1 00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:14,280 Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, it is me Rosie O'Donnell, and you have 2 00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:18,920 Speaker 1: found my podcast Onward with Rosy O'Donnell. That's the goal, folks. 3 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:19,400 Speaker 2: Onward. 4 00:00:19,480 --> 00:00:21,600 Speaker 1: I was in New York for the fourth of July, 5 00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:26,239 Speaker 1: and people in public in the airports mostly were so 6 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:29,960 Speaker 1: kind and so nice, so loving, and so many talking 7 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:32,760 Speaker 1: about this podcast. You know, it's funny you do a 8 00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:35,599 Speaker 1: podcast in your own house with your headphones on and 9 00:00:35,960 --> 00:00:40,080 Speaker 1: talking to somebody, usually on the computer, and you don't 10 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,960 Speaker 1: really think it's going out there to millions of people. 11 00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:45,960 Speaker 1: You know, you don't because you do it just a 12 00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:48,640 Speaker 1: tiny little thing in your house. And you know, people 13 00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:51,400 Speaker 1: were talking to me about the Reality Winter episode and 14 00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:54,080 Speaker 1: how much they loved that, and I was so glad 15 00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:55,840 Speaker 1: that we got to have her on and that people 16 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:59,000 Speaker 1: can get used to her story, her name and what 17 00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:03,200 Speaker 1: an amazing American patriot she is and all the comments 18 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:06,559 Speaker 1: about that episode were very moving and thank you so much. 19 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:10,279 Speaker 1: And speaking of comments, we have the leave a voice 20 00:01:10,319 --> 00:01:15,080 Speaker 1: memo and people have been leaving them with questions and comments, 21 00:01:15,319 --> 00:01:19,920 Speaker 1: and I gotta tell you, they're so lovely. What you 22 00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:22,280 Speaker 1: guys are doing, what you're sending me all the love 23 00:01:22,319 --> 00:01:26,200 Speaker 1: that you're giving back to me is overwhelming. It is, 24 00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:31,240 Speaker 1: and I don't know, I kind of like being sixty one. 25 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,600 Speaker 1: I kind of like growing older. I kind of like 26 00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:40,080 Speaker 1: having so many years to look back on my life, 27 00:01:40,240 --> 00:01:44,320 Speaker 1: my career, my family. People stop me and ask me questions, 28 00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:47,240 Speaker 1: how are my kids? How's this one? How's that one? 29 00:01:47,319 --> 00:01:50,720 Speaker 1: And it's really a beautiful thing. And I just wanted 30 00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:53,000 Speaker 1: to do a shout out to all of the Delta 31 00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:58,960 Speaker 1: Airlines flight attendants. You guys are the best. Seriously. I 32 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,440 Speaker 1: took a red eyein and then I took the first 33 00:02:01,480 --> 00:02:05,280 Speaker 1: flight out, which was like a reverse red eye, So 34 00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:08,040 Speaker 1: I went for like three days or something because that 35 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:12,040 Speaker 1: first flight everyone sleeps, you know, everyone sleeps, including me. 36 00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:15,120 Speaker 1: And when I woke up, this wonderful flight attendant his 37 00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:17,680 Speaker 1: name was Jay, I believe, said I saved you an 38 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:21,119 Speaker 1: expeded it. I was like, are you the sweetest guy 39 00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:23,720 Speaker 1: in the world. So a shout out to all those 40 00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:28,960 Speaker 1: people and just everybody in general. The positivity is very 41 00:02:29,040 --> 00:02:33,080 Speaker 1: uplifting and helps me in so many ways. And you know, 42 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 1: like so many of us, I struggle with depression and 43 00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:37,560 Speaker 1: I'm medicated and I'm on top of it and taking 44 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:39,720 Speaker 1: care of my mental health. But I will say this 45 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:43,320 Speaker 1: injection of love gives me some serotonin and dopamine and 46 00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:46,880 Speaker 1: all those things my brain sometimes lacks. So thank you 47 00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 1: so much for the beauty and your stories and your comments, 48 00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:55,760 Speaker 1: and I really really appreciate that I'm having a good 49 00:02:55,840 --> 00:02:59,600 Speaker 1: summer so far. My kid is so excited that the 50 00:02:59,639 --> 00:03:02,720 Speaker 1: pool there with a slide, although she does not allow 51 00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 1: me to really take her going down this. I have 52 00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:06,920 Speaker 1: to like be like a Papa Razzi to get a 53 00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:10,200 Speaker 1: picture of her now. She just says no. I don't 54 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:11,920 Speaker 1: know if she's gonna still do the videos with me 55 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:15,440 Speaker 1: and attack me on TikTok, but we'll see, because she's 56 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:18,360 Speaker 1: going to be eleven in January, and it feels like 57 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:22,000 Speaker 1: those preteen years are crunching up on me. We have 58 00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:25,240 Speaker 1: a great show today, we really do. It is Belinda 59 00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:27,919 Speaker 1: Carlisle from the Go Gos. You know where you love her. 60 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:31,400 Speaker 1: Here's the thing. I didn't really know very much about 61 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:33,960 Speaker 1: Belinda Carlisle before I did the interview. She had been 62 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,720 Speaker 1: on my talk show. But you really don't have time 63 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:40,120 Speaker 1: to do in depth interviews and daytime TV. It's five 64 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:42,880 Speaker 1: minutes if you're lucky, seven minutes if you go over. 65 00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:46,360 Speaker 1: But to have a full hour or forty minutes forty 66 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:48,839 Speaker 1: five minutes to talk to someone, you really do get 67 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:50,360 Speaker 1: to know them. And most of the people that I've 68 00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:53,080 Speaker 1: had on the show I already was friendly with. I 69 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:56,120 Speaker 1: already know them, and like Ricky Lake, it's very different 70 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:59,200 Speaker 1: to interview someone and find out who they are. And 71 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,320 Speaker 1: I came to really really like her. I mean, I 72 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:04,040 Speaker 1: like her so much. I was like, I want to 73 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:04,760 Speaker 1: hang out with her. 74 00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:05,040 Speaker 2: You know. 75 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:11,480 Speaker 1: She was honest and forthright and wonderful discussion about parenting 76 00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:17,120 Speaker 1: and about sobriety and just about life. And I love 77 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:19,680 Speaker 1: it when women embrace the age that they are and 78 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,039 Speaker 1: everybody is on the journey and we're all going the 79 00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:26,080 Speaker 1: same place. So old age man, it's not as bad 80 00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:29,680 Speaker 1: as they say. So we have Blinda Carlyle and she's 81 00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:32,200 Speaker 1: fantastic and stick around. At the end of the show, 82 00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 1: we'll do some questions from you the listeners. Thank you 83 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:37,039 Speaker 1: so much, Blinda Carlyle. 84 00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:52,520 Speaker 3: Right now, well, hello Belinda Carlile, Hello Rasierdana. 85 00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:55,239 Speaker 1: I haven't seen you in so many years. 86 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:58,560 Speaker 2: I now I remember the last time it was. It 87 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:01,200 Speaker 2: was at the TV studio. That's right, and they all 88 00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:04,320 Speaker 2: rolled down with a massive hangover. I'm so sorry about that. 89 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:07,480 Speaker 1: But that's okay. I have loved doing all my research 90 00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:10,080 Speaker 1: about you and finding out that your life was not 91 00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:11,560 Speaker 1: at all what I had imagined. 92 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,400 Speaker 2: Well I know, I think, I think it's yeah, it's 93 00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:18,479 Speaker 2: it's it was, it has been and stillia is quite 94 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:18,920 Speaker 2: a life. 95 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:22,359 Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, and I read about you. 96 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:22,520 Speaker 4: Know. 97 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:25,279 Speaker 1: This is how silly I felt reading this. I know 98 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:27,880 Speaker 1: all the words to the Go Gos and everything, but 99 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:29,719 Speaker 1: I didn't realize it was a punk band. 100 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:32,520 Speaker 2: We started out if it was. Yeah, we started out 101 00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:36,320 Speaker 2: in the punk Stain in nineteen seventy eight when everybody 102 00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:38,560 Speaker 2: was in a bad It was like fifty kids. All 103 00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:40,640 Speaker 2: the kids were in bands and they were horrible. So 104 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:42,359 Speaker 2: we thought, well, we can start a band and be 105 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:46,080 Speaker 2: horrible too, right, And it was actually cooler to be horrible. 