1 00:00:01,760 --> 00:00:05,280 Speaker 1: Welcome to Time Out. I'm Eve Rodsky, author of the 2 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:08,920 Speaker 1: New York Times bestseller fair Play and Find Your Unicorn Space, 3 00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:13,440 Speaker 1: activists on the gender division of labor, attorney and family mediator. 4 00:00:13,720 --> 00:00:16,840 Speaker 1: And I'm Doctor add In the Rukar, a physician and 5 00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:21,160 Speaker 1: medical correspondent with an expertise in the science of stress, resilience, 6 00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:24,400 Speaker 1: mental health, and burnout. We're here to peel back to 7 00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:27,639 Speaker 1: layers around why it's so easy for society to guard 8 00:00:27,720 --> 00:00:31,040 Speaker 1: men's time as if it's diamonds, and to treat women's 9 00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:34,440 Speaker 1: time as if it's infinite like sands. And whether you 10 00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:37,280 Speaker 1: are partnered with or without children, or in a career 11 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:40,000 Speaker 1: where you want more boundaries, this is the place for 12 00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:44,080 Speaker 1: you for all family structures. We're here to take a 13 00:00:44,159 --> 00:00:49,640 Speaker 1: time out to learn, get inspired, and most importantly, reclaim 14 00:00:49,840 --> 00:01:00,880 Speaker 1: our time. Hi d hi E. I get to be 15 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:03,000 Speaker 1: on your time zone today as we're recording, so it 16 00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:04,840 Speaker 1: just feels fun to be in the same time zone. 17 00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:09,479 Speaker 1: I love it. You feel even closer than you usually feel. Well. 18 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:13,400 Speaker 1: I wanted to tell you a little bit about my 19 00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:19,880 Speaker 1: journey to understanding goals, because goals, I think you know, 20 00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:22,839 Speaker 1: sometimes we just set them out for ourselves, maybe based 21 00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:25,680 Speaker 1: on other people's expectations. And I don't know if I 22 00:01:25,680 --> 00:01:28,320 Speaker 1: always really thought about why I set goals, or if 23 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:31,080 Speaker 1: I even knew what those goals are. I definitely didn't 24 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,200 Speaker 1: have a vision board in my third grade bedroom. I 25 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:37,840 Speaker 1: had like teen Bop posters up there. But what's interesting 26 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:42,520 Speaker 1: about Find Your Unicorn Space was that in so many 27 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:46,560 Speaker 1: of my interviews with creative people, the word goals came up, 28 00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:49,440 Speaker 1: and so I felt like it would be a disservice 29 00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:52,440 Speaker 1: not to address them in a chapter in the book. 30 00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:57,080 Speaker 1: Goal setting became very important to people living a creative life. 31 00:01:57,160 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 1: That's I think the difference between unicorn space and a 32 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:03,960 Speaker 1: hobby not only the infrequency that a hobby connotes, but 33 00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:07,880 Speaker 1: a unicorn space has goals and a lot of people 34 00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:10,600 Speaker 1: level up. As my son said to me when I 35 00:02:10,639 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 1: was talking to him about goal setting, he said, yeah, 36 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:16,360 Speaker 1: dumb mom, because whether it's life or video games, no 37 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:23,400 Speaker 1: one wants to die on level one. So if we 38 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:25,160 Speaker 1: don't want to die on level one, I think we 39 00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:26,720 Speaker 1: do have to set some goals. But how do we 40 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:29,120 Speaker 1: know they're the right goals? And so I wrote that 41 00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:31,840 Speaker 1: down in a moleskin. How do I know that this 42 00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:34,560 Speaker 1: is the right goal for me, or how does somebody 43 00:02:34,639 --> 00:02:37,480 Speaker 1: know it's the right goal? And I started to ask questions, 44 00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:41,640 Speaker 1: and two things came up that felt totally contradictory to me. 45 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:45,399 Speaker 1: But you'll probably tell me from a brain science perspective 46 00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:48,000 Speaker 1: why they're actually complimentary and not contradictory. But in the 47 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:52,720 Speaker 1: beginning it felt contradictory, which was so many people half 48 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:55,480 Speaker 1: said to me that they followed some version of a big, hairy, 49 00:02:55,520 --> 00:03:00,720 Speaker 1: audacious goal. I want to put people on the moon. 50 00:03:03,200 --> 00:03:06,120 Speaker 1: That's why it's often called a moon shot, even though 51 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:08,520 Speaker 1: I really hate I don't really like that word. It 52 00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:10,920 Speaker 1: sounds I don't know, it sounds porn like porn to 53 00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:15,440 Speaker 1: me or something. And then often i'd also hear the opposite, 54 00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 1: which is, well, the way I got to where I 55 00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:22,839 Speaker 1: am is I took extremely small steps. And so how 56 00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:26,160 Speaker 1: did I reconcile those two? Well, then I realized, okay, 57 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,720 Speaker 1: what was happening. It seemed was that there were people 58 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:36,560 Speaker 1: who had big, hairy, audacious goals that came from Jim Collins. 59 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:39,520 Speaker 1: That's his sort of framework. I'd like to add in another, 60 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:43,640 Speaker 1: a big hairy, audacious, authentic goals, And so they would 61 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:47,800 Speaker 1: have these big goals, like Sandy Zimmerman. She said, I 62 00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:51,880 Speaker 1: want to be on American Ninja Warrior. I'm a pe 63 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:55,040 Speaker 1: teacher in the Midwest. I have no experience with parkour. 64 00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:57,640 Speaker 1: I know I'm physically fit, but I want to be 65 00:03:57,760 --> 00:03:59,680 Speaker 1: on that show. I see people on that show, I 66 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:01,920 Speaker 1: want to to what they're doing. So that's a big, hairy, 67 00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:04,680 Speaker 1: audacious goal. And then at the same time, I would 68 00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:08,280 Speaker 1: hear well to get there, I also had to just 69 00:04:08,480 --> 00:04:11,360 Speaker 1: swing on the salmon ladder for seven weeks in a row. 70 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:14,320 Speaker 1: I couldn't even move my arms up to the next wrong. 71 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:24,719 Speaker 1: I just swung there until I got the courage to 72 00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:28,760 Speaker 1: move up to the next wrong. And so I think 73 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:34,600 Speaker 1: what I finally realized was that you can have a big, hairy, audacious, 74 00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:37,960 Speaker 1: authentic goal, and a lot of people actually were doing 75 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:41,000 Speaker 1: it in the present tense, which I found interesting. So 76 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:43,520 Speaker 1: instead of saying I want to be on American Ninja Warrior, 77 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:47,560 Speaker 1: my interviewees were saying things to me like I am 78 00:04:47,839 --> 00:04:52,120 Speaker 1: cast for American Ninja Warrior, or I'm going on American 79 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:54,440 Speaker 1: Ninja Warrior. They started to say their goals in the 80 00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:58,279 Speaker 1: present tense, which I found really interesting to me. And 81 00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:02,120 Speaker 1: also concur it with some books out there, like Professor 82 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:05,240 Speaker 1: Benjamin Hardy, who talks about your future self. And then 83 00:05:05,279 --> 00:05:08,360 Speaker 1: I would also hear my next step on my journey 84 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:13,119 Speaker 1: is the smallest, teenious thing, like buying a better pair 85 00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:18,600 Speaker 1: of sneakers. But I also knew from goal setting that 86 00:05:18,839 --> 00:05:23,279 Speaker 1: small steps matter. I had read many different frameworks for 87 00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:26,320 Speaker 1: goal setting. One of my favorite was the smart goal framework, 88 00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:30,680 Speaker 1: which is that goals have to be specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, 89 00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:34,560 Speaker 1: and time based. And so how do you reconcile or 90 00:05:34,640 --> 00:05:36,360 Speaker 1: do you think one is more important than the other, 91 00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:40,440 