1 00:00:02,160 --> 00:00:04,240 Speaker 1: Hey, everyone, welcome back to bet your Happy Hour. I'm 2 00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:06,920 Speaker 1: Joe and I'm Serena, and we are here today with 3 00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:10,440 Speaker 1: our guest, Clayton Eckert said, do I say your last name? Eckert? 4 00:00:10,720 --> 00:00:13,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, now you said it right, Good on you. People 5 00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:14,520 Speaker 2: don't get it right. Yeah. 6 00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:16,200 Speaker 1: I could see well, yeah, I could see that, but 7 00:00:16,280 --> 00:00:18,439 Speaker 1: I've I've heard it before, so I guess that's a 8 00:00:18,440 --> 00:00:21,360 Speaker 1: little uh, it's kind of like a cheap code. Anyways, 9 00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:21,960 Speaker 1: how are you. 10 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:25,120 Speaker 2: I'm good. It's good too. When was did we do this? 11 00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:26,640 Speaker 2: Like three years ago? It was probably the last time 12 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:28,320 Speaker 2: that we hopped on a podcast together. 13 00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:30,880 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's been a while. I actually don't know if 14 00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:34,600 Speaker 3: we've had you on since, like after AFR with you 15 00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:35,520 Speaker 3: and Susie together. 16 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:41,559 Speaker 1: Yeah, we had my first interview with you, Clayton was 17 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:44,720 Speaker 1: on Clickbait, like I want to. 18 00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:46,200 Speaker 3: Say, after Michelle season. 19 00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:50,720 Speaker 1: Probably, no, it was. It was before The Bachelor aired, 20 00:00:51,520 --> 00:00:55,680 Speaker 1: but you had already filmed and you were probably not 21 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:57,200 Speaker 1: in the best headspace. 22 00:00:59,440 --> 00:01:01,760 Speaker 2: Well, I met you guys, and then was in the 23 00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:03,240 Speaker 2: hotel lobby, right we all. 24 00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:07,200 Speaker 3: Had drinks, yes, because we were at Michelle's finale where 25 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,880 Speaker 3: they announced you as the Bachelor. And we all went 26 00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:14,679 Speaker 3: out for drinks after, which was very fun. 27 00:01:14,760 --> 00:01:16,920 Speaker 2: I probably wasn't enjoy to be around, just because I 28 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:20,320 Speaker 2: was really swimming upstream at that point, like really in 29 00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:23,560 Speaker 2: a bad headspace and trying to hold it together. But 30 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:26,240 Speaker 2: I feel like people could still feel my pain. 31 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:31,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like you were. You'd finish filming. There 32 00:01:31,200 --> 00:01:33,959 Speaker 3: was definitely a level of excitement because obviously you've just 33 00:01:33,959 --> 00:01:35,840 Speaker 3: been announced. It was like the start of everything. But 34 00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:39,720 Speaker 3: I remember you were like I'm reading everything and we 35 00:01:39,720 --> 00:01:42,480 Speaker 3: were like, Clayton, don't do it, and You're like, I 36 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:43,480 Speaker 3: have to do it. 37 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,840 Speaker 2: Yeah I did. I don't do it as much, but 38 00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:51,320 Speaker 2: I did because I was a people pleaser. I have 39 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:53,360 Speaker 2: a little bit of a little bit of that in 40 00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:57,240 Speaker 2: me still. But I was searching for answers of how, 41 00:01:57,400 --> 00:02:00,600 Speaker 2: like how I could please everybody. That's what it was 42 00:02:00,680 --> 00:02:02,880 Speaker 2: rooted in. I was like, I'm looking for criticism, but 43 00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:05,960 Speaker 2: constructive criticism, and I want to see what people are 44 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:07,920 Speaker 2: saying and see if I can fix it. And I 45 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:09,600 Speaker 2: guess after about two and a half years that I 46 00:02:09,639 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 2: realized I can't control that. 47 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:15,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, but also so normal, I mean, the internet's commentary 48 00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:19,280 Speaker 3: on you can feel all consuming when it's attitude. 49 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:21,840 Speaker 2: I mean, you guys get it. It feels you go from 50 00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:25,280 Speaker 2: hardly anybody knowing you to like it feels as if 51 00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:29,360 Speaker 2: the world knows you and everyone's talking about your business 52 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:31,840 Speaker 2: and you go out to eat and you get a 53 00:02:32,080 --> 00:02:34,840 Speaker 2: picture taken and it finds its way online. And that 54 00:02:34,880 --> 00:02:37,240 Speaker 2: happened with my dating life post show. I went on 55 00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:40,359 Speaker 2: a date in Kentucky and next thing you know, I'm 56 00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 2: on the JumboTron and then it's posted online. And I mean, 57 00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,560 Speaker 2: you guys get it. It's like it's just a lot 58 00:02:45,639 --> 00:02:48,000 Speaker 2: to basically be like, Okay, now everything I'm doing is 59 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:51,280 Speaker 2: being analyzed, and you know, I want to be portrayed 60 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:53,040 Speaker 2: in a good light. I don't think anybody's just like, hey, 61 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,840 Speaker 2: I want to destroy my reputation. That's like my whole 62 00:02:55,840 --> 00:02:58,520 Speaker 2: goal wasn't mine, but it felt like I was in 63 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:03,680 Speaker 2: jeopardy of doing so. I was like hyper sensitive to 64 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:05,280 Speaker 2: everything that was being said. 65 00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:08,280 Speaker 1: Did you were you aware of any of that before 66 00:03:08,320 --> 00:03:10,400 Speaker 1: going on the show. Did you realize how much of 67 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:13,600 Speaker 1: your privacy was going to be jeopardized by doing this show? 68 00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:17,640 Speaker 2: No? I mean this is where you know some people 69 00:03:17,639 --> 00:03:20,000 Speaker 2: could say that, I mean it was ignorance. I was 70 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:23,240 Speaker 2: based in ignorance a thousand percent. I knew about the 71 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:25,280 Speaker 2: show growing up. I had exces that watched at my 72 00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:28,400 Speaker 2: mom's her favorite show, so I was very aware of 73 00:03:28,520 --> 00:03:31,560 Speaker 2: like how the show, you know. I was aware of 74 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:33,640 Speaker 2: of its presence, but I wasn't aware of like the 75 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:37,240 Speaker 2: ins and outs. And I said to myself when I 76 00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:39,240 Speaker 2: got brought on and then they made me the Bachelor, 77 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:41,080 Speaker 2: I was like, I don't want to talk to anybody 78 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:43,240 Speaker 2: that's went on prior because I don't want to be 79 00:03:43,240 --> 00:03:47,520 Speaker 2: influenced in theory that would like that sounded good. I 80 00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:49,240 Speaker 2: was like, I want to just be myself, so I 81 00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:51,600 Speaker 2: don't want to like talk to any prior Bachelor or 82 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:52,600 Speaker 2: bacheybt that too. 83 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:54,360 Speaker 1: I get that because you want to, you want to 84 00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:55,800 Speaker 1: you want to be original too. 85 00:03:56,080 --> 00:03:59,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, I thought, yeah. But I will say though, that 86 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,600 Speaker 2: it was rooted in and ignorance, and I thought that 87 00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:04,880 Speaker 2: I had to really incorrect assumption that most of the 88 00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:07,000 Speaker 2: people that went on reality television I couldn't relate to. 89 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:10,240 Speaker 2: I thought, Oh, You're different than most of these people, 90 00:04:10,280 --> 00:04:12,160 Speaker 2: And what I found is I'm not. I actually have 91 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:14,000 Speaker 2: a lot in common with most of the people that 92 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:16,880 Speaker 2: go on reality television, so you know, but that was 93 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:19,240 Speaker 2: a place where I thought, again my ego. I thought 94 00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:21,080 Speaker 2: that I was a I don't want to say above. 95 00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:22,839 Speaker 2: I just thought I was so different and I'm like 96 00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:25,839 Speaker 2: talking to these people isn't going to do anything good 97 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:29,120 Speaker 2: for me. And you know that was an ego, you know, 98 00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:31,440 Speaker 2: thought process, and that really came back to bite me. 99 00:04:31,560 --> 00:04:35,320 Speaker 2: And it also like place I placed myself in a 100 00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:37,240 Speaker 2: place where like I felt like I couldn't relate to anybody. 