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Speaker 1: Dead Ass podcasts. Is bouncing get crazy?

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Speaker 2: Is it really?

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Speaker 1: Yes?

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Speaker 2: I think it might get a little crazy up in

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Speaker 2: here if y'all spend a day with K.

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Speaker 1: Dead Ass.

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Speaker 2: Hey, I'm Kadeen.

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Speaker 1: And I'm Devoued and we're the Ellis's. You may know

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Speaker 1: us from posting funny videos with.

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Speaker 2: Our voys and reading each other publicly as a form

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Speaker 2: of therpy.

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Speaker 1: Wait.

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Speaker 2: I make you need therby most days.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: Oh and one more important thing to mention, we're married.

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Speaker 1: Yes, sir, we are.

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Speaker 3: We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of

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Speaker 3: Li's most taboo topics, things.

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Speaker 2: Most folks don't want to talk about.

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Speaker 3: Through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead Ass

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Speaker 3: is a term that we say every day. So when

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Speaker 3: we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts one hundred

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Speaker 3: the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

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Speaker 1: We about to take philosof to our whole new level.

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Speaker 2: Dead Ass starts right now. All right, So, alright is storytime?

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Speaker 1: Story time?

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Speaker 2: Did you have a story time for me? You do

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Speaker 2: have a story time? Honored that you have a story

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Speaker 2: time for me? To talk about a day weight, K

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Speaker 2: got a story that had a couple of go ahead

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Speaker 2: do you think.

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Speaker 3: This story is going to take us back to two

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Speaker 3: thousand and seven. I was in the NFL, and that

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Speaker 3: was way back. Kadeen and I were dating, living in Michigan,

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Speaker 3: and Kadeen pretty much gave me an ultimatum, pretty much.

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Speaker 1: Said, look, she get off the pot.

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Speaker 3: I am not trying to be your living girlfriend or

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Speaker 3: your baby mother. I want to get married, but most importantly,

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Speaker 3: I have things I want to do with my life

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Speaker 3: and I want to host TV shows. I want to

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Speaker 3: be in front of the camera. I want to be

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Speaker 3: an entertainment reporter. She she went through the list of

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Speaker 3: all of these things that she wanted to do.

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Speaker 1: And she just felt like at the time she was

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Speaker 1: just stagnant.

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Speaker 3: She had just graduated from college, got her master's degree

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Speaker 3: in speech communications and performance, and I had to make

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Speaker 3: a decision. And I was like, so, what are you

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Speaker 3: saying is She was just like, nothing, like, if we

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Speaker 3: don't make any you know, strides towards being married, I'm

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Speaker 3: just going to move back to New York and start

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Speaker 3: focusing on my career. And it was like clockwork. I

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Speaker 3: think it was like three weeks later. That's when the

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Speaker 3: the traffic reporter search was happening in Detroit, and I

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Speaker 3: was like, yo, why don't you go out for that?

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Speaker 1: And she made it to the top ten.

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Speaker 3: But it was in that moment that I realized that

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Speaker 3: got I got like a one percenter on my hands.

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Speaker 1: I got a young lady here who.

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Speaker 3: Has so many other gifts and talents, and the gifts

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Speaker 3: and talents she shares me, if you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 3: But I looked at you, like, go through all of

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Speaker 3: those different levels on that reporter search and it was over.

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Speaker 1: I think it was over seven hundred people had applied

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Speaker 1: and you made it to the top ten.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and then eventually the top five made it.

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Speaker 1: To the top five.

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Speaker 3: And it was a time and sometimes even in your

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Speaker 3: losses because you end up not getting the job, but

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Speaker 3: the fact that you made it to the top five

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Speaker 3: out of over seven hundred people shows that you're in

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Speaker 3: the top one percent for people who can really do this.

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Speaker 3: And at that moment, I say, you know what, I

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Speaker 3: have to find a way for both of us to

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Speaker 3: live out our dreams while being partners.

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Speaker 1: For each other.

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Speaker 2: That was great. I have something I was going to

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Speaker 2: say that I just realized in this moment. But we'll

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Speaker 2: save it until when we come back and we talk

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Speaker 2: more about story time. Okay, all right, karaoke time. So

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Speaker 2: in the day we k I didn't even give much

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Speaker 2: thought to karaoke it because I feel like there's so

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Speaker 2: many songs that could potentially bring true to the moment. Okay,

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Speaker 2: however I might have I don't know if we did

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Speaker 2: this song before, but it just is purposeful right now. Victoria,

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Speaker 2: we just saw her at the Usher Experience when he

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Speaker 2: had his residency down in Vegas, third to last show,

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Speaker 2: and she has this song that's pretty much called Moment,

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Speaker 2: and I forget how it starts. Oh, I got this

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Speaker 2: feeling day brom me to you, so let me take

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Speaker 2: away your pain and send it on my plane. And

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Speaker 2: that man gave me a game hold life is fun

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Speaker 2: of dream a few manifested slowly, so fucking fantasy is

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Speaker 2: your motherfucking moment? Hey, it's my motherfucking moment, y'all?

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Speaker 1: That this is a song, shoot man.

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Speaker 2: I used to I was playing that song long before

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Speaker 2: Victoria money on it, you was on it. That was

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Speaker 2: like twenty twenty. I want to say, that was like

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Speaker 2: one of my pandemic songs that I listened to all

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Speaker 2: the time, like, when are we gonna have our moment again?

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Speaker 2: And when I saw her and we met her backstage

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Speaker 2: at the Usher Residency, she was so super sweet and

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Speaker 2: I said, girl, I knew you were a star or

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Speaker 2: the minute I heard that song. And I'm so happy

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Speaker 2: for her. So shout out to Victoria Monteu and her

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Speaker 2: accolades that she's accumulated over the past couple of years.

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Speaker 2: She was a dope artist, beautiful person, beautiful spirit. So yeah, y'all,

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Speaker 2: it's my motherfucking moment. I'm gonna tell y'all, why let's

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Speaker 2: go take a break, pay some bills, and we're gonna

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Speaker 2: come back and talk more about what we can expect

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Speaker 2: from a day with k stick around. All right, So

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Speaker 2: to address your story, time you telling that story about

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Speaker 2: two thousand and seven graduating grad school because I graduated

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Speaker 2: grad school in twenty eight was it was it?

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Speaker 1: Did you do two years?

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Speaker 2: No? I did two thousand and five graduate. You were

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Speaker 2: twenty six.

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Speaker 1: Seven year right, okay?

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Speaker 2: Because I confused my years in yours sometimes because that

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Speaker 2: was like a jumble for us. While I was finishing

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Speaker 2: up grad school, Deval was in the NFL for his

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Speaker 2: first year, so we had one year we were doing

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Speaker 2: the whole distance thing. But you made me realize in

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Speaker 2: that moment that a day with K what I want

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Speaker 2: it to be is more than and what it will

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Speaker 2: be is more than just an extension of Dead Ass podcast.

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Speaker 2: But it's me getting a chance to finally put my degree,

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Speaker 2: my tools, my talents to use. It's journalists. I didn't

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Speaker 2: even think of it that way because we're so accustomed

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Speaker 2: to the Dead Ass live experience being just like really entertainment.

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Speaker 2: It's just like a fun night where people come out.

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Speaker 1: You know.

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Speaker 2: We had the DJ, we had the theatric and I

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Speaker 2: going to be that. However, a day with K not

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Speaker 2: having you on the forefront, as you know, a co host,

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Speaker 2: It'll just be me and having moments where I am

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Speaker 2: displaying the things that I had worked so hard for

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Speaker 2: that I haven't been able to exercise.

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Speaker 1: And before we get here, the podcast in itself was

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Speaker 1: all dedicated towards Kadeen becoming a daytime talk show host.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely.

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Speaker 1: I remember we sat down with.

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Speaker 3: Our manager at the time and they had asked us,

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Speaker 3: you know, are you guys interested in doing the podcast?

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Speaker 3: And I had said, at that time, the only way

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Speaker 3: I'll do a podcast. If this can parlay into Ky

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Speaker 3: getting her own show.

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Speaker 2: That's a fact. And that's the reason why some episodes

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Speaker 2: it almost seems as if I'm interviewing you. I mean,

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Speaker 2: depending on the topic. But that's why it seems that way,

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Speaker 2: or I seem of support to you, because a lot

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Speaker 2: of times it's me trying to keep those you know,

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Speaker 2: journalism skills sharp and you know it then became, of

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Speaker 2: course Deval and Kadeen throwing some personality in there, and

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Speaker 2: then in the live shows of course, including every one

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Speaker 2: of the audience, including the rest of the cast at

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Speaker 2: this point, which I feel like we have a cast

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Speaker 2: between DJ Executive Triple and everyone. So a day with

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Speaker 2: k is going to be just that, except we're going

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Speaker 2: to pull the valve from it because Deval is now

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Speaker 2: super busy doing his acting thing, which was the goal

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Speaker 2: to begin with. So I have to in this moment,

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Speaker 2: I know we're talking about to day, but I want

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Speaker 2: to give you your accolades and flowers because you've worked

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Speaker 2: so hard to establish yourself as a legitimate actor in

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Speaker 2: the acting world in space and as you pull away

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Speaker 2: from you know, the influencer title or the social media dad,

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Speaker 2: the godfather of family content as you pull away from

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Speaker 2: those titles and you really lean more into being a thespian.

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Speaker 2: This is also going to allow me the space and

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Speaker 2: grace to grow in a journalism or a more journalistic

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Speaker 2: approach to how I conduct a day with K.

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Speaker 3: And also also just to be clear, when we told

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Speaker 3: you guys this was going to be a last day

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Speaker 3: as podcast tour this past year, we were telling the truth, like,

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Speaker 3: because of my work schedule and the fact that both

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Speaker 3: of us still are really dedicated to being parents, we

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Speaker 3: had to figure out what was the best thing for

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Speaker 3: our family, what was the best thing for our careers

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Speaker 3: moving forward.

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Speaker 1: And we don't want to give.

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Speaker 3: Y'all bullshit, Like we was like, we can just come

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Speaker 3: out here and just throw anything together, you know, just

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Speaker 3: to sell tickets. But we were like, no, it's just

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Speaker 3: too important for us, yes to do that. But then

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Speaker 3: K was just like, well, what about meet us doing

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Speaker 3: a day with K where I go out on the

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Speaker 3: road and I do all these things, And she had

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Speaker 3: so many great ideas. You can tell them the ideas, maybe,

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Speaker 3: but what you gonna do for the show, because the

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Speaker 3: show is going to be slightly different, But what the

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Speaker 3: show is and what it provides for the locations we

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Speaker 3: go for those cities, it's going to be huge.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So before I start on that, you guys have

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Speaker 2: been accustomed to and it makes sense for the Dead

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Speaker 2: Ass podcast seeing Deval and Kadeen is the collective. But

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Speaker 2: what we're trying to do more so now is to

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Speaker 2: straight away from the Deval and Kadeen that you saw

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Speaker 2: on like Black Love or like doing everything with family content.

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Speaker 2: We also have individual paths that we're trying to pursue

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Speaker 2: more actively, and I think both of us turning forty,

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Speaker 2: we just kind of felt like, Okay, this was a

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Speaker 2: good time for us to just breathe new life into

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Speaker 2: what the Ellises have been, but also to what Deval

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Speaker 2: and Kadeine looked like independent. So a day with k

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Speaker 2: I'm excited about because when we go to these respective

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Speaker 2: cities where I'm going to have these live shows and tours,

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Speaker 2: I want to take opportunities in each city that I

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Speaker 2: go to to highlight some local heroes, local businesses, up

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Speaker 2: and coming people who are in those spaces who would

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Speaker 2: like who have something interesting to share, something different. So

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Speaker 2: think about if you will. Barbara Walters meets Oprah meets

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Speaker 2: Ellen meets Kadean. I was gonna say Kadeen would be

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Speaker 2: a little bit of everybody, kind of like pool together,

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Speaker 2: but in a live experience so that people can I

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Speaker 2: love what I wanted to maintain as I try to

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Speaker 2: catapult myself into a talk show esque space. I do

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Speaker 2: love the live show aspect. I love being in front

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Speaker 2: of an audience. I love feeling the energy of the crowd.

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Speaker 2: I love being able to look you all in the

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Speaker 2: eyes and say, oh my god, y'all came out here

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Speaker 2: for me. We're gonna have a good time. So there's

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Speaker 2: going to still be a great balance of girls' night partying,

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Speaker 2: getting together, karaoke, DJ and all that it's going to be.

