Speaker 1: Just because you see people in the parking line don't
Speaker 1: mean they don't got shit to say.
Speaker 2: And this parking lot himpen is not the picky you
Speaker 2: probably think it is.
Speaker 3: Dead ass, dead ass.
Speaker 4: Hey, I'm Kadeen and I'm devoued and we're the Ellis's.
Speaker 3: You may know us from posting funny videos with.
Speaker 2: Our voice and reading each other publicly as a form
Speaker 2: of therapy.
Speaker 3: Wait, I make you need therapy most days. Wow.
Speaker 2: Oh, and one more important thing to mention, we're married.
Speaker 3: Yes, sir, we are.
Speaker 1: We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of
Speaker 1: Li's most taboo topics.
Speaker 2: Things most folks don't want to talk about.
Speaker 3: Through the lens of a millennial married couple.
Speaker 1: Dead ass is a term that we say every day.
Speaker 1: So when we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts
Speaker 1: one hundred the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but
Speaker 1: the truth. We about to take philosof to our whole
Speaker 1: new level.
Speaker 2: Dead ass starts right now.
Speaker 1: Before we get into it, our guests, I want to
Speaker 1: tell this story. I was a little bit upset about
Speaker 1: this story, but I did understand what was happening. So
Speaker 1: I'm going to, you know, explain a little bit in
Speaker 1: twenty twenty. This was after Kobe's passing, who else had passed?
Speaker 1: Pop Smoking passed, George Floyd was murdered, and also Chadwick Boseman.
Speaker 3: Had died that summer.
Speaker 1: It was just a heavy, heavy year and Kadeen and
Speaker 1: I had decided that we were going to dedicate that
Speaker 1: season of the podcast to the socioeconomic and socio political
Speaker 1: unrest that was happening in America during that time in
Speaker 1: twenty twenty. That was sparked by George Floyd, but also
Speaker 1: Breonna Taylor, also online arbery.
Speaker 3: There were so many events that happened at that time.
Speaker 1: And for that season, we interviewed Sean King, my son,
Speaker 1: the general we into we interviewed at the time who
Speaker 1: was Vice President Biden, this before he won the presidency
Speaker 1: from Donald Trump. But we had interviewed a bunch of
Speaker 1: different people dealing with socio political and socio economic issues.
Speaker 1: And not for nothing, that was our lowest listen to
Speaker 1: season today like it was our The funny thing is
Speaker 1: our highest listen to episode was the episode we talked
Speaker 1: about Pressure, which is when we.
Speaker 3: Talked about sex in the midst of the season.
Speaker 1: That was our second episode, but it was just funny
Speaker 1: to me that when we chose to speak about things
Speaker 1: that were dear to us and dear to our community,
Speaker 1: that people stopped listening.
Speaker 3: And before we get into.
Speaker 1: First of all, I guess so I'm excited about being here.
Speaker 1: I just want to give a little bit of my
Speaker 1: idea of why the numbers were down. First and foremost,
Speaker 1: I felt like people just needed a break. You know,
Speaker 1: we released that season of the end of twenty twenty,
Speaker 1: so we'd already dealt with a lot in the beginning.
Speaker 4: Because everything kind of kicked in March. Yeah, everything kicked
Speaker 4: in March January with Kobe.
Speaker 1: But yeah, so we we released that season, I believe
Speaker 1: in September September October, and I feel like people were
Speaker 1: just fatigued because they were watching CNN every day. They
Speaker 1: were listening to all the pundits speak, and I feel
Speaker 1: like it was everything escape.
Speaker 3: It was a lot.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like they were looking for an escape.
Speaker 1: So that's why our numbers were down. But I am
Speaker 1: interested in asking our guests when we come back from break,
Speaker 1: her thoughts about it.
Speaker 2: It'll be interesting.
Speaker 1: We're going to take a quick break, okay, and when
Speaker 1: we come back, Kay's going to introduce our guests.
Speaker 2: Sounds good, stick around, y'all.
Speaker 1: Kay decided that we were going to start a new
Speaker 1: karaoke trend. Yes, and the karaoke trend is not going
Speaker 1: to well, the karaoke song is no longer going to
Speaker 1: be related to the topic because sometimes we just feel
Speaker 1: in the vibe.
Speaker 2: That's a fact. And sometimes we've been having a hard
Speaker 2: time trying to figure out a song that correlates to
Speaker 2: the topic because a lot of times it doesn't even
Speaker 2: really correlate. It just might have one or two words
Speaker 2: that makes sense.
Speaker 4: Like today, I was like, oh, parking lot pimp but
Speaker 4: we should do big pimping, right, Well.
Speaker 3: We're supposed to surprise them with the don't let you do.
Speaker 2: Car You said we were going off with vibes.
Speaker 4: I thought you were gonna do the other song that
Speaker 4: we were talking about that we fell asleep to last night.
Speaker 1: All right, So since we're going on vibes and Carrey
Speaker 1: fucked up the introduction for fucking lot pimping, we're gonna
Speaker 1: go with the other song that we fell asleep to
Speaker 1: last night.
Speaker 2: Oh, we could do both.
Speaker 1: I mean we were we fell asleep to last night
Speaker 1: because I was sleep so I don't remember girl. Oh gosh, okay,
Speaker 1: you started.
Speaker 4: This is your song, bro, I can't tell you how
Speaker 4: I feel about.
Speaker 2: You night and day.
Speaker 1: So the reason why she's singing the song is because
Speaker 1: it's a part in the song. It comes the bridge
Speaker 1: and the break and he just goes girl, and that
Speaker 1: is my favorite part of the song.
Speaker 4: And I don't know why we find that part so funny. Y'all.
Speaker 1: Go listen to I'll Be Shore's song yes, night and day,
Speaker 1: night and day, and.
Speaker 3: And there's a partner where he goes girl.
Speaker 2: Over and over again.
Speaker 3: He says it twice.
Speaker 4: It felt like it was over and over it.
Speaker 5: Girls.
Speaker 4: All right, we're back, and I'm going to introduce our guests,
Speaker 4: so that way she can kind of chime in because
Speaker 4: she's been listening behind the scenes to the story, and
Speaker 4: we want to get her a two cents about why
Speaker 4: she thinks that was happening then and what it looks
Speaker 4: like now. In the scope of twenty twenty three, we're
Speaker 4: still dealing with a lot of things. I think we're
Speaker 4: always dealing with something when it comes to socioeconomic and
Speaker 4: political issues.
Speaker 2: But today we're parking lot pimping, y'all.
Speaker 4: And if y'all if you didn't know what Parking Lot
Speaker 4: Pimping was, Baby, you don't need a car for it.
Speaker 2: You don't, you don't. You just need to be there.
Speaker 4: Linnae Venee is a writer, poet, and content creator whose
Speaker 4: social media series Parking Lot Pimping seeks to inform and
Speaker 4: educate Americans, especially US US, about the social and political
Speaker 4: issues affecting our communities and the world as a whole.
Speaker 2: The series is posted on.
Speaker 4: Fridays, and, as Lenae says at the beginning of each video,
Speaker 4: she's always keeping it very black and very brief, which
Speaker 4: I appreciate. Parking Lot fin Ben has been so influential
Speaker 4: in getting black Americans informed that the Vice President Kamala
Speaker 4: Harris made an appearance earlier this year to talk about
Speaker 4: gun reform.
Speaker 2: Baby credits Okay.
Speaker 4: The series has gained Lenae to and double ACP Image
Speaker 4: Award nominations, and she's here to talk to us today.
Speaker 3: Clap if a clap trip were gonna be mad at a cloud,
Speaker 3: but I am.
Speaker 1: We are so proud of you, proud to have you
Speaker 1: here like this is just I'm ana get out of
Speaker 1: your way, and I want to ask you a question.
Speaker 1: Our content the engagement dropped when we started to speak
Speaker 1: on socio political issues. As someone who is primarily in
Speaker 1: that arena, why do you think that happens when quote
Speaker 1: unquote entertainers, Because we I consider us to be entertainers.
