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Speaker 1: Hey, Professional Homegirls is shagarl Ebine Hair and as always,

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Speaker 1: I am super excited about this week's episode because it

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Speaker 1: is extremely important. My guest opens up about how a

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Speaker 1: girl's night out resulted in life altering consequences leading her

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Speaker 1: to become an amputee. Will explore the impact on her relationships,

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Speaker 1: the challenges of adjusting to life with one arm, and

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Speaker 1: her reflections on accountability while recognizing warning signs from that night.

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Speaker 1: But before we dive in, it's crucial to stress that

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Speaker 1: drinking and driving is both illegal and extremely dangerous. Always

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Speaker 1: prioritize safety and responsibility. Never drink and drive. A girl's

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Speaker 1: night out turn me into an amputee starting out. So

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Speaker 1: to my guests, thank you so much for being on

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Speaker 1: the show.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for inviting me over.

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Speaker 1: Yes, how are you doing? How you feeling?

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Speaker 3: I'm feeling pretty mad, pretty okay, you know, just okay?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, some days today I feel okay, okay.

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Speaker 1: Now, how long has it been since the accident?

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Speaker 2: Last June June fourth of twenty twenty three.

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Speaker 1: Always, it hasn't even been a full year.

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Speaker 3: I can't wait for it to be my anniversary, you know.

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Speaker 3: But no, it hasn't been a full year yet.

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Speaker 1: Are you doing anything for the anniversary?

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Speaker 3: I plan on it because I follow a lady who

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Speaker 3: I see she took like a did a photo shoot

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Speaker 3: and she did it call it her anniversary. So I'm

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Speaker 3: thinking about maybe doing something like that.

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Speaker 2: If not, I may just go to a spot, take

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Speaker 2: myself to a spot. You know.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I look, I was looking at your pictures. I'm like, listen,

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Speaker 1: this is a battie right here now, I know that.

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Speaker 1: I mean, we both know that drunk driving is a

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Speaker 1: sensitive topic for many, So how do you handle interactions

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Speaker 1: with others who may not understand your situation.

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Speaker 3: I mostly a lot of people understand.

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Speaker 2: It's so much often that it used to be.

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Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying, Like you would know somebody

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Speaker 3: that'll know somebody that probably has lost somebody nowadays to

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Speaker 3: drinking and driving or a car accident. So most of

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Speaker 3: them understand the part that they probably don't understand, it's like, wow,

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Speaker 3: you really lost an arm, because that's the part that

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Speaker 3: no one, you know, just think of, like, wow you

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Speaker 3: really lost an arm.

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Speaker 2: Drinking and driving.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's so much happening so often now when people say, oh,

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Speaker 3: you got to a car accident or it was drinking

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Speaker 3: and dry or they always say, you got to a

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Speaker 3: car accident was a person drinking you know, something like that.

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Speaker 1: Right, do you have your views on like alcohol consumption

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Speaker 1: or like social drinking change since the accident?

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Speaker 3: It has, and it should have changed before all of

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Speaker 3: this because we had just lost someone about a year

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Speaker 3: or two it prior.

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Speaker 2: From drinking and driving. Oh wow, yeah, correct, very someone

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Speaker 2: who was very close to me.

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Speaker 3: So we should have had all learned from it, all

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Speaker 3: of us, because it was all someone who was there

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Speaker 3: close to our heart. However, we still went out and

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Speaker 3: drink and drive. But now for sure I don't drink

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Speaker 3: and drive. Even people around me, they're like, no, we're

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Speaker 3: not drinking and driving. We were uber. We were uber

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Speaker 3: because we could have been doing that from the beginning.

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Speaker 3: It was no reason why we didn't. We just did it.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, now we uber. If we're gonna go out,

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Speaker 3: I barely I haven't even really been out, But if

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Speaker 3: I do, I'm uber.

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Speaker 2: I don't care if five minutes is.

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Speaker 1: It hard for you to drink?

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Speaker 2: You know, I don't.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, I've never been like a type of person that

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Speaker 3: drink anyway, you know, unless it was socially, I don't

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Speaker 3: just drink.

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Speaker 2: You know, I.

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Speaker 3: Don't feel like it changed to the point where I

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Speaker 3: say no, I don't want to have a drink. Nothing

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Speaker 3: has really I feel like it may have humbled me more,

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Speaker 3: but far as like some ways, I feel like.

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Speaker 2: No, and no, it didn't take away from that. You know,

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Speaker 2: it didn't take away from.

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Speaker 1: That, right, So walk us through the day, because I

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Speaker 1: know at first it was a cute girls night out.

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Speaker 1: So y'all was outside having a good time, looking good.

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Speaker 1: So tell us that day.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I believe I went and got my hair done.

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Speaker 3: Okay, we probably already planned that day ahead of time,

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Speaker 3: I'm sure. And yeah, we went out, We got ready

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Speaker 3: to go out, and yeah that was we headed to

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Speaker 3: the headed to the bar, headed to the bar.

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Speaker 2: We all got nice and got dressed and hit it

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Speaker 2: to the bar.

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Speaker 1: Right now, if I'm not mistaken, y'all was leaving to

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Speaker 1: go somewhere else after the first bar, like y'all was

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Speaker 1: just going to bar.

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Speaker 3: Hop, Well, we was gonna go home first, if I

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Speaker 3: could recall, we was going home first because I believe

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Speaker 3: we were going home for something so someone could change.

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Speaker 3: So we were headed back home first before we were

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Speaker 3: going to the next bar.

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Speaker 1: Now, did you notice anything about the driver? Come assume

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Speaker 1: the driving with your friend or your cousin or somebody.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, she was my cousin, But honestly, she is a

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Speaker 3: person who drives forty miles per hour, like she takes

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Speaker 3: the streetway instead of expressway. So for me, as long

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Speaker 3: as we've been driving down here, I thought none of it.

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Speaker 3: She been driving all the you know, all our all

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Speaker 3: the time we've been here in Michigan, I mean Georgia,

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Speaker 3: because we're from Michigan. So I literally I thought none

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Speaker 3: of it.

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Speaker 2: I didn't.

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Speaker 3: I didn't get in our car thinking we were gonna

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Speaker 3: rate or she was under the influence where she couldn't drive.

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Speaker 1: Right? Did the accident happen while you want to wait

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Speaker 1: to the house and after leaving the house on the.

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Speaker 3: Way to the house about four minutes from the house,

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Speaker 3: and byly about ten minutes from the bar.

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Speaker 1: Wow, were y'all drinking like that?

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Speaker 3: Like, honestly, we were drinking. I know we probably had

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Speaker 3: a couple of shots at the bar, right, but I'm

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Speaker 3: not sure, you know, I just I don't know.

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Speaker 2: We've been like we you know, we drink, we go out,

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Speaker 2: we have to right.

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Speaker 3: It ain't nothing new, you know, So it was just

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Speaker 3: I just didn't I didn't expect all that to go

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Speaker 3: around the way it did.

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Speaker 1: Because I do feel like that's very common. Like people

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Speaker 1: go out, they have a couple of drinks. You know,

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Speaker 1: you ask the person that's driving you good you can drive,

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Speaker 1: like especially if this the Designator's driver that always driving

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Speaker 1: like you said, she drives.

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Speaker 2: Wow, I'm usually always the desonator driver. That's the queenky deky.

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Speaker 3: Oh wow, Yes, I am usually always the desonatd driver.

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Speaker 2: Literally, always have been for years. I probably have.

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Speaker 3: This might have been like the fourth or fifth time

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Speaker 3: since we've been here that she was the designator driver,

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Speaker 3: honestly being real.

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Speaker 1: So why you didn't drive that night? Did something happened?

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Speaker 2: Yes?

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Speaker 3: When I got you know, you know when you start

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Speaker 3: thinking about all the signs. First of all, I had

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Speaker 3: just got back from Puerto Rico, and my little brother

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Speaker 3: had had my car, and when I got ready to

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Speaker 3: I had not got in my car since I got back.

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Speaker 3: When I got ready to go out, my car would

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Speaker 3: not start. So my little brother had my car, but

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Speaker 3: he didn't tell me that it didn't start. So that's

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Speaker 3: why I ended up hopping in like a little HOOTI

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Speaker 3: another car that I ended up having, And when we

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Speaker 3: got out, he was like, we ain't driving your car.

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Speaker 2: You know, we're gonna drive right right, So that's why

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Speaker 2: we I ended up in her car that night.

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Speaker 1: Wow, So not only were you you're always Dosney a driver,

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Speaker 1: but then your car would start correct correct, that's crazy.

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Speaker 3: Exactly exactly. And it was so many signs. Then I

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Speaker 3: got to the gas station. I had had this car

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Speaker 3: for so many years, I forgot how to put gas

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Speaker 3: in it. Like, it was just so many signs. I

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Speaker 3: felt like that was just slowing me down, slowing me down.

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Speaker 3: I was like, no, I'm going, I'm going.

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Speaker 1: Wow, what were the other signs that you notice?

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Speaker 3: Like, like I said, when I got to the gas station,

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Speaker 3: I didn't have had that car for years, but I

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Speaker 3: had been driving my other car, so I forgot how

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Speaker 3: to put gas in it, cause a different ways.

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Speaker 2: So I couldn't even figure out how to put gas

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Speaker 2: in the car.

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Speaker 3: Like, I forgot how to put gas in the car.

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Speaker 3: So I'm at the gas station. I had to call

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Speaker 3: my boyfriend at the time, like, how do you put

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Speaker 3: gas in this car? I forgot like and he told me.

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Speaker 3: So it was just so many signs. I feel like

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Speaker 3: that was slowing me down, but I was still just

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Speaker 3: like no, I'm going.

