she does, she

802
00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:26,480
Speaker 2: doesn't speak to anyone but her sister and her husband.

803
00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:28,799
Speaker 2: So why would they even go to her wedding? Why

804
00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:31,160
Speaker 2: is this grandma trying to control everything? I think you

805
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,360
Speaker 2: just invite who you invite because you had it first,

806
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:36,080
Speaker 2: and whoever comes comes. Can you leave it at that?

807
00:38:36,480 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 3: It is very strategic. Why they did it two weeks

808
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:40,839
Speaker 3: after because.

809
00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:42,840
Speaker 2: Or two weeks before.

810
00:38:42,800 --> 00:38:45,240
Speaker 3: Or two yeah, sorry, two weeks before the wedding because

811
00:38:45,360 --> 00:38:47,000
Speaker 3: going to another wedding two weeks after?

812
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:47,640
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.

813
00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:51,280
Speaker 3: You get to buy plane tickets, hotels. It's not fun.

814
00:38:51,320 --> 00:38:53,600
Speaker 3: You don't want to do that back to back.

815
00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:57,360
Speaker 2: No, I don't know why she's doing a topee so strange.

816
00:38:58,080 --> 00:39:01,600
Speaker 3: What it seems like from what I've gotten, Opie's dad

817
00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:04,080
Speaker 3: and Opie's dad's brother, your uncle. The dad and uncle

818
00:39:04,400 --> 00:39:08,279
Speaker 3: had this weird competition thing going on, and it's very

819
00:39:08,320 --> 00:39:10,759
Speaker 3: passive aggressive. It may have seeped down and this is

820
00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 3: their way of saying they're better.

821
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:14,600
Speaker 2: The uncle has passed it on to his daughter.

822
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:17,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, because the kids earlier were like, Oh, you think

823
00:39:17,080 --> 00:39:18,800
Speaker 3: you're better than us because you're publisher.

824
00:39:18,920 --> 00:39:22,160
Speaker 2: Yeah. True, I think they're all. I think they've just

825
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:25,719
Speaker 2: been like this competition has been ingrained in them, and

826
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:29,040
Speaker 2: Opie's just kind of there thinking, what.

827
00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:30,359
Speaker 3: Why are we doing this?

828
00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:33,560
Speaker 2: What why are we fighting? I called my dad and

829
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:36,359
Speaker 2: told him what happened after I dropped her off. He

830
00:39:36,480 --> 00:39:39,239
Speaker 2: was furious and went straight to his brother and they

831
00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:42,240
Speaker 2: had an argument. So this whole year has been hectic

832
00:39:42,280 --> 00:39:44,760
Speaker 2: because they even made us sit down together to finish

833
00:39:44,760 --> 00:39:48,000
Speaker 2: the argument for them. This is what Murphy told me

834
00:39:48,080 --> 00:39:50,600
Speaker 2: when we met at Starbucks. She can only pick that

835
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:52,920
Speaker 2: date because she doesn't want to wait six more months

836
00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:56,040
Speaker 2: to move in because she asked to be married first, okay,

837
00:39:56,160 --> 00:39:58,439
Speaker 2: and her school friends from out of state said that's

838
00:39:58,480 --> 00:40:02,439
Speaker 2: the best option for them. My dad should have known

839
00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:04,880
Speaker 2: better and was supposed to tell me I'm not allowed

840
00:40:04,920 --> 00:40:07,800
Speaker 2: to get married in that month because she's always planned

841
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:10,200
Speaker 2: to do that herself. Mind you, all, my craft was

842
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:13,560
Speaker 2: figured out two months before she even got engaged. Tells

843
00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:16,840
Speaker 2: me she's envious of my relationships with our extended family

844
00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:19,680
Speaker 2: because it already got around to the extended family, and

845
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:22,400
Speaker 2: they told her and her parents off. From what I heard,

846
00:40:22,800 --> 00:40:25,640
Speaker 2: I also learned that when our dad spoke, they came

847
00:40:25,680 --> 00:40:28,200
Speaker 2: to an agreement that Murphy was not allowed to invite

848
00:40:28,239 --> 00:40:32,480
Speaker 2: specific family members, if not most, to her wedding because

849
00:40:32,520 --> 00:40:35,080
Speaker 2: they were already committed to mine. And they don't even

850
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:38,399
Speaker 2: speak to her dad or her ever, and apparently their

851
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:41,640
Speaker 2: whole generation is in agreement. What happened was messed up

852
00:40:41,680 --> 00:40:44,000
Speaker 2: to do. At least everyone's on your side.

