Speaker 1: Okay does that count? No, it doesn't count. You got
Speaker 1: to see the people like, yeah, it's been a long time.
Speaker 2: It's been a long time coming.
Speaker 1: But here we go, you and me. That's my whole world.
Speaker 1: They whisper in the hallway. She's a bad, bad girl.
Speaker 1: So what Okay, good job, A good job.
Speaker 3: I ain't someone something was shouting, but I got the
Speaker 3: words wrong.
Speaker 1: Okay, well let's see what Noah can do.
Speaker 4: I'm drunk in the back of the car and a
Speaker 4: cry baby coming home the bar.
Speaker 1: Oh something time, but it but it was true. I
Speaker 1: don't want to keep.
Speaker 4: Secrets, just to keep you and snacks, not get through
Speaker 4: the garden gate every night summer.
Speaker 5: And as.
Speaker 1: I love you, ain't.
Speaker 3: The worst you everard not a nightmare, get in like
Speaker 3: a devil, devil. I was just thinking a nightmare. But
Speaker 3: that was great.
Speaker 2: I know, oh good, everything was like Taylor Swift.
Speaker 1: That was really good.
Speaker 2: Not you knew it all.
Speaker 1: I knew it.
Speaker 2: I didn't know we're doing.
Speaker 4: Just couldn't do it on the spot. Okay, let's start
Speaker 4: the show. This is great pre show banter.
Speaker 2: Test song, Oh yeah we killed Are you ready for it?
Speaker 1: And three two one the Nikki Glaser Podcast.
Speaker 4: Niklasers Nikky, Hello, it's me Snicky Glazer Podcast.
Speaker 1: Welcome to the show. Moms looking at me weird? Why
Speaker 1: I don't know, you're just looking at it because.
Speaker 4: Making again, it's like when you were tarp at the
Speaker 4: Taylor Swift concert when you were stuck inside that you
Speaker 4: were so funny.
Speaker 1: My hair's kind of way.
Speaker 4: Look you did you just get out of the shower
Speaker 4: or was there a rainstorm? Oh yeah, I always show
Speaker 4: up to things with wet hair. I'm sorry, there should
Speaker 4: be no shame.
Speaker 1: Women are always like, I'm my hair's wet.
Speaker 5: It's like anyone else would get ready for this? Not yes,
Speaker 5: but I'm like, I'm.
Speaker 1: Go with care. And we don't have any YouTube.
Speaker 4: Listeners unless we used to get hold on I forget
Speaker 4: or forgot to take off my shoes.
Speaker 2: I'm doing now, I'm going now.
Speaker 4: I'm doing no shoes for to get more fans on
Speaker 4: our YouTube because that's the only place you can.
Speaker 2: See my feet. It's on the dune. Yeah, oh there
Speaker 2: we go. Maybe I'll start putting them back on.
Speaker 4: So if you are into feet and bunions especially, you
Speaker 4: gotta check out the YouTube Ganel because I'm always hiding
Speaker 4: my feet, and I'm like, why what am I?
Speaker 1: What did I do to have these feet?
Speaker 4: They are kind of grotesque, but I did not try
Speaker 4: to make them grotesque. I didn't like them in some way.
Speaker 4: I'm a good person that's tried my best with my feet.
Speaker 4: I don't need to be ashamed of them. Even if
Speaker 4: they are like orange on the bottom from they're not
Speaker 4: orange or not.
Speaker 1: I was like, look at looking they are in the bottom.
Speaker 4: Really yeah, no, they your feet look great, mom, Look
Speaker 4: at that bunion sticking out.
Speaker 1: It's it's it.
Speaker 4: It looks like to the Northwest, I know, it looks
Speaker 4: like my dad's feet.
Speaker 1: Are you turned on by them.
Speaker 2: A little bit?
Speaker 4: This is talking about something, No, it's it's it is environmental.
Speaker 4: We both wear small shoes, but you know, really it's
Speaker 4: not a genetic it's it isn't fly research on bungeons
Speaker 4: wearing small shoes. Yeah, and then your bones will do that, yeah,
Speaker 4: because I well, I always wanted to have it. Looks
Speaker 4: pants used to look cuter with small shoes when I
Speaker 4: was in like collagen stuff like with flares, like you
Speaker 4: wanted to peek out like a little bit.
Speaker 1: So I would wear like eight and a half instead
Speaker 1: of nines. I have never heard this feet.
Speaker 2: It's going Japan.
Speaker 4: That's my foot looks like it was went through the
Speaker 4: fucking ming dynastic, the smallest feed in my family. Yeah,
Speaker 4: because you wore small shoes, because they never bought me
Speaker 4: new shoes. I know that's bullshit. It's a big woman.
Speaker 1: You had small shoes. You probably had shoes like a
Speaker 1: little pig like your your feet.
Speaker 2: These little clothing why they called me the hooves?
Speaker 3: These shoes are getting popular again the other day.
Speaker 1: Clothing. They freaked me out. Oh, I think they're so weird.
Speaker 1: You No, I didn't. You did on a show for
Speaker 1: a joke.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, they were literal horseshoes to make you look like
Speaker 4: a horse, because this was like for pony play.
Speaker 3: People that are like these are like goat shoes or
Speaker 3: what animal has cloven hooves? Pig pigs women, pig women,
Speaker 3: And there's no I'm gonna spend eight hundred dollars like Beyonce.
Speaker 4: Mom, when you hear Beyonce's the goat or something like that,
Speaker 4: what do you think.
Speaker 1: I've never heard that.
Speaker 4: You've never heard that. No one's ever called you the goat? No,
Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, so this is the thing is so funny.
Speaker 4: There's so many young women talking about how it was.
Speaker 4: I think it was like Meryl's Streep. Was Jennifer Lawrence
Speaker 4: or something was in an interview with Meryl Streep and
Speaker 4: she was like, hey, you know, and she's the goat.
Speaker 4: And she's like, why people always call me a goat?
Speaker 4: And I guess I look like one, but it's not
Speaker 4: very nice. And she's like, oh my god, MARYL. You
Speaker 4: thought it meant you look like a goat. You thought
Speaker 4: people were just openly calling you a goat to your face.
Speaker 4: It's greatest of all time.
Speaker 2: Oh okay.
Speaker 4: So someone's like, Julie, you're the goat. It doesn't mean
Speaker 4: they're lying.
Speaker 1: If they call you pig woman, that means the prettiest
Speaker 1: truth in the globe.
Speaker 2: Tom Brady's the goat, Michael Jordan's the goat, Lebron's the goat.
Speaker 2: I think goat's being over used a little bit. And
Speaker 2: now there's a new phrase called goaded. You've been goaded,
Speaker 2: which the kids are saying, which means like.
Speaker 1: That means we've crowned you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, or they just say goaded like like a phrase
Speaker 2: of affirmation. Goaded.
Speaker 3: I think I stop saying it.
Speaker 4: I don't mind any teen slang because we had it too,
Speaker 4: and old people were like.
Speaker 1: We like this them saying groovy.
Speaker 4: Or whatever, like there's always gonna be words that are
Speaker 4: new that old people are like, why are kids just
Speaker 4: saying sleigh instead of that sleighs or that?
Speaker 2: Like, just stop being old and accept.
Speaker 4: That there are young things that you're not into and
Speaker 4: it doesn't make them dumb, and it doesn't make you.
Speaker 1: Smarter it you had it too.
Speaker 4: I wish just to think of this, Like when miss
Speaker 4: Hannigan from Annie hated kids, I was.
Speaker 1: Like, you were a kid, what are you talking about?
Speaker 2: Did you hate yourself?
Speaker 4: She probably did, Like anyone who was like I hate children,
Speaker 4: I'm always just like, no, you don't. They always have
Speaker 4: to be they have to be putting their fingers together
Speaker 4: like slowly.
Speaker 2: Wait, let me give you a slang test. I see
Speaker 2: if you're familiar with some of these gen zs, I won't.
Speaker 1: Be, but it's not I'm not gonna be like upset
Speaker 1: about it, like they're so dumb these kids, Okay, what
Speaker 1: is I'm not.
Speaker 2: I don't claim to be a gen z expert or
Speaker 2: cool in any capacity, but I have learned a few phrases.
Speaker 2: Ap Okay, what does cap mean?
Speaker 1: That means like no cap like lying, that's cap man
Speaker 1: like you're lying.
Speaker 2: Yes, you could just say crap.
Speaker 1: I learned this from f F boy.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, you said crap instead of cap. Okay, what
Speaker 2: about bet?
Speaker 4: I use it as a sentence bet, literally, I like it.
Speaker 4: No one can know one my age or in my
Speaker 4: generation can judge anyone from using like to shortening things
Speaker 4: to one thing, especially in my group of friends. We
Speaker 4: changed Laura Holly's name from Laura Holly to Holly as
Speaker 4: her last name, to Halla to huh to.
Speaker 1: We just made it a sound, so there's you.
Speaker 4: Can stand here of your own language. We did cure
Speaker 4: I mean, and could cover so much. So okay, bet
Speaker 4: is what bet is like?
Speaker 2: For sure? Yes? I bet?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: You bet? Yeah, it's take off the U you bet.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Obviously this is too easy, you know. Cringe.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's like the number one thing I like worry
Speaker 4: about being. Oh it's almost like it's not so much
Speaker 4: like ew, it's like, oh god, that's so sad, right,
Speaker 4: Like when you see someone online like being and they're
Speaker 4: like trying to get attention and they're just like someone
Speaker 4: crying on Instagram is cringe?
Speaker 1: Well, how would they say it? Would they just go?
Speaker 4: They would They wouldn't say it. They would say to
Speaker 4: their friends behind that person's bag. No one ever would
Speaker 4: say the word cringe and that's it.
Speaker 1: Oh it's cringe. Oh that's cringe, she's cringe, or like
Speaker 1: ew cringe. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think that's how they'd say it. I mean, I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm an old woman, but some.
Speaker 2: Of these things I just learned on TikTok from like
Speaker 2: comments like did you know that? Instead of saying lol,
Speaker 2: kids are some kids are saying L E L. I
Speaker 2: don't know why, but that's what they're saying.
Speaker 4: I thought it was like a typo at first, and
Speaker 4: then almost like the nube I think was a typo,
Speaker 4: like when someone was saying like you're a nubie and
Speaker 4: someone spelled it noob and then that became like you're
Speaker 4: I think it was based on a typo. I do
Speaker 4: like the origin of words like this, do you have
Speaker 4: any more?
Speaker 2: No? But I have a question. So at what age,
Speaker 2: At a certain age or a certain developmental stage, everyone
Speaker 2: stops using the slang Like you don't see a lot
Speaker 2: of like seventy year olds walking around going like you know,
Speaker 2: oh yes you do, Like look at those Dappa legs.
Speaker 2: You know, like no one's talking like that, aymore. I
Speaker 2: feel you've learned.
Speaker 1: Like one hundred and ten that are so we need.
Speaker 4: But I will say that my parents whenever they ingest
Speaker 4: something legally in a state where it is legal to
Speaker 4: adjust marijuana in the form of a cookie or an edible,
Speaker 4: and they maybe have done it once or once in
Speaker 4: their life, what they will say A j you're getting
Speaker 4: off from that yet, and it's all getting high getting
Speaker 4: off And that was a common colloquial term. They always say,
Speaker 4: did you get off from that last night? And I'm
Speaker 4: always like, don't say that, And I go down You
Speaker 4: can't ask mom that and he's like, what, we had
Speaker 4: some edibles.
Speaker 1: I'm like, it sounds like you went down on.
Speaker 4: You're asking her about it when you say I had
Speaker 4: edibles and did she get off from it?
Speaker 1: I don't like it.
Speaker 2: Nikki, you getting off from that that hit you took.
Speaker 4: I'm just always like, and it could talk about like
Speaker 4: what you're feeling on drugs, like when I do drugs,
Speaker 4: I don't want to talk about I hate when any
Speaker 4: whenever I do drugs, I never want someone to be
Speaker 4: like you feel in it yet not because I'm.
