1 00:00:01,080 --> 00:00:04,040 Speaker 1: All right, guys, it's serious now for reels, for reals, 2 00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:06,520 Speaker 1: for reals, this is a last weekend before the election. 3 00:00:06,559 --> 00:00:10,880 Speaker 1: We have only four days until election day itself, November third. 4 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,640 Speaker 1: Go to vote dot org to get early voting information 5 00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:16,800 Speaker 1: in your state. It's still not too late to vote early. 6 00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:20,200 Speaker 1: Please vote early time. Now we're going to switch gears. 7 00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:22,840 Speaker 1: Here for my Strawberry letter and listen. If you need 8 00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:27,000 Speaker 1: advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more. Please 9 00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:30,280 Speaker 1: submit your Strawberry letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and 10 00:00:30,360 --> 00:00:33,960 Speaker 1: click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter 11 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:37,479 Speaker 1: live on the air, just like we're gonna read this 12 00:00:37,520 --> 00:00:40,240 Speaker 1: one right here, right now. That's all for you, Jay 13 00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:43,360 Speaker 1: bugg a lot, hold on tight, we got it for you. 14 00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:47,120 Speaker 1: Here it ease Strawberry Letter. Thank you Nephew. Subject by 15 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:51,000 Speaker 1: Golly he wants to be Polly. Just Stephen Shirley. I'm 16 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:54,280 Speaker 1: in my early thirties and single, but I'm finally ready 17 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:58,160 Speaker 1: to settle down again after dating a mentally abusive man 18 00:00:58,240 --> 00:01:01,240 Speaker 1: for close to four years. I always thought I'd fall 19 00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:03,880 Speaker 1: in love and get married before I was thirty, But 20 00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:06,600 Speaker 1: then I realized that this is just a fairy tale 21 00:01:06,640 --> 00:01:11,160 Speaker 1: because dating is very different now. Every guy I met 22 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:15,199 Speaker 1: this year was a playboy and wanted to casually date 23 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:19,039 Speaker 1: and have sex. So I switched to online dating and 24 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:23,240 Speaker 1: I instantly met a guy online. We've already gone out 25 00:01:23,319 --> 00:01:27,959 Speaker 1: on multiple dates and our chemistry is amazing. We vibe 26 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:31,039 Speaker 1: on so many levels. And he's been open and honest 27 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,800 Speaker 1: about his love life and the fact that he's polyamorous. 28 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:39,600 Speaker 1: I've always been monogamous, whether I got cheated on or not, 29 00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:43,800 Speaker 1: so polyamory was foreign to me. My guy has been 30 00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:47,480 Speaker 1: explaining polyamory to me and it has piqued my interest. 31 00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:50,800 Speaker 1: He said he's really falling for me, and he's hoping 32 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:54,840 Speaker 1: that I'm open minded about his lifestyle because it might 33 00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:58,520 Speaker 1: be a deal breaker if I'm not. I was honest 34 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 1: and told him I've been a little curious about a 35 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:05,559 Speaker 1: manageatois or boyurism, so this might work out. He told 36 00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:08,080 Speaker 1: me that I will be able to help him select 37 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:10,960 Speaker 1: our other female partner, and he'd never be with a 38 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:14,080 Speaker 1: woman without telling me first. He explained to me that 39 00:02:14,280 --> 00:02:18,680 Speaker 1: sometimes he will be with someone else without me being involved, 40 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:21,560 Speaker 1: and I have to be able to handle it. I 41 00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:24,600 Speaker 1: know I can be jealous hearted, so I'm not sure 42 00:02:24,760 --> 00:02:29,320 Speaker 1: how I'll act if when if slash when he tells 43 00:02:29,320 --> 00:02:31,880 Speaker 1: me he's spending the night with someone else. I asked 44 00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:34,480 Speaker 1: him about marriage and he said, the same rules apply. 45 00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:38,400 Speaker 1: He's such a good man in every other way. So 46 00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:41,360 Speaker 1: should I be open to something new or forget about 47 00:02:41,480 --> 00:02:47,919 Speaker 1: him and keep looking for my forever person? Jesu girl, 48 00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:52,359 Speaker 1: run for the heels in your heels. Okay, please, this 49 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:54,160 Speaker 1: man is not a good man. You're saying he's a 50 00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:55,959 Speaker 1: good man and every This is not a good man 51 00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:58,760 Speaker 1: for you. What are you talking about? This man isn't 52 00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:04,480 Speaker 1: even thinking about you. He's only thinking of himself, point black, period, 53 00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:08,440 Speaker 1: and what he wants. Okay, this, come on, now, you've 54 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:11,640 Speaker 1: been waiting and waiting and this is what you what 55 00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:14,520 Speaker 1: you come up with? No, you can do way better 56 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:17,520 