1 00:00:00,760 --> 00:00:03,440 Speaker 1: That day when I was coming down from the drugs 2 00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:05,200 Speaker 1: and the alcohol from the night before, and I'm sitting 3 00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:07,320 Speaker 1: on my knees in my dirty studio apartment in the 4 00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:10,640 Speaker 1: West Village, and I said, God, Universe, whoever's out there, 5 00:00:11,360 --> 00:00:12,320 Speaker 1: I need a miracle. 6 00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:17,680 Speaker 2: Gabby Bernstein grows from rock bottom to global phenomenon, number 7 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:20,600 Speaker 2: one New York Times best selling author and spiritual teacher, 8 00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:23,840 Speaker 2: turning her darkest moments into a mission to help millions. 9 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:29,240 Speaker 1: That moment was the most terrifying moment and the most 10 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:30,960 Speaker 1: relieving moment. 11 00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:35,280 Speaker 2: From breakdowns to breakthroughs. This is a deeply personal reckoning 12 00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:37,240 Speaker 2: with what it takes to truly heal. 13 00:00:37,520 --> 00:00:41,159 Speaker 1: The people that we choose to be in relationship with. Particular, 14 00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:44,960 Speaker 1: our romantic partners often are a reflection of our own. 15 00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:50,040 Speaker 2: Joined by our best friend and yoga teacher, Terra Styles, I'm. 16 00:00:49,880 --> 00:00:52,000 Speaker 3: Ready to fall apart again so I can put myself 17 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:55,120 Speaker 3: back together, because the more we allow ourselves to do that, 18 00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:56,440 Speaker 3: the stronger we become. 19 00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:59,880 Speaker 2: Join host Martin Luther King the Third, Andrea Waters, k, 20 00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:03,920 Speaker 2: Mark Kilberger, and Craig Kilberger for an honest, soul stirring 21 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:08,240 Speaker 2: conversation about breaking cycles, reclaiming purpose, and what it takes 22 00:01:08,280 --> 00:01:09,319 Speaker 2: to begin again. 23 00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:13,040 Speaker 4: What did you say to yourself the day before to 24 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:14,640 Speaker 4: say I need to change? 25 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:16,479 Speaker 1: I still made that twice that my soul. 26 00:01:16,440 --> 00:01:26,280 Speaker 5: Said, Welcome to my legacy. Today's guest is Gabby Bernstein. 27 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:29,679 Speaker 5: Gabby Bernstein has built a global following by opening up 28 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:34,520 Speaker 5: about her personal journey from addiction to trauma to transformation. Gabby, 29 00:01:34,680 --> 00:01:38,040 Speaker 5: we are so honored and so excited all of us, 30 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:41,360 Speaker 5: particularly this wonderful woman, to have you with us here today. So, Gabby, 31 00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:45,119 Speaker 5: could we ask you to introduce your close friend who 32 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:46,759 Speaker 5: is your plus one here today? 33 00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:51,040 Speaker 1: Well? I love this format, I love being with you guys. 34 00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:53,200 Speaker 1: I'm so thrilled to be here. And when I was 35 00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:57,160 Speaker 1: invited to ask a plus one to join me, there 36 00:01:57,280 --> 00:02:01,840 Speaker 1: was literally no question in my mind that my beloved 37 00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:06,040 Speaker 1: soul sister Tara Styles was going to be joining us today. 38 00:02:06,520 --> 00:02:10,160 Speaker 1: And Tara is the founder of Stralla Yoga. I'm not 39 00:02:10,240 --> 00:02:13,320 Speaker 1: the biggest yogi. I'm not. I like a hit workout, 40 00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:16,280 Speaker 1: I like something. I like my deep meditation, and I 41 00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:19,520 Speaker 1: like my big hit workouts. The only yoga that I 42 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:22,720 Speaker 1: love is Stralla Yoga. I could say in a two 43 00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:26,160 Speaker 1: hours Stralla class with Tara and ask for more. And 44 00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:29,920 Speaker 1: so that's my testimonial today for Tara. But she's a 45 00:02:29,919 --> 00:02:33,240 Speaker 1: world renowned yogi and spiritual teacher and also one of 46 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:35,840 Speaker 1: my best friends in the world. And have the privilege 47 00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:38,400 Speaker 1: of both actually living in towns right next to each 48 00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:40,960 Speaker 1: other and having children that are growing up together and 49 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,400 Speaker 1: being a spiritual family in our little country town. And 50 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:46,960 Speaker 1: so you're going to see our connection and our shared 51 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,560 Speaker 1: love for each other here today. So thank you for 52 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:49,760 Speaker 1: letting me bring my plus one. 53 00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:52,960 Speaker 6: Well, what a beautiful day. I have to tell all 54 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:56,120 Speaker 6: of our listeners and viewers that both of these ladies 55 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:59,080 Speaker 6: live in my phone. I want to start with your 56 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:02,680 Speaker 6: incredible friend, because I know that you've described each other 57 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:06,240 Speaker 6: as lifelines. So, Gabby, how did you meet Tara and 58 00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:07,959 Speaker 6: what about her made you think? 59 00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:08,280 Speaker 4: You know? 60 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,360 Speaker 6: I need her in my life. 61 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:14,320 Speaker 1: Tara and I are amongst this community of a generation 62 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:18,120 Speaker 1: of spiritual teachers that started to do things in a 63 00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:22,560 Speaker 1: new way, you know, even sort of being named by 64 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:26,040 Speaker 1: in the media as the rebel yogi or the next 65 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:29,000 Speaker 1: generation thought leader. And so it was around it was 66 00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:32,640 Speaker 1: in the early two thousands, really around two thousand and 67 00:03:32,639 --> 00:03:35,920 Speaker 1: five that my career began as a spiritual teachers we're 68 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:38,240 Speaker 1: talking about twenty years ago, and at the same time 69 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:41,440 Speaker 1: Tara was in the same position, and we were sort 70 00:03:41,440 --> 00:03:44,680 Speaker 1: of redefining the rules and expanding the spiritual lexicon and 71 00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:47,800 Speaker 1: giving people permission to do it their way and to 72 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:51,000 Speaker 1: have a faith of their own understanding or a yoga 73 00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:53,960 Speaker 1: of their own, and to sort of be more flexible 74 00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:58,000 Speaker 1: with practice and to translate and demystify spiritual principles in 75 00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,920 Speaker 1: a way that our generation was going to really get it. 76 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:04,080 Speaker 1: And so, as you can imagine, we really found each 77 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:08,480 Speaker 1: other like magnetized towards each other at that time. And 78 00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:10,480 Speaker 1: I believe that in many ways we really grew up 79 00:04:10,520 --> 00:04:14,240 Speaker 1: together as teachers because we had a shared mission and 80 00:04:14,280 --> 00:04:18,560 Speaker 1: a shared intention, and we found our ways working together 81 00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:23,480 Speaker 1: in really beautiful, creative, collaborative ways. And then as we 82 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:26,080 Speaker 1: grew up, we were the kind of friendship where we 83 00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,240 Speaker 1: could meet up randomly in Berlin and have dinner and 84 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:30,000 Speaker 1: having not haven't seen each other for two years, but 85 00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:32,719 Speaker 1: we're both working in Berlin and have this incredible dinner 86 00:04:32,720 --> 00:04:35,800 Speaker 1: that we'll never forget. And then fast forward twenty years later, 87 00:04:35,880 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 1: we live in the same community and this is when 88 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:43,400 Speaker 1: the friendship is just escalated to the point where our children, 89 00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:47,720 Speaker 1: our dear friends, our husbands or friends, we will sit 90 00:04:47,760 --> 00:04:51,400 Speaker 1: around the kitchen and just make food and do tied 91 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:54,359 Speaker 1: she and the second that I lie on the floor, 92 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:56,760 Speaker 1: it's like I'm a cat around Tara. The second I 93 00:04:56,800 --> 00:05:01,800 Speaker 1: sit on the floor, Tara starts giving me adjustments. It's 94 00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:04,080 Speaker 1: just the most extraordinary friendship. But the thing I'll say 95 00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:06,120 Speaker 1: that that is the most beautiful part of our friendship 96 00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:10,160 Speaker 1: is that Tara's tuned into me, and we're tuned to 97 00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:13,480 