WEBVTT - The Difference Between Leadership And Management 0:00:05.040 --> 0:00:08.479 It's time for the b a q a A to 0:00:08.640 --> 0:00:11.119 b a q a which you say to be a 0:00:11.520 --> 0:00:14.560 q a Manda to be a q a with Tiff and. 0:00:14.600 --> 0:00:18.720 A to b a q a A welcome around, a 0:00:18.760 --> 0:00:21.760 vision question and answers. You have questions, We have some answers. 0:00:21.800 --> 0:00:27.000 But we're not your attorney, your doctor, your mama, your papa. 0:00:27.080 --> 0:00:30.880 Which is two super smart brown girls who know a 0:00:30.960 --> 0:00:35.320 thing or two about business, entrepreneurship, money, career and a 0:00:35.360 --> 0:00:37.120 little sprinkling of life or whatever. 0:00:37.200 --> 0:00:40.080 You know. So if you have questions, you know, go 0:00:40.120 --> 0:00:44.519 ahead and ask us. But yeah, yes, but. 0:00:46.320 --> 0:00:48.720 So this EPI, we're going to do a little bit 0:00:48.800 --> 0:00:51.760 of money and a little bit of money in your life, 0:00:51.960 --> 0:00:54.120 a little all. But I remember that's the I do 0:00:54.280 --> 0:00:57.480 remember a middle Yes, indeed, I don't remember who that 0:00:57.560 --> 0:00:58.720 was about how boys or something. 0:00:59.880 --> 0:01:02.920 I don't remember two thousand and one, five thousand. 0:01:04.280 --> 0:01:06.600 So I'm gonna do We're gonna do a half of 0:01:06.840 --> 0:01:08.520 business half a money question. 0:01:09.200 --> 0:01:10.920 Let's start with. 0:01:11.240 --> 0:01:13.000 This is not a specific business question that was in 0:01:13.040 --> 0:01:15.399 the You know, if you want to send us an 0:01:15.480 --> 0:01:18.440 email brand a Bishionpodcasts at gmail dot com, want to 0:01:18.440 --> 0:01:21.800 slide in the DMS on I g brand ambishon podcast 0:01:22.080 --> 0:01:25.720 or go to brandabision podcast dot com and click contact us. 0:01:26.240 --> 0:01:29.160 This is just something like because I just coach a 0:01:29.200 --> 0:01:31.120 lot of black and around women in business and this 0:01:31.160 --> 0:01:33.560 comes up a lot, So I figured i'd address it 0:01:34.160 --> 0:01:36.280 and you made it a talk through in and then we'll 0:01:36.280 --> 0:01:41.280 answer money questions. Question what is the difference between leadership 0:01:41.720 --> 0:01:45.840 and management? This is good because whether you work, you know, 0:01:46.040 --> 0:01:50.160 a nine to five or regular career job, or you 0:01:50.240 --> 0:01:53.360 are a business owner, this comes up a lot because 0:01:53.760 --> 0:01:57.440 I find that a lot of people really struggle with leadership. 0:01:58.240 --> 0:01:59.400 That this has come a lot. 0:01:59.440 --> 0:02:02.200 One of my men tease, she has been struggling a 0:02:02.200 --> 0:02:06.080 lot actually in her job with leadership. This is kind 0:02:06.120 --> 0:02:10.960 of like not her first leadership role, but certainly you know, 0:02:11.120 --> 0:02:14.200 this is probably one of her more in depth leadership roles. 0:02:14.600 --> 0:02:17.160 And she's having a hard time because she didn't get 0:02:17.160 --> 0:02:21.240 to pick her team, which is not abnormal in leadership. Oftentimes, 0:02:21.240 --> 0:02:22.600 like if you own a business, you get to pick 0:02:22.600 --> 0:02:24.799 your team, but oftentimes if you're hired, the team is 0:02:24.840 --> 0:02:29.560 already there and the team is now really like her 0:02:29.600 --> 0:02:38.120 that much. They muted and so how long it's been 0:02:38.280 --> 0:02:38.760 like just. 0:02:38.720 --> 0:02:39.519 A few months. 0:02:40.120 --> 0:02:43.680 Okay, you know, so to be to be fair, you know, 0:02:44.400 --> 0:02:48.679 my friend, she's not the warm and fuzzy type, and 0:02:48.760 --> 0:02:50.639 she's very much like I come here, I do my work. 