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Speaker 2: It's going to be fun, but it's also going to

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Speaker 2: be mixed in with some deep down conversations. It's going

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Speaker 2: to be mixed with a lot. So I don't want

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Speaker 2: to give away too much because I want to give

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Speaker 2: you a little bit of what to expect, but also

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Speaker 2: to as we curate this show, to make it the

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Speaker 2: best experience that it can be for you all. I

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Speaker 2: just want to also talk to you and you can

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Speaker 2: email Triple and and be like me, what are some

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Speaker 2: things that y'all want to see on a day with K.

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Speaker 2: What are some things that you want to see more

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Speaker 2: of from me? Because that's been the request a lot lately.

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Speaker 1: Let me be an executive producer in this moment.

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Speaker 3: If you want to be a guest on a Day

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Speaker 3: with K and we're coming to your city, because we

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Speaker 3: are coming to your city. We're coming back to Chicago, Chicago,

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Speaker 3: going finally coming to Florida, Gloria.

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Speaker 2: Y'all been asking forever for us to get this. Y'all

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Speaker 2: better show up and show out and sell out because listen,

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Speaker 2: we haven't.

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Speaker 1: Been to Florida.

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Speaker 2: I have a special guest in Florida. So yeah, already,

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Speaker 2: don't don't sleep, baby, don't sleep Houston.

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Speaker 3: We're coming back to Houston to do another show there.

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Speaker 3: But if you want to be a guest on a

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Speaker 3: Day with K, if you have a unique story, an

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Speaker 3: interesting job, a story that can help save lives. Because

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Speaker 3: because Kadeen, when I tell you she's been on this

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Speaker 3: health trip since she's turned forty, she is going to

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Speaker 3: be speaking to some women who have some unique perspectives

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Speaker 3: on how they.

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Speaker 1: Save their own lives, oh for sure, and they're willing.

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Speaker 3: To share that story for you guys, so that you learn,

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Speaker 3: you know, everything doesn't always land on your doctor or

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Speaker 3: your primary care physician. So this goal is to do

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Speaker 3: some introspective lifestyle journalism. And if you want to be

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Speaker 3: a guest on a day with K writing, if we're

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Speaker 3: going to come to your city and you're going to

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Speaker 3: be at the show writing, and we can make you

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Speaker 3: a part of the show. Because remember Dad's podcast has

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Speaker 3: always been about you guys. Anyway, anyway, you know, whenever

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Speaker 3: we did the listener letters, when we brought people from

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Speaker 3: the stands on stage, it's for y'all, And it's the

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Speaker 3: same thing.

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Speaker 1: It's just going to be K curating it the way

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Speaker 1: she wants to do it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I want to talk about everything, you know. I

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Speaker 2: want to talk about business, I want to talk about motherhood.

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Speaker 2: I want to talk about womanhood. I want to talk

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Speaker 2: about the women three sixty. You know, there's so many

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Speaker 2: different components that we have to be concerned about as women.

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Speaker 2: So if I can find people who are doing things

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Speaker 2: in different respective areas that can impact us and motivate

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Speaker 2: us and inspire us as a whole as a woman,

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Speaker 2: like hey, come on down. I am excited to see

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Speaker 2: you start writing into Todad's advice at gmail dot com.

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Speaker 2: I think that was a good email address for now

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Speaker 2: until we do anything further, but I think it's going

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Speaker 2: to be really, really a good a good time.

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Speaker 3: And also also just to be clear, it isn't a

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Speaker 3: great space for women, but it's not only for women, right.

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Speaker 3: I had so many dudes who ask me, like, yo,

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Speaker 3: where could I find a place to meet a woman

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Speaker 3: that is looking to be a woman through sixty who

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Speaker 3: wants to have a career but also be a.

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Speaker 1: Mom and a wife.

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Speaker 3: These are the places, gentlemen, if you're looking for someone

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Speaker 3: who is of equal yoke to you, if you're determined

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Speaker 3: and deliberate about being a husband and a father and

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Speaker 3: a provider and all of the an entrepreneur, come to

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Speaker 3: these events and see that there are other women. There

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Speaker 3: are women we are thinking just like you. People are

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Speaker 3: trying to be delivered about the next steps in their lives.

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Speaker 3: So this is not just for women.

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Speaker 2: That's a fact.

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Speaker 3: But be comfortable women when you come, because k is

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Speaker 3: going to gear it towards you guys.

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Speaker 2: That's a fact. And it's funny you mentioned that. That's

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Speaker 2: good because I wanted to say also too, my guests

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Speaker 2: are not only going to be women, right, I want

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Speaker 2: to hear from men as well too. So if you

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Speaker 2: are you know, a man who has a business, or

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Speaker 2: if you're a woman whose husband does something, or if

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Speaker 2: you just know somebody doing something interesting, I would love

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Speaker 2: for that to be a space for y'all to come

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Speaker 2: to because historically with our dead ass podcasts, it's funny,

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Speaker 2: we used to see people come together couples and the

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Speaker 2: women would bring the guys along, or one of the couple.

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Speaker 2: One of the people in the couple, a man or woman,

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Speaker 2: would bring their partner along, and one partner sometimes didn't

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Speaker 2: know why they were there or what the show was

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Speaker 2: about or what's the live podcast. But it's nice when

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Speaker 2: you can just bring someone along for a date night

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Speaker 2: and just make it an evening where we can have

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Speaker 2: some fun together, you know, make it a weekend trip.

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Speaker 2: If you want to come down to Florida with some

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Speaker 2: girlfriends or with a couple of couples, you know, to

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Speaker 2: have a good time. That's exactly what we're looking for.

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Speaker 1: I'm just thinking about.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, so what are you most excited about?

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Speaker 1: For it?

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Speaker 3: To be honest, man, I'm just I'm excited to see

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Speaker 3: you in your journalism bag, but also in your entertainer bag,

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Speaker 3: because I feel like oftentimes you had to be the

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Speaker 3: host of that ass podcast. Well I entertained, made people laugh,

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Speaker 3: That's how it naturally was. But I'm interested in seeing

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Speaker 3: you do all of this on your own because I've

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Speaker 3: seen you do it in different facets. I've seen you

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Speaker 3: go out and you know, be guests on other people's podcasts,

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Speaker 3: but also other hosts shows that are online and stuff

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Speaker 3: like that, and I've seen you do that, and I

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Speaker 3: just want to see you continue to do it more

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Speaker 3: in a larger scale, yeah, you know, and not be partnered.

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Speaker 2: With someone or something.

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Speaker 1: You know that someone is me, I know.

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Speaker 2: I mean, if I'm going to be partnering with anybody,

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Speaker 2: you're the best person for me to be partnered with.

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Speaker 2: But I'm looking forward to being able to get back

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Speaker 2: into that journalistic bag, that lifestyle journalism, to really look

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Speaker 2: at the facts. I feel like right now, with so

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Speaker 2: many people having social media and the access to a microphone,

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Speaker 2: you know, everybody got a podcast, everybody got to show.

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Speaker 2: Everybody has something that they're producing and putting together, and

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Speaker 2: you know, I kind of want to take it back

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Speaker 2: to some fact based stories where we can really say,

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Speaker 2: this is what's actually happening. Here are the experts in

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Speaker 2: those fields, These are are the realities, you know, because

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Speaker 2: for so long we talked about perception and reality in

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Speaker 2: an episode where a lot of people's perceptions are based

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Speaker 2: off of how they've been skewed by whatever they consume

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Speaker 2: or the algorithm feeds them on social media. So I

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Speaker 2: want to take it back to a space where we're

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Speaker 2: not just getting together and we're shooting the shit and

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Speaker 2: talking about you know, random things or current events, but

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Speaker 2: things that are actually life changing people who are out

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Speaker 2: there changing lives and doing things and moving and shaking

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Speaker 2: and may just need that spotlight on them because they're

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Speaker 2: doing things that are really progressive.

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Speaker 3: Well, let me ask a question, who is this generation's

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Speaker 3: Barbara Walters Oprah Winfrey, who's doing lifestyle journalism? Because that's

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Speaker 3: what Barbara Walters and Oprah did. You know They didn't

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Speaker 3: just go interview celebrities all the time and go to

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Speaker 3: their house.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Barbara Walters.

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Speaker 3: Interviewed Michael Jackson, Oprah Winfrey interviewed Michael Jordan and Tom

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Speaker 3: Cruise like they did celebrities as well, which you're probably

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Speaker 3: going to do as well too, because you have so

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Speaker 3: many celebrity friends who would want to come down and

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Speaker 3: share their stories with you, so you can expect that

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Speaker 3: part as well. But who is the person that's also

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Speaker 3: sitting down to the doctor who found a cure for

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Speaker 3: a cancer or found a treatment that is helping people

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Speaker 3: live longer with a cancer or an HIV, or who's

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Speaker 3: helping women deal with their mental health. Like, who are

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Speaker 3: the interviewers now that we know that we say, you know,

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Speaker 3: when I watched this show or when I listen to

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Speaker 3: this person speak, they're coming with fat base statistics and

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Speaker 3: actual knowledge on what are the things affecting us as

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Speaker 3: a community and not just infusing it with their own

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Speaker 3: opinion or real journalism or.

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Speaker 2: Being skewed by their network, right, because you have some

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Speaker 2: people who are great with, you know, delivering stories and

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Speaker 2: talking about what's happening, but it's also going to be

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Speaker 2: of course packaged in a way that's suitable and approved

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Speaker 2: by whatever their media outlet is.

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Speaker 3: You know, that's that's a good point that you brought

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Speaker 3: that up, because I think the greatest thing about A

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Speaker 3: Day with K is that we plan on having sponsors

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Speaker 3: we do, but everything is funded by us.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so no one can tell you what to say,

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Speaker 1: what to say, what guests to have.

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Speaker 3: So you're not being skewed, like you said, by not

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Speaker 3: only a network, but by the big money people who

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Speaker 3: are saying, I'm giving you this money, so you can't

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Speaker 3: speak about that.

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Speaker 1: It's more genuine to.

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Speaker 3: The people who live in those communities because we're not

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Speaker 3: going to be skewed by anyone else saying no, that's

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Speaker 3: off topic.

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Speaker 2: Yep, that's a great point that you made. I mean,

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Speaker 2: I think that's that rings true to how the Ellises

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Speaker 2: have been conducting themselves in business since we started this thing,

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Speaker 2: you know what, eight years ago now. Absolutely so many

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Speaker 2: offerers have come in for TV shows in reality space

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Speaker 2: and I could have picked up and said, you know

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Speaker 2: what I can, Yeah, I can promote this and sell

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Speaker 2: that and just be a business woman and do all

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Speaker 2: these things. But at what cost, you know.

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Speaker 3: And that's no knock on the women who've done those things.

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Speaker 3: But Kadeen and I have made it very clear, and

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Speaker 3: Kadeen was very clear with this that she was like,

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Speaker 3: I don't want to ever take a job just based

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Speaker 3: on the money. And people have asked you for a

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Speaker 3: long time, So what's next for you, Kadeen?

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Speaker 1: What's next for you?

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Speaker 3: And even even when we're at the live show, so

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Speaker 3: many women saying what's next for you? Kadeen could have

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Speaker 3: been taken a job or a role or something, but

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Speaker 3: it was never in alignment with what she wanted to do.

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Speaker 2: It really was for her audience, for my audience, and

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Speaker 2: you guys are really at the root of it. I mean,

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Speaker 2: next to my family, and of course you like keeping

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Speaker 2: in mind like I have four sons, I have my

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Speaker 2: husband here. My family means everything to me, not just

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Speaker 2: my immediate my extended family. So wanting to always control

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Speaker 2: our narrative and not have somebody else control it for

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Speaker 2: us or skew it in some kind of way, it

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Speaker 2: just didn't work for me. And for some people that's

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Speaker 2: okay and that's cool, but for me that wasn't the case.

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Speaker 2: So I think a day with k is a way

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Speaker 2: of propelling myself into that space where people can see

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Speaker 2: me as a respected journalist again in a sense, lifestyle

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Speaker 2: journalists who's just you know, really looking for those really unique,

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Speaker 2: fun stories that can really impact you. Guys.

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Speaker 3: I'm excited, I really am excited. Because even the idea

440
00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:29,520
Speaker 3: of taking a daytime talk show, because that's what A

441
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:33,960
Speaker 3: Day with K is, and taking it to each city is,

442
00:20:34,119 --> 00:20:36,320
Speaker 3: I don't think anyone has ever done that before.

