1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,080 Speaker 1: I think my girlfriend is in love with her best 2 00:00:02,080 --> 00:00:04,400 Speaker 1: friend and that she just settled for me. 3 00:00:05,320 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 2: Never want to have someone settle us. They're a gold 4 00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:11,640 Speaker 2: digger and they're like trying to have the gold. 5 00:00:11,560 --> 00:00:13,640 Speaker 1: Settle true, man, that's the only reason. 6 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:16,320 Speaker 2: That's for cash. Just settle for cash and cash a low. 7 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: Yeah. Sorry for the long post. I didn't realize how 8 00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:21,560 Speaker 1: much I had to say until I got it all 9 00:00:21,600 --> 00:00:24,520 Speaker 1: typed out. Thanks in advance to anyone who reads all 10 00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:27,639 Speaker 1: of this. I've been with my girlfriend Jordan for a 11 00:00:27,680 --> 00:00:30,400 Speaker 1: little over two years. We lived together and we have 12 00:00:30,440 --> 00:00:34,200 Speaker 1: two cats, and up until this weekend, I genuinely thought 13 00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:39,760 Speaker 1: that everything was perfect in our relationship. Classic mistake. Welcome 14 00:00:39,760 --> 00:00:40,280 Speaker 1: to reddits. 15 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:41,720 Speaker 2: How would you think that? 16 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:44,880 Speaker 1: Which I know is what everyone says to these posts. 17 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,920 Speaker 1: But I was really thinking that I was going to 18 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:50,880 Speaker 1: ask her to marry me sometime in the next year. 19 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:55,960 Speaker 1: Who would ever do that? Yeah? Right, not anyone sitting 20 00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:58,760 Speaker 1: in the producer chair. We don't ever get into these arguments. 21 00:00:58,920 --> 00:01:01,920 Speaker 1: Jordan is very sweet and easygoing and normally we just 22 00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:06,280 Speaker 1: mesh well on everything. Honestly, if everything in our relationship 23 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,959 Speaker 1: hasn't been so good up to this point, I probably 24 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,760 Speaker 1: would have just broken up with her this weekend on 25 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:15,840 Speaker 1: the spots, but because things have truly been so perfect, 26 00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:17,720 Speaker 1: I'm not sure if I may be jumping to the 27 00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:21,319 Speaker 1: wrong conclusion about what to do because my feelings got 28 00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:24,080 Speaker 1: so hurt. By the way. This comes from throwway of 29 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:27,600 Speaker 1: Lavender on the Bru Updates supper at It. The other 30 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:32,120 Speaker 1: person who's important in this story is Jordan's friend Mark. Okay, 31 00:01:32,319 --> 00:01:33,920 Speaker 1: I see you in the comments. I see you. 32 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:36,040 Speaker 2: Mark's about to make his mark oh on. 33 00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 1: Jordan oh besays she's known the best friend Mark for 34 00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:43,760 Speaker 1: their whole lives because they both grew up in the 35 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:47,120 Speaker 1: same small religious community. Jordan isn't a part of that 36 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:50,000 Speaker 1: religion anymore. She decided to leave the church when she 37 00:01:50,120 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 1: was I think nineteen and moved to the state that 38 00:01:52,760 --> 00:01:55,320 Speaker 1: we live in now. Mark still is in the religion 39 00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,480 Speaker 1: and apparently takes it very seriously. I am told he 40 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:01,720 Speaker 1: now works for the church back in Jordan's hometown. Also, 41 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:04,200 Speaker 1: as far as I know, Mark is the only person 42 00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:07,680 Speaker 1: from the religious community that Jordan still talks with besides 43 00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 1: her parents, which I'm mentioning because I now think it 44 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:13,280 Speaker 1: could be a red flag. 45 00:02:13,680 --> 00:02:16,200 Speaker 2: Uh oh, I mean, it seems like they have so 46 00:02:16,280 --> 00:02:18,920 Speaker 2: much in common. They're all part of the same religion. 47 00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:21,239 Speaker 1: They get on their knees for the same renown each. 48 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:24,560 Speaker 2: Other for the like so long. You know, got a 49 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:27,119 Speaker 2: little bit of holy water sprinkle on both of them. 50 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:28,480 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, just. 51 00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:29,920 Speaker 2: Doused super holy. 52 00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:32,880 Speaker 1: So on Saturday, I met Mark for the first time 53 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,240 Speaker 1: because he was in our city and Jordan wanted us 54 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:37,800 Speaker 1: all to have dinner together. Now, at this point, I 55 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:40,440 Speaker 1: wanted to say, I will admit that when we were 56 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:43,480 Speaker 1: first dating and I found out about I found out 57 00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:45,960 Speaker 1: that Jordan had a best friend who was a guy, 58 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:49,760 Speaker 1: I didn't really like it, especially because it seemed like 59 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:51,440 Speaker 1: they were on FaceTime with each. 60 00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:54,200 Speaker 2: Other a lot, just be in a relationship. 61 00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:56,600 Speaker 1: You remember that Riley was the story we read a 62 00:02:56,639 --> 00:02:58,120 Speaker 1: few days ago. Or it was like, oh yeah, they 63 00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:01,120 Speaker 1: were just like holding hands and sharing each other's hoodies 64 00:03:01,160 --> 00:03:03,720 Speaker 1: and living together. But they were just best friends, you know, 65 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:07,000 Speaker 1: kissing friend kisses on the cheek, you know, calling each 66 00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:09,480 Speaker 1: other babe and sweetheart. Oh yeah, that one was wild. 67 00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:14,840 Speaker 2: Quick. Okay, story time. I have a friend that was 68 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:19,760 Speaker 2: dating a girl. She moved away and moved in with 69 00:03:20,120 --> 00:03:23,919 Speaker 2: her friend that they both knew. It's a guy, and 70 00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:26,800 Speaker 2: then they went on a break and they're like they 71 00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:28,079 Speaker 2: kind of were like, oh, we're not going to hook 72 00:03:28,160 --> 00:03:30,560 Speaker 2: up with anyone that we know, and he was always 73 00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:33,040 Speaker 2: suspicious of this other guy that she was living with. 74 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:36,240 Speaker 2: They started hooking up, and now we're in a relationship 75 00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:38,480 Speaker 2: and now she's writing songs about how like this is 76 00:03:38,520 --> 00:03:40,240 Speaker 2: like the love of her life and stuff. 77 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:47,000 Speaker 1: We were on a break sucks. That's crazy. Since it 78 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:49,400 Speaker 1: was a childhood friend. They mostly didn't see each other 79 00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:52,720 Speaker 1: in person, and I just trusted Jordan that Mark was 80 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:54,760 Speaker 1: only a friend and didn't let it bother me, and 81 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,600 Speaker 1: eventually I got over it. So when we were going 82 00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:00,320 Speaker 1: to dinner, I wasn't jealous or suspicious of Mark at all, 83 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:02,480 Speaker 1: like a lot of time in past since then, if anything, 84 00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:05,000 Speaker 1: I was someone excited to finally be meeting him, since 85 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:07,800 Speaker 1: I've been hearing about him for two years. But the 86 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,720 Speaker 1: way Jordan and Mark acted at dinner is what convinced 87 00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:13,880 Speaker 1: me that there's something going on there other than just 88 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:15,920 Speaker 1: being best friends. 89 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:17,440 Speaker 2: What's going on? 90 00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:18,200 Speaker 1: What's going on? 91 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:22,200 Speaker 2: Well, what's going on? Maybe they started kissing at the table. 