Speaker 3: When entertainers choose to.
Speaker 1: Show people how they feel about political issues, why is
Speaker 1: it like a dismissal.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I think it's really interesting, And I also think
Speaker 6: you hit the nail on the head, especially during the
Speaker 6: time you guys specifically released that season. I do agree
Speaker 6: people probably wanted to break, but also because you established
Speaker 6: yourselves in a pop culture realm, I do believe people
Speaker 6: might have felt disrupted in a way because they might
Speaker 6: have come to you as for some type of relief
Speaker 6: or release and just to be entertained. And another big
Speaker 6: thing is, for a very long time, our people have
Speaker 6: felt very distance from politics.
Speaker 5: And it's really.
Speaker 6: Interesting because I've been a scholar of a lover of
Speaker 6: black history all my life life and it wasn't really
Speaker 6: until I left my master's program and I began to see,
Speaker 6: as you said, all the things we've been.
Speaker 5: Hit with since twenty twenty.
Speaker 6: I guess experiencing it as an adult on my own,
Speaker 6: Lord Jesus, they gave it a different coloring for me.
Speaker 6: But it's surprising, to say the least, that that has
Speaker 6: actually been with the bulk of our contribution to American
Speaker 6: history has been in politics, but absolutely still because we
Speaker 6: have not yet achieved all the freedoms we want to achieve.
Speaker 6: That has caused a lot of discontent and wilful distancing
Speaker 6: in our communities from politics. And so I think during
Speaker 6: that time in specific, we were getting a lot of
Speaker 6: people on the train. We were getting them to understand
Speaker 6: you have to be versed, you have to know what's
Speaker 6: going on so you can step up to the table,
Speaker 6: so you can be informed, so you can be on
Speaker 6: with language all the things. It's just it's hard because
Speaker 6: even as we're doing that, even as we see this
Speaker 6: influx of so many young black creatives really getting engaged
Speaker 6: in the conversation, we're still men with the people in
Speaker 6: the comments sections. I'm not voting on more because no
Speaker 6: matter how I vote, and there re turns out how
Speaker 6: I need to and I'm not doing no less of
Speaker 6: two evils.
Speaker 5: And I get it, I really do. We are having to.
Speaker 6: Do a lot of unlearning and enfranchising ourselves, and it's
Speaker 6: just hard to do. It's hard to do, especially when
Speaker 6: politics has always been seen as a quote unquote white
Speaker 6: people think, you know, and it can't be that anymore.
Speaker 6: It can't be that anymore.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, Yeah.
Speaker 4: I think earlier, well, earlier this season, based off of
Speaker 4: when this episode is airing, we did talk about celebrity
Speaker 4: influence and them having a say when it comes to
Speaker 4: using their platforms, particularly when it's comes to politics. Right so,
Speaker 4: for right now, for example, what the war happening. People
Speaker 4: are looking at certain people of influence with platforms that
Speaker 4: have millions of followers to take a stance, whether it's
Speaker 4: picking a side, whether it's you know, towing the line,
Speaker 4: whatever it is that they're doing, they're looking for that,
Speaker 4: and I think what we did, particularly in twenty twenty,
Speaker 4: we didn't want to come across as being tone deaf.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 4: It's like, read the room that you're in right now, Well,
Speaker 4: how can you just talk about sex and marriage and
Speaker 4: frollicking around.
Speaker 2: When the world is literally crumbling around you?
Speaker 4: So for us to avoid that, we felt like it
Speaker 4: was just our duty to not necessarily take a stide
Speaker 4: or to be divisive, which tends to happen a lot
Speaker 4: when you do even try to just educate people in
Speaker 4: you know, a post or giving information. And I love
Speaker 4: that when I look at your page and I come
Speaker 4: to your page, it's usually for educational purposes because I
Speaker 4: may not understand the jargon ladened you know, terms that
Speaker 4: happen with politics. So I think if people are approaching
Speaker 4: it with more of a let me educate myself kind
Speaker 4: of perspectives versus let me go to the comments to
Speaker 4: be divisive, it'll be a lot it'll be a lot
Speaker 4: more beneficial. But you know, in that moment, we just
Speaker 4: were like, how do we avoid like not talking.
Speaker 2: About the elephant in the room when the elephant is
Speaker 2: in the room?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 2: You know? Have you had yours like that even on
Speaker 2: your platform.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm actually struggling with it right now, and I'll
Speaker 6: give some more context to that in just a second.
Speaker 6: But of all the posts that I'm seeing, of all
Speaker 6: the posts that I'm seeing that are showing a lot
Speaker 6: of violence that's going on, that are infographics of what
Speaker 6: sides are talking about, what what might be true and
Speaker 6: what isn't. I will tell you the most powerful meme,
Speaker 6: so to speak, that I've seen is a picture that says,
Speaker 6: I think the elephant ties the room together. And I
Speaker 6: thought this spoke volumes because especially with someone like a
Speaker 6: platform myself, especially you guys, it's just minorities in America.
Speaker 6: You know, more often than not that the elephant that's
Speaker 6: in the room is I think that needs to be
Speaker 6: tackled so the room can be at peace. So the
Speaker 6: room can be peaceful, you know, And people are saying
Speaker 6: that they want peace on earth, and it's just really
Speaker 6: difficult for people to say what they want to say
Speaker 6: because the reality is their politics can be tied to
Speaker 6: their careers. And so right now when I say that
Speaker 6: I'm struggling with it on my own platform, you know,
Speaker 6: I have a podcast where I'm connected to to other
Speaker 6: creators and while we all aren't supportive of all the
Speaker 6: things that we're in support of because our podcast kind
Speaker 6: of it is a extension of the park of my
Speaker 6: Pamphan brand, but all of us have roots, and whether
Speaker 6: it's black studies or advocacy and all the things, I
Speaker 6: can't just allow my statements to color what.
Speaker 5: They got going on.
Speaker 6: Also, also, I work with people, and while I'm thinking
Speaker 6: about the webs that I'm connected and I'm also really
Speaker 6: thinking about what my spirit wants me to do, and
Speaker 6: what I'm being led just to me in this moment.
Speaker 6: So I think a lot of people are making the
Speaker 6: best choices that they can and I can't speak for
Speaker 6: anybody else's choices, you know. I've been taking a minute
Speaker 6: myself to craft how I want to say what I
Speaker 6: want to say, because you just have to.
Speaker 5: It's not a time to be.
Speaker 2: Quiet, right for sure?
Speaker 1: Right, I have a question, Okay, where do you because
Speaker 1: a lot of people ask me this all the time,
Speaker 1: where do you get your information?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 1: Denzel Washington had a quote that said, if you if
Speaker 1: you watch the news, you're misinformed, But if you don't
Speaker 1: watch the news, you're uninformed, you know, And then he
Speaker 1: asked reporters. He said, you know what, what a a
Speaker 1: great responsibility you have to tell the truth. And we're
Speaker 1: living in an age now where the truth is not
Speaker 1: as important as being first, Like it's just let's be first.
Speaker 1: Let's get the information out first, and even if it's
Speaker 1: not true, well we got it out first, so we
Speaker 1: get the clicks. Where do you find your information to
Speaker 1: know and stay informed and know that the information I
Speaker 1: got is the right information?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Because I mean, you have pretty much essentially created a
Speaker 4: new version of news media. You know, that makes it
Speaker 4: super digestible for us, and we haven't seen anything like
Speaker 4: that before really, So, like, what made you? Also, I
Speaker 4: guess to piggyback on Davow's question, what made you create
Speaker 4: parking lot pimping? Like, just give us an overview about
Speaker 4: what it is that your platform is.
Speaker 6: So what made me create parking lot Pimping, honestly was
Speaker 6: a desire to see black people really be there for
Speaker 6: one another. Regardless about the things that I've learned about
Speaker 6: racism in this country, I've discovered that it's been most
Speaker 6: successful at dividing our communities, whether it's on the basis
Speaker 6: of sex, gender, sexuality, class, all the things.
Speaker 5: And as much as we want.
