WEBVTT - Peter Cowley on Valuing Life

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<v Speaker 1>The Investor. Peter Cowley has a third book out, The

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<v Speaker 1>Cambridge Entrepreneur and Angel Investor. Is the author of the

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<v Speaker 1>startup bestseller The Handbook Really the Invested Investor. Now he's

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<v Speaker 1>focused not on business but on his personal story, public success,

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<v Speaker 1>private Grief. It charts Peter's struggles through alcoholism, the loss

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<v Speaker 1>of two sons to suicide, and now a terminal cancer

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<v Speaker 1>diagnosis in his final book, one in which he puts

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<v Speaker 1>his business career into perspective. I went to Cambridge to

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<v Speaker 1>meet Peter Cowley for a conversation about his life, the

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<v Speaker 1>VC business and loss. I started by asking him what

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<v Speaker 1>first drew him into.

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<v Speaker 2>His career with the people. I didn't really realize that

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<v Speaker 2>to start with, but once I got involved and started

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<v Speaker 2>to have entrepreneurs were generally about half a generation to

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<v Speaker 2>a generation younger than me. So and nowadays the generation

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<v Speaker 2>to generation and a half. The people's spending time with

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<v Speaker 2>those people the ones a good entrepreneur will listen because

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<v Speaker 2>they have to listen to the market. They have to

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<v Speaker 2>listen to customers, they have to listen to regulators, and

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<v Speaker 2>sometimes they do a listen to investors as well, and

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<v Speaker 2>they certain need to listen to staff. So they are

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<v Speaker 2>passionate and they are willing to learn. So I found

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<v Speaker 2>that spending time with these people was very invigorating and

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<v Speaker 2>of course taught me a lot about things about technology,

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<v Speaker 2>about market and so I just got pulled into this

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<v Speaker 2>spending time with interesting people.

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<v Speaker 1>You've written this new book, which is much more personal.

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<v Speaker 1>Tell us about why you wrote the book, and obviously

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<v Speaker 1>that you've been struck by some of the worst things

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<v Speaker 1>that happen to people.

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<v Speaker 2>Of course, as many people said, seem to have been

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<v Speaker 2>unlucky compared with most people. So the book is called

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<v Speaker 2>public Success, Private Grief. The public success we've just talked about.

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<v Speaker 2>The private grief is now not so private. So I

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<v Speaker 2>lost my brother to cancer when he was twenty one.

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<v Speaker 2>I lost my sister to alcoholism when she was fifty one.

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<v Speaker 2>I lost my first wife, the mother and my children.

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<v Speaker 2>She died of DBT when she was fifty one or

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<v Speaker 2>fifty two. I suffer FM alcoholism, though I've not had

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<v Speaker 2>a drink for nearly twenty four years. Sometime next month,

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<v Speaker 2>I've got late stage cancer. That's what really triggered writing

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<v Speaker 2>the book. I'll tell him about that at the moment.

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<v Speaker 2>But the two things that were really are so painful

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<v Speaker 2>even to talk about, well, to talk about what I

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<v Speaker 2>am doing, of course, is the loss of two children.

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<v Speaker 2>So I had three boys who were two years apart,

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<v Speaker 2>and my middle son died when he was twenty three,

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<v Speaker 2>and my youngest son died who helped her with a

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<v Speaker 2>book project, died when he was thirty four, a couple

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<v Speaker 2>of years ago. Anyway, it is exactly if you've got

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<v Speaker 2>any children, anybody who's listeners has got children, don't go there,

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<v Speaker 2>don't think about it. And then I was diagnosed with

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<v Speaker 2>late stage four non smoking lung cancer. So one in

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<v Speaker 2>five lung cancer sufferers haven't smoked, and unfortunately we're the

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<v Speaker 2>people who don't. Is not detected still quite late, so

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<v Speaker 2>it was all over my body, my brain, well, lots

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<v Speaker 2>of places in the body when he was detected. So

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<v Speaker 2>that happened at the end of twenty one. And then

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<v Speaker 2>Alan died at the end of twenty two. And because

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<v Speaker 2>I've written stuff before, and I'm sure I've helped a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of people, lots of entrepreneurs, a lot of people

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<v Speaker 2>in the charity sector over the time, I just felt

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<v Speaker 2>there was another book in me basically, but not a

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<v Speaker 2>book in the sense of the other two, which are

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<v Speaker 2>business books. A book that is personal, very personal and inspirational.

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<v Speaker 2>Because I don't know, I come from Yorkshire. I've always

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<v Speaker 2>been very direct, almost two direct. I'm sure I've just

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<v Speaker 2>decided to open it all. So I've written a book

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<v Speaker 2>which is basically a memoir.

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<v Speaker 1>What do you hope the messages? Who do you hope

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<v Speaker 1>is going to read the book? And also what do

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<v Speaker 1>you think that people are going to learn from it?

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<v Speaker 1>Because I think the title of the book sort of

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<v Speaker 1>expresses it, you know, very very well. And I think

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<v Speaker 1>that that people listening maybe who are facing these sorts

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<v Speaker 1>of struggles, whatever they may be, what are they going

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<v Speaker 1>to be able to take in terms of inspiration or

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<v Speaker 1>just kind of the will to go on.