443
00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:38,520
Speaker 2: You can count them dead ass. The elis is to

444
00:20:38,560 --> 00:20:40,000
Speaker 2: do something people ain't done before.

445
00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:43,640
Speaker 1: Do something very different, different. Yeah, because I think it was.

446
00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:45,400
Speaker 3: A matter of Josh one of them had pointed out

447
00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:48,520
Speaker 3: to us that A Day with K is a daytime

448
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:51,040
Speaker 3: talk show because it's filmed in front of a live

449
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:54,400
Speaker 3: studio audience. It just so happens that the live studio

450
00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:58,240
Speaker 3: audience happens to be the auditorium that we've curated with

451
00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:01,639
Speaker 3: these people. So it's like we're filming a live daytime

452
00:21:01,680 --> 00:21:04,600
Speaker 3: talk show in each individual city.

453
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:06,359
Speaker 1: It's dope. It's just dope.

454
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 3: And focusing on their local artists, their local entrepreneurs just

455
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,600
Speaker 3: gives an opportunity for those some of those cities who

456
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:15,840
Speaker 3: never get to shine, to actually be upfront, you know,

457
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:17,719
Speaker 3: just be upfront and be on the forefront of all

458
00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:18,320
Speaker 3: of these different things.

459
00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:18,879
Speaker 1: I'm excited.

460
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:21,040
Speaker 2: The biggest question is because Deval was like trying to

461
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:22,359
Speaker 2: convince me of this, but I'm like, I don't know

462
00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 2: if it's going to work. So if you guys were

463
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:26,639
Speaker 2: at one of our shows this past February, one of

464
00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:29,200
Speaker 2: our Love against the World tour shows, yes, it made

465
00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:31,639
Speaker 2: sense for us to do a play on Devusher and

466
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:35,200
Speaker 2: Kansi because of course we were coming off of Usher's

467
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:38,480
Speaker 2: residency the super Bowl, then him announcing his world tour,

468
00:21:38,520 --> 00:21:40,679
Speaker 2: and then you had Beyonce on the Renaissance tour. So

469
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:42,560
Speaker 2: it made sense for us to do kind of a

470
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:45,920
Speaker 2: spoof but a dance routine around it. I feel like

471
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:47,639
Speaker 2: you need to open a routine. I feel like you

472
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:49,080
Speaker 2: need a little something. It don't kind of be a

473
00:21:49,119 --> 00:21:51,399
Speaker 2: full on dance with dances and costume changes and everything,

474
00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:54,760
Speaker 2: but you need something. So if you vote for me

475
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:57,399
Speaker 2: to have a dance, I'm gonna listen to y'all because

476
00:21:57,440 --> 00:21:59,000
Speaker 2: I was the first one to be like, I am

477
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:00,000
Speaker 2: not dancing.

478
00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:01,800
Speaker 1: A hold on, can I put this in? Just put

479
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:02,080
Speaker 1: this in.

480
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:05,400
Speaker 3: You are not dancing in the leotar because that leotard

481
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:09,600
Speaker 3: got swallowed. And one thing we stretched, one thing we

482
00:22:09,720 --> 00:22:13,359
Speaker 3: learned about, like performances and stuff. There's a reason why

483
00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:17,240
Speaker 3: dancers do full choreography in their cost.

484
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:19,160
Speaker 1: Beforehand.

485
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:21,760
Speaker 3: Yes, because had we known that your ass was going

486
00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,920
Speaker 3: to swallow up that leotar. We probably would have made

487
00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:28,040
Speaker 3: some adjustments, but we didn't. You didn't dance until in

488
00:22:28,040 --> 00:22:30,640
Speaker 3: that full uniform, until you got there the day off. Yes,

489
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:33,560
Speaker 3: but I'm just putting this out there as your executive

490
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:36,760
Speaker 3: producer slash husband, that you will not be doing no

491
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:38,080
Speaker 3: performances in the leotar.

492
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 1: That's no more.

493
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:43,280
Speaker 2: We retired that TD Cakes.

494
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:46,000
Speaker 1: TD Cakes is not going to be performing anymore.

495
00:22:47,960 --> 00:22:50,400
Speaker 2: Gave you that it was great, that it was great.

496
00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:52,199
Speaker 2: I'm gonna leave it up to y'all. If y'all want

497
00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:54,040
Speaker 2: to see me do a little you know, eight count

498
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:59,240
Speaker 2: situation whatever like that, I do it. But it's going

499
00:22:59,280 --> 00:22:59,919
Speaker 2: to retire that.

500
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:02,960
Speaker 3: I'm just sitting here telling you I'm excited because even

501
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,560
Speaker 3: when I think about daytime TV, but also.

502
00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:08,359
Speaker 1: Is it called late night television?

503
00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:12,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like you you move more towards late

504
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:14,880
Speaker 3: night television because even some of the jokes you say

505
00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:17,080
Speaker 3: that even some of the things you do as a

506
00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:19,240
Speaker 3: as a woman and a mom and a wife, it's

507
00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:21,639
Speaker 3: not always daytime friendly.

508
00:23:22,119 --> 00:23:25,359
Speaker 1: No, like you're gonna you still gonna be k Yes, that's.

509
00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:27,040
Speaker 2: A good point to me because I know, yeah, because

510
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:29,320
Speaker 2: when you hear like journalistic approach, and you hear like

511
00:23:29,359 --> 00:23:31,320
Speaker 2: lifestyle journalism. I don't want y'all feel like it's gonna

512
00:23:31,320 --> 00:23:34,560
Speaker 2: be something stuffy, right and we're gonna sit and watch

513
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:37,199
Speaker 2: these long packages like that's not what That's not what

514
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:39,560
Speaker 2: it's gonna be. I'm still gonna be kk I'm still

515
00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 2: gonna be true to who I am, gonna be true

516
00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:44,159
Speaker 2: to dead ass. I'm still gonna be dropping it, and y'all,

517
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:47,320
Speaker 2: y'all have to come prepared to be able to reciprocate

518
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:49,800
Speaker 2: that it's gonna be. You want the same energy, you

519
00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:52,679
Speaker 2: want the same energy. I want y'all coming there, turning up,

520
00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:54,199
Speaker 2: and it's gonna be a good It has to be

521
00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:55,720
Speaker 2: a good time. But I want it to be a

522
00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:58,320
Speaker 2: thing where you're gonna have so many emotions that you

523
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:01,359
Speaker 2: feel that evening. I want a couple of tears, because

524
00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:03,200
Speaker 2: you have a couple of tears, because you can relate

525
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,600
Speaker 2: a couple. I want you to scream, I want you

526
00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:07,159
Speaker 2: to dance. I want all the things.

527
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 3: It's going to be a mix of Sherry. She's hilarious,

528
00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:18,000
Speaker 3: but because she has that comedic aspect and she's funny

529
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:19,920
Speaker 3: and she gets out there and does stuff, but also

530
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:23,200
Speaker 3: a mix between her and Tam because when you look

531
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:25,600
Speaker 3: at what Tam has done in the journalist space, in

532
00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:27,760
Speaker 3: the journalism space, like she's a legend.

533
00:24:28,119 --> 00:24:29,760
Speaker 1: So it will be like a mix of the two.

534
00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:32,000
Speaker 3: So be ready to come have fun and joke around

535
00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 3: and laugh, but also listen to some stories that makes

536
00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:36,439
Speaker 3: you be like wow, like I didn't know that that

537
00:24:36,560 --> 00:24:40,280
Speaker 3: was that important. But and also it won't be daytime

538
00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:42,960
Speaker 3: because it's not gonna be PG like That's why I'm saying,

539
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:46,120
Speaker 3: it's more like late nights, you know what I'm saying,

540
00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:47,840
Speaker 3: more like late night now. And have there been many

541
00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:50,840
Speaker 3: women who've done late night television? Most of the time

542
00:24:51,080 --> 00:24:51,480
Speaker 3: is men.

543
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:56,399
Speaker 2: No, Like you have Jimmy Kimmel, you have, we don't watch.

544
00:24:57,280 --> 00:24:59,960
Speaker 2: But there was woman at the time.

545
00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:02,560
Speaker 3: There was a young woman who had a late night

546
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,120
Speaker 3: show for a little bit during the pandemic. I can't

547
00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:07,840
Speaker 3: remember her name. She was an influencer at first, and

548
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,800
Speaker 3: they put her on late night. I remember it was

549
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:13,280
Speaker 3: Lily Sing. Lily Sing had a late night show. But

550
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:15,400
Speaker 3: even on her late night show, she did skits.

551
00:25:16,359 --> 00:25:16,520
Speaker 1: You know.

552
00:25:16,600 --> 00:25:17,840
Speaker 3: She had a part where she had did like a

553
00:25:17,840 --> 00:25:20,159
Speaker 3: little dance routine that was part of a skit. And

554
00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:22,159
Speaker 3: when I think about what Lily Sing was doing in

555
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:26,160
Speaker 3: the late night space, I'm kind of like that reminds

556
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:28,440
Speaker 3: me of k I just feel like you're more journal

557
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:32,040
Speaker 3: You do way more journalism than Lily Sing because she

558
00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:33,919
Speaker 3: was a comedian. She was a host, so she was

559
00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 3: being a host and a comedian. And although you can

560
00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:40,720
Speaker 3: be funny, you're rooted in the truth and you're rooted

561
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,480
Speaker 3: in what the message is going.

562
00:25:42,280 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 2: To be about the story is but.

563
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:45,280
Speaker 1: Doing it in a funny way.

564
00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:48,600
Speaker 3: So if we had to go again, we would have

565
00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:52,960
Speaker 3: to say it would be Barbara Walters slash Oprah, slash

566
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:57,959
Speaker 3: Tam slash Chrry Seppard slash Lily Sing.

567
00:25:58,560 --> 00:25:59,800
Speaker 1: It's all of that wrapped up.

568
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:06,600
Speaker 3: Slash beyond little little sprinklings slash Beyonce. And you you

569
00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:09,639
Speaker 3: are a little ratchets. So you got little Cardi, a

570
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:12,960
Speaker 3: little Cardi or is it more Nicki Minaje Cardi b

571
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:17,520
Speaker 3: Or is it little Kim Little? Because matter of fact,

572
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,280
Speaker 3: that was little, that was its more little Kim.

573
00:26:20,359 --> 00:26:21,040
Speaker 2: It was my era.

574
00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's more little. It's a mix of all of

575
00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:25,959
Speaker 1: those things.

576
00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:28,040
Speaker 3: And because you Caribbean, you could throw a little Rihanna

577
00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:29,600
Speaker 3: in there because you're gonna be a billionaire and I

578
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:30,240
Speaker 3: need that break.

579
00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:33,560
Speaker 1: I'll be a little a sap on the side. I'm

580
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:34,400
Speaker 1: gonna be chilling on.

581
00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:37,360
Speaker 2: The side, like that's my baby, You're gonna come.

582
00:26:38,359 --> 00:26:41,159
Speaker 3: If I'm not filming, I will definitely be in the building.

583
00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:43,440
Speaker 3: I'm definitely gonna be back there with my headsets and

584
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:44,000
Speaker 3: our lights.

585
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:47,040
Speaker 1: Can we get the lights down? K need lights.

586
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:49,479
Speaker 2: I'm excited. I'm excited to curate the team. I mean,

587
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:51,560
Speaker 2: I also even just think, shout out to my team. Man.

588
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,080
Speaker 2: I'm thinking about how much fun we had on tour

589
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 2: for Love against the World with our crew. You know,

590
00:26:58,200 --> 00:26:59,800
Speaker 2: we had a couple of changes to the crew, but

591
00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:02,600
Speaker 2: it's like all great changes. I'm excited to see how

592
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:05,920
Speaker 2: we're going to curate this experience for y'all. You know,

593
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:08,359
Speaker 2: just just just tell me more, tell me more, because

594
00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:11,400
Speaker 2: I've seen a lot of you. And Triple has also

595
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:13,560
Speaker 2: mentioned it too, that people write in like, you know,

596
00:27:13,720 --> 00:27:15,840
Speaker 2: what's K doing with this? And can we see K

597
00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:18,560
Speaker 2: do that? Now? Is your opportunity, y'all. I'm asking you,

598
00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:21,520
Speaker 2: I'm asking you what you want to see more of

599
00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:24,760
Speaker 2: because I'm dedicating this portion of my life for the

600
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:31,840
Speaker 2: foreseeable sable future into really seeing what this is going

601
00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:33,960
Speaker 2: to look like for me as I propel myself into

602
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:36,359
Speaker 2: those spaces that I've always wanted to be in. And

603
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,840
Speaker 2: it really just also takes me back to thinking about

604
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:45,359
Speaker 2: being a high school student, high school graduate and really

605
00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 2: being on the fence about what I wanted to do

606
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:50,600
Speaker 2: with my life and how I was going to tell

607
00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:52,919
Speaker 2: my family that I did not want to carry the

608
00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:59,080
Speaker 2: medical field of torch and having the courage to say

609
00:27:59,119 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 2: I'm not doing it inventional way, you know, doing one

610
00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:05,480
Speaker 2: year local at Acunity College and then getting into a

611
00:28:05,480 --> 00:28:08,280
Speaker 2: program where I'm doing communication, and for me, this is

612
00:28:08,320 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 2: like very personal too. It's very personal because it's me

613
00:28:11,080 --> 00:28:13,600
Speaker 2: proving to myself as well that I can do this.