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:53.280 She's really smart, obviously, just really smart does her work. 0:02:53.680 --> 0:02:55.560 And so one of the reasons why they hired her 0:02:55.639 --> 0:02:58.320 is because they felt like, you know this, this particular 0:02:58.360 --> 0:03:02.359 department lacks structure, and she's very organized, very structured. Here's 0:03:02.400 --> 0:03:04.440 what we're going to do. All her ideas are amazing 0:03:04.840 --> 0:03:07.440 and great. I was like, oh, this is great, but 0:03:07.520 --> 0:03:10.320 basically the team that she's been tasked to lead refuses 0:03:10.360 --> 0:03:12.520 to do any of her ideas, and she's not getting 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:17.080 as much support from her supervisor as far as, like 0:03:17.120 --> 0:03:17.760 I guess. 0:03:17.680 --> 0:03:18.480 I guess the support. 0:03:18.520 --> 0:03:20.320 She's thinking of bringing the hammer down, being like you've 0:03:20.320 --> 0:03:24.040 got to do the things that she's saying. And I said, well, 0:03:25.760 --> 0:03:28.959 even if your supervisor did that, they would undermine you 0:03:29.040 --> 0:03:29.880 at every turn. 0:03:30.080 --> 0:03:35.280 This every turn. So I said that it sounds like. 0:03:35.320 --> 0:03:37.840 You are approaching it from a place of management and 0:03:37.880 --> 0:03:41.160 not from a place of leadership, and it sounds like 0:03:41.200 --> 0:03:44.920 you have a team that does not trust you, you know, 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:47.520 And I said, what is the feedback that the team 0:03:47.600 --> 0:03:51.600 is giving you. And she was like, well, the feedback 0:03:51.640 --> 0:03:54.880 they kind of gave too about her through her supervisor 0:03:55.000 --> 0:03:58.640 is that like she's not she's not. She doesn't listen 0:03:58.920 --> 0:04:01.440 to like you know, our I is and our you know. 0:04:02.280 --> 0:04:04.960 And I said, okay, well it's that legitimate feedback, and 0:04:05.000 --> 0:04:06.480 she was like, I guess. So she's like, not that 0:04:06.480 --> 0:04:09.560 I don't listen to the ideas, but I guess listening 0:04:09.600 --> 0:04:11.720 for the sake of just like a hah hah do 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:14.560 what I said, or listening for the sake of integration 0:04:14.880 --> 0:04:15.920 into the solutions. 0:04:16.640 --> 0:04:18.800 And I said, have you integrated any of their solutions? 0:04:18.839 --> 0:04:21.479 She's like, not really, because if those things worked, they 0:04:21.520 --> 0:04:22.760 would been doing it before I got here. 0:04:22.960 --> 0:04:24.680 So I can understand that perspective. 0:04:25.120 --> 0:04:28.320 But the problem is is that like you're coming in 0:04:28.360 --> 0:04:30.200 with like, here are six new things we're going to do, 0:04:30.960 --> 0:04:34.560 and they're like, I don't want to do that. So anyway, 0:04:34.640 --> 0:04:36.839 my advice that I gave her is that you have 0:04:36.960 --> 0:04:40.320 to build trust first. And the way to build trust 0:04:40.600 --> 0:04:44.640 is this great book by Franklin Covey, and he talks 0:04:44.640 --> 0:04:48.640 about that you actually don't earn trust, you give trust 0:04:48.680 --> 0:04:51.080 and then you receive it back. And so what it 0:04:51.160 --> 0:04:53.599 sounds like is that her team is like, it's clear 0:04:53.600 --> 0:04:55.599 that you don't value what we bring to the table, 0:04:55.960 --> 0:04:57.520 and it's clear that you don't trust us to do 0:04:57.560 --> 0:04:59.719 our jobs, and so we're not going to show up 0:04:59.760 --> 0:05:03.080 for you. And you know, at first she was kind 0:05:03.080 --> 0:05:04.920 of defiant, like, well, that's all right, because I'm the bulls. 0:05:04.920 --> 0:05:07.000 I could do whatever, not realizing. 