Speaker 1: or do you think you need big, hairy, audacious, authentic 92 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:45,560 Speaker 1: goals and the understanding that the very very small steps 93 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:48,040 Speaker 1: of goal setting also need to be there as well. 94 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:52,159 Speaker 1: It's interesting because we need both. And you can think 95 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:56,000 Speaker 1: of that big, hairy, audacious, authentic goal like your north star, 96 00:05:57,240 --> 00:06:00,320 Speaker 1: what's going to guide you forward? What's that in tension 97 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:04,600 Speaker 1: that you're setting for yourself. It's incredibly value based. And 98 00:06:04,680 --> 00:06:09,200 Speaker 1: that's why that second A for authentic right. It's your driver, 99 00:06:09,560 --> 00:06:12,240 Speaker 1: it's what gets you up in the morning, it's your why. 100 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:15,320 Speaker 1: And when we have that north star to guide us, 101 00:06:15,839 --> 00:06:19,160 Speaker 1: it gives our life meaning and purpose and helps us 102 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:24,520 Speaker 1: through the drudgery. The drudgery is part two, which is 103 00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:28,880 Speaker 1: the small step goals. They're not sexy, they're not glamorous, 104 00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:31,800 Speaker 1: but you need to do step by step, and you 105 00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:36,240 Speaker 1: need both because you need that vision and dream to 106 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:40,360 Speaker 1: keep you going when things get difficult, but you need 107 00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:43,279 Speaker 1: a plan to get there. The other thing that I 108 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:48,040 Speaker 1: think is fascinating is even though we begin with the 109 00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:51,719 Speaker 1: end in mind, like the example that you gave about 110 00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:57,560 Speaker 1: the park Core Championship, we may begin with the end 111 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:00,600 Speaker 1: in mind because it's incredibly motive aiding and it's a 112 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:06,880 Speaker 1: driving force. But often even those small steps, just incorporating 113 00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:10,760 Speaker 1: a little bit of that into our daily life might 114 00:07:10,840 --> 00:07:15,640 Speaker 1: be enough two fuel us and make us feel a 115 00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:20,119 Speaker 1: sense of fulfillment, help us feel satiated. So that north 116 00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:24,640 Speaker 1: star or that big hairy goal is a driver, a marker, 117 00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:27,800 Speaker 1: and a way for you to be guided forward. It 118 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:31,400 Speaker 1: might not eventually be your destination, and that's okay. The 119 00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:34,080 Speaker 1: fact is that you're on the journey and that first 120 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:37,040 Speaker 1: step and second step and third step of the journey 121 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:40,560 Speaker 1: is what matters. And I think that's so important because 122 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:43,560 Speaker 1: people get so hung up on that big hairy, audacious, 123 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,840 Speaker 1: authentic goal because they want to set something that's within 124 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:50,400 Speaker 1: limits and the second guess what that goal should be 125 00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:53,960 Speaker 1: and is it too small or it's too big. But 126 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:56,480 Speaker 1: the bigger the better. It has more force and more 127 00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:59,280 Speaker 1: power to drive you. The reason I want to bring 128 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:03,040 Speaker 1: that up is because I don't want people to feel 129 00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:05,640 Speaker 1: blindsided if they don't meet that goal, because often what 130 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:08,000 Speaker 1: happens is when you start that journey right, like, that 131 00:08:08,040 --> 00:08:10,520 Speaker 1: first step is the most difficult. We know that with 132 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:14,760 Speaker 1: Newtonian physics it takes more energy to get something in motion, 133 00:08:14,840 --> 00:08:16,960 Speaker 1: but when something is motion, it takes less energy to 134 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 1: keep it in motion. So we have to take that 135 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:23,800 Speaker 1: first step and get our bodies in motion, and that 136 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:28,720 Speaker 1: often is enough to feel that sense of fulfillment. I 137 00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:31,920 Speaker 1: think that's so important because that goes back to what 138 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:37,319 Speaker 1: Ben said about not die on level one, whether it's 139 00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:40,360 Speaker 1: in again, where it's in the Game of Life or 140 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:45,520 Speaker 1: or actual life. Because it doesn't necessarily mean that your 141 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:49,080 Speaker 1: level A thousand was the one you thought it was 142 00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:50,920 Speaker 1: going to be, as you said a d D. That 143 00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:54,280 Speaker 1: can change. But having that north star and continuing to 144 00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:57,080 Speaker 1: play it doesn't mean it will be easy, but it 145 00:08:57,120 --> 00:09:02,600 Speaker 1: does mean that leveling up is a good thing. It's 146 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:05,480 Speaker 1: a good thing to have a plan because it feels hard, 147 00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:09,640 Speaker 1: and it feels strange to think you're going to be 148 00:09:09,679 --> 00:09:12,680 Speaker 1: the one doing it. Because sometimes, like you said, with 149 00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:15,160 Speaker 1: Newtonian physics, it's easier for me to stay at risk 150 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:17,559 Speaker 1: and let the person next door do it, let them 151 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:21,280 Speaker 1: be the president of United States. But when it's you 152 00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:25,079 Speaker 1: and you start realizing, wow, I can do this. There's 153 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:27,200 Speaker 1: this book, The Great Work of Your Life, and it 154 00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:30,439 Speaker 1: talks about how we can find that sense of meaning 155 00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:34,160 Speaker 1: and purpose, how we can find that north star. What's 156 00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:39,040 Speaker 1: interesting is that many people are just adjacent to their 157 00:09:39,559 --> 00:09:42,760 Speaker 1: big dream or big vision. It's not a one eight 158 00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 1: turn that we have to make. Often it's like a 159 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:49,040 Speaker 1: five or ten degree turn or pivot or tilt. So, 160 00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:51,680 Speaker 1: for example, in the case of Sandy's Immerman, she wanted 161 00:09:51,679 --> 00:09:55,840 Speaker 1: to be a parkour star. She was already a pe 162 00:09:55,880 --> 00:10:00,320 Speaker 1: teacher and physically fit, so she was already embodied a 163 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:03,120 Speaker 1: lot of the traits that she would need to then 164 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:08,760 Speaker 1: meet her big, harry audacious, authentic goal. So in many ways, 165 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:13,000 Speaker 1: when we have that aha moment, that idea or inspiration, 166 00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:17,360 Speaker 1: the spark to really do something big. We already have 167 00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:20,880 Speaker 1: all of the raw materials within us to make it happen. 168 00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:24,240 Speaker 1: It's just a matter of aligning those maybe refining and 169 00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:28,120 Speaker 1: honing certain skills. You know. One of my favorite expressions 170 00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:33,120 Speaker 1: by I Believe, a Japanese empress who was profiled in 171 00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:36,000 Speaker 1: Vogue magazine. Believe it or not. She talked about how 172 00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:41,480 Speaker 1: she had many different lives before she became empress, and 173 00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:44,680 Speaker 1: she just said a very simple statement, nothing in life 174 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:49,679 Speaker 1: is ever wasted. That resonated with me so deeply because 175 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:51,800 Speaker 1: that was the message I needed to hear at the time, 176 00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:54,560 Speaker 1: and for all of our listeners. You may be on 177 00:10:54,600 --> 00:10:57,600 Speaker 1: a certain path, you may want to go somewhere else, 178 00:10:57,960 --> 00:11:03,880 Speaker 1: but nothing in your life has been wasted. Every opportunity, struggle, strength, 179 00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:08,760 Speaker 1: and achievement that you've already had can be fuel and 180 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:13,280 Speaker 1: fire for your next journey. We're so excited to talk 181 00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:16,319 Speaker 1: about all of these topics with today's guests. Robin ar Zone. 182 00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:19,040 Speaker 1: Robin is the New York Times best selling author of 183 00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:21,920 Speaker 1: Shut Up and Run and Strong Mama. She's also the 184 00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:25,200 Speaker 1: vice president of fitness Programming and head instructor at Peloton. 