Speaker 1: How from Ryan Service?
Speaker 2: Ryan's Service?
Speaker 3: Hello?
Speaker 2: How are you Ryan's Service?
Speaker 4: Well?
Speaker 5: I'm good.
Speaker 2: What is that your is Ryan's Service? Is that your company?
Speaker 2: Or your name?
Speaker 3: That's my name?
Speaker 2: What do you be eating? What are you eating?
Speaker 6: Sake?
Speaker 4: Wow?
Speaker 2: What?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 5: How?
Speaker 2: How cooked is it?
Speaker 4: Is you?
Speaker 3: Rare?
Speaker 2: Do you like it?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Where did you cook it yourself?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: Who cooked it for you?
Speaker 7: My friend?
Speaker 2: Who's your friend?
Speaker 5: Noah Parry?
Speaker 2: You said your your friend's name is military or the
Speaker 2: military cooked it for you?
Speaker 6: All right?
Speaker 3: You gotta go?
Speaker 2: All right, I'm hungry, just kidding. I had a lot
Speaker 2: of marshmallows. Before this goes on, the live taking your
Speaker 2: phone calls every nine never goes. I'm just teaching you live. Hello.
Speaker 2: This is Lyle and this is the Therapy Echo podcast.
Speaker 2: It is a podcast about a lizard talking to people
Speaker 2: on the phone. If you have any questions, comments, feedback,
Speaker 2: or concerns, you can email me at Lyle Forever and
Speaker 2: Ever at gmail dot com. That's Lyle forever and Ever
Speaker 2: at gmail dot com. Thank you for listening. I hope
Speaker 2: you enjoy all.
Speaker 4: From Veronica.
Speaker 2: Yes, Hi, how are you Veronica?
Speaker 3: I'm done pretty well?
Speaker 1: How are you?
Speaker 2: I'm all right? I'm hanging out in this subway.
Speaker 3: Oh that sounds fun.
Speaker 2: What are you doing? Who's in the background.
Speaker 3: Who is in the background?
Speaker 8: Oh that's my sister.
Speaker 2: Can I talk to your sister?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 3: Why not, she's not of age.
Speaker 2: Oh I have a question for you. Yeah, are you interesting?
Speaker 3: I'd like to think so. I have a I have
Speaker 3: a very interesting career.
Speaker 2: What is your career?
Speaker 3: I am a romance ghost writer. I have written, uh,
Speaker 3: just finished my thirtieth book for other people, many of
Speaker 3: them New York Times bestsellers. They haven't written their work.
Speaker 6: It's me.
Speaker 2: Does it bother you that you write the work and
Speaker 2: then the other people get to take the credit?
Speaker 3: You know, at first it did. Because I'm also a
Speaker 3: serious like a serious author. I also have my own career,
Speaker 3: and it is not nearly as lucrative, but I get
Speaker 3: to explore some really interesting things, such as what.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 3: I've written just about every type of romance under the sun,
Speaker 3: with the exception of male pregnancy, but I've done everything else.
Speaker 2: I did not know that there were so many different
Speaker 2: types of romances.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, there's countless. There's fetishes for everything.
Speaker 2: One to write.
Speaker 3: So for as much kink as I write, I'm actually
Speaker 3: pretty ni less, so it's, uh, it's like a stretch
Speaker 3: for me to write base. But it's interesting because when
Speaker 3: you write, you have to get into the head of
Speaker 3: somebody else, right, So I've got to get into a
Speaker 3: headspace for all of these different kinks, these different types
Speaker 3: of people you get involved in the LGBTQ community, all
Speaker 3: of these different things where I don't necessarily fit. I've
Speaker 3: got to find a way in.
Speaker 2: For lots of So let me ask you a question.
Speaker 2: I'm curious. So I hope you don't find this insulting
Speaker 2: or anything. It's not meant to be. But if you've
Speaker 2: written thirty novels, right, and you're writing for all these
Speaker 2: high profile bestseller people, why don't you just write the
Speaker 2: thing yourself instead of writing for all these people.
Speaker 3: Unfortunately, publishing is a lot more than just writing books,
Speaker 3: Like real talk, the actual business side of it is
Speaker 3: really shitty. My own personal books are not selling nearly
Speaker 3: as well. To make the kind of money that I
Speaker 3: do writing for my current clients, it's a total MoneyGram.
Speaker 3: Now it's fuel. It funds my work so I can
Speaker 3: pay for editors, cover designers, marketing. I mean, I didn't
Speaker 3: I don't have a business degree, so it's it's a
Speaker 3: lot of work navigating the business side of writing. But
Speaker 3: if I just write smut for other people, it's fun
Speaker 3: and I get paid to do it. I get paid
Speaker 3: to watch porns. I get paid to write porns.
Speaker 2: That's my own. Ever turn you want? Yes, do you like? Hmmm?
Speaker 4: Do you have it?
Speaker 2: Do you do you ever like? What was I gonna say?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Do you have trouble writing for romantic genres that you
Speaker 2: personally don't find a rousing but are doing so just
Speaker 2: for the money?
Speaker 3: Yes, for example, a big one any industry to call
Speaker 3: them alpha holes. It's like the whole alpha male persona.
Speaker 3: It's not a thing for me at all. It's a
Speaker 3: huge turn off. I think you look like a douche
Speaker 3: if so like, it's not an appealing fantasy for me.
Speaker 3: But I have written a lot of them, and while
Speaker 3: it gets easier with time, it's still ah. My most
Speaker 3: recent project was like dragon Nails across my skin, trying
Speaker 3: to finish just because I found the lead male? Is
Speaker 3: that infuriating?
Speaker 2: Do you consider like you being aroused as like indication
Speaker 2: that your writing is good?
Speaker 4: So?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean it may be my imagination. But if
Speaker 3: I can get turned on someone else in their imagination,
Speaker 3: surely is I like that.
Speaker 2: That's how I kind of feel about like, you know,
Speaker 2: jokes or something you know, like if you're writing something
Speaker 2: and you're like, I think this is fun If I
Speaker 2: think this is funny, then we'll think it's funny.
Speaker 3: You're not the only one with that sense of humor.
Speaker 3: I'm not the only one who's turned on by certain things.
Speaker 3: Like it's a as long as you connect with somebody, man,
Speaker 3: it's good.
Speaker 2: Well what did you say?
Speaker 3: Your name was Veronica?
Speaker 2: Well, thank you for sharing Veronica. I I you know,
Speaker 2: maybe one day I'll be reading you and not knowing.
Speaker 3: I certainly hope. So thanks Gek, you.
Speaker 4: Have a good night, you too, all From hot Dog.
Speaker 9: Hot Dog, Hello, Gek, how are you?
Speaker 2: Are you interesting? Hot Dog?
Speaker 9: I have been told I'm very interesting. I think that
Speaker 9: might just be based off of how I was raised,
Speaker 9: or poor decision making led to a very interesting event
Speaker 9: in my life.
Speaker 2: Why did poor decision making lead you to believe that
Speaker 2: you are interesting?
Speaker 9: Because it has led to very interesting experiences and has
Speaker 9: shaped how I have grown as a person. I feel
Speaker 9: very desensitized to a lot of things based off of
Speaker 9: these decision making. Yes, I guess that's a good.
Speaker 2: Are you comfortable sharing any of these interesting events?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 9: I can share some.
Speaker 2: Let's see.
Speaker 9: Okay, well lets start when I was younger. That's like
Speaker 9: a good one. So when I was younger, my upstairs neighbor,
Speaker 9: she was my best friend. Her older sister used to
Speaker 9: sell candy, just like to make money for you know whatever.
Speaker 9: She her sister was like.
Speaker 2: Yes, normally I asked people to get closer to the mic,
Speaker 2: but can you get a tiny bit farther from the mic?
Speaker 9: How does that sound? Or actually give me one second?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I gotcha.
Speaker 9: Wait is that better?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 9: Okay, wonderful. So my friend's older sister used to sell candy,
Speaker 9: and that led to me wanting to buy candy from
Speaker 9: our older sister. So I would hustle around the neighborhood.
Speaker 9: And I was raised in a very low income neighborhood,
Speaker 9: so it was a little bit sketchy. But there was
Speaker 9: a pond behind our neighborhood. And at the same time,
Speaker 9: I had just found my mom's condoms and you know,
Speaker 9: other things around there. But I had stole I had
Speaker 9: stolen a string of condoms from my mom's drawer and
Speaker 9: I put two and two together, and I was like, oh,
Speaker 9: there are guppies and frogs and fish in this pond.
Speaker 9: And I had just gone to a fair recently, we
Speaker 9: around that time, and I thought that they were selling
Speaker 9: goldfish and like little bags and shit like that. So
Speaker 9: I took those condoms.
Speaker 3: I had.
Speaker 9: Basically done the same idea. I had taken the guppies
Speaker 9: from the pond and put them in the condoms, and
Speaker 9: I had been selling them to the kids around the neighborhood.
Speaker 2: And yeah, that was bags of fish, but they were
Speaker 2: in condom bags as opposed to little fish bags.
Speaker 9: Yes, but yeah, that had I had just wanted to
Speaker 9: buy candy from my friend's older sister.
Speaker 7: That was basically what.
Speaker 2: Was the going rate for a condom fish?
Speaker 9: Oh, it was like one dollar a bag, so not
Speaker 9: that much, and I think that was like pretty reasonable.
Speaker 2: The margins are I guess if you stole the condoms,
Speaker 2: the margins are pretty good.
Speaker 9: Yeah, yeah, that's not bad. I didn't know what condoms were.
Speaker 9: I was like eight or nine at this time. They
Speaker 9: were colorful too, so I thought they were like, you know,
Speaker 9: some sort of balloon or something like that. So yeah,
Speaker 9: a little bit but a little bit fucked up. So
Speaker 9: I guess that led to interesting decision making because I
Speaker 9: found that that did work for me. I did get
Speaker 9: candy from my friend's older sister, and uh, I guess
Speaker 9: I played a little bit of a part of my life.
Speaker 9: I think about that incident quite a lot because I
Speaker 9: do find myself doing things like that for stuff I
Speaker 9: would like.
Speaker 2: But yeah, wow, so you've been entrepreneurial for since a
Speaker 2: very young age.
Speaker 9: I have, I have recently, I hadself.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's what I was gonna ask, is what's you know,
Speaker 2: an entrepreneurial effort that you've found yourself in recently.
Speaker 9: So I do have a normal job. I work at
Speaker 9: a gas station. You know, that's fun and all what out,
Speaker 9: but it doesn't make that much money. So I have
Speaker 9: found that Craigslist is a very fun place to do
Speaker 9: dumb shit to earn money. Like the other day, I
Speaker 9: had sold this dude. I don't know what his interest
Speaker 9: was in these, but I sold this dude that I
Speaker 9: met on Craigslist just some fucking ear swabs, you know,
Speaker 9: like the little what are they called Q tips? I
Speaker 9: sold them some of us Q tips and I made
Speaker 9: about fifty dollars off of those, So I guess that
Speaker 9: would be a poor decision talking to somebody from Craigslist.
Speaker 9: But at the same time, I did profit from it.
Speaker 2: What do you think he was using bad.
Speaker 9: I don't know. I assume it was some sort of
Speaker 9: fetish thing for him. I don't really know. I haven't
Speaker 9: ventured into that kind of stuff. I have no fucking idea.
Speaker 2: What do you think, well, I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2: He could have put them in his own ear. Hot Dog,
Speaker 2: Hot Dog? Are you there? Hot dog? Are you gone?
Speaker 2: As mysteriously as she entered, she.
Speaker 4: Left pull from Dennis.
Speaker 2: Hello, Hello, who is this?
Speaker 5: Oh it's Dennis.
Speaker 2: Are you interesting? Dennis?