0:05:06.600 --> 0:05:09.719 That if the team gets together, they are slowly pushing 0:05:09.760 --> 0:05:10.160 her out. 0:05:10.240 --> 0:05:11.320 And it's worky. 0:05:11.560 --> 0:05:13.520 That's feel like a common enemy to make you really 0:05:13.560 --> 0:05:17.560 get along with your colleagues. It's the best morale and 0:05:17.839 --> 0:05:21.600 the morales only because you guys have like something big 0:05:21.640 --> 0:05:23.800 and common and you're like, yeah, we all we all 0:05:23.800 --> 0:05:24.599 hate her, Okay. 0:05:24.640 --> 0:05:27.280 Cool. You know when they're at the meeting and. 0:05:27.240 --> 0:05:29.279 You know, the flag is like step while you while 0:05:29.279 --> 0:05:31.600 you're doing the meeting, especially, oh my god, don't let 0:05:31.600 --> 0:05:33.680 it be a virtual meeting. They are. They are. 0:05:35.839 --> 0:05:38.680 The girls are waving, hey ba fan, We're gonna take 0:05:38.720 --> 0:05:41.119 a quick break and we'll be right back. 0:05:47.040 --> 0:05:49.479 So now my friend is like, what do I do now? 0:05:49.480 --> 0:05:52.919 I said, now, you have to do the work of 0:05:53.160 --> 0:05:56.359 leadership versus management, which is you have to start to 0:05:56.400 --> 0:05:59.240 build trust. You have to one. It's like, one, you 0:05:59.279 --> 0:06:01.240 can't bring in sick, new different things that people are 0:06:01.279 --> 0:06:04.479 going to do. That's overwhelming, you know any people, Yes, 0:06:04.640 --> 0:06:07.279 change that work girl, And then the change has to 0:06:07.279 --> 0:06:10.800 be collectively decided on. You know. I said, like, one 0:06:10.839 --> 0:06:12.760 of the best things one of the tools that I 0:06:12.839 --> 0:06:15.839 use for the budget Neista is I'll say, here is 0:06:15.880 --> 0:06:20.000 the big overall goal, and I Am not going to 0:06:20.000 --> 0:06:21.480 make the decision of how we're going to get there, 0:06:21.480 --> 0:06:24.479 but here's the vision. Let's do just the brain dump 0:06:24.680 --> 0:06:29.160 or we all, based upon your expertise, kind of talk through. 0:06:29.120 --> 0:06:30.880 Some of the ways we could reach this overall goal. 0:06:31.279 --> 0:06:33.359 So we have an overall financial goal, for example, and 0:06:33.400 --> 0:06:36.039 I brought like my leads and some of my thought 0:06:36.080 --> 0:06:37.760 leaders on the team, and they were like, what about this? 0:06:37.839 --> 0:06:39.800 What about that? And everyone got to say, well, based 0:06:39.880 --> 0:06:42.400 upon like George is the head of financials, based upon 0:06:42.480 --> 0:06:44.880 the financials, that might make sense, and Tam is head 0:06:44.880 --> 0:06:46.840 of LRA, but l Ray is going to need this, 0:06:47.279 --> 0:06:48.839 like logan is all content well. 0:06:48.720 --> 0:06:50.920 And content, So everybody got to kind of share. 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:53.480 And in the I kind of had in my head 0:06:53.720 --> 0:06:55.520 that the direction I thought we should go in in 0:06:55.600 --> 0:06:57.560 order to hit our income goal because since we fell 0:06:57.640 --> 0:06:59.520 so short last year, I had an idea in my head, 0:06:59.560 --> 0:07:01.960 but I told my I'm not sharing it into the end. 0:07:02.720 --> 0:07:04.960 And what we ended up with is not the idea 0:07:05.000 --> 0:07:07.160 I had in my head, not even ghosts. But it's 0:07:07.200 --> 0:07:11.080 way better and everyone's on board because we collectively decided 0:07:11.080 --> 0:07:13.520 this together. So it's not a Tiffney plan, it's a 0:07:13.560 --> 0:07:17.240 team plan because one they felt heard, two they feel supported, 0:07:17.480 --> 0:07:19.880 and they're like, I feel valued because this ain't even 0:07:19.920 --> 0:07:21.480 a plan that Tifney thart. We're going to do the 0:07:21.480 --> 0:07:24.560 plan that we've decided