853
00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:46,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's that makes it easier because I.

854
00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:48,279
Speaker 2: Feel like we read a lot of stories where these

855
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:51,920
Speaker 2: people are, you know, either are telling you that you're

856
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 2: overacting or would go to like Murphy's weddings. Yes, right,

857
00:40:56,480 --> 00:40:59,480
Speaker 2: it's good that you're not in those stories. Oh. I

858
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 2: was made to feel like I needed to cancel and

859
00:41:02,239 --> 00:41:04,840
Speaker 2: give her that time because I'm usually the one to

860
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:07,560
Speaker 2: drop my own and do for the family, because that's

861
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:10,000
Speaker 2: what I've always done. But my dad told me no,

862
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:12,879
Speaker 2: and that I had mine planned out and I did

863
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:15,759
Speaker 2: all the hard work already, and plus my save the

864
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:18,279
Speaker 2: dates were already out. But after that, I spoke to

865
00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:20,920
Speaker 2: my fiance and we agreed to remove Murphy from the

866
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:23,480
Speaker 2: guest list for a wedding because with how this year

867
00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:25,799
Speaker 2: is gone with the family drama, we do not want

868
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:26,720
Speaker 2: that at our wedding.

869
00:41:26,920 --> 00:41:29,840
Speaker 3: In a way. They cause the drama, they're responsible for it.

870
00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,960
Speaker 2: Who Murphy, Yeah yeah, I mean she's already creating drama,

871
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:36,600
Speaker 2: so obviously you don't want to bring that into your wedding.

872
00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:38,920
Speaker 2: Plus I have a feeling she'll wear white because I

873
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,440
Speaker 2: didn't know and did so at her engagement party.

874
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:43,399
Speaker 3: The Ultimate Cardinal Sin.

875
00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:46,479
Speaker 2: Yeah. Op invites her to the wedding and she shows

876
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:49,600
Speaker 2: up in a wedding dress and she's like, well, I just,

877
00:41:49,880 --> 00:41:51,640
Speaker 2: oh my god, I didn't even know it was your

878
00:41:51,640 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 2: wedding day.

879
00:41:52,880 --> 00:41:55,680
Speaker 3: An even now, I must have got the dates confused.

880
00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:59,480
Speaker 2: I haven't seen Murphy since our conversation either any family

881
00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:02,279
Speaker 2: event I've had since, way less than we usually have

882
00:42:02,360 --> 00:42:05,240
Speaker 2: each year. But I have seen Hannah and their parents.

883
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:08,120
Speaker 2: Hannah keeps coming up to relatives I'm speaking to and

884
00:42:08,120 --> 00:42:11,120
Speaker 2: gets them to stop speaking to me to have a

885
00:42:11,120 --> 00:42:13,160
Speaker 2: conversation with her. That's so weird.

886
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:14,520
Speaker 3: That is super weird.

887
00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:18,000
Speaker 2: Why is everyone just letting that slide? What? And as

888
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:20,760
Speaker 2: for their parents, they keep questioning me and my dad

889
00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:24,480
Speaker 2: about information on my wedding and so far we've had

890
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:27,800
Speaker 2: some issues, but nothing too big because I keep big

891
00:42:27,880 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 2: or important things about the wedding to trust myself and

892
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:34,160
Speaker 2: my mom and my fiance's mom due to my cousin's drama.

893
00:42:34,600 --> 00:42:37,399
Speaker 2: Now it's Christmas time and here's the issue. I'm not

894
00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 2: going to my dad's side stuff anymore due to them

895
00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:43,240
Speaker 2: causing issues and making me feel crappy for their actions.

896
00:42:43,560 --> 00:42:45,719
Speaker 2: My dad and I got into it last night about it,

897
00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:48,640
Speaker 2: because yes, I did let things go, but I've been

898
00:42:48,680 --> 00:42:52,240
Speaker 2: in therapy due to my parents' divorce and being parentified,

899
00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:55,080
Speaker 2: and I'm working on boundaries and learning to stick to

900
00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:56,440
Speaker 2: them and protect my peace.