92 00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,080 Speaker 2: This is just like our secret handshake. 93 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:30,360 Speaker 1: Well, that's crazy with our tongues. The other story read, 94 00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:32,000 Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, they were like kissing each other and 95 00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:33,839 Speaker 1: cheating and calling each other sweetheart and babe. But like, 96 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,120 Speaker 1: I don't know, like is it wrong? Am I the 97 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:40,640 Speaker 1: ahole for being mad? And it's like, dude, yes, it's. 98 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:44,120 Speaker 2: Just our kooky little way of communicating this, you know, well, like. 99 00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:47,000 Speaker 1: The random Now, I honestly don't even know how to 100 00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:49,560 Speaker 1: describe it except to say that I've never seen two 101 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:52,960 Speaker 1: people act more obviously like they were in love with 102 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 1: each other. They literally would not stop touching each other. Oh, 103 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,839 Speaker 1: I mean that's a big one. Uh. They were constantly 104 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:01,440 Speaker 1: touching each other's arms and shoulders, and at some points 105 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 1: they were actually even holding hands friendship hand. 106 00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:09,839 Speaker 2: Holding friendship friendship hands especially I hold all my friend's hands. 107 00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:13,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly. But they completely left me out of the conversation. 108 00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:16,279 Speaker 1: And we're laughing about inside jokes, and every time they laugh, 109 00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:19,240 Speaker 1: they do this thing where they'd put their foreheads together 110 00:05:20,279 --> 00:05:22,760 Speaker 1: or that was when they just be holding hands. 111 00:05:23,760 --> 00:05:25,960 Speaker 3: Anything that has anything to do with the forehead is 112 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:28,360 Speaker 3: too intimate. And that is boyfriend girlfriend territory. 113 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:31,400 Speaker 2: And that's what Riley said. And really, you know, someone 114 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:34,120 Speaker 2: that we mutually know has really run with that that 115 00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:36,760 Speaker 2: you said and is. 116 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:39,560 Speaker 1: Trying to just go forehead to forehead. 117 00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:46,240 Speaker 2: Well, yeah, Riley said, forehead kisses are exclusive for a relationship. 118 00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:48,800 Speaker 3: It's basically like I will protect you for any cost 119 00:05:48,839 --> 00:05:50,600 Speaker 3: and nothing bad will happen to you. You were doing that 120 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:51,400 Speaker 3: when you kiss someone. 121 00:05:51,279 --> 00:05:54,599 Speaker 2: On the forehead. I had no idea. I mean, someone 122 00:05:54,640 --> 00:05:55,960 Speaker 2: who was at me had no idea. 123 00:05:57,320 --> 00:05:59,760 Speaker 1: Also, they were just looking at each other in a 124 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:03,080 Speaker 1: way that he didn't feel comfortable with at all. It was, honestly, 125 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:06,920 Speaker 1: even worse than the touching. It wasn't just how anyone 126 00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:09,800 Speaker 1: would look at somebody they're supposedly just friends with. I'm 127 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:13,000 Speaker 1: one hundred percent sure that every stranger looking at our 128 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,680 Speaker 1: table thought that Jordan and Mark were the couple and 129 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:18,640 Speaker 1: I was her brother or something, dude, not even her 130 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:22,000 Speaker 1: fred or brother. It's crazy. Oh that's horrible. I felt 131 00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:24,880 Speaker 1: like a third real the whole time, and Jordan didn't 132 00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,040 Speaker 1: even notice how awkward she was making it for me 133 00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:29,920 Speaker 1: because she was way too focused on Mark and all 134 00:06:29,960 --> 00:06:33,039 Speaker 1: the attention that she was getting from him. And that's 135 00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:35,839 Speaker 1: not really like Jordan at all. Usually she's a lot 136 00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 1: more considerate and would notice immediately if I wasn't having 137 00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:41,599 Speaker 1: a good time, or if she was accidentally being rude 138 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:43,000 Speaker 1: and excluding someone at the table. 139 00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:45,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, but she's got to pay attention to her boyfriend. 140 00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:46,320 Speaker 2: She hasn't seen him in a while. 141 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:49,320 Speaker 1: There's her boyfriend in love of her life. 142 00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:52,359 Speaker 2: Dude, don't let your boyfriend stop you from finding your husband. 143 00:06:52,440 --> 00:06:56,400 Speaker 1: Exactly. That's so true. All the wrong comms saying shut up, Riley, 144 00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,720 Speaker 1: shut up up. Don I agree with that. All these 145 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:05,360 Speaker 1: rom coms are encouraging people to keep with someone else's partner. Yeah, 146 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:06,360 Speaker 1: that's what they all said. 147 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:07,040 Speaker 2: It's true love. 148 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:11,400 Speaker 1: Someone goes to your girl and they're like, I'm gonna 149 00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:13,680 Speaker 1: fight for true love and I'm going to fight to 150 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:16,640 Speaker 1: be with you. You're like, yeah, yeah, that's cool. 151 00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:21,440 Speaker 3: See told you, told you I'm the rom com here. 152 00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:24,200 Speaker 1: Okay, I'm the sweet Southern boy. This is a rom com. 153 00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:25,880 Speaker 3: I'm the sweet Southern boy from the South. She's a 154 00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:28,720 Speaker 3: city gu Sobersau. That's that's a rom com. 155 00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:30,560 Speaker 1: But there's no cheating, so they won't make a movie 156 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:33,320 Speaker 1: about it. Apparently there needs to be cheating involved. It 157 00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:36,160 Speaker 1: was genuinely really jarring to be sitting there with her 158 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,600 Speaker 1: and Mark and basically feeling like I didn't know my 159 00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:41,400 Speaker 1: girlfriend at all. It was like he turned her into 160 00:07:41,440 --> 00:07:44,160 Speaker 1: a completely different person who didn't even care. 161 00:07:44,280 --> 00:07:46,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, she was like happy for once. 162 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:52,560 Speaker 1: Right exactly? Who didn't even care that I was alive? Bob, 163 00:07:52,600 --> 00:07:55,880 Speaker 1: he's ready to die. So finally, at one point, when 164 00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,040 Speaker 1: Jordan got up to go to the bathroom, I just 165 00:07:58,080 --> 00:08:00,880 Speaker 1: said to Mark, so, are you to my girl or 166 00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:03,720 Speaker 1: what's going on here? Mark said, nothing is going on 167 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,080 Speaker 1: at all. That ship sailed a long time ago, but 168 00:08:06,160 --> 00:08:06,640 Speaker 1: I've been. 169 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:15,720 Speaker 2: Badding after it. I'm adchasing that chip. It's my wife. 170 00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:20,440 Speaker 1: Twel Sam, do you want to do? You want to 171 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:23,200 Speaker 1: read this thing? Sure? So I'll be I'll be OPU 172 00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:25,080 Speaker 1: be Mark? Right? What does that mean? Did you guys 173 00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 1: date at some point? 174 00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:30,840 Speaker 2: No, bro, we never did, And when she left the church, 175 00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:33,280 Speaker 2: we both knew it meant that we were never going 176 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:36,480 Speaker 2: to and we've accepted being in each other's lives just 177 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:42,240 Speaker 2: as friends. There's nothing else going on at all. 178 00:08:43,559 --> 00:08:46,600 Speaker 1: See like that makes it sound like the only reason 179 00:08:46,679 --> 00:08:49,840 Speaker 1: that you're not together is because she left the church. 