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Speaker 1: Hi guys, Welcome to this week's episode of the PhD podcast.

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Speaker 1: This is your girl Ate and this week episode is

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Speaker 1: going to be about health as well. UM. I don't

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Speaker 1: have the pleasure, as you know, of introducing my guests,

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Speaker 1: so let's dump right into it. So, how did you

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Speaker 1: find out that you had cancer? Um? When I found out, Well,

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Speaker 1: let me start from the beginning. So, UM, I was

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Speaker 1: having issues with my foot, like it was just to

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Speaker 1: a point where I couldn't walk, and so was it

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Speaker 1: like swollen or no, as every time I stepped on

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Speaker 1: the ground like you know, the actual motions of actually walking,

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Speaker 1: it was just so painful. So, UM, I was in

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Speaker 1: North or South Carolina, I think believe in South Carolina.

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Speaker 1: It was random because it was like day one day

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Speaker 1: I was fine, the next day I was not able

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Speaker 1: to walk. And luckily for me, I was going to

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Speaker 1: fly back home next day. So oh, I go home, UM,

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Speaker 1: and I go to the e R. I had insurance.

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Speaker 1: I just didn't have like a PCP because my old

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Speaker 1: PCP change and I just never updated a whole new,

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Speaker 1: brand new PCP PCP those who don't know it was

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Speaker 1: primary care physician. Yes, I was gonna ask you for

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Speaker 1: those who didn't know what this means. Yeah, because a

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Speaker 1: lot of times I say a lot of people like

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Speaker 1: what I was like, oh my gosh, h but yeah, so, um,

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Speaker 1: I go to the emergency room. They just need to

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Speaker 1: go talk to your PCP. I was like, I need

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Speaker 1: a new one, so I'll go to the doctors my

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Speaker 1: local center, and I'll acquire about getting a brand new one.

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Speaker 1: So I got a brand new one. She's like, she

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Speaker 1: starts asking me about my family history. She's like, oh, um,

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Speaker 1: so tell me about yourself. Tell me about your family history.

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Speaker 1: I said, I'm the second of five kids. Um, I

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Speaker 1: have one brother that's still living, and I have two

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Speaker 1: other sisters that's still that's still living. And my older

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Speaker 1: brother passed away and not to do nine and she um,

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Speaker 1: she continues to say, how did he pass away? And

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Speaker 1: so she was I was like, oh, colon cancer, but

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Speaker 1: we didn't know until um the autopsy. Yeah, he was

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Speaker 1: twenty five and we're so when he passed away, I

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Speaker 1: was twenty four, So yeah, so very close. Yeah, only

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Speaker 1: a year and two months apart. Wow. Um, So I'm

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Speaker 1: telling her this and then she was like, oh, so,

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Speaker 1: how so I told her how old he was, and

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Speaker 1: she was like, um, wait a minute, because I think

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Speaker 1: when we when I was growing up, because at the

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Speaker 1: time when I found out, I was twenty nine, and

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Speaker 1: when night by time my brother passed away again, he's

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Speaker 1: twenty five. So for us at that age, we know

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Speaker 1: that people have colon cancer after like in their forties

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Speaker 1: and fifties. Well, even when we got the autopsy background,

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Speaker 1: we were just like, that's strange. It's funny how when

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Speaker 1: you a certain age, you think that a certain things

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Speaker 1: happen to people over eight of a certain age, Like

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Speaker 1: you don't think that. I'm gonna tell you this, this

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Speaker 1: a whole experience for me and my family. It just

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Speaker 1: times have changed because with the how food is process

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Speaker 1: these days and things or even our air is everything

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Speaker 1: is like everything contributing, contributes to all of this. But

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Speaker 1: of course we'll get to that part and so um,

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Speaker 1: so she's like, we need to set up a kornoscophy

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Speaker 1: for your no movie of us, Like why I don't

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Speaker 1: get it. So I was like I'm fine, Like at

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Speaker 1: this point, um, I had lots like about maybe eighty pounds,

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Speaker 1: like like around eighty pounds because I was my My

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Speaker 1: initial start weight was about two pounds and then at

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Speaker 1: that time, by the time I went in for that appointment,

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Speaker 1: I was about to seventeen too to something. And at

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Speaker 1: that point I had like an I G my whole

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Speaker 1: I G or my whole brand was dedicated to my health.

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Speaker 1: And I only started my weight loss because of I

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Speaker 1: have high blood pressure in my family. And I was like, so, wait,

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Speaker 1: so you was working out, he was into fitness, he

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Speaker 1: was eating right, m all of that. So for me,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, I don't even know why, why I

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Speaker 1: gotta go get this tested whatever, because you're not even

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Speaker 1: thinking that that can be even because again it's just

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Speaker 1: the ignorance because I don't know really much about cancer

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Speaker 1: other than the fact that it like many people die

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Speaker 1: from it. But I just automatically assume and visualize someone

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Speaker 1: who's without hair and frail. And I was heavy lifting

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Speaker 1: and I was even um training to compete physically for competition,

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Speaker 1: like fitness competitions, not the big because you know, she cute,

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Speaker 1: But what you trying to say, child, But I shave

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Speaker 1: me real, baby, I want to with a crown that

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Speaker 1: heels the glitter like you know, the we've make up.

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Speaker 1: I was ready for It was a red Day and

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Speaker 1: then so, um, you was funny nine righte. Wow, so

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Speaker 1: you literally about to be one year from womanhood, like

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Speaker 1: being a real grown woman. You don't understand anyway, So um,

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Speaker 1: and I can talk about it now because it's like

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Speaker 1: God's been so good, so I can say with a smile,

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Speaker 1: I can say it with like you know whatever. But

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Speaker 1: the life fourteenth was the day that my connoscope was

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Speaker 1: set for, so I'm going I was just like, can

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Speaker 1: we just get this over with? I got things to do.

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Speaker 1: So um, my co worker at the time, he he

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Speaker 1: brought me to the hospital. He stayed with me and

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Speaker 1: everything like that. And you know, I was It's like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: this is gonna be a procedure. I've never went under

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Speaker 1: for anything before, so I think that was the only

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Speaker 1: nervousness that I had because I was like, I've never

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Speaker 1: been under. What to expect? Expect? I was just like, okay,

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Speaker 1: so about to put a tube up my colon whatever?

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Speaker 1: So um they put me down. Um and they're in

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Speaker 1: the process of Well, first of all, for those who

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Speaker 1: do not know what a cool nooscopy is or even

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Speaker 1: the prep is, the prep is disgusting, Like they gave

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Speaker 1: you this like this big freaking dumbass tub, Like I

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Speaker 1: feel like it's bigger than a gallery, but it's probably

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Speaker 1: the same amount of pounces. But it's just like this

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Speaker 1: this this powder supplement that you just add water to

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Speaker 1: when you drink it, you drink it, you drink it.

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Speaker 1: It's just and what is supposed to do. It's supposed

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Speaker 1: to clean out my whole inside, like and are you

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Speaker 1: or legit sit And it's it's even to the point

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Speaker 1: where um, I couldn't shipped no more so with shipped

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Speaker 1: water like thing was it was clean, like I felt clean.

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Speaker 1: I felt like I bet you that ship, well you

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Speaker 1: should water. All you can't do is felt clean, Like

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Speaker 1: I didn't even finish the whole thing, Like I honestly

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Speaker 1: like that that whole that whole process is I I

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Speaker 1: hate it. So before you had the procedure done, you

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Speaker 1: have to drink that like right before or like a

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Speaker 1: couple of hours before before. So basically, if my appointment

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Speaker 1: was on a Monday, something I couldn't eat and I

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Speaker 1: had to eat with Saturday, So I what I did

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Speaker 1: because I was just like, well, well ship, they let

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Speaker 1: me go eat everything I want to do my cot

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Speaker 1: Then on Sunday. My preptice consisted of ginger rail, broth, popsicles,

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Speaker 1: not read nothing could be read, um, jello, everything that's

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Speaker 1: very light, like nothing solid. And that's the same prap

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Speaker 1: that you would have like for any surgery. Really, but

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Speaker 1: I think I think surgery is a bit different. But

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Speaker 1: because they're going too my cold and like I legit,

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Speaker 1: cannot eat anything the day before um and so I

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Speaker 1: didn't start drinking the thing until like maybe eight o'clock

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Speaker 1: at night, drink it halfway, stop drinking it, and then

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Speaker 1: drink it again six hours before my appointment. My appointment

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Speaker 1: was sucking the morning or eight o'clock in the morning

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Speaker 1: that we had to get up at two o'clock in

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Speaker 1: the wine and I was just like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: this is disgusting. I hate the process. The process probably

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Speaker 1: was even more expruciating. So you get to the appointment.

