Speaker 1: Wind Down with Jane Kramer and I've Heeart Radio podcast.
Speaker 2: How's the stress level going by this week? Feeling good
Speaker 2: about things?
Speaker 3: My stress levels are actually good because I made the
Speaker 3: decision this week, Yeah, about what not take life too seriously.
Speaker 1: I feel like you've done so, like you're you feel different,
Speaker 1: you feel like you feel lighter. Well, just make it
Speaker 1: you seem lighter. I don't know how you feel.
Speaker 3: A conscious decision just to just not let things affect
Speaker 3: me so much, like comments, conversations, decisions. If things don't
Speaker 3: go quite as I want them to plan them, then
Speaker 3: it's fine. There's a reason for it. So I've just
Speaker 3: kind of had to not had to be chosen to
Speaker 3: take a step back and just relax a little bit,
Speaker 3: not relax as and get through less work, or but
Speaker 3: just be like, stop taking everything so so serious all
Speaker 3: the time, because it doesn't do me any good. I
Speaker 3: take things so seriously, I become irritable, defensive, reactive. But
Speaker 3: as if I just speak to myself and be like, yeah,
Speaker 3: your life's good things are happening.
Speaker 1: Just slow down, right, do you does it? Do you
Speaker 1: feel a difference?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I do?
Speaker 1: Actually yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, smile more.
Speaker 1: Again? Now just to defend you know, you a bit.
Speaker 2: It's just you have you have so much that you're
Speaker 2: doing and so much writing on certain things, and it's
Speaker 2: it can feel hard, right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, But I also become obsessed about things.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I do.
Speaker 3: I have an obsessive nature, so I must do this,
Speaker 3: I must do that, and and I forget to live essentially,
Speaker 3: and it's not nice. It's not nice for the people
Speaker 3: around you and the kids and Troy, and so it's just, yeah,
Speaker 3: just need to relax a little bit more and not
Speaker 3: take things so serious.
Speaker 2: But I think too though you've had I mean maybe
Speaker 2: you haven't, but in my mind it's it's almost like
Speaker 2: I think when people go through that, it's like you're
Speaker 2: the only person going through that, and you don't realize
Speaker 2: other people that have stresses and pressure. And so when
Speaker 2: I express something to the other day because I ended up,
Speaker 2: you know, turning down two things, and then I started
Speaker 2: to feel, oh my gosh, like.
Speaker 1: What am I doing?
Speaker 2: And then I'm like, I also have pressure too, and
Speaker 2: I have those feelings and thoughts. And I don't know
Speaker 2: if you sometimes because I try not to let everybody
Speaker 2: else feel it in a way, so I bet I
Speaker 2: feel like in that conversation you might have been able
Speaker 2: to hear like it's not like I also have those
Speaker 2: same feelings too, just I just expressed them differently.
Speaker 3: So you'll probably find that this week I held you
Speaker 3: a little bit more based on how my outlook was
Speaker 3: or not.
Speaker 2: What do you mean?
Speaker 3: So because of how I decided to approach this week
Speaker 3: with relaxing a little bit more and being a little
Speaker 3: bit more fun than not taking things serious, then I
Speaker 3: was in a better position to listen to you when
Speaker 3: you want to discuss the things that you had said
Speaker 3: no to and how you were feeling now.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're you're I think it's like that.
Speaker 1: I think when you'll be your present.
Speaker 3: Yeah, when you're an obsessive person, there's a there's unfortunately,
Speaker 3: there's a selfish trait in there. What do you Sometimes
Speaker 3: you think your problems are the.
Speaker 1: Only problems, right, and they're not.
Speaker 3: No, it's not, and it's it's not it's not a
Speaker 3: good mindset to have, and it's not place a good
Speaker 3: place to be in, which is why I needed to
Speaker 3: kick up they asked to get out of.
Speaker 2: Essentially, Oh, I'm glad, I'm happy for you. Then I
Speaker 2: wonder question for you in relationships, because sometimes when people
Speaker 2: aren't having sex, they might start to feel a little.
Speaker 1: Frustrated.
Speaker 2: Now, that has never really been our issue, but I
Speaker 2: was reading something where they say sometimes in relationships, when
Speaker 2: you're not getting your needs met, you start to get
Speaker 2: a little more irritable, a little more annoyed. Maybe what
Speaker 2: do you think the magic number is to being intimate
Speaker 2: and having sex.
Speaker 3: I think somewhere between two and three. I think two
Speaker 3: is minimal and three is good.
