1 00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:21,080 Speaker 1: Hey, and welcome to What Future. I'm your host, Joshua Topolski, 2 00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:23,759 Speaker 1: and I gotta say, you know, I had a long 3 00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:26,520 Speaker 1: intro where I was going to talk about my feelings 4 00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:32,000 Speaker 1: on the Barbie trailer and how I feel about what 5 00:00:32,040 --> 00:00:36,320 Speaker 1: Gretti Gerway has done with the Barbie character and the 6 00:00:36,360 --> 00:00:42,279 Speaker 1: Internet's reaction to Barbie and Ken and all of the memes. 7 00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:45,480 Speaker 1: There were so many memes. But I ended up having 8 00:00:45,520 --> 00:00:49,239 Speaker 1: an amazing conversation with the actor Bex Taylor Klaus, who 9 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:51,200 Speaker 1: you may have seen in things like Thirteen Reasons Why 10 00:00:51,280 --> 00:00:53,920 Speaker 1: or the Scream TV series, and we had this sprawling, 11 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:59,000 Speaker 1: super fascinating conversation that ended in a very interesting discussion 12 00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:00,920 Speaker 1: of gaming and men any forms. And so I don't 13 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:02,880 Speaker 1: want to waste any time, you know, talking about the 14 00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:06,840 Speaker 1: Barbie trailer or any other trailers. Frankly, I just want 15 00:01:06,880 --> 00:01:10,000 Speaker 1: to get into this conversation, so let's not waste one 16 00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:29,120 Speaker 1: more minute. And so your last name is pronounced. I 17 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:32,240 Speaker 1: don't want to say it right, Claus Taylor Klaus, wrong 18 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:34,600 Speaker 1: us clouds. You don't want to say it right. You 19 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:36,880 Speaker 1: want to say get up right off the perfect I 20 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:39,959 Speaker 1: want to say it Laus Klauses. But that's more. That 21 00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:43,959 Speaker 1: sounds like I like a German villain and a not you. 22 00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 1: But I'm if I say it like that, I have 23 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 1: to put myself in the mindspace of a person with 24 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:50,960 Speaker 1: a German accent. Oh yeah, it's great. Is it a 25 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:55,200 Speaker 1: German name? It is. Purportedly we changed it from something 26 00:01:55,480 --> 00:01:58,880 Speaker 1: super Jewish to try to sound a little bit more 27 00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:01,720 Speaker 1: assimilated and under the radar when we came over here. 28 00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:07,040 Speaker 1: I wish my family had done that. Look, we're just 29 00:02:07,080 --> 00:02:09,000 Speaker 1: gonna keep it to Pulsky. That should be fine. No 30 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:13,200 Speaker 1: one will have any problems with that spelling or pronunciation. Meanwhile, 31 00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:15,080 Speaker 1: your family was like, just cut it down, we need 32 00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:17,760 Speaker 1: like a single syllable something that is kind of a 33 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:21,560 Speaker 1: little bit. Klaus could be anything. And then the other 34 00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:24,800 Speaker 1: side had Grossman, so they were very short, so it 35 00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:28,360 Speaker 1: didn't make any sense. Yeah, that's a tough one. I 36 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:32,000 Speaker 1: don't know. It's funny. My wife is a huge genealogy 37 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 1: I mean, I think she's actually a professional technically speaking, 38 00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:37,480 Speaker 1: but she does it as a hobby. So she knows 39 00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:40,680 Speaker 1: everything about my family and everything about people who who 40 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:43,080 Speaker 1: have come to this country, and all of has all 41 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,280 Speaker 1: these crazy records of people coming from Eastern Europe and 42 00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:49,080 Speaker 1: all over the world, and oh my god, it's crazy. 43 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:52,639 Speaker 1: And there is this persistent rumor that, oh, my family 44 00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 1: got to Ellis Island and they couldn't spell their name, 45 00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:58,280 Speaker 1: or they misheard it, or they didn't understand. But a 46 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:00,880 Speaker 1: lot moten have a favorite joke about that. Right now, 47 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:03,400 Speaker 1: do you wait? Are you to tell me? Oh? Absolutely 48 00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:05,440 Speaker 1: if you want to hear it when you're done. But 49 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:08,160 Speaker 1: the only timey thing is that, apparently, in most cases, 50 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:11,079 Speaker 1: the real story is that people were like, oh, I 51 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:13,040 Speaker 1: got to America. I can now change my name from 52 00:03:13,080 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 1: something that will not be easy to assimilate to something 53 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:19,440 Speaker 1: that will be easier for people to like say, or 54 00:03:19,560 --> 00:03:21,400 Speaker 1: you know here, or just and just be like, okay, 55 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:23,639 Speaker 1: you're an American or whatever. So there's a lot of 56 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:25,720 Speaker 1: people changing their own names. But anyhow, let me hear it. 57 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:30,560 Speaker 1: Let me hear your joke. A rabbi said this, and 58 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:34,359 Speaker 1: I've been obsessed with it ever since. Two guys coming 59 00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:37,360 Speaker 1: over on Ellis Island. They're in the line and one 60 00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:39,040 Speaker 1: of them goes, so have you chosen your name yet? 61 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 1: And the other guys go, what come again? Now, the 62 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:44,840 Speaker 1: guy explains, it's like you want to change your name 63 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:48,320 Speaker 1: so it sounds less conspicuous. Let's jewish all these things. 64 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:52,320 Speaker 1: So what's your name, Jacob Gottlieb. Okay, let's come up 65 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:59,360 Speaker 1: with something, maybe Jake Shaw. Sure. The guy in front 66 00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:01,040 Speaker 1: of him goes it was his name that gets up 67 00:04:01,040 --> 00:04:05,280 Speaker 1: to his time and he goes hoop shinea Ferguson, which 68 00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:09,040 Speaker 1: in Yiddish means I've already forgotten. And the guy goes, 69 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:16,320 Speaker 1: all right, welcome to America, Sean Ferguson. That's good, that's good. 70 00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:20,719 Speaker 1: That's a real Jewish joke. That's a real like classic. 71 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:22,680 Speaker 1: Not only a rabbi could tell that, Joe, only a 72 00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:24,960 Speaker 1: rabbi in you could tell that. And of course the 73 00:04:25,040 --> 00:04:29,880 Speaker 1: rabbi manages to make this entire speech about how have 74 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:34,120 Speaker 1: we already forgotten? How we were treated, how we treat others? Beautiful, 75 00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:38,839 Speaker 1: beautiful sermon starts with the most the most Jewish jew 76 00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:41,120 Speaker 1: joke I've ever heard. Oh that's the opening, that's the 77 00:04:41,160 --> 00:04:44,839 Speaker 1: opening to that. That's so interesting. I actually wanted to 78 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:47,960 Speaker 1: ask you about this. You're Jewish, you were raised Jewish? 79 00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:50,760 Speaker 1: I was raised Jewish. Are you are you a practicing Jew? 80 00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:55,080 Speaker 1: I am? I'm the kind of jew that gets anxious 81 00:04:55,360 --> 00:04:59,520 Speaker 1: when I'm not doing the satyr and my family is 82 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:02,560 Speaker 1: not doing the Sator. But if my family's doing the sata, 83 00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 1: it's fine for me not to be doing the sata 84 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:06,000 Speaker 1: because I just get to say amen from the other 85 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:08,640 Speaker 1: side of the country. Right. We had to bail on 86 00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:11,160 Speaker 1: our stata because my wife is very sick and basically 87 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:15,799 Speaker 1: nobody eats meat, but for Passover we'll get brisket because 88 00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:19,479 Speaker 1: you know it's Passover, it's a requirement. I usually am like, Okay, 89 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:22,200 Speaker 1: I'll eat sonka if I have to, I'll eat some brisket, 90 00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 1: I guess. And we got five pounds of brisket we 91 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,680 Speaker 1: ordered from this place around here. That's so it's so good, amazing, 92 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:31,720 Speaker 1: And then we had to cancel the satyr. So I've 93 00:05:31,760 --> 00:05:34,480 Speaker 1: just been working my way through five pounds of brisket personally, 94 00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:37,120 Speaker 1: like literally nobody else in the family eats it. So 95 00:05:37,120 --> 00:05:38,720 Speaker 1: so I think out what I've been doing with our 96 00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:41,000 Speaker 1: three pounds of brisket. Yeah, it's like it's like we're 97 00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:42,919 Speaker 1: like a weekend. I'm like, I'm not sure this is 98 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:45,680 Speaker 1: even like I can still eat this, but it's safe, 99 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:49,159 Speaker 1: don't care. Yeah, no, I mean it tastes okay, So 100 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,720 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna roll with it until something seems funny. 101 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:54,920 Speaker 1: But you're from Atlanta, you were raised in Atlanta? Is 102 00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:59,240 Speaker 1: that correct? Born and raised in Atlanta. So I don't 103 00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,680 Speaker 1: meet a lot of Southern Jews, like I don't meet 104 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:04,760 Speaker 1: a lot of people who are both like from the 105 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:08,120 Speaker 1: southern region. We can safely consider Atlanta southern, right, I mean, 106 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:11,080 Speaker 1: it's definitely it's of all the southern, of many of 107 00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:15,200 Speaker 1: the southern places. It feels like it's pretty fucking progressive, 108 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:20,320 Speaker 1: comparatively little blue gem on the buckle of the Bible belt. Right. 