614
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:16,320
Speaker 2: I even admitted to the crew last night that I

615
00:28:16,359 --> 00:28:18,720
Speaker 2: am actually terrified to do this in a.

616
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:19,760
Speaker 1: Sense, I'm happy terrified.

617
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:22,199
Speaker 3: Do you want to know why you've been terrified to do

618
00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:25,360
Speaker 3: a lot of things over this past year and delivered.

619
00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:28,200
Speaker 3: I'm going to start because turning forty, you said, when

620
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,080
Speaker 3: we got the opportunity to walk in Fashion Week for

621
00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:30,680
Speaker 3: the first.

622
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:31,919
Speaker 2: Time, oh my god, terrified.

623
00:28:31,760 --> 00:28:33,600
Speaker 3: This and this is the truth, guys, and this is

624
00:28:33,600 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 3: why I'm so excited. There were times in our relationship

625
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:40,800
Speaker 3: where I felt bad because you over ten year spin

626
00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:43,600
Speaker 3: you got pregnant four times, and I felt like, damn,

627
00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:47,720
Speaker 3: I got pregnant five times. He got pregnant five times,

628
00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:53,280
Speaker 3: and I felt like I got a chance to chase

629
00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 3: all of my dreams without any hesitation or any pause.

630
00:28:57,680 --> 00:28:59,320
Speaker 3: And there were times where I would just look at

631
00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:02,360
Speaker 3: you and just be like, she's dedicating this part of

632
00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:05,960
Speaker 3: her life to our family. I can't wait until all

633
00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:08,280
Speaker 3: of this is done and she can get ready to

634
00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:12,120
Speaker 3: dedicate her life to herself. And watching you over the

635
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:16,480
Speaker 3: past year, right starting with last summer, I know you

636
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:20,400
Speaker 3: guys have noticed how because these bodies changed, you changed

637
00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:22,880
Speaker 3: your diet, You started going to the doctor more often,

638
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:26,400
Speaker 3: You're eating completely different. You're working out every single day,

639
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:28,600
Speaker 3: even days like today when we do two podcasts, She's

640
00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 3: leaving here and going to work out, and it's like

641
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:33,360
Speaker 3: it's it's and when I mean workout, I mean just

642
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:36,560
Speaker 3: going to a gym and just doing squats. She's going

643
00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:40,560
Speaker 3: to a sports performance gym where she is training like

644
00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:42,760
Speaker 3: I trained when I was getting ready.

645
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:44,600
Speaker 2: For full all that's a push for myself, like.

646
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 3: Doing high performance dynamic training, and I'm watching your body change,

647
00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:53,520
Speaker 3: and I'm watching you age backwards. And you are going

648
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:56,240
Speaker 3: to be the representative of a woman who says, my

649
00:29:56,320 --> 00:29:59,400
Speaker 3: dreams were deferred but never denied. I got everything I

650
00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:01,280
Speaker 3: want out of life. Maybe I didn't get it at

651
00:30:01,320 --> 00:30:05,080
Speaker 3: the same time, but I got it last year going

652
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:09,320
Speaker 3: into September, you were terrified to walk across that stage

653
00:30:09,320 --> 00:30:12,520
Speaker 3: in fashion, and I watched you bust your ass to

654
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:13,280
Speaker 3: get in shape.

655
00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:15,520
Speaker 2: Bro Let me just paint the picture real quick for y'all.

656
00:30:15,520 --> 00:30:18,320
Speaker 2: When we got to the Actively Black Fashion Show. You know,

657
00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:20,960
Speaker 2: as a woman, naturally you get there and you're looking

658
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:25,000
Speaker 2: at the other women around you. Okay, some of whom

659
00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:26,240
Speaker 2: I'm like, do you have any kids? Do you have

660
00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:28,520
Speaker 2: any kids? Because it's just so natural thing that happens

661
00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:31,480
Speaker 2: when you have children that you are hyper sensitive about

662
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:33,440
Speaker 2: how your body has changed and it's not the same.

663
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 2: And I got there into that room and I was like, man,

664
00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:38,760
Speaker 2: I know I worked, but did I work enough?

665
00:30:39,520 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 1: You know?

666
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:43,239
Speaker 2: Yeah? I got these stretch bards. There's twenty something year

667
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:46,280
Speaker 2: olds in here. You know, bodies are on point. Never

668
00:30:46,320 --> 00:30:49,920
Speaker 2: had a kid in they day, And I really at

669
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:52,800
Speaker 2: that moment was terrified and then had the incident where

670
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:55,600
Speaker 2: my legs were bruised. Yeah, you know the morning of

671
00:30:55,800 --> 00:30:56,360
Speaker 2: and you.

672
00:30:56,320 --> 00:30:58,600
Speaker 3: Know what happened when your back was against the wall

673
00:30:58,680 --> 00:31:00,760
Speaker 3: and all odds were against you, you know what you did.

674
00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:01,360
Speaker 2: Push it through?

675
00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:02,400
Speaker 1: You showed up I did.

676
00:31:02,640 --> 00:31:07,000
Speaker 3: That's why I'm excited about you being nervous, because when

677
00:31:07,040 --> 00:31:09,560
Speaker 3: you get nervous, you over prepare, which means if you're

678
00:31:09,640 --> 00:31:11,760
Speaker 3: over preparing for this because you're nervous, they're going to

679
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:15,200
Speaker 3: get a show that they never never expected from you.

680
00:31:15,360 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 3: That's why I'm excited, and I want to see people

681
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:21,200
Speaker 3: just be excited for you. Not excited for you as

682
00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:25,200
Speaker 3: oh that's Devoo's wife. No, just excited for that's Kadem,

683
00:31:25,760 --> 00:31:28,120
Speaker 3: that's KK. You know what I'm saying like that, I'm

684
00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:29,080
Speaker 3: just excited about that.

685
00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:31,600
Speaker 2: I just I love that. Thank you, babe, Thank you,

686
00:31:31,680 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 2: Thank you for always seeing me.

687
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:38,720
Speaker 1: And knowing you You saw me, you supported me.

688
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:41,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it really I'll be transparent with you guys

689
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 2: in this moment and say, like a lot of the

690
00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 2: past decade, having children and coming back and stuff, it

691
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:49,320
Speaker 2: allowed for a little bit of I think self sabotage

692
00:31:49,360 --> 00:31:51,880
Speaker 2: and self doubt to creep in because it made me

693
00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:55,640
Speaker 2: feel like, all right, well, I'm pretty comfortable, like if

694
00:31:55,640 --> 00:32:00,520
Speaker 2: I don't do another thing from a career perspective, pestionally,

695
00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:03,040
Speaker 2: You've also made it clear that I would be okay,

696
00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 2: the family would be.

697
00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:05,400
Speaker 1: You don't have to do it right, I don't have

698
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:06,040
Speaker 1: to have any of this.

699
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 2: So I could easily be like, you know what, let

700
00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 2: me let this doubt and fair and you know, these

701
00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:14,360
Speaker 2: these these insecurities that I may have, I can just

702
00:32:15,080 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 2: sit in them, and I can just not do a

703
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:19,880
Speaker 2: live show, and we can just not do live shows anymore,

704
00:32:19,960 --> 00:32:22,080
Speaker 2: and Devalu can go on to be an actor and

705
00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:23,840
Speaker 2: I can be a wife and mom and continue to

706
00:32:23,880 --> 00:32:26,520
Speaker 2: do my little brand partnerships and be a business woman.

707
00:32:26,560 --> 00:32:28,760
Speaker 2: And I would have to be in this space. But

708
00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:32,200
Speaker 2: what I'm doing is I'm forcing myself to step into

709
00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:36,280
Speaker 2: a bit of a discomfort zone. If you will, I

710
00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:39,400
Speaker 2: look at my boys. I can't preach to them about

711
00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:42,719
Speaker 2: conquering their fears and doing things outside of their you know,

712
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:45,520
Speaker 2: comfort zone if I'm not doing it, and I want

713
00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:47,760
Speaker 2: to be deliberate and have the conversations with my boys

714
00:32:47,760 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 2: and let them know your mom is about to do

715
00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:52,120
Speaker 2: a show by herself, Like, do you know how nervous

716
00:32:52,160 --> 00:32:54,120
Speaker 2: I am, but how excited I am for it too?

717
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:56,800
Speaker 2: And I want them to see the process through for

718
00:32:56,960 --> 00:32:59,320
Speaker 2: me in the next couple months as I prepare for this.

719
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:04,520
Speaker 2: That's important to me. You are about thank you, thank you.

720
00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:06,200
Speaker 1: I hope you know that, but I want that going

721
00:33:06,240 --> 00:33:08,720
Speaker 1: to be un fucking real.

722
00:33:09,080 --> 00:33:13,200
Speaker 2: And I just wanted to be a motivation to anybody listening,

723
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 2: man or woman or in between, like I want you

724
00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:20,960
Speaker 2: to know that if you really feel inside that you

725
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:22,960
Speaker 2: can do it, don't let fear stop you, don't let

726
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:25,960
Speaker 2: doubt stop you. You know, I know that anybody in

727
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:27,840
Speaker 2: attendance in that building is going to be someone who

728
00:33:27,920 --> 00:33:31,160
Speaker 2: came there specifically for me, who pay their money for

729
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:33,239
Speaker 2: their ticket to see me. And I never take that

730
00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:36,720
Speaker 2: for granted that you guys support us in so many ways,

731
00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:39,680
Speaker 2: whether it's time, whether it's sharing, whether it's financially, whether

732
00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:42,040
Speaker 2: it's you know, buying a book or buying a ticket,

733
00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:43,880
Speaker 2: Like I really don't take any of that for granted.

734
00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:46,760
Speaker 2: So I'm excited. I mean, I'm nervous, but in an

735
00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:47,880
Speaker 2: excited kind of way.

736
00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:52,440
Speaker 1: So you know, as a fan, like I'm over here smiling.

737
00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:54,000
Speaker 1: I don't over here. I can hear it, but I

738
00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:56,440
Speaker 1: can't wait to like, like sit.

739
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:57,560
Speaker 2: Back fan over here, y'all.

740
00:33:57,640 --> 00:33:59,960
Speaker 1: No, I can't wait to sit back and just watch.

741
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:03,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, because I've become a fan of yours

742
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:05,960
Speaker 3: as well. Whenever you do something without me, it's like

743
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:07,960
Speaker 3: I said, what happened, let me see you know, like

744
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:10,279
Speaker 3: when you wanted to go speak at Men's Choice, Like

745
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:11,359
Speaker 3: I want to see the video.

746
00:34:11,440 --> 00:34:12,759
Speaker 1: I want to you know what I'm saying. We sat

747
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:16,440
Speaker 1: here and worked on your speech, and you.

748
00:34:17,920 --> 00:34:20,720
Speaker 3: Have your own way of doing things, and I've learned

749
00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:23,240
Speaker 3: to just be like, dang, like she really put that together.

750
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:26,920
Speaker 3: Like I'm controlling. I'm a control freak and I just

751
00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:28,680
Speaker 3: I want everybody around me to do well. So I'm like,

752
00:34:28,680 --> 00:34:29,920
Speaker 3: why don't you try this? Wyann't you do this? And

753
00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 3: you took a little piece in you like okay, okay,

754
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:35,279
Speaker 3: not using that, Yeah, you're using this. And then to hear, no,

755
00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:40,360
Speaker 3: to see these twenty two year old men who don't

756
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:43,960
Speaker 3: have kids, didn't have girlfriends run up on us when

757
00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:46,520
Speaker 3: we went to this next event and give you a

758
00:34:46,520 --> 00:34:49,000
Speaker 3: big hug and talk about something. Your speech was so

759
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:52,319
Speaker 3: dynamic and I'm just like, at twenty two, I wasn't

760
00:34:52,360 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 3: listening to no women's speech thinking that it was dynamic.

