Speaker 1: You're listening to Comedy Central.
Speaker 2: From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central's America's only
Speaker 2: source for news. This is the Daily Joke with your
Speaker 2: host Jazzy Lion.
Speaker 3: I'm eli, We've got so much to talk about tonight.
Speaker 3: Trump's plan for Gaza is still under construction. An old
Speaker 3: man gets into gardening, and Charlemagne the God kindly requests
Speaker 3: that Republicans stopping little bitches. Let's get into it with
Speaker 3: another installment of the Second Coming of Donald J.
Speaker 4: Trump, I'm gonna go.
Speaker 3: Yesterday, Donald Trump unveiled his big plan to relocate Gozins
Speaker 3: and turn their homeland into the world's holiest hard rock
Speaker 3: hotel and casino. And today the reviews are in. The
Speaker 3: Arab world hates it, Democrats condemn it, Republicans have problems
Speaker 3: with it, and the Palestinians won't abide by it.
Speaker 4: Or as Trump says, we.
Speaker 5: Asked for a lot of people are talking about everybody
Speaker 5: loves it.
Speaker 3: I stand corrected. I guess everybody loves it. And even
Speaker 3: though the plan was totally perfect in every way, his
Speaker 3: staff spent the entire next day walking back every single
Speaker 3: part of it.
Speaker 6: The President said his intention was to remove Palestinians from
Speaker 6: Gaza permanently, if we can.
Speaker 7: Get a beautiful area to resettle people permanently.
Speaker 6: But today the press secretary said it would be temporary.
Speaker 8: But the President has.
Speaker 3: Made it far that they need to be temporarily relocated
Speaker 3: out of Gaza for the rebuilding of this effort. All
Speaker 3: Trump's press secretary just had her first walk back. This
Speaker 3: is an important rite of passage for Trump's spokespeople.
Speaker 4: They're bull mitzvah if you will.
Speaker 3: She was spending so much time walking back the plan
Speaker 3: that at one point she ran out of English words.
Speaker 3: This is an unhabitable place for human beings.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so true.
Speaker 3: Remind me how it got unhabilibitable again, even worse for Caroline.
Speaker 3: While she was scrambling to salvage Trump's plan, Trump was
Speaker 3: on truth social readjusting it on the fly, which left
Speaker 3: everybody even more confused.
Speaker 9: Breaking Just a short time ago, President Trump seemed to backtrack,
Speaker 9: but also to double down on his plan to take
Speaker 9: over Gaza.
Speaker 3: A backtrack and a double down. And now on the
Speaker 3: uneven bars, will Trump will attempt the rare combination backtrack,
Speaker 3: double down and let's see if he breaks every bone
Speaker 3: in his body. But while his team tries to fix
Speaker 3: his Gaza plan, Donald Trump has already moved on because
Speaker 3: he's basically the neurovirus.
Speaker 4: Every day he.
Speaker 3: Spews executive orders all over the place, and while we
Speaker 3: struggle to clean up all the puke, he comes out
Speaker 3: the other end with something even worse.
Speaker 4: He tried to.
Speaker 3: Buy out the entire workforce of the CIA. His DOJ
Speaker 3: is going after anyone who's investigated him, and now he
Speaker 3: has defeated America's biggest threat.
Speaker 10: At the White House today, President Trump signing an executive
Speaker 10: order banning transgender women and girls from competing in women's sports.
Speaker 7: With this executive order, the war on women's sports is over.
Speaker 7: Who We are putting every school receiving taxpayer dollars on
Speaker 7: notice that if you let men take over women's sports
Speaker 7: teams or invade your locker rooms, you will be investigated
Speaker 7: for violation of Title nine and risk your federal funding.
Speaker 4: You don'tice how.
Speaker 3: He paused right before invade your locker rooms, like, maybe
Speaker 3: we won't make that illegal.
Speaker 4: Should have proof read this.