together. And now everybody is like go, 0:07:24.760 --> 0:07:28.160 Like I can see the uptick and energy because everyone's like, go, 0:07:28.160 --> 0:07:28.440 go go. 0:07:28.640 --> 0:07:29.960 We're working our plan. 0:07:30.560 --> 0:07:33.520 And so that was a suggestion that I gave is that, like, 0:07:33.880 --> 0:07:37.520 you know, wipe everything away, say this is the you know, 0:07:37.640 --> 0:07:40.680 like our lead has picked this core goal. 0:07:40.480 --> 0:07:42.440 For us to accomplish. How do you think we should 0:07:42.480 --> 0:07:43.080 accomplish it? 0:07:43.280 --> 0:07:46.400 And create a collective team plan and then what part 0:07:46.440 --> 0:07:47.440 of the plan do you want. 0:07:47.320 --> 0:07:48.360 To take team members? 0:07:48.360 --> 0:07:51.000 And everybody kind of picks their part, and then you 0:07:51.000 --> 0:07:54.200 know you might infuse if you want to fuse some 0:07:54.240 --> 0:07:57.520 of these tactical components here is the sheet that I 0:07:57.560 --> 0:07:59.880 created for us to keep track of the plan that 0:08:00.120 --> 0:08:02.640 is your you know, because that's her thing, and she's 0:08:02.680 --> 0:08:04.680 like really like organized, and that's one of the organizational 0:08:04.720 --> 0:08:07.040 tools she wants to introduce. So you can introduce this 0:08:07.160 --> 0:08:10.239 organizational tool into a team plan that's been collectively decided 0:08:10.280 --> 0:08:13.120 on and so yeah, So I just was like, so, 0:08:13.600 --> 0:08:14.960 I don't know, what are your thoughts, like, what have 0:08:15.000 --> 0:08:18.040 you seen this work in leadership versus management? And some 0:08:18.160 --> 0:08:20.640 mistakes maybe that you've made Mandy along the way. 0:08:21.080 --> 0:08:23.400 Yeah, I think I turned into a really brilliant leader 0:08:23.640 --> 0:08:25.800 by the end of my time in corporate. I'm just 0:08:25.840 --> 0:08:27.200 gonna say it. I love the way that I led. 0:08:27.240 --> 0:08:29.960 My team loved me, I loved him. We had respect. 0:08:30.000 --> 0:08:32.240 I gained it all. However I was. I had so 0:08:32.320 --> 0:08:36.240 many different experiences. I went from being able to build 0:08:36.240 --> 0:08:38.839 my team to then inheriting like twelve new people and 0:08:38.960 --> 0:08:42.040 an acquisition who were already suspicious of everything that my 0:08:42.120 --> 0:08:45.440 company was, including me. I've been younger than people that 0:08:45.480 --> 0:08:49.320 I've managed and you know, and dealt with that whole 0:08:49.400 --> 0:08:52.760 like age gap difference and building still managed to build 0:08:52.800 --> 0:08:54.400 respect in the way that I did it. I mean 0:08:54.640 --> 0:08:55.640 we don't have a ton of time to like go 0:08:55.640 --> 0:08:58.720 through all of that. But one of the first things 0:08:58.720 --> 0:09:00.600 that I the reason I asked, you know how long 0:09:00.640 --> 0:09:02.440 she's been there is you said about a few months 0:09:02.520 --> 0:09:05.880 or so. The first few months as a manager, you 0:09:05.880 --> 0:09:08.640 should be doing nothing but listening, setting up one on ones, 0:09:08.679 --> 0:09:14.040 building rapport understanding, not assuming that they are the reason 0:09:14.080 --> 0:09:16.920 that there's no good system and they're not being efficient, 0:09:17.640 --> 0:09:20.959 but letting them tell you why things are the way 0:09:20.960 --> 0:09:23.360 that they are, how do things currently run? Do You 0:09:23.400 --> 0:09:25.520 can't go in and just hear a story from your 0:09:25.559 --> 0:09:29.120 manager kind of summarizing everything. You need to like get 0:09:29.120 --> 0:09:31.600 in there in the trenches with them, and you can't 0:09:31.600 --> 0:09:33.160 make the assumption that they don't know what they're doing. 