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Speaker 1: I get to the appointment, they put me down. I'm like, okay, cool,

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Speaker 1: I got you know whatever. I just want to hurry

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Speaker 1: up and get home. So I go under and I

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Speaker 1: wake up in the middle of the procedure. Wait, and

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Speaker 1: you was unconscious, like he was knocked out. It was

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Speaker 1: knocked out. You wake up in the middle of the

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Speaker 1: procedure and they said it was normal. I was like, um,

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Speaker 1: y'all are not done. So I legit got a tube

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Speaker 1: up my ass and then I'm looking at the at

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Speaker 1: the um something called the monitor, so basically as the

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Speaker 1: cameras up my ass, I'm looking at the screen like

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Speaker 1: I'm looking at the screen, and they see a polyp. Now,

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Speaker 1: polyp is just like a miniature like little uh. Um,

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Speaker 1: it's take something. It's like a little bump inside your coling. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they took it out. And that's not something that we

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Speaker 1: all have. That's something that is coming. Some people have it, uh,

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Speaker 1: most people do, so they have it. And so but

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Speaker 1: wait when you woke up, I mean, how did it

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Speaker 1: feel and you saw the thing up your ass? Like?

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Speaker 1: Was it uncomfortable? It just felt like something off my ass?

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Speaker 1: Like I'm serious, it really feels like something up your ass.

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Speaker 1: That's what it felt like. I just don't freaky anything.

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Speaker 1: But it wasn't uncomfortable. It was just something up my ass,

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Speaker 1: right whatever, but action so but but yeah, it was

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Speaker 1: just like okay, um, but I felt it was more

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Speaker 1: weird that I was able to wake up and see

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Speaker 1: it than anything else. And freak out. No it isn't.

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Speaker 1: It freaked me when this like the strobe or is

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Speaker 1: it all the strobe? I don't know the strobe, Like

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Speaker 1: it was a strobe light inside the slight. Yeah. So

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Speaker 1: they're they're pulling it out like they're like, oh, it

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Speaker 1: looks clean, it's clean. At the very end, while they're

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Speaker 1: about to pull out the thing, it was a pollet

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Speaker 1: that looked weird, and I looked at it. I was

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Speaker 1: just like, uh, that doesn't look normal. It was it

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Speaker 1: looked like a pollot, but it was bigger, it was discolored.

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Speaker 1: It was like so my whole cold and my clean,

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Speaker 1: my pretty colon was all pink. And it got to

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Speaker 1: the very end where it looked like it just looked

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Speaker 1: like it was simp like a little part of it

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Speaker 1: was like like it looked not red, but it was

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Speaker 1: like black grays blue. And so the doctors are like,

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Speaker 1: this looks interesting. Will take us back. And so they'll

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Speaker 1: say they said, we'll take a biopsy of this, and

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Speaker 1: I feel like they knew what it was, but they

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Speaker 1: didn't want to make me feel nervous because they were like, well,

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Speaker 1: we need to take we need to send this out

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Speaker 1: for biopsy, just to make sure you know. So then

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Speaker 1: it was like, oh, well, let we'll let you know

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Speaker 1: if anything is up. So I'm like okay, Um, of

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Speaker 1: course my friend from work he drove me home. Um,

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Speaker 1: and so I went. I went home arrested. The next day,

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Speaker 1: we got up for work and I didn't get it cald.

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Speaker 1: So I'm like, oh, I'm good. Hum. The next day

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Speaker 1: after two days later, two days later, god, two days later,

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Speaker 1: like two days later, Um, I'm driving on I'm literally

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Speaker 1: driving home, like on the phone with my girls from home.

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Speaker 1: I got a phone call from the hospital. I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 1: hey's sip. I'm thinking because they didn't call me yesterday

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Speaker 1: that everything was cool. I mean, that's what anybody with things,

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Speaker 1: you don't call me. But then the next day that

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Speaker 1: day he like, um, oh miss blank. He was like, uh,

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Speaker 1: we we examined the biopsy from the cornoscopy and we

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Speaker 1: found cancer. And I was like, God, and doesn't know

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Speaker 1: I'm driving. So it took him a while for him

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Speaker 1: to realize that he should have asked me, you know,

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Speaker 1: are you the common courtesy because you don't know what

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Speaker 1: I'm doing. Okay, what to this day, I do don't

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Speaker 1: know how I didn't crash into something like as soon

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Speaker 1: as he said, what was your reaction? Like, I mean,

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Speaker 1: I can't I can't even manage your reaction on top

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Speaker 1: of you driving. I I was not at the point

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Speaker 1: because I didn't I didn't really know what to do.

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Speaker 1: I don't even know how my foot was on the

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Speaker 1: gas pedal or break, how my arms were on the

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Speaker 1: steering like like one of those moments that I can't

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Speaker 1: really explain it to you because I don't think I

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Speaker 1: was there. Wow, yeah I was. I honestly was not

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Speaker 1: at that at that place. And so and then I

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Speaker 1: was just like so for me again being ignorant, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: so is it benige or or or malignant? He was

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Speaker 1: just like, it's malignant. Okay, now I explain it to

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Speaker 1: the different it also don't know, but now it is

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Speaker 1: something that they can remove easily, like it's I feel

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Speaker 1: like it's a it's a tumor that's like in a

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Speaker 1: capsule where it because they can just remove it and

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Speaker 1: it's like okay, boom, once we were moving. Um or

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Speaker 1: it could be something where they have to monitor it

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Speaker 1: sometimes because if it's a benign tumor, sometimes they'll like

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Speaker 1: monitor to see if it grows. Some hospitals are weird

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Speaker 1: like that. I don't know why anyone would think it's

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Speaker 1: okay for them to leave something cancers or tumor inside,

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Speaker 1: but whatever. You know, that's politics, but that's a different story. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, um, and so he said malignant and malignant

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Speaker 1: is basically it's it's it's there's a possibility that if

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Speaker 1: there's no capsule around the cancer that it's it's possible

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Speaker 1: that it can spread throughout all your orients, move the organs.

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Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, um, well i'm driving. That's

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Speaker 1: what I literally said. He was like, oh, I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 1: I should have asked you that first, right, And so

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Speaker 1: I was like okay. So I was like, you know what,

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Speaker 1: I can't I can't talk right now. UM. I just

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Speaker 1: don't know what to think or what to do. He

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Speaker 1: was like, you need to set up in a point

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Speaker 1: in what your PCD. And I was like, um, oh,

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Speaker 1: we already alerted your PCP, so you need to call them.

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Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, call the PCP. I was

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Speaker 1: just like I just got the word um from the doctors.

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Speaker 1: They said that I have cancer. They were like, we

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Speaker 1: need to see you asaph cancer right. So home, I

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Speaker 1: get home, I'm like, I can't tell anyone anything. I

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Speaker 1: can't tell anyone anything for me, it's more so like

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Speaker 1: I can't. It's like it's weird. During my whole time

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Speaker 1: that I had this um this illness, the hardest part

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Speaker 1: was telling my loved ones mm hmmm, like that to me,

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Speaker 1: and just like, especially since you're I can understand that,

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Speaker 1: especially since your older brother passed away from it, and

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Speaker 1: at that time, my parents were both out of the

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Speaker 1: country living their life I love you to Loca in

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Speaker 1: a whole different country, and so I didn't want to

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Speaker 1: worry them, Like, but I'm over here worried about everybody else.

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Speaker 1: It's just so strange. But anyway, so I get home.

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Speaker 1: My sister didn't go to work that day, so she's like, oh, hey,

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Speaker 1: I'm literally I walked in. We're talking blah blah blah.

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Speaker 1: I'm pretending like nothing's wrong. And then she's like, hey,

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Speaker 1: did you ever get a bo back from the from

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Speaker 1: the um from the philosophy? I started It's like a bull,

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Speaker 1: like a switch, yeah, because I couldn't. Like, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: why would she ask me? I was, Oh, my gosh,

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Speaker 1: like why would she ask me? I was like what

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Speaker 1: and she and you know, she was trying to be

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Speaker 1: strong for me, but she couldn't cry. But um but

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Speaker 1: she saw of course she was, of course because I

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Speaker 1: was crying. But I ended up hearing her sob over

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Speaker 1: like in another room and um and it's like so

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Speaker 1: so it's yeah, it was just so crazy for me. Um.

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Speaker 1: So of course that's when like all the doctor appointments happened,

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Speaker 1: like what I mean, back to back, Like so I

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Speaker 1: go to the next day, I go meet over my

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Speaker 1: pizza tee and she was like, okay, um, we need

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Speaker 1: to do a cat scan. I'll tell you this. God

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Speaker 1: was all over my whole thing, the whole entire time.