Speaker 6: To talk about the white man being the issue, the
Speaker 6: white man has done a lot of things in our
Speaker 6: own neighborhoods that we have to attend to before we
Speaker 6: can be a united front. So I started the parking
Speaker 6: lot to inform my inform my audience on historical things
Speaker 6: that have taken place that make our communities valuable period
Speaker 6: and pulling back the wool over.
Speaker 5: Age old adages about what certain.
Speaker 6: Groups of people are capable of, whether or not, they
Speaker 6: are valuable.
Speaker 5: In our communities. And so that's where it started.
Speaker 6: And then as I started to see whether it was
Speaker 6: in the news or social media, these different topics taking
Speaker 6: over the headlines and starting these dialogues, I said, okay,
Speaker 6: well I can use I can be informed what's going
Speaker 6: on in the news and use these content pieces as
Speaker 6: opportunities to connect what is going on throughout history to
Speaker 6: make my point hit home all the more. And that
Speaker 6: is actually when I saw my content spike. So to
Speaker 6: your point, I'm always looking in the headlines. I actually
Speaker 6: have a writing team now. I've got a researcher who's
Speaker 6: a journalist and a writing partner as well to help
Speaker 6: me just make sure that I am. If I'm traveling
Speaker 6: or anything, I'm still abreast of what's going on, and
Speaker 6: I have all the most up to date information, and
Speaker 6: so I'm looking in the news to see.
Speaker 5: What I can pull from.
Speaker 6: But more importantly, what I think I can tell the
Speaker 6: best story about, And not just tell a story as
Speaker 6: in makeup something, but what narrative can.
Speaker 5: I craft that I can be proud of that I
Speaker 5: know is.
Speaker 6: Verified information and all those things, and what I can
Speaker 6: say that has the most impact from my audience. And
Speaker 6: so with that, then all three of us also have
Speaker 6: master's degrees in African American studies. We pull from our
Speaker 6: peer reviewed literature. We pulled from books that have been
Speaker 6: certified by the scholarship things to pad that information to
Speaker 6: make sure that we're doing due diligence.
Speaker 5: So it's a two way street for sure.
Speaker 3: That's great.
Speaker 1: So you get your history from certified outlets. History makes
Speaker 1: most that makes the most sense. The biggest issue that
Speaker 1: people are running into now is do I listen to CNN?
Speaker 1: Do I listen to Fox? Do I listen to MSNBC?
Speaker 1: Like which newspapers do I read? Because now the biggest
Speaker 1: thing is everything is fake news. It's all propaganda. So
Speaker 1: my biggest concern is trying to answer people who ask
Speaker 1: me the question like where aval where do you get
Speaker 1: your news if you can't trust anything you watch? And
Speaker 1: I want to ask you because you are way more
Speaker 1: educated on this than I am. And I also feel
Speaker 1: safe in saying that we have a guest on the
Speaker 1: show who does her due diligence not only for history
Speaker 1: but also current events. Where do you get your news
Speaker 1: and find out about information and things? That's happening now.
Speaker 6: Yeah, so I pay a lot of attention to the
Speaker 6: discussion around my sources as well, like what their credibility
Speaker 6: has been in the history, and whether it's the history
Speaker 6: of someone's brand or history period. It's always going to
Speaker 6: be revealing to you about whether or not you can
Speaker 6: trust the source of information. And so, for instance, just
Speaker 6: taking it back to twenty twenty, if you're at a rally,
Speaker 6: not you don't even have to be at the rally.
Speaker 6: If you're on Fox News and they're planing clip of
Speaker 6: Trump saying whatever about the good people in Charleston, South
Speaker 6: Carolina who just fand somebody over with a car, you
Speaker 6: can look at the history of the good people in
Speaker 6: South Carolina and let them know that no, that was
Speaker 6: actually factually racist, you know. So it's those kinds of
Speaker 6: things you just you have to be a little bit
Speaker 6: more well informed about the history of the thing before
Speaker 6: you can just make an opinion on what people are
Speaker 6: saying about it right now. And I think that is
Speaker 6: the determining factor because it is difficult and what I
Speaker 6: can say that so far, sources that I've pulled from
Speaker 6: that I trust are people like MPR, the Acluvox the
Speaker 6: Washington Post.
Speaker 5: It can get iffy.
Speaker 6: So you've got to make sure that you are giving
Speaker 6: yourself an opportunity to see what folks are saying about
Speaker 6: the issue itself, because things are also complex. And I
Speaker 6: think that's the best thing about my platform and also
Speaker 6: what I encourage others to do, and that's embraced the
Speaker 6: nuance of situations and understand that.
Speaker 5: Not everything is cut and dry.
Speaker 1: Right, Okay, So I didn't want to say some want
Speaker 1: to hear you saying, but I had gotten some flak
Speaker 1: from some of my friends because I do watch CNN,
Speaker 1: but I also watch Fox, so watch MSNBC because like you,
Speaker 1: I'm like, we have to understand the nuance, right, And
Speaker 1: when people speak like you said, go look at the
Speaker 1: history of that person. Go look at the history of
Speaker 1: their their words, and have they spoken fallacies in the past,
Speaker 1: because then you can see if they spoken fallacies in
Speaker 1: the past, this may not be someone I really want
Speaker 1: to you know, hold as a credible source. But that
Speaker 1: doesn't mean everyone on every source is discredible or is
Speaker 1: that not even a word discreditable you.
Speaker 3: Know or not or not credible?
Speaker 2: You incredible?
Speaker 3: But I do the same thing.
Speaker 1: I'll watch Fox for a couple hours and see what's
Speaker 1: going on on that side. I'll watch THEE and and
Speaker 1: I'll watch MSNBC.
Speaker 4: I would love to know Lenney what your process is like,
Speaker 4: because when you're trying to unpack and then try to
Speaker 4: find a way to deliver what can be very daunting,
Speaker 4: complex information that can also be very touchy depending on
Speaker 4: like who's listening and what their stances, delivery is everything.
Speaker 4: And you know, we always talk about with our team
Speaker 4: just how we use the gear to make the gifts
Speaker 4: that you've been given to make them work for you.
Speaker 2: And I know that you do have a background in
Speaker 2: poetry as well.
Speaker 4: And how do you find that being a poet has
Speaker 4: kind of led you to be this kind of social
Speaker 4: media educator. Do you think it's better received or well
Speaker 4: received based off of how you deliver it?
Speaker 3: Absolutely?
Speaker 5: Yeah, sure and go ahead.
Speaker 3: Oh no, I just I'm gonna be honest.
Speaker 1: When I when I first came to your page, it
Speaker 1: was the flow in which the information was coming out,
Speaker 1: which is made me pay attention right right, because you
Speaker 1: could you could be very knowledgeable, would be a dry
Speaker 1: talking head.
Speaker 2: Well that's true.
Speaker 4: You know, I listened to all of your videos at
Speaker 4: least two or three times, just because at first I'm
Speaker 4: just like, she's so eloquent.
Speaker 2: I love the way she said that the flow is.
Speaker 4: Great, Like I look at that portion of it first,
Speaker 4: and then I have to go back and what did
Speaker 4: she really say? You know, and just be able to
Speaker 4: like unpack it and digest it. So was that like
Speaker 4: a major influence in how you started parking lot pimping?
Speaker 2: And yeah, information?
Speaker 6: And it's interesting you use the words of major influence
Speaker 6: because I think in transit absolutely did I think about it. No,
Speaker 6: I actually critiqued myself because, especially since I started the
Speaker 6: parking lot, I had not had intimate time with my journal,
Speaker 6: just literally writing poetry unless someone was asking me to
Speaker 6: do it. For it, even unless I was getting paid
Speaker 6: for it, wasn't something I felt that I was still
Speaker 6: honing my craft on until I got a lot of
Speaker 6: feedback that my photo my videos do feel like poetry
Speaker 6: for the listener and the audience, and paying attention to
Speaker 6: my delivery was always something intentional, because, as you said,
Speaker 6: you can be informed, but you can also be a draft.
Speaker 5: I was a high school.