185 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:30,240 Speaker 1: Robin started her career actually as a lawyer. She's also 186 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:34,960 Speaker 1: a recovering lawyer, and she discovered her passion for athletics 187 00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:39,600 Speaker 1: and so much more. Robin is a consummate goal setter. 188 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:44,200 Speaker 1: She's our inspiration today for setting goals, meeting goals, and 189 00:11:44,280 --> 00:11:47,920 Speaker 1: surpassing goals. We cannot wait for her to share her 190 00:11:47,960 --> 00:12:05,400 Speaker 1: story with all of you. We're so excited for our guests, 191 00:12:05,520 --> 00:12:08,559 Speaker 1: Robin Arzon to be joining us. Robin does the VP 192 00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:11,960 Speaker 1: of fitness Programming and head instructor at Peloton. She's also 193 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 1: a New York Times best selling author. Hi Robin, hi 194 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,560 Speaker 1: dd hi Eve, thank you for having me today. So 195 00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:20,400 Speaker 1: we have lots of different goals setting questions, So I 196 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:23,520 Speaker 1: think maybe we'll just start with tell us, what do 197 00:12:23,559 --> 00:12:26,000 Speaker 1: you think about goal setting? Do you think of them 198 00:12:26,040 --> 00:12:28,960 Speaker 1: as your big hair, audacious goals? Do you think of 199 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:33,959 Speaker 1: them as small steps? I love goals. I mean I 200 00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:38,160 Speaker 1: I see goals as as mini finish lines. As someone 201 00:12:38,200 --> 00:12:40,040 Speaker 1: who didn't work out as a kid, the fact that 202 00:12:40,080 --> 00:12:43,120 Speaker 1: I live in a in a sports analogy is absurd 203 00:12:43,160 --> 00:12:47,720 Speaker 1: to me, Like that's absurd. But I absolutely adore goals. 204 00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:53,560 Speaker 1: I believe that we can have self generated momentum. And 205 00:12:53,600 --> 00:12:57,000 Speaker 1: there are lots of tools that get us unstuck and 206 00:12:57,040 --> 00:13:01,800 Speaker 1: out of inertia. For me, movement is not only health practice, 207 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:04,760 Speaker 1: but it is a creative practice. I actually believe that 208 00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:09,400 Speaker 1: I paint and sweat and so my goals. I get 209 00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:11,840 Speaker 1: just as excited about the granular goals as I do 210 00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:15,400 Speaker 1: about the big ones. And I pretty much live in hyperbole. 211 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:18,120 Speaker 1: Like in my head it's like you are the baddest 212 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:21,439 Speaker 1: be on the planet. Like I am constantly digging myself up. 213 00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:24,400 Speaker 1: But I also am in love with the process. And 214 00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:26,160 Speaker 1: I think this is where people get a little bit 215 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:30,600 Speaker 1: miss aligned with the spirit of goal setting when they 216 00:13:30,679 --> 00:13:35,319 Speaker 1: don't fall in love with the process and the boring 217 00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:39,160 Speaker 1: stuff and the things that don't feel exciting, that don't 218 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:43,200 Speaker 1: feel you know that will be applauded on social media 219 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:46,760 Speaker 1: or get that serotonin response when we get the accolade. 220 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:49,440 Speaker 1: So there are many finish lines for me, and whether 221 00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:52,760 Speaker 1: it's something iterative like putting a little bit of heavier 222 00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:55,600 Speaker 1: weight on the barbell, whether it's major, you know, betting 223 00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:58,880 Speaker 1: on myself and submitting a book proposal or something like that, Well, 224 00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:00,920 Speaker 1: can we start back from the beginning. So one of 225 00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:04,239 Speaker 1: the biggest goals that people would see from the outside, 226 00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:08,199 Speaker 1: is that you had a complete and total I'm not complete. 227 00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:10,520 Speaker 1: I mean, you're you're using your legal skills every day. 228 00:14:10,559 --> 00:14:14,160 Speaker 1: But you had a very big pivot, And can you 229 00:14:14,200 --> 00:14:16,520 Speaker 1: just tell us a little bit about that time in 230 00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:19,720 Speaker 1: your life, because I'm assuming that some of the things 231 00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:25,040 Speaker 1: were probably scary and hard and boring, but also very 232 00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:27,840 Speaker 1: exciting as you start building a new this new life, 233 00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:32,000 Speaker 1: you're now inspiring us all to live. We stand a 234 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:38,320 Speaker 1: lawyer pivot, don't we eat? Yeah? Reformed lawyers over here. Yeah, 235 00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:40,160 Speaker 1: I do use my law degree every day, so I 236 00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:42,720 Speaker 1: don't regret a moment of any of it. Yeah. I 237 00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:45,040 Speaker 1: practiced for almost eight years as a corporate lated getter 238 00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:48,040 Speaker 1: in New York City, and I was in the grind. 239 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:50,320 Speaker 1: I was in the hustle eighty hours a week, and 240 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:54,800 Speaker 1: I actually didn't hate it. My story arc is not hated. 241 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:57,840 Speaker 1: My life created a better one. It was I thought 242 00:14:57,880 --> 00:15:00,880 Speaker 1: my life was just okay. Realized that the lazy mediocrity 243 00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:03,320 Speaker 1: or not the standard by which I do anything. So 244 00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:05,080 Speaker 1: how could I be spending the majority of my life 245 00:15:05,080 --> 00:15:08,240 Speaker 1: doing that? Then the pivot. But the pivot was a 246 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:12,800 Speaker 1: slow burn. It was a two year process, and I 247 00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:16,320 Speaker 1: set a calendar appointment for ten minutes a day because 248 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:18,360 Speaker 1: we're the first person to tell ourselves that we don't 249 00:15:18,360 --> 00:15:21,000 Speaker 1: have the time. And I love love your philosophy of 250 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,600 Speaker 1: that time is diamonds because it's a non renewable resource 251 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,640 Speaker 1: that we're never going to get back. But at that time, 252 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,000 Speaker 1: I was telling myself, girl, you don't have time to 253 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:29,680 Speaker 1: figure out a new life, like you're just trying to 254 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,520 Speaker 1: get these billables, like you're just trying to pay your 255 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:34,320 Speaker 1: rent like it was. You know, the corporate hustle can 256 00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:36,800 Speaker 1: be can be is very real, and the stories we 257 00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:40,640 Speaker 1: tell ourselves within that paradigm feel like we're never going 258 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:42,840 Speaker 1: to escape, Like it really is a super big, like 259 00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:45,800 Speaker 1: Rapunzel moment. So I started telling myself a different story, 260 00:15:45,840 --> 00:15:49,680 Speaker 1: but the storytelling was very small, and it was in 261 00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:52,080 Speaker 1: ten minute bite sized chunks, and I set account of 262 00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:56,400 Speaker 1: recurring calendar appointment Monday through Friday, and it was block 263 00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:59,400 Speaker 1: time that my EA just didn't even know what I 264 00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:03,200 Speaker 1: was doing. But eventually I told folks that I was meditating, 265 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:07,120 Speaker 1: which some days may have been kind of true, but 266 00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:09,120 Speaker 1: I was like, what, that's the thing that they can't 267 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:11,520 Speaker 1: they won't touch because they don't know anything about so 268 00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:13,960 Speaker 1: I was like, that's my meditation. So anyway, that was 269 00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 1: the way for it for me to that was Unicorn 270 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:18,720 Speaker 1: time that I carved out Unicorn space. I didn't call 271 00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:20,920 Speaker 1: it that, of course, because we hadn't met yet. But 272 00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:23,840 Speaker 1: in the beginning, it was like I set set a 273 00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:28,520 Speaker 1: timer and just write pen to paper like something, well, 274 00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:30,000 Speaker 1: how do you want to feel in your new life? 275 00:16:30,080 --> 00:16:33,000 Speaker 1: Like who can you contact? Like what can you google? Like? 276 00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:36,560 Speaker 1: It was really simplistic. There wasn't a manual. I just 277 00:16:36,640 --> 00:16:39,800 Speaker 1: allowed myself, you know what ultimately became hours of time 278 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:44,760 Speaker 1: cumulatively to dream and then I put those dreams into plans. 