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Speaker 1: Despact the fact that I was being told this, like

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Speaker 1: I was now looking back and it's like no, God

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Speaker 1: had his handle whole time, just like I live like

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Speaker 1: every time anyway, So I have to She was like,

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Speaker 1: you need to get a CT scan. I was like

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Speaker 1: what why. She was like, we need to know if

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Speaker 1: the campus sprint. I don't want to hear stuff like this.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to hear it, right, what do you

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Speaker 1: mean if the campus sprint? It seems like since you

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Speaker 1: found out, it was just everything became so sudden. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it was just like I mean, but then the game,

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Speaker 1: it's like, you do you really have the time to

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Speaker 1: like it so gay? You know it? Yeah, It's like

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Speaker 1: I didn't during the day. This is this is my

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Speaker 1: life on during the day. During the day I had

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Speaker 1: no time to let it sink it because I was

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Speaker 1: too busy trying to figure out what was going on

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Speaker 1: with me. At night or when I was by myself,

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Speaker 1: I couldn't think about anything else. That was so summer

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Speaker 1: two thousand and fourteen was probably the busiest summer because

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Speaker 1: I was always out because it was a distraction. So

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Speaker 1: you was so you was going out, and like I was,

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Speaker 1: I was wanted to be that person to say like

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Speaker 1: I'm not going anywhere, like I can't face other like

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Speaker 1: no one knows. I can't face other people when they

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Speaker 1: don't know, like like I got this going on. I

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Speaker 1: took my best friend and I was just like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god. And again this is another reason why I

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Speaker 1: could not tell the people. I went called my one

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Speaker 1: of my best friends and I'm telling her this and

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Speaker 1: she starts crying. At this point, I already had did

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Speaker 1: by crying because I'm just look at well, like i

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Speaker 1: don't really care about anything else right now. I'm just

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Speaker 1: trying to get well. So she's crying, and then she was,

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Speaker 1: and then I was. I was like, I don't want

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Speaker 1: to go out, and she's like, no, bitch, we're going out.

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Speaker 1: Like I was just all right, okay. She's like, you

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Speaker 1: ain't dead, and I was like, you know what, You're right.

325
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Speaker 1: So at that point, maybe three people knew my sister,

326
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Speaker 1: uh and my two best friends, and mind you, that summer,

327
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Speaker 1: my my other best friend moved to Atlanta and I

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00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:51,640
Speaker 1: was and so she called me, like, do you need

329
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Speaker 1: me to move back up? I was like, no, no,

330
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Speaker 1: you can stay right there. You can stay right there

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Speaker 1: where you are. And so my best friends taking me out,

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Speaker 1: one of my best friends, she's taking me out, taking

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00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:06,320
Speaker 1: me out, and I'm literally out at barbecues, talking to people,

334
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:10,520
Speaker 1: you know, out at functions, at the clubs. I'm talking

335
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:18,840
Speaker 1: to people. And this is the summer of y'all move

336
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:23,000
Speaker 1: that dough or like I think when I hear those songs,

337
00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:27,600
Speaker 1: I automatically I can imagine yep, but you probably get

338
00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:32,440
Speaker 1: like kind of stuck. Stuck is in like like when

339
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:35,240
Speaker 1: I hear certain songs and it reminds me of certain

340
00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:38,560
Speaker 1: moments of people or certain events that happen in my life,

341
00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:41,679
Speaker 1: especially when it has a certain connotation with it, I

342
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:46,040
Speaker 1: just get stuck because I see myself. I see myself

343
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:49,919
Speaker 1: in the past when that song was playing, depending on

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Speaker 1: what it is, because I feel like because I was delivered,

345
00:20:53,359 --> 00:21:01,000
Speaker 1: I was like for me, I'm like uh like like right,

346
00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:03,640
Speaker 1: like I went through that's look where I'm at now.

347
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:07,879
Speaker 1: I beat it. I listened to those songs like I

348
00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:09,800
Speaker 1: listened to those songs, and I automatically think of the

349
00:21:09,840 --> 00:21:13,119
Speaker 1: time I was out while I was sick, like it

350
00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:17,560
Speaker 1: doesn't fail um drunken love like drunken love that summer

351
00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:19,120
Speaker 1: that they were killing it, I was in the cloth

352
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,879
Speaker 1: and I remember that because I was out for my

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Speaker 1: friend's birthday. We didn't they didn't find out until the

354
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,920
Speaker 1: week after because I ended up making it public. But anyway,

355
00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:29,520
Speaker 1: going back to UM, a CT scan. So I did

356
00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:33,040
Speaker 1: the c CT scan and UM, I go to this

357
00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:37,840
Speaker 1: hospital that's usually known UM for treating trauma. That's where

358
00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:41,400
Speaker 1: I actually got my had my cornostery. Went over there.

359
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:44,760
Speaker 1: I was just like this jankie as hospital like, why

360
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:52,480
Speaker 1: am I Why are you calling Jankie? Jankie like, I'll

361
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:54,240
Speaker 1: tell you watch people other duty. So I go to

362
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:57,400
Speaker 1: see the scans and they did the scan blah blah

363
00:21:57,400 --> 00:22:00,679
Speaker 1: blah um, and then they said go to a PCP.

364
00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:04,239
Speaker 1: That same week I went over. They was just like,

365
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,480
Speaker 1: we can't find they can't find your documents. I was like,

366
00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:09,920
Speaker 1: why can't you find my documents? I did scan. They

367
00:22:09,920 --> 00:22:12,040
Speaker 1: were like, we can't find your documents. The reason why

368
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,359
Speaker 1: they couldn't find my documents is because they spelled one

369
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:20,240
Speaker 1: letter wrong after I confirmed, so what I can't And

370
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:22,480
Speaker 1: so the reason why my sister says I'm bout is

371
00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,919
Speaker 1: because that same day that I went in for my

372
00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:28,159
Speaker 1: ct SKY and the doors there at work, and I

373
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 1: was just like, oh, hell no, So I'm going to

374
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Speaker 1: a hospital with a door. If that would me, If

375
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:35,280
Speaker 1: that wouldn't be me, I would have been thinking like,

376
00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:40,360
Speaker 1: oh my god, like look I was. I was just like, no,

377
00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:43,520
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm going. So I ended up going to

378
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:46,480
Speaker 1: one of them. I was like, after those doors didn't

379
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:49,879
Speaker 1: work and they lost my names, my my name, I

380
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:52,479
Speaker 1: was like, I'm going to ask for my my PCP

381
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:55,080
Speaker 1: for a referral for one of the top camp and

382
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:59,880
Speaker 1: hospitals in the in in the US, and it's right

383
00:23:00,359 --> 00:23:02,560
Speaker 1: is not too far from the un I was like,

384
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:08,640
Speaker 1: I need a referral. Now, girl, the original hospital after

385
00:23:08,760 --> 00:23:11,199
Speaker 1: I found that I was sick, was talking about now

386
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:13,960
Speaker 1: uses July. They were talking about okay, so our next

387
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:21,600
Speaker 1: appointments in September. Nah, so you tell me in July

388
00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:24,720
Speaker 1: I'm diagnosed with cancer, But do you want me to

389
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:31,960
Speaker 1: come back for a follow up in September? Wrong with people? You?

390
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:34,880
Speaker 1: I don't do it? Mind you. When when I made

391
00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:38,000
Speaker 1: that decision to go to the other hospital, the hospital

392
00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:40,040
Speaker 1: saved my life because the minute I went to the hospital,

393
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,280
Speaker 1: it was like boom boom boom boom boom boom boom

394
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:46,679
Speaker 1: boom check check check, But wait, and were you in pain?

395
00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:52,080
Speaker 1: There's no pain. Remember I didn't know. I had no

396
00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:56,199
Speaker 1: idea I was sick, and so I had to go

397
00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:59,080
Speaker 1: to the hospital to find out maybe I'm not really sick,

398
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,360
Speaker 1: maybe getting me get a second opinion. When the hospital

399
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:04,520
Speaker 1: told me, oh, no, you have it, I was like,

400
00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:08,000
Speaker 1: oh ship, okay, so what we're doing now? There was

401
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:13,000
Speaker 1: like we got your CT skin results. It shows that

402
00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:15,480
Speaker 1: the cancer did not spread that I was like, Oh

403
00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:18,159
Speaker 1: my gosh, that's why you God, God was with me

404
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,680
Speaker 1: this whole time. Then they were like, we need another test.

405
00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:26,680
Speaker 1: I literally I was in the hospital maybe every day then,

406
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:32,080
Speaker 1: So between July September, I was in a hospital almost

407
00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:35,040
Speaker 1: every day. So at that point I was like I

408
00:24:35,119 --> 00:24:39,640
Speaker 1: was kind of like desensitized to um testing needles and

409
00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:42,000
Speaker 1: stuff like that because I was getting it like every day.