106 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:50,640 Speaker 2: So that's how the Go Go started. And we had 107 00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:52,400 Speaker 2: no idea how to do anything. 108 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:54,560 Speaker 1: How did you know each other? Did you put an 109 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,240 Speaker 1: ad for a band or were you friends? No? 110 00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:59,560 Speaker 2: We just like we knew each other from the punk Stain. 111 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:01,160 Speaker 2: Like I said, there were like fifty kids in the 112 00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:06,760 Speaker 2: very beginning. It exploded really quickly, but we all kinda 113 00:06:06,839 --> 00:06:10,600 Speaker 2: knew each other. And Margo, the original bass player, and 114 00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:14,039 Speaker 2: I were friends and she said. We were sitting on 115 00:06:14,080 --> 00:06:16,440 Speaker 2: a curb one night at a party in Venice, California, 116 00:06:16,920 --> 00:06:19,320 Speaker 2: and she said, let's form a band. And I said 117 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:21,080 Speaker 2: I wanted to play bass, and she goes, no, I'm 118 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:25,200 Speaker 2: playing bass. You can play, you can play drums, or 119 00:06:25,240 --> 00:06:28,360 Speaker 2: you can sing. And I had played well the drummer 120 00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:30,600 Speaker 2: that never played in a punk band called the Germs, 121 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:33,400 Speaker 2: and so I said, okay, I sing, and that's how 122 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:35,320 Speaker 2: it started. I had never sung before. 123 00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:35,800 Speaker 1: Wow. 124 00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 2: Jane wanted to play rhythm guitar. She had no idea. 125 00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:43,040 Speaker 2: We asked Charlotte to join because she knew how to 126 00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:48,920 Speaker 2: plug in a guitar into an amplifier, and that's how 127 00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:51,960 Speaker 2: the band started. But we started from absolute I mean, 128 00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:55,599 Speaker 2: Charlotte did have classical training, but none of us knew 129 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:57,960 Speaker 2: how to do anything. But that was the beauty of 130 00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:58,720 Speaker 2: the punk movement. 131 00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:01,800 Speaker 1: Did you have like the group? Was it the sex Pistols? 132 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,320 Speaker 1: Who was it that you were looking up to and 133 00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:06,840 Speaker 1: thinking that's the direction I want to go. Was there 134 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:09,320 Speaker 1: one band or there were a couple of bands. 135 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:12,920 Speaker 2: Actually a lot of well, first of all, the LA 136 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,720 Speaker 2: punk scene was amazing back then. There were some really 137 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:18,600 Speaker 2: like amazing bands that were ahead of their time. But 138 00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:22,680 Speaker 2: we looked to the UK and we were influenced by 139 00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:26,240 Speaker 2: the more melodic pop bands like the Buzzcocks and even 140 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:29,680 Speaker 2: the Clash. So and three of us grew up in 141 00:07:29,680 --> 00:07:34,440 Speaker 2: southern California with California radio, so that sort of California 142 00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:38,720 Speaker 2: melodic harmonies, beach boys, beach culture was kind of in 143 00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:41,760 Speaker 2: our DNA. So even though we started it as a 144 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:44,680 Speaker 2: punk band, we always had pop overtones. 145 00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, and then when. 146 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:49,840 Speaker 2: We became more musically proficient, it started sounding like a 147 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:52,200 Speaker 2: pop band and people were going, Oh my god, what's 148 00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:52,880 Speaker 2: going on here? 149 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:54,400 Speaker 1: What happened to them? 150 00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:56,480 Speaker 2: Exactly exactly. 151 00:07:56,680 --> 00:07:58,880 Speaker 1: I read that you opened when you were very young. 152 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:02,200 Speaker 1: You opened for Mad like our house Madness in the 153 00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:04,680 Speaker 1: middle of oh wow, what's that band? 154 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:10,720 Speaker 2: Yes, actually they really you know, meeting them was like 155 00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:14,280 Speaker 2: a big deal and you know, for the Go Gos, 156 00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:18,120 Speaker 2: because they asked us to come to the UK to 157 00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:23,520 Speaker 2: support them. So our manager, Ginger sold all of our belongings, everything, 158 00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:28,920 Speaker 2: and you know, Soldier car kept our apartment to finance 159 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:32,480 Speaker 2: our trip over to the UK. Because really at that time, 160 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:36,480 Speaker 2: before the age of information, you could say anything when 161 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:38,120 Speaker 2: you were there, you could say you were big stars, 162 00:08:38,160 --> 00:08:40,880 Speaker 2: which we did in the UK, we weren't. In fact, 163 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:44,120 Speaker 2: we kind of struggled, you know, opening for that band 164 00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:47,160 Speaker 2: because they had a whole other type of audience. It 165 00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:51,720 Speaker 2: was a lot of neo Nazis, a lot of a 166 00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:56,240 Speaker 2: lot of you know, mostly skinheads, very violent, you know, 167 00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 2: and so we had to open and play for these 168 00:08:58,200 --> 00:08:59,920 Speaker 2: It was scary, believe me, it was scary. 169 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:01,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, But at the. 170 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:06,320 Speaker 2: Same time we really honed our skills and became a 171 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:09,640 Speaker 2: really good little band from that whole time in the UK, 172 00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:12,600 Speaker 2: we opened for the Specials and a lot of the 173 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:15,920 Speaker 2: two tone bands Wow, and we would ride home and 174 00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:18,559 Speaker 2: say what big stars we were. People didn't know better. 175 00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:22,640 Speaker 2: And we came back to la after, you know, after 176 00:09:22,679 --> 00:09:27,040 Speaker 2: three or four months, and you know, I guess our 177 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:29,720 Speaker 2: strategy worked because there were kids wrapped around the block 178 00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:32,320 Speaker 2: Wow to come see us at the Star would Yeah. 179 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:35,320 Speaker 1: And it was really a meteoric rise, like it was 180 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:38,640 Speaker 1: like two years from start to you were on the 181 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:40,400 Speaker 1: pop Jarks, right. 182 00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:42,960 Speaker 2: I mean, it went so fast. We formed the band 183 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:47,240 Speaker 2: in nineteen seventy eight, and in nineteen eighty one we 184 00:09:47,280 --> 00:09:48,720 Speaker 2: were the biggest band in America. 185 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,880 Speaker 1: Now, how in earth did you survive that? 186 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:55,800 Speaker 2: Well, I mean, well, you know, as you do, as 187 00:09:55,880 --> 00:10:00,360 Speaker 2: most bands do with drugs and right exactly, but I 188 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:05,280 Speaker 2: mean to go from zero to one hundred and being 189 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:08,520 Speaker 2: self taught, we didn't have like a Simon Cowell or 190 00:10:08,559 --> 00:10:11,960 Speaker 2: a Svengale. We did all ourselves and it was a 191 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:17,480 Speaker 2: female operation, female roadies, female management, no boys allowed, no 192 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:21,320 Speaker 2: boyfriends around. And yeah, I mean that's kind of been 193 00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:23,559 Speaker 2: heard of, really and when you think, you know, when 194 00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:26,240 Speaker 2: you think about it, I mean, three years is nothing. 195 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 1: No, especially in show biz you kidding? Yeah, yeah, years. 196 00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:32,200 Speaker 1: Usually you're waiting tables for a decade and then you 197 00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:34,920 Speaker 1: get a break, you know exactly exactly. I know for 198 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:37,480 Speaker 1: me kind of when my show took off, it sort 199 00:10:37,480 --> 00:10:40,199 Speaker 1: of felt like that too, like a like a rocket 200 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:43,200 Speaker 1: shipped me up to a different place and for a 201 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:46,640 Speaker 1: while you totally are disoriented, y don't even really act. 202 00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:49,720 Speaker 1: And I read read tell me if this is true 203 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:53,080 Speaker 1: that you had fear of imposter syndrome, which I believe 204 00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:54,880 Speaker 1: every artist has. 205 00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:57,840 Speaker 2: Oh I probably I would say that they do. Most 206 00:10:57,880 --> 00:11:00,840 Speaker 2: every artist does. And yes, it was. I mean, it 207 00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:04,280 Speaker 2: was a combination of the way I grew up, you know, 208 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:08,800 Speaker 2: and you know, in a very strict sort of Christian family. 