0:09:33.200 --> 0:09:35.360 They're already going to feel like you come in thinking 0:09:35.360 --> 0:09:38.360 that they're dumb dumbs. It kind of reminds me of 0:09:38.360 --> 0:09:40.559 like if you're steeing like the whole trope of like 0:09:40.679 --> 0:09:44.200 the white teacher going to like an underprivileged school and 0:09:44.240 --> 0:09:46.199 they I bet they walk in and make assumptions like, oh, 0:09:46.240 --> 0:09:50.559 these kids probably can't read or whatever, and that already 0:09:50.600 --> 0:09:53.040 makes the kids feel like shit. They're like, hey, it's 0:09:53.240 --> 0:09:55.600 that we are not intelligent. It's because these textbooks are 0:09:55.600 --> 0:09:57.720 ten years old and we don't get resources and all that. 0:09:57.840 --> 0:09:59.920 So you need to go in there and start for 0:10:00.200 --> 0:10:02.640 level of respect. They can earn it, but let's go 0:10:02.679 --> 0:10:04.640 ahead and give the benefit of the doubt. So going 0:10:04.760 --> 0:10:07.400 with trust, you have to also as far as a leader. 0:10:08.040 --> 0:10:12.920 Good leaders care about the ways that their employee's best work. 0:10:13.440 --> 0:10:16.280 And you may have workers who really don't care to 0:10:16.320 --> 0:10:18.240 be called on in a meeting for their feedback. They 0:10:18.280 --> 0:10:20.520 may want to think about feedback and write a team later. 0:10:20.679 --> 0:10:23.040 You have workers who are going to be the first 0:10:23.080 --> 0:10:24.520 to raise their hand and speak out. But then you 0:10:24.600 --> 0:10:26.800 got the folks who are more quiet, who can be overlooked. 0:10:26.800 --> 0:10:29.400 So I say get people by themselves and really get 0:10:29.440 --> 0:10:31.719 to know what they're going through. Because you've already done 0:10:31.800 --> 0:10:34.040 some damage in your first few months, I think that 0:10:34.160 --> 0:10:36.880 the first thing you should do is to have a 0:10:36.880 --> 0:10:40.400 big meeting to apologize and say, hey, I take ownership 0:10:40.440 --> 0:10:43.640 for kind of coming in with, you know, guns blazing 0:10:44.160 --> 0:10:46.160 and trying to make some changes. I want to do 0:10:46.200 --> 0:10:48.600 things differently and I need y'all's help. I'm gonna and 0:10:48.679 --> 0:10:50.000 tell them what you're going to do. I'm going to 0:10:50.200 --> 0:10:52.200 have you know, a half hour one on one with 0:10:52.200 --> 0:10:54.079 each of you guys individually. Then we're going to come 0:10:54.120 --> 0:10:56.160 and come together and have some touch points and have 0:10:56.200 --> 0:10:57.800 some meetings, and we are going to fix this as 0:10:57.840 --> 0:11:00.920 a team. I can't do it without you start from scratch, 0:11:01.000 --> 0:11:03.480 because you can't go back to your first impression. It 0:11:03.520 --> 0:11:06.240 was already a bad one. And you can't ask your 0:11:06.240 --> 0:11:08.240 supervisor to lay a hammer down. You want them to 0:11:08.240 --> 0:11:12.160 all quit, Go ahead, try that's what's going to happen. Yes, 0:11:12.640 --> 0:11:15.960 you need to take ownership yourself as a leader. You 0:11:16.000 --> 0:11:17.960 can't go to your bandager and ask them to fix 0:11:18.000 --> 0:11:20.160 things for you. They didn't hire you for that. They 0:11:20.200 --> 0:11:22.280 hired you to fix the problem for them, you know 0:11:22.320 --> 0:11:24.840 what I mean. You have to make them look good 0:11:24.840 --> 0:11:27.720 by fixing it, and your team has to make you 0:11:27.800 --> 0:11:32.280 look good, you know, implementing these new strategies. So that's 0:11:32.280 --> 0:11:35.040 your first Your first stop is your apology tour, and 0:11:36.240 --> 0:11:39.040 there's and you know what, it is not bad to apologize. 