410
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:43,399
Speaker 1: It was to the point where I was just like,

411
00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:45,320
Speaker 1: do you need to draw my blood today? You just

412
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:48,040
Speaker 1: got it yesterday, Like I don't don't. Like it was

413
00:24:48,119 --> 00:24:51,240
Speaker 1: so weird, Like I was just like I don't want

414
00:24:51,280 --> 00:24:54,560
Speaker 1: to be here um going to these doctors because it

415
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:56,080
Speaker 1: was like, we don't know if you could do chemo,

416
00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:58,280
Speaker 1: we don't know if we could do radiation. Yet we

417
00:24:58,359 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 1: don't know where, like he has this spread wheat, so

418
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 1: right now you need to do with endoscopy. For those

419
00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:06,680
Speaker 1: who don't know what the endoscopy is, what it's like,

420
00:25:07,119 --> 00:25:10,199
Speaker 1: let me see, it's a it's the scope of the

421
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:15,800
Speaker 1: it's it's similar to a lower endoscopy. So they just

422
00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:19,879
Speaker 1: basically want to get um. Oh. The whole time I'm talking,

423
00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:22,640
Speaker 1: I never specifically told what kind of cancer I had.

424
00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:26,560
Speaker 1: I had colorecto, so it was colorectal cancer. So it

425
00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:29,600
Speaker 1: was the cancer was at the very end of my colon,

426
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 1: to the point where it's at the very part of

427
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:36,440
Speaker 1: my rectum. Oh my god, you didn't even have colon cancer.

428
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:39,000
Speaker 1: It was corecto, Like it was right at the very

429
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:41,840
Speaker 1: tip of my ass, Like legit. Now, is that a

430
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:49,480
Speaker 1: very rare cancer to have? I don't think so. Now.

431
00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:53,520
Speaker 1: I think it's rare for my age. Oh right, yeah,

432
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,800
Speaker 1: So I think that's because even when I walked in

433
00:25:57,359 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 1: to the hospitals and they will read my um read

434
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:04,040
Speaker 1: my file. The doctor was just like, wow, you're young,

435
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:07,000
Speaker 1: and I was just like no, ship Like, I'm just

436
00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:11,359
Speaker 1: like yeah, so, but is this the same that you

437
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:13,320
Speaker 1: have the same I'm young. I don't get it. Just

438
00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:16,040
Speaker 1: you know, get this out of me. Did your brother

439
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:18,040
Speaker 1: have the same type of cancer or did he actually

440
00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:23,439
Speaker 1: have coling colon cancer? They never specified specified, but it

441
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:29,040
Speaker 1: was just colon um hm and so um oh yeah.

442
00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:31,720
Speaker 1: So they said like that, we're gonna do a little endosophy.

443
00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:34,960
Speaker 1: So they basically want to see how deep the cancer

444
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:39,600
Speaker 1: was in my colon if they could um, if they

445
00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:44,359
Speaker 1: wanted to do a resection of my colon, which is

446
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:47,600
Speaker 1: basically to cut a piece of my colon or for

447
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:50,640
Speaker 1: me to have an um an as to me bag,

448
00:26:50,720 --> 00:26:53,199
Speaker 1: which is a bag for me the poop out of

449
00:26:53,359 --> 00:26:57,840
Speaker 1: full the rest of my life. So basically what no colon,

450
00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:01,480
Speaker 1: take it all out? But wait at this point, did

451
00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:06,120
Speaker 1: you tell your parents ship? Oh? Yeah, I forgot they

452
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:10,120
Speaker 1: because I'm like, girl, you were doing this. They didn't

453
00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:14,879
Speaker 1: know about the CD, but they were around for the endoscopy. Okay,

454
00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:18,680
Speaker 1: wait a minute, hold on, yeah, they were around for

455
00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,360
Speaker 1: the end so let me backtrack for a second. They

456
00:27:21,359 --> 00:27:25,959
Speaker 1: come back from from um wherever they came from, and

457
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:31,920
Speaker 1: I was what I mean, ship in bricks just to

458
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:37,320
Speaker 1: tell them, and I was, I just I didn't know.

459
00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:39,919
Speaker 1: I was like, okay, guys, I have to like my

460
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:42,360
Speaker 1: sister was making fun of me, and I thank god

461
00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:44,960
Speaker 1: from my family because we're a bunch of jokesters on

462
00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:48,640
Speaker 1: all we do is like jokes. Because it wasn't for them, Like,

463
00:27:48,680 --> 00:27:51,840
Speaker 1: if it wasn't for my sister, I kid you not,

464
00:27:52,040 --> 00:27:55,360
Speaker 1: I probably would be like devastated because all we did

465
00:27:55,359 --> 00:27:57,520
Speaker 1: was crack jokes and other people were looking from outside

466
00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:00,360
Speaker 1: looking in probably was like this is very sensitive thing.

467
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:03,200
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, it is, but girl, we were

468
00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:05,280
Speaker 1: just we were just cracking jokes the whole time. And

469
00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:06,879
Speaker 1: I know it's at the expense of my health, but

470
00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:10,240
Speaker 1: we were just cracking jokes. So my sisters cracking jokes

471
00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:12,600
Speaker 1: at me. But that probably also help you, like get

472
00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:19,440
Speaker 1: definitely helped me right at jo It's like, funny, I've

473
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:21,760
Speaker 1: never seen you look so nervous in my life. She

474
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:29,600
Speaker 1: was like every time, like it was like and it

475
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:31,840
Speaker 1: was like my parents just talking about stuff that was

476
00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:33,919
Speaker 1: similar to it. And they were like talking about how

477
00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:36,160
Speaker 1: they they where they were in the old country, like

478
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:38,640
Speaker 1: oh that country. It was like, oh yeah, so so

479
00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:43,120
Speaker 1: died stomach cancer and I'm over here to Ship and

480
00:28:43,160 --> 00:28:45,200
Speaker 1: Brice because I'm just like, I can't tell him now,

481
00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 1: I can't tell them, and so she's like dying laughing.

482
00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:52,360
Speaker 1: But um, I eventually tell them and my parents were

483
00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:56,960
Speaker 1: surprisingly I thought they would have break down and cry. Um.

484
00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,760
Speaker 1: And my father said that one of the like dopest

485
00:28:59,760 --> 00:29:01,960
Speaker 1: things that I was actually surprised because he took my

486
00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:07,200
Speaker 1: brother's death so hard. I'm going nowhere, You're too strong

487
00:29:07,280 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 1: for this, That's what he said to me. M m okay.

488
00:29:12,480 --> 00:29:15,440
Speaker 1: Well that was easy, and I mean, yeah, I can

489
00:29:15,520 --> 00:29:18,320
Speaker 1: just only imagine how that. I mean, anybody dying and

490
00:29:19,320 --> 00:29:23,600
Speaker 1: it's very um unfortunate. But to have somebody passed away

491
00:29:23,640 --> 00:29:27,160
Speaker 1: at such a a young age, like twenty five and

492
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:31,320
Speaker 1: then it passed away to cold encounter five like that's

493
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:38,600
Speaker 1: it's crazy, you know. Yeah, so it's like so my

494
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:41,320
Speaker 1: players said, just what's crazy with it? I think it

495
00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:44,960
Speaker 1: was also funny because as being West Indian, they were

496
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:51,200
Speaker 1: trying to cure my cancer with tea. I get this

497
00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:54,120
Speaker 1: damn tree away from my mouth, like I don't want

498
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:57,960
Speaker 1: to have anything to do with it. They I think

499
00:29:57,960 --> 00:30:01,440
Speaker 1: it's cute though, but was like, this is not gonna

500
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:04,680
Speaker 1: help me. But anyway, so I going for it. Inoscer

501
00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:08,640
Speaker 1: me and the inosc is basically just to see the

502
00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:13,760
Speaker 1: measure how deep the cancer is in my colony. God

503
00:30:13,840 --> 00:30:15,880
Speaker 1: came through. I woke up in the middle of that too,

504
00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 1: like I was just like, what the hell? I feel

505
00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:19,440
Speaker 1: like God was telling me to wake up in the

506
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:22,320
Speaker 1: middle of it just so I can see, like like

507
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,760
Speaker 1: just to see like his glory. I kid you not,

508
00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:28,720
Speaker 1: but anyway, so he um, I wake up in the

509
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:32,680
Speaker 1: middle of it, and the doctors are like excited and

510
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:36,080
Speaker 1: they were like, oh my gosh, it's superficial. And they

511
00:30:36,120 --> 00:30:37,480
Speaker 1: were like and I was like, what the hell does

512
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:40,520
Speaker 1: that mean? That cancer was sitting pretty right on top

513
00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:43,120
Speaker 1: of the colon. It didn't get through the colon, it

514
00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:45,440
Speaker 1: was just sitting right on top of it. So basically

515
00:30:46,080 --> 00:30:49,720
Speaker 1: it's it was like they were just like we could

516
00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:56,520
Speaker 1: remove this like easy and so um. Like basically they

517
00:30:57,120 --> 00:31:00,440
Speaker 1: that appointment was going to determine if I was going

518
00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:05,160
Speaker 1: to do chemo or radiation, but even what was the

519
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:08,160
Speaker 1: alcohol did you do either? Because well I didn't find

520
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:11,560
Speaker 1: out until after the whole thing ended up because I

521
00:31:11,640 --> 00:31:13,920
Speaker 1: they still were like I'm not sure, man, you might

522
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:16,320
Speaker 1: have to do chemo and radiations. And I was just like,

523
00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:20,240
Speaker 1: well they saying it was superficial, They're like yeah, but

524
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:24,320
Speaker 1: we still don't know. And I understand it because the

525
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:26,600
Speaker 1: thing is that like again, like the hospital I ended

526
00:31:26,680 --> 00:31:30,280
Speaker 1: up transferring over to what I mean, like all they

527
00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:33,840
Speaker 1: do is do cancer research like that's they're they're known

528
00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:36,720
Speaker 1: for cancer that whole so I get it. They just

529
00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:40,760
Speaker 1: want to make sure that it's all gone. Um oh yeah.