180 00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:59,440 Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Sorry? My line, Well, what 181 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:02,719 Speaker 1: if she came back to the church, would you marry her. 182 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:05,320 Speaker 2: Oh God, she's not going to do that. You don't 183 00:09:05,360 --> 00:09:07,520 Speaker 2: have to worry about that, bro. You might as well 184 00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:10,600 Speaker 2: ask what would happen if a bicycle had six tires? 185 00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,199 Speaker 2: You could ask me, I'm trying. 186 00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:16,600 Speaker 1: To build it, just like I'm trying to get bicycle 187 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:19,120 Speaker 1: back back in the church. Oh my god. And so 188 00:09:19,240 --> 00:09:22,600 Speaker 1: then when Jordan came back to the table, Mark said 189 00:09:22,640 --> 00:09:24,920 Speaker 1: to her, Opie wants to know if we'd be married 190 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:26,760 Speaker 1: if you weren't a godless heathen? 191 00:09:27,120 --> 00:09:29,160 Speaker 3: Oh why did you two call your mom while I 192 00:09:29,280 --> 00:09:29,560 Speaker 3: was gone? 193 00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:32,439 Speaker 1: And then she and Mark just both started laughing about 194 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:34,199 Speaker 1: it and changed the subject. 195 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,520 Speaker 2: Another freaking inside joke that Opie's not in on. 196 00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:41,200 Speaker 1: Yes, yes he's he's and he's like he's coated saying 197 00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:43,000 Speaker 1: that to a p like, oh, as soon as I 198 00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:43,880 Speaker 1: get her, But he's like. 199 00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,840 Speaker 2: As soon as she's in the church, like we're big over, 200 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:49,000 Speaker 2: but like she's just not gonna enter. But like, dude, 201 00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:51,559 Speaker 2: as soon as she gets in, all bets are off. 202 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:53,640 Speaker 2: I'm on that six wheel bicycle. 203 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:56,320 Speaker 1: Because of the dinner and that conversation and everything else 204 00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,880 Speaker 1: that I've written about in this post, I really feel 205 00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:00,600 Speaker 1: like Jordan and Mark are in in love with each 206 00:10:00,640 --> 00:10:03,040 Speaker 1: other and they're not just best friends like they say, 207 00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:06,319 Speaker 1: and the only reason they aren't together is because they 208 00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:10,560 Speaker 1: can't compromise about their religion. I think that Jordan thinks 209 00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:14,679 Speaker 1: that's okay because she's okay with that decision. She expects 210 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:18,160 Speaker 1: me to be okay with being a second choice, And 211 00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:21,560 Speaker 1: in the meantime, she's actually secretly waiting to be with Mark. 212 00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:25,760 Speaker 1: So that makes me think that I should probably obviously 213 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:28,840 Speaker 1: just have the self respect and break up with her, 214 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:31,840 Speaker 1: because I shouldn't be in a relationship with someone who 215 00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:34,320 Speaker 1: would rather be with someone else. 216 00:10:34,559 --> 00:10:39,559 Speaker 2: Dude, he's head, Dude, he is, he is. I mean, 217 00:10:39,559 --> 00:10:43,080 Speaker 2: they're obviously super into each other. That's There's what it's 218 00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:44,080 Speaker 2: goes into each other. 219 00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:46,960 Speaker 1: And we'll talk about this more later at the first break, 220 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,679 Speaker 1: but I think Opie needs to confront her by he 221 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:50,640 Speaker 1: needs to talk to herr And. 222 00:10:50,679 --> 00:10:56,360 Speaker 2: So basically, uh, Mark would be with Jordan if she 223 00:10:56,480 --> 00:10:59,960 Speaker 2: was in the church, and Jordan wants to be with Mark, 224 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:01,440 Speaker 2: but she doesn't want to be in the church. 225 00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:05,960 Speaker 1: Correct she's left the church. She's like, I'm done, Yeah, dude, 226 00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:06,960 Speaker 1: a while ago. 227 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:10,360 Speaker 2: Well just know, like outside of church, you're her number one. 228 00:11:10,520 --> 00:11:12,280 Speaker 2: But as soon as you step in that. 229 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:14,880 Speaker 1: Church, once the Lord gets in, the Lord. 230 00:11:15,120 --> 00:11:17,160 Speaker 2: Is looking her and Mark Stark cooking. 231 00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:19,880 Speaker 1: But then the problem for me is that our relationship 232 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:22,720 Speaker 1: has been so perfect and Jordan has always treated me 233 00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:26,360 Speaker 1: so well except for this one night, the only time 234 00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:29,520 Speaker 1: she's ever acted like this on the one occasion that 235 00:11:29,559 --> 00:11:33,120 Speaker 1: Mark was around in person. Normally, even when she's talking 236 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:35,600 Speaker 1: to him all the time, she's never made me feel 237 00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:38,080 Speaker 1: this way because remember they had all these face times 238 00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 1: and all this stuff. Right, So, on the one hand, 239 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:44,000 Speaker 1: I'm wondering if maybe it doesn't matter what Jordan's feelings 240 00:11:44,080 --> 00:11:46,720 Speaker 1: are for Mark as long as he isn't going to 241 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:50,480 Speaker 1: be around, it doesn't actually affect our relationship. So maybe 242 00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:52,240 Speaker 1: I just need to cool off and go back to 243 00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:55,960 Speaker 1: trusting her that they are indeed friends, even if it 244 00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:58,640 Speaker 1: seems that that's true and that they have complicated feelings 245 00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:03,360 Speaker 1: for each other. Or should I just end things? And 246 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:05,840 Speaker 1: we have some relevant comments, but let's take this talk 247 00:12:05,880 --> 00:12:07,080 Speaker 1: real quick. 248 00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:10,040 Speaker 2: It is tricky because it's like, this is one day 249 00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:13,960 Speaker 2: and the relationship has been great otherwise. But I think 250 00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:15,679 Speaker 2: seeing that I would be like. 251 00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:20,440 Speaker 1: I think, Op, Like, yeah, Op needs to sit down 252 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:22,679 Speaker 1: with her and be like, hey, this is just what 253 00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:26,040 Speaker 1: I'm seeing and I'm feeling. I see and feel that 254 00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:31,920 Speaker 1: you do still have feelings for Mark and you probably 255 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:37,000 Speaker 1: would have a relationship with him if it weren't for 256 00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:41,800 Speaker 1: the church, and like that's something that I don't know 257 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:44,120 Speaker 1: if I can get over. 258 00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:47,320 Speaker 2: And also, uh, it's not this one night, op this 259 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,040 Speaker 2: is an ongoing offense, like this is this is happening. 260 00:12:50,040 --> 00:12:53,680 Speaker 2: You're only seeing it when you see both of them together, 261 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:56,000 Speaker 2: and like you're witnessing it. 262 00:12:57,480 --> 00:13:01,679 Speaker 1: I do believe it is possible that she genuinely like 263 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:05,360 Speaker 1: convinced herself that like, oh, like it's so I've I've 264 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:07,640 Speaker 1: accepted kind of like what Opie said, She's like, oh, 265 00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:10,520 Speaker 1: I've accepted this, but it's it's like a thing that 266 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:14,880 Speaker 1: Opie needs to actually think through and be okay with, 267 00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:15,760 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. 