Speaker 1: each other in a frequency that's really special. And at 98 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:14,840 Speaker 1: a time when I was going through a lot in 99 00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:17,880 Speaker 1: December and January, out of nowhere, I would get these 100 00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:20,719 Speaker 1: voice memos from Tara saying, I want you to know 101 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,240 Speaker 1: how much I love you. I want you to know 102 00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 1: how proud I am of you. You're serving the world, 103 00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 1: You're you know, you keep going, don't stop. You're you're 104 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:29,520 Speaker 1: doing exactly what you need to be doing, or doing 105 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:32,280 Speaker 1: God's work. And she didn't necessarily know, but this was 106 00:05:32,320 --> 00:05:35,640 Speaker 1: at moments when I'd be out traveling or really stressed 107 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:38,760 Speaker 1: out or struggling, and then right there her words would 108 00:05:38,760 --> 00:05:41,080 Speaker 1: come to me in a text message. Those are the 109 00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:44,800 Speaker 1: kinds of friendships that you can't manufacture. There, They're a gift. 110 00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:47,280 Speaker 1: They're a gift that you're given. You have to nurture them. 111 00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:51,159 Speaker 6: And those moments too, right moment people just you're thinking 112 00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:53,920 Speaker 6: about someone or you just need it, and without words, 113 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:56,600 Speaker 6: they know and you get that. It really is like 114 00:05:56,640 --> 00:05:59,640 Speaker 6: a kiss from the ethers as well. I like that 115 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:04,440 Speaker 6: And what it also resonates with me the fact of 116 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:08,360 Speaker 6: stepping into something with all of these preconceived notions. For us, 117 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:11,680 Speaker 6: it is the work of the king legacy, and you know, 118 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:14,039 Speaker 6: the building of the beloved community, and how do you 119 00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:17,400 Speaker 6: keep the integrity of that but still do it in 120 00:06:17,440 --> 00:06:20,240 Speaker 6: your own way and your own voice and for this generation. 121 00:06:20,360 --> 00:06:22,280 Speaker 6: And I think that's something that both of you all 122 00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:25,359 Speaker 6: have done so brilliantly. And Tara, I know that you 123 00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:28,280 Speaker 6: and Gabby met when she was literally at the beginning 124 00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:31,880 Speaker 6: of her spiritual journey. What stood out about her to 125 00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:35,839 Speaker 6: you in the early days before her best selling books 126 00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:38,880 Speaker 6: and before you know, all of this worldwide fame. 127 00:06:39,760 --> 00:06:44,640 Speaker 7: Oh my gosh, yeah, I see Gabby's you know, whenever 128 00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:47,839 Speaker 7: you walk around the street with her, whether somebody knows 129 00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:49,920 Speaker 7: her from her books or just sees her. 130 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:53,240 Speaker 3: She's always kind of coaching and helping and cheering people on. 131 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:54,880 Speaker 7: She's doing that all the time. 132 00:06:55,480 --> 00:06:57,920 Speaker 3: And you know, back when we were sort of stumping 133 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:00,960 Speaker 3: around New York City trying to figure this out and 134 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:04,880 Speaker 3: help people, she was doing that. So that's the same Gabby, 135 00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:08,000 Speaker 3: that same spirit, and I felt very similar. I mean, 136 00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:11,160 Speaker 3: we came up before social media. If we had something 137 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:12,960 Speaker 3: we wanted to share with the world, we literally wrote 138 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,920 Speaker 3: down a flyer, posted it up in the East village, 139 00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:18,160 Speaker 3: stepped a few steps back and said, does anybody care 140 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:21,400 Speaker 3: about this? Does anybody want to get together to connect 141 00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:22,160 Speaker 3: with themselves? 142 00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:24,160 Speaker 7: You know, Gabby was doing it in. 143 00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:26,720 Speaker 3: These beautiful ways that I was so impressed with, just 144 00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:30,080 Speaker 3: sitting people down in chairs and talking to them about things, 145 00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:33,000 Speaker 3: and to me, that was so courageous. I did it, 146 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,800 Speaker 3: of course, with yoga mats and help people get into 147 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,640 Speaker 3: their bodies and connect and feel. And then we would 148 00:07:37,720 --> 00:07:40,239 Speaker 3: chitchat it for a little bit afterwards, but we kept 149 00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:43,800 Speaker 3: circling around and finding each other and cheering each other on. 150 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:46,920 Speaker 3: And I think at that time too, we both got 151 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:50,080 Speaker 3: these special gifts. Just like today being around the incredible 152 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:52,280 Speaker 3: people you are, we both got to meet deep Buck 153 00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:53,400 Speaker 3: Chopra and Jane Fondon. 154 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:55,120 Speaker 7: Gabby was all of a sudden. 155 00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:57,560 Speaker 3: Oprah was scooping her up and putting her in you know, 156 00:07:57,640 --> 00:08:00,000 Speaker 3: really cool things and these wonderful people. 157 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,240 Speaker 7: Of course they boosted our careers, but they gave us 158 00:08:03,320 --> 00:08:07,000 Speaker 7: this emotional courage to stay connected with each other. 159 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:09,040 Speaker 3: And they kept telling us, you know, sort of behind 160 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:13,400 Speaker 3: the scenes, keep going, stay connected with yourself, keep learning 161 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:16,760 Speaker 3: new things, keep improving what you're doing, but keep going 162 00:08:16,840 --> 00:08:18,360 Speaker 3: and stay with each other. 163 00:08:18,440 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 7: So I've just held. 164 00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:22,559 Speaker 3: On to Gabby in my whole life, and I feel 165 00:08:22,560 --> 00:08:25,720 Speaker 3: my whole life with yoga, life, with trying to do 166 00:08:25,800 --> 00:08:29,480 Speaker 3: these things and really help people, and she's, you know, 167 00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:31,040 Speaker 3: that root of the tree. 168 00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:31,560 Speaker 7: For me for sure. 169 00:08:32,320 --> 00:08:35,480 Speaker 4: You know, we've seen this incredible movement that you're creating 170 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,360 Speaker 4: collectively on places like Oprah, Deepactobra and so forth, But 171 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:41,120 Speaker 4: it wasn't always that easy, and I want to honor 172 00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:45,480 Speaker 4: that part too. Gabby, you have gone through a remarkable transformation, 173 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:48,720 Speaker 4: and your transformational journey is nothing short to profound. 174 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:51,320 Speaker 8: Can you take us back to that time. 175 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:54,120 Speaker 4: And help our listeners and our viewers understand what that 176 00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:56,960 Speaker 4: transformation was like, because in your memoir. You were raw 177 00:08:57,200 --> 00:08:59,880 Speaker 4: and you were vulnerable, and you spoke about drug addiction 178 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:02,160 Speaker 4: and then I'll call addiction. You spoke about eating disorders, 179 00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:05,320 Speaker 4: you spoke about self loathing. What was that moment of 180 00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:08,920 Speaker 4: like hitting that rock bottom that made you change your 181 00:09:08,920 --> 00:09:11,280 Speaker 4: perspective as saying I need to have a different life. 182 00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:12,600 Speaker 8: Can you take us back to that moment? 