Speaker 1: Brought to you by the reinvented two thousand twelve camera.
Speaker 1: It's ready. Are you welcome to stuff you should know
Speaker 1: from house Stuff Works dot com. Hey, and welcome to
Speaker 1: the podcast. I'm Josh Clark. There's Charles W Chuck Bryant.
Speaker 1: We've been drinking coffee. I am actually Josh. I told
Speaker 1: you what did I tell you ten minutes ago that
Speaker 1: you are drinking coffee? And you showed me even that
Speaker 1: you are, so I believe. And it's my first cup
Speaker 1: since when, like last February or so, which is weird, man,
Speaker 1: because you were on talking for a while. You talked
Speaker 1: really fast. You're like, I feel weird and it was
Speaker 1: fun to watch, and then I guess I hadn't noticed.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I just stopped. Why. Uh, I'm just not
Speaker 1: you know, I'm not a regular coffee drinker. I drink
Speaker 1: it when I'm in the mood or when it's cold.
Speaker 1: But a year in between cups is beyond not a
Speaker 1: regular coffell. It hasn't been cold. It's like avoidance. I
Speaker 1: just maybe it's been I've had some since in Yeah.
Speaker 1: Actually I had one of those gingerbread lat taste yesterday.
Speaker 1: Those are good they're real good. Eggnog's good too. It's
Speaker 1: almost like not coffee though to me, because you and
Speaker 1: I drink it black dessert treat generally, which I'm not
Speaker 1: you know, I'm not saying that's the way you should
Speaker 1: drink it. But I just really enjoyed the taste of
Speaker 1: black coffee about eight times a year. I'm with you.
Speaker 1: I've cut my intake down tremendously since then, since last February,
Speaker 1: down to a dozen cups a day, down to like
Speaker 1: a third of that, No, a quarter of that, three
Speaker 1: three or four cups three about three. It's not bad.
Speaker 1: And it's all decaf too, It's almost all decaf, but
Speaker 1: I still get wired buzz. It's weird. Yeah. What do
Speaker 1: they call that? The old psychosomatic reactions? Junkie? Yeah? So, Chuck, Yes,
Speaker 1: you asked me a question. I was like, this is
Speaker 1: the absolute truth, deory listener Um. Chuck asked me a question, uh,
Speaker 1: because I said I didn't have any any intro to this,
Speaker 1: and he said, well, would you know the origin a
Speaker 1: cup of Joe? And I said, yes, I do, so
Speaker 1: here's the intro. Spotan eighty back during World War two, right, Uh,
Speaker 1: the US worked closely with the British, and the British
Speaker 1: already had um something called a cuppa c U p
Speaker 1: p A. Hey to our British friends over there, you
Speaker 1: guys can go to sleep for a minute because you
Speaker 1: know this. But a cuppa is just a cup of tea.
Speaker 1: But t is so ubiquitous. That's just saying c U
Speaker 1: p p a means a cup of tea. A couple
Speaker 1: you're gonna have a cuppa. That means d having some
Speaker 1: tea exactly. But coffee is so thoroughly ingrained in the
Speaker 1: American culture, I believe, Chuck, there's a statue you furnished
Speaker 1: me with that eight percent of Americans consumed coffee. And
Speaker 1: it's been this way for a long time, right, And
Speaker 1: that's consumed not necessarily regularly, but consume, consume, take in
Speaker 1: like I'm part of. This is already well established by
Speaker 1: World War Two. So when American g i's were hanging
Speaker 1: out with British soldiers, um, they drank coffee like all
Speaker 1: the time. It was part of the rations drag coffee.
Speaker 1: There's even matches included not just to let your cigarettes,
Speaker 1: but to light a fire for a kettle if you
Speaker 1: needed to coffee is just as ubiquitous among American servicemen
Speaker 1: as T was with um G I s Well, American
Speaker 1: serviceman slang is g I joe. You put Kappa and
Speaker 1: before joe, and you have a cup of joe. And
Speaker 1: that that is why coffee is called joe. Yeah, all right,
Speaker 1: that mystery soft. It was a good intro, Chuck, well done.
Speaker 1: It was teamwork. So this is I'm pretty excited about
Speaker 1: this one. Actually, it was a good article. It was
Speaker 1: a really good artic written by the esteemed and uh
Speaker 1: unknown Deborah Beller. Have you heard of Debora Beller? Never
Speaker 1: must be a freelancer. All right, So let's get to
Speaker 1: the history first, because that's what we like to do
Speaker 1: here on the podcast program. Uh there's an ancient um
Speaker 1: not ancient, but it's a legend. It's perhaps a myth.
Speaker 1: No one knows for sure about Calde the Ethiopian goat herder.
Speaker 1: Well he has a name, so you know it's for real.
Speaker 1: And supposedly what happened is he saw his goats mowing
Speaker 1: down on these weird green uh fruits. I'm sorry, red
Speaker 1: at first cheeze already miss set up and he noticed
Speaker 1: they were you know, they called him dancing goats. They
Speaker 1: started to get a little frisky and not sleep at
Speaker 1: night like they're supposed to, and he said, oh, what
Speaker 1: is this stuff? I gotta get ahold of this. There's
Speaker 1: two versions from here. He took it to a local
Speaker 1: monastery and either the abbot there made a drink from
Speaker 1: it that kept him and the rest of his monk's awake,
Speaker 1: so they said this is awesome, or he said no,
Speaker 1: this is bad, and he threw it in the fire,
Speaker 1: which produced that nice aroma, and then he said, hey,
Speaker 1: maybe it's not so bad. So either way, it's probably legend,
Speaker 1: but it's a nice story. Yeah, and there's a there's
Speaker 1: a coffee company here in Atlanta, don't know where they're based. Originally,
Speaker 1: if it could be, Atlantic, called dancing goats. And that
Speaker 1: is why I never thought about that. There's a lot
Speaker 1: of Caldy coffees around the country. Oh yeah, I never
Speaker 1: thought that. Yeah, well, okay, yeah, dancing goats. They're like
Speaker 1: they're crazy for the coffee. Have you ever seen a
Speaker 1: goat dance? I have not. I used to dance with
Speaker 1: my goat. I've seen a painting goat, but not a
Speaker 1: dancing goat. So so that's the legend history, right. Um.
Speaker 1: We know that ancient African tribes my ancient I mean
Speaker 1: like prehistoric meaning pre writing, how about that? Okay, especially
Speaker 1: along the eastern coast of Africa. UM had this Basically
Speaker 1: they made little power bars. They would take um animal
Speaker 1: fat and then they would take the coffee berries and
Speaker 1: either smush them and then put them in animal fat
Speaker 1: or else they just put the whole coffee bears and
Speaker 1: animal fat and then eat them and then they would
Speaker 1: like they would have a lot more energy after that.
Speaker 1: Pretty cool, right, this uh originated probably in Ethiopia, Ethiopias
Speaker 1: biggest naturally there. Yes, a certain type does um uh.