Speaker 5: Yeah? I wanted to elaborate about the Craigslist selling that
Speaker 5: the person before me was talking about.
Speaker 10: Oh please, that's like a whole back in the day,
Speaker 10: that was like a whole career move.
Speaker 5: That was like the only fans of message boards?
Speaker 2: Did you used to buy slash sell on that message board?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 3: Hell yeah?
Speaker 5: Selling stuff on Craigslist was the jam back in the day.
Speaker 2: What kinds of items would you sell? I?
Speaker 5: Uh, it depends, well, it depended. It was a lot
Speaker 5: of underwear, socks. Uh, I had some guy friends get
Speaker 5: in on the game, and then we would sell like
Speaker 5: jock straps and stuff. It's pretty amazing what people were
Speaker 5: willing to pay for.
Speaker 2: What did you observe as the highest ticket item?
Speaker 5: Well, so it really depended. It would be more like
Speaker 5: special requests versus like high ticket items. It would be like, uh,
Speaker 5: where a pair of where the same pair of underwear
Speaker 5: and exercise on a treadmill for X amount of time
Speaker 5: and then take the pair of underwear put it into
Speaker 5: one of those like the sealed air zip sealed things,
Speaker 5: you know, like you would do like a salmon or whatever.
Speaker 2: You don't talk about, right, and the vacuum seal it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we have vacu' to steal it, and then you
Speaker 5: send it to them.
Speaker 6: But then.
Speaker 5: Where the ahead the special request was where the real
Speaker 5: many came in.
Speaker 2: But how could they verify that you actually completed the request?
Speaker 5: I mean it's pretty easy to tell whether Well, first
Speaker 5: of all, they would get something in the mail, and
Speaker 5: then second of all, I think it's pretty easy to
Speaker 5: tell the difference between like a clean pair of underwear
Speaker 5: versus like exercised in for a week straight underwear.
Speaker 2: I'd like to I think It's funny to imagine that
Speaker 2: these guys like they can smell the difference between underwear
Speaker 2: that was used on a treadmill for ten minutes as
Speaker 2: opposed to twelve minutes.
Speaker 5: There were there were people that used to try and
Speaker 5: run a scam on on us because it was like
Speaker 5: a group of us that would do it. And the
Speaker 5: scam would be like, I want you to send me
Speaker 5: proofs that you actually wore x Y and Z while
Speaker 5: you did X Y and Z, so that in the
Speaker 5: hopes that they could get a picture of somebody like
Speaker 5: wearing the jockstrap or the sox or whatever. Uh, and
Speaker 5: that would be their way of, like, you know, then
Speaker 5: they would never if they if we sent them that
Speaker 5: that they would never call back or they would never
Speaker 5: buy anything. That was their way of trying to like
Speaker 5: scam picks and stuff.
Speaker 2: Well, so, Dennis, before before we move on, uh, you
Speaker 2: know you were calling me in as a follow up,
Speaker 2: Do you have any other idea as to what that earwax?
Speaker 2: I get the like I said, I understand the underwear
Speaker 2: and the jockstrap and the socks, but the Q tip
Speaker 2: doesn't make sense to me.
Speaker 5: I mean, it's again, it's just some weird fetish thing.
Speaker 5: Someone once paid me five hundred dollars to uh take
Speaker 5: a to record a video of me stepping on a
Speaker 5: printer in a high heel shoe and stomping on it
Speaker 5: until it broke, and then I mailed them the DVD
Speaker 5: with that on it a DVD.
Speaker 4: Yeah it was.
Speaker 5: It was a long time ago. And not only did
Speaker 5: he replace the printer, but he also paid me five
Speaker 5: hundred bucks.
Speaker 2: Oh so he also replaced the printer because it was
Speaker 2: your printer.
Speaker 8: Yeah, it was my personal printer.
Speaker 2: Was it a nice printer?
Speaker 5: Yeah, it was one of the ones that was the
Speaker 5: scanner printer combo.
Speaker 2: Well, thank you for sharing with us, Dennis. I appreciate
Speaker 2: you calling in. Yeah, of course, you have a good
Speaker 2: rest of the night.
Speaker 5: All right, talk to you later.
Speaker 1: All from and Let's go cute?
Speaker 2: Did you say let's go with Q?
Speaker 11: Yeah, that's a letter of like between A and Z,
Speaker 11: just shows a random one.
Speaker 2: You were. You were way more the last two people
Speaker 2: that picked up the phone they had they were like
Speaker 2: blown away that they got on And I like that
Speaker 2: you you you like answered me so immediately that you
Speaker 2: you were. That was a very confident you had like
Speaker 2: the heart of the cards there.
Speaker 11: Sleep So I am a good bluffer?
Speaker 7: You're what a good bluffing?
Speaker 6: Uh?
Speaker 2: Never mind, there's there's no there's no way to be
Speaker 2: good at this. This is not a job. There's no
Speaker 2: job to do, so you can't do a good job.
Speaker 2: But that also means you can't do a bad job.
Speaker 2: Are you interesting? Q? That's that's not a q an
Speaker 2: and thing? Is it?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 11: No, I just I completely forgot about that. Actually, I
Speaker 11: probably should have chose between one and twenty five of
Speaker 11: the letters.
Speaker 2: Are you interested in cute?
Speaker 7: I like to think so.
Speaker 11: I mean high school, I did kind of write a
Speaker 11: scooter between classes?
Speaker 2: You wrote a scool How old are you.
Speaker 11: Right now?
Speaker 2: On nineteen you wrote a scooter in between classes? Like
Speaker 2: you crazier scooter down the hallway of your high school
Speaker 2: from Spanish?
Speaker 11: Done that it wasn't in the school. Like my school
Speaker 11: had a very outdoorish campus. It's like it was built
Speaker 11: in the fifties, so instead of you know, making a
Speaker 11: new campus in like twenty twenty, they just kept building
Speaker 11: onto it. So like there's different buildings all outside and
Speaker 11: it's like a half mile wide campus, so it was
Speaker 11: hard to get around. But to like went into together
Speaker 11: within a five minutes.
Speaker 7: I believe it was.
Speaker 11: So I just kind of wrote scooter between classes and
Speaker 11: then got the admessiration on my side?
Speaker 2: Was this a thing? Was this or was it mainly?
Speaker 2: Were you the scooter guy? Or was everyone doing scooters?
Speaker 8: Your boy?
Speaker 2: Wow? So what do you mean by the administration was
Speaker 2: on your side? Was there a big war between scooter
Speaker 2: and no scooter?
Speaker 11: No? No, there might have been ever one against me
Speaker 11: and my friend.
Speaker 2: But what happened? Do you think it upset people that
Speaker 2: you wrote a scooter? Do you think that they thought
Speaker 2: you thought you were better than everyone else and that
Speaker 2: made them resent you.
Speaker 11: I don't think that. I didn't end up on school's
Speaker 11: Instagram mean page a couple of times. Mostly it's just
Speaker 11: people like, Hey, that's kind of cool or that's kind
Speaker 11: of funny.
Speaker 2: You know, there's a thing that happens when you in
Speaker 2: the culture of high school. Some kids become memes. You know,
Speaker 2: I kind of I kind of remember this. You know,
Speaker 2: we had a few kids that would would become memes, uh,
Speaker 2: and they get the there's kids in your school that
Speaker 2: sometimes when when you become memified, Q, I feel like
Speaker 2: it paints you. It turns you into like this two
Speaker 2: dimensional portrait of you are the scooter kid and that
Speaker 2: is all you are. Do you did you ever feel bad?
Speaker 2: Did you ever want people to know you as more
Speaker 2: than just the scooter kid? Q? Did you ever feel
Speaker 2: bad that that you were locked into that?
Speaker 11: I don't think I got locked into that. Well maybe
Speaker 11: me for like the freshmans that came in, but I
Speaker 11: only started doing that the second half high school. That's
Speaker 11: when I became troubled to like get the class on time.
Speaker 11: So I thought, hey, scooter, that could work. But I
Speaker 11: kind of know most of people in my grade because
Speaker 11: I was, like, I think it was like something in
Speaker 11: the top ten, so like I was known through extracurriculation
Speaker 11: other means to that. But I never really I mean,
Speaker 11: I got called the scooter boy everywhere, but I don't
Speaker 11: think I was locked to that per se. I think
Speaker 11: I did a good job doing other stuff to not
Speaker 11: just be the scooter boy.
Speaker 2: By the way, I want you to know, if I
Speaker 2: were on like the board or whatever, I totally would
Speaker 2: have voted against you being allowed to use a scooter
Speaker 2: because and here's why. The thing of I can't get
Speaker 2: the class on time, I need a scooter is just
Speaker 2: it's that's bullshit. Q. That's such bullshit. You realize why
Speaker 2: that you really you realize why that's bullshit, don't you?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 11: Yeah, no, I completely see.
Speaker 2: Because if you're the only because everyone else can do it,
Speaker 2: why is it that you? I mean, do you? I mean,
Speaker 2: do you have a disability? M Get the fuck out
Speaker 2: of here. No, well, you can't ride a scooter around.
Speaker 2: Everyone else can get to class on time out come,
Speaker 2: you can't come. You need the scooter.
Speaker 1: Against that.
Speaker 11: The original reason was, like you know, I said, my
Speaker 11: school kept building onto itself, okay, and my junior year
Speaker 11: they ran out of like space to build on. But
Speaker 11: there was this elementary school right next door, and thought
Speaker 11: we could just move all the elementary school kids to
Speaker 11: other schools and take over that building. And that's why
Speaker 11: it really became difficulty in the class because you had
Speaker 11: one on the opposite side of campus.
Speaker 2: That doesn't Yeah, but that doesn't address that doesn't address
Speaker 2: what I just said. It doesn't matter if everyone else
Speaker 2: was able to do it without the scooter except for you,
Speaker 2: So why should you get to ride a scooter?
Speaker 11: I think it was more so like the teacher's just
Speaker 11: think character late because they were getting there late like
Speaker 11: I was. It's more so like a point that there
Speaker 11: was no reason I started doing it.
Speaker 12: Was try to get the school to like do block.
Speaker 11: Scheduling instead of like seven periods that once to get
Speaker 11: more for it.
Speaker 2: Would if I would, if I would have fought really hard,
Speaker 2: like if I was like the one person in the
Speaker 2: room who voted against would have thought really hard for
Speaker 2: you to not be allowed to do that.
Speaker 11: But then they just said, you know what, rite the
Speaker 11: scooter and we both kind of want to.
Speaker 2: I would have thought to a point and then I
Speaker 2: would have given up. That's probably what happened.
Speaker 11: Yeah, yeah, well, thank you for sharing with us anytime.
Speaker 13: Then there was there was a.
Speaker 2: Whole who was the one person that was against it.
Speaker 11: There was one teacher that was like, it was this
Speaker 11: is my senior year and I was going over at
Speaker 11: the end of the school day. It was going over
Speaker 11: to like some club, but they apparently had the building
Speaker 11: on lockdown because there was like vandalism or something, and
Speaker 11: the teacher blocked me from going in and said, you
Speaker 11: can't write the scooter. On top of that, instead of
Speaker 11: insurance violation and all that, which I figured all that
Speaker 11: but also I was the kid that uh you know
Speaker 11: those rule books they make you read on the first day.
Speaker 2: Who was the teacher?
Speaker 11: Some Spanish teachers.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's all I need to know. Thank you for
Speaker 2: sharing Q. I appreciate you.
Speaker 1: You too all from Tiki.
Speaker 2: Tiki Hello, Hello Teeky.
Speaker 14: Oh my god, I actually got through.
Speaker 2: You don't know that this could be a voicemail. You
Speaker 2: could be in a dream. You don't know that you
Speaker 2: got through.
Speaker 3: A You could be right.
Speaker 14: I never thought of it like that.