268 00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:18,200 Speaker 2: It's just hard when you see your girlfriend vibe in 269 00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:22,200 Speaker 2: with with someone else more than you. Yeah, not not 270 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:23,960 Speaker 2: not fun. Would you break up? 271 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:28,560 Speaker 1: Hmmm? I think, like op said, it's like, okay, I 272 00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:30,440 Speaker 1: have to like first you have to have a conversation. 273 00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:32,920 Speaker 1: Then you have to ask yourself, okay, if this is 274 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:36,400 Speaker 1: really you know, this is what I'm seeing. Am I 275 00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:38,600 Speaker 1: okay with this? And I don't know if I would 276 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:39,240 Speaker 1: be okay with that. 277 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:40,800 Speaker 2: I wouldn't be okay with it. I don't think I 278 00:13:40,840 --> 00:13:42,080 Speaker 2: would say I would say like. 279 00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:45,000 Speaker 1: Hey, this, I don't I like this. I like this 280 00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:47,079 Speaker 1: one bit. Yeah, yeah, you have. 281 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:48,920 Speaker 2: To say, and like, we got to put up some 282 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:53,920 Speaker 2: emotional boundaries here because this is not I think, how 283 00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:56,080 Speaker 2: you talk to just a friend. I feel like, yeah, 284 00:13:56,280 --> 00:14:01,960 Speaker 2: there is intimacy or intimacy and it I think it 285 00:14:02,040 --> 00:14:05,600 Speaker 2: just makes me insecure about are the longevity of our 286 00:14:05,679 --> 00:14:08,000 Speaker 2: relationship when it feels like this is like the person 287 00:14:08,040 --> 00:14:09,400 Speaker 2: that you would have been with if you were in 288 00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:11,719 Speaker 2: the in the church. So I feel like there has 289 00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:14,559 Speaker 2: to be some limit on this relationship. And I also 290 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:17,320 Speaker 2: feel bad about like cutting that person off from like 291 00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:18,320 Speaker 2: one of their best friends. 292 00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:20,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think you can do. I think for now, 293 00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:23,720 Speaker 1: it's just communicating how you feel and also trying to 294 00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:27,080 Speaker 1: get to the root of like do you not see 295 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:28,640 Speaker 1: this you know as an issue? 296 00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:29,200 Speaker 2: Yeah? 297 00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:32,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, And like that alone, the fact that they just 298 00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:35,760 Speaker 1: view it so differently and they can't get alignment on that, 299 00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:38,200 Speaker 1: that alone could be the reason for Yeah. 300 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,840 Speaker 2: I don't think I would break up immediately, but like 301 00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:43,240 Speaker 2: I'm I'm on my road. Road, We're on the road, 302 00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:45,239 Speaker 2: not six wheel by merged. 303 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:48,400 Speaker 3: Into the I've had a conversation with someone before, where 304 00:14:48,440 --> 00:14:51,480 Speaker 3: like I was in like emotional cheating territory, where like 305 00:14:51,800 --> 00:14:53,720 Speaker 3: I was having some hardships and I was talking to 306 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:55,680 Speaker 3: like a friend that was a girl and she had 307 00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:57,880 Speaker 3: a conversation where like, this is just between you and I. 308 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,480 Speaker 3: This isn't like with someone. So I think, like that 309 00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:01,640 Speaker 3: boundary would be fair. 310 00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:04,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, because you know there is a world where maybe 311 00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:06,960 Speaker 1: Opie's misreading it. You know, I think, yeah, talking needs 312 00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:10,680 Speaker 1: to happen. Speaking so much the levant comments are talking 313 00:15:10,680 --> 00:15:14,440 Speaker 1: to OPI. So Ribby Chelseky says, uh, what did Jordans 314 00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:16,360 Speaker 1: say about all this? When the two of you got 315 00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:19,880 Speaker 1: home and had a private discussion, Opie said, we didn't 316 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:22,480 Speaker 1: talk about it again. I've just been trying to weigh 317 00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:24,600 Speaker 1: things out on my own for the last few days. 318 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:26,600 Speaker 1: I wasn't sure how I should try to talk to 319 00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:28,800 Speaker 1: her about it or if that was the best idea. 320 00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:32,680 Speaker 1: And there were comments on how inappropriate the girlfriend's behavior was. 321 00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:35,880 Speaker 1: Ali kat Tututu says, I may get some hay for this, 322 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:40,760 Speaker 1: But I am a female whose best friend is a guy, 323 00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:43,600 Speaker 1: and I don't even do more than give him a 324 00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:46,600 Speaker 1: quick hug before we part after hanging out. That may 325 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:49,480 Speaker 1: be just me, but I couldn't imagine holding hands and 326 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:52,640 Speaker 1: touching four heads together, especially if my significant other is 327 00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:55,680 Speaker 1: there if I had one. How does growing up with 328 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:59,160 Speaker 1: someone equate to needing to hold hands and touching fore arms, 329 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:02,320 Speaker 1: et cetera. To me? That comes off as disrespectful. Now, 330 00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:04,680 Speaker 1: Having said that, though I do believe the best thing 331 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:07,640 Speaker 1: to do is to talk with her agreed, Ignoring it 332 00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:10,600 Speaker 1: won't get you anywhere, And I admit, I admit that 333 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:13,760 Speaker 1: the way that I may view things doesn't mean that's 334 00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:16,640 Speaker 1: the way she viewed it or necessarily was trying to 335 00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:19,440 Speaker 1: make it flirtatious either. The only way to work through 336 00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:21,880 Speaker 1: these things in a relationship is letting your partner know 337 00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:25,280 Speaker 1: how you feel in situations. If you don't discuss things 338 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:28,600 Speaker 1: that you might be feeling uncomfortable with, you won't have 339 00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:33,160 Speaker 1: a good continual foundation for your relationship. Otherwise, I wish 340 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:35,480 Speaker 1: you all the best and hope thing and hope you 341 00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:38,520 Speaker 1: can work things out. I heard something recently that was 342 00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:40,960 Speaker 1: really good, you know, how they say, like where I 343 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,720 Speaker 1: see the color red, you see the color purple, Like 344 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:45,080 Speaker 1: maybe you have different colors. That's like a good analogy, 345 00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:47,360 Speaker 1: I feel like for things in a relationship, because people 346 00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:51,360 Speaker 1: might have different people almost always will have different definitions, 347 00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 1: even if slightly, for different things like what is the 348 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:56,800 Speaker 1: right behavior when engaging with a person you could be 349 00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:59,920 Speaker 1: attracted to? And like you need to like sit down, 350 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:04,600 Speaker 1: and like Helena Baine says, talk all caps because you 351 00:17:04,680 --> 00:17:08,520 Speaker 1: need to figure out what those things are. And clearly she's, 352 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,359 Speaker 1: you know, violating Opie's boundaries, but she doesn't know what 353 00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:13,520 Speaker 1: those boundaries are. Yeah, you know what I mean. 354 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:18,600 Speaker 2: So yeah, give her the opportunity to treat you right exactly. 