Speaker 1: I'm Honey German. My parents are Dominican. I was born
Speaker 1: and raised in New York City. I love sneakers and
Speaker 1: I'm a body positive advocate.
Speaker 2: I'm Carolina Bermudez Sonika wins it. But I was born
Speaker 2: and raised in Ohio. I'm a wife, a mama, and
Speaker 2: a worker bee.
Speaker 1: This is life in spanglish Carolina. I am about all
Speaker 1: things with the word honey, right, honey.
Speaker 2: Yeah, honey.
Speaker 1: I use honey pot to watch my koochie.
Speaker 2: Wait, wait, hold up, pulled up. Wait, A lot of
Speaker 2: people don't know about this. You use honeypot too? Do
Speaker 2: you use the sensitive? Do you use the watch one
Speaker 2: I use?
Speaker 1: I use the sensitive one, the one with the blue label.
Speaker 1: I don't like sense. And you know Macha has to
Speaker 1: be treated very nicely. But which one do you use?
Speaker 2: Girl?
Speaker 1: I feel like I use the honey yeah, and.
Speaker 2: Then I use the orange wipes. And I love the
Speaker 2: honey pop pantyliners. I mean, we need to get them
Speaker 2: on because this is what I said.
Speaker 1: I'm sending this to the salespeople. But anything honey catches
Speaker 1: my eye, whether it be saved, the honeys, honey jack,
Speaker 1: whatever it is. And lately I've been seeing baby honey
Speaker 1: and lately I've been seeing this thing called honey fund
Speaker 1: ooh oh, is.
Speaker 2: This the wedding thing. It's like it's a registry.
Speaker 1: It's a honeymoon registry. It's like an alternative to registering
Speaker 1: for glassware at William's Sonoma. And I am loving this, Caroline.
Speaker 1: I am one hundred percent here for this.
Speaker 2: We need Okay. So lan're saying, is this has come
Speaker 2: up a lot recently because it's wedding season, and normally
Speaker 2: people say, like when does wedding season start? Well, for me,
Speaker 2: wedding season is all year round. I don't think that
Speaker 2: there's because you know, there are some people who dream
Speaker 2: of like a winter wedding. There are some people who
Speaker 2: dream of like you know, June is like the most
Speaker 2: popular for brides. Anyway, it's this trend that is happening
Speaker 2: that has people either all in or all out. So
Speaker 2: the honey fund is when a couple gets together and
Speaker 2: instead of giving you the option to buy them things
Speaker 2: off of their registry, they say, we would like for
Speaker 2: you to contribute to our honeymoon. So instead of giving
Speaker 2: them like a check or money, you just go online.
Speaker 2: You look up their honey fund, and you can contribute
Speaker 2: like whatever amount of money that you would have given
Speaker 2: them for their wedding to the honey fund.
Speaker 1: So this is pretty much go fund me but for honeymoons.
Speaker 2: Ooh yes, good take, yes exactly. But it rubs people
Speaker 2: the wrong way because they don't well oh well, you
Speaker 2: know the etiquette experts, right, okay, so like etiquette says,
Speaker 2: I don't think anybody's following etiquette. In twenty twenty, everybody's out, girl.
Speaker 1: People be having GoFundMe for like vaginal rejuvenation surgeries and
Speaker 1: shit like that. There's no anymore.
Speaker 2: God, Okay, yes, people are tightening the and they're also
Speaker 2: created and they want you to pay for it exactly exactly. No,
Speaker 2: And that's where, like, you know, again, I always reference
Speaker 2: to my mother whenever we're talking this podcast, because God
Speaker 2: bless her, she just like is a wealth of like
Speaker 2: just content. My mom is like, go the gofundmes for
Speaker 2: the vaginal rejuvenation. My mom would be mortified. But also
Speaker 2: my mom would be mortified about this because you know,
Speaker 2: when you're getting married, there are a lot of people
Speaker 2: who potentially can't come to your wedding, especially if you
Speaker 2: have a big family. I know, for my sake, I
Speaker 2: have of our family lives in California and Florida, nicaraua
Speaker 2: like everywhere. Right, So you have a registry so that
Speaker 2: people have the option if they can't make it, to
Speaker 2: send you a little something, you know, like wanna go Sita,
Speaker 2: you know. But when you're doing the Honey Fund, you're like, no,
Speaker 2: I don't want your choch keys. I want money so
Speaker 2: that I can go and live my best life in
Speaker 2: Bulhard Bora Bora right right. But a lot of people
Speaker 2: are saying that it's tacky. And actually, for those of
Speaker 2: you who are listening to Life in Spanglish, I have
Speaker 2: a morning show and I have a co host and
Speaker 2: his name is greg T. Greg T was invited to
Speaker 2: a wedding where they they gave the link to the
Speaker 2: Honey Fund. And when I tell you, this man's blood
Speaker 2: pressure was through the roof. He was so offended, so offendil.
