1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,880 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five, 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah hart Hunger. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:33,920 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:36,400 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode one hundred and eighty two, 11 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:39,880 Speaker 1: which is airing in late January. I'll be interviewing Kristin 12 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,840 Speaker 1: Meinzer for this. Many people know her from the Buy 13 00:00:42,880 --> 00:00:46,160 Speaker 1: the Book podcast, but she also has other podcasts which 14 00:00:46,159 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 1: we were trading off on that one. You listened to 15 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:51,400 Speaker 1: Buy the Book all the time, right, Sarah, I do. 16 00:00:51,479 --> 00:00:53,479 Speaker 1: I don't think I've listened to every single episode, but 17 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:57,200 Speaker 1: I have listened to a lot. It's a really fun 18 00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,000 Speaker 1: podcast for those of you who want like a more 19 00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:02,639 Speaker 1: huge focused podcast, but it also gets pretty emotional too. 20 00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:06,080 Speaker 1: They take a self help book and sometimes that genre 21 00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:07,680 Speaker 1: like they'll bend it because I'm going to talk about 22 00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:09,959 Speaker 1: my favorite episode, which is not like classic self help, 23 00:01:10,319 --> 00:01:12,320 Speaker 1: but they live by the rules of that book for 24 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:15,000 Speaker 1: I believe two weeks. They often drag their partners into 25 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:17,760 Speaker 1: it as well, and then they reconvene and talk all 26 00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:21,080 Speaker 1: about how that went, and it's often very, very funny, 27 00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:24,319 Speaker 1: and they're both for Kristin and her co host Jolenta 28 00:01:24,319 --> 00:01:26,840 Speaker 1: are like they definitely have comedic backgrounds as well. Like 29 00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:31,160 Speaker 1: you you can tell they're trained performers, and it's a 30 00:01:31,319 --> 00:01:33,480 Speaker 1: very I don't know, like you can tell. A lot 31 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:35,400 Speaker 1: goes into each episode, a lot of editing, a lot 32 00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:37,760 Speaker 1: of work, and they're really really funny. So my favorite 33 00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:41,600 Speaker 1: episode ever was, or recently anyway, was the Martha Stewart 34 00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:45,640 Speaker 1: Entertaining episode where they read like Martha's original blockbuster from 35 00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:48,600 Speaker 1: like the late eighties or maybe early nineties, and they 36 00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:51,320 Speaker 1: lived by it and it was just very funny and entertaining. 37 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:53,440 Speaker 1: So sure, I won't be there for the interview, but 38 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:55,960 Speaker 1: I'm so excited to hear it because I love her 39 00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:58,200 Speaker 1: and that's not the podcast. I'm gonna be honest first, 40 00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:00,720 Speaker 1: by the way, I'm on a different one. We'll be 41 00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:03,200 Speaker 1: talking about you know, TV and movies, which is interesting. 42 00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:06,160 Speaker 1: I'm not really a TV or movie person, but maybe 43 00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:09,400 Speaker 1: she'll have suggestions for me that I will be able 44 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:12,959 Speaker 1: to watch. What I mean, you haven't seen anything in theaters, 45 00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:16,080 Speaker 1: nobody has in like a year. But what television are 46 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:18,519 Speaker 1: you watching right now? Yeah? So I mentioned on a 47 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:21,120 Speaker 1: recent episode that we are just finishing the first season 48 00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:22,880 Speaker 1: of The Flight Attendant, which is kind of like a 49 00:02:22,919 --> 00:02:27,840 Speaker 1: thriller on HBO. It's really well acted, it's really stressful 50 00:02:27,919 --> 00:02:31,080 Speaker 1: but fun It's also funny, like it's like gory but 51 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:34,399 Speaker 1: funny at the same time. We enjoyed Silicon Valley. We 52 00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:36,720 Speaker 1: do watch this a is us like pretty much never 53 00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:40,800 Speaker 1: miss an episode. Penn fifteen is a little known cringe 54 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:44,600 Speaker 1: comedy show about which stars too like women in their 55 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:49,040 Speaker 1: earlate thirties playing middle schoolers. It's very entertaining, and there 56 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:52,160 Speaker 1: was like a mini Kaling producer series called Never Have 57 00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:54,239 Speaker 1: I Ever that I really liked last year. So we 58 00:02:54,280 --> 00:02:55,799 Speaker 1: don't watch a ton of CV, like I don't watch 59 00:02:55,840 --> 00:02:59,239 Speaker 1: I don't even I would say we watched two episodes 60 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,919 Speaker 1: of something per week, like it's minimal. But if you 61 00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:03,920 Speaker 1: watch two episodes a week, that's one hundred shows a year, 62 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:06,440 Speaker 1: so you know, it adds up to something. And I 63 00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:08,839 Speaker 1: do find lying in bed and watching TV shows, which 64 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:12,000 Speaker 1: is how we always do it, very relaxing and fun. Yeah, 65 00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:14,119 Speaker 1: I just haven't been watching much. I guess I'm still 66 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:16,360 Speaker 1: trying to get back to the wonder That was What 67 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:18,360 Speaker 1: Not to Wear, which I think was like my favorite 68 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:20,880 Speaker 1: show all time. That was a great show. It was 69 00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:24,880 Speaker 1: a great show in so many ways. And all right, 70 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:28,880 Speaker 1: we'll be diving into the interview here. Well, I'm here, 71 00:03:28,919 --> 00:03:31,320 Speaker 1: this is Laura, and I am delighted to be interviewing 72 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:34,760 Speaker 1: Kristin Meinzer and Kristin is a culture critic, author and 73 00:03:34,880 --> 00:03:38,560 Speaker 1: podcast host, both of Movie Therapy with Raefer and Kristen 74 00:03:38,640 --> 00:03:41,120 Speaker 1: and By the Book with Jolenta Greenberg, which I know 75 00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:43,280 Speaker 1: a lot of our listeners love. We have a lot 76 00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:46,119 Speaker 1: of self help fans around here, probably not quite as 77 00:03:46,120 --> 00:03:49,480 Speaker 1: dedicated a self help fan as you are, but people 78 00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:51,640 Speaker 1: who do their best. What else would you like to 79 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:55,080 Speaker 1: tell listeners about yourself? And welcome Kristin. Oh, thank you. 80 00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:56,840 Speaker 1: I'm so excited to be here. Laura. I've been a 81 00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:58,520 Speaker 1: big fan of your work for a long time, so 82 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: it's such an honor to be here. But as far 83 00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,400 Speaker 1: as the other stuff I'm up to, I have a 84 00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:05,960 Speaker 1: couple of books out there. One is about podcasting called 85 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:08,320 Speaker 1: so you Want to Start a Podcast? I have another 86 00:04:08,360 --> 00:04:10,920 Speaker 1: book that's called How to Be Fine, which is all 87 00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:13,960 Speaker 1: about the experiences Jolenta and I have had living by 88 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:16,640 Speaker 1: the first fifty self help books that we lived by 