183 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:16,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's actually a very timely conversation because we're 184 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:21,360 Speaker 1: entering into the fall and I'm coming up on twenty 185 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:28,280 Speaker 1: years of sobriety in October. Yes. Yes, And that commitment 186 00:09:28,679 --> 00:09:32,040 Speaker 1: to get clean and sober was not just a commitment 187 00:09:32,600 --> 00:09:34,640 Speaker 1: to a life of sobriety, but it was a commitment 188 00:09:34,679 --> 00:09:38,200 Speaker 1: to a spiritual life. It was a commitment to becoming 189 00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:44,080 Speaker 1: a teacher, to stepping into a higher purpose that I 190 00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:47,160 Speaker 1: chose the day October second of two thousand and five 191 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:50,320 Speaker 1: when I made the choice to get clean and sober, 192 00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:52,160 Speaker 1: I not only chose a life of sobriety, but I 193 00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:57,760 Speaker 1: chose a life of service. That choice was always in 194 00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:00,360 Speaker 1: front of me. So there was a peer in my 195 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:03,160 Speaker 1: life when I was really struggling towards the end of 196 00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 1: my addiction, and I went and I got a psychic 197 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:09,320 Speaker 1: geting with someone that my mom referred me to, and 198 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:12,120 Speaker 1: the psychic kept saying to me over and over, you're 199 00:10:12,160 --> 00:10:15,800 Speaker 1: struggling with addiction. And I would listen to this cassette 200 00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:18,280 Speaker 1: tape back over and over, listening to her voice. It 201 00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:21,080 Speaker 1: might beat up Toyota Corolla and I'd be doing the 202 00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:23,160 Speaker 1: alternate side of the street parking in New York City 203 00:10:23,160 --> 00:10:25,880 Speaker 1: and I'd listen to this cassette tape over and over 204 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:28,600 Speaker 1: while I waited for the parking to change over, and 205 00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,160 Speaker 1: I remember hearing her voice saying, you're struggling with addiction, 206 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:35,560 Speaker 1: and my voice quivering on the other end, saying, well, 207 00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:38,280 Speaker 1: it's not that bad. And then she went on and 208 00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:40,760 Speaker 1: she said, well, you have two choices in this lifetime. 209 00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:43,200 Speaker 1: You can stay on the path that you're on and 210 00:10:43,240 --> 00:10:46,560 Speaker 1: it will be very difficult, or you can get clean 211 00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:51,040 Speaker 1: and make a major impact on the world. And I 212 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:53,680 Speaker 1: just remember listening to that over and over and over 213 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:59,280 Speaker 1: and being in such a precipice of making that choice. 214 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:01,880 Speaker 1: And I could have gone either way. And I know 215 00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:04,559 Speaker 1: that my soul, when I signed up to come to 216 00:11:05,160 --> 00:11:07,160 Speaker 1: this world at this time in this way, my soul 217 00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:08,880 Speaker 1: made that choice that my soul said, I'm going to 218 00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:12,480 Speaker 1: go through this journey of trauma and addiction and discomfort 219 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:16,080 Speaker 1: so that I can resurrect myself in this lifetime and 220 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:19,240 Speaker 1: live to tell what it means to transcend those fear 221 00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:23,520 Speaker 1: based worldly experiences and live in that light and that magnitude, 222 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:27,160 Speaker 1: And so I can reflect back now twenty years and 223 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:31,000 Speaker 1: just with so much joy and gratitude for the commitment 224 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,880 Speaker 1: and the choice that I made to get clean and sober, 225 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,520 Speaker 1: but most importantly for the commitment and the choice that 226 00:11:35,559 --> 00:11:38,440 Speaker 1: I've made every single day since to one day at 227 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:41,800 Speaker 1: a time just keep surrendering to a higher power, surrendering 228 00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:45,480 Speaker 1: to a spiritual practice, surrendering to a therapeutic journey, so 229 00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:47,560 Speaker 1: that I could just keep shining the crystal and get 230 00:11:47,559 --> 00:11:50,080 Speaker 1: to the place that I'm met now today, where I 231 00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:52,920 Speaker 1: feel very free, and I feel very clear, and I 232 00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:57,080 Speaker 1: feel very aligned and the most ready that I've ever 233 00:11:57,080 --> 00:11:59,120 Speaker 1: felt before to actually do the serface work that I'm 234 00:11:59,120 --> 00:11:59,720 Speaker 1: really here to do. 235 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:02,280 Speaker 4: Wow, Gabia, that first of all blown away. Collectively, we're 236 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:04,720 Speaker 4: all blown away sitting here. Lots of nods, lots of energy, 237 00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:08,160 Speaker 4: lots of love to you, But I understand. October second, 238 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:10,520 Speaker 4: two thousand and five was that date. But take us 239 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:12,840 Speaker 4: back to October first, two thousand and five. What did 240 00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:16,600 Speaker 4: you say to yourself, yes the day before, to say, 241 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:19,880 Speaker 4: I need to change because our listeners are viewers may 242 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:21,720 Speaker 4: be stuck on the other side of the road waiting 243 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:24,240 Speaker 4: for parking to change, listening to their version of the cassette. 244 00:12:24,280 --> 00:12:27,800 Speaker 8: And what came through to you to talk to your soul? 245 00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:30,960 Speaker 1: Now, at the time, I had a spiritual awareness. I 246 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:35,160 Speaker 1: was brought up very spiritual, and I had awareness of spirituality, 247 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:36,960 Speaker 1: but I'd really turned my back on it in my 248 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:40,520 Speaker 1: days of my addiction. And so that day when I 249 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:42,800 Speaker 1: was coming down from the drugs and the alcohol from 250 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:44,480 Speaker 1: the night before, and I'm sitting on my knees in 251 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:47,640 Speaker 1: my dirty, my dirty studio apartment in the West Village, 252 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:50,600 Speaker 1: and I'm on my knees and I said a prayer. 253 00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:51,960 Speaker 1: But at the time I didn't know who I was 254 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:55,760 Speaker 1: talking to. And I said, God, Universe, whoever's out there, 255 00:12:56,480 --> 00:13:01,720 Speaker 1: I need a miracle. And I heard a inner voice, 256 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:06,480 Speaker 1: a voice speaking to me through me, say get clean 257 00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:09,800 Speaker 1: and you will live a life beyond your wildest dreams. 258 00:13:10,559 --> 00:13:15,959 Speaker 1: And that voice was so undeniable that I made the 259 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:18,600 Speaker 1: choice that day to get my butt out the door, 260 00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:23,000 Speaker 1: walked into a twelve step room, sat amongst strangers who 261 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,400 Speaker 1: felt like brothers and sisters because we were all there 262 00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:28,960 Speaker 1: for the same reason, very different archetypes in one room, 263 00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:31,600 Speaker 1: all with the same intention, And I knew I'd found 264 00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:34,160 Speaker 1: my home, and I knew I'd found my path. That 265 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:37,800 Speaker 1: inner voice, that voice of wisdom, that voice of spiritual 266 00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:40,560 Speaker 1: console connection, is a voice that I rely on. It's 267 00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:42,640 Speaker 1: a voice that I've developed as a medium. It's a 268 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:45,320 Speaker 1: voice that I attuned to and that I listened to 269 00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:48,320 Speaker 1: and I allow guide my life to this day. But 270 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:50,880 Speaker 1: that was a real spiritual intervention that came through for 271 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,280 Speaker 1: me to put me on the right truck. 272 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:55,319 Speaker 8: Wow, thank you, Tara. 273 00:13:55,559 --> 00:13:59,280 Speaker 9: You've become one of the most influential and inspiring yoga 274 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:02,959 Speaker 9: instructors in the world. I know my wife loves you. 275 00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:08,120 Speaker 9: Early in your career. What's something you had to unlearn 276 00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:09,800 Speaker 9: to find your own voice? 277 00:14:10,679 --> 00:14:15,320 Speaker 3: I think the the one big thing that I'm continuing 278 00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:24,040 Speaker 3: to learn is to reject rigidity, dogma, stress, force, push 279 00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:27,800 Speaker 3: and struggle. And it's funny because when I come over 280 00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:30,160 Speaker 3: to Gabby's how she says, I lean lean on her 281 00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:32,240 Speaker 3: and do these things for her. But you know, I 282 00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:35,800 Speaker 3: think most of us that and you probably identify with 283 00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:37,840 Speaker 3: this as well. Most of us that try to teach something, 284 00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:40,840 Speaker 3: we need to do it for ourselves too. So I 285 00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:45,120 Speaker 3: lean on people so I can remember to soften myself 286 00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:48,520 Speaker 3: that rigidity I used to, you know, when I first 287 00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:50,320 Speaker 3: started out. You know, Gabby and I both got a 288 00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:52,960 Speaker 3: lot of you know, this rebel yoga kind of punk 289 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:58,880 Speaker 3: rock press, and we both identified abusers. 