Speaker 1: We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This
Speaker 1: is How Men Think and I heard radio podcast. Hi.
Speaker 1: This is Paris Hilton, and I'm excited to tell you
Speaker 1: that I'm executive producing the new and improved How Men
Speaker 1: Think podcast. How Men Think was always about helping women
Speaker 1: understand the things that men say and do, all of
Speaker 1: it relationships, dating, marriage, divorce, breakups, hookups, love, sex, family,
Speaker 1: and fatherhood. But when I agreed to do this reboot,
Speaker 1: I had a few conditions. No sugarcoating, no mind games,
Speaker 1: and absolutely no man splaining. Men are hard enough to
Speaker 1: understand without the mind games. To be honest, I'm not
Speaker 1: even convinced that they understand themselves, but the How Men
Speaker 1: Think podcast is exactly what we need to figure them out.
Speaker 1: It's going to be fun, informative, and probably a bit
Speaker 1: scary at times because we're literally going inside the minds
Speaker 1: of men. Buckle up, check out the How Men Think
Speaker 1: Podcast on I Heart Radio and everywhere you listen to podcasts.
Speaker 1: Hey what's up, y'all? I'm Jimmy Allen. Some of you
Speaker 1: might know me as a singer songwriter, uh or someone
Speaker 1: you're tired of hearing on the radio. Either way, I'm me.
Speaker 1: I'm here and I'm happy to be guest hosting How
Speaker 1: men think? So we're gonna answer all your questions and
Speaker 1: solve some of your fascinating questions that you've probably been
Speaker 1: sitting on for a while and kind of wanted to yourself.
Speaker 1: What do you men think? How do you men think?
Speaker 1: But I'll tell you what before we jump into all that,
Speaker 1: we're gonna jump into eleven questions kind of about myself
Speaker 1: as shucks. So before we jump into that, We're gonna
Speaker 1: go into eleven questions, and I'll tell a little bit
Speaker 1: about me that way, hopefully you feel a lot more comfortable.
Speaker 1: We can get on here and have good time and
Speaker 1: I can answer some of your questions. Okay, So here
Speaker 1: we go. This is eleven Questions with Jimmy Allen. What
Speaker 1: are you known for? Tell us about yourself? Well, I
Speaker 1: I probably known for, you know, being a country music
Speaker 1: artist recently. Probably it's a lot of people know me
Speaker 1: from Dance with the Star of Season thirty, which is
Speaker 1: being great by the way. That's me. You know. I
Speaker 1: grew up in this town called Milton, Delaware with my father,
Speaker 1: my mother, my siblings, grow listen to country music, rock music.
Speaker 1: You know, Christie music, R and B, hip hop everything. Um,
Speaker 1: this small town guy. You know, I love fishing. I
Speaker 1: love hanging out at the Mooselage, you know, drinking beers
Speaker 1: and playing cards with my family. Who are you in
Speaker 1: your personal life? Yeah? In my personal life, I'm sure
Speaker 1: my wife would say I am the kind of opposite
Speaker 1: of who I am on stage on television. Um, I
Speaker 1: don't know. I'm a lot more chill at home, you know,
Speaker 1: probably because I spend so much energy at work. I'm
Speaker 1: a lot I'm sure my wife would like me be
Speaker 1: a lot more energetic at home because I give it
Speaker 1: to the world, gives to everybody else. But times at home,
Speaker 1: I just love watching TV. Uh. You know. I love
Speaker 1: being with my wife and you know, saying stuff and
Speaker 1: laughing with her and crying with her doing we're TV
Speaker 1: shows because we watched a lot of TV out of movies. Um.
Speaker 1: But yeah, that's kind of me in my personal life.
Speaker 1: I love Disney World. I'm pretty simple for the most part.