Speaker 1: Like I am so much and get your face it's
Speaker 1: like Alice in Wonderland, up in your get your face
Speaker 1: out of mind.
Speaker 4: I'm just like I don't think it's cool. I'm ashamed
Speaker 4: of it. I just want to be in my head.
Speaker 4: That's how your dad talking, because dad is a healthy
Speaker 4: person that doesn't use drugs to like escape reality like
Speaker 4: I do. I use drugs to feel okay and just
Speaker 4: feel better about like to not be to not want
Speaker 4: to kill myself. Is when I'm drawn to drugs or
Speaker 4: just to like it's not usually to be like I
Speaker 4: want this laser show to be more trippy.
Speaker 1: It's like I don't want to want to.
Speaker 4: I don't want to lay in bed and think about
Speaker 4: suicide all day, so I'll smoke some weed, like.
Speaker 3: You just want to get off a little bit.
Speaker 1: But it's not I want to get off, it's just
Speaker 1: want to be.
Speaker 4: But when you use any drugs, it's like so associated
Speaker 4: with like you're doing it to like I don't know,
Speaker 4: like to party or whatever, and it's like I'm just
Speaker 4: doing it, so I don't the first thing I think
Speaker 4: of is to cut myself when I you know.
Speaker 1: Do something.
Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I want to be normal.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: My parents say get high when they're drinking wine. They're like,
Speaker 3: my god, a little high last night. I'm like weed
Speaker 3: and they're like, no, not grass. A couple of glasses
Speaker 3: of wine and are not films about us.
Speaker 4: I'm dying to hear more anecdotes about your parents being
Speaker 4: in Kingston right now on you begin, and I've heard
Speaker 4: a couple of them in the girls chat, but I'm
Speaker 4: just wondering which ones you can share here, and like
Speaker 4: why are you in hell? And like, just tell me
Speaker 4: what I'm in for because your parents are a little
Speaker 4: bit older than mine, a bit older. What are their ages?
Speaker 3: They're eighty and eighty one, but they wouldn't want me
Speaker 3: to tell you that, but they are. And they'll never
Speaker 3: hear this because yesterday my mom's like, well and podcast
Speaker 3: is for later?
Speaker 1: What is it? And I'm like, to be the app.
Speaker 1: I'm like this little purple thing on.
Speaker 3: Your iPhone that's the podcast app? And she's like why
Speaker 3: do people go here? I'm like, do you want to
Speaker 3: search for Russia or Putin?
Speaker 1: Are Ukraine?
Speaker 3: And she was like, oh my god, like it was
Speaker 3: a treasured I'm like, there are hundreds of Russian podcasts.
Speaker 1: Are you kidding me?
Speaker 4: Hundreds? There are hundreds of thousands, Yes, three.
Speaker 2: Billion podcasts that are on the like right now.
Speaker 1: And I've done No, there are a thousand of them. Yes,
Speaker 1: there are zero.
Speaker 4: Think how many people. That's why I always tell people,
Speaker 4: start a fucking podcast. If you were like someone that's
Speaker 4: in middim, like someone that has no potential of like
Speaker 4: making it in the world or whatever, but you always
Speaker 4: have this like secret passion to like be a broadcaster,
Speaker 4: or to be a comedian, or be an actress or
Speaker 4: some kind of like talking personality, start a fucking podcast.
Speaker 4: There's no shame in having zero listeners. You'll have someone
Speaker 4: will stumble upon it eventually and you'll have one listener.
Speaker 4: But it's there's no shame in it because everyone. Even
Speaker 4: when I started my first podcast in twenty ten, I'll
Speaker 4: never forget it was. You had to be there with
Speaker 4: Sarah Shaffer. You were so scared because we were like, oh.
Speaker 1: We're starting a podcast. Everyone has a podcast in two
Speaker 1: thousand ten.
Speaker 2: You were so ahead of the curve.
Speaker 4: We had that conversation though that, like this is so cliche.
Speaker 4: Everything I started since then, Yeah, always had that conversation.
Speaker 4: I go, it's irrelevant. That conversation is irrelevant. Podcasts are
Speaker 4: here to stay. It's the It's the first thing that
Speaker 4: anyone at home can do with a simple microphone. You
Speaker 4: gotta do it, and there's no judgment if you're not
Speaker 4: good at it or if no one listens, Like no
Speaker 4: one should listen. You are a dentist in Milwaukee, Like
Speaker 4: just start and then maybe something a couple people.
Speaker 5: Wait, you can just go on a podcast app and
Speaker 5: like you just.
Speaker 1: Put a podcast up an.
Speaker 2: No one needs to approve you need to approve you.
Speaker 5: And there's not like even you have to do so
Speaker 5: many at one No, I mean I do, could one
Speaker 5: contract my heart? But like I could, when we did,
Speaker 5: you had to be there. That was all up to us.
Speaker 5: We set the rules, we set the parameters, we set
Speaker 5: how many. If we missed an episode, we weren't like
Speaker 5: answering to someone. We didn't even have ads on that one,
Speaker 5: so we weren't making any money off of it.
Speaker 2: But past is the same way. This is the I
Speaker 2: didn't no one asked me to do that. Then I
Speaker 2: just kept going by yourself?
Speaker 1: Was it just you? Y?
Speaker 2: Isn't that cool?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I'm Do you think when Rupert Murdoch started Fox he
Speaker 2: was like, we're going to start another channel exactly like
Speaker 2: CBS NBC. Right. I do feel like there are some
Speaker 2: channels though that people should say that for these days,
Speaker 2: Like on cable. Have you seen cable lately? Oh God,
Speaker 2: there's some crazy channels out there. Have you seen Comedy
Speaker 2: dot TV?
Speaker 1: No, I know the other that brand.
Speaker 2: It's basically just like the Byron Allen Network. It just
Speaker 2: it's so fun to watch Comedy dot TV. I actually
Speaker 2: love what because it shows reruns of comedians doing things
Speaker 2: in like two thousand and five. It's like a time
Speaker 2: capsule of what comedy was like. Not that long ago
Speaker 2: that show, yeah, but like long enough to be like
Speaker 2: I saw a episode of What's the Show with Byron
Speaker 2: Allen comics Unleashed Leased, which is such a funny name
Speaker 2: because it's like they're the.
Speaker 1: Most game show.
Speaker 2: They could not be more leashed. But before the show started,
Speaker 2: Byron Allen came on. This is all from watching Comedy TV.
Speaker 2: A new channel on cable. If you have any cable,
Speaker 2: Byron Allen comes on. He goes, you're not gonna believe
Speaker 2: what I have on the show today. I call your family,
Speaker 2: call your friends, because I'm gonna show you something today
Speaker 2: that you have never seen. I promise you you have
Speaker 2: never seen it in your entire life. And then I
Speaker 2: watched the entire episode and I'm like, what the fuck
Speaker 2: was he talking about? He never brought that up again.
Speaker 2: And then it turns out what he was talking about
Speaker 2: was one of the comedians was trans. No, that's how
Speaker 2: different things were. He was saying it like, this is
Speaker 2: gonna blow your fucking guessing.
Speaker 1: It was a man to woman, a male to female
Speaker 1: female trans It.
Speaker 2: Was No, it was it was a man. It was
Speaker 2: a female and a man. Oh wow, yeah.
Speaker 1: And is that person still around around?
Speaker 2: They're still around there, still in La. I forgot their name,
Speaker 2: but uh, they're doing fine.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's so so fucking different back then. I I
Speaker 4: mean it, I saw I saw trans girl yesterday walking
Speaker 4: down in my neighborhood, and and I knew because she
Speaker 4: wasn't passing that well as a woman or you know,
Speaker 4: like but it doesn't matter, Like that's a look in
Speaker 4: and of itself too. She looked really pretty, and like
Speaker 4: I was just like, I'm always so proud of trans
Speaker 4: women amazing for like figuring it out, because can you
Speaker 4: imagine all of a sudden, always wanting to wear dresses
Speaker 4: and makeup and do your hair and all that stuff,
Speaker 4: and you just have to start on a dime the
Speaker 4: day you go, I'm out, And like we eased into
Speaker 4: it as as girls assist girls that were like born
Speaker 4: into it. Even when I first started wearing makeup, like
Speaker 4: I was getting it so wrong. In eighth grade, I
Speaker 4: found some notes that my friends wrote about me to
Speaker 4: each other being like did you see what Nikki tried
Speaker 4: to wear?
Speaker 2: It?
Speaker 1: It was so embarrassing just figuring out what's like.
Speaker 4: Even Noah has been a woman for a really long
Speaker 4: time and just was recently like what do women wear
Speaker 4: at my age?
Speaker 1: Like I don't know. She had to look at a
Speaker 1: list on Pinterest and follow it.
Speaker 4: Like I really give it up to every trans person
Speaker 4: out there who is trying to that is doing their
Speaker 4: best to like be themselves and fit into this new
Speaker 4: category for themselves out of nowhere. Because it is awkward.
Speaker 4: You get lots of stairs people whisper tons of shit
Speaker 4: about you.
Speaker 1: People have we.
Speaker 4: Conceived notions about it and it's and this girl, I
Speaker 4: was so worried for her because I had been walking.
Speaker 4: I'd finish my run and I was just going for
Speaker 4: a walk and I saw lots of like vagrant homeless
Speaker 4: people kind of screaming during this walk and kind of
Speaker 4: you know, would switch sides of the street to get
Speaker 4: away from it. And I'm like, if one of these
Speaker 4: people who's a little chaotic in the head see this girl,
Speaker 4: there could be violence, Like there could be an especially
Speaker 4: no offense. Like in certain communities it is really looked
Speaker 4: down upon to be a guy that is masquerading as
Speaker 4: a woman because that could trick them, and then they
Speaker 4: might get a blowjob from a man, and then what
Speaker 4: does that say about them? You know, and all these
Speaker 4: things and then there's violence. So I was I was
Speaker 4: wanting to like walk with her. I was like scared
Speaker 4: for her. So it's just so brave to me, and
Speaker 4: you should have said some Well I just not. I
Speaker 4: just like, well, I don't want to say anything. I
Speaker 4: just want to say she was like doing the she
Speaker 4: was doing paying the parking meter. And I always try
Speaker 4: to sneak in a girl when I run into female
Speaker 4: trans into trans women, I always try to go like
Speaker 4: love that coat, girl, like yeah, because they like to
Speaker 4: hear and because they're doing a good job of being
Speaker 4: a girl. And I have many transfer friends who are
Speaker 4: like the years go on and they pass more and
Speaker 4: more where you're like, I don't even remember. It takes
Speaker 4: a while though, just like it took us a while.
Speaker 4: So if you see a guy in a dress and
Speaker 4: you're like, what the fuck is this, give them a
Speaker 4: second to learn how to be a woman. And also
Speaker 4: if you tend to think that these people are doing
Speaker 4: it just for attention, I'm speaking to a small percentage
Speaker 4: of you, but you some some people do think this,
Speaker 4: and some people on the right side of things think this,
Speaker 4: that they're just doing it for attention. If you if
Speaker 4: you were so if your mind, you yourself person that
Speaker 4: I'm talking to, if you were so fucked up in
Speaker 4: the head or whatever that you decided to just become
Speaker 4: play like your trans to get attention, I think you
Speaker 4: deserve to be have a little sympathy your way, Like,
Speaker 4: even if someone's doing it for attention, that is so
Speaker 4: wack a do to go against what you naturally want
Speaker 4: to be, that you're like pretending to be a woman,
Speaker 4: even though you're not right. Then it's like your thing
Speaker 4: with the homeless. Remember the homeless man that like isn't homeless, right?
Speaker 4: And I go, Mom, leave him alone because we that
Speaker 4: is so direct changed to do that. He deserves our
Speaker 4: empathy or whatever money he's getting, because I wouldn't stand
Speaker 4: on on the fucking street and pretend that I'm homeless.