290 00:14:58,280 --> 00:15:01,520 Speaker 7: And control and a system. You know that you will 291 00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:03,200 Speaker 7: educate us on, and we try our. 292 00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:06,560 Speaker 3: Best to fight back and to call out things that 293 00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:08,480 Speaker 3: are bad out there. You know, there's plenty of bad 294 00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:11,000 Speaker 3: in the yoga community as well. But it took me 295 00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:13,880 Speaker 3: a long time to realize there's a lot of rigidity, 296 00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:19,040 Speaker 3: stress and tension and stuff in the inside that continues 297 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:22,160 Speaker 3: to need to be addressed with every single breath. So 298 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:25,680 Speaker 3: that's something that I've worked on the moment that identified 299 00:15:25,680 --> 00:15:29,040 Speaker 3: that the rigidity out there, the chaos and the violence 300 00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:32,080 Speaker 3: out there, is also in here, and we need that 301 00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:32,920 Speaker 3: inner peace. 302 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:34,920 Speaker 7: With every moment, every breath. 303 00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:37,920 Speaker 3: And that's something that I that gives me a voice, 304 00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:40,360 Speaker 3: that gives me something to talk about, to share about 305 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:43,800 Speaker 3: to practice and connect with that, that connection to the 306 00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:45,840 Speaker 3: choice and the action of softness. 307 00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:51,160 Speaker 6: That the idea of softness, the idea I think a 308 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:54,840 Speaker 6: lot about the idea of power versus force, you know, 309 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:58,120 Speaker 6: in this world where it's so forceful, but there is 310 00:15:58,160 --> 00:16:04,240 Speaker 6: a true power in that softness as well. Yeah, and 311 00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:08,040 Speaker 6: I know all three of us are mothers, and I 312 00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:11,680 Speaker 6: don't know for you all. We have a seventeen year 313 00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:16,360 Speaker 6: old daughter starting her senior year of high school. And 314 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:20,160 Speaker 6: for me, as someone that has been a seeker and 315 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:24,560 Speaker 6: on spiritual journeys for so long, there is nothing like 316 00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:31,560 Speaker 6: motherhood that will try your spirituality on every level. Gabby, 317 00:16:31,720 --> 00:16:35,280 Speaker 6: as a mother, what has surprised you the most? 318 00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:43,000 Speaker 1: Being a mother is a very humbling experience because you 319 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:46,000 Speaker 1: think you've learned all these great personal development tools. 320 00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:49,600 Speaker 10: You know, you write the books about it, you get 321 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:52,120 Speaker 10: on the stage and you give lots of talks, and 322 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 10: then you enter your home with your six year old 323 00:16:54,360 --> 00:17:00,920 Speaker 10: and you realize how little you know and how much 324 00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:04,800 Speaker 10: growth and opportunity there is every single day, in every 325 00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:09,440 Speaker 10: waking moment with your child. So for me, I remember 326 00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:13,960 Speaker 10: making the decision to really be a student with my 327 00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:15,600 Speaker 10: kid and let my kid be my guru. 328 00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:18,199 Speaker 1: I remember the day that my child was born. I 329 00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:21,040 Speaker 1: got a text message from doctor Shefali, who's a tremendous 330 00:17:21,359 --> 00:17:25,640 Speaker 1: therapist and particularly in the space of parenting, and she said, 331 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,800 Speaker 1: welcome to the world, your new guru. And she couldn't 332 00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:32,520 Speaker 1: have been more accurate, because the choices that I'm making 333 00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:36,760 Speaker 1: as a parent are spiritually guided choices. And well, I 334 00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:41,359 Speaker 1: may be leaning into specific therapeutic practices and philosophies that 335 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:45,920 Speaker 1: have transformed my relationship with my child, they're spiritually led 336 00:17:46,359 --> 00:17:49,879 Speaker 1: because there's moments where I remember, at different stages of 337 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,160 Speaker 1: his development, I've been on my knees like what do 338 00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:56,720 Speaker 1: I do here? And then this beautiful message would come 339 00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:59,119 Speaker 1: through a podcast or I would get a text from 340 00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:02,080 Speaker 1: a friend who's this child psychologists. So I feel that 341 00:18:02,119 --> 00:18:05,160 Speaker 1: guidance and that wisdom always around me and I use it. 342 00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:08,160 Speaker 1: I use it, I ask and I and it's given 343 00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:11,560 Speaker 1: and I show up for it. The more foundational knowledge 344 00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:14,199 Speaker 1: I get, and the more humble I am that I 345 00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:17,320 Speaker 1: do not know the answers, and the more teachable I am, 346 00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:20,320 Speaker 1: the easier it is for me to navigate parenting. Because 347 00:18:20,640 --> 00:18:23,879 Speaker 1: there's there's there's real truth in the psychology of a 348 00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:27,399 Speaker 1: child and the psychology of the parent child dynamic and 349 00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:31,120 Speaker 1: to be able to create that that's that's that calm 350 00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:34,959 Speaker 1: and that stability and that self led energy. And I'm 351 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,080 Speaker 1: also while I'm a spiritual teacher, I'm also I'm also 352 00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:40,440 Speaker 1: trained in a therapy called internal family Systems therapy, which 353 00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:43,600 Speaker 1: is all about healing the inner children inside of us. 354 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:47,240 Speaker 1: And so the greatest gift I've given my child is 355 00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:51,919 Speaker 1: the devotional practice of my inner child healing. Because the 356 00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:54,600 Speaker 1: more I heal the burden parts of myself, the more 357 00:18:54,680 --> 00:18:57,840 Speaker 1: access I have to my inner parent, that self energy 358 00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:02,439 Speaker 1: of compassion and calm and clarity and connectedness. And in 359 00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:06,119 Speaker 1: that energy I can be a great stable force for 360 00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:10,080 Speaker 1: him to coregulate with. So it's a balance of being 361 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,960 Speaker 1: humble and doing the therapeutic work to be a parent, but 362 00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:16,960 Speaker 1: also the inner work to repaarent myself so that I 363 00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,439 Speaker 1: can show up with the greatest energy. 364 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:22,840 Speaker 6: And let me just say that the older they get, 365 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,160 Speaker 6: I always say that being a mother is like literally 366 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:29,200 Speaker 6: putting taking your heart and putting it outside your body. 367 00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:31,280 Speaker 4: And the older they get, the more of a guru 368 00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:33,919 Speaker 4: they become, the better teachers they become right. 369 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:34,840 Speaker 6: It depends on the. 370 00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:40,760 Speaker 1: Time seventeen year old girl I was like exactly. 371 00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:46,440 Speaker 2: Exactly exactly coming up the childhood memory that nearly broke 372 00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:49,320 Speaker 2: Gabby Bernstein, how facing it led her to the most 373 00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:51,200 Speaker 2: powerful way she could show up as a mother. 374 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,320 Speaker 6: Now back to my legacy. 375 00:19:56,880 --> 00:20:01,280 Speaker 5: I love the idea that it's both archchildren and candiate 376 00:20:01,320 --> 00:20:03,480 Speaker 5: our life partners, the relationships we have that are a 377 00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:06,600 Speaker 5: gurus in our lives, like I've learned, like we've been lucky. 