101 00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:38,960 Speaker 2: It's like, well, that's because you're not willing to like 102 00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:42,360 Speaker 2: talk to the people that can relate to you. So yeah, 103 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:43,920 Speaker 2: I basically said, I'll do this all on my own 104 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,200 Speaker 2: and I'll and I'll be able to like have you know, 105 00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:49,040 Speaker 2: be successful because I looked at the track record and 106 00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:51,480 Speaker 2: I was like, it's a low success rate. Most people 107 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:53,839 Speaker 2: don't make this work. So therefore I need to like 108 00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:57,120 Speaker 2: go do my own thing. And you know that was stupid. 109 00:04:57,360 --> 00:05:01,279 Speaker 3: At what point do you feel like that mentality shifted 110 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:04,960 Speaker 3: and you start to realize you were connecting with these 111 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,400 Speaker 3: people that you felt like you were so different from, 112 00:05:07,880 --> 00:05:11,760 Speaker 3: and do you think it hindered you because you didn't 113 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,360 Speaker 3: think you would be capable of making the mistakes that 114 00:05:14,360 --> 00:05:15,880 Speaker 3: had been made in the past. 115 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:21,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, I had an inflated ego. I just wasn't willing 116 00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:23,840 Speaker 2: to admit it or was aware of it. And so 117 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,919 Speaker 2: I mean I meant well, but I would say that 118 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:29,560 Speaker 2: I probably didn't open up until about like six or 119 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:33,240 Speaker 2: eight months ago. I had this mindset shift where I realized, 120 00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:35,360 Speaker 2: I'm like, dude, you got to stop trying to fight 121 00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:39,640 Speaker 2: this and basically separate yourself from this experience. For one, 122 00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:41,359 Speaker 2: it's done a lot of really great things for you. 123 00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 2: It's it made you live this really unique life, which 124 00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:46,640 Speaker 2: is awesome. You know, like I don't. I get to 125 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:49,400 Speaker 2: live a very fun and exciting life that brings a 126 00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:52,279 Speaker 2: lot of unknowns. So I was like, you know, hey, listen, 127 00:05:52,320 --> 00:05:53,919 Speaker 2: like this has changed your life for the better. I 128 00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:56,760 Speaker 2: found my sense of self through it all. But then 129 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:58,920 Speaker 2: I started realizing, I'm like, you keep trying. You know, 130 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:03,120 Speaker 2: you're pushing away p people that one probably realize you're 131 00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:05,039 Speaker 2: doing it and they're just giving you your distance. But 132 00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:08,400 Speaker 2: also too, it's like nobody else can understand what we've 133 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:10,640 Speaker 2: went through until they've lived it. And so I was like, 134 00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:12,720 Speaker 2: you know, if you want to feel like you have 135 00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:15,760 Speaker 2: a community, then you've got to stop running from that. 136 00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:18,919 Speaker 2: And so I've been like more open now with like 137 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,400 Speaker 2: having conversations with people and realizing that I'm like, these 138 00:06:21,400 --> 00:06:23,760 Speaker 2: people aren't your enemies, you know there they can be 139 00:06:23,839 --> 00:06:27,240 Speaker 2: your friends. And there's a lot of great qualities and 140 00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:30,040 Speaker 2: people that go on TV. I think, you know, you're 141 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,479 Speaker 2: a risk A lot of people that go on TV 142 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:34,440 Speaker 2: or risk takers. They're willing to step into unknown environments 143 00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:37,960 Speaker 2: and you know, they're creative and they're you know, they 144 00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:41,040 Speaker 2: have they have an very open mind, which those are 145 00:06:41,040 --> 00:06:43,320 Speaker 2: the people that I like to associate with. Nowadays, I'm like, 146 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:47,560 Speaker 2: it's it's I realize that there's a lot of that 147 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:50,599 Speaker 2: kind of type of person within the reality TV world. 148 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:55,080 Speaker 1: I think you're like everything you're saying really, I mean 149 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:56,760 Speaker 1: I could really relate to it as well. And I 150 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:59,760 Speaker 1: think it happens to most people that go on the 151 00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:02,880 Speaker 1: show and a either become the lead or or get 152 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:08,560 Speaker 1: big after the show. And like for me, when I 153 00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:11,320 Speaker 1: when I was like, oh, I want to be successful 154 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:13,400 Speaker 1: in this, now you look at it like I have 155 00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:18,360 Speaker 1: to separate myself from everyone else to show that I'm different, 156 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:22,320 Speaker 1: Like I'm I'm not that I'm bigger than the show, 157 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:24,200 Speaker 1: but I'm so much more than the show. I could 158 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:27,960 Speaker 1: do so much more outside of the Bachelor world. And 159 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:32,720 Speaker 1: then you almost it ends up hindering yourself. 160 00:07:32,280 --> 00:07:35,440 Speaker 3: Because alienating your alienating yourself. 161 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:38,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, and it is. It's it's usually like you said it, 162 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 1: it's all it's all ego driven. You're like, I'm bigger 163 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:41,760 Speaker 1: than this. 164 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:46,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean it's it's hard because also too, I 165 00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:49,760 Speaker 2: mean there's a comparison culture that I mean, I find 166 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:54,080 Speaker 2: myself always getting wrapped up into from one season to 167 00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:58,080 Speaker 2: the next. You know that it's hard because you know, 168 00:07:58,120 --> 00:07:59,880 Speaker 2: like you try to avoid it, but I get compared 169 00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:03,320 Speaker 2: to every bachelor, you know, every every seasons, like this 170 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,640 Speaker 2: guy's better than him. You know he's been and so, 171 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:08,040 Speaker 2: you know, my sense itself for a while getting rocked, 172 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:11,040 Speaker 2: you know, especially like Joey. I mean was you know, 173 00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:13,480 Speaker 2: I mean the most beloved bachelor that I'm aware of 174 00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:15,680 Speaker 2: in recent history, and and so you know, there was 175 00:08:15,720 --> 00:08:18,480 Speaker 2: like this I see online, we love Joey. He's so 176 00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:20,760 Speaker 2: much better than Clayton, and you know, like I started 177 00:08:20,760 --> 00:08:24,400 Speaker 2: to even find myself being envious of him, and I 178 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:26,600 Speaker 2: had to basically check myself and say it's not his 179 00:08:26,720 --> 00:08:29,360 Speaker 2: fault that like he's you know, got you know, he's 180 00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:33,160 Speaker 2: in the position that he's in and I've briefly interacted 181 00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:35,360 Speaker 2: with him and he seems like a nice guy. So 182 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,400 Speaker 2: but it's it's hard because like, yeah, you're in this 183 00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:40,679 Speaker 2: environment where there's been I guess what, twenty nine other 184 00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:45,360 Speaker 2: bachelors or twenty eight, and it's it's it's like you 185 00:08:45,440 --> 00:08:47,679 Speaker 2: want to like just be able to be yourself and 186 00:08:47,679 --> 00:08:51,240 Speaker 2: not focus on anything else. But like once we're in it, 187 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:54,200 Speaker 2: you're it's like you're you're never let go from it, 188 00:08:54,280 --> 00:08:56,080 Speaker 2: and people will bring you up and it's like it 189 00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 2: never ends. But again there's a positive to that. It's like, 190 00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,120 Speaker 2: you know, the opportunities. I think people were surprised as 191 00:09:00,120 --> 00:09:02,680 Speaker 2: I came back recently for a fr like why would 192 00:09:02,679 --> 00:09:04,720 Speaker 2: he come back on this experience after what you know 193 00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:07,120 Speaker 2: the show did to him? And I think for me, 194 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:09,720 Speaker 2: it's like, you know, there's there's a sense of accountability, 195 00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:12,720 Speaker 2: like I, you know, also played a part in the 196 00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:15,120 Speaker 2: way that I was you know, portrayed on TV. So 197 00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:17,360 Speaker 2: I'm like they also gave there was a it was 198 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:19,040 Speaker 2: a big blessing. I mean, the things that have come 199 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:21,400 Speaker 2: from it, Like, you know, I don't hate this show. 200 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:23,800 Speaker 2: I you know, I hated the producers at one point 201 00:09:23,880 --> 00:09:27,120 Speaker 2: for sure, but then I realized I was like Clayton, 202 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,640 Speaker 2: I mean, you know, they're not monsters, like they have 203 00:09:29,760 --> 00:09:32,760 Speaker 2: to create an entertaining TV show. And also like, you know, 204 00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:34,480 Speaker 2: you didn't have a body double. You were in there 205 00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:35,680 Speaker 2: doing that all those things. 