Speaker 1: Years later that so we leave Africa. Now Africa they're
Speaker 1: eating their power bars. Um. We go to the Arabian Peninsula,
Speaker 1: and the same kind of coffee grows there on the
Speaker 1: Arabian Peninsula as does as thrives well in the Ethiopian highlands.
Speaker 1: Should we go ahead and call it what it is Arabica, okay?
Speaker 1: And that is like the primo coffee as far as
Speaker 1: coffee drinkers are concerned. The wine of Araby right. Um,
Speaker 1: On the Arabian Peninsula, somewhere around a thousand a d.
Speaker 1: Somebody figured out that you could roast the stuff and
Speaker 1: make it into a concoction of brew if you will,
Speaker 1: and start drinking it hot drink bye. I think the
Speaker 1: thirteenth century, a couple hundred years later, Um, the Muslims
Speaker 1: which had conquered Um the Arabian Peninsula by then, UM
Speaker 1: knew that they had something really special with the coffee.
Speaker 1: So they would export coffee beans, but you would be
Speaker 1: beheaded if you tried to get a plant or a
Speaker 1: seed out right. They want to keep it, yeah, because
Speaker 1: they knew, like, we can basically control the world with this. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And I found that that there's something called the kabe Kane,
Speaker 1: which was the public coffee houses in the Arabian Peninsula,
Speaker 1: and they were hugely popular still are I'm sure? And
Speaker 1: they it's at that time, and this is what do
Speaker 1: you say, one thousand d. Well, they they had a
Speaker 1: lockdown on coffee by the thirteenth century. Okay, long time
Speaker 1: ago though, but early on coffee already started to have
Speaker 1: a link between drinking this stuff and sitting around with
Speaker 1: people and talking about smart things. It wasn't like going
Speaker 1: to a bar where you get slashed and talk about
Speaker 1: you know, the good old days, you know, and end
Speaker 1: up weeping exactly. Uh. So they called these kab Kane's
Speaker 1: uh Schools of the Wise, and then later in England
Speaker 1: there were more than three hundred of these in London
Speaker 1: by the sixteen hundreds, and they were called penny universities
Speaker 1: because a cup of coffee was a penny and you
Speaker 1: would sit around and like learn stuff in the US
Speaker 1: now in London, okay, nice, So there was always a link.
Speaker 1: I just found it interesting from the very beginning, between
Speaker 1: drinking coffee and talking smarts like we're doing right, go ahead,
Speaker 1: check okay, No, that's all I had, okay. Um. So
Speaker 1: we we were saying that the Muslims had a lockdown
Speaker 1: on coffee. But there was supposedly a legend. There's a
Speaker 1: couple of legends, legends of people getting it out of
Speaker 1: the Arab Peninsula and into the rest of the world. Um,
Speaker 1: And one of them is an Indian smuggler named Baba
Speaker 1: Boudon Baba Booi Baba boud Okay, and he left Mecca.
Speaker 1: Supposedly there was some seed strap to his chest and
Speaker 1: made it out and um started growing coffee in India right. Well,
Speaker 1: the fact that it was Mecca was it may not
Speaker 1: have spread the same because Mecca was obviously a destination
Speaker 1: still is for pilgrimages, so it may it may not
Speaker 1: have picked up if it hadn't have been for the
Speaker 1: fact that it was in Mecca, right. Um, I supposedly,
Speaker 1: I don't know how it got out to Europe, but
Speaker 1: the first um first coffee plantation, first European controlled coffee plantation,
Speaker 1: was established in Java by the Dutch in sixteen sixteen UM.
Speaker 1: And then it made its way across the Atlantic, and
Speaker 1: you can kind of see like little by little, there's
Speaker 1: like histories and legends about how coffee spread, which is
Speaker 1: pretty cool. Um. So it made its way into India
Speaker 1: thanks to Baba Bouddhan. It made its way to um
Speaker 1: Brazil thanks to a spy named Lieutenant Colonel Paletta, who
Speaker 1: was sent by the Emperor of Brazil at the time
Speaker 1: in seventeen seven to get coffee from Yeah, from French Guiana,
Speaker 1: go find the ambassador's wife or the the the Emperor
Speaker 1: of of French Guiana. The ambassador, go find his wife
Speaker 1: and seduce her and get some coffee sack seedlings. And
Speaker 1: he did. Yeah, apparently he was a looker, and she
Speaker 1: was a sucker for a handsome mug. And so when
Speaker 1: he left, she gave him a bouquet of flowers and
Speaker 1: he hid them inside the flowers. So there you have it,
Speaker 1: and coffee is president BRAZILA. Now Brazil's like the world's
Speaker 1: leading grower. I believe of coffee. That true. I think
Speaker 1: in Brazil alone, Um, there are five million people who
Speaker 1: are employed to cultivate and harvest three billion coffee plants.
Speaker 1: That's just in Brazil alone. Wow, so you mentioned Europe.
Speaker 1: Though coffee in Europe it would have not taken hold
Speaker 1: in Europe nearly as aggressively if it hadn't have been
Speaker 1: for Pope Clement the Eighth. Did you hear about this guy?
Speaker 1: It was Originally coffee was very controversial obviously, uh, early
Speaker 1: on because it's a drug, gonna stimulant, and a lot
Speaker 1: of Europeans cautioned against the bitter invention of satan. They
Speaker 1: took it to Pope Clement and said, hey, dude, you
Speaker 1: gotta rule on this evil stuff. And he went, well,
Speaker 1: let me give it a try first. He gave notice
Speaker 1: everyone has a Brooklyn accent now, and um, he gave
Speaker 1: it a try and said Wow, this stuff is pretty awesome. Actually,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give it the stamp of approval. So Pope
Speaker 1: Clement gave it the papal stamp, and that's why it
Speaker 1: became so popular in Europe. Well, yeah, it was vindicated papally,
Speaker 1: and if it hadn't have been, who knows. So okay,
Speaker 1: well we'll talk about Europe for a second. You were
Speaker 1: talking about how um the penny academies, penny universities, penny universities.
Speaker 1: So um. There's also been a lot of companies that
Speaker 1: are still around today. A lot of just to set
Speaker 1: a lot of huge events have taken place or begun
Speaker 1: or find the roots in coffee houses. Lloyd's of London,
Speaker 1: rue Lloyds of London, UM, the huge insurance company, I
Speaker 1: think the world's largest insure began in a coffee house
Speaker 1: that was owned by a guy named Edward Lloyd, and
Speaker 1: I guess to make a little electra money on the
Speaker 1: side or to keep his patrons happy, he kept a
Speaker 1: list of all the ships that were insured by some
Speaker 1: of his UM patrons, who I guess at the time
Speaker 1: you could get somebody to cover your ship as an investment,
Speaker 1: and Edward Lloyd started keeping track of it, hence Lloyd's
Speaker 1: of London. And now you have your tonsils insured because
Speaker 1: of that very day. Man. That costs me, but it's
Speaker 1: going to be worth than just in case. Um. Also,
Speaker 1: do you remember how I said that coffee is just
Speaker 1: so ingrained in American culture? Do you know why? The
Speaker 1: answer is totally obvious, but so obvious. Yes, it's so obviously.