378 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:09,320 Speaker 5: In this podcast, we sit down with Deepak Choprah, Gavera Mitte, 379 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:12,480 Speaker 5: all these great people, which is incredible wisdom, present company 380 00:20:12,560 --> 00:20:15,919 Speaker 5: very much included. But it is our relationships. It's the 381 00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:18,520 Speaker 5: people closest in our life is holding our child or children, 382 00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:21,879 Speaker 5: it's our loved ones. And so if Gaby I could ask, 383 00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:25,000 Speaker 5: as you reflect on your child as your guru, or 384 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:28,879 Speaker 5: reflect on those relationships closest to you, what have those 385 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 5: connections taught you that no traditional spiritual practice, no dogmatic 386 00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:39,040 Speaker 5: spiritual practice to already use your words, ever, could I think. 387 00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:42,840 Speaker 1: That the people that we choose to be in relationship with, 388 00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:47,840 Speaker 1: particular romantic partners often are a reflection of our own 389 00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:54,679 Speaker 1: shadow parts. So they can be at times a false 390 00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:57,560 Speaker 1: match for the parts of ourselves that we may feel 391 00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:00,960 Speaker 1: are incomplete, and then when you come together with those partners, 392 00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:04,960 Speaker 1: those incomplete parts can be activated. And the beauty of 393 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,360 Speaker 1: that is that if you are in a partnership where 394 00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:09,760 Speaker 1: there's a choice, once again, let's use the word choice, 395 00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:13,359 Speaker 1: to grow together, and to heal together, and to develop together, 396 00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:18,199 Speaker 1: you can together allow those triggered sparks that happen in 397 00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:24,280 Speaker 1: the relationship be your greatest learning device. So for myself 398 00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:27,000 Speaker 1: and my husband, we've had the willingness to be the 399 00:21:27,040 --> 00:21:29,919 Speaker 1: witness of the ways that we can activate those younger 400 00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,800 Speaker 1: wounded parts of ourselves and then together join and healing. 401 00:21:34,359 --> 00:21:36,840 Speaker 1: And I'm really quite one of the things I'm most 402 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:39,080 Speaker 1: proud of in my life actually is the therapeutic work 403 00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:41,600 Speaker 1: I've done with my husband, which has been very very 404 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:47,480 Speaker 1: spiritual work, but very devotional work of staying in it 405 00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:52,600 Speaker 1: even in the hard moments, staying committed, even when everything 406 00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:55,920 Speaker 1: seems like it's breaking down, because like I said earlier, 407 00:21:56,640 --> 00:22:00,960 Speaker 1: our wounded parts of ourselves oftentimes have these false pretenses 408 00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:04,719 Speaker 1: that some other human can be the source of healing, 409 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,560 Speaker 1: that someone outside of us can fill that hole. When 410 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:09,480 Speaker 1: we really find that we come together with the partner 411 00:22:09,520 --> 00:22:12,480 Speaker 1: that's going to actually activate those parts the most so 412 00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:15,080 Speaker 1: that the hole can be filled through the greater healing. 413 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,000 Speaker 1: And that, for me has been my experience. It's been 414 00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:22,200 Speaker 1: not about filling a hole, but actually filling that energy 415 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:29,360 Speaker 1: together through collective healing and through witnessing and through the 416 00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:34,159 Speaker 1: It's almost like you tighttright in and come out a 417 00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:35,879 Speaker 1: little bit in and a little bit out, so that 418 00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:37,840 Speaker 1: you're not just ripping off the band aid all at once, 419 00:22:38,040 --> 00:22:40,960 Speaker 1: but you're allowing the collective healing to happen over time, 420 00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:43,240 Speaker 1: and then you wake up one day and you're like, wow, 421 00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:47,520 Speaker 1: we're new, We're in a different place. This is a miracle. 422 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:50,520 Speaker 1: So if you can look at your relationships through that lens, 423 00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:52,560 Speaker 1: whether it be a marriage, whether it be a business partnership, 424 00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:54,600 Speaker 1: whether it be a child, and instead of saying this 425 00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:57,240 Speaker 1: is such a difficult relationship, I can't stand this, look 426 00:22:57,280 --> 00:22:59,760 Speaker 1: at the difficult relationships or the difficult moments in your 427 00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:02,040 Speaker 1: life and say thank you for being my greatest learning 428 00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:04,600 Speaker 1: device and then show up for it. 429 00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:10,639 Speaker 6: Gabby, I want to talk a little bit about you 430 00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:16,280 Speaker 6: just mentioned healing, the collective healing, but I want to 431 00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:20,760 Speaker 6: turn to your childhood and something devastating that you didn't 432 00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:26,680 Speaker 6: remember until thirty years later. I too was molested as 433 00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:30,879 Speaker 6: a child, and so I know that path of healing, 434 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:35,920 Speaker 6: even though we're all so unique in individuals and our 435 00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:41,600 Speaker 6: paths are unique. But your memories of being molested as 436 00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:45,680 Speaker 6: a child came flooding back to you doing a therapy session, right, 437 00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:50,960 Speaker 6: So what shifted for you in those sessions to allow 438 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:52,920 Speaker 6: that memory to come back. 439 00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:55,800 Speaker 1: Well, it was around the time I was thirty six 440 00:23:55,880 --> 00:23:59,320 Speaker 1: years old and I was newly married. My husband had 441 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:02,439 Speaker 1: left his job of a decade to come work with me. 442 00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:05,240 Speaker 1: A lot of the sort of structural things that were 443 00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:08,040 Speaker 1: holding things together were being dismantled, and so there was 444 00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:10,240 Speaker 1: a little bit of a shakiness in my life. And 445 00:24:10,240 --> 00:24:13,080 Speaker 1: I remember the months leading up to remembering, I kept 446 00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:16,359 Speaker 1: saying this mantra over and over, I can't go on 447 00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:19,720 Speaker 1: like this. And I was having these mental breakdowns, and 448 00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:23,680 Speaker 1: I was having numbness in my body and these gastrointestinal 449 00:24:23,760 --> 00:24:27,439 Speaker 1: issues and just panic attacks and just night sweats and 450 00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:33,320 Speaker 1: just consistent somatic signs of chaos. But I couldn't really 451 00:24:33,359 --> 00:24:35,960 Speaker 1: put my finger on it. And then I had a dream, 452 00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:40,080 Speaker 1: and in the dream, I remembered the sexual abuse from 453 00:24:40,119 --> 00:24:44,080 Speaker 1: my childhood. I woke up that morning with such a 454 00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:48,560 Speaker 1: strong knowing not, oh wow, that was a terrible dream, 455 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:53,480 Speaker 1: but that is real. That is real. That has been 456 00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:56,399 Speaker 1: given to me as a reminder. But it was so 457 00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,760 Speaker 1: terrifying and re traumatizing that I just pushed it down 458 00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:02,359 Speaker 1: and just let's say, let's lock that back up. And 459 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:04,880 Speaker 1: a week later, I was in my therapy and on 460 00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:09,240 Speaker 1: my therapist sofa, lying down. She just asked one question 461 00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:13,960 Speaker 1: that just reactivated and triggered me to fully embrace and 462 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:20,520 Speaker 1: accept that memory. And that moment was the most terrifying 463 00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:25,320 Speaker 1: moment and the most relieving moment at the same time. 464 00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:29,960 Speaker 1: The terror of accepting an exiled memory that I had 465 00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:34,360 Speaker 1: dissociated from and pushed down and numbed out for decades, 466 00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:39,480 Speaker 1: but the relief simultaneously of recognizing that's why I was 467 00:25:39,480 --> 00:25:42,920 Speaker 1: a drug addict, That's why I was a workaholic. That's 468 00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,920 Speaker 1: why I'm hypervigil at. That's why I have an anxiety disorder. 