Speaker 1: Tell us three shows you're binge watching right now? Three
Speaker 1: shows I'm binge watching? Uh, Succession, Um, that's my bench watched. Oh,
Speaker 1: Lock and Key just came out. Oh and you. We
Speaker 1: were on you, we just finished you. What is your
Speaker 1: favorite food? I would probably say French toasts. I love
Speaker 1: breakfast food altogether. Mac and cheese, my grandma's recipe and
Speaker 1: mac and cheese, Kenny, I love soul food. I don't know,
Speaker 1: it's not that great for you. You You shouldn't eat it
Speaker 1: as much as I do, but it's so good. Tell
Speaker 1: us about your career my career. Um, while I'm touring
Speaker 1: country artists right now. Um, some people consider me country,
Speaker 1: some people just consider me an artist. Either way. I
Speaker 1: get to travel and sing songs I wrote with my friends. Um,
Speaker 1: so that's for me the best part. Um, don't get
Speaker 1: into a lot of television now, whether it's hosting or
Speaker 1: being a contestant on the show like Dance with the Stars,
Speaker 1: doing that, and you know, just working on a bunch
Speaker 1: of things I've always wanted to do, all right, And
Speaker 1: you know with my career, I am a officially children's
Speaker 1: book Arthur. Right now, I have a book I'll call
Speaker 1: my Voice as a Trumpet. Um. Two of my biggest
Speaker 1: highlights in my career, I would say it's one I
Speaker 1: got to perform with Charlie Pride on the CMA Awards.
Speaker 1: Charlie Pride is the first black country artist. I sold
Speaker 1: over sixty million records in the sixties and seventies. Um
Speaker 1: and working with another musical giant, Elton John. I got
Speaker 1: to do a song with Elton on his new album
Speaker 1: called The Lockdown Sessions. We did a song that I
Speaker 1: co wrote with some people called Beauty the Bones, and
Speaker 1: I still can't believe those two things happen in career.
Speaker 1: What's your biggest fear in life? Probably not living up
Speaker 1: to the expectations I set for myself, whether that be
Speaker 1: you know who I am as a father, a parent,
Speaker 1: a musician, And that's probably my biggest fear. Like setting
Speaker 1: bars for myself and not reaching them. You know, um,
Speaker 1: letting people down, that's my biggest fear, whether it's my
Speaker 1: wife or my kids, that's my That's my biggest fear.
Speaker 1: What's your biggest pet peeve? Lazy people on my biggest
Speaker 1: pet peeves. There's nothing I hate worse than a lazy person.
Speaker 1: And I ask whole. I ask whole is someone who
Speaker 1: asked you questions, You give answers and they do the
Speaker 1: exact opposite of what you told them to do. You
Speaker 1: know anyone that makes excuses. I just feel like, yeah,
Speaker 1: things are hard in life. There's always gonna be obstacles.
Speaker 1: I don't mean you can't get through them, can't get
Speaker 1: around them. Um, So yeah, those are probably my biggest
Speaker 1: pet peeves. What makes you the most happy? I honestly
Speaker 1: hanging out with my family a Disney World. I'm sure
Speaker 1: my family is sick a going, but I don't know
Speaker 1: what it is about that place and being in with
Speaker 1: my family that really makes me happy. What is your
Speaker 1: ideal Saturday morning? Ideal Saturday morning falling into the city
Speaker 1: on a new city on tour, you know, having my
Speaker 1: family with me, eat bread, let's hang out, you know,
Speaker 1: doing a couple of beers with my band, playing some
Speaker 1: corn hole. That's that's great for me. Are you more
Speaker 1: of the athlete or the armchair quarterback? I think I'm
Speaker 1: more an athlete for sure. Definitely more of the athlete.
Speaker 1: I'd rather be out there doing it than sit and
Speaker 1: watch somebody else do it. Last and not least. What
Speaker 1: keeps you motivated? I'll say my family keeps are motivated,
Speaker 1: you know, for for providing for them and in my career.
Speaker 1: For me. Honestly, everything clicked once I have my son.
Speaker 1: You know, I realized that my dream didn't change, but
Speaker 1: my purpose and my reason behind when I was doing changes,
Speaker 1: because I feel like you see a lot more success.