901
00:42:56,560 --> 00:42:58,040
Speaker 3: There you go, that's that's big.

902
00:42:58,080 --> 00:43:01,719
Speaker 2: That's what you need to do or saying this year.

903
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:04,520
Speaker 2: If someone doesn't like me, me for who I am

904
00:43:04,680 --> 00:43:06,920
Speaker 2: or me in general, I'm not going to force it

905
00:43:07,040 --> 00:43:09,000
Speaker 2: or be around it because I am who I am.

906
00:43:09,400 --> 00:43:11,799
Speaker 2: I would apologize for being myself and I actually just

907
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:13,440
Speaker 2: had to learn who I was on my own as

908
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:17,239
Speaker 2: a person, and therapy is great. So I was just

909
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:19,600
Speaker 2: able to talk to my dad about it and tell

910
00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:22,160
Speaker 2: him I'm not going on Sunday to his side to

911
00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:24,879
Speaker 2: the family Christmas. Well, he beat me to it by

912
00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:27,719
Speaker 2: asking if I wasn't planning on it. I actually was

913
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:29,919
Speaker 2: in the process of getting more hours at my part

914
00:43:29,920 --> 00:43:33,760
Speaker 2: time job instead, so I actually had a valid excuse

915
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:36,239
Speaker 2: because I would rather make money than be made to

916
00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:40,279
Speaker 2: feel that uncomfortable again, because Murphy had recently texted me

917
00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:43,000
Speaker 2: and I didn't respond because she's trying to ask if

918
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:46,200
Speaker 2: she's invited to the wedding, which my dad said he

919
00:43:46,239 --> 00:43:49,160
Speaker 2: would handle because I wasn't trying to let it be

920
00:43:49,239 --> 00:43:51,759
Speaker 2: spun that I'm the one and the wrong. Plus he

921
00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:54,919
Speaker 2: had to talk to his brother anyways about me rsvping

922
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:59,239
Speaker 2: nod to hers. Yeah, two weeks before Op's wedding. Of

923
00:43:59,239 --> 00:44:01,960
Speaker 2: course she's GONNASVP not doesn't have time.

924
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:04,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, and Op he had all her stuff figured out

925
00:44:04,800 --> 00:44:08,880
Speaker 3: two years ago, well two months before. Oh yeah, Murphy

926
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:13,560
Speaker 3: like even was engaged. Yeah, and two years ago. It's

927
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:15,920
Speaker 3: in the making. This is the wedding of the year everyone.

928
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:18,560
Speaker 2: So I told my dad I was working because he

929
00:44:18,719 --> 00:44:20,720
Speaker 2: just wanted me to give in when I had already

930
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:23,239
Speaker 2: told him that my fiance and I are inviting my

931
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:27,760
Speaker 2: parents and grandparents together to our house for breakfast Christmas

932
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:30,480
Speaker 2: Day because I'll still get to see our grandmother and

933
00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:33,480
Speaker 2: my dad that way for Christmas, just without the drama,

934
00:44:33,680 --> 00:44:37,560
Speaker 2: because his oldest brother loves to start drama by making

935
00:44:37,600 --> 00:44:40,480
Speaker 2: comments to get the arguments flowing. He's a sixty year

936
00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:43,880
Speaker 2: old bachelor who loves the spa and has an on

937
00:44:43,920 --> 00:44:47,440
Speaker 2: and off again girlfriend who's half his age with kids

938
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:50,840
Speaker 2: not his, but he does have two grown who moved

939
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:53,440
Speaker 2: out of state with their families just to paint the

940
00:44:53,560 --> 00:44:56,400
Speaker 2: image of my uncle. He got upset with me about it,

941
00:44:56,440 --> 00:44:58,960
Speaker 2: and I told him I'm not gonna be forced about

942
00:44:58,960 --> 00:45:01,440
Speaker 2: people who don't like me, because I am who I

943
00:45:01,480 --> 00:45:03,840
Speaker 2: am and I have no idea what I've done for

944
00:45:03,880 --> 00:45:07,000
Speaker 2: them to hate me this much. Not only that, the