89 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:19,719 Speaker 1: on by the Book. And I also have a little 90 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:24,080 Speaker 1: amish romance novel that I wrote as a challenge for 91 00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:26,200 Speaker 1: our podcast By the Book. I wrote it in under 92 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:29,400 Speaker 1: two weeks, and the quality of the book really reflects 93 00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:34,400 Speaker 1: that which help book told you to write a two 94 00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:37,800 Speaker 1: week book? I'm very curious. Yes, yes, the book was 95 00:04:37,839 --> 00:04:40,680 Speaker 1: called how to write an ebook in less than seven 96 00:04:40,720 --> 00:04:43,080 Speaker 1: to fourteen days that will make you money forever. Just 97 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:46,239 Speaker 1: rolls off the tongue. That that is a very clear 98 00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:50,280 Speaker 1: benefit statement. I will give it that you're not clear 99 00:04:50,360 --> 00:04:51,920 Speaker 1: what the self help book will do, but that is 100 00:04:52,120 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 1: very clear what that one will do for you. But see, well, 101 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,120 Speaker 1: we'll talk about By the Book. I know, because I 102 00:04:58,120 --> 00:04:59,480 Speaker 1: know we have a lot of fans of that here. 103 00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:04,560 Speaker 1: But newest podcasts focuses on TV and movie recommendations. I 104 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:07,520 Speaker 1: know a lot of us have probably massively increased our 105 00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:11,080 Speaker 1: screen time over the past year. And from what I 106 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:13,600 Speaker 1: get from you, you're saying this is not a horrible fit, right, 107 00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:16,160 Speaker 1: So this is absolutely not I don't think it's horrible. 108 00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:17,840 Speaker 1: I know that a lot of us were brought up 109 00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:21,600 Speaker 1: to think that the TV is a problem, it's our downfall, 110 00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:24,560 Speaker 1: it's going to eat our brain cells. In my household, 111 00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:27,479 Speaker 1: we even called it the dumb dumb box. And you 112 00:05:27,520 --> 00:05:29,920 Speaker 1: know what, TV is also great for a lot of 113 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:32,440 Speaker 1: things that informs us, that connects us, that makes us 114 00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:34,880 Speaker 1: feel less alone. It allows us to be part of 115 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:38,880 Speaker 1: bigger cultural moments. And I'm really grateful for the TV 116 00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:40,880 Speaker 1: right now. I mean, I don't get to see my 117 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:43,520 Speaker 1: friends as much as I used to. Obviously, I don't 118 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,080 Speaker 1: get to go to the movie theater, which I missed 119 00:05:45,160 --> 00:05:47,120 Speaker 1: quite a bit. As a film critic. I used to 120 00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:49,320 Speaker 1: go to the movies up to five times a week, 121 00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:52,640 Speaker 1: and so I really miss that. And I just really 122 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:56,719 Speaker 1: appreciate all of the new ways that TV has changed 123 00:05:56,760 --> 00:06:00,440 Speaker 1: for this moment. For example, Netflix has this party where 124 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:02,640 Speaker 1: you can watch a movie synced up with somebody else 125 00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:04,800 Speaker 1: you love at another location at the same time, and 126 00:06:04,839 --> 00:06:06,880 Speaker 1: you can chat back and forth, and it's almost like 127 00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:11,000 Speaker 1: being together watching a movie. And you know, other streaming 128 00:06:11,040 --> 00:06:13,640 Speaker 1: services out there are now make it making it easier 129 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:15,560 Speaker 1: and easier to see movies that we would have only 130 00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:18,359 Speaker 1: seen in the theater before. So I do feel that 131 00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,719 Speaker 1: TV is stepping it up for us and it's made 132 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:24,000 Speaker 1: this moment a little bit more bearable, which we need 133 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:27,280 Speaker 1: anything that can make this moment a little bit more bearable. 134 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:32,480 Speaker 1: But your podcast, like listeners or guests come to you 135 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:35,479 Speaker 1: with questions of you know, what should I be watching? 136 00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:39,160 Speaker 1: What are some just tell people about it. They come 137 00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:42,640 Speaker 1: to you with challenges and you prescribe things to watch 138 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:45,520 Speaker 1: for its What are the challenges that movies and TV 139 00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:48,240 Speaker 1: can solve? Yeah, so the show is kind of an 140 00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:51,240 Speaker 1: advice column show. We answer three letters per show. The 141 00:06:51,279 --> 00:06:53,839 Speaker 1: first two letters could be about anything, and the final 142 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:56,640 Speaker 1: letter of the show is always what should I watch next? 143 00:06:56,920 --> 00:07:00,160 Speaker 1: But what should I watch next? Questions pretty self explanatory. 144 00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,240 Speaker 1: They might say, For example, I just binged all of 145 00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:05,560 Speaker 1: Bridgerton in one day, What should I watch next? Or 146 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:08,760 Speaker 1: I finally got around to watching Shit's Creek. I loved it, 147 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:10,800 Speaker 1: I'm missing it so much? What should I watch next? 148 00:07:10,840 --> 00:07:12,680 Speaker 1: So we give them a recommendation at the end of 149 00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:15,040 Speaker 1: the show. But the first two letters could be about anything. 150 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:18,480 Speaker 1: In some cases, it's parents who are exhausted who One 151 00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:21,040 Speaker 1: of our earliest letters was, I wish I could take 152 00:07:21,080 --> 00:07:24,600 Speaker 1: a vacation from my children. And we also get ones 153 00:07:24,640 --> 00:07:27,600 Speaker 1: all the time from people who are frustrated and having 154 00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:30,200 Speaker 1: a hard time staying motivated with their work. We get 155 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:32,360 Speaker 1: people who are upset with their roommates. We get people 156 00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:35,840 Speaker 1: who are suddenly fantasizing about that ex boyfriend from college 157 00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:38,559 Speaker 1: because maybe their own husbands are driving them nuts right now. 158 00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:40,840 Speaker 1: We have people who are in long distance relationships. We 159 00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:43,120 Speaker 1: have people who are having trouble sleeping. We have people 160 00:07:43,120 --> 00:07:45,880 Speaker 1: who just need a good cry. We get all sorts 161 00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:48,200 Speaker 1: of questions that run the gamut, and then Rafeer and 162 00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:51,280 Speaker 1: I try to administer a little bit of advice. And 163 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:53,240 Speaker 1: some of that advice is based on what I learned 164 00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:55,520 Speaker 1: on my other podcast, by the book, and some of 165 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:57,680 Speaker 1: it's just based on my own mistakes I've made over 166 00:07:57,720 --> 00:07:59,800 Speaker 1: the years, and Rafer and I are pretty open about 167 00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:02,240 Speaker 1: all the mistakes we've made over the years. And then 168 00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:04,560 Speaker 1: we offer them a TV and a movie recommendation. That 169 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: we hope will comfort them or give them some insights 170 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:11,800 