206 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,640 Speaker 1: When did you come to that realization? 207 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:40,960 Speaker 2: I think like six eight months ago. Yeah, I don't 208 00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 2: just yeah that recently. Yeah, I mean I yeah, I 209 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:48,240 Speaker 2: for so long went back and forth. I mean when 210 00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:51,080 Speaker 2: I first came off TV, people asked me, you know 211 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:53,480 Speaker 2: how I felt about everything, and I said, oh, you know, 212 00:09:53,600 --> 00:09:56,280 Speaker 2: it's there's more than you know, the edits is. There's 213 00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,120 Speaker 2: more than just the edit. You know. That was my 214 00:09:58,160 --> 00:10:01,000 Speaker 2: way of pushing blame on the producers. But I had 215 00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:04,280 Speaker 2: a producer one day bring up to me. He said, hey, 216 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:05,880 Speaker 2: you know, you want to take credit for all the 217 00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:07,560 Speaker 2: good things that were showing on the show, but the 218 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:09,719 Speaker 2: second that something goes south, you you don't want to 219 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:12,079 Speaker 2: take credit for it. You know some of these dates 220 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:14,319 Speaker 2: that you went on, like did you plan those dates? 221 00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:16,720 Speaker 2: And I was like, I don't know, and they're like, well, yeah, 222 00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,240 Speaker 2: so you take credit for those dates, but you don't 223 00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,600 Speaker 2: take credit for the negative stuff, Like how does that 224 00:10:21,880 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 2: that fair? And I was like, no, that's true, Like 225 00:10:23,559 --> 00:10:23,800 Speaker 2: you know. 226 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:25,960 Speaker 3: So it was a great point app to a lot 227 00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:27,120 Speaker 3: of people that have been on the show. 228 00:10:27,559 --> 00:10:29,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, like people when they have a you know, they 229 00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:31,560 Speaker 2: look really great. They take this, you know, a woman 230 00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:33,800 Speaker 2: or the girl takes a guy on this extravagant date 231 00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:36,160 Speaker 2: and everyone's like that's so sweet. It's like, yeah, but 232 00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:37,640 Speaker 2: did you really plan all that out or were you 233 00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:39,160 Speaker 2: just the one that showed up for the date? Right? 234 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:41,120 Speaker 2: Like you're getting all that credit. And so there's a 235 00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:42,760 Speaker 2: lot of people when they come off TV that want 236 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:44,679 Speaker 2: to take credit for all the good but then they 237 00:10:44,679 --> 00:10:46,920 Speaker 2: want to say no, like the producers made me do that, 238 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 2: And it's like, okay, but the else the producers may 239 00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:51,960 Speaker 2: maybe also influenced you to do that those good things too. 240 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:56,360 Speaker 1: So that's why that's why I always I've always been 241 00:10:56,400 --> 00:11:00,480 Speaker 1: a big advocate of not reading comments because I don't 242 00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:02,079 Speaker 1: even want to read the good ones because if I'm 243 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:03,960 Speaker 1: going to accept all the good things people are saying 244 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,560 Speaker 1: about me, and how do I brush off the bad? 245 00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:08,200 Speaker 1: Like if I'm going to accept the good, then I 246 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:10,120 Speaker 1: need to accept the bad. And I know how much 247 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:12,720 Speaker 1: like you could read one hundred great comments like Clayton's 248 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:14,720 Speaker 1: the best, Clayton's the best, but it's that one comment 249 00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:18,000 Speaker 1: that's going to just drive you totally insane. 250 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:20,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, right, I think I said at one point in 251 00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:24,480 Speaker 2: my head it was like one negative comment held the 252 00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:26,600 Speaker 2: way to fifty positive comments. I mean, it got true. 253 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:29,320 Speaker 2: I would see in my DM somebody saying like I 254 00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:31,320 Speaker 2: think you're awesome, and I wouldn't even read the message. 255 00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:33,000 Speaker 2: But then i'd see like you pieces, you know, like 256 00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:35,200 Speaker 2: you know what, and I'd click in on it because 257 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:36,920 Speaker 2: I was like, what are they saying? You know, so 258 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:41,200 Speaker 2: I would start skipping past the positive comments because again 259 00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:43,320 Speaker 2: I was just looking for how can I get as 260 00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:45,480 Speaker 2: a people pleaser? How can I get everybody to like me? 261 00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:48,320 Speaker 2: Why does this person hate me? And you know, then 262 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:51,000 Speaker 2: I got to a place where I realized that people 263 00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:53,880 Speaker 2: don't actually hate me. They hate what I remind them of. 264 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,439 Speaker 2: You know. So a lot of times when i'd respond 265 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:57,959 Speaker 2: back to these people and say, hey, like, just you're 266 00:11:58,080 --> 00:11:59,640 Speaker 2: entitled to your opinion, but why did you feel the 267 00:11:59,679 --> 00:12:01,880 Speaker 2: need to end me this, like why why just why 268 00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:03,760 Speaker 2: send it in the first place. And I actually I 269 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:05,280 Speaker 2: had a lot of people that would respond back and say, 270 00:12:05,320 --> 00:12:06,960 Speaker 2: you know what, you reminded me of an ex boyfriend 271 00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:08,640 Speaker 2: or somebody, you know, a guy if in my high 272 00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:11,360 Speaker 2: school and I'm just really projecting my own insecurities onto 273 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:15,160 Speaker 2: or some variation of that comment. So then I realized 274 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:18,280 Speaker 2: I was like, Okay, people don't know me. There was 275 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:21,880 Speaker 2: a podcast I listened to and it was a really good, 276 00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:24,839 Speaker 2: cool quote which shifted my narrative. They said, if you 277 00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:26,360 Speaker 2: have a problem with me, call me. And if you 278 00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:28,120 Speaker 2: don't have my phone number, you don't know me well 279 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:31,320 Speaker 2: enough to have a problem with me. I think, Yeah, 280 00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:33,439 Speaker 2: when I heard that quote, that was like, that's when 281 00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:36,000 Speaker 2: I was I was really able to let go of 282 00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:38,440 Speaker 2: a lot of like the opinions of strangers because I 283 00:12:38,559 --> 00:12:41,000 Speaker 2: was like, that's such a good that's a good point. 