Speaker 1: You just walk right past it and you don't hear
Speaker 1: a lot of I'm not pressed, but you just don't
Speaker 1: read about that a lot unless And it wasn't just
Speaker 1: the Boston Tea Party that did it. It was, I mean,
Speaker 1: that was part of it, but it was all of
Speaker 1: the taxes on tea that really made it prohibitive for
Speaker 1: people to drink, so they started switching to coffee. And
Speaker 1: then it became something of a point of national pride,
Speaker 1: and and the Boston Tea Party itself was planned in
Speaker 1: a coffee house called the Green Dragon. That is very true.
Speaker 1: So coffee is very much, um, just from the from
Speaker 1: the get go, from the it's the reason why everybody
Speaker 1: is sub jacked up for the American Revolution. Well, it's
Speaker 1: just it's interesting all these stories come together to make
Speaker 1: coffee like the fact that it was in Mecca, the
Speaker 1: fact that the Pope gave it the stamp of approval,
Speaker 1: the Boston tea party, the ties with smart talk in
Speaker 1: coffee houses. It's all those things came together to form
Speaker 1: the perfect storm of what is now the second leading
Speaker 1: h import or export or just commodity. Aside from second
Speaker 1: leading commodity, as far as I understand, it's far. It
Speaker 1: ranks second to petroleum in terms of dollars traded world crazy,
Speaker 1: and it's the most popular drink on the planet aside
Speaker 1: from water. And I imagine that's on the the no
Speaker 1: normal market. I don't know if anything tops coffee on
Speaker 1: the black market. Um, chuck, it's I think. You know.
Speaker 1: There's plenty of reasons to love coffee, but probably the
Speaker 1: most the most common reason to love coffee is um.
Speaker 1: The trimethyl accident. Then yes, yes, C eight H ten
Speaker 1: and four O two for those in the know. Uh,
Speaker 1: that's caffeine UM, which has the same but a milder
Speaker 1: effect on the brain is cocaine or opium meth I'm
Speaker 1: starting to feel this already. I felt the first one
Speaker 1: this morning. Yeah, um, And caffeine occurs naturally in a
Speaker 1: number of plants. It's not just coffee, um, but it's
Speaker 1: in like whamo amounts in coffee. Um. An average cup
Speaker 1: of coffee has about a hundred milligrams of caffeine, where
Speaker 1: if you have like a can of coke, twelve ounce
Speaker 1: can of coke is fifty milligrams of caffeine. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: I mean it's twice as much. And you can tell
Speaker 1: I drank decaffeinated coffee just now and I'm a little
Speaker 1: more just decalf yeah, and de careful explain how how
Speaker 1: it comes about later on. But there is one plant
Speaker 1: out there, um that naturally is decaffeinated, one naturally decaffeinated bean, right, yeah,
Speaker 1: the Madagascar coffee crazy species, mascar coffea vigner I wonder
Speaker 1: if that was naturally happened naturally, if it was bread
Speaker 1: to be so, I don't know, we're not bread, but
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. So, UM, we're talking about
Speaker 1: the United States, and as big as junkies for coffee
Speaker 1: as we are, there's only one state in um, the
Speaker 1: Union where coffee can grow, and that is Hawaii. And
Speaker 1: that's because Hawaii exists in the bean belt, that's right,
Speaker 1: and they grow. They're very famous and delicious ConA copy
Speaker 1: in the volcanic mountains and the bean belt. It's on
Speaker 1: the Big Island, on the Big Island, Hawaiian guy. Now
Speaker 1: you know that. Uh the bean belt, as you mentioned,
Speaker 1: is uh bounded by the tropics of Capricorn and Cancer
Speaker 1: and Remiller are running right through the middle. That's right.
Speaker 1: And uh the soil climbing and altitude are awesome for coffee.
Speaker 1: It means that you're gonna get a continually producing tree,
Speaker 1: which is really cool. One coffee tree can have uh
Speaker 1: beans ready to pick, beans and bloom flowers blooming all
Speaker 1: at the same time. Do you remember we saw them
Speaker 1: in Guatemala. Oh yeah, I think it's their second or
Speaker 1: third largest export is coffee says their number eight in
Speaker 1: the world. Um, I believe it. Uh. So the coffee
Speaker 1: is grown on a tree. It's a woody evergreen tree
Speaker 1: um that can grow up to thirty ft high. But
Speaker 1: if you're into coffee cultivation, you keep your coffee shrub
Speaker 1: level so you can harvest it easier. You don't want
Speaker 1: to be bringing ladders in there now. And most harvesting
Speaker 1: is done by hand. Um. Like you said, the it's
Speaker 1: it's constantly productive. So you've got a little bit over
Speaker 1: here that's mature. You've got a little bit that's ready. Um,
Speaker 1: And there's flowers. Did you know the coffee tree has
Speaker 1: flowers that smell like jasmine some say. And on the
Speaker 1: spot where those flowers bloomed, about a year later, you're
Speaker 1: going to have fully mature red coffee cherries is what
Speaker 1: they're called. Right for the picking, and they look just
Speaker 1: like cherries they except group in bunches. It tastes different. Um.
Speaker 1: And then one tree in a single season, I thought
Speaker 1: this was this is kind of staggering. Just one tree
Speaker 1: produces one to one and a half pounds, which is
Speaker 1: um less than it's about a half a kilogram. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's one. That's a that that takes a lot of
Speaker 1: trees to produce all the coffee that the world's consuming.
Speaker 1: Thing about that. Luckily we have Bob Bob Boudhan who
Speaker 1: got coffee out of Saudi Arabia. That varieties of coffee, Josh,
Speaker 1: we already mentioned Arabica. There are two Arabic and Robusta. Um,
Speaker 1: if you're talking Arabica, those are the original Ethiopian UH
Speaker 1: coffee trees or descendants of UH. They grow well, I'm
Speaker 1: sorry they are mild and aromatic. Eventually, that's what you're
Speaker 1: gonna get when you drink a cup of it. About
Speaker 1: seventy percent of the world's coffee as Arabica growing higher
Speaker 1: altitudes between two and six thousand feet above sea level
Speaker 1: the Ethiopian Highlands is a great pleasure. Mild temperatures are
Speaker 1: required between sixty and seventy five degrease fahrenheit, and they
Speaker 1: need about sixty inches of rain per year in and
Speaker 1: frost is no good, no, not at all no, because
Speaker 1: if you look at the bean belt, Florida is not
Speaker 1: even in it, Like the keys aren't even in the
Speaker 1: bean belt, So it's probably rare to get a frost,
Speaker 1: if not impossible in the bean belt. The robusta is
Speaker 1: you're gonna have a bean smaller and rounder. Overall. The
Speaker 1: tree is much hardier because it can grow into temperatures
Speaker 1: up to eight degrees fahrenheit and lower altitudes, and it
Speaker 1: packs a lot more punch, about fifty more caffeine, and
Speaker 1: it's more bitter. And I read somewhere that um robusta
Speaker 1: is like has long been considered an inferior type of coffee,
Speaker 1: like it's the hardy like redheaded cousin of Arabica. It's
Speaker 1: on um and that we we here in America consume.