Speaker 4: So even if someone's pretending to be trans, which is
Speaker 4: such a small fucking percentage.
Speaker 1: A moneymaker, you might No, I wouldn't.
Speaker 2: I would.
Speaker 1: You would never do that.
Speaker 4: No one would ever pretend to be homeless if he's
Speaker 4: that crazy?
Speaker 3: Lois this guy him?
Speaker 1: He's just a guy. We don't know. I don't know him.
Speaker 1: But my mom screamed, and we know your we know
Speaker 1: what you're up to.
Speaker 2: We know you're and she's.
Speaker 4: And if he's willing to do that, let him have it,
Speaker 4: because I'm not willing to do that.
Speaker 2: Well, if he's harassing car the road.
Speaker 3: Maybe he's filming an episode of Nathan for you or something.
Speaker 4: No, he's been doing it for a while. We'll talk
Speaker 4: more about that. Well, this is the end of my
Speaker 4: trans rant. But if anyone transent over but love trans
Speaker 4: people obsessed with them keep fighting your good friend.
Speaker 2: Happy.
Speaker 4: Yeah, seriously at it. Happy Pride month. I love you
Speaker 4: all trans people. Okay, and we'll be back from break
Speaker 4: in just a second. All right. So you know that
Speaker 4: Noah went to the Taylor Swift concert with me Friday
Speaker 4: and we we got.
Speaker 1: The say swifty New Swifty in town.
Speaker 4: I'm like, here's the thing that she's released, all these
Speaker 4: like international dates, like tons more than her more than
Speaker 4: she has in the US, and oh my god, you're
Speaker 4: Chris and Chris. This is Chris's way of getting me
Speaker 4: to travel.
Speaker 1: Now he goes he sent me what is sweety? He
Speaker 1: goes here, He sent me all the dates. Why are
Speaker 1: you saying, here we go? What are you gonna say?
Speaker 4: Well, here we go to her favorite thing. That's how
Speaker 4: he's gonna get her to Singapore. Okay, well I get
Speaker 4: to see Singapore and Taylor Swift and so no he
Speaker 4: he sent me a screenshot and was like, I, uh,
Speaker 4: we should go pick one, pick these that you want
Speaker 4: to go to, and we'll try to go. And I'm like,
Speaker 4: this is the best thing because he'll get to go
Speaker 4: see his little country that he wants to go see
Speaker 4: and take out his postcards and go run around and
Speaker 4: try his little foods that he wants.
Speaker 6: And choose the country with no mountains so that you
Speaker 6: don't have to go hiking.
Speaker 2: Yes, you can go hiking without mountains. You can go
Speaker 2: hiking on the beach. You can go hiking dangerous.
Speaker 4: Chris doesn't love hiking. He likes He just likes moving.
Speaker 4: He likes being on the move. He doesn't like to
Speaker 4: sit and have like a nice tea. Tea, as Anya says,
Speaker 4: we learned in Europe. Sorry, I'm talking a million miles
Speaker 4: a minute, but I had just had a lot of day.
Speaker 1: Anya.
Speaker 4: We found out in Europe, and I found this for
Speaker 4: a while. But I just, you know, you notice something
Speaker 4: and you're like, I'm gonna wait for the right time
Speaker 4: to bring this up because she might be offended that
Speaker 4: I've been harboring this thought about her. But Anya, when
Speaker 4: she says the word ta, it takes.
Speaker 1: Her about thirty minutes to get thirteen.
Speaker 4: She says, oh, you guys, and does anyone want some tea?
Speaker 4: She lingers on the word tea. You'll start to notice it.
Speaker 4: She can't help it.
Speaker 1: She loves tea so much she wants to taste it.
Speaker 3: And she says it and then I caught myself, I
Speaker 3: do not. And then the next day I'd be like,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna get a cup of tea and it was
Speaker 3: just like a little long like, oh my god, I
Speaker 3: am doing it.
Speaker 4: What watch a couple episodes month wait for her to
Speaker 4: finish that.
Speaker 3: And then Nikki was like, it's actually a lot like
Speaker 3: the woman who cultivates bees.
Speaker 1: Have you seen her?
Speaker 3: And then she sent me all these instagrams that connection.
Speaker 1: Yes, saving the bees.
Speaker 2: Have you ever seen the bee woman?
Speaker 1: Yes, we talked about her on the show. Okay, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: long ago. But she Oh my god, you would love it.
Speaker 2: Mom.
Speaker 4: She's this woman that goes into places. She's obsessed with bees.
Speaker 4: She's in Texas and she goes in and rescues bees.
Speaker 5: It's like kind of seeing this girl's gonna be like
Speaker 5: a barn that's like, you know, bulldozed, and she's like
Speaker 5: and there was another great day of saving the bees.
Speaker 1: But she talks like a bee and so and that's
Speaker 1: why she doesn't get stung, is she is a bee.
Speaker 1: She like goes in and she's.
Speaker 4: Like, and I found the queen and then I placed
Speaker 4: her in the hive and then all the bees slowly
Speaker 4: went and met with her, and it was another great
Speaker 4: day of saving the bees.
Speaker 1: And I'm gonna go have some tea. But it's so soothing.
Speaker 1: It's so but she is a bee.
Speaker 5: That's amazing. Those people that go in and get the big.
Speaker 4: High I would do it in a second. I'm not
Speaker 4: scared of bees at all. It's one of my superpower.
Speaker 4: I'm not scared of bees.
Speaker 1: I've never been a girl that's like, get it away.
Speaker 1: I guess that's how they get Yes, if you.
Speaker 4: Are relaxed bees, bees will die if they sting you.
Speaker 4: They don't want to sting you, So if you were
Speaker 4: just relaxed around them, they could walk all over your hand.
Speaker 1: They're not going to sting you. If they're on your
Speaker 1: can don't go like yeah, but it doesn't hurt that bad.
Speaker 4: It's not like people act the way I act on
Speaker 4: two lane highways, like I have a right to highways
Speaker 4: for people driving around. There's a good chance that we will.
Speaker 4: There's not like, oh it's gonna hurt a little bit.
Speaker 4: We're gonna die catastrophically if there is any kind of
Speaker 4: user error. But then girls are like at a picnic
Speaker 4: table and a bee is on their soda and they
Speaker 4: start running around like there's a forest fire starting and
Speaker 4: it's like, calm down, just move the can gently to.
Speaker 1: Get at it.
Speaker 4: And they can't all be I think girls, it's like
Speaker 4: the word moist. They like being scared of little things,
Speaker 4: and I know that they are. I think some are
Speaker 4: actually scared, but I think it is and I've and
Speaker 4: I'm definitely guilty of this too. So if you're scared
Speaker 4: of bees, I'm not talking shit on you, because I
Speaker 4: do believe you have a real fear and we all
Speaker 4: have irrational fears. But I think that bees and sharks
Speaker 4: we all need to like cut a little slack and
Speaker 4: like chill out about and don't like freak out or
Speaker 4: bats and stuff like that.
Speaker 2: Alone. Really, I mean, I was walking around one of
Speaker 2: the places I stayed at. There were so many bats
Speaker 2: and they would just fly around. They would get really
Speaker 2: close to you as almost like they were like check
Speaker 2: it out, I'm gonna kill you, and it would fake
Speaker 2: you out, but it would never touch you. Never, never
Speaker 2: the location and the moms.
Speaker 4: Moms are like bat bat but bugs.
Speaker 2: Because a wasp could sting you over and over and over.
Speaker 4: It always looks like it's dragging cargo places like it's
Speaker 4: always just like, it's always hand it'll come back, and
Speaker 4: sting was.
Speaker 1: But I also why I know about these. I believe
Speaker 1: that wasps are only stinging. I could be wrong.
Speaker 4: I believe they only sting out of defense. So again,
Speaker 4: if you remain calm, nothing is going to hurt you
Speaker 4: in this. But that's what I'm saying. You have to, like,
Speaker 4: you have to talk yourself into understanding that the fear
Speaker 4: that you're thinking about is not real. The only reason
Speaker 4: that they would ever hurt you is because you're scared.
Speaker 4: So the thing that starts it is your fear. And
Speaker 4: if you can you know and listen. I have so
Speaker 4: many fears, so I don't know. I don't judge you
Speaker 4: if you're scared of wasp they are kind of creepy.
Speaker 4: But what I do know about crows is that the
Speaker 4: one of the funniest moments during eras on Friday night
Speaker 4: Noah Okay, So I was just whispering things of Noah's
Speaker 4: ear all night to just tell her what was coming
Speaker 4: up and things, and then all of a sudden, Willows
Speaker 4: starts the song Willow and it's the witchy one. It's
Speaker 4: like life was a Willow in it, but right to
Speaker 4: your whim. And she's dressed in like a cape and
Speaker 4: she has these orbs and they're all playing with them,
Speaker 4: and I go.
Speaker 1: This is my mom's favorite song.
Speaker 4: And then Noah's watching it, and then Noah whispers to me,
Speaker 4: what did you whisper?
Speaker 6: I was like, oh, I can see why Julie likes
Speaker 6: it because it totally has crow vibes. Right, that's all
Speaker 6: that's missing are the crows.
Speaker 2: It was so funny. I love crows.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Noah. It was so croy roy. It was
Speaker 1: crow Klardashian. It was. It was because it was so
Speaker 1: it was a crow vibe. You do like witchy things.
Speaker 1: I do. They are andurious and I like it.
Speaker 4: But you changed your mind crows to me. You like
Speaker 4: sent me a text one day that was like, sorry,
Speaker 4: I'm out on crows.
Speaker 2: Don't get me. Don't get me.
Speaker 1: Why researched it a bit? You get me a crow
Speaker 1: like I was talking.
Speaker 5: To my crow guy like you were in on and
Speaker 5: You're like, I'm gonna get her.
Speaker 1: Opened a place called the crow Bar. O god, that
Speaker 1: is so funny. Here's a great band called Crowbar.
Speaker 2: Really a crow bar?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, you're kidding, Brian.
Speaker 2: I'm going to kill you.
Speaker 3: There was a place in my town called two Ravens
Speaker 3: and it closed so you could, Oh.
Speaker 2: We could, we could know the difference between a raven
Speaker 2: and a crow.
Speaker 1: No, but I bet you do. And I was just
Speaker 1: about to ask, because we talked about this on the podcast,
Speaker 1: and I think we looked it up once, but we
Speaker 1: want to know again.
Speaker 2: Well, it's really difficult to tell them apart in my opinion,
Speaker 2: because I've been in parks and I've been like, oh,
Speaker 2: that's a crazy a raven. I messed it up like.
Speaker 4: That crass craven that was Wes craven.
Speaker 2: That starts.
Speaker 1: Start directing.
Speaker 2: Basically, if you want to tell them the different in
Speaker 2: the in the wild, if they're different, ravens are just bigger.
Speaker 2: That's that's how you tell. If it's a really big
Speaker 2: giant crow, that's probably a raven. You can also look
Speaker 2: at their like beaks a little curvier. But the way
Speaker 2: I tell them apart is that if you see a
Speaker 2: gigantic crow, it's most likely a raven. If you see a.
Speaker 1: Crow to like compare it to though.
Speaker 2: Well, you have to bring a crow with you wherever
Speaker 2: you go. For this to work.
Speaker 1: What will get you one? So you can tell what
Speaker 1: That's the only reason I want one.
Speaker 3: Compare them, But why are you off crows?
Speaker 5: Well, because if you do research them, they are really
Speaker 5: hard to take care of. Yeah, they they are very
Speaker 5: Did you just think it was going to it on
Speaker 5: your shoulder? You could see it like peanuts or whatever,
Speaker 5: and then it would just ship outside or something to
Speaker 5: get mad at you if you aren't giving him enough attention.
Speaker 5: And they you already live with.