Speaker 1: He was like, how theare they asked me for coal
Speaker 1: hard cash to go have wild sex in Fiji?
Speaker 2: Well, you know what? And I always like to think, Hey,
Speaker 2: if my money contributes to your love making, that I
Speaker 2: am here for it, you know, because I'd rather you know,
Speaker 2: some people say like, oh, whenever they use their china,
Speaker 2: I want them to think of me, Honey, did you
Speaker 2: get china for your wedding?
Speaker 1: You know what, I still have. I have the blender
Speaker 1: that I got for my wedding. But you know what,
Speaker 1: me and NOONI were already living together for like five years,
Speaker 1: and I just made a wedding registry because my wedding planner,
Speaker 1: which happened to be my older sister, was like, you
Speaker 1: have to register somewhere. I'm like, but I don't want anything.
Speaker 1: She said, well, you replace things, you know, maybe things
Speaker 1: that you don't own, if you want to get, like
Speaker 1: something that you would never pay for yourself. And I
Speaker 1: felt like a lot of it was waste of money.
Speaker 1: Like I have albums with our names engraved. They've never
Speaker 1: been filled. I have a million champagne glasses with our
Speaker 1: initials that have never been used. Girl, I would have
Speaker 1: one thousand times more preferred that honeyfund existed and that
Speaker 1: all that money that everyone spent would have went towards
Speaker 1: an amazing honeymoon.
Speaker 2: Well so now here's the thing, though, if somebody's listening
Speaker 2: right now and they're thinking about getting married, there is
Speaker 2: a catch with the honey fund or with these sights,
Speaker 2: because it's not just honey Fund. There are a bunch
Speaker 2: of different ones. There's like wanderable dot Com. There's like
Speaker 2: a bunch of different like websites that you can go
Speaker 2: to to register for this stuff. So what happens is
Speaker 2: what ends up happening is they don't I don't charge
Speaker 2: the person who is sending you the money, but when
Speaker 2: you withdraw the money, there is a little fee that
Speaker 2: they take out for their services. So you know, you're
Speaker 2: not getting this like completely scot free, you know, for
Speaker 2: the sake of saying that, but yeah, I mean, I
Speaker 2: guess it's like it's a different approach to looking at
Speaker 2: your gifts or the things that you're going to receive
Speaker 2: and whether or not it's actually something that you will use.
Speaker 2: Like you're right, honey. A lot of people now they're
Speaker 2: living together. This isn't like nineteen seventies nineteen eighties, right
Speaker 2: where people would get married out of high school. They
Speaker 2: would get married out of like you know, after college,
Speaker 2: and it was forbidden for you to live together. Now
Speaker 2: you're getting couples who live together for like five, six,
Speaker 2: seven years and they already have blenders. Yeah, they already
Speaker 2: have a salad spinner, which, by the way, I still
Speaker 2: have my salad spinner for my wedding and it works batulously.
Speaker 2: But no, you know, I think that there is something
Speaker 2: to be said about the creativity and whether or not,
Speaker 2: you know, I would have done it or not. I mean, look,
Speaker 2: we ended up like you end up losing money when
Speaker 2: you throw a big wedding. You don't even I don't
Speaker 2: know about you. But like, we got gifts, but it
Speaker 2: didn't even cover like what we spent on the wedding.
Speaker 2: It put a small debt into like what we ended
Speaker 2: up spending.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I got gifts like during my bridal shower from
Speaker 1: like the all the women that were involved in the wedding.
Speaker 1: But I had a destination wedding and I did not
Speaker 1: feel comfortable accepting any gifts at all. So I told
Speaker 1: all of my guests that they did not need to
Speaker 1: give us gifts or money. So we our wedding. We
Speaker 1: just paid for it. You know, some people like I
Speaker 1: made all my money bag, Well no, we made zero
Speaker 1: dollars back. All my wedding was completely funded by us cash.