209 00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:14,360 Speaker 2: And it was partly because three years is nothing, you know, 210 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:16,559 Speaker 2: and all of our musician friends who had been working 211 00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:20,320 Speaker 2: for decades achieved nothing, and then here we were after 212 00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:23,240 Speaker 2: three years, I mean, like the biggest man in America 213 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:24,080 Speaker 2: for five minutes. 214 00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:27,400 Speaker 1: So yeah, more than five minutes, honey. That was That 215 00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:32,400 Speaker 1: was a pretty wild long run more with Belinda Carlisle 216 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:56,560 Speaker 1: After this, I read every interview, so bear with me. 217 00:11:56,880 --> 00:12:01,600 Speaker 1: But you spoke about them always commenting on your weight, 218 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:04,440 Speaker 1: which you know, I didn't remember that as being a 219 00:12:04,480 --> 00:12:06,439 Speaker 1: thing with you, to tell you the truth, maybe because 220 00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:08,640 Speaker 1: I had my own issues with weight. You just were right, 221 00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:11,360 Speaker 1: the beautiful one in the go gos right that you 222 00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:14,600 Speaker 1: were always the face of the go gos right right, 223 00:12:14,679 --> 00:12:16,839 Speaker 1: And that must have put a lot of pressure as 224 00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:19,640 Speaker 1: you were how old you were so young, I was. 225 00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:24,360 Speaker 2: Let's see, twenty three years old. I never thought about 226 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 2: my weight. I never had a problem with my weight 227 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:30,000 Speaker 2: and the way I looked. And I guess because I 228 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:33,440 Speaker 2: was normal, you know, or sort of normal, like a 229 00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:37,040 Speaker 2: pretty young girl. But I was cute and chubby. I 230 00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:39,920 Speaker 2: was pretty and plump. I'd been hitting the deli trays 231 00:12:40,240 --> 00:12:42,840 Speaker 2: and that really really messes with your brain as a 232 00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:47,240 Speaker 2: young girl, and it was very, very damaging. And you know, 233 00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:50,560 Speaker 2: I mean it was like that up until fairly recently, 234 00:12:50,640 --> 00:12:53,440 Speaker 2: but now it's and I love this with women, it's 235 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 2: their name and then how old you are? Totally and 236 00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:01,719 Speaker 2: don't do that to men. It's like Evelynda of sixty four, 237 00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:06,280 Speaker 2: she's sixty four, right, So how did that feel for you? 238 00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:08,400 Speaker 2: I never had an issue with my age. I still 239 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:10,760 Speaker 2: really don't, but when I turned sixty, it was kind 240 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:13,800 Speaker 2: of like whoa sixty? You know, that was the one 241 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,400 Speaker 2: that made me think, like because in my mind, sixty 242 00:13:16,559 --> 00:13:20,120 Speaker 2: is like Sada Thompson from Family, you know, Ethel from 243 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:20,679 Speaker 2: I Love. 244 00:13:20,559 --> 00:13:24,040 Speaker 1: Lucy, Like, it's not like you, Belinda Carlisle. You know. 245 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:28,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, well, I mean, as we know, it's inevitable. 246 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:31,880 Speaker 2: And I think for me it's not so much the 247 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:35,960 Speaker 2: physicality of it, but it was like finally realizing that 248 00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:40,560 Speaker 2: maybe I have another twenty twenty five years, yes, you know, 249 00:13:40,840 --> 00:13:45,960 Speaker 2: and I've had sixty that they've flown right by each maybe, 250 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:49,280 Speaker 2: and you know, sixty four now, But yeah, it was 251 00:13:49,360 --> 00:13:54,240 Speaker 2: just weird, like on a psychological sort of level. You know, 252 00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:56,680 Speaker 2: of course it's not great. You know, seeing your body 253 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:57,880 Speaker 2: is sort of like you. 254 00:13:57,840 --> 00:13:59,040 Speaker 1: Know, betray you. 255 00:14:00,520 --> 00:14:03,240 Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, but I mean that's just the way it is. 256 00:14:03,280 --> 00:14:05,080 Speaker 2: So I could kind of accept that. It was just 257 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:10,040 Speaker 2: see the like, wow, I mean, I'm like three quarters 258 00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:12,960 Speaker 2: of my life have you know, it's it's done. 259 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:16,200 Speaker 1: It's why that's why I name this show Onward, because 260 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:19,040 Speaker 1: I hit sixty and I was like, everything in the past, 261 00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:22,040 Speaker 1: I'm leaving in the past, onward to the last twenty 262 00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:23,160 Speaker 1: five years, you know. 263 00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:27,840 Speaker 2: Right right right, And I think that, I mean, you know, 264 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:31,080 Speaker 2: I'm probably even more active than I was in my 265 00:14:31,160 --> 00:14:35,200 Speaker 2: thirties and doing you know, lets of great crazy things. 266 00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:37,360 Speaker 2: But and it is just a number. And I was 267 00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:39,520 Speaker 2: talking to a friend and he goes, so, let's just 268 00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:42,600 Speaker 2: face it, we're old, and I was like, excuse me, 269 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:45,800 Speaker 2: and you know, I mean, I am sixty four. But 270 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:50,920 Speaker 2: I think old is like it it's like really negative. 271 00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:53,600 Speaker 2: Take on its Yeah, it doesn't have to be negative 272 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:54,040 Speaker 2: at all. 273 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:57,400 Speaker 1: Right, there's a way, in a way that you're given 274 00:14:57,520 --> 00:15:00,960 Speaker 1: the uh, everybody knows that you have some wisdom to 275 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:03,720 Speaker 1: share when you're all right. When I'm on a set now, 276 00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:06,960 Speaker 1: I'm like the Angela Lansbury. You know, I'm the oldest 277 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,960 Speaker 1: woman on the set and they're all young kids and 278 00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:13,240 Speaker 1: ask me what was it like back then? And you know, 279 00:15:13,320 --> 00:15:15,360 Speaker 1: you start to think, how did it go this fast? 280 00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:17,560 Speaker 1: And you know, where did you grow up? Did you 281 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:18,920 Speaker 1: grow up in La? Yeah? 282 00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:21,080 Speaker 2: I grew up in southern California. I did. 283 00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:23,520 Speaker 1: And you were the oldest of seven children. 284 00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:26,560 Speaker 2: Yes, I was. Yeah, it was a guinea pig, yeah, 285 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:29,040 Speaker 2: and yeah, I mean it was a great place to 286 00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:32,720 Speaker 2: grow up, California. It was amazing back then. And you know, 287 00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:36,720 Speaker 2: a typical dysfunctional family, right, but that's what that's my 288 00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:37,520 Speaker 2: formative years. 289 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,640 Speaker 1: We're in California and your dad had a drinking problem, 290 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:43,360 Speaker 1: and your stepdad or just your stepdad. 291 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,720 Speaker 2: Just my stepdad. My dad left when we were I 292 00:15:45,840 --> 00:15:49,040 Speaker 2: was about five and I didn't really know him, but 293 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:53,360 Speaker 2: my stepfather did. He was a terrible alcoholic, but he 294 00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:57,960 Speaker 2: got sober right after I left home. So, you know, 295 00:15:58,280 --> 00:16:02,160 Speaker 2: I mean, going through my issue of addiction and alcoholism myself, 296 00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:07,600 Speaker 2: I you know, I forgave him, you know, for because 297 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:09,800 Speaker 2: he was abusa. Then you know, I mean back then, 298 00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,680 Speaker 2: kids were beaten with the belt and that's how it 299 00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:16,600 Speaker 2: was done and totally and you know it was it 300 00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:20,480 Speaker 2: was harsh, but that's all he knew. And you know, 301 00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:23,040 Speaker 2: I mean he was actually when he got sober, like 302 00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:25,320 Speaker 2: an amazing, beautiful human being. 303 00:16:25,440 --> 00:16:26,000 Speaker 1: No kidding. 304 00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:28,280 Speaker 2: It wasn't when I was growing up, that's for sure. 305 00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:31,000 Speaker 1: Now when you had your son, did you go through 306 00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:33,800 Speaker 1: moments of going, I gotta, I gotta cut this back, 307 00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:36,080 Speaker 1: because I know what it did to me when there 308 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:39,240 Speaker 1: was drinking an alcoholic behavior in the house or did 309 00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:41,760 Speaker 1: it not sort of register until you were ready to 310 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:42,240 Speaker 1: be done? 311 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:46,240 Speaker 2: It didn't register until I was ready? Well, it registered well, okay. 312 00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:49,280 Speaker 2: I was always to be able to witness myself, even 313 00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:53,280 Speaker 2: when I was like ten, I always had me and 314 00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:55,680 Speaker 2: then I had this. It was weird. I could always 315 00:16:55,720 --> 00:16:59,200 Speaker 2: do that. So even in my when I was like 316 00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:02,880 Speaker 2: way out there, I could always go, okay, you know 317 00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:08,000 Speaker 2: you you know, are a mess and you know you 318 00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:10,639 Speaker 2: need to get it together. So I always knew, but 319 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:15,800 Speaker 2: I really had no interest really in cleaning it up. 320 00:17:16,119 --> 00:17:18,160 Speaker 2: I was doing it for other people, not for myself. 