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:41.880 I it's never You're not going to lose their respect 0:11:41.960 --> 0:11:45.280 by not by apologizing and showing weakness. It I think 0:11:45.360 --> 0:11:47.120 is a sign of strength that you can admit when 0:11:47.120 --> 0:11:50.400 you were wrong and just ask for a new beginning 0:11:50.440 --> 0:11:51.280 and do things different. 0:11:51.920 --> 0:11:53.120 Yeah. 0:11:53.200 --> 0:11:55.360 Yeah, it's not easy because I think people don't realize that, like, 0:11:55.440 --> 0:11:57.600 leadership is not a bad I said this. 0:11:58.520 --> 0:12:00.760 It's like the reason why I was giggling is because 0:12:00.760 --> 0:12:02.720 it reminds me of me trying to like manage my 0:12:02.920 --> 0:12:07.080 four year old, Like he does not care to listen, 0:12:08.480 --> 0:12:11.000 and it's I try to you know, Me and Enrique 0:12:11.040 --> 0:12:13.680 were like dictators like no, you can't do that, No 0:12:13.760 --> 0:12:16.040 you can't do this, Sit here, sit there, And I'm like, 0:12:16.440 --> 0:12:20.000 now if when I'm really impatient, that's how I try 0:12:20.040 --> 0:12:20.480 to parent. 0:12:20.520 --> 0:12:21.400 And it does not work. 0:12:21.800 --> 0:12:25.480 Does not work because he's me and yeah, reincarnated as 0:12:25.520 --> 0:12:28.160 a four year old, and he's very stubborn and like, 0:12:28.360 --> 0:12:30.640 so I have to build his trust in other ways, 0:12:30.679 --> 0:12:33.600 like hey, let's yes first and then you know, so 0:12:33.840 --> 0:12:35.319 it's not unlike. 0:12:35.720 --> 0:12:37.040 Leadership is collaborative. 0:12:37.080 --> 0:12:38.959 That's the thing I think that you know, I think 0:12:39.000 --> 0:12:40.839 it's almost like it's almost like you know, when you're 0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:42.840 learning to like you think, well, you're gonna drive a car, 0:12:43.080 --> 0:12:44.800 You're you're steering, really think you go back and forth 0:12:44.800 --> 0:12:46.760 back or forth, back and forth. It's like, yeah, nobody 0:12:46.800 --> 0:12:48.760 drives a car like that. And so it's like some 0:12:48.800 --> 0:12:51.560 people think, like on the on the surface, if they 0:12:51.559 --> 0:12:53.680 see if I'm a far that leadership, they have a 0:12:53.679 --> 0:12:56.800 cartoon version of what they think leadership is, where it's like, oh, 0:12:56.840 --> 0:12:58.199 I'm the boss, you just do what I say. And 0:12:58.240 --> 0:13:00.280 it's like, yeah, no, in real life, it actually doesn't 0:13:00.280 --> 0:13:01.680 work that way, or people just won't work for you, 0:13:02.280 --> 0:13:04.640 or you'll get people who will stay because they have 0:13:04.679 --> 0:13:07.640 no place else to go because they're not good, but 0:13:07.679 --> 0:13:10.719 the good people will be gone. And truly good leadership 0:13:11.200 --> 0:13:15.200 gets people like excited. They feel autonomous. They know that 0:13:15.280 --> 0:13:17.040 you don't care as much about the how as long 0:13:17.080 --> 0:13:20.480 as it's done. You know, they feel like I'm collaboratively 0:13:20.520 --> 0:13:23.800 working with you to like get stuff done, and they're 0:13:23.840 --> 0:13:26.880 part of a larger goal, like there's a larger mission 0:13:26.880 --> 0:13:29.080 of foot in that and if they play a valuable 0:13:29.160 --> 0:13:32.800 role in making sure that mission happens. I'm reading like 0:13:32.840 --> 0:13:34.120 you know, like y'all know, I'm reading that ten X 0:13:34.240 --> 0:13:36.439 is greater than two. We's in chapter six it's all 0:13:36.480 --> 0:13:39.680 about creating a self managing team. And there was like, 0:13:39.720 --> 0:13:41.760 you know, just really great feedback about like what does 0:13:41.800 --> 0:13:43.880 it look like to be a really good leader. 