Speaker 1: You have a purpose, you know, for what you're doing,
Speaker 1: and there's a reason behind what you're doing. That was
Speaker 1: the Eleven Questions with Jimmy Allen. So, y'all, I just
Speaker 1: answered some questions about myself. Now I'm actually here to
Speaker 1: answer questions from you. So let's jump into that right now. Hi, Hey,
Speaker 1: how you doing. I'm good. My name is a Lissa.
Speaker 1: How are you hello? Listen, my name is Jimmy. Hello. Okay,
Speaker 1: So my question is why do men always say they're
Speaker 1: simple creatures but we can never figure them out? Well,
Speaker 1: honestly we are. The thing is, see, man, if you
Speaker 1: ask us a question, whatever we say, that's what we mean.
Speaker 1: And what I've learned is women like to look for
Speaker 1: meanings within our answer. There's no more meanings. That's it.
Speaker 1: So if you ask us, sir, for instance, you know,
Speaker 1: one of the most famous ones is if a woman
Speaker 1: says does this dress make me look back right? And
Speaker 1: say the guy says, yes, it does. What we're saying
Speaker 1: is we're not saying you're back. We're saying that dress
Speaker 1: makes you look that way. And then you know I've
Speaker 1: said that someone before. So every dress that where it
Speaker 1: makes me look at No, I didn't say that. I
Speaker 1: said that. You said does this dress make me look back?
Speaker 1: And we said, yes, that dressed us guys need three things.
Speaker 1: We want to watch our sports and not we ask
Speaker 1: any questions during our sports. That's it. We want. We
Speaker 1: love to eat, We love time, y'all, and just enjoying
Speaker 1: it without it meaning anything. If a guy asks you, hey,
Speaker 1: let's hang out, it's not because we're in trouble trying
Speaker 1: to get out of trouble. No, we just want to
Speaker 1: hang out. One thing that men don't like the most
Speaker 1: is just the thing my wife does it. Hey, babe,
Speaker 1: we do want to eat tonight? Um, and I'll say something.
Speaker 1: I'll say, well, what do you want to Oh, it
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. Then I mention something I don't want to
Speaker 1: eat that. What do you just said? It doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: So the thing you, guys, the more straight to the
Speaker 1: point you are, we understand that when questions and things
Speaker 1: start getting drawn out, that's when we're just guys. Would
Speaker 1: rather just tell us what you want we'll do it.
Speaker 1: M take. Thank you. You're hopping on here. What's up?
Speaker 1: How are you good? How are you? I'm doing well.
Speaker 1: Nice to meet you. Nice to meet too, too. I
Speaker 1: appreciate you hopping on here. Of course I'm excited to
Speaker 1: ask you my question. Nice, she got so I need
Speaker 1: to hear a man's perspective about texting in my dating life.
Speaker 1: I have never understood why men text so short and
Speaker 1: simple that they don't include emojis like obviously us females do.
Speaker 1: I just can't get a read on it. Is there
Speaker 1: any way to figure out a guy has interested you
Speaker 1: and you by the way he texts, Not really by
Speaker 1: the way he texts, but if he texts you first.
Speaker 1: Put it this way. If you text the guy and
Speaker 1: he responds, it's one thing. But if you don't text
Speaker 1: a guy for a day or two and he don't
Speaker 1: text you back, he ain't interested. That's a good point.
Speaker 1: That's good to know. Okay, guys, if we want something,
Speaker 1: we go get it. And a lot of times I
Speaker 1: know you might try to make excuses for him or
Speaker 1: for yourself, saying well maybe he's busy, he ain't that busy.
Speaker 1: It takes two seconds to send a text and if
Speaker 1: he's not even thinking about you, honestly, to send a
Speaker 1: text because he ain't thinking about you. He because I guarantee, see,
Speaker 1: guys were different. A lot of times girls will give
Speaker 1: out their number and not even want to talk to
Speaker 1: a guy. They just do it to be nice. Guys,
Speaker 1: we don't ask for girls numbers really if we're not
Speaker 1: really interested. And if we text you, we're interested. So
Speaker 1: if you're texting him more than he's texting you not
Speaker 1: It's not about the length of the text message because
Speaker 1: a lot of times we're straight to the point. If
Speaker 1: you're texting him and you hear from him that night
Speaker 1: or the next day, he ain't interested. Move on over.