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Speaker 1: So when you look back on that, now, how does

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Speaker 1: that make you feel? I mean, it's hindsight was twenty twenty,

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Speaker 1: but it's just like you probably think it's just a

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Speaker 1: regular day.

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Speaker 2: Exactly correct.

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Speaker 3: But you know, I'm real big on like the things

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Speaker 3: that I stayed may come and existed or you know,

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Speaker 3: I mean you know may happen or you know, signs

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Speaker 3: stuff that may slow me down maybe to save me.

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Speaker 2: I'm real big on that.

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Speaker 3: So I always go back to like, you know, like

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Speaker 3: I'm telling you now, like I see those signs that

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Speaker 3: was God like slow down, no, noing no, and I

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Speaker 3: still was going, you.

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Speaker 1: Know, right, So do you listen to those signs now?

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Speaker 3: Of course, of course I always have, And you know

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Speaker 3: I always been big on that, like you know, from

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Speaker 3: this didn't just happen because I lost my arm. I

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Speaker 3: always been a person that be like watch what you

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Speaker 3: say because the power target is a prower forul thing

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Speaker 3: or you know, rejection is God's protection.

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Speaker 2: I always been that way.

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Speaker 3: You're right, so I'm probably more higher on that, and

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Speaker 3: I realized that. But I always been that way, you know, right, So.

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Speaker 1: When y'all was leaving the club, how many was it

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Speaker 1: of y'all?

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Speaker 2: You, your cousin, and my another cousin was with us too, so.

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Speaker 1: It was just three of y'all.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 1: So when y'all was leaving the first bar the way home,

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Speaker 1: what happened? Like, did you notice anything or it was

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Speaker 1: just like a regular night.

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Speaker 3: It was just a regular night. We just had a

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Speaker 3: few drinks and we got ready to leave. We laughed

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Speaker 3: like we got in the car per usual.

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Speaker 2: We just left. We literally just left.

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Speaker 3: We got in the car and ten minutes it's a wreck.

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Speaker 3: I can't even recall what happened. That's the crazy part.

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Speaker 3: Like in some parts that I can't even recall, I

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Speaker 3: don't remember at all, such as like my Ammulans ride

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Speaker 3: who was the amulance, But I remember sort of talking

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Speaker 3: to them.

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Speaker 2: I can't remember none of that. But it just happened

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Speaker 2: like it was. It just happened. I have no It

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Speaker 2: was like freak accident, right, And did she hit something

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Speaker 2: she hit That's the point. It was no other cars,

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Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. So that was the crazy part.

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Speaker 3: But we went like over a curve and like through

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Speaker 3: a fence and didn't hit a tree.

222
00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:02,760
Speaker 2: Mmm. No other cars was involved, No other cars And

223
00:10:03,240 --> 00:10:05,320
Speaker 2: as to this date, we still don't understand what happened

224
00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:07,080
Speaker 2: to my arm, but it had to go through the window.

225
00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:12,959
Speaker 1: Mmm, sod Did you realize what was happening or.

226
00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:16,199
Speaker 3: I did when I got When I got out that car,

227
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:18,400
Speaker 3: I seen my bone. I don't even remember how my

228
00:10:18,480 --> 00:10:20,760
Speaker 3: hand looked, but I seen my bar was split from

229
00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:24,559
Speaker 3: the bottom where my my wrist was to my forearm.

230
00:10:24,679 --> 00:10:26,640
Speaker 3: I seen my whole bone, so I knew it. I

231
00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:28,800
Speaker 3: was like, my arm is gone. I knew it, and

232
00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:31,360
Speaker 3: then I sort of fell out after that. I remember

233
00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:32,160
Speaker 3: nothing after that.

234
00:10:32,679 --> 00:10:36,600
Speaker 1: Wow, And were you the only one that was injured?

235
00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:39,600
Speaker 2: So my other cousin she was actually injured too.

236
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:42,040
Speaker 3: She had to get like some fakes in her chest

237
00:10:43,320 --> 00:10:44,960
Speaker 3: or she had to do a surd drill with not

238
00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:45,679
Speaker 3: on her chest.

239
00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:47,160
Speaker 2: That was sitting.

240
00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:49,920
Speaker 1: Behind me and the driver. She was okay.

241
00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:55,160
Speaker 2: For the most part. Yeah. Why are you say, because

242
00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:56,880
Speaker 2: you know, it's just been a lot of you.

243
00:10:57,400 --> 00:11:01,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, so it isn't a lot of drama.

244
00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:03,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know it was.

245
00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:06,360
Speaker 3: It's not been so much drama, but it's just been

246
00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,680
Speaker 3: a lot of He says, she stayed between cause women talk.

247
00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:12,240
Speaker 3: That's what women do, and men also talk too, And

248
00:11:12,320 --> 00:11:15,040
Speaker 3: I feel like when it's just people talking, you know

249
00:11:15,240 --> 00:11:16,959
Speaker 3: that it may be said the wrong way or it

250
00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:20,160
Speaker 3: could be taken the wrong way. And so I just

251
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,480
Speaker 3: try to be more leery about what I say because

252
00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:24,400
Speaker 3: I don't want to feel like I'm offending her. However,

253
00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:26,240
Speaker 3: it's always all love, you know what I'm saying, Like

254
00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:28,160
Speaker 3: this wasn't nothing I was supposed to break us. You

255
00:11:28,160 --> 00:11:30,719
Speaker 3: didn't do this on purpose and all I started, You

256
00:11:30,760 --> 00:11:32,880
Speaker 3: know what I'm saying. If this was purposely, it'll be

257
00:11:32,920 --> 00:11:35,520
Speaker 3: a different story if use my French Robby at your dog,

258
00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:39,040
Speaker 3: like for real, right, But this wasn't purposely, so I

259
00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:43,720
Speaker 3: can't hold that against you. However, you gotta act okay too,

260
00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:44,720
Speaker 3: like what you're.

261
00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:51,400
Speaker 1: Bad for right right, right, right right, you know, be fair. Damn,

262
00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:55,400
Speaker 1: that's very unfortunate because you know, just hearing your story, like,

263
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,640
Speaker 1: I don't know y'all dynamic, but I would assume that

264
00:11:57,679 --> 00:12:02,000
Speaker 1: this wasn't intentional. It was a real just a freaked

265
00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:06,199
Speaker 1: out accident. So do you think that she's blaming you

266
00:12:06,320 --> 00:12:07,439
Speaker 1: or like or do she.

267
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:12,040
Speaker 2: Feel like I feel like she is that she's sort

268
00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:15,320
Speaker 2: of playing victim. You know what I'm saying, And it's

269
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,960
Speaker 2: not fair now true or not?

270
00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:19,720
Speaker 3: You know, And like I said, I'm big on on

271
00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:21,920
Speaker 3: me and knowing what I did wrong.

272
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:24,160
Speaker 2: If I feel or if I knew she was drinking

273
00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:26,079
Speaker 2: and driving, and I see that a lot of comments,

274
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:28,239
Speaker 2: or you know, I have like my cousin.

275
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:30,000
Speaker 3: And I'm aware of that if I knew she was

276
00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:32,440
Speaker 3: drinking and driving as an adult, because I have my

277
00:12:32,559 --> 00:12:35,120
Speaker 3: right to will to say nor Yet I shouldn't have

278
00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:37,200
Speaker 3: gotten in the car with a you know, a person

279
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,240
Speaker 3: who was drinking and driving.

280
00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:40,320
Speaker 2: You live and you learn you're right. I shouldn't have.

281
00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:42,880
Speaker 3: However, at the end of the day, I lost an

282
00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:44,520
Speaker 3: arm and this was not my fault.

283
00:12:44,559 --> 00:12:48,199
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. I didn't know no way, fashion, shape,

284
00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:51,040
Speaker 2: or form. I didn't do this to you.

285
00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:52,920
Speaker 3: Or I feel like, I just feel like it wouldn't

286
00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:55,680
Speaker 3: be the same if DeRos was reversed.

287
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:59,360
Speaker 2: That's how I just feel, right like I would be

288
00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:01,600
Speaker 2: the worst person in the world if I was if

289
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:02,720
Speaker 2: the shoe was on the other foot.

290
00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:05,360
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, right, do you regret not

291
00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:06,280
Speaker 1: driving a night.

292
00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:11,720
Speaker 3: In a way, I sort of do because I always do.

293
00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:17,120
Speaker 3: I'm telling you, I have always been the designated driver.

294
00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:21,880
Speaker 2: I have always been. It was just crazy that and

295
00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:22,320
Speaker 2: that's why.

296
00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:24,360
Speaker 3: That's why I also why I feel some type of way,

297
00:13:24,360 --> 00:13:26,360
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying. Plenty of times she has

298
00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:28,640
Speaker 3: been passengering my car. We have never even had a

299
00:13:28,679 --> 00:13:30,840
Speaker 3: fender bender, you know what I'm saying. We've been here

300
00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:33,280
Speaker 3: thirteen years, you know, and I feel like I got

301
00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:35,160
Speaker 3: in your car maybe four or five times, like that

302
00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:37,640
Speaker 3: might've been my fifth time being a passenger, and not

303
00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:39,800
Speaker 3: only was I hurt, but I lost the whole limb,

304
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:42,319
Speaker 3: you know. So I just feel like just a little

305
00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:43,560
Speaker 3: selfish when it comes to this.

306
00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:44,160
Speaker 2: True or no.

307
00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:46,200
Speaker 3: She may be facing what she facing it, she may

308
00:13:46,240 --> 00:13:48,160
Speaker 3: feel how she feels, she have a right too, but

309
00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:50,720
Speaker 3: I feel like it's just she just ain't you know.