355 00:17:18,720 --> 00:17:20,480 Speaker 1: Yes, that's a great give her oportunity to treat you right. 356 00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:22,359 Speaker 1: Same twenty twenty four. That's a that's a that's a 357 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:25,919 Speaker 1: banger right there. So Sindry comments, she's obviously carrying a 358 00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:28,959 Speaker 1: torch that will never go out. If you knowing you're 359 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,320 Speaker 1: a runner up, something you could live with, give it 360 00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:34,320 Speaker 1: a shot. Hey, listen, second place is still second place. 361 00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:37,000 Speaker 1: You still get on the podium at the Olympics. That's 362 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:40,200 Speaker 1: all I'm saying. But two years isn't long, and there's 363 00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:42,760 Speaker 1: a lot of years left. If something changes and a 364 00:17:42,840 --> 00:17:46,280 Speaker 1: later opportunity opens up, she could go running. She'd go running. 365 00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:50,000 Speaker 1: Opie says, That's the big thing that scares me, because 366 00:17:50,040 --> 00:17:52,600 Speaker 1: I do think that I could maybe live with the 367 00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:54,760 Speaker 1: fact that there was someone else before me, and that 368 00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:57,560 Speaker 1: she eventually did choose me over him. But then I 369 00:17:57,600 --> 00:18:00,680 Speaker 1: think about what could happen if Mark decided that he 370 00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:03,480 Speaker 1: was ever going to leave the church like Jordan did. 371 00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:04,679 Speaker 1: We didn't even think about that. 372 00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:06,440 Speaker 2: What if he leaves a church to be with her, 373 00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:11,480 Speaker 2: which sounds it sounds like very possible, Yeah right, Which 374 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:13,360 Speaker 2: doesn't seem like it's going to happen. 375 00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:15,160 Speaker 1: From the way they both talk about it. But then 376 00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:17,240 Speaker 1: I know that I'm a different person now at twenty 377 00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,800 Speaker 1: nine than I was at twenty six, so it is 378 00:18:19,840 --> 00:18:22,520 Speaker 1: not impossible for him to change his mind. And then 379 00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:24,520 Speaker 1: if that was really the only reason that Jordan was 380 00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:27,919 Speaker 1: with me, of course she'd leave to go be with 381 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:31,080 Speaker 1: him like she always wanted to. Now we have our 382 00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:34,320 Speaker 1: first update of many. It's a big, long, juicy story. 383 00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:40,600 Speaker 1: It's two days later. Do we have any predictions as 384 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:42,119 Speaker 1: to what's going to happen in this first update. 385 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,280 Speaker 2: If I was to predict, I think they break up, 386 00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:46,520 Speaker 2: but I do think they need to talk. 387 00:18:46,640 --> 00:18:48,800 Speaker 1: I think that they talk, and I don't know if 388 00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:50,640 Speaker 1: they break up in this update. We've got a lot 389 00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:53,960 Speaker 1: to go. But I think that she'll try to downplay 390 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:55,800 Speaker 1: and be like, oh, it's not that serious and nope. 391 00:18:55,800 --> 00:18:58,000 Speaker 1: He's like hey, like is this really bothers me? But 392 00:18:58,040 --> 00:18:59,840 Speaker 1: she's like no, no, no, like it's just it's just friendship. 393 00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:01,760 Speaker 1: I'm never going back to the church. He's staying in 394 00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:03,199 Speaker 1: the church, like, just don't worry about it. 395 00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:05,960 Speaker 2: Like, yeah, well, I think the behavior needs to change 396 00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:08,480 Speaker 2: for this to be okay. Like it's okay to have 397 00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:11,560 Speaker 2: had feelings for someone, it's okay to be friends with 398 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:15,399 Speaker 2: like the opposite gender, but it's not okay to have 399 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:18,600 Speaker 2: feelings act in life feelings. 400 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:22,320 Speaker 1: And hold hands in and hold. Can they hug? They 401 00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:26,280 Speaker 1: can hug side so I hug could could uh? She 402 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:31,040 Speaker 1: that you you had hug his special member with with 403 00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:32,680 Speaker 1: her other parts? 404 00:19:33,320 --> 00:19:33,720 Speaker 2: No? 405 00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:35,480 Speaker 1: No, no, no, no special hug. 406 00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:39,560 Speaker 2: No, no feeding each other food. Don't like that. No 407 00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:43,639 Speaker 2: touching shoulders, no touching, no, no touching chest or arms. 408 00:19:44,119 --> 00:19:46,800 Speaker 1: Well, guys are ready for this first update? Yeah, let's 409 00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:49,320 Speaker 1: do it. So I talked to Jordan Wednesday night. Oh. 410 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:52,720 Speaker 1: The TLDR update to the situation is that I didn't 411 00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:55,080 Speaker 1: break up with her after we talked about everything. I 412 00:19:55,119 --> 00:19:57,800 Speaker 1: feel like that would be too much of an overreaction 413 00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,760 Speaker 1: for what's actually going on. I they'll do think that 414 00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:02,720 Speaker 1: I was right to be upset about what I saw 415 00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:07,080 Speaker 1: happening at dinner on Saturday, and Jordan didn't disagree with 416 00:20:07,119 --> 00:20:10,200 Speaker 1: me about that. Good uh, But I think I did 417 00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:12,919 Speaker 1: jump to the wrong conclusion that it meant she was 418 00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:16,040 Speaker 1: secretly wanting to be with Mark more than she wants 419 00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:18,119 Speaker 1: to be with me. Now that we've talked about it, 420 00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,600 Speaker 1: I don't think there's a reason to end what's otherwise 421 00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:23,919 Speaker 1: the best relationship I've ever had. And I'm glad that 422 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:27,320 Speaker 1: I didn't just immediately trust my instincts because there was 423 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,960 Speaker 1: more going on with the situation that I didn't really 424 00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:33,639 Speaker 1: understand that Jordan has since told me like that they're 425 00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:34,640 Speaker 1: just in love with each other. 426 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:38,199 Speaker 2: This is Mark not playing on the same team as 427 00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:38,720 Speaker 2: O Pete. 428 00:20:40,119 --> 00:20:45,480 Speaker 1: That could be it which I wore religious yeah, Church, 429 00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:47,080 Speaker 1: Maybe he's trying to be a monk or something. 430 00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:49,960 Speaker 3: Maybe I think the parents are in cahoots. 431 00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,480 Speaker 1: Oh, because, great theory. 432 00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:55,000 Speaker 3: Did you hear did you talk to your moms again? 433 00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:58,720 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a really, really, really good conspiracy theory. I 434 00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:00,000 Speaker 1: think that could be. Okay. 435 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:03,080 Speaker 3: Imagine they live in the same hometown still, and their 436 00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:04,920 Speaker 3: moms are there, think about holidays. 437 00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,199 Speaker 1: Dude, They're like, we gotta get them married to go. 438 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:12,919 Speaker 1: What's happening? We got and now I do feel like 439 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,640 Speaker 1: she can be given some grace in the situation, assuming 440 00:21:15,760 --> 00:21:18,840 Speaker 1: nothing like this ever happens again. So thanks for the advice, 441 00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:21,159 Speaker 1: especially for everyone who told me to just talk to 442 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:26,960 Speaker 1: her before I go. There's no specifics, Nope, nothing nothing. 