279 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:50,520 Speaker 1: So you probably were an incredible corporate litigator and now 280 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,840 Speaker 1: you are at this, you know, larger than life, peloton 281 00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:59,760 Speaker 1: ambassador and a wife and a mom and even hates 282 00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:02,720 Speaker 1: the word balance and it always makes me laugh because 283 00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:05,119 Speaker 1: she eats that word and I use it pretty often 284 00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:09,199 Speaker 1: in my daily life right work life balance and professional 285 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:12,560 Speaker 1: personal balance. I would love to know what you think 286 00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:14,760 Speaker 1: of that word, because when I look at you, you 287 00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:19,080 Speaker 1: have mastered that thing. Um. I will have to remember 288 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:21,199 Speaker 1: this conversation on the many, many moments when I do 289 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:25,280 Speaker 1: not feel like I'm good at anything. Um, I agree. 290 00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:30,800 Speaker 1: I bristle at the word balance. I instead believe that 291 00:17:30,920 --> 00:17:35,400 Speaker 1: I have priorities, and I'm either in alignment with those 292 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:38,840 Speaker 1: priorities or I'm not. I have a very short list 293 00:17:38,880 --> 00:17:44,040 Speaker 1: of things actually that you listen family, business, priorities, friendships, 294 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:47,359 Speaker 1: and that's kind of like everything else just falls. So 295 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:50,239 Speaker 1: I don't believe in balance, but I I live, like 296 00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:55,719 Speaker 1: unapologetically in alignment with my priorities. And sometimes my priorities shift, 297 00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:58,520 Speaker 1: and I choose my primary identity in any given moment. 298 00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:02,399 Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm an executive, sometimes I'm an entrepreneur. Of course, 299 00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:04,320 Speaker 1: on the back like I'm always a mom, I'm always 300 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:06,960 Speaker 1: a wife. I don't relinquish those parts of myself, but 301 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:10,800 Speaker 1: I give myself freedom to say this is just going 302 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:13,439 Speaker 1: to be put here for the next hour, ninety minutes, 303 00:18:13,480 --> 00:18:18,040 Speaker 1: two days, whatever, and I'm going to allow this other 304 00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,480 Speaker 1: part of my identity to be the tip of the spear. 305 00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:27,600 Speaker 1: And that has given me so much freedom to then 306 00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:30,000 Speaker 1: use a work back approach. It's like, Okay, if these 307 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:34,040 Speaker 1: are my values, then how do I feel my dates? 308 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:37,240 Speaker 1: And I center my values and how I feel my days, 309 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:40,199 Speaker 1: and so yes, I feel fulfilled. I do feel like 310 00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:44,280 Speaker 1: I have appropriate balance by my own definition of success, 311 00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:48,360 Speaker 1: but it does require enough critical thinking for folks who 312 00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:50,960 Speaker 1: use that in their own lives. The blueprint only works 313 00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:53,879 Speaker 1: if you listen to yourself long enough to know what 314 00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:56,919 Speaker 1: what the priorities are, and then continue to listen to 315 00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:59,879 Speaker 1: yourself to know if you are in alignment or not. 316 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:02,640 Speaker 1: And when I'm not in alignment, that's when I get 317 00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:05,280 Speaker 1: that sticky feeling in my gut and I start to resent, 318 00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:07,879 Speaker 1: if I start to resent appointments, if I start to 319 00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:11,359 Speaker 1: resent these things that I used to love and uh something, 320 00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:14,760 Speaker 1: something's gotten askew what I love about that? Yes, I 321 00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:17,800 Speaker 1: was gonna say it's balance is not a terrible word 322 00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:19,679 Speaker 1: in it of itself, but I think the problem is 323 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:22,239 Speaker 1: so many people think of it as an input. And 324 00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:25,359 Speaker 1: what Robin taught me is that it's an output, the 325 00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:28,320 Speaker 1: same way that happiness is an output, the same way 326 00:19:28,359 --> 00:19:31,400 Speaker 1: that jealousy is an output. That when you're doing something 327 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:35,239 Speaker 1: those feelings you pay attention to them, or again when 328 00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:37,439 Speaker 1: you do other things, like when you're in alignment with 329 00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:41,280 Speaker 1: your priorities, balance does follow or a version of being 330 00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:44,800 Speaker 1: able to feel really good in your decision making follows 331 00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:48,560 Speaker 1: because you've set in motion the way you make decisions 332 00:19:49,119 --> 00:19:51,800 Speaker 1: through your values based lens, which is something that I've 333 00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:56,120 Speaker 1: always really admired about you, Robin. And also I think 334 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:59,040 Speaker 1: that the beauty of you using a values based lens 335 00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:01,160 Speaker 1: to how you live your life is that it doesn't 336 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:04,679 Speaker 1: hurt your life. So many people think, well, you know what, 337 00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:07,120 Speaker 1: if I really think about my own values, maybe they're 338 00:20:07,119 --> 00:20:09,600 Speaker 1: not what society wants from me. But look at what 339 00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:12,600 Speaker 1: society is giving you back. I mean, they see your authenticity, 340 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,879 Speaker 1: they see you living by your values, and then people 341 00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:18,960 Speaker 1: want to follow your lead, which I think is really beautiful. 342 00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:23,480 Speaker 1: So let's talk a little bit about those small steps. 343 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,359 Speaker 1: One of my favorite small steps that you took was 344 00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:31,000 Speaker 1: cold calling the CEO or the owner of Peloton, way 345 00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,760 Speaker 1: back when before people knew it was a household name. 346 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:35,960 Speaker 1: So can you tell us a little bit about that 347 00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:38,120 Speaker 1: space in your life? How did you have the courage 348 00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:40,520 Speaker 1: to do that? What made you even think about this 349 00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:43,480 Speaker 1: particular company, Like I always think about that when I'm 350 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:45,320 Speaker 1: going to do something hard. I'm like, well, if Robin 351 00:20:45,359 --> 00:20:49,159 Speaker 1: can call called Peloton, like I can talk to my 352 00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,320 Speaker 1: editor about a third book. So you always you give 353 00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:54,600 Speaker 1: me a lot of inspiration. Oh wow, well thanks, thank 354 00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:56,479 Speaker 1: you for that. And yes, third book, we're here for it. 355 00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,879 Speaker 1: So I started with a vision board. I had already 356 00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:02,480 Speaker 1: left my law firm and I was working on my book. 357 00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:05,960 Speaker 1: I was coaching runners, and I thought, gosh, what is 358 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:09,479 Speaker 1: my next step? Like there's so many checks coming in. 359 00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,880 Speaker 1: I don't know what is my next step. And I've 360 00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:15,840 Speaker 1: never gone wrong when I bet on myself. And the 361 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:20,560 Speaker 1: vision board had a quadrant that was about business and 362 00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:22,800 Speaker 1: business partnerships, and that's not the one thing I had 363 00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:26,800 Speaker 1: really contemplated. I understood business as like these business folks 364 00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,560 Speaker 1: are my clients. And I thought, oh wait, I have 365 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:31,359 Speaker 1: to smash all the paradigms, like I am here on 366 00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:35,479 Speaker 1: this earth to smash the paradigms. And so I thought, 367 00:21:35,520 --> 00:21:37,840 Speaker 1: what if there's a new construct of ways that I 368 00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:41,680 Speaker 1: can partner being myself and I am the brand, partnering 369 00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:44,239 Speaker 1: with the brand. I truly influenci Our marketing was like 370 00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:47,160 Speaker 1: just bubbling up at this time. So for me then 371 00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:50,200 Speaker 1: it was a very revolutionary concept, like I'm the product. 