Speaker 3: It's bad enough that he's banned trans women from sports,
Speaker 3: but spare us the performance of pretending that this is
Speaker 3: a top issue for women in this country. Maybe start
Speaker 3: with I don't know reproductive rights or pay inequality, or
Speaker 3: why it's twenty twenty five and still none of my
Speaker 3: clothes have pockets. Now you might be wondering, is this
Speaker 3: really going to be the entire Trump presidency? Just divisive
Speaker 3: executive orders every day for the next four years. Probably,
Speaker 3: But on the bright side, he did have one executive
Speaker 3: order today that felt relatively harmless.
Speaker 5: I have signed an executive order to resume the process
Speaker 5: of creating a new national park full of statues of
Speaker 5: the greatest Americans who ever lived. It would be called
Speaker 5: the National Garden of American Heroes. And I hope that
Speaker 5: Congress will fully fund this wonderfully unifying project at the
Speaker 5: first possible opportunity.
Speaker 3: Excuse me, sir, Americans already have a national Garden and
Speaker 3: it sells unlimited breadsticks. I never thought i'd say this,
Speaker 3: but Elon, I got some government waste for you right here.
Speaker 3: Does anyone have the phone number of the Department of
Speaker 3: Government Efficiency?
Speaker 4: Actually they're all twelve year olds.
Speaker 3: Does anyone have the roadblocks user names of the Department
Speaker 3: of Government Efficiency? But the question is, in these divided times,
Speaker 3: will Trump's garden of heroes help to unify Americans to
Speaker 3: debate this issue, Let's go live to Ronnie Chang and
Speaker 3: Josh Johnson. Ronnie, Ronnie, let's start with you. Do you
Speaker 3: see this garden as something that could actually raise moral
Speaker 3: around the country?
Speaker 11: Uh?
Speaker 12: No, this country is pretty fud.
Speaker 13: That being said, this is actually a good idea.
Speaker 12: I do like a garden of heroes.
Speaker 13: I mean, America is so divided, but if we can
Speaker 13: walk in a garden with statues of George Washington and
Speaker 13: Neil Armstrong and Paul Giomati, maybe it'll bring us together.
Speaker 4: Okay, and Josh, what's your take?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's great.
Speaker 14: Did you say Paul Giamatti, the ball guy from Billions
Speaker 14: is in your top three?
Speaker 13: He's also the ball guy in Sideways and Big Mama's
Speaker 13: also I saw I need a hot dog in Union Square,
Speaker 13: although that might have just been another bad guy.
Speaker 12: But either way, American hero.
Speaker 14: Giamatti's not statue status at best. He can be a
Speaker 14: plaque or a name on a bench.
Speaker 13: A bench the thing people fought and smoke crack on.
Speaker 12: I don't think so.
Speaker 13: Okay, Paul Giamatti gets a statue maybe two.
Speaker 14: We're not putting Paul gami next to Abraham Lincoln and
Speaker 14: John Adams.
Speaker 13: Paul Giamatdy won an Emmy playing John Adams. Okay, how
Speaker 13: many Emmys did John Adams wooing for being John Adams?
Speaker 12: Ronnie, what the fuck are you talking about?
Speaker 14: John Adams was a second president and he didn't have
Speaker 14: slaves early America.
Speaker 12: No slaves, second president? Pretty cool?
Speaker 13: Yeah, you know who else didn't have slaves? Paul the
Speaker 13: hardy with the body Jiamatty.
Speaker 14: I'm like, I'm really trying to be unified right now,
Speaker 14: but Ryan, I'm truly gonna kill you.
Speaker 13: Okay, Well, why don't you come over here unify my
Speaker 13: fish with your face?
Speaker 3: Okay, guys, guys, guys, guys. Fist fighting over Paul Giamati
Speaker 3: is not what the Garden of Heroes is all about.
Speaker 13: Oh, I'm sorry that I don't want to walk through
Speaker 13: a garden staring at Lincoln's penis.
Speaker 12: Ronnie, what Why would this penis be out?
Speaker 13: Because obviously the statues will be naked.
Speaker 12: Like they are in Europe. They all got little baby
Speaker 12: care of digs.
Speaker 13: Okay, it's called culture, bro, This is America, all right.
Speaker 14: Our statues have clothes wear funny ass hats and ride horses.
Speaker 13: Okay, I'll give you the hats and horses, but they're
Speaker 13: new do I walk.