284 00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:42,360 Speaker 2: You know, if you don't have my phone number, you 285 00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:45,320 Speaker 2: don't know me, so you know, you you can't judge me, 286 00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:47,480 Speaker 2: or you can, but like, really you don't know what 287 00:12:47,520 --> 00:12:50,880 Speaker 2: you're judging. You're judging you know, a version of me, 288 00:12:50,920 --> 00:12:54,280 Speaker 2: but that's not the complete version. So yeah, So it 289 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:56,400 Speaker 2: was you know a lot of like little things over 290 00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:58,120 Speaker 2: time in these last two and a half years that 291 00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,600 Speaker 2: I started to like incorporate or leap year and then 292 00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:04,760 Speaker 2: it shifted my narrative slowly. So when the show reached 293 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,240 Speaker 2: out recently, it was like, yeah, we'd like for you 294 00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:07,880 Speaker 2: to come out. It wasn't I was. I was at 295 00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:09,680 Speaker 2: a place where I was healed, and I'm like, hey, 296 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,160 Speaker 2: I don't have any anger resentment towards you guys. I 297 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:14,760 Speaker 2: don't you know, want to burn a bridge. And like 298 00:13:14,840 --> 00:13:18,120 Speaker 2: it's fun to go back and you know, sit there 299 00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:20,200 Speaker 2: and be like, oh, wow, I did this three years ago, right, 300 00:13:20,280 --> 00:13:23,160 Speaker 2: Like it's just it's it's something that is unique that 301 00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:27,440 Speaker 2: like we've done, and you know, it's it's fun to 302 00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:29,240 Speaker 2: like go back in time and sometimes and just like 303 00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:32,559 Speaker 2: relive those moments just because it's like it'll be a 304 00:13:32,559 --> 00:13:34,800 Speaker 2: point in my life where I don't get to Yeah. 305 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:35,960 Speaker 3: You talked about comparison. 306 00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:40,240 Speaker 1: Well, not to cut you off, but very impressed. Congratulations. 307 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:43,160 Speaker 1: You really seem to have like you like beat it, 308 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:47,920 Speaker 1: like mentally you are in a just a way better place. 309 00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:50,360 Speaker 1: And when we first, like when we hung out in 310 00:13:50,679 --> 00:13:54,360 Speaker 1: Paradise when we were there to film like you really, 311 00:13:54,440 --> 00:13:56,760 Speaker 1: I feel like you've really like, yeah, you figured it out. 312 00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:00,520 Speaker 2: I've just got into a good I found self love 313 00:14:00,559 --> 00:14:04,440 Speaker 2: and self confidence, which again stemmed from all of the 314 00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:07,160 Speaker 2: catalyst was the TV show and the negative blowback. So 315 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,160 Speaker 2: I think like it the version of me on The 316 00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:12,480 Speaker 2: Bachelor wasn't the real version of me. I would say, 317 00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:15,080 Speaker 2: it was like the fabricated version or the facade that 318 00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:17,440 Speaker 2: I built that I thought, you know, the large majority 319 00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:19,560 Speaker 2: of people would you know, accept And this goes back 320 00:14:19,560 --> 00:14:21,720 Speaker 2: when I was in medical sales. You know, I was 321 00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:24,040 Speaker 2: told by a coworker to essentially blend that. You know, 322 00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:26,080 Speaker 2: if you stand out in the o R, you're not 323 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 2: doing your job right. You should just blend in. And 324 00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:29,960 Speaker 2: so that's kind of the approach that I took to life. 325 00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:31,480 Speaker 2: I don't want to stand out. I just want to 326 00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:33,800 Speaker 2: you know, be present, make my money, and go through 327 00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:35,680 Speaker 2: life that way. But you know, I have this creative 328 00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:37,320 Speaker 2: side of me that's like, no, I want to express 329 00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:40,400 Speaker 2: myself and you know, I don't want to like confine 330 00:14:40,400 --> 00:14:42,240 Speaker 2: myself to a box. I want to just be me. 331 00:14:42,520 --> 00:14:45,920 Speaker 2: And so when everybody seemingly hated me when I came 332 00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,960 Speaker 2: off the show, I was like, well, I hate myself too. 333 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:50,280 Speaker 2: I don't even like this version of me. So you know, 334 00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:53,160 Speaker 2: either build back up the same version that everyone doesn't like, 335 00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:55,280 Speaker 2: or build back up the real version of you. And 336 00:14:55,320 --> 00:14:58,560 Speaker 2: so I decided to build up the real version of me. 337 00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,400 Speaker 2: And I was like, okay, what would I do if 338 00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:02,600 Speaker 2: people if I didn't care about other people's opinions, And 339 00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:05,120 Speaker 2: dancing was one of the things. Getting earrings was one 340 00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:07,080 Speaker 2: of the things, you know, switching you having a hairstyle 341 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:08,600 Speaker 2: was one of the things. I had a buzz cut 342 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,600 Speaker 2: for so long because it was again it was like 343 00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:12,920 Speaker 2: that's what a typical white dude don't have, or like 344 00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:14,680 Speaker 2: a short little head of hair, and I was like, no, 345 00:15:14,720 --> 00:15:17,840 Speaker 2: I want to like have style, Like I like mullets, 346 00:15:17,840 --> 00:15:19,920 Speaker 2: you know, I like having you know, the earrings. I 347 00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:22,720 Speaker 2: think they look cool. And so I just started doing 348 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:26,520 Speaker 2: all these things and then like it attracted the people 349 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:28,920 Speaker 2: that I wanted in my life. Like I connected with 350 00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,640 Speaker 2: one of my good friends now because I was out 351 00:15:30,640 --> 00:15:32,440 Speaker 2: of a bar and he had an earring. He had 352 00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:34,920 Speaker 2: earrings in a mullet, and so like we happen to 353 00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:37,040 Speaker 2: have a lot in common. We started talking about mindfulness 354 00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:39,000 Speaker 2: and mental health. And I was like, look like it's 355 00:15:39,040 --> 00:15:41,040 Speaker 2: now effortless, Like I don't have to try to wake 356 00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:43,680 Speaker 2: up and be somebody. I can just be me, which 357 00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:46,440 Speaker 2: is so much easier. So yeah, I mean, thank you 358 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:50,000 Speaker 2: for acknowledging that you see some growth. I certainly feel it, 359 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:52,680 Speaker 2: and that's, you know why I want other people to 360 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:55,040 Speaker 2: like kind of see my progression and realize that like, 361 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:59,040 Speaker 2: no matter how far down like the valley, you get, 362 00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:01,040 Speaker 2: like there's a way out, you just have to, like, 363 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:03,360 Speaker 2: you know, put in the effort day in and day out. 364 00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:05,560 Speaker 2: So I'm happy with where I'm at, but it certainly 365 00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:06,480 Speaker 2: there's more room for growth. 366 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:16,480 Speaker 1: Sorry to cut you out, No, you're good. 367 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:18,400 Speaker 3: I was gonna just bring it back to the panel 368 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:21,440 Speaker 3: for a second because you did mention the sense of 369 00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:25,920 Speaker 3: comparison of like we love this person and also we 370 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:29,040 Speaker 3: still hate Clayton, or like this person is so much 371 00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:32,560 Speaker 3: better than Clayton. I mean, like the messaging is so. 372 00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:35,160 Speaker 1: Which is just which is unfair. It is unfair and 373 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 1: it is it's just like it's just mean. It's like 374 00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:39,680 Speaker 1: why it's it's ridiculous. 375 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:46,840 Speaker 3: But to segue from kind of that internet mentality that 376 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:52,840 Speaker 3: we see going onto this panel, do you feel, how 377 00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:57,200 Speaker 3: do you approach this panel without it feeling like I'm 378 00:16:57,320 --> 00:17:00,920 Speaker 3: here to represent Like, well, Grant's about to do something bad, 379 00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:04,000 Speaker 3: but at least he didn't do what I did and 380 00:17:04,119 --> 00:17:07,919 Speaker 3: kind of like almost put yourself in harm's way for 381 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:12,840 Speaker 3: a continuation of this like negative comparison that you're stuck in. Yeah, 382 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:15,720 Speaker 3: that's your mental approach when you, you know, step into 383 00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:18,440 Speaker 3: this panel. And what do you want your like your 384 00:17:18,520 --> 00:17:21,040 Speaker 3: goal to be with, you know, because I think I 385 00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,320 Speaker 3: would be nervous about that if I was in your shoes. 