Speaker 1: than this. I mean, since when did I've always been 57 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:21,200 Speaker 1: a little curious turned into an all out cheating scenario 58 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:23,919 Speaker 1: on his part. He wants to be with other women 59 00:03:24,040 --> 00:03:27,400 Speaker 1: without you. No, ma'am, no, ma'am, Please don't put up 60 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,760 Speaker 1: with that. Just because you may have thought about something 61 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:32,880 Speaker 1: or fantasized about it does not mean you have to 62 00:03:32,919 --> 00:03:36,480 Speaker 1: compromise your standards and actually do it. You don't sound 63 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:38,600 Speaker 1: like you're cool with this at all, because you said 64 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 1: you would be jealous hearted. You're jealous hearted, you said that, 65 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:45,200 Speaker 1: But for this man, you're thinking about doing it, and 66 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 1: that's all he wants, so he can say, well, you 67 00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:52,680 Speaker 1: said you were curious. Not one time, not one time 68 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,200 Speaker 1: in this entire letter did he ask you what you 69 00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:58,200 Speaker 1: want it? Not one time. Where are your needs and 70 00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:00,400 Speaker 1: what are your needs gonna be taken care of? It's 71 00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:03,000 Speaker 1: all about him and what he wants and how he 72 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:06,840 Speaker 1: wants it. Do not settle, Do not settle with this man. 73 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:10,840 Speaker 1: Please don't marry this clown because you will be miserable. 74 00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:14,200 Speaker 1: I'm telling you he's willing to share himself with everyone, 75 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:16,800 Speaker 1: and pretty soon there won't be enough to go around 76 00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:20,120 Speaker 1: for you. I just say, don't fall for this oky dog. 77 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:23,159 Speaker 1: He's a scammer. He's just doing it with sex, okay, 78 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:27,360 Speaker 1: trying to make you think that this is okay, stay awoke. 79 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:30,159 Speaker 1: Just don't get played by this guy. You gotta run 80 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:33,560 Speaker 1: from him. He's no good for you, Steve. Don't you 81 00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:36,799 Speaker 1: know what, Ladies, this is gonna be a moment where 82 00:04:36,839 --> 00:04:42,719 Speaker 1: I stopped and give you some real conversation. Because I 83 00:04:42,920 --> 00:04:46,240 Speaker 1: understand what this woman is coming from, but she's not 84 00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:51,000 Speaker 1: paying close enough attention to the game. Now, this woman 85 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:53,720 Speaker 1: in her thirties, and she willna settle down because she's 86 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:56,920 Speaker 1: been in a bad relationship for four years. And then 87 00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:59,839 Speaker 1: she said that she thought she'd fall in love by thirty. 88 00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:04,000 Speaker 1: But then realize this is a fairytale. Why is that 89 00:05:04,120 --> 00:05:08,120 Speaker 1: a fairytale? You just have to move your date back. See, 90 00:05:08,279 --> 00:05:10,919 Speaker 1: most things I've wanted in life didn't happen at the 91 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,159 Speaker 1: exact date I wanted it to happen. I wish it did. 92 00:05:15,640 --> 00:05:17,200 Speaker 1: I wish it did. A matter of fact, I know 93 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:21,120 Speaker 1: very few people who nail goes down to a specific 94 00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:25,160 Speaker 1: date and that's the date that happens. Oh, it all 95 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:30,480 Speaker 1: can eventually happen, but the date and time You losing 96 00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:32,880 Speaker 1: self thinking it's not gonna happen because it didn't happen 97 00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:37,279 Speaker 1: at the perceived time of yours. Then here she go. 98 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:41,640 Speaker 1: Every guy you'd met this year was a playboy and 99 00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:45,280 Speaker 1: wanted to casually date and have sex. So I switched 100 00:05:45,279 --> 00:05:48,800 Speaker 1: to online dating and instantly met a guy online who 101 00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:54,960 Speaker 1: is a playboy who wants to casually date and who 102 00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:57,960 Speaker 1: wants to have sex but you know what he did. 103 00:05:58,680 --> 00:06:01,560 Speaker 1: He wrapped it up in a bowl and a box 104 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:04,360 Speaker 1: in a package and put a label on it. Call 105 00:06:04,560 --> 00:06:08,800 Speaker 1: what Shirley. He's polyamorous. You know, he has to hell 106 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:11,480 Speaker 1: out his dad. He has to have more than one relationship. 107 00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:16,520 Speaker 1: And you appreciate the fact that he's open and honest 108 00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:20,599 Speaker 1: about his relationship. Ladies, y'all be over playing this honesty thing. 