945
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:09,640
Speaker 2: man has had his own drama with the wedding by

946
00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:13,120
Speaker 2: always adding people, even now when right before the final

947
00:45:13,160 --> 00:45:15,480
Speaker 2: numbers are due to the vendors, he wants to add

948
00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:18,239
Speaker 2: people and he doesn't know how quick they add up either,

949
00:45:18,840 --> 00:45:21,360
Speaker 2: but that's a story for another day. At the end

950
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:24,400
Speaker 2: of the argument, he said something about, well, but I

951
00:45:24,440 --> 00:45:26,160
Speaker 2: get it for this year, but we'll have to work

952
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:26,799
Speaker 2: on next year.

953
00:45:27,160 --> 00:45:29,120
Speaker 3: What dude, we're on?

954
00:45:29,320 --> 00:45:30,080
Speaker 2: What next year?

955
00:45:30,200 --> 00:45:31,600
Speaker 3: Why are you being so weird?

956
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:35,000
Speaker 2: What? Like? Are you gonna have another wedding. Are you

957
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:37,480
Speaker 2: gona have wedding two point zero? But here's the thing.

958
00:45:37,840 --> 00:45:40,920
Speaker 2: We're all grown and getting married and have our own lives,

959
00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:43,160
Speaker 2: so I think it's best we don't do his sides

960
00:45:43,239 --> 00:45:46,520
Speaker 2: Christmas anymore, and we start the tradition for the breakfast,

961
00:45:46,719 --> 00:45:49,640
Speaker 2: or we can split it between my parents and their

962
00:45:49,680 --> 00:45:54,040
Speaker 2: respected grandparents at their house if they get partners because

963
00:45:54,120 --> 00:45:57,760
Speaker 2: they are divorced after all, I just wanted one altogether

964
00:45:57,840 --> 00:45:59,960
Speaker 2: because of all the changes coming up in our lives

965
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:03,120
Speaker 2: and the figuring out is difficult, So I just wanted

966
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:06,600
Speaker 2: one all together because I've ran all over the place

967
00:46:06,640 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 2: this year due to the divorce. We need to just

968
00:46:09,320 --> 00:46:12,280
Speaker 2: do our own extended and not worry about his brothers

969
00:46:12,320 --> 00:46:15,360
Speaker 2: and their kids anymore because now we have my in laws,

970
00:46:15,440 --> 00:46:17,960
Speaker 2: and then when we have kids, I'm definitely not going

971
00:46:17,960 --> 00:46:20,640
Speaker 2: to be in that environment. And with kids comes new

972
00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:24,480
Speaker 2: traditions for new generations. So long story short, am I

973
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:27,640
Speaker 2: overreacting for wanting to no longer do extended holidays with

974
00:46:27,719 --> 00:46:31,360
Speaker 2: my first cousins and start doing it with just my parents'

975
00:46:31,400 --> 00:46:35,080
Speaker 2: grandparents since I'm starting a new chapter in my life,

976
00:46:35,239 --> 00:46:37,319
Speaker 2: less I see not long into the future for us,

977
00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:40,120
Speaker 2: and that is the end of the story.

978
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:44,359
Speaker 3: Protect your piece, Protect your piece. It sounds like these

979
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:46,400
Speaker 3: guys are coming after it for no good reason, just

980
00:46:46,440 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 3: because they're a little jealous about their brother, don't. She's

981
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:50,440
Speaker 3: pretty sorry.

982
00:46:51,040 --> 00:46:53,919
Speaker 2: No, it does. And it seems like it's something that's

983
00:46:53,960 --> 00:46:57,360
Speaker 2: been passed down and they're mimicking from their dads. So

984
00:46:57,680 --> 00:46:59,839
Speaker 2: I think you just don't give them the time of day.

985
00:47:00,160 --> 00:47:03,799
Speaker 3: Don't do that, and yeah, good job, op. Let's see

986
00:47:03,800 --> 00:47:04,719
Speaker 3: in that story.

987
00:47:04,640 --> 00:47:07,000
Speaker 2: And the end of the episode. So if you love us,

988
00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:07,960
Speaker 2: make sure to subscribe.

989
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,200
Speaker 3: We love you and see you tomorrow.