310
00:13:51,240 --> 00:13:53,920
Speaker 1: Nine, What do you think happened? Because if y'all, if

311
00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:56,559
Speaker 1: there was no cars, I'm assuming that the weather was nice.

312
00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:01,280
Speaker 2: It was, and I believe it was dark though it

313
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:01,960
Speaker 2: was three am.

314
00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:06,640
Speaker 1: M yeah, it was about two three am, So maybe

315
00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:10,000
Speaker 1: she hit something and didn't realize it said.

316
00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:12,680
Speaker 3: She ride that route every day. Girl, every day she

317
00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:15,200
Speaker 3: ride that route. That's not no new route. It's near

318
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:16,880
Speaker 3: her home. Like it said, we was four or five

319
00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:19,560
Speaker 3: minutes from our own. So I just don't know what

320
00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:21,400
Speaker 3: could have played a part. And that's why I always

321
00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:24,000
Speaker 3: stayed freak because it was no animal, wasn't nothing in

322
00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:26,400
Speaker 3: the middle of the row. And that's why you know,

323
00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:28,720
Speaker 3: it just brung on other stuff because it was just like,

324
00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:31,160
Speaker 3: how did this happen to the point that one loss

325
00:14:31,160 --> 00:14:38,680
Speaker 3: of limbs?

326
00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:43,400
Speaker 1: So when did you find out that your arm needs

327
00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:44,800
Speaker 1: to be imputated.

328
00:14:44,760 --> 00:14:47,240
Speaker 2: That same night? And that's what I don't remember. I

329
00:14:47,280 --> 00:14:49,400
Speaker 2: do remember talking to the amlis. I even sort of

330
00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:53,200
Speaker 2: remember helping them get on the stretcher. But girl, I

331
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,960
Speaker 2: couldn't tell you if it was a black.

332
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:57,520
Speaker 3: Man or a white man, woman or man. I just

333
00:14:57,680 --> 00:14:59,600
Speaker 3: cannot tell you that part. That's how I know I

334
00:14:59,640 --> 00:15:02,440
Speaker 3: went out. I don't remember getting to the hospital, riding

335
00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:04,520
Speaker 3: in the back of the ambulance. That's when I woke up.

336
00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:06,720
Speaker 3: When I woke up, they were saying it was eight

337
00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:08,960
Speaker 3: doctors and nurses and they said, we rush you into

338
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,000
Speaker 3: the er. Your arm has to be amputated. But I

339
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,520
Speaker 3: already knew that. I knew that, so you know, I

340
00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:16,320
Speaker 3: wasn't expecting that. I just sort of went out after that.

341
00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:18,320
Speaker 3: But I knew that was happening because I seen my

342
00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:20,400
Speaker 3: arm before I even got to the hospital.

343
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,000
Speaker 1: And there was no there was nothing in you that

344
00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:24,040
Speaker 1: thought like, maybe I can my armor be okay, it's

345
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:25,640
Speaker 1: just a little fucked up because it was an accident.

346
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:29,320
Speaker 2: Girl. When I say, I mean, it's between you and I.

347
00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:31,240
Speaker 3: If you want to, I will send you graphics, you know,

348
00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:33,640
Speaker 3: over later on if you want to see it, just

349
00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:37,560
Speaker 3: to be like, wow, you sur that. But when I say,

350
00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:40,240
Speaker 3: I knew, it was from one end to the other,

351
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:43,120
Speaker 3: split all the way open, literally open.

352
00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:44,640
Speaker 2: I cannot tell you.

353
00:15:44,720 --> 00:15:46,560
Speaker 3: I was just thinking about it today because I had

354
00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:48,360
Speaker 3: seen the last picture I took.

355
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:49,320
Speaker 2: Right before I got my hair done.

356
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:51,320
Speaker 3: It was like a picture if you black, show your throat,

357
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:53,640
Speaker 3: And that was the last time I remember my hand.

358
00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:56,320
Speaker 2: I don't I didn't see my hand. I don't know

359
00:15:56,320 --> 00:15:57,240
Speaker 2: if it was on or not.

360
00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:04,080
Speaker 1: Wow, yep, that's fucking crazy, exactly.

361
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:05,600
Speaker 2: Damn.

362
00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:06,920
Speaker 1: Do you feel the way that you're the only one

363
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:07,640
Speaker 1: that got injured?

364
00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:10,720
Speaker 3: Well, I and my cousin did too. She did, and

365
00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:12,800
Speaker 3: she still got a large She got plates and stuff

366
00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:15,040
Speaker 3: in her chest. She just posted like today that you know,

367
00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:15,640
Speaker 3: like her.

368
00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:16,840
Speaker 2: She feels like her injury is.

369
00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:18,800
Speaker 3: Serious and some people don't take it serious, and she's

370
00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:21,240
Speaker 3: been feeling that way.

371
00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:22,520
Speaker 1: What do you mean by plates?

372
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:25,840
Speaker 3: Like like two metal plates she had to get. Basically,

373
00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:29,280
Speaker 3: what happened was when the car tried to throw her forward,

374
00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,400
Speaker 3: she had on the seat belt, so the seatbelt snapped

375
00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:33,760
Speaker 3: her throw her back and like snapped something in her chest,

376
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:35,640
Speaker 3: like her breastbone or something like that.

377
00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:38,480
Speaker 1: So she got like rods in her yeah.

378
00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:39,880
Speaker 2: Correct, right at her chest.

379
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:43,680
Speaker 3: They had to put some plates and some rods or

380
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:46,280
Speaker 3: something like that in her chest, you know, because of that.

381
00:16:46,360 --> 00:16:48,160
Speaker 2: So she was injured too, right.

382
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,840
Speaker 1: What did she say about all of this?

383
00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:54,840
Speaker 2: You know, we that's what I say, women talk. You know.

384
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:56,640
Speaker 2: It was one time once a podtized.

385
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:58,720
Speaker 3: She was at the hospital. She told me how she felt,

386
00:16:58,760 --> 00:17:01,880
Speaker 3: and everybody just felt like, you know, the person who

387
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:05,040
Speaker 3: was our cousin just wasn't fair. And then they got

388
00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:08,679
Speaker 3: back cool, and then you know, I'm not sure how

389
00:17:08,760 --> 00:17:11,240
Speaker 3: everybody just feel it. I just feel like everybody try

390
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:14,000
Speaker 3: to be neutral and you know, trying to get past this,

391
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:14,760
Speaker 3: but it's.

392
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:16,440
Speaker 2: Just too much talking going on right right.

393
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:18,919
Speaker 1: Right when they should only be within family.

394
00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:21,720
Speaker 2: Exactly, and it is with the family, that's the thing.

395
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:23,920
Speaker 2: But we got so many just women.

396
00:17:23,920 --> 00:17:28,800
Speaker 1: Like yeah, yeah, but I'm assuming maybe the other cousin

397
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:31,000
Speaker 1: who was driving is doing a lot of talking because

398
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,520
Speaker 1: she's facing charges, right.

399
00:17:33,200 --> 00:17:36,600
Speaker 3: Yeah she is, unfortunately, but not unfortunately not because that's

400
00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:37,840
Speaker 3: the consequences that come.

401
00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:39,680
Speaker 2: I look at it as like this, I had.

402
00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:42,160
Speaker 3: To face consequences for getting in the behind or getting

403
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:43,560
Speaker 3: in the car with a person who I knew how

404
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:44,119
Speaker 3: been drinking.

405
00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:46,520
Speaker 2: This is my consequence. I take it, it run, you know

406
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:49,240
Speaker 2: what I'm saying, And vice versa. You drink it, one

407
00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:51,600
Speaker 2: got hurt. That's how it go. You know.

408
00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:53,520
Speaker 3: I just feel like it's unfair when it was just

409
00:17:53,560 --> 00:17:55,640
Speaker 3: even coming to that, you know what I'm saying, because

410
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,560
Speaker 3: if the shoe was on the other foot, you would have.

411
00:17:57,520 --> 00:17:58,800
Speaker 2: To put your big girl penny. Though.

412
00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:01,280
Speaker 3: I also look at it as like this, even whatever

413
00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:04,479
Speaker 3: you face, even three to seven years from now, that

414
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:06,560
Speaker 3: is gonna be raised, you know what I'm saying, And

415
00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:08,120
Speaker 3: gone three to seven years.

416
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:09,840
Speaker 2: From now, I still won't have an arm. I still

417
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:11,760
Speaker 2: will not have an arm. I won't have an arm

418
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:12,680
Speaker 2: fifty years.

419
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:16,920
Speaker 1: To now, right right? That is crazy? And what urge

420
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:18,080
Speaker 1: is is she is she facing?

421
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:22,520
Speaker 2: So she's facing she got drinking and driving?

422
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:26,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then it's like like an.

423
00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:29,479
Speaker 2: Injury to person, basically like a serious injury. I got

424
00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:30,080
Speaker 2: an injury.

425
00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:31,800
Speaker 1: So is she facing time?

426
00:18:32,920 --> 00:18:35,199
Speaker 2: I'm not sure. It probably won't go.

427
00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:37,359
Speaker 3: Like I told you, we had a cousin who passed

428
00:18:37,359 --> 00:18:39,399
Speaker 3: away last year and her friend is the reason.

429
00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:40,399
Speaker 2: You know, they was drinking.

430
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:43,560
Speaker 3: A driver so we should have learned from has yet

431
00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:46,640
Speaker 3: to be prosecuted. So I believe it's probably gonna take

432
00:18:46,640 --> 00:18:48,680
Speaker 3: some time. I tell my cousin that now. I don't

433
00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:51,320
Speaker 3: wish that on her. I don't wish time when they call,

434
00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:53,240
Speaker 3: you know, if they were to call me. Actually, I

435
00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:56,119
Speaker 3: don't want pat for her. However, we are adults and

436
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,520
Speaker 3: we have to face consequences for the things.