Speaker 2: How old.
Speaker 14: I'm nineteen. I actually wanted to talk to you about
Speaker 14: that because all my like I recently graduated, and all
Speaker 14: my friends are like doing stuff with their life. But I'm,
Speaker 14: you know, still living with my grandma on her basement
Speaker 14: watching a deck in one stream.
Speaker 2: What do you want to be doing with your life?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 14: I don't know though. That's that's the actual thing, and
Speaker 14: that question I hated a lot while in high school,
Speaker 14: Like a lot of council counselors were like, what do
Speaker 14: you want to do with your life? And stuff? And
Speaker 14: I don't know. Even now, I don't know why graduated?
Speaker 2: Uh, you graduate from high school?
Speaker 1: Are you?
Speaker 2: Are you in college?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 14: I'm not well, some people. What do I do right now?
Speaker 14: I work at Taco Bell?
Speaker 4: I just.
Speaker 14: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2: Look work it. Look there's pride I'm working at Taco Bell.
Speaker 2: Don't think there's not, because I fucking love Taco Bell
Speaker 2: And if people didn't work there, I couldn't eat there.
Speaker 14: Thank you for actually saying that, because my friends make
Speaker 14: fun of me for working at Taco Bell.
Speaker 2: Fuck your friends. Fuck your friends. Do your fucking do
Speaker 2: your friends eat Taco Bell?
Speaker 15: They do?
Speaker 7: Actually fuck them?
Speaker 6: You know, I'm thinking about that.
Speaker 14: My friends are dickheads.
Speaker 2: That pisses me offten. You can't but to eat a
Speaker 2: Taco Bell. You need people to work there.
Speaker 14: You're right about that. And me working now at you know,
Speaker 14: dead make me appreciate other people who work there. Oh yeah,
Speaker 14: and it hurts me a little bit because I have
Speaker 14: my mom who's very rude to like like that. It's
Speaker 14: like you mess up an order or something like that.
Speaker 14: She's very rude to people like that, and I'll mess
Speaker 14: up in order sometimes when people are rude to me,
Speaker 14: it kind of hurts my feelings.
Speaker 2: Mmm. Have you tried to so it's given you? Yeah,
Speaker 2: I've heard that a lot, you know, from people who
Speaker 2: work in like the service industry, So it's given you
Speaker 2: a better perspective on you know, other people that you
Speaker 2: encounter as a civilian who work in that industry.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it does.
Speaker 14: Like I have a friend who is a waiter and
Speaker 14: a bus boy, and before you know, actually me talking
Speaker 14: to him, I didn't really tip that often or tip
Speaker 14: that much, But now I make sure I tip you
Speaker 14: know as much as I can because I understand you
Speaker 14: know what you're going through and what you need.
Speaker 2: Don't let don'ian let your friends give you shit for work,
Speaker 2: and I talk about, well, what did they I don't
Speaker 2: even I don't even want to hear what they do,
Speaker 2: because I don't think it's good to compare yourself to
Speaker 2: other people. We're we're talking about you right now, Nah, dude,
Speaker 2: I love talking man. Do you get a disc Do
Speaker 2: you eat the stuff or or after seeing how it's made,
Speaker 2: you're you're You're good.
Speaker 14: I used to like I'd say, for the first week,
Speaker 14: I eat a lot of taco bell, but I gradually
Speaker 14: stopped eating it as it's I think it kind of
Speaker 14: makes me pick a lot of it I eat and
Speaker 14: talk about every day.
Speaker 2: So do you have do you have aspirations. Uh, outside
Speaker 2: of talk about I know you hate this question. But
Speaker 2: when people when people uh put you in the corner
Speaker 2: and ask you to answer, what do you what do
Speaker 2: you usually come out.
Speaker 14: With I normally tell him like, my family kind of
Speaker 14: has this path laid out for me, but I guess
Speaker 14: in my rebellious state where I kind of don't want
Speaker 14: to take that path.
Speaker 6: But the path is.
Speaker 14: Like my uncle is a truck driver and he got
Speaker 14: a CDL and all that, and that's kind of the
Speaker 14: path they want me to take, is get my CDO
Speaker 14: and become a truck driver. But it's like, is that
Speaker 14: that's not my choice, that's the choice they're pushing on
Speaker 14: to me.
Speaker 2: Mhm. Sometimes sometimes uh not to say talk about a
Speaker 2: shitty choice, but like in general, sometimes a shitty choice
Speaker 2: is almost better than a because it's your A shitty
Speaker 2: choice that is yours is almost better than a good
Speaker 2: choice as someone else's.
Speaker 14: Yeah, yeah, you could be right about that because I'm
Speaker 14: I am just you know, like I kind of got
Speaker 14: to say it, like I only work and talk about
Speaker 14: I live with my grandma. I don't got to pay
Speaker 14: rent and all that she provides for me.
Speaker 2: So it's like all, if you're not paying rent, that's
Speaker 2: good because you can say you save up all that money,
Speaker 2: you can use it for you know, lots of difference
Speaker 2: than you know, investments and shiit m h.
Speaker 14: I've been wanting to get in more of the stock market.
Speaker 14: I haven't seen a lot of that.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, well we're gonna get way off topic if
Speaker 2: we start talking about this. But is there do you
Speaker 2: have any do you have any interests outside?
Speaker 4: Like what do you do?
Speaker 2: Like, what do you do when you're not working at
Speaker 2: Taco Bell?
Speaker 14: I'm not working. I'm really in the anime. But like
Speaker 14: I was talking to my friends about like our personalities
Speaker 14: and stuff, and then they kind of mentioned, like, I,
Speaker 14: you know, how I really talk about is anime and
Speaker 14: video games, and I was like, you're right. So I
Speaker 14: wanted to right now, I'm magic or like magic magic
Speaker 14: magic magic magic, like tricks like card tricks and ship
Speaker 14: like that sick. You know, I think it's entertaining and
Speaker 14: I don't know any Like I had this one friend
Speaker 14: back in middle school where he, you know, did a
Speaker 14: lot of card tricks and I thought it was cool.
Speaker 14: But like I realized, as I get older, my friend
Speaker 14: group diminishes. Like drastically, Like, right now I only talk
Speaker 14: to the same four people.
Speaker 2: Well, four people is incredible, by the way, I I
Speaker 2: probably talked to like four people. Four people is good.
Speaker 2: Well wait, are these the same four people? Because your
Speaker 2: friends earlier they were making fun of you for we're
Speaker 2: going to talk about it, sounds like they sucked.
Speaker 14: They Yeah, it is the same four people. But I
Speaker 14: don't see it as that because it's like, that's kind
Speaker 14: of how our friend group operates, with like dickheads to
Speaker 14: each other. You know, sometimes it does hurt me emotionally,
Speaker 14: and I will convey that to them and they do
Speaker 14: understand sometimes, but other times they'll be like, oh, you're
Speaker 14: just being a pussy, You're just emotional and so on
Speaker 14: and so forth.
Speaker 2: Well, I I all right, Initially I didn't want to
Speaker 2: talk about your friends, and I'll talk about them real
Speaker 2: quick before we move on.
Speaker 12: But like.
Speaker 2: Because because like maybe if you like are like jealous
Speaker 2: of certain things that your friends are doing, that could
Speaker 2: indict that will at least queue you in onto what
Speaker 2: you might want. If that may like, what is it
Speaker 2: that your friends are doing that you are like, Oh,
Speaker 2: they're moving on with their lives and doing cool stuff. Like,
Speaker 2: what what is it that they're doing that you you know,
Speaker 2: but one of them, I'm sorry you said that one
Speaker 2: more time, you kind of get cut out a little bit.
Speaker 5: Oh sorry.
Speaker 14: Most of them are going into the army, and you know,
Speaker 14: they offered me to go with them. But that's also
Speaker 14: not something I want to do. That's not something I
Speaker 14: aspired to do.
Speaker 2: So why are you so? I mean, why would you
Speaker 2: be Why would you be jealous of someone doing something
Speaker 2: that you don't want to do.
Speaker 14: I wouldn't say I'm jealous, Like I don't think I
Speaker 14: am jealous.
Speaker 6: The thing is just like.
Speaker 14: They know what they want to do, like they they
Speaker 14: you know, they want to do that. I don't know
Speaker 14: what I want to do. So it's the fact that they,
Speaker 14: you know, they have a purpose kind of I would
Speaker 14: say a purpose in life, and I don't know.
Speaker 1: What mine is.
Speaker 2: Well, I'll say a couple of things. And I'm not
Speaker 2: qualified to give advice because I'm a lizard on the computer.
Speaker 2: But I don't know. You're you're so fucking young too,
Speaker 2: like nineteen dude, honestly, like honest to shit, like you
Speaker 2: living at your grandma's house and like work at a time,
Speaker 2: just like at nineteen, Like, do that as long, honest honestly,
Speaker 2: do that as long as you can. I think so, right,
Speaker 2: because if you let's say you lived at your mom's
Speaker 2: house for like, and people might disagree with me on this,
Speaker 2: but if you just lived at your your grandma's house
Speaker 2: for you know, a couple of years, and you just
Speaker 2: you just eight taco bell and ham sandwiches and ship,
Speaker 2: you just saved up all that money you can, You're
Speaker 2: gonna build a cute You're gonna build a very cute
Speaker 2: little savings account right there, and then you know, and
Speaker 2: then you can use that to invest in stocks and ship.
Speaker 2: Like that's kind of the moves. Like people might shoot
Speaker 2: on you for that, but like, dude, building building up
Speaker 2: a cute little savings account while you know, keeping your
Speaker 2: grandma come and feeding some stoners, that's not a bad gig.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't take any shame in that.
Speaker 4: You.
Speaker 15: Yeah, you're that.
Speaker 14: I do appreciate your input with that, because I don't
Speaker 14: thought of.
Speaker 4: It like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I keep thinking about it like that. You're you're
Speaker 2: saying you're saving up, you're feeding people, you're taking care
Speaker 2: of you gras, It's it's a you got it for
Speaker 2: nineteen that's a good I think that's a good gig.
Speaker 14: Yeah, you know, like the thing is too, like, uh,
Speaker 14: I have a younger brother. I get compared to a lot,
Speaker 14: and he's kind of like the prodigy of the family.
Speaker 14: Like he's super smart. He does all this coding and
Speaker 14: you know, cyber security stuff like that, and I get
Speaker 14: compared to him, and like they believe he's going places,
Speaker 14: and then I'm just the deadbeat of the family and
Speaker 14: that kind of hurts me.
Speaker 15: I know.
Speaker 2: I like, I liked what you said that you were
Speaker 2: like kind of getting into stocks, right, yeah, yeah, get
Speaker 2: more into get like get into the chick, give us
Speaker 2: like investments and ship. That's what I That's what I
Speaker 2: would do if I was in your situations, I would
Speaker 2: like pocket all that keep loving with your grandma. Pocket
Speaker 2: all that money, and then look at how you can
Speaker 2: invest it. I mean, don't like, you know, go to
Speaker 2: the casinos or put all on fucking game stop or something.
Speaker 2: But I like that's a good I think that's a
Speaker 2: good strategy. Just saving up money to invest, you'll you'll
Speaker 2: be ahead. Especially in nineteen dude, you're actually in I
Speaker 2: know you think you're in a shitty position. But at nineteen,
Speaker 2: you're wealthy in time and you're saving up your money.
Speaker 2: You could you could really do some shit. Don't don't.
Speaker 2: Don't think of yourself as I mean, fucking at nineteen.
Speaker 2: You know what I mean. I think have some have
Speaker 2: some faith that you're doing a good thing.
Speaker 15: Thank you for that.