Speaker 3: Excuse me, guys, Before we get into their outfits, I
Speaker 3: just want to point out that neither of you have
Speaker 3: mentioned any women heroes.
Speaker 13: Oh can we please not DEI the fucking garden.
Speaker 4: Imagine walking through the park and seeing.
Speaker 3: Eleanor Roosevelt Rosa Park, Susan b Anthony and other inspiring
Speaker 3: women who would look great as gnomes nomes. Well, it's
Speaker 3: a garden, obviously, all the heroes will be nomes. You'll
Speaker 3: be walking around and be.
Speaker 4: Like, oh, look it's Ruth Bader gins gnome.
Speaker 13: Okay, we are not making the statues into gnomes, and
Speaker 13: if we did, wouldn't it be Ruth Bader Nolmesburg.
Speaker 12: I hate you and I hate your half of the country.
Speaker 3: Guys, guys, this garden is tearing us apart. Please let's
Speaker 3: let's compromise. Okay, for the sake of all unity and
Speaker 3: all things dignified, we will get Ronnie a Paul Giamatti statue,
Speaker 3: thank you, and to please, Josh Giamatti will be wearing
Speaker 3: a John Adams hat. Thank you, Desi and he'll be
Speaker 3: naked on a horse next to a proud nomes Bader Ginsburg.
Speaker 13: Fine, fine, but she's nude and her boos have to
Speaker 13: look like Paul Giomotti.
Speaker 12: Yeah, I'm fine with.
Speaker 14: That, as long as she's surrounded by like a lovely
Speaker 14: little field of begonias.
Speaker 13: Begonias, your stupid burned this got into the ground.
Speaker 3: Okay, you know what, forget it, Forget the garden unification canceled.
Speaker 3: Ronnie Chang and Josh Johnson every year.
Speaker 4: May come back, Sarta Maine. We'll get us your opinion.
Speaker 1: Well, we all know.
Speaker 3: I've got great opinions, but I'm not the only ones.
Speaker 3: Studies show that other people also have opinions. So here
Speaker 3: with another installment of in my opinion, is our good
Speaker 3: friend Charlemagne the God.
Speaker 1: All right, all right, all right.
Speaker 10: For the last year, so people like me have been
Speaker 10: running around tearing our hair out, saying Donald Trump is
Speaker 10: going to destroy democracy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I told my hair out. What did you think
Speaker 1: happened to it?
Speaker 10: But three weeks in the Trump Part two, I don't
Speaker 10: think he's going to destroy democracy anymore. I think he's
Speaker 10: already done it. The oligarchy is already here. I haven't
Speaker 10: seen CEOs this happy since they called Luigi at that McDonald's. Yeah,
Speaker 10: and now Trump is handed over the keys to the
Speaker 10: whole government.
Speaker 1: The Elon Musk. Yeah, that's right, Elon Musk, world's.
Speaker 10: Richest manchild, the guy who innovated rockets and really innovated handwaving. Yea,
Speaker 10: and Musk is already doing so much to damage America
Speaker 10: that isis is getting fomo.
Speaker 15: Elon Musk has essentially been a bull in the government's
Speaker 15: china shop, closing programs, locking out employees from their offices,
Speaker 15: shutting down websites, locking up email accounts.
Speaker 6: Those has its pause in Usaid, the Treasury Department, NOAA,
Speaker 6: the centers for Medicare and Medicaid services, the Labor Department,
Speaker 6: even the Transportation Department.
Speaker 10: Yeah yeah, Elon is scripting the federal government like as
Speaker 10: Kanye's wife at the Grammys. If you think about it,
Speaker 10: Elon is the Kanye of the government.
Speaker 1: An ego maniac.
Speaker 10: Well, he's an egomaniac coasting off early success who is.
Speaker 1: Way more in the hilly than you would have thought.
Speaker 10: Okay, yeah, somehow Trump demanded we get rid of DEI,
Speaker 10: then gave the job of co President to an unqualified,
Speaker 10: unelected African immigrant. This country is a supposed to be
Speaker 10: run by incompetent foreigners. It's supposed to be run by
Speaker 10: incompetent Americans. I can't believe I'm saying this during Black
Speaker 10: History Month with Elon go back to Africa, yes, and
Speaker 10: take your little minions too.