109 00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:23,040 Speaker 1: But I mean, what was that like growing up in 110 00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:25,800 Speaker 1: the South as a Jew Because, like my experience is 111 00:06:25,839 --> 00:06:29,640 Speaker 1: I grew up in Pittsburgh, which is a huge Jewish population, 112 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:32,360 Speaker 1: so I was like around Jewish people all the time, 113 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:37,479 Speaker 1: even though I rejected God ultimately. But um, that's my 114 00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:40,000 Speaker 1: favorite thing about Judaism is you get to be an 115 00:06:40,040 --> 00:06:44,039 Speaker 1: agnostic or an atheist jew and it's you're still like, 116 00:06:44,040 --> 00:06:46,600 Speaker 1: there's no escape me. It's like, yeah, that's social Jewish 117 00:06:46,600 --> 00:06:48,280 Speaker 1: part of it just gets like seeped in and then 118 00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:51,240 Speaker 1: you're yeah, and it's almost like a religious requirement to 119 00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:54,240 Speaker 1: question the very existence of God at a base level, 120 00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:58,359 Speaker 1: so like, yeah, it's chill. Yeah, no, you're definitely like 121 00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:01,200 Speaker 1: a real Like I remember talking to my mom about God, 122 00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:02,839 Speaker 1: you know, because I started when I was a kid. 123 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:05,040 Speaker 1: I started to go like, this doesn't making a lot 124 00:07:05,080 --> 00:07:06,760 Speaker 1: of sense to me. People are talking a lot about God, 125 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:09,159 Speaker 1: but I kind of don't believe it. And I was like, 126 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:11,720 Speaker 1: what's what it is? God? What is Who's God? And 127 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:15,040 Speaker 1: my Mom's like, God is everything, God is the trees, 128 00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:16,840 Speaker 1: God is there. I'm like, okay, so you don't really 129 00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:20,480 Speaker 1: buy it either, like you're kind of like God exactly. 130 00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:22,800 Speaker 1: She wasn't like, oh, well, the God is in heaven 131 00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:27,800 Speaker 1: and does you know gave the commandments and anyhow, it's nebulous. 132 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,120 Speaker 1: It's weird. It's a bush that is on fire and 133 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:33,480 Speaker 1: continues to be on fire. It's weird. It's it's so weird. 134 00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:36,880 Speaker 1: But so what was that like in the South, Because, um, 135 00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:39,040 Speaker 1: you know, especially if you're like if you're you know, 136 00:07:39,200 --> 00:07:41,520 Speaker 1: practice practicing jew and you've had a Jewish family, I'm 137 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:43,760 Speaker 1: just so curious And maybe it's a stupid question. Maybe 138 00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:45,160 Speaker 1: it's like there are a million Jews in the South, 139 00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:46,760 Speaker 1: and I'm just I haven't met any of them. There 140 00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:48,680 Speaker 1: are no stupid question. Well, I don't know. I bet 141 00:07:48,720 --> 00:07:50,520 Speaker 1: I could come up with it. I have a feeling 142 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:52,640 Speaker 1: I could come up with a few stupid questions. But like, 143 00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:55,480 Speaker 1: was that was that weird? Were you ostracized as as 144 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:58,720 Speaker 1: a as a Jew in um what would be considered 145 00:07:58,720 --> 00:08:02,520 Speaker 1: a very Christian area, Yes, and no. I grew up 146 00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:06,880 Speaker 1: with a thriving, bustling Jewish community. The resurgence of the 147 00:08:06,960 --> 00:08:11,320 Speaker 1: KKK and the American South happened in I think the 148 00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:15,720 Speaker 1: sixties with the lynching of a Jewish man named Leo Frank. So, 149 00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:21,640 Speaker 1: to be fair, it's scary there. My cousin's synagogue, a 150 00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:25,880 Speaker 1: very established synagogue, has at least one bomb threat a week, 151 00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:31,960 Speaker 1: and they just continue because that's the norm. And at 152 00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:34,520 Speaker 1: the same time I did. I grew up with a 153 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:39,959 Speaker 1: thriving and bustling Jewish community sprawling across Atlanta. See, as 154 00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:43,360 Speaker 1: long as you're inside the perimeter, it's called IP inside 155 00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:47,240 Speaker 1: the perimeter, and OTP is outside the perimeter. Atlanta is 156 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:51,680 Speaker 1: surrounded by highway and that's called the perimeter. Right once 157 00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:55,840 Speaker 1: you're outside the perimeter, it's Scaryville, USA is outside the perimeter, 158 00:08:55,960 --> 00:09:01,240 Speaker 1: like very rural, is it very country? Some parts? It's 159 00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:06,520 Speaker 1: also like there's areas outside the perimeter that are just fancy, 160 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:10,160 Speaker 1: rich white town, and then there's also a town that's 161 00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:15,720 Speaker 1: just all country, all acreage, all run down gas stations. 162 00:09:15,760 --> 00:09:19,160 Speaker 1: It's right, once you get outside the perimeter, it's it's 163 00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:23,760 Speaker 1: the eclectic nature of Georgia again, Like you went from 164 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,360 Speaker 1: scary to eclectic, which I think is a real look, 165 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:30,640 Speaker 1: very very savvay charming depending on what you look like. 166 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:35,760 Speaker 1: You're like suddenly it could be charming and beautiful depending 167 00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:38,480 Speaker 1: on how much privilege you have, right, I mean, you know, 168 00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:40,559 Speaker 1: it's it's always interesting because I'm for me like, well, 169 00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:44,240 Speaker 1: I'm a white guy, right, that's I'm a white guy. Yeah, yeah, 170 00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:46,240 Speaker 1: I feel like people And this is true because like 171 00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:48,079 Speaker 1: in New York, you know, there's there will be Jewish 172 00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:49,160 Speaker 1: guys that come up to me and are like, do 173 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:50,800 Speaker 1: you want to dove in with us? Do you want 174 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:52,280 Speaker 1: to you know, it's like during the holidays, they'll just 175 00:09:52,280 --> 00:09:54,040 Speaker 1: walk up to you and be like, well you're Jewish, right, 176 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:58,160 Speaker 1: And I'm like, first off, that's and I'm like that's 177 00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:03,400 Speaker 1: anti Semitic, and yes I am Jewish. Actually both correct 178 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:08,000 Speaker 1: and defensive. I both resemble and resent that totally. But 179 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,839 Speaker 1: but yeah, I mean I think so I have a 180 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:14,240 Speaker 1: my bar for you know, when things get scary, it's 181 00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:17,280 Speaker 1: probably different. Right. But so you were inside and you 182 00:10:17,320 --> 00:10:20,360 Speaker 1: were in a community of other Jewish people. Did you 183 00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:24,840 Speaker 1: ever firsthand experience anti Semitism? There was there ever any like? 184 00:10:24,920 --> 00:10:28,000 Speaker 1: Could you feel it? Could you see it? Absolutely? The 185 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:30,959 Speaker 1: KKK was alive and well outside the perimeter. I would 186 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:36,319 Speaker 1: travel for rural softball games and you know, pass not 187 00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:41,560 Speaker 1: just Confederate flags, but like blatant Nazism out there. It's 188 00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:44,720 Speaker 1: it's yeah, I guess this. I sound so naive, but 189 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:46,400 Speaker 1: I you know, grew up in a place where I mean, 190 00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:48,680 Speaker 1: I can tell you in my life I've never don't 191 00:10:48,679 --> 00:10:51,280 Speaker 1: think I've ever been in the same room or on 192 00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:55,000 Speaker 1: the same street with somebody who was like a clan member, 193 00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:57,200 Speaker 1: like as far as I know, I mean, you know, 194 00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:59,120 Speaker 1: like I don't know, have you you saw people like 195 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:01,480 Speaker 1: in the road. I didn't grow up on the same 196 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:04,240 Speaker 1: street as like a clan member, but I did grow 197 00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:08,720 Speaker 1: up on the same neighborhood as a guy who had 198 00:11:08,880 --> 00:11:16,000 Speaker 1: a Confederate flag lanyard and black family that didn't hang 199 00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:18,120 Speaker 1: out with us once they found out we were Jewish 200 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:23,119 Speaker 1: and not Christian. Oh really, it's a very strange reality 201 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:27,480 Speaker 1: in Atlanta to get bought insane tolerance and insane just 202 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:32,440 Speaker 1: like cognitive dissonance. Yeah, that's wild. I mean it is interesting. 203 00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:35,480 Speaker 1: I will say this, like I was talking to somebody, 204 00:11:35,679 --> 00:11:38,800 Speaker 1: a non Jew recently. I was explaining how Jews people 205 00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 1: love Seltzer, and I don't know if this is I 206 00:11:40,559 --> 00:11:45,760 Speaker 1: believe that this is true in my life experience. Everybody 207 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:48,840 Speaker 1: in my family was like not just like I enjoy 208 00:11:49,320 --> 00:11:54,559 Speaker 1: sparkling water, but like obsessed with Seltzer and and he 209 00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:57,160 Speaker 1: was surprised to hear that this was the thing amongst Jews. 210 00:11:57,440 --> 00:11:59,720 Speaker 1: Are you Are you a Seltzer fan? Was your family 211 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:03,280 Speaker 1: into Seltzer out of curiosity? Oh yeah yeah big time, 212 00:12:03,559 --> 00:12:08,040 Speaker 1: like soda streams and as well as like favorite brands 213 00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:10,840 Speaker 1: for like when we're too lazy, and then like a 214 00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:14,239 Speaker 1: system for the soda streams to have cool water ready 215 00:12:14,679 --> 00:12:16,439 Speaker 1: to put it. I get the cold water you have. 216 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:18,920 Speaker 1: But see, it's interesting. That's like one of those things 217 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,840 Speaker 1: that like you can meet a kind of a Jew anywhere, 218 00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,560 Speaker 1: and that it's just one of those things that's just like, 219 00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:25,640 Speaker 1: oh yeah, the Seltzer thing or whatever. You know, It's 220 00:12:25,679 --> 00:12:28,880 Speaker 1: it's weird because there's so few Jews. It's not like 221 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:30,920 Speaker 1: there's none of us, but they're actually on the planet. 