Speaker 1: That's the only good thing. We didn't charge anything, So
Speaker 1: the day after the wedding. We didn't have any debt,
Speaker 1: but we didn't have no envelopes either.
Speaker 2: Well, you brought up the D word, which was what
Speaker 2: I was going to bring up after we go to breaks.
Speaker 2: So a lot of people are talking about whether or
Speaker 2: not this is tacky if people are taking away from
Speaker 2: the special moment of their wedding because they're requesting money.
Speaker 2: Basically like, look, we didn't do Please tell me did
Speaker 2: you do the money dance? You know that's like a
Speaker 2: thing in some cultures, right, No, you know what the
Speaker 2: money dances.
Speaker 1: I've seen it, but my Dominican culture, we don't do it.
Speaker 2: No. Yeah, my mom was against it, like from the
Speaker 2: very beginning, from my sister getting married back in like
Speaker 2: nineteen ninety or whatever. My oldest sister got married when
Speaker 2: she was younger, right out of college, and my mom
Speaker 2: was like, no way, we are not having people pin
Speaker 2: dollars onto your wedding dress that they saved up so
Speaker 2: much money for. My mom was like, that is not happening.
Speaker 2: But there are different ways that people, like air quotes
Speaker 2: make money at their wedding. But honey, you brought up
Speaker 2: something that I want to discuss next after we go
Speaker 2: to break and that's the debt of the way wedding.
Speaker 2: So we'll get into it right after this. So now
Speaker 2: experts are saying that if you are going to get married,
Speaker 2: the number one thing that you should consider is if
Speaker 2: you can afford it. Okay, a lot of people cannot
Speaker 2: afford to have weddings that they imagine because once you
Speaker 2: start getting into it, like, for example, you did a
Speaker 2: destination wedding. We did a wedding in New York. We
Speaker 2: put a deposit down. That deposit was for the space itself.
Speaker 2: That didn't include the tables, the chairs, the linens, the food,
Speaker 2: the entertainment. You know, like so all of these things.
Speaker 2: You start looking at it from a bigger picture and
Speaker 2: you're like, oh my gosh, what are we doing. Look
Speaker 2: at all of this money that we're going to be spending.
Speaker 1: You need a spreadsheet when you're planning a wedding. You
Speaker 1: need a whole Excel spreadsheet because if not, Carolina, you'll
Speaker 1: end up spending so much money you don't even know
Speaker 1: where it went.
Speaker 2: I think you don't even need a spreadsheet. It's just
Speaker 2: like you need to make sure that what's going in
Speaker 2: and out. Yeah, I was going to say you need
Speaker 2: a money manager at that point, because like people don't
Speaker 2: realize unless you have a fixed budget and you're willing
Speaker 2: to do like you know, have you seen these people
Speaker 2: recently that catered their wedding with Chili's And people were
Speaker 2: pissed off about it, and other people were like, I
Speaker 2: think it's smart. You know that what your family is
Speaker 2: going to like, you know that you're on a budget,
Speaker 2: and it's like, hey, the people who love you are
Speaker 2: coming to celebrate you. They're not there to like criticize
Speaker 2: what you decide to serve for your wedding. But what
Speaker 2: experts are saying is that before you get married, you
Speaker 2: need to look at the bigger picture and say, is
Speaker 2: this money worth it to me for one night where
Speaker 2: my family and friends get together and we have this
Speaker 2: big celebration, or is this money better well spent as
Speaker 2: a down payment for a house, which is also what
Speaker 2: some people are using a honey fund for. Some people
Speaker 2: are saying like, look, my my now husband and I
Speaker 2: traveled so much when we were together. Now what we
Speaker 2: really need to do instead of a honey fund, we
Speaker 2: need a down payment for a house. So instead of
Speaker 2: giving us gifts, you can contribute money to that, which
Speaker 2: I have to be honest, I don't find any issue
Speaker 2: with that.