Speaker 16: Longtime government employees this week were shocked to find that
Speaker 16: their new supervisors from Elon Musk's Doge department include recent
Speaker 16: college and high school graduates between nineteen and twenty four
Speaker 16: years old. One of the young men is apparently a
Speaker 16: former Internet Musk's neuralink company who goes by the online
Speaker 16: handle big Balls.
Speaker 10: Big Bass. This is how I know Elon is running
Speaker 10: with a crew of virgins. I never met anyone who's
Speaker 10: really in the balls. Okay, no one's like, send me
Speaker 10: a Stroede pick and get that dick out of the way,
Speaker 10: all right.
Speaker 1: I want to see what those balls do. I need
Speaker 1: a man hung like a beanbag chair.
Speaker 10: PAULS, How are you gonna put nineteen to twenty four
Speaker 10: year olds in the driver seat?
Speaker 1: All right? They're not even old enough to rent a car.
Speaker 10: Maybe it's just me, but I don't want the people
Speaker 10: destroying the government to only know Andre three is the
Speaker 10: flute guy. Yeah, so we are some dark times people.
Speaker 10: I just hope the Democrats are organizing an effective opposition
Speaker 10: to all this.
Speaker 1: Show them what you're made of, Dems. Hey there, Chris Murphy.
Speaker 11: It's been a very long, long day today, full of
Speaker 11: a lot of bullshit.
Speaker 1: So I poured myself drake it is.
Speaker 12: It's pink.
Speaker 8: It's pink stocking grape fruit juice.
Speaker 10: Yeah, you're you're You're unwinding with a pink drink in
Speaker 10: the middle of the game. Mother, Get some man fetamines
Speaker 10: and get back on the field. Okay, you got Come on, man,
Speaker 10: you got you got elon out here pumped up on
Speaker 10: Mars juice and ketamine and you're out here having.
Speaker 1: A sea breeze getting this fight. Dems. Your mascot is
Speaker 1: a donkey.
Speaker 10: Donkey punched these mothers gohol the rally or something.
Speaker 1: I am gonna stand with you in this fight, and.
Speaker 12: We will win.
Speaker 11: We will win.
Speaker 1: We will win. We will win.
Speaker 12: We will win.
Speaker 7: We we won't rest, we won't rest.
Speaker 10: Okay, see see now I need a pick drink, I
Speaker 10: need I need something to civil lord.
Speaker 1: I'm mercy.
Speaker 10: Yeah, this entire generation of them. Leadership has got to go. Man,
Speaker 10: all right, one of those guys had a pimp cane
Speaker 10: and he still didn't seem tough.
Speaker 1: You know how hard that is. He'd be the first
Speaker 1: pimp with his hole.
Speaker 10: Slap him all right, kick him out, vote him out,
Speaker 10: hide their life.
Speaker 1: Alert, make him walk down.
Speaker 10: Whatever stands, Mitch McConnell uses, I don't care. It just
Speaker 10: needs to change, all right. Please tell me there are
Speaker 10: some young Democrats who can speak clearly on this.
Speaker 12: What do we need? What do we need?
Speaker 1: Some subtitles for starters? All right?
Speaker 10: Did Joe Biden sneeze and give all of you dementia?
Speaker 1: You know what?
Speaker 10: Forget the Democrats and let me talk to Republican politicians
Speaker 10: for a second. I get you want to cut government
Speaker 10: spending down to the bone, but remember, Musk isn't just
Speaker 10: coming for poor kids that you don't care about.
Speaker 1: He's coming for your red states.
Speaker 10: He's coming from Medicare, Medicaid farm subsidies. There is no
Speaker 10: community in America.
Speaker 1: There's one impact.
Speaker 10: It's not a black thing, a white thing, a gay thing,
Speaker 10: a great thing, a spin on that thing thing. White conservatives,
Speaker 10: I expect more from you Okay, you're just going to
Speaker 10: roll over and let an African colonize you.
Speaker 1: Apparently they are on Capitol Hill. Republicans are planting Mussu's goals.
Speaker 1: Elon Musk is a genius.