321 00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:21,359 Speaker 1: Had you tried to get sober before for other people? 322 00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, I did it the first time after the go 323 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:28,399 Speaker 2: gos broke up. I did my version, which was I 324 00:17:28,440 --> 00:17:32,399 Speaker 2: couldn't drink but no cost wine, just wine, just wine, 325 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:36,200 Speaker 2: you know, and and no cope, no pills. I could 326 00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:41,320 Speaker 2: do acid and hallucinogens. That was fine, and that's how 327 00:17:41,359 --> 00:17:45,560 Speaker 2: I functioned for a good five seven years. And then 328 00:17:45,880 --> 00:17:49,359 Speaker 2: of course that does not work, so and then it 329 00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:56,240 Speaker 2: took me another another fifteen seventeen years of you know, drama, 330 00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:00,920 Speaker 2: drop pain and suffering and drama. And I was like, okay, 331 00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:03,000 Speaker 2: I'm ready. And then when I was ready, I was ready. 332 00:18:03,280 --> 00:18:06,240 Speaker 2: It was like not, I was down, not an issue. 333 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:08,480 Speaker 1: And did you go to a twelve step? Did you 334 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:09,280 Speaker 1: do the whole? 335 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:09,760 Speaker 2: Yeah? 336 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:11,880 Speaker 1: I did blue book everything good for you. 337 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:16,159 Speaker 2: I got a sponsor, and you know, I've done you know, 338 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:19,399 Speaker 2: I did the invent personal inventory, which I likened to 339 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:24,240 Speaker 2: wearing cement and rubber boots and treading through quicksand which. 340 00:18:24,119 --> 00:18:27,119 Speaker 1: Was like it was so it's hard to do. 341 00:18:28,119 --> 00:18:30,439 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I really had a lot of blocks with that, 342 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:33,200 Speaker 2: but I'm so glad I did it, and I've done 343 00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:37,440 Speaker 2: it twice, actually gone through the steps twice now. But yeah, 344 00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:39,520 Speaker 2: I mean that's the only thing I mean I tried 345 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:40,320 Speaker 2: doing it my way. 346 00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:43,800 Speaker 1: Didn't work, don't we all right? Ye? Yeah, exactly we 347 00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:47,159 Speaker 1: got a handle on this, you know, exactly exactly you 348 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:49,119 Speaker 1: don't have a handle on it. When you say I 349 00:18:49,119 --> 00:18:50,760 Speaker 1: don't have a handle on it and you have to 350 00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:53,360 Speaker 1: say it, you know, did the others try Did they 351 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:55,960 Speaker 1: try to do it to vengeance? Did they? Because I 352 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,600 Speaker 1: read that your son has said he had no idea 353 00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:02,880 Speaker 1: that you were using drugs or drinking to excess through 354 00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:05,280 Speaker 1: his childhood, that he doesn't have a memory of that. 355 00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:08,800 Speaker 2: I think he did once when I was really I mean, 356 00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:11,520 Speaker 2: I came on from a trip and I had taken 357 00:19:11,560 --> 00:19:14,920 Speaker 2: some pills and I was like slurring and stumbling around 358 00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:17,680 Speaker 2: the kitchen, and that's when he kind of he kind 359 00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:19,840 Speaker 2: of knew. And my husband's like, go to bed, you know, 360 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:23,959 Speaker 2: we don't want you around right now. And he didn't know. 361 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,320 Speaker 2: But I think part of, you know, he probably buried 362 00:19:27,359 --> 00:19:31,439 Speaker 2: a lot of it because sure, yeah, you know, but 363 00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:35,280 Speaker 2: you know, it's it's it was when I was ready. 364 00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:35,960 Speaker 2: I was ready. 365 00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:39,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, do you have advice? Like we have someone in 366 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:42,520 Speaker 1: our family and it's you know, it's very difficult when 367 00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:45,399 Speaker 1: there's a lot of you know, drug abuse, and someone 368 00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:48,679 Speaker 1: told me somebody who's in AA and I go to 369 00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:52,520 Speaker 1: alan On and I go to try to help myself 370 00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:58,000 Speaker 1: get through this difficult time with her, and you know, 371 00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:01,120 Speaker 1: they said, if one more person to save me, I'd 372 00:20:01,119 --> 00:20:05,600 Speaker 1: be dead, right, Yeah, totally almost. The trying to help 373 00:20:05,880 --> 00:20:06,560 Speaker 1: doesn't help. 374 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:10,200 Speaker 2: It doesn't help. I mean, I can't tell you. And 375 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:14,880 Speaker 2: as as when I was drinking and using the promises 376 00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:17,680 Speaker 2: that I made never again, and I meant them and 377 00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:20,320 Speaker 2: really meant what I said, but I knew way to 378 00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:21,800 Speaker 2: down on the side, there was no way I could 379 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:23,560 Speaker 2: keep my promise even though I wanted to. 380 00:20:23,840 --> 00:20:24,480 Speaker 1: And I meant to. 381 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:28,760 Speaker 2: But I mean the advice because I'm actually I have 382 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:32,320 Speaker 2: a friend right now that's really suffering from a partner 383 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,880 Speaker 2: who is just way out there. 384 00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 1: You know. 385 00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:37,800 Speaker 2: I mean, I've been through the drama on both sides 386 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:40,640 Speaker 2: of the drama, and I just I would just say 387 00:20:41,119 --> 00:20:43,720 Speaker 2: alan On. The big books from alan On is amazing. 388 00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:48,040 Speaker 2: It's amazing total, you know, and there's a few there's 389 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,120 Speaker 2: a really forgot the name of the book, but there's 390 00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,760 Speaker 2: a classic codependent codependent no. 391 00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:53,359 Speaker 1: More, no more. 392 00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:58,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's an amazing Yeah, she's amazing and that's that 393 00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:02,400 Speaker 2: book I recommend, and I say, and I tell him, 394 00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:06,360 Speaker 2: you just let go save yourself. Whatever happens with him 395 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:09,359 Speaker 2: is gonna happen. You can't do anything about it. In fact, 396 00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:10,159 Speaker 2: it makes it worse. 397 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:13,720 Speaker 1: But it's so hard, and it's so hard, it's so 398 00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,000 Speaker 1: so hard. When you let go, you think, what if 399 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,280 Speaker 1: the worst happens? You know, but that is going to happen, 400 00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:22,560 Speaker 1: and maybe that's gonna change the behavior, maybe you. 401 00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:27,080 Speaker 2: Know exactly exactly, and hanging on doesn't really how And 402 00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:29,680 Speaker 2: if anything happened when you were hanging on, you would 403 00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:30,560 Speaker 2: blame yourself too. 404 00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:33,359 Speaker 1: So well, that's the other thing, you know. I try 405 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:36,679 Speaker 1: to say, I can't do anymore until you're ready to 406 00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:40,240 Speaker 1: get well, and yeah, and then I find myself doing 407 00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:43,280 Speaker 1: more because I feel like guilty. And then I go, oh, 408 00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,040 Speaker 1: now I'm really not gonna do it, you know. Yeah, 409 00:21:46,080 --> 00:21:48,080 Speaker 1: I know from the book. I know from going to 410 00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:50,600 Speaker 1: alan On that that's the worst thing you can do 411 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:54,600 Speaker 1: is to be to give in, you know. Yeah, but 412 00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:55,480 Speaker 1: we can't help. 413 00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:59,520 Speaker 2: It sometimes, No, No, it's it's uh, you know, especially 414 00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:02,159 Speaker 2: if you're really loved the person, and it's you know, 415 00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:06,840 Speaker 2: my husband stuck around for years and I don't think 416 00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:09,120 Speaker 2: if I had carried on, I don't think he'd be around. 