443 00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:32,000 Speaker 1: She told me the things I didn't know tell me, 444 00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:33,359 Speaker 1: we don't tell me. 445 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:35,119 Speaker 3: Come on, you can't be doing this with a Reddit posts. 446 00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:35,720 Speaker 2: Come on. 447 00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:39,800 Speaker 1: She told me about niche industry. And then after after that, 448 00:21:40,359 --> 00:21:44,040 Speaker 1: I felt great. When we talked. I decided to take 449 00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:46,160 Speaker 1: the main piece of advice that I got from everyone 450 00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:48,920 Speaker 1: and start by telling Jordan that my feelings were hurt 451 00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:50,880 Speaker 1: by the way that she treated me at dinner with Mark, 452 00:21:51,119 --> 00:21:53,080 Speaker 1: which I think is a good move, uh, and then 453 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,640 Speaker 1: see how the conversation went from there. It turned into 454 00:21:56,720 --> 00:21:59,040 Speaker 1: a very long talk. So I don't want to try 455 00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:01,480 Speaker 1: to remember exact quotes and get them wrong, but here 456 00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:04,600 Speaker 1: are the important things. I repeated to Jordans some of 457 00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:06,480 Speaker 1: what I wrote in the post and said I felt 458 00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:09,680 Speaker 1: excluded by her and Mark, especially because they were being 459 00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,640 Speaker 1: overly touchy feely with each other to the point where 460 00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:16,280 Speaker 1: it made me uncomfortable. Jordan seemed surprised, like she didn't 461 00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:19,280 Speaker 1: even notice and that she and Mark were touching each 462 00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:21,560 Speaker 1: other that much. But then she thought about it and 463 00:22:21,600 --> 00:22:26,800 Speaker 1: she said that I was right and apologized. Nice. Nice. 464 00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:30,440 Speaker 1: She said that Mark is always really touchy with everybody 465 00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:35,120 Speaker 1: and not just her. I asked, yeah, he touches everybody. 466 00:22:35,160 --> 00:22:37,960 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, he never touched me because we were in. 467 00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:44,040 Speaker 1: The bathroom together and he didn't even longingly, and so 468 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:46,919 Speaker 1: she didn't even think about it, but that she wished 469 00:22:46,960 --> 00:22:49,480 Speaker 1: I would have said something at the time because she 470 00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:54,040 Speaker 1: didn't realize they were being that obnoxious, which I don't know. 471 00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:56,200 Speaker 1: That's a lot. You had a long talk. 472 00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:57,880 Speaker 3: You can't just say hey, can you come over here 473 00:22:57,920 --> 00:22:59,600 Speaker 3: and then have a long talk while he's there. 474 00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:02,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I feel like it's a lot fair to say. Yeah, 475 00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:05,040 Speaker 2: I he couldn't have said something in the moment. 476 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:08,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I mean he could have, but that's that's that's. 477 00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:10,000 Speaker 2: It's more whacked, like stopped talking. He already kind of 478 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,320 Speaker 2: did do this, stop talking to my girlfriend, and it's 479 00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:16,679 Speaker 2: kind of like a whack. It feels it. It's like 480 00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:20,440 Speaker 2: an insecure move for a guy to be like, stop 481 00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:23,440 Speaker 2: talking to my girl this loose scenario, yeah, because it's 482 00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:27,320 Speaker 2: like ideally the girlfriend should be enforcing the boundaries and 483 00:23:27,359 --> 00:23:31,080 Speaker 2: not you shouldn't have to have or whatever partner, like 484 00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:34,320 Speaker 2: like your partner should enforce the boundaries. You shouldn't have to, 485 00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:36,960 Speaker 2: and when you feel like you have to, then that's 486 00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:39,520 Speaker 2: like it just makes you look insecure and just a whack. 487 00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:40,080 Speaker 1: You can't win. 488 00:23:40,160 --> 00:23:41,360 Speaker 2: You can't win, you can't win. 489 00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:43,879 Speaker 1: I said that was part of what bothered me because 490 00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:46,560 Speaker 1: I thought that normally she would have noticed something like that, 491 00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:49,000 Speaker 1: but she was acting so different around Mark and not 492 00:23:49,040 --> 00:23:53,199 Speaker 1: paying any attention to anything else, including how I was feeling, 493 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:56,040 Speaker 1: and that it was honestly just made me question which 494 00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:58,280 Speaker 1: one of us she cared about more, or if she 495 00:23:58,359 --> 00:24:01,240 Speaker 1: cared about him as more than just a friend. Jordan 496 00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:04,240 Speaker 1: apologized more and said that she could understand why it 497 00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:06,160 Speaker 1: would look that way to me, but that she loves 498 00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:08,800 Speaker 1: me and cares about me more than anyone else in 499 00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:11,439 Speaker 1: the world, and that she didn't mean to act like 500 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,680 Speaker 1: that or make me feel that way. You see, it's 501 00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:18,280 Speaker 1: just that Mark is out of this world, got him. 502 00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,920 Speaker 1: She said that she was trying to not make Mark 503 00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:24,639 Speaker 1: feel like a third wheel because of him being a 504 00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:30,520 Speaker 1: single guy with a couple, but obviously it backfired. He 505 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:33,320 Speaker 1: made me feel like the third reel and just made 506 00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:35,400 Speaker 1: me feel like the third reel There you go instead, 507 00:24:35,480 --> 00:24:38,880 Speaker 1: which wasn't what she wanted either. After that, Jordan explained 508 00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:41,119 Speaker 1: a lot to me about her history with Mark, and 509 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:44,600 Speaker 1: basically as she explained it, she said that she fully 510 00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:47,080 Speaker 1: admits she cares about him as more than just a 511 00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:50,520 Speaker 1: normal friend, but she says it's not in a romantic way. 512 00:24:51,119 --> 00:24:54,560 Speaker 1: She said that's why she's always specifically refers to him 513 00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:57,840 Speaker 1: as her best friend quote unquote, and not just her friend, 514 00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:01,960 Speaker 1: and said that she would use the phrase he's like 515 00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:05,240 Speaker 1: my brother if there's a washing machine involved. 