Speaker 1: I love that. That's a good quarter. I'm gonna keep
Speaker 1: that in mind. Yeah, thank you so well'll careff. There's
Speaker 1: no emoji or anything anymore emojis. Thank you, You're so welcome.
Speaker 1: You have a good night, all right? By under pressure? Um,
Speaker 1: the pressure on the stretch. M Hi, Hey, what's going on?
Speaker 1: Are you good? How are you doing good? UM? I
Speaker 1: have a question for you. Right okay, So my boyfriend
Speaker 1: lives in Miami. I live in California. UM, I know
Speaker 1: you're on the road. So how do you keep it, like,
Speaker 1: how do you keep your connection or your relationship close
Speaker 1: with all that distance. Well, I tell you this, most
Speaker 1: guys were bad at communication, honest, Like my wife would
Speaker 1: tell you, I am not the best with communication. But
Speaker 1: I love my wife, you know what I mean, She's
Speaker 1: the one I chose to marry, so what I want
Speaker 1: to be with. But we're not always good at showing
Speaker 1: a lot of times we're better in person. Um, I
Speaker 1: would just say, be honest. You know, first of all,
Speaker 1: I ask him, hey, do you see this going anywhere?
Speaker 1: Long term? Straight to the point. With guys, is better
Speaker 1: to ask straight to the point. Don't try to figure
Speaker 1: out what he's thinking. Just ask him. Right. If you
Speaker 1: ask a guy that right and he gives you a
Speaker 1: long drawn out answer longer than three sentence, three sentences
Speaker 1: typically is full of crap. Because we're very honest, you see,
Speaker 1: it's gonna wear Yeah, I do boom, that's enough. Um,
Speaker 1: but I don't know. I would say, just talk to
Speaker 1: him and tell him what you need, right. And I
Speaker 1: feel like, here's the things about relationships. It's about finding
Speaker 1: someone who can give you what you need, and also
Speaker 1: you give them what they need, and then find someone
Speaker 1: who gives you what you want and also make sure
Speaker 1: you can give him what he wants. And I say
Speaker 1: you have that conversation right now. Just be honest, because
Speaker 1: the last thing you want to do is waste your time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: always his time. You know, you could try to make
Speaker 1: something work that ain't gonna work, and all that's doing
Speaker 1: is you're wasting time, stopping you from meeting the person
Speaker 1: you're supposed to be with, and you're stopping him from
Speaker 1: waste you know, meeting the person that he's supposed to
Speaker 1: be with. And just know, there's a lot of great
Speaker 1: people out there, right, but not every great person belongs together.
Speaker 1: You know, life and relationships are about you living your
Speaker 1: life and they live in there. And along the way
Speaker 1: you find someone who's still heading your same trajectory, but
Speaker 1: your lives and who you are don't don't have to change.
Speaker 1: And you know the thing about relationships is has to equal,
Speaker 1: not saying each person has to give a uncent, but
Speaker 1: as equal, because it might be sometimes where you're gonna
Speaker 1: give and you have to make sure he's willing to
Speaker 1: give that other eight invit. So yeah, I say, you
Speaker 1: have that conversation with him and be honest and if
Speaker 1: it don't work out, no hard feelings, it just don't
Speaker 1: work out. That means that's not the person for you.
Speaker 1: Because I don't really get wrapped up and soul made stuff.
Speaker 1: I don't really believe in that. I believe in you
Speaker 1: finding the person who you're willing to deal with their
Speaker 1: baggage and their bad part because everybody can do well
Speaker 1: with the good parts of the person. But are you
Speaker 1: willing to deal with the person's bad habits, deal with
Speaker 1: their baggage. That's that's when you fain. Okay, I can
Speaker 1: deal with that. That's how you know you're on the
Speaker 1: right path to find a person you're supposed to be with.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you for too into love doctor, get that? Okay? Hi,
Speaker 1: what's up? Hi? My name is Zoe. How are you, Zoe?
Speaker 1: How are you doing what you're calling from? I'm good.