386 00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:26,959 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a great question, And that's certainly a perspective 387 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,720 Speaker 2: that you know, I considered. I thought, hey, okay, they 388 00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:33,400 Speaker 2: want to bring me on to essentially let people know 389 00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:35,520 Speaker 2: that like it's possible to fall in love with multiple people, 390 00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:38,200 Speaker 2: but also in a way like remind everyone that I'm 391 00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:40,440 Speaker 2: the guy that you know, broke the record or whatever 392 00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:42,960 Speaker 2: for most people that I fell in love with. So 393 00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:46,000 Speaker 2: it's like reminding everybody that, oh that this guy sucked, 394 00:17:46,119 --> 00:17:49,200 Speaker 2: you know. And you know, that was certainly like something 395 00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:51,720 Speaker 2: that crossed my mind. But then you know, I thought 396 00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:53,880 Speaker 2: about it and I was like, no, dude, you did this, 397 00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:56,919 Speaker 2: and that was real, you know, and you fell in 398 00:17:56,960 --> 00:18:00,480 Speaker 2: love with each of the women for their their unique characteristics. 399 00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:03,040 Speaker 2: And you know, again, I'm mad. I'm mad at myself 400 00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:07,080 Speaker 2: that I apologized after the show on certain things that 401 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:09,560 Speaker 2: I that I'm I'm not sorry for. I was basically 402 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:12,879 Speaker 2: apologizing because I wanted people all. I was like, oh, 403 00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:14,680 Speaker 2: everyone seems to be mad at me. Let me just apologize. 404 00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:15,800 Speaker 2: And at one point I was like, oh, no, I 405 00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:17,159 Speaker 2: didn't fall in love with all three of them. I 406 00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:20,480 Speaker 2: just fell in love with one, you know. And you know, 407 00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:22,080 Speaker 2: I was hurtful to the women that you know that 408 00:18:22,119 --> 00:18:23,879 Speaker 2: I expressed feelings of love towards, and I was like, 409 00:18:23,920 --> 00:18:26,360 Speaker 2: that's that's not true. You did fall in love with 410 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,320 Speaker 2: all three of them, so you know, but again, I 411 00:18:28,359 --> 00:18:30,720 Speaker 2: was just saying whatever I could say to get people 412 00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:33,679 Speaker 2: to like me. So you know, when I as I 413 00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:37,159 Speaker 2: was like going into afar this last one, I just 414 00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:39,720 Speaker 2: I reminded myself that I was like Clayton, you know, 415 00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:41,760 Speaker 2: you did at the time what you thought was best, 416 00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,760 Speaker 2: and and so you made decisions and stand by them. 417 00:18:44,800 --> 00:18:47,439 Speaker 2: I mean, I don't regret any of the things that 418 00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:50,400 Speaker 2: I did. I would do them differently now three years later. 419 00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:53,800 Speaker 2: But in hindsight, like I look back at that whole 420 00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:56,320 Speaker 2: experience and I'm like, you know, you're you weren't a 421 00:18:56,320 --> 00:18:59,040 Speaker 2: monster like half the people said you were. You were 422 00:18:59,119 --> 00:19:01,880 Speaker 2: you didn't mean you know, you know, anything, you did 423 00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:04,200 Speaker 2: what you thought was best. So ultimately, give yourself grace. 424 00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:07,240 Speaker 2: And I'm not embarrassed by anything that I did. I 425 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:10,040 Speaker 2: think I was received poorly, but like, okay, so what 426 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:13,359 Speaker 2: I mean. You know, I took the actions and I 427 00:19:13,359 --> 00:19:15,639 Speaker 2: can live by them. So going on Afar, I was like, 428 00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:18,080 Speaker 2: just be you, you know, and they told me like, hey, 429 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:20,800 Speaker 2: you got like twenty seconds to respond, so don't don't 430 00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:23,000 Speaker 2: start blabbering like you you know, everyone knows that I 431 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:24,840 Speaker 2: talked Tom long winded, So I was like, hey, I'll 432 00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:28,120 Speaker 2: say my little twenty seconds and smile and that'll be it. 433 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:28,960 Speaker 2: And that's what I did. 434 00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:31,840 Speaker 3: Do you feel like at any point you were like 435 00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:34,439 Speaker 3: losing sight of who you were as a person due 436 00:19:34,480 --> 00:19:38,520 Speaker 3: to your people pleasing tendencies? After the show thousand. 437 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:41,000 Speaker 2: Percent, you know, I every day I woke up, I 438 00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:43,800 Speaker 2: was just reading new comments and then taking them to 439 00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:47,280 Speaker 2: heart and saying, okay, this they these people think I'm stupid, 440 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:50,639 Speaker 2: So how do I prove that I'm not stupid, you know. 441 00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,679 Speaker 2: Like I remember a point when before it was revealed 442 00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:56,480 Speaker 2: that Susan and I were together, I was dropping like 443 00:19:56,720 --> 00:20:00,199 Speaker 2: subtle clues on my Instagram, like I would like make 444 00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,480 Speaker 2: a post alluding to the fact that I may be 445 00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:05,320 Speaker 2: with somebody. Like there was a post where I was 446 00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:07,240 Speaker 2: like staying at the edge of the bed and like 447 00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:09,399 Speaker 2: Susie's leg was like you could see the outline of 448 00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:11,679 Speaker 2: a leg. Potentially it might be there, may not be. 449 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:14,760 Speaker 2: I also had another post where I was like looking 450 00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:16,560 Speaker 2: back at the camera and I said, looking back at 451 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:20,520 Speaker 2: my past, present and future. And I was because people 452 00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:23,479 Speaker 2: said I was stupid. I was like dropping clues and 453 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:25,360 Speaker 2: nobody was figuring it out, and I'm like, you're all 454 00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:29,080 Speaker 2: so stupid that like IM just toying with you all. 455 00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,560 Speaker 2: But again, my ego is just like you're not stupid 456 00:20:31,600 --> 00:20:34,480 Speaker 2: because you're over here playing games with these people. And again, 457 00:20:34,520 --> 00:20:38,440 Speaker 2: like I was just like wasting time playing games when 458 00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:40,679 Speaker 2: it was like this, Like I mean, it was just 459 00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:41,719 Speaker 2: like what are you doing this for? 460 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:43,239 Speaker 3: You know, And it was trying to prove it to 461 00:20:43,320 --> 00:20:44,840 Speaker 3: them or yourself. 462 00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:50,400 Speaker 2: Both both, but really myself. Yeah, you know, I yeah, 463 00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:52,760 Speaker 2: I was trying to prove to myself that I had 464 00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:57,280 Speaker 2: value and that I was actually inquisitive and smart and 465 00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:01,399 Speaker 2: I had emotional intelligence. But you know, the reality was 466 00:21:01,560 --> 00:21:04,280 Speaker 2: is like I mean I had I don't think I 467 00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:06,119 Speaker 2: had the emotional intelligence that I definitely, I mean, I 468 00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:08,119 Speaker 2: definitely didn't have like what like I do today and 469 00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:09,439 Speaker 2: I still have a long ways to go. But I 470 00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:11,719 Speaker 2: grew up in an environment wheally on household of three boys, 471 00:21:11,800 --> 00:21:14,960 Speaker 2: you know, no sisters. You know, basically everything we did 472 00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:17,840 Speaker 2: was physical and never talked about emotions. You know, my 473 00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:22,000 Speaker 2: dad was old school, and so it was like, yeah, 474 00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:23,680 Speaker 2: a lot of these things I was trying to prove 475 00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,480 Speaker 2: to people I had, but then I realized what I 476 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:27,119 Speaker 2: did and didn't possess, you know. And there was a 477 00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:29,919 Speaker 2: lot of constructive criticism where people are like, hey, you know, 478 00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:32,359 Speaker 2: he meant well, but ultimately, I don't think he's aware 479 00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:34,760 Speaker 2: of the fact that, like we understand where he was 480 00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:37,560 Speaker 2: coming from. He's but you know, ultimately, like he keeps 481 00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:39,879 Speaker 2: trying to explain why he did what he did as 482 00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:43,040 Speaker 2: opposed to just take accountability. And you know that that 483 00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:45,240 Speaker 2: was a comment that was said multiple times that really 484 00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,600 Speaker 2: hit me. I'm like oh, so I'm trying to be 485 00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:50,760 Speaker 2: right because the people pleaser oftentimes wants to be right right. 