417 00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:13,160 Speaker 2: But I remember when after I during the first week 418 00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:15,119 Speaker 2: after sobriety, I had to go to London to go 419 00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:17,880 Speaker 2: to work, and all of a sudden it just hit 420 00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:21,159 Speaker 2: me all the pain that I caused people around me, 421 00:22:21,880 --> 00:22:25,080 Speaker 2: and I had like a breakdown in the middle of Herod's. 422 00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:28,600 Speaker 2: And so I called him and I said, why did 423 00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:30,800 Speaker 2: you Why did you stick around? 424 00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:31,359 Speaker 4: You know? 425 00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:33,440 Speaker 1: And and he said I could. 426 00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:38,199 Speaker 2: Always see the real you underneath all the crap, you know, 427 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:43,080 Speaker 2: and Beau, yeah, and so you know. But but he, 428 00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,320 Speaker 2: I mean, he was there, but he backed way off 429 00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:49,159 Speaker 2: the last few years, you know, and you know, he 430 00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:51,480 Speaker 2: would get really pissed off with me and everything when 431 00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:55,000 Speaker 2: i'd like go on a bender. But I think if 432 00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:57,440 Speaker 2: I had carried on, he probably would have walked to Ben. 433 00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:59,639 Speaker 1: How long have you been married? It's a miracle with 434 00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:02,119 Speaker 1: all of the time that you were not ready to 435 00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:04,840 Speaker 1: get well and you've been married over thirty years, right. 436 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:07,000 Speaker 2: We've been together thirty nine years? 437 00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:11,320 Speaker 1: Oh, congratulations in carlesle so change. You know a lot 438 00:23:11,359 --> 00:23:14,880 Speaker 1: of difficult circumstances too. It wasn't like a cake walk for. 439 00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:17,800 Speaker 2: You now, for for either of us to be honest. 440 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:20,160 Speaker 1: What does he do? Is he in the recording industry 441 00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:20,760 Speaker 1: or no? 442 00:23:20,760 --> 00:23:22,919 Speaker 2: No, no, he's just he does a lot of financial 443 00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:27,320 Speaker 2: staff and and he's retired now he's into his finance 444 00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:30,920 Speaker 2: thing and and playing around with that. And no he doesn't. 445 00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:33,080 Speaker 2: He's not in the music business. He doesn't manage me. 446 00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:35,600 Speaker 2: He suggests that at once a long time a guy's 447 00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:38,040 Speaker 2: in no way, you know, it's just very smart. 448 00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:41,080 Speaker 1: Youp it separate, youep it separate. And is you have 449 00:23:41,119 --> 00:23:44,360 Speaker 1: one child? You ever want a son? And how when? 450 00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:46,119 Speaker 1: How how old was he when he came out to you? 451 00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:51,080 Speaker 2: He was fourteen? And he I mean, I always kind 452 00:23:51,119 --> 00:23:55,200 Speaker 2: of knew, you know, yeah, they're like they're like little 453 00:23:55,359 --> 00:23:56,760 Speaker 2: little hands along the way. 454 00:23:56,920 --> 00:23:58,000 Speaker 1: Sure, yeah, of course. 455 00:23:58,720 --> 00:24:01,560 Speaker 2: But but I was saying when we went on a 456 00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:05,560 Speaker 2: little afternoon trip to this lake near where we lived, 457 00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:08,240 Speaker 2: and he said, mom, I have something to tell you. 458 00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:12,280 Speaker 2: Or I was driving and he said, I like boys, 459 00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:12,840 Speaker 2: and I went. 460 00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:18,240 Speaker 1: And I had to stop signing, damn it. 461 00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:21,879 Speaker 2: And I had to pull over and catch my and 462 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:24,600 Speaker 2: catch my breath. Even though listen, all my friends since 463 00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:26,200 Speaker 2: I was in high school have been ninety percent of 464 00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:29,560 Speaker 2: be garre lesbian, right, and but when it's your child, 465 00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:31,600 Speaker 2: it's like the first thing I thought of is what 466 00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:33,720 Speaker 2: kind of world is he going to have to put 467 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:37,280 Speaker 2: up with, especially living in provincial France, I mean where 468 00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:41,600 Speaker 2: it's very very kind of old fashioned, you know, very traditional. 469 00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:45,040 Speaker 1: So that was like a. 470 00:24:45,080 --> 00:24:48,320 Speaker 2: Whole that was like a really like a whole thing. 471 00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:53,440 Speaker 2: Because he had been coached by p Flag. It is 472 00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:57,359 Speaker 2: an amazing organization on how to come out. So and 473 00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:58,720 Speaker 2: since then I've done a lot of we do a 474 00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:02,520 Speaker 2: lot of work together for Pea Flag great. But they 475 00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:04,920 Speaker 2: said come out to your mom my, momy d. Never 476 00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,479 Speaker 2: come out to your father because you don't know if 477 00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:09,840 Speaker 2: it's you don't know, you know, it's a reflection of 478 00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:12,800 Speaker 2: their masculinity, especially being an only son. 479 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:16,480 Speaker 1: So I thought, okay, don't tell dad. 480 00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:19,480 Speaker 2: I'm going to figure out how we're gonna you know, 481 00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:22,879 Speaker 2: even though my husband's like totally gay friendly, just like, 482 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:25,160 Speaker 2: don't say anything. So what does he do the next 483 00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,280 Speaker 2: day at school at the school assembly? 484 00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:32,359 Speaker 1: I am gay, Oh my god, I love him to 485 00:25:32,440 --> 00:25:35,560 Speaker 1: the whole school. What a brave young boy. 486 00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:39,199 Speaker 2: And so everybody though, because we lived in a small village, 487 00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:42,280 Speaker 2: you know, and friends. Everybody knew that he was gay 488 00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:46,159 Speaker 2: except for my husband. So I was like, okay, how 489 00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:48,840 Speaker 2: am I gonna you know? I went to my therapist 490 00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:50,720 Speaker 2: and how do I deal with this? And she said 491 00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:54,360 Speaker 2: let him tell him? And I said no, no, no, instinctively, no, 492 00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:56,159 Speaker 2: that's not that's not good. 493 00:25:56,560 --> 00:25:57,520 Speaker 1: So I did. 494 00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:01,040 Speaker 2: It took me about three months to even though I 495 00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:04,480 Speaker 2: knew it would be okay, it's still it's hard to say. 496 00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:07,760 Speaker 2: It's hard to say. So, yeah, I dropped. I dropped 497 00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:09,200 Speaker 2: Duke opic the bus stop. 498 00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:09,560 Speaker 1: It was. 499 00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:12,440 Speaker 2: It was like a junior in high school. I went 500 00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:15,240 Speaker 2: home and Morgan comes out of the shower where I said, 501 00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:18,240 Speaker 2: I have something to tell you, Dickie Lex boys, it's like, 502 00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:22,439 Speaker 2: he said, who cares? 503 00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:23,040 Speaker 1: What did he say? 504 00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:25,240 Speaker 2: He said, oh, this is just a phase. I said 505 00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:28,960 Speaker 2: I don't think so. So I said, you two deal 506 00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:32,320 Speaker 2: with it. Leave me out. You guys got to figure 507 00:26:32,320 --> 00:26:34,280 Speaker 2: it out. Because they would all be like, well he 508 00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:36,680 Speaker 2: said this, and he said that. I said, just leave 509 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:39,000 Speaker 2: me out. You guys have to figure it out. I'm 510 00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:42,120 Speaker 2: I'm I'm done. So it took them a good year 511 00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:45,560 Speaker 2: of like going back and forth, and Duke would get 512 00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:47,439 Speaker 2: mad about him, saying it's a phase. 513 00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:48,159 Speaker 1: You know. 514 00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:50,320 Speaker 2: It took about a year though for him to finally 515 00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:52,000 Speaker 2: accept the accept it. 516 00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:53,760 Speaker 1: Not that he he was he. 517 00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:58,199 Speaker 2: Was fine with it, but you know it's his only somebody. 