Speaker 14: Yeah, I actually really need to hear that. I have
Speaker 14: a lot of like, uh, I guess haters, but it's like,
Speaker 14: you know, I want to know if it's haters, because
Speaker 14: like they are looking out for my best interest. But
Speaker 14: the way they're going about it.
Speaker 1: You know, I want to think it is the best way.
Speaker 2: Would you say your.
Speaker 14: Name was Tiky like a teaky torch.
Speaker 2: Well, thank you, thank you for sharing Tiki. And yeah, dude,
Speaker 2: keep keep keep saying. I like that, I like, I like,
Speaker 2: I like I like the gig, saving up the taco
Speaker 2: money with the hopes of investing. That's what That's what
Speaker 2: I fucking do. I like. I don't want to shut
Speaker 2: up about this. But live with your grandma, Be cool
Speaker 2: to her, take care of her, have a good relationship
Speaker 2: with her, because you know, uh, you know, keep working
Speaker 2: at Taco Bell, keep going fucking you. Watch every YouTube
Speaker 2: video about investing in ship. I swear to God it
Speaker 2: in nineteen you'll you'll, you're setting yourself up good, So
Speaker 2: don't don't forget about it, all right?
Speaker 15: Man?
Speaker 2: Thank you, thank you for talking in man uh. Best
Speaker 2: of luck to you, Kiki, thank you. I know that
Speaker 2: was long, but I'm passionate about those things, all.
Speaker 4: From the idea to accept press one.
Speaker 2: Hello, Hello, hi, can you can you? Can you turn
Speaker 2: off your stream?
Speaker 14: Oh?
Speaker 8: Wait, yes I can wait.
Speaker 2: Hi, okay, hello, turn off? Turn off? Are you on
Speaker 2: the computer right now?
Speaker 7: Yes?
Speaker 8: Okay.
Speaker 2: Nothing good happens from being on the computer. Turn off
Speaker 2: the computer.
Speaker 16: There we go.
Speaker 8: That was very confusing for a moment. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: I forgive you.
Speaker 8: Excellent. How are you tonight? Therap, you gotta go.
Speaker 2: I'm okay, I'm all right. I'm hanging in there. I'm
Speaker 2: doing the best I can.
Speaker 8: Are you okay?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm good. I've I've learned, you know what, something
Speaker 2: bad has happened to me. This is a night.
Speaker 8: What happened?
Speaker 2: I've learned that it's a lot more fun to to
Speaker 2: be mean than to be nice. And I think I'm
Speaker 2: gonna sart. I think I'm gonna start getting addicted to that,
Speaker 2: and I'm gonna and I'm gonna take it too far
Speaker 2: at some point and it's going to backfire on me.
Speaker 8: It's okay, you won't hurt my feelings.
Speaker 2: But I don't want to be mean. You haven't given
Speaker 2: me a reason to want to be mean to you.
Speaker 8: Oh okay, excellent, we'll ask me some questions.
Speaker 2: I don't reian it. I'm not trying to actually mad.
Speaker 2: It's this look, this is it's all a bit. It's
Speaker 2: I'm doing a thing here. I'm not actually none of
Speaker 2: these emotions, None of these emotions, they're all for theater.
Speaker 8: We've been new, we've been knew.
Speaker 2: Just just you know.
Speaker 8: I'll try and give you a reason to hate me.
Speaker 2: Don't do I I don't. I'm not, I'm not. I'm
Speaker 2: not looking for it. What's your name?
Speaker 8: My name is Lauren?
Speaker 2: Lauren? Have you Lauren? Are you interesting?
Speaker 8: I'm as interesting as any of these people on here.
Speaker 2: I guess, okay, well, what's what's your what? What? What
Speaker 2: would you say is your qualification in your own terms,
Speaker 2: in your own words.
Speaker 8: For being in I don't know. I sell paint for
Speaker 8: a living.
Speaker 2: You used to or you do?
Speaker 8: No, I currently sell paint for a living.
Speaker 2: Did you say you paint or you sell paint? I
Speaker 2: sell paint, okay, I like it like Sherman Williams or something.
Speaker 8: Actually, I did work at as Sherwin Williams. I don't
Speaker 8: work at a sharm Williams anymore. I currently work at
Speaker 8: the Blue Hardware Store, but I did work at a
Speaker 8: Sherwood Williams for a time.
Speaker 2: You work at the Blue Hardware store? Yeah, the blue
Speaker 2: one and the orange one. Oh, the Lowe's in the
Speaker 2: home depot.
Speaker 8: Yes, there we go.
Speaker 2: I'm not supposed I'm not supposed to say that until unless.
Speaker 17: Of they.
Speaker 5: So I don't get fired.
Speaker 2: What do you find interesting about selling paint?
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 8: It's kind of an unusual career choice. I'm a young woman,
Speaker 8: so that's kind of fun. I love striking fear into
Speaker 8: the hearts of old men whenever I left five, because
Speaker 8: they think it's gonna like break me in half or something.
Speaker 8: So that's fun. I'm TikTok videos. A lot of people
Speaker 8: find that fascinating.
Speaker 2: There's a lot of you make you make TikTok videos,
Speaker 2: like I do? I know there's one. I know there's
Speaker 2: one kid who like was sponsored by Sherman William or
Speaker 2: or something like that, for like his like amazing paint.
Speaker 2: I know there's a there's a whole paint niche or
Speaker 2: something like that.
Speaker 8: Oh yeah, no, there's a thing. It's it's it's called
Speaker 8: paint Talk. I participate in that sometimes.
Speaker 2: So you say you like to strike fear in the
Speaker 2: hearts of old men.
Speaker 5: I do.
Speaker 2: And how how do you? How do you strike that fear?
Speaker 8: Honestly just by doing my fucking job and by knowing
Speaker 8: what I'm talking about out because they don't expect me
Speaker 8: to know that because I have a uterus.
Speaker 2: So is that is that? Is that frustrating for you? Yeah?
Speaker 8: I mean it can be. I mean, like, I'm not
Speaker 8: going to sit here and act like I know what
Speaker 8: I'm fucking talking about. I do kind of, but you know,
Speaker 8: not really, So yeah, I don't know. It can be frustrating,
Speaker 8: but I expect it.
Speaker 4: Well.
Speaker 2: I mean, you look, you don't need to know everything
Speaker 2: about paint. You just need to know more about paint
Speaker 2: than someone who doesn't know anything about paint.
Speaker 10: Yes, and most people know absolutely nothing, perfect, absolutely nothing,
Speaker 10: And it's very frustrating because they do absolutely no research
Speaker 10: whatsoever and then get very upset.
Speaker 8: Whenever I try to tell them what's going on, they.
Speaker 2: Get well, why do they get upset when you try
Speaker 2: to tell them what's going on? That's what That's what
Speaker 2: I would. I would. If I'm going to talk to
Speaker 2: the paint person, I want them to explain everything to
Speaker 2: me about pint because I don't know anything.
Speaker 8: No, they do, but some people, I don't know, they
Speaker 8: have like an ego about it. And then I go, hey, paint,
Speaker 8: maybe don't paint your bathroom with flat paint, and they're like,
Speaker 8: well why not? And they see, you know, it's it's
Speaker 8: a whole thing.
Speaker 2: See, I would ask you that question genuinely, genuinely, why
Speaker 2: not paint it with flat paint? I didn't know that
Speaker 2: was a thing.
Speaker 8: Genuinely, don't paint your bathroom flat paint. Honestly, don't use
Speaker 8: flat paint for anything but the ceiling. Really, it's not
Speaker 8: very washable. I don't know if you've ever lived, like
Speaker 8: you know, in my shitty apartment, all of the walls
Speaker 8: are flat paint, so if you need to wash them down, impossible.
Speaker 8: It's also not very moisture resistant at all. So for
Speaker 8: a bathroom, i'd recommend a satin or a semi gloss
Speaker 8: to see you.
Speaker 2: You have convinced me that you know everything about paint.
Speaker 2: You know more than you need to know about paint
Speaker 2: or I mean, it sounds like you know exactly as
Speaker 2: much as you need to know about paint.
Speaker 8: Yeah, it's kind of upsetting because I'm also a twenty
Speaker 8: year old woman.
Speaker 2: What's wrong with that? You have a skill, you have
Speaker 2: specialized paint knowledge, but it doesn't matter that the who
Speaker 2: are old you are or what's going on in your pants?
Speaker 2: Yeah it is.
Speaker 8: It's kind of a very niche thing to know a lot.
Speaker 2: About Well, you know enough about it to do it,
Speaker 2: and I do be doing it.
Speaker 8: I just don't all we do be doing it?
Speaker 2: Would you say your name was Lauren? Well, Lauren, look,
Speaker 2: I commend you for your paint knowledge. I wish you
Speaker 2: the best of luck moving forward, and thank you for educating.
Speaker 2: You probably actually saved someone listening to this is gonna
Speaker 2: not paint their bathroom with flat paint because of you,
Speaker 2: So you save that person's life.
Speaker 8: I'm so glad that I did.
Speaker 4: Well.
Speaker 2: Thank you, Lauren. You have a good rest to that.
Speaker 5: Thank you so much.
Speaker 8: Have a lovely night as well.
Speaker 2: Paul from Keith with two e's, like one in the
Speaker 2: one as the second letter and then one at the end.
Speaker 15: Uh for my name, it's Keith the K E E
Speaker 15: t H. Yeah, Well thank you for that, like a
Speaker 15: great start? Yeah like teeth? Yeah, I got a guy
Speaker 15: who calls me doctor Keeth?
Speaker 2: Well, how did you how did you expect this to
Speaker 2: how did you want this to go?
Speaker 15: Usually it starts off with somebody saying, oh, I've never
Speaker 15: seen it done like that before, but uh.
Speaker 2: I met this interaction because you were upset that I
Speaker 2: didn't like your name, and then you said, well that's
Speaker 2: you sarcastically said that's a great way for this to
Speaker 2: start off. And I'm asking with all like not as
Speaker 2: like a how did you expect this to go? Back?
Speaker 2: And then you know it's quite seriously, you know, how did.
Speaker 15: You go on a serious note? Honestly, I was still
Speaker 15: I was expecting to hear your voicemail saying that the
Speaker 15: lines were busy. I wasn't expecting to go right into this,
Speaker 15: So for that I apologize on you know, I apologize.
Speaker 2: For that Keith with twee's. You never have to apologize
Speaker 2: to me for anything ever. But that also means I
Speaker 2: don't have to apologize to you for anything ever, including
Speaker 2: making fun of your name.
Speaker 15: That's fair.
Speaker 2: Are you interested?
Speaker 15: I would like to think so, But I would also
Speaker 15: like to ask you a question, if I may.
Speaker 2: Sure.
Speaker 15: Do you think that interesting people are born out of trauma?
Speaker 2: You know? I'm not. I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I'm not
Speaker 2: interested in taking the stance of romanticizing trauma as making
Speaker 2: one into an interesting person. I don't think that anyone
Speaker 2: should feel like they have to experience trauma to become interesting.
Speaker 15: It's kind of like a six to one hand and
Speaker 15: half a dozen of any other, right, because you don't
Speaker 15: have to go through trauma to be interesting. But I
Speaker 15: feel like people who are interesting, I find a lot
Speaker 15: of the time have some sort of trauma.
Speaker 2: What makes you say that?
Speaker 15: Well, possibly because where I grew up from, not everybody
Speaker 15: tend everybody that I used to hang out with tend
Speaker 15: to have some shitty backstory, right, you know, and including myself,
Speaker 15: And this isn't a sob story in myself. Honestly. What
Speaker 15: I'm trying to get at is the reason why I
Speaker 15: think I'm interesting is because I've been able to overcome
Speaker 15: that kind of dark cloud or at least, I like
Speaker 15: to think that at this point in my life, I've
Speaker 15: taken a step out of the cloud and I've acknowledged it.