516 00:25:05,359 --> 00:25:09,399 Speaker 2: Oh, we haven't heard that before. He's like a brother 517 00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:15,520 Speaker 2: to me. There's a whole thing on TikTok of like, uh, 518 00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:17,800 Speaker 2: he's like a brother to me. And then like they 519 00:25:17,920 --> 00:25:22,560 Speaker 2: like like they do. Like, yeah, he carries her. Yeah, 520 00:25:22,840 --> 00:25:25,960 Speaker 2: she like piggybaggg. She's like a brother to the. 521 00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:29,119 Speaker 1: Running jump hug. Yeah dude. Now, if it weren't for 522 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,760 Speaker 1: the fact that she once had an actual brother, rest 523 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,080 Speaker 1: in peace. So her brother passed away, uh, so, she 524 00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:38,440 Speaker 1: wouldn't use that as a phrasing for anyone else. According 525 00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:41,160 Speaker 1: to Jordan, the main thing that happened to make her 526 00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:43,520 Speaker 1: and Mark so close was that when she was seventeen, 527 00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:46,080 Speaker 1: she tried to take her own life, and that was 528 00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:49,680 Speaker 1: actually when everyone else in the community stopped talking to her, 529 00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:53,000 Speaker 1: and Mark was the only person who didn't. For the 530 00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:56,160 Speaker 1: next couple of years until she moved, he was literally 531 00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:58,880 Speaker 1: her only friend, she said that checked in on her 532 00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:01,840 Speaker 1: every single day to make sure that she stayed alive, 533 00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:04,679 Speaker 1: which is also why they got into the habit of 534 00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,640 Speaker 1: talking on the phone so much. And also apparently during 535 00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,719 Speaker 1: that time, Mark's parents thought that they were dating and 536 00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:13,840 Speaker 1: made a big deal about how they shouldn't be and 537 00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:17,720 Speaker 1: that's why she made the remark during dinner. Apparently, calling 538 00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:21,439 Speaker 1: Jordan a godless heathen is something that Mark's mom said, 539 00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:25,840 Speaker 1: but again inside jokes. Just just explain it God. 540 00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:28,320 Speaker 3: Anyways, how many inside jokes can you have with another 541 00:26:28,359 --> 00:26:29,240 Speaker 3: person before it's a body. 542 00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:33,480 Speaker 1: That's a golden rule. Where where's the limit of inside jokes? 543 00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:36,480 Speaker 2: I don't think there's a limit, but you gotta come on, 544 00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:38,920 Speaker 2: would you have a certain amount of inside jokes with 545 00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:43,040 Speaker 2: someone you're basically inside of them? 546 00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:45,960 Speaker 1: A great word for great word? 547 00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:48,679 Speaker 2: I know. I don't think so. I don't think so. 548 00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:52,120 Speaker 2: I think, but I think it's rude to, if you're 549 00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:55,800 Speaker 2: in a like a group of people, to make too 550 00:26:55,880 --> 00:26:59,840 Speaker 2: many inside jokes that other people can't understand. 551 00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:03,600 Speaker 1: Hundred inside jokes, side jokes. 552 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:05,400 Speaker 2: You can have as many inside jokes as you want, 553 00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:07,120 Speaker 2: a thousand, you just can't. You shouldn't. 554 00:27:07,119 --> 00:27:07,560 Speaker 1: You shouldn't. 555 00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:09,919 Speaker 2: It's rude to like do them all in front of 556 00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:10,399 Speaker 2: other people. 557 00:27:10,440 --> 00:27:12,440 Speaker 1: You know what, I might be on Riley with this one. 558 00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:14,680 Speaker 1: I think I think there is a limit. I think 559 00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:16,680 Speaker 1: there might be a little bit. It's like the orange 560 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:18,199 Speaker 1: Field test. It's an indicator that. 561 00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:19,840 Speaker 2: As many inside jokes. 562 00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:21,560 Speaker 3: Well, if you have a lot of inside jokes with 563 00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:23,480 Speaker 3: someone and you haven't seen you another, why't you spend 564 00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:24,560 Speaker 3: that much time with that person? 565 00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:27,640 Speaker 2: Maybe they can't have more inside jokes than you. That's 566 00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:29,000 Speaker 2: you have with any inside jokes. 567 00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:31,920 Speaker 1: I think there's like it's it's a it's a large number, 568 00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:33,680 Speaker 1: but I think there I think there is a limit. 569 00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:35,720 Speaker 1: If we're in Sam's Golden rule type. 570 00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:37,200 Speaker 2: Terrace, there's no limit. There's no limit. 571 00:27:37,400 --> 00:27:40,919 Speaker 1: Well, Opie goes on to say, I did tell Jordan 572 00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:43,520 Speaker 1: that Mark basically said to me that he thought the 573 00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:47,399 Speaker 1: two of them would be married if she stayed in 574 00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:49,760 Speaker 1: the church. And I asked her if she thinks that, 575 00:27:49,840 --> 00:27:52,199 Speaker 1: if maybe Mark is in love with her, even if 576 00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:55,119 Speaker 1: she doesn't feel the same way. Oh no, So she 577 00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:58,639 Speaker 1: said no, definitely not, And I don't think she was 578 00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,280 Speaker 1: being dishonest. I really don't agree with her, but I 579 00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:04,919 Speaker 1: think she genuinely believes that Mark isn't into her in 580 00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:10,119 Speaker 1: any way apart from a friendship. So Mark still totally 581 00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:13,880 Speaker 1: could have feelings, but he genuinely believes that in her 582 00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:17,560 Speaker 1: mind that that's not the case. Her opinion of the 583 00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:20,120 Speaker 1: situation is that she also thinks that she and Mark 584 00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:23,400 Speaker 1: would eventually have gotten married if she had never left 585 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:26,280 Speaker 1: the church or moved, but from her perspective, it would 586 00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:29,320 Speaker 1: have been more because of her peer pressure than anything else, 587 00:28:29,560 --> 00:28:32,080 Speaker 1: and she doesn't think it would necessarily have been a 588 00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:35,320 Speaker 1: good thing, low key like love marriage versus like arranged 589 00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:37,240 Speaker 1: marriage almost type vibes. That is what I'm getting here. 590 00:28:37,680 --> 00:28:40,240 Speaker 1: She thinks Mark was just being honest about that, and 591 00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:43,520 Speaker 1: that possibly from his perspective, he thinks he and Jordan 592 00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:46,280 Speaker 1: would have made a good couple. But he probably is 593 00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:49,360 Speaker 1: thinking that because he's just assuming that in the scenario 594 00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:52,960 Speaker 1: that she'd be the perfect church wife. So there's no 595 00:28:53,120 --> 00:28:55,960 Speaker 1: reason why they'd be a good couple, which I could 596 00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,840 Speaker 1: get that if he explained if he explained it that way. 597 00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:02,480 Speaker 1: He didn't explain it that way in my opinion. Yeah, 598 00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:04,440 Speaker 1: But the big thing that happened at the end of 599 00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:07,200 Speaker 1: the conversation is that Jordan told me that Mark is 600 00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:09,800 Speaker 1: coming back through our city on his way home from 601 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:12,040 Speaker 1: the trip. So she was going to invite him to 602 00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:14,280 Speaker 1: hang out with the two of us again, but she 603 00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:16,800 Speaker 1: said that if I'm going to be uncomfortable with him 604 00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:19,440 Speaker 1: around that she won't ask him. I thought she was 605 00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:21,960 Speaker 1: going to say, if you're uncomfortable, then we'ld go just 606 00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:23,880 Speaker 1: the two of us, just don't. 607 00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:28,000 Speaker 2: I mean, this is good, just good progress, yeah, at 608 00:29:28,080 --> 00:29:30,600 Speaker 2: least for talking. But it's just it's like kind of 609 00:29:30,640 --> 00:29:35,680 Speaker 2: red flags I've seen people distance over much less. Yeah, 610 00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:37,560 Speaker 2: much much much less. 611 00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:38,360 Speaker 1: Yeah. 612 00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:40,600 Speaker 3: I would invite like a friend that's in the church, 613 00:29:40,760 --> 00:29:42,760 Speaker 3: so it's like a double date. Yeah, and he could 614 00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:45,280 Speaker 3: be all touchy philly with her and your girlfriend. 