Speaker 6: Teacher for two and a half years, and one thing
Speaker 6: a high school kid is going to let you do
Speaker 6: is know if you're wat.
Speaker 4: Y that because I was not the history head at
Speaker 4: all in school.
Speaker 2: I mean, to me, it was just dry, dry, dry drive.
Speaker 4: Look, I totally disconnected when it came to social studies
Speaker 4: and things like that.
Speaker 2: But deal, so where were you when I was in
Speaker 2: high school history?
Speaker 6: And where are you in high school?
Speaker 3: She was six?
Speaker 5: Y'all?
Speaker 2: How to age me like that? God damn? So is
Speaker 2: there a patique?
Speaker 4: I don't know if you had a follow up question
Speaker 4: or not, but I'm just like feeling the flow of
Speaker 4: where we're going here speaking about African American history and
Speaker 4: all that.
Speaker 2: Like what keeps you inspired the most?
Speaker 4: Because it can just be a lot, especially during the
Speaker 4: time and like all of the noise, Is there anything
Speaker 4: that keeps you inspired or just you it makes you
Speaker 4: want to keep going in times like this.
Speaker 6: I think it's two things, and I don't want to
Speaker 6: get too deep on you, but it's just one of
Speaker 6: my heart right now. But the first thing is that
Speaker 6: I love us for real, Like we say that as
Speaker 6: a joke, but I am absolutely in love with black people.
Speaker 6: I have enamored with what we've been able to do
Speaker 6: on this earth, and I am in all of all
Speaker 6: the gifts that we've been given and the circumstances that
Speaker 6: we've had.
Speaker 5: So that's one thing, yes, And.
Speaker 6: The second thing is that it's just honestly something I'm
Speaker 6: called to do, you know. Oh, like conviction very heavy
Speaker 6: in my spirit, that this is something that we can't
Speaker 6: see an into right now, but if we were to
Speaker 6: give up, well, our progeny will never see an endo it.
Speaker 5: So I'm very inspired.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you why that's deep. But that's very
Speaker 1: very important. Right during the mix of all that, I
Speaker 1: wrote a book, a children's book called the Elyssis the
Speaker 1: Elysis in the Time Machine, Why do we have to
Speaker 1: say black lives matter? And pretty much it was a
Speaker 1: historical journey where my character traveled back in time with
Speaker 1: my sons and my wife and we explained to them,
Speaker 1: from slavery to black holes to Jim Crow, why we
Speaker 1: have to say black lives matter? But what you said
Speaker 1: resonated with me so much. I love being black so much.
Speaker 1: Not because of all the things people think blackness is,
Speaker 1: Oh he's athletic, Oh, the sexual prowess of a black
Speaker 1: man and a black woman. No, I love being black because,
Speaker 1: if you know, our history and know everything that we've
Speaker 1: gone through to understand the resilis that exist in us
Speaker 1: as a people makes me love my people like I
Speaker 1: legitimately feel like I can do whatever I want to do.
Speaker 1: We took the twenty three and meter tests and I
Speaker 1: found out that my ancestors are eighty percent Nigerian. Eighty
Speaker 1: percent Nigerian, but they actually walked in the trail of
Speaker 1: tears after the slaves were freed in eighteen sixty.
Speaker 3: Five, and it just made me proud.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, whereas as so many other people would
Speaker 1: feel like dang I was my ancestors we sold Oh no, yeah,
Speaker 1: we walked miles west. We walked miles west to survive
Speaker 1: and then build what we have now. So I understand what.
Speaker 1: I understand what you were saying by being free but
Speaker 1: being deep.
Speaker 3: I get it. But go ahead, I want to cut
Speaker 3: you a guest.
Speaker 5: And so it's fine.
Speaker 6: And it's funny that you say that, because I was
Speaker 6: having a conversation with someone and being funny but being
Speaker 6: all the way serious at the same time. I said,
Speaker 6: Harriet Tubman made I don't know how many trips up
Speaker 6: in dynasty down to states frame people.
Speaker 5: You're gonna waste her time, for.
Speaker 6: We're gonna waste all the people for us time who
Speaker 6: spent so much time and effort less waiting tears for
Speaker 6: us to be able to sit.
Speaker 5: Here today and talk on the podcast.
Speaker 6: Huh. And so that's I feel like I can't waste time.
Speaker 6: And then also just knowing what we do here today
Speaker 6: is what's going to be propelling the future generations of us.
Speaker 6: So that's why I keep doing it. But to your point,
Speaker 6: it is very exhausting, and I've had to take my
Speaker 6: own hiatuses And actually I've spent the last year investing
Speaker 6: my time and energy and developing a self care brand.
Speaker 5: People have been telling me to make tea.
Speaker 6: So I'm finally making teas, but since to release this
Speaker 6: holiday season, and I got to be in community with
Speaker 6: women who are glagiche And if you're not familiar, those
Speaker 6: are our sensions of the people here in America that
Speaker 6: were able to retain all of their Western African West
Speaker 6: African influence from the period of slavery. Because in Georgetown,
Speaker 6: South Carolina is where the majority live today, but also
Speaker 6: in some offshoot islands on the coast. But if you
Speaker 6: know anything about the different regions of slavery, they grew
Speaker 6: different things, and in that region that grew rice. And
Speaker 6: the way in which you grow rice in large scale
Speaker 6: is very dangerous. It is dangerous in terms of the infrastructure,
Speaker 6: but also what the slave people were exposed to. And
Speaker 6: so the lifespan of an enslaved person there was only
Speaker 6: seven years, seven years of labor. But I say all
Speaker 6: that to say is why people didn't want to be
Speaker 6: in the mix risk in their lives. And so there
Speaker 6: were far less overseers, far more people, and big far
Speaker 6: less people in big houses micro managing them. They had
Speaker 6: task systems, so as long as they met their quotas,
Speaker 6: they left them alone and they were free to continue
Speaker 6: their traditions, cultures, food stuffs and all the things. And
Speaker 6: so those women have helped me launch a brand, and
Speaker 6: I definitely know that I'll be tapping into other cultures
Speaker 6: and the diaspora to help make my tees. But not
Speaker 6: only is it the tea's at the teacups, it's candles
Speaker 6: and back tea as well for you to and certain
Speaker 6: nerves and pice and all the things. So that has
Speaker 6: also been a part of my story, like yes we
Speaker 6: have to continue the good fight, Yes we were made
Speaker 6: with resilience in mind, but we also have to rest
Speaker 6: and repair ourselves if we're going to keep going.
Speaker 1: So, so look real quick, I know, I know you
Speaker 1: get a lot of praise and learn from our people,
Speaker 1: but I also know when you probably don't post abody it,
Speaker 1: you probably do get hate.
Speaker 3: From the other side.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm talking to Okay, So how do you deal
Speaker 1: with and how do you decide with regardless of whether
Speaker 1: the hate comes from people who look like me or
Speaker 1: don't look like me, how do you decide how you're
Speaker 1: going to keep going and if you're going to keep going.
Speaker 6: Uh, those comments don't really have a place I think
Speaker 6: as a human. They hurt sometimes, they hurt my feelings.
Speaker 6: Sometimes they're just laughable, but they have no place in
Speaker 6: what I got going on. You know, I had a
Speaker 6: conversation I was able to bless enough to have dinner
Speaker 6: with Mistab and I was just talking to her about
Speaker 6: Tabitha Brown. I was talking to her about my season
Speaker 6: in life and acting with integrity and being honest, and
Speaker 6: she said that honesty is other people's problem, not yours.
Speaker 5: And so that encouraged me in a big way, because
Speaker 5: if I do feel that I'm.
Speaker 6: Putting my best foot forward and I'm sharing truth that
Speaker 6: honesty and truth and the inability to deal with it.
Speaker 5: It's not my problem. My goal is just to put
Speaker 5: it out there to start conversation. And I think that
Speaker 5: even that.
Speaker 6: Brings me to something else that you didn't ask me,
Speaker 6: But it's just in my mind to talk about it.