Speaker 2: Elon Musk, he can do whatever he wants to go
Speaker 2: look at all of this stuff.
Speaker 1: Stop handwringing about what's going on.
Speaker 15: The Democrats need to get used to this, So get
Speaker 15: ready for disruption.
Speaker 4: Get used to disruption.
Speaker 15: To my friends who are upset, I would say, with respect,
Speaker 15: you know, call somebody who cares.
Speaker 1: You're supposed to care. Okay, even if you don't care,
Speaker 1: that's right.
Speaker 10: Even if you don't care about weed of people, don't
Speaker 10: you care about your own power? Congress is supposed to
Speaker 10: control spending, and Trump is letting us do it while
Speaker 10: you watch.
Speaker 1: Elon is constitutionally cucking you. All right. I need you
Speaker 1: to give much the same energy you give George Soros.
Speaker 10: You've been talking all that nonsense about evil billionaires with
Speaker 10: Jewish space lasers.
Speaker 1: Elon's got real space lazers. Okay. And Elon's poll numbers
Speaker 1: when Republicans are already.
Speaker 10: Crashing, but don't forget, they can't vote him out of office.
Speaker 1: But they can vote you out of office. Yeah that's right.
Speaker 10: You think Elon cares about blowing up your political future.
Speaker 10: This man blows up his own rockets for fun. So, Republicans,
Speaker 10: I know it's tough to stand up to Trump and
Speaker 10: Musk right now, but our democracy and your jobs depend
Speaker 10: on it. So if you don't want the mob turning
Speaker 10: on you, you need to act like a nineteen year
Speaker 10: old tech bro and grow some big balls.
Speaker 1: But doctor's my opinion.
Speaker 4: Weeknight, we'll be turning on the.
Speaker 3: Day I got Tonight is an Academy Award winning actor
Speaker 3: who stars in the new film Love Hurts.
Speaker 4: Please welcome Key week, What.
Speaker 11: Don't care?
Speaker 12: Wow?
Speaker 11: Wow, thank you. Before we start, I want to say, uh,
Speaker 11: I know Ronnie Chantey is in the building.
Speaker 16: Uh.
Speaker 11: I've been looking for him everywhere and I can't find him.
Speaker 11: So can you please do my favor. When you see him,
Speaker 11: remind him that he promised to buy out all the
Speaker 11: tickets in New York for my movie this weekend. Oh yeah, yeah, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 11: I'm just yoking.
Speaker 4: Because it's very generous that way.
Speaker 3: I think what happened is he bolted when he found
Speaker 3: out that you were coming here because he doesn't like
Speaker 3: being uh, he doesn't appreciate him not being the most
Speaker 3: handsome Asian man in the room.
Speaker 1: So he's got a little bit he got Brentons.
Speaker 11: Yeah, no, I know he's mad at me because we
Speaker 11: made a movie with Asians and he's not in it.
Speaker 4: Can you believe it? I can't even believe it.
Speaker 1: You do not follow me. Do not follow me.
Speaker 3: I have to tell you, my favorite thing about your
Speaker 3: movie is that Ronnie's not in it. It is no,
Speaker 3: this is such a fun movie.
Speaker 8: It is.
Speaker 4: It's a Valentine's Day action film.
Speaker 3: So would you describe it as like die Hard for
Speaker 3: hopeless romantics?
Speaker 11: Yeah, I mean it's you know, I always wanted my own,
Speaker 11: uh action movie, and over the years, you know, Valentine's
Speaker 11: Day is a very special day out of the year
Speaker 11: because I get to show my wife how much I
Speaker 11: love her and uh and it's always, you know, you
Speaker 11: always romantic comedies out there, So it's kind of cool
Speaker 11: that we get to have an.
Speaker 8: Action movie on Valentine's Day.
Speaker 3: It's so good, You're excellent in it, and it's so
Speaker 3: much fun. One thing that I love about you is
Speaker 3: that you just have the most joyful, positive and sectious energy.
Speaker 3: And one thing that I noticed was your character in
Speaker 3: the opening of this film is this happy guy and
Speaker 3: he's grateful for his life, and he keeps saying, I
Speaker 3: love this life. And then, as it turns out, he's
Speaker 3: secretly an assassin. So I'm wondering, are you secretly an assassin?