518 00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:00,840 Speaker 1: Everybody needs time to adjust, even the gay people me. 519 00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:03,560 Speaker 1: You know, when you first figure out you're gay, whether 520 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:07,000 Speaker 1: you're ten or you're fifteen, you have to give yourself 521 00:27:07,119 --> 00:27:09,840 Speaker 1: some time to get used to the idea. And you 522 00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:12,679 Speaker 1: really have to give your family the courtesy of that 523 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:16,280 Speaker 1: time too, because it's a shock and it doesn't mean 524 00:27:16,359 --> 00:27:19,800 Speaker 1: that you're not loved, right, but an instant, you know, 525 00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:23,840 Speaker 1: reaction that some kids are so needy and wanting of 526 00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:26,320 Speaker 1: they don't want to be disowned by their family. It's 527 00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:28,440 Speaker 1: not always right at the right time, you. 528 00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:31,960 Speaker 2: Know, exactly exactly. So it all happened perfect, Okay, So 529 00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:35,359 Speaker 2: he was fourteen. He immediately got elected to a student 530 00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:38,160 Speaker 2: body president. And what the great thing is is that 531 00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:40,679 Speaker 2: like five or six kids came out right after hated 532 00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:43,680 Speaker 2: how great so it was. It was a really good thing. 533 00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's wonderful. You know, I have a little daughter 534 00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:48,600 Speaker 1: who's ten, I have four grown children in their twenties, 535 00:27:48,840 --> 00:27:53,240 Speaker 1: and I adopted a baby at fifty. You know, wow, Yes, 536 00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:56,600 Speaker 1: all my kids are adopted. But this baby has autism 537 00:27:56,680 --> 00:28:00,840 Speaker 1: and she's like very verbal, and about six months ago 538 00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:03,840 Speaker 1: she started telling me that her stuffed animals were non binary, 539 00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:06,800 Speaker 1: and I was like, really, I go, how do you know? 540 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,679 Speaker 1: She's like, I can tell. And then she starts telling 541 00:28:09,680 --> 00:28:14,600 Speaker 1: me about characters in her little video game thing she 542 00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:18,680 Speaker 1: plays that are non binary. And then finally she says, Mom, 543 00:28:18,920 --> 00:28:21,879 Speaker 1: I'm non binary. And I said, fantastic. What do you 544 00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:24,600 Speaker 1: want for dinner? You know, yeah, exactly, No, I don't 545 00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:26,480 Speaker 1: know where it's going to go. They say a large 546 00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:29,800 Speaker 1: percentage of autistic kids when they examine the thoughts the 547 00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:33,159 Speaker 1: way they do, they examine this, you know, in a 548 00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:37,640 Speaker 1: higher percentage than non autistic kids. But she's getting very 549 00:28:38,680 --> 00:28:42,080 Speaker 1: insistent on they them. So we went to a birthday 550 00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:44,760 Speaker 1: party for my eighty two year old friend, and my 551 00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:47,800 Speaker 1: eighty two year old friend said, hey, she wants something 552 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:50,320 Speaker 1: to drink, and she turns and says, it's they They 553 00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:54,480 Speaker 1: That is just eighty two. You gotta calm your role on. 554 00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:57,080 Speaker 2: That is so funny yea for her? 555 00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:57,640 Speaker 1: Look good? 556 00:28:57,680 --> 00:28:59,880 Speaker 2: You know, I mean Dick SETTI knew since it was 557 00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:02,640 Speaker 2: Evan when he fell in Love with the Boy on Casper, 558 00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:06,880 Speaker 2: the movie, you know, and I had there was one 559 00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:09,400 Speaker 2: thing he wouldn't mind me just saying this. But when 560 00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:12,360 Speaker 2: Broke Back Mountain came out, it was playing at our 561 00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:15,240 Speaker 2: local theater and I had to delay it for a 562 00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,080 Speaker 2: week because I had to work, and he threw like 563 00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:21,200 Speaker 2: a temper tantrum. I want to sit in the whole Wow, 564 00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:24,880 Speaker 2: you know so and you know they're like little hints 565 00:29:24,920 --> 00:29:25,640 Speaker 2: like that along the way. 566 00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:30,719 Speaker 1: So he's kind of responsible for your new EP Kidsman, exactly, 567 00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:34,920 Speaker 1: what a wonderful story this is. He had Starbucks just 568 00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:36,040 Speaker 1: hanging out. 569 00:29:36,320 --> 00:29:40,840 Speaker 2: Well, he never goes into the Starbucks, and he went 570 00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:45,160 Speaker 2: into the Starbucks on sunset and Diane Warren was there 571 00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:48,640 Speaker 2: and she never grows at that certain time. She went 572 00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:50,840 Speaker 2: always a little bit later. So he walked up to 573 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:54,320 Speaker 2: Diane and he said, I'm Belinda Carlile. Soon she went, 574 00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:56,480 Speaker 2: you know, and I'm not going to repeat what she's like, 575 00:29:56,760 --> 00:30:01,120 Speaker 2: she you know, swear, yeah, yeah she does. But she said, 576 00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:03,320 Speaker 2: get your mom on the phone. I have hits. So 577 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:04,840 Speaker 2: they called me and it was like out of the 578 00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:09,160 Speaker 2: blue because I was planning on slowing down and you know, 579 00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:12,880 Speaker 2: during my you know, I just living a quiet life, 580 00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:13,080 Speaker 2: you know. 581 00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:14,320 Speaker 1: Yes, And. 582 00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:17,800 Speaker 2: They called me and it was like on FaceTime and 583 00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:19,640 Speaker 2: She's going come to the studio. I have hits for you. 584 00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:23,240 Speaker 2: And I was like, well, do I have a choice? 585 00:30:23,360 --> 00:30:26,840 Speaker 2: First of all, because you don't say naughty Donnie R. Yeah, 586 00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:28,959 Speaker 2: but I was like, do I really want to do this? 587 00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:32,240 Speaker 2: It's like a big commitment and now I'm not in 588 00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:36,000 Speaker 2: this mindset now. And I went to the studio and 589 00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:39,440 Speaker 2: usually like I was kind of just I was done. 590 00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:42,120 Speaker 2: And I mean because my last two albums, so I 591 00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:44,560 Speaker 2: was in French, because because I lived in France for 592 00:30:44,600 --> 00:30:46,880 Speaker 2: twenty four years and I loved French bop. The other 593 00:30:46,920 --> 00:30:50,800 Speaker 2: one was Mantra chant every Day. So I thought, no, 594 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:55,240 Speaker 2: it never happened because good pop songs go to younger 595 00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,000 Speaker 2: artists or artists that are charting. 596 00:30:57,160 --> 00:30:58,760 Speaker 1: And I'm sixty four, right. 597 00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:03,800 Speaker 2: So I went to the studio and what she played me, 598 00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:05,960 Speaker 2: I was like, oh my god, this is amazing. I mean, 599 00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:07,120 Speaker 2: why are you giving it to me? 600 00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:08,920 Speaker 1: Yeah? 601 00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:14,560 Speaker 2: But no, but but it's true. So she played me 602 00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:17,160 Speaker 2: and I'm very fuscyd too. I'm not saying just everything 603 00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:19,160 Speaker 2: and just won't do it for the sake of doing it. 604 00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:22,120 Speaker 2: So she played me five really good songs and I 605 00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:25,640 Speaker 2: was like, yeah, let's do it. So that's how it happened. 606 00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:30,239 Speaker 2: It was a chance meeting, a couple of coincidences that 607 00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:33,480 Speaker 2: came about, and that's why it's called kismet. 608 00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:35,840 Speaker 1: Yeah. Do you believe in coincidences? I don't. 609 00:31:35,880 --> 00:31:37,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I don't think that. I don't think 610 00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:40,320 Speaker 2: there was such such thing. Now me either, I don't 611 00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:41,280 Speaker 2: think there's such thing. 612 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:44,560 Speaker 1: And the one that people that come into contact with 613 00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:47,520 Speaker 1: you and you with them, there's a meaning in something. Now, 614 00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:50,440 Speaker 1: whether or not we're back here enough to observe what 615 00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:53,200 Speaker 1: that is, won't that be a wonderful thing to be 616 00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:55,560 Speaker 1: able to figure all that out at the end. Perhaps 617 00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:58,520 Speaker 1: that's that's my dream of when we leave the body 618 00:31:58,600 --> 00:32:01,880 Speaker 1: and we're no longer using it, that we get to 619 00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:05,440 Speaker 1: sort of have a bird's eye view. Yeah, it's happening 620 00:32:05,480 --> 00:32:09,800 Speaker 1: and figure out kind of the thing exactly Confuse us? Well, 621 00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:11,640 Speaker 1: I'm doing course in miracles right now. 622 00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:17,040 Speaker 2: And one of the things that said, because it says, 623 00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:20,640 Speaker 2: basically there's no coincidences, but every encounter is a chance 624 00:32:20,720 --> 00:32:24,360 Speaker 2: to heal your childhood pain. And I love that, buddy. 625 00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:27,120 Speaker 2: I thought that's so great. And yeah, this was not 626 00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:29,920 Speaker 2: a coincidence. It was I was it was like the 627 00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:33,920 Speaker 2: universe saying, now you can't it's not the right time 628 00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:35,000 Speaker 2: to retire. 