761
00:34:55,120 --> 00:34:57,480
Speaker 3: But these men, these young men ran up on you.

762
00:34:57,640 --> 00:34:59,239
Speaker 3: Was like, oh my gosh, mister Ellis.

763
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:02,320
Speaker 2: But you're right. Yeah, I spoken a More for Choice event,

764
00:35:02,719 --> 00:35:04,960
Speaker 2: just shared my birthing story and how Devo was of

765
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,400
Speaker 2: support to me when I was pregnant and through my

766
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:10,160
Speaker 2: deliveries and all of that, and yeah, you're right. A

767
00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:11,680
Speaker 2: couple of the young men after were just like, oh,

768
00:35:11,760 --> 00:35:14,120
Speaker 2: miss Ellis, like you were so so dynamic.

769
00:35:14,239 --> 00:35:15,640
Speaker 1: It said you were dynamic. They came up to me,

770
00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:18,759
Speaker 1: was like, your wife is funny, and I'm just like, dang.

771
00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 3: I wish I would have been there to see it,

772
00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:23,759
Speaker 3: because because one thing young men don't do now you're

773
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:26,680
Speaker 3: you're beautiful, you know, I get that. They didn't come

774
00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:28,120
Speaker 3: up to me and be like, oh my god, your

775
00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:29,880
Speaker 3: wife fine, because these.

776
00:35:29,440 --> 00:35:30,440
Speaker 1: Are young you know what I'm saying.

777
00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:32,279
Speaker 3: They came up to me and it was just like, man,

778
00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 3: your wife told her birthday story. Man, it was so

779
00:35:34,719 --> 00:35:37,960
Speaker 3: dynamic and she's funny. Not once did they mention what

780
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:41,439
Speaker 3: you look like, which I understand at twenty two year old,

781
00:35:41,480 --> 00:35:43,320
Speaker 3: that's the first thing you look at and a woman.

782
00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:46,680
Speaker 3: But think about how many how many men right there,

783
00:35:46,719 --> 00:35:50,799
Speaker 3: you've probably changed their perspective on what women.

784
00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:52,200
Speaker 1: Are and can be in any space.

785
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:55,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, because you got up there and you you were

786
00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:58,319
Speaker 3: very deliberated about how you were going to dress as well,

787
00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:00,279
Speaker 3: which is me, which is why I love why you

788
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:03,920
Speaker 3: do everything you do because you're aware of everything. You're

789
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:06,319
Speaker 3: aware of who your husband is, You're aware of who

790
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:08,600
Speaker 3: you are, You're aware of who's going to be in

791
00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:10,400
Speaker 3: the crowd. You even said to me, I'm not going

792
00:36:10,440 --> 00:36:11,920
Speaker 3: to go with a skirt because if I'm standing on

793
00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:13,840
Speaker 3: the if I'm standing on the stage and there's a podium,

794
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:14,839
Speaker 3: they're going to be looking up.

795
00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:17,200
Speaker 1: These are things that as a man, I've never even

796
00:36:17,239 --> 00:36:18,000
Speaker 1: ever thought.

797
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:20,480
Speaker 3: About, but these are things that you are like I'm

798
00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:22,399
Speaker 3: going to and I guess that goes back to your

799
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:26,160
Speaker 3: pageant days because you've done this before. But I cannot

800
00:36:26,360 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 3: wait until people get a chance to see you, like

801
00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:34,040
Speaker 3: in all of you and just know there's going to

802
00:36:34,080 --> 00:36:36,399
Speaker 3: be so many more opportunities after this, Like.

803
00:36:36,400 --> 00:36:38,880
Speaker 1: It's going to be it's already been delivered.

804
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:42,160
Speaker 2: God, He's literally like now it's the time, and like

805
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:44,880
Speaker 2: you said something. Being deferred and not denied is so major,

806
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:47,160
Speaker 2: I think for so many components of our life, because

807
00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:48,920
Speaker 2: there have been moments where were just like, damn, why

808
00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 2: didn't that work out?

809
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:49,719
Speaker 4: Why?

810
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:51,879
Speaker 2: And you don't question it after a while, like when

811
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:53,799
Speaker 2: you get to this maybe it's an age thing, or

812
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:56,719
Speaker 2: you just get to enough life experience you just realize that, like, man,

813
00:36:57,200 --> 00:36:59,880
Speaker 2: I'm not going to question anymore why something didn't happen

814
00:37:00,120 --> 00:37:03,080
Speaker 2: moment because I was not ready to receive that blessing.

815
00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:05,719
Speaker 2: But I feel like God is walking me into a

816
00:37:05,760 --> 00:37:09,280
Speaker 2: space where I am ready or he's saying ready or not, sis,

817
00:37:10,520 --> 00:37:12,560
Speaker 2: He's kind of like it ain't really to ready or not.

818
00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:15,640
Speaker 2: And I also think about the span of which you

819
00:37:15,719 --> 00:37:18,680
Speaker 2: guys have gotten to know me. It's been about what

820
00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:21,200
Speaker 2: eight years. Cairo was about to be eight, so it's

821
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:23,879
Speaker 2: been about eight years. And for the most part, most

822
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:30,040
Speaker 2: people have seen Kadeine the wife, the mom, and been pregnant, yeah, wife,

823
00:37:30,080 --> 00:37:32,800
Speaker 2: the mom, you know, and coming back in between pregnancies

824
00:37:32,840 --> 00:37:34,719
Speaker 2: and stuff. But it's a whole side of me that

825
00:37:35,400 --> 00:37:39,239
Speaker 2: people don't even know, that people have not experienced, and

826
00:37:39,719 --> 00:37:41,759
Speaker 2: that is a portion that I'm excited to let you

827
00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:44,440
Speaker 2: guys into a little bit because I feel like that

828
00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:47,400
Speaker 2: portion of my life was curated for social media and

829
00:37:47,440 --> 00:37:49,640
Speaker 2: for a purpose because it worked at that time. But

830
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:51,800
Speaker 2: it was really at the root of it, Deval trying

831
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:54,880
Speaker 2: to expand his career as an actor, and then me

832
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:59,160
Speaker 2: trying to expand my career as a host, journalist, all

833
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:01,360
Speaker 2: of that good stuff. So this is going to be

834
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:03,040
Speaker 2: the perfect place in space to do that.

835
00:38:03,040 --> 00:38:07,200
Speaker 3: And be very deliberate. You're not just the host. You

836
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:10,000
Speaker 3: are a journalist. You went to school for this. You

837
00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:13,040
Speaker 3: had to take exams and pass tests and go through

838
00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:16,839
Speaker 3: rigors to get your master's degree, graduated cum laude, right

839
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:19,840
Speaker 3: to do what you do. And I think that's important

840
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:23,880
Speaker 3: to when people even think about dead ass podcasts and

841
00:38:24,080 --> 00:38:26,600
Speaker 3: like people say, it's just something different about that as podcasts.

842
00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:29,680
Speaker 3: Feel like I learned so much in part because we

843
00:38:30,239 --> 00:38:33,600
Speaker 3: have a producer in Trouble who always make sure that

844
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:36,239
Speaker 3: when we speak on something, we speak on something in

845
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:39,680
Speaker 3: a factual manner. It's not always based on opinions. We

846
00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:42,680
Speaker 3: give our opinions about what we think. But that portion

847
00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:45,479
Speaker 3: about facts and stacks was deliberate because this is also

848
00:38:45,520 --> 00:38:48,200
Speaker 3: a part of journalism. It's not just about what we

849
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:51,480
Speaker 3: think about everything, and I think that's what's missing in

850
00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:55,440
Speaker 3: today's society. You know, everyone has a platform, yes, but

851
00:38:55,520 --> 00:38:57,600
Speaker 3: have you done any research to see if your words

852
00:38:57,680 --> 00:39:00,000
Speaker 3: or what you're sharing or spewing to the general public

853
00:39:00,160 --> 00:39:01,440
Speaker 3: is going to be helpful or hurtful?

854
00:39:01,520 --> 00:39:01,640
Speaker 1: Right?

855
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:03,960
Speaker 2: Or what you're consuming there's already fact. But you know

856
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:05,839
Speaker 2: how many times I've heard people come to me and say,

857
00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:07,799
Speaker 2: you saw that this, this is that happen, and I

858
00:39:07,880 --> 00:39:09,400
Speaker 2: was like, did it really happen? And then you come

859
00:39:09,440 --> 00:39:11,279
Speaker 2: to find a literally didn't happen. It was just something

860
00:39:11,320 --> 00:39:15,160
Speaker 2: that was completely false, just saying it, just to say it.

861
00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:18,200
Speaker 2: So yeah, that being said, I'm excited to spend some

862
00:39:18,239 --> 00:39:20,520
Speaker 2: time with y'all. Be on the lookout for lots of

863
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:24,279
Speaker 2: announcements coming up in the near future about what A

864
00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:26,200
Speaker 2: Day with K is going to look like. Dead Ass

865
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:30,080
Speaker 2: Podcast presents a Day with K, and I'm looking forward

866
00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:33,760
Speaker 2: to curating a really, really awesome evening with you guys

867
00:39:33,760 --> 00:39:36,719
Speaker 2: in your respective cities. So get excited. We're going to

868
00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:39,680
Speaker 2: roll out the cities soon and you know, get those

869
00:39:39,719 --> 00:39:40,680
Speaker 2: tickets on and popping.

870
00:39:40,840 --> 00:39:43,360
Speaker 1: I got my moment of truth. So after we do

871
00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:44,040
Speaker 1: this moment.

872
00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:46,640
Speaker 2: All right, cool, wonderful, wonderful. All right, let's take a

873
00:39:46,680 --> 00:39:48,120
Speaker 2: quick break. We're going to pay some bills and we're

874
00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:49,839
Speaker 2: going to get back into some list of letters, because

875
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:51,840
Speaker 2: of course we have never had an episode with that one,

876
00:39:51,920 --> 00:40:03,960
Speaker 2: so stick around. All right, we're back. Let's dive into

877
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:07,200
Speaker 2: some listener letters. Do you want to go first, babe,

878
00:40:07,239 --> 00:40:09,000
Speaker 2: I'll go first, baby, Okay? Cool?

879
00:40:09,360 --> 00:40:10,440
Speaker 1: What's up? Kadeen and Duvou?

880
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:13,480
Speaker 3: First off, absolutely love you guys. I'm low key scared

881
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:18,000
Speaker 3: to meet child because I may ugly. You are like

882
00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:19,600
Speaker 3: my big brother and sister in my head, and I

883
00:40:19,640 --> 00:40:22,200
Speaker 3: appreciate the guidance you provide me. I've been in therapy

884
00:40:22,239 --> 00:40:24,760
Speaker 3: for four years now and have the same therapists. Absolutely

885
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:26,840
Speaker 3: love her and she has played a huge part in

886
00:40:26,880 --> 00:40:29,439
Speaker 3: my mental health journey. Ninety nine percent of the time.

887
00:40:29,560 --> 00:40:32,120
Speaker 3: I'm receptive and take accountability to do the work, But

888
00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:34,520
Speaker 3: there is this one specific thing I can't seem to

889
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:38,440
Speaker 3: adjust my therapist has wanted me to work on. I'm

890
00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:40,920
Speaker 3: a single, childless, thirty six year old who does is

891
00:40:41,080 --> 00:40:46,280
Speaker 3: this Yeah, does desire marriage and family. I'm also okay

892
00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:48,600
Speaker 3: if it doesn't happen, and my therapist thinks I should

893
00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:51,440
Speaker 3: consider a man who could be walking on in his

894
00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:54,160
Speaker 3: purpose and enjoys what he does. Example, she uses a

895
00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:56,759
Speaker 3: teacher but doesn't make a lot of money, but is

896
00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:59,120
Speaker 3: able to take care of himself. For me, would he

897
00:40:59,160 --> 00:41:02,040
Speaker 3: be able to take on more than himself with that

898
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:05,319
Speaker 3: same income in a growing economy? For me, it's not

899
00:41:05,360 --> 00:41:07,919
Speaker 3: about an actual dollar amount, but about mindset. I value

900
00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:10,399
Speaker 3: stability in partnership, so I'm not looking to put sole

901
00:41:10,480 --> 00:41:12,799
Speaker 3: responsibility on the man, but I do hope to have

902
00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:16,000
Speaker 3: a partner with a growth mindset. I was raised very

903
00:41:16,000 --> 00:41:19,000
Speaker 3: similar to you both as far as two working parents households,

904
00:41:19,040 --> 00:41:22,600
Speaker 3: but only two kids. Could definitely use that third sibling

905
00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:26,600
Speaker 3: in the world, so my values are also rooted in that.