Speaker 1: I don't either. And if you're listening and you don't
Speaker 1: know what to do, there is a show on Netflix
Speaker 1: that's called Marriage or Mortgage, and it puts a lot
Speaker 1: into perspective, and it's couples and they meet with like
Speaker 1: a wedding planner and a real estate agent, and actually
Speaker 1: they compete, like one person wants the wedding, one person
Speaker 1: wants the mortgage. It's a cute little show. And if
Speaker 1: you're right now contemplating, like should I spend sixty thousand
Speaker 1: dollars on a wedding or put it down towards a
Speaker 1: down payment, maybe that's a show you can start with.
Speaker 2: I never even heard of that. I'm definitely gonna have
Speaker 2: to check it out.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've watched it, and I would still do my
Speaker 1: wedding care I didn't own my home when I did
Speaker 1: my wedding, but also it was a week thing. I
Speaker 1: don't regret it. Eventually I got more money and I
Speaker 1: bought a house, and I bought another house. But I
Speaker 1: could have never had a wedding and another wedding and
Speaker 1: another wedding, So I'm glad I spent the money I
Speaker 1: spent on my wedding. That was one memory that I
Speaker 1: could never recreate. The money for the house. I could
Speaker 1: raise it two, three, four or five times over.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I have to agree with you. I have no regrets.
Speaker 2: And just like having all of the people who I
Speaker 2: loved and loved me in that space and seeing Mark
Speaker 2: and I, Yeah, and just like the vibe that we created.
Speaker 2: I truly think that that was probably one of the
Speaker 2: best nights of my entire life. Where you know, most
Speaker 2: brides say, oh, this went wrong and that went wrong,
Speaker 2: and Mark and I, like, we didn't spend the nights
Speaker 2: we were already living together, and we didn't spend the
Speaker 2: night together before we got married. But we looked at
Speaker 2: each other and we said, no matter what, no matter
Speaker 2: what happens, this day, this day, like when we get married,
Speaker 2: is going to be just all about like the love
Speaker 2: that we share for each other. And when I tell
Speaker 2: you that nothing went wrong. Even my wedding planner was like,
Speaker 2: I don't think I've ever had a wedding that went
Speaker 2: this smoothly. She's like, no wakeups, not one thing. It
Speaker 2: was crazy. If it did. She kept it from us
Speaker 2: because she was absolutely fabulous. Claudie Hanlin over at the
Speaker 2: wedding library shout outs to her, the check is cleared.
Speaker 2: But yeah, it was one of those things where I
Speaker 2: would never take back that moment because it's like, I
Speaker 2: have pictures of me dancing with Maya Waalita. He was
Speaker 2: not here anymore. You know, Mark has pictures with his father.
Speaker 2: His father isn't here anymore, and he got to actually
Speaker 2: see us get married. So those are things, those are
Speaker 2: moments that I would never ever, you know, regret.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that. My wedding is actually the last time
Speaker 1: I saw Maya Walita before she passed away. So and
Speaker 1: the reason we got married in Dominican Republic was because
Speaker 1: Maya Worita was in a wheelchair and she couldn't travel.
Speaker 1: So I said, you know what, this is the most
Speaker 1: important woman in my life because when I was born,
Speaker 1: my mom was in New York City as a young
Speaker 1: woman and she was still trying to you know, she
Speaker 1: was still trying to get her feet wet and get
Speaker 1: her money up. And she set me as an infant
Speaker 1: to live with my Aweila, and I was there with
Speaker 1: her probably till I was like five years old. So
Speaker 1: this was my first.
Speaker 2: Mom, right, yeah, and you had that connection.
Speaker 1: I was not getting married unless this woman could be
Speaker 1: there and dad alone, Carolina makes having had that wedding
Speaker 1: the best decision I've made in my life.
Speaker 2: Well yeah, I mean, and that's what it's about. And listen,
Speaker 2: there are people who may not be close with their
Speaker 2: families and don't need that, and that's perfectly fine too,
Speaker 2: you know, because there are people who say, I'm happy
Speaker 2: going to the courthouse. It's just a piece of paper.
Speaker 2: This is the love of my life. This is what
Speaker 2: I want to do. And I'm a big believer in
Speaker 2: doing whatever makes you happy. But the only the thing
Speaker 2: that really bothers me about this, honey fund, I'll tell
Speaker 2: you the truth is that people have so many opinions,
Speaker 2: and it's like the world evolves. People evolved, people change,
Speaker 2: and it's just like what I told you before. It's
Speaker 2: like people aren't getting married when they're eighteen and nineteen
Speaker 2: years old anymore. You can't go and buy a house
Speaker 2: in a neighborhood as a startup house, and I mean,
Speaker 2: for real, like that. That's the state of the world
Speaker 2: that we're in right now. So why are you coming
Speaker 2: down on people for being creative. To me, I think
Speaker 2: it's a creative idea.