Speaker 1: to look at their situation a little bit differently. Yeah, 171 00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:14,000 Speaker 1: and you know a lot of listeners of this podcast 172 00:08:14,040 --> 00:08:16,840 Speaker 1: are are parents, and your co host Rifer is in 173 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:20,320 Speaker 1: fact doing everything with his children right now in a 174 00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:23,840 Speaker 1: tiny book in the Yeah, in his wife. I love 175 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:26,440 Speaker 1: them so much. I don't know how they do it. 176 00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:28,600 Speaker 1: It's what's called a railroad. One room just leads to 177 00:08:28,640 --> 00:08:30,800 Speaker 1: the other, leads to the nother, and it's you know, 178 00:08:31,040 --> 00:08:33,280 Speaker 1: the two kids, it's the two adults, all of them 179 00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:36,439 Speaker 1: on top of each other, and they've managed to keep 180 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:39,160 Speaker 1: their spirits up throughout all of this. But it's a 181 00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:43,040 Speaker 1: tough situation them. Lots of screen time recommendations. I'm curious 182 00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:47,600 Speaker 1: his thoughts on kids and screen time. Well, his general 183 00:08:47,600 --> 00:08:49,840 Speaker 1: thought on the matter is whatever you have to do 184 00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:53,319 Speaker 1: to get through the day. And let's not criticize people 185 00:08:53,320 --> 00:08:55,760 Speaker 1: who need to give their kids a little extra screen 186 00:08:55,800 --> 00:08:59,080 Speaker 1: time to stay sane. Let's not criticize parents who need 187 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:02,200 Speaker 1: a little screen time as a little vacation. And we 188 00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:04,480 Speaker 1: really believe everybody is doing the best they can and 189 00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:06,400 Speaker 1: don't want to We don't want to criticize anybody for 190 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:10,120 Speaker 1: whatever they're doing. And there's so much great nourishing children's 191 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:12,920 Speaker 1: entertainment out there now that there wasn't when we were kids. 192 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:15,280 Speaker 1: I mean, if you want to turn on your computer, 193 00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:18,040 Speaker 1: you can watch Dolly Parton read you a bedtime story. 194 00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:20,040 Speaker 1: There's so many different kinds of screen time you can 195 00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:22,400 Speaker 1: have for kids right now, and a lot of it's 196 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:25,000 Speaker 1: so wholesome, and a lot of it's really educational, and 197 00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:27,760 Speaker 1: a lot of it's great conversation starters. And one thing 198 00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:30,040 Speaker 1: Rayfe and I like to remind our audience of is 199 00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:32,840 Speaker 1: both he and I were essentially babysat by the TV 200 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:36,560 Speaker 1: when we were children, and our whole generation essentially was 201 00:09:37,120 --> 00:09:39,520 Speaker 1: we watched lots of TV forty fifty hours a week 202 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:41,480 Speaker 1: when we were little kids, and Refa and I turned 203 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:45,240 Speaker 1: out fine, or we think we did, and so just 204 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:48,880 Speaker 1: perpetuating the joy that comes with it. Yeah, and I 205 00:09:48,920 --> 00:09:51,520 Speaker 1: mean we only had a choice of what four shows 206 00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:54,600 Speaker 1: at a time. Oh yeah, absolutely, Oh and some of 207 00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:58,480 Speaker 1: them were just terrible back then, they were. In fact, yeah, 208 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:02,280 Speaker 1: I watched many of and myself. So let's move on 209 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:05,360 Speaker 1: to buy the book. So at this point you've lived 210 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:07,600 Speaker 1: by the rules of how many self help books. I mean, 211 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:10,160 Speaker 1: your book was about the first fifty, but there's been more. 212 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:13,440 Speaker 1: So Yes, we're now living by our sixtieth book as 213 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:16,640 Speaker 1: I speak, but we are not releasing that episode for 214 00:10:16,679 --> 00:10:18,560 Speaker 1: a few more months. We're working on the eighth season 215 00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:21,160 Speaker 1: of the show right now, and we have a really 216 00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:23,600 Speaker 1: fun season theme. I won't go into it, but for 217 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:25,960 Speaker 1: those who aren't familiar with the show, every episode we 218 00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:29,280 Speaker 1: choose a different self help book to live by. We 219 00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:32,240 Speaker 1: follow all the rules down to the letter, and then 220 00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:34,520 Speaker 1: we record ourselves so you can hear how each book 221 00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:36,840 Speaker 1: enhances or destroys our lives. So you get to hear 222 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:38,960 Speaker 1: us fighting with our husbands. You get to hear us 223 00:10:38,960 --> 00:10:41,599 Speaker 1: do things like touch every item in our house to 224 00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:43,520 Speaker 1: see if it sparks joy and then get rid of 225 00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:45,680 Speaker 1: it if it doesn't. You get to see us living 226 00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:48,040 Speaker 1: by terrible cookbooks. You get to see us trying to 227 00:10:48,040 --> 00:10:50,160 Speaker 1: move traffic with our minds when we were living by 228 00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:52,679 Speaker 1: the Secret. You get to see us doing all sorts 229 00:10:52,679 --> 00:10:56,920 Speaker 1: of things where we're trying to manifest our thoughts into things. 230 00:10:57,000 --> 00:11:00,240 Speaker 1: And you know, we've lived by a very very wide 231 00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:04,120 Speaker 1: range of books, doing everything from reworking our wardrobes to 232 00:11:05,080 --> 00:11:08,719 Speaker 1: learning the love languages with our husbands. To some of 233 00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:10,360 Speaker 1: the books, I got to say, they're terrible. We've lived 234 00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:12,280 Speaker 1: by some very bad books too, like men are from Mars, 235 00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:15,120 Speaker 1: women are from Venus. Don't live by that, please, don't. 236 00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 1: Nobody lived by that. And one season of the show 237 00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:20,079 Speaker 1: we lived by self help books through history, and we 238 00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:23,080 Speaker 1: lived by a bestseller from the thirties, forties, fifties all 239 00:11:23,080 --> 00:11:25,320 Speaker 1: the way to the present and had a historian on 240 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:27,920 Speaker 1: with us to give us context throughout it. So there's 241 00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:29,800 Speaker 1: a lot to learn from self help books, not just 242 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:33,520 Speaker 1: about ourselves, but about what our values are, and what 243 00:11:33,559 --> 00:11:35,320 Speaker 1: our culture and what our history is at a certain 244 00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:38,600 Speaker 1: point in life. Yeah. Well, and I'm sure everyone's dying 245 00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:41,440 Speaker 1: to know. I mean, of the books that you've read. Well, 246 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,760 Speaker 1: two versions of this question. First, what did you find 247 00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:46,319 Speaker 1: most helpful for your life the book that if you 248 00:11:46,320 --> 00:11:48,079 Speaker 1: would rank at the top or maybe the top two 249 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:51,080 Speaker 1: or so. And then if you're going to recommend a 250 00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:53,760 Speaker 1: book more broadly, like if somebody is saying, well, I'm 251 00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:56,240 Speaker 1: curious about the self help genre, I think it's a 252 00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:58,920 Speaker 1: waste of time. What's the one book it would give them, 253 00:11:59,040 --> 00:12:00,920 Speaker 1: you know, tell them to pick up change their minds. 