906
00:41:26,719 --> 00:41:29,360
Speaker 3: And two, I've had to watch and financially help my

907
00:41:29,480 --> 00:41:33,240
Speaker 3: older by ten years struggling married with kids and dang

908
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:37,640
Speaker 3: ten plus years now, wait help my older by ten

909
00:41:37,719 --> 00:41:41,600
Speaker 3: years struggling old must be SI sibling married with kids

910
00:41:41,640 --> 00:41:43,840
Speaker 3: for ten plus years now, and believe a lot of

911
00:41:43,840 --> 00:41:46,400
Speaker 3: my desires are coming from there as well, me not

912
00:41:46,440 --> 00:41:49,799
Speaker 3: wanting to experience that. I understand that my sister's husband, Yeah,

913
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:53,080
Speaker 3: that's what we're talking about. Literally watches her struggle, be depressed,

914
00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:55,400
Speaker 3: scrape by and lean on me and my parents and

915
00:41:55,440 --> 00:41:58,719
Speaker 3: doesn't blink an eye. That's why she feels the way

916
00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:01,040
Speaker 3: she is fucking corny. At the end of the day,

917
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:03,560
Speaker 3: accountability is on my sister for being and staying in

918
00:42:03,560 --> 00:42:06,520
Speaker 3: this situation. Very true, But I do what I can

919
00:42:06,600 --> 00:42:09,960
Speaker 3: now with boundaries solely for my nieces. I understand that

920
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:12,839
Speaker 3: marriage will have seasons where it's not always going to

921
00:42:12,840 --> 00:42:16,040
Speaker 3: look the same as far as fifty to fifty, eighty twenty,

922
00:42:16,040 --> 00:42:18,040
Speaker 3: et cetera. I'm not looking for them to have a

923
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:20,760
Speaker 3: certain number, but I can't see myself with a partner

924
00:42:20,800 --> 00:42:23,320
Speaker 3: who would be okay with struggling and or just barely

925
00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:25,759
Speaker 3: making it long term. I do all for myself now

926
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:28,600
Speaker 3: and will continue to work towards growth. I'm naturally driven

927
00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:31,239
Speaker 3: and ambitious, so big brow and big systs. Should I

928
00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:34,480
Speaker 3: compromise on my values or should I tell my therapist

929
00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:35,560
Speaker 3: to shut that shit up?

930
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:39,000
Speaker 2: Shut that shit up, therapist? How dare you tell somebody

931
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:42,120
Speaker 2: that they should lower their sandals, their standards and just settle.

932
00:42:43,040 --> 00:42:48,320
Speaker 2: That's just literally a recipe for disaster. Lowering your standards

933
00:42:48,320 --> 00:42:51,120
Speaker 2: settling for somebody who is not in a growth mindset,

934
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:53,360
Speaker 2: and you have to end up struggling the fact that

935
00:42:53,400 --> 00:42:56,000
Speaker 2: you said that you're thirty six desire marriage and children,

936
00:42:56,040 --> 00:42:59,200
Speaker 2: but you are okay if it doesn't happen. I think

937
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:03,400
Speaker 2: is a good mindset to have. Yeah, yeah, because that's crazy.

938
00:43:03,760 --> 00:43:07,080
Speaker 3: I agree to me. The mindset is more important than

939
00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:09,919
Speaker 3: the dollar amount. A growth mindset means that no matter

940
00:43:09,960 --> 00:43:12,160
Speaker 3: what amount of money you make, you're always in a

941
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:14,640
Speaker 3: position where you're trying to get more, which means you

942
00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:16,880
Speaker 3: could be a multi millionaire, but you're like, hey, I

943
00:43:16,920 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 3: want to continue to grow. And a growth mindset also

944
00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 3: allows you to be with a person, a person who

945
00:43:22,600 --> 00:43:25,880
Speaker 3: welcomes change. You know, it's hard to be stuck with

946
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:28,160
Speaker 3: someone who only wants to be where they are in

947
00:43:28,200 --> 00:43:30,480
Speaker 3: that moment, because if you like to grow, which it

948
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:32,719
Speaker 3: seems like she likes to grow, how can you sit

949
00:43:32,760 --> 00:43:34,799
Speaker 3: there and settle with someone who doesn't. At this point,

950
00:43:34,800 --> 00:43:37,759
Speaker 3: it's not even about the dollar amount. It's about the

951
00:43:38,239 --> 00:43:38,960
Speaker 3: ability to.

952
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:40,800
Speaker 2: Change, to change much as.

953
00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:42,040
Speaker 1: I wouldn't settle at all.

954
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:45,319
Speaker 2: Absolutely not, And that is literally going to lead to resentment. Yes,

955
00:43:45,520 --> 00:43:47,480
Speaker 2: I can tell you right now, if you speak to

956
00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:50,960
Speaker 2: your sister, she probably resents her husband, yes, or watching

957
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:54,520
Speaker 2: her struggle and scrape and scrap around, And yeah, I've

958
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:58,560
Speaker 2: experienced this with family members. I've witnessed similar situations happen.

959
00:43:58,640 --> 00:43:59,800
Speaker 2: And I think you're doing the right thing where you

960
00:43:59,840 --> 00:44:02,520
Speaker 2: say you can now solely help to provide for your

961
00:44:02,560 --> 00:44:05,920
Speaker 2: nieces because they're here innocently based off of their parents,

962
00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:08,160
Speaker 2: and they shouldn't have to struggle as well either. So

963
00:44:08,280 --> 00:44:11,640
Speaker 2: I have been in spaces where I was deliberate, deliberate

964
00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:16,360
Speaker 2: about supporting or providing for somebody specifically within the household,

965
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,799
Speaker 2: because that's the person I care to provide for, and

966
00:44:18,840 --> 00:44:21,360
Speaker 2: then everybody else around that was there picking ass, not

967
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:22,880
Speaker 2: doing shit all day. Well, y'all had to figure that

968
00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:24,880
Speaker 2: shit out. I'm going to help what I need to

969
00:44:24,920 --> 00:44:26,759
Speaker 2: help or want to help in this moment, because if not,

970
00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:29,640
Speaker 2: all you're doing is further coddling the situation and giving

971
00:44:29,680 --> 00:44:32,000
Speaker 2: them a level of comfort that they're not ever going

972
00:44:32,040 --> 00:44:33,680
Speaker 2: to get out of. They're going to be relying on

973
00:44:33,719 --> 00:44:37,240
Speaker 2: you till that kingdom comes. So yeah, tell your therapists

974
00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:40,520
Speaker 2: that we ain't about that life. We're not about to settle.

975
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:42,600
Speaker 2: I agree you should not have to compromise on your

976
00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:45,640
Speaker 2: values and who's meant for you. As you continue to

977
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:48,400
Speaker 2: walk in your purpose of who you are, they'll meet you.

978
00:44:49,160 --> 00:44:49,759
Speaker 2: They'll meet you.

979
00:44:49,800 --> 00:44:50,600
Speaker 1: Can I say this too?

980
00:44:51,400 --> 00:44:53,600
Speaker 3: We do live in a time now with social media

981
00:44:53,640 --> 00:44:57,759
Speaker 3: that a lot everyone has the ability to have a platform,

982
00:44:57,800 --> 00:44:58,960
Speaker 3: which is fine.

983
00:44:59,360 --> 00:45:02,799
Speaker 1: Right, Just stay with me for a minute. How many

984
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:03,600
Speaker 1: people there on the earth.

985
00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:06,960
Speaker 3: Let's just say it's six billion, right, six billion are

986
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:10,560
Speaker 3: not going to be overachievers. What's happening now is that

987
00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:13,080
Speaker 3: I noticed that a lot of people who are overachievers,

988
00:45:13,080 --> 00:45:15,960
Speaker 3: who aspire more, they're now being shamed.

989
00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:19,200
Speaker 1: You know, you work too much. Your mental health is

990
00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:21,520
Speaker 1: going to suffer. You think you're better than people.

991
00:45:22,800 --> 00:45:28,080
Speaker 3: You should be comfortable being average, or be comfortable not trying.

992
00:45:28,120 --> 00:45:31,040
Speaker 2: Or you're part of Illuminati. Did you hear that Kevi

993
00:45:31,080 --> 00:45:33,120
Speaker 2: on stage just recently posted you said he first, he

994
00:45:33,160 --> 00:45:37,120
Speaker 2: got his first like Illuminati comments or something like that.

995
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:39,480
Speaker 2: I agree with him, though, and I'm just like, Okay,

996
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:40,279
Speaker 2: I agree with it.

997
00:45:40,280 --> 00:45:43,239
Speaker 3: But that's the mindset of these people that I'm talking about. No,

998
00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:47,840
Speaker 3: for sure the minute now, you you had to worship

999
00:45:47,920 --> 00:45:51,000
Speaker 3: the devil to get that. No, I just worked harder. Yeah,

1000
00:45:51,120 --> 00:45:52,000
Speaker 3: I thought more.

1001
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:55,120
Speaker 2: It's a way for people to validate their mediocrity. Yes,

1002
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:58,040
Speaker 2: and validate the stuff that you're not doing, because people

1003
00:45:58,080 --> 00:46:01,279
Speaker 2: are consistent, and they're working hard, and they're as every

1004
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:04,400
Speaker 2: day every day, and it eventually starts to come to

1005
00:46:04,480 --> 00:46:06,720
Speaker 2: fruition whatever it is you see the fruits of your labor.

1006
00:46:06,920 --> 00:46:09,440
Speaker 3: So, Mama, this is what I will tell you. If

1007
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:12,440
Speaker 3: you're listening to majority of the world who is going

1008
00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:15,839
Speaker 3: to tell you that it's okay to just settle, don't

1009
00:46:15,880 --> 00:46:18,239
Speaker 3: listen to them because it doesn't seem like anything you've

1010
00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:21,200
Speaker 3: ever done in your life has been about settling. So

1011
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:23,640
Speaker 3: if you haven't settled in any aspect of your life,

1012
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:26,440
Speaker 3: do not settle when it comes to picking a partner

1013
00:46:26,480 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 3: that you want to live the rest of your life with.

1014
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:31,279
Speaker 3: I don't care how many people tell you your standards are

1015
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:31,680
Speaker 3: too high.

1016
00:46:31,719 --> 00:46:32,399
Speaker 1: I don't care.

1017
00:46:32,760 --> 00:46:34,960
Speaker 3: Those people will never have to walk a mile in

1018
00:46:35,040 --> 00:46:36,800
Speaker 3: your shoes because they're your shoes.

1019
00:46:37,040 --> 00:46:37,440
Speaker 2: Period.

1020
00:46:37,480 --> 00:46:40,000
Speaker 3: Go get what you want. And here's another thing. Say

1021
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:42,759
Speaker 3: you don't get married and you don't have kids. You've

1022
00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:45,120
Speaker 3: worked your ass off, you can afford to adopt.

1023
00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:48,359
Speaker 2: It's given rich Auntie to You can afford.

1024
00:46:48,080 --> 00:46:50,000
Speaker 3: To just have you a couple guys that you play

1025
00:46:50,040 --> 00:46:52,120
Speaker 3: with if you need to get your rocks knocked off

1026
00:46:52,120 --> 00:46:52,480
Speaker 3: a little bit.

1027
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:55,600
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Like what I'm saying is right.

1028
00:46:55,719 --> 00:46:57,640
Speaker 3: What I'm saying is if you want to be swapped,

1029
00:46:59,200 --> 00:47:02,960
Speaker 3: don't don't settle because other people are telling you you

1030
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:04,200
Speaker 3: should be comfortable settling.

1031
00:47:05,080 --> 00:47:07,960
Speaker 1: Therapist, I don't care. You know in your heart what

1032
00:47:08,040 --> 00:47:08,479
Speaker 1: you want.

1033
00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,719
Speaker 3: Don't let people shame you for warning more from yourself

1034
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:14,439
Speaker 3: or more out of your person. At the same time,

1035
00:47:14,520 --> 00:47:17,800
Speaker 3: don't shame people who don't want more. We're not shaming them.