Speaker 1: I'm calling from Orange County, California. Orange County, Yeah, I know,
Speaker 1: we're pretty Orange County. Yeah, I'm in l A right now. Awesome. Well,
Speaker 1: it's nice to see you. And so my question is,
Speaker 1: I'm not currently in a relationship, but there's a guy
Speaker 1: at work who expresses his interest I e buys me food,
Speaker 1: talk successively to me, fixes things for me for free.
Speaker 1: But the other day I offered him my number as
Speaker 1: opposed to talking at work to avoid getting in trouble,
Speaker 1: and he didn't respond to it. He just kind of
Speaker 1: avoided it and continued today to just his sweet behavior
Speaker 1: and like didn't really like and like didn't really like.
Speaker 1: I think he ignored the question. But I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm confused, Like, do you guys like forwardness? So they're
Speaker 1: not I'm so confused. So here's the thing about guys.
Speaker 1: Sometimes they like forwardness. But from what you said, I
Speaker 1: have two takes on that. Okay, One he likes the
Speaker 1: floor at work because he's probably in a relationship already somewhere.
Speaker 1: Or he might not be interested in girls. He probably
Speaker 1: you know, might like guys and just wants a friend.
Speaker 1: That's what I was thinking, Oh my god, because I'm like,
Speaker 1: if he if he's flirting with you and you offer
Speaker 1: the number and he don't take it, you have relationship
Speaker 1: or just don't like girls, or maybe he does like girls,
Speaker 1: but he might want to just keep it as a friend.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I feel like those are the only
Speaker 1: three answers that you should if do you like him?
Speaker 1: Do you find him attractives? Yes? I do. But my
Speaker 1: other answer in my head was he's gay, because I
Speaker 1: feel like guys who are attractive and nicer they're taking
Speaker 1: are gay, and that's he's not. My thing is winning doubt.
Speaker 1: Just asked the question, say, hey, I'm interested. There's nothing
Speaker 1: wrong with being honest, you know, not wrong being forward.
Speaker 1: Hey I'm interested in you. Would you like to hang out?
Speaker 1: Are you interested in me? Yeah? But he said he's single.
Speaker 1: He's like, oh, I'm single. That's why I buy people's
Speaker 1: stuff and that's why I'm like, what, Yeah, Then maybe
Speaker 1: he just enjoys being single and enjoys the game. There's
Speaker 1: some people that just enjoy the game, you know, they don't.
Speaker 1: They just enjoyed the hurting, the you know, the interaction
Speaker 1: at work, and that's kind of where they wanted. So
Speaker 1: you should ask him, went in dout. That's my that's
Speaker 1: my answer for everyone. Just asked the question. Try to
Speaker 1: get an honest answer out of him. That way, you know,
Speaker 1: you can just figure out from the air and I'll
Speaker 1: move on. Oh you're so awesome, Thank you so much
Speaker 1: to me. I appreciate it. I appreciate you calling in
Speaker 1: a great in whatever this thing is? Yes, God black right,
Speaker 1: maybe you're my advice. My wife's another and she probably
Speaker 1: they're like, why why I ask your him? Hey Gabby,
Speaker 1: how are you doing great? How are you good? What
Speaker 1: you think and what's on your brain? Um? Well, my question,
Speaker 1: I guess would be um, boyfriend and I are in
Speaker 1: just this new relationship and um our schedules are very opposing.
Speaker 1: So I guess my question is how can we make
Speaker 1: sure to make time for each other? Because sometimes it
Speaker 1: feels like you try and plan everything. Maybe it's not
Speaker 1: as romantic. I guess I would say, see the thing
Speaker 1: about there's a difference between romance and what you see
Speaker 1: on television, right, you know what I mean? So I
Speaker 1: would say, find out what's important to you, right, and
Speaker 1: whether it's time, whether it's words of affection, whether it's
Speaker 1: physical touch whatever, and see he didn't give that to you.