Speaker 1: That's why when my mom and I were watching I
Speaker 1: think I told this on the podcast, but you made
Speaker 1: me laugh so hard. When we were watching that like
Speaker 1: Tom Hanks movie that we tried to start My name
Speaker 1: is Auto or saw a man named Otto. We started
Speaker 1: it and.
Speaker 4: It was like this just about this guy that's just
Speaker 4: like at a grocery store, like complaining about stuff.
Speaker 2: And ROM was like, I live with this.
Speaker 1: I don't need to watch it.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: It was just like a guy dad's age, being kind
Speaker 4: of like about like a nail.
Speaker 1: I must have been a bad day for your day,
Speaker 1: bad day.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, no, it was just it was cute. It
Speaker 2: was funny. You were trying to be funny. I met
Speaker 2: people who made a man called OUTO this weekend yesterday.
Speaker 5: Or yeah, I'm going to give it another chance, and no,
Speaker 5: we we just didn't want to because I can't.
Speaker 4: I kind of can't with Tom Hanks anymore. And I
Speaker 4: know that's crazy, but like I could if it was
Speaker 4: the right role. Wait, so you how did you meet
Speaker 4: the people from Man from Autoco?
Speaker 2: I was at a going away party for a friend
Speaker 2: and it was just like a bunch of Hollywood types.
Speaker 2: I didn't it was. It was crazy because.
Speaker 1: I went to this to them and say comedy or drama?
Speaker 2: Did you do you want me to talk to you
Speaker 2: or would you like me to leave? That's yeah, that's
Speaker 2: Brian's intro.
Speaker 1: He's on the picket lines for w GAHO Strike.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Are you still doing that?
Speaker 2: Brian? Just yeah, No, I went picketed. There was a
Speaker 2: G Word Adam Ruins Everything reunion at Netflix yesterday. It
Speaker 2: was actually right before. I'm so proud of myself for
Speaker 2: getting back to record the podcast in time because I
Speaker 2: was cutting close.
Speaker 4: Wow, good for you for going Okay, so you went
Speaker 4: to this party and these guys.
Speaker 2: There was a going away party for my friend who's
Speaker 2: going to the UK, and he's a little older than me,
Speaker 2: and I went to this party with Ali, thank god,
Speaker 2: because I did not know a soul at this party.
Speaker 2: Have you ever gone to a party and you're like,
Speaker 2: I do not know a single person here. I do
Speaker 2: not know what I'm doing here. I just want to hear.
Speaker 2: Then I just wanted to say goodbye to my friend.
Speaker 1: Who is Oh, so you knew one soul.
Speaker 2: I knew the person throwing the party, but.
Speaker 1: Everything he's busy.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I could talk to him for like five minutes, and
Speaker 2: then every single other person is.
Speaker 1: Wise or four.
Speaker 2: Yes, there you go.
Speaker 1: Good job, Brian.
Speaker 4: You know, I think I have been to I have
Speaker 4: done that before. I have been to yeah things, and
Speaker 4: I kind of wear it as a badge of honor
Speaker 4: of like, I don't know, like you're you just go
Speaker 4: up and talk to people. I know that seems like
Speaker 4: so impossible, but you just kind of you have a
Speaker 4: your story is I know no one here, and so
Speaker 4: now you have an end to talk to people to
Speaker 4: be like, I literally know no one here. Hi, I'm
Speaker 4: bron you know what I mean. Like that's your angle.
Speaker 2: That's if everybody was normal. But this was a Hollywood
Speaker 2: party and everyone was so Hollywood. I mean there was
Speaker 2: so much more like successful than me, and like they
Speaker 2: did not give a fuck about anything I had to
Speaker 2: say at any point. Yeah, so I would talk to
Speaker 2: people about you know, there are things and there were
Speaker 2: nice people there. I mean this is my friends, all
Speaker 2: their friends. But like, yeah, you can tell when you're like, wait,
Speaker 2: no one's asked me or Ali a single question this
Speaker 2: entire time. I've just been I've been going around interviewing people, right.
Speaker 3: The entire part.
Speaker 4: That's like going on dates with I think men and
Speaker 4: women do it to each other, but like, I feel
Speaker 4: you must have experienced that during your year of dating
Speaker 4: or whatever it was, where like some people just don't
Speaker 4: lob the question back or have any interest in you whatsoever.
Speaker 4: My parents and I we I used to have a
Speaker 4: good friend who would never ask me about myself.
Speaker 1: Do you remember.
Speaker 2: She's whispering it off camera if you're not on YouTube,
Speaker 2: she's whispering.
Speaker 4: Well, she'll remember. I had a friend back in the
Speaker 4: day that I would hang out with like all the time.
Speaker 4: And I started to say to my parents, like, and
Speaker 4: my parents really do have an issue with someone not
Speaker 4: like celebrating my accolades as my dad's.
Speaker 1: Especially your father. Yeah he does not.
Speaker 4: I have a story about that too, but like he yeah,
Speaker 4: he just they can't stand when like I've done something cool,
Speaker 4: or the family's done something cool, or like my mom
Speaker 4: has like built a fireplace with like done stone work,
Speaker 4: and they'll walk in and they won't say anything about it,
Speaker 4: even though they know it's brand new. Like they withhold
Speaker 4: like compliments because they're fucking jealous. Like that kind of person.
Speaker 4: We have a lot of those people in our family
Speaker 4: in our life. Like it's just and and I could
Speaker 4: be that way too with people. My ugliest side of
Speaker 4: myself is when someone wants the compliment desperately and I
Speaker 4: just will like be like not gonna give it, Like
Speaker 4: I don't know when like I just there were times
Speaker 4: there are times where people just you just feel them
Speaker 4: want it so much and you're like, I know this
Speaker 4: would make you happy because you want it, but you're
Speaker 4: trying too hard, buddy. You gotta like yeah, Like one
Speaker 4: time someone was like shredding on Anya's guitar, Like backstage,
Speaker 4: this guy that worked at this venue was like shredding
Speaker 4: on her guitar right, and you could tell that he
Speaker 4: It was impressive of what he was doing, and you
Speaker 4: could tell he desperately wanted us to be like whoa man,
Speaker 4: because like it was cool, and you didn't.
Speaker 1: But I I.
Speaker 4: Was so annoyed because he was doing it too hard.
Speaker 4: So it was like mad, probably, yeah, your guitar, I like,
Speaker 4: get off of it. But we said it was so
Speaker 4: hard to say nothing.
Speaker 2: When you put it down. It was just a silent
Speaker 2: green room.
Speaker 4: It was so good because you know, all he was
Speaker 4: doing was trying to get us to go like holy shit, man,
Speaker 4: And in my head I was thinking that, but.
Speaker 6: He's so cool and so all the time at like
Speaker 6: guitar center or any kind of music shop you go do,
Speaker 6: there's so many of those people there ate it.
Speaker 5: But when it's someone's guitar, like Anya's guitar, were threes
Speaker 5: even worse worse. We're the enneagram for this kind of
Speaker 5: person is a three. And I'm that kind of person too,
Speaker 5: But I play it a little bit cooler. I'm desperate
Speaker 5: for approval and compliments, and I will. But I I
Speaker 5: did the thing of like certain for my looks and
Speaker 5: my like outfits and stuff. I told my friends and
Speaker 5: like two thousand, it was probably twenty eighteen or nineteen
Speaker 5: to not compliment my looks anymore.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, ever, I remember you even said that to me.
Speaker 4: And even though I want it desperately and I depend
Speaker 4: on it, now I've safeguarded myself that I think every
Speaker 4: time they want to and they just can't. So now
Speaker 4: if they don't do it, it's because they want to,
Speaker 4: and they they I told them not to, and if
Speaker 4: they but if they genuinely.
Speaker 1: Don't even think my ouf, it's cute. I've now convinced.
Speaker 4: Now I'm safe in my head right and if they
Speaker 4: want to, they can, so it safeguards me. But I'm
Speaker 4: totally like that person. I just have a little bit
Speaker 4: more self awareness to not look so desperate. But I
Speaker 4: have been desperate before. But we were talking about oh
Speaker 4: people coming in.
Speaker 2: Oh.
Speaker 4: So, I had this friend that was never giving me,
Speaker 4: never asking me about me or any like any interest
Speaker 4: in anything.
Speaker 1: Let's like leave compliments out of it. Who gives a shit?
Speaker 4: And one time my family, I was like, I'm gonna
Speaker 4: invite him over. It's like kind of the final straw
Speaker 4: with him. I'm out of this relationship. Yeah, do you
Speaker 4: remember who this was? I think so, And we invited
Speaker 4: him over and we just we played a game where
Speaker 4: it was like, let's see how long he can be
Speaker 4: here without saying without in our kitchen, in our house,
Speaker 4: and not comment one thing or ask one inquisitive, curious
Speaker 4: question about anything to do with anything outside of himself.
Speaker 4: And he didn't do it for hours. And that's when
Speaker 4: I was like, I'm I'm gonna start ghosting this friendship
Speaker 4: and we're not close anymore. And I mean I see
Speaker 4: him every now and again, and I love when I
Speaker 4: see him because I do have cherished memories from our friendship.
Speaker 4: But you gotta go, you gotta be, you gotta kate.
Speaker 2: Yes, Yes, the record, on the on the on the party,
Speaker 2: I do want to say that the producer, whoever it
Speaker 2: was for, a man called Otto. I talked to them
Speaker 2: for her for a long time and she was the
Speaker 2: only one that asked me questions. So for the record,
Speaker 2: that's nice as everyone I was good. I don't want that, yeah,
Speaker 2: because that was the only thing I named.
Speaker 3: R Wes Anderson and Tom Hanks is in it, and
Speaker 3: I gotta say, even though I didn't love the thing,
Speaker 3: I enjoy it.
Speaker 1: What did your What did you say about the film?
Speaker 2: It made me laugh.
Speaker 1: It's like your it's your most it's your most cutting
Speaker 1: the criticism ever.
Speaker 2: And I've already said that on the podcast about something else.
Speaker 4: But it's so funny to say this about something, and
Speaker 4: I want everyone to start using it when it's appropriate.
Speaker 3: I love Wes Anderson. Yeah, I loved Argiling Limited. I
Speaker 3: love the Royal Tande Moms with all my heart. I
Speaker 3: think they're genius, and I do love a couple others.
Speaker 3: But I will say in the past few years it
Speaker 3: has seemed like he is more and more concerned with aesthetics,
Speaker 3: and I just don't get a vibe that, uh, he's
Speaker 3: like in touch with his sexuality. I'm not saying I'm
Speaker 3: not not accusing him of being.
Speaker 1: He's not having sex. He's not having sex.
Speaker 4: Funny to me because we all know art where we're like,
Speaker 4: this person's not getting laid like something. They're they're a
Speaker 4: little frustrated, they're too cute. See, they're like they're not
Speaker 4: in their sexuality. Yes, yes, it's like a little kid.
Speaker 3: It's a movie for child, for children, but it's for adult.
Speaker 4: I was listening to and he was like, these people
Speaker 4: sound like they've never had sex.
Speaker 3: I really is ever like you hear a band, and
Speaker 3: you're like, oh, fuck yeah, like these drums.
Speaker 4: This guy's fuck my god, these guys fucking all the time.
Speaker 3: But Tom Hanks's hair is so beautiful in this film.
Speaker 2: I don't know if his real.
Speaker 3: Hair it looks like it it's white and silvery or
Speaker 3: it's an amazing wig.
Speaker 1: But he looks so dapper.
Speaker 3: And I will say, Wes Anderson, like, the aesthetics of
Speaker 3: this movie are so beautiful. It's called Asteroid City. Everyone's
Speaker 3: skin is like this cool, weird orangey tan. Everyone's lipstick
Speaker 3: is this beautiful red orange red. It's amazing. Everything's like
Speaker 3: pastel blue and yellow and pink and scarlet. Your hands
Speaker 3: and is great. Okay, Tom Hanks looks great.
Speaker 1: Don't worry.
Speaker 4: Wes Anderson's not watching this. He's not gonna take a sense.