437
00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:01,720
Speaker 1: That we do right right right damn. So the fact

438
00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:04,000
Speaker 1: that your cousin that passed away from drinking and driving

439
00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:06,120
Speaker 1: and she was with her homegirl.

440
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:07,639
Speaker 2: Yep, yep.

441
00:19:08,119 --> 00:19:10,520
Speaker 1: Then but do you feel like when shit like that happened,

442
00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:14,119
Speaker 1: like like, for instance, gun violence, Like I feel like

443
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:16,760
Speaker 1: gun violence is just so cammon within our community. So

444
00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:18,840
Speaker 1: it's just like when shit happens, unless it happens really

445
00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:20,960
Speaker 1: close to home, it just be like a damn, that's

446
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:24,199
Speaker 1: fucked up? So right, right, So do you feel like

447
00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:26,639
Speaker 1: that was a situation with your cousin? Like damn, Like

448
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:30,080
Speaker 1: you couldn't believe it, but like it's just so common

449
00:19:30,119 --> 00:19:30,880
Speaker 1: in a sense.

450
00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:33,640
Speaker 3: Exactly correct, And you know what I'm saying, And that's

451
00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:35,000
Speaker 3: why we should have learned from that.

452
00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:38,280
Speaker 2: How did we not learn from that? You know? Why

453
00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:40,800
Speaker 2: didn't we? And not even a year later.

454
00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:44,679
Speaker 3: You know, boom or two years you know, boom, we

455
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:47,760
Speaker 3: have another tragedy. Like losing a limb is just not regular.

456
00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:50,199
Speaker 3: You don't see that every day, let alone an armist.

457
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:51,919
Speaker 3: And when I look up people.

458
00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:53,919
Speaker 2: Without a limb, they are without legs.

459
00:19:53,960 --> 00:19:56,560
Speaker 3: And that's usually because of like diabetes and stuff like that.

460
00:19:56,600 --> 00:20:00,040
Speaker 3: And that's so much of car accidents and stuff like that.

461
00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:02,439
Speaker 1: You know, right, how many surgeries did you have to have?

462
00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:06,000
Speaker 2: I went under five times?

463
00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:11,040
Speaker 3: I believe mm five times thirty days?

464
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:11,439
Speaker 2: Wow?

465
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:13,919
Speaker 1: And why so many surgeries? It was just on the

466
00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:15,080
Speaker 1: arm or just overall.

467
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,760
Speaker 3: Oh, then they had to end up cutting some skin

468
00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:20,880
Speaker 3: off my leg to wrap my arm with it because

469
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:22,879
Speaker 3: you know, my skin had been gone, so they had

470
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:25,119
Speaker 3: to take her. I still got the you know, the

471
00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:27,639
Speaker 3: whole mark's like a big mark on my leg, a

472
00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:30,520
Speaker 3: big box that they took from skin them from my

473
00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:32,280
Speaker 3: arm and put I mean from my leg and put.

474
00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:32,760
Speaker 2: On my arm.

475
00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:34,880
Speaker 1: Mmm.

476
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:35,200
Speaker 2: Yep.

477
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:37,479
Speaker 3: So that was my last surgery and then I got

478
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,840
Speaker 3: I was able to leave the hospital the fourth of July.

479
00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:40,960
Speaker 2: I left the fourth of July.

480
00:20:42,359 --> 00:20:44,280
Speaker 1: I know, we talked. We talked about like you sell

481
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:46,560
Speaker 1: and bringing the one year anniversary, but I kind of

482
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:48,720
Speaker 1: feel like you're going to be like, I can't believe

483
00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:49,760
Speaker 1: this shit really happened.

484
00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:55,760
Speaker 3: Like every day, Yeah, every day. I was just looking

485
00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:58,159
Speaker 3: in the mirror today. I was like, like, this is

486
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:02,040
Speaker 3: my new life. Like you know, I I'm adjusting to it.

487
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:05,639
Speaker 3: I'm like, look at me, because I you know, I

488
00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:11,200
Speaker 3: was looking like a on y'all, looking at myself like, wow,

489
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:13,320
Speaker 3: this is my new life. I'm finna be a girl

490
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:14,760
Speaker 3: with one lesson.

491
00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:19,160
Speaker 1: And I am like, yeah, do you get angry with yourself?

492
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 2: You know?

493
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:22,840
Speaker 3: I was just I had someone had found me and

494
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:26,440
Speaker 3: was just talking to me about that, and I sort

495
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:29,200
Speaker 3: of sometimes I have rage, especially when it's like he says,

496
00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:32,959
Speaker 3: she say going on, not even so much with myself,

497
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,960
Speaker 3: but when my cousin I sort of felt like because

498
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,000
Speaker 3: it's just like, how could you be that way? Knowing

499
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:39,480
Speaker 3: you're not a victim in this? Not to say that

500
00:21:39,560 --> 00:21:41,680
Speaker 3: I am, but I am. You know, I don't want

501
00:21:41,680 --> 00:21:42,120
Speaker 3: to be, but.

502
00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:43,080
Speaker 1: I am right.

503
00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:46,040
Speaker 2: You know, I get sort of angry. I do.

504
00:21:46,119 --> 00:21:47,800
Speaker 3: I do, And I'm not for sure if this is

505
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:51,080
Speaker 3: supposed to be, if this that happen overnight, or if

506
00:21:51,119 --> 00:21:52,160
Speaker 3: it maybe forever.

507
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:54,160
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, I'm not sure how it's

508
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:54,520
Speaker 2: gonna be.

509
00:21:55,119 --> 00:21:57,040
Speaker 1: Well, when do do you ever feel like y'all will

510
00:21:57,119 --> 00:21:59,200
Speaker 1: ever just sit down and just talk, just you and her?

511
00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:02,480
Speaker 2: We just did. That was so ironic.

512
00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,240
Speaker 3: We had not talked since I think I talked to

513
00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:08,680
Speaker 3: her August or September, and then we just y'all.

514
00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:10,679
Speaker 1: Hadn't talked since August or September.

515
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:18,160
Speaker 3: Gret correct correct, correct, Yeah, we had not talked since

516
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:21,119
Speaker 3: August or September, and we just talked.

517
00:22:21,119 --> 00:22:23,520
Speaker 2: We literally just talked, and then it just like went

518
00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:24,080
Speaker 2: left again.

519
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:27,119
Speaker 1: But when y'all just talk, what was the conversation? I mean,

520
00:22:27,119 --> 00:22:29,080
Speaker 1: you'll have to go into details, but like, I'm assuming

521
00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 1: y'all got back on good terms a y'all talking about it.

522
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:33,800
Speaker 2: She told me how she felt. I told her how

523
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:35,840
Speaker 2: I felt. Yes, that's how it was.

524
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 3: That's and she was like, you know, we told each other.

525
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:42,080
Speaker 3: We was literally crying, boo crying. Are we sending messages

526
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:47,639
Speaker 3: through the we sending messages through the Instagram?

527
00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:49,560
Speaker 2: Talking? And we both boohoo crying.

528
00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:51,960
Speaker 1: Right, And so when y'all got through it the conversation,

529
00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:53,000
Speaker 1: you felt good about it?

530
00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:56,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, of course I did. I feel like

531
00:22:56,359 --> 00:22:57,280
Speaker 2: I told her how.

532
00:22:57,119 --> 00:22:59,520
Speaker 3: I felt, and you know, she told me how she felt,

533
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:02,200
Speaker 3: and then it just went left again, like we have

534
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:05,200
Speaker 3: been talking talking every day in fact, like cause she's

535
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:07,160
Speaker 3: a girl who call you every day and I answer,

536
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:10,800
Speaker 3: you know, and then like last week.

537
00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:14,520
Speaker 1: Wow, and what was that? I'm assuming that's you're right hand, right,

538
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:17,160
Speaker 1: your right arm? Was that your domination?

539
00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:20,960
Speaker 2: It was? Now I'm a left eat Wow.

540
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,560
Speaker 1: So what are some of the physical challenges that you

541
00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:27,119
Speaker 1: came that comes with you losing your dominant arm? I mean,

542
00:23:27,119 --> 00:23:29,520
Speaker 1: I feel like that's everything right, right.

543
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 3: So, and I like to cook, so I would say

544
00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:37,439
Speaker 3: cutting would be my main thing. But for Christmas My

545
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 3: family got me so much stuff that's good for amputee.

546
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 3: So I got like a cutting board that helped them

547
00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:44,600
Speaker 3: holds the stuff and cut for me. They got me

548
00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:47,359
Speaker 3: so many good gadgets, so they're very supportive, and I

549
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:48,359
Speaker 3: really really love that.

550
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:52,439
Speaker 2: You know, it ain't as bad as I thought it

551
00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:53,600
Speaker 2: would be. I can tell you.

552
00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:57,720
Speaker 1: That, right right, right right, that takes a.

553
00:23:57,640 --> 00:23:59,000
Speaker 2: Lot of patience. Mh.

554
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,840
Speaker 3: Like for instance, I you know, we usually I probably

555
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:05,760
Speaker 3: could buckle up my pants in one minute. It may

556
00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:08,160
Speaker 3: take me fifteen or twenty minutes to buckle up my pants.

557
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:09,280
Speaker 2: But I'm determined, you.

558
00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:14,440
Speaker 1: Know, right, And I know you have a child, right, Yes.

559
00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:15,600
Speaker 2: I have a son. He's eight.

560
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 1: So how has that been?

561
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:17,160
Speaker 2: Like? How?

562
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:19,520
Speaker 1: Because I'm pretty sure he asked questions and stuff.