629 00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:38,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, exactly. I did it once when I left 630 00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:40,880 Speaker 1: my show. I was forty and my mom died at forty, 631 00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,840 Speaker 1: so I thought, I want to be an available mother 632 00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:46,280 Speaker 1: for my kids that she wasn't able to be like 633 00:32:46,560 --> 00:32:49,400 Speaker 1: the school parent and all that, you know, right, and 634 00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:51,880 Speaker 1: so I did that. But then, you know, you always 635 00:32:51,920 --> 00:32:55,200 Speaker 1: are drawn back by something that people you know, and 636 00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:58,959 Speaker 1: you find yourself doing something more creative and maybe different 637 00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:02,200 Speaker 1: than you had before. Did you ever have hobbies during that? 638 00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:03,760 Speaker 1: Did you when you were living in France, did you 639 00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:06,480 Speaker 1: learn to paint? Did you learn to do ceramics? 640 00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:06,920 Speaker 5: Well? 641 00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:09,960 Speaker 2: Those paintings are behind me. Two of them on the 642 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:14,280 Speaker 2: outside are mind fantastic. But yeah, I I took it 643 00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:17,520 Speaker 2: up during the pandemic again that was that was my hobby. 644 00:33:17,520 --> 00:33:20,800 Speaker 1: But in France, yeah. 645 00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:22,120 Speaker 2: I mean I got really into it. I mean, I 646 00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:24,480 Speaker 2: think getting into the French pop was like a hobby. 647 00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:27,120 Speaker 2: I mean, I'm a I eat books, I would read 648 00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:30,360 Speaker 2: all the time, and hiking. I was really into the 649 00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:34,320 Speaker 2: grail so I was like a grail freak. So and 650 00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:37,600 Speaker 2: Mary Magdalene freaks. So we lived in the area of 651 00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:41,000 Speaker 2: France where oh there was all those legends. So I 652 00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:45,040 Speaker 2: was really into, you know, looking for the grail. You know, 653 00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:47,680 Speaker 2: what is the whole grouse? That was like the big 654 00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:49,640 Speaker 2: hobby that I took up when I was in France. 655 00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:52,160 Speaker 1: Are you excited to go on tour now? Or does 656 00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:54,440 Speaker 1: it fill you with dread? It's a lot of work. 657 00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:57,360 Speaker 1: It's a lot of where people don't realize it. People 658 00:33:57,400 --> 00:33:59,720 Speaker 1: think you come for the concert and that's it. That's 659 00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:03,280 Speaker 1: oh boy, I've seen what it takes and it's a lot. Yeah, 660 00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:03,880 Speaker 1: it's a lot. 661 00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:04,800 Speaker 5: I just. 662 00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:09,480 Speaker 2: No, I'm not drowning out. I did. I just did 663 00:34:09,640 --> 00:34:12,839 Speaker 2: sixteen shows in three weeks in the UK. Wow, And 664 00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:15,440 Speaker 2: that like even for a twenty year old, that's really hard. 665 00:34:15,880 --> 00:34:19,880 Speaker 2: But I do have a whole It's a lot of physicality. 666 00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:23,640 Speaker 2: So I have a whole thing that I do and 667 00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:25,319 Speaker 2: I do it. I started doing it a month before 668 00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:28,200 Speaker 2: I go on the road, which my vocal exercises. I 669 00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:34,160 Speaker 2: do a ton of ton of uh breath work Prodayama. Yeah, 670 00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:36,719 Speaker 2: you know, I'm getting my lungs, you know, sort of 671 00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:38,000 Speaker 2: like ready up. 672 00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:38,640 Speaker 1: You ready to go? 673 00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:41,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, And then when I'm on the road, I mean 674 00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:44,400 Speaker 2: it's hard even if you're doesn't matter how you travel, 675 00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:48,759 Speaker 2: it's you know, it's still traveling. And yeah, and you 676 00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:51,040 Speaker 2: know you have the shows, you have, the sound checks, 677 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:52,080 Speaker 2: you have, you. 678 00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:55,520 Speaker 1: Know, the whole thing, the travel press, the endless press, right, 679 00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:57,960 Speaker 1: so you still have it. When you get into a city, 680 00:34:58,000 --> 00:34:59,880 Speaker 1: they make you do the morning radio stuff. 681 00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:01,680 Speaker 2: No, I won't do it anymore. 682 00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:02,440 Speaker 1: I just say no. 683 00:35:02,719 --> 00:35:05,040 Speaker 2: I just say no, No, it's too much at some point. 684 00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:08,879 Speaker 2: It's it's too much when you're twenty. It'd be way 685 00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:12,040 Speaker 2: too much at sixty four. So so no, I just 686 00:35:12,080 --> 00:35:15,359 Speaker 2: say no. I mean I should, but I can't do it. 687 00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,960 Speaker 2: I can't do I can't multitask that much anymore. 688 00:35:18,239 --> 00:35:19,200 Speaker 1: No, nor can I. 689 00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:21,919 Speaker 2: I mean I do like two weeks at a time, 690 00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:25,480 Speaker 2: and I do. I have it, so you know, two 691 00:35:25,560 --> 00:35:29,800 Speaker 2: on went off, two one went off, So it's it's fine, 692 00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:32,600 Speaker 2: but anything for months and months I have no desire 693 00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:36,040 Speaker 2: to do that. Yeah, and it's it's just it's just 694 00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:37,000 Speaker 2: really hard. You know. 695 00:35:37,160 --> 00:35:39,480 Speaker 1: I heard that you sold out all your shows in England. 696 00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:43,319 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that was pretty amazing because I was 697 00:35:43,360 --> 00:35:46,040 Speaker 2: saying too. I was doing an interview there and I 698 00:35:46,120 --> 00:35:49,279 Speaker 2: was saying, like, literally, twenty years ago, I was like 699 00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:55,200 Speaker 2: at a really like bad, bad, bad bad place, and 700 00:35:55,200 --> 00:35:58,440 Speaker 2: and it you know, I remember going to a venue 701 00:35:58,520 --> 00:36:01,799 Speaker 2: and twenty people should right, you know, and I was 702 00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:04,719 Speaker 2: playing the shitty club and and you know, I had 703 00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:07,480 Speaker 2: no backstage. It was like really dirty, and I thought, 704 00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:11,239 Speaker 2: this is like this is really bad. This is you know, 705 00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:15,479 Speaker 2: is this where her word ends? And then I got 706 00:36:15,680 --> 00:36:18,320 Speaker 2: new management. I cleaned up, you know, my act and everything, 707 00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:21,160 Speaker 2: and then it was like, uh, he had a lot, 708 00:36:21,239 --> 00:36:23,720 Speaker 2: played the long game. It's just building it back little 709 00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:26,640 Speaker 2: by little. I did festivals. I did all the small 710 00:36:26,680 --> 00:36:31,319 Speaker 2: clubs again, and then this last tour was like three 711 00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:33,600 Speaker 2: to five thousand a night, like sold out. 712 00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:34,719 Speaker 1: That's fantasmic. 713 00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:37,160 Speaker 2: I mean it was like it's kind of like a 714 00:36:38,080 --> 00:36:41,920 Speaker 2: nice little redemption story because it was really really really bad. 715 00:36:42,440 --> 00:36:45,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, and you really did sort of do it without 716 00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:48,759 Speaker 1: all of the public scrutiny. Now, maybe I missed it, 717 00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:51,440 Speaker 1: but you know, it's not like people are saying, oh, 718 00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:55,080 Speaker 1: crazy Belinda Carlisle out there drunk and drugged. You know, 719 00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:57,839 Speaker 1: like no one sort of you were. You were very 720 00:36:57,880 --> 00:37:00,839 Speaker 1: functioning drug addict and alcohol like it seems. 721 00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:04,080 Speaker 2: Well, yeah, except towards the end it was got pretty hard. 722 00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:07,000 Speaker 2: I wasn't showing up. I always I always took my 723 00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:10,799 Speaker 2: makeup off at nighttime too, and I would show up 724 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:13,520 Speaker 2: even though I wasn't good shape, but I'd show up. 725 00:37:13,800 --> 00:37:16,359 Speaker 2: But towards Theanna wouldn't even show up. So it was 726 00:37:16,680 --> 00:37:18,480 Speaker 2: it was it was time. 727 00:37:19,040 --> 00:37:21,640 Speaker 1: Yeah. So yeah, you know, and I'm proud of you. 728 00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:24,040 Speaker 1: I mean, that sounds scarid, but it's such a such 729 00:37:24,040 --> 00:37:27,400 Speaker 1: a huge accomplishment. You know, people think that if they 730 00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:29,920 Speaker 1: don't get sober the first time, it's all over, or 731 00:37:29,960 --> 00:37:32,640 Speaker 1: if it's been over this amount of years, forget it, 732 00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:35,360 Speaker 1: and your living testament to the fact that that's simply 733 00:37:35,400 --> 00:37:35,880 Speaker 1: not true. 734 00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:38,279 Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's like, I'm you know, you can teach 735 00:37:38,280 --> 00:37:43,440 Speaker 2: an old dog new tricks, basically. That's that's kind of 736 00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:46,120 Speaker 2: my story. You know, it took me a long time. 737 00:37:46,200 --> 00:37:48,920 Speaker 2: Forty seven was when I when I really got sober, 738 00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:51,239 Speaker 2: and I was like every day, I said, for since 739 00:37:51,280 --> 00:37:55,160 Speaker 2: I was seventeen, right probably before that. So yeah, it 740 00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:56,399 Speaker 2: took a while, but I got there. 