530
00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 1: And by that time, I had cut my hair because

531
00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:46,080
Speaker 1: I was like, well, since it's all gonna be off anyway.

532
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:49,880
Speaker 1: So you did a short time. You were surferring yourself,

533
00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:51,720
Speaker 1: and I was at myself mentally, I was just like, okay,

534
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:54,400
Speaker 1: let me go short mind beol was natural all this year,

535
00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:57,880
Speaker 1: all these years, had long year and everything. Um granted

536
00:31:57,880 --> 00:32:00,560
Speaker 1: that war a good weed, but that's nobody's business but mine.

537
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:05,400
Speaker 1: But but I had hair, and yeah, I cut it.

538
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:08,520
Speaker 1: I put, I stopped the trap. I slopped creamy cracker

539
00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:10,480
Speaker 1: on there. I was just like, well, I might as

540
00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:12,880
Speaker 1: well be cute through this process. For those of you

541
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:21,360
Speaker 1: who don't know what creamy crack is before leading up

542
00:32:21,360 --> 00:32:25,520
Speaker 1: to the surgery, like, what was the thing that you

543
00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:28,400
Speaker 1: have to do to prepare for the surgery? And then

544
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:30,400
Speaker 1: they so did you ever have to go through chemo

545
00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:36,000
Speaker 1: and radiation too? So for surgery. I didn't know exactly

546
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,600
Speaker 1: what was going to happen just yet, because after I

547
00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:41,719
Speaker 1: found out that it didn't, it was superficial. I had

548
00:32:41,760 --> 00:32:46,719
Speaker 1: another point of my oncologist oncologies as adopted that specifically, uh,

549
00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:51,320
Speaker 1: there's there's specialized in blood um so for my oncolloges

550
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:55,720
Speaker 1: and she was like, okay, um, you have type one

551
00:32:55,840 --> 00:32:57,640
Speaker 1: T two cancer. I was like, what the hell is

552
00:32:57,680 --> 00:32:59,320
Speaker 1: the T two. I don't know whether this field is

553
00:32:59,360 --> 00:33:02,160
Speaker 1: that to this they were like type one T two.

554
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:08,200
Speaker 1: They basically said that you your candy was touched so

555
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:12,160
Speaker 1: early that it didn't affect your like it didn't infect

556
00:33:12,160 --> 00:33:16,520
Speaker 1: your health. Okay. And because they already knew that at

557
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:19,160
Speaker 1: that time, because we became best friend, because I was

558
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 1: at the hospital like almost every day, so I was like,

559
00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:24,520
Speaker 1: I gotta go to the gym. I was just like,

560
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:26,640
Speaker 1: I'm trying to go to the gym, and the gym

561
00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:30,560
Speaker 1: was my um my stress relief. So yeah, even the

562
00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:32,280
Speaker 1: same day I found out I was diagnosed, I went

563
00:33:32,320 --> 00:33:34,760
Speaker 1: to the gym. Same day I went and got the

564
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:37,520
Speaker 1: CT scamp. I went to the gym, like I was like,

565
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:40,640
Speaker 1: I was always at the gym and so um, I'd

566
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:42,360
Speaker 1: say they knew about it because I was running ten.

567
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:46,400
Speaker 1: I was running inside Kay's every every every um every

568
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:50,120
Speaker 1: week or so You're like very actively, very like. Even

569
00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:54,600
Speaker 1: so the doctors were just like, yo, you put me

570
00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:58,680
Speaker 1: the shame and um and they said to me legit.

571
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:03,480
Speaker 1: They were just like, we strongly believe this cancer. Looking

572
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:07,000
Speaker 1: at this cancers cancer was probably developing in your two

573
00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:11,919
Speaker 1: years two freaking years. I'm like, wow, and two years

574
00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:14,840
Speaker 1: prior was when I started my weight off journey was crazy,

575
00:34:15,560 --> 00:34:17,759
Speaker 1: and they said, we probably are going to say that

576
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 1: we accredit your healthy lifestyle for it to slow down

577
00:34:21,120 --> 00:34:23,640
Speaker 1: because of how you ate and how you take care

578
00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:26,279
Speaker 1: of yourself. He was fighting and didn't know he was

579
00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:29,120
Speaker 1: cleaning up a good fight. I was fighting something. I

580
00:34:29,160 --> 00:34:34,440
Speaker 1: don't even know I was fighting. I was like what

581
00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 1: so that. I was just like, so, do I have

582
00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:38,279
Speaker 1: to do chemo? They were like, we still don't know.

583
00:34:38,400 --> 00:34:42,120
Speaker 1: We are going to book you out for a for

584
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:47,680
Speaker 1: surgery in September. At this point, we were in August,

585
00:34:47,880 --> 00:34:50,480
Speaker 1: so basically I probably was like maybe three weeks out

586
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:56,520
Speaker 1: before surgery and so um so I said okay. There

587
00:34:56,600 --> 00:35:00,279
Speaker 1: was like, we it's really too early to say. We

588
00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:02,239
Speaker 1: need to make sure that this cancer does not come back.

589
00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:06,200
Speaker 1: And it's sad to say, but we're also thinking about

590
00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:08,480
Speaker 1: an ascim me back because you are very young and

591
00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:10,040
Speaker 1: we don't want this cancer to come back. So the

592
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:13,360
Speaker 1: anst me back's basically a bag that I would have

593
00:35:13,400 --> 00:35:16,239
Speaker 1: attached to my abdomen for the rest of my life

594
00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 1: where because I don't where would I put I wouldn't

595
00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:20,840
Speaker 1: be pulling out my my ass anymore, I really be.

596
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:24,560
Speaker 1: The waste would be developed, like like collected in this

597
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:28,480
Speaker 1: bag at my as for the rest of my life.

598
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:31,480
Speaker 1: And I'm only twenty nine. So I'm just like, I

599
00:35:31,520 --> 00:35:33,160
Speaker 1: don't want to hear this. But the whole time I'm

600
00:35:33,160 --> 00:35:35,280
Speaker 1: over here pleading the name of Jesus, like the blood

601
00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 1: of Jesus, Like, oh no, I'm not I'm not getting

602
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:42,239
Speaker 1: a bag, Like well, this is a possible. I said,

603
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:47,359
Speaker 1: I'm not getting a bag. I'm not anyone right at

604
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:50,120
Speaker 1: that point because I already knew at this point the

605
00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:55,759
Speaker 1: cancer was type one uh T two and that um

606
00:35:55,920 --> 00:35:58,840
Speaker 1: that I will be having surgery. Because I had built

607
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:02,520
Speaker 1: my whole brand and at that time dedicated to my health,

608
00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:05,719
Speaker 1: I had to tell people. So I went ahead and

609
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:10,080
Speaker 1: told friends, not my like my best, but I had

610
00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:11,879
Speaker 1: to go tell my other friends that were close enough

611
00:36:11,920 --> 00:36:15,799
Speaker 1: for me to tell. I told them for um and

612
00:36:15,840 --> 00:36:19,600
Speaker 1: then I went ahead and made a post online about it.