Speaker 15: I for instance, ever since I left high school, I
Speaker 15: joined a Irish pipe and drum Irish pipe and you know,
Speaker 15: drum band. I moved to the closest city where I'm at,
Speaker 15: and I found myself a job selling cheese.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 15: And I also, you know, got a degree in information
Speaker 15: science and technology, all of which was stemmed from this
Speaker 15: feeling of not feeling significant and uh, you know, not
Speaker 15: honestly knowing what I was doing with my life until
Speaker 15: my like last year of college, all of a sudden
Speaker 15: I had, you know, I had so many things going
Speaker 15: on at once that I finally like broke in a
Speaker 15: way where I that self, you know, self doubt and
Speaker 15: everything kind of how to be pushed aside, you know.
Speaker 15: And I feel like being reborn in a way through
Speaker 15: that kind of crucible of like of of trauma, finally
Speaker 15: coming to a point where you you overcome it to
Speaker 15: get what you have to get done. I think that
Speaker 15: has made me an interesting person.
Speaker 2: I'm not a real therapist, and I'm not here to
Speaker 2: do armchair therapy, but I do have a thought that
Speaker 2: I might be I'm not. I'm not trying to psychoanalyze
Speaker 2: or anything, but I mean the idea, like you've done
Speaker 2: all these things, like you know, you got your computer
Speaker 2: science degree, you turned your life around. It sounds to me,
Speaker 2: but that's you. Don't You don't have trauma to thank
Speaker 2: for that.
Speaker 3: You have.
Speaker 2: You trauma didn't fucking do that. You did that, you
Speaker 2: made your life interesting. You know. I think I think
Speaker 2: the fact that like again I'm not a real person, uh,
Speaker 2: but I think the fact that, like you know, you
Speaker 2: did all the you you did that fucking your past
Speaker 2: being shitty. Didn't you create your present being good? You
Speaker 2: created your present being good. I think you should you
Speaker 2: should take and I think you should take credit for it.
Speaker 2: Oh you know what I mean. Don't give your credit
Speaker 2: to the shitty things that happened to you. Give the
Speaker 2: credit to you.
Speaker 15: I would say it was more like it was more
Speaker 15: like weighted clothes. They didn't. I'm not saying that the
Speaker 15: trauma put me in the situation. And I have to
Speaker 15: agree with you. And this is like the first time
Speaker 15: in my life where I can take the credit, you know,
Speaker 15: like I finally have stepped away from this being like
Speaker 15: everybody being like, oh, you should be proud of yourself
Speaker 15: from doing that, and me not feeling like I did enough,
Speaker 15: you know, because I was always my problem growing up
Speaker 15: and you know, uh, passing high school and everything like that,
Speaker 15: it was like I didn't feel like an accomplishment, but
Speaker 15: like you know, moving to an entire new city and
Speaker 15: finishing my degree when I was flip flopping majors left
Speaker 15: and right and finally settling in on something and getting
Speaker 15: through it while working full time, going to school full
Speaker 15: time and everything like that, that was the deed that
Speaker 15: really pushed me to become who I am today. Like
Speaker 15: nothing else fucking touched it than that, and that was
Speaker 15: what made me who I am. The trauma and everything.
Speaker 15: I'm sorry you finished, Yeah, the trauma and everything. Sure,
Speaker 15: it's you know, you aren't who you are you know
Speaker 15: because of it, Like the past is the stepping stones
Speaker 15: for the steps that you take, you know, in the future.
Speaker 15: But but they don't you know, obviously they don't define you,
Speaker 15: but they define a core, putent bit of you. And
Speaker 15: it takes, you know, like I said before, going through
Speaker 15: kind of like a crucible.
Speaker 2: I still and for the fifth time, I'm not a
Speaker 2: real anything, but you know, I still I still like
Speaker 2: I I'm still iffy on the idea of like, you know,
Speaker 2: in any way like romanticizing your the you know, your
Speaker 2: your crappy past in any way, shape or form. I mean,
Speaker 2: I get, I guess, I guess I understand you, and
Speaker 2: you should be, you know, proud of yourself for having
Speaker 2: overcame what you overcome. But I don't think it's I
Speaker 2: don't know if it's good to walk around, you know,
Speaker 2: thinking that you are who you like, having, you know,
Speaker 2: being defined by the past. It doesn't sound like you are.
Speaker 2: But you know I wouldn't. I wouldn't walk around being
Speaker 2: like everything that's bad. What's happened to me made me
Speaker 2: who I am. You know, you you made you who
Speaker 2: you are. Just to reiterate, you.
Speaker 15: Know, I will have to probably take that at different
Speaker 15: perspective and in consideration, you know, would.
Speaker 2: Would you say your name was Keith for two years? Well, Keith.
Speaker 2: I'm not going to take back what I said about
Speaker 2: your name, because I still think that's a weird way
Speaker 2: to spell your name. But I appreciate you sharing what
Speaker 2: you shared with us this evening.
Speaker 15: Thank you man, Thank you for having me.
Speaker 2: You have a good rest of the good.
Speaker 15: One as well.
Speaker 4: All from Kayla Martin.
Speaker 2: Hello, Hi, what's what do you say? Your name was?
Speaker 17: Kayla Martin, Cayla?
Speaker 2: What year were you born?
Speaker 6: Nineteen ninety four?
Speaker 2: Nineteen ninety four. That was a great year.
Speaker 6: It was a good year.
Speaker 2: I think. So you didn't say thank you.
Speaker 6: Thank well, thanks, I wasn't expecting you to pick up.
Speaker 2: I have a question for you.
Speaker 1: Okay, why.
Speaker 6: Why did I call? I don't know, just to have
Speaker 6: somebody to listen.
Speaker 3: I guess.
Speaker 2: Somebody to listen.
Speaker 6: Yeah, hm, I don't. I feel like I share with
Speaker 6: people very easy. But I think I called because, like
Speaker 6: I don't know you, so it makes it a little easier.
Speaker 2: Maybe what Well, you know, what is it that you
Speaker 2: wanted to share? If anything? In particular, I'm.
Speaker 6: Having a hard time with a few things. I was
Speaker 6: on your TikTok live and I said I was raised
Speaker 6: in a cult.
Speaker 2: That raised in a cult. Well, I have to tell
Speaker 2: you two things. First of all, I'm not a real therapist.
Speaker 2: I forget what the second thing is. But okay, what
Speaker 2: are you having a hard time with.
Speaker 6: So recently? I mean like it's been seven years since
Speaker 6: I left, so the triggers from that have kind of subsided.
Speaker 6: But I read a book recently that kind of opened
Speaker 6: my eyes to how dysfunctional my family was just in general.
Speaker 6: Like I kind of always blamed the call for how
Speaker 6: crappy they were, but it wasn't just that, Like they
Speaker 6: were just dysfunctional on their own.
Speaker 2: How long have you been out of the cult?
Speaker 3: I left in.
Speaker 6: Twenty fourteen, so about seven years, and I think.
Speaker 2: August and what are you What are you doing now?
Speaker 6: Now? I'm not doing anything any work because of COVID.
Speaker 6: I wasn't a sash therapist. But I'm a housewife right
Speaker 6: now and I like it a lot.
Speaker 2: Actually a housewife. Do you do you have kids too?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: No, just a housewife to my husband, What do you
Speaker 2: like about being a housewife?
Speaker 6: I like taking care of people because that's what I
Speaker 6: did a lot as a kid, I think, so it
Speaker 6: kind of transferred. So I like like getting the house
Speaker 6: clean and making him dinner. He works really hard and
Speaker 6: I'm really proud of him. He's a manager at a
Speaker 6: car wash.
Speaker 2: How did you to meet.
Speaker 6: Through friends? They were in the religion too, but they
Speaker 6: weren't like super strong in it, and so they had
Speaker 6: a quote worldly friends, and he was one of those
Speaker 6: like worldly boys, and I wasn't supposed to talk to him,
Speaker 6: but I couldn't help myself.
Speaker 2: So okay, so they so so this cult, they referred
Speaker 2: to people outside of the cult as worldly.
Speaker 1: Yes.
Speaker 2: Interesting, so you weren't started talking You started talking to
Speaker 2: this person while you weren't allowed to.
Speaker 7: Yes, And what was that?
Speaker 6: Like?
Speaker 2: How did you we were talking to him online? Were
Speaker 2: you doing the secret little Romeo and Juliet Balcony meetups?
Speaker 6: No, because they were friends of mine and he was
Speaker 6: because I was friends with the daughter and he was
Speaker 6: friends with the son. So we would just like be
Speaker 6: at the house at the same time and for a
Speaker 6: long time.
Speaker 9: And we were just like friends.
Speaker 6: We would just hang out a lot. And then like
Speaker 6: it started to develop a little bit more.
Speaker 2: Hm, were did you did you have a hard time
Speaker 2: hiding this from people who would be upset if you
Speaker 2: found out.
Speaker 6: Yes, it was hard because we're not supposed to have
Speaker 6: sex before marriage in the religion. So when I wanted
Speaker 6: to go on birth control, I had to kind of
Speaker 6: come up with an excuse with my mom of like, oh,
Speaker 6: my cycles just like really irregular, So I need to
Speaker 6: go see a doctor and talk about it. And then obviously,
Speaker 6: once I was with a doctor by myself, I was
Speaker 6: just like, hey, let me get back. So yeah, there
Speaker 6: was definitely times I had to be sneaky, but obviously
Speaker 6: I got caught.
Speaker 2: Eventually you got caught, Yeah, yes, what happened? What was
Speaker 2: the aftermath of getting caught?
Speaker 6: I they have they call them judicial committees where you
Speaker 6: meet with the elders of the congregation, and I kind
Speaker 6: of lied at the first one and was like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 6: we're not talking. And those judicial committee meetings are like
Speaker 6: really they take it too far because they're like, oh,
Speaker 6: I don't know what I'm allowed to say, so like
Speaker 6: any words are off, like like like right now on here?
Speaker 15: Yeah, like.
Speaker 6: Okay, well they would ask two they would get like
Speaker 6: too personal. They would be like, oh did you orgasm?
Speaker 6: Like how many times did you orgasm? Like how often
Speaker 6: would you have sex? And like just they they got
Speaker 6: really into it. So I lied and they believed me,
Speaker 6: and then I got caught a second time, had another
Speaker 6: like judicial committee meeting, and that one I decided I
Speaker 6: was gonna leave and I was moving. I moved in
Speaker 6: with him and not married to him, so it all
Speaker 6: turned out for the better.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, you must be relieved that you don't have
Speaker 2: to fucking do you know, tell a creepy old guy
Speaker 2: how many orgasms you had?
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, that's that's a big release, And it was
Speaker 6: it was really hard because once I because I left
Speaker 6: for him, and I knew when I left that I
Speaker 6: would lose like all my childhood friends. And because I
Speaker 6: got to Fellowship, so I was shunned by everybody. So
Speaker 6: nobody's allowed to talk to me or anything. And I
Speaker 6: knew that, and that was fine, but it was strange
Speaker 6: to slowly come to the realization that the religion I
Speaker 6: was born and raised and believed in like so deeply.
Speaker 7: Is just so wrong.
Speaker 2: Do you know, anyone who won't be friends with you
Speaker 2: because the sky tells them not to is probably not
Speaker 2: even someone that you would really benefit from being friends with.
Speaker 6: Ryan, Yeah, no, yeah, you come to that realization too,
Speaker 6: that like those people were never really your friends.
Speaker 2: Well what'd you say?
Speaker 7: Your name was, Kayla?
Speaker 2: Well, Kayla, thank you for sharing that with us. I'm
Speaker 2: glad that everything turned out pretty well for you.
Speaker 6: Thanks, thank you for listening.
Speaker 2: Of course, you have a good rest of the night.
Speaker 6: You too, Ye.