486 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:52,840 Speaker 2: I feel like if I had, you know, I had 487 00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:54,399 Speaker 2: so many times to be wrong in front of it 488 00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:57,960 Speaker 2: in someone's you know, somebody's perspective before they basically canceled 489 00:21:57,960 --> 00:21:59,320 Speaker 2: me out of their life. Like that's the way that 490 00:21:59,359 --> 00:22:01,560 Speaker 2: I used to think, if I'm wrong enough times, this 491 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:04,199 Speaker 2: person like all right, strike three year out. So you know, 492 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,360 Speaker 2: I always felt like I had to be right. Well, 493 00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:08,840 Speaker 2: then like as I started to progress mentally, I realized, 494 00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:11,120 Speaker 2: I'm like, no, it's not about being right, it's about understanding, 495 00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:14,240 Speaker 2: you know, and taking accountability. Like that's the next level 496 00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:16,840 Speaker 2: of mental maturity that like you have to you know, 497 00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:21,560 Speaker 2: work be able to get to. So yeah, I it's 498 00:22:21,600 --> 00:22:26,080 Speaker 2: just been like I think reading the comments was both 499 00:22:26,119 --> 00:22:30,399 Speaker 2: destructive but also what I needed because I needed people 500 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:33,679 Speaker 2: to hold me accountable and I wasn't holding myself accountable. 501 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,359 Speaker 1: I also think it plays a part, and I think 502 00:22:38,119 --> 00:22:40,920 Speaker 1: grants a little similar to you in this area where 503 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:45,359 Speaker 1: you guys, both you you lested like midway through the show, 504 00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:47,600 Speaker 1: right like you you you went home like what like 505 00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:48,840 Speaker 1: six or seven. 506 00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:52,639 Speaker 2: Eight, So you know, in that respect. 507 00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:57,480 Speaker 1: You don't you don't have as much experience on the 508 00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:00,840 Speaker 1: show where I do think like the contestants at either 509 00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:03,919 Speaker 1: get heartbroken like at the very end, like a Joey 510 00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:05,639 Speaker 1: who could then go on the bachelorm and be like, okay, 511 00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:08,560 Speaker 1: like let me like actually look at what happened to 512 00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:12,800 Speaker 1: me this experience, and now I could do it differently 513 00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:15,320 Speaker 1: or at least like know how other people feel in 514 00:23:15,359 --> 00:23:17,800 Speaker 1: this process where when you get when you get picked 515 00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:19,520 Speaker 1: off at the middle and then you get thrown as 516 00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:22,879 Speaker 1: the bachelor. You I could see you looking at it 517 00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:25,080 Speaker 1: like can't you even really can you really fall in 518 00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:27,400 Speaker 1: love on the show? Like was I really in love 519 00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:30,920 Speaker 1: with Michelle? Like I just don't know if you even 520 00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:34,200 Speaker 1: take it as seriously go in with. 521 00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:35,879 Speaker 3: Like much less information to work with. 522 00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:38,119 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I agree with you, guys. I mean I 523 00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:40,560 Speaker 2: never fell in love with Michelle, so I kind of 524 00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:41,760 Speaker 2: just was like, oh, all right, yeah, this is what 525 00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:44,119 Speaker 2: I thought reality television was, like you go on here, 526 00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:46,400 Speaker 2: you know, I got knocked out in the top eight 527 00:23:46,480 --> 00:23:48,000 Speaker 2: or whatever, and I was like all right. So then 528 00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:51,280 Speaker 2: when I became the Bachelor, I was like, well, you know, 529 00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:54,760 Speaker 2: hopefully within these thirty women there's at least one person 530 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:56,600 Speaker 2: that I'll have interest in. But I remember thinking like, 531 00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:58,359 Speaker 2: I don't know, like I'm kind of picky, I have 532 00:23:58,400 --> 00:24:01,359 Speaker 2: a certain you know type, or I'm looking for something, 533 00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:03,480 Speaker 2: and I mean a single still at twenty eight years 534 00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:06,159 Speaker 2: of age, so like, obviously I haven't settled down for 535 00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:09,160 Speaker 2: what reasons, while I haven't found exactly what I'm looking for. 536 00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:12,159 Speaker 2: So yeah, I went in being like maybe you know, 537 00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:14,119 Speaker 2: but there's this I was. I was nervous night one. 538 00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:15,359 Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't know if I'll be interested in 539 00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:17,679 Speaker 2: any of these girls, like before I saw them, and 540 00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:19,520 Speaker 2: then the second they started stepping out the limo, I 541 00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:21,120 Speaker 2: was like, all right, I'm like. 542 00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:24,000 Speaker 3: There because you're like I've been on one season and 543 00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:27,560 Speaker 3: I didn't fall in love, so there's no like reassurance 544 00:24:27,720 --> 00:24:30,280 Speaker 3: like I know that I can fall in love in 545 00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:32,800 Speaker 3: this environment. So I feel like you're going in with 546 00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:34,960 Speaker 3: that mentality of like we'll see if I could even 547 00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:37,960 Speaker 3: fall in love. You probably go in like no guards 548 00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:40,160 Speaker 3: up to an extent. You're like, I'll throw my heart 549 00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:43,560 Speaker 3: out there, no problem, Like what's the risk because you're 550 00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:46,400 Speaker 3: coming off of a season where you were not necessarily heartbroken, 551 00:24:47,119 --> 00:24:50,359 Speaker 3: and then it kind of you know, we hit the 552 00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:51,399 Speaker 3: other end of the scale with you. 553 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:55,600 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, Well I fought it until the last second 554 00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:59,040 Speaker 2: because you know, I had I think I had five 555 00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:02,000 Speaker 2: women or something that like start expressing their feelings towards me. 556 00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:06,080 Speaker 2: And then I was like, oh, I'm not opening up still. 557 00:25:06,119 --> 00:25:07,520 Speaker 2: I knew in the back of my head. I like, 558 00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:10,040 Speaker 2: I was asked early on by a producer like, you, 559 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:11,800 Speaker 2: could you see yourself fall in love with multiple people? 