613
00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:24,560
Speaker 1: I made this whole post, and throughout the whole post,

614
00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:26,520
Speaker 1: God was in that like I was just like, my

615
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:28,960
Speaker 1: purpose has not been fulfilled yet, so it's just like

616
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:31,680
Speaker 1: I ain't go nowhere. I was. And one of the

617
00:36:31,719 --> 00:36:33,759
Speaker 1: things that really got me through was the fact that

618
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,560
Speaker 1: after I was told I was sick, and after I

619
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:39,360
Speaker 1: did my crying, after the late nights up and everything

620
00:36:39,400 --> 00:36:41,920
Speaker 1: like that, what really got me through was me looking

621
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:43,560
Speaker 1: in the mirror and looking at myself and I was

622
00:36:43,640 --> 00:36:45,640
Speaker 1: like a couple of like, you know, a couple of

623
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:49,480
Speaker 1: weeks ago, a month ago, before I was sick, I

624
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:51,640
Speaker 1: still look the same, like I was just like, so

625
00:36:51,719 --> 00:36:53,440
Speaker 1: that means I'm still funn of. So I was just like,

626
00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:56,200
Speaker 1: I don't want to lose myself. So I think my

627
00:36:56,360 --> 00:37:00,120
Speaker 1: mental really helped me a lot um in regard to

628
00:37:00,239 --> 00:37:04,280
Speaker 1: me getting through all of this. So I posted online

629
00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:09,200
Speaker 1: and and I was I posted everything online. Literally, I

630
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:11,560
Speaker 1: had people call me talking about that they had issues

631
00:37:12,239 --> 00:37:15,640
Speaker 1: with their own colon and then they were afraid of

632
00:37:15,760 --> 00:37:17,760
Speaker 1: set sharing it with other people, or they were afraid

633
00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:20,839
Speaker 1: to get tested. They went and got tested. A lot

634
00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:22,799
Speaker 1: of people ended up hitting me up talking about like

635
00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:26,440
Speaker 1: my faith has made them faith more faithful because they

636
00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:29,239
Speaker 1: don't understand as to how something like this can happen

637
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:35,920
Speaker 1: to someone and still have the like the ability is

638
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,680
Speaker 1: still going on. People were so shocked because they were

639
00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:40,600
Speaker 1: just like we just went out together like we were

640
00:37:40,640 --> 00:37:43,120
Speaker 1: just out. We just went out like we just celebrated.

641
00:37:43,640 --> 00:37:46,359
Speaker 1: Like but you know, I always tell people it's very

642
00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:50,160
Speaker 1: important to like share your stories because you just never

643
00:37:50,239 --> 00:37:52,920
Speaker 1: know who you can help in the long run, Like

644
00:37:53,640 --> 00:37:55,959
Speaker 1: a are you sharing your story? Like you were able

645
00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:58,440
Speaker 1: to help people increase their faith in God? You know,

646
00:37:59,040 --> 00:38:01,080
Speaker 1: because you didn't look like your story you were still

647
00:38:01,120 --> 00:38:03,839
Speaker 1: doing any thing. He was still um doing what you

648
00:38:03,840 --> 00:38:08,560
Speaker 1: have to do, and you wasn't like he wasn't looking like,

649
00:38:08,680 --> 00:38:12,360
Speaker 1: oh I'm sad, why is this happening to me? You know,

650
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:15,439
Speaker 1: you kept going because I was like I ain't dead,

651
00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:17,919
Speaker 1: like and I think I think God from my friend

652
00:38:17,960 --> 00:38:20,240
Speaker 1: who was just like girls, we're coming out, we're going out.

653
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:24,080
Speaker 1: And because of that, it's just like yeah said as

654
00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:26,719
Speaker 1: a distraction, but it was just a reminder that I

655
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:29,520
Speaker 1: ain't dead and gone yet, like I still I guess

656
00:38:29,520 --> 00:38:31,520
Speaker 1: I still got things to do. And I also had

657
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:34,359
Speaker 1: to think about because I was like, my purpose has

658
00:38:34,360 --> 00:38:36,799
Speaker 1: not been fulfilled yet, because I was like I need

659
00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:41,080
Speaker 1: to fulfilled anything yet I think fulfilled, but um, now

660
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 1: I understand that my testim when he doesn't belong to me.

661
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:46,240
Speaker 1: And it was just like now I now I share

662
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:50,520
Speaker 1: about us, share it UM. But I also believe that

663
00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:54,399
Speaker 1: I was used as an instrument with with my diagnosis.

664
00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:58,440
Speaker 1: Uh in regards to like other people seeing me and

665
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:03,279
Speaker 1: seeing how ill with it and and and I kid

666
00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:05,279
Speaker 1: you not, let's people who have to go through way

667
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:10,799
Speaker 1: worse than I had to UM. And I mean, let's

668
00:39:10,840 --> 00:39:13,520
Speaker 1: always tell people it isn't always be a lot worse. Man, Yeah,

669
00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:15,600
Speaker 1: it could always be a lot worse because I didn't

670
00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:18,440
Speaker 1: have I got great like gave me his ability to

671
00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:22,320
Speaker 1: like not have to go through chemo and radiology. And

672
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:25,279
Speaker 1: it was like after my surgery, I wasn't I wasn't

673
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:29,520
Speaker 1: patient in the I was in the hospital for a

674
00:39:29,520 --> 00:39:32,560
Speaker 1: whole week because I couldn't and it would not release

675
00:39:32,560 --> 00:39:35,080
Speaker 1: me until I actually defecated. Like they was just like

676
00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:39,120
Speaker 1: you can't leave for a week after the surgery. I

677
00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:43,279
Speaker 1: could not. There was like sadly until because you need

678
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:46,279
Speaker 1: to make sure that you're coming works. So when once

679
00:39:46,280 --> 00:39:47,840
Speaker 1: you took a poop, how did that feel? Not to

680
00:39:47,880 --> 00:39:51,400
Speaker 1: be graphic or anything, but I cried because I was

681
00:39:51,440 --> 00:39:55,120
Speaker 1: so happy. I was like, wow, I was so happy,

682
00:39:55,239 --> 00:39:57,799
Speaker 1: and mind you, I'm saying this my experience of the

683
00:39:57,800 --> 00:40:04,160
Speaker 1: hospital was lit. I was first of all, probably a

684
00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:06,680
Speaker 1: day before the hospital, the two days before the three

685
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:12,040
Speaker 1: maybe like my surgery was Tuesday. Um, that's Friday. I

686
00:40:12,120 --> 00:40:15,799
Speaker 1: go in for my final appointment and it was like, okay, man,

687
00:40:15,960 --> 00:40:18,080
Speaker 1: you have to market where we where you want the

688
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:20,320
Speaker 1: awesome me back. I was like, I'd rather not because

689
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:24,040
Speaker 1: I'm not anyone. Yeah, we're not speaking that ship to existence.

690
00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:27,920
Speaker 1: You're gonna get this at my sister and I was like,

691
00:40:28,040 --> 00:40:30,799
Speaker 1: I know this is uncomfortable for you, but you have

692
00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:33,520
Speaker 1: to market. And I was just like, ah, so I'm

693
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:36,600
Speaker 1: market it right on my right side, market it right

694
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:40,000
Speaker 1: there with like in me. Just marketing it just brought

695
00:40:40,040 --> 00:40:42,480
Speaker 1: me this, like in the whole depression. Like I was

696
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:44,239
Speaker 1: just like I don't want to market it because I'm

697
00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:49,200
Speaker 1: not getting one. But anyway, so, um, they're talking to me,

698
00:40:49,719 --> 00:40:51,799
Speaker 1: so I'm like, okay, they tell me you can't eat this,

699
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:54,400
Speaker 1: you can't eat that. Get ready. So that whole process

700
00:40:54,440 --> 00:40:56,239
Speaker 1: I talked to you about earlier, about that big tub

701
00:40:56,320 --> 00:41:00,840
Speaker 1: I gotta take it again. I was like, oh my goodness,

702
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:05,080
Speaker 1: I'm so over this. I'm so over it. But what's

703
00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:08,720
Speaker 1: crazy is that I booked the photo shoot two days

704
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:15,000
Speaker 1: before I did my eyelashes on that that Saturday, I

705
00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:17,680
Speaker 1: had my photo shoot on Sunday. I don't even know

706
00:41:17,719 --> 00:41:19,080
Speaker 1: why I did the photo shoot, honestly, I was just

707
00:41:19,120 --> 00:41:21,200
Speaker 1: like I want to photo you, but you know what,

708
00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:23,239
Speaker 1: you have to do things. I'm gonna make you feel good,

709
00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 1: regardless of what the circumstances is. Like, it's just gonna

710
00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:28,359
Speaker 1: make you feel good about something before you step into

711
00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 1: something that's life changing. Listen, do it. Yeah, so I

712
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:34,160
Speaker 1: did this photo shop. You got my hair cutting everything

713
00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 1: out my lashes, but like, yeah, okay, that might make

714
00:41:39,560 --> 00:41:43,239
Speaker 1: you feel your happiest, but you right right right, hey

715
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:46,160
Speaker 1: mind you. I um also was like, hey, nobody gonna

716
00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:48,360
Speaker 1: come visit me with some dusty ask face, like I

717
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:59,719
Speaker 1: need right and all this is going on in going

718
00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:01,919
Speaker 1: on might be my friends. My friends are all like

719
00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:05,280
Speaker 1: I even had I even had two cancer parties, like

720
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:11,000
Speaker 1: I had camping parties, one at work and the other

721
00:42:11,080 --> 00:42:14,680
Speaker 1: one was like my friends. She was like, um he

722
00:42:15,719 --> 00:42:17,920
Speaker 1: she had an empty house like and so she just

723
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:19,960
Speaker 1: had a party and said a mat to people. It's

724
00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:22,799
Speaker 1: like I'm having a pre surgery party. Come through, like

725
00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:29,880
Speaker 1: I'm oving here in May. People over you know so now,

726
00:42:30,080 --> 00:42:33,080
Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god. Friends did not know

727
00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:35,960
Speaker 1: how to deal. They were super emotional. Might be. All

728
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:41,440
Speaker 1: my girlfriends were just like back, can well do you

729
00:42:41,480 --> 00:42:43,319
Speaker 1: know women can have those things a little way more

730
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:45,560
Speaker 1: better than men anyway, So I like, I keep you.