Speaker 1: We we consume a lot of it um. And the
Speaker 1: reason why is because the Pan American Coffee Council, I believe,
Speaker 1: which created something called the coffee break. Have you heard
Speaker 1: of that? Check? Yes, that's a made up thing. From
Speaker 1: the nineteen fifties, um coffee was coming down from up
Speaker 1: on high where only the wealthy could afford it, to
Speaker 1: um being a lot more predominant. And one of the
Speaker 1: ways that it was um it was introduced to wider
Speaker 1: cultures by mixing the inferior robusts of beans with the
Speaker 1: Arabica beans. And so now it was like, sure it
Speaker 1: doesn't taste as good, but it gets you going through
Speaker 1: your your horrible life. So have a have a coffee
Speaker 1: break and get back in there. We drink more of
Speaker 1: the robusta here. At least in the twentieth century we
Speaker 1: started consuming a lot more of it, all right, Yeah, Uh.
Speaker 1: There are more than eight hundred flavor characteristics and a
Speaker 1: coffee bean which is double that of wine. So when
Speaker 1: you hear people talk about wine and all the you know,
Speaker 1: it's smokey, oky and woody like double that. And you
Speaker 1: know wine people, which I'm a wine person, but I'm not.
Speaker 1: I know you're making fun of yourself. I'm making fun
Speaker 1: of my people, but wine, I'm sorry. Double that. And
Speaker 1: you've got the what you've got going on with coffee,
Speaker 1: even though you think you like there's like the morning blend,
Speaker 1: little Colombian, little Brazilian. Yeah, not so. Remember our friend
Speaker 1: Brandon was having a fight with our friend mark over
Speaker 1: because he keeps buying um flavored coffee like the blueberries.
Speaker 1: Seberry coffee should not exist. Marker is going to go
Speaker 1: ahead and tell you that right now. And not only
Speaker 1: should it not exist, but if you make some in
Speaker 1: your coffee maker, you might as will throw it away
Speaker 1: because you can taste it for the next fifty pots
Speaker 1: of coffee. Right, let's talk about the actual coffee bean itself, Chuckers,
Speaker 1: the coffee cherry, Josh, all right, what you got is
Speaker 1: a bright red, like we said, skin when it's ready
Speaker 1: to pick in ripe, Uh, it's green if it's not.
Speaker 1: And apparently coffee pickers they don't want to have more
Speaker 1: than two green per every one picked, otherwise they're going
Speaker 1: to get their hands slapped by coffee plantation owner. Oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: like when they're hand picking them, they I mean they're
Speaker 1: picking them fast, so you're gonna have some green ones.
Speaker 1: But that's their goal, is what I here. The skin
Speaker 1: of the cherry is called the exocarp, very thick and bitter.
Speaker 1: You got a fruit beneath that called the mesocarp. It's
Speaker 1: kind of like the inside of a grape, like if
Speaker 1: you peel the skin off a grape. That's what I
Speaker 1: take the mesocarpe. Yeah, it's gushy and sweet. Uh. Then
Speaker 1: you have the parencoma, which is uh slimy, and it's
Speaker 1: a honey like layer protects the bean. There's gonna be
Speaker 1: two beans generally, and every you know, if all goes
Speaker 1: well in every cherry, and they are covered by a
Speaker 1: parchment like envelope called the endocarp. They're kind of bluish
Speaker 1: green at the time. And then there's the silver skin
Speaker 1: on top of the bean and it's all protecting that
Speaker 1: little nugget that looks sort of like a shelled peanut.
Speaker 1: And the silver skins also called the spermaderm prefer silver skin.
Speaker 1: I think everybody serves prefer silver skin. So uh, if
Speaker 1: you can get rid of all these layers that protect
Speaker 1: the bean. UM. They sically, what you're going down to
Speaker 1: is like the pit of a cherry, the seed, the nut,
Speaker 1: that's where the gold is right. Um. And when you
Speaker 1: harvest them, you said that people they just want the
Speaker 1: bright red ones. But people are harvesting between one and
Speaker 1: two hundred pounds a day by hand. Most coffee harvesting
Speaker 1: takes place by hand. UM. And it depends on where
Speaker 1: you are where it's going to be harvested um or
Speaker 1: when it's going to be harvested. If you are north
Speaker 1: of the equator, you're going to harvest between September and March.
Speaker 1: If you're south of the equator, you're going to um
Speaker 1: harvest between April and May, which is not spring. Right,
Speaker 1: So the summertime it's basically the only time they're not harvesting.
Speaker 1: And when you um, when you've got them harvested, you've
Speaker 1: got them picked, you have your hundred to two hundred
Speaker 1: pounds for the day. UM. Depending on the type of
Speaker 1: coffee plantation, you're going to um dry them by one
Speaker 1: of two methods. There's basically just two methods of dry
Speaker 1: which is pretty cool considering that they are huge, huge,
Speaker 1: concerns that like produce coffee. Yeah, and and there's still
Speaker 1: like two kind of primitive means of drying them before
Speaker 1: we get into the cool method. I want to point
Speaker 1: out that all of this is speed is key because
Speaker 1: the freshness of coffee is the secret to good coffee.
Speaker 1: So if you pick beans that morning, they're being process
Speaker 1: that afternoon. They don't sit around in barrels for a
Speaker 1: few days at all, unless they're being dried. Then they
Speaker 1: sit around for seven to ten that's part of the processing.
Speaker 1: So basically, um, if you're using the dry method of drying, um,
Speaker 1: you are basically you're laying the coffee beans out in
Speaker 1: the sun or the coffee cherries I'm sorry, big concrete slab.
Speaker 1: You're laying them out in the sun, um, and you're
Speaker 1: letting them dry. Uh. And after about seven to ten days, um,
Speaker 1: and you're raking them periodically, just kind of turn them
Speaker 1: over and get some air underneath them. The uh, the
Speaker 1: cherries will have dried enough so that there's only about
Speaker 1: eleven percent moisture in the whole coffee cherry. And um,
Speaker 1: you can tell that it's ready because the beans rattle inside.
Speaker 1: So it makes a good children's toy as well. I
Speaker 1: couldn't find who dries dry like I'm sure you can
Speaker 1: find out, like whatever coffee if you want to really
Speaker 1: want to research what kind of coffee you want to drink, Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm sure you can tell, like who does the dry method,
Speaker 1: because it's I mean, I get the feeling that dry
Speaker 1: methods probably superior because anything that usually takes a little longer,
Speaker 1: it's probably worth it. Sure. And also it doesn't use
Speaker 1: enzymes like the wet method. I get the impression that, um,
Speaker 1: if you get from a small plantation, probably using the
Speaker 1: dry method. The wet method uses enzymes and fermentation. And
Speaker 1: basically you take the cherries and throw them into a
Speaker 1: vat of water. After I'm sorry you you get the
Speaker 1: pulp and skin peeled away. Then you throw it into
Speaker 1: a vat to ferment for a couple of days, and um,
Speaker 1: the natural enzymes apparently eat away the little envelope in
Speaker 1: the silver skin and then you have the beans left over.