563
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:22,320
Speaker 2: Of course, of course, like when it first happened, I

564
00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:24,119
Speaker 2: think it broke his heart. It broke its hard, he

565
00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:26,320
Speaker 2: broke down frying. But I think it was more.

566
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,359
Speaker 3: It was more because if it was gonna be it,

567
00:24:29,359 --> 00:24:32,199
Speaker 3: can Mobbie still be that same mommy? And then I

568
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:35,080
Speaker 3: think since he see that mommy is still that same mimmy,

569
00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,159
Speaker 3: still taking them you know where he wanted to go,

570
00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,159
Speaker 3: still doing what he want to do still, you know,

571
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:42,760
Speaker 3: being mommy, I feel like he's just more supportive now

572
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,000
Speaker 3: he's my little helper.

573
00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:48,560
Speaker 2: Yeah wow, yeah.

574
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:51,000
Speaker 1: So I'm pretty have you encountered any like misconceptions or

575
00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:53,399
Speaker 1: stereotypes about people who have disabilities?

576
00:24:56,840 --> 00:25:01,160
Speaker 3: Not so much, however, people has been there and staring,

577
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:05,320
Speaker 3: and yeah, like you.

578
00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:08,200
Speaker 1: Know, people stare though, because I mean, we are.

579
00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:10,879
Speaker 3: All adults, and honestly, like you know, my boyfriend at

580
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:12,840
Speaker 3: the side, he was like, well, people stare at you

581
00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:14,960
Speaker 3: before once you put your clothes on the stuff, so

582
00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:17,200
Speaker 3: how could you not expect them to on top.

583
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:17,520
Speaker 2: Of that now?

584
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:19,840
Speaker 3: And I was like, you're right, but it's like now

585
00:25:19,880 --> 00:25:22,040
Speaker 3: I feel like y'all stare because I haven't one left

586
00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:22,600
Speaker 3: step at all.

587
00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:26,120
Speaker 1: Or people could be staring because they probably haven't never

588
00:25:26,119 --> 00:25:28,119
Speaker 1: seen a woman that look like you, you know, like

589
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:30,880
Speaker 1: how we give it up with the bus down the beat?

590
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:35,240
Speaker 2: So girl, how did this happened to you?

591
00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:38,440
Speaker 1: So they probably are like, oh, shorty looking at fire,

592
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:40,760
Speaker 1: so they probably not used to seeing a woman looking

593
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:43,640
Speaker 1: like you and you have one arm, So.

594
00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:46,600
Speaker 2: That's what I said. So I'm glad you said that

595
00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:51,160
Speaker 2: because that's what I was thinking. You know, Yeah, they

596
00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:55,000
Speaker 2: stare so much. Girl, seriously, everywhere.

597
00:25:54,359 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 1: I've got Wow, So have you had to go under

598
00:25:57,359 --> 00:25:59,760
Speaker 1: did you have to do any therapy or like, how

599
00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:00,960
Speaker 1: have your recovery?

600
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:01,160
Speaker 2: Ben?

601
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:05,359
Speaker 3: I completed therapy and now it's time for me to

602
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,760
Speaker 3: receive an arm. So in the midst of getting an

603
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:12,640
Speaker 3: arm made, oh.

604
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:13,240
Speaker 2: Nice, I completed therapy because all you know when I went.

605
00:26:13,320 --> 00:26:15,440
Speaker 2: But the thing is, to this day, I still feel

606
00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:16,120
Speaker 2: my whole hand.

607
00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:18,359
Speaker 3: My hand sits here all day every day, and it

608
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:21,760
Speaker 3: literally itches like it's And that's the part that sometimes

609
00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:24,480
Speaker 3: get me a little angry too, because honestly, I'm seriously

610
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:26,520
Speaker 3: am in pain. I have not been on no medicine

611
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:28,600
Speaker 3: since I left the hospital. They never gave me no

612
00:26:28,720 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 3: medicine none. And I'm not even big on pills or anything.

613
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 3: But I finally get to go to the doctor next

614
00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 3: month to get something to help with this nerve paint

615
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:39,840
Speaker 3: because all day I feel my hand it's like shot.

616
00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:43,080
Speaker 2: It's itching. Girl, it hurts sometimes where I can't even sleep.

617
00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:47,560
Speaker 2: It's not even here. My itch is my forearm and everything.

618
00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:50,280
Speaker 1: And have you told them, yeah, they.

619
00:26:50,119 --> 00:26:52,479
Speaker 3: Know it's they called Yeah, they know they you know

620
00:26:52,560 --> 00:26:54,840
Speaker 3: they this that's what it's called. It's called phantom pain,

621
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,160
Speaker 3: and they said, honestly, you're probably never go away.

622
00:26:57,400 --> 00:26:57,520
Speaker 2: Now.

623
00:26:57,560 --> 00:26:59,440
Speaker 3: They was giving me some pills that's supposed to help

624
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:01,840
Speaker 3: it work, but it just wasn't working. So she was like,

625
00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:05,280
Speaker 3: I had to see a pain doctor because they couldn't prescribe.

626
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:05,959
Speaker 2: Anything else, you know.

627
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:08,800
Speaker 3: So I've been waiting almost February be my first time

628
00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:10,480
Speaker 3: since I got out of the hospital in July.

629
00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:16,680
Speaker 1: Wow, that's different because I imagine how that pain feels.

630
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:19,720
Speaker 2: Oh thumbing right now girl as we.

631
00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:23,639
Speaker 1: Speak, Oh wow, did you I'm just curious, did you

632
00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:24,440
Speaker 1: see your hand?

633
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:24,600
Speaker 2: Like?

634
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:25,960
Speaker 1: What do they do with your hand?

635
00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:28,520
Speaker 2: Like? I don't know.

636
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:30,600
Speaker 3: I didn't even ask, but I end up googling it

637
00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:32,840
Speaker 3: and it said that they usually just burn them because

638
00:27:32,840 --> 00:27:34,680
Speaker 3: I didn't see my hand when I asked her about

639
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:36,399
Speaker 3: my hand, she said, I asked her, I said, well,

640
00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:38,280
Speaker 3: was my hand on there?

641
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:39,160
Speaker 2: She said, barely?

642
00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:41,800
Speaker 3: But I never I don't recass seeing it. I recall

643
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,560
Speaker 3: seeing my arm. And then they the doctors had pictures

644
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,959
Speaker 3: on my arm and I don't even remember taking them.

645
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 2: That's how you know. I just was out of it.

646
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:51,000
Speaker 3: So and she was able to see me those and

647
00:27:51,040 --> 00:27:52,640
Speaker 3: that's how I was able to see how my arm

648
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:56,239
Speaker 3: really looked. And I was like, oh my gosh.

649
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:57,400
Speaker 1: But dude, do you ever think about how this could

650
00:27:57,400 --> 00:27:58,040
Speaker 1: have been a lot.

651
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 3: Worse exactly, I do, and for me to only have that,

652
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:04,680
Speaker 3: you know, I had scrapes and bruises, but literally that

653
00:28:04,840 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 3: was my only.

654
00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:10,680
Speaker 2: Injury. Yes, I literally you know, you.

655
00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:14,720
Speaker 1: Know, yeah, how has this affected your self confidence?

656
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:19,439
Speaker 2: You know? It's up and down? It is up and down.

657
00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:21,399
Speaker 3: And so that's why I try to be sure, Like

658
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:23,280
Speaker 3: that's why I took my wig off, because I'm trying

659
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:24,880
Speaker 3: to get my hair done at least try to keep

660
00:28:24,920 --> 00:28:27,400
Speaker 3: my hair done. And like I said, I have five nails, girl,

661
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:29,840
Speaker 3: I still go get these five nails.

662
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:30,119
Speaker 2: Right right right?

663
00:28:30,880 --> 00:28:34,960
Speaker 1: She got the long nail show. I know that's why.

664
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,040
Speaker 1: But you're gotta do things like this to keep the

665
00:28:37,119 --> 00:28:40,320
Speaker 1: spirit up, like you only got one. But it's like, shit,

666
00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:42,200
Speaker 1: it is what it is now, Like what can you

667
00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 1: do about it?

668
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:45,760
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying so exactly, I can't beat

669
00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:48,480
Speaker 3: myself up. You know, That's why I was saying, like today,

670
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:50,040
Speaker 3: I'm okay. Tomorrow I probably get.

671
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:52,200
Speaker 2: My hair done. It's gonna be a better day, you know, y.

672
00:28:53,360 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 1: And I also think that's like I said, that's the

673
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:57,240
Speaker 1: reason why people probably stare at you because when things

674
00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:59,880
Speaker 1: like this happen, you don't really see people show up

675
00:28:59,920 --> 00:29:03,080
Speaker 1: like this, like sometimes it overtakes them. So you gotta

676
00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 1: do what you gotta do. Girl, listen, I will still

677
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:12,240
Speaker 1: get them nails done, still keep down. And what about

678
00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:13,080
Speaker 1: your social life?

679
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:18,680
Speaker 3: I started feel like I've been in the house, but

680
00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:20,480
Speaker 3: I still get out.

681
00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:22,480
Speaker 2: I still make sure. I still try to take a

682
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:23,120
Speaker 2: trip or two.

683
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:25,640
Speaker 3: I still try to, but I just feel like I

684
00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:26,880
Speaker 3: still just been in the house more.

685
00:29:27,040 --> 00:29:30,040
Speaker 2: Honestly, I don't even mind. I just need a hobby.

686
00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:31,680
Speaker 2: I want to maybe get in school or something.

687
00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, you gotta do something to take your mind

688
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:39,600
Speaker 1: off of it until it's Yeah, have you been like

689
00:29:39,640 --> 00:29:41,800
Speaker 1: sharing your story and like telling people not to drink

690
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:42,200
Speaker 1: and drive?