731
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:48,400
Speaker 1: Not all my male friends they were just like male friends.

732
00:42:48,400 --> 00:42:51,120
Speaker 1: All my guy friends were just like, oh my gosh,

733
00:42:51,160 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 1: like how are you dooing? I was like, can you

734
00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:57,440
Speaker 1: speak like? I was like, can you speak? Like you

735
00:42:57,560 --> 00:43:01,600
Speaker 1: see me here physically attending party, like you know I'm there,

736
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:06,000
Speaker 1: like you know, you know, yes you do know about it. Yes,

737
00:43:06,040 --> 00:43:09,399
Speaker 1: it's horrible, but it's just like many really do deal

738
00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:13,200
Speaker 1: with things. They deal with things different way differently, and

739
00:43:13,280 --> 00:43:16,480
Speaker 1: it's like, Lord Jesus, like when it hits them, yes,

740
00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 1: the like it takes them a longer time for it

741
00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:21,799
Speaker 1: the process, and when it does process, it takes them

742
00:43:21,840 --> 00:43:24,480
Speaker 1: a longer time to get over it. It's just it's

743
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 1: just I gotta baby you just for what's going on

744
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:29,120
Speaker 1: with me, Like I gotta go rub your back because

745
00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:31,960
Speaker 1: of what's going on with me. Like right, it was

746
00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:35,239
Speaker 1: crazy and so um I was dogged up for that.

747
00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:40,120
Speaker 1: Blah blah blah um surgery day comes and my my

748
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:42,920
Speaker 1: very very very one of my very best friends. She's

749
00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:46,759
Speaker 1: he picks me up. She takes her boyfriend's car and

750
00:43:46,840 --> 00:43:48,839
Speaker 1: drops and picks me up at my house at four

751
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:51,000
Speaker 1: o'clock and wanted to bring me to my appointment that's

752
00:43:51,040 --> 00:43:53,280
Speaker 1: gonna I'm supposed to be at the hospital by seven.

753
00:43:54,120 --> 00:43:56,200
Speaker 1: At four o'clock in the morning, she was like breaking

754
00:43:56,239 --> 00:43:59,719
Speaker 1: in Mexico, you guess, just like she brings like some

755
00:44:00,000 --> 00:44:03,520
Speaker 1: heron hat, like she got she's going to Mexico. We

756
00:44:03,560 --> 00:44:05,600
Speaker 1: don't even think about the hospital. We're going to Mexico.

757
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:08,800
Speaker 1: And she's like, you have been lucky, you have your passport.

758
00:44:08,880 --> 00:44:16,400
Speaker 1: And I'm just like, yeah, uh no, what do you

759
00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:19,239
Speaker 1: mean people like that around you? Because i'maging you've got

760
00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:21,719
Speaker 1: people around you. I mean, don't get me wrong, because

761
00:44:21,680 --> 00:44:26,440
Speaker 1: a very sensitive topic and you know, you want to

762
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:28,759
Speaker 1: you need to have people around that's positive, like just

763
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:31,560
Speaker 1: gonna uplift your sperience, Like, yeah, let's go to Mexico,

764
00:44:31,600 --> 00:44:33,879
Speaker 1: because the same we want in Mexico having a good time.

765
00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:36,360
Speaker 1: It's bold than saying I'm going to have surgery removed cancer,

766
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:40,000
Speaker 1: you know, and it really kind of like alleviated some

767
00:44:40,960 --> 00:44:43,680
Speaker 1: butterflies because again this time I'm really going under the

768
00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:47,319
Speaker 1: knife like nice. Like before we're just strobe lights and

769
00:44:47,719 --> 00:44:52,920
Speaker 1: tubes and but this time I'm getting cut out. Like so,

770
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:56,480
Speaker 1: so we're on our way, so yeah, go ahead ahead.

771
00:44:56,480 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 1: So we're on our way. We get there and um,

772
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:03,440
Speaker 1: of course she was like okay. They you know, they say,

773
00:45:03,560 --> 00:45:08,160
Speaker 1: oh yeah, um patient, you know, come through and uh.

774
00:45:08,160 --> 00:45:09,759
Speaker 1: And then she was like, I'll see you on the

775
00:45:09,760 --> 00:45:12,000
Speaker 1: other side in Mexico. I'll have a drink ready for

776
00:45:12,040 --> 00:45:14,600
Speaker 1: you and everything. That's okay. They put me into bed.

777
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:17,880
Speaker 1: They had me count backwards or say my name, like

778
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:20,560
Speaker 1: how do you spell your name? I was like blah

779
00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:23,000
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah. You know, I spell it like

780
00:45:24,120 --> 00:45:26,799
Speaker 1: you know, I almost did too, I know, I know.

781
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:29,160
Speaker 1: I was like, don't spelling. And then all of a

782
00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:32,239
Speaker 1: sudden I was under and I woke up. The very

783
00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:34,160
Speaker 1: first thing, because I all I can hear, was the

784
00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:37,799
Speaker 1: doctor saying that was a success. And the very first

785
00:45:37,840 --> 00:45:40,000
Speaker 1: thing I did was touch my stomach. I didn't care

786
00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:42,480
Speaker 1: about anything else because I was like making sure that

787
00:45:42,480 --> 00:45:45,160
Speaker 1: that bag was not there, and that bag was g

788
00:45:45,480 --> 00:45:51,200
Speaker 1: I was like words. So that was we are now

789
00:45:51,239 --> 00:45:59,560
Speaker 1: in how does it fail to be? But yeah, how

790
00:45:59,560 --> 00:46:04,160
Speaker 1: does it feel to beat cancer? As it's crazy? My

791
00:46:04,239 --> 00:46:09,400
Speaker 1: friends say that it's weird. I think I feel like

792
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:13,120
Speaker 1: my friends view me way different. They're just like, Nigga,

793
00:46:13,200 --> 00:46:16,640
Speaker 1: you just beat this, like you're not even normal because

794
00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:19,520
Speaker 1: it's like we have like out of my friends, I

795
00:46:19,560 --> 00:46:23,719
Speaker 1: don't think I don't think anyone anyone else has like

796
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:29,280
Speaker 1: people have been affected by cancer, but I grew like, um,

797
00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:32,960
Speaker 1: no one has actually had it and beat it, and

798
00:46:33,000 --> 00:46:37,680
Speaker 1: so they're just like, shoot if she like she's invincible,

799
00:46:37,719 --> 00:46:39,800
Speaker 1: like nothing can touch her. And I was just like,

800
00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:43,120
Speaker 1: don't say things like that, Like, but you know, I

801
00:46:43,520 --> 00:46:48,000
Speaker 1: will say that Canton did birth something out of me

802
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:52,879
Speaker 1: that didn't have before. I always been a smart mouth,

803
00:46:53,600 --> 00:46:56,440
Speaker 1: but for me, I feel like there's there's a boldness

804
00:46:56,520 --> 00:46:58,839
Speaker 1: that supports that smart Also, now no one can say

805
00:46:58,880 --> 00:47:02,440
Speaker 1: nothing to me, but but there's a there was. It

806
00:47:02,600 --> 00:47:05,200
Speaker 1: was like a form of timidity that I had that

807
00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:07,560
Speaker 1: I didn't want to say things in the fear of

808
00:47:07,280 --> 00:47:10,919
Speaker 1: offending anyone. But now I'm just like, no, you're gonna

809
00:47:10,960 --> 00:47:14,080
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say it. I'm not gonna hold no holds bars.

810
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:19,160
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say everything. I gotta say, um, my worship

811
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:21,879
Speaker 1: has been bolder. My worship has been like Super Bowl

812
00:47:21,880 --> 00:47:24,000
Speaker 1: like to a point where if I got on the

813
00:47:24,080 --> 00:47:26,279
Speaker 1: mic before cancer, I was like I don't want to

814
00:47:26,280 --> 00:47:28,799
Speaker 1: get on the mike. But now I'm just like, no, um,

815
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:32,000
Speaker 1: I'm gonna saying my praises. People probably gonna listen to this, like,

816
00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:34,720
Speaker 1: oh my god, because I'm normal. Thank you guys. Anyway,

817
00:47:34,760 --> 00:47:41,960
Speaker 1: So yeah, I man, my mom just shitty. It's just

818
00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:46,520
Speaker 1: like but before I was like, um, but anyway, no

819
00:47:47,040 --> 00:47:49,680
Speaker 1: one knows who this is, so I'll get flat anyway.