Speaker 1: That's right. But and you still need to dry up
Speaker 1: for about four days in the sun, just like the
Speaker 1: dry method. And uh, you let it rest at night
Speaker 1: sometimes if you don't want to do if you want
Speaker 1: to speed it up even more. You don't do the
Speaker 1: sun dry method. You put it in these big rotating
Speaker 1: drums that pump in hot air. Uh, and that'll dry
Speaker 1: it out. Uh. And it's spermating. But if it smells
Speaker 1: too much like vinegar, that means of spermating too much,
Speaker 1: is there? Right? Yeah, that's what I hear. Okay, So
Speaker 1: let's say you have a bunch of dry coffee. What
Speaker 1: you have is a commodity, like we said, second only
Speaker 1: to oil and total dollars traded. And uh, it's called
Speaker 1: green coffee because coffee producers don't roast coffee. Roasters roast
Speaker 1: the coffee and they buy their green coffee from coffee producers.
Speaker 1: So you've got Um, if you bought a bunch of
Speaker 1: green coffee, what you would have is traditionally a big
Speaker 1: jute or cecil bag filled with coffee. Still is this day? Yeah? Um,
Speaker 1: and uh it's going to be train. It'sward to the
Speaker 1: tune of about seven million tons of green coffee shift
Speaker 1: worldwide every year. Now it's already hold too at this point,
Speaker 1: right right, it's just the beans, right Yeah. So the
Speaker 1: hauling process, you know, it's a it's a machine that
Speaker 1: does that and then they sort them according to to class,
Speaker 1: like grade A beans, Grade BE beans. Great sin about
Speaker 1: that part, yes, but eventually you're going to get a
Speaker 1: nice bean, right, And they grade them first by size
Speaker 1: and then by density. And you want the bigger, heavier
Speaker 1: ones are superior to the smaller ones. And either they're
Speaker 1: graded by hand like along and like a conveyor belt,
Speaker 1: or there's um a conveyor belt and puffs of air
Speaker 1: that will puff off the lighter, smaller ones. Yeah, or
Speaker 1: they have little machines like uh, disorders that sort of
Speaker 1: according to size. There's all different kinds of machines. Now, yes,
Speaker 1: they also have ones that look exactly like giant spiders
Speaker 1: that are terrifying, but they get the job done all right.
Speaker 1: Now to the roasting, which is that's the good stuff. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's where coffee really gets its u a roma and
Speaker 1: its flavor, eventual flavor. Uh. And here's an interesting fact.
Speaker 1: Roasting reduces caffeine. Is that right? That's right. So even
Speaker 1: though an espresso roast takes fourteen minutes compared to a
Speaker 1: seven minute light American roast, an espresso bean has a
Speaker 1: lot less caffeine than just a regular thing, a regular bean. Huh,
Speaker 1: so you may say, why do you get so jacked up?
Speaker 1: It's because the grind and the concentrated brew. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: never knew that. I thought the espresso bean is like
Speaker 1: loaded with extra caffeine. I guess I would have. I
Speaker 1: would have imagined the same thing, because you quite like
Speaker 1: taste with caffeine content too. Yeah. True. So like the blacker,
Speaker 1: it is the thicker and richer that tastes you just
Speaker 1: like this must be loaded with caffeine. Very interesting, chuckers.
Speaker 1: So we're roasting now. Yeah, So you've got roasting drum
Speaker 1: um that's capable of achieving temperatures of degrees fair height,
Speaker 1: which is two degrees celsius and um. The key is
Speaker 1: not just the heat, but the rotation of the drums. Um.
Speaker 1: You can roast coffee at that heat as long as
Speaker 1: it's moving, so it won't burn. I don't want to burn.
Speaker 1: It's hot, but it's not gonna burn. Espresso beans are
Speaker 1: burned a little bit, right. Um. So there's there's a
Speaker 1: couple of If you are a coffee roaster, you're you're
Speaker 1: looking for a couple of things. The first thing is
Speaker 1: that the beans should start to turn yellow, smell a
Speaker 1: little bit like popcorn. Like you said, they shouldn't smell
Speaker 1: like vinegar at all. You want to throw that out, um,
Speaker 1: And then you're going to hear something called the pop
Speaker 1: and the coffee bean is just popped and it's hit
Speaker 1: about four hundred degrees ferret height. It doubles in size
Speaker 1: at that point. Yeah. Um, And that's really the beginning
Speaker 1: of the real roasting process. After that happens, you really
Speaker 1: want to be Johnny on the Spot paying attention to
Speaker 1: this because things move pretty fast after that. Um. Through
Speaker 1: a process called pyrolysis. Um, the heat extracts the oil
Speaker 1: and they turn the coffee from green or yellow to
Speaker 1: a nice, rich brown, And now it's really being roast
Speaker 1: and eventually almost a black. Yeah. It depends like like
Speaker 1: you said, if you are going to make espresso roast,
Speaker 1: you're gonna heat it for fourteen minutes and basically you're
Speaker 1: toasting these things. You're burning them, and the sugars inside
Speaker 1: are caramelizing. Right. And by the way, God help you
Speaker 1: if you say espresso, or even worse, if you sell
Speaker 1: espresso and you have a sign that says espresso, come
Speaker 1: on and then chuck. There's the second pop, and the
Speaker 1: second pop is like I'm done, take me out. Uh.
Speaker 1: You talked about the roasters, these roastmasters, and they are
Speaker 1: called roastmasters because it is a very specialized job. What
Speaker 1: they do a lot of times is because you don't
Speaker 1: want to roast you know, ten thousand beans and have
Speaker 1: a bad batch. So what they'll do is they have
Speaker 1: a side room where they a little tiny batch and
Speaker 1: this is where the roastmaster does their taste testing. They'll
Speaker 1: brew up four cups of coffee from different parts of
Speaker 1: the batch just to make sure they've covered it all. Uh.
Speaker 1: They push aside the phone, and when they don't put
Speaker 1: it in a coffee maker, they put the grounds in
Speaker 1: a cup with hot water and let's steep, you know,
Speaker 1: like old school. Yeah, that's how I make coffee or
Speaker 1: what I like to call camping style. Do you do
Speaker 1: that at home? Uh? Yeah, you just boil it with
Speaker 1: the French press, Oh, French pressure. I have several ways.
Speaker 1: There's all. I also have this coffee maker that you
Speaker 1: may got me. The boat them and it uses vacuum.
Speaker 1: It uses the vacuum to suck water up into this
Speaker 1: top bulb and it just sits there and percolates and
Speaker 1: then it drips back down really, but just the coffee
Speaker 1: does the ground stay up above, and then you take
Speaker 1: the top part off and you've got like a little
Speaker 1: pot of coffee. It's awesome. It's fun to watch. I
Speaker 1: find the de press pot is a little chalky for
Speaker 1: my taste. Oh yeah, it totally is. But I guess
Speaker 1: it's just you know, if you like that, you like it,
Speaker 1: but you have to you have to grind it to
Speaker 1: its right. Yeah, which we'll talk about in a second.