222 00:12:30,920 --> 00:12:32,760 Speaker 1: Are not very many Jews if you just look at 223 00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:35,680 Speaker 1: the numbers, the raw numbers, and people got wiped out 224 00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:38,920 Speaker 1: and the population just never recovered. Yeah, and it's a 225 00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:41,120 Speaker 1: really really small number. But like I do feel like, 226 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:42,880 Speaker 1: I mean, you see this, like you know, the ship 227 00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:44,640 Speaker 1: with like Kanye or whatever, and it's like, okay, well, 228 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:48,920 Speaker 1: there's this persistent idea that Jews are like really super 229 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,800 Speaker 1: duper important and that has just like never stopped being 230 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:54,040 Speaker 1: a thing amongst like a you know, certain people for 231 00:12:54,080 --> 00:12:57,480 Speaker 1: certain people who already are inclined not to like us. 232 00:12:57,520 --> 00:13:01,360 Speaker 1: But but it's funny because it does feel like there's 233 00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:04,880 Speaker 1: these things that are the very cultural and knowable even 234 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:06,960 Speaker 1: if you're not religious, like like I am like a 235 00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:09,720 Speaker 1: very you know, very atheistic Jew. Like I feel like 236 00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:12,160 Speaker 1: you and I have things that some basis for our 237 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:15,680 Speaker 1: relationship here that we don't even need to have to establish. 238 00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 1: But I was fascinating when I heard that because I 239 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:19,200 Speaker 1: don't know, I don't think I know a single Jew 240 00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:21,360 Speaker 1: from the South. I think that's you. Maybe the first 241 00:13:21,440 --> 00:13:23,760 Speaker 1: Jew from the South that I'm I'm getting to know, 242 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:27,480 Speaker 1: which seems weird, but I don't know, it does, doesn't it? 243 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:32,880 Speaker 1: In classic Jewish fashion? My uncle is the guy who 244 00:13:33,360 --> 00:13:36,400 Speaker 1: ran the Kansas City JCC when it got shut up. 245 00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:41,080 Speaker 1: Oh wow, during the Obama administration. That's crazy. So like classics, 246 00:13:41,280 --> 00:13:45,319 Speaker 1: small world? Yeah, whose especially you know in that sort 247 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:52,000 Speaker 1: of zone of what feels to be claimed, Yeah by 248 00:13:52,440 --> 00:14:06,040 Speaker 1: a different religion. How long have you been acting? When 249 00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:09,280 Speaker 1: did you start? You were young, fresh out the womb. 250 00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:11,640 Speaker 1: I decided that I wanted to be Dorothy from the 251 00:14:11,679 --> 00:14:14,880 Speaker 1: Wizard of Oz and decided that everyone in my family 252 00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:17,560 Speaker 1: was just in this with me. They were just so 253 00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:19,640 Speaker 1: long for the ride. They were just along for the ride. 254 00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:22,360 Speaker 1: And you couldn't call me anything but Dorothy. Really. Yeah, 255 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:26,040 Speaker 1: how young were you? I was too? Oh wow, I 256 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:28,360 Speaker 1: was too. And that lasted for like a year and 257 00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:31,120 Speaker 1: a half or something ridiculous like that. I truly I 258 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:34,120 Speaker 1: saw the Wizard of Oz, I decided I was Dorothy, 259 00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:37,640 Speaker 1: and everybody else had to deal with that. I mean, 260 00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:39,960 Speaker 1: I completely understand that I have a daughter named Zelda. 261 00:14:40,120 --> 00:14:41,880 Speaker 1: I love that name. Thank you. She's been obsessed with 262 00:14:41,920 --> 00:14:45,160 Speaker 1: Annie since I mean my wife and I showed it 263 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:49,160 Speaker 1: to her when she was two probably or three or something, 264 00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:51,160 Speaker 1: and just basically he's been obsessed with it. And now 265 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:53,760 Speaker 1: as like a theater kid is like, yeah, does all 266 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:56,240 Speaker 1: these musicals and is into things that I never thought 267 00:14:56,280 --> 00:14:58,240 Speaker 1: I would I would learn about, Like are you familiar 268 00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:02,960 Speaker 1: with the franchise the Zombies, Franchi? I am now official, 269 00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:08,320 Speaker 1: I have nieces and nephews. I love it so like, 270 00:15:08,360 --> 00:15:10,000 Speaker 1: not only do I know all the songs from Annie 271 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:13,240 Speaker 1: and like the Matilda musical and oh my god, I 272 00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:15,400 Speaker 1: love the Matilda musical. Oh my god, so it's so good, 273 00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:17,880 Speaker 1: so insane and uh and just all this like like 274 00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:21,960 Speaker 1: Wicked and whatever. But then also now because they basically 275 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:24,120 Speaker 1: was like, oh yeah, kids love musicals, so we should 276 00:15:24,160 --> 00:15:28,040 Speaker 1: just make those zombies incredible. I've learned so much about 277 00:15:28,200 --> 00:15:31,840 Speaker 1: the zombie universe thanks to her. But there's something some people, 278 00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:36,640 Speaker 1: I am the parent of one, something just clicks in 279 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:40,240 Speaker 1: a way that is like overwhelming. Did you feel that way, 280 00:15:40,320 --> 00:15:42,120 Speaker 1: like like obviously when you were a little kid, it's 281 00:15:42,120 --> 00:15:45,280 Speaker 1: like hard to gauge, but like you kept doing it right, Yeah, 282 00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:47,920 Speaker 1: my parents figured that in the long run, just starting 283 00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:50,080 Speaker 1: to put me in acting classes and camps might be 284 00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:54,200 Speaker 1: cheaper than therapy. It wasn't, because I still needed therapy. 285 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:55,760 Speaker 1: I was gonna say, I don't know if that's those 286 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:59,520 Speaker 1: are no equivalent. It didn't work. They just spent more money, 287 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:03,640 Speaker 1: and now I'm trying to make money off of it, right, Okay, Well, 288 00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:06,520 Speaker 1: and you've done it. You're making money off you're in. Yeah, 289 00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:09,800 Speaker 1: you're in a ton of stuff. But maybe there was 290 00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:11,560 Speaker 1: never a question. But was there a moment for you 291 00:16:11,560 --> 00:16:14,880 Speaker 1: where you're like, Okay, I can make this like a life. 292 00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:20,000 Speaker 1: Well I'd I'd done you know, camps and stuff and 293 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:23,640 Speaker 1: absolutely loved it. But I was a jock and I 294 00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:26,680 Speaker 1: thought I was going to be doing softball. And then 295 00:16:26,880 --> 00:16:31,520 Speaker 1: there was this sort of casting call thing, an ad 296 00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:34,920 Speaker 1: for It was like, here, come for a free audition 297 00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:38,160 Speaker 1: for Adrian Armante and Phil Lewis from Disney Channel to 298 00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,680 Speaker 1: teach you if you have any interest in learning how 299 00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:44,840 Speaker 1: to be like them, and my brain, not knowing that 300 00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:49,240 Speaker 1: auditions are always supposed to be free, went oh, free, 301 00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:54,120 Speaker 1: let's do that. Like what a deal, right? What a steel? 302 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:58,280 Speaker 1: I got me? I'm sold? And so we went and 303 00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,440 Speaker 1: I'm like, there's no cost to the us, and they 304 00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:03,160 Speaker 1: were like, well, if if we like you and your audition, 305 00:17:03,360 --> 00:17:06,040 Speaker 1: then you got to pay us to train you. I'm like, oh, 306 00:17:06,119 --> 00:17:08,560 Speaker 1: that makes more sense. But at that point we just 307 00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:11,520 Speaker 1: we did our little auditions and Phil Lewis pulled my 308 00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:14,920 Speaker 1: parents to the side and said, don't let this kid 309 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:18,879 Speaker 1: skip school, but also don't let this kid stop doing this. 310 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,040 Speaker 1: And that was sort of the first time that for 311 00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:25,680 Speaker 1: any of us we were like, we're are you for real? 312 00:17:26,320 --> 00:17:31,080 Speaker 1: No shit? Okay? Yeah, And even then I was still 313 00:17:31,160 --> 00:17:34,879 Speaker 1: kind of not taking it completely seriously, even during this 314 00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:39,000 Speaker 1: training process, until Giovanni Samuel's of Disney Channel of Fame. 315 00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:41,800 Speaker 1: We were goofing off in her class and she kind 316 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:44,800 Speaker 1: of snapped us to reality and read us the Riot Act. 317 00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:47,040 Speaker 1: It was like, people are paying money for you to 318 00:17:47,119 --> 00:17:49,720 Speaker 1: do this, and you have a chance to make a 319 00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:54,680 Speaker 1: return on that as long as you don't keep dicking around. Right. 