Speaker 1: And also if he's busy and stuff, you have to
Speaker 1: take in mind, what are you willing to sacrifice until
Speaker 1: he's able to give you what you want? And I
Speaker 1: feel like that's the biggest thing I'm all about. You know,
Speaker 1: have the conversation you might not always agree, you know,
Speaker 1: but if you feel like that's the person you want
Speaker 1: to be with and he tells you and shows you
Speaker 1: he wants to be with you, um, you know, you
Speaker 1: try to make it work again. Like I you know,
Speaker 1: I told someone before, relationships are about sometimes he can
Speaker 1: only give twenty and you gotta give eight. Right now.
Speaker 1: With my wife and my schedule she's given, I can
Speaker 1: only give ten. You know. I'm sure it's frustrating for her,
Speaker 1: but you know she's been great. You know, she's been
Speaker 1: my rock, holding me down and um to where I'm
Speaker 1: all over the place traveling, you know, she's been there.
Speaker 1: I'm sure it's frustrating, but she's still there. And when
Speaker 1: someone loves you, even though it hurts and it sucks
Speaker 1: sometimes not seeing them all the time, they're willing to
Speaker 1: put that work in. So I don't know, it's just
Speaker 1: a conversation you gotta have with them and be honest,
Speaker 1: you know, be straight to the point. Tell them what
Speaker 1: you want, tell them what you need, ask them can
Speaker 1: you fulfill this? And if you can't, what's stopping you?
Speaker 1: And how long will what stopping you continue to stop you?
Speaker 1: And then see if you're willing to do with that. Yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that's that's great advice. That's why I'm here.
Speaker 1: Open conversation. Definitely a way that's an open conversation. And honestly,
Speaker 1: I feel like the worst thing people do in relationships
Speaker 1: is not say what they're feeling. They're afraid of offending
Speaker 1: or hurting somebody else's feelings. It ain't about that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's about you being honest because the last thing you
Speaker 1: want to do is not say what you're feeling. Then
Speaker 1: two weeks, two years down the road, during this relationship
Speaker 1: with you're frustrating not getting everything you want, and the
Speaker 1: person you're with could have been willing to sacrifice and
Speaker 1: make it work. But guys, the thing about guys is
Speaker 1: if you don't know, we don't tell us. If you
Speaker 1: don't tell us, we don't know. We are not mind readers.
Speaker 1: We don't try to be mind readers. We are very
Speaker 1: simple creatures and women are the most complex individuals in
Speaker 1: the world. So the best you can simplify it for him,
Speaker 1: the better. All right, Okay, oh yeah, I appreciate you
Speaker 1: coming on here. Thank you so much. Oh you're welcome.
Speaker 1: A great night. How you taking easy? All right, we're
Speaker 1: back from break and Jimmy. A bunch of our listeners
Speaker 1: have d m us emailed us. Um, don't forget everyone
Speaker 1: that's listening right now. You can d m U s
Speaker 1: at how Many Things podcast or email us h M
Speaker 1: T at I Heart Radio dot com. Um, And if
Speaker 1: it's okay with you, I'm going to go through a
Speaker 1: couple of these questions. Sounds good when you're not working.
Speaker 1: What is your ideal date night? Huh, my ideal date
Speaker 1: night or my watch, my ideal date night is going
Speaker 1: to the house bowling maybe and my wife going to
Speaker 1: the bowling alley. But that's my ideal date night. Honestly,
Speaker 1: it would be going to the house, hanging out with
Speaker 1: my wife, you know, ordering some food, watching a TV show,
Speaker 1: or moving just laying in bad like I just I
Speaker 1: enjoy her company, like I really really do it And
Speaker 1: I don't have to be doing anything to be happy.