Speaker 1: A week or day I'm goodding, but a week a week, yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think I think that's healthy physically. Emotionally
Speaker 3: there's a good number, but not quite the case for
Speaker 3: a lot of relationships unfortunately.
Speaker 2: Well, I think it's hard. You know, everyone's so busy,
Speaker 2: especially if you have kids. Other factors into things. And
Speaker 2: I mean we're in a stage now where when we
Speaker 2: go to bed, I'm like, I'm tired. I just want
Speaker 2: if it's if it's past a certain point, like I'm done,
Speaker 2: I'm gone. Like if that's where it's like if we're
Speaker 2: in I feel like you kind of know me now too.
Speaker 2: If you don't get me on the front end of
Speaker 2: the movie, you're not getting me on the back end
Speaker 2: of the movie, which is not gonna happen.
Speaker 1: I'm exhausted, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3: You hear people get into you, hear couples that that
Speaker 3: actually schedule sex into the lives.
Speaker 2: But that's something that therapists say to do. If so
Speaker 2: that you it's like a date, they sexy time.
Speaker 3: Yeah, would you think that's intimate, that it's planned.
Speaker 2: That I know someone that does that, So I can't
Speaker 2: again that that works.
Speaker 1: For them, you know, judgment on anyone.
Speaker 2: Yeah, to me, I don't like that because to me,
Speaker 2: it adds more pressure and then it takes the To me,
Speaker 2: it adds more pressure scheduling, and it it makes it
Speaker 2: a little less sexy. Okay, So that's just my personal
Speaker 2: for me and how I operate. Yeah, but I know
Speaker 2: for other people it can either be exciting that they
Speaker 2: know every Monday is.
Speaker 1: Monday, Monday Funday.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then you know, for other people it's or
Speaker 2: it might make them feel pressured.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Yeah, I don't think we.
Speaker 2: I don't think we would ever get to a place
Speaker 2: where we feel like we'd have to schedule sex.
Speaker 3: No, how do you know when I want to sex you?
Speaker 1: I always know?
Speaker 2: How do you know, I feel like you'd have it
Speaker 2: every day if you could.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, we have a very healthy sex life.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I grateful for it, that's for sure.
Speaker 1: You give me a look, I give you a look.
Speaker 1: You give me a luck.
Speaker 2: Like the memes that you see the gorillas or the monkeys,
Speaker 2: all the.
Speaker 1: Things that you send me. The memes the gorillas are
Speaker 1: the best band.
Speaker 2: Questions who plans the vacations? Do you both match up
Speaker 2: on what you like your vacation to look like?
Speaker 3: That's a good question because a lot of a lot
Speaker 3: of our vacations are we've gone because they come through
Speaker 3: being offered, don't they.
Speaker 2: Well, I see where there are places that are offering
Speaker 2: three places.
Speaker 3: And then we make a decision based decision. Yeah, I
Speaker 3: think we're both pretty similar when it comes to the
Speaker 3: vacation needs only.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I planned our honeymoon honeyon. I planned
Speaker 2: our year wedding anniversary trip that's coming up. Very excited
Speaker 2: about that, but I wanted to do that. I was
Speaker 2: excited about that.
Speaker 3: And do you want people to know that I know?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah he knows now, Yeah, I know that so fat.
Speaker 3: I cannot wait. I think I think about it like
Speaker 3: four times a day.
Speaker 2: Ah, I just I cannot wait.
Speaker 1: It's going to be so fun.
Speaker 3: If people know who were going. No, not yet, let's
Speaker 3: keep it a secret.
Speaker 2: But I think it's fun because this vacation says like,
Speaker 2: do you both and what you like your vacation to
Speaker 2: look like? We have a wish list of all the
Speaker 2: things that we want to do, and they're very similar.
Speaker 2: It's not not one thing where it's like I don't
Speaker 2: want to do this, but my partner does. Like we're
Speaker 2: both open to trying things and having fun. And for this,
Speaker 2: I don't want to just lay at a beach somewhere.
Speaker 2: I want to I want us to where I think
Speaker 2: we thrive the most is an adventure and doing active things.
Speaker 2: And so this is right up that alley.
Speaker 3: I think it was a place for lying on a beach.
