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Speaker 1: Kitty misconnections. That was me staring. There's only two places

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Speaker 1: to find true love in this world. One is inside

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Speaker 1: the House of Mirrors with someone who looks exactly like me,

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Speaker 1: just with a long, wavy body, like loose spaghetti root

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Speaker 1: for them.

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Speaker 2: No root, cold hard lips. I love it.

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Speaker 1: The other is on the pages of craigslist dot org.

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Speaker 1: We scour that website every week to find the best

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Speaker 1: misconnections that they have to offer, like this one titled

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Speaker 1: Ridunculously Beautiful Babe at the ball game twenty seven, bleachers says.

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Speaker 2: You was the blonde hottie with a body sporting an

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Speaker 2: extra dark spray tan and sparkly pink baseball cap. I

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Speaker 2: was the red bearded fella sat non rows behind you.

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Speaker 2: The kept yelling woos, she's.

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Speaker 3: Not a, it's not like A. That's his meeting call.

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Speaker 1: I think he was cheering for the game.

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Speaker 3: Oh okay, I thought he was trying to get her attention.

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Speaker 2: We made eye contact right before the seventh in and stretch.

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Speaker 2: I winked at you with my black eye. If you

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Speaker 2: was wondering, I got it. When I accidentally need myself

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Speaker 2: in the face while doing an epic cannon ball in

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Speaker 2: to my cousin's jacuzzie. No water in it. Wait, I

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Speaker 2: think there's probably more resist It's still swollen, but not

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Speaker 2: too swollen to notice your sweet grass fed booty.

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Speaker 3: Alright.

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Speaker 2: I was surprised that you flirted back by blinking extra

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Speaker 2: slow and then licking your lower lip.

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Speaker 3: She's probably not even looking at it.

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Speaker 2: The rest of the rest of the game, I couldn't

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Speaker 2: take my eyes off you. I even saw you stare

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Speaker 2: at me while taking a big bite of a hot dog.

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Speaker 2: He was actually too big of a bite, because I

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Speaker 2: think you choked a tiny bit and gagged the rest

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Speaker 2: up into your friend's empty You're coosy the cool thing,

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Speaker 2: though we still hal that contact the entire time.

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Speaker 3: I actually feel like maybe they're meant for each other.

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Speaker 2: After that description, Sadly, I didn't have the guts to

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Speaker 2: follow you out in the stadium. Also, our team was

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Speaker 2: up by four runs and I didn't want to jink

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Speaker 2: some by leaving my seat. Hit me back, Dannimal the Canibal.

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Speaker 1: This next misconnection is titled the only crime You committed

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Speaker 1: is Theft of My Heart Awesome woman for Man twenty

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Speaker 1: nine Court.

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Speaker 3: Oh Court, there's the crime part.

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Speaker 2: I was jury number four at your trial for drug

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Speaker 2: possession criminal you were the sexy man with the neck

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Speaker 2: tattoo that said hard to love, easy to hate. I

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Speaker 2: didn't believe that.

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Speaker 1: For one second.

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Speaker 2: Player. Wow, if I'm being honest, I did notice that

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Speaker 2: your court appointed lawyer was doing his best to keep

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Speaker 2: you out of trouble.

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Speaker 3: Oh well, he got the right juror for that, because

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Speaker 3: I'm guessing she didn't put them in jail.

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Speaker 2: I actually thought you might get away with it until

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Speaker 2: the other side brought up the quote unquote indisputable video

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Speaker 2: evidence of you smoking crack and breaking into the electronics.

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Speaker 3: Star on video. You watch that and you still want? Then?

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Speaker 2: To make matters worse, they called four separate eyewitnesses to

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Speaker 2: the stand, and all four said that, without a doubt,

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Speaker 2: you were the mastermind at the crime scene.

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Speaker 1: I still thought you were innocent, though, and I held

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Speaker 1: out as long as I could in the jury room

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Speaker 1: until they promised bagels if we could wrap it up

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Speaker 1: by the weekend.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, not sorry, I'm a basic bagel bee.

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Speaker 3: Okays more important.

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Speaker 2: Side note, I didn't expect it, but I loved your

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Speaker 2: adorable outburst when they said you were guilty. Were you

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Speaker 2: were just doing that to show off for me. You're

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Speaker 2: so bad, give me a shout out in two to four,

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Speaker 2: depending on good behavior, I'll look out for you, naughtybl

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Speaker 2: That's signed Dur number four parentheses Chandra.

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Speaker 3: Good luck on Yeah.

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Speaker 1: This next misconnection is titled awkward First meeting Man for

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Speaker 1: Woman thirty two concert.

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Speaker 3: Ohto the awkward part? What happened?

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Speaker 2: I met you Saturday night at the DM show. You

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Speaker 2: were the burnett dressed as a rave kitten with a

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Speaker 2: pair of cat ears on your head.

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Speaker 3: She does not stand out at all.

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Speaker 2: So many of every girl rainbow whiskers painted on your cheeks.

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Speaker 3: Yay which one?

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Speaker 2: I was the shirtless, skinny male who was flipping out

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Speaker 2: because I thought my candy necklace had come alive and

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Speaker 2: with eating my face. Sorry, that was my first time

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Speaker 2: on Molly okay, yeah, or maybe it was the bud

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Speaker 2: light hitting me hard. We were gansing next to each

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Speaker 2: other and our shoulders were rubbing. That's when I told

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Speaker 2: you to throw me into the crowd. Is He spun

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Speaker 2: me around like I was a discussed at the side.

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Speaker 2: When I landed. It was unpleasant to say lease, A

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Speaker 2: security guard said it.

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Speaker 3: I looked like the.

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Speaker 2: Guy on a poster and handcuffed me. Oh twenty five

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Speaker 2: minutes later, I was pretend crying in a squad car,

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Speaker 2: screaming for my mom to pick me up. That was

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Speaker 2: just an act.

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Speaker 3: By the way, if you saw that, wasn't real.

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Speaker 2: Okay, the police officer said he felt sorry for me

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Speaker 2: and let me go. What a sucker. He totally fell

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Speaker 2: for it. Take that pig.

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Speaker 3: Is he actually the guy on the poster?

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Speaker 2: The last thing I remember is running towards a giant

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Speaker 2: inflatable Viking statue with green lights coming from his eyes.

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Speaker 2: I don't think I had that, but maybe I did

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Speaker 2: tell you we can hang out again. I told my

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Speaker 2: mom about you, and she thinks Rave Kitten is super cool.

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Speaker 3: That kid went hard at you want.

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Speaker 2: Some of you On Wednesday, my mom's street.

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Speaker 3: Day sounds amazing. Straight into it.

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Speaker 2: That's signed the coolest guy you'll ever meet, Stuart Hartman.

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Speaker 1: Those are your Craigslist misconnections. We got your phone tap

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Speaker 1: coming up and right after this