320 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:59,480 Speaker 1: I heard it, I listened, and she kind of brought 321 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:02,320 Speaker 1: me back to brought me to reality, a reality I 322 00:18:02,359 --> 00:18:06,720 Speaker 1: had never sort of considered. And then from there it 323 00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:10,560 Speaker 1: was sort of that moment of like, I mean, still 324 00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:15,760 Speaker 1: a maybe, but worth the trying sort of thing. Yeah, 325 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:17,679 Speaker 1: Like I mean, listen, I know there are a lot 326 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,480 Speaker 1: of people who do lots of fearless things, but I 327 00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:23,920 Speaker 1: am like kind of in awe of the capability of 328 00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:28,960 Speaker 1: someone with your talent to be able to inhabit a role, 329 00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:30,960 Speaker 1: even if it's very serious, or if it can be 330 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:33,679 Speaker 1: very kind of fun and silly or whatever. Just like 331 00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:36,840 Speaker 1: that ability too. I feel like I'm I don't think 332 00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:39,280 Speaker 1: I'm a very self conscious person exactly, but I feel 333 00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:41,320 Speaker 1: like there's a certain level of I don't know, my 334 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:45,560 Speaker 1: brain would prevent me from letting go completely. And I think, 335 00:18:45,640 --> 00:18:48,119 Speaker 1: I don't know what is that. Is there a moment 336 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:51,280 Speaker 1: where you are able to just inhabit this other space 337 00:18:51,320 --> 00:18:54,360 Speaker 1: where you're not thinking about who you are and what 338 00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:56,840 Speaker 1: people are thinking and how that could be perceived, and 339 00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:58,920 Speaker 1: you're just in that thing or is it like, how 340 00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:02,000 Speaker 1: do you get there? I think I spent my whole 341 00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:09,399 Speaker 1: life sort of trying to figure out how to respond 342 00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:13,760 Speaker 1: to every situation the way that other people did. Yeah, 343 00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:21,359 Speaker 1: sort of you know, neurodivergent masking thing or a divergent seeing, copying, adapting, 344 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:28,640 Speaker 1: and imitating. And I think that I just seemed to 345 00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:33,240 Speaker 1: have figured out a way to use it for good 346 00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:38,840 Speaker 1: because I'm always slightly aware of how I'm coming across, 347 00:19:38,920 --> 00:19:42,840 Speaker 1: because when I was a kid, I couldn't always come across. 348 00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:47,399 Speaker 1: I couldn't always express what I was feeling and trying 349 00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:51,280 Speaker 1: to express unless I took somebody else's words or facial 350 00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:55,880 Speaker 1: expressions to convey it, and then people would understand it better. Oh, 351 00:19:55,920 --> 00:20:00,760 Speaker 1: that's really interesting, And so I think that I found 352 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:05,520 Speaker 1: the magic of infusing what I was feeling with what 353 00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:11,920 Speaker 1: other people could comprehend could read. Right. Well, that's so interesting. 354 00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:15,840 Speaker 1: You have ADHD, Is that correct? Yeah? I also have that. 355 00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:18,840 Speaker 1: So I'm always a big fan. And you said you're 356 00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:20,800 Speaker 1: a divergent, but it's anything else fall for you into 357 00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:28,280 Speaker 1: that bucket. Well, see, here's the thing. Apparently my parents 358 00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:31,000 Speaker 1: recently told me that back in the day, back when 359 00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,360 Speaker 1: I was getting diagnosed with everything I was getting diagnosed 360 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,760 Speaker 1: with when I was a kid assigned female at birth 361 00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:41,720 Speaker 1: didn't get diagnosed autism spectrum quite as much. And purportedly 362 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:45,320 Speaker 1: my mother was told when giving me the diagnosis, you 363 00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:50,840 Speaker 1: have to choose between autism spectrum or ADHD. Your child 364 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:54,680 Speaker 1: falls squarely into both categories. Oh, it cannot be both, 365 00:20:56,119 --> 00:20:59,119 Speaker 1: that's crazy. This comes with this set of challenges. This 366 00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:04,200 Speaker 1: diagnosis come extra challenges, right you Wow, choose one and 367 00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:08,520 Speaker 1: we didn't know anything at the time. I was like, yeah, seven, 368 00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:12,480 Speaker 1: there's something like this. This is way before everything. So 369 00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:14,240 Speaker 1: here I am on the other side. My mom is 370 00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:18,600 Speaker 1: doing more and more work in autism spectrum spaces and realizing, 371 00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:23,200 Speaker 1: oh my goodness, becks where do you lie? Where exactly 372 00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:25,800 Speaker 1: on the spectrum do you lie? And I'm like, I 373 00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:29,080 Speaker 1: I don't know. I've spent so long learning how to 374 00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:32,280 Speaker 1: do what I do and how I present to the world. 375 00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:35,000 Speaker 1: Now I don't know if anyone could diagnose me. Is 376 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,480 Speaker 1: anything other than a chaos Gramlin is fine in time? 377 00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:41,680 Speaker 1: A chaos Gramlin. I don't know if that's an actual diagnosis, 378 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:44,240 Speaker 1: is it not? In the DSM five, I'm waiting for 379 00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:46,280 Speaker 1: the six. Am I hearing a lot about the chaos 380 00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:49,160 Speaker 1: Grablin diagnosis out there or any treatments for it, but 381 00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:53,080 Speaker 1: it sounds fun. No treatments terminal? Well, I know of 382 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:55,679 Speaker 1: both chaos and gramlins. Is like, that's a recipe for 383 00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:58,720 Speaker 1: a good time, or at least a mixture of good 384 00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:00,800 Speaker 1: times and bad times, but probably not a lot in 385 00:22:00,840 --> 00:22:05,560 Speaker 1: between definitely an eclectic time. It's so interesting to hear about, 386 00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:08,080 Speaker 1: like how much that diagnosis matters. Now. When I was 387 00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:09,520 Speaker 1: a kid and I got diagnosed, they put me on 388 00:22:09,520 --> 00:22:12,760 Speaker 1: a ton of drugs, and I was immediately like fight, 389 00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:14,720 Speaker 1: we're talking about zombies. But I was like, oh zombie. 390 00:22:14,760 --> 00:22:16,959 Speaker 1: Like I was like a oh yeah. Like I suddenly 391 00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:19,399 Speaker 1: became so good at like being in school, you know, 392 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:22,120 Speaker 1: but like my personality was like zeroed out. I never 393 00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:25,040 Speaker 1: got there. No, you were never good in school. No. 394 00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:28,479 Speaker 1: I was on so many different drug cocktails. We finally 395 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:30,919 Speaker 1: we finally found one that worked for me for a 396 00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:32,880 Speaker 1: long time, but I had I was on so many 397 00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:35,560 Speaker 1: of the little drug cocktails, but they all made me 398 00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:40,080 Speaker 1: so emotionally unstable, yeah, that it wasn't worth me getting 399 00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:42,359 Speaker 1: my homework done on time, right, So we had to 400 00:22:42,359 --> 00:22:44,719 Speaker 1: find different ones. No, eventually we stopped. I mean eventually 401 00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:47,480 Speaker 1: we stopped because it was like so extreme and later 402 00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:49,159 Speaker 1: in life, I was like, oh, like this is speed, 403 00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:51,000 Speaker 1: Like okay, this is what being on speed is. Like 404 00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:53,720 Speaker 1: I understand now that's actually yeah, a lot of fun. 405 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:57,480 Speaker 1: I mean the generation before me, they self medicated with 406 00:22:57,520 --> 00:23:00,000 Speaker 1: cocaine to get their homework done. In college. Yeah. Right, 407 00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:02,840 Speaker 1: So it's interesting that the diagnosis, like what you're saying 408 00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:04,800 Speaker 1: about your parents had to make this choice or you 409 00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:06,840 Speaker 1: had to kind of you know, be one or the other, 410 00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:10,359 Speaker 1: but not both because like probably at that point you 411 00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:12,320 Speaker 1: were seven or something. That was back when they were 412 00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:16,080 Speaker 1: still using the out of date term of Asperger's, which 413 00:23:16,119 --> 00:23:19,480 Speaker 1: was coined by like a Nazi, So like it was 414 00:23:19,560 --> 00:23:23,119 Speaker 1: back in the day when we're still learning about autism 415 00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:28,119 Speaker 1: spectrum disorder, we're still making strides. This was way before that, right, No, 416 00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:30,560 Speaker 1: it's like just the fact that a doctor would have 417 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:32,439 Speaker 1: been like, well, choose one. It's like, you know, roll 418 00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,440 Speaker 1: the dice. It could be a little of this, a 419 00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:36,119 Speaker 1: little of that, but you got to pick a side. 420 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,760 Speaker 1: I mean, it's interesting to see how much I diagnosis 421 00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:42,560 Speaker 1: can just blow up your whole existence, like getting the 422 00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:46,240 Speaker 1: wrong the wrong medication, the wrong therapy, the wrong truth. 423 00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:50,440 Speaker 1: And for many I definitely do have ADHD, and I 424 00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:53,840 Speaker 1: feel like that doesn't preclude me from having autism spectrum. 