Speaker 4: He knows he's cutesy.
Speaker 1: Film.
Speaker 4: Film directors understand that there's going to be criticism about
Speaker 4: what they do. Every creator does you know, like this
Speaker 4: is going to exist. It's okay to have a criticism.
Speaker 4: I watched last night, so no Anya's favorite director is
Speaker 4: no a Bombak okay, Bomba I've back or.
Speaker 3: Whatever, I've never I will say anything is funny.
Speaker 2: It is.
Speaker 4: I've never watched any of the and have you watched
Speaker 4: his films?
Speaker 2: Brian, he went to college with one of my ex girlfriends.
Speaker 2: So I am, I'm all in the bomback verse?
Speaker 1: Yeah, well is it back or back? I want to
Speaker 1: just get it right.
Speaker 2: Sounds like a tool.
Speaker 4: Okay, we'll say bomb back, bomb back Okay, so no,
Speaker 4: no a bomb back back.
Speaker 1: I watched Francis HA was my first.
Speaker 2: Francis made me weep tears, weep, yes.
Speaker 1: Wept, yea, I weeped and weep.
Speaker 2: I weed over the box. I couldn't stop crying after watching.
Speaker 1: Why Why Oh?
Speaker 2: It just struck me. The parents at the end, watching
Speaker 2: her go and then her finding herself, and it just
Speaker 2: reminded me of.
Speaker 1: Me, reminded me of girls.
Speaker 2: And if you loves I feel like if we loved
Speaker 2: your parents.
Speaker 4: And you know those are real parents, Gretager, real parents. Yeah,
Speaker 4: there was some scenes.
Speaker 2: What is this?
Speaker 1: It's a it's a film.
Speaker 4: It's a film about a girl in New York City
Speaker 4: who was like trying to find herself. It's called Francis
Speaker 4: ha H Francis f R A n c E S
Speaker 4: HA and it I find I've only watched two of
Speaker 4: his own, and so I watched that one, and then
Speaker 4: I watched Greenberg and she's also I love Greta Gerwig.
Speaker 1: I will watch anything.
Speaker 4: I just love the way she talks and it's kind
Speaker 4: of like this and just really like she almost draws
Speaker 4: out her words like tea, and it's like, I just
Speaker 4: love her face and her look, and she's not super skinny,
Speaker 4: which I appreciate about, like any so tired of seeing
Speaker 4: like exic actresses and like people who are just like
Speaker 4: stunningly like you know, filled up and all this stuff,
Speaker 4: like I just can't really deal with anymore. There's a
Speaker 4: new video that shows what Jaylaw has done to her
Speaker 4: face by Lori Hill, who is my like god on
Speaker 4: who like she's she's the girl on YouTube who will
Speaker 4: tell you what actresses have done when they don't tell you,
Speaker 4: because she has had all the stuff done and she
Speaker 4: is trained to know.
Speaker 1: And there's a new video that she's.
Speaker 4: Like, I think it's one of my best videos ever
Speaker 4: that I did on Jayla and to show what perfect
Speaker 4: choice is that Jayla has made on her face.
Speaker 1: She talks exactly like that and and I can't even
Speaker 1: watch it because I want to get it all done
Speaker 1: because Jaylaw does look amazing. It doesn't look like she
Speaker 1: has worked one. Yeah, and there's no shame in it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but if you saw Ledge Ones, she's so But
Speaker 4: I can't wait to see her new film anyway, Francis
Speaker 4: ha I, uh whatever.
Speaker 2: I liked it.
Speaker 1: It's all in black and white. It makes a little
Speaker 1: hard to watch, but I'm like, was like fucking three stooges.
Speaker 1: I love that. Yeah, it's cool, but it's kind of caa, like,
Speaker 1: we we get.
Speaker 2: It, you're cho why was it? That's the thing.
Speaker 1: That's that's what I want to know.
Speaker 2: Why I get it in Roger Rabbit Okay.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because it's like there's like a world that yeah, or.
Speaker 2: In the what's the Wizard of the Wizard of Oz
Speaker 2: that makes sense?
Speaker 4: Or when they could didn't have color film yet, like
Speaker 4: any movie that's fit into that genre. Yeah, the SmartLess Stock, Yeah,
Speaker 4: the SmartLess Stock is also in black and white, and
Speaker 4: I like it. By the way, whenever you take a
Speaker 4: picture of yourself and you put it into black and white,
Speaker 4: you look prettier. Yeah, I love so it is there's
Speaker 4: a reason.
Speaker 2: Because he is watching black and white movies, been like
Speaker 2: this is so cool. Why is there no color?
Speaker 1: They were think that's so funny.
Speaker 4: So anyway, I watched Greenberg and Brian, you are Greenberg.
Speaker 2: I haven't seen Greenberg.
Speaker 3: So many times you I want you to watch it.
Speaker 4: It's good, it's been still plays this guy who's like
Speaker 4: got out of a mental institution. That is, no, that's
Speaker 4: not why you're Greenberg. You gotta have a mental institutione.
Speaker 4: He's staying at his brother's house while they're on vacation.
Speaker 4: His brother's a big time Hollywood successful guy. His whole
Speaker 4: family's out of town, so they he's staying. You just
Speaker 4: gotta have a mental hospital. So he's staying at his
Speaker 4: brother's house to take care of their dog and just
Speaker 4: like house guest while they're out of town. But they
Speaker 4: also have a housekeeper who's played by Greta Gerwig, the
Speaker 4: girl who I really like, who talks like this all
Speaker 4: the time. It's all on Netflix, these these both these movies.
Speaker 4: And then she is and then they kind of develop
Speaker 4: a relationship reluctantly.
Speaker 1: And he's like.
Speaker 4: Forty forty nine I think is or he's like mid forties,
Speaker 4: and she's like twenty three, which is problematic for me,
Speaker 4: not problematic in the sense that you know is think
Speaker 4: gets to be canceled.
Speaker 1: But I'm just like, is it true? Is she that
Speaker 1: age in the movie?
Speaker 5: Yes?
Speaker 1: But in real life well, and when she shot the movie.
Speaker 4: This is a long time ago. This is like twenty
Speaker 4: ten movie came out. I don't think twelve maybe.
Speaker 3: But it's the kind of guy all of us know
Speaker 3: who is reminiscing about his past in a band. He
Speaker 3: was signed for like eight months and he cannot stop
Speaker 3: talking about these eight months of his life where he
Speaker 3: was signed.
Speaker 1: No, he that's not true. Sorry, yeah, he couldn't.
Speaker 4: He's the one that gave up on the band, right,
Speaker 4: So he's like in the.
Speaker 3: Past and he cannot get past his his days of
Speaker 3: like I had this deal.
Speaker 4: But if you know, yeah, he's one of the people
Speaker 4: that are like these kids are saying cap now and
Speaker 4: it's like, yeah, well you're old, that's why like it,
Speaker 4: move on and so but Brian, I think you should
Speaker 4: watch it because he really reminded me of you and
Speaker 4: that his like how he's a really good person, but
Speaker 4: he can be very blunt and like have strong opinions
Speaker 4: that can sometimes be uh like, people can take as
Speaker 4: like this guy is maybe rude, or something, not that
Speaker 4: I've ever thought you were rude, but like you.
Speaker 1: Know, Brian, no, why anything bad.
Speaker 2: I'm trying. I know, I like this because I'm trying
Speaker 2: to figure that out, especially like on stage, you know,
Speaker 2: I want to make sure that I'm being my authentic self.
Speaker 1: You know what can help.
Speaker 4: I haven't seen you on stage ever, No, no, no,
Speaker 4: definitely not.
Speaker 2: You're so good.
Speaker 4: Like I would and this is just me not having
Speaker 4: seen you for literally almost eight years now. But like
Speaker 4: anything that might be off putting to the audience about
Speaker 4: you and your intensity can be offset by you, like
Speaker 4: smiling a little bit or laughing at what you're talking
Speaker 4: about and not trying to stay in the frame of
Speaker 4: mind when you wrote it, and having more of a like.
Speaker 4: I just think any comedian can benefit from smiling more
Speaker 4: in their act, and obviously including me. I've been watching
Speaker 4: footage and I'm like, if you smile more, people are
Speaker 4: gonna know that you're joking and they're not gonna cause
Speaker 4: it's and that's not a trick.
Speaker 1: Yes, it's not a trick.
Speaker 4: It's just like in my head, I'm trying to recreate
Speaker 4: as angry as I was when I wrote this joke.
Speaker 4: So that it's you know, perfectly exemplified, but like they
Speaker 4: need to be let in on the fact that I
Speaker 4: know I'm kidding a little bit and then I'm having fun, right,
Speaker 4: And smiling can be overused, but I think that, I mean,
Speaker 4: I learned her watching Taylor Swift.
Speaker 1: I'm not even gonna lie.
Speaker 4: My performance on Saturday Night was amazing because I just
Speaker 4: watched her on Friday Night and just like her interactions
Speaker 4: with the crowd, her being so grateful that they're there,
Speaker 4: her just like enjoying every moment, and it just you know,
Speaker 4: it's it's really good for me to see all these
Speaker 4: fucking contracts. I'm going to see Ben Folds tonight.
Speaker 3: Actually, wait, can I ask a question about the Brian thing?
Speaker 1: Rely quick? So when he when he.
Speaker 3: Has a joke that he thinks might be off putting
Speaker 3: or ostracizes the audience, you're saying, smile a little bit, right,
Speaker 3: because that gives the audience a clue that he's in
Speaker 3: on this.
Speaker 1: He's not a freak.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't think it's like a hundred and I
Speaker 4: don't even think that's his issue.
Speaker 3: But what if he doesn't know which joke to smile on,
Speaker 3: Like what if He's like, miss, are you.
Speaker 4: Making all go out there and be a little bit
Speaker 4: cheerier in general for every kind of performer unless it's like.
Speaker 1: Really your bag to be like, Okay, let's see.
Speaker 4: I mean jessel Nick smiles at his jokes, and his
Speaker 4: jokes are because he's so he just has like a
Speaker 4: little yes, he has a little sociopathic smile.
Speaker 1: Yeah, let's hear an example.
Speaker 3: About what like a like a piece of your act
Speaker 3: that you ask you did.
Speaker 2: I would never do this. I don't go out I.
Speaker 1: Don't go out there and throlling with it.
Speaker 2: I find that if I do, if i'm if I'm
Speaker 2: smiling more, I'm just having more fun and then that
Speaker 2: makes the set better.
Speaker 1: Yes, and I do too.
Speaker 2: A lot of my stuff on stage is talking about
Speaker 2: how I'm like a curmudgeon and kind of like I
Speaker 2: have like an old man vibe to me, and so
Speaker 2: it does go along with you know, uh, not smiling.
Speaker 2: But and then that's what I was saying about just kidding.
Speaker 2: Remember last week, Yes, I said I had to learn
Speaker 2: how to say just kidding because so many times I
Speaker 2: would say something that was a joke and be like
Speaker 2: and people would be like, what are you talking about
Speaker 2: and then so I learned to go joke, joke, joke,
Speaker 2: I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding, and then that puts people.
Speaker 2: I don't know what that makes people feel, but at
Speaker 2: least they know I'm joking.
Speaker 4: I've recently said when people get offended or go like, WHOA,
Speaker 4: that's too much, I go. I've said, let me just
Speaker 4: backtrack and say I've done nothing wrong here, and what
Speaker 4: I've said. All I've said is that Anthony I made
Speaker 4: a reference to Anthony Bourdain committing suicide in a hotel.
Speaker 1: He did that. I didn't do it to him. I'm
Speaker 1: not making fun of it. I'm literally, oh, did you
Speaker 1: guys just find out?
Speaker 2: I like, talk them through it.
Speaker 4: I go, your offense is not warranted, Like I understand
Speaker 4: if I'm like in that fucking idiot hung himself in
Speaker 4: that place.
Speaker 2: I'm not saying that.