109 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:24,080 Speaker 1: At least he was honest. He's just telling you I'm 110 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:27,000 Speaker 1: a player, take it or not now, while he ain't 111 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:29,800 Speaker 1: got nothing invested in you, he fishing to see if 112 00:06:29,839 --> 00:06:32,599 Speaker 1: he can get you to bite on this hook. You 113 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:37,080 Speaker 1: picking females out and and him not being with other 114 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:41,280 Speaker 1: women without telling you mans hell out of here. Just bullcrap. 115 00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:44,159 Speaker 1: He's a clown. All right. Listen. We'll have cart two 116 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,720 Speaker 1: of Steve's response coming up at twenty three minutes after 117 00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 1: the hour, subject by Golly, he wants to be Polly 118 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:53,640 Speaker 1: will get back into it right after this. You're listening 119 00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:57,800 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve, let's 120 00:06:57,800 --> 00:07:03,520 Speaker 1: recap today's Strawberry letters, subjects to be poly You know, sisters, listen, 121 00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:05,880 Speaker 1: if this is what you want to do, then cool. 122 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:09,640 Speaker 1: But she doesn't do that, But don't settle for that 123 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:13,120 Speaker 1: if you want something else. You've been wanting to get 124 00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:17,360 Speaker 1: married because you want a fairytale yo yo, somebody but 125 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,880 Speaker 1: everybody you the mad as a player. Then you went online, 126 00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:23,320 Speaker 1: you meet a guy that's another player. He just slickered 127 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:25,800 Speaker 1: with it. And because now he didn't trapped you with it, 128 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:28,600 Speaker 1: I'm being honest about my lifestyle. Women to give too 129 00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:32,200 Speaker 1: much credit to honesty. He's honestly telling you that he's 130 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:33,720 Speaker 1: been to do you any kind of the way he 131 00:07:33,760 --> 00:07:37,040 Speaker 1: wants to and and and that's because he's honest at 132 00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:42,160 Speaker 1: least I know before he do it to me. That's stupid, right, Look, 133 00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,280 Speaker 1: I mean, when we're talking about being ignorant, let's just 134 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:47,119 Speaker 1: talk about it all the way. So you get this guy, 135 00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:55,880 Speaker 1: he's a pollys amorous now and said he I've always 136 00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:59,480 Speaker 1: been monogamous. This girl says she's always been monogamous one 137 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:06,160 Speaker 1: even even if she got cheated on or not so polyamory, amory, 138 00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:11,840 Speaker 1: whatever the hell that is. See, I don't even like 139 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:18,200 Speaker 1: saying it because it ain't no. I can't say all this. Yeah, 140 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:20,120 Speaker 1: and I don't know who who who want to who 141 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:26,200 Speaker 1: want to buy now? Here now, he said, And then 142 00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:28,200 Speaker 1: you say this kind of peaking your interest. Then he 143 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:32,040 Speaker 1: told you that he was really falling for you, and 144 00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:35,200 Speaker 1: he was hoping that you open minded about his lifestyle 145 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,320 Speaker 1: because it might be a deal break if I'm not see, 146 00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:40,360 Speaker 1: he hadn't found out that you really kind of like 147 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,080 Speaker 1: him and feeling. So now he putting out there how 148 00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:45,880 Speaker 1: much you can take and if you can't take everything, 149 00:08:45,920 --> 00:08:49,120 Speaker 1: I'm saying, it could be a deal breaker. But he's 150 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:53,240 Speaker 1: so smooth with it, and he's so he'd have made 151 00:08:53,240 --> 00:08:55,560 Speaker 1: you think he everything in every other department. But I 152 00:08:55,559 --> 00:08:58,440 Speaker 1: got news for you, lady, I promise you he noted. 153 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:02,120 Speaker 1: He's not every thing he say he is, because all 154 00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:04,160 Speaker 1: he trying to do is set that up so he 155 00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:08,000 Speaker 1: can tell you what he really is a player. That 156 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:10,920 Speaker 1: that that where he work and how much he make 157 00:09:11,080 --> 00:09:13,959 Speaker 1: and how he ain't. None of that gonna be to 158 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:18,480 Speaker 1: fit you. So now you said you've been a little 159 00:09:18,520 --> 00:09:22,320 Speaker 1: curious about manage a tire and voyeurism. I don't know 160 00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:24,640 Speaker 1: what that is? What is that ship? That's when you 161 00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:29,320 Speaker 1: know what that is? People? And when you like to 162 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:34,920 Speaker 1: watch other people do man If I'm not if I'm 163 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:39,439 Speaker 1: not in the activity. You know, man, that's why I 164 00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:41,040 Speaker 1: ain't never been in the point or none of that. 165 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:43,599 Speaker 1: Ain't gonna look. But if it ain't me, what I 166 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:49,000 Speaker 1: what I want? What do? I'm not watching nobody do 167 00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:52,400 Speaker 1: nobody else. I get nothing from that dub. I'm not 168 00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:57,719 Speaker 1: in the video anyway, So you want to watch? So 169 00:09:57,840 --> 00:10:02,040 Speaker 1: this might work out? He told me. Did you see 170 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:03,440 Speaker 1: this is the Let me give you a little bit, 171 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:06,000 Speaker 1: let me empower you see. This is the game. They 172 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:10,120 Speaker 1: got you able to help select the other female partner. 