425 00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:56,639 Speaker 1: And a lot of responses now is like, well, you 426 00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:59,879 Speaker 1: interact so well, you make eye contact, and I'm like, 427 00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:05,840 Speaker 1: those are not the only really, yeah, this is not 428 00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:10,760 Speaker 1: the only thing I mean, it's funny because like it 429 00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:13,040 Speaker 1: is a spectrum, like it is like not one or 430 00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:17,159 Speaker 1: the other, right name, Yeah, it's right there, it's right there. Okay, 431 00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:20,879 Speaker 1: so you're a kid, you have ADHD, you are on 432 00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:24,600 Speaker 1: the spectrum most likely. Okay, you're gay, right, but I 433 00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:29,520 Speaker 1: know when did you come out like definitely confused and 434 00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:36,760 Speaker 1: queer and like I was just a gender nonconforming kid. Yeah, 435 00:24:35,880 --> 00:24:40,919 Speaker 1: I didn't understand why I had to wear a different 436 00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:43,000 Speaker 1: bathing suit than all the boys on the street that 437 00:24:43,040 --> 00:24:46,080 Speaker 1: I grew up with. Well, it doesn't make a lot 438 00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:48,960 Speaker 1: of fucking sense. Actually, if you'd ask any kid our 439 00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:52,840 Speaker 1: daughter at that point, our bodies still looked the same. Yeah. Yeah, 440 00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:55,560 Speaker 1: it's from that point up, like it's a little insane actually, 441 00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:58,359 Speaker 1: Like especially like I've experienced this because I'm a dude, right, 442 00:24:58,400 --> 00:24:59,919 Speaker 1: so I went through life just being a dude and 443 00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:03,199 Speaker 1: not thinking too much about it. Having a daughter and 444 00:25:03,359 --> 00:25:06,120 Speaker 1: going like oh yeah, well of course, she's like, how 445 00:25:06,119 --> 00:25:09,080 Speaker 1: come I can't just why do the girls get these 446 00:25:09,119 --> 00:25:11,280 Speaker 1: weird suits and boys are just wearing shorts or whatever. 447 00:25:11,880 --> 00:25:14,199 Speaker 1: Adults are the ones going like there's a difference, but 448 00:25:14,320 --> 00:25:17,480 Speaker 1: to them it doesn't fucking matter, And they would never 449 00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:21,280 Speaker 1: even think of it, you know, yeah, exactly. So okay, 450 00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:25,520 Speaker 1: so you're a kid, you're feeling use the word confused, right, Yeah, 451 00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:29,520 Speaker 1: I was just my reality was confusion for a lot 452 00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:32,400 Speaker 1: of things and a lot of reasons. I was confused 453 00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:36,000 Speaker 1: by what was happening inside my brain was happening outside 454 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:40,520 Speaker 1: my body. I was also gluten free, not until I 455 00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:46,199 Speaker 1: turned ten, and it was heavily affecting my neurology. My 456 00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:49,200 Speaker 1: entire body, like my eyesight started tripling for the worse 457 00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:51,919 Speaker 1: within like a month when I was in when I 458 00:25:51,960 --> 00:25:56,679 Speaker 1: was nine. Oh wow, my body was I would break things. 459 00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:59,520 Speaker 1: I would break my wrists just falling off a bed 460 00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:01,959 Speaker 1: or at the back of a couch. I broke my 461 00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,440 Speaker 1: foot walking and we couldn't figure out what was wrong 462 00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:09,800 Speaker 1: with my body. And also medicine wasn't really was only 463 00:26:09,840 --> 00:26:13,520 Speaker 1: doing half the trick. My brain was still like everything 464 00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:17,080 Speaker 1: felt foggy, everything felt awful, and I always felt angry 465 00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:20,840 Speaker 1: and confused. Yeah, and it wasn't until a couple of 466 00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:24,080 Speaker 1: months off gluten that I started to clear up. It 467 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:27,200 Speaker 1: had that big of an impact. Oh big time. Yeah, 468 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,320 Speaker 1: so you're you must have a pretty severe I mean, 469 00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:31,879 Speaker 1: it must be pretty severe your reaction to it, Like 470 00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:36,720 Speaker 1: I got gluten the other day and I've just been 471 00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:42,720 Speaker 1: fatigued and cranky and my body's cramping. It's just not fun. Jesus, 472 00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:46,159 Speaker 1: it sucked. That's crazy. That's crazy. So so okay, So 473 00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:48,400 Speaker 1: a ten you get diagnosed with that, At what point 474 00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:52,679 Speaker 1: do you actually say, all right, you know what, instead 475 00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,600 Speaker 1: of being confused or instead of kind of like pushing 476 00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:56,760 Speaker 1: against this or trying to work with like what other 477 00:26:56,760 --> 00:26:58,280 Speaker 1: people are telling you, what point are you like, Okay, 478 00:26:58,320 --> 00:26:59,920 Speaker 1: here's what I need to do? Like, was there a 479 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:03,000 Speaker 1: moment for you? I feel like there's a moment for everybody. 480 00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:05,399 Speaker 1: I mean, at least I remember a moment for myself 481 00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:07,760 Speaker 1: where I was like, okay, I have autonomy to sort 482 00:27:07,760 --> 00:27:09,679 Speaker 1: of like say what I want. Do you remember a 483 00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:13,800 Speaker 1: moment like that for you? I remember several times trying 484 00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:20,040 Speaker 1: and for various reasons being shot down. Really and so 485 00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:25,720 Speaker 1: it wasn't until I was in my twenties. Oh wow, really? Yeah? 486 00:27:26,080 --> 00:27:28,040 Speaker 1: You say shot down? How like shot down like by 487 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:31,200 Speaker 1: adults and stuff like shot down by friends, by adults 488 00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:35,639 Speaker 1: with the best intentions. I didn't really have, you know, 489 00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:42,199 Speaker 1: friends outside of family, friends and family until I was 490 00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:45,479 Speaker 1: in junior high, and that was also when I started 491 00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:50,880 Speaker 1: sort of vocalizing that I felt queer. Yeah, and very 492 00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:54,800 Speaker 1: well meaning people in my life, including lesbian guidance counselor, 493 00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:58,120 Speaker 1: told me not to risk my first friend group. Huh 494 00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:01,760 Speaker 1: by coming out seem like a good guidance. Yeah. That 495 00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:06,000 Speaker 1: generation all they knew was pain, right, that generation of queer, 496 00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:08,199 Speaker 1: that generation of gay, all they knew was pain and 497 00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:15,480 Speaker 1: heartbreak and rejection. So I understand why her life experience 498 00:28:15,920 --> 00:28:19,879 Speaker 1: made her say that. Yeah, and it still fucked me up. Yeah. No, 499 00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:22,200 Speaker 1: I mean you're like, hey, I feel like I need 500 00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:26,639 Speaker 1: to be this person, especially having a queer adult telling 501 00:28:26,680 --> 00:28:31,240 Speaker 1: you your queerness is going to make people reject you. Right, Yeah, 502 00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:34,120 Speaker 1: that's um. I get what you're saying about like sort 503 00:28:34,119 --> 00:28:37,240 Speaker 1: of best intentions or the where they were coming from, 504 00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:42,720 Speaker 1: but the effect is still the same. Yeah they still Yeah, 505 00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:45,480 Speaker 1: that's that's heavy. I mean that's really heavy. Like I 506 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:47,760 Speaker 1: look at social media and I look at the TikTok, 507 00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:50,280 Speaker 1: which is like excus so young, and it's like, I 508 00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:53,600 Speaker 1: want to believe that things are really different now, you 509 00:28:53,680 --> 00:28:57,360 Speaker 1: know that, Like that advice wouldn't be given. I mean, 510 00:28:57,360 --> 00:29:00,680 Speaker 1: obviously not every place is like this, right, not every 511 00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:03,400 Speaker 1: I mean for the South is probably a good example 512 00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:05,320 Speaker 1: of places where you're not gonna get Maybe you're gonna 513 00:29:05,320 --> 00:29:08,080 Speaker 1: get great advice if you're queer and you wanted to 514 00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:10,520 Speaker 1: like figure out what you do right, like how you 515 00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:12,920 Speaker 1: kind of become who you need to be. And there 516 00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:15,520 Speaker 1: was also that of like the awareness that I lived 517 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:20,280 Speaker 1: in the South, regardless of how accepting my immediate circle was, 518 00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:24,840 Speaker 1: I had a unique awareness. Then then I was in danger. Yeah, 519 00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:28,120 Speaker 1: Like I traveled outside of the perimeter for softball games, 520 00:29:28,320 --> 00:29:31,000 Speaker 1: and there was one softball game where one girl got 521 00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:33,880 Speaker 1: suspended from the game for threatening to hit me in 522 00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:36,880 Speaker 1: the head with a bat. I was the catcher. Yikes, 523 00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:39,920 Speaker 1: made a joke swinging at my head, and the umpire 524 00:29:39,960 --> 00:29:43,640 Speaker 1: immediately called time. Was like, this is you can't do that. God. 525 00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:45,720 Speaker 1: And I'll never know if it was because I was 526 00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:48,920 Speaker 1: gay or like collockably queer looking, or if it's because 527 00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:52,960 Speaker 1: I was like identifiably Jewish, or she just had a problem, 528 00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:55,920 Speaker 1: like a competitive problem, right, or if I was like 529 00:29:56,480 --> 00:29:59,400 Speaker 1: a specific target. I'll never know, and I don't really 530 00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:01,360 Speaker 1: want to It could have been all of those things. 531 00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:05,040 Speaker 1: You can't rule out that it was a combination, but 532 00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:09,560 Speaker 1: I can't I can't separate the fact that that that 533 00:30:09,760 --> 00:30:15,680 Speaker 1: same game started with them praying for God to grant 534 00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:20,560 Speaker 1: them the ability to accept defeat and not get angry 535 00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:25,160 Speaker 1: if they don't win. And I got uncomfortable at that immediately. 