Speaker 6: We got to know what our roles are. Some of
Speaker 6: us are not marshals in the street. Some of us
Speaker 6: are not policy advocates. Some of us don't lobby in courtrooms.
Speaker 6: Some of us do the educating, and that's okay. And
Speaker 6: people on either side are also going to have a
Speaker 6: problem with how you engage in the fight, but that's
Speaker 6: their problem, that's not yours. And you're gonna be confident
Speaker 6: in how you show up.
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 4: I love that you've figured out where you fall in
Speaker 4: this ecosystem of change, right because we're always trying to
Speaker 4: scramble to figure out what that was. And I think,
Speaker 4: particularly back in twenty twenty, it was just like, man,
Speaker 4: if you're not saying anything on social media, people thought
Speaker 4: like you're not saying anything, much like even now, if
Speaker 4: they say you know you're silent, you're complicit, like you know,
Speaker 4: you don't stand for something, you're kind of toning the line.
Speaker 4: So I love that you found where you are in
Speaker 4: that ecosystem, but I've always wondered just to kind of
Speaker 4: change pace a little bit.
Speaker 2: Why the parking lot? Like how did that come up?
Speaker 5: Girl? You know?
Speaker 6: Let me tell you, anybody who's ever wanted to do something,
Speaker 6: my story is epitome of just do it. Literally, just
Speaker 6: do it and everything will fall into place. And the
Speaker 6: only reason why even one outside is because I was
Speaker 6: going to start my show on YouTube and it was
Speaker 6: going to be a little bit longer, but I said,
Speaker 6: how can I stand out from people who are doing
Speaker 6: videos in front of their desk, in front of their bed, Yeah,
Speaker 6: you know, doing.
Speaker 5: The lifestyle type things.
Speaker 6: And I was like, I want people to scroll class
Speaker 6: and be like, what's she doing in her parking lot?
Speaker 5: And like that's it's all the way.
Speaker 6: All of it was a strategy to get folks attention
Speaker 6: and keep those attention because to the Vale's point earlier,
Speaker 6: I already knew coming in that people felt like they
Speaker 6: already knew everything they was to know about black history
Speaker 6: and it's just not true. And also everybody that they
Speaker 6: hear it from is either trying to push something down
Speaker 6: their throat or just communicating the way they cannot relate to.
Speaker 6: And that's also where I'm gonna keep a black Keep
Speaker 6: it Brief came from because after I think I made
Speaker 6: a longer video it was like maybe nine minutes. It
Speaker 6: was terrible, but my boyfriend and I were talking about
Speaker 6: how the attention spent attention spent isn't there.
Speaker 1: For my brand new conceast six minutes, right, And what
Speaker 1: he said.
Speaker 6: To me is that you should do something short on
Speaker 6: Instagram and then tell them to come to YouTube. And
Speaker 6: I was like, no, because they're not going to do
Speaker 6: that either. I need to do it all within these
Speaker 6: three minutes on Instagram.
Speaker 5: Yes, So that's where I'm going to keep it back.
Speaker 5: Keep it brief came from.
Speaker 1: Your genius for that. I'm gonna tell you how old
Speaker 1: are you if you don't mind me asking. Twenty eight, So
Speaker 1: you're ten years my junior.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 1: But literally it was the same process we went through
Speaker 1: with content. Literally it was we have to create content
Speaker 1: that people want to see, right. So at first it
Speaker 1: was like, let's create short videos and send them to YouTube.
Speaker 1: But it was like nah, because even on YouTube, they're
Speaker 1: not gonna look past six.
Speaker 2: Minutes, right exactly, And the analytics.
Speaker 1: Show the point was three to four minutes. You can
Speaker 1: make a video three to four minutes. You can keep
Speaker 1: people's attention span and they'll share it. So it's amazing
Speaker 1: to me that at twenty eight you were able to
Speaker 1: figure that out. I was a little bit old, butive,
Speaker 1: just do it.
Speaker 3: I was twenty five.
Speaker 2: Just do it so insanely wise.
Speaker 4: And I mean I was talking about this pre show,
Speaker 4: but Leney and I actually met, I think for the
Speaker 4: first time in person at a Target event at Essence Festival,
Speaker 4: and it was just something about your spirit and your energy,
Speaker 4: and I'm just like, I know, I want to see
Speaker 4: her again, and I have to see her again, and
Speaker 4: we're gonna have to get her on the podcast because
Speaker 4: just your energy and your space in that room and
Speaker 4: how sure you were of yourself, like that was just
Speaker 4: enough to have me.
Speaker 2: I didn't in touch with many women.
Speaker 4: I mean, there was a room full of amazing women,
Speaker 4: but I'm just saying someone who I know I wanted
Speaker 4: to be in their presence again. So I just love that,
Speaker 4: and I salute you says for knowing at twenty five
Speaker 4: that this was something that you, you know, were called to
Speaker 4: do and sitting in that.
Speaker 6: It's so funny that you say that, because I'm just
Speaker 6: remembering exactly where we met, and that was at the.
Speaker 5: Brunch for Target.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yes, girl.
Speaker 5: When I tell you I was in samples that day.
Speaker 6: Really, the stylist that I had, it just didn't correlate
Speaker 6: where we were going.
Speaker 5: And I just when I walked in that room, when
Speaker 5: we were there with.
Speaker 6: All of these big names and icons, I was like,
Speaker 6: I'm in here looking like a harlet. Nobody's gonna take me.
Speaker 5: Seriously. I got like try to fix myself.
Speaker 6: And it's so funny because when it was time to speak,
Speaker 6: I said, oh, I get to.
Speaker 5: Say something, and now everybody will know that I'm serious.
Speaker 4: Baby, baby, It's so funny how you were internalizing that
Speaker 4: because I never would have been able to tell first off.
Speaker 2: But yeah, but the many you opened your mouth to speak.
Speaker 4: I was just like, oh my goodness, like this this
Speaker 4: girl has something to say.
Speaker 2: And I was listening and I'm super happy.
Speaker 3: I wish I was there, Hea, you know it.
Speaker 2: Was it was for the girls, it was for.
Speaker 3: The Sorry I could still wish I could still Man, Yeah, speaking,
Speaker 3: and that's what was there.
Speaker 4: TAB wasn't at that event, and we were there with
Speaker 4: I think Jasmine Guy along.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was a really really great space to be.
Speaker 4: Yeah, shout out to Essence Fest for always curating spaces
Speaker 4: you know, and and arenas for us to get together
Speaker 4: and love on each other and inspire each other. Like
Speaker 4: that's amazing. So I know that you are an artist
Speaker 4: that does many things. So before we wrap up, because
Speaker 4: I feel like, you know, we can totally unpack and
Speaker 4: have back for like some specific I would love.
Speaker 1: To have because we're going through an election yeah this year,
Speaker 1: and I'd rather have someone speak on what we as
Speaker 1: the black community need to be focusing on.
Speaker 2: Oh, for sure, I would.
Speaker 3: I would love to have for back it.
Speaker 2: So definitely pin us on your calend for sure.
Speaker 4: But I know that you're a poet, you're a writer,
Speaker 4: you're an actress, you are a educator, so many things.
Speaker 2: You know, what do you see next for yourself? What
Speaker 2: do you see in your future? Only twenty eight?
Speaker 4: I feel like you are on the cusp of like
Speaker 4: this is just the precipice of like your your your
Speaker 4: ability and your greatness. So is there anything that you
Speaker 4: foresee other than your tea's coming out in the holiday season.
Speaker 3: What do you want to do?
Speaker 6: You know, what do I want to do? I've always
Speaker 6: wanted to tell stories. I've always wanted to tell stories
Speaker 6: with education at the center and at the helm, but
Speaker 6: trick people into learning something. I like to really lace
Speaker 6: a really good narrative with information, and not just information,
Speaker 6: but experiences that expose people to new perspectives.
Speaker 5: And so that's what I want to do with TV.
Speaker 6: That's what I want to do with any book project
Speaker 6: that I'm working on.
Speaker 5: That's what I want to do.
Speaker 6: Like I said, the roots of my self care brand
Speaker 6: is also based in that.