Speaker 1: Yes, for a couple of days February.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, And I think we're in agreement with that. Yeah,
Speaker 3: Like if that's what we're going for, then that's what
Speaker 3: we're doing.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So I think we're good on the front end because
Speaker 3: you hear a lot of people that go on vacational like, well,
Speaker 3: he just wants to lie in the beach and I
Speaker 3: end up just wander on the round, the walking, and
Speaker 3: I'm like, wow, how can you how can you not
Speaker 3: be aligned before you decide where you're going and what
Speaker 3: you're doing. I find that that would be tough. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 3: and a fine question. Who's the fun to apologize? And
Speaker 3: either of you have a hard time apologizing?
Speaker 1: Who's the first to apologize? Yeah?
Speaker 3: And then this agreement probably do Yeah, yeah, thank you? Yeah,
Speaker 3: both stubborn. You're less stubborn.
Speaker 1: I've worked really hard to apologize first.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would say you apologize bost. I think we
Speaker 3: both have a hard tame apologizing, but we've got better
Speaker 3: at managing it. Yeah, and actually, okay, I put myself
Speaker 3: in your shoes. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the kind of our Our no rule is
Speaker 2: in something it's alan's brought to the relationship where it's
Speaker 2: flip it. If it's flipped, how would you feel? And
Speaker 2: that's just been a really good not only reflection before
Speaker 2: I do things, but just something I always think about
Speaker 2: in just regular conversations what I would do prior to you.
Speaker 2: I would never think to flip it, really never, But
Speaker 2: there was no respect, you know, previously, so why would
Speaker 2: I flip it?
Speaker 3: You know?
Speaker 2: When I when I didn't feel perspected. So with this situation,
Speaker 2: I always go to flip it. How how do you feel?
Speaker 2: What would I what would I want in this situation?
Speaker 2: Would I be happy in this situation? And then but
Speaker 2: I think it's interesting because I think when I ask
Speaker 2: you to flip it, you have a harder time with that,
Speaker 2: Like I will. I will look at what you say,
Speaker 2: like flip it, and I'm like, okay, yeah I can.
Speaker 2: I can totally see that. But when I tell you
Speaker 2: to flip it, it's like, no, it only flips the
Speaker 2: other way. It doesn't flip your way, sure or not.
Speaker 3: It's like a coin that's got heads or tails. This
Speaker 3: one's only got heads. Cliff it. No, don't see it,
Speaker 3: cliff a game. Still don't see it?
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's be flipped a few times to show you.
Speaker 1: Do you agree or no?
Speaker 3: Again, it goes back to me being a little bit
Speaker 3: more stubborn. If you asked me to flip the situation
Speaker 3: when I would I like to be in that situation,
Speaker 3: then I'll probably have a few, if some butts before
Speaker 3: I finally say, yeah, you're right, it's not good or
Speaker 3: it is good or whatever the situation is at a time.
Speaker 2: Have you ever disagreed on how to handle a parenting situation?
Speaker 3: Not the big disagreement, None that I can think of offhand. No,
Speaker 3: I smacked Roman's ass once. No, you did, not a
Speaker 3: little bit like not, And you're like, we don't smack
Speaker 3: in this house.
Speaker 1: We don't. But I don't remember that.
Speaker 3: That's exactly That's why it made such an made that
Speaker 3: much of an impression. You don't even remember. Or I
Speaker 3: think maybe I said I'm when to smack.
Speaker 1: Has asked, Yeah, I don't think you actually did.
Speaker 3: No, maybe I didn't because I'm like.
Speaker 2: He's this much old Harvard many months old or whatever,
Speaker 2: like and no, we don't do that.
Speaker 3: Okay, So maybe I just said I'm going to smack.
Speaker 3: Has asked the you you raised it and said we
Speaker 3: don't smack in this house.
Speaker 1: Yeah, like, hm, that's not how my glass region was raised.
Speaker 3: Let's talk about that.
Speaker 1: Really. Here we go.
Speaker 2: We're having an Instagram right now. This is a big
Speaker 2: one actually, and we're just figuring this out.
Speaker 3: No, we'll not figuring it out because realistically it's not
Speaker 3: something that I want to do. But have you researched
Speaker 3: the positives and negatives of it?
Speaker 1: You just don't.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's like it's you're then telling the person the
Speaker 2: kid to hit.
Speaker 3: Okay. Were you raised with a smack toass.
Speaker 2: Yes, and not a good way, which is why then
Speaker 2: you think it's okay and it's not okay. I'm not
Speaker 2: saying I got into abusive relationships because I got into
Speaker 2: abusive room, but and there are levels of things that happen,
Speaker 2: and I think back then that was more norm to
Speaker 2: be spanked with. Like my dad was absolutely spanked with
Speaker 2: the belts because that was his generation him than carrying
Speaker 2: that on with our generation. It makes sense, but there's
Speaker 2: no like it's I cannot imagine a world today where
Speaker 2: a child is spanked with a belt and it is okay.