536 00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:27,840 Speaker 1: I'm like, if if, if you have to ask a 537 00:30:27,920 --> 00:30:32,280 Speaker 1: higher power to keep you from beating up someone else, 538 00:30:33,160 --> 00:30:36,840 Speaker 1: you're not a good person. Yeah, that's crazy. No, that's 539 00:30:36,880 --> 00:30:40,000 Speaker 1: so interesting. I mean to think about, like, God, I 540 00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:43,160 Speaker 1: hope I can handle being defeated at a sporting event 541 00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:46,320 Speaker 1: or whatever. God, I hope you let me handle losing 542 00:30:46,320 --> 00:30:48,520 Speaker 1: at a sporting event. Yea, not even God, I hope 543 00:30:48,560 --> 00:30:50,520 Speaker 1: I can handle it. God, I hope you allow me 544 00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:52,760 Speaker 1: to handle it like full on hands off of their 545 00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:55,360 Speaker 1: own responsibility. No, this is it's so funny because we 546 00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,840 Speaker 1: were talking about like the Jewish sort of and I'm 547 00:30:57,840 --> 00:31:00,880 Speaker 1: not comparing religions, but there is like that feeling of 548 00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:04,440 Speaker 1: when I was raised that like it was all on me, 549 00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:06,520 Speaker 1: Like it always felt like it was on me to 550 00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:08,680 Speaker 1: deal with my shit, and that there was not no 551 00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:10,480 Speaker 1: one was going to help. And if I asked anybody, 552 00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:12,880 Speaker 1: like I'm like, well, well, God intervene people are like, now, 553 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:15,400 Speaker 1: God doesn't do that. That's not our thing. We have 554 00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:17,960 Speaker 1: this whole holiday where it's like you weigh your sins 555 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,080 Speaker 1: and your mistakes and your successes for the year. Yeah, 556 00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:24,760 Speaker 1: it's you weigh that and you rectify it, not God. Yeah, 557 00:31:24,920 --> 00:31:27,280 Speaker 1: it's like kind of crazy to think about wild to 558 00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:30,080 Speaker 1: think about somebody putting any of that responsibility on somebody else. 559 00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:32,880 Speaker 1: But maybe that's maybe that's why it's so easy to 560 00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:36,360 Speaker 1: be cruel, right, Like if it's someone else is judging, 561 00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:38,440 Speaker 1: or there's some responsibility that you can pass off to 562 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:43,200 Speaker 1: somebody else, then like being shitty to other people becomes like, 563 00:31:43,280 --> 00:31:45,320 Speaker 1: you know, it's easy to be callous because you are 564 00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:47,600 Speaker 1: kind of like, well, you know, it's not in my hands. 565 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:52,120 Speaker 1: There's something so comforting about blanket forgiveness, right, No, I 566 00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:55,400 Speaker 1: mean the idea that you can be like I'm terrible, 567 00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:59,560 Speaker 1: but God forgives, Like you know what, I'm saved. God 568 00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:01,800 Speaker 1: is like, well, I I murdered a few people, but 569 00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:05,840 Speaker 1: I did repent, So see, I killed someone, but this 570 00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 1: dude died several centuries ago, so I'm chill with it. Yeah, 571 00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:14,440 Speaker 1: Like honestly, I get it. Like here, say it out loud, 572 00:32:14,480 --> 00:32:16,760 Speaker 1: I'm kind of like, oh, yeah, that's a good deal, 573 00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:20,800 Speaker 1: Like let me be a part of a thing really 574 00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:23,920 Speaker 1: really fucked up. But I am going to talk to 575 00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:26,120 Speaker 1: God about this, and I'm gonna get straight with my Lord, 576 00:32:26,200 --> 00:32:28,680 Speaker 1: and it's gonna be all good. Okay. So look, so 577 00:32:28,760 --> 00:32:30,720 Speaker 1: actually this brings me to something I want to talk about, 578 00:32:30,760 --> 00:32:33,360 Speaker 1: which is, like, you know, we are living in some 579 00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:37,200 Speaker 1: dark fucking times, right, Like yeah, especially if you're queer, 580 00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:40,800 Speaker 1: especially if you're a neuro DII virgin. An entire political 581 00:32:40,880 --> 00:32:46,880 Speaker 1: party here it seems geared towards truly like violent policy, right, 582 00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:49,959 Speaker 1: And I would imagine like you feel that probably more 583 00:32:49,960 --> 00:32:53,000 Speaker 1: acutely than I do, because again, like I walk out 584 00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:55,240 Speaker 1: the door and I'm just like a white dude strolling 585 00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:58,840 Speaker 1: down the street, but admittedly visibly Jewish. So you know, 586 00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:00,840 Speaker 1: it's on a full break for me. But you know, 587 00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:05,320 Speaker 1: like se off the hook, where do you find joy? 588 00:33:05,440 --> 00:33:08,040 Speaker 1: Where do you find some sanity away from all that? 589 00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:11,000 Speaker 1: Like it just seems like a dark time. I'm curious. 590 00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:14,240 Speaker 1: It's a very dark time, and it's a very important question. 591 00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:20,080 Speaker 1: Like I have my Sunday kickball in the park with 592 00:33:20,920 --> 00:33:25,479 Speaker 1: just a whole bunch of queer people having fun. That 593 00:33:25,600 --> 00:33:29,920 Speaker 1: helps a lot. I am creating things with queer people 594 00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:34,240 Speaker 1: whom I love and respect, and that brings joy there. 595 00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:40,880 Speaker 1: I'm doing a Bengo for Alzheimer's tonight at Hamburger Mary's, 596 00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:45,720 Speaker 1: and I'm scared. Yeah, I'm scared that some lunatic could 597 00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:49,880 Speaker 1: be deciding tonight's the night to shoot up right the 598 00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:53,360 Speaker 1: place with all the all the people who are full 599 00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:58,440 Speaker 1: of love and light. And it's scary, and I'm doing 600 00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:04,680 Speaker 1: it anyway because it feels important, because it feels like 601 00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:20,560 Speaker 1: something worth putting my safety at risk. Or you mentioned kickball, 602 00:34:20,719 --> 00:34:24,160 Speaker 1: and you talked about softball before sports obviously, but games 603 00:34:24,160 --> 00:34:26,160 Speaker 1: in general. You mentioned a bunch of times here, like 604 00:34:26,640 --> 00:34:31,520 Speaker 1: are you a gamer? Video games? Tabletop role playing games? Oh? Yeah, 605 00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:36,680 Speaker 1: you're into role playing games very much, yes, tabletop tabletop? 606 00:34:37,239 --> 00:34:40,480 Speaker 1: Oh okay, what is your game? What are your games? 607 00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:45,400 Speaker 1: You know, I'm one of those. I'm a basic bitch. 608 00:34:45,520 --> 00:34:48,640 Speaker 1: I'm super into Dungeons and Dragons right now. I know, 609 00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:52,040 Speaker 1: we've got like Pathfinder and Quest and there's this really 610 00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:54,879 Speaker 1: cool kickstarter I was part of for this game called 611 00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:59,280 Speaker 1: Hidden Niles, and like all these different platforms and everything, 612 00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:02,000 Speaker 1: but I I do find myself going back to five, 613 00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:07,480 Speaker 1: especially because I think it's a Volka's it's this new 614 00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:11,080 Speaker 1: addendum for five that's got witches and a mandrake race 615 00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:14,280 Speaker 1: that's sort of like an n and it matches perfectly 616 00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:16,719 Speaker 1: into this Fairytown campaign I've been doing with some of 617 00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:20,120 Speaker 1: my favorite people. So I'm like, I've sucked back in. 618 00:35:21,239 --> 00:35:24,320 Speaker 1: I love this. I actually I especially love it because 619 00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:28,680 Speaker 1: I just bought the starter set for me and my 620 00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:30,759 Speaker 1: daughter and we have these these friends who lived down 621 00:35:30,840 --> 00:35:33,439 Speaker 1: the street when I was a kid. I haven't played 622 00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:35,040 Speaker 1: in a long time, but when I was a kid, 623 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:37,359 Speaker 1: back in the old days when everything was in black 624 00:35:37,400 --> 00:35:40,000 Speaker 1: and white, I played a D and D, which there 625 00:35:40,040 --> 00:35:41,160 Speaker 1: used to be two. I mean, I don't know if 626 00:35:41,160 --> 00:35:42,600 Speaker 1: you know this, but there used to be two versions, 627 00:35:42,600 --> 00:35:44,640 Speaker 1: and I like, oh wow. I talked about this down 628 00:35:44,640 --> 00:35:45,920 Speaker 1: people are like, oh yeah, they did away with that. 629 00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:47,520 Speaker 1: But there was D and D, which was like, okay, 630 00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:49,719 Speaker 1: that's for like lightweights. And then there was a D 631 00:35:49,760 --> 00:35:53,040 Speaker 1: and D Advanced Dungeons and Dragons, which apparently they now 632 00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:55,080 Speaker 1: took all of the advanced Dungeons and Dragons, and that's 633 00:35:55,080 --> 00:35:58,279 Speaker 1: like what became like the regular Dungeons and Dragons at 634 00:35:58,360 --> 00:36:00,959 Speaker 1: least that's my understanding. Yeah, but I bought the starter 635 00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:03,680 Speaker 1: kid for me and Zelda and our friend Frank and 636 00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:05,919 Speaker 1: his son Alistair, and I was like, we got to play, 637 00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:09,080 Speaker 1: and I'm so excited to get started. I wish why 638 00:36:09,080 --> 00:36:11,719 Speaker 1: didn't I talk about D and D earlier, because like, 639 00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:15,439 Speaker 1: it's so it's so interesting to like here, okay, bring 640 00:36:15,560 --> 00:36:20,160 Speaker 1: bade no, no, for sure, I mean actually yeah, I 641 00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:22,000 Speaker 1: mean that would be great because I need it, like 642 00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:24,759 Speaker 1: once I re learn how to play, like, I feel 643 00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:27,239 Speaker 1: like it's such a great escape. And so that's what's 644 00:36:27,239 --> 00:36:28,800 Speaker 1: so interesting. Like you were talking about these kind of 645 00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:31,799 Speaker 1: like joyful things that you're doing, and I love that 646 00:36:31,840 --> 00:36:35,919 Speaker 1: you went to games as a place because I think, 647 00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:38,879 Speaker 1: you know, because look, sports, at their very core, it's 648 00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:40,839 Speaker 1: a game, right, and then when they're they're their best, 649 00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:44,080 Speaker 1: it's like you're playing literally. I know, it's like, Okay, 650 00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:46,600 Speaker 1: it's for money or it's to win or whatever, but 651 00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:49,879 Speaker 1: the people who do it best are doing it because 652 00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:52,280 Speaker 1: they love to do it, and it is like you're 653 00:36:52,320 --> 00:36:55,400 Speaker 1: you are playing a game, and that's like I think 654 00:36:55,440 --> 00:36:58,640 Speaker 1: that's such an interesting place to go because actually, during 655 00:36:58,680 --> 00:37:01,720 Speaker 1: the pandemic and a lot of times when I'm reading 656 00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:06,320 Speaker 1: the news and I get completely depressed and feel like hopeless. 