615 00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:47,520 Speaker 1: There you go. Now, a lot of people were saying 616 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:49,760 Speaker 1: that if she didn't offer to cut contact with him 617 00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:52,280 Speaker 1: or to cut down on contact with him, it meant 618 00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:54,760 Speaker 1: that she valued him over me. So the fact that 619 00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:57,280 Speaker 1: she brought uh, brought up on her own that she 620 00:29:57,360 --> 00:30:00,680 Speaker 1: wouldn't invite him to dinner with us again because I 621 00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:02,840 Speaker 1: didn't like it, seemed like a really good sign to me. 622 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:06,440 Speaker 1: Based on everything else that she said, I do understand 623 00:30:06,520 --> 00:30:09,680 Speaker 1: why she didn't offer to totally stop being friends with him, 624 00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:12,560 Speaker 1: and I wouldn't expect her to after what she told 625 00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:16,640 Speaker 1: me what happened when she was a teenager. So now 626 00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:19,960 Speaker 1: I'm deciding to take Jordan's word for it that although 627 00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,760 Speaker 1: she and Mark are weirdly close, it's for the reasons 628 00:30:22,760 --> 00:30:25,040 Speaker 1: that she explained to me, and not because she is 629 00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:27,080 Speaker 1: in love with him. I think the fact that she 630 00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:30,600 Speaker 1: was immediately apologetic instead of defensive was good, and the 631 00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:33,239 Speaker 1: way she explained everything did make sense to me. That 632 00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:36,480 Speaker 1: makes sense to me. I don't necessarily trust Mark, but 633 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:39,480 Speaker 1: I do think I can trust Jordan, my partner. But 634 00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:42,560 Speaker 1: I am going to watch and see if if it 635 00:30:42,600 --> 00:30:45,239 Speaker 1: seems like she's still talking to him as much as 636 00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:48,000 Speaker 1: she used to, or if anything changes or sounds different. 637 00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:50,400 Speaker 1: I'm not going to be controlling and tell her that 638 00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:52,640 Speaker 1: she can't talk to him or that she has to 639 00:30:52,680 --> 00:30:55,120 Speaker 1: talk to him less, but I want to see if 640 00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:58,480 Speaker 1: me talking to her about all of this causes her 641 00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:01,080 Speaker 1: to act at all any different. I'm kind of thinking 642 00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:03,360 Speaker 1: that she might realize on her own that the way 643 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:06,600 Speaker 1: Mark acts towards her actually does seem like he likes 644 00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:08,840 Speaker 1: her as more than a friend, now that I've brought 645 00:31:08,840 --> 00:31:11,440 Speaker 1: it up, But I don't know. It could be that 646 00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:14,080 Speaker 1: things go back to just exactly the way they were before, 647 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:17,719 Speaker 1: and I won't know if anything has actually changed until 648 00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:20,760 Speaker 1: the next time Mark is around in person. But I 649 00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:24,440 Speaker 1: don't think that's something I should keep boring about before 650 00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:25,280 Speaker 1: it happens. 651 00:31:25,400 --> 00:31:28,840 Speaker 3: There's an update two and a half months later. 652 00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:33,480 Speaker 1: Ooh, that's see there. But what are we feeling? Update? 653 00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:34,240 Speaker 1: How we're feeling? 654 00:31:34,280 --> 00:31:37,400 Speaker 2: If something smells stinky usually is, so I think there's 655 00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:38,400 Speaker 2: a little stink here. 656 00:31:38,240 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 1: They'll stink. 657 00:31:39,840 --> 00:31:43,000 Speaker 2: It is good that she's offering to not go to 658 00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:47,080 Speaker 2: the fish market anymore. Yeah, you know, not not subject 659 00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:48,120 Speaker 2: op to the stink. 660 00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:48,840 Speaker 1: It's a beef. 661 00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,760 Speaker 2: So yes, I think there is while there is stink, 662 00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:55,400 Speaker 2: I think she is taking the necessary moves to forbraize 663 00:31:55,440 --> 00:31:56,080 Speaker 2: the stink away. 664 00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:58,280 Speaker 1: She's going on the right She's going in the right direction. 665 00:31:58,280 --> 00:31:59,280 Speaker 2: She's going on the right direction. 666 00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:00,160 Speaker 1: Yeah. 667 00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:02,560 Speaker 2: If she was like not going to change any of 668 00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:05,720 Speaker 2: her behavior, then that would be going in the wrong direction. Yes. 669 00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:08,680 Speaker 2: I think like creating some ground rules of what it 670 00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:12,160 Speaker 2: looks like to engage in a way that makes so 671 00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:16,000 Speaker 2: he feel comfortable is good. But like, like we've said before, 672 00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:19,120 Speaker 2: it's like you can create specific rules for it, but 673 00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:24,040 Speaker 2: there's all there's always gonna be ways to be in 674 00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:27,400 Speaker 2: the rules but not actually abide by the spirit of 675 00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:31,479 Speaker 2: the rules. Yes, and so yeah, so you have to 676 00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:34,440 Speaker 2: like create the rules and then see is she is 677 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:36,080 Speaker 2: she following the spirit of the rule? 678 00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:37,080 Speaker 1: Yes? 679 00:32:37,480 --> 00:32:41,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know that that it will be kind 680 00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:42,160 Speaker 2: of up to your interpretation. 681 00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:47,000 Speaker 1: Do you believe that she genuinely thinks like she doesn't 682 00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:48,720 Speaker 1: have feelings for him and he doesn't have. 683 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:50,840 Speaker 2: Feeling I think potentially, but it doesn't make it any 684 00:32:50,920 --> 00:32:53,760 Speaker 2: less damaging to the relationship or like if. 685 00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:56,440 Speaker 1: She doesn't change a Marx the. 686 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,880 Speaker 2: Chicks marks feelings. And also I feel like she might 687 00:32:59,920 --> 00:33:05,800 Speaker 2: not even know her like own emotions, herself well enough 688 00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:09,719 Speaker 2: to realize that it's transgressing into dangerous territory. Something I 689 00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:11,840 Speaker 2: remember talking with an X where I'm like, hey, like, 690 00:33:11,960 --> 00:33:13,960 Speaker 2: I believe you that you might not have feelings for 691 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:16,320 Speaker 2: this person right now, but I think you're putting yourself 692 00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:19,640 Speaker 2: in a position where you're setting yourself up for failure. 693 00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:20,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, right now. 694 00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:22,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, And you're not putting yourself in a position where 695 00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:25,560 Speaker 2: I feel like that's going to be true for long 696 00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:28,800 Speaker 2: And so I think, like, I think it's like a 697 00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:31,960 Speaker 2: similar case here. It's like, don't set your up, don't 698 00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:33,880 Speaker 2: don't set up your environment in a place where you're 699 00:33:33,880 --> 00:33:34,320 Speaker 2: gonna fail. 700 00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:37,160 Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, let me let me move in, let me 701 00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:37,880 Speaker 1: move in with it. 702 00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:38,520 Speaker 2: Yeah exactly. 703 00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:41,160 Speaker 1: That's the true tag truth does Oh my god.