469 00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:49,080 Speaker 1: That's why I have chronic gastrone testinal issues. That's why, 470 00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:50,960 Speaker 1: that's why, that's why, that's why, that's which is all 471 00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:55,439 Speaker 1: the answers just flooding in for me, that moment was 472 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,480 Speaker 1: so so scary. And it was actually at a time 473 00:25:58,920 --> 00:26:01,679 Speaker 1: when I wrote my most profound work, which is my 474 00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:04,439 Speaker 1: book The Universe Has Your Back. I would wake up 475 00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:08,320 Speaker 1: every day in complete terror because I was reactivated into 476 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,199 Speaker 1: the trauma and I didn't really it was on a 477 00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:12,359 Speaker 1: big trauma journey to uncover this and to heal, but 478 00:26:12,359 --> 00:26:14,720 Speaker 1: it took a long time. So it was sort of 479 00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:18,879 Speaker 1: catapulted out of my body and very much re traumatized 480 00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:22,000 Speaker 1: by remembering this. And the only thing I had at 481 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,240 Speaker 1: that time as an anchor was my writing. So I'd 482 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:26,359 Speaker 1: wake up every day with these pangs of anxiety, and 483 00:26:26,359 --> 00:26:28,160 Speaker 1: I'd go up to my little office at the time, 484 00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:31,119 Speaker 1: and it was this whitewashed room with these white floors 485 00:26:31,119 --> 00:26:33,240 Speaker 1: and this white ceiling, and I'd sit at this little 486 00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:35,640 Speaker 1: desk and I just kept writing and writing and writing. 487 00:26:35,960 --> 00:26:39,280 Speaker 1: And I wrote that book to heal myself. That's why 488 00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:41,280 Speaker 1: I know that that book is the one that through 489 00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:43,080 Speaker 1: all throughout the world, if I meet people in any 490 00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:45,840 Speaker 1: country and any airport, they read The Universe Has Your 491 00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:50,280 Speaker 1: Back and the Why because it healed me and in 492 00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:52,600 Speaker 1: the healing transmission that that book gave me, that it 493 00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:59,040 Speaker 1: healed others. And so the memory, once again, while horrific 494 00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:00,119 Speaker 1: as it was, and it was probably the it was 495 00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:02,840 Speaker 1: a difficult time of my life, was the most important time 496 00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,960 Speaker 1: of my life because it was a rebirthing. It was 497 00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:08,639 Speaker 1: a time of saying, this is the lowest that we 498 00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:10,240 Speaker 1: can be. Let's get back up from here. 499 00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:16,520 Speaker 6: That story and your process reminds me sometimes as Rumy says, 500 00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:19,280 Speaker 6: are the lightest where our wounds. 501 00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:22,760 Speaker 1: The wound is the place where the light enters exactly. 502 00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:26,720 Speaker 6: And what that also brings up or remembering for me 503 00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:31,160 Speaker 6: is that so many times when my father in law, 504 00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:34,120 Speaker 6: when your father was at some of his lowest moments, 505 00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:37,640 Speaker 6: he would literally go up and preach himself out of 506 00:27:37,680 --> 00:27:40,880 Speaker 6: being in despair, depression or you know, so you go 507 00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:44,080 Speaker 6: and you think or you see, some of his greatest 508 00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:49,840 Speaker 6: speeches was because he was at his lowest emotionally. And 509 00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:53,800 Speaker 6: it seems that you were writing yourself through your healing 510 00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:55,760 Speaker 6: and taking so many others with you. 511 00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:00,800 Speaker 5: Scrolling won't change your life, but subscribing just might tap 512 00:28:00,840 --> 00:28:06,880 Speaker 5: that button and stay connected to conversations that can't. Now 513 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,240 Speaker 5: back to my legacy, Gabby. 514 00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:12,439 Speaker 4: On that journey you have spoken about how somebody we're 515 00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:13,879 Speaker 4: a big fan of as well, and I want to 516 00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:15,680 Speaker 4: give him the love that he deserves. 517 00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:18,800 Speaker 8: Here, Gabor Matte helped. 518 00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:21,280 Speaker 4: You, and I really want to encourage people to read 519 00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:22,879 Speaker 4: some of his books at some point. The myth of 520 00:28:22,920 --> 00:28:26,440 Speaker 4: normal when the body says no. These are incredible seminal 521 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,639 Speaker 4: works in my mind in terms of people going on 522 00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:32,480 Speaker 4: their own healing journey, and for those who do not 523 00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:37,000 Speaker 4: fully understand or maybe not fully appreciate the connection between 524 00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:40,880 Speaker 4: childhood wounds. So as you were as a child, what 525 00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,960 Speaker 4: happened to you traumatic events as a child, and how 526 00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:46,280 Speaker 4: you are now conducting yourself as an adult in terms 527 00:28:46,280 --> 00:28:48,960 Speaker 4: of adult behaviors. Help us understand that connection. 528 00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:53,640 Speaker 1: I'll speak to it from the work of also internal 529 00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:55,720 Speaker 1: family systems therapy, which is another guide of mine, which 530 00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:57,920 Speaker 1: is doctor Richard Schwortz. So I highly recommend you guys 531 00:28:57,920 --> 00:29:00,280 Speaker 1: bring on the show. I'll introduce you to Dick uh 532 00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:04,040 Speaker 1: So So Richard Towards, a brother and contemporary of Gobramante 533 00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:08,120 Speaker 1: and Peter Levine, and they all kind of collectively heal 534 00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:12,840 Speaker 1: these these incredible soul teachers, these men and women uh 535 00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:17,680 Speaker 1: and and from an IFS perspective, the the traumatized moment 536 00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:22,560 Speaker 1: was a moment from a spiritual place. We can quota 537 00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:26,120 Speaker 1: course in miracles. It's from the descent from magnitude to littleness. 538 00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:29,680 Speaker 1: It's it's when when when we forgot to laugh. And 539 00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:35,240 Speaker 1: it's these moments when when our little child brain gets 540 00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:39,000 Speaker 1: the memo that there is terror, that there is fear, 541 00:29:39,160 --> 00:29:42,959 Speaker 1: that there is extreme circumstances, that we are not safe, 542 00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:44,920 Speaker 1: that we are alone, that we are unlovable, that we 543 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:48,040 Speaker 1: are inadequate, and as little children, our brains do not 544 00:29:48,120 --> 00:29:52,360 Speaker 1: have the capacity to process those big emotions so very quickly. 545 00:29:52,360 --> 00:29:55,360 Speaker 1: What we do is we exile those feelings and beliefs 546 00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:57,440 Speaker 1: and we push them down, we lock them up, and 547 00:29:57,480 --> 00:29:59,920 Speaker 1: these are what an i f S are called exiled part. 548 00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:02,560 Speaker 1: We say Nope, not going to deal with that, not 549 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:04,840 Speaker 1: going to touch that, and it's under lock and key. 550 00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:07,200 Speaker 1: And at a very very young age, even as an 551 00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:09,440 Speaker 1: infant or one year old, two year old three, we 552 00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:13,720 Speaker 1: start building up protection mechanisms which are called protector parts. 553 00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:17,160 Speaker 1: And so what do these protection mechanisms look like? They 554 00:30:17,160 --> 00:30:21,600 Speaker 1: look like maybe in my case, hypervigilance and control. Because 555 00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:23,840 Speaker 1: I was a little child that felt so out of 556 00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:26,680 Speaker 1: control that I was going to start controlling everything around 557 00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:29,240 Speaker 1: me to feel safe. Or it could look like the 558 00:30:29,320 --> 00:30:32,000 Speaker 1: child that feels so inadequate starts to become a people 559 00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:34,760 Speaker 1: pleaser because they feel like if I'm not loved unless 560 00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:38,240 Speaker 1: I'm pleasing, or the child that feels so in soo 561 00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:41,440 Speaker 1: much terror shuts down and numbs out and starts using 562 00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:45,560 Speaker 1: sugar or shows or games to just check out. And 563 00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:49,720 Speaker 1: these protection mechanisms never leave us. They become protector parts 564 00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:52,800 Speaker 1: that begin to run the show that is our life, 565 00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:56,480 Speaker 1: and we start to live as adults from protector part 566 00:30:56,520 --> 00:30:59,360 Speaker 1: to protector part to protector part. And if you think 567 00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:01,959 Speaker 1: all of us here on this call right now, if 568 00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,320 Speaker 1: you think about the parts of yourselves that are the 569 00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:07,600 Speaker 1: most extreme, or the parts of yourselves that you're often like, oh, 570 00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:09,800 Speaker 1: there it is again. It's a habit or a pattern 571 00:31:09,880 --> 00:31:12,960 Speaker 1: or belief that just won't go away. You know that's's 572 00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:15,520 Speaker 1: holding you back. And you think about those parts of 573 00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:19,040 Speaker 1: yourselves and you ask yourself, how long has this been around? 