Speaker 3: I'm not talking about smacking anyone.
Speaker 2: Right, but just think about like when we were raised,
Speaker 2: I would have the belt. That is child abuse.
Speaker 1: You had the belt, yes.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, okay. My dad was a smick moss known
Speaker 3: again but that was.
Speaker 1: Oh we got the belt. Yeah.
Speaker 2: More so my brother but like not okay, again he
Speaker 2: was raised with that. I mean my mom spanked my
Speaker 2: brother with a wooden spoon and it broke in half.
Speaker 2: Like I mean, there was yeah, what I'm saying it's
Speaker 2: and I remember I laughed about it. I'm like, wait,
Speaker 2: are you punishing him?
Speaker 3: Like, but yeah, yeah, I think there's certain things that
Speaker 3: you carry from generation to generation that healthy. There's not
Speaker 3: one of them. I don't think a smack toss now
Speaker 3: and again does anyone any harm. But I do not
Speaker 3: intend to be smacking Roman's ass.
Speaker 1: I just don't.
Speaker 2: And listen, I have friends that have smacked their kids before.
Speaker 2: I have friends we talked about on here, Kristen and Window,
Speaker 2: and we talked about how she gave her son the soap,
Speaker 2: and then I'm like, that's also something.
Speaker 1: That we had.
Speaker 2: I was raised in such that household that it's so triggering,
Speaker 2: and then now then being in an abusive relationships. I
Speaker 2: just don't see what the any sort of benefit would
Speaker 2: be to actually hitting a kid. And I think it
Speaker 2: shows that that's okay, and it's no, it's not okay
Speaker 2: to be hit. To be punished like I am bad
Speaker 2: equals I am being hit and that's how I am punished.
Speaker 3: You know, I agree with.
Speaker 2: You, So I just and it's not about kids being
Speaker 2: soft these days. It's not about that at all. There
Speaker 2: are ways to discipline your child without raising a hand. Again,
Speaker 2: this is my own personal opinion with parenting. I know
Speaker 2: other parents do it different ways if that is how
Speaker 2: they feel, and listen, there are times I am not
Speaker 2: proud of the way that I've screamed before. That's not
Speaker 2: okay too, you know, like I've lost my temper and
Speaker 2: screamed at them. Now that's very foreign fee between. But
Speaker 2: we are all. We are doing the best we can.
Speaker 2: But to make a habit of that, like of hitting
Speaker 2: and it's great, like this is not okay in my
Speaker 2: personal opinion, don't come at me.
Speaker 1: I agree with you, but so I would be upset
Speaker 1: with given my.
Speaker 2: History, and I don't think him hitting that is whatever.
Speaker 2: There should be other consequences. Take away the TV or
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 3: Know a little bit, raising voices.
Speaker 2: Again, I don't think there's any Again, I don't do
Speaker 2: it perfectly, but I don't see it's still anger in a aggressing,
Speaker 2: aggressive way manner. And again I have triggers from the
Speaker 2: way my dad would look at me or the yelling.
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't like it, which is why I don't react
Speaker 2: to it in situations if you get angry, I react opposite.
Speaker 1: I don't like it. I don't hear it.
Speaker 2: I don't like you can take that somewhere else because
Speaker 2: I'm not here for it kind of vibe.
Speaker 1: What are your thoughts?
Speaker 3: I think that to be a shift in tone.
Speaker 2: A shift in tone, sure, like absolutely not do not
Speaker 2: do that, you know, like that kind of shift. But to.
Speaker 3: No, I think that has to be a shift in tone.
Speaker 3: That has to be a shift in volume. It doesn't
Speaker 3: need to be aggressive. It can be. It can be
Speaker 3: a hey, yeah to get a reaction, an and some reaction.
Speaker 2: Sure I could see that possibly, Yeah, woy to ask
Speaker 2: that question? Boy?
Speaker 1: Did that just come?
Speaker 3: Smack tosses and raised voices.
Speaker 2: Relationship headlines, Kellie Ripper reveals the secret behind her almost
Speaker 2: thirty year marriage to Mark Quinsuelos. They've been married for
Speaker 2: almost thirty years. There's such a cute couple. This is
Speaker 2: what she said. She was the first year of our
Speaker 2: marriage for us was the worst. Like it was really hard.