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<v Speaker 2>It's just inspiration for getting on with life, not sweating

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<v Speaker 2>the small stuff, as the Americans say, you know, you're asking,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, doing the stuff that might not be might

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<v Speaker 2>not be around tomorrow, to achieve.

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<v Speaker 1>Is it the to do list? I mean, it seems

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<v Speaker 1>so terribly vc to say I'm going to make a

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<v Speaker 1>business plan and I'm going to make the best of

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<v Speaker 1>this awful situation. Is that just the bottom line that's.

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<v Speaker 2>One of it? And I have both what I call

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<v Speaker 2>my bucket list, which we've all heard of, and I

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<v Speaker 2>also have a list and you can.

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<v Speaker 1>Probably imagine might not be able to put that on radio.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, I also have an effort list. Yes, so this,

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<v Speaker 2>of course it seems that I don't know what to

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<v Speaker 2>do any longer. There are things that I would have

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<v Speaker 2>done before that you know.

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<v Speaker 1>I go on a few of those.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, even things like speaking at events, like mentoring people,

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<v Speaker 2>like talking to entrepreneurs. There's a lot of things I

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<v Speaker 2>just think, No.

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<v Speaker 1>You don't want to do it anymore.

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<v Speaker 2>I've got why not, Well, it's because I haven't got

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<v Speaker 2>that long left. Because unfortunately, because it's stage four, I

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<v Speaker 2>do know that from the research that it's unlikely that

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<v Speaker 2>I live past much past the end of this year.

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<v Speaker 2>Now this is statistical, of course, but you know the

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<v Speaker 2>statistical mean half is already before that date and half afterwards,

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<v Speaker 2>and so something could happen even during twenty twenty four.

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<v Speaker 2>So yeah, getting on with things. I mean, there's a

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<v Speaker 2>number of lessons in the book. It isn't just that

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<v Speaker 2>there's a number of business lessons. Even in the book.

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<v Speaker 2>It's not a self help which we did think about doing.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a memoir which has got a description in there

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<v Speaker 2>so that people can read and hopefully work out from

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<v Speaker 2>their own circumstances, which might have to do with something

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<v Speaker 2>else and maybe just business failure. They can maybe even

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<v Speaker 2>from that and the process of the business failing, learn

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<v Speaker 2>how to cope with their own character and not disappear

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<v Speaker 2>into a well of grief.

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<v Speaker 1>I also as a parent myself, it is the horrifying

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<v Speaker 1>bit of losing children is so awful. How you how

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<v Speaker 1>you dealt personally with that in the aftermath.

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<v Speaker 2>We couldn't have had this conversation within three months of

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<v Speaker 2>his death. I just wouldn't have been able to talk

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<v Speaker 2>about it without ending up in not being able to speak.

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<v Speaker 2>In fact, obviously I grieve and miss both sons tremendously.

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<v Speaker 2>But life I need to get on with my life,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I need to. It bubbles up. Sometimes. It

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<v Speaker 2>hasn't bubbled up during this interview, but he could easily

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<v Speaker 2>have done and whether And part of it, of course,

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<v Speaker 2>is not so much the busyness, but giving back, and

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<v Speaker 2>this book is about that. It's about trying to help

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<v Speaker 2>other people. I haven't really answered your question, but it's

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<v Speaker 2>that's because I don't really know in the end, but

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just not sure how I've coped. You know, there

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<v Speaker 2>isn't a magic one to coping with tragedies. And I

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<v Speaker 2>don't think it's because I'm a cold creature that just

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<v Speaker 2>buries it or ignores it, or my skin shells so sick.

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<v Speaker 2>I think I really have sort of been lucky. I

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<v Speaker 2>had the right assistance at the right time, and I

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<v Speaker 2>had something to redirect my grief and my addiction into,

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<v Speaker 2>which has been positive benefit.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, a lot of our audience they're very young, and

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<v Speaker 1>they're in the city, and they're in financial services, and

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<v Speaker 1>it's all about making money, and I just I don't know.

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<v Speaker 1>I think you've had experience in that world of trying

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<v Speaker 1>to make it, you know that kind of really the

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<v Speaker 1>drive of trying to build your own business, trying to

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<v Speaker 1>do well. It's not exactly the same, I think as

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<v Speaker 1>being in financial services in the city kind of being

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<v Speaker 1>in VC. But I suppose what would you say to

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<v Speaker 1>those people about the point of it of the money making.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, money isn't the bial. We all know that. I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>even that your listeners will know that. In principle. It

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<v Speaker 2>would be really great if they are in the city,

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<v Speaker 2>and they staying there, they get to the point at

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<v Speaker 2>say the age of thirty five, they back out and

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<v Speaker 2>then they use that money and the time for something else,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, going to teaching, help charities with time as

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<v Speaker 2>well as money, etc. I've been obviously, I had customers

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<v Speaker 2>in the city, so I've spent time with people in

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<v Speaker 2>the city. And it is pretty frantic lifestyle. This isn't

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<v Speaker 2>a rehearsal. Life is not rehearsal. We all know that

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<v Speaker 2>that's very hackney, isn't it. Enjoy life in some way

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<v Speaker 2>get the balance right between personal life and work life.

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<v Speaker 2>And I definitely got it wrong.