741 00:37:56,560 --> 00:37:58,759 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a great that's a great story in your 742 00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:01,839 Speaker 1: book that you wrote about you getting sober. What what's 743 00:38:01,880 --> 00:38:06,680 Speaker 1: the name of that one. It's called Lips Unsealed. Lips Unsealed. Yeah, 744 00:38:06,719 --> 00:38:08,520 Speaker 1: I must have missed that because I would have known 745 00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:10,120 Speaker 1: all this so that when I was reading it, I 746 00:38:10,160 --> 00:38:14,560 Speaker 1: was like, I didn't know any that's journey right. Yeah. No, 747 00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:17,279 Speaker 1: you're lovely. I've been a fan of yours forever and 748 00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:20,680 Speaker 1: I'm always will be. You know somebody who was at 749 00:38:20,719 --> 00:38:24,399 Speaker 1: your concerts and on uh in Jones Beach believe. 750 00:38:24,239 --> 00:38:25,760 Speaker 2: Yes, yes, that's bitch. 751 00:38:26,920 --> 00:38:29,680 Speaker 1: We're right on the ocean there and still get outside 752 00:38:29,719 --> 00:38:32,600 Speaker 1: And it was fantastic and I loved having you on 753 00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:35,440 Speaker 1: my show. And it's great to hear you doing so well. Blind. 754 00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:38,440 Speaker 1: Thank you look beautiful. You look absolutely stunned. 755 00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:40,600 Speaker 2: Thank you, and thank you for having me. It's so 756 00:38:40,680 --> 00:38:41,319 Speaker 2: nice to talk to you. 757 00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:43,839 Speaker 1: And yes, it's great to see you again too, and 758 00:38:43,880 --> 00:39:08,360 Speaker 1: thank you for being here. Welcome back. That's Belinda Carlisle, 759 00:39:08,440 --> 00:39:10,799 Speaker 1: my new best friend. I just love her. I'm so 760 00:39:10,920 --> 00:39:13,160 Speaker 1: thankful she did the show and I got to know 761 00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:15,040 Speaker 1: a little bit more about her. I hope you enjoyed it. 762 00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:19,479 Speaker 1: We have some listener voice memos. That's you, guys. Here's 763 00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:20,680 Speaker 1: the first question hit it. 764 00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:25,640 Speaker 4: Hi, Rosie, my name is Kate. I am so happy 765 00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:28,799 Speaker 4: that you have started this podcast. When I tuned in 766 00:39:28,880 --> 00:39:31,480 Speaker 4: for the first time and heard your voice again, a 767 00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:35,000 Speaker 4: flood of memories came back to me. I am such 768 00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:37,160 Speaker 4: a fan of yours, and your show was a big 769 00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:40,400 Speaker 4: part of my childhood and a special thing I shared 770 00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:43,680 Speaker 4: with my mom every day we'd watch after school. And 771 00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:45,960 Speaker 4: I love that you talked about all the things her 772 00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:50,200 Speaker 4: and I loved Broadway musical theater Bet Midler. She even 773 00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:54,160 Speaker 4: surprised me once with tickets to your show. Now I'm 774 00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:57,560 Speaker 4: a mom of two kids myself, and my appreciation and 775 00:39:57,680 --> 00:40:01,160 Speaker 4: understanding for my mom became so much once I became 776 00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:05,719 Speaker 4: a mother. So my question for you is, if you 777 00:40:05,719 --> 00:40:08,640 Speaker 4: could ask your mom a question or a piece of 778 00:40:08,719 --> 00:40:13,239 Speaker 4: advice about parenthood, what would it be? Thank you so much? 779 00:40:14,600 --> 00:40:18,839 Speaker 1: Wow, Okay, thank you so much. It's beautiful. Really, you know, 780 00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:23,040 Speaker 1: it's so hard for me to imagine that I could, 781 00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:25,759 Speaker 1: as a grown up, have a mom. You know, my 782 00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:29,480 Speaker 1: mom's been gone since nineteen seventy three. I was the 783 00:40:29,520 --> 00:40:34,439 Speaker 1: age Dakota is now ten when she died, and it's 784 00:40:34,640 --> 00:40:37,600 Speaker 1: very overwhelming. I will tell you that the time I 785 00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:40,719 Speaker 1: missed my mother the most was when my children were 786 00:40:40,760 --> 00:40:43,879 Speaker 1: first placed in my arms. That was the I thought, Oh, 787 00:40:43,920 --> 00:40:46,640 Speaker 1: I wish my mother was here to see this. And 788 00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:50,359 Speaker 1: then when my son got engaged, I was overwhelmed with 789 00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:55,080 Speaker 1: emotion about wanting to tell my mother that my son 790 00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:58,319 Speaker 1: got engaged. So I'm not sure what I would ask 791 00:40:58,320 --> 00:41:03,400 Speaker 1: her if she were alone life now, but boy, I 792 00:41:03,400 --> 00:41:08,279 Speaker 1: would give anything for a conversation with her. I miss her. 793 00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:11,200 Speaker 1: I miss her every day and I would love to 794 00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:14,719 Speaker 1: know what kind of parental advice you would give me. 795 00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:17,400 Speaker 1: You know, thank you, Kate for the question. I appreciate 796 00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:19,640 Speaker 1: to give those kids a kiss, and we have one 797 00:41:19,680 --> 00:41:21,239 Speaker 1: more I think today, let's hit it. 798 00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:23,920 Speaker 5: Hey, Rosie, my name's Billy and I'm from Pittsburgh, and 799 00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:27,200 Speaker 5: I have a twofold question for you. Over the years, 800 00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:29,799 Speaker 5: you've had opportunities to meet celebrities from all kinds of 801 00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,000 Speaker 5: artistic fields, and some of them you mentioned were your heroes. 802 00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:36,400 Speaker 5: I can remember watching you when you had Barbara Streisan 803 00:41:36,480 --> 00:41:38,600 Speaker 5: on your show and how emotional that was for you 804 00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:41,960 Speaker 5: after meeting her. Was there any other celebrity that made 805 00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:43,600 Speaker 5: you feel that way? Or has it all just been 806 00:41:43,600 --> 00:41:47,160 Speaker 5: a normal human experience meeting people. I saw Maria Kerry 807 00:41:47,200 --> 00:41:48,680 Speaker 5: one time in concert and I was a few rows 808 00:41:48,719 --> 00:41:51,040 Speaker 5: away and she pointed at me and my legs went jelly. 809 00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,120 Speaker 5: The second part of my question, was there for a 810 00:41:54,120 --> 00:41:56,279 Speaker 5: moment when you had high hopes for meeting somebody they 811 00:41:56,320 --> 00:41:59,120 Speaker 5: obviously do not need to be named that turned out 812 00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:02,239 Speaker 5: to be not as you expected. Love your podcast and 813 00:42:02,480 --> 00:42:03,200 Speaker 5: have a great day. 814 00:42:04,000 --> 00:42:06,719 Speaker 1: Thank you, Billy, Thank you very very much. You know, 815 00:42:07,360 --> 00:42:11,560 Speaker 1: I kind of didn't have expectations of people. I was 816 00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:15,359 Speaker 1: always waiting to see what would be, you know. I 817 00:42:15,400 --> 00:42:17,840 Speaker 1: wanted to know who they were, and I was ready 818 00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:21,319 Speaker 1: to accept wherever it was that they were at. I 819 00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:25,760 Speaker 1: don't think of anyone specifically, but there was one guest 820 00:42:25,840 --> 00:42:30,839 Speaker 1: on the show that is a funny person, and I 821 00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:34,680 Speaker 1: expected a funny person, and it was kind of a 822 00:42:34,719 --> 00:42:39,000 Speaker 1: serious person, and I was very shocked at this. Now, 823 00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:42,160 Speaker 1: it wasn't like anything they did was wrong. It's just 824 00:42:42,280 --> 00:42:45,200 Speaker 1: like my expectation was it was going to be like 825 00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:47,600 Speaker 1: Marty Short. You know, Marty Short comes on your talk 826 00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:49,960 Speaker 1: show and you say one sentence to him, and he 827 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,400 Speaker 1: can go on for forty minutes and I will be 828 00:42:52,440 --> 00:42:55,160 Speaker 1: peeing in my pants. That's what happens when Marty Short 829 00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:58,000 Speaker 1: is around. So I was expecting a kind of Marty 830 00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:01,960 Speaker 1: Short intensity and energy, got sort of the opposite. The 831 00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:05,360 Speaker 1: actual person is kind of quiet and introverted, which I 832 00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:09,399 Speaker 1: did not expect because of their career. So there you go. 833 00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:11,399 Speaker 1: But there's nobody that I would go, oh my god, 834 00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:14,040 Speaker 1: I hated this person. You know, there really wasn't. But 835 00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:16,680 Speaker 1: thank you, Billy, thank you for your questions and everyone, 836 00:43:16,760 --> 00:43:19,640 Speaker 1: thank you for the comments. Really, thank you so much. 837 00:43:20,239 --> 00:43:24,920 Speaker 1: Next week we got Kristin chenow here. Cheno, my buddy, 838 00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:28,880 Speaker 1: the little pine size Prozac herself. She makes me so 839 00:43:29,000 --> 00:43:31,719 Speaker 1: happy and I love her so very much. She's here 840 00:43:31,719 --> 00:43:35,560 Speaker 1: and we have some intense conversations as always, So Kristin 841 00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:38,600 Speaker 1: Chenowick next week, and hope you enjoyed. Belinda Carlisle, and 842 00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:40,800 Speaker 1: thank you for finding us here at Onward