Speaker 4: I'm not saying, oh, his daughter's said, isn't that hilarious?
Speaker 1: You lost her dad.
Speaker 4: I'm just stating that he did it, so I'm not
Speaker 4: then you should get mad at Tom broke Off, who
Speaker 4: broke the news to you too, then, because I'm doing
Speaker 4: nothing different than that. I'm just referencing it, and yes
Speaker 4: it is a punchline, but it's not making fun of him,
Speaker 4: you gotta know, Thedemirance. I think that instead of saying
Speaker 4: just canning yell at them about why you're.
Speaker 2: Right, We'll be right back with moresout.
Speaker 1: What are you? What are you looking at? I'm just thinking.
Speaker 5: I'm just thinking. You know, you were talking about how
Speaker 5: people were like, oh god, how dare you people? Why
Speaker 5: don't you find this in your audience? I mean that
Speaker 5: people are looking to find something off like that, to say.
Speaker 4: Oh, because they have no identity because they're white and
Speaker 4: we don't have a lot of culture, and so people
Speaker 4: need to identify themselves by what they're offended by.
Speaker 1: Means that I'm something like what was that? Why would
Speaker 1: they pay money?
Speaker 4: Because they take away friend likes me or their son
Speaker 4: or they're like it's always the person that doesn't is
Speaker 4: brought along. And Rob Thomas and I were talking about
Speaker 4: the person who gets brought along and is just sitting
Speaker 4: there like a grump the whole time because they're like
Speaker 4: jealous of their partner and and yeah, it's true, like
Speaker 4: I I identify as a swifty because I'm white.
Speaker 1: I have nothing else.
Speaker 4: I don't have like a culture to be like, wow,
Speaker 4: this is who I am, Like I'm boring, I'm a
Speaker 4: basic bitch, and so I grasp onto this identity because
Speaker 4: I want to feel different. I want to feel unique,
Speaker 4: and my obsession with her makes me feel that way,
Speaker 4: and a lot of people don't have that.
Speaker 2: I would suggest help one to get into Taylor Swift.
Speaker 2: I want to help the whites. For a second, you are,
Speaker 2: but yeah, I feel like there's a way we can
Speaker 2: figure because because I think sometimes white people feel like
Speaker 2: they have no culture at all, and I think sometimes
Speaker 2: they're overlooking or they're discounting the culture that they have.
Speaker 2: Like if you're if you're gen.
Speaker 4: You're houd to have culture, though, why not like because
Speaker 4: people are just like it's fucking white people ship Like
Speaker 4: it's like I.
Speaker 2: Don't think we should culture and that's.
Speaker 4: Why people latch onto that or they like wear like
Speaker 4: this is all dumb ship. It's not like can take
Speaker 4: cloths and like things that actually have meaning and like
Speaker 4: you know, head.
Speaker 5: Wrap or yeah or what do you think that? It's like, oh,
Speaker 5: I don't get that. Where you go to another state,
Speaker 5: why do they talk.
Speaker 4: If I'm around Kirston, I start talking like Kirston if
Speaker 4: I'm because.
Speaker 1: You know, I want to know where this lazy talk comes.
Speaker 4: Because it's just a different way laugh man, you know,
Speaker 4: and it's hot and it's cool.
Speaker 1: Yeah that I literally get a little tired. I love it.
Speaker 4: Why does anyone have any different dialect? It's because it's
Speaker 4: just you know, it's.
Speaker 1: It just seems sloppy to me. It is Kirston talks.
Speaker 1: What does she do well?
Speaker 4: Like, if I'm around Kerson, I'll be like doing Kirsten
Speaker 4: things like I don't know, I don't know how to
Speaker 4: describe it, but I'll be.
Speaker 3: Like, do you think it's cool if we like run into.
Speaker 4: This my impression of Kirsten, But like I will, I
Speaker 4: will start impersonating Kirsten. My whole act is just all
Speaker 4: of my funniest people together, my personal person on stage.
Speaker 1: When I do something that's like and.
Speaker 4: That's a little bit Chris Convey, Lizzie Cooperman, there's I
Speaker 4: do you where it's like I'm not doing that and
Speaker 4: you know, like any kind of thing because I'm I'm
Speaker 4: a person that has cut out magazines and made a
Speaker 4: collage and that's.
Speaker 1: I have a chameleon.
Speaker 2: Yes, I yah that's right. That's what artists do.
Speaker 4: They absorb things around that. And there's some artists, and
Speaker 4: there's some things I do that are completely unique and
Speaker 4: and and me. But I would say I paint with things.
Speaker 4: I pick up things from other people that I go,
Speaker 4: that's really funny.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna use that.
Speaker 4: And I usually I don't think that I'm gonna use it,
Speaker 4: but my subconscious mind does.
Speaker 1: But well, you think it's funny, so you catch it, yeah.
Speaker 4: Or I'll just like yeah, I'm trying to think of
Speaker 4: an example, but yeah. Chris always used to be.
Speaker 1: Like and then that, and.
Speaker 4: Like he would do and he would kind of say
Speaker 4: things like that, and I'm like, I'm not gonna do
Speaker 4: that ever, and I was like, that's a really funny
Speaker 4: way to say that, And so I just started doing
Speaker 4: it because it was funny, and then it made it
Speaker 4: in my act and now it's like a way, now
Speaker 4: it seems like something I created, but I did it.
Speaker 1: I just you created it and he picked it up.
Speaker 4: It was it was always God Christ, I get a
Speaker 4: break here.
Speaker 1: I think you start. You've been doing that for a
Speaker 1: long time.
Speaker 4: Really, yes, no, I can. I'm almost positive I got
Speaker 4: it from him.
Speaker 2: Sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I really remember hearing him do that and then catching
Speaker 4: myself doing it.
Speaker 2: Anyway, that's very Chris No. I saw when I saw
Speaker 2: a comedian smile, and then I said, I think I
Speaker 2: should start smiling.
Speaker 1: Yeah before Brian. Brian's going to be like grinning, like,
Speaker 1: oh God, please deal with cards that looks like a
Speaker 1: crand emoji cards.
Speaker 4: No, I mean, Brian, didn't you impersonate a comedian when
Speaker 4: you first started?
Speaker 2: Oh my god, who did you? There was a time
Speaker 2: when I called myself frantic FRANNGI not literally in my head.
Speaker 2: I was like I'm frantic because I would go on
Speaker 2: stage and I would be like, you know, kind of
Speaker 2: like a Richard Lewis style, what's going on everything? So
Speaker 2: why am I? Oh? And then I got this going
Speaker 2: on and then and there was just yelling and so
Speaker 2: out of.
Speaker 1: Control under your hat. Like I used to hear about
Speaker 1: Richard Lewis.
Speaker 4: The one anecdote I heard about him was that he
Speaker 4: waits in a limo outside the door to the green room,
Speaker 4: like outside the door to the theater, and they're like
Speaker 4: they're ready for you, and he walks straight on stage
Speaker 4: and then straight back into his limo.
Speaker 1: He spends no time in the building.
Speaker 2: He just goes.
Speaker 1: And I remember using.
Speaker 4: To think, like that's insane, Like how doesn't he have
Speaker 4: to prepare? And like what how does he know what
Speaker 4: he's gonna say? Like he just goes, And now I'm like,
Speaker 4: that would be he's preparing. That's my ideal, Yeah, is
Speaker 4: to not prepare at all, have no chance to know.
Speaker 4: You're just in a limo on your phone or something.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I would think. Okay, So Richard Lewis you
Speaker 4: impersonated who else?
Speaker 2: Ever? There was the waiting Mullaney. I mean I impersonated
Speaker 2: mulaney a little bit, I guess as it. I mean,
Speaker 2: there was all There was the era of the baby Bird.
Speaker 2: I definitely, yeah. It was a little you know, there
Speaker 2: was this period of time between twenty twelve to twenty
Speaker 2: sixteen or something twenty now, Yeah, where every male comedian,
Speaker 2: every white male comedian in New York City was like
Speaker 2: trying to do a little Bill Burr impression called.
Speaker 4: The baby up in the Baby Hedburg phase of like
Speaker 4: so many guys just like talking like this into a
Speaker 4: microphone and just going like like doing one liners and
Speaker 4: looking down and dying of heroin overdose.
Speaker 2: But and Norm McDonald doing the you know, the leaning
Speaker 2: into your punchline stuff.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Norm McDonald.
Speaker 4: I saw a clip yesterday and I was like, Jesus Christ,
Speaker 4: this guy is so fucking good because he took a
Speaker 4: he took a trope that I'm just like, what are
Speaker 4: you going to get out of this? Like you know
Speaker 4: they say, you know what happens in Vegas States. Oh
Speaker 4: my god, is so good because that is such a
Speaker 4: tiring what thing?
Speaker 1: Like the punchline is like.
Speaker 4: You know what they don't mean, like you know, if
Speaker 4: you get what he said? He gets some example like
Speaker 4: they don't mean like if you get you know, a
Speaker 4: disease there, it's you're not gonna have it when you
Speaker 4: get home. What that What that phrase means. What they're
Speaker 4: saying is that you can fuck up prostitute.
Speaker 1: And she's not gonna tell your.
Speaker 4: Wife, not like these jabberin prostitutes, these small town ors
Speaker 4: who are just blab.
Speaker 1: It all over you know, oh Diane. What Then he
Speaker 1: gets an example of like two women in like getting
Speaker 1: their hair.
Speaker 4: Done and she's like, I fucked your husband last week,
Speaker 4: and it's like that It's so funny because that is
Speaker 4: what that phrase is about it's about like these prostitutes
Speaker 4: won't tell what it's so funny, and it gave me
Speaker 4: so much hope because it seems like a subject matter
Speaker 4: that is just you could never find anything funny in
Speaker 4: that phrase because it's so well trodden and like so
Speaker 4: boring and like so could to say even like even
Speaker 4: making fun of the fact that it's is kind of
Speaker 4: cook because it's just overdone.
Speaker 2: And that just gave me.
Speaker 4: I love jokes like that that give me hope about
Speaker 4: really no subject as hacked.
Speaker 2: I used to have anxiety about that, like, isn't aren't
Speaker 2: we going to run out of stuff to joke about?
Speaker 2: Aren't there's so many comedians, so many specials. Isn't there
Speaker 2: going to be like we've covered all the topics now,
Speaker 2: but really it's it's infinite because you can everybody can
Speaker 2: have a different perspective on infinite topics and so it
Speaker 2: never runs out.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you could even there.
Speaker 4: I always think about if Norman Donald were still alive,
Speaker 4: all the jokes that would exist right now that don't
Speaker 4: because of him, all the uncovered, all the artifacts that
Speaker 4: are out there to be found, Like there is a
Speaker 4: world of hilarity that what and Greg Giraldo if he
Speaker 4: was around like all the Trump stuff, he would have
Speaker 4: toald like Joan Rivers, like, think of.
Speaker 2: All those jokes are George Carter.
Speaker 4: Those people were the only ones looking for them. They
Speaker 4: were the James Cameron for those Titanics. You know, they
Speaker 4: and no one else's can go down there without imploding.
Speaker 4: So if those just never gonna be seen.
Speaker 2: Would you?
Speaker 1: Dad would probably go down in that submarine, don't you think? No,
Speaker 1: he wouldn't. Actually, he's scared.
Speaker 5: Of depths and he's kind of I would have never
Speaker 5: done that. Yeah, you would do that, Chris.
Speaker 2: I'm a mom.
Speaker 1: Chris would do it.
Speaker 4: Now if they had an extra submarine made of the
Speaker 4: same things, he'd be like, it's a once in a lifetime.
Speaker 4: I'm like, yeah, that lifetime's over. He would do it.
Speaker 4: My boyfriend does not have the chip in his brain
Speaker 4: that says dangerous.
Speaker 1: And I'm worried you've got call.
Speaker 4: I'm made of first word it was, I just don't.
Speaker 4: It's so weird to love someone so much who you relate.