254 00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:03,680 Speaker 1: Oh wow, the book to change your mind. I think 255 00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:08,439 Speaker 1: might be why good things happen to good people. This 256 00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:11,760 Speaker 1: is a ten step book that One reason I like 257 00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:13,880 Speaker 1: the book is because books that are organized well and 258 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,920 Speaker 1: actually have concrete steps to follow, which most self help 259 00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:19,920 Speaker 1: books don't. Most are very disorganized and not very well written. 260 00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:24,280 Speaker 1: But it's research backed. It has, you know, ten specific steps, 261 00:12:24,679 --> 00:12:28,800 Speaker 1: and it's really about how when you do certain things 262 00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:31,920 Speaker 1: that perpetuate kindness in the world and goodness in the world, 263 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:34,920 Speaker 1: it's a feedback loop and it makes us happier too. 264 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:38,560 Speaker 1: It gives us an endorphin rush, and it also creates 265 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:41,760 Speaker 1: the world that is going to be more happy making 266 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,520 Speaker 1: for the rest of us. So a lot of the times, 267 00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:46,000 Speaker 1: what we're sad about in the world, it's not just 268 00:12:46,040 --> 00:12:48,160 Speaker 1: because of us. It's because the world is not set 269 00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:52,280 Speaker 1: up fairly. It's not equitable, it is sexist, it is racist. 270 00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:56,640 Speaker 1: There are a lot of inequalities economically and so forth 271 00:12:56,679 --> 00:12:59,000 Speaker 1: in the world. And sometimes when we do kind things 272 00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:01,440 Speaker 1: in the world and we make the world a little 273 00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:04,280 Speaker 1: bit better, that helps other people and it also helps us. 274 00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:07,040 Speaker 1: So i'd recommend that book to someone who's skeptical about 275 00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:10,640 Speaker 1: self help because it's not woo woo. It's very you know, constructive, 276 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:13,160 Speaker 1: and I think some self help books are very woo woo, 277 00:13:13,200 --> 00:13:15,360 Speaker 1: and that turns off people horned into self help books. 278 00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 1: Let's take a quick ad break and then we'll come 279 00:13:17,559 --> 00:13:27,200 Speaker 1: right back with Kristen's most helpful self help book. Hey, listeners, 280 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:30,720 Speaker 1: at Best of both Worlds, we love sleep and we 281 00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:33,400 Speaker 1: want you to enjoy every minute of sleep you can get, 282 00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:37,439 Speaker 1: and that starts with a great mattress. Helix Sleep has 283 00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:40,040 Speaker 1: a quiz that takes just two minutes to complete and 284 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:43,199 Speaker 1: matches your body type and sleep preferences to the perfect 285 00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:45,920 Speaker 1: mattress for you. 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They have a ten year warranty 296 00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:17,439 Speaker 1: and you get to try it out for one hundred 297 00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:20,240 Speaker 1: nights risk free. They'll even pick it up for you 298 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:23,040 Speaker 1: if you don't love it, but you know what you will. 299 00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:26,440 Speaker 1: Helix is offering up to two hundred dollars off all 300 00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:30,120 Speaker 1: mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners at 301 00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:36,720 Speaker 1: helixsleep dot com slash best of that's Helixsleep dot com 302 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:46,280 Speaker 1: slash best of All. Right, well, we're back with Kristen 303 00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:49,560 Speaker 1: Meinzer and he is talking about her favorite self help 304 00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:51,960 Speaker 1: books right now. So you know you've read sixty, you've 305 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:53,720 Speaker 1: lived by the rules of sixty. What are you still 306 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:56,760 Speaker 1: using in your life that you find useful? You know, 307 00:14:56,960 --> 00:15:00,200 Speaker 1: one thing that really surprised me was how much I 308 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,720 Speaker 1: I enjoyed How to Win Friends and Influence People by 309 00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:06,520 Speaker 1: Dale Carnegie from the nineteen thirties. And I had not 310 00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:10,480 Speaker 1: read that until the show essentially forced me to. And 311 00:15:11,280 --> 00:15:14,280 Speaker 1: I was so surprised with how good that book was. 312 00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:16,800 Speaker 1: And you know, that book's almost one hundred years old 313 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:20,240 Speaker 1: but has lessons that are so useful no matter what era. 314 00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:24,040 Speaker 1: We live in asking people questions, being excited to learn 315 00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:27,240 Speaker 1: about them, not just making it about ourselves. But the 316 00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:29,280 Speaker 1: one thing that I think about all the time from 317 00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:32,960 Speaker 1: that book is his advice to be the dog. So 318 00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:36,840 Speaker 1: when you think about a dog, a dog doesn't hold 319 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:39,040 Speaker 1: a grudge when you come home from work. The dog 320 00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:41,120 Speaker 1: is always so excited to see you when you come home. 321 00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:43,880 Speaker 1: The dog always treat you like you matter. That's what 322 00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:45,560 Speaker 1: we should be doing for people we love. That's what 323 00:15:45,560 --> 00:15:46,920 Speaker 1: we should be doing for each other. We should all 324 00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:50,320 Speaker 1: be the dog, right. And I just loved that bit 325 00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:51,760 Speaker 1: of advice and I think about that all the time. 326 00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:54,520 Speaker 1: I want to be the dog. I'll be the dog. Yeah, 327 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:59,320 Speaker 1: that is a great self help book, he smile. That 328 00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:02,720 Speaker 1: is a same we should do, yes, and other people 329 00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:04,960 Speaker 1: an eager want, like if people think it's their own idea, 330 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:08,120 Speaker 1: there's absolutely yes. I love that in the book. Yeah, 331 00:16:08,120 --> 00:16:10,440 Speaker 1: and give people credit for things, even if they didn't 332 00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,240 Speaker 1: even come up with it themselves. Give them the credit 333 00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 1: because then they'll want to do it even more. Yeah. Absolutely. 