Speaker 1: Women are always said to do it all. How are
Speaker 1: you possibly dancing, touring and helping your wife with a
Speaker 1: new important baby. Well, I'll tell you what my wife's
Speaker 1: actually doing all that too. You know, you know, I've
Speaker 1: luckily been blessed to marry an amazing, strong woman who's
Speaker 1: doing the parenting right now, you know, while still supporting
Speaker 1: me touring and doing Dance with the Stars. So honestly,
Speaker 1: I'm doing all that because of her. What is your
Speaker 1: advice if a dad won't change diapers or help with feedings,
Speaker 1: how can that conversation be started? Man, throw it out
Speaker 1: there and say, hey, you're turning to change the diaper
Speaker 1: and the das I want to change. You don't love
Speaker 1: your kid, so you don't want to just you just
Speaker 1: want to. You could kid here in a in a
Speaker 1: dirty diaper because you don't want to get up and
Speaker 1: do it. Yeah, actually do that. Um, But also too,
Speaker 1: there's a balance, you know. I feel I feel like
Speaker 1: the mom is working and busy and the dad got
Speaker 1: a lot more free time change the diapers, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. I feel like it's that's the relationship
Speaker 1: I guess between each couple. You know, Um, if you
Speaker 1: have the free time to do it, do it. And
Speaker 1: I'm not making an excuse for people that are working
Speaker 1: and don't change diapers. But again, I'm in a city
Speaker 1: Wish where I've lucky enough to where my wife understands
Speaker 1: like I'm mom, I'm tired, you know, um, and she
Speaker 1: changes our children's diapers and don't even mentioned it. Every
Speaker 1: now and again, I might change the diaper, you know,
Speaker 1: but typically I'm I'm gone when I come home. I'm
Speaker 1: just so tired, you know, I hang out with her
Speaker 1: for a little bit, and if the baby's there and
Speaker 1: i'm you know, next to our go ahead and change
Speaker 1: the diaper. But again, I think it's each each relationship differs.
Speaker 1: You know, if you feel like you need help with
Speaker 1: the diapers, don't be afraid to ask that person for help.
Speaker 1: When we are all so busy and tired and still
Speaker 1: want to be affectionate. How do you show affection? What
Speaker 1: are your favorite ways someone shows you affection? See, I'm
Speaker 1: not honestly sure what my favorite way of affection is.
Speaker 1: I've never really narrowed in what my love language is. Um.
Speaker 1: But I know when it comes to my wife, I
Speaker 1: know she likes quality time. You know, that's a big
Speaker 1: thing for her. Um. She might not say it, but
Speaker 1: I think she loves words of affirmation UM. And I
Speaker 1: know for sure she loves physical touch. But when it
Speaker 1: comes to me, I honestly don't know. And then really
Speaker 1: stopped to figure that out. Are men attracted to women
Speaker 1: even if they're fresh after working out or waking up,
Speaker 1: depends on the guy. I think my wife looks great
Speaker 1: in the morning, you know. You know, I want to
Speaker 1: roll over and grab a kiss in the morning, even
Speaker 1: if she got her little glasses on with her bad breath,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I feel like when you're
Speaker 1: attracted to some person, it's the person you're attracted to,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. So whether you see them
Speaker 1: with makeup or without makeup, that's still the same person.
Speaker 1: So for me, attraction goes beneath the surface of the
Speaker 1: appearance in the face, you know what I mean. You're
Speaker 1: attracted to that person. You're attracted that person's soul. You're
Speaker 1: attracted to who they are. So whether they're fresh in
Speaker 1: the morning without makeup or with makeup, I personally prefer
Speaker 1: my wife without makeup. I'm all about that. Let me
Speaker 1: see you, you know what I mean. So that's that's
Speaker 1: what I'm into. When did you know you were ready
Speaker 1: to be married? And when did you know you were
Speaker 1: ready to have kids? Um? I feel like a kid thing.
Speaker 1: You can't really plan it, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Because I had my son when I was making nineteen
Speaker 1: thousand dollars a year, you know what I mean. So
Speaker 1: it's not really a right time or a wrong time
Speaker 1: to have children, it's just once they get here and
Speaker 1: making sure. I feel like it comes to making sure
Speaker 1: you're willing to do whatever it takes to provide for them.
Speaker 1: It's not about a certain job. It's not about making
Speaker 1: a certain amount of money. Um. Marriage for me hit
Speaker 1: me when I wasn't expecting it. You know, I was
Speaker 1: you know, I was starting to have success in music.
Speaker 1: I was single, I was traveling, I was having a
Speaker 1: good time. And then me and my wife connected and
Speaker 1: I don't know, it was just a shift for me.