Speaker 4: As soon as I realized he wasn't born like almost
Speaker 4: like without born with like an arm where I'm.
Speaker 1: Like, how can you not pick that up with your
Speaker 1: right hand. He's like, I don't have an arm.
Speaker 4: So when I go, how could you ever want to
Speaker 4: climb Mount Everest when you know that one out of
Speaker 4: or K two, one out of six people die.
Speaker 1: And he's like, because I just does want to do
Speaker 1: He's not scared of death. Does he want to do that? Yes?
Speaker 1: He wants to do it all he wants.
Speaker 4: He'll go on any rollercoaster, He'll go on any bungeee thing,
Speaker 4: He'll go on any crazy expedition.
Speaker 1: I couldn't relate to this less.
Speaker 2: He told me that story about how he was in
Speaker 2: Abu Dhabi and he wrote those uh RVs or whatever
Speaker 2: and he flipped his over did you hear we were no?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sure he almost died enough.
Speaker 2: He was like, I flipped over my RV Eddy. Yeah.
Speaker 4: He had an Abu Jabbi and an Abu Dabby and
Speaker 4: he was there for like nine months and he could
Speaker 4: I know. Whenever we drive past four Runners, he's like,
Speaker 4: that looks fun. And I'm like, when I want to
Speaker 4: be single, I'll send you out on one of those.
Speaker 2: I can't wait.
Speaker 3: Yeah, just you gotta see that documentary with Chris Free solo.
Speaker 4: But that's what I'm gonna want to be. After he
Speaker 4: watches that and he's like, this looks cool.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go.
Speaker 4: You know what, I'm free and solo. Right now, we're
Speaker 4: done because I can't he ask.
Speaker 3: That guy's brain and he is missing. He's it has
Speaker 3: to bear center.
Speaker 4: There's no way that Chris could like, my I just
Speaker 4: realized there's something missing or I have something missing.
Speaker 2: Does he climb at all? Does he scramble on the rocks?
Speaker 4: No? But he would no he Oh, when we were
Speaker 4: in Tel Aviv, he was on these rocks, jumping around
Speaker 4: like and then it's there was a sign, thank God
Speaker 4: in English had said stay off the rocks, and I
Speaker 4: was like, you heed that sign because.
Speaker 1: He's a man of the law.
Speaker 4: But he given some rocks, he will he will start
Speaker 4: running all over them. He's got weak ankles. He knows
Speaker 4: that he's got to come with me on some scrambles.
Speaker 4: He would go with you on any of those things.
Speaker 4: And uh, yeah, he loves adventure.
Speaker 1: And what's a scramble?
Speaker 3: You can spelunk.
Speaker 2: Scrambling is like rock climbing without any equipment, where it's
Speaker 2: not you're not doing a sheer cliff. You're just like
Speaker 2: kind of having to go on your hands and knees
Speaker 2: to get up on rocks to climb a mountain, not
Speaker 2: a mountain, but like a pile of rocks bouldering.
Speaker 1: Is it the same as bender?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 4: While you guys do that, I'll riyah again and just
Speaker 4: get my get my profile ready, because yet he's gonna die.
Speaker 4: He's an older, he's aging his body. Isn't like, do
Speaker 4: not put him in these situations?
Speaker 2: Mom?
Speaker 1: You Matt Green?
Speaker 5: Are I know my brother in Lake give him goes
Speaker 5: on these things for fourteen ers where there's like fourteen
Speaker 5: of these mountains that are above this amount, you know, Brian,
Speaker 5: And he's done.
Speaker 1: Like eight of the fourteen's.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I say, did you get your life insurance meant
Speaker 5: before you leave?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Aren't that dangerous?
Speaker 1: Some of them are? We've seen. I've seen plenty of that.
Speaker 4: We've seen some like go pro footage from the top
Speaker 4: and they're all like, okay, yeah, single mother.
Speaker 1: Cut up, do not die? Every time he leaves.
Speaker 2: The fourteen er is just that he can't afford him.
Speaker 2: You can climb that's over fourteen thousand feet above sea
Speaker 2: levels and.
Speaker 1: Not lift these I cannot let my children.
Speaker 4: Mom have to die because she cannot.
Speaker 1: You can't.
Speaker 2: About him. Some times you don't have to climb it
Speaker 2: all when you're doing a fourteen or it's just a hike,
Speaker 2: a really strenuous uphill hike that goes up to fourteen
Speaker 2: thousand feet.
Speaker 5: Oh my god, No, it's it's hopping from this big.
Speaker 2: Crevass.
Speaker 1: Crevass and what's the other guard that's gold Jesus, no
Speaker 1: canyon sting uses. Yeah, it's in his song. Oh really,
Speaker 1: Fields of Barley.
Speaker 5: No, forget it, I'll get back. I'll be watching it
Speaker 5: next time you this word down anyway. Uh No, there's
Speaker 5: some big wide jumps.
Speaker 2: Oh right. It depends on what mountain, depends on what
Speaker 2: trail you take. Sometimes it doesn't have to be that dangerous,
Speaker 2: Like if you want to climb like Mount Whitney or something,
Speaker 2: you don't necessarily have to put yourself in danger.
Speaker 5: To do well.
Speaker 1: I believe you. But I bet whoever he's with his
Speaker 1: brothers doing all of them, Brian, so some of them.
Speaker 2: Some of them must be dangerous. If he's doing it's like.
Speaker 3: Julie, Well, let's picture Matt like jumping over a wide gulch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what about you get it. Do you get a
Speaker 1: little chasms? Okay, good job. Do you feel anything in
Speaker 1: your vagina when you imagine? Who said that?
Speaker 4: I almost said it, but I wanted to know I do,
Speaker 4: Like you know that sense you get when you are
Speaker 4: like up and like high or on something, or like
Speaker 4: if someone if you if you see something disgusting, Like
Speaker 4: do you get like a sense in your off when
Speaker 4: you get off high?
Speaker 2: When you get too high up?
Speaker 4: No? Are you you know sense like like if some
Speaker 4: if you see something like someone almost like slice their
Speaker 4: arm on something, or like you hear about a splinter,
Speaker 4: and like, do you get a little, like a little
Speaker 4: ting in China in your vagina?
Speaker 1: I haven't thought about that. I get it in like
Speaker 1: my stomach and my like more in my stomach.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I too.
Speaker 3: I always had it in my stomach and then five
Speaker 3: years ago it went three inches down and air. Okay,
Speaker 3: it's just like I'm going to pay attention, to pay attention,
Speaker 3: but I hate that I can't even think about something
Speaker 3: bad happening. My sister follows this Instagram account called like Something.
Speaker 3: You guys will know it. But it's like kids falling
Speaker 3: or something, and it's oh, kids bailing and she's like,
Speaker 3: this is.
Speaker 1: Hysterical to me.
Speaker 2: No, I can't watch it.
Speaker 4: It's like they don't get hurt, but they're always falling.
Speaker 4: Final thought, these videos where people say, so, did no
Speaker 4: one got hurt?
Speaker 2: Did you check check up on? Because this is bullshit.
Speaker 4: I see people break bones all the time that you
Speaker 4: cannot see, and I don't want to see.
Speaker 1: I hate people falling.
Speaker 2: Some videos they not get hurt or they did not die,
Speaker 2: because it's like, just because someone's not dead doesn't mean
Speaker 2: they're not grievously interested suffering.
Speaker 4: Even though I did watch the shark attack in Egypt
Speaker 4: without I found it unblurred, and I saw this guy.
Speaker 1: It looks like a scene in Jaws. I mean, it's insane.
Speaker 1: I recommend watching it.
Speaker 4: It's not too bad, but I recommend watching because if
Speaker 4: you have any interest. I'm someone who doesn't like Gore.
Speaker 4: I don't like really frightening things. I will not watch
Speaker 4: like Faces of Death. I've never seen any like really,
Speaker 4: you know, I don't watch scary movies. But this is
Speaker 4: so far away, and the girl filming it it's almost
Speaker 4: annoying because she just keeps going.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he definitely got killed. This not too long ago. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this was like a couple of weeks ago. Definitely like.
Speaker 2: Sharks, Well, you.
Speaker 1: Shouldn't be because this is so rare.
Speaker 3: It's the same as bees.
Speaker 4: No, honestly, well, there are going to be shark attack people.
Speaker 4: Sharks will kill people, but the odds of it are insane,
Speaker 4: and they don't really want to eat you. But this,
Speaker 4: this kid got and it's someone's I only watched it
Speaker 4: because I wanted to hear him scream dad, because that's.
Speaker 1: What that's I don't know why I wanted to hear it.
Speaker 1: But you can't hear it.
Speaker 2: You can't guess what.
Speaker 1: You gotta go, Papa. I'm just kidding. No, you couldn't
Speaker 1: hear it at all, Papa. Please, No, it was so bad.
Speaker 1: It's so sad. Recommend watching it. You were this guy too,
Speaker 1: just thrashing about you got a lot on your plate.
Speaker 4: No, I mean it looks like out of the movies,
Speaker 4: like if you watch Jaws, you know, like where they
Speaker 4: get hit and then they're just kind of like flailing
Speaker 4: around there and then he's crying. I'm sorry, I'll stop survivor. Yea, Honestly,
Speaker 4: this is the risk you take why I don't go
Speaker 4: with the ocean. This is why I don't.
Speaker 1: He's far out to I would never be far out
Speaker 1: of the fittest.
Speaker 4: Mean in this context, do not go out that you
Speaker 4: should have been doing more forty five classes.
Speaker 2: This kid was Egypt and it was a surfer.
Speaker 1: No, it was just a swimmer.
Speaker 4: He was way out, you know what I'm saying, Like
Speaker 4: not that the sharks can't get you inside.
Speaker 1: He's taking a chance going out that far.
Speaker 4: But sorry, I said to recommend watching it. I'm not
Speaker 4: celebrating this at all. It freaked me out.
Speaker 1: It made me so sad. I'm so fucking sad for
Speaker 1: this kid. He did not deserve that.
Speaker 2: Almost have to talk about it now to cleanse the
Speaker 2: trauma of seeing it.
Speaker 1: That double down.
Speaker 4: It wasn't that traumatic for me for whatever reason. I
Speaker 4: can watch that, but I could never watch the movie Midsummer,
Speaker 4: which I've read a description to that and it sounds horrific.
Speaker 2: Movie.
Speaker 1: Wait, you did It's that like scandinaving film?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I really liked it with Okay, so will you
Speaker 4: tell me? But I didn't know anyone who'd seen it. Okay,
Speaker 4: it's fucked up, right, Everyone who says. It says, it
Speaker 4: keeps getting You think it's gonna get better, like all
Speaker 4: the gore is done, and it keeps things keep getting worse.
Speaker 6: It's crazy, Yes, it gets worse. I actually saw that movie.
Speaker 6: It was like a midnight show in an empty theater.
Speaker 6: Avey and I went, it was so fun You guys
Speaker 6: are so the same, I know. And I thought it
Speaker 6: was like cinematically was like a really really great movie,
Speaker 6: especially when they're high, like they take mushrooms on this
Speaker 6: like campsite, and the way they present them that was awesome.
Speaker 6: It yes, yes, exactly, and I was completely sober. And
Speaker 6: there's this one part. Yeah, well there's this one part
Speaker 6: where there's like this orgy. Yeah, and this guy who
Speaker 6: is one of the captives, like these women fuck him.
Speaker 1: It's great.
Speaker 6: I don't know, I think it would really talking about
Speaker 6: like wait, like talk about fucking on camera like this.
Speaker 1: I've only seen I haven't seen the Idol. Have you
Speaker 1: guys seen the Idol yet?
Speaker 3: On HBO?
Speaker 1: No, I will watch it because of I don't the
Speaker 1: the stories around it.
Speaker 3: I saw like one little clip that maybe you sent me.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, I said you that it was so funny.
Speaker 1: It's like when the trainer is looking at the girl's
Speaker 1: body and he's like touching her too much in the weekend,
Speaker 1: who's the girl's boyfriend is like, get.