0:13:43.840 --> 0:13:44.440 And so I had her. 0:13:44.520 --> 0:13:46.160 I was like, girl, don't read the best and just 0:13:46.160 --> 0:13:50.200 skip to chapter six. Not so hopefully I'll be able 0:13:50.200 --> 0:13:52.080 to give some updates about how it's going for her. 0:13:52.440 --> 0:13:53.280 Fingers crossed. 0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:53.920 That's the book. 0:13:53.960 --> 0:13:56.839 Recommendation is Dare to Lead by Brene Brown, the First 0:13:56.880 --> 0:13:58.839 ninety Days by I don't know who, just google it. 0:14:00.080 --> 0:14:01.280 I was one of the books I read when I 0:14:01.360 --> 0:14:07.040 joined my team. And anyway, Oh, and ask your boss 0:14:07.080 --> 0:14:11.760 for some professional development. Yeah, fund, find a conference, find 0:14:11.800 --> 0:14:16.000 a seminar. You guys, we're gonna take a quick break, Tiffany, 0:14:16.040 --> 0:14:16.760 does that sound good? 0:14:17.360 --> 0:14:18.960 And Dad have to plug in my computer because it's 0:14:18.960 --> 0:14:20.160 about to die, so in the. 0:14:20.080 --> 0:14:23.480 Meantime put it on life support. We'll be right back, 0:14:23.520 --> 0:14:31.080 BA fan with one more Q and one more A. Okay, 0:14:31.120 --> 0:14:34.800 BA Fan, we are back with another ooh, mysterious anonymous question, 0:14:36.200 --> 0:14:38.760 and so let's jump into it. Hey, I'm new to 0:14:38.800 --> 0:14:40.920 the pod and I love y'all. This is probably a 0:14:40.960 --> 0:14:44.240 dumb question, but my husband and I fight about money 0:14:44.280 --> 0:14:47.400 all the time. It's miserable. We have credit card debt 0:14:47.440 --> 0:14:49.200 we're paying off. But once we pay the debt off, 0:14:49.240 --> 0:14:52.360 then what do we do. Oh, oh, okay, we have 0:14:52.440 --> 0:14:54.440 credit card debt we're paying off. But once we pay 0:14:54.480 --> 0:14:57.120 it off, then what do we do? Combined? We make 0:14:57.160 --> 0:14:59.280 two hundred and fifty K a year, which I feel 0:14:59.280 --> 0:15:01.920 like is a lot of mone but we're constantly asking 0:15:01.960 --> 0:15:05.000 where does it all go when our debt is paid off? 0:15:05.000 --> 0:15:07.840 Do we get a CPA? Do we get a financial planner? 0:15:08.240 --> 0:15:10.800 We need help with everything from a budget to how 0:15:10.880 --> 0:15:13.200 much we should invest, to how much we should be saving. 0:15:13.800 --> 0:15:16.720 We need someone to tell it to us, like we're stupid. 0:15:17.040 --> 0:15:20.520 Where do we start when the debt is paid off? Thanks? 0:15:23.120 --> 0:15:24.080 This is so real. 0:15:24.680 --> 0:15:28.080 Yes, I love this. We need someone to tell like 0:15:28.120 --> 0:15:28.720 we're stupid. 0:15:28.800 --> 0:15:33.680 Well, obviously you guys are not stupid, you know, but 0:15:33.880 --> 0:15:36.520 I remember maybe you were telling me, like a long 0:15:36.560 --> 0:15:38.840 time ago, when you had hired Helen and your financial planner. 0:15:39.040 --> 0:15:41.040 She was like the tie breaker, you were like, and 0:15:41.080 --> 0:15:44.440 sometimes she would side with the rika. You're like, oh wow, girl. 0:15:44.800 --> 0:15:48.440 Sister planner. Yes, that's exactly what I was speaking. 0:15:48.520 --> 0:15:50.200 It's fine once in a while, they're going to have 0:15:50.280 --> 0:15:51.520 to give the guy a win, you. 0:15:51.480 --> 0:15:52.080 Know what I'm saying. 0:15:52.800 --> 0:15:54.880 I think even she knew that. Let me let Enrique 0:15:54.920 --> 0:16:00.560 feel included, but you will get nowhere to get like you. 0:16:01.480 --> 0:16:03.880 I always have this analogy of like me and Rique. 