Speaker 2: We discover things about each other, like, oh my god,
Speaker 2: he breathes and it sounds irritating to me. So you
Speaker 2: just have to not panic because you've because you'll settle
Speaker 2: into each other. A lot of people find the first year,
Speaker 2: you know, really hard, and then it sort of deteriorates.
Speaker 2: So she went on to, you know, basically talk about that.
Speaker 2: Other people agreed, someone saying, we've been married forty one
Speaker 2: years and yes, the first year was the hardest. Babe.
Speaker 1: How do you think the first year of marriage has
Speaker 1: been for us?
Speaker 3: It's been I think it's been a it's been a
Speaker 3: roller coaster of good and good in growth and not
Speaker 3: so good moments.
Speaker 1: What do you think are not so good moments are?
Speaker 3: I think? I mean, listen, it's a first year of marriage,
Speaker 3: so you're still still a part of your developing into
Speaker 3: each other's habits and behaviors, monitoring and dealing with reactions
Speaker 3: to things, and some things are new, some things are not.
Speaker 3: I think it's been I think room for growth and
Speaker 3: it has been great. I think we've had so many
Speaker 3: moments that have been amazing with it. So many moments
Speaker 3: we've been angry and frustrated, and but whatever those moments
Speaker 3: have been, we've grown through them in a positive in
Speaker 3: a positive way. Listen, we're in a better place. We're
Speaker 3: in a better place now than maybe are yesterday, and
Speaker 3: will be a better place tomorrow than we are today
Speaker 3: because we try and grow from each each day. I
Speaker 3: don't think anyone's first year of marriage will be playing sailing.
Speaker 3: I really don't. But as long as you recognize that, Okay,
Speaker 3: this is my person that I want to spend the
Speaker 3: rest of my life with and that never changes, then
Speaker 3: I think you can. I think you can overcome any
Speaker 3: hurdle that happens in the first year. And there will
Speaker 3: be hurdles like we've had. But I've never like, I
Speaker 3: love you more than I loved you when we got
Speaker 3: married or nearly a year I love you more now
Speaker 3: we've grown more together, we've been through and more together.
Speaker 3: It's been tough at certain times, but we've we've we've
Speaker 3: got through it, and we've we've embraced certain things. We've
Speaker 3: struggled with certain things, and I think that's part of it.
Speaker 3: Never going to be perfect, But you grow from the
Speaker 3: You grow from the the moments where you have to
Speaker 3: challenge each other or deal with each other or deal
Speaker 3: with certain things. So I think it's been amazing. Like
Speaker 3: I love being married to you, Thanks be.
Speaker 2: I love be married too, too, And I think has
Speaker 2: it been perfect? No, But I wouldn't have wanted it
Speaker 2: to be in a sense where like I love that
Speaker 2: we've been able to work through things together and that
Speaker 2: piece makes us stronger. And I love that piece just
Speaker 2: like you said, like I love you more now than
Speaker 2: I did then. And also our first year marriage, we
Speaker 2: have a newborn, you know, we have you know, you're
Speaker 2: you know, fighting your fight over here with green cards
Speaker 2: and work and everything, and so that just adds a
Speaker 2: whole layer. There's a lot of stress, you know, and
Speaker 2: so that's that's hard. And you know, three kids, and
Speaker 2: so it's probably looks a little different than maybe some
Speaker 2: people's first year of marriage that don't have kids. But
Speaker 2: I do think there is something to be said of
Speaker 2: you are settling in and that is the first year
Speaker 2: of settling in and figuring things out and how people operate.
Speaker 3: And it's exactly what it's like I said to you
Speaker 3: a few weeks ago. We need to almost need to
Speaker 3: click what sales about a slack Yeah, and actually of
Speaker 3: ourselves a partner back because we deal with a lot
Speaker 3: through your stuff, an eighteen month old baby, a lot
Speaker 3: of logistics, a lot like Julie and Jace boy being
Speaker 3: far away, and so we handle a law as a couple,
Speaker 3: and there's a family, so we almost need to, like,
Speaker 3: you know, what'd be good.
Speaker 2: Nikolache reveals the golden rule by which he and wife
Speaker 2: Vanessa Lachay abide to keep their marriage strong. He basically said,
Speaker 2: I think the best thing you can do is not
Speaker 2: bring your work home with you, which is tricky when
Speaker 2: you work with your spouse. Nick said on the episode,
Speaker 2: which premiered on Tuesday, May twenty seventh, I think we
Speaker 2: do a really good job of doing that for the
Speaker 2: most part, but it's not easy working with your spouse.