Speaker 4: Off my woman right now. I was like, but my
Speaker 4: parents are doctors, and he goes, if my friend was
Speaker 4: a gn of coologist, you think I could put my
Speaker 4: finger up any girl I wanted.
Speaker 2: It was just like soca.
Speaker 4: And then he's like and then he fires the trainer,
Speaker 4: and the trainer's like, I only take direction from my boss.
Speaker 1: And then the girl's like, I'm sorry, it's just not
Speaker 1: gonna work out.
Speaker 4: Like it's just so, it's so bad. Sorry, I can't
Speaker 4: watch Lily Rose depth. And then Chris was like, oh,
Speaker 4: I've been watching this It's so pornographic, and he starts
Speaker 4: pulling up all the sex scenes from it. It is
Speaker 4: is this list makes me so Yes, this makes me
Speaker 4: so mad. I'm leaning forward because I have a point
Speaker 4: to make. Everyone who's in the porn industry gets ostracized
Speaker 4: from Hollywood. They can't even dream of ever going to
Speaker 4: the Golden Globes or the Oscars or you know, rubbing
Speaker 4: elbows with the Hollywood elite because they've done porn and
Speaker 4: it's so offensive and it's so degrading, and it's so
Speaker 4: just like you're you're you're just lesser than if you've
Speaker 4: done porn. Yet, Lily Rose depth can be having exactly
Speaker 4: the same kind of sex that I watch in my
Speaker 4: bedroom when I go to X videos dot com or
Speaker 4: spank bank dot com or you know.
Speaker 2: Dot com.
Speaker 1: Okay, learned a new one, thank you, or you know,
Speaker 1: blackdraw dot com, and it's all it's the same. It
Speaker 1: is exactly cinematically the same.
Speaker 4: Yeah, maybe you don't see exact insertion and you don't
Speaker 4: see but there's nothing different about it. There's nothing different.
Speaker 4: Yet she will be lauded for this and be able
Speaker 4: to go to every red carpet, she'll get to go
Speaker 4: to the met Gala, and why is it? And you
Speaker 4: know why she should be able to and so should
Speaker 4: porn stars. It's a fucking art. You should not And Christmas, like,
Speaker 4: why would an actress ever do this? Like it's so egregious,
Speaker 4: Like he goes when you see these like actresses that
Speaker 4: are really like have a lot of credibility, why would
Speaker 4: they do these like lesbian porn scenes? And I go
Speaker 4: because I would in a second, because you know, what.
Speaker 4: There are a lot of us that would love to
Speaker 4: do porn. And I know my mom hates when I
Speaker 4: say this, but I think porn is an amazing art
Speaker 4: and it can be done very well, and I would
Speaker 4: like to do it. But I could never do it
Speaker 4: because it would I would be ostracized. But if I've
Speaker 4: ever got asked to do a movie where I have
Speaker 4: to have a lesbian scene because that's the director's vision,
Speaker 4: I would be like.
Speaker 1: Hell, yes, sign me up. I've always wanted to do this,
Speaker 1: so we should not.
Speaker 4: The lines between porn and cinema are indistinguishable now based
Speaker 4: on what I've seen from the IDOL.
Speaker 1: It's not fair if we are scorning porn stars for
Speaker 1: what they do and.
Speaker 4: Making them kill themselves because they can't get a fucking
Speaker 4: job after the age out of porn because they've done
Speaker 4: porn before.
Speaker 1: And they can't go DJ.
Speaker 4: In Dayton, Ohio, at a Bert Kreiser show which happened
Speaker 4: to Carter Cruz, who was a porractress and is now
Speaker 4: retired and she's a DJ, they googled his lineup last summer,
Speaker 4: saw that Carter Cruz was on it, saw that she
Speaker 4: had done porn before, and because of the endowment of
Speaker 4: this stupid center in Dayton, this theater that they were performing,
Speaker 4: she was not allowed to perform because before no, it
Speaker 4: wasn't Burt saying no, but it was the endowment for it. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I mean Bert brought her on tour and as a DJ.
Speaker 4: She has nothing to do with porn anymore. But this
Speaker 4: is what I'm saying. If we are allowing a Lily
Speaker 4: Rose Depp to be on the Kelly Clarkson Show, then
Speaker 4: we should let Sasha Gray be on the Kelly Clarkson
Speaker 4: Show like it should be.
Speaker 1: Does this make sense? Like why do we go that's
Speaker 1: art and then porn is not art?
Speaker 4: Fuck this show. I fucking hate the Idol. I think
Speaker 4: the Weekend is a bad person. I think that this
Speaker 4: show is exploitative. I think that I don't need to
Speaker 4: see Lily Rose Dep's tits this much as much as
Speaker 4: I'm like, go girl, do it, and I would probably
Speaker 4: do it too. I think it's gratuitous. I think it's
Speaker 4: like a man like kind of put her up to it.
Speaker 4: And I would love to say no, she chose to
Speaker 4: do this, but I don't think she wrote it, and
Speaker 4: I don't think a woman wrote this but I didn't
Speaker 4: really check.
Speaker 1: It just feels she did to me.
Speaker 4: And I don't want to see a girl who looks
Speaker 4: like a as she has a childbody being fucked.
Speaker 1: How about that this girl looks like she's twelve years old.
Speaker 1: She looks like she's twelve, and they fucking.
Speaker 2: Know that she does.
Speaker 1: And that's why they cast her.
Speaker 4: Because people want to see children have sex because everyone's gross.
Speaker 6: That's what's final rank in the day. Is it the
Speaker 6: same director as you four?
Speaker 1: Yeah, because he likes to see young girls. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: penetrate that. That was my issue with Euphoria.
Speaker 6: At first, I really really liked it, and then I
Speaker 6: was like, oh, these scenes are really egregious, like and
Speaker 6: kind of like giving me a vibe that a man
Speaker 6: has written this. I thought it was written by women
Speaker 6: and then and then I found that out. And that's
Speaker 6: my issue with the idol is that it just like
Speaker 6: exploits women.
Speaker 4: It's a girl who looks prepubescent, and I know that
Speaker 4: they casted it for that reason. She does not have
Speaker 4: there's no no offense to her body. She has a
Speaker 4: beautiful body, but they chose her. I believe she's a
Speaker 4: great actress too. When you're watching it, you feel like
Speaker 4: you're watching see me. She's very not wafy and they
Speaker 4: know what they're doing.
Speaker 2: Yes, Daisy Jones and the Six versus the Idol? Which one?
Speaker 2: Would you rather watch? The Idol?
Speaker 4: Because it's because at least it knows what it is,
Speaker 4: I think more than Daisy Jones and the Six, who
Speaker 4: is trying to be something it's not. But like, this
Speaker 4: is no shade to Lily Rose dep I believe she
Speaker 4: said she had a good time on the film, and
Speaker 4: I'm sure she didn't have a gun to her head,
Speaker 4: and like her whole life and career were threatened for
Speaker 4: her to put out that statement because of the rumors
Speaker 4: swelling around this. But I do believe that when you're
Speaker 4: an actress auditioning for a thing and you finally get
Speaker 4: this role, you've been up in front of these men
Speaker 4: countless times just there. Your life is in their hands
Speaker 4: to give you this role. They have this in the hour,
Speaker 4: and then you finally get the role. Are you going
Speaker 4: to suddenly be able to speak up to that guy
Speaker 4: and tell him I don't want to do this. This
Speaker 4: guy that has already established such a control over whether
Speaker 4: you get this or not, not only him but the
Speaker 4: studio heads that had to sign off on you. The
Speaker 4: reason you're there is because a bunch of men chose you.
Speaker 4: So at what point do you think an actress is
Speaker 4: going to have the autonomy at that age, at her
Speaker 4: first starring role in something to be like. I'm a
Speaker 4: little uncomfortable about this, and I don't think I just
Speaker 4: maybe she's stronger than I think she is. I just
Speaker 4: know that in that position, even at my age, if
Speaker 4: I got a role in something, I would do anything
Speaker 4: the director fucking said because they gave me that role.
Speaker 4: And that's why I think that maybe casting should happen
Speaker 4: outside of a director. I don't know, maybe I'm shedding
Speaker 4: new guidelines that I need to talk to sag After about.
Speaker 4: But because of that relationship that you established with the director,
Speaker 4: when you audition in front of him, you're giving him
Speaker 4: that power before he even has cast you, and therefore
Speaker 4: you you'll do anything.
Speaker 1: I'm that good point. Thank you, really, it really is.
Speaker 1: I mean I would never think it's you. You're just like,
Speaker 1: thank you for having me.
Speaker 4: Even when as the producer of a reality show, I
Speaker 4: empowered the girls that we've chose to say, you are
Speaker 4: in the position of power. You cannot be replaced. We've
Speaker 4: already shot three episodes with you. We can't reshoot that.
Speaker 4: If you want to walk off set because you don't
Speaker 4: like something that's going on, you fucking put your foot
Speaker 4: down because you're in the driver's seat.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 4: We were before when we cast you, but now you
Speaker 4: have the power. We're replaceable, you're not. And that's what
Speaker 4: I think these actresses need to be empowered to do.
Speaker 4: But I doubt that they feel that way. And and
Speaker 4: you know, it's it's complicated. But yeah, maybe people who
Speaker 4: have watched the Idol can enlighten me. Maybe I need
Speaker 4: to watch more of it and I'll like totally change
Speaker 4: my tune.
Speaker 2: But I just don't.
Speaker 1: I like the Weekends music, but I don't like I
Speaker 1: don't like his little demeanor.
Speaker 2: I don't like it. And I just a halftime show.
Speaker 2: I hated the super Bowl halftime show really, with all
Speaker 2: the mirrors. It was too much effects and not enough music.
Speaker 2: It was just like I felt like he was trying
Speaker 2: to hypnotize me. Oh a magic trick.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't mind his music, and maybe I can
Speaker 4: separate what a bad person he is from his music,
Speaker 4: Like with some people, I can do that. Like, I
Speaker 4: don't care about Michael Jackson. I can still enjoy even
Speaker 4: though I know he's licked little boys assholes.
Speaker 2: It doesn't These are facts.
Speaker 1: Again, I'm just Tom broke off you guys. I'm reporting
Speaker 1: the facts.
Speaker 2: This is what he did.
Speaker 1: Really fact.
Speaker 4: Did you not watch the Finding or yes? Yes, I'm
Speaker 4: sorry to get so into it brain. Yeah, well go
Speaker 4: watch that shark attack.
Speaker 2: Put it back.
Speaker 1: Sorry, this episode fucking sucks. Also, a little child yelled
Speaker 1: while Michael was doing that.
Speaker 4: No, I had to do it.
Speaker 3: You know what?
Speaker 4: Fuck it because you know what, every other podcast is
Speaker 4: going to these places, all these friends and Tim Dillon,
Speaker 4: they all get to like work in whatever they want,
Speaker 4: Tom Sigura, but for some reason we don't. We're going there, folks.
Speaker 2: And why you're not. We're apologizing for it. That's why
Speaker 2: we can't apologize for it.
Speaker 4: We can't have this is fucked up and make a
Speaker 4: new bingo card.
Speaker 1: Picky Pod means because we're going off the rail. This
Speaker 1: is no more like just inner empowerment bullshit talk. We
Speaker 1: are making fun of grim disasters and trauma. Okay, anyway,
Speaker 1: I hope you guys have a great week. Well, I
Speaker 1: think we have a show tomorrow.
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is We're taping this a week in advance,
Speaker 4: so I'm kind of all over the place on the schedule.
Speaker 4: But we'll see you tomorrow on the show. Mom, thank
Speaker 4: you for being here, and have a good day, and
Speaker 4: jump be Ca and just fuck it, say what do
Speaker 4: you want?
Speaker 1: Yeah, and just Apollo days later, and please don't cancel me,
Speaker 1: but also do because I'm tired.