334 00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:18,680 Speaker 1: Oh he's a fascinating guy. He's so good. Oh. I 335 00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:21,480 Speaker 1: think that's a really good idea. You're you're suggesting that 336 00:16:21,520 --> 00:16:25,040 Speaker 1: you wash the dishes. You're so good at washing dishes. Idea, Laura, 337 00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:27,320 Speaker 1: that's the way you wash the dishes. I could never 338 00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:31,960 Speaker 1: wash the dishes that well. Hopefully I walk away and 339 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:35,520 Speaker 1: not have to do it now, exactly exactly. You know, 340 00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:37,960 Speaker 1: it's funny, have you you've read seven habits of highly 341 00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:41,040 Speaker 1: effective people? Haven't you? Or are you say? I have not? 342 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:44,240 Speaker 1: It's been suggested many, many times, but we have yet 343 00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,920 Speaker 1: to do that. I interviewed many years or I know 344 00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:50,400 Speaker 1: this woman who did her PhD dissertation on self help 345 00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:54,440 Speaker 1: books in which she found most useful, and that one 346 00:16:54,520 --> 00:16:57,200 Speaker 1: came out at the top seven habits, with how to 347 00:16:57,200 --> 00:16:59,960 Speaker 1: win friends and Influence people also being a very high 348 00:17:00,560 --> 00:17:02,880 Speaker 1: one on the scale because both very good good I 349 00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:05,600 Speaker 1: don't think from Mars women from Veidus came up near 350 00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:07,960 Speaker 1: the top. Oh no, I remember that shouldn't be on there. No. 351 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:13,440 Speaker 1: I you know, if something has good organiza, what is 352 00:17:13,480 --> 00:17:16,679 Speaker 1: it that makes a good self help book? Well, in 353 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:20,760 Speaker 1: addition to that organization, I think that the author needs 354 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:24,920 Speaker 1: to be able to see past themselves. Oftentimes somebody will 355 00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:27,040 Speaker 1: write a self help book because there was this one 356 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:29,119 Speaker 1: thing that worked for them. But then you'll take a 357 00:17:29,119 --> 00:17:32,160 Speaker 1: closer look at them and realize, like, oh, that's their 358 00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:36,280 Speaker 1: particular foible or obsession, and that doesn't necessarily work across 359 00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:38,920 Speaker 1: the board for most people. If the person who's writing 360 00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:42,720 Speaker 1: the book can be full of awareness and self reflection 361 00:17:42,760 --> 00:17:44,640 Speaker 1: when they write the book, I think that always helps 362 00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:46,639 Speaker 1: the book quite a bit. There are too many authors 363 00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:48,720 Speaker 1: out there who say if I can do it, anyone can, 364 00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:52,639 Speaker 1: and they're lacking the self reflection of like, oh, hold on, 365 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:54,639 Speaker 1: I was born on third base. My parents paid my 366 00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:56,320 Speaker 1: way through college. They gave me a down payment for 367 00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,680 Speaker 1: my first house. Of course, I was able to become, 368 00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:00,879 Speaker 1: you know, a best selling author and speaker when I 369 00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:03,280 Speaker 1: never had to upfront any money myself. But they never 370 00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:05,640 Speaker 1: say that. And then when you start digging deeper, you'll 371 00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:07,679 Speaker 1: see a lot of the self help authors didn't do 372 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:10,000 Speaker 1: it themselves, and yet they're sending out the message if 373 00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:12,320 Speaker 1: I can do it, anyone can. So I'd always say 374 00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:14,840 Speaker 1: that an author who is self aware and owns their 375 00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:18,360 Speaker 1: privilege is going to write a better book. And I'd 376 00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:21,080 Speaker 1: also say that when it comes to self help, a 377 00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:24,159 Speaker 1: book that makes clear that it is not the be all, 378 00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:26,199 Speaker 1: end all, because there are too many books out there 379 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:28,560 Speaker 1: that say this is the number one guaranteed way to 380 00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:30,840 Speaker 1: change your life, or this is the only method to 381 00:18:31,119 --> 00:18:34,120 Speaker 1: do a B or C. And that's not true. We're 382 00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:36,320 Speaker 1: all very very different, Thank goodness. How boring would it 383 00:18:36,359 --> 00:18:38,200 Speaker 1: be if we were all the same, And so any 384 00:18:38,240 --> 00:18:42,880 Speaker 1: book that promises that, I'm very suspicious of me too. 385 00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:45,880 Speaker 1: I'm also suspicious of any book that says we can 386 00:18:45,920 --> 00:18:48,640 Speaker 1: manifest a parking spot. But maybe you can convince them differently. 387 00:18:50,960 --> 00:18:53,080 Speaker 1: I did move traffic with my mind that one time. 388 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:55,480 Speaker 1: I really don't think it was the book. I think 389 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:58,760 Speaker 1: it was just like the car moved when I was 390 00:18:58,760 --> 00:19:01,040 Speaker 1: thinking of the event, and at some point, you know, 391 00:19:01,119 --> 00:19:04,480 Speaker 1: you're thinking about it. Maybe these are two things aligned 392 00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:06,280 Speaker 1: in the world, and then you're going to run with 393 00:19:06,359 --> 00:19:11,920 Speaker 1: it forever. Oh my goodness, that's a very recurring thing, 394 00:19:12,200 --> 00:19:15,600 Speaker 1: and a lot yes manifestation, So so good to know. 395 00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:19,560 Speaker 1: One of your assignments was to write a novel in 396 00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:22,000 Speaker 1: two weeks, as you said, the Amish Romance, which which 397 00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:24,640 Speaker 1: you did. How does one write a book in two weeks? 398 00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:27,720 Speaker 1: I am very curious. Well, that was my only time 399 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:31,840 Speaker 1: successfully doing it. And when I say successfully, I mean 400 00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:35,480 Speaker 1: it is not the best book ever written. I'm just 401 00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:37,320 Speaker 1: going to say here and now it is not the 402 00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:39,960 Speaker 1: best Umish romance you're ever going to read. And it's 403 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,280 Speaker 1: not I know how many people are going to read 404 00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:47,719 Speaker 1: along Amish romance, But according to that book we lived by, 405 00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:51,479 Speaker 1: it was really like very methodical. You are going to 406 00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:53,600 Speaker 1: come up with what the chapters are going to be, 407 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,040 Speaker 1: You're going to then fill in all the chapters. Then 408 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:57,560 Speaker 1: you're going to publish your book, then you're going to 409 00:19:57,600 --> 00:20:00,159 Speaker 1: make money forever. That was essentially all the instruction of 410 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:03,399 Speaker 1: the book. And I think the e book itself that 411 00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:06,119 Speaker 1: we lived by to write our e books, if you 412 00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:09,760 Speaker 1: printed it out, was about twelve pages, and so that's 413 00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:12,399 Speaker 1: set the bar very low. So it's like, oh, if 414 00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:14,399 Speaker 1: a book can be twelve pages, I can write a book. 415 00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:18,720 Speaker 1: I can do this. You can write it in in fact, yes, 416 00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:22,240 Speaker 1: we got a page today that works. Well, No, okay. 417 00:20:22,400 --> 00:20:24,520 Speaker 1: My book ended up being about forty pages and Joe 418 00:20:24,560 --> 00:20:27,760 Speaker 1: Lentz ended up being I think about ten. So you know, 419 00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:31,360 Speaker 1: they were not the most robust books, but they were 420 00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:34,800 Speaker 1: each micro bestsellers in their category, if that makes sense, 421 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:38,679 Speaker 1: like best selling Amish romance novel e book under forty 422 00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:43,720 Speaker 1: five pages published in the last week. You own that category. 