0:16:03.920 --> 0:16:06.960 Sometimes it's like we are holding hands while we're each 0:16:07.000 --> 0:16:09.280 trying to go different directions at a crossroads, like we're 0:16:09.280 --> 0:16:12.480 constantly and we're just like yanking each other like this way, No, 0:16:12.600 --> 0:16:13.280 it's this way. 0:16:13.360 --> 0:16:13.640 I know. 0:16:13.840 --> 0:16:16.760 You know, you get absolutely nowhere. You just do you 0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:18.920 feel like dumb dumbs, which is how you feel, and 0:16:18.920 --> 0:16:22.600 that's how I've felt many times. Financial planners help so 0:16:22.720 --> 0:16:28.760 much because they are objective. Yea, yeah, objective, and they 0:16:28.960 --> 0:16:32.480 can help. It feels so much less like, so much 0:16:32.520 --> 0:16:35.280 less fraught and there's no blame. You know, they're just 0:16:35.280 --> 0:16:37.880 looking at the facts. And I think that would be 0:16:37.960 --> 0:16:40.840 completely helpful to you in addition to a financial planner, 0:16:41.000 --> 0:16:44.240 like reading books on your own, yeah, can be really 0:16:44.280 --> 0:16:48.240 helpful for your education. Tiffany's book is like the foundation 0:16:48.880 --> 0:16:50.840 that I feel like it sounds like you need and 0:16:50.880 --> 0:16:53.360 you're part with money, Get it with money dot Com. 0:16:53.400 --> 0:16:57.160 Get that book, then get the workbook. You know, if 0:16:57.200 --> 0:16:59.920 you're anything like my husband or your husband's like mine, 0:17:00.200 --> 0:17:01.880 you're gonna be the one who wants to read books 0:17:01.920 --> 0:17:05.240 and he's like I'll red it stuff, read and find 0:17:05.240 --> 0:17:08.920 out about investment. But you have your style. He has 0:17:08.960 --> 0:17:11.960 his just trust with the financial planner that it will 0:17:11.960 --> 0:17:13.479 help lead you guys in the right direction. 0:17:14.240 --> 0:17:17.640 You go right And I say this that like yeah, 0:17:17.680 --> 0:17:21.119 so introducing someone to help kind of like God, just 0:17:21.119 --> 0:17:21.280 do it. 0:17:21.280 --> 0:17:22.000 And here's the thing. 0:17:22.000 --> 0:17:23.800 You don't have to wait until the debt is gone, 0:17:24.480 --> 0:17:25.680 like you can start next. 0:17:26.000 --> 0:17:27.640 I know you said, what are we doing? We're debt free. 0:17:27.880 --> 0:17:29.720 Since you don't have to wait, you can start to 0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:32.840 look for So I have I partner with this organization 0:17:33.320 --> 0:17:34.840 called wealth Ram. 0:17:34.920 --> 0:17:36.560 I think it's called But if you go to is 0:17:36.560 --> 0:17:38.280 it your money match, I'll always forget. 0:17:38.760 --> 0:17:40.520 So the way it works because a lot of people 0:17:40.560 --> 0:17:42.199 ask where do you find Well, there's a bunch of places, 0:17:42.200 --> 0:17:44.760 but I like the wealth Ramp your money match. Let 0:17:44.760 --> 0:17:47.080 me just make sure that that's what the name of 0:17:47.119 --> 0:17:51.480 the side is. Your money mets dot com. 0:17:50.000 --> 0:17:52.919 Your money match dot com. Let's see if it comes. 0:17:53.240 --> 0:17:54.600 Your money that's wealth Ramp. 0:17:55.640 --> 0:17:57.960 Yes, I don't think it's your money match. 0:18:00.080 --> 0:18:00.920 It's called money match. 0:18:01.560 --> 0:18:04.320 I did so your money mess dot com is like, 0:18:04.359 --> 0:18:06.000 so if you go to your money mess dot com, 0:18:06.160 --> 0:18:09.520 I partner with this company that if you like, you 0:18:09.600 --> 0:18:11.879 fill out some like you know, questions that you and 0:18:11.920 --> 0:18:13.760 your your partner will fill out or you can do 0:18:13.760 --> 0:18:16.040 them by yourself or whatever, and they will match you 0:18:16.080 --> 0:18:18.760 based upon what you say to up to three different 0:18:18.800 --> 0:18:20.520 financial certified financial planners. 0:18:20.520 --> 0:18:22.000 That was critical. That's why I partner with them. 0:18:22.280 --> 0:18:26.000 Certified financial planners are the gold standard of financial planners, 0:18:26.240 --> 0:18:29.000