Speaker 4: All, from Vivian.
Speaker 2: Vivian, Vivian, are you there?
Speaker 4: Hi?
Speaker 2: Yeah there? Have you ever played a game called Paper
Speaker 2: Mario in the thousand Year Door?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 16: No, not at all.
Speaker 2: No, Vivian, How old are you?
Speaker 16: I'm twenty one. I'm going to be twenty one two days.
Speaker 2: Oh, happy birthday.
Speaker 4: Thank you.
Speaker 2: There's i'll I want, there's there's a fuck all right,
Speaker 2: there's a character in that video game that has the
Speaker 2: name Vivian, and I thought of it. What are you
Speaker 2: excited to turn twenty one?
Speaker 16: Half and half? I mean, it's kind of it's kind
Speaker 16: of melodramatic in a sense because everyone always makes it
Speaker 16: up to be this big deal, you know, and anytime
Speaker 16: that people want to try to celebrate my birthday, you know,
Speaker 16: before I've turned twenty one, obviously, everyone always tries to
Speaker 16: go out to a bar or whatever, knowing fully well
Speaker 16: that I can't drink. So it's it's, you know, it's
Speaker 16: it's difficult to keep friends in a sense because of that,
Speaker 16: you know what I mean, and social media as well
Speaker 16: as like Facebook and Snapchat mentioning that it's the person's birthday,
Speaker 16: So it's like hard to weed out.
Speaker 2: Who, you know what I mean, do you feel are
Speaker 2: you Are you a birthday person? Do you like your
Speaker 2: birth right? Because because there's I think there's a spectrum
Speaker 2: of like some people are like, it's my goddamn birth week.
Speaker 2: We're doing We're going all out, we're doing this, we're
Speaker 2: doing that. Then some people, I mean, they're almost antie
Speaker 2: their own birthday. They don't want anything, they don't want
Speaker 2: the singing, don't talk to me, don't write on my
Speaker 2: Facebook wall. Where do you fall on that? On that spectrum?
Speaker 5: Well, I don't know.
Speaker 16: I personally it's it's it's I've grown to not really
Speaker 16: celebrate it because you know, people always make it out
Speaker 16: to be a big deal, and I feel it's a
Speaker 16: little bit too egotistical for my liking.
Speaker 2: Oh, on one, can you guys hear Vivian? I'm so sorry.
Speaker 2: I'm always nervous if people.
Speaker 16: Can't hear the all right, If you want me to
Speaker 16: come closer to the mic, I definitely can.
Speaker 2: Oh if you could, that would be hello? Hi? Did
Speaker 2: you know VIVI? And I have a question for you?
Speaker 16: Sure still.
Speaker 15: Why why why?
Speaker 16: Because it's given me enough grief in my lifetime, and
Speaker 16: I say, why not wig while you still have the
Speaker 16: opportunity and free will to why not rather? I know
Speaker 16: that kind of almost bounces back on previous you know,
Speaker 16: conversations had in this stream tonight.
Speaker 2: But you know, what is your why not?
Speaker 15: What is that?
Speaker 2: What is your thing that you're going to do? Because
Speaker 2: why not.
Speaker 16: Pursue this career that I wanted to, you know, acting
Speaker 16: and business and a bunch of different things. I'm having
Speaker 16: difficulty deciding a lot of things right now and pinpointing
Speaker 16: that as well as like my birthday very soon. It's
Speaker 16: it's hard to be able to go out with you know,
Speaker 16: pandemic and everything that's going on right now. You know Panorama.
Speaker 2: All right, so you well hold on real hold, we'll
Speaker 2: stop real quick.
Speaker 6: All right.
Speaker 2: You said a career, yes is it? And you then
Speaker 2: you you said you said a career, and then you
Speaker 2: named like ten things?
Speaker 4: Is there?
Speaker 2: Is it a particular thing that you're going after?
Speaker 16: Acting? But then I also wanted to have a backup.
Speaker 16: I'm currently pursuing my my bachelor's in business, you know,
Speaker 16: for marketing, and then I'm also looking at ux design,
Speaker 16: which is it designs the interface for apps and websites
Speaker 16: for different companies and whatnot. So i'd like to say
Speaker 16: I'm well rounded. I was always brought up to be
Speaker 16: well rounded and well spoken, so.
Speaker 3: You know, just.
Speaker 16: Trying to, you know, find where I belong right now.
Speaker 9: It's difficult, you.
Speaker 2: Know, Uh I talk. I talk about this constantly because
Speaker 2: it's been such a fucking game changer for me. Vivian.
Speaker 2: Do you use TikTok?
Speaker 15: Yes?
Speaker 2: I do. Do you make tiktoks?
Speaker 3: I used to.
Speaker 16: They're kind of funny, but I don't know.
Speaker 2: I just because if you're trying to get into that,
Speaker 2: like that's if I if I wanted to go be
Speaker 2: an actor, that's a number one thing I would do
Speaker 2: is just make a bunch of tiktoks. I feel like
Speaker 2: that's how like everyone's getting like famous now is through TikTok,
Speaker 2: And like, you know, there's so much, there's so much
Speaker 2: you can do on there with that endvo business too,
Speaker 2: you know. Oh yeah, what's your what's your dream role, Vivian.
Speaker 16: I'd probably say Alphaba from Wicked on Broadway hopefully, I
Speaker 16: don't know. It also depends on what type of acting
Speaker 16: career I want. Whether I was told that I have
Speaker 16: to be defined as either a theater or a film aster.
Speaker 16: So it's really difficult to pick and choose. But I
Speaker 16: have been told by others from my alma mater that
Speaker 16: I shouldn't be defined by that decision.
Speaker 2: If you have to, if you have to choose, to
Speaker 2: go with a film actor, because it's way easier because
Speaker 2: you do it once and then it's for it because
Speaker 2: you know, look right, Because for a theater actor, every
Speaker 2: time you want someone to see it, you have to
Speaker 2: do it. Yeah yeah, But the film you do it
Speaker 2: once and then you show so, hey, I did it,
Speaker 2: I did it, and you can show it to them.
Speaker 2: The theater you have to fucking do it every time
Speaker 2: someone watches it.
Speaker 16: Oh yeah, listen, I completely understand. Like I've been doing
Speaker 16: theater since I can't. I came out of the room
Speaker 16: tap dancing, so it's I don't know, it's just I'm
Speaker 16: used to doing all this live, so film would be
Speaker 16: a harder, you know, way to adapt, you know, just
Speaker 16: trying to get around that.
Speaker 2: Well, thank you for sharing with this, Vivian. I'm I
Speaker 2: hope you have a good Vivian by the way, good
Speaker 2: act good good actress name.
Speaker 4: Thank you.
Speaker 2: It's not my actual name, but yeah, well now you
Speaker 2: have a you've got a good stage name for yourself. Well,
Speaker 2: thank you for sharing, Vivian. I'll talk to you soon, of.
Speaker 16: Course, definitely. It was great to talk to you too.
Speaker 4: All right, have a good one, you two.
Speaker 2: Good night.
Speaker 1: All from Lyle, Lyle.
Speaker 7: Hello, how are you going?
Speaker 1: I'm good?
Speaker 2: Is that your real name? It actually is?
Speaker 12: And I wanted to ask you really quick if you
Speaker 12: were named after a family member like I was, because
Speaker 12: it's like an older it was a popular name in
Speaker 12: like the forties and shit.
Speaker 2: I think I was named after my like great aunt
Speaker 2: Libby or something. I don't know how they got to
Speaker 2: Libby from Lyle, but I mean, I don't know how
Speaker 2: they got to Lyle from Libby, but that's what happened.
Speaker 2: And now I'm and now I'm talking to you.
Speaker 6: It is so cool.
Speaker 4: I'm so.
Speaker 12: I'm glad I finally got through, good to talk to thank.
Speaker 2: I mean it might not be it might not go well,
Speaker 2: we don't know yet. You might hang out, you might
Speaker 2: leave this feeling disappointed. I don't think If I don't,
Speaker 2: I hope you don't. I don't want to.
Speaker 12: That's not my goal henceforth.
Speaker 2: Okay, good, all right, if you have no expectations, well
Speaker 2: you said, this is cool. Yeah, that's it. That's an expectation.
Speaker 7: Well, but I'm okay, that's no, okay, actually.
Speaker 2: No, I think that's more of an observation because you're
Speaker 2: not it's not an anti. You didn't say you're you're observing.
Speaker 2: You feel already this is cool.
Speaker 12: Because I'm trying to you, like I haven't tried that
Speaker 12: many times.
Speaker 15: I will.
Speaker 12: I already told you. I just met my girl. I
Speaker 12: don't know, so what I went in general? Okay, happiness.
Speaker 12: I think most people want happiness. But then that's like
Speaker 12: a loaded answer.
Speaker 2: Right, how do you define happiness?
Speaker 12: I don't know. It's like, well, it's like a I
Speaker 12: guess what I mean by happiness is like a satisfaction
Speaker 12: with with life and a sense of place and.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 12: Uh, fulfillment.
Speaker 2: How old are you, Lyle twenty five?
Speaker 8: Well?
Speaker 2: What what's given you fulfillment in the past?
Speaker 4: M hmm.
Speaker 12: Completing like projects and like setting goals and then you'd
Speaker 12: like actually succeeding in the goal. That's always pretty satisfying.
Speaker 2: Definitely. What kind of projects have you completed?
Speaker 12: Oh god, I don't know. Moved across the country. I
Speaker 12: had like that goal for a while, and then moved
Speaker 12: to another city on this new side of the country
Speaker 12: that I'm on, and h things seem to be going well.
Speaker 12: I was getting a little impatient with it when I
Speaker 12: first moved to this most recent city, because I, like,
Speaker 12: you know, it's just there's a lot of stuff that
Speaker 12: always comes with that, but a lot of hard changes,
Speaker 12: not knowing many people. But you know, I'm starting to
Speaker 12: adjust and adapt, and I think adapting feels really good.
Speaker 2: It's a good Definitely, there is a deep sense of
Speaker 2: accomplishment and being able to move to a brand new
Speaker 2: place and just be like without knowing anyone or with
Speaker 2: only knowing a few people, and just you know, being
Speaker 2: able to just out of fucking nowhere forward your own life.
Speaker 2: What have you what have you done to adapt? Especially?
Speaker 2: I don't know if this was reason, but that's I
Speaker 2: I have no idea how I would do that in
Speaker 2: a coronavirus world.
Speaker 7: Got so like I moved.
Speaker 12: My initial like big move from Missouri to Washington State
Speaker 12: was before COVID.
Speaker 6: That was like.
Speaker 12: January or June, like twenty nineteen, so that was a
Speaker 12: little bit before. That was about the year before old stuff.
Speaker 12: And then the most recent move was in COVID and
Speaker 12: it was definitely a lot harder to find a job. So, yeah,
Speaker 12: working in the kitchen now, I was doing tree work
Speaker 12: before that.
Speaker 2: What is tree the work where.
Speaker 12: You like climb like climbing them, Yeah, climbing them to
Speaker 12: work on them, take out.
Speaker 2: As you can get paid to climb trees.
Speaker 12: Yeah, well yeah, that's it. Sounds like there is like
Speaker 12: research stuff where you do like mostly just climbing and
Speaker 12: like do like sampling of like a dick, like drilling cores.
Speaker 12: But what I was doing was removing dead trees and shit.
Speaker 12: So you like climb with a chainsaw, and like.
Speaker 2: How is your upper body strength? You climb trees with
Speaker 2: a chainsaw? Yeah, that sounds very difficult. It was.
Speaker 12: It was fucking dangerous. I don't do it anymore. I'm
Speaker 12: like kind of glad I'm not doing it anymore, but
Speaker 12: I might get back doing.