1036
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:20,400
Speaker 3: You know what you want the same way I know

1037
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:22,560
Speaker 3: what I want. And when you know what you want,

1038
00:47:22,680 --> 00:47:24,120
Speaker 3: go out and get it because you deserve it.

1039
00:47:24,280 --> 00:47:27,080
Speaker 2: Period poo. All right on to the next one. My

1040
00:47:27,160 --> 00:47:30,160
Speaker 2: husband and I are hardworking to pay off a three

1041
00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:35,200
Speaker 2: hundred thousand dollars debt, mostly business debt, half of which

1042
00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:38,719
Speaker 2: has amassed from specifically a bad business deal with an

1043
00:47:38,719 --> 00:47:41,640
Speaker 2: immediate family member on my side who left us with

1044
00:47:41,719 --> 00:47:45,520
Speaker 2: all the bills and no help after one year in business. Yikes.

1045
00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:48,839
Speaker 2: We both now work corporate jobs making four hundred k

1046
00:47:48,960 --> 00:47:52,840
Speaker 2: a year. As a household my husband was self employed

1047
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:55,719
Speaker 2: for a year trying to manage the businesses. He also

1048
00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:58,839
Speaker 2: has a property that he also has a property that

1049
00:47:58,920 --> 00:48:01,759
Speaker 2: he doesn't do a good job managing, so we pay

1050
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:06,000
Speaker 2: its mortgage while no one is living there. It's not familiar. Yeah,

1051
00:48:06,160 --> 00:48:08,560
Speaker 2: you know somebody else has been through this. It needs

1052
00:48:08,560 --> 00:48:11,040
Speaker 2: repairs before we can sell it. His family has lived

1053
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:13,320
Speaker 2: there in the past when needing to get on their feet,

1054
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:16,920
Speaker 2: but never paid us. My husband lacks the focus to

1055
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 2: rent it out, being that he now works full time.

1056
00:48:20,560 --> 00:48:23,680
Speaker 2: All of this is very stressful individually. I wish he

1057
00:48:23,719 --> 00:48:26,360
Speaker 2: could take charge of it all. But take charge of

1058
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:29,120
Speaker 2: all of this, but I'm the more detail oriented partner

1059
00:48:29,440 --> 00:48:32,680
Speaker 2: and the realist slash warrior, while he is more of

1060
00:48:32,760 --> 00:48:36,719
Speaker 2: the constant optimist. How do we say hopeful and keep

1061
00:48:36,719 --> 00:48:41,320
Speaker 2: this from splitting us apart? Signed Sleepless and newlywed hood

1062
00:48:42,040 --> 00:48:44,560
Speaker 2: and married man.

1063
00:48:45,560 --> 00:48:48,799
Speaker 3: Well, the first thing, the first thing stop doing is

1064
00:48:48,800 --> 00:48:52,600
Speaker 3: stop saying your family my family, because that creates resentment.

1065
00:48:52,680 --> 00:48:54,400
Speaker 3: You know, your family got us into this deal, but

1066
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:56,600
Speaker 3: your family lived in this house. When you start the

1067
00:48:56,640 --> 00:49:00,239
Speaker 3: blame game, that's when it becomes more personal. And you

1068
00:49:00,280 --> 00:49:02,880
Speaker 3: guys have married your one union, so it's both your family.

1069
00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:04,840
Speaker 3: So deal with the fact that both of your families

1070
00:49:04,840 --> 00:49:10,080
Speaker 3: are fucked up freeloaders. So what and here's your truth? No, seriously,

1071
00:49:10,719 --> 00:49:12,000
Speaker 3: you guys make four hundred K year.

1072
00:49:12,040 --> 00:49:14,480
Speaker 1: I don't know. Did she say they have kids?

1073
00:49:14,840 --> 00:49:16,680
Speaker 2: I didn't see. They're new the weed, so maybe they

1074
00:49:16,680 --> 00:49:17,080
Speaker 2: don't do.

1075
00:49:17,600 --> 00:49:18,200
Speaker 1: Don't have kids?

1076
00:49:18,200 --> 00:49:21,239
Speaker 3: You make four hundred k year after taxes, you you

1077
00:49:21,239 --> 00:49:22,600
Speaker 3: know they're probably going to tax you. I don't know

1078
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:25,480
Speaker 3: how they pay their taxes, but at least forty percent,

1079
00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:26,600
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying.

1080
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:28,279
Speaker 1: So that's what one hundred and sixty k out of it.

1081
00:49:28,320 --> 00:49:30,320
Speaker 3: So you make two hundred and forty which is twenty

1082
00:49:30,360 --> 00:49:32,200
Speaker 3: thousand dollars a month you make.

1083
00:49:32,960 --> 00:49:34,120
Speaker 1: The first thing you should do.

1084
00:49:34,080 --> 00:49:37,399
Speaker 3: Since you have business debt is try to invest as

1085
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:39,560
Speaker 3: much as you can front paying off that business debt

1086
00:49:39,600 --> 00:49:41,920
Speaker 3: because that's a tax right off, which means if you

1087
00:49:41,960 --> 00:49:43,239
Speaker 3: pay that business debt up front and.

1088
00:49:43,200 --> 00:49:45,240
Speaker 1: Tax right off, you'll get it back in your taxes.

1089
00:49:45,520 --> 00:49:46,120
Speaker 2: That's a good point.

1090
00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:48,439
Speaker 1: Yeah. And then and once you put the business debt

1091
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:49,319
Speaker 1: up front.

1092
00:49:49,680 --> 00:49:53,040
Speaker 3: And then pay all of your bills afterwards, you'll have

1093
00:49:53,120 --> 00:49:56,319
Speaker 3: more money to get that done with. For example, if

1094
00:49:56,360 --> 00:49:59,440
Speaker 3: you make five dollars, right, you make five dollars and

1095
00:49:59,480 --> 00:50:02,719
Speaker 3: you pay all your bills first, and then you save

1096
00:50:02,880 --> 00:50:04,799
Speaker 3: and do everything like that. They're going to tax you

1097
00:50:04,880 --> 00:50:07,640
Speaker 3: higher because you had no ride offs. You have five

1098
00:50:07,680 --> 00:50:11,880
Speaker 3: dollars and you have this two dollars tax debt, and

1099
00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:13,839
Speaker 3: you pay that first. Now they're only going to tax

1100
00:50:13,880 --> 00:50:16,800
Speaker 3: you on three dollars. So then you pay your taxes

1101
00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:19,040
Speaker 3: and then pay your bills. So the taxes on the

1102
00:50:19,080 --> 00:50:21,280
Speaker 3: three dollars, of course, would be less than the taxes

1103
00:50:21,320 --> 00:50:23,440
Speaker 3: on the five dollars. So what you have to do

1104
00:50:23,480 --> 00:50:25,960
Speaker 3: is put that business debt up front, let the government

1105
00:50:26,000 --> 00:50:28,560
Speaker 3: know that you're paying off business debt. Use the current

1106
00:50:28,600 --> 00:50:31,040
Speaker 3: money that you have to pay off the business debt,

1107
00:50:31,400 --> 00:50:33,120
Speaker 3: and then now you'll get tax at the lower rates,

1108
00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:35,680
Speaker 3: so you have more money to use for your personal expenses.

1109
00:50:36,239 --> 00:50:38,160
Speaker 3: That's the biggest thing I can give you. That's just

1110
00:50:38,160 --> 00:50:40,360
Speaker 3: a business thing. Because they seem like they're a young company, you're.

1111
00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:43,759
Speaker 2: Young couple trying to figure things out. Yeah, she also said, no, no,

1112
00:50:43,520 --> 00:50:44,120
Speaker 2: finish your thought.

1113
00:50:44,719 --> 00:50:46,160
Speaker 3: What I was going to say is on top of that,

1114
00:50:46,160 --> 00:50:48,640
Speaker 3: that's just from the financial aspect, on top of the

1115
00:50:48,680 --> 00:50:52,000
Speaker 3: communication aspect. They should have every day at the end

1116
00:50:52,040 --> 00:50:55,200
Speaker 3: of the night, where are we financially what are we

1117
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:58,400
Speaker 3: trying to do as a family moving forward, but also

1118
00:50:58,440 --> 00:51:00,719
Speaker 3: what are we trying to do for ourselves? Because if

1119
00:51:00,800 --> 00:51:03,120
Speaker 3: everything is always a focus on the business debt and

1120
00:51:03,160 --> 00:51:05,680
Speaker 3: your family did this, and my family did this, especially

1121
00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:07,960
Speaker 3: as newlyweds, your focus is only on the.

1122
00:51:07,920 --> 00:51:10,200
Speaker 2: Negative, right, and on the finance portion of it, because

1123
00:51:10,280 --> 00:51:12,279
Speaker 2: that seems to be where a lot of couples, you know,

1124
00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:12,880
Speaker 2: fall apart.

1125
00:51:12,960 --> 00:51:15,279
Speaker 3: They said eighty percent of couples that get divorced get

1126
00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:18,960
Speaker 3: divorced not because of infidelity, because of financial issues and woes.

1127
00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,160
Speaker 3: You can avoid some of that, like I said before,

1128
00:51:22,200 --> 00:51:24,680
Speaker 3: by putting a plan in place to pay that debt down,

1129
00:51:24,840 --> 00:51:28,399
Speaker 3: but also using part of that money to still love

1130
00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:28,960
Speaker 3: on each other.

1131
00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:29,440
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1132
00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:31,479
Speaker 3: You know, if you make twenty thousand dollars a month,

1133
00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:35,040
Speaker 3: and that's after taxes, you make twenty thousand dollars after

1134
00:51:35,080 --> 00:51:37,560
Speaker 3: a month, Let's say your mortgage is five thousand a month,

1135
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:40,359
Speaker 3: that's fifteen You got two card notes, that's another three

1136
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:42,880
Speaker 3: thousand dollars, and you got twelve thousand dollars that you

1137
00:51:42,920 --> 00:51:45,279
Speaker 3: can still use. Okay, you got to pay a little

1138
00:51:45,280 --> 00:51:47,360
Speaker 3: bit of bills here. Okay, say you put three thousand

1139
00:51:47,400 --> 00:51:50,120
Speaker 3: dollars towards bills and food and stuff. You still have

1140
00:51:50,200 --> 00:51:53,600
Speaker 3: nine thousand dollars a month that you can use, right,

1141
00:51:53,880 --> 00:51:57,799
Speaker 3: you spend five thousand to pay off that debt. Four

1142
00:51:57,840 --> 00:52:02,080
Speaker 3: thousand dollars a month is for you, guys, to save.

1143
00:52:02,000 --> 00:52:03,640
Speaker 1: And do things that you can haven't build with.

1144
00:52:03,880 --> 00:52:06,160
Speaker 3: I gave them all the biggest numbers out right, But

1145
00:52:06,239 --> 00:52:09,000
Speaker 3: with that four thousand thousand a month, forty eight thousand dollars.

1146
00:52:08,800 --> 00:52:12,040
Speaker 1: For a year, you can travel and enjoy your.

1147
00:52:11,920 --> 00:52:15,000
Speaker 2: Life, do something and kid on those state nights. Like, yeah,

1148
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:17,440
Speaker 2: you do need to pour into your marriages born to you,

1149
00:52:17,719 --> 00:52:21,200
Speaker 2: and I also want to say, as newlyweds, there's also

1150
00:52:21,200 --> 00:52:24,160
Speaker 2: like a sacrificial period that I feel like most couples

1151
00:52:24,200 --> 00:52:26,160
Speaker 2: have when they're starting their life together. Deval and I

1152
00:52:26,200 --> 00:52:27,719
Speaker 2: had it. We always say the first five years of

1153
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:30,800
Speaker 2: our marriage was just really difficult. We two had financial

1154
00:52:30,840 --> 00:52:32,680
Speaker 2: struggles and things that we were trying to work through

1155
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:34,520
Speaker 2: as well, but at the root of it, we knew

1156
00:52:34,520 --> 00:52:36,680
Speaker 2: that we wanted to stay together. We had a new

1157
00:52:36,719 --> 00:52:39,520
Speaker 2: baby at the time, Like that was the core of it.