Speaker 8: Yes, yes, Guessie, I knew it. Be careful what you
Speaker 8: say here, No, no, no, no. I mean that's what
Speaker 8: I love.
Speaker 11: About about him is that you know that element of
Speaker 11: surprise over the years. You know, action heroes look a
Speaker 11: certain way, act a certain way. And that's why when
Speaker 11: I read the script Love Hurts. I initially turned it
Speaker 11: down because I just couldn't see myself in it. But
Speaker 11: once when I found out that, you know, they were
Speaker 11: trying to create a new kind of action hero, someone
Speaker 11: who doesn't look lethough until he's pushed to the limits,
Speaker 11: and then you realize, Wow, he is freaking badass.
Speaker 8: And I really love that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's very true you You are lethal in some
Speaker 3: of these action sequences, and you actually have a black
Speaker 3: belt in taekwondo.
Speaker 4: Is that true?
Speaker 8: Yeah? Yeah, I love yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 11: I stud h martial arts for a long time and
Speaker 11: got a black belt, and and that's why when we
Speaker 11: you know, when we were doing this movie, I one
Speaker 11: thing that I know for sure was I wanted to
Speaker 11: do all the fights myself. I wasn't gonna let my
Speaker 11: stunt double have all the fun. But it was so
Speaker 11: hard and so challenging. I got so many bruises, aches
Speaker 11: and pains. I feel like, you know, every night I
Speaker 11: would go soak myself, soak my body, uh in salt bath.
Speaker 11: I feel like I should get an endorsement from epsin salt.
Speaker 4: Do you hear that epsin?
Speaker 11: I used so many bags during during during the shooting
Speaker 11: of this movie, I.
Speaker 3: Can't even imagine. I mean, there was so much. Those
Speaker 3: scenes are so pressive. And you're in the movie with
Speaker 3: Ariana Debos, Ariana DeVos, Sean.
Speaker 8: Lynch, Daniel Will. We have an incredible cast.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 3: Did you tell him to go full beast mode or
Speaker 3: did you say, please don't go full beast mode on me,
Speaker 3: go maybe calm mode?
Speaker 8: Or actually it was quite the opposite.
Speaker 11: You know, I didn't know how fast he was until
Speaker 11: there was one shot where the camera is about.
Speaker 8: Twenty feet away. I get a headstart.
Speaker 11: I supposed to run towards camera and he catches up
Speaker 11: to me and puts his arm on my shoulder and
Speaker 11: pulls me back and I said, guys, you know he's
Speaker 11: not going to catch up to me.
Speaker 8: I'm going to get to the camera way before he does.
Speaker 8: And he was off to the side and he's just like, key,
Speaker 8: you just run for your life.
Speaker 1: And I'll.
Speaker 8: And sure enough, I mean, he's Peaks mode.
Speaker 11: And you know at the at the premiere after party,
Speaker 11: my my family, you know, got to hang out with him,
Speaker 11: the big fans. I don't know whether he knows it
Speaker 11: or not, but he has this like incredible ability, uh
Speaker 11: to get everybody. They say, yes, he was doing shots
Speaker 11: with them and got them all drunk.
Speaker 3: Their entire family got to go, oh my gosh, that
Speaker 3: was cool.
Speaker 4: That's a good Hollywood night. That's a very good no.
Speaker 11: I mean, anytime you get to hang out with Mahean Lynch,
Speaker 11: that's a good night.
Speaker 8: And I love him so much and he's so good
Speaker 8: in this movie. Was Arianna Daniel tyre cast. We had
Speaker 8: so much fun making.
Speaker 3: This and also Sean Aston your Goonies, my gooney brother
Speaker 3: brother had a great cameo in it. Yeah, very very
Speaker 3: cool cameo. I'm curious was it. What was it like
Speaker 3: to get to work with him again? And when the
Speaker 3: director yelled cut, did you say, no, this is our time,
Speaker 3: our time down here? That's great that in I'm sorry
Speaker 3: I had to get one.
Speaker 11: Yeah.