Speaker 2: It anymore too. I don't want you to get hurt.
Speaker 2: You sound like a nice guy. I don't want you
Speaker 2: to chop your fucking face off with a chainsaw.
Speaker 12: Yeah, I don't want to do that.
Speaker 2: It can happen, well, Lyle, I said, we do we
Speaker 2: have the same name.
Speaker 12: Yeah, it's pretty cool, right, do you don't know.
Speaker 2: Any other Liles. You don't know that many other Liles,
Speaker 2: do you?
Speaker 5: I don't.
Speaker 12: I don't think I've ever met another Lile in person.
Speaker 10: Either.
Speaker 12: This is the closest I've gotten to meeting another Lile.
Speaker 12: Like most of the connection, we.
Speaker 2: Got to do something, we got to put together, like
Speaker 2: a group or something. I don't know how we can
Speaker 2: fie on. It could be the Lis.
Speaker 13: That would be cool.
Speaker 2: All right, I'll text you Reddit cool, I'll I'll talk
Speaker 2: to you soon.
Speaker 12: Hey, look at you man.
Speaker 2: You have a good night, you too, Oh, Lyle forever baby,
Speaker 2: I said, the name of the thing.
Speaker 15: All from Lyle the Wildcat Cat.
Speaker 2: Lyell the what.
Speaker 12: Lile the wildcat?
Speaker 2: Say this again? Turn your stream off? Lyle the Wildcat,
Speaker 2: Liele the Wildcat.
Speaker 15: Yeah, what Lile the wildcat?
Speaker 2: What makes you a wildcat? Lyle?
Speaker 1: There's a lot of things.
Speaker 15: I'm a little wild.
Speaker 2: I don't like a cat, Lyle the wildcat. You you know,
Speaker 2: for a wild cat, you have a very soft voice,
Speaker 2: and I can't hear you very well.
Speaker 7: I'm sorry you're on that speaker phone on my phone.
Speaker 2: I take off a speakerphone. This is a private conversation
Speaker 2: between you and me. That no one else is allowed
Speaker 2: to listen to.
Speaker 3: This is terrific.
Speaker 16: When I found out your name was Lyle, I was like, hey,
Speaker 16: I got the same name.
Speaker 2: There's there's no there's no way you also have the
Speaker 2: same name Lyle as the other guy.
Speaker 1: What how do you slaw your name?
Speaker 15: Lyle? How do I your name?
Speaker 4: Come on?
Speaker 15: Everybody knows how to spell Lyle?
Speaker 2: Can anyone else hear this man and understand words that
Speaker 2: is coming out of his mouth?
Speaker 12: No one understands what I'm saying?
Speaker 2: Really?
Speaker 12: Really?
Speaker 2: Why? All right, Lyle? Uh, you're having a we're having
Speaker 2: a bit of technical issues here. And I also, I
Speaker 2: don't know, I don't I don't really understand your vie vibes.
Speaker 6: No way, man, I've been calling you so many times.
Speaker 2: All right now I can hear you, you know what?
Speaker 2: You know what I think what happened was you were
Speaker 2: doing a weird thing and I couldn't hear you. And
Speaker 2: now that I see, so I'm going to hang up
Speaker 2: on you. You're you're d You're talking like a normal person.
Speaker 12: Oh man, Lyle, come on, dude.
Speaker 2: Right now, I can hear.
Speaker 13: No, you can hear me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, keep doing that, Keep talking like a normal person.
Speaker 12: Was I talking like an alien person?
Speaker 6: I don't know.
Speaker 12: I don't know what this is, my man, it's a
Speaker 12: Lyle conversation.
Speaker 2: What do you want, Lyle the Wildcat.
Speaker 8: That's a good question.
Speaker 17: I guess I just want to calm down and I'll
Speaker 17: be so wild.
Speaker 9: Absolutely.
Speaker 12: Yeah, that's pretty much.
Speaker 2: We'll take a breath.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, taking the deep breath.
Speaker 2: You don't have to tell me, just do it.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 2: How do you feel you were too busy just telling
Speaker 2: me that you were going to do it and then
Speaker 2: laughing when I said, not tell me to do it.
Speaker 2: You didn't even do it. I did it, of course,
Speaker 2: said how do you feel?
Speaker 6: It feels good you did.
Speaker 12: Just now, I've been trying to reach out for you
Speaker 12: for a long time. I like I like your streaming.
Speaker 2: Thank you pretty appreciate that. I appreciate that.
Speaker 3: Now you asked how I spell my name, I'll tell you.
Speaker 2: Maybe I did all.
Speaker 3: I was just kind of circling.
Speaker 8: Back to that.
Speaker 2: But no, it's no, I was wrong.
Speaker 6: Just now.
Speaker 12: I apologize, no words, no words, but I'll let you
Speaker 12: leave the conversation.
Speaker 7: This is your show, so go ahead, man, tell me
Speaker 7: what's up.
Speaker 2: Thank you for calling Lyle, I'll talk to you soon.
Speaker 1: You're worries all from I think Michael bullshit.
Speaker 2: Michael bullshit, Michael bullshit, Michael bullshit, Michael bullshit. Oh hello,
Speaker 2: can you turn off your stream for me? Please?
Speaker 7: I got you done?
Speaker 2: How are you doing, Michael Bullshit?
Speaker 7: Depends on the day today, I'm okay?
Speaker 2: How were you on Wednesday?
Speaker 7: On Wednesday was a very particular shitty day because I
Speaker 7: had a ice cap. It's a coffee drink from a
Speaker 7: Canadian company called Timmis, and for thirty minutes I was
Speaker 7: looking forward to drinking it in the morning, and I
Speaker 7: was getting pulled side by by different staff at the
Speaker 7: hospital and I couldn't drink it. And then when I
Speaker 7: finally got to the boardroom to go and drink it,
Speaker 7: I dropped it and spilt everywhere.
Speaker 2: So what is an ice cap composed of?
Speaker 7: It's essentially a slushy coffee.
Speaker 2: A slushy coffee like a frappucino.
Speaker 7: Kind of. But if ice cap because it's Canadian?
Speaker 2: Do you live in Canada? I do? Oh, what's it
Speaker 2: like there? What's the hospital like?
Speaker 7: Well, I go all over the province. I work at
Speaker 7: every hospital, but they're pretty quiet. During this time of
Speaker 7: the year, not too many people are there, and Canada
Speaker 7: is not too bad. I would just say that people
Speaker 7: have a misconception about its being nice, and I would
Speaker 7: argue that we are not nice. We are assholes, but
Speaker 7: we are polite assholes.
Speaker 2: How do you what? Is it just an asshole and
Speaker 2: a polite asshole? How can someone be polite about being
Speaker 2: an asshole?
Speaker 7: Let me think about that for a moment, because I
Speaker 7: do have an answer.
Speaker 2: Okay, we'll wait, I'm not busy, all.
Speaker 7: Right, fair enough. I would say that an asshole has
Speaker 7: a disregard for their feelings, but a polite asshole at
Speaker 7: least feels bad after say sorry.
Speaker 2: And by the way, I was about to say the
Speaker 2: regretful assholes. But there's a difference between feeling bad about
Speaker 2: what you did and regretting.
Speaker 1: What you did.
Speaker 7: That's a good point. Perhaps the two can go hand
Speaker 7: in hand. I mean sometimes I feel well, no.
Speaker 2: Because if I let's say that I'm an asshole to you, right,
Speaker 2: and I feel bad that I did it, but I
Speaker 2: had to do it. I don't regret it. I would
Speaker 2: do it again, but I feel bad doing it.
Speaker 7: Yeah, that's fair, I deserved it. But because you felt bad.
Speaker 7: You're a polite asshole. You're not just an asshole.
Speaker 2: I would say, I don't know if that's true. I
Speaker 2: don't know if that's true. That's a little bit of
Speaker 2: a cop out to me. Just because I feel bad
Speaker 2: about doing something doesn't mean it doesn't lessen the impact
Speaker 2: of what I did.
Speaker 7: Did I deserve it? Was I being an asshole to you? First?
Speaker 7: Did you have to be an assle?
Speaker 5: Back to me?
Speaker 2: When's the last time you were an asshole?
Speaker 7: That's a good question. I don't have a specific example,
Speaker 7: but I don't remember off the top of my head.
Speaker 7: But I'm a pretty nice guy, and.
Speaker 2: To anadi, to be honest, I guess yeah.
Speaker 7: I'm nice to a fault times. I'm like a doormat
Speaker 7: and I let people walk all over interesting.
Speaker 2: I feel like you do you secretly wish you were
Speaker 2: more of an asshole? Michael bullshit?
Speaker 7: I do, yes, m M.
Speaker 2: Can you I know you were okay? So you were
Speaker 2: you had trouble coming up with a story or or
Speaker 2: an anecdote, or or or thinking about the last time
Speaker 2: in which you were an asshole? But could you think
Speaker 2: of the last time in which you were walked over
Speaker 2: for being too nice.
Speaker 7: Absolutely, Uh, tell me weeks ago before I left my
Speaker 7: wife twelve months actually, But I'm more free now.
Speaker 2: You said, a few weeks ago when you left your wife, Well,
Speaker 2: a few weeks ago.
Speaker 7: I officially stopped talking. But a few months ago, don't
Speaker 7: we separated?
Speaker 2: Oh well you mean left? You mean like left?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: Was she walking over you?
Speaker 7: Oh yeah?
Speaker 2: What was she doing? Uh?
Speaker 7: She didn't like when I got confident and I was
Speaker 7: doing something with my life and she didn't, so she
Speaker 7: kind of put me down. But as time went on,
Speaker 7: I realized that, you know, it's not me who's the problem.
Speaker 7: What she's saying and doing was really just a projection
Speaker 7: of her own reality and her own dream. And so
Speaker 7: when I realized that, it made me feel immune to
Speaker 7: the opinion of her and the actions of her. And
Speaker 7: I'm not the victim of needless suffering anymore.
Speaker 6: So I like that.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, so yeah. You know, look, a lot of people,
Speaker 2: they fucking try to tell you how to live your life,
Speaker 2: how to do your thing, but it's projection of whatever
Speaker 2: they think of, you know, their life and their thing.
Speaker 7: Well exactly and honestly, in the society today, I feel
Speaker 7: like people make ansumptions too quickly, and they don't have
Speaker 7: the courage to ask questions and express what they really
Speaker 7: want anymore. And we should we should communicate clearly to
Speaker 7: not just avoid misunderstandings, but sadness and drama and and
Speaker 7: and once people realize that, I feel like they can
Speaker 7: transform their life because you're.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry your wife?
Speaker 4: Sure?
Speaker 2: What was like? Can I get? Can I get any
Speaker 2: kind of like concrete example, like like, do you have
Speaker 2: an example of like something you did that she didn't like?
Speaker 7: Yeah, let me think about that. Uh, there were both
Speaker 7: legitimate things and non legitimate things. So a legitimate thing
Speaker 7: would be me, not like putting down the toilet seat.
Speaker 3: The rest.
Speaker 7: Honestly, it wasn't things I did. It was again her,
Speaker 7: it was it was her own insecurities, and she'd project
Speaker 7: what she thought was the truth, Like if if I came,
Speaker 7: you know, ten minutes late from work, I must have
Speaker 7: been up to something bad. So I didn't really do anything.
Speaker 7: It was just more of walking on eggshells and not
Speaker 7: leaving when what I did was not leave sooner. That's
Speaker 7: what I did.
Speaker 2: She was she was insecure about you, you know, coming
Speaker 2: home late and stuff.
Speaker 7: I guess and and so I stopped coming home late.
Speaker 7: I really do care about how people feel, and so
Speaker 7: I don't want her to feel that way. And so
Speaker 7: I transformed my whole life around making her happy, and
Speaker 7: I lost who I was and I found myself being
Speaker 7: apologetic to people and you know, over explaining myself and
Speaker 7: not having that confidence anymore.