560 00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:13,680 Speaker 2: I said no. They said why is that? I said, 561 00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:16,280 Speaker 2: because that'll be an absolute mess if I get to 562 00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,080 Speaker 2: that place, I won't know how to navigate that. And 563 00:25:18,119 --> 00:25:20,680 Speaker 2: then I did it, and it's like, you know, I 564 00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:21,959 Speaker 2: and I you know, I'm even mentioned that on I 565 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:24,720 Speaker 2: far recently, but that was the truth. Like I remember 566 00:25:24,760 --> 00:25:28,160 Speaker 2: I was coming down in an elevator and Raykivic Iceland 567 00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:30,840 Speaker 2: and I started hysterically laughing, and they're like, what are 568 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:32,440 Speaker 2: you laughing at. I wasn't on camera at this point, 569 00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:35,120 Speaker 2: and I said, I'm soft and they were like why. 570 00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:36,560 Speaker 2: I said, because I just realized I fell in love 571 00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:39,520 Speaker 2: with multiple women. And they were like, get them into 572 00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:46,280 Speaker 2: you know, get them into a room, you know. But 573 00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:49,000 Speaker 2: I was laughing because I was like I'm seriously so screwed. 574 00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:51,400 Speaker 2: And you know, typically humor is a way to like divert, 575 00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:54,320 Speaker 2: you know, away from feeling like you're under in a 576 00:25:54,359 --> 00:25:56,400 Speaker 2: threat or you know, like a versus coming. And it's 577 00:25:56,400 --> 00:25:59,399 Speaker 2: like I would I was just like laughing. But then 578 00:25:59,440 --> 00:26:01,440 Speaker 2: I realized. I was like, I have to tell these women, 579 00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:03,480 Speaker 2: you know, you do feel love towards each of them, 580 00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:07,159 Speaker 2: and it's three people, so it was, yeah, it was 581 00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:09,760 Speaker 2: like this weird feeling. And at that point, I mean, 582 00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:11,720 Speaker 2: there was maybe like I don't know, seven days left, 583 00:26:12,160 --> 00:26:13,960 Speaker 2: so I was like, not only do like I did, 584 00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:15,359 Speaker 2: I just realize this, but now I have to go 585 00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:17,399 Speaker 2: tell them all right away. But I was excited. I 586 00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:19,600 Speaker 2: was like, I get to tell people I love them, 587 00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:21,399 Speaker 2: you know, so like in that moment, I was like 588 00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:24,760 Speaker 2: so excited. So I go tell them and it's met well, 589 00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:26,520 Speaker 2: and they're excited, you know, because a couple of them 590 00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:28,040 Speaker 2: were like, hey, if you don't tell me soon, I'm 591 00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:29,399 Speaker 2: going to close off. So I was like, yeah, I 592 00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:32,199 Speaker 2: also like need like I get that, like you've told me, 593 00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:33,879 Speaker 2: but I haven't told you, so naturally you're going to 594 00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:35,800 Speaker 2: pull back, and I don't want that to happen. You know, 595 00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:37,679 Speaker 2: I want you to. I want to fully open up 596 00:26:37,720 --> 00:26:40,920 Speaker 2: to you and vice versa. But I knew things were again, 597 00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:42,399 Speaker 2: Like my head like was all over the place. I 598 00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:44,159 Speaker 2: remember I was on a date with one of them, 599 00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:45,440 Speaker 2: and I remember looking at them and being like, I 600 00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:47,240 Speaker 2: don't want this to end, you know, I want to 601 00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:48,720 Speaker 2: like date all three of these women. And I was like, 602 00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:50,320 Speaker 2: you can't do that, you know. It's like that's how 603 00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:52,040 Speaker 2: crazy my mind was, Like I was like, I just 604 00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:52,320 Speaker 2: want to. 605 00:26:52,320 --> 00:26:55,080 Speaker 3: Keep doing it on the next season of Wise. 606 00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:05,640 Speaker 1: Wait, how how do you think so where you're at 607 00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,720 Speaker 1: mentally today? Yeah, how do you think you would handle 608 00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:12,240 Speaker 1: the situation? Now? If you were the bachelor and you 609 00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:15,959 Speaker 1: and you would fall for multiple women you're near the end? 610 00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:21,119 Speaker 2: Well, I would communicate times one thousand, I think, you know, 611 00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:24,119 Speaker 2: that's where and I think it's shared responsibility. I do 612 00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:26,920 Speaker 2: wish a couple of women would have been more you know, communicative. 613 00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:28,359 Speaker 2: I felt like they could have done more. But on 614 00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:30,520 Speaker 2: the same front, I should have asked more questions. You know, 615 00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:34,480 Speaker 2: I wasn't asking enough, so this time around, you know, 616 00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:35,800 Speaker 2: if I were to do it a second time, I 617 00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:38,600 Speaker 2: would ask way more questions, you know, so that there 618 00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:42,399 Speaker 2: aren't any surprises. Would I hold myself back from like 619 00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:44,919 Speaker 2: following form multiple people? No, Now I would do if 620 00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:46,640 Speaker 2: I fell in love again with multi people, I would 621 00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:49,720 Speaker 2: do it. I mean it's it's if you give yourself permission, 622 00:27:49,840 --> 00:27:52,720 Speaker 2: you can't do it. And I don't think like the 623 00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:55,240 Speaker 2: the the environment allows for it, you know, like the 624 00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:58,280 Speaker 2: if you do it correctly. In my opinion, if you 625 00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:00,280 Speaker 2: if you are you know, play the batchel for a 626 00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:02,600 Speaker 2: role as it should be whatching got on? Is there 627 00:28:02,680 --> 00:28:04,439 Speaker 2: right a wrong way to do it? But I'm like, 628 00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:06,800 Speaker 2: if you're gonna date multiple people, then you should be 629 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:10,280 Speaker 2: also willing to like stay open to all thirty of 630 00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:12,159 Speaker 2: those people or however many. So falling in love with 631 00:28:12,240 --> 00:28:14,760 Speaker 2: multiple people if you're doing it correctly is just inevitable 632 00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:16,879 Speaker 2: in my in my opinion. But I mean again, I 633 00:28:16,880 --> 00:28:18,359 Speaker 2: could you could find a bachelor, they'd be like, no, 634 00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:21,199 Speaker 2: you find one person, zero went on them. I just 635 00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:23,080 Speaker 2: that's just not the way I'm hardwired. I mean, but 636 00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:25,560 Speaker 2: I also I'm a monogamous person. I don't never date 637 00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:27,399 Speaker 2: multiple people a multiple you know, in real life, and 638 00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:29,840 Speaker 2: don't plan on it. But I would still find myself 639 00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:32,640 Speaker 2: being like, yeah, this this show allows you where else 640 00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:35,280 Speaker 2: can you go? And I say this, this is the 641 00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:37,240 Speaker 2: one thing where like it tricked my brain where I 642 00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:39,360 Speaker 2: was like, this doesn't make any sense. I was on 643 00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:43,480 Speaker 2: a group date. I kiss this girl. We keep talking, 644 00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:45,640 Speaker 2: you know, her and I are off alone. Another girl 645 00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:47,480 Speaker 2: comes in. It's like, hey, can I steal you? She 646 00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:50,240 Speaker 2: goes away. Her and I start talking. About five or 647 00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:52,320 Speaker 2: six minutes in, I go in for the kiss. She 648 00:28:52,320 --> 00:28:54,840 Speaker 2: stops me. She goes hold on, wipes off my lips 649 00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:57,040 Speaker 2: you have lipstick on your lips, and then goes in 650 00:28:57,080 --> 00:29:00,520 Speaker 2: and kisses me. I'm like, I just from my brain 651 00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:03,360 Speaker 2: being like, Okay, things just don't This isn't real world, 652 00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:05,800 Speaker 2: as in, like things op differently here, like that would 653 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:08,920 Speaker 2: never fly in the real world, but because like you're 654 00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:12,080 Speaker 2: you're in this environment where you're given permission by the women. 655 00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:14,560 Speaker 4: I don't know why that story has rattled me like 656 00:29:14,600 --> 00:29:17,680 Speaker 4: I was on the show, but I'm like, whoa, it's 657 00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:21,680 Speaker 4: just like such a like specific example of yeah, exactly 658 00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:23,760 Speaker 4: what you're saying something that would never fly in the 659 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:27,760 Speaker 4: real world, but that it could totally happen multiple times 660 00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:28,720 Speaker 4: when you're the bachelor. 