423 00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:46,879 Speaker 1: I owned that category for the week. Yes, it was 424 00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:50,080 Speaker 1: all you. That's great. Well, let's let's go a little 425 00:20:50,119 --> 00:20:52,919 Speaker 1: crazy here and try to combine self help and screen 426 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:56,600 Speaker 1: time as you do. Are there any TV shows or 427 00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:59,000 Speaker 1: movies you think people can watch that will inspire them 428 00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:03,080 Speaker 1: to work harder towards their goals? Oh yes, Oh my gosh, 429 00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:07,200 Speaker 1: there are so many out there, and one I always 430 00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:10,480 Speaker 1: like to point to for just about any situation. I 431 00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:13,119 Speaker 1: don't care what your situation is in life, this movie 432 00:21:13,119 --> 00:21:15,600 Speaker 1: will help you. Nine to five, starring the great Dolly 433 00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:21,120 Speaker 1: Parton and Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin. And this is such 434 00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:23,040 Speaker 1: a great movie. If you haven't seen it, I'm sure 435 00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:26,040 Speaker 1: a lot of your listeners have. But it's the story 436 00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:29,600 Speaker 1: of three women working in an office, working very very hard, 437 00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:32,760 Speaker 1: not always getting credit for the work, being sexually harassed, 438 00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:37,959 Speaker 1: oftentimes doing just menial, thankless work. And they get together 439 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:41,320 Speaker 1: and they kind of overthrow the whole system. They kidnap 440 00:21:41,359 --> 00:21:44,879 Speaker 1: their boss and all their great ideas they put into place. 441 00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:47,600 Speaker 1: They put themselves front and center, and they take credit 442 00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:50,760 Speaker 1: for their ideas, and they change the workplace, not just 443 00:21:50,760 --> 00:21:53,240 Speaker 1: for themselves, but for everybody to make a better workplace 444 00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:56,680 Speaker 1: that's more diverse, that is more livable, that has better 445 00:21:56,720 --> 00:21:59,000 Speaker 1: work life balance. I mean, this is a movie from 446 00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:01,680 Speaker 1: I think the reduction of it was nineteen seventy nine. 447 00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,240 Speaker 1: So the fact that they were thinking about work life 448 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:07,200 Speaker 1: balance and fairness and equity and all of these things 449 00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:11,119 Speaker 1: and put it together into this hilarious, entertaining movie that 450 00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:13,879 Speaker 1: makes you cheer and makes you think I can go 451 00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:15,920 Speaker 1: out there and I can do it too, is such 452 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:18,480 Speaker 1: a huge accomplishment. And I've watched that movie again and 453 00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:21,040 Speaker 1: again and it still holds up. That's always good when 454 00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:24,160 Speaker 1: something can go through a rewatching and not be like, Okay, yeah, 455 00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:27,040 Speaker 1: time to move on. I got it. Those are the 456 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,520 Speaker 1: best books too, and you can release them as well. 457 00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:32,480 Speaker 1: A lot of our listeners are also, you know, have 458 00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:34,560 Speaker 1: young kids, many of them, you know, dealing with the 459 00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:36,960 Speaker 1: virtual schooling all day. You get the kids in bed 460 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:41,120 Speaker 1: at night. You want something that's just a total candy relax. 461 00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:45,160 Speaker 1: What how about some suggestions for that? Oh my gosh, 462 00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:47,320 Speaker 1: it depends on what kind of candy you like. So 463 00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:51,280 Speaker 1: if you want your candy to be a little racier, 464 00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:55,800 Speaker 1: a little naughtier. I already mentioned Bridgerton. I would highly 465 00:22:55,840 --> 00:23:00,919 Speaker 1: suggest Bridgerton. Bridgerton is a costume drama from Shonda Rhymes. 466 00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:05,600 Speaker 1: It's on Netflix and it is delicious. It looks on 467 00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:08,760 Speaker 1: the surface like any other regency romance, like, Oh I 468 00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:11,440 Speaker 1: must marry Well, I'm in the world of Jane Austin. 469 00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,800 Speaker 1: I'm wearing a gown that I can't actually walk out 470 00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:16,720 Speaker 1: in public, and because it will be soiled by the 471 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,640 Speaker 1: grass in the dirt, you know, and you know, I'm 472 00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:21,400 Speaker 1: just going to balls all the time, and one ball 473 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:23,240 Speaker 1: aft through another, and so that's what it might look 474 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:25,520 Speaker 1: like on the surface. Oh but it's not just that. 475 00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:28,600 Speaker 1: It's very naughty. It's very sexy. And you don't want 476 00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:30,040 Speaker 1: to watch that with the kids. You might want to 477 00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:32,040 Speaker 1: cozy up to somebody you love and watch that on 478 00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:33,800 Speaker 1: the couch after the kids are already in bed. So 479 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:36,040 Speaker 1: I think that's great, or if you want some more 480 00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:40,840 Speaker 1: mindless candy. I'm always a big fan of the British 481 00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:45,760 Speaker 1: competition series, you know, The Great British Bakeoff, or Big Dream, 482 00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,640 Speaker 1: Small Spaces, which is just it's a gardening show. It's 483 00:23:48,680 --> 00:23:51,200 Speaker 1: a way to zone out and watch other people who 484 00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:54,639 Speaker 1: don't know how to garden make a beautiful yard. And 485 00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:58,760 Speaker 1: these kinds of shows are frequently made fun of, but 486 00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:01,440 Speaker 1: they really are relaxed, and I understand there's a reason 487 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,520 Speaker 1: why they're all hits and why they make season after 488 00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:07,800 Speaker 1: season of them. They're very enjoyable, they're very satisfying. I mean, 489 00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:09,760 Speaker 1: you know, you start with a problem and you end 490 00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:12,720 Speaker 1: with the solution, and that's a lot of life doesn't 491 00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:16,040 Speaker 1: work that way. So when it does, which absolutely, yeah, 492 00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:18,200 Speaker 1: I love it before and after, I'm a huge fan 493 00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,800 Speaker 1: of a before and after. Life doesn't get fixed that easy, 494 00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:22,840 Speaker 1: but it does on TV. I know, in twenty two minutes. 