691
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:46,160
Speaker 2: Of course, of course I'm getting I'm becoming.

692
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:48,800
Speaker 3: More and more big on that, and I just want

693
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 3: and I'm just seeing more people who's like me, are different,

694
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:54,840
Speaker 3: who may have lost an arm or lost a leg.

695
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:58,400
Speaker 3: I'm meeting more of them, you know, I'm getting more

696
00:29:58,480 --> 00:29:59,400
Speaker 3: stories from them.

697
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:01,680
Speaker 2: Like it was a girl who I had never even met.

698
00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:03,959
Speaker 3: I didn't know she was from Indiana, and she ended

699
00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:06,240
Speaker 3: up writing me, telling me her story where she ended

700
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:09,040
Speaker 3: up getting paralyzed waist down and from a drunk drive

701
00:30:09,160 --> 00:30:11,440
Speaker 3: accident and it was her friend. And so we've just

702
00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:13,640
Speaker 3: been talking, like you just, I've just been meeting a

703
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:15,880
Speaker 3: lot of different people who either can tell a story

704
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:19,320
Speaker 3: like mine, or you know, give me some advice about

705
00:30:19,320 --> 00:30:20,720
Speaker 3: a story like someone else's.

706
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:20,960
Speaker 2: You know.

707
00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:24,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, listen, when I used to be in college, y'all,

708
00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:28,280
Speaker 1: I mean unfortunately, I mean people drinking driving. I used

709
00:30:28,320 --> 00:30:30,320
Speaker 1: to drink and drive, and I just be thinking like damn,

710
00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:33,480
Speaker 1: like you mean, sometimes we take things for granted, like

711
00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:34,200
Speaker 1: for real.

712
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:35,320
Speaker 2: Right, bre.

713
00:30:37,080 --> 00:30:39,720
Speaker 1: And you do it so much like who don't go out,

714
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 1: have a couple of dreams and this and that and

715
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:45,440
Speaker 1: next thing, you know, something happens.

716
00:30:44,440 --> 00:30:47,520
Speaker 2: Exactly that you didn't. You just didn't expect at all.

717
00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's the same road she always traveled down.

718
00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:54,600
Speaker 2: Yep, yep, that's the crazy word.

719
00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 1: So how do you look at yourself now? Like, how

720
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:09,360
Speaker 1: do you feel about yourself because now you are a

721
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: different person? Or do you feel like you're saying.

722
00:31:13,720 --> 00:31:15,520
Speaker 3: I feel like it's like go hard or go home,

723
00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:17,960
Speaker 3: Like I just want to be a better person. I

724
00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:20,160
Speaker 3: want to do better things. I just want to be

725
00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:25,120
Speaker 3: just overall. Upgrade, upgrade, upgrade, upgrade, and also get closer

726
00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 3: to the Lord. For I am forever thankful. I always

727
00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 3: think the Lord. No, my son needed me more than anything,

728
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:33,240
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying. And for that, I am

729
00:31:33,280 --> 00:31:35,160
Speaker 3: so thankful that he left me here so I could

730
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:36,200
Speaker 3: raise my baby boy.

731
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:39,920
Speaker 2: He needs me. But yeah, I just want to upgrade,

732
00:31:39,960 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 2: go hard or go home? Right?

733
00:31:42,560 --> 00:31:45,440
Speaker 1: What did your family say about this, especially after just

734
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:47,360
Speaker 1: losing your other cousin.

735
00:31:48,040 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 3: Right, So, my mom she was very supportive. Of my aunt,

736
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:54,560
Speaker 3: which is my cousin's mom, she was very supportive. They

737
00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:56,600
Speaker 3: have all been very supportive, Like I said, they are.

738
00:31:56,720 --> 00:31:59,080
Speaker 3: For Christmas, got me so many nights items say help

739
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:01,080
Speaker 3: with empty because they oh, I like to cook, that's

740
00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:03,239
Speaker 3: a hobby of mines. So they all got me just

741
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:06,320
Speaker 3: these different type of items. They were all at the hospital,

742
00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:07,920
Speaker 3: even my mom had been.

743
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:08,680
Speaker 2: When they first happened.

744
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:10,680
Speaker 3: They couldn't even find me because they had me under

745
00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:13,480
Speaker 3: a different name because they wasn't for sure what happened.

746
00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:16,880
Speaker 3: They just knew my entry was so bad that they

747
00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:19,040
Speaker 3: had to try to hide my identity.

748
00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:20,920
Speaker 2: So my mom said, they was at the hospital for

749
00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:22,520
Speaker 2: about four hours. I know none of this.

750
00:32:22,680 --> 00:32:25,920
Speaker 3: I'm out looking for me, but they have. They all

751
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,640
Speaker 3: were supportive, bringing me up food, bringing me up lunch.

752
00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:32,760
Speaker 1: And now besides being supportive, ain't nobody curse you out?

753
00:32:33,200 --> 00:32:37,320
Speaker 3: Of course, of course my mom like everybody, because they

754
00:32:37,360 --> 00:32:39,160
Speaker 3: were even so mad at my cousin because they just

755
00:32:39,240 --> 00:32:41,000
Speaker 3: wasn't for sure what happened, and so.

756
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 2: They were like, you know what I'm saying, and they thought.

757
00:32:44,520 --> 00:32:46,560
Speaker 3: They wasn't for sure it was purposely if it was

758
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:47,320
Speaker 3: behind a guy.

759
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:48,880
Speaker 2: Everybody was just on sure.

760
00:32:48,960 --> 00:32:52,040
Speaker 3: So they really was mad at you know, how it happened,

761
00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:56,120
Speaker 3: why it happened, what happened, And I'm sure my mom

762
00:32:56,240 --> 00:32:57,160
Speaker 3: was scared as dark shit.

763
00:32:57,240 --> 00:32:59,800
Speaker 1: I'm sure she wasn't, you know, if I'm playing devils

764
00:32:59,800 --> 00:33:02,680
Speaker 1: at I can understand why your cousin probably felt a

765
00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:04,920
Speaker 1: way because the fact that she was driving, and even

766
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:07,720
Speaker 1: though I don't think it was intentional at all, she

767
00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:09,160
Speaker 1: could have lost two of her cousins.

768
00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:12,120
Speaker 2: Mm hmm. That's correct, And she say that, she said that.

769
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,840
Speaker 1: So that's probably something that she just having a hard

770
00:33:14,880 --> 00:33:20,120
Speaker 1: time with, like understanding or just grappling with, you know, right.

771
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:25,640
Speaker 2: Right, yep, yep, hmmm, that could have been a lot serious,

772
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 2: a lot worse.

773
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:31,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then also just seeing you like you are

774
00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:32,160
Speaker 1: a reminder of.

775
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:36,040
Speaker 2: She says that to it, and that's why she said,

776
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 2: And you know what, I'm like, I'm fine with that.

777
00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 2: You don't have to be a Robbie.

778
00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:41,160
Speaker 3: But she said that's why she sort of felt like

779
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:42,360
Speaker 3: she wanted to step back.

780
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:43,720
Speaker 1: Yes, it's probably hard for her.

781
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:47,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I respect it. I am okay, I respect that,

782
00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:48,360
Speaker 2: you know.

783
00:33:48,840 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, how has your perception of responsibility and accountability evolved

784
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,280
Speaker 1: since the accident? A lot?

785
00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:58,360
Speaker 2: That's what I was saying.

786
00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:01,320
Speaker 3: That's why I said I would take accountability for getting

787
00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:03,440
Speaker 3: in that car and knowing we have been drinking and driving.

788
00:34:03,760 --> 00:34:05,520
Speaker 3: I was a twenty year old, a twenty eight year

789
00:34:05,560 --> 00:34:09,600
Speaker 3: old adult with a son who have you know, experienced

790
00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:13,359
Speaker 3: traumatic things touch you know, so to keep doing that.

791
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:16,839
Speaker 3: I feel like I took accountability and I just want

792
00:34:16,840 --> 00:34:18,680
Speaker 3: to grow from them and learn from it and not

793
00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:19,720
Speaker 3: never do it again.

794
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:23,080
Speaker 1: You know, Right, has your perspective on life just changed

795
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:23,920
Speaker 1: since accident?

796
00:34:24,800 --> 00:34:27,040
Speaker 2: It has? It made me want to be a better me.

797
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:28,799
Speaker 2: I just want to be a better me.

798
00:34:29,480 --> 00:34:31,359
Speaker 3: It also made me look at a lot of other

799
00:34:31,440 --> 00:34:34,440
Speaker 3: things of how you know, some things could be like

800
00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:36,960
Speaker 3: you said, taken for granted. You got to be very

801
00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:39,520
Speaker 3: appreciative of just the little things, but along the big things.

802
00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:41,440
Speaker 3: Like I said, I pray about a lot of stuff,

803
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:43,680
Speaker 3: but I had never prayed to the Lord that I

804
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:44,680
Speaker 3: don't lose a limb.

805
00:34:44,719 --> 00:34:46,799
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, because that was something that

806
00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:49,719
Speaker 2: I took for granted. Yeah, you think you could get

807
00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:52,919
Speaker 2: for granted. I used to be talking about these fat

808
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:54,520
Speaker 2: arms I want to get. I'm like, oh, I want

809
00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:54,840
Speaker 2: to get on.

810
00:34:54,840 --> 00:34:57,080
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, I just stake back to just all

811
00:34:57,120 --> 00:35:00,120
Speaker 3: types of crazy, even just crazy stuff like that.

812
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:00,960
Speaker 2: I'm real big on that.