574 00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:23,640 Speaker 1: Likely you're going to say forever, as long as I 575 00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:27,360 Speaker 1: can remember, because we build up these protection mechanisms so 576 00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:30,080 Speaker 1: that we never have to face the impermissible feelings of 577 00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:34,840 Speaker 1: those traumas, and so the genuine healing, the real root 578 00:31:34,920 --> 00:31:40,280 Speaker 1: cause healing, begins by healing and befriending these protection mechanisms 579 00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:45,360 Speaker 1: and softening to them, like Tera might say, softening, just 580 00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:50,680 Speaker 1: gently softening into these protection mechanisms, getting into relationship with them, 581 00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:53,320 Speaker 1: as we were talking about earlier. Those are the inner children, 582 00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:58,320 Speaker 1: These innered children that are just working on overdrive to 583 00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:03,480 Speaker 1: protect us from having to feel that inciting incident of trauma. 584 00:32:03,520 --> 00:32:06,160 Speaker 4: So keby when somebody comes to you, taking that knowledge 585 00:32:06,320 --> 00:32:10,080 Speaker 4: of somebody being in survival mode, they're disconnected there on 586 00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:13,840 Speaker 4: edges that are reactive, reactive, whatever that might be. What's 587 00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:15,880 Speaker 4: the first thing they needed to do. What's the first 588 00:32:15,920 --> 00:32:17,400 Speaker 4: thing that you would tell them to do? 589 00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:20,320 Speaker 1: Okay, so I would first tell them to choose to 590 00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:24,440 Speaker 1: check in instead of check out, so in my presence 591 00:32:24,560 --> 00:32:27,400 Speaker 1: or even in a safe environment for themselves to focus 592 00:32:27,440 --> 00:32:31,000 Speaker 1: their attention inward. Because our knee jerk reaction is I 593 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:32,720 Speaker 1: don't want to feel this. I'm going to go run 594 00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:35,120 Speaker 1: to the refrigerator. I'm going to go numb out on YouTube. 595 00:32:35,120 --> 00:32:36,959 Speaker 1: I'm going to go pick up that drink. I'm going 596 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:40,160 Speaker 1: to run instead of running and checking out check in. 597 00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:43,560 Speaker 1: That's step one, and so you focus your attention inward. 598 00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:46,760 Speaker 1: And then the second step is to become curious, just 599 00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:51,840 Speaker 1: offering some curiosity inside and noticing where does this feeling 600 00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:55,200 Speaker 1: live in my body? And what do I know about it? 601 00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:58,240 Speaker 1: You know, are there any thoughts or sensations or images 602 00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:02,640 Speaker 1: or stories that come forward for me? And the third 603 00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:07,120 Speaker 1: step is compassionate connection. And that's when you'd ask yourself 604 00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:10,760 Speaker 1: or the part of you, what do you need? Asking 605 00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:13,600 Speaker 1: the little child inside of you, what do you need? 606 00:33:14,720 --> 00:33:16,880 Speaker 1: And if you go through those three steps in one 607 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:20,800 Speaker 1: minute or more, the fourth step is revealed. You might 608 00:33:20,920 --> 00:33:22,760 Speaker 1: check in, and you check in to the fourth step 609 00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:24,560 Speaker 1: and you say, well, how do I feel right now? 610 00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:28,400 Speaker 1: And you'll notice maybe I feel more calm, maybe I 611 00:33:28,440 --> 00:33:32,040 Speaker 1: feel more connected to that part of myself. Oftentimes people 612 00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:34,960 Speaker 1: will say I feel more compassion towards that part of myself. 613 00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:39,719 Speaker 1: And so these se qualities of compassion and calm and 614 00:33:39,760 --> 00:33:43,520 Speaker 1: connection and clarity and courage and confidence. This is what 615 00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:46,239 Speaker 1: in IFS is known as self with a capital S. 616 00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:49,160 Speaker 1: It's our spirit, It's the God within us, is the 617 00:33:49,200 --> 00:33:52,200 Speaker 1: internal parent within us, is the internal teacher, the inner 618 00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:57,680 Speaker 1: healer inside. That true self is revealed when we help 619 00:33:57,760 --> 00:34:03,360 Speaker 1: these activated parts of ourselves calm and settle. There's a 620 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:07,000 Speaker 1: quick way of describing the process, but it's an internal 621 00:34:07,120 --> 00:34:08,680 Speaker 1: check in rather than check out. 622 00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:11,839 Speaker 8: Wow, thank you, so check in, check in, check in. 623 00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:16,120 Speaker 9: Tara, what was it like for you as her friend 624 00:34:16,840 --> 00:34:21,320 Speaker 9: watching her go through that realization and that pain. 625 00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:24,520 Speaker 3: I think it's such a gift to have a friend 626 00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:29,160 Speaker 3: who's willing to check in instead of check out the 627 00:34:29,160 --> 00:34:32,239 Speaker 3: thing around Gabby. If she has a crisis, that's an 628 00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:35,319 Speaker 3: exciting moment, you know, like she shared when she was 629 00:34:35,320 --> 00:34:39,000 Speaker 3: on her therapist couch, sharing that that's the goal, that's 630 00:34:39,040 --> 00:34:43,120 Speaker 3: the stuff that we're I'm comfortable there because I know 631 00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:47,040 Speaker 3: she's okay. She's not okay when she's checked out. None 632 00:34:47,080 --> 00:34:48,680 Speaker 3: of us are okay. When we're checked out. We kind 633 00:34:48,680 --> 00:34:51,719 Speaker 3: of appear okay to ourselves, to the world. We're holding on, 634 00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:55,200 Speaker 3: we're sort of getting by, we're doing the things. But 635 00:34:55,600 --> 00:34:59,399 Speaker 3: when we break down, when we're vulnerable. We all love 636 00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:01,319 Speaker 3: that about each each other. You know, when your best 637 00:35:01,320 --> 00:35:04,960 Speaker 3: friend calls and said, I've got this horrible problem. You know, 638 00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:06,840 Speaker 3: we don't really rush in and try to solve it. 639 00:35:06,880 --> 00:35:09,399 Speaker 3: We just we'd love to listen. We love to be there, 640 00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:12,120 Speaker 3: we love to connect and be together. So whenever Gabby 641 00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:14,560 Speaker 3: calls me and she's like, this is going on or 642 00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:16,279 Speaker 3: I can just you know, sometimes with your friends, you 643 00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:19,000 Speaker 3: just feel it intuitively, and I send her some other 644 00:35:19,080 --> 00:35:21,279 Speaker 3: random voice note about how much I love her. How 645 00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:24,759 Speaker 3: you know, I am so grateful that she is available 646 00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:29,440 Speaker 3: and is excited to dive into these situations. And it 647 00:35:29,440 --> 00:35:32,080 Speaker 3: gives other people permission. It gives me permission. You know, 648 00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:34,960 Speaker 3: I do this work too, But when you have a 649 00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:38,280 Speaker 3: friend that does it, you say, Okay, where's my next 650 00:35:38,880 --> 00:35:41,279 Speaker 3: fault line. I'm ready to fall apart again so I 651 00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:44,000 Speaker 3: can put myself back together. Because the more we allow 652 00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:46,400 Speaker 3: ourselves to do that, the stronger we become. 653 00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:51,040 Speaker 7: And I love that concept that softness is. 654 00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:55,799 Speaker 3: Power, and when we're relaxed and calm and soft, we 655 00:35:55,880 --> 00:35:58,279 Speaker 3: have so much more to give. When we're rigid and 656 00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:02,520 Speaker 3: stiff and protecting ourselves, we feel in control, but we're 657 00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:03,560 Speaker 3: really so. 658 00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:05,360 Speaker 7: Close to burning out, and we're not. 659 00:36:06,880 --> 00:36:10,080 Speaker 3: Going to be ever able to even reach our full potential, 660 00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:12,000 Speaker 3: even when we're sort of tricked into it by this 661 00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:15,399 Speaker 3: feeling of stress and struggle and accomplishment. So I get 662 00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:19,320 Speaker 3: excited whenever Gabby's having a moment because it allows allows 663 00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:21,160 Speaker 3: her to have a moment, allows me to have a moment, 664 00:36:21,239 --> 00:36:23,399 Speaker 3: and you know she's going to come back stronger and 665 00:36:24,160 --> 00:36:25,320 Speaker 3: so much more happens. 