820
00:47:51,960 --> 00:47:55,719
Speaker 1: But there's like it's like something that burst out of me.

821
00:47:55,760 --> 00:47:57,600
Speaker 1: Like even my guy friend he was like, you know,

822
00:47:57,640 --> 00:47:59,800
Speaker 1: I keep you not since you since you be cancer.

823
00:48:00,239 --> 00:48:05,760
Speaker 1: It's like you have no fear and like did somebody

824
00:48:05,800 --> 00:48:09,920
Speaker 1: else looks from that outside and looking in? That's like

825
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:16,239
Speaker 1: freaking dope. So I look at it that Yeah. And

826
00:48:16,320 --> 00:48:20,440
Speaker 1: the last question, um, because I think your story is

827
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:24,160
Speaker 1: just amazing, Like you know, I'm just so happy for

828
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:27,279
Speaker 1: you and just congratulations. Like you know, I think that

829
00:48:27,400 --> 00:48:29,799
Speaker 1: your story, your whole outlook up on it is just

830
00:48:29,840 --> 00:48:32,400
Speaker 1: completely different because you know, most people would have went

831
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:35,440
Speaker 1: into its sad and you know, the pressed, and but

832
00:48:35,560 --> 00:48:37,960
Speaker 1: you still went out, you still look good, like you

833
00:48:38,040 --> 00:48:40,600
Speaker 1: did not look like your story, you know, even like

834
00:48:40,680 --> 00:48:42,520
Speaker 1: my pictures, Like I would look at pictures and like

835
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:45,480
Speaker 1: I should just post a whole bunch of me and said,

836
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:46,799
Speaker 1: this is what I look at, this is what cancer

837
00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:48,799
Speaker 1: looks like, like this is what I looked like I

838
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:51,520
Speaker 1: was and then And that's so true because when you

839
00:48:51,560 --> 00:48:54,400
Speaker 1: do see pictures of people with cancer, you see, like

840
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:57,960
Speaker 1: you said that, you know, a person with a bald's head,

841
00:48:58,080 --> 00:49:01,000
Speaker 1: somebody that that kind of looks sick like you already

842
00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:05,840
Speaker 1: have a negative connotation when it comes um illness. So

843
00:49:05,960 --> 00:49:08,120
Speaker 1: but with you, it's like you were looking at your best.

844
00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:12,440
Speaker 1: You know, yeah, I have to So what is some

845
00:49:12,560 --> 00:49:15,759
Speaker 1: advice you would give to others who may be going

846
00:49:15,800 --> 00:49:19,880
Speaker 1: through council now, um, who may think they have cancer

847
00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:24,719
Speaker 1: that they're afraid to like go get tested, Like what

848
00:49:24,719 --> 00:49:29,920
Speaker 1: would you say to them? That's it. It's never over

849
00:49:30,000 --> 00:49:33,600
Speaker 1: until it's over. And so it's like you, there are

850
00:49:33,680 --> 00:49:35,520
Speaker 1: times you're gonna feel tired, you don't want to do

851
00:49:35,600 --> 00:49:37,759
Speaker 1: this anymore, blah blah, but at the end of the day,

852
00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:40,640
Speaker 1: it's not over. And I think when I heard that

853
00:49:40,760 --> 00:49:43,360
Speaker 1: news when I was driving, I thought it was over.

854
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:48,359
Speaker 1: And I definitely thought was like, well damn, like, oh,

855
00:49:48,440 --> 00:49:50,759
Speaker 1: like here I go tent nine, I'm about to kick

856
00:49:50,760 --> 00:49:53,399
Speaker 1: the bucket. All I did was get the phone call.

857
00:49:54,040 --> 00:49:56,640
Speaker 1: But I've done so much during that summer two thousand

858
00:49:56,719 --> 00:49:59,560
Speaker 1: fourteen that no one would ever believe that I was

859
00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 1: going through any of that ship what and and and

860
00:50:03,719 --> 00:50:05,959
Speaker 1: I'm looking back, I was just like and I'm now

861
00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:12,120
Speaker 1: that I'm thirty three, I'm like, it's not over. Um,

862
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 1: It's like life. Life still goes on. Like I still

863
00:50:16,640 --> 00:50:18,560
Speaker 1: went to work, although I had to file fm L

864
00:50:18,640 --> 00:50:23,000
Speaker 1: that because I was always out, but I was um

865
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:29,040
Speaker 1: business life didn't stop. But that's also it's a lot

866
00:50:29,040 --> 00:50:31,640
Speaker 1: of things like regardless of campus, like there's gonna be

867
00:50:31,840 --> 00:50:34,600
Speaker 1: bumps that happened in your life. That it's going to

868
00:50:34,680 --> 00:50:37,400
Speaker 1: slow down. What doesn't mean like it's going to stop

869
00:50:38,080 --> 00:50:42,360
Speaker 1: like at all. Sometimes you gotta slow down. I feel

870
00:50:42,360 --> 00:50:47,160
Speaker 1: like it's crazy. I really believe that Guard gave this,

871
00:50:47,880 --> 00:50:49,759
Speaker 1: gave this to me, had me had to go through

872
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:55,919
Speaker 1: this for me to realize like I needed him and

873
00:50:56,880 --> 00:50:59,359
Speaker 1: that I need to slow down because sometimes we're so

874
00:50:59,440 --> 00:51:03,359
Speaker 1: quick and we need to do this this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this,

875
00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:06,160
Speaker 1: and then boom, something happens and now you you can't

876
00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:08,080
Speaker 1: do what you used to do. Not to say that

877
00:51:08,120 --> 00:51:10,479
Speaker 1: you can't, but you can't do it, that you won't,

878
00:51:10,560 --> 00:51:12,480
Speaker 1: you don't have the ability to do it. But it's

879
00:51:12,480 --> 00:51:15,480
Speaker 1: just kind of have our attention or just to see,

880
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:19,479
Speaker 1: you know, um, how our faith is. And I'm really

881
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:23,080
Speaker 1: faith based. Um. You know, I believe in one God,

882
00:51:23,160 --> 00:51:26,399
Speaker 1: one God only. UM. Not everyone's like that, but that's

883
00:51:26,520 --> 00:51:30,120
Speaker 1: me personally, but I honestly do believe that. You know.

884
00:51:30,200 --> 00:51:32,440
Speaker 1: Earlier that year, I said to myself, I prayed to

885
00:51:32,520 --> 00:51:34,759
Speaker 1: him and I said, I need you. I need to

886
00:51:34,760 --> 00:51:36,600
Speaker 1: be in a place where I need you more than

887
00:51:37,440 --> 00:51:41,239
Speaker 1: anything else. In the same year, on New Year's Eve

888
00:51:41,440 --> 00:51:44,920
Speaker 1: on into the new year, on New Year's Day of

889
00:51:44,920 --> 00:51:47,560
Speaker 1: two thousand and fourteen, that's when I made that prayer,

890
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:52,040
Speaker 1: and then that happened. I don't ever remember me needing

891
00:51:52,040 --> 00:51:58,279
Speaker 1: God any other times. Wow. Ever, and so less and

892
00:51:58,400 --> 00:52:04,320
Speaker 1: learn I need to be assistic. Yeah, you know, listen,

893
00:52:04,360 --> 00:52:06,440
Speaker 1: I got a couple of lessons and making sure you'd

894
00:52:06,480 --> 00:52:10,240
Speaker 1: be careful what you asked for sometimes, Uh, you gotta

895
00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:15,400
Speaker 1: be You gotta tell that man what you want, exactly

896
00:52:15,440 --> 00:52:18,359
Speaker 1: what you want specific but yeah, so the lesson would

897
00:52:18,360 --> 00:52:26,479
Speaker 1: be that is never over. It ain't over, it ain't over. Well,

898
00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:29,719
Speaker 1: thank you so much. Um, you already know this is

899
00:52:29,719 --> 00:52:34,120
Speaker 1: gonna be one of my favorite episodes, you know, for

900
00:52:34,239 --> 00:52:36,200
Speaker 1: those I view that's out there listening. If you have

901
00:52:36,280 --> 00:52:39,360
Speaker 1: any questions for our guests, you know, please email me

902
00:52:39,520 --> 00:52:43,960
Speaker 1: at hello at the professional homegirl dot com. Any tips,

903
00:52:44,239 --> 00:52:47,960
Speaker 1: any questions. I'll make sure that my guests get gets

904
00:52:47,960 --> 00:52:51,160
Speaker 1: it to her in a timely manner. And until then,

905
00:52:51,239 --> 00:52:52,320
Speaker 1: y'all Later