813
00:35:01,040 --> 00:35:03,440
Speaker 3: Like I have been saying, I wanted a break from

814
00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:05,360
Speaker 3: I'm like, I just want to break this summer. I

815
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:07,680
Speaker 3: wanted him to go with his dad and then boom,

816
00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:08,359
Speaker 3: I got a break.

817
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:10,319
Speaker 2: All right. I was thirty days in the hospital, Like

818
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:11,440
Speaker 2: I'm just real big.

819
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:17,399
Speaker 3: Stuff Like, oh damn, that was deep exactly exactly.

820
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:20,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, And now just by you saying like how you

821
00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:23,160
Speaker 1: did like your arms and stuff, and now that the

822
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:27,920
Speaker 1: one arm, like wow, and this arm.

823
00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:30,440
Speaker 3: Is so it's so scarred up. It's just so scarred up.

824
00:35:30,480 --> 00:35:32,319
Speaker 3: And you know, I have my baby face on this arm.

825
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:34,200
Speaker 3: I had his daddy on the on the other arm.

826
00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:36,360
Speaker 3: I am asked with his daddy in six years.

827
00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:44,879
Speaker 1: Without our right right, yo, Like, nigga, if you're gonna

828
00:35:44,920 --> 00:35:46,680
Speaker 1: take an arm, take the arm with this nigga on that,

829
00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:51,480
Speaker 1: like come on, lord, Like why you take the arm

830
00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:52,320
Speaker 1: of my baby on it?

831
00:35:52,480 --> 00:35:55,440
Speaker 2: Like come on now? Oh you want to scrap it

832
00:35:55,480 --> 00:36:03,280
Speaker 2: all up? Yo? Now that is jokes for real.

833
00:36:03,520 --> 00:36:04,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know you was tight.

834
00:36:06,040 --> 00:36:11,719
Speaker 3: I'm like, man, they say the best they could they

835
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:12,880
Speaker 3: did they Oh.

836
00:36:12,800 --> 00:36:15,359
Speaker 1: Man, won't you get get his face cover up?

837
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:18,239
Speaker 2: Exactly? I am I need to get it over here.

838
00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:20,359
Speaker 3: On top of that, I'm so glad, like this little

839
00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:23,080
Speaker 3: piece that I have is so I'm so glad that

840
00:36:23,160 --> 00:36:25,399
Speaker 3: I have it because you just don't know how much

841
00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:26,560
Speaker 3: it matters.

842
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:30,160
Speaker 1: Right yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Just to give a description

843
00:36:30,239 --> 00:36:34,000
Speaker 1: to the listeners, where does it? Where does it stop at?

844
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,200
Speaker 3: So they would call it like above the elbow, it

845
00:36:37,239 --> 00:36:41,000
Speaker 3: would be like above the elbow, emputee. So it's literally

846
00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:46,520
Speaker 3: above the elbow, I would say, right yeah, like yeah,

847
00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 3: not even some people have so much more than me,

848
00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:50,520
Speaker 3: Like who I see?

849
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:52,040
Speaker 2: Some people have want none at all?

850
00:36:52,160 --> 00:36:54,719
Speaker 3: So you know, you just I'm just even as I

851
00:36:54,719 --> 00:36:57,520
Speaker 3: dig deeper into this, I get more graceful, you know.

852
00:36:57,600 --> 00:37:00,359
Speaker 3: And I always say it could be worse or they

853
00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:02,759
Speaker 3: got lucky. It's just certain things, you know. I grow

854
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:03,120
Speaker 3: from it.

855
00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:05,880
Speaker 2: But yeah, yeah, I only got a little bit. Still.

856
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:09,319
Speaker 1: I feel like, yeah, have you been learning anything new

857
00:37:09,520 --> 00:37:11,480
Speaker 1: about since you are part of a new community.

858
00:37:12,600 --> 00:37:14,280
Speaker 2: Yes, I am so big.

859
00:37:14,360 --> 00:37:16,160
Speaker 3: I always been a type to look up stuff when

860
00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:17,280
Speaker 3: it comes to anything.

861
00:37:18,600 --> 00:37:21,280
Speaker 2: So the moment that this happened to me, the next day.

862
00:37:21,080 --> 00:37:25,000
Speaker 3: I was googling, you know, how to live with the

863
00:37:25,600 --> 00:37:28,200
Speaker 3: no or you know, just stuff and so from that

864
00:37:28,239 --> 00:37:29,959
Speaker 3: point I started doing the Facebook group.

865
00:37:30,000 --> 00:37:31,839
Speaker 2: So I started finding people on Instagram.

866
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:36,879
Speaker 1: That's good, unique community when things happen like this. Yeah, correct, Yeah,

867
00:37:37,400 --> 00:37:38,240
Speaker 1: and are you dating?

868
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:42,000
Speaker 3: I used to have a boyfriend, but it was just

869
00:37:42,160 --> 00:37:45,360
Speaker 3: rocky before And honestly, he was such a big support

870
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:47,080
Speaker 3: when I lost my arm and it was like so

871
00:37:47,239 --> 00:37:50,680
Speaker 3: rocky just right before that, but he was so supportive.

872
00:37:50,719 --> 00:37:53,319
Speaker 2: But it's just been rocky, you know. So I'm just

873
00:37:53,360 --> 00:37:54,160
Speaker 2: taking a step back.

874
00:37:54,239 --> 00:37:56,799
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm just in a mindset of isolation

875
00:37:56,960 --> 00:37:59,759
Speaker 3: where I'm just okay right now for trying to figure

876
00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:00,160
Speaker 3: out me.

877
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:04,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you know, maybe this situation, like if I'm

878
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:07,440
Speaker 1: thinking of any civil lioness, I feel like this situation

879
00:38:07,560 --> 00:38:10,600
Speaker 1: kind of like it's sitting you down in solitude for

880
00:38:10,640 --> 00:38:13,759
Speaker 1: you to like really see things with clarity and like

881
00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:15,319
Speaker 1: figure out what your next move is.

882
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:18,040
Speaker 2: Yes, correct, correct?

883
00:38:18,160 --> 00:38:19,880
Speaker 1: Like do you think anything else came out of this?

884
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:20,880
Speaker 1: That's positive?

885
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:28,000
Speaker 2: You know, I feel like I learned so much. I'm

886
00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:32,360
Speaker 2: learning so much. Yeah, I just I don't know.

887
00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:34,520
Speaker 3: I just feel like I'm looking at it's a different

888
00:38:34,520 --> 00:38:39,200
Speaker 3: outlook on everything now. Yeah, and especially like the people

889
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:41,560
Speaker 3: who do have less of a leg, like you go

890
00:38:41,640 --> 00:38:43,399
Speaker 3: back and forth, They're like, would you rather have less

891
00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:45,200
Speaker 3: of a leg or less of an arm? Like I

892
00:38:45,360 --> 00:38:47,880
Speaker 3: just always I just I'm just looking at all that

893
00:38:48,040 --> 00:38:51,880
Speaker 3: so different now, and you know, being forever grateful, But

894
00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:54,279
Speaker 3: sometimes I've been talking to the Lord, like, for real, Lord,

895
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:55,239
Speaker 3: you thought I was this.

896
00:38:55,560 --> 00:39:00,680
Speaker 1: Top like yeah, yeah, yeah, right, at least you get

897
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:02,280
Speaker 1: in a new arm when it is so when it's

898
00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:04,799
Speaker 1: going to be final, I just.

899
00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:08,680
Speaker 3: I'm not even sure. I just started going. They had started.

900
00:39:08,400 --> 00:39:10,200
Speaker 2: Way when I lost my arm, but my arm.

901
00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:13,400
Speaker 3: Was still literally open like flesh, so I had to

902
00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:17,279
Speaker 3: wear so I just got done with therapy, so they

903
00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:19,440
Speaker 3: just passed me and then I'll be going back, so

904
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:21,319
Speaker 3: I win't on them to schedule an appointment that could

905
00:39:21,360 --> 00:39:23,080
Speaker 3: take up to three months and.

906
00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:26,760
Speaker 2: Then but honestly, it's a long time exactly.

907
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:28,319
Speaker 3: And then it's still taken from a long time from

908
00:39:28,360 --> 00:39:32,560
Speaker 3: there to even get the process you going to. But

909
00:39:33,000 --> 00:39:38,080
Speaker 3: I don't even know if I were like, yeah, yeah.

910
00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:38,920
Speaker 1: And do you have to pay for it?

911
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:41,080
Speaker 2: Of course, of course I can surance of pay for some.

912
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:44,399
Speaker 3: But if you want like a real good one, because

913
00:39:44,440 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 3: most of them is just like ones that you use

914
00:39:46,080 --> 00:39:46,680
Speaker 3: around the house.

915
00:39:46,719 --> 00:39:48,239
Speaker 2: It's not so much that you can wear it out.

916
00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:48,960
Speaker 2: Like they got one.

917
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:50,560
Speaker 3: You can go out there and make it your same

918
00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:53,640
Speaker 3: skin complexion, but it don't move, so if I were

919
00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:54,960
Speaker 3: to wear it, it's like if I want to wear

920
00:39:54,960 --> 00:39:56,880
Speaker 3: a dress. I wanted to have a full arm instead

921
00:39:56,920 --> 00:39:59,560
Speaker 3: of just this, and I usually wear like a compression

922
00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:00,120
Speaker 3: over it.

923
00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:03,040
Speaker 2: But when I'm at home, I don't. But and then

924
00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:05,640
Speaker 2: they got another one that's like a robot that's basically

925
00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:07,839
Speaker 2: that's to help you around the house, like I mean,

926
00:40:07,880 --> 00:40:10,680
Speaker 2: like a pirate too little pirate hands. So they really not.