Speaker 1: It's all about the ground, Josh. But what they do is,
Speaker 1: like I said, they've got the small batch. They broke
Speaker 1: the four cups. They steep it and then they push
Speaker 1: aside the foam on the surface to release a roma,
Speaker 1: and that's called breaking the cup. They sniff it. Then
Speaker 1: they skim the grounds from the surface and do a
Speaker 1: little sip and spit for each cup, and then they say, hey,
Speaker 1: it's ready, go ahead and throw the big batch. And
Speaker 1: then when no one's looking, they snort the grounds. That's right.
Speaker 1: And another interesting thing is that once they roasted, it
Speaker 1: actually gets packaged still hot into the bag hot, and
Speaker 1: they pump in nitrogen to replace the oxygen. And because
Speaker 1: you don't want oxygen and then uh that you know,
Speaker 1: the vacuum seals. Yeah, oxygen degrades the freshness of coffee
Speaker 1: faster than anything else. So yeah, that's why everything's vacuum sealed. Well,
Speaker 1: let's go. We're there. So uh well, there's four keys
Speaker 1: to making really good coffee. Right, You've got your roasted coffee.
Speaker 1: It's been roasted masterfully. Um. And now it's your turn.
Speaker 1: You have a bag of beans that's vacuum sealed, very fresh.
Speaker 1: You can still tell it's warm even chuck um. And
Speaker 1: so you have four things you want to take into consideration. Freshness,
Speaker 1: the type of the grind, the ratio of water to coffee,
Speaker 1: and then water purity and the purity of your coffee maker.
Speaker 1: And by the way, don't don't either a buy ground
Speaker 1: coffee or be buy coffee and grind it in the store.
Speaker 1: You're you're not doing yourselves any favors if you can,
Speaker 1: and tell everybody just leave you alone while you enjoy
Speaker 1: your coffee. Do whatever you want people. But if you're
Speaker 1: a coffee connoisseur, yeah, and you're not doing that. You're grinding.
Speaker 1: You have a home grinder, you're buying beans, you have
Speaker 1: a home grinder and you're grinding just enough to make
Speaker 1: a couple of cups of coffee. Well, and not only
Speaker 1: do you have a home grinder, but you should have
Speaker 1: a nice grinder. I went to research Emily drinks a
Speaker 1: latte every morning of her life, and she had a
Speaker 1: crappy little grinder and a crappy espresso machine. So I
Speaker 1: invested in like the good stuff in The difference between
Speaker 1: the fifteen dollar grinder and the hundred dollar grinder is massive,
Speaker 1: I would imagine. So, yes, grinder, I've heard burg grinders
Speaker 1: are like the best one. It's a burg grinder, and um,
Speaker 1: it's you know, I don't know enough about coffee to
Speaker 1: know the difference, but I started reading up on it
Speaker 1: and it said the grind is the key. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: as you say, the grind is the key, you've got
Speaker 1: your freshness. You don't want coffee that's older than like
Speaker 1: two weeks. You don't want to grind it ahead of time. Um,
Speaker 1: and if you do end up somehow with some ground coffee,
Speaker 1: you want to keep it in the fridge and it
Speaker 1: will stay up to two weeks. Don't try to get
Speaker 1: Chuck Bryant to drink any of it, though, No I'm
Speaker 1: not like that. I'll drink anything. I'm just teaching. But
Speaker 1: the grind, like you say, is what releases all of
Speaker 1: the flavors and aromas and every little, great little nugget
Speaker 1: of goodness and coffee. It's the way you grind it.
Speaker 1: And anybody who's ever ground coffee, especially at like a
Speaker 1: Trader Joe's or something, you can adjust then die and
Speaker 1: it will say French press, espresso, automatic drip and espressoes
Speaker 1: are really fine grind very and Turkish is actually even
Speaker 1: finer than that. UM. But the grind is related to
Speaker 1: the amount of time it takes to make the coffee.
Speaker 1: So espresso is very fine, almost powdery, and that takes
Speaker 1: about twenty five seconds to make espresso. It takes about
Speaker 1: ten minutes to make a pot of UM regular drip coffee.
Speaker 1: So for that you have a coarser grind is what
Speaker 1: it's called. UM. And then also, Chuck, I want to
Speaker 1: mention there's Cowboy coffee. You're talking about how the roastmaster
Speaker 1: um just mashes up some coffee that called Cowboy coffee.
Speaker 1: Cowboy coffee. Yeah, Um, And apparently it used to be
Speaker 1: very difficult for cookie to get anybody to grind coffee
Speaker 1: because that gets sold very very often. So um, I
Speaker 1: believe in the nineteenth century there was a coffee company
Speaker 1: called art Buckles Coffee, and they put a peppermintstick and
Speaker 1: every bag of coffee so that cookie could be like, hey,
Speaker 1: whoever grinds this gets really stick and yeah, apparently cookie
Speaker 1: had no trouble after that. That's a great story job.
Speaker 1: I agree, I love it. So you talked about proportion
Speaker 1: of water to coffee. Everyone has their slight variations. Some
Speaker 1: people like a little stronger, some people like a little weaker. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I found this this ratio to be on, to be wanting,
Speaker 1: because what we have here in this article is two
Speaker 1: tablespoons of ground coffee for six ounces of water. They
Speaker 1: say that makes a strong cut, but you say more.
Speaker 1: I like a little more coffee than that, a little more,
Speaker 1: which is like a heaping kitchen spoon, no kitten spoons,
Speaker 1: about one table spoon two of those? Yeah, that's what
Speaker 1: I mean. Yeah, yes, heaping for sure. Yeah yeah, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: you know you don't level it off. You're like, if
Speaker 1: it if it doesn't fall off on the way into
Speaker 1: the basket or the French press, right, okay. And they
Speaker 1: also say that cold water. Fresh cold water is what
Speaker 1: you really want to start with, and eventually you want
Speaker 1: to end up with two grease fahrenheit ninety three celsius.
Speaker 1: If you want to really get all the flavor out
Speaker 1: of the beans and keep your maker clean, gotta clean
Speaker 1: the thing out. Well, there's the irony. If your coffee
Speaker 1: smells like vinegar, you've got bad coffee. But you want
Speaker 1: to use a vinegar solution to clean out your coffee
Speaker 1: every once in a while, rent it out. I don't
Speaker 1: know what the proportion is make it up. I think
Speaker 1: if yeah, there, I mean, there's got to be a
Speaker 1: certain amount of weeks or amount of coffee pots of brood.
Speaker 1: But if you're starting to taste bitter coffee, then it's
Speaker 1: it's time. Or if you taste blueberry coffee and you
Speaker 1: want to do the vinegar thing to or throw it out.