666 00:36:25,560 --> 00:36:29,759 Speaker 9: Wow, that's amazing, Yabby. How to Terror show up for 667 00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:32,480 Speaker 9: you in your toughest moments? 668 00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:35,960 Speaker 1: Well, I think that she continues to. I think that 669 00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:38,880 Speaker 1: that what Terror just said that's so beautiful is that 670 00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:41,880 Speaker 1: when I'm going through something difficult, it's an exciting moment. 671 00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:47,120 Speaker 1: I love that that way of perceiving one difficult moments 672 00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:50,520 Speaker 1: in general, but also my take on difficult moments because 673 00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:54,200 Speaker 1: for me, the critical moments in my life have been 674 00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:57,120 Speaker 1: like like you said earlier, the wound, where the plate light, 675 00:36:57,120 --> 00:37:02,080 Speaker 1: where the light enters, the breaking down to break through. 676 00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:05,920 Speaker 1: So it is those those moments that are the juicy 677 00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:08,760 Speaker 1: moments where you know you're on the precipice of another 678 00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:12,640 Speaker 1: up leveling or of a new experience. And so having 679 00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:18,719 Speaker 1: a friend that is a stable energy in your life, 680 00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:22,480 Speaker 1: who you know that you can rely on, who you 681 00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:25,719 Speaker 1: know is energetically there even when you're not speaking to them, 682 00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:28,960 Speaker 1: who you know will be a phone call away or 683 00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:34,320 Speaker 1: a ten minute drive away to lean on, to rely 684 00:37:34,440 --> 00:37:37,920 Speaker 1: on is one of the absolute most incredible gifts of 685 00:37:37,960 --> 00:37:41,600 Speaker 1: my lifetime having a friend like Tara. Having a friend 686 00:37:41,640 --> 00:37:45,920 Speaker 1: like that not only is so soothing to my nervous 687 00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:49,439 Speaker 1: system and I know that it is mutual, but it's 688 00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:53,920 Speaker 1: also this incredible reflection. You know, I really look at 689 00:37:54,160 --> 00:37:57,680 Speaker 1: the rise of our friendship and how close we've become 690 00:37:57,719 --> 00:37:59,719 Speaker 1: in the recent years, and I see it's such a 691 00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:03,600 Speaker 1: reflection of both where we both are. The devotional commitment 692 00:38:03,640 --> 00:38:07,120 Speaker 1: to service, the devotional commitment to spiritual development, the devotional 693 00:38:07,360 --> 00:38:10,719 Speaker 1: commitment to softening. To have a friend like that is 694 00:38:10,760 --> 00:38:13,360 Speaker 1: also a reflection of where you're at in your life. 695 00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:16,960 Speaker 1: The people that we surround ourselves with are a mirror 696 00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:20,279 Speaker 1: of who we are, and so to be able to 697 00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:23,160 Speaker 1: say this is my plus one today, guys, that's a 698 00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:26,280 Speaker 1: pat on my own back, right, that's a go girl. 699 00:38:26,480 --> 00:38:29,759 Speaker 1: You know I'm doing pretty good and that's my plus one. 700 00:38:30,960 --> 00:38:36,719 Speaker 4: You're both voices who inspire people to seek wellness, seek guidance, 701 00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:40,160 Speaker 4: and to truly protect their peace. Tara, what about you, 702 00:38:40,440 --> 00:38:42,720 Speaker 4: what do you do to protect your piece? 703 00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:46,200 Speaker 3: Oh? My goodness, Well, if it's all right with you? 704 00:38:46,239 --> 00:38:50,240 Speaker 3: Can I lead us through about a thirty second little 705 00:38:50,239 --> 00:38:52,120 Speaker 3: thing to experience inner piece. 706 00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:55,200 Speaker 7: Oh, thank you so much, wow, so grateful. 707 00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:59,160 Speaker 3: So you know, I think it's practiced, or at least 708 00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:01,520 Speaker 3: something to do these many things to do is have 709 00:39:01,719 --> 00:39:04,560 Speaker 3: a bit of a brief practice. So wherever you are 710 00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:08,280 Speaker 3: and where everybody at home is listening, finding a place 711 00:39:08,320 --> 00:39:13,040 Speaker 3: where you're actually comfortable. And something that yoga in Taichi 712 00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:17,520 Speaker 3: teaches us is to never suffer a bad position. So 713 00:39:17,640 --> 00:39:21,800 Speaker 3: if you can get more comfortable, simply do it. Don't 714 00:39:22,280 --> 00:39:24,880 Speaker 3: suffer here, So you can roll around a bit side 715 00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:27,960 Speaker 3: to side or easy for it and back. It can 716 00:39:28,040 --> 00:39:35,080 Speaker 3: be any direction that feels right for you, and simply, 717 00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:40,120 Speaker 3: like a tree responding to the breeze, allow yourself to 718 00:39:40,280 --> 00:39:49,920 Speaker 3: find that nice centered place and simply notice how you feel, 719 00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:53,800 Speaker 3: without trying to change or fix anything at all. Notice 720 00:39:53,800 --> 00:40:01,439 Speaker 3: what's going on with you right now, what's happening physically, mentally, emotionally, 721 00:40:03,640 --> 00:40:11,040 Speaker 3: simply noticed and let your whole self soften here. So first, 722 00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:13,760 Speaker 3: a bit movable, a bit of a bend in your 723 00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:18,279 Speaker 3: physical places, your joints, your knees, your elbows, your mechanical 724 00:40:18,360 --> 00:40:22,520 Speaker 3: body parts that keep us moving around and keep us 725 00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:31,160 Speaker 3: living our lives. And let your whole self soften that mental, emotional, enigmatic, 726 00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:36,720 Speaker 3: spiritual part of you, AH, your whole self everything together 727 00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:45,200 Speaker 3: AH soften here and simply notice what happens. Your breath 728 00:40:45,239 --> 00:40:47,440 Speaker 3: starting to move you, every inhale. 729 00:40:48,880 --> 00:40:50,920 Speaker 7: Expanding making more room. 730 00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:56,360 Speaker 3: And every exhale release relax moving you a bit inward 731 00:40:57,840 --> 00:41:00,520 Speaker 3: your breath, helping you be in harmony. 732 00:41:05,760 --> 00:41:07,440 Speaker 7: Simply notice how you feel. 733 00:41:10,120 --> 00:41:12,600 Speaker 3: And either eyes opened or closed, or to notice a 734 00:41:12,640 --> 00:41:15,560 Speaker 3: bit what's happening around you and how you relate to 735 00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:19,680 Speaker 3: your environment. If there's people around you, if there's objects 736 00:41:19,760 --> 00:41:24,360 Speaker 3: or animals, notice that you're a part of everything happening 737 00:41:24,360 --> 00:41:29,640 Speaker 3: around you. Coming back to simply noticing how you feel. 738 00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:39,600 Speaker 3: One more big breath together, big and hell long, excel 739 00:41:40,960 --> 00:41:49,000 Speaker 3: easy and that's simple. I think that's a simple way 740 00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:52,719 Speaker 3: to come back to that hopefully inner peace, or at 741 00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:56,560 Speaker 3: least noticing what's happening with us so we can make 742 00:41:56,600 --> 00:41:59,200 Speaker 3: a good choice to take better care and if they 743 00:41:59,200 --> 00:42:01,560 Speaker 3: can take better care of ourselves, we have a better 744 00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:04,359 Speaker 3: chance to use our gifts for good and use that 745 00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:05,200 Speaker 3: higher good. 746 00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:08,520 Speaker 8: Thank you, thank you, thank you. 747 00:42:08,800 --> 00:42:11,560 Speaker 6: What came to me is that so sometimes peace and 748 00:42:11,640 --> 00:42:13,440 Speaker 6: harmony is just a few breaths away. 749 00:42:15,120 --> 00:42:16,719 Speaker 7: So beautiful, beautiful. 750 00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:20,040 Speaker 5: It has been a lightening, beautiful conversation. The friendship that 751 00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:22,319 Speaker 5: you two have. I love how it dates back at 752 00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:27,120 Speaker 5: decades and just to reflect back subtly finding our daily prayer, 753 00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:34,680 Speaker 5: humbly surrendering and asking what miracles can we perform today? 754 00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:39,239 Speaker 5: Thank you both so much for your incredible wisdom and 755 00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:39,800 Speaker 5: life work. 756 00:42:40,800 --> 00:42:44,000 Speaker 1: Thank you, guys the beautiful, Thank you so much. 757 00:42:45,080 --> 00:42:49,640 Speaker 2: Thank you for joining us. If you enjoy today's conversation, subscribe, share, 758 00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:52,760 Speaker 2: and follow us on at my Legacy movement on social 759 00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:57,720 Speaker 2: media and YouTube. New episodes drop every Tuesday, with bonus 760 00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:03,560 Speaker 2: content every Thursday. This podcast honors doctor King's vision of 761 00:43:03,600 --> 00:43:07,520 Speaker 2: the beloved community and the power of connection. A Legacy 762 00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:12,320 Speaker 2: Plus Studio production distributed by iHeartMedia creator and executive producer 763 00:43:12,360 --> 00:43:16,200 Speaker 2: Suzanne Hayward come executive producer Lisa Lyle. Listen on the 764 00:43:16,239 --> 00:43:18,880 Speaker 2: iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.