Speaker 5: So that's what I want to do all around. And
Speaker 5: I see an empire on its way, you.
Speaker 3: Know, yes, ma'am, Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 4: It's giving, film director, writer, producer. Yeah, you better own it,
Speaker 4: own it and walk in it. I love that. I
Speaker 4: love that for you. Do you have anything else you
Speaker 4: want to ask the neighbors, But we.
Speaker 3: Don't have enough time. But I love history.
Speaker 1: I love history like I do, and I would sit
Speaker 1: here and talk to you about history all day long.
Speaker 1: But I do want to dedicate a full podcast to
Speaker 1: talking about politics and what we can look forward to
Speaker 1: going into this next election year.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So, Jenny, I just want to tell you that.
Speaker 1: I appreciate you so much for what you do, for
Speaker 1: what you do because you don't know how many of
Speaker 1: your videos get shared amongst the young the young people
Speaker 1: that I mentor and they'll send me because we always
Speaker 1: send each other books and stuff, but it's always your
Speaker 1: videos like you check this out, look what she said
Speaker 1: here look like and.
Speaker 3: Young men and young women. Because I think you.
Speaker 1: Have a unique voice that for the next decade will
Speaker 1: be the voice of how we as a as a
Speaker 1: generation are changing, right, are changing the culture, changing the
Speaker 1: way we view the world, changing the way we view politics. Yes,
Speaker 1: and I feel like you're a thought leader in that.
Speaker 1: So I just want to say thank you, We appreciate you,
Speaker 1: and we're gonna keep in touch because on the next
Speaker 1: podcast we have, we're gonna talk.
Speaker 4: About we're over here raising four black boys in today's world,
Speaker 4: which is no easy feat.
Speaker 2: You know, it gives me.
Speaker 4: I can't speak for the val but it just gives
Speaker 4: me anxiety, you know, just thinking about this world that
Speaker 4: we're putting them into.
Speaker 2: But what we're very deliberate about.
Speaker 4: We even did a travel show on Go USA where
Speaker 4: we took the boys to Birmingham, Alabama, and we went
Speaker 4: to the Sixteenth Street Church, and we went to the
Speaker 4: Rice Museum. And we're very deliberate about making our boys
Speaker 4: immersing them in history and culture so they know exactly
Speaker 4: who they are and they know that they're equipped to
Speaker 4: do all the things because they can do all the things,
Speaker 4: because why they come from people who've done all the
Speaker 4: things given the circumstances. So I'm looking to looking forward
Speaker 4: to continuing to learn from you and being a sponge
Speaker 4: and then in turn being a vessel to be able
Speaker 4: to educate my children. Like you said, the work we're
Speaker 4: doing now is not We're not going to feel the
Speaker 4: benefits maybe our generation, but hope we're hoping for generations
Speaker 4: to come. So I thank you for your work, Lenee.
Speaker 4: We celebrate you today on that ass podcast.
Speaker 3: Let us know. Let everybody know where they can find you,
Speaker 3: where they can find you.
Speaker 6: On the internets at you know, you can get hit
Speaker 6: to my brand launch at bain by l V dot com.
Speaker 5: That's b A N E L what b LV.
Speaker 2: I know, you know what, you know what's going.
Speaker 6: On over here, So just come by to find out
Speaker 6: what we're talking about this week.
Speaker 3: Amazing much.
Speaker 4: We'll be back, all right, girl, take care, all right,
Speaker 4: So we're back all right. That was a great segment
Speaker 4: with Lenae. I'm just so impressed by her. I told
Speaker 4: you that time I met her at the Essence Fest
Speaker 4: brunch for Target.
Speaker 2: It was just a good time.
Speaker 1: To me to have the mental fortitude and the awareness
Speaker 1: to say at twenty five that this is my calling,
Speaker 1: this is what I need to do, and to actually
Speaker 1: put forth the effort to get it done.
Speaker 4: Having the idea and doing it because people, you know,
Speaker 4: we meet people that are at forty trying to figure
Speaker 4: out what they're trying to do, you know, So it's
Speaker 4: a blessing to know and to execute.
Speaker 2: So shout out to our girl LINEE.
Speaker 4: We're going to move into listening letters now because we
Speaker 4: want to hear from y'all, and we will dive right
Speaker 4: into the first one.
Speaker 2: You want to go first, babe, I'll go first. Go
Speaker 2: for it.
Speaker 3: What's up, beautiful people?
Speaker 5: Was ah.
Speaker 3: I'm such a huge support of you guys. Thank you
Speaker 3: so much.
Speaker 1: AnyWho, how was it for you guys navigating through your
Speaker 1: relationships so young? Me and my boyfriend have been together
Speaker 1: since we were seventeen, we are now two. We really
Speaker 1: don't have anyone who's been together since they were young.
Speaker 1: What advice do you.
Speaker 3: Have, Carol?
Speaker 2: Are you new to the show?
Speaker 4: We're twelve seasons and talking about this, and you know,
Speaker 4: if you haven't heard yet, we have a New York
Speaker 4: Times bestselling books called We over Meet, the Counterintuitive Approach
Speaker 4: Again and Everything you Want out of Your Relationship Facts,
Speaker 4: And we literally talk about the inception of Kadeen and
Speaker 4: Devou because not for nothing, a lot of people see
Speaker 4: us now and they're just like, I want a relationship
Speaker 4: like yours, I want a marriage like yours. Like what
Speaker 4: did y'all do to get to hear? And this is
Speaker 4: twenty one years in the making, y'all? So I think
Speaker 4: a good place to start because this is a loaded question.
Speaker 4: I mean, we probably can give a cliff notes version
Speaker 4: of the advice, but we unpack so many things that
Speaker 4: we talk about in the book because it talks about
Speaker 4: the meeting of two people who come from similar but
Speaker 4: also different backgrounds, how our childhood, our parents, our families
Speaker 4: helped to shape who we were as individuals, and then
Speaker 4: trying to grow as individuals and as young people.
Speaker 3: You've been watching the doc? Oh the doc?
Speaker 1: Have you been watching the doc, young lady? Yeah, Love
Speaker 1: Against the World doc has been on a Patreon. You
Speaker 1: subscribe to Patreon. That's the bigger ques because all the
Speaker 1: answers is in the dock and you get the book.
Speaker 1: You can get the book, putting on your lap and
Speaker 1: watch the doc while listening to the podcast simultaneously.
Speaker 4: There goes references three sources for BAM.
Speaker 1: But but if you had to answer the question, ask
Speaker 1: each other what you need, what you require, and if
Speaker 1: you love each other, keep working to be there for
Speaker 1: each other. Don't listen to nobody else. Nobody else's opinions
Speaker 1: don't matter. Don't try to emulate nobody else. You will
Speaker 1: never be the valand Kadean. You shouldn't want to be
Speaker 1: the valand Kadean because the valent Kadeen don't want to
Speaker 1: be nobody else, and we don't want nobody.
Speaker 3: Else to be like us, period.
Speaker 1: So talk to each other, young lady, you twenty two,
Speaker 1: that's your best friend, you his best friend. Y'all get together,
Speaker 1: collab on what you want life to be like and
Speaker 1: get it done.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 3: See how I did that?
Speaker 2: Then that was great.
Speaker 1: I just putnotes the book there in about thirty second
Speaker 1: futes CLI whatever is it, footnotes cliff notes.
Speaker 3: I call them footnotes cliff notes.
Speaker 2: Of the abbreviated version. But yeah, so I hope that
Speaker 2: helps this.
Speaker 4: But we do unpack a lot on all seriousness in
Speaker 4: the Doctor, the book and the podcast. I mean, if
Speaker 4: you listen from season one, and it's crazy to think
Speaker 4: we had season one. I think Deval and I both
Speaker 4: said recently that things that we said in season one
Speaker 4: and two and three we may not even feel the
Speaker 4: same way.
Speaker 3: Now.
Speaker 4: A journey, right, you guys can follow the journey of
Speaker 4: like how we came to be, at least in your
Speaker 4: eyes through the podcast.