Speaker 1: And then we talked about the Madagascar coffee species um
Speaker 1: that naturally produces decaf but um, most people don't drink this. Instead,
Speaker 1: they're drinking stuff that um has been removed somehow. The
Speaker 1: caffeine has been removed from the beans, either by using
Speaker 1: a chemical solvent gross which extracts the caffeine and then
Speaker 1: the solvents washed away. Wow. Uh. And then the other
Speaker 1: method is to steam the beans nice and um. That
Speaker 1: gets some of the outer part of the bean um,
Speaker 1: which apparently packs the most caffeine worn away, and you've
Speaker 1: got decalf and then I think they scrape the rest
Speaker 1: of it a way after that even. Yeah. So if
Speaker 1: you're if you're into healthy, then get organic decaf. If
Speaker 1: you want decaf non chemical solvent. Yah, you don't want
Speaker 1: to be drinking that, yeah. Um So then coffee around
Speaker 1: the world Chuck America. Thank you to UM our friends
Speaker 1: at Starbucks who founded their company in nineteen seventy one.
Speaker 1: UM has kind of come out of its haze of
Speaker 1: not that great coffee, and it's starting to understand like, oh,
Speaker 1: there's really good coffee out there, and it's it's a
Speaker 1: good coffee because I've heard I've heard coffee people say,
Speaker 1: you know, store Bucks really need a good coffee because X,
Speaker 1: Y and Z. I was trying to be polite here
Speaker 1: and I was thinking Starbucks of nine not Starbucks of
Speaker 1: two thousand eleven. UM Starbucks opened America up to the
Speaker 1: concept of good coffee. Doesn't necessarily serve it good coffee
Speaker 1: or at least expensive coffee, right. Um. But for the
Speaker 1: most part, Americans still prefer the American roast, which is
Speaker 1: about a seven minute roast, like you said, um, which
Speaker 1: is just shameful if you ask me. So what do
Speaker 1: you think though, I mean, I'm not an officio, were
Speaker 1: talking about this, Well, I don't know. I mean I
Speaker 1: just hear coffee snobs say, you know, store Bucks isn't
Speaker 1: even good. But then I think those are people that
Speaker 1: are just fighting the big mass corporation that's on every corner. Well,
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, I I tend to go with
Speaker 1: the coffee snobs in that one. I think it used
Speaker 1: to be a lot about like way, there's way too
Speaker 1: many Starbucks out there, and now I think it's like
Speaker 1: they're just not The coffee just doesn't taste that good.
Speaker 1: It's really cloying. But the thing is is, I wonder
Speaker 1: also if I'm missing something, because how does Starbucks not
Speaker 1: know that it's coffee tastes like this? Why wouldn't they
Speaker 1: change it? What's the deal. I'm sure someone out there
Speaker 1: We're gonna get some good emails on this from people
Speaker 1: who really know how they treat their beans. From Ted
Speaker 1: Starbuck himself, it's gonna be like I'm so you, Teddy
Speaker 1: Starbuck France Prince roast, very dark, robust cafe l it's
Speaker 1: gonna be half milk, half coffee. I don't know why
Speaker 1: you'd want to ruin your coffee with half milk. It's good,
Speaker 1: is it? Yeah? Viennese roast, I think Vienna was the first.
Speaker 1: I think the first coffee shop in Europe was in Vienna.
Speaker 1: I might be wrong that I can't remember. I think so.
Speaker 1: I think so. Possibly we'll find out at any rate.
Speaker 1: The Viennese roast is very popular. Um dark roads two
Speaker 1: thirds dark roast beans one third regular roast, and the
Speaker 1: European roast is the flip the reverse of those. So
Speaker 1: it's one third dark and two thirds light. Yes. Uh.
Speaker 1: And then of course you have espresso um, which, like
Speaker 1: you said, it's there's less caffeine, but you get the
Speaker 1: big jolt out of it by grinding it. So just
Speaker 1: pulverizing every hiding place where caffeine can hang. Have you
Speaker 1: ever seen maholland drive David Lynch the espresso seen, I
Speaker 1: don't remember it. It's when they it's some one of
Speaker 1: those mysterious meetings and David Lynch movies or like, who
Speaker 1: are these people and why are they having this mysterious meeting?
Speaker 1: And they serve this one guy. He's like, you know,
Speaker 1: we searched the world over for this espresso, and we
Speaker 1: know you're gonna approve of this one. And they surf
Speaker 1: into the guy and he drinks it and then spits
Speaker 1: it up and a nap. So good god, he's the
Speaker 1: best Turkish roast. What's what's the proverb that coffee should
Speaker 1: be black as hell, strong as death, sweet as love,
Speaker 1: So what does that mean? They just put a lot
Speaker 1: of sugar in it. They like it sweet? Oh, I
Speaker 1: think it's way. I think it's more than that. So
Speaker 1: they have um, carter mom and chicory and coriander in
Speaker 1: their coffee. Um. They also have you ever had like
Speaker 1: Mexican coffee or Mexican chocolate coffee with like cinnamon and um,
Speaker 1: like cayenne pepper in it, and I don't know, very
Speaker 1: good um. And then yes, they also put some some
Speaker 1: sugar in there, I believe. And it's very finely ground,
Speaker 1: like I said, even more finely ground than espresso. Boy,
Speaker 1: that's powdery. Yeah, and thick. They make it real thick yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Uh in Cuba, You're gonna get the Cafe Cubano, which
Speaker 1: you do it like a shot, which is pretty cool,
Speaker 1: and it's like espresso, but you don't sip it with
Speaker 1: your uh sambuca lemon twist or whatever. Have you ever
Speaker 1: had a lemon twist with espresso? I never have no
Speaker 1: remember Balky in um Beverly Hills cop he said, can
Speaker 1: I interest you in in? Yeah? Yeah? Uh? And then
Speaker 1: in Thailand, I didn't realize this coffee is really strong
Speaker 1: there and it is chickeny tinged, iced and sweetened with
Speaker 1: condensed milk. I don't know if they don't drink hot
Speaker 1: coffee at all, or I know it's in Japan. It's
Speaker 1: like coffee is huge, and I think it's always hot
Speaker 1: in Thailand and they're like, it's too hot for hot coffee.
Speaker 1: It is so apparently if you want to make it
Speaker 1: a home, you just take some coffee, a little sweet
Speaker 1: and condensed milk and some ice and there's your thaie coffee. Boom,
Speaker 1: so chuck. I am heartened by some recent research that
Speaker 1: has come to light that basically says, drink as much
Speaker 1: coffee as you like. Yeah. They I mean they used
Speaker 1: to say like coffee is bad for you. You don't
Speaker 1: want to have too much right now, bowlic acid, too
Speaker 1: much caffeine will make you go shoot people. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's been crazy. There's good and bad. Let's just say that.