Speaker 15: No.
Speaker 11: When we were shooting that scene, another Gooney came to
Speaker 11: visit Jeff Cohen, my attorney, akh and.
Speaker 8: And you know, and the crew was like freaking out.
Speaker 15: You know.
Speaker 11: There was like, you know, three unis and we went
Speaker 11: a good time. And also to be able to share
Speaker 11: the screen with Sean again after so many years, Uh,
Speaker 11: it met so much to me.
Speaker 4: It's really special.
Speaker 11: And those two is that you see in the movie,
Speaker 11: they're real because all of a sudden I was a
Speaker 11: kid again. It you know, made me go back to
Speaker 11: to that incredible adventure that we all had.
Speaker 4: Oh you do that for the audience too.
Speaker 3: I heard that your next dream project would be to
Speaker 3: play an evil villain.
Speaker 4: Is this true?
Speaker 12: Yeah?
Speaker 8: I always want to play villain. I think it's so fun.
Speaker 8: I think it's so fun.
Speaker 4: Well, I think you'd make a great evil villain.
Speaker 8: I think so too.
Speaker 1: Yea.
Speaker 3: And in order to make that happen, we at the
Speaker 3: Daily Show wanted to be part of this. So I
Speaker 3: was wondering if you would consider reading a few villain
Speaker 3: lines into camera. We want to help you get this
Speaker 3: next tea.
Speaker 11: Yeah, okay, all the filmmakers out there tomorrow. This Actually
Speaker 11: I'm also I'm gonna do a a horror movie next
Speaker 11: but uh but this will give me a nice practice.
Speaker 3: Just a little practice, just for a rehearsal. If we could,
Speaker 3: could we get some villain lights.
Speaker 11: Oh, this is gonna I'm gonna take all my glasses.
Speaker 11: Here's this look makes me look affable, So let's sake.
Speaker 4: Here do you need? Do you need a villain?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Oh elitt okay, and right into the camera.
Speaker 3: We prepared these for you.
Speaker 11: Prepare to die, mister being. Okay, this one, this one,
Speaker 11: I oh, this one, I like a mission. If you
Speaker 11: ever want to see your family again, you'll hand me
Speaker 11: that artifact.
Speaker 8: Are we Oki Doki? Doctor Jones?
Speaker 4: Spooky?
Speaker 1: Oh? This is great?
Speaker 8: Okay, this one. Let me see, let me see how
Speaker 8: should I do this?
Speaker 6: Ah?
Speaker 8: All right, okay, turn to camera.
Speaker 4: Okay, it's a very very dead cat. You got, sorry
Speaker 4: about that.
Speaker 8: You you go to.
Speaker 11: Your closet and you select that lumpy blue sweater, for instance,
Speaker 11: because you're trying to tell the world how you take
Speaker 11: yourself too seriously to care to care about what you put.
Speaker 8: On your back.
Speaker 11: For what you don't know is that that sweater it's
Speaker 11: not blue, it's not turquoise, it's not lappings, it's actually.
Speaker 8: Ulian.
Speaker 3: That one you have the job the job that lack
Speaker 3: one was from Doubleware's Prada. Well, I cannot wait to
Speaker 3: see you play a villain. I also love seeing you
Speaker 3: and literally everything you do. So congratulations on everything.
Speaker 12: Thank you.
Speaker 4: So February on right now here, it is your moment
Speaker 4: and been.
Speaker 1: Some animals are making predictions, as they often do. For
Speaker 1: the Super Bowl.
Speaker 15: Willie at the Montana Zoo picked the Eagles to win.
Speaker 9: And now Strawberry the camel also picked the Eagles, a black.
Speaker 3: Vulture named Muerto and Vasa the parrot. Felma didn't floundered,
Speaker 3: picking Kansas City as a winner, and I predict that
Speaker 3: Kansas City paid her off.
Speaker 2: The Explore more shows from The Daily Show podcast universe
Speaker 2: by searching The Daily Show wherever you get your podcasts.
Speaker 1: Watch The Daily Show weeknights at eleven.
Speaker 2: Ten Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime
Speaker 2: on Paramount
Speaker 8: Plus Paramount podcasts,