661 00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:32,000 Speaker 2: So when you give yourself permission, and I was given 662 00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:34,920 Speaker 2: permission by all the women, the producers, and the audience 663 00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:36,960 Speaker 2: at the time didn't exist. It was, you know, just filming. 664 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:39,959 Speaker 2: So it's like I was given permission, and I finally 665 00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:42,720 Speaker 2: gave myself permission to be like, Okay, I'm going to 666 00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:45,200 Speaker 2: compartmentalize each of these relationships. When I'm with this person, 667 00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,240 Speaker 2: I'm one hundred percent with them. When i'm with this person, 668 00:29:47,240 --> 00:29:49,320 Speaker 2: I'm one hundred percent with them, and then when I'm alone, 669 00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:50,800 Speaker 2: that's when I have to take the time to like 670 00:29:50,840 --> 00:29:53,880 Speaker 2: break down each of the relationships. But you know, I 671 00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:55,840 Speaker 2: I still do this day. I'm like I stand by that. 672 00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:59,120 Speaker 2: I think like I did it the way that I 673 00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:01,400 Speaker 2: think the show certainly wants it to be done. But 674 00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:04,080 Speaker 2: I was like, hey, like this would not fly in 675 00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:05,760 Speaker 2: the real world, but we're not in the real world, 676 00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:07,880 Speaker 2: so I this is the way that like this makes 677 00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:09,960 Speaker 2: sense to me, and I want to, you know, give 678 00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:11,800 Speaker 2: this a fair shot, and I don't want to leave 679 00:30:11,800 --> 00:30:14,680 Speaker 2: anything on the table. So yeah, but that tripped my 680 00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:16,440 Speaker 2: mind of it was there's it was instances like that 681 00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:19,160 Speaker 2: where I was just like, yeah, like Clayton, you can't 682 00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:23,320 Speaker 2: take real world values and and like situations and apply 683 00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:25,240 Speaker 2: them to this environment. It does not fit. 684 00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:28,400 Speaker 1: So yeah, I mean that, Yeah, that makes total sense 685 00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:30,840 Speaker 1: because you basically, like, as you're going through it, you 686 00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:33,920 Speaker 1: have to remind yourself that like this is okay, Like 687 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:36,239 Speaker 1: it's okay to fall in love with multiple women, like 688 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:37,800 Speaker 1: it's okay. 689 00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:39,200 Speaker 3: To do things that feel abnormal. 690 00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:42,360 Speaker 1: But then the audience watches it back and they're like, no, 691 00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:45,040 Speaker 1: actually it wasn't okay, you fuckingn asshole, Like you shouldn't 692 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:48,080 Speaker 1: have done that, and you're like wait, but everybody said 693 00:30:48,120 --> 00:30:50,080 Speaker 1: it was okay. And then all the girls that were 694 00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 1: giving you validation are also jumping in on the on 695 00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:56,800 Speaker 1: the audience train and they're like, yeah, Clayton, you're an asshole, 696 00:30:56,880 --> 00:30:58,080 Speaker 1: Like you are an asshole. 697 00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:00,640 Speaker 2: And then you're like, oh yeah, it's like it's a 698 00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:03,960 Speaker 2: pile on you know, and it's it's that's when it's hard, 699 00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:07,040 Speaker 2: because you're like, wait, like you were okay with it, 700 00:31:07,120 --> 00:31:08,960 Speaker 2: you know then, but you're not okay with it now, 701 00:31:09,640 --> 00:31:10,920 Speaker 2: you know. But then there was again, there was so 702 00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,280 Speaker 2: many experiences, like there was a women when I was 703 00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:15,560 Speaker 2: had my women tell all. There was a girl that 704 00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:18,160 Speaker 2: I was out on the boat with in San Diego 705 00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:21,400 Speaker 2: a week prior with friends and hey, Clayton, Oh my gosh, 706 00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:23,360 Speaker 2: so great to see you. Hugs me. We're hanging out, 707 00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:27,000 Speaker 2: we're talking, and then come women tell all she's at 708 00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:30,800 Speaker 2: my throat, I mean, only on full attack. And then 709 00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:32,600 Speaker 2: at the end of it, she comes up to me 710 00:31:32,640 --> 00:31:34,000 Speaker 2: and was like, hey, sab you ben. I was like, 711 00:31:34,080 --> 00:31:36,560 Speaker 2: what was that, And she's like, oh, Clayton, it's just TV, 712 00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:38,680 Speaker 2: Like come on now, like you you like, don't take 713 00:31:38,680 --> 00:31:39,320 Speaker 2: it too seriously. 714 00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:41,200 Speaker 3: And I was like, no, it was easy for you 715 00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:44,080 Speaker 3: to say you're getting attacked. 716 00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:46,040 Speaker 2: Public kill it on a boat, and then you're call 717 00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:49,160 Speaker 2: me an idiot you know, later like I just but 718 00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:51,600 Speaker 2: then again, now I understand that, and I think again, 719 00:31:51,640 --> 00:31:53,520 Speaker 2: I say all these things and someone might be like, see, Walt, 720 00:31:53,560 --> 00:31:55,560 Speaker 2: reality television is not real. I'm like, no, that's not true. 721 00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:57,720 Speaker 2: I also don't stand by that. I'm like, you know, 722 00:31:57,920 --> 00:31:59,760 Speaker 2: I there was times when I had to play a role, 723 00:31:59,800 --> 00:32:02,240 Speaker 2: but eighty percent of the time I was I was me, 724 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:04,880 Speaker 2: you know, or it was uninfluenced or you know, like 725 00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:07,160 Speaker 2: just went in and was you know. I'm like, okay, yeah, sure, 726 00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:09,440 Speaker 2: Like there's certain times where we have to maybe play 727 00:32:09,480 --> 00:32:11,480 Speaker 2: up a narrative, but overall, I was like, at the end, 728 00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:14,600 Speaker 2: it was what you saw was real. So there's absolutely 729 00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:17,040 Speaker 2: real elements to it. But you know again, like some 730 00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:19,160 Speaker 2: people have motives and they I don't think that's just 731 00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:21,920 Speaker 2: shocked anybody, And so I had to realize that. I'm like, oh, 732 00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:24,760 Speaker 2: people are playing roles here. Not everybody, but some are, 733 00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:27,160 Speaker 2: and so this becomes this whole psychological game of like 734 00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:30,720 Speaker 2: who's here for the right reasons who's not? And I 735 00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:32,680 Speaker 2: think that's what's enticing. I'm like, oh, it was kind 736 00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:34,160 Speaker 2: of fun until it wasn't. 737 00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:39,880 Speaker 1: It's also, yeah, people experience it differently. Like I went 738 00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:43,880 Speaker 1: home night one and I remember going home being like, yeah, 739 00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:47,680 Speaker 1: like it because of my ego, because I was so 740 00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:51,000 Speaker 1: embarrassed to go home night one. In my head, I'm like, well, 741 00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:54,040 Speaker 1: that show's like fake, like it's all bullshit. And then 742 00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:55,560 Speaker 1: when I go back on and I make it all 743 00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:59,080 Speaker 1: the way to the end, I'm like, oh, this is actually, 744 00:32:59,080 --> 00:33:01,800 Speaker 1: this is real. I have so I could see how 745 00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:05,360 Speaker 1: a girl that goes home whatever week three on your 746 00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:08,040 Speaker 1: show is like friends with you in the real world, 747 00:33:08,040 --> 00:33:09,960 Speaker 1: but like it's just TV. We're just putting on a show. 748 00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:14,000 Speaker 1: Because everyone people have different experiences. Okay, I think that's 749 00:33:14,040 --> 00:33:15,920 Speaker 1: a good place to stop the first half. Thank you 750 00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:19,480 Speaker 1: everyone for listening to Bachelor Happy Hour, and make sure 751 00:33:19,520 --> 00:33:21,480 Speaker 1: you stay tuned because we will have Part two with 752 00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:23,000 Speaker 1: Clayton coming up very soon. 753 00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:24,560 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for listening. 754 00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:25,360 Speaker 1: Bye.