Speaker 1: It is, and you know, shout outs to this couple
Speaker 1: that came together and put this website together, because it's
Speaker 1: not something that I guess we would come out and
Speaker 1: ask and be like, hey, traditionally I want to go
Speaker 1: to Thailand. Why don't you? Guys like you just you
Speaker 1: feel bad even people giving you money nonetheless putting together
Speaker 1: whole landing page and saying we want to go on
Speaker 1: an African safari? Can you give us fifteen thousand dollars?
Speaker 1: But I feel like through this it's acceptable. And you
Speaker 1: know what, I'd rather give you money to go to
Speaker 1: let's say, Bora Bora, then to buy you a set
Speaker 1: of towels and some forks and some pots. I don't
Speaker 1: want to buy you none of that. I want you
Speaker 1: to have an experience that's gonna be emblazed in your
Speaker 1: brain forever.
Speaker 2: Well yeah, and also this is something really cool. When
Speaker 2: I was researching these different types of funds, I feel
Speaker 2: the exact same way that you do. I want to
Speaker 2: help somebody create an experience and a memory, and I
Speaker 2: want to be a part of that. Right. But like
Speaker 2: on some of these different sites, like you can say like, oh,
Speaker 2: this is for I'm making this up. This two hundred
Speaker 2: and fifty dollars is for your first dinner when you
Speaker 2: get to your honeymoon, and you can like, isn't that
Speaker 2: so cool? So like if the husband loves to golf, okay,
Speaker 2: you could put money toward like his golf outing, or
Speaker 2: you could put money toward her spa day so that
Speaker 2: she can relax after the wedding, which I think is
Speaker 2: like a really nice gesture, so that when she's getting
Speaker 2: that massage, she could be like, oh, honey, I gave
Speaker 2: this to me. I am thinking of them while I'm
Speaker 2: getting my massage, Like I wouldn't have gotten this if
Speaker 2: it weren't for them. So I do think that there
Speaker 2: are ways that you can personalize it and make it
Speaker 2: a little bit more special or sentimental, if you know
Speaker 2: what I mean. Because like a lot of people give
Speaker 2: you know, items thinking like oh, every time she uses
Speaker 2: the salad spinner, she's gonna think of me, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean. So it's like that way, that's what
Speaker 2: I feel like they get around it. And I do
Speaker 2: believe that that is a wonderful way to remember somebody's
Speaker 2: beautiful gesture for you on your wedding day.
Speaker 1: And I see it because two different people while we
Speaker 1: were in Dominican Republic, decided, oh, okay, I want to
Speaker 1: gift you guys some samba dancers. That was dope. I
Speaker 1: love that. I will ever remember the samba dancers. And
Speaker 1: then someone else said, I want to gift NOONI a
Speaker 1: cigar roller experience. That was super dope. Those two things
Speaker 1: forever stick in my mind as two people that were
Speaker 1: there decided to add that on to our wedding and
Speaker 1: it was special.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I just hope that, like maybe we're
Speaker 2: opening people's eyes to like maybe not be so judgmental
Speaker 2: or to be open to like different ideas when it
Speaker 2: comes to showing your love to the people that you
Speaker 2: care about, especially on such a big day. You know,
Speaker 2: you don't want to go into that with like hurt
Speaker 2: feelings or bad feelings. So I we don't know. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe be open to like these new creative ways that
Speaker 2: people are doing this because the world is changing. Like
Speaker 2: I said, honey, you know, it is not like how
Speaker 2: you and I when we got married. The way that
Speaker 2: things are and it's gonna be different. Five to ten
Speaker 2: years from now. I always I look at my husband
Speaker 2: and I wonder we talk about like our kids, and
Speaker 2: I'm like, gosh, I wonder what's gonna happen with our boys?
Speaker 2: Are they going to be like the type to get
Speaker 2: married young late? Like what are weddings going to look like?
Speaker 1: Then?