495 00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:27,000 Speaker 1: It's wonderful. So Kristin, what's your daily life looking like 496 00:24:27,119 --> 00:24:30,320 Speaker 1: right now? I mean with multiple podcasts, writing books, you know, 497 00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:32,200 Speaker 1: or I mean probably like all of us, you're sitting 498 00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:35,840 Speaker 1: in your house, But I mean, what does that look like? Yes, 499 00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,520 Speaker 1: So right now I am joining you from what we 500 00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:41,760 Speaker 1: call my studio closet. This is a converted closet that 501 00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:44,919 Speaker 1: I'm in right now that Santa built out for me 502 00:24:45,000 --> 00:24:47,439 Speaker 1: a little over a year ago before COVID. He just 503 00:24:47,480 --> 00:24:49,720 Speaker 1: wanted me to have a home studio so I didn't 504 00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:51,840 Speaker 1: have to always run back and forth to studios, and 505 00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:53,840 Speaker 1: then I don't want to blame Santa for this. I 506 00:24:53,880 --> 00:24:56,520 Speaker 1: don't want to say he manifested COVID. But less than 507 00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:59,439 Speaker 1: two months after he installed this studio closet for me, 508 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,560 Speaker 1: I had to are living in it all the freaking time, 509 00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:04,280 Speaker 1: and I love it. So I spend a lot of 510 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,440 Speaker 1: my day in the studio closet, and then I also 511 00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:11,200 Speaker 1: try to do any writing I do from a room 512 00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:13,520 Speaker 1: that actually has windows. The room I'm in right now 513 00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:16,120 Speaker 1: has no windows. It's the quietest room in the house 514 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:19,000 Speaker 1: because it's what I record in and what I edit in. 515 00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:21,119 Speaker 1: But it can get kind of sad in here when 516 00:25:21,119 --> 00:25:23,400 Speaker 1: I don't have any sunlight. So I try to sit 517 00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:25,239 Speaker 1: in the front room for part of the day, and 518 00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:27,240 Speaker 1: then several times a week I try to do walking 519 00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:30,320 Speaker 1: dates with friends, and I think it's important to get 520 00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:32,479 Speaker 1: out of the house. It's easy for me to, just 521 00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:34,840 Speaker 1: like a lot of people, get caught up in inertia. 522 00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:37,119 Speaker 1: If I start here, I end here, and I have 523 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:39,000 Speaker 1: to interrupt it sometimes and make sure I get out 524 00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:43,760 Speaker 1: there and go on walks or meet friends for beverages. Fortunately, 525 00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:46,119 Speaker 1: in my part of Brooklyn, all the restaurants, bars and 526 00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:48,720 Speaker 1: coffee shops have outdoor seating right now. So I just 527 00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:52,199 Speaker 1: put on my snowpants and my snowjacket and meet up 528 00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,040 Speaker 1: a friend who has on their snowpants and snowjacket, and 529 00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:56,840 Speaker 1: we'll sit outside and have a cup of coffee or 530 00:25:57,200 --> 00:25:59,920 Speaker 1: have some lunch. And yeah, still try to go out 531 00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:02,840 Speaker 1: out of the businesses. By the book that you had 532 00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:05,760 Speaker 1: snow boots that were rated to forty below or something 533 00:26:05,880 --> 00:26:08,280 Speaker 1: like that, that you're going to need them just to 534 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,720 Speaker 1: get lunch. I mean, my gosh, I'm so grateful for 535 00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:14,600 Speaker 1: those boots. Yes, Chris, So we always end our episodes 536 00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:17,240 Speaker 1: with a love of the week, So that's something that 537 00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:21,679 Speaker 1: is exciting to us right now. It could be a 538 00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:24,440 Speaker 1: television show, it could be a book, anything like that. 539 00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:28,240 Speaker 1: I'll go first. I'm going to say Property Brothers, the 540 00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,040 Speaker 1: TV show. As we mentioned, I love it before and after. 541 00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:34,280 Speaker 1: And I'm in the middle, like knee deep in this 542 00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:38,160 Speaker 1: huge home renovation, not the one I'm living in currently, 543 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,600 Speaker 1: but one we just bought and hoped to move into soon. 544 00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:44,679 Speaker 1: And it's it's a lot, and so it's nice to 545 00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:48,920 Speaker 1: see a house be done in forty eight minutes, which 546 00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:51,919 Speaker 1: is not going to happen with ours, but we can 547 00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:55,199 Speaker 1: always dream. So how about you. First of all, I 548 00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:57,320 Speaker 1: feel your pain. We're in the middle of a renovation 549 00:26:57,359 --> 00:26:59,480 Speaker 1: that's been going on now for a full year, and 550 00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:01,639 Speaker 1: we're I forgot to mention that that's part of my 551 00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,440 Speaker 1: day today, life too, is living in our renovation scene. 552 00:27:04,680 --> 00:27:08,720 Speaker 1: But I am going to recommend something that is very 553 00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:12,040 Speaker 1: different from what you're loving this week, and it's a 554 00:27:12,040 --> 00:27:14,439 Speaker 1: little gritty, but I love it so much. It is 555 00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:17,920 Speaker 1: a new movie that's available for streaming right now called 556 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:22,480 Speaker 1: A Promising Young Woman. It stars Carrie Mulligan. And this 557 00:27:22,720 --> 00:27:26,160 Speaker 1: is a movie about a woman out for revenge. And 558 00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:29,520 Speaker 1: I love a woman who's out for revenge in the movies, 559 00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:32,359 Speaker 1: and there's something so satisfying about it. I'm not a 560 00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:34,760 Speaker 1: vengeful person, I don't think in real life. But I 561 00:27:34,840 --> 00:27:37,520 Speaker 1: love a woman who's standing up for what's right and 562 00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:41,040 Speaker 1: taking it back and doing that thing. And if you 563 00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:44,119 Speaker 1: like that too, if you know, like living vicariously through that, 564 00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:45,960 Speaker 1: you might love it as well. But that's what I've 565 00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:48,800 Speaker 1: been loving this week, is that movie that's awesome. We 566 00:27:48,840 --> 00:27:51,080 Speaker 1: always love it when the good guy wins. Yeah, Well, 567 00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:54,399 Speaker 1: Kristen Tell our listeners again, the name of your podcasts 568 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:57,120 Speaker 1: and books and how they can find you. Yes, so 569 00:27:57,560 --> 00:27:59,960 Speaker 1: my podcast where I live by self help books with 570 00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:02,720 Speaker 1: my friend Jill Wentta is called By the Book, and 571 00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:07,000 Speaker 1: my advice movie TV show podcast is called Movie Therapy 572 00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:10,400 Speaker 1: with Raefer and Kristen. Wonderful. Well, thank you so much 573 00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:12,679 Speaker 1: for joining us, Thanks for having me. That's been so 574 00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:16,240 Speaker 1: much fun. Well, that was fun, and now we're back 575 00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:19,399 Speaker 1: with our questions segment that This one was sent in 576 00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:23,560 Speaker 1: from Instagram. Can you share tips for transitioning from work 577 00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:28,480 Speaker 1: to mom mode when it is all happening at home? Well, Sarah, 578 00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:30,800 Speaker 1: you at least go to an office occasionally, but I 579 00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:33,040 Speaker 1: guess you've had to think about that because you sometimes 580 00:28:33,080 --> 00:28:37,040 Speaker 1: are at home then and transitioning. Do you do anything 