372 00:21:51,200 --> 00:21:56,440 Speaker 1: And then I read a blurb about Polatan in Fast Company. 373 00:21:56,760 --> 00:22:01,000 Speaker 1: I read the then CEO John Foley co found and 374 00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:04,520 Speaker 1: it crystallized for me. Not because I was super techy 375 00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:06,359 Speaker 1: and I knew all this stuff about tech. It was 376 00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:08,480 Speaker 1: because I had put on my vision board that I 377 00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:12,800 Speaker 1: wanted to work for a modern, disruptive company that is 378 00:22:12,840 --> 00:22:16,880 Speaker 1: going to storytell on a global scale. In my mind, 379 00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:18,639 Speaker 1: it was going to be a media company or something. 380 00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:22,040 Speaker 1: I didn't realize that this was gonna be the synergy 381 00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:24,080 Speaker 1: that I was in fact looking for, and so I 382 00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:26,760 Speaker 1: sent a cold email to the info at that I 383 00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:30,199 Speaker 1: found on Google. There were only like twenty employees at 384 00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:34,199 Speaker 1: the time of the company, and literally I emailed on 385 00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:37,520 Speaker 1: a Monday. I had a audition on a Wednesday, and 386 00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:41,000 Speaker 1: I had a contract the following week. Use this word 387 00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:45,080 Speaker 1: to describe yourself, unapologetic, and I can't think of a 388 00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:50,040 Speaker 1: better word to describe you as a person. How can 389 00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:53,800 Speaker 1: we get there? How can we get that? Robin arzan 390 00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:59,040 Speaker 1: juju uh, Little by little amounts to a lot right 391 00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:02,800 Speaker 1: using your voice even when it shakes, It's wearing the 392 00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:05,560 Speaker 1: thing that makes you feel good. It's I mean that 393 00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:07,320 Speaker 1: this is a big one, but it's like knowing you're 394 00:23:07,359 --> 00:23:10,000 Speaker 1: worth and adding tax. It's asking for the raise, it's 395 00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:13,800 Speaker 1: creating a boundary around your time. It's taking the long 396 00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:16,679 Speaker 1: way home because you feel like it's it's those little 397 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,520 Speaker 1: moments when we when we feel like we're flexing, when 398 00:23:19,560 --> 00:23:22,280 Speaker 1: we feel like we're being bold, But really that's just 399 00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:26,840 Speaker 1: developing that will power muscle. It's developing that confidence muscle. 400 00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,919 Speaker 1: And I also do believe that a lot of my 401 00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:33,840 Speaker 1: confidence stems from the physical embodiment of living in this skin. 402 00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:37,960 Speaker 1: And I'm competitive with myself, right, and that confidence is 403 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:41,720 Speaker 1: a side effect of my hustle. And now I'm in 404 00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:44,800 Speaker 1: a different chapter where I also recognize that slowing down 405 00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:47,440 Speaker 1: is a strength. You know, postpartum, I had to slow 406 00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:50,760 Speaker 1: down and I had to discover new parts of my 407 00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:54,280 Speaker 1: identity and new parts of my self worth. And that's 408 00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:57,919 Speaker 1: been really refreshing and beautiful. And so now sometimes my 409 00:23:58,040 --> 00:24:01,800 Speaker 1: internal flex is, you know, thing the equivalent of my 410 00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,719 Speaker 1: body weight over my head, you know, on a barbell. 411 00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:05,960 Speaker 1: And then sometimes the subtle flex is like I'm gonna 412 00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:07,679 Speaker 1: sitting here and do absolutely nothing. And I don't have 413 00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:11,560 Speaker 1: this claimant to any of y'all. And so I guess 414 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:15,520 Speaker 1: the advice, you know, is think about the small moments 415 00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:20,400 Speaker 1: where you feel like you're betting on yourself. I actually 416 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:26,600 Speaker 1: envision like Robin, Robin looking back and be like, yes, girl, 417 00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:28,920 Speaker 1: that was the whisper that you needed to turn into 418 00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:31,440 Speaker 1: a roar. And so it's like, how can we carve 419 00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:33,639 Speaker 1: out those little moments where we can actually listen to 420 00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:37,199 Speaker 1: ourselves and we can champion ourselves in those small ways. So, 421 00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:40,480 Speaker 1: whether it's scheduling the workout, whether it's taking the time 422 00:24:40,920 --> 00:24:44,160 Speaker 1: fifteen minutes to make the painting, to Google to pick 423 00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:46,919 Speaker 1: out colors, pick out the paint, do the ten minute 424 00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,480 Speaker 1: thing where you're betting on yourself, and then we get 425 00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:52,440 Speaker 1: used to betting on ourselves. And you know, I would say, 426 00:24:52,520 --> 00:24:55,880 Speaker 1: especially for caregivers out there, we have to model this behavior. 427 00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:59,040 Speaker 1: We have to Nobody who is living, you know in 428 00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:02,840 Speaker 1: our ecosystems should have to wait sixty years to realize 429 00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:04,679 Speaker 1: a dream. It's like, we have the ability to do 430 00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:08,480 Speaker 1: that now. So let's start practicing on ourselves and modeling 431 00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:10,520 Speaker 1: it not only for the little ones, but the adults 432 00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:13,000 Speaker 1: in our lives too. Like, you never know who is 433 00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:15,199 Speaker 1: going to be inspired by your story. You could be 434 00:25:15,240 --> 00:25:18,960 Speaker 1: someone's survival guide one day, strong mama, So let's talk 435 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:22,520 Speaker 1: about that as a survival guide. It's a really beautiful book. 436 00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:26,160 Speaker 1: It's a a new children's book that you just put 437 00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:29,439 Speaker 1: out into the world that is a survival guide and 438 00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:33,399 Speaker 1: that it's an ability to connect with the next generation. 439 00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:36,639 Speaker 1: And I want you to tell people about what inspired 440 00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:39,600 Speaker 1: you to write a children's book in addition to all 441 00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:42,760 Speaker 1: the other things you're doing. Amazing things you're doing. But 442 00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:45,680 Speaker 1: I will say I went through my library of children's 443 00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:49,840 Speaker 1: books and I was trying to find other children's books 444 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:54,280 Speaker 1: that actually focused on the caregiver, the parent, as opposed 445 00:25:54,359 --> 00:25:57,679 Speaker 1: to centering the child as the be all end all, 446 00:25:57,800 --> 00:26:00,840 Speaker 1: and there really aren't very any and so that's what 447 00:26:00,920 --> 00:26:03,840 Speaker 1: I love so much. It doesn't say strong child and 448 00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:06,199 Speaker 1: I'm going to help you be that. It's a strong mama, 449 00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:08,239 Speaker 1: And that's intentional. So can you talk a little bit 450 00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:12,280 Speaker 1: about this survival guide for the next generation? Yeah, so 451 00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:15,399 Speaker 1: strong mama. Really, the genesis of it was it was 452 00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:19,159 Speaker 1: a conversation I was having with myself and it was, gosh, like, 453 00:26:19,560 --> 00:26:22,560 Speaker 1: how do you remember the strength of this moment when 454 00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:27,119 Speaker 1: you are creating life? And I really I thought, you know, 455 00:26:27,160 --> 00:26:30,440 Speaker 1: baby Athena and my belly was my workout partner and 456 00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:32,760 Speaker 1: we were doing these things together, and I thought, how 457 00:26:32,800 --> 00:26:37,520 Speaker 1: are you going to teach them about these critical self 458 00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:41,119 Speaker 1: care moments? That movement is medicine and self care isn't selfish? 