Speaker 2: So you know, sometimes you do you have to roll
Speaker 2: with the times. But you know, when we come back,
Speaker 2: we got to go to the salon. I'm so excited
Speaker 2: to read this letter to you because it's so June, see,
Speaker 2: and I cannot wait. You know, everybody says that they
Speaker 2: love Honey's opinions on the salon, so I got it
Speaker 2: up my game. That's coming up back. Well, if that
Speaker 2: wasn't a tease, Honey, ooh, we got a letter in
Speaker 2: the salon. And you guys know that you can always
Speaker 2: send us your issues or dilemmas or your problems so
Speaker 2: that Honey and I can hash it out. And typically
Speaker 2: we don't agree, which is always great, but you can
Speaker 2: send us your letters so that we can try to
Speaker 2: figure out your problems for you.
Speaker 1: So today's second Carolina. I'm putting a little bit of
Speaker 1: oil in my mouth because you know, lanes come my
Speaker 1: tongue has got to be ready.
Speaker 2: Go ahead, Oh she is ready ready, Okay, So here
Speaker 2: we go. This comes to us from Chloe. She said, Hey, ladies,
Speaker 2: I hope y'all are sitting because this one is messy.
Speaker 2: My younger brother has always been my best friend, mir Manito.
Speaker 2: We have an inseparable bond and I love him so much.
Speaker 2: But his nobe two years. Let's change her name. I'll
Speaker 2: call her Maria. Maria is a doll. I would be
Speaker 2: honored to call her my sister in law one day. Now.
Speaker 2: That's all fine and good, but recently, one of my
Speaker 2: homegirls caught my brother hooking up with another girl at
Speaker 2: the club. Yes there is photo evidence, and yes it
Speaker 2: was confirmed that he was creeping on his girlfriend. I
Speaker 2: feel sick to my stomach and don't know how to
Speaker 2: bring this up to him in a safe way. I
Speaker 2: don't want to ignore it, and it also has me
Speaker 2: second guessing who my brother really is. Any advice please,
Speaker 2: that comes to us from Chloe, and that is I'm
Speaker 2: going to leave that right there like a cat that
Speaker 2: just caught a bird outside and dropped it on the doorstep.
Speaker 2: There you go, okay, honey, here we go.
Speaker 1: Delivered First of all, Chloe, one word loyalty, and that
Speaker 1: is only to your brother. I don't even know why
Speaker 1: Maria was even mentioned in this letter, because Maria shall
Speaker 1: never know about this. I don't care how much you
Speaker 1: like her. Your brother is the only person that concerns
Speaker 1: you here.
Speaker 2: And this is where I step in. So yes, I
Speaker 2: do think that you have to be loyal to your brother.
Speaker 2: But I also do think that part of being a
Speaker 2: good friend or a good sibling or family member is
Speaker 2: to keep people accountable. I'm sorry, because you know what,
Speaker 2: don't be out there doing something dirty if you got
Speaker 2: this good girl that the family has accepted that you're
Speaker 2: bringing around for two years. Because that's the thing that
Speaker 2: a lot of people don't remember. When you are cheating
Speaker 2: on your girlfriend or boyfriend or your spouse, that person
Speaker 2: also has ties to your family too, And when somebody
Speaker 2: comes in, that's also difficult. Now, I'm not saying that
Speaker 2: Chloe should go to Maria and tell her what her
Speaker 2: brother's been up to. I don't think that Chloe shouldn't
Speaker 2: even go to her mom or dad or anyone. I
Speaker 2: think it's something where she goes to her brother and says, hey,
Speaker 2: you've been messy. You got caught. If you don't like
Speaker 2: this girl anymore, do the right thing and let her go.
Speaker 2: And I won't say anything, or I don't think she
Speaker 2: should say anything period to Maria. But I think that
Speaker 2: she should call him on the carpet and be like,
Speaker 2: why are you doing this, Carolina?
Speaker 1: Because men are men? But the hell why?
Speaker 2: No? No, no, no, no, he's doing this the fun.
Speaker 1: He's probably young, he met somebody, they saw him creeping.
Speaker 1: It's not like they saw him having sex somewhere. And
Speaker 1: I don't feel like men cheat because they don't love you.
Speaker 1: Here I go. Noone has brainwashed me. And he's always
Speaker 1: told me men don't cheat because they don't love their women.