657 00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:10,640 Speaker 1: My retreat is into game universe is usually video games. 658 00:37:11,200 --> 00:37:12,919 Speaker 1: One of my things has been if I can find 659 00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:14,719 Speaker 1: a world that's worse than the one that we're in 660 00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:17,960 Speaker 1: right now, that's always like like the last of us. 661 00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:21,520 Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, this is uh. I respect that I 662 00:37:21,520 --> 00:37:23,719 Speaker 1: have a friend who's very much the same. We had 663 00:37:23,760 --> 00:37:25,919 Speaker 1: a we had a campaign that we were doing during 664 00:37:25,960 --> 00:37:28,080 Speaker 1: the pandemic, and it was very much the same for 665 00:37:28,200 --> 00:37:30,440 Speaker 1: all of our players. They were looking for a world 666 00:37:30,440 --> 00:37:32,359 Speaker 1: that was worse than the one we were currently living in, 667 00:37:32,640 --> 00:37:35,280 Speaker 1: and I was just in the opposite boat. I needed 668 00:37:35,320 --> 00:37:40,560 Speaker 1: something better, right, something that is uplifted, not like yeah, listen, 669 00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:43,400 Speaker 1: I could talk about gaming forever. Yeah. It's the opposite 670 00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:45,720 Speaker 1: of like the social media thing, right, Like social media 671 00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:48,120 Speaker 1: is like you're getting like in most cases or reading 672 00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:51,200 Speaker 1: the news, it's like you're getting full reality. And gaming 673 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:54,440 Speaker 1: is like in terms of game, tabletop or collaborative story, 674 00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:57,359 Speaker 1: like you're going away from reality into something else. I mean, 675 00:37:57,520 --> 00:37:59,879 Speaker 1: he is acting like that for you, Like you build 676 00:37:59,880 --> 00:38:01,640 Speaker 1: a character in D and D. Are you building a 677 00:38:01,719 --> 00:38:03,920 Speaker 1: character like that? When you're when you're in something, when 678 00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:06,160 Speaker 1: you're when you're taking on a roll. Yeah. And the 679 00:38:06,200 --> 00:38:08,879 Speaker 1: best part of both D and D and acting is 680 00:38:08,920 --> 00:38:13,680 Speaker 1: that it's just reacting truthfully to imaginary circumstance, right, And 681 00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:17,200 Speaker 1: in D and D more so than anything, it's it's 682 00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:21,080 Speaker 1: imaginary circumstance, but it's it's really good practice and reminder 683 00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:24,920 Speaker 1: for acting that it's just that, right, it's just how 684 00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:28,120 Speaker 1: is this character that I've built and that I understand, 685 00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:32,680 Speaker 1: how is this character reacting to this wacky situation that 686 00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:35,279 Speaker 1: we find ourselves in? Right? What is your character like 687 00:38:35,320 --> 00:38:37,720 Speaker 1: in DND Not to go back to it, but I'm curious, 688 00:38:37,719 --> 00:38:39,040 Speaker 1: can you tell me a little bit about it? So 689 00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:43,440 Speaker 1: the character I am most obsessed with right now is um. 690 00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:47,360 Speaker 1: There's actually a race for him now that exists. In 691 00:38:47,400 --> 00:38:50,680 Speaker 1: the newest addendum, we sort of just built our own 692 00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:54,920 Speaker 1: version of an end from Lord of the Rings, but 693 00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:59,440 Speaker 1: with extra lore, where it's like in our universe, trees 694 00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:03,520 Speaker 1: from ages fifteen to two hundred go on what we 695 00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:06,080 Speaker 1: call a walk about where they figure out where they 696 00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:07,680 Speaker 1: want to put down their roots, and then after they 697 00:39:07,719 --> 00:39:11,319 Speaker 1: turn two hundred, they start their grove, and then they 698 00:39:11,360 --> 00:39:13,040 Speaker 1: have their roots for the rest of reality? Is this 699 00:39:13,160 --> 00:39:17,800 Speaker 1: your lore? This is our Yeah, we made this lure up. Yeah. Wow, 700 00:39:18,560 --> 00:39:22,359 Speaker 1: that's actually okay, you're going that deep. Oh yeah, we're 701 00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:25,000 Speaker 1: going super deep with it. We're building a whole world here. 702 00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:30,400 Speaker 1: And so Volka's addendum has a race called Mandrake. So 703 00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:33,919 Speaker 1: we're just combining our created race and all our lore 704 00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:36,640 Speaker 1: from that into the Mandrake. Wow, and using those stats 705 00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:40,319 Speaker 1: and things. It's really a tree. The tree is a 706 00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:45,840 Speaker 1: tree named alder. Wow. I mean that's kind of beautiful. 707 00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:47,799 Speaker 1: I mean it's kind of amazing. Are you playing with 708 00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:50,000 Speaker 1: other actors? Are you playing? Tell me about like, who's 709 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:54,160 Speaker 1: in the party, this particular party. Let's see. I think 710 00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:58,720 Speaker 1: all of us are some sort of creative except for 711 00:39:59,520 --> 00:40:03,640 Speaker 1: one of us is like a researcher at a media company. 712 00:40:04,760 --> 00:40:09,279 Speaker 1: We're all in various states of the industry. I mean, 713 00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:11,560 Speaker 1: we all live here, so we're all in various right, 714 00:40:11,719 --> 00:40:13,440 Speaker 1: we're parts of the industry, but we do have to 715 00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:16,239 Speaker 1: be part of the entertainment industry. Yeah, but we get 716 00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:19,160 Speaker 1: together to not be part of the entertainment industry for 717 00:40:19,200 --> 00:40:23,359 Speaker 1: a night and to just kind of goof around in fairytown. Right, God, 718 00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:26,279 Speaker 1: that sounds amazing. I'm sorry, Like I'm so jealous right 719 00:40:26,320 --> 00:40:29,799 Speaker 1: now just thinking about having a regular any kind of 720 00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:34,080 Speaker 1: regular game going like that, because I mean, actually when 721 00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:36,920 Speaker 1: I when I'm playing video games, I'm doing is very solitary, 722 00:40:37,040 --> 00:40:39,560 Speaker 1: Like most of the time, I'm not a big like 723 00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:41,560 Speaker 1: I'm not a Fortnite person, Like, do you play games 724 00:40:41,560 --> 00:40:47,839 Speaker 1: like that? I play like Hades. Assassin's Creed is so good. 725 00:40:48,520 --> 00:40:52,440 Speaker 1: Hades is like the first roguelike that I actually stick 726 00:40:52,480 --> 00:40:56,399 Speaker 1: with and return to really so good. Yeah, I mean, 727 00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:58,600 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie. I was full on playing Hades 728 00:40:59,320 --> 00:41:00,960 Speaker 1: before I got on this. You were like, can we 729 00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:03,480 Speaker 1: push thirty minutes? And I was like, perfect, I got there. 730 00:41:04,239 --> 00:41:06,239 Speaker 1: I get crushed at Haities. I'm like, I mean, I 731 00:41:06,320 --> 00:41:08,600 Speaker 1: don't know where I am. I definitely have played it 732 00:41:08,920 --> 00:41:10,680 Speaker 1: multiple times, and I get to a point where I'm like, 733 00:41:11,040 --> 00:41:13,400 Speaker 1: I can't keep going. It's just like I'm getting first 734 00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:17,000 Speaker 1: Escape from the Realm was it Escape Attempt twenty nine? 735 00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:21,319 Speaker 1: Oh my god. I was like, I think I might 736 00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:23,360 Speaker 1: have found a game that I'm good at. I have 737 00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:26,600 Speaker 1: played hundreds of games and like over and over again, 738 00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:29,319 Speaker 1: just brutally just kind of torturing myself in a way 739 00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:32,160 Speaker 1: and yet I'm not a person who's ever historically gotten 740 00:41:32,160 --> 00:41:34,120 Speaker 1: good at video games, Like I don't consider myself a 741 00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:36,720 Speaker 1: good video gamer. Like I don't like I have friends 742 00:41:36,719 --> 00:41:39,759 Speaker 1: who are like I'm I can like, you know, kill 743 00:41:39,760 --> 00:41:42,320 Speaker 1: shot you from wherever. I'm like, okay, cool, Like getting 744 00:41:42,360 --> 00:41:45,160 Speaker 1: good at a game has never been appealing to me. Good, Yeah, 745 00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:48,680 Speaker 1: thank you. So I think of a healthy relationship, say, yeah, 746 00:41:48,719 --> 00:41:50,200 Speaker 1: I don't know. Maybe, and this is just like maybe 747 00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:54,400 Speaker 1: a philosophical thing about like being killed and then getting 748 00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:57,960 Speaker 1: better from it. Maybe there is a life lesson here. Yeah, 749 00:41:58,000 --> 00:41:59,719 Speaker 1: I guess it's kind of you know, what doesn't kill 750 00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:01,800 Speaker 1: you make you stronger? Though in these games you definitely 751 00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:06,279 Speaker 1: get killed pretty does kill you makes you stronger? Yeah? 752 00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:11,040 Speaker 1: Something like that? Is there for you? A role that 753 00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:14,880 Speaker 1: is a fantasy, either one that exists out there that 754 00:42:14,920 --> 00:42:17,480 Speaker 1: you want to play, that you'd love to play, or 755 00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:20,240 Speaker 1: is there something that you'd like to create. I'm just curious, 756 00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:22,200 Speaker 1: like because you seem so creative, Like I feel like 757 00:42:22,239 --> 00:42:24,560 Speaker 1: this conversation, the whole time we've been talking, I feel 758 00:42:24,560 --> 00:42:27,080 Speaker 1: like there's so many moments of you. There's like a 759 00:42:27,120 --> 00:42:29,520 Speaker 1: spark of like originality where you're just like like in 760 00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:32,000 Speaker 1: on things. I'm like, oh wow, okay, I didn't I 761 00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:33,920 Speaker 1: would never have thought of that or whatever. So is 762 00:42:33,960 --> 00:42:35,400 Speaker 1: there a role for you, like you really want to 763 00:42:35,400 --> 00:42:37,080 Speaker 1: play it because it exists out there, or one that 764 00:42:37,080 --> 00:42:39,680 Speaker 1: you would like to create for yourself. I know it's 765 00:42:39,719 --> 00:42:42,920 Speaker 1: been done a million times, but I want to do 766 00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:47,880 Speaker 1: Peter Pan. But you know where the twist is. Peter 767 00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:50,600 Speaker 1: Pan is the angel of death for children who are 768 00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:53,759 Speaker 1: gone before their time. Oh my god, oh my god. 769 00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:57,759 Speaker 1: First off, first off, hold on number one. You know, 770 00:42:57,800 --> 00:43:01,319 Speaker 1: would you be Peter? Are you playing Peter? Okay? Absolutely? 