Speaker 2: Sometimes sometimes you show up for work and there's an
Speaker 2: argument at home that you brought with you to work,
Speaker 2: and you don't want that to bleed over. And sometimes
Speaker 2: these arguments at work, there's arguments at work that bleed over.
Speaker 2: You don't want that, So you know, it's kind of
Speaker 2: good to compartmentalize and recognize that you're doing a job. Yes,
Speaker 2: you're a married couple and we've been working together for
Speaker 2: almost twenty years. So I think that's the golden rule
Speaker 2: is don't bring your work home, don't bring home to work,
Speaker 2: try and keep it as separate as you can are.
Speaker 2: Do you think we're good with separating work at home.
Speaker 3: Life, Yeah, I do. I think with disagreements about the
Speaker 3: podcast at times, but it's never carried on or lingered
Speaker 3: to a point where it becomes a problem. I yeah,
Speaker 3: there's certain times I've been disappointed in certain parts of
Speaker 3: my work and career and I've not I've not been
Speaker 3: in the best of moods, and so the other's things
Speaker 3: when I have brought it home, but it's never really
Speaker 3: caused a huge issue for us.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I think kind of the same thing
Speaker 2: the other day, I was in a bummer mood, but
Speaker 2: I told you, and I think that's the piece where
Speaker 2: it's the best thing to do in those moments is
Speaker 2: when you are upset about maybe something at work, communicate
Speaker 2: to your spouse because if not, they're going to you
Speaker 2: will then bring it into the relationship with whatever mood
Speaker 2: you're in and how then it's going to of course
Speaker 2: affect the relationship. So saying like, hey, I've had a
Speaker 2: really bad day at work today and this is kind
Speaker 2: of where I'm at and what you did for me,
Speaker 2: We're like, let's go for a run. You want to
Speaker 2: go for a run, And I'm like, actually, yeah, like
Speaker 2: I needed to get out and do that. But to
Speaker 2: wrap up, I'm curious what would be your golden rule
Speaker 2: for our marriage? I have one, if you want me
Speaker 2: to go first, you okay? Mine would be to never say,
Speaker 2: like I think it's really important in a golden rule
Speaker 2: for marriages is to never say in a fight, I
Speaker 2: don't want to be with you or I don't want
Speaker 2: to do it be in this marriage anymore. I think
Speaker 2: it's so important to not do that in marriages because
Speaker 2: then it just kind of opens a can of well
Speaker 2: does hea says he mean that? And then insecurity and
Speaker 2: stuff like that. So I would be like, that would
Speaker 2: be the golden rule for me and for I think
Speaker 2: for a marriage too.
Speaker 1: What do you think?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I agreed. And also with that question, that's kind
Speaker 3: of a loaded question on what's the golden rule. I
Speaker 3: think there's a few golden rules. I think the I
Speaker 3: think it's something that we've always and I had a
Speaker 3: foundation on since the since we met was it's not
Speaker 3: always perfect. One of them has never been, but the
Speaker 3: respect or is always It's never perfect because you get frustrated,
Speaker 3: you get angry, and sometimes you can be a little
Speaker 3: bit disrespectful. But I think their biggest thing has always
Speaker 3: been a golden real is is loyalty and respect. I
Speaker 3: think those times were swayed on the respect, but never
Speaker 3: the loyalty. In respect. I mean like someone's stepped over
Speaker 3: the line in an argument and said something mm hmm
Speaker 3: that they probably shouldn't have said. I e me, not
Speaker 3: so much, not so much as you. But I think
Speaker 3: if you've always got trust and loyalty and a marriage,
Speaker 3: then you will. You're with each other because you enjoy
Speaker 3: each other's company, you make each other laugh and it's fun. Okay.
Speaker 3: I think there's a lot of things that our relationship
Speaker 3: can get through. I think a break of trust and loyalty,
Speaker 3: it struggles and softens.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I would say another piece on that, always
Speaker 2: act as if your partner's right next to you. Would
Speaker 2: you do what you were about to do if your
Speaker 2: partner was next to you? And that is a huge
Speaker 2: golden rule as.
Speaker 3: Well, especially when your own movie sets.
Speaker 2: Please, I'm so good. Respect levels off the charts.
Speaker 3: I know that, and that's why we're still here, loving
Speaker 3: each other absolutely.
Speaker 2: All right, guys, Well see you next week for another one.
Speaker 2: Send us your questions in bye bye