459 00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:43,480 Speaker 1: What teachable things like? How are you going to teach 460 00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:47,200 Speaker 1: this value? Of course, by example? But then I envisioned 461 00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:50,320 Speaker 1: myself sitting next to my kid and being like, this 462 00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:53,280 Speaker 1: is why mommy went out a two hour run over 463 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:56,320 Speaker 1: the weekend, because I must take care of myself in 464 00:26:56,440 --> 00:27:00,959 Speaker 1: order to take care of you. And the beauty of 465 00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:05,159 Speaker 1: having the caregiver be the center of that story is 466 00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:08,040 Speaker 1: that I think it enables all of us to have 467 00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:11,920 Speaker 1: these conversations about these concepts with kids, so then they 468 00:27:12,040 --> 00:27:15,400 Speaker 1: can realize when they should also be utilizing the same 469 00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:18,840 Speaker 1: tool kit of movement as medicine, and self care is 470 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:23,040 Speaker 1: something that should be really revered and respected. Well, then 471 00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:27,080 Speaker 1: if we can move on to this idea of practical 472 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:31,080 Speaker 1: steps for people who are just getting started, who are 473 00:27:31,119 --> 00:27:35,600 Speaker 1: just now realizing they can't do this anymore, that burnout 474 00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:39,040 Speaker 1: has reached an all time high for them, They can't 475 00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:42,919 Speaker 1: live this way anymore. What would you say is a 476 00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:46,160 Speaker 1: good place to start? I guess it's like a four 477 00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:49,440 Speaker 1: pronged approach, A movement practice is crucial, Like I think 478 00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:53,240 Speaker 1: a movement practice physically metabolizes, you know, not I don't 479 00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:55,640 Speaker 1: mean calories, I mean like emotions, like you know, there's 480 00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:58,520 Speaker 1: just stress and stuff and gunk and news feeds. We 481 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:00,680 Speaker 1: have to be able to move. So in any way 482 00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:04,080 Speaker 1: that you can move, it feels good to move. Develop 483 00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:05,960 Speaker 1: a movement practice, even if it's ten minutes a day. 484 00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:08,639 Speaker 1: And then that goes to the second piece of my 485 00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:11,440 Speaker 1: four product approach, which is that I have a monster 486 00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:14,359 Speaker 1: mirror moment, Like I have like a moment where I 487 00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:16,359 Speaker 1: looked myself in my eyes in the mirror and I 488 00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:18,719 Speaker 1: bang on my chest and I just talked to myself. 489 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:20,920 Speaker 1: And at first it was really weird, but I developed 490 00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:23,720 Speaker 1: this as preparing for race day, and I realized that 491 00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:27,359 Speaker 1: in the race corrals I would get so nervous because 492 00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:30,000 Speaker 1: you know, there's just a phrenetic energy, you know, I 493 00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:32,639 Speaker 1: needed like a positive trigger and for that that like 494 00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:35,119 Speaker 1: banging on my chest, like I still do that for 495 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,840 Speaker 1: almost every Palton class. Actually, um so I would say 496 00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,640 Speaker 1: a self talk moment, whether that's more contemplative and you 497 00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:43,200 Speaker 1: consider that more of a meditation moment, but I actually 498 00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:46,560 Speaker 1: think like looking yourself in the iyron mirror is powerful 499 00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:49,600 Speaker 1: as hell. So this let's dial into our self talk 500 00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:53,960 Speaker 1: and maybe develop some positive triggers around that conversation, because 501 00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:56,960 Speaker 1: it's the most important conversation we're gonna have. I guess 502 00:28:56,960 --> 00:29:01,760 Speaker 1: in the last two are pretty straightforward. It's owning your 503 00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:05,720 Speaker 1: note to protect your yes. It's actually practicing the full sentence. 504 00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:11,240 Speaker 1: That is an oh no without explanation, without apology. That's it. 505 00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:14,920 Speaker 1: It's a no no. And we're just going to make 506 00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:16,280 Speaker 1: ways and they're just gonna have to learn how to 507 00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:19,120 Speaker 1: swim like I just cannot. It's so no. And then 508 00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:24,240 Speaker 1: the fourth is an interesting I guess compliments. That is 509 00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:27,239 Speaker 1: I really try to put a gratitude lens on a 510 00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:30,520 Speaker 1: lot of what I do. I asked myself often, what 511 00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:34,600 Speaker 1: is it that you used to wish for prey, for hustle, 512 00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:36,720 Speaker 1: for vision board four that you have right now that 513 00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:39,160 Speaker 1: might even annoy you? You know, I'm sitting in my 514 00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:42,200 Speaker 1: beautiful home and then something on the sink breaks and 515 00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:45,360 Speaker 1: I'm like, and it's like, you gotta you gotta dishwasher, honey, 516 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:47,959 Speaker 1: Like you live in New York, got you better comment 517 00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:50,240 Speaker 1: all the way down, you know, So there's I try 518 00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:53,840 Speaker 1: to put that gratitude lens. Often we are onto the 519 00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:55,479 Speaker 1: next thing, We're onto the next finish line, we're onto 520 00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:56,960 Speaker 1: the next victory. And when this whole thing is about 521 00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:59,320 Speaker 1: goal setting, rights like goals are incredible, we have to 522 00:29:59,320 --> 00:30:01,720 Speaker 1: take time to sell the tiny victories. And I do 523 00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:05,080 Speaker 1: try to have that gratitude moment. Sometimes it's in a 524 00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:07,880 Speaker 1: journal I love journaling, but oftentimes it is just like 525 00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:11,120 Speaker 1: that check, like you need to check yourself because somebody 526 00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,400 Speaker 1: would take your problems and call them blessings right now. 527 00:30:14,160 --> 00:30:16,600 Speaker 1: But what it's so important about what you're saying, because 528 00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:19,920 Speaker 1: I do think that the idea of goal setting is 529 00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:23,920 Speaker 1: so forward thinking, possibly right, that I don't want people 530 00:30:23,920 --> 00:30:25,959 Speaker 1: to lose sight of the fact that we're not saying 531 00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,000 Speaker 1: you always have to be moving forward, you always have 532 00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,680 Speaker 1: to have something new, You always have to necessarily be 533 00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:35,080 Speaker 1: productive in the same way that maybe a capitalist patriarchy 534 00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:38,360 Speaker 1: would think of you as productive. But I do think 535 00:30:38,360 --> 00:30:42,320 Speaker 1: it's really interesting that part of goal setting, even in 536 00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:46,600 Speaker 1: your framework about where to start, is looking back at 537 00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:48,520 Speaker 1: things that you have accomplished. And I can can you 538 00:30:48,560 --> 00:30:50,360 Speaker 1: talk a little bit about that, What do you look 539 00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:53,360 Speaker 1: back on and you say, I can't believe I did that. 540 00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:57,080 Speaker 1: Oh that's part of my favorite So I call it 541 00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:59,680 Speaker 1: creating a mental movie reel. You know how like movies 542 00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:01,920 Speaker 1: have sizzle reels, Right, It'll be like thirty seconds of 543 00:31:01,960 --> 00:31:05,080 Speaker 1: like the most amazing clips of the next superhero movie. 