173 00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:15,280 Speaker 1: What is that? Oh? I get to vote. You need 174 00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:17,960 Speaker 1: to take your hands down hit November third and vote. 175 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:21,760 Speaker 1: How you're trying to vote for? Who he gonna mess 176 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:25,920 Speaker 1: over you with? Then he said he would never be 177 00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:32,320 Speaker 1: with another woman without telling you first. He's so honest. 178 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:37,480 Speaker 1: But then he explained to me that sometimes he'll be 179 00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:41,079 Speaker 1: with somebody else without you being involved, and I have 180 00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:44,760 Speaker 1: to be able to deal with Hold up, what wait, wait, backups, 181 00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:47,600 Speaker 1: say I want you to hear this real Clinton. First 182 00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:50,200 Speaker 1: of all, you get to select the other females. Yeah, 183 00:10:50,840 --> 00:10:55,840 Speaker 1: Then he told you he'd never be without a woman 184 00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:59,240 Speaker 1: without telling you first. So that means Dad's gonna be 185 00:10:59,280 --> 00:11:02,600 Speaker 1: something else outside of the one you selected. Are you 186 00:11:02,679 --> 00:11:07,839 Speaker 1: listening closely? Then he explained it. Sometimes he said he'll 187 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:12,880 Speaker 1: be involved with someone else without you being involved, which 188 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:16,320 Speaker 1: mean it's gonna be some more women that he didn't 189 00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:19,640 Speaker 1: got into this trick that you don't know about, and 190 00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:22,320 Speaker 1: you got and you got to be able to handle it. 191 00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:26,400 Speaker 1: Then here you go. I can be jealous hearted. So 192 00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:28,360 Speaker 1: I'm not sure how I'm gonna active when he tells 193 00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:30,320 Speaker 1: me he's spending a night with somebody else, I know 194 00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:34,559 Speaker 1: exactly how you're gonna You're gonna have a damn food, yeah, 195 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:38,400 Speaker 1: because that's you want something real, But he's telling you 196 00:11:38,520 --> 00:11:42,280 Speaker 1: a hand of time. I'm not gonna give you anything real. 197 00:11:42,760 --> 00:11:44,880 Speaker 1: I'm gonna get all of what I want. I'm gonna 198 00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:48,559 Speaker 1: get you another female and anybody else I want to 199 00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:51,000 Speaker 1: go bet with it. So all this time, while you 200 00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:54,199 Speaker 1: was in this abusive relationship, you have adopted, you have 201 00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:58,760 Speaker 1: adapted a way to handle abuse. And because they're not 202 00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:02,160 Speaker 1: physically abuse used to you, you're going along with another 203 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:06,720 Speaker 1: kind of abuse. They're abusing your body in your mind. Look, ladies, 204 00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:10,679 Speaker 1: stop this. I asked him about marriage, and he said, 205 00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:13,560 Speaker 1: the same rules apply. Well, that ain't marriage yet. No, 206 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,600 Speaker 1: see when you getting married. That's some vows you take. 207 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:19,880 Speaker 1: So what he just told you say rules apply to marriage, 208 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:23,680 Speaker 1: which means he ain't interested in marriage at all. He's 209 00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:26,079 Speaker 1: such a good man in every other way. Well, how 210 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:31,000 Speaker 1: is he a good man's girl? You date this Donald Trump? 211 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,360 Speaker 1: Should I be open to something new? Hell now? Or 212 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:43,760 Speaker 1: forget about him and keep looking for my father person? Yeah? Run, 213 00:12:44,240 --> 00:12:47,840 Speaker 1: all right? Thank you? Stick post your comments on Today's 214 00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:51,160 Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook. 215 00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:53,840 Speaker 1: Please don't forget to check out the Strawberry Letter podcast 216 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:57,079 Speaker 1: on demand now Coming up at forty six minutes after 217 00:12:57,120 --> 00:12:59,720 Speaker 1: the hour, Pempin will be in the building with his 218 00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:03,840 Speaker 1: NFL picks. Yeah, we're gonna talk about boxing, about Mike Tyson, 219 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:06,720 Speaker 1: Roy Jones, all of that right after this with Junior 220 00:13:07,679 --> 00:13:11,800 Speaker 1: coming up. You're listening to the Dave Harvey Morning Show.