Speaker 1: I think it would make sense if you listen to
Speaker 1: season one all the way through, and then by the
Speaker 1: time you get to about season nine when we started
Speaker 1: filming here, you'll see the differences and realizing that being
Speaker 1: in love with someone means evolving for sure.
Speaker 3: So I can't even give you an answer on how
Speaker 3: to make it.
Speaker 1: Be ready for ready, ready to evolve, and be ready
Speaker 1: for change for sure.
Speaker 4: All right on to the next one, hikeating Deval. I
Speaker 4: love you both, including your family, and I've been watching
Speaker 4: your video since Rowro was a baby. See blocking Deval
Speaker 4: to this day, Kadeen, my sister. I'm from Guyana. This
Speaker 4: question is for you, Okay, say.
Speaker 2: What's going on? By it all right?
Speaker 4: All throughout all my years of watching and listen to
Speaker 4: the podcast, I can't help but notice how much your
Speaker 4: libido from what you shared with us has changed. I
Speaker 4: remember the podcast episodes where you mentioned that sex was
Speaker 4: just wasn't just wasn't a priority for you, And now
Speaker 4: I hear Deval making jokes about how he can't keep
Speaker 4: you off him, and you make a lot more comments
Speaker 4: about sex and how enjoyable it is for you.
Speaker 2: What has changed? Do you have any advice? I'm young.
Speaker 4: My husband and I are twenty seven and we've been
Speaker 4: together since middle school. He's the greatest husband ever, so sexy,
Speaker 4: an amazing protector. It's giving me and thank you, and
Speaker 4: he still gives me butterflies when he comes home from
Speaker 4: work at the end of the day.
Speaker 2: We have one little girl and with a little boy
Speaker 2: on the way.
Speaker 4: He meets all my needs and more, and I wish
Speaker 4: he could say the same about me, especially when it
Speaker 4: comes to sex, because it seems that that's what keeps
Speaker 4: him the happiest when we're intimate and he feels desired
Speaker 4: by me. Thank you, guys for all that you do.
Speaker 4: You both are truly role models for us. First of all,
Speaker 4: says shout out to you and your husband. I love
Speaker 4: that you can speak so positively about him and the relationship,
Speaker 4: and that after time has passed, because that's usually what happens.
Speaker 4: People feel like things fall off over time. But that
Speaker 4: you guys are still so immensely into each other and
Speaker 4: you're making it a priority to prioritize him and what
Speaker 4: he wants sexually. And like you said, if you've been
Speaker 4: listening and watching the podcast and even just go reference
Speaker 4: the last question from season one to season nine to now,
Speaker 4: things have definitely drastically changed for me. But you also
Speaker 4: said here that you have a little girl with a
Speaker 4: boy on the way. I will say that children, children,
Speaker 4: It was a big thing for me, and just libido hormones,
Speaker 4: being in the mood, not being in the mood, feeling
Speaker 4: like yourself, not feeling like yourself, being fatigued and tired,
Speaker 4: still being fatigued and tired. It's like something that clicks
Speaker 4: in a woman when you become a mother that you're
Speaker 4: just always tired all the time. So these are so
Speaker 4: many things that I know you're probably battling that I
Speaker 4: have battled to. Another thing that we've realized that was
Speaker 4: a detriment to me was birth control. Birth control also
Speaker 4: to interrupted.
Speaker 3: It affects your libido, your.
Speaker 4: Hormones, everything, And you can speak to that devout too,
Speaker 4: because you've seen a great difference in everything. I mean,
Speaker 4: I'm still not matching his level of frequency and things
Speaker 4: like that, but there's definitely been a change in me
Speaker 4: since getting off of birth control.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean birth control does what it's supposed to do.
Speaker 1: Not only does it eliminature, not eliminate completely, but lessen
Speaker 1: your chance of getting pregnant, but it also makes you
Speaker 1: not want.
Speaker 3: To have sex as much, Like that's just.
Speaker 1: Part of birth control. When Kadeen finally got off birth control,
Speaker 1: her hormones regulated, and prior to that, the only reason
Speaker 1: why she was off birth control was to get pregnant.
Speaker 1: So then when she's getting pregnant, her hormones are not regulated.
Speaker 1: So it's difficult to have a high libdia libido be
Speaker 1: into having sex when you're gaining and losing weight and
Speaker 1: your hormones are all over the place. It took me
Speaker 1: and as an older gentleman, to understand what we were
Speaker 1: going through during that time, because while we were going
Speaker 1: through it, I didn't have the knowledge I had now.
Speaker 1: I was under the impression that Kadeen's libido would still
Speaker 1: say the same, and I didn't know that birth control
Speaker 1: was going to affect it, children were going to affect it,
Speaker 1: affected fatigue was going to affect it. Now that I'm older,
Speaker 1: what I do is make sure that my wife has
Speaker 1: the necessary space she needs to get the rest she
Speaker 1: needs during the day so that she can bust it
Speaker 1: wide open in the nighttime when you get it.
Speaker 3: So it's both sides, you know.
Speaker 1: I feel like women have to do a job a
Speaker 1: better job of understanding their own bodies. Men have to
Speaker 1: do a better job of understanding your wife's bodies, especially
Speaker 1: when they're going through pregnancy, postpartum, pre natal, and also
Speaker 1: understanding fatigue. So if we as a collection of humans
Speaker 1: learn to understand a woman's bodies better, sex can be
Speaker 1: way more enjoyable because then you'll understand why things are
Speaker 1: happening and you won't take it on yourself as I'm
Speaker 1: not desirable that's why she's not in a mood, because
Speaker 1: that's typically what happens. Men would feel like we internalize
Speaker 1: it just a lot like you guys internalize it when
Speaker 1: your woman is not into you, or she keeps rejecting you,
Speaker 1: or she keeps turning you down.
Speaker 3: Is it then becomes what's wrong with me?
Speaker 1: And a lot of the times when I watch from
Speaker 1: guys who say what's wrong with me, is they look
Speaker 1: for an outlet to prove to themselves that there's nothing
Speaker 1: wrong with them, so they'll they'll cheat, or they just
Speaker 1: get depressed and be like, something is wrong with me?
Speaker 3: And then you know, experience, I thought that, I was like,
Speaker 3: what the fuck is wrong with me? Like?
Speaker 1: I work out all the time, I make good money,
Speaker 1: I try to stay young. I compliment my wife, like
Speaker 1: what is wrong with me that she can't you know,
Speaker 1: she doesn't want to be with me like that? And
Speaker 1: then she got her birth control and then I gotta
Speaker 1: resected me, and then it was a rat because now
Speaker 1: I'll be feeling tugs and grabs and rubs and I'm like, yo,
Speaker 1: I'm like where did this come from?
Speaker 3: She'd be like I don't need now.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying once she approach forty that
Speaker 2: it's like, you know, take off at T minus about
Speaker 2: six weeks.
Speaker 3: Can we push your birthday up? We can push it
Speaker 3: up to about tomorrow. You know what I'm saying. If
Speaker 3: you turn forty tomorrow.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, I'm off ahead. Starts.
Speaker 3: I'm off ahead, so you can start right now.
Speaker 4: And on that note, if you'd like to be featured
Speaker 4: as a listener letter, How uncomfortable are y'all?
Speaker 5: Like?
Speaker 4: I want to know at this point, we're like a
Speaker 4: family unit. I feel like we're twelve.
Speaker 3: Seasons in y'all U comfortable?
Speaker 2: I'm talking about like y'all listening. I'm like, you guys
Speaker 2: are probably just like that's the valle be in the value.
Speaker 1: Let me, Josh, Josh say't not comfortable. You Let me
Speaker 1: tell a whole story about you sucking dick. When my
Speaker 1: mother was in the freaking audience and didn't even tell.
Speaker 2: Me, I didn't realize that she was there.
Speaker 4: Like they said your parents were going to come back,
Speaker 4: I didn't know they actually really came. Like we kind
Speaker 4: of told our parents not to come to our shows.