544 00:31:05,440 --> 00:31:07,160 Speaker 1: And I thought when I was preparing for my first 545 00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:10,160 Speaker 1: ultra marathon, I thought, oh, but like I'm living all that, 546 00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:14,280 Speaker 1: Like I'm like living that, So why should we create 547 00:31:14,360 --> 00:31:18,120 Speaker 1: our own superhero movie reels? And it could be the 548 00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:21,760 Speaker 1: small like the small moments where you flex, the small 549 00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:24,320 Speaker 1: moments where you bet on yourself, whether it is like 550 00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:27,600 Speaker 1: an actual workout, or whether it's you know, speaking up 551 00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:30,440 Speaker 1: in the meeting, whether it's not apologizing for taking a 552 00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:34,440 Speaker 1: day off, whether it's asking your partner, collaborator, whoever it is, 553 00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:36,680 Speaker 1: to be like, yeah, you can take this one today 554 00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:40,160 Speaker 1: and asking for what you need. The world needs us 555 00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:43,080 Speaker 1: to tell our stories. We need us to tell our stories. 556 00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:47,360 Speaker 1: And I think in looking bath, you realize that you've 557 00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:49,880 Speaker 1: survived all of it, You survived a hundred percent of 558 00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:52,840 Speaker 1: your worst days and despite it all, you're still here. 559 00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:54,640 Speaker 1: But now you have that story to tell, Like what 560 00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:57,080 Speaker 1: was it all worth? If you can't now tell yourself 561 00:31:57,160 --> 00:31:59,560 Speaker 1: the story that you are the hero in it. Take 562 00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:01,800 Speaker 1: it with you, so you know, A practical application of 563 00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:05,800 Speaker 1: that is picking three, four or five of those winds 564 00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:08,920 Speaker 1: and actually creating a visualization practice around it, like I 565 00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:12,840 Speaker 1: have a visualization of practice around my training winds leading 566 00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:14,560 Speaker 1: up to race day, and then I also have some 567 00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:16,360 Speaker 1: as it relates to business, some as it relates to 568 00:32:16,360 --> 00:32:20,720 Speaker 1: personal relationships. Just to conjure and remind myself of that 569 00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:23,000 Speaker 1: I am already listen, I'm already funding the script. I'm 570 00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:25,360 Speaker 1: already living it, Like I might as well write something 571 00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:28,880 Speaker 1: that I'm going to watch so good. I'm like it 572 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:32,200 Speaker 1: would be in my real to me when I hear 573 00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:34,760 Speaker 1: you with all of these tips and tricks and these 574 00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:39,200 Speaker 1: daily strategies, there is so much good science behind every 575 00:32:39,240 --> 00:32:43,440 Speaker 1: single thing that you are doing for yourself, suggesting to others, 576 00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:46,880 Speaker 1: and in my mind, you have cracked the code for 577 00:32:47,360 --> 00:32:51,040 Speaker 1: living a more authentic life, a life that's really centered 578 00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:54,640 Speaker 1: on longevity. Right for people who are earlier on in 579 00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:57,680 Speaker 1: their journey to really having a life of impact that 580 00:32:57,760 --> 00:33:01,520 Speaker 1: they want. What can people do early on in when 581 00:33:01,560 --> 00:33:04,920 Speaker 1: they get those whispers like you say, how can they 582 00:33:05,040 --> 00:33:08,440 Speaker 1: chase that to make it into our roar so that 583 00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:12,360 Speaker 1: they can act and live their truest, most authentic self. 584 00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:17,840 Speaker 1: One of my most profound and most recent mantras was 585 00:33:17,920 --> 00:33:24,240 Speaker 1: postpartum consistency over intensity, because I am so apt to 586 00:33:24,360 --> 00:33:27,440 Speaker 1: go hard and intense and like I will be there forever, 587 00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:31,160 Speaker 1: I will be in the in the dark, just like grinding, 588 00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:35,080 Speaker 1: but that that that's not always certainly not the spirit 589 00:33:35,160 --> 00:33:37,000 Speaker 1: of what we're trying to build, right, Like, that's not 590 00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:39,280 Speaker 1: the energy that we need to put into every single thing. 591 00:33:39,760 --> 00:33:41,480 Speaker 1: And I certainly couldn't do it physically, you know, I 592 00:33:41,480 --> 00:33:45,440 Speaker 1: obviously couldn't do that postpartum. So consistency over intensity became 593 00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:47,800 Speaker 1: a really important, profound mantra for me. And I would 594 00:33:47,840 --> 00:33:52,080 Speaker 1: say that that is really applicable to the beginning of 595 00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:58,560 Speaker 1: any journey and what small iterative steps I'm talking like 596 00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:03,160 Speaker 1: be the person and who did five minutes a day 597 00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:10,480 Speaker 1: like that actually chemically changes, not only like you want 598 00:34:10,480 --> 00:34:13,160 Speaker 1: a cellular level, but then you start telling the story 599 00:34:13,360 --> 00:34:16,600 Speaker 1: to yourself that I am the person that does this 600 00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:22,719 Speaker 1: every every day. I am this person, right and and 601 00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:25,880 Speaker 1: I hide it behind pretending it's meditation in my office. 602 00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:29,560 Speaker 1: But it doesn't matter but but that, but consistency over intensity, 603 00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:32,080 Speaker 1: because especially because we we do see a lot of 604 00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:34,319 Speaker 1: other people's highlight reels, we do see a lot of 605 00:34:34,360 --> 00:34:38,080 Speaker 1: sizzle reels, and we're under this impression that we need 606 00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:41,279 Speaker 1: to go all in and it's hard in the pain 607 00:34:41,440 --> 00:34:43,680 Speaker 1: and it's throwing the books off the desk and quitting 608 00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:46,960 Speaker 1: the job. It's not that sweeping aim for something that 609 00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:50,560 Speaker 1: you can do consistently. That is moving the needle slightly 610 00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:53,279 Speaker 1: closer to the person you want to be and how 611 00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:55,960 Speaker 1: you want to feel when you get there. So funny 612 00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:58,520 Speaker 1: you just said that because I just I screenshot this 613 00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:02,359 Speaker 1: woman who said this morning, I'm just showing you this 614 00:35:02,400 --> 00:35:04,640 Speaker 1: thing because it just reminded me of that. She said, Hi, Eve, 615 00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:07,080 Speaker 1: I want to share how meaningful Unicorn Space has been 616 00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:08,719 Speaker 1: for me. I have a two year old and a 617 00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:10,680 Speaker 1: four month old. My husband is a basketball coach, and 618 00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:12,960 Speaker 1: I've been doing most of the parenting and housekeeping. I 619 00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:15,360 Speaker 1: was going through one of the worst oppressive episodes I've had. 620 00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:18,360 Speaker 1: I started to listen to Unicorn Space and I discovered 621 00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:21,840 Speaker 1: a heel's dance class. I didn't even know what that was. Actually, 622 00:35:22,080 --> 00:35:23,920 Speaker 1: I have a bone spur and like a Bunyan. So 623 00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:27,239 Speaker 1: I couldn't do that from dance, but I'm assuming that's 624 00:35:27,320 --> 00:35:29,640 Speaker 1: dancing in heels. It's become a unicorn space, and I 625 00:35:29,680 --> 00:35:32,399 Speaker 1: love how empowered and film I feel there. I don't 626 00:35:32,400 --> 00:35:35,879 Speaker 1: think I would have ever considered going. So, I mean, 627 00:35:36,360 --> 00:35:39,239 Speaker 1: that's not that transformative, but it sounds like it changed 628 00:35:39,239 --> 00:35:42,239 Speaker 1: her whole life. Right, she just signed up for one 629 00:35:42,360 --> 00:35:45,640 Speaker 1: heel's dance class. Right, you may just be on a 630 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,399 Speaker 1: ride with you and that starts to change things, but 631 00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:52,759 Speaker 1: it's not the heels dance class. So I was wondering, like, what, like, 632 00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:55,600 Speaker 1: what do you see the people that you coach or 633 00:35:55,640 --> 00:35:58,480 Speaker 1: that are in your audience, Like those types of people 634 00:35:58,480 --> 00:36:00,400 Speaker 1: who say I did this, I signed up for the 635 00:36:00,440 --> 00:36:04,920 Speaker 1: Hills dance class and it's changed my life. What is that? 636 00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:09,840 Speaker 1: What are Is it confidence that they get? Is it introspection? 