1158
00:52:39,600 --> 00:52:41,799
Speaker 2: Was trying to work around it. Your husband saying he

1159
00:52:42,239 --> 00:52:45,120
Speaker 2: lacks focus because he has a full time job, people

1160
00:52:45,160 --> 00:52:47,319
Speaker 2: have two full time jobs, people have a full time

1161
00:52:47,320 --> 00:52:49,959
Speaker 2: at a part time job. Let the focus be full

1162
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:52,239
Speaker 2: time job. But then when you clock out, this is

1163
00:52:52,239 --> 00:52:53,759
Speaker 2: a priority if you guys want to get out of

1164
00:52:53,760 --> 00:52:56,040
Speaker 2: that dead. So maybe having the conversation with him saying Babe,

1165
00:52:56,080 --> 00:52:57,839
Speaker 2: I know that full time work can be a lot

1166
00:52:57,880 --> 00:53:00,560
Speaker 2: and it can be stressful, but in the time that

1167
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:03,080
Speaker 2: we have or the time that we create, there needs

1168
00:53:03,080 --> 00:53:04,879
Speaker 2: to be a plan to get this space rented out

1169
00:53:04,920 --> 00:53:07,720
Speaker 2: so we're not paying to mortgages or in a mortgage,

1170
00:53:07,840 --> 00:53:09,759
Speaker 2: or there needs to be a way to offset some

1171
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:12,759
Speaker 2: of that cost and take on that responsibility as well.

1172
00:53:12,800 --> 00:53:15,479
Speaker 2: And this is another thing in closing, it'd be hard

1173
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:16,840
Speaker 2: to go into business with family.

1174
00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:17,640
Speaker 1: Facts.

1175
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:19,920
Speaker 2: It's so hard to go into business with family. And

1176
00:53:19,920 --> 00:53:22,480
Speaker 2: it's hard to be in business with people who you

1177
00:53:22,520 --> 00:53:26,600
Speaker 2: look view as family too sometimes because when things fall apart, chiall,

1178
00:53:26,680 --> 00:53:29,000
Speaker 2: they can fall apart and they may be irreupparable. So

1179
00:53:29,560 --> 00:53:31,279
Speaker 2: shout out to you guys for writing and thank you

1180
00:53:31,360 --> 00:53:34,520
Speaker 2: so much and good luck as y'all continue to work

1181
00:53:34,560 --> 00:53:36,560
Speaker 2: off this debt while staying together and.

1182
00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:38,359
Speaker 1: Stop letting your family stay in that house and not

1183
00:53:38,400 --> 00:53:39,919
Speaker 1: pay rent. That's unfair. To you guys.

1184
00:53:40,040 --> 00:53:42,879
Speaker 3: Man, you guys are working hard, make good money. Yeah,

1185
00:53:42,960 --> 00:53:46,600
Speaker 3: don't don't let that like that's too stressful. It's too stressful. Man.

1186
00:53:46,640 --> 00:53:49,880
Speaker 3: When you have business, make sure that you get LLCs

1187
00:53:50,120 --> 00:53:53,400
Speaker 3: and do everything above board. Protect yourself, especially with dealing

1188
00:53:53,440 --> 00:53:56,560
Speaker 3: with family. Have contracts so that there's no arguments. But

1189
00:53:56,680 --> 00:54:01,360
Speaker 3: you said, fuck what we said contract pay all that paper?

1190
00:54:01,680 --> 00:54:02,799
Speaker 1: When does your family do that?

1191
00:54:03,160 --> 00:54:04,880
Speaker 2: So we got a baby crying, we gotta go. No,

1192
00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:07,120
Speaker 2: just kidding, all right, y'all. If you want to be

1193
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:09,439
Speaker 2: featured as a listener letter, email us at dead ass

1194
00:54:09,440 --> 00:54:11,200
Speaker 2: Advice at gmail dot com.

1195
00:54:11,200 --> 00:54:13,600
Speaker 3: That's d E A D A S S A d

1196
00:54:13,719 --> 00:54:16,319
Speaker 3: V I c E at gmail dot com.

1197
00:54:16,360 --> 00:54:18,799
Speaker 2: And also use that email as well. Put in the

1198
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:21,200
Speaker 2: subject so Tripple will know a day with K like

1199
00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:23,080
Speaker 2: suggestion or a day with K I did. If there's

1200
00:54:23,080 --> 00:54:25,000
Speaker 2: something that you guys want to share, If you know

1201
00:54:25,040 --> 00:54:27,600
Speaker 2: a local business, you know somebody who could be great

1202
00:54:27,640 --> 00:54:29,640
Speaker 2: for the show, pop that in there as well.

1203
00:54:29,640 --> 00:54:31,799
Speaker 3: Once again, So just to be clear, we are coming

1204
00:54:31,840 --> 00:54:35,440
Speaker 3: to Chicago, we're coming to la we are going to Florida,

1205
00:54:35,480 --> 00:54:36,680
Speaker 3: and we are going to Houston.

1206
00:54:37,160 --> 00:54:38,440
Speaker 1: So we'll see you in September.

1207
00:54:38,480 --> 00:54:42,600
Speaker 2: Baby cannot wait. All right, y'all, moment of truth time.

1208
00:54:43,239 --> 00:54:45,520
Speaker 2: We're talking a day with K and what that's going

1209
00:54:45,600 --> 00:54:47,960
Speaker 2: to look like. Okay, so you said you had a

1210
00:54:47,960 --> 00:54:50,040
Speaker 2: moment in the beginning of the show. Sorry, go ahead.

1211
00:54:50,080 --> 00:54:52,879
Speaker 1: This is the most selfish moment of truth ever.

1212
00:54:53,360 --> 00:54:54,600
Speaker 2: What is it? You want to see me? The lea

1213
00:54:54,640 --> 00:54:58,280
Speaker 2: tard again? I know, No, don't worry all the Lea's ours.

1214
00:54:58,560 --> 00:55:01,400
Speaker 2: Let's be clear that SI he had me aware for

1215
00:55:01,640 --> 00:55:04,799
Speaker 2: the show. I have in my fun box, which I

1216
00:55:04,880 --> 00:55:06,200
Speaker 2: like to call it, have a drawer.

1217
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:08,520
Speaker 1: You do have a fun box?

1218
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:13,960
Speaker 3: You felt like, how could you say that that was going.

1219
00:55:13,840 --> 00:55:16,000
Speaker 2: To be too quick? And forget who I'm talking alongside?

1220
00:55:16,560 --> 00:55:20,080
Speaker 2: I have a fun drawer, so fun drawers to come on?

1221
00:55:20,160 --> 00:55:24,640
Speaker 3: Try another one, fun box ant fun draws and.

1222
00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:26,000
Speaker 1: Try it again. What do you got?

1223
00:55:26,239 --> 00:55:30,400
Speaker 2: I have a fun area in my class be fun

1224
00:55:30,880 --> 00:55:33,880
Speaker 2: that I have been recycling those outfits with.

1225
00:55:34,160 --> 00:55:41,040
Speaker 3: But yeah, seriously, I cannot wait to brag about my wife.

1226
00:55:41,320 --> 00:55:42,680
Speaker 2: Even more than you do already.

1227
00:55:42,719 --> 00:55:44,759
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, no, no, no no no. You think I

1228
00:55:44,840 --> 00:55:45,480
Speaker 1: was bragging?

1229
00:55:45,719 --> 00:55:51,239
Speaker 3: Now wait until you are on tour selling out theaters

1230
00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:54,080
Speaker 3: and I cannot wait. Like I look at the way

1231
00:55:54,840 --> 00:55:57,720
Speaker 3: jay Z looks at Beyonce. You know what I'm saying.

1232
00:55:58,000 --> 00:55:59,920
Speaker 1: I look at the way a Sap looks at Rihanna.

1233
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:02,399
Speaker 1: I just look. I look at some of these men

1234
00:56:02,440 --> 00:56:04,520
Speaker 1: who have careers in their own right.

1235
00:56:04,920 --> 00:56:07,760
Speaker 2: Joey bad sincerit. They're like my newest like young couple.

1236
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:09,120
Speaker 1: I love remember watching.

1237
00:56:08,880 --> 00:56:13,040
Speaker 2: The Essence Black Women in Hollywood. Beautiful couple, and they

1238
00:56:13,080 --> 00:56:14,919
Speaker 2: just are so into each other, and I love it.

1239
00:56:14,920 --> 00:56:15,359
Speaker 1: It's great.

1240
00:56:15,360 --> 00:56:18,919
Speaker 3: It's great to be a man and have your own

1241
00:56:18,960 --> 00:56:22,279
Speaker 3: career and your your own greatness and your own right.

1242
00:56:22,719 --> 00:56:25,320
Speaker 1: But to be able to say, like, that's my wife.

1243
00:56:26,160 --> 00:56:29,120
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying, Like, I can't wait for

1244
00:56:29,200 --> 00:56:34,200
Speaker 3: people to be like, oh, Yukas, Yeah, yeah.

1245
00:56:33,080 --> 00:56:35,120
Speaker 2: That's that's how I feel. Is your wife. I'm like

1246
00:56:35,360 --> 00:56:35,760
Speaker 2: my husband.

1247
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:37,040
Speaker 1: That's why I can't wait.

1248
00:56:37,080 --> 00:56:40,880
Speaker 2: I can't wagest fans since you were eighteen, right, it's crazy.

1249
00:56:41,280 --> 00:56:44,799
Speaker 2: My moment of truth is pretty simple. I literally could

1250
00:56:44,800 --> 00:56:47,279
Speaker 2: not do this without you, guys, like I literally could

1251
00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:50,719
Speaker 2: not you devour shout out to the team Josh, Matt

1252
00:56:50,719 --> 00:56:52,839
Speaker 2: and Tripple who are here every month doing the Dead

1253
00:56:52,840 --> 00:56:55,920
Speaker 2: Ass podcast and then who have also spoken so much

1254
00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:59,280
Speaker 2: life into me. And and and make me believe even

1255
00:56:59,320 --> 00:57:02,800
Speaker 2: more in my that I'm capable of this. Brian Jordan Junr,

1256
00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:05,000
Speaker 2: who recently added the team, be added to the team

1257
00:57:05,040 --> 00:57:07,879
Speaker 2: for the Love Against the World tour. Just so many

1258
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:10,799
Speaker 2: you know, my glam team. Everybody just like pours into

1259
00:57:10,840 --> 00:57:13,399
Speaker 2: me and praise over me, and I'm so grateful for them.

1260
00:57:13,440 --> 00:57:17,120
Speaker 2: I'm grateful for y'all for listening, for watching. Thank you,

1261
00:57:17,240 --> 00:57:19,640
Speaker 2: and I look forward to seeing you in this new space,

1262
00:57:19,720 --> 00:57:21,720
Speaker 2: in this new era of Kadeen as I introduce you

1263
00:57:21,760 --> 00:57:26,520
Speaker 2: to more of me slowly but surely slowly. But no,

1264
00:57:26,560 --> 00:57:28,400
Speaker 2: it's not the fun box, for the fun drawer or

1265
00:57:28,440 --> 00:57:31,880
Speaker 2: the fun anything. It's all the fun all right, all right,

1266
00:57:32,600 --> 00:57:34,360
Speaker 2: But be sure you bring the fun to me when

1267
00:57:34,360 --> 00:57:37,040
Speaker 2: we have our shows. And also be sure to follow

1268
00:57:37,080 --> 00:57:39,520
Speaker 2: us on Patreon if you have not been doing so yet,

1269
00:57:39,920 --> 00:57:44,120
Speaker 2: subscribe so that you can see all exclusive content between

1270
00:57:44,200 --> 00:57:47,920
Speaker 2: dead Ass podcasts, video, Elli's family content, a Day with

1271
00:57:48,000 --> 00:57:50,760
Speaker 2: K and then of course that's going to be uh well,

1272
00:57:50,800 --> 00:57:53,280
Speaker 2: a Day with K content as well, and just more

1273
00:57:53,280 --> 00:57:55,600
Speaker 2: family content there. You can follow us on social media

1274
00:57:55,600 --> 00:57:57,560
Speaker 2: also dead Ass the podcast, and you can find me

1275
00:57:57,600 --> 00:57:58,320
Speaker 2: at Kadeen I.

1276
00:57:58,280 --> 00:58:00,360
Speaker 3: Am and I am devout and if you listen on

1277
00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:03,920
Speaker 3: Apple Podcasts, be sure to rate, review and subscribe.

1278
00:58:04,040 --> 00:58:09,800
Speaker 4: Dead Ass Baby Got dead Ass is a production of

1279
00:58:09,880 --> 00:58:14,120
Speaker 4: iHeartMedia podcast Network and is produced by Donor Opinya and Tribble.

1280
00:58:14,400 --> 00:58:16,960
Speaker 3: Follow the podcast on social media at dead Ass the

1281
00:58:17,000 --> 00:58:18,680
Speaker 3: Podcast and never miss a Thing