Speaker 1: It's a wrap now with comfort level. If I could
Speaker 1: tell a story about my wife's dick, and my mother
Speaker 1: could be there laughing. I don't care what anybody else. Still,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Okay, my mom is laughing. So y'all to
Speaker 1: deal with this.
Speaker 2: Your dad's been a lot happier lately.
Speaker 3: Maybe they don't even I don't even want to think
Speaker 3: about it. I don't even know how we got here.
Speaker 3: I don't even know how we got here.
Speaker 2: Yo, Scoop be hopping around this house to be flying
Speaker 2: on the play.
Speaker 1: If you like to be a featured as a listener letter,
Speaker 1: email us at dead Ass.
Speaker 3: I'm not doing I'm not going there with you. I'm
Speaker 3: not going in with you. My mom and my post
Speaker 3: is off limits.
Speaker 2: It's just what it is.
Speaker 3: It's not that. It's not that it is. So let's
Speaker 3: talking about your mother, thank you. And if we're gonna.
Speaker 4: Do that, so at least the house big enough.
Speaker 2: If they didn't, can we not?
Speaker 5: Can we just skip?
Speaker 1: Can we skip this all together? Like I'm done? I
Speaker 1: am so done with this whole conversation right now.
Speaker 2: You were starting to read my.
Speaker 3: Tag because you keep talking about my mother.
Speaker 1: Okay, if you if you like to be featured as
Speaker 1: one of our listening letters, email us at deadass Advice
Speaker 1: at gmail dot com.
Speaker 2: That's d E A d A S S A d
Speaker 2: V I c E at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: Stop laughing, Josh, stop laughing, Matt, stop laughing. All right,
Speaker 1: my mom is a saint.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 1: I was born through immaculate conception. Remember Jesus, how Jesus
Speaker 1: is born. I was born the same way I could
Speaker 1: walk on water.
Speaker 3: If you want to see me, it's water in here.
Speaker 3: You want to see me walk on it, walk on,
Speaker 3: have a seat.
Speaker 1: That's not religious to say Jesus call me the Viesus.
Speaker 3: You're joking.
Speaker 1: I'm joking because now people are going to take that
Speaker 1: clip of devout saying he's Jesus, just to be sure,
Speaker 1: just to be sure, lift lifted at whatever it was,
Speaker 1: it was a joke. I don't believe I'm Jesus. Okay, Moses, no,
Speaker 1: share you moment the truth. Please, this this whole thing
Speaker 1: went left far less and it happened when you talked
Speaker 1: about my mother.
Speaker 2: Nobody be trying to involve your mother. Nothing.
Speaker 4: So I hope that helps you sys to tie up
Speaker 4: that listener letter and moment of truth time.
Speaker 2: Getting back to what did we talk about to oh, Lenae,
Speaker 2: we had so.
Speaker 3: You don't even know where your mind is.
Speaker 2: She was a great guest.
Speaker 4: What do you have to say to the folks as
Speaker 4: your moment of truth as we talk about staying in
Speaker 4: breast on social and political issues and all that good stuff.
Speaker 1: This is my moment of truth. This is something that
Speaker 1: she she brought up, Leannae bored. I'm wont to say
Speaker 1: she Leannee brought up, which I think made the most sense.
Speaker 1: We presented ourselves as entertainers first, so people were coming
Speaker 1: to us for an escape, which I completely respect and
Speaker 1: understand because based on we talked about celebrity decorum, people
Speaker 1: don't necessarily want to hear from their entertainers when it
Speaker 1: comes about politics. That doesn't mean that we don't have
Speaker 1: a responsibility, but don't expect people to want to hear
Speaker 1: it if that's not how that you were presented to them.
Speaker 3: Yes, which I understand, but that also leads me to this.
Speaker 1: People like Lenae are needed, are needed, because there are
Speaker 1: plenty of uninformed and misinformed people who, if they didn't
Speaker 1: come across Lenae's page, would not understand what's going on
Speaker 1: in the very world we live in. Absolutely and it's
Speaker 1: a shame that everyone has to resort to social media
Speaker 1: to get information.
Speaker 3: But that's where we are right now. Okay.
Speaker 1: Before social media was TV okay, and that doesn't make
Speaker 1: TV any better. And before that it was books. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so right now social media is the thing. And I
Speaker 1: want to applaud Linnee for being twenty five, twenty eight,
Speaker 1: but being twenty five and being convicted with the idea
Speaker 1: that she has to spread information that she knows, but
Speaker 1: finding a very entertaining way to spread love and spread facts.
Speaker 2: You took all the moments of truth because that was
Speaker 2: definitely gonna be mine. I love that.
Speaker 3: Oh well, then you can piggyback, go over for go ahead.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, go for it. Did you want to finish
Speaker 2: your thought?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, no, I'm just saying my moment of truth
Speaker 4: is that sometimes you have to drown out the noise
Speaker 4: and find the outlets that make information digestible for you.
Speaker 4: And I love that she takes the approach of poetry.
Speaker 4: She's in her parking lot, like she said, you're scrolling
Speaker 4: through it, You're just like, why is this girl sitting
Speaker 4: an empty parking lot? It kind of brings you in.
Speaker 4: And then when you listen to her speak how eloquent
Speaker 4: she is, and how informed she is and how thorough
Speaker 4: she is with her information. You can't help but to
Speaker 4: first admire her but then actually learn something. And I
Speaker 4: love avenues like that because we have a choice with
Speaker 4: what we consume, So why not choose a choice, Choose
Speaker 4: a platform that you know you're going to get good
Speaker 4: information and the delivery is always on point. So shout
Speaker 4: out to let Lyney. Hope you guys follow her on
Speaker 4: parking Lot pimp and on Tongue Tied today. Hope you
Speaker 4: guys follow her on Parking Lot, Pimpin and all that
Speaker 4: good stuff and continue to follow us.
Speaker 2: If you have not joined.
Speaker 4: Patreon yet, get on there. The documentary is live and underway.
Speaker 4: I am so excited about how everything came together. I
Speaker 4: hope you guys have been watching and enjoying. If you
Speaker 4: haven't yet, joined Patreon to see exclusive dead Ass podcast
Speaker 4: content as well, and you can find us on social media.
Speaker 2: You can find us on dead Ass the Podcast. I'm Kadeen,
Speaker 2: I am and.
Speaker 3: I am Devout.
Speaker 1: And if you're listening on Apple podcasts, be sure to rate,
Speaker 1: review and subscribe and all. Oh, make sure you get
Speaker 1: your tickets to Love Against the world tour VIP is
Speaker 1: sold out, but we have a lot of good seats left.
Speaker 1: I think we're probably at about over fifty percent capacity
Speaker 1: at this point, and we still have cities about three
Speaker 1: more months left. So hey, get your tickets because I
Speaker 1: don't want to hear nobody hit me up around January.
Speaker 3: Talking about your team facts. Oh this is the last
Speaker 3: thing I'm gonna say.
Speaker 1: Man, don't don't be emailing at and people on the
Speaker 1: team telling them to get you in, to sneak you
Speaker 1: into the VIP.
Speaker 3: That's not how it works. It's not And if you're.
Speaker 1: Going to be their VIP, make sure you bring your books.
Speaker 1: If you don't have a copy, it's we over me.
Speaker 1: The counterintuitive approach to getting everything you want out of
Speaker 1: your relationship available everywhere.
Speaker 3: Come on physical copies and audio.
Speaker 4: It's holiday time, so listen, get your friend, get your
Speaker 4: boo tickets to the show. That's a great holiday gift.
Speaker 4: I think, Yes, couple it with the book.
Speaker 2: You got a whole little bundled deal going on.
Speaker 1: Yes, and last, but not least, remember this. My mom
Speaker 1: is a virgin and I'm here from Maculate Conception.
Speaker 3: Dead Ask God, Dead Ass is.
Speaker 1: A production of iHeartMedia podcast Network and is produced by
Speaker 1: Donor Pinya and Tribble. Follow the podcast on social media
Speaker 1: at dead Ass the Podcast and Never miss a Thing