771 00:43:01,400 --> 00:43:04,800 Speaker 1: Okay for starters. For starters, I think super good casting 772 00:43:04,960 --> 00:43:06,919 Speaker 1: in my opinion. And this is like I'm not look, 773 00:43:06,960 --> 00:43:09,800 Speaker 1: I'm not a film producer or anything, but or TV producer, 774 00:43:09,880 --> 00:43:13,560 Speaker 1: but totally sick cast anybody pay. But also I know 775 00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:16,880 Speaker 1: Peter Pan well because Zelda did a musical version of 776 00:43:16,920 --> 00:43:19,520 Speaker 1: Peter Pan. I'm very intimately familiar with the story now 777 00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:22,600 Speaker 1: I've seen multiple version of it. She actually obsessively watches 778 00:43:22,600 --> 00:43:25,520 Speaker 1: like other people doing Peter Pan productions on YouTube, Like 779 00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:30,480 Speaker 1: that idea is both so disturbing but also so great. 780 00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:33,200 Speaker 1: And I don't know that that I don't know that 781 00:43:33,200 --> 00:43:34,960 Speaker 1: that's a thing. I don't know if that's a thing 782 00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:37,319 Speaker 1: or not, but it definitely like because Peter Pan's whole 783 00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:41,120 Speaker 1: deal is like pretty fucking weird. Like there's a lot 784 00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:44,880 Speaker 1: of like unusual stuff happening with Peter Pan. That doesn't 785 00:43:44,960 --> 00:43:49,800 Speaker 1: you're not totally like okay, this is normal. It's highly suspicious. 786 00:43:49,840 --> 00:43:52,040 Speaker 1: So where does Tinkerbell fit into this? Like is Tinkerbell 787 00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:56,480 Speaker 1: like the the cleaner or like, I mean, why why 788 00:43:56,520 --> 00:43:59,320 Speaker 1: is Peter Pan killing the children? Do we know Peter 789 00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:02,839 Speaker 1: Pan's not killing the children? Peter Pan's harvesting the children. Oh, harvesting. 790 00:44:03,080 --> 00:44:06,719 Speaker 1: I hate to say harvesting, but yeah, Pan is is 791 00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:09,520 Speaker 1: you know, like the angel of Death taking the children 792 00:44:09,520 --> 00:44:11,879 Speaker 1: who die before their time. Oh I see, I could 793 00:44:11,920 --> 00:44:14,520 Speaker 1: be something as dark as like the Darling's killing their 794 00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:16,719 Speaker 1: children or something as simple as like a ghast like 795 00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:19,080 Speaker 1: killing the children. But like the kids want to go 796 00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:22,960 Speaker 1: home and the twist is that they cannot. So Neverland 797 00:44:23,120 --> 00:44:29,359 Speaker 1: is actually like uh wimbo or right right, right, wow, dude, 798 00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:31,520 Speaker 1: I think you need to make this. I don't know, 799 00:44:32,040 --> 00:44:35,320 Speaker 1: I don't know how, but I will. I just gotta 800 00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:38,399 Speaker 1: wait till it's public domain. So when is that? How 801 00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:40,560 Speaker 1: long is that. I don't know. It's so expensive, is 802 00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:42,719 Speaker 1: it not? Is it not public domain? I think it is. 803 00:44:42,719 --> 00:44:45,680 Speaker 1: It's got to be. Winnie the Pooh just hit public domain. 804 00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:48,359 Speaker 1: Wiz there, it has to be some There's so many 805 00:44:48,360 --> 00:44:51,279 Speaker 1: derivative works that are made from Peter Pan, Like there 806 00:44:51,280 --> 00:44:54,040 Speaker 1: are hook once Disney gets their hooks and no pen 807 00:44:54,120 --> 00:44:58,239 Speaker 1: intended once Disney gets their hooks and things. It's true. Oh, 808 00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:00,680 Speaker 1: they are making a new Peter Pan thing, aren't they. 809 00:45:01,160 --> 00:45:04,600 Speaker 1: There's any one coming out? Okay, wow, weird interesting time 810 00:45:04,640 --> 00:45:07,879 Speaker 1: stamping this episode so they can't steal it from us? Yeah, 811 00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:10,200 Speaker 1: here is this is actually like you can. This is 812 00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:13,440 Speaker 1: like trademark this, this is now out there in public. 813 00:45:13,520 --> 00:45:16,200 Speaker 1: You've put Disney call me you put a one in 814 00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:18,120 Speaker 1: the same. I think that's a amazing idea. But also 815 00:45:18,200 --> 00:45:19,920 Speaker 1: the idea of just doing it dark like that, just 816 00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:24,359 Speaker 1: doing it more like goth I think is really really good. 817 00:45:24,640 --> 00:45:26,719 Speaker 1: All Right, we have to wrap up. Unfortunately, God, this 818 00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:29,400 Speaker 1: has been such an interesting conversation and we went to 819 00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:32,560 Speaker 1: so many places I did not expect to go, which 820 00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:36,080 Speaker 1: I really like. Oh one more just because we're ending 821 00:45:36,080 --> 00:45:39,759 Speaker 1: on Peter Pan. Yeah, I'm gonna just throw it out 822 00:45:39,760 --> 00:45:43,359 Speaker 1: there a really great drag name for someone who has 823 00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:50,280 Speaker 1: bladder issues is Peter Pants. It took me a second, 824 00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:52,000 Speaker 1: like I was like, I don't get it, and then 825 00:45:52,040 --> 00:45:54,160 Speaker 1: like in the middle of going I don't get it, 826 00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:57,400 Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, that's fucking I mean, listen, 827 00:45:57,440 --> 00:46:00,160 Speaker 1: I think you've got something. Hey, maybe listen, have you 828 00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:05,359 Speaker 1: considered maybe that's the character. It's not Peter Pan's death. 829 00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:07,920 Speaker 1: You might be able to skirt the whole copyright issue 830 00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:11,399 Speaker 1: or whatever by being like, no, you don't understand. This 831 00:46:11,440 --> 00:46:14,240 Speaker 1: is not Peter Pan. This is Peter Pan. Peter Pants. 832 00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:18,560 Speaker 1: That's a whole different it's a whole different thing. You 833 00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:20,680 Speaker 1: have to come up with some fun names for Wendy 834 00:46:20,719 --> 00:46:22,799 Speaker 1: and the rest of the kids. That was thank you 835 00:46:22,840 --> 00:46:27,239 Speaker 1: for that. I needed that. No, that's Peter Pants. It's 836 00:46:27,360 --> 00:46:30,520 Speaker 1: very good. Okay, I think that's fantastic. Well, listen, you 837 00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:33,359 Speaker 1: gotta come back. We gotta let me. I'm gonna get 838 00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:35,279 Speaker 1: back into role to role playing. Then you gotta come back, 839 00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:36,800 Speaker 1: and we gotta get into like we have like a 840 00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:39,920 Speaker 1: whole RPG episode we should play. We should do an 841 00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:43,120 Speaker 1: episode where we just get a party together and play 842 00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:46,160 Speaker 1: so much fun. I would love that. Oh my gosh, yeah, 843 00:46:46,200 --> 00:46:48,160 Speaker 1: you got me fired up. Now I'm so fired up 844 00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:50,080 Speaker 1: to go and actually start playing again. I gotta get 845 00:46:50,200 --> 00:46:52,040 Speaker 1: out to convinced because she you know, at the moment 846 00:46:52,080 --> 00:46:53,719 Speaker 1: it's kind of hard to pull her away from like 847 00:46:54,160 --> 00:46:58,680 Speaker 1: musical theater and go. No, let's imagine a world of fantasy. 848 00:46:58,880 --> 00:47:02,080 Speaker 1: We could do a musical theater fantasy. Oh no, that's 849 00:47:02,120 --> 00:47:05,160 Speaker 1: that's the dream, isn't it? For her? That was really fun. Well, 850 00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:07,799 Speaker 1: she could play a bard easily. Her character could have 851 00:47:07,800 --> 00:47:10,080 Speaker 1: to sing everything. One of my favorite Bard spells is 852 00:47:10,160 --> 00:47:13,000 Speaker 1: vicious mockery. Will you just make an insult that hurts 853 00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:15,440 Speaker 1: so much it actually does physical damage? Oh my god. 854 00:47:15,920 --> 00:47:18,840 Speaker 1: And like a Bard's magic can be done through spells, 855 00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:24,240 Speaker 1: through music, through like poetry, through the ukulele, through singing, 856 00:47:24,400 --> 00:47:27,400 Speaker 1: so she could absolutely sing all her spells. You have 857 00:47:27,480 --> 00:47:31,239 Speaker 1: just given me a great convincing argument to actually get 858 00:47:31,280 --> 00:47:33,040 Speaker 1: the set out, because I do think she would love it. 859 00:47:33,200 --> 00:47:35,880 Speaker 1: But that's such a good way to get into it 860 00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:38,839 Speaker 1: because I could be gosh, you could play Oops All 861 00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:42,200 Speaker 1: Bards where it's just like a girl band, a girl 862 00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:48,760 Speaker 1: all Bards, Oops All Bards be very dramatic, very dramatic, campaign, 863 00:47:48,920 --> 00:47:52,799 Speaker 1: very dramatic party right there. Wow, I love this this show. 864 00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:55,520 Speaker 1: I've got so many good ideas now, this is amazing. 865 00:47:55,960 --> 00:47:59,560 Speaker 1: It's one of the blessings and the curses of ADHD. Truly, 866 00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:02,960 Speaker 1: I feel like I'm always having great ideas, but my 867 00:48:03,080 --> 00:48:08,879 Speaker 1: execution levels are like lacking. Yeah, very lacking. Yep. Bet 868 00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:11,799 Speaker 1: this has been so good and interesting, and I gotta 869 00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:15,320 Speaker 1: say this last part here where just guided into fucking 870 00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:18,880 Speaker 1: game conversation and crazy ideas, has been you know, I 871 00:48:19,040 --> 00:48:21,480 Speaker 1: see it on the cake and I really appreciate you 872 00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:24,000 Speaker 1: doing it, so thank you, my pleasure. Thank you so 873 00:48:24,080 --> 00:48:36,160 Speaker 1: much for having me. This was a blast. Well there 874 00:48:36,200 --> 00:48:38,400 Speaker 1: you have it. So obviously we have to follow up 875 00:48:38,400 --> 00:48:42,920 Speaker 1: with a full RPG, either episode or frankly into full campaign, 876 00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:46,040 Speaker 1: which will either be recorded or not. But I'm excited. 877 00:48:46,080 --> 00:48:48,640 Speaker 1: This has gotten me very excited about getting back into 878 00:48:48,719 --> 00:48:53,360 Speaker 1: role playing. I can finally develop a character for myself 879 00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:55,480 Speaker 1: that is everything that I hoped I would be as 880 00:48:55,520 --> 00:48:58,400 Speaker 1: a as an adult and ended up not being. So 881 00:48:58,440 --> 00:49:01,399 Speaker 1: that's really excited. I get to to feel what it's 882 00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:06,120 Speaker 1: like to be happy, and I'm looking forward to that 883 00:49:06,320 --> 00:49:10,879 Speaker 1: and fulfilled. Anyhow, that is our show for this week. 884 00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:14,360 Speaker 1: We'll be back next week with more what future, and 885 00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:17,400 Speaker 1: as always, I wish you and your family the very best.