Speaker 1: They cheat because it's an activity and it's fun, and
Speaker 1: then they eventually go back home. What do you think
Speaker 1: about that?
Speaker 2: But he think about closed and go pick up pickleball
Speaker 2: if you want some activity, noony, because that is not
Speaker 2: my not my style. Baby. No, defend all the men
Speaker 2: that cheat.
Speaker 1: He always defends them. He's like, there was no emotion
Speaker 1: behind that. For men, sex is an act, there is
Speaker 1: no attachment. It's an activity and then you go home.
Speaker 2: But that in itself is so wrong because like, there
Speaker 2: are two things that have an issue with that you
Speaker 2: just said, honey, and I'm gonna call you on it.
Speaker 2: Number one, like.
Speaker 1: Ill you're calling, I'm calling on this this type of
Speaker 1: behavior in my home.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, of course not. But what I'm saying
Speaker 2: is like the whole boys will be boys mentality, It
Speaker 2: is twenty twenty three. Okay, that is the biggest croc
Speaker 2: of bullshit. It's also like preventing you from being a man.
Speaker 2: A man thinks about other people. A man thinks about
Speaker 2: how his behavior will affect other people that he loves
Speaker 2: before he does something that's a man.
Speaker 1: But there because you don't find out.
Speaker 2: Well, no, but that's but that's why I'm saying, Chloe,
Speaker 2: your brother is exhibiting little boy behavior because the little
Speaker 2: boy can't make a choice and he's out there in
Speaker 2: the streets grinding on some random girl, making out with
Speaker 2: her at the club while his little girlfriend is at
Speaker 2: home thinking that he's like, you know, being faithful. That's
Speaker 2: what a boy does. But a man would be at
Speaker 2: home with his girlfriend, not going out to the clubs
Speaker 2: and acting crazy. So that's where that I think that
Speaker 2: that's an issue that I don't like that phrase at all, because,
Speaker 2: like I said, we don't raise our boys like what
Speaker 2: the whole boys will be boys mentality. You know, I've
Speaker 2: said to my sons too, even because you know, Noah's
Speaker 2: getting to the point, like he's nine, he's starting like
Speaker 2: the girls are starting. The stuff is starting. And I
Speaker 2: say to him sometimes he'll be he'll treat me badly
Speaker 2: because he had a bad day, or he'll talk back
Speaker 2: to me, or he'll be snippy, and I say, hey, Noah,
Speaker 2: I know you had a bad day. But you know what,
Speaker 2: when you love somebody and somebody loves you and you
Speaker 2: treat them that way, they're not going to tolerate it.
Speaker 2: If you love someone, then you have to communicate. You
Speaker 2: have to say I had a really bad day today.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry if I'm being short with you, it's not fair.
Speaker 2: I know I need some time to myself. That starts now,
Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. So it's like this whole
Speaker 2: thing about like him being her brother and not being
Speaker 2: able to the video is out there, so if she
Speaker 2: doesn't tell him the friend saw it and recorded it,
Speaker 2: somebody's gonna find out. That's why I feel like it's
Speaker 2: being loyal by telling your brother. Hey, the word is
Speaker 2: out on the street. You got caught. Now you need
Speaker 2: to do the right thing. You got yourself from this
Speaker 2: situation now.
Speaker 1: Definitely, if there's video footage, I need.
Speaker 2: It, she said. Hold on one second, she said, she said,
Speaker 2: him hooking up with another girl at the cup. Yes,
Speaker 2: there is photo evidence. Yes, it was confirmed that he
Speaker 2: was creeping. So boom right there. It's like, you put
Speaker 2: yourself in this position.
Speaker 1: Nah, you definitely got to put me on. If you
Speaker 1: and my sibling, you got to put me on. But
Speaker 1: don't think you're gonna put me in my place. Don't
Speaker 1: worry about what I'm doing in my personal life. You
Speaker 1: gotta be like, bitch, there's a picture if you creep
Speaker 1: in exactly. You gotta get ahead of this. You got
Speaker 1: to get ahead of this. But I don't expect you
Speaker 1: to look down on me talk about oh, you shouldn't
Speaker 1: be cheating.
Speaker 2: Nah, don't get involved.
Speaker 1: In my personal life. You know you don't know what's
Speaker 1: going on here. Just put me on so I could
Speaker 1: get my story straight. But don't try to.