Speaker 1: I was okay. Remember I told my cousin. I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm done retiring my jersey, hanging my sneakers up. He
Speaker 1: was like, really, I see yeah, because I found someone
Speaker 1: that for me, what was important is she's from my
Speaker 1: hometown where I'm from, and I love where I'm from.
Speaker 1: I'm very sentiment like at homesick a lot, so being
Speaker 1: with alexis for me it's like having a piece of
Speaker 1: home everywhere I go. Now, that was important for me,
Speaker 1: you know, someone that understood where I was from and
Speaker 1: someone that added to my life. And that's the big
Speaker 1: thing someone that asked to your life. That's when I
Speaker 1: felt like I was ready. But it wasn't a point
Speaker 1: where I said, when I get here in my career,
Speaker 1: when I do this and do that. And I felt
Speaker 1: like I knew I was ready by meeting the right
Speaker 1: person and actually thinking about, Hey, is this the person
Speaker 1: I want to be with, and then just making a
Speaker 1: decision to do it. This is a little bit of
Speaker 1: a longer email from Lindsay. She says, my husband has
Speaker 1: a child from a previous marriage and we have a
Speaker 1: new baby girl on the way. How do you make
Speaker 1: sure to make both kids feel special? Are there any
Speaker 1: phrases or activities my husband and I can do to
Speaker 1: make sure the love is spread evenly been in that
Speaker 1: situation My first son aid, and is from a previous relationship. UM,
Speaker 1: I feel like the biggest thing is always include the
Speaker 1: first child from the past relationship, you know, because a
Speaker 1: lot of times you can get so wrapped up in
Speaker 1: a new baby that you can unintentionally, you know, leave
Speaker 1: out the other kid. So just make sure whenever y'all
Speaker 1: have the kid, spend time with him, you know, do
Speaker 1: things with him and his new baby sibling. But also
Speaker 1: do things with just that child as well. UM. I
Speaker 1: feel like that's super important, just making sure they always
Speaker 1: feel included. Last question, what is the best advice you
Speaker 1: have for keeping a marriage solid? Man? This advice I'm
Speaker 1: giving myself the same time I'm giving you um communication
Speaker 1: which I suck at. UM. Making time for that other person,
Speaker 1: even if that means you don't get as much sleep
Speaker 1: as you want or if you're exhausted. Just just being
Speaker 1: honest about everything, even if it's something you think the
Speaker 1: other person doesn't want to hear. Just be honest. That's
Speaker 1: the biggest thing I've learned about being married is just
Speaker 1: be honest. See how you feel, because you can't read
Speaker 1: other person's mind and you don't know how they might
Speaker 1: feel when you say something or when you bring something up.
Speaker 1: So openness and communication is number one. And then you know,
Speaker 1: I don't want to say that word compromised because I
Speaker 1: don't really like that word compromised, because I don't really
Speaker 1: think the way I say sacrifice. I like the word
Speaker 1: sacrifice because to me, sacrifice means you're giving up something
Speaker 1: you want for the person you love because you love them.
Speaker 1: To me, the word compromise kind of means you're giving
Speaker 1: it up to avoid turmoil or avoid an argument, and
Speaker 1: that I don't think this should be about it to
Speaker 1: be about sacrifice. You know, you love that person and
Speaker 1: you're willing to give up something to make sure that
Speaker 1: happy because you love them. Hey, y'all, that was a
Speaker 1: good time. We answer some questions. Hopefully, um, someone heard
Speaker 1: something they need to hear to help their relationship continue
Speaker 1: to grow and help them with you know, getting into
Speaker 1: their next relationship. But yeah, you know you can catch
Speaker 1: me on all the social media's at Jimmy Allen as
Speaker 1: j I M M I E A L L E
Speaker 1: n um. Yeah. So it's been fun. I will see
Speaker 1: y'all soon. Make sure you tune in to the Disney
Speaker 1: Christmas special. You might see me on there and I'll
Speaker 1: see you all there. You have a happy holidays. Thanks
Speaker 1: for listening to How Men Think an I Heart Radio
Speaker 1: London Audio Production