927
00:40:11,560 --> 00:40:13,280
Speaker 1: Oh much, I know what you're talking about.

928
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I feel like.

929
00:40:17,239 --> 00:40:19,200
Speaker 1: You're pretty I mean, I just met you, but I

930
00:40:19,239 --> 00:40:21,880
Speaker 1: feel like you're pretty comfortable. Are you comfortable, like do

931
00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 1: you want to have it or.

932
00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:30,799
Speaker 2: I don't know. I guess myself with it, but I'm

933
00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:31,560
Speaker 2: not sure.

934
00:40:31,600 --> 00:40:33,880
Speaker 1: Because are you able? I'm pretty sure you've been with

935
00:40:33,920 --> 00:40:35,400
Speaker 1: your left hand? Like can you write like how you

936
00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:36,680
Speaker 1: used to write with your right hand or is it

937
00:40:36,760 --> 00:40:37,759
Speaker 1: still like a new learning thing.

938
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:41,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's that's all. I'm like a baby. It takes

939
00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:44,239
Speaker 3: me a little longer. I'm sure I'm getting better. It

940
00:40:44,320 --> 00:40:46,800
Speaker 3: takes me a little longer. However, I could do everything

941
00:40:46,840 --> 00:40:49,359
Speaker 3: else pretty good around the house for my left hand,

942
00:40:49,400 --> 00:40:50,839
Speaker 3: but writing is one that I can.

943
00:40:51,440 --> 00:40:53,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, but like you said, you got to give yourself

944
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:56,040
Speaker 1: some grades because it hasn't even been a year. So

945
00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 1: the fact that you're backing this much progress is like

946
00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:00,399
Speaker 1: that's fire, right.

947
00:41:00,480 --> 00:41:03,120
Speaker 3: So I was, like I said, when I I'm ten

948
00:41:03,200 --> 00:41:05,279
Speaker 3: years from now, I know it'll be like you know.

949
00:41:06,880 --> 00:41:10,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, like I got a whole life and ahead of me.

950
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:11,759
Speaker 3: I asked the Lord to let me see one O

951
00:41:11,920 --> 00:41:13,799
Speaker 3: two and if it be one O two or one

952
00:41:13,880 --> 00:41:17,839
Speaker 3: lesson an I'm trying to be okay.

953
00:41:16,600 --> 00:41:17,200
Speaker 2: Right right.

954
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:20,200
Speaker 1: What is some advice you would give to someone who

955
00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:23,960
Speaker 1: has recently experienced a life altering injury like yours.

956
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:26,360
Speaker 2: That's a good one, you know.

957
00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:29,200
Speaker 3: I was just telling the young girl who wrote me,

958
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:31,239
Speaker 3: and she's like, she's so angry and she's just down.

959
00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:34,760
Speaker 3: I was like, you can't let it bring you down,

960
00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:37,840
Speaker 3: you know, angry, that's that's an emotion, and you're a

961
00:41:37,960 --> 00:41:41,919
Speaker 3: human that's expected from you, even like ups and down,

962
00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 3: ups and down, but don't let it bring you all

963
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:46,320
Speaker 3: the way down. You gotta be able to pick yourself

964
00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 3: back up. And I always been that type of person

965
00:41:48,719 --> 00:41:51,520
Speaker 3: from whatever has tore me down that day. I always

966
00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:53,920
Speaker 3: been the person to pick myself back up. True, and

967
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:56,319
Speaker 3: I always has support, but self always gotta have self

968
00:41:56,360 --> 00:41:58,880
Speaker 3: first before you can even feel like support is support.

969
00:41:58,960 --> 00:41:59,520
Speaker 1: That's the fact.

970
00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:04,040
Speaker 3: So you feel like you don't let nothing tear you down.

971
00:42:04,160 --> 00:42:06,479
Speaker 3: You got to stay above water.

972
00:42:06,560 --> 00:42:09,920
Speaker 1: You gotta and last but not least, what is your

973
00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:12,080
Speaker 1: message that you would like to convey to others about

974
00:42:12,080 --> 00:42:15,920
Speaker 1: the dangers of drunk driving based on your own experience.

975
00:42:16,560 --> 00:42:17,600
Speaker 2: Don't do it.

976
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:20,920
Speaker 3: You know every day it is just so on the

977
00:42:21,040 --> 00:42:24,359
Speaker 3: rise every day, especially here in Atlanta or Georgia. It's

978
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:27,040
Speaker 3: just getting worse and worse and worse. Whether it's somebody

979
00:42:27,080 --> 00:42:29,160
Speaker 3: that you don't know, you may have never met them.

980
00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:31,560
Speaker 3: People are hurt, getting hurt from.

981
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:34,200
Speaker 2: Drinking and driving uber or stay at home and drink.

982
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:37,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, listen, you need to get a partnership with uber

983
00:42:37,440 --> 00:42:42,920
Speaker 1: lyft No, Yeah, because it's important, Like we shouldn't be

984
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:43,840
Speaker 1: drinking and driving.

985
00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:47,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, we shouldn't, you know, we shouldn't. We shouldn't.

986
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:50,240
Speaker 1: And the fact the fact that y'all was four minutes

987
00:42:50,280 --> 00:42:51,480
Speaker 1: from the house.

988
00:42:51,920 --> 00:42:54,399
Speaker 3: Goes to show you how life can change. And then

989
00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:57,919
Speaker 3: blink of an eye, literally you blink in your my life.

990
00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:00,400
Speaker 2: I blinked in my life changed. I was the cue this.

991
00:43:00,360 --> 00:43:05,239
Speaker 1: Girl she was outside, y'all, she was outside her pictures

992
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:07,799
Speaker 1: like you know, so.

993
00:43:08,719 --> 00:43:10,520
Speaker 3: To show you that in the blink of an eye,

994
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:12,520
Speaker 3: life and b completely different.

995
00:43:13,040 --> 00:43:13,440
Speaker 2: Mmmm.

996
00:43:14,719 --> 00:43:17,000
Speaker 1: Well, I thought this was a really good conversation. I

997
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:19,120
Speaker 1: feel like it's important for us to share these stories

998
00:43:19,160 --> 00:43:21,520
Speaker 1: because I do think this is very common, and I

999
00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:25,320
Speaker 1: think that it's so common that people don't understand unless

1000
00:43:25,320 --> 00:43:27,600
Speaker 1: it happens to them.

1001
00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:28,280
Speaker 2: That's correct.

1002
00:43:28,480 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I appreciate you for coming on the show.

1003
00:43:31,760 --> 00:43:33,839
Speaker 1: I was sick last week y'all, and we had our

1004
00:43:33,840 --> 00:43:35,640
Speaker 1: first when we supposed to have our first conversation, and

1005
00:43:35,680 --> 00:43:38,000
Speaker 1: I was like, girl, I gotta recharge because I cannot

1006
00:43:38,000 --> 00:43:39,520
Speaker 1: get seen before my birthday.

1007
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:41,799
Speaker 2: That's what I said.

1008
00:43:41,840 --> 00:43:44,799
Speaker 3: I still my birthday was too My birthday was August second,

1009
00:43:44,800 --> 00:43:47,400
Speaker 3: and my accident happened June fourth, so literally too much.

1010
00:43:47,640 --> 00:43:49,720
Speaker 2: I still make sure I had a dinner. My family

1011
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:51,920
Speaker 2: came out. We were orange because orange is for like

1012
00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:53,160
Speaker 2: every tea, so.

1013
00:43:54,800 --> 00:43:57,239
Speaker 3: Everybody were orange. And I make sure I still look cute.

1014
00:43:57,239 --> 00:43:58,920
Speaker 3: You know, life goes down, you know.

1015
00:43:59,080 --> 00:44:01,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, listen, hell you're going to be sharing your story

1016
00:44:01,360 --> 00:44:03,840
Speaker 1: on some big stages, and I think what's so beautiful

1017
00:44:03,840 --> 00:44:06,200
Speaker 1: about your story is a lot of people can relate

1018
00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:08,600
Speaker 1: to you just based off how you present yourself. You know,

1019
00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:11,440
Speaker 1: so definitely share your story. And I would love to

1020
00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:13,520
Speaker 1: have you back to do a follow up, to see house,

1021
00:44:13,560 --> 00:44:16,759
Speaker 1: the one year anniversary, the five year anniversary, and just

1022
00:44:16,760 --> 00:44:18,399
Speaker 1: to see the amazing things that you're doing.

1023
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:21,480
Speaker 2: Of course, thank you so much for having me. I

1024
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:23,000
Speaker 2: truly truly enjoyed it.

1025
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:25,920
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, And to the listeners, if you have any questions, comments,

1026
00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:28,160
Speaker 1: or concerns, please make sure to email me a hello

1027
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 1: at the phdpodcast dot com. Always remember to share your

1028
00:44:32,040 --> 00:44:34,360
Speaker 1: story because you never know how your storyline could be

1029
00:44:34,360 --> 00:44:40,359
Speaker 1: someone else's lifeline until next Okay, Amen, now until next time.

1030
00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:45,920
Speaker 1: Everyone Later, You're not gonna say bye, yd.

1031
00:44:45,800 --> 00:44:47,520
Speaker 2: Pleased bye, see y'all.

1032
00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:58,959
Speaker 1: The Professional Homegirl Podcast is a production of The Black

1033
00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:02,879
Speaker 1: Effect Podcast. Now work for more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit

1034
00:45:02,920 --> 00:45:05,919
Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app, app a podcasts, or wherever you listen

1035
00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:08,879
Speaker 1: to your favorite shows. Don't forget to subscribe and rate

1036
00:45:08,960 --> 00:45:11,480
Speaker 1: the show, and you can connect with me on social

1037
00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:13,360
Speaker 1: media at the PHG podcast