581 00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:40,800 Speaker 1: to just run out of your office when it's time? Well, 582 00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:43,520 Speaker 1: they're talking about so I go to an office typically 583 00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:46,360 Speaker 1: twice per week, and then I work from home Tuesday, Thursday, 584 00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:49,720 Speaker 1: and Friday. Usually I definitely don't have any specific transition 585 00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:51,520 Speaker 1: when I'm working in the office because I'm driving home, 586 00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:53,800 Speaker 1: and I guess the drive is a transition when I 587 00:28:53,840 --> 00:28:56,040 Speaker 1: am home if I can, and I can't always because 588 00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:57,920 Speaker 1: it just depends on what I'm trying to accomplish and do. 589 00:28:58,400 --> 00:29:00,360 Speaker 1: But sometimes I'll end up with having like a late meeting, 590 00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:02,520 Speaker 1: and I'll try to take a walk during that meeting, 591 00:29:02,600 --> 00:29:04,320 Speaker 1: like it's a nice way to end the day, especially 592 00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:05,760 Speaker 1: if it's like a zoom that I can just listen to, 593 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:07,440 Speaker 1: because I find that there are a couple of meetings 594 00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,720 Speaker 1: that I have that are required around like the five 595 00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:12,400 Speaker 1: o'clock hour, where I don't actually have to contribute much. 596 00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:14,560 Speaker 1: It's more like an update kind of a thing. And 597 00:29:14,600 --> 00:29:16,000 Speaker 1: so if I do that, then I'll try to like 598 00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:17,560 Speaker 1: walk for like a little bit of extra time, like 599 00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:20,240 Speaker 1: even like ten minutes to just be like and the 600 00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:22,680 Speaker 1: day is done. So yeah, I guess that would be 601 00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:26,720 Speaker 1: when I can do it my ritual. It makes me 602 00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:29,120 Speaker 1: think of the fact that Calum Newport mentions on his 603 00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:31,240 Speaker 1: podcast that every time he finishes a work day, he 604 00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:34,560 Speaker 1: says schedules shut down, complete and checks off a box 605 00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:36,080 Speaker 1: and that like sounds like something I would do, but 606 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:39,560 Speaker 1: I've never actually tried it, and I would say I 607 00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:41,600 Speaker 1: don't do this, but it sounds lovely. I've heard some 608 00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:43,479 Speaker 1: people will like do meditation at the end of their 609 00:29:43,480 --> 00:29:45,360 Speaker 1: work day to kind of close out one thing and 610 00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:47,680 Speaker 1: start something else, or maybe even like a five minute 611 00:29:47,720 --> 00:29:50,320 Speaker 1: stretch or yoga video or like perfect time to foam 612 00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:53,760 Speaker 1: roll or something, just something to get you like out 613 00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:56,000 Speaker 1: of the work brain and into like a more state 614 00:29:56,040 --> 00:30:01,560 Speaker 1: of relaxation. Yeah, I don't do anything. It's just well, 615 00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:04,280 Speaker 1: I think there's different personalities and so I don't feel 616 00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:08,120 Speaker 1: like there's work me and home me, like it's it's 617 00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:11,840 Speaker 1: all the same. And so it's not that I need 618 00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:15,440 Speaker 1: to transition from one mode to the other. And so 619 00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:19,960 Speaker 1: because of that, I I don't necessarily have the same 620 00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:23,240 Speaker 1: kind of need or feel like I need a shut down, 621 00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:24,760 Speaker 1: which one. I mean, maybe somebody would look at me 622 00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:27,040 Speaker 1: and be like, no, no, you're just a walking stress basket. 623 00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:29,400 Speaker 1: You do. But I, you know, feel like my home 624 00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:31,960 Speaker 1: life isn't exactly like the relaxation. I mean this the 625 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:34,280 Speaker 1: whole idea like makes it feel like, oh, well, I'm 626 00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:37,520 Speaker 1: leaving the stress of work to come into you know. No, 627 00:30:38,040 --> 00:30:42,120 Speaker 1: it's more like I have to gear up the dinner. 628 00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:43,880 Speaker 1: The dinner is going to be stressful, so I'm like 629 00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:47,640 Speaker 1: trying to like prepare myself. Okay, if you want to 630 00:30:47,640 --> 00:30:49,640 Speaker 1: talk of it that way, Like yesay, prepare yourself for 631 00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:53,080 Speaker 1: this next, you know, dive in to the craziness. Then 632 00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:55,280 Speaker 1: I guess, yeah, that would be one way to do it. 633 00:30:55,320 --> 00:30:57,960 Speaker 1: But no, I don't know. I I know that it 634 00:30:58,080 --> 00:31:00,280 Speaker 1: sort of is the best practice for many PEO people, 635 00:31:00,280 --> 00:31:02,080 Speaker 1: and so I would advise people who are new to 636 00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:04,360 Speaker 1: working from home to think about, you know, a shutdown 637 00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:06,880 Speaker 1: ritual to let themselves know that, Okay, the work day 638 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:08,840 Speaker 1: is over. I don't have to keep working all night 639 00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:10,720 Speaker 1: if you think that's going to be a problem for you. 640 00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:13,720 Speaker 1: But maybe part of like working for myself, as I 641 00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:15,160 Speaker 1: you know, if I'm working at night, it's because I 642 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:17,640 Speaker 1: told myself too. It's not like there's somebody else who's 643 00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:20,640 Speaker 1: who's encouraging me to do it. And often I can't 644 00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:23,080 Speaker 1: because there's you know, a zillion people in this house 645 00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:26,280 Speaker 1: who need something. So you know, maybe maybe at some 646 00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:28,080 Speaker 1: point in my life that will become an issue, but 647 00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:30,160 Speaker 1: right now it's not. I feel like this is one 648 00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:32,160 Speaker 1: where we should get this from our listeners. So if 649 00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:35,080 Speaker 1: you're listening to this and you have a nice end 650 00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:38,960 Speaker 1: of work ritual that you do to get into your 651 00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:42,280 Speaker 1: home brain, please let us know and we can share 652 00:31:42,320 --> 00:31:45,880 Speaker 1: it because I am curious. Yeah, exactly. All right, Well, 653 00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:48,720 Speaker 1: this has been Best of Both Worlds Episode one hundred 654 00:31:48,760 --> 00:31:50,920 Speaker 1: and eighty two, airing in late January. We've been talking 655 00:31:50,960 --> 00:31:53,600 Speaker 1: a lot about TV and such, but we'll be back 656 00:31:53,640 --> 00:31:55,760 Speaker 1: next week with more on making work in life fit together. 657 00:31:57,760 --> 00:32:00,560 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening. You can find me Sarah at the 658 00:32:00,560 --> 00:32:05,160 Speaker 1: shoebox dot com or at the Underscore Shoebox on Instagram, 659 00:32:05,360 --> 00:32:09,640 Speaker 1: and you can find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. 660 00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:13,000 Speaker 1: This has been the Best of Both Worlds podcasts. Please 661 00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:15,640 Speaker 1: join us next time for more on making work and 662 00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:16,880 Speaker 1: life work together.