Speaker 2: Wrap absolutely well that you know. I mean, I guess
Speaker 2: like it sounds like they're very very close, So I
Speaker 2: don't know if she can help herself, because when you're
Speaker 2: really close with somebody, it's almost like you know, I
Speaker 2: love you. But I don't think that this will affect
Speaker 2: their relationship. I think it would affect their relationship if
Speaker 2: she goes to Maria and says something to her.
Speaker 1: And also close a viihilation that right, theere is a violation.
Speaker 1: If my sibling snitches me.
Speaker 2: Out on cheating, oh forget it.
Speaker 1: Our relationship is strained for life. I'm never gonna let
Speaker 1: that go.
Speaker 2: No, that breaks the bond right there. But what I
Speaker 2: am saying is, Chloe, you need to go to your
Speaker 2: friend and say, hey, do me as solid. Don't send
Speaker 2: that out to anybody. Don't snapchat that shit. That's my brother,
Speaker 2: that's my baby brother. Whatever. Let me repeat it to him,
Speaker 2: right and let me figure this out, like do me
Speaker 2: a favor, and like don't like that stays between us,
Speaker 2: like me, you and him, Like, don't be sending that
Speaker 2: out to other people because like that's the other thing
Speaker 2: that happens, and be a you know what I means.
Speaker 2: And now this one tells that one and that one
Speaker 2: and it's gonna get back to Maria anyway. That's why
Speaker 2: I'm saying Chloe, like, if you are loyal and if
Speaker 2: you're a good sister, you need to approach your brother
Speaker 2: and let him know he got caught. You know about it.
Speaker 2: There's a picture. What are you gonna do about it?
Speaker 1: Put together a plan? Okay, tell your homegirl, Yo, hold
Speaker 1: it down. Don't blow up my brother. We don't want
Speaker 1: to hurt Maria. She's an innocent victim and all this.
Speaker 1: Then pull up on your brother and be like, yo,
Speaker 1: you out here, be a messy. We got photographic evidence.
Speaker 1: If that makes it on socials, it's over. But you
Speaker 1: and Maria, you're gonna break her heart. And she said, sweetheart,
Speaker 1: and Mommy likes, how are we going to handle this?
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure exactly. He can still come out of this,
Speaker 1: you know what.
Speaker 2: And that's why I agree with you there too. And
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, Chloe, like, so many relationships have
Speaker 2: gone through these ups and downs. It sounds like you
Speaker 2: guys are young, you know what I mean, And like
Speaker 2: there are so many relationships that have gotten through a
Speaker 2: cheating you know. And by the way, it's like he's
Speaker 2: dancing with a girl at the club. Maybe he made
Speaker 2: out with her, all right, Like you can bounce back
Speaker 2: from that. But I think it's the dishonesty that is
Speaker 2: really really the issue here, and that he needs to
Speaker 2: like grab a hold of it if he's still interested
Speaker 2: in Maria, because we don't even know, he might be.
Speaker 1: Over it too, especially if he's already out here creeping.
Speaker 1: But then again, if it's a young guy, you know,
Speaker 1: young people, they like variety. They're fluid. They don't know
Speaker 1: what they like today, they don't know what they like tomorrow.
Speaker 2: I know, thus fluid. Everybody's fluid. That's another episode too.
Speaker 1: I don't blame them. I should be fluid too, girl.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I feel like sometimes I feel like men just
Speaker 1: don't get women. But that's another episode too.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, you know what, we are going to
Speaker 2: create a compound and we're just going to go with
Speaker 2: like all women come and you know, we're gonna start
Speaker 2: raising our kids together. It takes a village, seriously, but no,
Speaker 2: oh please, I've had visions of it with my best friend.
Speaker 2: We want to raise allainess well garden kidding you everything
Speaker 2: for everything from the earth. I mean, no preservatives, no GMOs,
Speaker 2: not hair, what hair, dried hair? Come on now? But yes, Chloe,
Speaker 2: I hope we helped you, and please please keep us
Speaker 2: posting because we love to hear follow ups to this
Speaker 2: and you can reach me. I'm at the Real Carolina
Speaker 2: on all socials.
Speaker 1: Hit me up on Instagram, It's I am Honey German,
Speaker 1: and make sure to follow and subscribe.
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Speaker 1: Guys.
Speaker 2: We hope you have a great week and we'll be
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