Speaker 4: And so.
Speaker 7: I just didn't like who I was becoming.
Speaker 2: Mhmm, Yeah, I like that. You know. Look, that's a
Speaker 2: good uh, that's a good lesson to learn, you know,
Speaker 2: not to fucking live your life for other people, even
Speaker 2: if they're you know well. I mean, look, if there's
Speaker 2: someone that's close to you, it's like you shouldn't. They shouldn't.
Speaker 2: They shouldn't expect you to live your life for them.
Speaker 2: They should like you for the life that you live
Speaker 2: for yourself.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I fuck with that. I think that's great, man.
Speaker 2: I'm glad to hear that. You're, you know, uh, living
Speaker 2: by the cut of your own sword these days. Mean
Speaker 2: be mean to more people. Don't feel bad about it.
Speaker 2: It's it's kind of it's fun. Yeah, you mean to everyone.
Speaker 7: Confidence helps with that. And I just want to say
Speaker 7: something to the people in the chat. You guys, don't
Speaker 7: expect your life like some people in the chat seem
Speaker 7: to think my life suddenly figured out, But it isn't.
Speaker 7: You're not going to change overnight and feel happy. Your
Speaker 7: changes are small increments, and stop trying to cut cold
Speaker 7: turkey your old life and start something fresh and new.
Speaker 7: Don't change anything about it.
Speaker 5: Keep doing whatever you're doing, and just add.
Speaker 7: Something small to it that you can maintain. Poleeks on ends,
Speaker 7: add something of value and start there.
Speaker 2: Someone else, someone else in the chat, wants you to
Speaker 2: uh sort of bring you back to earth. They want
Speaker 2: you to know to put the fucking seat down next time.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I started to do that, and I now put
Speaker 7: on a tiel before I exit the shower. I'm learning
Speaker 7: how to be a big boy, good good.
Speaker 2: I'm glad to hear that you you know, haven't gotten
Speaker 2: to uh you know, into yourself. You got a home
Speaker 2: to yourself. Sometimes I'm trying. Well. Thank you, Thank you
Speaker 2: for sharing that, man. I appreciate that.
Speaker 15: I love.
Speaker 2: I love I love the story, I love the the
Speaker 2: the vibes. No, that was stupid. I don't know why
Speaker 2: I said that. That was a stupid thing to say.
Speaker 2: But I love the resilience, not fucking living your life
Speaker 2: for other people. It's a good it's a good message.
Speaker 7: Thank you, appreciate it.
Speaker 2: What their name was, Michael Bullshit? No, no, don't tell me,
Speaker 2: don't tell me. Whichever the real life is. I know
Speaker 2: it's not bullshit, but it's funnier to think it's bullshit.
Speaker 2: Thank you, Michael bullshe I'll talk to you soon.
Speaker 6: I love you.
Speaker 2: I love you too.
Speaker 4: All from Drew.
Speaker 2: Drew.
Speaker 13: Oh hey, uh uh, how are you doing.
Speaker 2: To care? What what? Dodw I have a question for you? Okay, why?
Speaker 13: Yeah, it's all about the little things, the little things
Speaker 13: that provide joy.
Speaker 2: Get tell me about these little things that provide you joy? Drew.
Speaker 13: Well, I've been uh, I've been refurbishing old video game
Speaker 13: consoles the past few weeks. It's been kind of fun.
Speaker 7: I like that.
Speaker 3: That's that.
Speaker 2: That's a cute little side hustle you got there. That's
Speaker 2: a good one.
Speaker 13: Yeah, it's pretty fun.
Speaker 4: What what what? What?
Speaker 2: What makes the most money? What's what? What is the
Speaker 2: highest margins?
Speaker 13: Oh dude, I haven't even been selling them like I
Speaker 13: just had. I've just found a big good will and
Speaker 13: I'm like it was a anys a good will and
Speaker 13: then a PS two and I was like, I'm just
Speaker 13: gonna take.
Speaker 2: This, So do you know how to like you know
Speaker 2: how to like rip shit apart and do the the
Speaker 2: science ship and make it into a real thing, not
Speaker 2: vaguely enough to do enough that it did the thing
Speaker 2: turns on.
Speaker 15: Yeah.
Speaker 13: Yeah, Like, uh the I'm just kind of this PS
Speaker 13: two working today. They just need to be cleaned out.
Speaker 13: It was like stupid dusty in there, and uh it works,
Speaker 13: it works right now. There was even a disc inside
Speaker 13: it when I bought it, and I was like, that
Speaker 13: was what was the disc? Let me check?
Speaker 2: All right, We'll wait.
Speaker 1: Uh oh I didn't like that.
Speaker 2: Wait a little.
Speaker 3: Here we go.
Speaker 13: It's a battle racing ignited, Burnout revengeance.
Speaker 2: Oh that sounds horrible.
Speaker 13: Yeah, racing game.
Speaker 3: I know that much.
Speaker 13: I'm a working controllers, so I can't replay.
Speaker 3: It, but I have it.
Speaker 2: Well, look, I'm glad that this is something you're enthusiastic about.
Speaker 2: Uh but look at you know. I know you're a holder,
Speaker 2: but at some point you got to sell. You got
Speaker 2: to sell these game consoles. You got to make a
Speaker 2: little bit of cash. Because it sounds like, sounds like
Speaker 2: you've got some good skills going on here. I like,
Speaker 2: I like it as a hustle, but but I'm over.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to ruin you. Why why you know what? No,
Speaker 2: don't take my advice. Don't monetize this hobby. Enjoy it
Speaker 2: because you're gonna be dead. Enjoy the process of doing this.
Speaker 2: Don't listen to me. Don't never sell your ne s.
Speaker 2: It's gonna be It's all you. It's worth the little
Speaker 2: happiness jeez that you get when you when you do it.
Speaker 2: Would you say your name was Drew? Well, thank you
Speaker 2: for calling Indre. I hope you have a uh, you know,
Speaker 2: as good of a rest of the evening as you
Speaker 2: possibly can.
Speaker 1: You too, good night.
Speaker 2: It happened now. But yeah, and there's all sorts of
Speaker 2: like general bullshit of like you know, follow well, wow,
Speaker 2: know what are your interests?
Speaker 17: I mean, I like marketing too, I like to be creative.
Speaker 17: I was kind of a low point, like back, I
Speaker 17: like to drink, but now I just I don't drink
Speaker 17: anymore because it gets me nowhere and kind of in trouble.
Speaker 17: So I kind of had to find new interests and
Speaker 17: go back to what they were before. So I guess
Speaker 17: I'm still discovering that about myself now, getting in touch
Speaker 17: with what I liked before, you know, the party years
Speaker 17: and I like hiking nature stuff like that. But yeah,
Speaker 17: just trying to find something that works. But I guess
Speaker 17: that's why I called you, Like you're saying thirty four
Speaker 17: is not too old. Like you know, I'm a single guy.
Speaker 17: You know, I moved back home like with my family,
Speaker 17: so I'm kind of feeling like the stigma there. I
Speaker 17: don't know if that's like the right move. I am
Speaker 17: saving money. I heard a previous call, you know, you
Speaker 17: were talking that kid was nine team who was working
Speaker 17: at tackle Bell like that. That was a good move,
Speaker 17: you know when you're young. But in my like tool
Speaker 17: to be doing that shit, I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2: Well, I mean, look, is there a huge difference between
Speaker 2: do you do you consider there'll be a giant difference
Speaker 2: between thirty four and thirty six? No? All right, Well,
Speaker 2: if you saved money for two years, how if you
Speaker 2: didn't spend it. If you lived at home with your
Speaker 2: parents and then save a dime and you didn't spend
Speaker 2: a dime, you know, you'd probably save up a uh,
Speaker 2: you would probably say yes to the question of is
Speaker 2: there a big difference between the amount of money you
Speaker 2: would have now and the amount of money you would
Speaker 2: have then, right, you know, But I don't know. I
Speaker 2: don't have concrete advice because like, definitely, you know, it's
Speaker 2: never been easier before, because I mean, there's all these
Speaker 2: tools on the internet to He'll be markt with shit
Speaker 2: TikTok is incredible and changes people's lives overnight. But I
Speaker 2: don't know. Man. My whole thing is that I would
Speaker 2: just pursue whatever is most pressingly interesting to you right
Speaker 2: now and just give it a shot. Not in the
Speaker 2: sense of like I have to choose one thing forever,
Speaker 2: but you know, I would just try whatever is currently
Speaker 2: the most interesting to you and see.
Speaker 17: If it works. And I apologize if you've talked about
Speaker 17: this before, but I'm just really curious about your background
Speaker 17: and like how you got started? Was was therapy?
Speaker 15: Gecko?
Speaker 17: Was that a lightning idea?
Speaker 15: Did you plan this out?
Speaker 3: Was just like a dream?
Speaker 2: Like how did that?
Speaker 17: How did this all start?
Speaker 2: I don't have an incredible story. I mean it would
Speaker 2: take like it's really it was kind of the intersection
Speaker 2: of like fifty different things, but I I it was
Speaker 2: a lot of it was really our PAN. I don't
Speaker 2: know if you know what our PAN is. I'm out
Speaker 2: there right now, but ARPAN. It's called the Reddit Public
Speaker 2: Access Network. I saw I start. I started the therapy
Speaker 2: get Goo just on Reddit, like eight months ago, just
Speaker 2: because I thought Reddit was Reddit. Streaming was was interesting,
Speaker 2: and I had a Gecko costume for an unrelated reason,
Speaker 2: and I started streaming on there, and and I kept
Speaker 2: doing it, and now I'm here. And I also agree
Speaker 2: with the sentiment of I did. I did not think
Speaker 2: I would get this far. So I'm just keeping it moving,
Speaker 2: keeping it rolling.
Speaker 7: You're doing a great job.
Speaker 17: I mean, I appreciate you sharing that you're sharing the story,
Speaker 17: and that's how I found you on TikTok. It was
Speaker 17: literally you know, I scrolled TikTok a lot these days,
Speaker 17: and you're the most creative thing I stumbled across. And
Speaker 17: I'm just it's really awesome we're talking with you right now,
Speaker 17: and to be part of your show.
Speaker 2: Well, I appreciate that. I know you're lying because you've
Speaker 2: seen all the people doing that. I'm on a sugar crush.
Speaker 2: I got a pocket cash thing song, so I'm not
Speaker 2: as bad as those people.
Speaker 13: But it's different.
Speaker 15: Man.
Speaker 17: It's creative and it's uh, it's cool just events, you know,
Speaker 17: just to chat. And I think a lot of people
Speaker 17: are missing that connection right now and uh, you know,
Speaker 17: just want to talk. So it's it's a great platform
Speaker 17: to do that. So I mean, you're making me feel better.
Speaker 17: I'm not too old, you know. And I think of
Speaker 17: it as like, I guess you know, I don't want
Speaker 17: to be all negative. You're the silver lining is I
Speaker 17: got freedom. You know, there's a lot of opportunity to
Speaker 17: I don't feel trapped into doing any one thing or
Speaker 17: you know, not having like a family, or being stuck
Speaker 17: in a situation.
Speaker 5: I don't want to be in it.
Speaker 17: I definitely don't feel stuck. So I'm happy about that.
Speaker 2: Good. Well, thank thank you for calling in man. I
Speaker 2: appreciate all the kind words, and I hope you have
Speaker 2: a good rest of the evening.
Speaker 17: Thanks Gak you too, love your show.
Speaker 2: Thank you Mann, you have a good night.
Speaker 7: Take care.
Speaker 12: Never again goes on the line thanking your phone calls
Speaker 12: every night.
Speaker 2: Never again goes to and teaching you out