Speaker 1: So let's talk about some there's some sort of weird
Speaker 1: link between coffee consumption and UM diabetes. There's a negative correlation,
Speaker 1: whereas the more coffee you drink, the lower your risk
Speaker 1: of diabetes, right two diabetes specifically. Yeah, they did nine
Speaker 1: studies about five years ago, and four to six cups
Speaker 1: of coffee per day versus two or less us reduced
Speaker 1: your risk by which is pretty significant. Yeah, that's extremely
Speaker 1: significant thirty if you drink more than six cups a day,
Speaker 1: all right, and whether you drink decaf or caffeinated, the
Speaker 1: results were the same. Yeah. So it's not the caffeine,
Speaker 1: which I thought was probably the bullock acid. We're gonna
Speaker 1: do a caffeine podcast by the way. Okay, that's coming um.
Speaker 1: Free radicals, which may or may not exist. UM. Supposedly
Speaker 1: there's phytochemicals about a thousand of them uh in coffee
Speaker 1: beans and UH. If free radicals do exist, these phytochemicals
Speaker 1: act as antioxidants. Preventing the aging process and all sorts
Speaker 1: of cellular damage if free radicals exist. Uh. They say
Speaker 1: that coffee improves memory and cognition. They did plenty of
Speaker 1: studies on this, and coffee drinkers people that drink coffee
Speaker 1: in the morning especially performed better than non drinkers and
Speaker 1: when it comes to learning new information. Yeah, I was
Speaker 1: surprised by this. Like I'm not surprised, but I wonder
Speaker 1: if they did a follow up, like four hours later,
Speaker 1: like how you doing now? Exactly? Yeah, the coffee crash,
Speaker 1: I get that. Which is I think white people like
Speaker 1: my brother in law drink coffee all day long. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there is no coffee crash when you drink two pots today. No,
Speaker 1: I know what you mean. But you also don't sleep
Speaker 1: and like your calf muscles rupture through your skin. They
Speaker 1: don't study on that. I can tell you, all right,
Speaker 1: what about the bad? Because you know not not not
Speaker 1: everything is all good. Um. Well, when you drink a
Speaker 1: lot of coffee, you pee calcium, and uh that means
Speaker 1: that you are losing bone density e g. Coffee can
Speaker 1: increase OSTEO process. But they say add a little milk
Speaker 1: to your coffee, balance it out. Oh yeah, that's what.
Speaker 1: That's what it says here at least, it definitely makes
Speaker 1: sense or yogurt, But who wants to eat yogurt? So
Speaker 1: if you put two I love yogurt. I'm just kidding,
Speaker 1: all like it, all right? Two tablespoons of only the
Speaker 1: good stuff, like only Greek yogurt. Um, two tablespoons of
Speaker 1: milk or yogurt per cup of coffee. I don't see
Speaker 1: putting yogurt in coffee though, Like you'd have to be
Speaker 1: literally insane to do that. It seems like it would
Speaker 1: just coagulate, ump up, like they would take you away
Speaker 1: and lock you up if somebody saw you putting yogurt
Speaker 1: in your coffee. Josh, I know you like your skin.
Speaker 1: I know you like to remain youthful and and handsome
Speaker 1: and sexy. But it's just like an exercise and futility.
Speaker 1: I feel like I disagree. Coffee has antioxidants. If you
Speaker 1: drink it too much of it, it will cause your
Speaker 1: skin to wrinkle, probably quicker than your average dude who
Speaker 1: doesn't because of dehydration. That's what they say. I've heard that.
Speaker 1: I don't know about this weight gain thing. Um. Basically,
Speaker 1: there's a change in blood sugar that the caffeine high
Speaker 1: can produce, which is strange because that would seem to
Speaker 1: um contradict the diabetes study if there was a less
Speaker 1: risk less of a risk of diabetes. Huh um. But apparently, um,
Speaker 1: if we we because we love eating donuts with our
Speaker 1: coffee and that kind of thing too. Um. You can
Speaker 1: actually gain weight if you eat a lot of coffee
Speaker 1: because you're like, I would have another crowler? Why not?
Speaker 1: Because it goes do you dunk? I have dunked in
Speaker 1: the past. I'm not that big on it. I I
Speaker 1: also will dunk in oreo from time to time, but
Speaker 1: it's not like every time any oreos, I have to
Speaker 1: have milk. I thought you oreon coffee, okay? Uh. And
Speaker 1: then coffee is one of the most heavily sprayed crops
Speaker 1: on the planet, with pesticides and herbicides and chemicals. So
Speaker 1: if you know, if you're not into that, you should
Speaker 1: get organic coffee. Thank you, Norman Borlog. And just a
Speaker 1: couple of more little facts here. I'm gonna skip most
Speaker 1: of these, but um, I will say that fair trade coffee,
Speaker 1: if you have a heart, you will seek out fair
Speaker 1: trade coffee because for every I'm sorry. The pickers themselves
Speaker 1: earned as little as four cents per pound, and the
Speaker 1: farmer earns as little as twelve cents per pounds sold.
Speaker 1: So the fair trade movement tries to redistribute profits so
Speaker 1: that all these people earn decent wages. I believe the
Speaker 1: fair trade movement originated around coffee production, like I think
Speaker 1: that was the first industry. I think that's where it's
Speaker 1: cradle lie. And finally, Josh, if you are one of
Speaker 1: those dudes or ladies who start your day off by
Speaker 1: going to your local coffee shop to get a cup
Speaker 1: of coffee on your way to work, you're gonna wait
Speaker 1: in line about forty five hours a year for that coffee.
Speaker 1: Not too bad a couple of days. That's a lot, though. Uh.
Speaker 1: You're also going to drop about a hundred and sixty
Speaker 1: five bucks on coffee every year. I don't know that
Speaker 1: seems that to me looks like a stat if you
Speaker 1: buy and make your own coffee, Because I bought one
Speaker 1: of those gingerbread ones yesterday at Starbucks. It was like five,
Speaker 1: let's even say four bucks, and you drink coffee every day,
Speaker 1: you buy one a day. There's plenty of people out
Speaker 1: there by cups of coffee. That's more than a thousand
Speaker 1: dollars on coffee a year. That's way low. Then, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's just a stupid statistic you came up with. I'm
Speaker 1: done with my coffee, We're done with a podcast. Well, no,
Speaker 1: we're not quite done yet. They got some stuff, chuck.
Speaker 1: Let's forego listener mail and instead, sure, we're not gonna
Speaker 1: just let you go before we let everybody go. Um,
Speaker 1: we want to wish everyone a very happy New Year. Yeah,
Speaker 1: no matter where you are, no matter what time it is,
Speaker 1: we are um wishing you a very very happy, safe, bountiful, beautiful,
Speaker 1: wonderful two thou twelve. Yeah, and that's what I love
Speaker 1: about New Year is it's everyone We're not going to
Speaker 1: get a malc and well you know in my country
Speaker 1: we don't do this or down here, it's not that
Speaker 1: everyone gets a New Year. So you must really love
Speaker 1: New Year's. Love it? Yeah, so Mary Mary, New Year.
Speaker 1: And I want to also say very very special happy
Speaker 1: birthday to a very very special girl who um has
Speaker 1: her birthday the two days before New Year's. Myum, I
Speaker 1: was assuming that, well, happy birthday. We love, Happy birthday
Speaker 1: you me and happy New Year to everybody and if
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