637 00:36:10,600 --> 00:36:13,239 Speaker 1: What do you think is happening to them in that 638 00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:16,399 Speaker 1: process on a cellular level, or what do you see? Yeah, 639 00:36:16,440 --> 00:36:18,719 Speaker 1: I mean obviously there's like the physiological chemical stuff that 640 00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:21,480 Speaker 1: happens with movement, But the corrupx of it for me 641 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:27,920 Speaker 1: is we put ourselves in a scenario where we can 642 00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:32,560 Speaker 1: answer the question why not meet whether it's it's a 643 00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:35,080 Speaker 1: curiosity of what like, can I lift my leg a 644 00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:38,600 Speaker 1: little higher in this dance move? Can I master this step? 645 00:36:38,680 --> 00:36:41,160 Speaker 1: Can I pick up this weight? Can I run this distance? 646 00:36:41,480 --> 00:36:43,520 Speaker 1: Can I meet a friend on the leader board? You know, 647 00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:45,239 Speaker 1: it's not always based on the metrics and the and 648 00:36:45,320 --> 00:36:47,720 Speaker 1: all the data points. Sometimes it's based on the feeling 649 00:36:47,719 --> 00:36:50,000 Speaker 1: in the community and the who am I in this? 650 00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:52,840 Speaker 1: And it is that constant questioning of identity. But we 651 00:36:52,920 --> 00:36:56,680 Speaker 1: have all these little opportunities through movement that really are rituals. 652 00:36:56,719 --> 00:36:58,880 Speaker 1: I mean, this is an age old practice where we 653 00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:02,520 Speaker 1: are anchoring ourselves a community and meaning and answering the 654 00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:04,640 Speaker 1: question why not me? So it's like, why not me 655 00:37:04,719 --> 00:37:06,880 Speaker 1: to sign up for the heels dance class? Why not 656 00:37:06,960 --> 00:37:09,160 Speaker 1: me to go to the triathlon training? Put in a 657 00:37:09,280 --> 00:37:12,360 Speaker 1: ten minute core class on peloton? You are a different 658 00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:15,360 Speaker 1: person on the other side, and the deep, deep knowing, 659 00:37:15,640 --> 00:37:18,480 Speaker 1: like the soul that chose your body, knows that you 660 00:37:18,560 --> 00:37:22,719 Speaker 1: did something to create self generated momentum and that is 661 00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:26,640 Speaker 1: life changing. Why not me? Thank you? You are about 662 00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:30,000 Speaker 1: to go teach, so we were you. We're gonna let 663 00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:47,520 Speaker 1: you go, but you're the best. Hi, it's me Eve, 664 00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,040 Speaker 1: I wrote find your Unicorn Space as a permission slip 665 00:37:51,080 --> 00:37:53,359 Speaker 1: for you to reconnect and discover that thing that makes 666 00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:58,480 Speaker 1: you come alive without the guilt, without the excuses. Especially 667 00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:01,600 Speaker 1: in our all too busy world, making time for ourselves 668 00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:05,640 Speaker 1: is essential work. It improves our health, our relationships, and 669 00:38:05,680 --> 00:38:09,000 Speaker 1: it just might be the antidote to burnout. Join me 670 00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:12,880 Speaker 1: on a journey to find your unicorn space. Visit unicorn 671 00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:22,880 Speaker 1: space dot com for today's time out. We're going to 672 00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:28,080 Speaker 1: walk you through a four step method for goal setting. One, 673 00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:31,680 Speaker 1: you're going to set your big hairy, audacious authentic goal. 674 00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:36,200 Speaker 1: Write one down. We don't care what it is, whether 675 00:38:36,239 --> 00:38:39,200 Speaker 1: you think you will ever achieve it, just the first 676 00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:42,799 Speaker 1: one you can think of. Write it down. That step one, 677 00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:49,160 Speaker 1: write down a big hairy, audacious authentic goal. Step two 678 00:38:50,520 --> 00:38:55,120 Speaker 1: is gut checking to make sure that it's actually authentic. 679 00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,200 Speaker 1: How do we do that well? When you have a 680 00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:03,920 Speaker 1: big harry dacious authentic goal, that means the goal aligns 681 00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:07,919 Speaker 1: with your value system. So please visit page of Find 682 00:39:07,960 --> 00:39:11,760 Speaker 1: your uniform Space, or go to www dot fair play 683 00:39:11,840 --> 00:39:15,160 Speaker 1: life dot com where you can find a list of values. 684 00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:20,920 Speaker 1: Circle your top three values. Look at your big hairy audacious, 685 00:39:20,960 --> 00:39:26,040 Speaker 1: authentic goal and make sure that it's an alignment with 686 00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:30,120 Speaker 1: those values. So, for me, when I decided to devote 687 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:37,000 Speaker 1: myself two women's economic security for the rest of my life, 688 00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:41,439 Speaker 1: I went and understood that that goal did align very 689 00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:50,080 Speaker 1: deeply with the values that I hold community, fairness, and justice. 690 00:39:51,480 --> 00:39:54,600 Speaker 1: Step three, You're going to start where you are and 691 00:39:54,600 --> 00:39:57,040 Speaker 1: a dity will tell you what that means. Now that 692 00:39:57,080 --> 00:40:02,520 Speaker 1: you've identified your big, hairy, acious, authentic goal and double 693 00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:05,720 Speaker 1: check to make sure that it's authentic and in line 694 00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:10,960 Speaker 1: with your values. Then take a life inventory. What raw 695 00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:14,680 Speaker 1: materials do you already have to get there, what life 696 00:40:14,680 --> 00:40:17,759 Speaker 1: experiences have you had, what resources do you have to 697 00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:22,680 Speaker 1: put into it? And then the last step, what small 698 00:40:23,239 --> 00:40:30,040 Speaker 1: incremental change can you make to bring your big, hairy, audacious, 699 00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:33,160 Speaker 1: authentic goal to life. And so we want to think 700 00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:42,839 Speaker 1: of that small bite size nugget as your smart goal, specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, 701 00:40:43,160 --> 00:40:48,200 Speaker 1: and time based. For Robin, it was small in time, 702 00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:52,040 Speaker 1: ten minute increments that she would put in her calendar 703 00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:55,359 Speaker 1: so she could figure out how she could fulfill her 704 00:40:55,440 --> 00:41:00,759 Speaker 1: dreams and her audacious, authentic goal. And we know all 705 00:41:00,760 --> 00:41:06,200 Speaker 1: of this can feel overwhelming, scary, difficult, and so next 706 00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:11,880 Speaker 1: week is about facing your fears. If this exercise feels 707 00:41:12,760 --> 00:41:19,439 Speaker 1: scary to you or uncomfortable, maybe table it and come 708 00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:23,440 Speaker 1: back to it after you listen to the next episode. 709 00:41:24,719 --> 00:41:27,360 Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to Time Out, a production of 710 00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:31,720 Speaker 1: I Heart Podcasts and Hello Sunshine. I'm Ev Rodsky, author 711 00:41:31,719 --> 00:41:34,200 Speaker 1: of the New York Times bestseller of fair Play and 712 00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:38,040 Speaker 1: Find your Unicorn Space. Follow me on social media at 713 00:41:38,040 --> 00:41:41,279 Speaker 1: Ev Rodsky and learn more about our work at fair 714 00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:45,240 Speaker 1: Play Life. And I'm Dr Add Narucar, a Harvard physician 715 00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:49,080 Speaker 1: with a specialty and stress resilience, burnout, and mental health. 716 00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:53,080 Speaker 1: Follow me on social media at Dr add Narucar and 717 00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:55,360 Speaker 1: find out more about my work at doctor d D 718 00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:57,920 Speaker 1: dot com. That's d R A D I t I 719 00:41:58,120 --> 00:42:01,840 Speaker 1: dot com. Our Hello suns Shine team is Amanda farrand 720 00:42:02,360 --> 00:42:06,880 Speaker 1: Aaron Stover and Jennifer Yonker. Our I Heart Media team 721 00:42:07,040 --> 00:42:11,680 Speaker 1: is Ali Perry, Jennifer Bassett, and Jessica Kranchich. We hope 722 00:42:11,760 --> 00:42:13,799 Speaker 1: you all love taking a much needed time out with 723 00:42:13,880 --> 00:42:17,560 Speaker 1: us today. Listen and subscribe to Time Out on the 724 00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:21,200 Speaker 1: I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get 725 00:42:21,239 --> 00:42:22,000 Speaker 1: your favorite shows.